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Speaker 1: And so off the cuff, you go back to the

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Speaker 1: days with your mom and you record yourself doing a little.

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Speaker 2: Dance Vanilla ice ice ice baby, yeah, Ice ice baby Yeah.

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Speaker 2: It was like, I mean, like you said in the

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Speaker 2: height of COVID, I was like, dude, can we just

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Speaker 2: change the conversation? And again, like I don't discredit how

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Speaker 2: serious that time was, but I was like, can we smile?

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Speaker 3: Can we laugh?

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Speaker 2: Can we just change the conversation a little bit? So

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Speaker 2: drop my phone down, put on ice sized baby.

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Speaker 4: Literally just on a wheel.

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Speaker 1: Just put your phone down and say, let me see

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Speaker 1: how this recording thing.

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Speaker 3: Mark as it.

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Speaker 2: And within twenty four hours it had three point five

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Speaker 2: million views and.

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Speaker 3: Just comments or comments. But you made my day.

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Speaker 1: Welcome to an army of normal folks. I'm Bill Courtney.

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Speaker 1: I'm a normal guy. I'm a husband, I'm a father,

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Speaker 1: I'm an entrepreneur, and I've been a football.

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Speaker 4: Coach an inner city Memphis.

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Speaker 1: And that last part it somehow led to an oscar

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Speaker 1: for the film about our team. That movie is called Undefeated.

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Speaker 4: Y'all.

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Speaker 1: I believe our country's problems will never be solved by

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Speaker 1: a bunch of fancy people in nice suits using big

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Speaker 1: words that nobody ever uses on CNN and Fox, but

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Speaker 1: rather by an army of normal folks us just you

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Speaker 1: and me deciding, hey, I can help. That's what Russell Butler,

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Speaker 1: the voice we just heard, has done. And those three

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Speaker 1: point five million views eventually turned into one point two

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Speaker 1: million followers on Instagram and one point six million followers

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Speaker 1: on TikTok, and Russell became known as the Dancing ups Man.

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Speaker 1: But in spite of his fame, he's still a normal dude,

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Speaker 1: delivering packages with ups and delivering on his ministry of

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Speaker 1: sharing good vibes through dance. I cannot wait for you

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Speaker 1: to meet Russell right after these brief messages for March

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Speaker 1: Ender sponsors, Russell Butler, Welcome to Memphis, bro By Man,

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Speaker 1: and it's you know, we're here on a Saturday morning, which.

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Speaker 4: That's my off time.

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Speaker 1: Yes, sir, mine too well. But here's the thing. When

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Speaker 1: we tried to get you down here, it was hilarious.

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Speaker 1: You know, we're an army of normal folks, right, and

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Speaker 1: why you couldn't come down here. You had to shift,

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Speaker 1: You had to deliver packages twelve hours a day. Maybe

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Speaker 1: it's I mean you were working yesterday.

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Speaker 2: I was I was telling Alex, I didn't get off

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Speaker 2: till almost nine o'clock last night, Yes, sir.

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Speaker 1: And caught a plane at four this morning.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that flight was fun.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, you're welcome.

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Speaker 1: So when you were landing in the Memphis Airport and

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Speaker 1: you flew over those massive, beautiful white with the red

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Speaker 1: FedEx tail coming in and you're flying over the world

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Speaker 1: headquarters of FedEx in the hub, did you feel like

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Speaker 1: you crossed over into enemy or territory?

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Speaker 3: Exactly? Exactly.

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Speaker 2: Hey, but I don't know if you saw my One

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Speaker 2: of my recent posts was so that's the still much

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Speaker 2: love and much respect to all delivery drivers.

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Speaker 3: Were all in it together. We're all doing the same job.

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Speaker 2: But I danced in front of a FedEx truck and

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Speaker 2: the dude was like.

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Speaker 3: Oh for it, bro, the fed were you ups stup?

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Speaker 1: You were brown dancing from the Fedextra and the FedEx drivers.

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Speaker 2: Like, I call it out ups and FedEx and said,

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Speaker 2: who's better?

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Speaker 4: That's awesome. Yeah, So welcome to Memphis and you're staying

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Speaker 4: the night.

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Speaker 3: Thank you for having me.

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Speaker 4: Well, we will do something tonight.

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Speaker 1: We will have to get Memphis barbecue in you so

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Speaker 1: you will finally be able to understand that y'all's Texas

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Speaker 1: barbecue is not.

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Speaker 3: Doesn't cut it.

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Speaker 4: You real beef, you barbecue pork. There you go.

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Speaker 1: Folks in Texas had that wrong for decades. So we'll

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Speaker 1: prove that up to you.

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Speaker 3: Awesome. I look forward to.

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Speaker 4: It, all right.

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Speaker 1: Cool last thing for our listeners, Uh, this is a

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Speaker 1: attendant event. There's probably thirty or forty people who have come,

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Speaker 1: and I want to say to everybody that's here, thank

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Speaker 1: you for joining us, Thank you for being here. I

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Speaker 1: have one really cool shout out on that. There's a

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Speaker 1: dude name Mitch with his dad named Steve that last

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Speaker 1: night drove from Ohio to be here for this and

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Speaker 1: a turning around and going home.

