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Speaker 1: Welcome to This is Important, a production of I Heart Radio,

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Speaker 1: the show where we only talk about what's obviously most

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Speaker 1: crucially integral to the fabric of our very nature. Today

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Speaker 1: we talk about I jerked off into t J Max wants,

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Speaker 1: isn't that crazy? You make it to the toilet and

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Speaker 1: you still pass your pants? Sometimes I just pushed too

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Speaker 1: hard to fart and then you know, some stuff comes out.

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Speaker 1: We're gonna rab the com slide the whole way. Baby,

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Speaker 1: here we go. Start your engines ring mingming, ming, ming, ming, ming, ming, ming, ming, ming, ming, ming, ming, ming,

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Speaker 1: ming ming ming. This is important. Blake, did you masturbate

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Speaker 1: on a flight when you were a kid? Watching uh,

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Speaker 1: watching some movie? What's up coming again? What where is

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Speaker 1: this coming from? Why are what is this? Gotcha journalism?

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Speaker 1: Right out the gate? Jeez, this has got your journalism. Well, no,

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Speaker 1: you said it on another podcast. I'm wondering why you're

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Speaker 1: telling cool stories about masturbating on planes on other podcasts

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Speaker 1: and you're not mentioning it on our podcast when that's

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Speaker 1: obviously a cool story. Well, first off, I will shout out, yeah,

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Speaker 1: that's still a very friend of the pod, at least

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Speaker 1: from this square of the circle. Uh. Yeah, I told

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Speaker 1: that story on their podcast because we didn't have a podcast.

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Speaker 1: Well what is there? What is their podcast? You gotta

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Speaker 1: call them out? Yeah, but still is the podcast? Oh yeah,

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Speaker 1: but still? Oh I thought you were just I thought

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Speaker 1: you were just saying a phrase. Yeah, Jack Wagner, Brandon Mordell, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: big shout out too the pod. Okay, so you want

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Speaker 1: to you want to give us that story over here?

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Speaker 1: Or is it it's you've already burned it. Well now

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Speaker 1: I feel like they should go over to that pod

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Speaker 1: and check it out there. But did you just hit

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Speaker 1: the friendship button for them or for us? Yeah? What

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Speaker 1: was that? For all of us? Is happening? No? No,

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Speaker 1: no, no no, no, no no no, this is a ship family.

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Speaker 1: I'm feeling very interrogated right now. Well, yeah, he jumped

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Speaker 1: out the gate. He interrogated you. I didn't mean to.

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Speaker 1: I just I literally like, you're pissed. You talked down,

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Speaker 1: came out hot, and I support you. But this isn't

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Speaker 1: I wasn't trying to get at my guy. I was

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Speaker 1: just wondering. I just heard it. It was like five

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Speaker 1: minutes ago. I heard this little clip of Blake telling

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Speaker 1: this funny story and I'm like, why had he never

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Speaker 1: told this story? I feel like we've been telling jerk

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Speaker 1: Off stories, j O stories all the time on this podcast,

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Speaker 1: and I'm always telling some epic tales and Blake had

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Speaker 1: just left this one in the cup. When I feel

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Speaker 1: like this one's prime for you lose. Why know the

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Speaker 1: double discs? You know, it came very organically in that podcast.

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Speaker 1: It wasn't like I was just like chomping at the

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Speaker 1: bit to tell about the time that I j owed

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Speaker 1: on an airplane in my youth. This is pre this

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Speaker 1: is pre come. How old were you, let's dive in.

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Speaker 1: This is pre pre yes, this is pre pre what's

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Speaker 1: pre pre just the air the air shots. This is

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Speaker 1: when he were it was just dustin. Yeah, when he

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Speaker 1: used to just kind of by the way. I feel

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Speaker 1: like a lot of women, a lot of females don't

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Speaker 1: know that that was a thing. Like I told Chloe,

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Speaker 1: I was telling some story a few weeks ago and

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Speaker 1: I tell Chloe this, She's like, what do you mean

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Speaker 1: nothing came out? And I'm like, yeah, before you hit puberty,

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Speaker 1: it doesn't come out. And I was a little late

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Speaker 1: hitting puberty. I was like kind of the smaller kid

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Speaker 1: and so so there was. I was like bummed when

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Speaker 1: it started to happen. I'm like, I gotta clean this up.

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Speaker 1: Every time there used to be no evidence. Now all

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Speaker 1: of a sudden, there's evidence everywhere. There's so much evidence.

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Speaker 1: There's so much. Remember when it first starts, it's just

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Speaker 1: like one clear tear drop. Oh really that's how you

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Speaker 1: saw it? Well? For me, yeah, it was like it

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Speaker 1: was like my dick cried one tear of joy. Okay,

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Speaker 1: you felt good. You are bringing the back specific memories.

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Speaker 1: This is so weird. There's you didn't you didn't do

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Speaker 1: one single tear drop, or you just started one day

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Speaker 1: the faucet turned on and you I just said, you

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Speaker 1: brought back like a very specific memory from me of

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Speaker 1: that exact thing. Oh you had, so you you do

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Speaker 1: remember when you just had. I didn't remember until just now,

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Speaker 1: and I'm like, oh yeah, it was like I think

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Speaker 1: it was only pre right. I think that was just

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Speaker 1: what it was. It wasn't like a it wasn't a

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Speaker 1: load important. I don't know if there was a load.

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Speaker 1: I think it was just like pre I do remember

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Speaker 1: this too. I'm I'm thinking back to the first initially

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Speaker 1: there together Kyle I remember yours, Yes, when we were

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Speaker 1: we looking at the same moon, Kyle, same moon, Hoders.

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Speaker 1: I do believe that mine went from like just only

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Speaker 1: pre too, a real just and wham bam, thank you ma'am,

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Speaker 1: like a real banger. But how do you know that

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Speaker 1: it's pre How do we I think it's the clear

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Speaker 1: because the consistency. You know, come on, man, you've tasted

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Speaker 1: your I mean you've seen here. Yeah, but I mean

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Speaker 1: like at that time, was the pre coming at the

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Speaker 1: end or what I remember it coming at the end?

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Speaker 1: I think it was just a tiny load. So you

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Speaker 1: know what the prefix pre means, right, Yes, that means

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Speaker 1: before before. Yeah, but what is pre stand for? It's

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Speaker 1: probably Latin or some ship premature. Yeah, yeah, you figured

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Speaker 1: it out. And that was a test Kyle. Yes, and

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Speaker 1: the smartest box in the square. What wait, what do

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Speaker 1: you think he just came up with premature premature ejaculation? No, no,

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Speaker 1: because several words have pre and it pre is a prefix.

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Speaker 1: They maybe it's prefixed. Maybe that you think pre you

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Speaker 1: think what hold on? What it's define? Not? Pre? Premature

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Speaker 1: is when you just before you thought you wanted to

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Speaker 1: so then pre come like you couldn't like you couldn't

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Speaker 1: control it. Premature ejaculation. That's what pre come is, before

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Speaker 1: you really come. That's what pre come is. So it's

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Speaker 1: premature come. No, No, what the funk? How is this tracking?

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Speaker 1: Premature ejaculation is like when you bust too quick, Right,

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Speaker 1: that's premature ejaculation. But ejaculation is like a verb, right,

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Speaker 1: that's an action word. Pre come is a noun, So

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Speaker 1: it's premature come. So what's pre coming? Kyle? Yeah, that

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Speaker 1: would be the same as like ejaculation, Buddy, I gotta now. Hey, see, guys,

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Speaker 1: why do you think I'd come out the gates so hot?

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Speaker 1: Because then we start off like a fucking firecracker. Fourth

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Speaker 1: of July is coming up. Can't wait. It's science dogs

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Speaker 1: chasing our own pre come tales here. So what are

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Speaker 1: you saying that pre come it's the stuff that comes

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Speaker 1: before the come. Yes, prematurely premature, that's not premature ejaculation.

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Speaker 1: Hang one, My boys are here hanging, My kids just

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Speaker 1: walking and hang on, what do you Yeah? Now, you

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Speaker 1: know I don't care, Just just don't eat it anyway.

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Speaker 1: Go ahead. You heard it from your uncle's now you know,

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Speaker 1: all right, Cat's out of the bag. That's what pre

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Speaker 1: come is. Okay, now shut up about it. That's it's important.

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Speaker 1: So pre come is just pre come, Isaac saying a

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Speaker 1: preposition previous two before, previous come, previous, previously on come

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Speaker 1: like it's it's just something that goes at the beginning

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Speaker 1: of a word that means previous, Like how like un

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Speaker 1: at the beginning of a word like is that so

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Speaker 1: it's the opposite like unlocked means it's not? Like God,

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Speaker 1: how did words even start? Though? Hey, let's get into it.

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Speaker 1: What let's really unpack. I feel like we're the guys.

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Speaker 1: Here's here's I want to rewind a second to when

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Speaker 1: Blake was jerking off on this airplane. Okay, who are

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Speaker 1: you with? By the way, yeah, how old were you?

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Speaker 1: Let's I want to I want some details here. Maybe

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Speaker 1: you don't to tell the whole story. Maybe you're only

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Speaker 1: going to get part of this story, but I think

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Speaker 1: it's important. Well, and what's wild? I just got done

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Speaker 1: texting my dad about how he listens to the podcast

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Speaker 1: while he does his his biking, and I'm like, okay,

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Speaker 1: well the way this he's a cyclists. Well the way

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Speaker 1: this came about is I used to um because I

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Speaker 1: came from a divorce home, but I still would go

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Speaker 1: in between why don't you cry about it? My mother

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Speaker 1: and father's house, But I would take a plane to

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Speaker 1: see my dad because he lived in southern California. So

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Speaker 1: I was unintended minor on planes quite a bit. So

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Speaker 1: how old were you when you started jerking off on

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Speaker 1: planes regularly? Well, so this is what I was talking

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Speaker 1: about on yeah about yeah, but still as we were

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Speaker 1: talking about how like Game Pro magazines, there was a

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Speaker 1: time when like tomb Raider was the hot ship, and

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Speaker 1: like like virtual titties were like yeah, they were all

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Speaker 1: up in the buildings. So I'd been flipping through the

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Speaker 1: Game Pro and I'd see like dead or alive volleyball,

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Speaker 1: which was like this d o A remember yeah, where

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Speaker 1: it was just like fake video game titties. But it

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Speaker 1: got my young dick on whoa boy? And so once again,

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Speaker 1: how old? So it was last year We're just like,

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Speaker 1: why aren't we circling the bowl here? I know I'm

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Speaker 1: trying to get any information you're telling all the ship

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Speaker 1: that we're not asking about. Why I'm asking your eight

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Speaker 1: I like it, Blake, I like your story, Blake. I

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Speaker 1: like it too, I'm just saying he's being kg with

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Speaker 1: the details. I would probably say it was in junior high. Right,

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Speaker 1: that's probably when tomb Raador was firing and I wasn't

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Speaker 1: you know, I'm still shooting blanks. Like what if you

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Speaker 1: can find out exactly what flight it was, because there's

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Speaker 1: like records of this, Right, you were shooting blanks at

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Speaker 1: junior high, bro, you know that about me? I was

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Speaker 1: full blown loading. I was a late bloomer, guys, big

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Speaker 1: time late bloom So actually I think, like the Hentai

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Speaker 1: titties are pretty cool, but why is it that every

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Speaker 1: Hentai video, the like super hot chicks with the giant

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Speaker 1: titties also have like a monster hog cock? What is that?

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Speaker 1: There's not just one straight up? So I don't know.

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Speaker 1: I don't know Hentai very well. I apologize. I'm also

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Speaker 1: not in that world. It's like the c g I

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Speaker 1: Porno where you're like, you click on it and you

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Speaker 1: go this, this could be cool, and you're like, whoa, look,

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Speaker 1: how good the graphics have come. It's pretty hot, and

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Speaker 1: then it's just a giant vanny hog on a on

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Speaker 1: a woman and you're like, it's not really my thing?

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Speaker 1: Is there any Yeah? Well it's some people's thing, okay,

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Speaker 1: don't kink shame, Okay, but it's all of it. I'm saying,

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Speaker 1: is there a little something for the freaks like me

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Speaker 1: that's still like it? Natch natural cartoon? Well, have you

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Speaker 1: looked up Hentai woman no dick? Yeah? Have you googled

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Speaker 1: that Hentai woman no dick? That's too much. I don't

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Speaker 1: want to get I don't want to start googling. Then

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Speaker 1: you're in the weeds. Then you're a hentai guy. Okay,

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Speaker 1: you don't want to be right, I don't want to

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Speaker 1: be a hentai guy. And no, no offense to the

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Speaker 1: hentai guy. Maybe try Google and specifically what you'd like,

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Speaker 1: you know. But like then I'm like, he's an accidental

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Speaker 1: He's like, thank you Adam. Oops this video? How did

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Speaker 1: this come into the queue? I am not a familiar

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Speaker 1: What is this demon fucking a woman? Here? Let's click

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Speaker 1: on that. Yes, this is what. Here's what I'll say

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Speaker 1: about any animated pornography. It gets weird quick. It's like

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Speaker 1: a portal to bizarre stuff, you know, no king shaming,

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Speaker 1: but it gets it gets weird. It has a dark

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Speaker 1: side to it as well. Well, we can king shame, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: we can. King shames some stuf, some stuff is you know,

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Speaker 1: fucking bizarre, it's bizarre. Saying it's bizarre doesn't necessarily mean

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Speaker 1: it's shameful. It's just saying it is. Right. Let's well,

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Speaker 1: let's dissect the word bizarre. The route by that means

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Speaker 1: to Tzarre pre bizarre. Bazar was a king or as

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Speaker 1: sultan in uh mid century Russia. Right were you when

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Speaker 1: you jerked off on flights, Blake? I was, I don't

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Speaker 1: have a pinpoint day. I will try to find the

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Speaker 1: game pro and that got me going. We will. Will

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Speaker 1: you tell us about the plane, the experience, the equipment

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Speaker 1: as they call it, what the experience? What did you wait?

