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Speaker 1: M from grandmothers who whispered in their baby girl ill

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Speaker 1: two fathers on dimly lit street corners, instructing young soldiers

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Speaker 1: to always keep their eyes open. You be queen, you

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Speaker 1: were fired. You will pass through centuries on the hands

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Speaker 1: of your daughters. They called you wisdom. Proverbs on the

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Speaker 1: backs of diamond eyed school children who grew into hymnals

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Speaker 1: recited by amethyst holding urban philosophers who recited neighborhood commandments

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Speaker 1: out of the windows of restored Alchemedo chariots. To keep

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Speaker 1: the warmth of their blood. Be wise, be smart, being black,

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Speaker 1: Opal Brown courts bloodstone and prayer. Be every form of

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Speaker 1: Jim see King told, scribe, scribe, told son, son, told wife,

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Speaker 1: wife told her daughter, and daughter told the as this is.

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Speaker 1: And the ancestor has told me that you would come

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Speaker 1: to give wisdom. Thousands they said you would come, Dropping

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Speaker 1: Dropping Gim Welcome back to another episode of the Dropping

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Speaker 1: Jim's podcast, your soft place to land for conversations on

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Speaker 1: higher consciousness and tangible applicable tools to make all that

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Speaker 1: healing real and sustainable in your everyday life. Hello, I'm

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Speaker 1: Debbie Brown. Thank you for joining me. Thank you everyone

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Speaker 1: that has hit me up on i G. We had

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Speaker 1: some really fun Q and A episodes recently, So much

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Speaker 1: love to everyone that connected with those questions and connected

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Speaker 1: with the answers and let me know. Of course, as always,

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Speaker 1: I'm on Instagram at Debbie Brown, and take a second

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Speaker 1: to sign up for my newsletter. You go to the

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Speaker 1: website Debbie Brown dot com. You can sign up right

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Speaker 1: there for my newsletter and twice a month I'm sending

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Speaker 1: out tools, tips and different things that I'm connecting with

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Speaker 1: in the space of mindfulness and mindful awareness. So check

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Speaker 1: out up that newsletter there and today's episode, wow wow

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Speaker 1: wow Wow. Let me go back first, let me start

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Speaker 1: by letting everyone know that, you know, I believe it

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Speaker 1: was season two I was able to have this amazing

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Speaker 1: being on the show, and ever since they were on

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Speaker 1: that episode, that show has become such a favorite. It

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Speaker 1: is shared NonStop. The views on Instagram from our conversations

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Speaker 1: we've had are always a favorite, and it is just

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Speaker 1: always such a pleasure to be in conversation with this

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Speaker 1: gorgeous soul. So on today's episode, without further ado, I

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Speaker 1: have the amazing Diego Perez. Diego Perez is a meditator

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Speaker 1: and New York Times best selling author who is widely

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Speaker 1: known on Instagram and various social media networks through his

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Speaker 1: pen name Young Pueblo. Online, he has an audience of

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Speaker 1: a two point two million people. His writing focuses on

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Speaker 1: the power of self healing, creating healthy relationships, and the

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Speaker 1: wisdom that comes when we truly work on knowing ourselves.

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Speaker 1: His two books, Inward and Clarity and Connection, we're both

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Speaker 1: instant bestsellers. Diego's third book, Lighter, will be coming out

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Speaker 1: on October four two. Young Pueblo is the pen name

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Speaker 1: of writer Diego Perez, and it means young people. The

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Speaker 1: name is meant to convey that humanity is entering an

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Speaker 1: era of remarkable growth and healing, when many will expand

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Speaker 1: their self awareness and release old burdens without further Ado,

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Speaker 1: my friend, Welcome to the show, Young Pueblo. Diego Perez, Hey,

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Speaker 1: my friend, it's been a little while, but I'm glad

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Speaker 1: we're getting to do this again. I know it has

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Speaker 1: been a while, and it's so what's so interesting. First

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Speaker 1: of all, the episode we previously did is such a

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Speaker 1: listener favorite, and we had the chance, in the midst

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Speaker 1: of the pandemic to do this podcast together with your

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Speaker 1: last book, and also to do some I G lives

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Speaker 1: on social and I feel like we were really exploring

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Speaker 1: and expanding um on on such a important flow of

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Speaker 1: healing in such an important time in human history. So

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Speaker 1: it is always an honor to be in conversation with you. Yeah. Likewise,