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Speaker 4: Where are you guys?

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Speaker 1: There?

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Speaker 4: They are so welcome.

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Speaker 1: Thank you for being a great support of the show.

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Speaker 1: And Russell told me how honored he was that you

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Speaker 1: guys did that seems a lot man, So, friends, family, fans,

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Speaker 1: thank you for being here.

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Speaker 4: It means the world to me, and I know it

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Speaker 4: means a lot to Russell. So with that, where'd you

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Speaker 4: grow up? Dude?

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Speaker 3: Born and raised Lubbock, Texas? Man So getting into mom

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Speaker 3: and dad.

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Speaker 2: Lubbock, Texas, poor as could be to the point of

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Speaker 2: being homeless. At one point, Dad got fired, moved to Sweetwater,

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Speaker 2: Texas for almost a year, came back to Lubbock. We

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Speaker 2: were living in our car, calling friends, calling family.

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Speaker 3: In the car.

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Speaker 2: Correct, yeah, calling friend. Well, my oldest brother was he

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Speaker 2: moved to Saint Louis at the time.

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Speaker 3: But my older brother, Corey.

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Speaker 2: Me Corey, Mom, dad and her dog had all our

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Speaker 2: belongings in a Buick regal reigning and Mom's on the phone,

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Speaker 2: calling friends, calling family. Finally gets a hold of my

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Speaker 2: aunt and we had a home for a couple of

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Speaker 2: months until Dad found another job.

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Speaker 3: So that was I mean, that was my upbringing.

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Speaker 1: Man by no means privileged, by no means.

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Speaker 3: No, I you know.

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Speaker 2: And that's that's the thing, Bill is, Like, what I

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Speaker 2: want to pass on to my kids is what my

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Speaker 2: dad passed on to me is hard work, being a

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Speaker 2: good man, character, integrity.

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Speaker 3: That's what I want to instill in my boys.

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Speaker 4: So you went to high school in Lubbock or yes, sir?

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Speaker 3: All right, so junior high?

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Speaker 4: Say yes, sir again, I'm gonna wrestle you.

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Speaker 3: Man.

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Speaker 4: You ain't that much younger than me.

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Speaker 3: Dog. You know what, you know, what's funny Texas thing.

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Speaker 2: I say it to everybody, anybody, and I mean.

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Speaker 1: I respect it, all right, right, but we got a

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Speaker 1: beer in front of us. We're grind City Brewing in Memphis, Tennessee,

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Speaker 1: with thirty or forty people out here. No, yes, sirs today,

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Speaker 1: all right? Just yeah, all right, all right. So you

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Speaker 1: went to high school in love. You play sports? Do

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Speaker 1: all that I did.

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Speaker 2: So I grew I mean grew up playing ball, baseball, football.

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Speaker 2: Baseball was my jam.

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Speaker 1: Baseball is your jam. Yeah, okay, my damn uh. You're

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Speaker 1: pretty good golfer too.

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Speaker 4: Aren't you.

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Speaker 3: I play a little bit, i'd, yeah, play.

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Speaker 4: A little bit, so you were almost pro right?

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Speaker 3: I tried.

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Speaker 2: I tried, Yeah, I was. I was in the golf

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Speaker 2: business for about ten years. Tried to qualify for the

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Speaker 2: Texas Open two different times.

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Speaker 3: Shot seventy one sixty.

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Speaker 4: Eight and pretty good.

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Speaker 3: The guy who took.

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Speaker 2: It though, sixty three sixty two, so that showed me

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Speaker 2: really quick.

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Speaker 3: I wasn't quite there.

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Speaker 4: But yeah, but you're still pretty good, i'd. So you're

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Speaker 4: athletic is the point?

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Speaker 3: Yes, yeah, I will say that. I want to my

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Speaker 3: own horn, but yes, I'm athletic.

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Speaker 4: All right.

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Speaker 1: So you came up athletic kid, not a privileged life,

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Speaker 1: but a mother and father who loved you and cared

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Speaker 1: for you and taught you the basic tenets and fundamentals

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Speaker 1: of what it is to be a hard working, character

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Speaker 1: driven good man.

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Speaker 3: I'll tell you what, Bill, My mom and dad they're

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Speaker 3: my world, man, They're my world. Sorry.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, so lost both of them within fast forward, lost

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Speaker 2: both of them within a month of each other in

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Speaker 2: twenty sixteen, which.

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Speaker 1: Was we are jumping ahead and we're gonna go back

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Speaker 1: before we get there. But people need to know that

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Speaker 1: was a triggering moment for you in your life.

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Speaker 2: But yeah, sorry, Rewind, I mean mom and dad. Dad's

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Speaker 2: showing me work ethic Mom. Mom was there for everything

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Speaker 2: because Dad couldn't be because of work.

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Speaker 4: That's typical.