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Speaker 1: Was it a nighttime fly? Was this mid day? Were

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Speaker 1: you going there in the middle of the morning? Me

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Speaker 1: about like the seats situation? Who were you sitting next to?

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Speaker 1: Is this like a one seat on the other side

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Speaker 1: and two on the other because you're just flying from

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Speaker 1: l A from what airport to what? And what kind

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Speaker 1: of pants are you rock and sweatpantspants? This middle school?

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Speaker 1: You're unaccompanied? Who are you sitting next to? There's details

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Speaker 1: that are foggy, but it was not a night flight.

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Speaker 1: It was like an afternoon flight, afternoon flight, afternoon fly,

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Speaker 1: and there was a gentleman sitting next to me, but

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Speaker 1: he was sleeping. He was do you sleep, attack gentleman sleeping?

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Speaker 1: There was a gentleman sleeping. Next year, I know, I

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Speaker 1: know for damn certain you guys must have had an

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Speaker 1: instant in your teenage horny ist years that you j

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Speaker 1: owed a time or place that was inappropriate or you

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Speaker 1: just should have kept it on. Sure, Blake, we're not

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Speaker 1: talking about us. It's it's in the hundreds, if not thousands,

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Speaker 1: but we're talking about you right now. We didn't go

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Speaker 1: on another podcast to talk about it. Okay, Hey, yeah,

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Speaker 1: see we bring our dirty stories to this podcast. It

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Speaker 1: was pre this is important. So what does that mean before? Yes,

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Speaker 1: it was before we have thank you, thank you. So

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Speaker 1: you were prematurely sport I was prematurely spilling my j

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Speaker 1: O beans on another podcast. Wait, so this is so

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Speaker 1: this is but this is pre pre come or this

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Speaker 1: is pre Okay, So you just did an air pop

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Speaker 1: on an airplane. I did an air pop on an

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Speaker 1: airplane pre air pods. So we know that's the time frame. Well,

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Speaker 1: that's the best time to do something. Like that when

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Speaker 1: you're dry popping. Yeah, that's when you can get away

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Speaker 1: with it. Tell your kids, because you don't have to

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Speaker 1: clean up anything. Well, let's not let's not freeze it,

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Speaker 1: like that's what you can get away with it. No,

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Speaker 1: this is what I'm gonna tell my kids, though, And

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Speaker 1: that's why we are living in a worst time where

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Speaker 1: now children when they're alone and they're just in their

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Speaker 1: horny est state and they're just that they're jiggling on

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Speaker 1: the flight a little bit and just the bounce is

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Speaker 1: making their balls just kind of just trying to just

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Speaker 1: right just the air off the seat and the air

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Speaker 1: pressure is kind of wuck them up. And you know,

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Speaker 1: there's a stewardess there and she's a living woman, so

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Speaker 1: that's crazy. She's a walking, talking woman. And then there's

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Speaker 1: a guy who's a sleep next to you. Is that

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Speaker 1: a weird thing that turns you on for no reason?

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Speaker 1: That forearm hair, he's gonna if you're watching space jam Lola, bunny.

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Speaker 1: But nowadays everyone has a goddamn video camera in their

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Speaker 1: pocket called the cell phone, and the kids are not

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Speaker 1: safe to jerk off anymore, right, thank you. You can't

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Speaker 1: get away with nothing because what was the worst thing

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Speaker 1: that was gonna happen in the dare I say best

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Speaker 1: decade Blakey the nineties, The worst thing that was gonna

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Speaker 1: happen is that guy's gonna wake up and just see

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Speaker 1: a little froey blake just all throwed out, just yanking

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Speaker 1: his meat stick. I got a big fucking boner, right,

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Speaker 1: you know, And that would be a weird encounter. You'd land,

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Speaker 1: we'd have a laugh about it, have a laugh, he'd

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Speaker 1: tell my dad. Next Yeah, the guy next to you

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Speaker 1: definitely just gives you a nod. He's like, this is important.

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Speaker 1: This is also pre nine eleven. So he'd see my

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Speaker 1: father as soon as we got off the flight and

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Speaker 1: be like, dude, your son easy iconom looking at Lara Croft,

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Speaker 1: He's all right, all right, They all chest bump. He's

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Speaker 1: all yeah, he's alright, alright, alright, cartoon women. I guess

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Speaker 1: he's all right. I wish the stores came by and

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Speaker 1: was like, I said something like is that your peanuts?

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Speaker 1: And you thought you said peanuts and you like really

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Speaker 1: freaked out, but your peanuts are like on the ground.

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Speaker 1: Well you know, that's the greatest aventur a bit ever

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Speaker 1: where she's like peanuts, Well you can't. Don't you have it?

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Speaker 1: Where it's like it's kind of hefty, but I considered

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Speaker 1: to carry on, don't you have it? Yeah? I do

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Speaker 1: have it? So it's bulky. Carry on, it's bulky, but

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Speaker 1: I considered carry on. There it was boom, like she's

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Speaker 1: taking your trash and she's like, can I grab your nuts?

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Speaker 1: And you're like excuse me, right, and you're like the yeah,

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Speaker 1: the rapper and you're like, uh yeah, yeah, of course.

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Speaker 1: Do you mind if I lick your nuts? Um? What well?

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Speaker 1: If you're not gonna eat them, I love liking this,

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Speaker 1: the salt off them. I don't want the calories. You

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Speaker 1: mind if I suck your cock? What I mean? I

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Speaker 1: was talking to the farmer behind you. That's what you wish.

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Speaker 1: I mean, when you're a teenage boy, all you're thinking

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Speaker 1: about is the possible porno situation that could just when

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Speaker 1: you're a teenage age twenties to also also when you're

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Speaker 1: in your twenties too, right, I mean that's true. Sometimes

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Speaker 1: I have drive through interactions where I'm like, this is important.

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Speaker 1: Kyle's over there, like I'm not dead? Yeah yeah, I

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Speaker 1: mean you're like yeah, Okay, I'm allowed to imagine things

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Speaker 1: right where you're gonna take away my imagination already took

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Speaker 1: away as president. Yeah, my god, oh my god, thank

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Speaker 1: you God, thanks. You know it's crazy. We're so politically charged, guys.

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Speaker 1: I keep thinking about how charge we are. Possibly Okay, oh,

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Speaker 1: it's incredible politically drive, let's talk about it, Ross Pero,

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Speaker 1: where do we stand? Can of finish? Fish? Kind of finish?

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Speaker 1: I want to get a lizard named Newt Gingrich. What

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Speaker 1: else is funny and just political? We are? We're so

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Speaker 1: grinch who stole Christmas? The New Green stole the election. Wow,

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Speaker 1: I'm going to Chicago this weekend. Guys. Okay, that's politically hot.

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Speaker 1: Here we go, hot button issue, the windy city. What

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Speaker 1: are you gonna do there? Yeah? What's going down? I'm

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Speaker 1: gonna mostly eat hot dogs and then be with my

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Speaker 1: family to okay trip. Yeah, it's like a July fourth

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Speaker 1: get back. I haven't been to Evanston, Illinois in over

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Speaker 1: two years. Whoa, that's a long time. Wait, so it's

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Speaker 1: like summertime shy, right, haven't we heard? Like that's where

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Speaker 1: dreams are. It's going off? Okay, Basically, it seems because

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Speaker 1: I've been in this little bubble here in South Carolina,

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Speaker 1: um Charleston for three months, and here COVID has been

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Speaker 1: over for a while, but elsewhere less so so is Chicago,

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Speaker 1: like right back at it? Are they fully open? I

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Speaker 1: have friends in New York that are like, it's open,

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Speaker 1: it's open, but it's you know, it's a big city.

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Speaker 1: So like, I'm sure there could be like just a

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Speaker 1: spike and then everyone will be back throw masks on.

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Speaker 1: But you know, I feel like a lot of a

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Speaker 1: lot of people vexed throw a mask on. You can

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Speaker 1: still hit up a grocery store, or like they might

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Speaker 1: just because it's summertime, they might be like, no dining

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Speaker 1: indoors for a little bit. You know who, that's my fauci.

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Speaker 1: You're gonna you're gonna find out with me and Adam

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Speaker 1: being on the South not to get freaking politically charged,

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Speaker 1: but we're over here, do it, dude, that we can't

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Speaker 1: help it. Though we can't help it so charged politically

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Speaker 1: drives I need to know, dude, the red, the blue,

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Speaker 1: the donkeys, the elephants. For real, I guess green parties

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Speaker 1: of the bi partisan oh gosh, the birthday party, Oh

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Speaker 1: what's next to the birthday party party? Yes, that's funny.

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Speaker 1: That was on the tip of Kyle's tongue. That's my president. Okay,

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Speaker 1: thank you, Okay, we know, Blake, what were you going

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Speaker 1: to say? Seem pretty charged over there about something kind

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Speaker 1: of cool down a little bit. No, it's just like

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Speaker 1: in the South, there's so much no masking and like

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Speaker 1: nobody is really like the rules are about it. Well, no,

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Speaker 1: I'm starting to see my l A homies starting to

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Speaker 1: post this ship like, um, I don't even fucking no Delta.

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Speaker 1: I haven't watched the news Delta variant. Bro, it's political.

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Speaker 1: They like we're masking up again. I'm like, I don't

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Speaker 1: want to. I don't want to. I don't think I'm gonna.

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Speaker 1: I'm all good on did you jerk off on ADULTA flight?

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Speaker 1: That's damn right, that's the Delta. I know there's very something.

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Speaker 1: I don't know. It's just is weird having the perspective

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Speaker 1: of being like out of Los Angeles and you just

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Speaker 1: see how they really do head that ship like I

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Speaker 1: guess it comes from a good place, like let's be safe,

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Speaker 1: let's be careful, let's protect everybody, but god, damn, I

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Speaker 1: did not want to see that shipping. That's because there's

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Speaker 1: about ten million people all in a very small area. Truly. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I do believe it's about population. Blake came and visited

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Speaker 1: me this past weekend, and uh, it was great. It

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Speaker 1: was no fair. It was very very fun. We had

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Speaker 1: a blast. And this is what Blake does the night

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Speaker 1: before he's leaving. We go out, we party, we have

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Speaker 1: a great night. We drink until we closed the bar down.

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Speaker 1: It's like this bar on the beach. There's a and plane.

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Speaker 1: We were sitting out by the beach. They were serving

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Speaker 1: his drinks like well after they should have been. We're hammered.

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Speaker 1: This is the way we drive the golf cart back home.

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Speaker 1: It's good. I'm like, it's two thirty at night. I'm like, hey,

377
00:22:12,480 --> 00:22:15,240
Speaker 1: time to wind down. And Blake and I'm like, should

378
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Speaker 1: we smunk a join or something? And Blake goes, oh fuck, dude,

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Speaker 1: dog man, shit, I'm still gonna send it. And I

380
00:22:23,080 --> 00:22:26,359
Speaker 1: go what's up? And he goes, I didn't think they'd calm.

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna go, what's that now? And he goes, I

382
00:22:30,200 --> 00:22:33,760
Speaker 1: invited some people over and I got I gotta go

383
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Speaker 1: to bed, Dude, I gotta drive five hours tomorrow because

384
00:22:37,080 --> 00:22:38,800
Speaker 1: he was going to the Atlanta Hawks game. He's driving

385
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Speaker 1: from Charleston to Atlanta. And I go, what, all of

386
00:22:41,800 --> 00:22:46,600
Speaker 1: a sudden, ding dong, there's five people at three am

387
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Speaker 1: at my house. Blake goes, awesome, good to see you.

388
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Speaker 1: And I'm like, all right, I guess we'll just like

389
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Speaker 1: make our way to the backyard and sit by the

390
00:22:53,800 --> 00:22:56,040
Speaker 1: pool or whatever. And we make our way to the backyard.

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Speaker 1: All of a sudden, Blake is a ghosted us. Now

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Speaker 1: more people show up. What more, They've invited people, and

393
00:23:02,720 --> 00:23:04,720
Speaker 1: so more people are in my backyard and this is

394
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Speaker 1: your place. So now all these these are randos. No,

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Speaker 1: these aren't randos with the party through the day we've

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00:23:10,640 --> 00:23:13,040
Speaker 1: we've been partying with them and Blake knew them from

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Speaker 1: before and they were all very nice people. Okay, so

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00:23:15,720 --> 00:23:18,520
Speaker 1: they are they are acquaintances. These are not all right,

399
00:23:20,200 --> 00:23:22,960
Speaker 1: But but I had only met them this weekend. It's

400
00:23:22,960 --> 00:23:24,919
Speaker 1: not like i've I know. So it's a little much

401
00:23:24,960 --> 00:23:28,000
Speaker 1: that they know where you live. A little much. Okay, Well,

402
00:23:28,080 --> 00:23:30,600
Speaker 1: they're not locals. It wasn't even that. It was the

403
00:23:30,680 --> 00:23:34,359
Speaker 1: fact that it was three am. And now now Chloe's like, well,

404
00:23:34,440 --> 00:23:37,160
Speaker 1: I'm going to bed. It's three am. So she goes

405
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Speaker 1: to bed, and now it's just me just and I

406
00:23:40,080 --> 00:23:42,800
Speaker 1: don't I'm you know, I'm just it's now it's three am.

407
00:23:42,880 --> 00:23:44,879
Speaker 1: We're all drunk. The only thing you can do in

408
00:23:44,920 --> 00:23:50,040
Speaker 1: that situation is drained DNS. It's just it's just drink

409
00:23:50,280 --> 00:23:53,520
Speaker 1: until you've ruined. The next day, like fully ruined, Like

410
00:23:53,640 --> 00:23:55,440
Speaker 1: you go to bed at three in the three am

411
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Speaker 1: hour you got, you can save her the next day,

412
00:23:58,160 --> 00:24:03,240
Speaker 1: but five six am, you're fucked. Were they politically charged

413
00:24:03,400 --> 00:24:07,160
Speaker 1: or just regular people? Dude, there wasn't that much charged nous.