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Speaker 1: I love the rhythm that we have together, So it's

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Speaker 1: um yeah, feeling really fortunate that we get to do

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Speaker 1: this again. So you have a new book out, and

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Speaker 1: I want to go ahead and lead with this. I

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Speaker 1: have so many things I want to talk about with you,

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Speaker 1: but I was really sitting with your book, especially you know,

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Speaker 1: quite a bit this week. And you know, I think

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Speaker 1: this goes without staying which it's obvious as a New

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Speaker 1: York Times bestselling author and someone with millions and millions

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Speaker 1: of followers, but your words, you know, as someone who

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Speaker 1: was a healer and works with a lot of energy.

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Speaker 1: When I pick up your books, when I even pick

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Speaker 1: up your Instagram and connect to your writing, it almost

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Speaker 1: feels like there's this surge of raiky energy coming off

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Speaker 1: the screen or off the pages into me, Like I

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Speaker 1: feel the layering of your mastery and your practice within

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Speaker 1: each letter and It's just such a such a healing

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Speaker 1: and such a profound gift you have with being able

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Speaker 1: to do that. Wow, thank you so much. That's such

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Speaker 1: a high compliment. Um. You know, a lot of it

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Speaker 1: I attributed just to the practice, Like I'm really diligent

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Speaker 1: about continuing my oviposit to practice about you know, meditating

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Speaker 1: my two hours a day and just having that be

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Speaker 1: like the two arcs that hold every thing together. And

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Speaker 1: you know, like I think we've talked about this before,

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Speaker 1: like I don't. I don't meditate to be a writer.

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Speaker 1: I meditate for my freedom. But um, but undoubtedly, you know,

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Speaker 1: the more I meditate, the more I feel sort of,

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Speaker 1: um like this creative flow is able to come forward,

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Speaker 1: and I'm able to like sort of combine that creative

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Speaker 1: flow with what I'm understanding about myself and just the

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Speaker 1: human experience in general. Mm hmm. I love when you

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Speaker 1: say I meditate for my freedom. I would love to

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Speaker 1: sit in that for a second. I did a podcast

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Speaker 1: episode recently where I was exploring the gifts of meditation,

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Speaker 1: and something I think that's so important about especially this

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Speaker 1: moment in time, is those that share through themselves what

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Speaker 1: the practice has done for them I think for a

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Speaker 1: very long time people that were enlightened with meditation, you

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Speaker 1: had to kind of change the language so that the

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Speaker 1: masses could connect. So the framework of talking about meditation

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Speaker 1: and was always or largely, not always, but largely through

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Speaker 1: the lens of zen, peace, inner calm. And that language

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Speaker 1: is challenging for people that have had complex lived experience

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Speaker 1: because it's a feeling that has never been felt and

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Speaker 1: doesn't actually make sense, and you wonder, well, why do

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Speaker 1: I need that? Why do I need to be still?

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Speaker 1: And so lately I've been really connecting just in deep

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Speaker 1: thought of how meditation uniquely feels in my own body.

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Speaker 1: And you know that meditation for freedom is so real,

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Speaker 1: and I was thinking through my lens um you know,

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Speaker 1: I meditate so I can be the mother my son deserves.

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Speaker 1: That's something that comes really forward for me as as

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Speaker 1: why my practice is so important. And lately I've been

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Speaker 1: really enjoying like this more electrified energy in my practice,

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Speaker 1: Like the meditation feels so pleasurable, Like you're just feeling like, wow,

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Speaker 1: I'm restoring myself, I'm opening myself, I'm freeing creations inside

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Speaker 1: of me. I would love to talk about your practice,

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Speaker 1: especially since you do such a beautiful ful to our

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Speaker 1: practice with yourself that brings you your freedom. What does

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Speaker 1: that feel like for you? And how have you noticed

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Speaker 1: changes over the last few years. Um, Yeah, that's a

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Speaker 1: great question. And I love that you're illuminating. Um. How

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Speaker 1: the how we talk about meditation, how that's evolved over time,

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Speaker 1: because the way I think about it now is like

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Speaker 1: an awareness of the inner turbulence. You know, it's not

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Speaker 1: so much like forcing myself to be still, but just

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Speaker 1: appreciating these like constant fluctuations that are happening, like not

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Speaker 1: just at the physical level, but at the emotional level.