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Speaker 2: But yeah, I mean two of the most phenomenal human

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Speaker 2: beings to ever grace this planet.

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Speaker 1: So growing up, you told me that your parents loved music. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: and your dad was a country dude. In your words,

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Speaker 1: your dad was Your dad loved country full country was cool.

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Speaker 3: That's right, That's what mom always so. What mom always

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Speaker 3: said about.

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Speaker 1: Dad and your mom, her jam was like Elvis and

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Speaker 1: Marvin Gay and all of that, and then you had

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Speaker 1: a brother who was all in the eighties music, and

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Speaker 1: he had another brother who was a hip hop num

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Speaker 1: that's right. So I mean you're surrounded by genre.

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Speaker 3: I mean, I'm smack dab in the middle of every

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Speaker 3: genre of music you can imagine.

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Speaker 1: And I read that like when you were a kid,

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Speaker 1: your mom would be cooking and she'd be jamming out

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Speaker 1: on Marvin Gay or Elvis or something, and you and

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Speaker 1: her would just dance in the kitchen.

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Speaker 2: Man, I'll never forget, like especially Saturday mornings, she'd be

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Speaker 2: doing biscuits.

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Speaker 3: Gravy, eggs, the whole deal. But music was.

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Speaker 2: Always going in our house and Mom would be in

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Speaker 2: the kitchen doing her thing, but always dancing while doing it,

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Speaker 2: and she would grab my hand pull me in there,

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Speaker 2: and we would go to town.

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Speaker 4: Dude, that's beautiful.

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Speaker 1: But it's also awesome because the minute you start talking

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Speaker 1: about that, your facial expression changes. Yeah, you get you

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Speaker 1: can see the happiness and the chill just come over

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Speaker 1: you the minute you say anything about that.

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Speaker 3: And what's so cool?

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Speaker 1: Man?

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Speaker 2: Is like as I grew up, I mean, I mean

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Speaker 2: both of them, but Mom especially, she always encouraged it.

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Speaker 3: She was like, I see it in you. I love it.

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Speaker 3: Put on some music Let's go always.

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Speaker 4: I love it.

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Speaker 1: So that's kind of how you came up. And a

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Speaker 1: couple of really rough things happened in your life. One

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Speaker 1: you've alluded to, which I do want you to go

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Speaker 1: into a little more, not for the sake of you know,

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Speaker 1: I'm not trying to sensatialize your story. It's just your

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Speaker 1: main to your story. And then also the capital of

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Speaker 1: the football team, the president's student council, the alpha dog

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Speaker 1: who is your bro committed suicide.

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Speaker 4: Tell us about those?

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Speaker 2: Yeah man, so Heath Stewart. So we met in algebra

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Speaker 2: in high school and automatically hit it off. Best friend

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Speaker 2: vibe from the get go, baseball, football, shared so much

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Speaker 2: in common, and yeah man, so after high school, I

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Speaker 2: just remember, golly, we were twenty six. I mean, I

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Speaker 2: lived with the dude for about two or three years.

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Speaker 2: I was going through my rough patch, depression, anxiety, my

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Speaker 2: suicidal thoughts started around twenty one, twenty two, and by

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Speaker 2: the grace of God, I overcame that. But you fast

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Speaker 2: forward twenty six years old. The last time I saw

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Speaker 2: Heath alive was at our friend Zach's wedding and I

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Speaker 2: just remember looking at him and.

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Speaker 3: His eyes everything he just looked dark.

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Speaker 2: And I mean I could feel and sense that what

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Speaker 2: he was going through and what I went through when

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Speaker 2: I went through it was so parallel. And yeah, man,

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Speaker 2: I'll never forget. I got home from work or I

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Speaker 2: was taking a nap and mine now ex wife woke

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Speaker 2: me up and said, Heath gone committed suicide. And his dad,

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Speaker 2: Robert Stewart, he is like my second daddy.

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Speaker 1: And now a few messages from our gender sponsors. But first,

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Speaker 1: I hope you'll consider signing up to join the army

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Speaker 1: at normal folks dot us. By signing up, you'll receive

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Speaker 1: a weekly email with short episode summaries in case you

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Speaker 1: happen to miss an episode or if you prefer reading

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00:14:40,000 --> 00:15:00,200
Speaker 1: about our incredible guests. We'll be right back. So tell

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Speaker 1: me about your depression and your anxiety and your suicidal.

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Speaker 4: Thoughts, y'all. We're gonna get to the redemption.

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Speaker 1: And this is the Dadgune dancing ups man hanging out

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Speaker 1: with over here.

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Speaker 2: Yes, sir, and oh yeah, sorry, no sergs today.

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Speaker 4: That's right.

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Speaker 1: He is the guy that puts smiles on faces of

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Speaker 1: people just by his actions. And we're gonna get into

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Speaker 1: all that, But his story is not about being able

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Speaker 1: to dance while he's delivering packages and shooting out stuff.

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Speaker 4: That's the top line of the story.