414
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Speaker 1: And I think that's why I wasn't willing to stay

415
00:24:09,800 --> 00:24:12,600
Speaker 1: up until six or seven. It's tough sometimes when you

416
00:24:12,680 --> 00:24:14,800
Speaker 1: get in a good conversation, it's like going back and

417
00:24:14,920 --> 00:24:18,920
Speaker 1: forth politically, like the time just flies. You know, just

418
00:24:20,040 --> 00:24:22,639
Speaker 1: what's the line you threw out? Did you say, like,

419
00:24:23,400 --> 00:24:25,639
Speaker 1: you know, guys, I'm gonna I'm gonna call it and

420
00:24:25,720 --> 00:24:28,680
Speaker 1: then everyone's like okay, or you just know I went

421
00:24:28,800 --> 00:24:32,200
Speaker 1: the opposite I went the opposite way. I was like

422
00:24:32,320 --> 00:24:35,199
Speaker 1: trying to clear clean my I have a whole fridge

423
00:24:35,280 --> 00:24:37,840
Speaker 1: that's just beer. It's stopped. I was like, maybe we

424
00:24:37,960 --> 00:24:40,760
Speaker 1: try to finish this motherfucker. Like I was like, we're

425
00:24:40,840 --> 00:24:44,040
Speaker 1: going for yeah. I was like, what's the task at hand?

426
00:24:44,080 --> 00:24:46,000
Speaker 1: And then they got to like five am, and then

427
00:24:46,040 --> 00:24:48,159
Speaker 1: I think they were like, Okay, he's going harder than

428
00:24:48,280 --> 00:24:51,800
Speaker 1: we want to go. Right, We're Bailey and somehow these

429
00:24:52,000 --> 00:24:55,200
Speaker 1: there's not a in Charleston. The ubers are like damn

430
00:24:55,280 --> 00:25:00,400
Speaker 1: near possible. Somehow they got an uber at five thirty

431
00:25:00,480 --> 00:25:03,160
Speaker 1: am to come pick them up and they're like, oh good,

432
00:25:03,200 --> 00:25:05,879
Speaker 1: this this super came. We had a few that that

433
00:25:06,000 --> 00:25:07,680
Speaker 1: did cancel all of a sudden. I'm like, if you

434
00:25:07,720 --> 00:25:12,080
Speaker 1: guys want to beer for the road? Yeah, I was going.

435
00:25:12,240 --> 00:25:13,920
Speaker 1: And then the next day I go to like clean

436
00:25:14,000 --> 00:25:16,600
Speaker 1: up all the beers. I'm handing them so many different beers.

437
00:25:16,640 --> 00:25:21,280
Speaker 1: I'm handing them a bunch of Ashley and one. I'm

438
00:25:21,359 --> 00:25:24,399
Speaker 1: handing them all like the course lights everything, and there

439
00:25:24,480 --> 00:25:27,560
Speaker 1: was like everybody drank like five SIPs of each beer.

440
00:25:28,160 --> 00:25:30,360
Speaker 1: You know, they were just all full. Yeah, there, every

441
00:25:30,480 --> 00:25:33,280
Speaker 1: everything was full because they were just like sipping and

442
00:25:33,359 --> 00:25:37,680
Speaker 1: meanwhile I'm like crushing, going like another round, and they're like, oh,

443
00:25:37,800 --> 00:25:41,520
Speaker 1: we're good. It sounds like you were being a great. Huh, Yeah,

444
00:25:41,560 --> 00:25:44,160
Speaker 1: I was. This doesn't sound like a bad thing. Yeah,

445
00:25:44,240 --> 00:25:46,680
Speaker 1: it's cool that you went like really hard, you went

446
00:25:46,800 --> 00:25:49,600
Speaker 1: great in the situation. Yeah, I did know it worked out.

447
00:25:49,640 --> 00:25:51,679
Speaker 1: But I'm saying I love that me and Blake are

448
00:25:51,720 --> 00:25:55,640
Speaker 1: close enough that he felt comfortable leaving me in that situation. Now, Blake,

449
00:25:55,720 --> 00:25:57,760
Speaker 1: what's your perspective on the situation? How did you? How

450
00:25:57,840 --> 00:26:01,199
Speaker 1: did this? What you do? I mean, that's that's about right.

451
00:26:01,280 --> 00:26:03,240
Speaker 1: I mean I threw out the bat signal to the

452
00:26:03,320 --> 00:26:06,359
Speaker 1: homies we were partying with earlier, like earlier in the night.

453
00:26:06,400 --> 00:26:08,440
Speaker 1: I'm like, hey, we're out at these bars, these bars,

454
00:26:08,760 --> 00:26:10,880
Speaker 1: and then I guess I was like, we're gonna head

455
00:26:10,880 --> 00:26:13,639
Speaker 1: to Adams. But they didn't get out there until I

456
00:26:13,800 --> 00:26:16,800
Speaker 1: was like, my head has to hit the pillow because

457
00:26:17,000 --> 00:26:19,440
Speaker 1: I had to drive all the way back to Atlanta,

458
00:26:19,680 --> 00:26:21,800
Speaker 1: and if I would have gone to bed at five,

459
00:26:21,880 --> 00:26:24,480
Speaker 1: I would have died on the drive for sure. Yeah.

460
00:26:24,520 --> 00:26:26,720
Speaker 1: It was. It was a really rough. It was a

461
00:26:26,760 --> 00:26:29,760
Speaker 1: really rough next day, How far has that drive? Five hours? Yeah?

462
00:26:29,880 --> 00:26:32,639
Speaker 1: Five hours? I got I was talking to my homies

463
00:26:32,680 --> 00:26:34,760
Speaker 1: other day and they brought back a story of when

464
00:26:34,800 --> 00:26:38,960
Speaker 1: they were driving back from Madison to Chicago, mass in Wisconsin, Chicago,

465
00:26:39,200 --> 00:26:44,960
Speaker 1: they pulled Illinois. What Illinois, Chicago? Illinois's correct? Yes, Okay,

466
00:26:44,960 --> 00:26:48,040
Speaker 1: I was just gonna get political, dude, I'm charged. They

467
00:26:48,119 --> 00:26:50,600
Speaker 1: were so hungover they just pulled over on the side

468
00:26:50,640 --> 00:26:52,920
Speaker 1: of the freeway and went to sleep in like the

469
00:26:53,080 --> 00:26:55,639
Speaker 1: ditch for like an hour and a half. Dude, the

470
00:26:55,800 --> 00:26:59,400
Speaker 1: thought crossed my mind. I was so close to doing

471
00:26:59,440 --> 00:27:02,000
Speaker 1: because they were like, I can't. I'm gonna bar I'm

472
00:27:02,000 --> 00:27:04,560
Speaker 1: gonna I'm gonna crash. Let's just pass that. That's how

473
00:27:04,760 --> 00:27:07,719
Speaker 1: MJ's dad was murdered. You can't do that. That's right.

474
00:27:08,240 --> 00:27:10,000
Speaker 1: You can't do that. No, not on the side of

475
00:27:10,040 --> 00:27:12,240
Speaker 1: the road. No, they didn't. They were in in the car.

476
00:27:12,440 --> 00:27:15,040
Speaker 1: They went like to sleep in the grass, so even

477
00:27:15,160 --> 00:27:22,600
Speaker 1: safer amongst the snakes. How crazy is That's insane? You

478
00:27:22,640 --> 00:27:24,600
Speaker 1: could have done that. Yeah. But the thing is this

479
00:27:24,800 --> 00:27:28,719
Speaker 1: is forty old, was getting older. We're making we need

480
00:27:28,760 --> 00:27:31,280
Speaker 1: to be making a little bit better decisions. I mean,

481
00:27:31,320 --> 00:27:35,720
Speaker 1: I remember back in the day, we mean Austin Anderson,

482
00:27:35,960 --> 00:27:38,920
Speaker 1: friend of the Pods. We would drive up to Santa

483
00:27:39,000 --> 00:27:41,400
Speaker 1: Barbara when we were like eighteen years old, and we'd

484
00:27:41,440 --> 00:27:43,920
Speaker 1: go to Santa Barbara, and then we'd walk around and

485
00:27:44,040 --> 00:27:46,320
Speaker 1: look for open houses and meet the kids that were

486
00:27:46,359 --> 00:27:49,720
Speaker 1: renting their rooms, like on what is that main drag

487
00:27:49,760 --> 00:27:53,280
Speaker 1: called like playa vista, I think, and would go and

488
00:27:53,480 --> 00:27:56,760
Speaker 1: be like interested in like renting a room, and then

489
00:27:56,880 --> 00:27:59,480
Speaker 1: would be like, well, what are you guys doing tonight?

490
00:27:59,520 --> 00:28:01,880
Speaker 1: Maybe we should a party and see our future roommates

491
00:28:02,520 --> 00:28:06,520
Speaker 1: and high speed bro ban and then everyone had parties.

492
00:28:06,560 --> 00:28:11,439
Speaker 1: So we did that like five different places, get all

493
00:28:11,480 --> 00:28:14,000
Speaker 1: these people's numbers, and then at that night we would

494
00:28:14,040 --> 00:28:16,320
Speaker 1: just like call each one and be like what are

495
00:28:16,320 --> 00:28:17,800
Speaker 1: you guys doing? And they're like, I made us at

496
00:28:17,840 --> 00:28:20,360
Speaker 1: this party. These guys might rent a room. We had

497
00:28:20,400 --> 00:28:23,119
Speaker 1: no We just wanted to go party, and why did

498
00:28:23,160 --> 00:28:24,840
Speaker 1: you want to do that up in Santa Barbara as

499
00:28:24,880 --> 00:28:26,760
Speaker 1: opposed to where you guys were in college because it

500
00:28:26,880 --> 00:28:28,520
Speaker 1: was a fun thing. It was a fun thing to

501
00:28:28,600 --> 00:28:31,200
Speaker 1: go do because we hadn't experienced Santa Barbara yet, so

502
00:28:31,280 --> 00:28:33,560
Speaker 1: we were just like, let's go up and then we

503
00:28:33,800 --> 00:28:36,840
Speaker 1: would end up. We did this like three times and

504
00:28:36,920 --> 00:28:38,920
Speaker 1: we ended up. Would you crash at their houses? We

505
00:28:39,240 --> 00:28:42,280
Speaker 1: we did twice and one time this is what kind

506
00:28:42,320 --> 00:28:46,720
Speaker 1: of perculated his memory was. Once I tried to sleep

507
00:28:46,920 --> 00:28:49,080
Speaker 1: in the car with Austin, Like we just pulled over

508
00:28:49,160 --> 00:28:51,360
Speaker 1: on the side of the road and just started to sleep,

509
00:28:51,520 --> 00:28:54,440
Speaker 1: and he was snoring so loudly that I just slept

510
00:28:54,640 --> 00:28:58,520
Speaker 1: in the yard next to the car. The car, and

511
00:28:58,640 --> 00:29:01,920
Speaker 1: I remember like just people were like, I remember just

512
00:29:02,120 --> 00:29:04,880
Speaker 1: a girl was jogging at like six thirty in the morning,

513
00:29:04,920 --> 00:29:09,800
Speaker 1: and I'm like, Jesus Christ just rocked. You just roll

514
00:29:09,880 --> 00:29:11,640
Speaker 1: over and start doing push ups, and you're like, you

515
00:29:11,720 --> 00:29:14,800
Speaker 1: gotta get after it. I'm a right, yeah, and just

516
00:29:14,880 --> 00:29:18,680
Speaker 1: seemed to get the word I do push ups at

517
00:29:18,760 --> 00:29:20,640
Speaker 1: my own puke. There was a time when I was

518
00:29:20,760 --> 00:29:23,760
Speaker 1: so drunk and I drove down to Orange County from

519
00:29:23,960 --> 00:29:28,280
Speaker 1: l a goodbye, allegedly drove down to see Blake at

520
00:29:28,320 --> 00:29:31,800
Speaker 1: his father's house. Uh, And I was so wasted, and

521
00:29:31,840 --> 00:29:34,360
Speaker 1: I think I did some cocaine that night and then

522
00:29:36,080 --> 00:29:39,080
Speaker 1: made phone calls. I remember making phone calls the whole

523
00:29:39,160 --> 00:29:42,440
Speaker 1: way down and then finding a beach and then sleeping

524
00:29:42,520 --> 00:29:45,760
Speaker 1: on the beach. And this is when the listeners go, Yep,

525
00:29:45,960 --> 00:29:50,160
Speaker 1: that's why he's the sober friend. Dude. I slept on

526
00:29:50,240 --> 00:29:52,640
Speaker 1: the beach and woke up at eleven a m. And

527
00:29:52,680 --> 00:29:56,560
Speaker 1: there was a volleyball game happening like over me. That's amazing.