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Speaker 1: And UM, then you know, not trying to force yourself

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Speaker 1: to be common concentrated, but allowing that to naturally arise

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Speaker 1: by appreciating how turbulent times can be. UM. And I

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Speaker 1: think UM for for me right the Apostan of practice.

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Speaker 1: So I meditate in the lubackn Go and good tradition

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Speaker 1: coming out of Burma, and it is a you know,

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Speaker 1: it's really about tapping into the flow of impermanence that's

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Speaker 1: happening in the body, about just feeling how you know,

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Speaker 1: everything is really changing, UM, and being able to just

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Speaker 1: sort of keep that attention within the framework of the body,

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Speaker 1: I think has helped me just stay connected to that

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Speaker 1: truth that things are always changing. And this is like

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Speaker 1: something that you find common throughout you know, from a

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Speaker 1: lot of different wisdom teachers talking about the power of

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Speaker 1: impermanence and um, how important it is to be understanding

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Speaker 1: of the fact that things will always change. But there's

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Speaker 1: something that that this practice is. You know, it's not

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Speaker 1: just at the intellectual level. It's not just like reminding myself, oh,

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Speaker 1: things will change, but you know, I actually get to

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Speaker 1: sit down and during during those two hours a day

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Speaker 1: and like literally connect again with the fact that everything

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Speaker 1: is changing. You know. So it's not just a thought

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Speaker 1: or you know, something that I'm trying to remind myself of.

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Speaker 1: It's an experience. I get to feel it. I get

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Speaker 1: to feel a change happening. And um, I think it's

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Speaker 1: changed me a lot over time, because you know, I

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Speaker 1: used to have a really static sense of self and

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Speaker 1: now my sense of self just feels much more open,

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Speaker 1: and you know, like I care a lot less about

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Speaker 1: um trying to keep myself one way, and I'm more

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Speaker 1: so just like let me just move and flow, Like

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Speaker 1: let's just see what's happening now, and you know my

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Speaker 1: change like my you know, my taste will change, and

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Speaker 1: you know what I want to read or what I

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Speaker 1: want to watch or um or you know what trips

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Speaker 1: my wife and I want to go take and stuff

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Speaker 1: like that. And it's just like, let's just keep evolving

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Speaker 1: and moving and letting it all flow. And I think, uh,

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Speaker 1: and the embrace of change has actually helped me stay

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Speaker 1: much more in alignment with um you know, the way

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Speaker 1: that I want to live in my life. Wow, wow wow.

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Speaker 1: You know, with that kind of connection and detachment that's present,

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Speaker 1: how do you feel that the last few years have

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Speaker 1: played into that? You know, I've been looking. I think

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Speaker 1: so many of us have been looking a lot at

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Speaker 1: some of the even in such a challenging time and

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Speaker 1: in a multitude of ways. For people, there is this

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Speaker 1: felt knowing that an awakened path or even sometimes a

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Speaker 1: spiritual fast tracking was kind of possible over the last

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Speaker 1: couple of years, I think for those that were aware

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Speaker 1: of it. So as you're as you're speaking to that

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Speaker 1: connection to the impermanence and to detaching from roles from outcomes,

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Speaker 1: did you notice any new knowings around that or any

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Speaker 1: kind of beneficial um layering to it that happened within

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Speaker 1: the last couple of years, because we are still so

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Speaker 1: deeply entrenched in like a living, expanded version of what

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Speaker 1: impermanence is right now, Yeah, I mean things are changing

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Speaker 1: very fast, and I think the way, um, you know,

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Speaker 1: it's become really clear the challenges that we have as

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Speaker 1: a humanity, right as a whole. We have these massive challenges.

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Speaker 1: And I think what impermanence has shown me, and just

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Speaker 1: like what the practice has revealed inside of me and

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Speaker 1: other people, and just like my fellow meditators, you know,

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Speaker 1: like I'm really fortunate to have a strong community of

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Speaker 1: people that like UM, that are you know, great friends

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Speaker 1: of mine who um also meditate in the same tradition,

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Speaker 1: and they just like, you know, they've all changed so

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Speaker 1: much over the past few years, and in ways that

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Speaker 1: are so powerful, Like there's so much more honesty, so

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Speaker 1: much more virtue, so much more like just ability to

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Speaker 1: to be like commonly present in chaos, which is like

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Speaker 1: an attribute that I'm constantly trying to cultivate. And I