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Speaker 1: His story is much deeper than that, and what he

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Speaker 1: does with his ability to dance, what you do with

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Speaker 1: your ability to dance is the redemption and the beauty

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Speaker 1: of who you are as a human being and what

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Speaker 1: you spread. But to get to that, to fully understand it.

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Speaker 1: At twenty two, every single day you thought about killing yourself.

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Speaker 3: I did so.

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Speaker 2: At twenty one. I mean I remember it like it

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Speaker 2: was yesterday. I was living with Mom and Dad in

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Speaker 2: Big Spring. Dad got transferred to Big Spring with Rip Griffin,

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Speaker 2: and I wasn't working at the time. I mean honestly,

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Speaker 2: Dad was working his tail off, and he was like,

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Speaker 2: I'll tell you what, Mom.

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Speaker 3: Is super depressed.

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Speaker 2: If you want to stay home and be with her,

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Speaker 2: keep her company, that's good with me.

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Speaker 3: So that's what I did, me and Mom.

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Speaker 2: And that's the coolest part about you know, bittersweet, right,

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Speaker 2: life sing and yang, but just being there with Mom

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Speaker 2: and developing that friendship with her and Dad when he

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Speaker 2: came home.

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Speaker 3: But it got to me after a while.

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Speaker 2: I realized at the time, like I'm aimless, I'm hopeless,

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Speaker 2: like so, it just accumulates and accumulates, and that's where

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Speaker 2: drugs started coming in. All the addictions started coming in.

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Speaker 2: And yeah, man twenty one, twenty two years old, addiction

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Speaker 2: and suicidal thoughts were a daily thing. And it got

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Speaker 2: to the point it was like, if this is my life,

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Speaker 2: I don't want to do it.

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Speaker 3: If this is what it's going to be from now on,

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Speaker 3: I don't want to do it. How close, gun in hand,

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Speaker 3: locked and loaded on the edge of the bed, ready

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Speaker 3: to go.

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Speaker 2: So, for those of y'all who kind of know my

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Speaker 2: story a little bit about me, in that moment, I

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Speaker 2: literally cried out to God, if this is it.

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Speaker 3: I can't do it. And I can't even explain.

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Speaker 2: What happened in that moment as far as my faith,

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Speaker 2: as far as my belief, but there was a light

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Speaker 2: that just went off inside of me that said, you

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Speaker 2: were worth so much more than where you are right now,

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Speaker 2: and you're gonna get through this.

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Speaker 3: And when you get through this, you're.

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Speaker 2: Gonna show millions of people how to get through this.

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Speaker 4: So did you find a purpose with that gun in

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Speaker 4: your hand?

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Speaker 3: Absolutely?

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Speaker 2: And that is my mission as of today. If you're

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Speaker 2: in that place, you have a purpose.

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Speaker 3: And that is.

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Speaker 2: Why I'm using what God has given me and using

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Speaker 2: this platform to tell people you have a purpose and

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Speaker 2: you were worth so much more than what you know.

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Speaker 1: So how long after that moment did your buddy commit

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Speaker 1: suicide and then your parents' poss.

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Speaker 2: So again, I was twenty one twenty two when I

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Speaker 2: went through that, and Heath committed suicide at twenty six.

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Speaker 4: Dude, if you.

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Speaker 1: And you know depression and anxiety because you lived it.

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Speaker 1: You were on the edge of the bed when you

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Speaker 1: saw him at twenty six and saw the darkness and

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Speaker 1: everything else.

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Speaker 4: You had to have known.

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Speaker 2: And you know what's what's crazy about that, Bill is,

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Speaker 2: like I said, his dad is like my second dad.

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Speaker 2: And we've talked about this several times, and you know,

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Speaker 2: it's one of those things you to kick yourself in

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Speaker 2: the butt. It's like I see it and didn't say anything.

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Speaker 3: You know what I mean?

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Speaker 4: Is that because mental health is so taboo.

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Speaker 2: I believe so, like seriously, like twenty six years old,

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Speaker 2: Like what do I what do I say to this guy?

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Speaker 3: Like I know I went through it, Like what do

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Speaker 3: I tell him? And it's you know, it's life.

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Speaker 2: It's like everybody goes through their own journey and you

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Speaker 2: just you just assume that he's going to come out

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Speaker 2: of it. And that's that's the issue taboo. You said it.

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Speaker 1: You know, if somebody's got cancer, we rally around them.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, you know we will.

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Speaker 1: We will shave our heads, we will wear pink ribbons,

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Speaker 1: we will raise money, we will do all kinds of

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Speaker 1: things about cancer if somebody's got.

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Speaker 4: I mean, I think about Saint.

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Speaker 1: Jude, which I know you're involved in, and the money

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Speaker 1: you've helped, the ray Saint Jude, and the smiles you

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Speaker 1: put on those good spaces. Mental health kills people daily.

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Speaker 1: Yet it's almost a whisper that we talk about mental

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Speaker 1: health with rather than a attack that we attack other.

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Speaker 4: Ailments with.

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Speaker 2: And that and that's the thing, Bill is like, I

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Speaker 2: I know when I was going through what I was

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Speaker 2: going through, I didn't know how.