528
00:29:57,040 --> 00:30:01,640
Speaker 1: You need a fourth man, super sunburned dude. I was

529
00:30:01,760 --> 00:30:05,160
Speaker 1: fully jeane jacketed out too, Like I was fully I

530
00:30:05,160 --> 00:30:08,280
Speaker 1: had Jeane jacket on, sunglasses, pants, and just like I

531
00:30:08,320 --> 00:30:10,920
Speaker 1: bet you had a really sick trucker hat during that

532
00:30:11,080 --> 00:30:13,440
Speaker 1: time too. I remember, I remember that. I feel like

533
00:30:13,520 --> 00:30:16,560
Speaker 1: there's a detail you're missing. What's the detail? Did you

534
00:30:16,720 --> 00:30:20,320
Speaker 1: not have like a fake silver grill in your mouth

535
00:30:20,480 --> 00:30:24,880
Speaker 1: like teeth? Yeah? Probably due probably like you might have

536
00:30:24,960 --> 00:30:27,040
Speaker 1: woke up with some fake like a fake grill in

537
00:30:27,080 --> 00:30:29,280
Speaker 1: your mouth. Do you think they thought you washed up

538
00:30:29,280 --> 00:30:31,959
Speaker 1: from the shore? I thought you were a pirate, Oh

539
00:30:32,080 --> 00:30:35,200
Speaker 1: my god, a pirate from another time. It's a shipwrecked

540
00:30:35,320 --> 00:30:41,200
Speaker 1: man man ship. It's a dirty brown water pirate. Don't

541
00:30:41,240 --> 00:30:46,000
Speaker 1: touch it. Pre Carl from workoholic. So there's no explanation

542
00:30:46,040 --> 00:30:49,600
Speaker 1: other than you were an insane Captain Jack Sparrow probably

543
00:30:49,720 --> 00:30:53,320
Speaker 1: pre Captain Jack. Yeah. I feel like when we were younger,

544
00:30:53,480 --> 00:30:57,000
Speaker 1: we were just more um willing to sleep places that

545
00:30:57,440 --> 00:31:01,280
Speaker 1: that weren't reliable. Yeahah yeah. You don't run the numbers

546
00:31:01,320 --> 00:31:03,640
Speaker 1: in your head of survival. You just go yeah, I'm

547
00:31:03,640 --> 00:31:06,280
Speaker 1: gonna go to bed right here. I'm betting that in

548
00:31:06,360 --> 00:31:09,040
Speaker 1: the Ozarks, I'm just gonna find a corner of wherever

549
00:31:09,120 --> 00:31:10,880
Speaker 1: we're sleeping, and I'm just gonna do the hands in

550
00:31:10,920 --> 00:31:13,440
Speaker 1: the armpits, just laying on the glory on the floor

551
00:31:13,520 --> 00:31:16,520
Speaker 1: style for you. That's it. I'm gonna just sleep in

552
00:31:16,560 --> 00:31:19,640
Speaker 1: a little owl's house, in a tree, fold up in

553
00:31:19,680 --> 00:31:23,200
Speaker 1: a little ball. Oh Adam doesn't like owls at the batch.

554
00:31:23,280 --> 00:31:25,520
Speaker 1: Sleeping at a bachelor party is honestly the hardest thing

555
00:31:25,600 --> 00:31:28,240
Speaker 1: to get accomplished. Like you, you don't have a room,

556
00:31:28,360 --> 00:31:30,760
Speaker 1: you don't have anything. There's you don't think about that

557
00:31:30,880 --> 00:31:34,200
Speaker 1: when planning the bachelor party and then like twenty people

558
00:31:35,480 --> 00:31:37,600
Speaker 1: on this house and you're like, what then are we doing?

559
00:31:37,720 --> 00:31:40,440
Speaker 1: I love the dude and the bachelor party emails, there's

560
00:31:40,520 --> 00:31:43,960
Speaker 1: like yeah, but for real though the bed situation, what's

561
00:31:43,960 --> 00:31:49,120
Speaker 1: the No. Eight It's a free for all? When you

562
00:31:49,200 --> 00:31:53,320
Speaker 1: get the bachelor party email chains are the funniest thing

563
00:31:53,400 --> 00:31:55,800
Speaker 1: because it's just it will be a free for all.

564
00:31:55,880 --> 00:31:59,680
Speaker 1: There is there is no special treatment. Whoever gets there,

565
00:32:00,000 --> 00:32:03,400
Speaker 1: whoever gets off that bus or whatever. We're using to

566
00:32:03,440 --> 00:32:06,720
Speaker 1: pick all you guys up first and gets into the rooms.

567
00:32:07,840 --> 00:32:10,920
Speaker 1: That's yours mine, it's yours. But but Adam, what you're

568
00:32:10,920 --> 00:32:14,720
Speaker 1: saying makes sense. But bachelor parties don't make sense because

569
00:32:14,800 --> 00:32:17,680
Speaker 1: somebody's gonna knock out early and be in your bed

570
00:32:17,760 --> 00:32:20,520
Speaker 1: and you're gonna be like, right, and that's when you throw.

571
00:32:20,560 --> 00:32:23,280
Speaker 1: If you throw a piece of pizza up my asshole,

572
00:32:24,280 --> 00:32:28,520
Speaker 1: I'm gonna gona kill you at your bachelor party. But yeah,

573
00:32:28,640 --> 00:32:31,160
Speaker 1: but that would be good for the pod man. You

574
00:32:31,280 --> 00:32:33,960
Speaker 1: gotta do it for the pod that's true. We're gonna

575
00:32:34,040 --> 00:32:38,640
Speaker 1: live stream the entire thing for the pod man that

576
00:32:38,880 --> 00:32:40,960
Speaker 1: it's important. Maybe I'll get like a fucking tent or

577
00:32:41,040 --> 00:32:43,760
Speaker 1: something and just like plan on going outside. Yeah, that

578
00:32:43,840 --> 00:32:45,760
Speaker 1: could be cool. Maybe that's the movie you think nobody's

579
00:32:45,760 --> 00:32:48,080
Speaker 1: gonna be in that tent. I'm gonna funk with you. Bro.

580
00:32:48,280 --> 00:32:51,360
Speaker 1: If you're in a tent, talk, there'll be We're cuddling,

581
00:32:51,400 --> 00:32:53,600
Speaker 1: We're keeping each other warmed. What are you talking about.

582
00:32:55,800 --> 00:33:01,040
Speaker 1: There's something's going to happen in that tent. I'm excited

583
00:33:01,160 --> 00:33:05,360
Speaker 1: for what goes down in the ten d like one

584
00:33:05,360 --> 00:33:07,520
Speaker 1: of those hammocks, like a pocket hammock or something. That's

585
00:33:07,520 --> 00:33:09,920
Speaker 1: probably that's a good move. Yeah, those hammocks that are

586
00:33:09,960 --> 00:33:14,040
Speaker 1: like nylon. Right, Oh yeah, yeah, I'm yeah, five guys

587
00:33:14,080 --> 00:33:17,960
Speaker 1: will definitely piss on you. Just kick me, just fucking

588
00:33:18,120 --> 00:33:20,680
Speaker 1: kick me and try to swing me around. And five

589
00:33:20,880 --> 00:33:24,600
Speaker 1: late thirties, damn near forty year old. I like to

590
00:33:24,680 --> 00:33:29,760
Speaker 1: practice my my drop kicks on the dude in the hammock. Yeah, looking,

591
00:33:30,040 --> 00:33:33,040
Speaker 1: I'll be sleeping in here. There's a pile of shipping here. Huh. Okay,

592
00:33:33,080 --> 00:33:36,040
Speaker 1: all right, I guess I will be sleeping somewhere else. Yeah,

593
00:33:36,200 --> 00:33:42,720
Speaker 1: let's drop kick oak hammocks. Ruined Okay, a ruined tried

594
00:33:42,760 --> 00:33:48,320
Speaker 1: to go to bed at nine o'clock. Dude, fucking tired, bro,

595
00:33:48,720 --> 00:33:50,240
Speaker 1: I'm just bringing a pill I think I'm gonna bring

596
00:33:50,320 --> 00:33:53,040
Speaker 1: like a little camping pillow. It's all I dude, hands

597
00:33:53,040 --> 00:33:56,520
Speaker 1: and armpits passing. Well, Blake just stayed here with me

598
00:33:56,720 --> 00:34:00,640
Speaker 1: this past weekend, and he didn't undo the covers, didn't

599
00:34:00,680 --> 00:34:04,240
Speaker 1: get under the covers. He's a monster. He slept on

600
00:34:04,400 --> 00:34:06,760
Speaker 1: top of the covers. And it also doesn't even look

601
00:34:06,800 --> 00:34:11,719
Speaker 1: like he used a pillow. Well, yeah, he didn't get

602
00:34:11,840 --> 00:34:13,879
Speaker 1: under the covers, and it seemed like he went out

603
00:34:13,920 --> 00:34:16,400
Speaker 1: of the way to not use pillows. But this is

604
00:34:16,480 --> 00:34:18,759
Speaker 1: the same dude who in hotels will not sleep on

605
00:34:18,840 --> 00:34:20,880
Speaker 1: the bed. He'll just sleep on the floor with like

606
00:34:21,239 --> 00:34:24,839
Speaker 1: the comforter. Oh yeah, what the fund is that he'll

607
00:34:24,840 --> 00:34:28,719
Speaker 1: sleep on the floor next to the bed, Like he's

608
00:34:28,760 --> 00:34:31,360
Speaker 1: the weirdest guy. I know. The fact that he just

609
00:34:31,520 --> 00:34:34,719
Speaker 1: invited a bunch of people over the three yeah, then

610
00:34:34,880 --> 00:34:39,279
Speaker 1: goes to bed, then doesn't go underneath the covers. Very nice,

611
00:34:39,360 --> 00:34:42,320
Speaker 1: it's a very nice house. These guest rooms are are great.

612
00:34:42,560 --> 00:34:44,799
Speaker 1: I could see if this is like a dorm room

613
00:34:44,920 --> 00:34:46,960
Speaker 1: or something and you're laying I don't know, there might

614
00:34:47,000 --> 00:34:48,560
Speaker 1: be all kinds of weird ship underneath. Here. Was like,

615
00:34:48,600 --> 00:34:52,080
Speaker 1: these are linen's, like you could have slept with linen.

616
00:34:52,160 --> 00:34:55,000
Speaker 1: These are linens and things. Honestly, I think in my

617
00:34:55,200 --> 00:34:58,040
Speaker 1: mind I don't do it because I get hot easily

618
00:34:58,080 --> 00:35:01,000
Speaker 1: when I sleep, so I just sleep on hot. Yeah.

619
00:35:01,120 --> 00:35:03,759
Speaker 1: We also first night explained to him how the thermostatic

620
00:35:03,800 --> 00:35:06,000
Speaker 1: upstairs worked. I was like, this as yours, so you

621
00:35:06,080 --> 00:35:08,000
Speaker 1: can do it whatever. If you like it really cool,

622
00:35:08,080 --> 00:35:09,600
Speaker 1: you can just put it really cold. And he's like,

623
00:35:10,040 --> 00:35:13,400
Speaker 1: right on, but did not touch the terms that slept

624
00:35:13,440 --> 00:35:17,279
Speaker 1: on top of the covers though, in this close in

625
00:35:17,480 --> 00:35:20,160
Speaker 1: his clothes. For sure. I didn't feel down. It just

626
00:35:20,280 --> 00:35:23,400
Speaker 1: didn't get comfortable, Like, didn't even try to get comfortable.

627
00:35:23,480 --> 00:35:26,239
Speaker 1: What's up with that? I can't do that. I run hot,

628
00:35:26,360 --> 00:35:29,759
Speaker 1: I gotta get the clothes off. I mean I was exhausted.

629
00:35:30,280 --> 00:35:33,120
Speaker 1: I was done. Yeah, we were going hard, man, Yeah

630
00:35:33,200 --> 00:35:35,680
Speaker 1: we went. Always sleep better under the covers, man, It's true,

631
00:35:36,040 --> 00:35:38,359
Speaker 1: like in a nice, cool room. I don't know why

632
00:35:38,440 --> 00:35:41,719
Speaker 1: I was so sorry. Yes, sleep on the floor. I

633
00:35:41,800 --> 00:35:44,560
Speaker 1: slepped in my jeans on top of the bed. Dude.

634
00:35:44,600 --> 00:35:47,200
Speaker 1: The more I think, like that weird drunk sleep where

635
00:35:47,239 --> 00:35:50,640
Speaker 1: you're you're not awake, but you wake up like you

636
00:35:50,719 --> 00:35:53,719
Speaker 1: didn't sleep at all. It's called alcohol poison and you're

637
00:35:53,719 --> 00:35:58,279
Speaker 1: almost dead. You know that weird sleep necessarily but you

638
00:35:58,320 --> 00:35:59,920
Speaker 1: can't move in the room. Is spending? You know that

639
00:36:00,120 --> 00:36:07,600
Speaker 1: sleep paralysis with the grim Reaper visits you. You know that, Yeah,

640
00:36:07,680 --> 00:36:11,279
Speaker 1: we know, we know. Well, we had a lot of

641
00:36:11,320 --> 00:36:14,520
Speaker 1: fun this weekend, that's all say. I will say that

642
00:36:14,640 --> 00:36:17,160
Speaker 1: it took like so long to not be drunk for

643
00:36:17,280 --> 00:36:19,759
Speaker 1: me that next day. Like, I understand why you had

644
00:36:19,840 --> 00:36:22,920
Speaker 1: to stop drinking, because you drink until five six am.

645
00:36:23,680 --> 00:36:25,879
Speaker 1: You would have been drunk for part of that drive home.

646
00:36:26,200 --> 00:36:29,080
Speaker 1: And you don't want to do that, you know, I

647
00:36:29,239 --> 00:36:32,000
Speaker 1: was making the responsible choice by going to bed at

648
00:36:32,080 --> 00:36:34,880
Speaker 1: three in the morning. Yes, would you even breakfast before

649
00:36:34,920 --> 00:36:38,000
Speaker 1: you left? How did you get your mind right? He didn't.

650
00:36:38,040 --> 00:36:40,479
Speaker 1: He didn't even grab coffee. We have coffee here. Would

651
00:36:40,480 --> 00:36:42,200
Speaker 1: you do for five hours? You hit a gas station?

652
00:36:42,239 --> 00:36:44,360
Speaker 1: I called him like like a half hour into his

653
00:36:44,480 --> 00:36:46,359
Speaker 1: drive when I woke up, He's like, yeah, I left

654
00:36:46,400 --> 00:36:47,839
Speaker 1: like a half hour for five minutes ago. So I'm

655
00:36:47,840 --> 00:36:50,320
Speaker 1: like a and I'm like, oh, cool, you get it.

656
00:36:50,440 --> 00:36:52,040
Speaker 1: You get anything to eat here? And he goes, no,

657
00:36:52,239 --> 00:36:55,920
Speaker 1: I really could use a coffee or something, though, Like

658
00:36:56,360 --> 00:36:58,680
Speaker 1: you didn't stop to get yourself something. He's like, no,

659
00:36:59,000 --> 00:37:03,560
Speaker 1: even before you left house leaves, no trays this you don't.