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Speaker 1: see my you know, comrades cultivate to and and I

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Speaker 1: think what that's shown me, especially as I was finishing lighter,

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Speaker 1: Like as I was wrapping that book up, I was like,

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Speaker 1: you know, let me just really tell the truth, like

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Speaker 1: let me, let me really, let me really say what

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Speaker 1: I think. And I really feel that what's emerging, especially

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Speaker 1: out of this last decade or so, is the beginning

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Speaker 1: of a healing generation. Um, Like there are so many

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Speaker 1: people who are actively healing themselves in a way that

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Speaker 1: I think is unprecedented, Like literally millions of people around

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Speaker 1: the world, like millions and millions of people around the world,

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Speaker 1: who are you know, realizing how important it is to

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Speaker 1: take care of their mental health, who are starting to

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Speaker 1: pick up some form of meditation or another, or who

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Speaker 1: are starting to like take therapy seriously, or who are

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Speaker 1: even you know, doing neither, but are actively spending time

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Speaker 1: being introspective, you know, and they're like journaling and trying

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Speaker 1: to figure themselves out and tapping into their emotional history

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Speaker 1: and finding ways to let go that suits them well.

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Speaker 1: To me, that's the missing piece, Like that's what's always

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Speaker 1: been missing, Like there have always been people who try

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Speaker 1: to change the world for the better, but now we

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Speaker 1: actually have tools that help us change ourselves simultaneously. And

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Speaker 1: this is a long game, right, It's not gonna happen fast.

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Speaker 1: You know, It's not just like like, um, you know,

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Speaker 1: people talk about like things speeding up or things quickening,

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Speaker 1: and you know, but I feel like it's it's actually

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Speaker 1: it's a slow game. It's something that um, you know,

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Speaker 1: we will like radically change the way that we treat ourselves,

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Speaker 1: the way we show up in our jobs, the way

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Speaker 1: we rear our families, and that will affect you know,

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Speaker 1: the people that we raise, like the people who are

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Speaker 1: in the coming generation after us. So I have a

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Speaker 1: lot of hope. I know we have amazing challenges in

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Speaker 1: front of us that might be quite scary. But at

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Speaker 1: the same time, I don't think that there's been that

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Speaker 1: many people who are actively healing themselves on the world

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Speaker 1: right now. Never never, never, And I think a lot

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Speaker 1: about you know, something that that Deepak has has said

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Speaker 1: for a very very long time is, you know, his

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Speaker 1: mission is to get a billion people meditating so we

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Speaker 1: can reach a critical mass to shift consciousness forward. And

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Speaker 1: it feels like that is this moment, and it feels

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Speaker 1: like we're creating a new blueprint for the human of

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Speaker 1: emotional regulation. And that is something that I think has

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Speaker 1: never it has never existed in our species before. It's

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Speaker 1: not something that has ever um kind of been universally

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Speaker 1: role model, taught or shared. UM. And it's so necessary

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Speaker 1: for evolution and advancement, especially in a way that also

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Speaker 1: heals and reserves Earth as a planet to keep us alive.

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Speaker 1: So it's just it's fascinating. It's utterly fascinating watching right

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Speaker 1: now the effect in real time that even just two

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Speaker 1: years of mass collective awareness, introspection, healing is shifting UM

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Speaker 1: and will shift generations and generations of people. Yeah, I

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Speaker 1: think it's exciting. And I you know, I think a

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Speaker 1: lot about history because I love to read history. UM.

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Speaker 1: And I feel like, you know, a lot of human

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Speaker 1: history has been quite chaotic and quite dangerous. UM. But

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Speaker 1: I'd rather be born now than in another time, to

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Speaker 1: be pretty honest, right, Like, I'd rather be alive from

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Speaker 1: now um And UM. You know, like I like yeah, like,

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Speaker 1: you know, my people were like they emerged out of genocide.