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Speaker 3: To talk about it.

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Speaker 2: I didn't know who to talk to. And that's that's

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Speaker 2: the issue, is like, if you're going through that, and

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Speaker 2: That's where I'm at in life now, is like I

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Speaker 2: see a counselor if you're even today, even today, if

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Speaker 2: you start recognizing those symptoms or or if you see

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Speaker 2: somebody with those, yes, you're exactly right, it's time to

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Speaker 2: talk about it.

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Speaker 1: I've read we're jumping ahead and we're gonna get back,

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Speaker 1: but like a squirrel up a tree, I'm gonna change it. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I've read that even today you have a largely rule

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Speaker 1: route delivering your ups back ages, and some of those

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Speaker 1: long drives between spots on certain days, your anxiety will

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Speaker 1: start kicking you hard.

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Speaker 2: So even today, even today, I mean, that's the ding, dude,

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Speaker 2: It's it's a daily grind. Like if you and that's

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Speaker 2: my family history of depression, I mean, dude, bipolar, manic,

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Speaker 2: all of it. It's a family thing. And for me

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Speaker 2: it's a daily thing. So you know, what I'm trying

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Speaker 2: to get across to people through what I do is

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Speaker 2: how do you manage it? And again between seeing my

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Speaker 2: counselor and I'm like, if you're to the point that

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Speaker 2: it's gotten so dark that you feel you need medication,

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Speaker 2: by all means, do what you have to do to

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Speaker 2: take care of yourself.

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Speaker 4: What do you do?

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Speaker 1: But what's the rustle personal thing? Because I've read it,

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Speaker 1: I think some of it's hilarious. And I want you

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Speaker 1: to tell, and some of it's profound.

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Speaker 2: So I mean, dude, you could put my daily routine

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Speaker 2: down to the minute. Wake up at five point thirty,

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Speaker 2: I do three rounds of breath work, I take a

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Speaker 2: cold shower, I work out, and then I start my day.

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Speaker 3: But it's like if I didn't do those things.

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Speaker 2: But I mean, if you look at the effect on

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Speaker 2: mental health with just doing that has a huge impact

385
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Speaker 2: on your mental health. Taking in quality food, I mean,

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Speaker 2: just the basics. But like I say, and of course

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Speaker 2: I dance, of course, of course I dance.

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Speaker 3: But you know, just doing doing the things that I

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Speaker 3: feel God has given us to do, to work, to

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Speaker 3: be outside to nature. Right.

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Speaker 2: But if you've gone, if your mental health is gone

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Speaker 2: beyond that point, like I say, seek help.

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Speaker 4: We'll be right back.

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Speaker 1: I've read where you've been driving down this rural route

395
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Speaker 1: and your anxiety hits, and you describe it as your

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Speaker 1: mind going nice any different directions and bouncing around in

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Speaker 1: your head where you can't even collect faults because your

398
00:25:04,359 --> 00:25:08,240
Speaker 1: anxiety's got you so worked up, and you pray, God,

399
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Speaker 1: not right now, I'm on my route, give me a break.

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Speaker 3: You know, you know it's funny bill. Just yesterday on

401
00:25:20,760 --> 00:25:23,520
Speaker 3: my route heavy as could be.

402
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Speaker 2: I had three hundred and fifty packages to get delivered.

403
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Speaker 2: It was a twelve hour day. Right, I walk in,

404
00:25:30,640 --> 00:25:34,360
Speaker 2: I see my truck. I look at my supervisor. I'm like, really, bro.

405
00:25:37,280 --> 00:25:40,040
Speaker 3: Like I could show you pictures like back to front.

406
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Speaker 2: You can't see light through the truck. And I'm out

407
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Speaker 2: there in the middle of nowhere. Yes, I was cussing

408
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Speaker 2: up a storm like this.

409
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Speaker 3: This is not happening today, But.

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Speaker 2: In that moment, it's mindset. I had the choice in

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00:26:02,560 --> 00:26:07,800
Speaker 2: that moment to be defeated and let that get to me.

412
00:26:10,280 --> 00:26:14,639
Speaker 2: And I called my son because in that moment, I

413
00:26:14,760 --> 00:26:18,160
Speaker 2: just started praying. I said, God, give me the strength

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Speaker 2: to do this job, for my kids, for myself.

415
00:26:22,840 --> 00:26:23,800
Speaker 3: Just give me strength.

416
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Speaker 2: Prayed, breathe, and like after about ten minutes, I was coasting.

417
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Speaker 2: I was actually, we're not supposed to run. I was

418
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Speaker 2: getting my workout in for the day running these packages

419
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Speaker 2: door to door.

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Speaker 3: But it's so funny, man, Like, you know my oldest, well,

421
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Speaker 3: all my boys, but my oldest in my middle.

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Speaker 2: You know, you watch them in sports or in school,

423
00:26:51,320 --> 00:26:55,720
Speaker 2: in life, and there's those moments where you just feel defeated,

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Speaker 2: and that's where you have to get in here.