660
00:37:03,840 --> 00:37:07,440
Speaker 1: You don't know where he's been, where he's going. It's

661
00:37:07,520 --> 00:37:12,080
Speaker 1: not malicious, dude, I just don't think about it. You're

662
00:37:12,160 --> 00:37:15,800
Speaker 1: a stupid dumb aff It's wild though, Like I forgot

663
00:37:15,880 --> 00:37:18,239
Speaker 1: to eat last week. Yeah, there's a kitchen there, there's

664
00:37:18,280 --> 00:37:20,919
Speaker 1: coffee pods right there. God, it would be nice. Look,

665
00:37:20,960 --> 00:37:23,320
Speaker 1: I had like half a can of Coke zero in

666
00:37:23,400 --> 00:37:27,160
Speaker 1: the car from the day before, so I kind of

667
00:37:27,200 --> 00:37:30,279
Speaker 1: weaned off of that. So you're good to go. You're

668
00:37:30,320 --> 00:37:32,000
Speaker 1: good to go. Wait, so when you went to the

669
00:37:32,040 --> 00:37:34,080
Speaker 1: gas station because it's a five hour drive, you gotta go.

670
00:37:35,280 --> 00:37:40,480
Speaker 1: You ain't go inside and just get like a get

671
00:37:40,520 --> 00:37:44,840
Speaker 1: a game. Stop game. Yeah, Blake, we've established you like

672
00:37:44,920 --> 00:37:49,520
Speaker 1: to jerk off. You weird scenarios. Did you kick it

673
00:37:49,560 --> 00:37:53,120
Speaker 1: in the car? Did you did you do it? I'm reformed, man.

674
00:37:53,280 --> 00:37:55,440
Speaker 1: That's not how That's not how I get down anymore.

675
00:37:55,520 --> 00:37:57,800
Speaker 1: That was junior high. It's not how you are anymore.

676
00:37:57,960 --> 00:38:01,080
Speaker 1: You didn't get like Derito's or like a fucking twigs

677
00:38:01,760 --> 00:38:06,040
Speaker 1: or Skittles, Skittles. I would have loved the twigs. I

678
00:38:06,040 --> 00:38:08,440
Speaker 1: would have loved skittles. Those would have been delicious. But

679
00:38:08,719 --> 00:38:12,640
Speaker 1: here's to punch. I was headed straight for the Atlanta

680
00:38:12,760 --> 00:38:15,400
Speaker 1: Hawks game, and we had a box where there was

681
00:38:15,480 --> 00:38:18,839
Speaker 1: a hole, like going to be a whole buffet five

682
00:38:18,920 --> 00:38:22,799
Speaker 1: hours later after drinking all day and all night. That's

683
00:38:22,800 --> 00:38:24,640
Speaker 1: why your natural hard parts. Were you able to stop

684
00:38:24,719 --> 00:38:26,440
Speaker 1: and like clean up or anything, or did you just

685
00:38:26,520 --> 00:38:28,000
Speaker 1: go straight? Fair? You know what I would have done.

686
00:38:28,040 --> 00:38:31,960
Speaker 1: I would have stopped at a diner by myself. H Yeah,

687
00:38:32,120 --> 00:38:34,839
Speaker 1: I would have gotten a weird Like what's great about

688
00:38:34,880 --> 00:38:37,080
Speaker 1: the South is you're driving on these bad country runs

689
00:38:37,160 --> 00:38:41,920
Speaker 1: and there's just like a legit old school rons on

690
00:38:42,040 --> 00:38:45,560
Speaker 1: the back country roads, and there's like legit old school

691
00:38:45,680 --> 00:38:49,000
Speaker 1: cute diners. Every momn loves cute diner. You could have

692
00:38:49,040 --> 00:38:52,400
Speaker 1: just stopped at one of them, had yourself a pancake

693
00:38:52,560 --> 00:38:56,440
Speaker 1: and egg, had a few cups of coffee Southern Slam,

694
00:38:56,760 --> 00:38:59,480
Speaker 1: just some biscuits and graz and then and then got

695
00:38:59,520 --> 00:39:02,360
Speaker 1: on the Oh dude, I know. I will say, like

696
00:39:03,520 --> 00:39:05,640
Speaker 1: what he did is he didn't stop, He didn't drink

697
00:39:05,680 --> 00:39:09,440
Speaker 1: a one drink of water. He just just white knuckled

698
00:39:09,480 --> 00:39:12,920
Speaker 1: it for five hours straight until he was at the

699
00:39:13,000 --> 00:39:15,800
Speaker 1: Atlanta Hawks. Well, because I will say that on the

700
00:39:15,960 --> 00:39:20,000
Speaker 1: drive up to you in South Carolina, I did like

701
00:39:20,239 --> 00:39:22,239
Speaker 1: stop off to go to like a truck stop like, oh,

702
00:39:22,360 --> 00:39:24,439
Speaker 1: this will be cute, this little diner or whatever. There's

703
00:39:24,440 --> 00:39:27,520
Speaker 1: a big sign. I pulled up and it just kind

704
00:39:27,560 --> 00:39:29,960
Speaker 1: of wasn't cute at all. It felt kind of backwards

705
00:39:30,040 --> 00:39:32,320
Speaker 1: to me. So I'm like, no, I'm gonna go. And

706
00:39:32,400 --> 00:39:34,279
Speaker 1: then but that's the cool ship. Dude. You gotta get

707
00:39:34,280 --> 00:39:37,200
Speaker 1: a little backwards. You look like you act like I

708
00:39:37,280 --> 00:39:39,439
Speaker 1: know you don't think you fit in, But with that hair, dude,

709
00:39:39,880 --> 00:39:41,719
Speaker 1: you fit in. I don't know. I didn't see a

710
00:39:41,800 --> 00:39:44,399
Speaker 1: lot of long hairs out our way. No, no, no, no, yeah,

711
00:39:44,560 --> 00:39:46,960
Speaker 1: I've seen Easy Rider. Have you seen Easy Rider? They

712
00:39:47,000 --> 00:39:49,160
Speaker 1: get smoked just for being long hairs in that movie

713
00:39:49,640 --> 00:39:56,640
Speaker 1: that was, Oh yeah, fucking Easy Rider. That ship's troublesome

714
00:39:57,840 --> 00:40:03,560
Speaker 1: again half century ago. Oh ship, that ship that did

715
00:40:03,719 --> 00:40:08,359
Speaker 1: happen in a movie fifty years is trouble But here's

716
00:40:08,360 --> 00:40:11,120
Speaker 1: what I'm thinking. Here's what I'm thinking. So you got

717
00:40:11,200 --> 00:40:12,960
Speaker 1: to the game. You went straight to the game, as

718
00:40:13,040 --> 00:40:17,960
Speaker 1: we've established, no shower, no wipe your nuts, nothing, right, No,

719
00:40:18,239 --> 00:40:21,560
Speaker 1: he changed clothes. Blake is a cleanly man. He did that. Yeah.

720
00:40:21,920 --> 00:40:28,560
Speaker 1: But as far as you get there, you didn't eat first? Well,

721
00:40:28,920 --> 00:40:32,719
Speaker 1: oh good, you had a beer before you ate anything? Right, Absolutely.

722
00:40:32,760 --> 00:40:35,000
Speaker 1: I got out of Niccolo Vultra they were free. And

723
00:40:35,080 --> 00:40:37,879
Speaker 1: then what did you eat? Well? They had a nice bread.

724
00:40:37,880 --> 00:40:40,920
Speaker 1: I had two hot dogs. I had two slices of pizza,

725
00:40:41,400 --> 00:40:44,320
Speaker 1: had some chicken, had some cold slaw. I had a salad.

726
00:40:44,640 --> 00:40:47,960
Speaker 1: And then, hey, when you heard the dribbling in those balls,

727
00:40:48,040 --> 00:40:50,000
Speaker 1: did it get something inside of you just couldn't go

728
00:40:50,600 --> 00:40:55,279
Speaker 1: that you had to dip off from the pathroom. No,

729
00:40:55,520 --> 00:40:57,080
Speaker 1: I don't go to the bat. I was just in

730
00:40:57,239 --> 00:40:59,640
Speaker 1: the box with everybody else. I just threw like one

731
00:40:59,719 --> 00:41:02,160
Speaker 1: of the free T shirts over my lap and then

732
00:41:02,280 --> 00:41:05,080
Speaker 1: he didn't get it done. Dude. Yeah, everybody's like, why

733
00:41:05,200 --> 00:41:08,120
Speaker 1: is he going to ape over the free T shirt?

734
00:41:08,760 --> 00:41:13,000
Speaker 1: Like me? Readier, me, me, me. They're like, I guess

735
00:41:13,800 --> 00:41:16,320
Speaker 1: Blake really wants this pretty shirt? Here you go, buddy,

736
00:41:18,640 --> 00:41:22,400
Speaker 1: Can I get another one? Oh? Yes, yes, let me

737
00:41:22,440 --> 00:41:24,799
Speaker 1: get a couple over here. Dude, I don't know. Yeah,

738
00:41:24,800 --> 00:41:26,920
Speaker 1: he just piled him out his lap and sits right there.

739
00:41:27,000 --> 00:41:31,640
Speaker 1: It's like it's a joke. Keep sending him. It's funnier

740
00:41:31,680 --> 00:41:41,480
Speaker 1: the more I get, it's funnier. I jerked off in

741
00:41:41,560 --> 00:41:48,759
Speaker 1: at t J Max Wants and this wasn't, Dagne. I

742
00:41:48,800 --> 00:41:50,879
Speaker 1: think we might be a little premature on the ending.

743
00:41:51,719 --> 00:41:54,200
Speaker 1: Wait did you because you remember like the most legit

744
00:41:54,360 --> 00:41:57,880
Speaker 1: hiding spot when you were like in the cpartment stores

745
00:41:58,040 --> 00:42:00,799
Speaker 1: was you'd go through the clothes into the middle. Yeah,

746
00:42:00,920 --> 00:42:03,880
Speaker 1: the best, No, it wasn't. I must have been like

747
00:42:04,400 --> 00:42:06,920
Speaker 1: the twelve thirteen something like that. I was at the

748
00:42:06,960 --> 00:42:11,640
Speaker 1: register and was at the register. I just locked eyes beautiful,

749
00:42:11,800 --> 00:42:15,600
Speaker 1: like look like a wolf, this dude, and um no,

750
00:42:15,800 --> 00:42:19,600
Speaker 1: I was I was, uh sitting in a chair. I'm

751
00:42:19,600 --> 00:42:22,920
Speaker 1: like waiting for my mom to buy ship. Uh. And

752
00:42:23,719 --> 00:42:26,680
Speaker 1: there's it's just TJ Max. There's just ship everywhere. There's

753
00:42:26,680 --> 00:42:28,480
Speaker 1: not a lot of people around. I'm like wearing a

754
00:42:28,560 --> 00:42:31,640
Speaker 1: big jacket and I'm like wearing a coat. You know,

755
00:42:31,719 --> 00:42:35,080
Speaker 1: it's it's winter in Nebraska. And I just I just

756
00:42:35,280 --> 00:42:37,000
Speaker 1: I just jerked off. It was I was bored. It

757
00:42:37,080 --> 00:42:39,440
Speaker 1: was out of boredom. It was like a jerk off

758
00:42:39,480 --> 00:42:43,360
Speaker 1: out of boredom. And but then I noticed the security

759
00:42:43,360 --> 00:42:45,960
Speaker 1: guard who was kind of looking at me. And it's

760
00:42:46,000 --> 00:42:49,360
Speaker 1: kind of hard to jerk off and not like movie

761
00:42:49,520 --> 00:42:53,280
Speaker 1: move your art, so I think I think he probably

762
00:42:53,440 --> 00:42:56,479
Speaker 1: was like this motherfucker's jerking off in this t J Max.

763
00:42:57,920 --> 00:43:00,600
Speaker 1: But then I couldn't stop because it was I was

764
00:43:00,680 --> 00:43:03,160
Speaker 1: too far down the process. So I just kept going,

765
00:43:03,440 --> 00:43:06,440
Speaker 1: even though I'm pretty sure I was already spotted. Yeah,

766
00:43:06,800 --> 00:43:09,120
Speaker 1: like spotted, like you spotted your pants like you were

767
00:43:10,560 --> 00:43:14,200
Speaker 1: the Yeah, the pants were messed up. What I did

768
00:43:14,320 --> 00:43:18,160
Speaker 1: is I went in the bathroom afterwards and threw them away.

769
00:43:19,120 --> 00:43:21,200
Speaker 1: Oh I've done that, and you're like, mom, I want

770
00:43:21,200 --> 00:43:22,920
Speaker 1: to buy these pants. I'm gonna wear them out of

771
00:43:23,080 --> 00:43:28,160
Speaker 1: the d J Max. You threw your pants away, not

772
00:43:28,280 --> 00:43:31,480
Speaker 1: the pants, the andies, the andes. Yes, yeah, I've away

773
00:43:31,520 --> 00:43:34,759
Speaker 1: when I sharted my Joe boxers, my Joe box Oh Kyle,

774
00:43:34,880 --> 00:43:38,760
Speaker 1: do tell about your sharting. I'm shart You were jacking

775
00:43:38,800 --> 00:43:41,839
Speaker 1: off and then sharted. Well, yeah, I was jacking off.

776
00:43:41,920 --> 00:43:44,279
Speaker 1: That was all clean. This was no dude, I've just

777
00:43:44,320 --> 00:43:47,319
Speaker 1: thrown my indies away because I have shipped myself before. Like, wow,

778
00:43:47,360 --> 00:43:50,080
Speaker 1: I want to shift at Brendan Theaters. Dude, me too.

779
00:43:50,400 --> 00:43:53,719
Speaker 1: We both ship pants at the same job. Do you

780
00:43:53,719 --> 00:43:56,080
Speaker 1: guys think you ate something? Well, I think we threw

781
00:43:56,080 --> 00:43:57,960
Speaker 1: them out in the same place to right, like that

782
00:43:59,440 --> 00:44:05,879
Speaker 1: next door spot I love Terry. Did thout you guys

783
00:44:06,040 --> 00:44:08,759
Speaker 1: ate a place? I love Terry HOCKI It was bomb, dude.