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Speaker 1: You know that this world used to be quite quite

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Speaker 1: a mess. But I feel like, even though there there

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Speaker 1: are these massive challenges, I think there is more hope

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Speaker 1: than ever before. And you know, even a friend like

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Speaker 1: I literally I woke up this morning. In the first

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Speaker 1: text that I got was of a dear friend of

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Speaker 1: mine and she took her first silent ten day course

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Speaker 1: and she sent a picture and she was just beaming,

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Speaker 1: like beaming, and this is, you know, someone that I

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Speaker 1: definitely hold dear, and it's like it's just inspiring. And

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Speaker 1: I was like, you know, waking up and be like, oh, man,

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Speaker 1: like I have to wait. You know, I'm going to

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Speaker 1: do another ten day course in December, and I'm like, oh,

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Speaker 1: I have to wait all the way to December, Like

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Speaker 1: I wish I was there with her. You know. It's

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Speaker 1: also meditating, but yeah, I think these are exciting times. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's so exciting. And especially I I've noticed, like when

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Speaker 1: I'm craving meditation, when I'm like, let me try to

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Speaker 1: get an extra couple in today because it's doing so good,

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Speaker 1: I'm like, okay, yeah, this is this is a very

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Speaker 1: exciting time. So your latest book, Lighter, which I'm so

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Speaker 1: happy to have and will be in stores October four, Um,

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Speaker 1: what is what is? What is this path that we're

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Speaker 1: on with this book? Because this was I felt like

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Speaker 1: this was a whole new side of young Pueblo and

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Speaker 1: the depth was obvious. You know that that is you,

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Speaker 1: that is your essence, but there was this um m hmm.

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Speaker 1: This book really felt like a divine bridge between your

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Speaker 1: humanity and your divinity, and it created this permission um

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Speaker 1: in an even deeper way, I think, for people to

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Speaker 1: come forward in their imperfection, to grow, to expand what first? Um,

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Speaker 1: what called you to this? When did you know you

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Speaker 1: needed to write it and you needed to write it

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Speaker 1: in this way? UM? So I knew from the get

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Speaker 1: like I think when I really started taking the idea

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Speaker 1: of of writing and of sharing on Instagram, you know,

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Speaker 1: I'm talking like, um, when things first started picking up

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Speaker 1: and and getting you know, more shared and all of that,

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Speaker 1: I knew. I was like, I want to create a

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Speaker 1: book that has everything in it, that has just like

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Speaker 1: all the different reflections that I've been um, sort of

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Speaker 1: cultivating over time, and I want something that can really

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Speaker 1: sort of just traverse that whole spectrum of healing, you know,

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Speaker 1: from the beginning to like how it you know, produces

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Speaker 1: global change, um, and not just build that bridge between

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Speaker 1: personal transformation and global transformation, but it's really go deep

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Speaker 1: on the individual transformation level and just see you know

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Speaker 1: what is letting go? Like what is healing? Like, what

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Speaker 1: is emotional maturity? How does that ripple outward in your life? Um?

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Speaker 1: But then when I started talking to my editor, who

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Speaker 1: he was the one who reached out to me. And

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Speaker 1: it was funny because at first, UM, I wasn't responding

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Speaker 1: to his emails, and my literary agent she like called

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Speaker 1: me and she was like, hey, like call this guy back,

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Speaker 1: you know, like and um, and it was so good

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Speaker 1: as she's uped in because after we started having a conversation, UM,

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Speaker 1: he was like, hey, man, like you got a book

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Speaker 1: right there, you know, because I initially wanted to put

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Speaker 1: a book together, but that it wasn't you know, sort

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Speaker 1: of like a straightforward non fiction book, but just a

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Speaker 1: book of essays. And he was like, no, you can

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Speaker 1: just connect all of them. He's like, just you know,

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Speaker 1: they could just be one book. And and like a

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Speaker 1: light bulb just went off in my head and I

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Speaker 1: was like, Wow, this person is so correct, you know,

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Speaker 1: and I hadn't quite seen that before. UM. And then

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Speaker 1: when I got to writing, I was writing the book,

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Speaker 1: and UM, he helped me so much because he was

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Speaker 1: the one who kept pushing me and being like, you know,

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Speaker 1: you got to put more of your story in here.