425
00:27:00,840 --> 00:27:02,000
Speaker 3: And getting here.

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Speaker 2: My I mean mind over mattered, head and heart, head

427
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Speaker 2: and heart, dude all day.

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Speaker 4: So knowing that this is just your life.

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Speaker 1: Your parents pass and like you said, I think forty

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Speaker 1: one days between the passing of them and at the

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Speaker 1: top of this.

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Speaker 4: We saw your emotion with regard to what your parents

433
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Speaker 4: are to you.

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Speaker 1: Still even in death, you kind of fell off the

435
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Speaker 1: wagon a little left of that, right I did.

436
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Speaker 3: Man. So, like I say, it's.

437
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Speaker 2: If you suffer with mental health, especially the way me

438
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Speaker 2: and my family do it.

439
00:27:51,200 --> 00:27:57,600
Speaker 3: It's a daily thing. So you know, went through losing heath.

440
00:28:01,160 --> 00:28:03,399
Speaker 2: But I tell you when I lost mom and dad

441
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Speaker 2: within a month of each other, it changed my life,

442
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Speaker 2: completely changed my life.

443
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Speaker 3: So yeah, I mean, you know that's the thing.

444
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Speaker 4: Is like.

445
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Speaker 2: I'm at a place in my life where I can

446
00:28:24,040 --> 00:28:29,080
Speaker 2: balance having a beer, you know, balance, it's finding balance.

447
00:28:29,160 --> 00:28:31,240
Speaker 3: But at the time.

448
00:28:33,480 --> 00:28:39,480
Speaker 2: I didn't want to deal with it, so I turned

449
00:28:39,480 --> 00:28:42,680
Speaker 2: to all the addictions I turned to when I was

450
00:28:42,680 --> 00:28:44,920
Speaker 2: twenty one, and then some.

451
00:28:46,480 --> 00:28:52,960
Speaker 3: And uh, time to time.

452
00:28:54,440 --> 00:28:55,560
Speaker 4: Not good, not good.

453
00:28:56,240 --> 00:29:01,920
Speaker 1: And I gotta believe it's kind of a depression. Anxiety

454
00:29:02,040 --> 00:29:06,120
Speaker 1: drugs drugs are self medicating, but then when you lose

455
00:29:06,120 --> 00:29:08,320
Speaker 1: that high, now you're more to It's got to be

456
00:29:08,400 --> 00:29:10,600
Speaker 1: this just concentric circle of misery.

457
00:29:10,800 --> 00:29:14,280
Speaker 2: It one thousand percent that's exactly what it is. You

458
00:29:16,240 --> 00:29:20,120
Speaker 2: feel this anxiety. To relieve the anxiety, I'm going to

459
00:29:20,240 --> 00:29:22,200
Speaker 2: do this drug or I'm going to do that, or

460
00:29:22,240 --> 00:29:26,040
Speaker 2: I'm going to do this to relieve the anxiety. And

461
00:29:26,080 --> 00:29:29,680
Speaker 2: guess what that problem or that problem you didn't deal with,

462
00:29:30,480 --> 00:29:34,600
Speaker 2: It's still there tomorrow. So when the drug or alcohol

463
00:29:34,800 --> 00:29:38,240
Speaker 2: or whatever your substance of choices, when it wears off,

464
00:29:38,680 --> 00:29:42,600
Speaker 2: guess what the anxieties right back there.

465
00:29:43,560 --> 00:29:48,080
Speaker 1: And now when you're sober, you add the anxiety of

466
00:29:48,160 --> 00:29:51,560
Speaker 1: knowing that you're doing destructive crap to self medicate, and

467
00:29:51,600 --> 00:29:54,920
Speaker 1: now you have shame and guilt on top of everything else.

468
00:29:55,280 --> 00:29:57,720
Speaker 1: So it continues to ratchet up. I've heard this story

469
00:29:57,720 --> 00:30:03,440
Speaker 1: from other guests. Yeah, is that right? One percent accurate?

470
00:30:07,880 --> 00:30:10,360
Speaker 2: And I want to give a special shout out to

471
00:30:10,400 --> 00:30:15,880
Speaker 2: my ex wife. She's an amazing human being. She's an amazing.

472
00:30:15,480 --> 00:30:17,520
Speaker 3: Mother to our three boys.

473
00:30:18,760 --> 00:30:30,240
Speaker 2: And I'm at a place in life I own it all.

474
00:30:31,200 --> 00:30:43,120
Speaker 2: It's on me. I couldn't and wouldn't deal and cope.

475
00:30:44,040 --> 00:30:46,400
Speaker 2: So again, that's what I'm saying. If you know you're

476
00:30:46,400 --> 00:30:48,560
Speaker 2: in a place where you need help, get the help.

477
00:30:50,560 --> 00:30:54,400
Speaker 2: Don't turn to that pill. Don't turn to that drug

478
00:30:54,440 --> 00:30:57,320
Speaker 2: of choice, because, like you said, all it does is

479
00:30:57,360 --> 00:30:58,280
Speaker 2: create this cycle.