784
00:44:08,800 --> 00:44:11,920
Speaker 1: They give discounts to everybody who worked at Brendan Theaters

785
00:44:11,960 --> 00:44:15,400
Speaker 1: and it was very delicious. But it was rich. It

786
00:44:15,600 --> 00:44:19,080
Speaker 1: was it was very rich. So you guys like it's

787
00:44:19,080 --> 00:44:21,680
Speaker 1: happened to me. It must have been a few times,

788
00:44:21,760 --> 00:44:23,920
Speaker 1: but just the one time that I really remember it

789
00:44:24,239 --> 00:44:26,600
Speaker 1: was the State Up Comedy Night that I said in

790
00:44:26,680 --> 00:44:29,960
Speaker 1: one of the very first podcasts where yeah, the whole

791
00:44:29,960 --> 00:44:31,239
Speaker 1: third came out and I put in the pot of

792
00:44:31,280 --> 00:44:34,720
Speaker 1: plant wrapped in a napkin. Uh, but this, it sounds

793
00:44:34,760 --> 00:44:38,560
Speaker 1: like it happens fairly frequently to you. Count Uh, why

794
00:44:38,600 --> 00:44:40,160
Speaker 1: do you think that is? Do you think it's all

795
00:44:40,239 --> 00:44:42,920
Speaker 1: the veggies? Do you think maybe you need No, No,

796
00:44:43,120 --> 00:44:45,239
Speaker 1: this is something that's been going on since I was

797
00:44:45,320 --> 00:44:48,440
Speaker 1: the meat eater. I just have like leakage. Um, oh

798
00:44:48,520 --> 00:44:51,719
Speaker 1: you got a seepage situation. It's a steep situation. Yeah,

799
00:44:51,920 --> 00:44:53,920
Speaker 1: just like a loose Oh what are we thinking? Like

800
00:44:54,239 --> 00:44:57,240
Speaker 1: your spincters lose? You blew your O ring? No. Sometimes

801
00:44:57,280 --> 00:44:59,320
Speaker 1: I just pushed too hard to fart and then you know,

802
00:44:59,560 --> 00:45:01,960
Speaker 1: some stuff comes out. You know, it's like that's what happened.

803
00:45:02,719 --> 00:45:05,520
Speaker 1: It is a delicate dance. And sometimes you're like I

804
00:45:05,640 --> 00:45:08,240
Speaker 1: got total control of Nope, I just ship my pants.

805
00:45:08,440 --> 00:45:09,879
Speaker 1: I have a fart right now. If you guys would

806
00:45:09,920 --> 00:45:12,879
Speaker 1: like to hear it, would you like to hear it? Yes? Yes, yeah,

807
00:45:13,400 --> 00:45:25,960
Speaker 1: I don't. I don't dude. Was that real stereo that

808
00:45:26,440 --> 00:45:29,920
Speaker 1: didn't sound real at all? Was that real band? Smells real,

809
00:45:30,000 --> 00:45:35,480
Speaker 1: bad smells real. Yeah, yeah, no, so I have I

810
00:45:35,560 --> 00:45:38,239
Speaker 1: have great farts, like fantastic farts, and I always want

811
00:45:38,280 --> 00:45:39,880
Speaker 1: to hear them, and I always want to give my

812
00:45:40,040 --> 00:45:45,040
Speaker 1: best performative and sometimes it's it's ship if I may.

813
00:45:45,800 --> 00:45:48,360
Speaker 1: I just want to say, like, based on hearing the

814
00:45:48,520 --> 00:45:50,960
Speaker 1: like slap, the snap, crackle and pop of your butt hole,

815
00:45:51,080 --> 00:45:53,160
Speaker 1: it does not sound like it's very tight, Like I

816
00:45:53,239 --> 00:45:55,640
Speaker 1: feel like things would slip out of that. Correct, That's

817
00:45:55,640 --> 00:45:57,960
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. There was like extra clapp. It just

818
00:45:58,600 --> 00:46:03,080
Speaker 1: just from the audio could tell that things could slide out. Yeah,

819
00:46:03,200 --> 00:46:05,120
Speaker 1: I mean it just had a flatness to it, you know,

820
00:46:05,239 --> 00:46:09,480
Speaker 1: kind of like a little too loose and slappy, you know. Yeah,

821
00:46:09,760 --> 00:46:17,200
Speaker 1: pop it pops. Correct, yes, correct, Yes, that's a correct assessment.

822
00:46:17,200 --> 00:46:19,120
Speaker 1: And then you gave it I thought it was all done,

823
00:46:19,160 --> 00:46:21,400
Speaker 1: and then you gave it extra yeah, which tells me

824
00:46:21,440 --> 00:46:24,800
Speaker 1: that's when you're really playing with fire. That's when seepage happens.

825
00:46:25,520 --> 00:46:27,680
Speaker 1: It's also when the funniest farts happened, When you think

826
00:46:27,680 --> 00:46:29,200
Speaker 1: you're done and then you hit him again, you know

827
00:46:29,239 --> 00:46:31,520
Speaker 1: what I mean. Of course, little pulsing action is good

828
00:46:31,600 --> 00:46:33,960
Speaker 1: for the comedy, it's science we're not saying it isn't

829
00:46:34,120 --> 00:46:38,399
Speaker 1: right right, but yes, it comes with a raw deal

830
00:46:38,600 --> 00:46:41,200
Speaker 1: where sometimes you shoot yourself. Yeah, hey man, you play

831
00:46:41,200 --> 00:46:45,080
Speaker 1: with fire, you get burned. Raw deal every once in

832
00:46:45,080 --> 00:46:47,040
Speaker 1: a while. I agree, brother. Well you ever you know

833
00:46:47,120 --> 00:46:49,480
Speaker 1: when it started happening when I was like obsessed with

834
00:46:49,719 --> 00:46:52,879
Speaker 1: lighting my farts on fire, like torking? Are we talking

835
00:46:52,880 --> 00:46:57,200
Speaker 1: about trking? Wait, turkika, is that what you call it?

836
00:46:57,320 --> 00:47:01,280
Speaker 1: TORQUI yeah, we call it torking. That's choreing and versus torking.

837
00:47:01,520 --> 00:47:05,800
Speaker 1: It's not torching. We called it torquing. Why did you

838
00:47:05,880 --> 00:47:07,879
Speaker 1: call it that? This is just lighting your hearts on fire?

839
00:47:07,920 --> 00:47:09,400
Speaker 1: What's the reason? I don't know. That's why. That's how

840
00:47:09,400 --> 00:47:10,800
Speaker 1: I learned it at summer camp, and I used to

841
00:47:10,880 --> 00:47:12,880
Speaker 1: fucking tork it up. You know what I think happened.

842
00:47:13,200 --> 00:47:17,160
Speaker 1: I think they said torching. You said torquing. No one

843
00:47:17,239 --> 00:47:19,840
Speaker 1: told you otherwise. Then you took that home from Southern

844
00:47:20,040 --> 00:47:26,000
Speaker 1: as summer camp. From Southern camp. Mama out here talking

845
00:47:26,520 --> 00:47:30,960
Speaker 1: to be more sudden? Uh? Do you think that because

846
00:47:31,120 --> 00:47:34,480
Speaker 1: torquing doesn't make any sense? Torching makes perfect sense. I

847
00:47:34,560 --> 00:47:39,560
Speaker 1: will say a couple of things. That's possible. So that's possible. Secondly, secondly,

848
00:47:40,400 --> 00:47:42,319
Speaker 1: does it have to make sense? Half of this ship

849
00:47:42,480 --> 00:47:46,120
Speaker 1: never makes sense. Just what's what's chorking? Chorking makes a

850
00:47:46,160 --> 00:47:51,000
Speaker 1: lot of sense. What is it? It's an a amonopia.

851
00:47:51,360 --> 00:47:54,480
Speaker 1: Let's leave it to the people out there, slides m enough,

852
00:47:54,600 --> 00:47:57,800
Speaker 1: torking is a thing? Is it corking or is it torching?

853
00:47:57,960 --> 00:48:00,239
Speaker 1: But yeah, that was a very fun I'm not saying

854
00:48:00,280 --> 00:48:02,359
Speaker 1: if it is one or the other, because I'm sure

855
00:48:02,400 --> 00:48:05,840
Speaker 1: there's variants out there, like delta, there's variants. It's the

856
00:48:05,960 --> 00:48:09,360
Speaker 1: Delta variants. Whatever you want. It's tight. If people have

857
00:48:09,560 --> 00:48:12,600
Speaker 1: never heard of torking before, let me know. T O

858
00:48:13,080 --> 00:48:15,719
Speaker 1: R K, I n G. It's that's something. Oh it's

859
00:48:15,719 --> 00:48:21,279
Speaker 1: a k. It's not even q Q yeah down. Yeah.

860
00:48:21,320 --> 00:48:22,960
Speaker 1: But I was very good at lighting my thoughts on

861
00:48:23,080 --> 00:48:25,960
Speaker 1: fire and where I definitely did it every time I

862
00:48:26,000 --> 00:48:29,480
Speaker 1: possibly could. And this has been an episode. And you guys,

863
00:48:29,800 --> 00:48:34,360
Speaker 1: uh were I mean, you guys were Bay Area like

864
00:48:34,560 --> 00:48:37,920
Speaker 1: that the suburbs forty five minutes outside of the Bay

865
00:48:37,960 --> 00:48:45,960
Speaker 1: Area and something area forty five minutes away from Tom

866
00:48:46,000 --> 00:48:51,040
Speaker 1: Hanks is. But yeah, but so you guys would sag

867
00:48:51,200 --> 00:48:54,799
Speaker 1: your pants down so fucking far correct, So your whole

868
00:48:54,840 --> 00:48:58,080
Speaker 1: asshole is hanging out, and so there's just one tiny

869
00:48:58,200 --> 00:49:01,960
Speaker 1: little thin piece of fabric between an open flame and

870
00:49:02,080 --> 00:49:06,840
Speaker 1: you're gaping gas leaking asshole. Yes, well we thought that

871
00:49:07,000 --> 00:49:08,640
Speaker 1: was the safe way to do it, because Blake didn't

872
00:49:08,640 --> 00:49:10,920
Speaker 1: your dad have a horror story about like when he

873
00:49:11,040 --> 00:49:14,680
Speaker 1: did it bear ass and his asshole actually sucked the Yeah,

874
00:49:14,719 --> 00:49:16,719
Speaker 1: you don't do it. You do it through your pants too.

875
00:49:16,880 --> 00:49:18,840
Speaker 1: You could do it through your gene. His asshole actually

876
00:49:18,960 --> 00:49:20,440
Speaker 1: sucked the I don't know if it was your dad

877
00:49:20,480 --> 00:49:22,719
Speaker 1: who did this, but some one of his friends. Well,

878
00:49:22,840 --> 00:49:25,120
Speaker 1: this is what I was about to ask you guys. Well,

879
00:49:25,160 --> 00:49:28,320
Speaker 1: we now that we know your dad listens to the podcast,

880
00:49:28,719 --> 00:49:31,720
Speaker 1: so I'm pretty sure as your dad that this happened

881
00:49:31,719 --> 00:49:36,520
Speaker 1: to dad. It wasn't. No, that was what I was

882
00:49:36,560 --> 00:49:38,839
Speaker 1: about to ask you, dudes. Was I was like, did

883
00:49:38,920 --> 00:49:43,040
Speaker 1: you hear the urban like legend where some kid kind

884
00:49:43,040 --> 00:49:45,160
Speaker 1: of was trying to light his fart on fire and

885
00:49:45,440 --> 00:49:49,359
Speaker 1: the flames sucked up into his asshole and burned his intestines?

886
00:49:49,600 --> 00:49:52,719
Speaker 1: And I believe that you do. Yeah, no, And I

887
00:49:52,800 --> 00:49:54,920
Speaker 1: thought that was your dad that that happened to know,

888
00:49:55,200 --> 00:50:01,120
Speaker 1: my dad's asshole is fully functioning to my knowledge. Good. See,

889
00:50:01,200 --> 00:50:03,680
Speaker 1: so I thought I was being safe by going through

890
00:50:03,760 --> 00:50:06,600
Speaker 1: the pants, but I think I might have funked up

891
00:50:06,640 --> 00:50:09,840
Speaker 1: my ass and caused sept So this is the route

892
00:50:10,280 --> 00:50:14,680
Speaker 1: you had, like a charred hole. Wait, yeah, I think

893
00:50:14,719 --> 00:50:20,080
Speaker 1: I'm driving this. That's right. I can draw a correlation

894
00:50:20,280 --> 00:50:23,759
Speaker 1: between lighting my farts on fire, and I can draw

895
00:50:23,840 --> 00:50:28,040
Speaker 1: a picture of my butthole free, free hand from memory,

896
00:50:28,640 --> 00:50:31,400
Speaker 1: and it's just a black blob. Just squat over a

897
00:50:31,520 --> 00:50:34,919
Speaker 1: mirror and give me a charcoal drawing everything. I could

898
00:50:35,040 --> 00:50:39,040
Speaker 1: draw a picture of a bottle pre and like holding

899
00:50:39,080 --> 00:50:43,680
Speaker 1: your nuts up and just kind of just yeah, I

900
00:50:43,760 --> 00:50:45,920
Speaker 1: think it caused seepage. Be careful out their kids. Just

901
00:50:46,040 --> 00:50:49,640
Speaker 1: be careful and careful torquing or torching or whatever you

902
00:50:49,760 --> 00:50:51,080
Speaker 1: call it, and do it. If you're gonna do it,

903
00:50:51,160 --> 00:50:54,280
Speaker 1: do it through your underwear and your shorts or pants,

904
00:50:54,400 --> 00:50:57,239
Speaker 1: or at least underwear. At least underwear. So I jerk

905
00:50:57,280 --> 00:51:05,160
Speaker 1: off into j Blake is in worrious airplane, joy Kyle's

906
00:51:05,400 --> 00:51:09,919
Speaker 1: ships his pants more often than not. What's up? What's

907
00:51:09,960 --> 00:51:12,800
Speaker 1: what's what's your thing? When? Where did you jerk off? For?

908
00:51:12,960 --> 00:51:16,480
Speaker 1: What happened with your poops or what's your deep dark secret?