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Speaker 1: You got to put more of your story, like you know,

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Speaker 1: people need to know and um and see um the

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Speaker 1: way that what you've understood weaves in with your personal

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Speaker 1: you know, the things that you've overcome and the challenges

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Speaker 1: that you've had. And and it was tough, you know,

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Speaker 1: it was tough revealing a lot because I've found that

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Speaker 1: I enjoy sitting quietly behind the name Young Pueblo, like

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Speaker 1: Diego just you know, sits behind Young Pueblo and it's

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Speaker 1: totally fine, and I, um, it's great, but really sort

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Speaker 1: of challenging myself to put myself out there and just

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Speaker 1: talking about, you know, the the challenges I had with

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Speaker 1: drugs and the challenges I had with poverty, and UM,

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Speaker 1: it was tough. But I'm also glad because I know,

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Speaker 1: like a lot of people are going through the same thing,

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Speaker 1: so hopefully they find it useful too. That's the piece

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Speaker 1: that I think is so important, you know. And I

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Speaker 1: think for a long time, especially where UM and for

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Speaker 1: those that have been in lineages that they now teach,

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Speaker 1: there was this kind of universal rule of not putting

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Speaker 1: your story into things. And I remember I had I

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Speaker 1: was leading UM. For for some of our educators at

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Speaker 1: a global brand that I work with in wellness, I

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Speaker 1: was leading kind of a webinar for them about how

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Speaker 1: to connect your words UM with your teachings, your experiences,

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Speaker 1: and there was this deep fear of everyone and they

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Speaker 1: all said, no, you're not supposed to put yourself in it.

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Speaker 1: That's putting ego into it. And it's like, no, not

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Speaker 1: if it's in service to humanity, because there are people

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Speaker 1: who found this path because of pain, because of arduous trials,

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Speaker 1: because of you know, a very complex lived experience. And

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Speaker 1: you need to know that people can reach this depth

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Speaker 1: of wisdom, that they can remember their soul in such

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Speaker 1: a way that have gone through hard things too, that

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Speaker 1: have gone through complex things too, that have not loved themselves.

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Speaker 1: And I think that's that's where the greatest shift is,

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Speaker 1: especially for our generation and the generation that comes after

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Speaker 1: and for people of color. That's what makes this work real.

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Speaker 1: People need it role modeled. And you know, I just

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Speaker 1: know that in your story is so powerful and I

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Speaker 1: was just really in awe and and so grateful with

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Speaker 1: the way that you chose to share so many significant

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Speaker 1: pieces about how hard it does feel even when you're healing.

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Speaker 1: And one of the things that in this book UM

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Speaker 1: in eight in in chapter eight, you're speaking to challenges

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Speaker 1: during healing. I would really love to explore that with you, Diego,

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Speaker 1: because you know, people think you start that meditation practice

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Speaker 1: and then okay, I found peace until now life has

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Speaker 1: to be peaceful, like no, no, you're just getting started.

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Speaker 1: And actually healing is exhausting and sometimes you'll resent it

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Speaker 1: and you'll want to get out of it or reinvent it.

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Speaker 1: Can you talk to me about the challenges during healing? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I think, UM, there's one challenge in particular, UM, where

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Speaker 1: you know. I also I wanted to backtrack a second

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Speaker 1: because I wanted to like piggyback on what you were

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Speaker 1: saying about sharing the story and like I am really

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Speaker 1: appreciate UM, like the Buddhist teaching, Like what the Buddha

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Speaker 1: taught to me is like so so important, and I'm

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Speaker 1: very highly influenced by UM what the Buddha has taught.

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Speaker 1: And you'll look back and everything that people know and

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Speaker 1: understand about the Buddha, especially with the earliest texts, like

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Speaker 1: they're all in reference to different points in his life.

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Speaker 1: You know that they're they're all like you're learning about

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Speaker 1: the teaching through his life. So I don't know, I

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Speaker 1: think there's something to be said about that, because yeah,

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Speaker 1: his life was just like from beginning to end, it

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Speaker 1: was like wow, like this is something that was like

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Speaker 1: it doesn't even make sense. But in my mind, I

406
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Speaker 1: think of it as positively cataclysmic, like it just like

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Speaker 1: hit the world in this massive way, in a very

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Speaker 1: good way. Yeah. But um, in terms of, you know,

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Speaker 1: the challenges during healing, I mean, I think one of

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Speaker 1: the ones that I struggled with the most was allowing

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Speaker 1: myself to evolve, you know, because when especially with the

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Speaker 1: practice that the positive practice that I'm part of and

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Speaker 1: then I do daily, it's a deconditioning practice. You know.

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Speaker 1: It's a practice of shedding, of like unbinding of just

415
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Speaker 1: not only developing more awareness, but of just a big

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Speaker 1: practice and letting go of whatever was that you were

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Speaker 1: attached to. Um. And what you'll notice is that, like

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Speaker 1: over time, like your preferences change a good amount, you know,

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Speaker 1: Like I used to love like drinking and smoking and

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Speaker 1: partying all the time, and and now I still I

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Speaker 1: still enjoy socializing, but I don't as much like I

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Speaker 1: you know, I find a lot of joy and solitude.