480
00:30:59,280 --> 00:31:02,800
Speaker 3: And in the middle of that cycle are the people

481
00:31:02,880 --> 00:31:08,000
Speaker 3: you love, and you gobble them up to and after

482
00:31:08,080 --> 00:31:11,960
Speaker 3: so long enough they've had enough.

483
00:31:12,480 --> 00:31:15,040
Speaker 1: Which leads to more anxiety and depression on your part

484
00:31:15,040 --> 00:31:17,040
Speaker 1: because now you're destroying the people you love the most.

485
00:31:17,240 --> 00:31:23,360
Speaker 1: Correct it is, it is a cycle of misery.

486
00:31:24,760 --> 00:31:25,240
Speaker 3: I'm just.

487
00:31:28,920 --> 00:31:33,440
Speaker 2: I am super thankful and super grateful to still have

488
00:31:33,640 --> 00:31:36,880
Speaker 2: her in my life in a respect because she's a

489
00:31:36,920 --> 00:31:40,680
Speaker 2: prayer warrior in my life and I'm fortunate enough to

490
00:31:40,840 --> 00:31:43,800
Speaker 2: have those few people in.

491
00:31:43,720 --> 00:31:45,920
Speaker 3: My life to be where I'm at today.

492
00:31:46,760 --> 00:31:47,280
Speaker 4: Good news.

493
00:31:47,280 --> 00:31:49,720
Speaker 1: After about three years of that, somehow you broke loose.

494
00:31:49,880 --> 00:31:59,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, man, I'm dead serious, dude, hitting my knees and

495
00:31:59,480 --> 00:32:04,520
Speaker 2: like I say, doing doing the things that I know

496
00:32:04,640 --> 00:32:08,960
Speaker 2: I need to do. When I tell myself to wake

497
00:32:09,040 --> 00:32:11,960
Speaker 2: up at five thirty, I wake up.

498
00:32:11,920 --> 00:32:12,680
Speaker 3: At five thirty.

499
00:32:13,200 --> 00:32:16,680
Speaker 2: When I have a Bible study. I have a Bible study.

500
00:32:16,720 --> 00:32:22,080
Speaker 2: When I again cold shower, eat the rite, foods, go

501
00:32:22,200 --> 00:32:27,000
Speaker 2: for a run, all the all the crap you don't

502
00:32:27,040 --> 00:32:30,239
Speaker 2: want to do in the moment, that's exactly what you

503
00:32:30,360 --> 00:32:34,480
Speaker 2: need to do to get across the other side.

504
00:32:34,680 --> 00:32:39,120
Speaker 4: So you discipline yourself out of it.

505
00:32:40,000 --> 00:32:45,320
Speaker 1: One do you know how much temerity and intestinal strength

506
00:32:45,320 --> 00:32:48,040
Speaker 1: it takes to do that? That says so much about

507
00:32:48,040 --> 00:32:50,800
Speaker 1: who you are as human being. And it goes back

508
00:32:50,840 --> 00:32:54,600
Speaker 1: to probably your dad, you.

509
00:32:54,560 --> 00:33:00,920
Speaker 3: Know, I Bill, I'll never forget. Dad would work.

510
00:33:01,440 --> 00:33:06,440
Speaker 2: So he was a diesel driver, would drive fourteen hours

511
00:33:06,440 --> 00:33:10,720
Speaker 2: a day, sometimes up to sixteen. But if he knew

512
00:33:10,720 --> 00:33:13,880
Speaker 2: I had a baseball game that day.

513
00:33:15,200 --> 00:33:16,720
Speaker 3: One of my fondest memories.

514
00:33:17,960 --> 00:33:21,000
Speaker 2: I'm about to get up to the plate to bat

515
00:33:21,600 --> 00:33:24,800
Speaker 2: and I see the tanker roll up in center field.

516
00:33:27,920 --> 00:33:31,600
Speaker 2: That is one of the fondest memories of my pop

517
00:33:32,240 --> 00:33:32,920
Speaker 2: to this day.

518
00:33:33,480 --> 00:33:34,840
Speaker 3: So yeah, exactly, dude.

519
00:33:34,920 --> 00:33:39,080
Speaker 4: He loved his kid, My folks.

520
00:33:39,080 --> 00:33:42,640
Speaker 3: Loved all three of us beyond measure.

521
00:33:43,760 --> 00:33:48,440
Speaker 1: So coming out of this thing, Russell wrote a book, y'all,

522
00:33:49,160 --> 00:33:53,800
Speaker 1: Battling Depression, Winning the War in Our Minds, is published

523
00:33:53,880 --> 00:33:58,840
Speaker 1: in twenty fifteen. Right, yes, sir, battling depression got it.

524
00:33:59,480 --> 00:34:03,480
Speaker 1: Winning the War in our minds?

525
00:34:04,400 --> 00:34:05,720
Speaker 4: What's that war? In your mind.