909
00:51:17,360 --> 00:51:19,680
Speaker 1: Just kissed on your yourself all the time? Piece you

910
00:51:19,760 --> 00:51:24,000
Speaker 1: gotta drip drop piece do I do love this podcast? Um?

911
00:51:25,320 --> 00:51:28,520
Speaker 1: I don't know the one like Ruth the dare like

912
00:51:28,800 --> 00:51:33,320
Speaker 1: a little girl? Hey else? Were you grosser? Violating it?

913
00:51:34,560 --> 00:51:36,319
Speaker 1: The one thing that pops in my head. I think

914
00:51:36,360 --> 00:51:38,160
Speaker 1: I told the story about when I shipped at south

915
00:51:38,200 --> 00:51:41,480
Speaker 1: By Southwest in the shower and then later at the

916
00:51:41,680 --> 00:51:44,839
Speaker 1: like converse like giveaway story we were at oh when

917
00:51:44,880 --> 00:51:48,160
Speaker 1: we were all together? Yeah, yes, yeah, what happened. Though

918
00:51:48,160 --> 00:51:50,040
Speaker 1: I don't know what happened. I was there. I didn't

919
00:51:50,080 --> 00:51:52,000
Speaker 1: tell the story. I do remember this. And this is

920
00:51:52,280 --> 00:51:55,680
Speaker 1: adulthood too, so this isn't this isn't even we were

921
00:51:55,760 --> 00:51:58,520
Speaker 1: telling like you're starting the career. Is we're targeting just

922
00:51:58,600 --> 00:52:01,000
Speaker 1: as like eight years ago or something. After drinking beers

923
00:52:01,040 --> 00:52:02,880
Speaker 1: for like forty eight hours, you know you're an awesome

924
00:52:03,239 --> 00:52:08,759
Speaker 1: you're pounding some lone stars. So getting ready for the

925
00:52:08,840 --> 00:52:11,279
Speaker 1: day because we kind of get like important that we

926
00:52:11,400 --> 00:52:13,919
Speaker 1: get carted around, right, we get card around all this stuff.

927
00:52:13,960 --> 00:52:15,560
Speaker 1: There's kind of like an agenda, so like hey, shower,

928
00:52:15,640 --> 00:52:17,279
Speaker 1: met us down here. It's like all right, I'm in

929
00:52:17,320 --> 00:52:20,040
Speaker 1: the shower like Kyle, I'm like, all right, I got fart.

930
00:52:20,080 --> 00:52:22,880
Speaker 1: IM just gonna rip it. And then I just shipped

931
00:52:22,920 --> 00:52:25,960
Speaker 1: into the shower and I was like just kind of

932
00:52:26,400 --> 00:52:29,000
Speaker 1: I think this is why I don't shoot, and I'm

933
00:52:29,040 --> 00:52:32,400
Speaker 1: never forcing farts out. Farts sometimes leak out of me.

934
00:52:32,760 --> 00:52:34,400
Speaker 1: I think that's the issue. Yeah, but I didn't. I

935
00:52:34,440 --> 00:52:38,440
Speaker 1: didn't want to. That's well that's leaking anyway. Um, but

936
00:52:38,600 --> 00:52:44,640
Speaker 1: diarrhea in the shower is like die. So then we

937
00:52:44,760 --> 00:52:48,920
Speaker 1: go to this converse like giveaway thing and it's set

938
00:52:49,000 --> 00:52:50,440
Speaker 1: up in like a house or something. Right, do you

939
00:52:50,480 --> 00:52:52,600
Speaker 1: guys remember this? They had like an American flagman out

940
00:52:52,640 --> 00:52:56,680
Speaker 1: of white and blue shoes, and there's two cute installment.

941
00:52:56,719 --> 00:52:58,480
Speaker 1: There's two bathrooms. One has a line and I'm like,

942
00:53:00,040 --> 00:53:04,719
Speaker 1: ship my pants. Uh. The other one, um has no line. Right,

943
00:53:04,760 --> 00:53:06,400
Speaker 1: So I go in that woman that's just got a

944
00:53:06,480 --> 00:53:08,640
Speaker 1: toilet and I'm like, well, I'll go I'll take a

945
00:53:08,680 --> 00:53:11,520
Speaker 1: piss because we were just slamming beers. So I piss

946
00:53:11,800 --> 00:53:16,200
Speaker 1: and I'm like while I'm pissing, I just ship my underwear, right,

947
00:53:17,320 --> 00:53:20,960
Speaker 1: And so it's just a toilet. There's not even a

948
00:53:21,120 --> 00:53:24,480
Speaker 1: sink in there. There's not even a garbage can, right,

949
00:53:25,160 --> 00:53:27,120
Speaker 1: And I'm like, I'm laughing extra hard because I know,

950
00:53:27,280 --> 00:53:29,800
Speaker 1: out of the four of us, dirs would be the

951
00:53:29,840 --> 00:53:33,320
Speaker 1: funniest to have this situation happened to full full and

952
00:53:33,400 --> 00:53:36,759
Speaker 1: it's like it's like derees And I'm like, okay, So

953
00:53:36,800 --> 00:53:38,640
Speaker 1: I get my underwear off and I just bunch them

954
00:53:38,719 --> 00:53:42,239
Speaker 1: up in my hand and then I go and I like,

955
00:53:42,760 --> 00:53:46,279
Speaker 1: stay onome to Isaac, I go, yeah, I tossed with

956
00:53:46,320 --> 00:53:52,440
Speaker 1: my manager. I say, manage this, um. And then or

957
00:53:52,480 --> 00:53:55,120
Speaker 1: maybe i'd kept them on. Fuck, I don't know. But

958
00:53:55,200 --> 00:53:57,040
Speaker 1: I go and stand in the other line for the

959
00:53:57,120 --> 00:53:59,520
Speaker 1: other bathroom because I see that it's got like full

960
00:53:59,680 --> 00:54:03,760
Speaker 1: every thing in there. Um. And then I get in there, peanut,

961
00:54:03,800 --> 00:54:06,440
Speaker 1: but the underwear off, bury it under like all the

962
00:54:06,480 --> 00:54:08,759
Speaker 1: paper towels that are there, wash my hands and get

963
00:54:08,800 --> 00:54:10,120
Speaker 1: the funk out of there. And then I was just

964
00:54:10,200 --> 00:54:13,680
Speaker 1: freeballing it for the rest of the day, um, fully chafing.

965
00:54:13,920 --> 00:54:19,279
Speaker 1: You know, no thigh gap here, So sounds like you

966
00:54:19,360 --> 00:54:22,160
Speaker 1: handled it like a birl. Sounds like you mgiver your diarrhea.

967
00:54:22,280 --> 00:54:25,440
Speaker 1: Well done. But here's here's the one that's stuck out

968
00:54:25,520 --> 00:54:30,759
Speaker 1: of my memories is that I was at church one time, right,

969
00:54:31,520 --> 00:54:34,920
Speaker 1: and the one time went to church well, now my

970
00:54:34,960 --> 00:54:36,640
Speaker 1: favorite my parents took me to the hell at church

971
00:54:36,719 --> 00:54:39,080
Speaker 1: as a kid. Um, I just didn't believe it. So

972
00:54:41,440 --> 00:54:43,680
Speaker 1: it was it was not fun for anybody, including the

973
00:54:43,719 --> 00:54:49,200
Speaker 1: people there. But so we were like we were like

974
00:54:49,880 --> 00:54:54,080
Speaker 1: singing and I wiped my ass. We were getting ready

975
00:54:54,120 --> 00:54:56,560
Speaker 1: for like singing or choir or something like that, right,

976
00:54:56,560 --> 00:54:58,080
Speaker 1: and I'm like, hey, I'm gonna go to the bathroom

977
00:54:58,120 --> 00:55:00,480
Speaker 1: so I can just bail. And They're like, okay, hurry back.

978
00:55:00,880 --> 00:55:02,600
Speaker 1: So I go to the bathroom and they have urinals

979
00:55:02,640 --> 00:55:04,160
Speaker 1: that go all the way down to the floor, you

980
00:55:04,200 --> 00:55:06,879
Speaker 1: know those ones, right, the best ones, and they put

981
00:55:06,920 --> 00:55:08,960
Speaker 1: ice in the bottom of them. Yeah, I love pissing

982
00:55:09,000 --> 00:55:12,200
Speaker 1: on that ice. This church not in this Lord's this

983
00:55:12,360 --> 00:55:15,719
Speaker 1: lord's house. Uh, it wasn't a sports stadium. So I'm

984
00:55:15,719 --> 00:55:19,560
Speaker 1: in sweatpants because I'm like ten, I guess, and I

985
00:55:19,680 --> 00:55:21,719
Speaker 1: just point my dick straight down. I'm like looking up

986
00:55:21,719 --> 00:55:25,839
Speaker 1: at the ceiling like you're in sweatpants at church. It's

987
00:55:25,880 --> 00:55:29,160
Speaker 1: like a youth like daytime. It's like a youth thing. Yeah,

988
00:55:29,200 --> 00:55:30,920
Speaker 1: you might do a climbing wall or what kind of

989
00:55:31,000 --> 00:55:33,800
Speaker 1: a church. Is this that doesn't check? U? I don't know.

990
00:55:33,880 --> 00:55:37,680
Speaker 1: It's like you're a liar. Yeah, sweatpants at church, not

991
00:55:37,840 --> 00:55:41,239
Speaker 1: at my church? All right? Anyway, everyone at homes like

992
00:55:41,480 --> 00:55:45,440
Speaker 1: this story is so boring? Can we just get through it? Uh? So,

993
00:55:45,600 --> 00:55:48,040
Speaker 1: I I'm I'm taking a piss, like pointing down at

994
00:55:48,040 --> 00:55:49,520
Speaker 1: the bottom of the urinal and I just like I'm

995
00:55:49,600 --> 00:55:51,960
Speaker 1: look up the ceiling and then I looked down when

996
00:55:52,000 --> 00:55:55,200
Speaker 1: I'm done pissing, and I pissed all over my sweatpants

997
00:55:57,719 --> 00:56:00,520
Speaker 1: almost entirely right, and I'm like, I feel like I've

998
00:56:00,520 --> 00:56:04,279
Speaker 1: had that. Fuck. So I got like a long shirt

999
00:56:04,320 --> 00:56:08,279
Speaker 1: because it's blake. What decade is it? Nineties? Baby? It's

1000
00:56:09,000 --> 00:56:11,520
Speaker 1: so I'm like stretching the shirt. There's no way to

1001
00:56:11,600 --> 00:56:13,920
Speaker 1: fucking dry it. I gotta go back in there. I

1002
00:56:14,040 --> 00:56:16,600
Speaker 1: go back to like this room where they're doing choir whatever,

1003
00:56:17,120 --> 00:56:19,040
Speaker 1: and I just sit and I pulled my shirt over

1004
00:56:19,200 --> 00:56:22,720
Speaker 1: my knees like they used to do in the nineties

1005
00:56:25,280 --> 00:56:28,240
Speaker 1: kids stretched there or whatever. And so they were like, Okay,

1006
00:56:28,280 --> 00:56:29,880
Speaker 1: We're gonna like get up and do choir. And I

1007
00:56:30,000 --> 00:56:32,040
Speaker 1: was like, I'm not doing it, and they were like,

1008
00:56:32,160 --> 00:56:33,960
Speaker 1: what is problem? What's your problem. I'm like I don't

1009
00:56:33,960 --> 00:56:36,239
Speaker 1: want to do it, but I'm like covering my whatever.

1010
00:56:36,280 --> 00:56:39,000
Speaker 1: It's like, fine, you stay there, and then they like

1011
00:56:39,120 --> 00:56:41,799
Speaker 1: when did it like in front of me, like all

1012
00:56:41,920 --> 00:56:45,080
Speaker 1: like rehearsing the thing. Then like finally she's like, you

1013
00:56:45,120 --> 00:56:47,160
Speaker 1: know what, I've had enough and it's been it's probably

1014
00:56:47,239 --> 00:56:50,320
Speaker 1: been twenty minutes or a half a pants and she

1015
00:56:50,480 --> 00:56:54,000
Speaker 1: like grabs my arm, she pulls me. Oh. And I

1016
00:56:54,120 --> 00:57:00,319
Speaker 1: looked down and it's fully dried, and thank you God, Max.

1017
00:57:00,400 --> 00:57:03,799
Speaker 1: And I was like this, God, guy's pretty cool. Oh

1018
00:57:03,880 --> 00:57:07,359
Speaker 1: my god, he's got my back. That is the way

1019
00:57:07,480 --> 00:57:10,960
Speaker 1: the Lord works. Did you believe after that? Know? What

1020
00:57:11,120 --> 00:57:13,840
Speaker 1: I found out was that there was a guy in

1021
00:57:13,920 --> 00:57:17,479
Speaker 1: the urinal holding holding my dick down that I didn't see,

1022
00:57:17,640 --> 00:57:20,040
Speaker 1: and then the same guy was under my chair the

1023
00:57:20,080 --> 00:57:24,400
Speaker 1: whole time blowing it dry. Oh my god, he's in jail. Yeah,

1024
00:57:24,680 --> 00:57:28,360
Speaker 1: now this checks out. This is important. We go. This

1025
00:57:28,560 --> 00:57:31,360
Speaker 1: was an elder. But I could not believe it was dropped.

1026
00:57:31,600 --> 00:57:33,760
Speaker 1: It was critical. I was like, I would say that

1027
00:57:34,120 --> 00:57:37,440
Speaker 1: would drive a man to believe in Lord. The Lord works,

1028
00:57:37,480 --> 00:57:41,680
Speaker 1: and mysterious wis I have done? Because I got I

1029
00:57:41,760 --> 00:57:47,360
Speaker 1: got these big gass thoughts. Right. So sometimes me, sometimes

1030
00:57:47,400 --> 00:57:49,640
Speaker 1: when I'm sitting on in toilet, they pressed together and

1031
00:57:49,680 --> 00:57:52,560
Speaker 1: then it's like wedges my dick up. My dick goes

1032
00:57:52,640 --> 00:57:58,200
Speaker 1: like shriek underneath me. And so then I what underneath you?

1033
00:57:58,320 --> 00:58:00,560
Speaker 1: Hold on a second, will you draw that guy? Well, no,

1034
00:58:00,640 --> 00:58:02,440
Speaker 1: I'm trying to drop. I'm trying to figure that out.

1035
00:58:02,560 --> 00:58:04,480
Speaker 1: What are you saying, Kyle, draw me like one of

1036
00:58:04,520 --> 00:58:07,120
Speaker 1: your butt holes? Show us, just show us, like how

1037
00:58:07,160 --> 00:58:10,720
Speaker 1: Blake showed us the fruit basket. I can't really it

1038
00:58:10,920 --> 00:58:14,160
Speaker 1: wedges your dick up underneath your bum? Yeah, because because

1039
00:58:14,240 --> 00:58:17,120
Speaker 1: my legs are pressing together and I do my best

1040
00:58:17,160 --> 00:58:18,400
Speaker 1: to stick it all the way down, but I'm looking

1041
00:58:18,440 --> 00:58:20,080
Speaker 1: at my phone. I'm not doing you know, And so

1042
00:58:20,280 --> 00:58:23,160
Speaker 1: like this happens to me, right, I know exactly. And

1043
00:58:23,240 --> 00:58:25,560
Speaker 1: you shoot through the seats and you shoot through the

1044
00:58:26,000 --> 00:58:28,920
Speaker 1: seat and the bottom and then it hoses the back

1045
00:58:29,000 --> 00:58:32,520
Speaker 1: of your pants. Yeah, so it's you pissed yourself but

1046
00:58:32,680 --> 00:58:36,800
Speaker 1: somehow in the back that I will then uh grab

1047
00:58:37,000 --> 00:58:41,440
Speaker 1: a hair drop drive. So I think, like I've had

1048
00:58:41,480 --> 00:58:44,600
Speaker 1: at parties before where people think I'm just in there

1049
00:58:44,640 --> 00:58:47,800
Speaker 1: blow drying my hair for like five minutes right out. Yeah,

1050
00:58:47,840 --> 00:58:50,320
Speaker 1: and like the funk, and I'm like, you know, you

1051
00:58:50,440 --> 00:58:53,800
Speaker 1: just act like you pissed yourself. Fix it fix in

1052
00:58:53,880 --> 00:58:57,320
Speaker 1: my hair? Oh you mean like, oh I pissed myself.

1053
00:58:57,440 --> 00:59:01,520
Speaker 1: I'm using the hair drawing. Yeah. Sure, I kissed myself

1054
00:59:02,760 --> 00:59:05,840
Speaker 1: really in there trying the back of my pants because

1055
00:59:05,880 --> 00:59:10,240
Speaker 1: I kissed myself because I got fastized, which my ta

1056
00:59:10,400 --> 00:59:14,560
Speaker 1: up any points directly through and the pee out the

1057
00:59:14,680 --> 00:59:17,680
Speaker 1: little tiny hole between the top and the bottle. If

1058
00:59:17,720 --> 00:59:20,720
Speaker 1: it's any consolation that it happens to everybody, like, it's not,

1059
00:59:20,720 --> 00:59:22,040
Speaker 1: I don't think it has to do with your thoughts. Well,

1060
00:59:22,080 --> 00:59:24,560
Speaker 1: these guys are asking, like acting like it's never happened.

1061
00:59:24,760 --> 00:59:26,640
Speaker 1: It's not happening to me. That's because I think it's

1062
00:59:26,640 --> 00:59:30,040
Speaker 1: because the way you're describing it, it's like inconsequential, like

1063
00:59:30,280 --> 00:59:32,640
Speaker 1: it doesn't just if you're taking a piss more about

1064
00:59:32,680 --> 00:59:36,480
Speaker 1: your thighs. Yeah, well that's how I what I imagine

1065
00:59:36,520 --> 00:59:40,560
Speaker 1: why what the issue was It's happened to you, Kyle,

1066
00:59:40,920 --> 00:59:43,000
Speaker 1: because you looked at me like I was a fucking

1067
00:59:43,200 --> 00:59:45,680
Speaker 1: lunatic a minute ago. You guys didn't see the look

1068
00:59:45,680 --> 00:59:48,800
Speaker 1: at home. No, I just didn't quite get I didn't

1069
00:59:48,920 --> 00:59:51,960
Speaker 1: quite get the visual I didn't quite get okay, but

1070
00:59:52,080 --> 00:59:53,880
Speaker 1: now that you get it, have you done that to

1071
00:59:53,920 --> 00:59:56,560
Speaker 1: your so? I mean I have? Yes, Yes, I've missed

1072
00:59:56,600 --> 00:59:59,760
Speaker 1: the mark. Yes, yeah, okay, I like that where Peer

1073
01:00:00,080 --> 01:00:04,760
Speaker 1: enturing Kyle into admitting he's pissed his pants. Yes you have, Yes,

1074
01:00:04,880 --> 01:00:07,360
Speaker 1: you have you No, I haven't just pissed on my

1075
01:00:07,480 --> 01:00:09,920
Speaker 1: pants while sitting and taking a ship. Sure, yes, you

1076
01:00:10,040 --> 01:00:12,760
Speaker 1: sucked it up, like yes, isn't that crazy? You make

1077
01:00:12,800 --> 01:00:14,680
Speaker 1: it to the toilet and you still piss your paints

1078
01:00:15,280 --> 01:00:18,560
Speaker 1: your pants. Yeah, that's fucking nuts. That's life. Brother. Has

1079
01:00:18,600 --> 01:00:20,600
Speaker 1: that happened to you, That's happened to you before? Yeah,

1080
01:00:20,600 --> 01:00:23,280
Speaker 1: I've I've been sitting peen and piste through the seat. Okay,

1081
01:00:23,400 --> 01:00:26,320
Speaker 1: that's it's important. Yes. So this is like a global

1082
01:00:26,440 --> 01:00:30,080
Speaker 1: phenomenon that the men aren't talking about. And this is

1083
01:00:30,120 --> 01:00:32,640
Speaker 1: why we have this platform, guys, so we can really

1084
01:00:32,680 --> 01:00:36,080
Speaker 1: get out in front of these hot button issues. Yeah,

1085
01:00:36,280 --> 01:00:39,880
Speaker 1: what's the fix politically? Yeah? You don't charge me up?

1086
01:00:40,280 --> 01:00:43,000
Speaker 1: Charge it up? Man, do not charge me up? How

1087
01:00:43,040 --> 01:00:45,320
Speaker 1: do you fix this? Who's which party is going to

1088
01:00:45,440 --> 01:00:48,240
Speaker 1: fix this? Okay? I don't know? Left, right up down?

1089
01:00:48,440 --> 01:00:52,960
Speaker 1: Who knows? Charge? Before we get to politically charged here.

1090
01:00:53,040 --> 01:00:58,000
Speaker 1: Does anybody have any uh take back to your apologies, handouts,

1091
01:00:58,240 --> 01:01:02,440
Speaker 1: handouts refunds. I would like to apologize right up top by.

1092
01:01:02,640 --> 01:01:04,760
Speaker 1: I didn't mean to come at him. You know, I

1093
01:01:04,880 --> 01:01:06,960
Speaker 1: wasn't trying to come at him. I was just trying

1094
01:01:07,000 --> 01:01:09,960
Speaker 1: to get a fun topic going. I just listened to

1095
01:01:10,120 --> 01:01:12,920
Speaker 1: a snippet of the other podcast where Blake told the

1096
01:01:13,280 --> 01:01:16,400
Speaker 1: jerking off to tomb Writer's story, and I'm like, I

1097
01:01:16,560 --> 01:01:18,880
Speaker 1: was like, well, he should talk about that on our podcast.

1098
01:01:19,080 --> 01:01:22,720
Speaker 1: That's fertile ground. I wasn't. I wasn't trying to come

1099
01:01:22,760 --> 01:01:25,680
Speaker 1: after you, And so I would like to apologize to

1100
01:01:25,800 --> 01:01:29,240
Speaker 1: Blake because I knew he was on his heels right away.

1101
01:01:29,520 --> 01:01:31,600
Speaker 1: Right guys, we were all kind of going at him,

1102
01:01:31,600 --> 01:01:33,720
Speaker 1: and it feels like he was on his heels, and

1103
01:01:33,760 --> 01:01:36,080
Speaker 1: I don't want him to feel like that. No, it's okay,

1104
01:01:36,200 --> 01:01:38,480
Speaker 1: it's okay. It's just I know, when we kick off

1105
01:01:38,560 --> 01:01:41,080
Speaker 1: a pod with Come, we're going to rab the comb

1106
01:01:41,160 --> 01:01:46,920
Speaker 1: slide the whole way, baby, true, true, true true, And

1107
01:01:47,040 --> 01:01:49,640
Speaker 1: those are some of the best this. I mean, the

1108
01:01:50,040 --> 01:01:52,760
Speaker 1: name of this one should just be coming ship right

1109
01:01:53,200 --> 01:01:57,960
Speaker 1: coming ship, This is coming important. Oh my god, we're sick,

1110
01:01:58,240 --> 01:02:02,680
Speaker 1: ride the comb slide with the bull. We need help. Hey,

1111
01:02:02,920 --> 01:02:07,600
Speaker 1: we're kind of nasty. I'll apologize to Adam, my bad

1112
01:02:07,880 --> 01:02:11,680
Speaker 1: for just peacing out on the party right when the

1113
01:02:11,800 --> 01:02:15,200
Speaker 1: people I invited got to your place. I had to

1114
01:02:15,280 --> 01:02:17,400
Speaker 1: get that Hawks game. But it sounds like you handled

1115
01:02:17,440 --> 01:02:19,720
Speaker 1: it like a champion, So I'm proud to say you're

1116
01:02:19,760 --> 01:02:22,600
Speaker 1: my friend. I think I handled it okay, Yeah, do

1117
01:02:22,720 --> 01:02:25,680
Speaker 1: you think that? Maybe? And uh, you know, I'm not

1118
01:02:25,880 --> 01:02:28,680
Speaker 1: I haven't gone to any counseling. But maybe there was

1119
01:02:28,720 --> 01:02:31,200
Speaker 1: some deep seated thing about that that that's why I

1120
01:02:31,400 --> 01:02:35,280
Speaker 1: came at you unintentionally, maybe a little harder man. Maybe

1121
01:02:35,320 --> 01:02:38,720
Speaker 1: that was a vengeance that and I didn't even realize that,

1122
01:02:38,920 --> 01:02:41,720
Speaker 1: you know. Maybe I don't know, Adam. You refuse to

1123
01:02:41,840 --> 01:02:44,160
Speaker 1: go to any sort of therapy, so I don't know.

1124
01:02:44,280 --> 01:02:49,760
Speaker 1: I've never done therapy. I don't know. And well, I

1125
01:02:49,800 --> 01:02:53,240
Speaker 1: don't know how that beautiful mind works. Bread that maybe

1126
01:02:54,400 --> 01:02:59,400
Speaker 1: you got me. I'll compliment you, wonders, uh for handling

1127
01:02:59,480 --> 01:03:03,600
Speaker 1: that shart attack like with grace and um just being

1128
01:03:03,640 --> 01:03:05,840
Speaker 1: wonderful out there in Austin. I was right there next year,

1129
01:03:05,880 --> 01:03:08,360
Speaker 1: and I don't remember it. And I just can't believe

1130
01:03:08,520 --> 01:03:11,040
Speaker 1: that you handled it and did all that and just yeah,

1131
01:03:11,080 --> 01:03:14,040
Speaker 1: I told you guys, like after the fact, I was also,

1132
01:03:14,080 --> 01:03:16,400
Speaker 1: don't I don't listen to you that often. Yes, I

1133
01:03:16,520 --> 01:03:20,360
Speaker 1: remember this story, but vaguely, just because you you played

1134
01:03:20,400 --> 01:03:26,560
Speaker 1: it so cool. Grace is grace and composure like killer

1135
01:03:26,600 --> 01:03:31,320
Speaker 1: grace and composure under shark attack. I feel like South

1136
01:03:31,360 --> 01:03:33,520
Speaker 1: Buys a pretty good place to have it go down

1137
01:03:33,560 --> 01:03:37,000
Speaker 1: because everyone's wrong. Yeah, a lot of people have shipped

1138
01:03:37,000 --> 01:03:40,520
Speaker 1: their pants at South Southwest. Yeah, most people have. If

1139
01:03:40,560 --> 01:03:42,680
Speaker 1: I would, if people have, yeah, if I had to guess,

1140
01:03:42,760 --> 01:03:49,240
Speaker 1: it was for sure, I'm shooting my pants of my life, beautiful.

1141
01:03:49,320 --> 01:03:52,560
Speaker 1: I do have a take back. I just want to

1142
01:03:52,640 --> 01:03:55,880
Speaker 1: take back all the time I spent in church if

1143
01:03:55,880 --> 01:04:00,560
Speaker 1: I could, if I could just get that back. Wow,

1144
01:04:00,720 --> 01:04:03,800
Speaker 1: even as the bard reached down with his hot breath

1145
01:04:03,920 --> 01:04:07,880
Speaker 1: and dried your little boy sweatpants off, and and look,

1146
01:04:08,040 --> 01:04:10,560
Speaker 1: and here's the deal, Like, do I appreciate this is

1147
01:04:10,600 --> 01:04:13,080
Speaker 1: when he's carrying you. This is when there's one fotprint

1148
01:04:13,120 --> 01:04:15,520
Speaker 1: in the sand, one footprint in the puddle. Look, I

1149
01:04:15,600 --> 01:04:19,880
Speaker 1: appreciate it. It was it was nice, It was a

1150
01:04:20,080 --> 01:04:24,040
Speaker 1: nice try. But it didn't get me okay, thank you God, perfect,

1151
01:04:24,160 --> 01:04:27,240
Speaker 1: all right, hey guys, and this has been another episode

1152
01:04:27,360 --> 01:04:28,880
Speaker 1: of This Is