526
00:34:08,040 --> 00:34:15,000
Speaker 2: So you know, for me, and I think a lot

527
00:34:15,040 --> 00:34:20,759
Speaker 2: of people who battle mental health, I think it's a

528
00:34:20,840 --> 00:34:23,600
Speaker 2: fifty to fifty split between.

529
00:34:24,920 --> 00:34:28,920
Speaker 3: Body well, body mind and spirit is the way I

530
00:34:29,040 --> 00:34:30,440
Speaker 3: like to quote it.

531
00:34:33,440 --> 00:34:37,279
Speaker 2: If one of those body mind or spirit is out

532
00:34:37,280 --> 00:34:38,920
Speaker 2: of tune, out of sinc.

533
00:34:40,920 --> 00:34:43,480
Speaker 3: This is going to mess with you. So it's a

534
00:34:43,520 --> 00:34:44,360
Speaker 3: matter of.

535
00:34:46,160 --> 00:34:49,560
Speaker 2: For me getting the spirit right, then getting the body right,

536
00:34:49,600 --> 00:34:52,000
Speaker 2: and getting the mind right. And I think mind and

537
00:34:52,000 --> 00:34:53,160
Speaker 2: body go hand in hand.

538
00:34:53,880 --> 00:34:56,319
Speaker 1: So you're saying, if you get your spiritual life in

539
00:34:56,440 --> 00:35:00,640
Speaker 1: order and you take care of your body, that you're

540
00:35:00,680 --> 00:35:03,080
Speaker 1: aiding your mind.

541
00:35:02,800 --> 00:35:08,480
Speaker 4: To fight off the war that is depression and anxiety.

542
00:35:08,560 --> 00:35:10,319
Speaker 3: Correct, yep, yep.

543
00:35:11,680 --> 00:35:13,040
Speaker 4: And you believe that.

544
00:35:12,920 --> 00:35:17,560
Speaker 1: There's an added element of evil in that battle.

545
00:35:20,680 --> 00:35:21,600
Speaker 3: So I don't know if you saw.

546
00:35:21,640 --> 00:35:24,680
Speaker 2: I also did a podcast with Maurice Bernard.

547
00:35:24,960 --> 00:35:26,719
Speaker 1: I wish I had. I didn't, but I will check

548
00:35:26,760 --> 00:35:28,239
Speaker 1: it out, as will everybody else.

549
00:35:28,360 --> 00:35:31,799
Speaker 2: Yes, So Maurice and I were having this conversation. So

550
00:35:31,880 --> 00:35:36,359
Speaker 2: Maurice's story is also remarkable. Maurice, if you're watching Much

551
00:35:36,440 --> 00:35:39,680
Speaker 2: Love Brother, keep up the fight. But I mean he

552
00:35:40,320 --> 00:35:43,839
Speaker 2: hit the nail on the head when he was going

553
00:35:43,880 --> 00:35:46,880
Speaker 2: through his and same with me. I mean, it literally

554
00:35:47,000 --> 00:35:50,719
Speaker 2: feels like God and the devil are just going to war,

555
00:35:51,239 --> 00:35:56,720
Speaker 2: just going to war, and it's like you for your soul.

556
00:35:58,320 --> 00:36:01,600
Speaker 2: I believe there is a battle of good and evil.

557
00:36:02,640 --> 00:36:10,440
Speaker 3: So it's a matter of choosing daily to do.

558
00:36:12,239 --> 00:36:15,920
Speaker 2: I mean, really the basic right things in life, like

559
00:36:16,320 --> 00:36:23,200
Speaker 2: good and evil. Because it's easy, it's so easy to

560
00:36:23,400 --> 00:36:25,480
Speaker 2: turn to addiction.

561
00:36:25,840 --> 00:36:26,719
Speaker 3: It's easy.

562
00:36:27,920 --> 00:36:30,359
Speaker 2: I don't feel like doing this, I don't feel like

563
00:36:31,040 --> 00:36:33,879
Speaker 2: dealing with this. I'm gonna take a pill. I don't

564
00:36:33,960 --> 00:36:38,399
Speaker 2: feel like dealing with this. I'm just gonna get high

565
00:36:38,400 --> 00:36:44,480
Speaker 2: out of my mind. So it's a matter of physically

566
00:36:44,520 --> 00:36:48,080
Speaker 2: and mentally making that choice to do the things you

567
00:36:48,160 --> 00:36:48,960
Speaker 2: know you need.

568
00:36:48,800 --> 00:36:51,560
Speaker 3: To do to take care of yourself body, mind, and spirit.

569
00:36:58,360 --> 00:37:02,840
Speaker 1: And that concludes part one of my conversation with Russell Butler,

570
00:37:03,280 --> 00:37:06,000
Speaker 1: and trust me, you don't want to miss part two

571
00:37:06,239 --> 00:37:10,520
Speaker 1: that's now able to listen to, where he puts smiles

572
00:37:10,920 --> 00:37:15,560
Speaker 1: on everyone's faces. Together, guys, we can change this country.

573
00:37:15,880 --> 00:37:18,799
Speaker 1: It starts with you. I'll see in part two