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Speaker 1: And I find a lot of joy just hanging out

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Speaker 1: with like you know, with my wife, or with my parents,

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Speaker 1: or or with like one or two friends at a time,

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Speaker 1: as opposed to like you know, at a party of

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Speaker 1: like a hundred people. Um. And when I realized that

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Speaker 1: those change is we're starting to happen, I was like, wow,

429
00:26:02,000 --> 00:26:04,520
Speaker 1: it's like, you know, can I actually move in this way?

430
00:26:04,560 --> 00:26:06,760
Speaker 1: Like is this even allowable? Like am I going to

431
00:26:06,880 --> 00:26:09,600
Speaker 1: lose all of my friends? You know? Am I like

432
00:26:09,920 --> 00:26:15,720
Speaker 1: can I really just like let myself become someone new? Um?

433
00:26:15,760 --> 00:26:17,760
Speaker 1: And I think it was scary at first, but then

434
00:26:17,760 --> 00:26:19,639
Speaker 1: I realized like why why why am I going to

435
00:26:19,720 --> 00:26:23,679
Speaker 1: fight my own happiness? Like if I if I'm enjoying quietness,

436
00:26:23,680 --> 00:26:26,560
Speaker 1: like let me enjoy quiet, you know, like what's quiet.

437
00:26:27,119 --> 00:26:29,880
Speaker 1: And it took a lot of time to be able

438
00:26:29,920 --> 00:26:32,240
Speaker 1: to really sort of like switch like what I mentioned before,

439
00:26:32,280 --> 00:26:34,520
Speaker 1: like switching that sense of identity to be more like

440
00:26:34,560 --> 00:26:38,720
Speaker 1: a river instead of something so static and you know, unmoving.

441
00:26:48,840 --> 00:26:52,120
Speaker 1: We had a chance to actually dive into this just

442
00:26:52,240 --> 00:26:54,520
Speaker 1: a little bit in the last episode, which I hope

443
00:26:54,560 --> 00:26:57,639
Speaker 1: everyone that is enjoying this episode has heard that episode

444
00:26:57,680 --> 00:27:02,200
Speaker 1: and if you haven't scrolled down and listen to it. Um,

445
00:27:02,240 --> 00:27:05,360
Speaker 1: But you know, one of the things that I really

446
00:27:05,400 --> 00:27:10,880
Speaker 1: love in your work is the way you speak at

447
00:27:10,920 --> 00:27:18,000
Speaker 1: such a micro level two interpersonal relationship to the way

448
00:27:18,200 --> 00:27:21,080
Speaker 1: the ways of connection, which of course your best selling book,

449
00:27:21,160 --> 00:27:25,679
Speaker 1: Clarity and Connection. But you know you've spoken a lot

450
00:27:25,720 --> 00:27:29,240
Speaker 1: about your relationship with your wife and how you both

451
00:27:29,280 --> 00:27:33,920
Speaker 1: have allowed and created this space for those different evolutions

452
00:27:33,960 --> 00:27:36,760
Speaker 1: to come and you still found yourself facing one another

453
00:27:36,800 --> 00:27:40,240
Speaker 1: and coming towards one another. Just any thoughts on that

454
00:27:40,440 --> 00:27:46,119
Speaker 1: as as one grows, as one shifts, as one heals themselves. UM,

455
00:27:46,240 --> 00:27:51,800
Speaker 1: ways to think of relationship, ways to relate to relationships. Yeah,

456
00:27:51,920 --> 00:27:55,119
Speaker 1: I love that question because it's something that I'm I

457
00:27:55,160 --> 00:27:58,400
Speaker 1: spend a lot of time thinking about now because, UM,

458
00:27:58,440 --> 00:27:59,680
Speaker 1: you know, my wife and I we used to have

459
00:27:59,720 --> 00:28:02,560
Speaker 1: a reallyationship that was just absolutely chaotic, you know, it

460
00:28:02,600 --> 00:28:07,000
Speaker 1: was it was it was I think of it the

461
00:28:07,040 --> 00:28:10,000
Speaker 1: beginning of our relationship. Those first few years were like

462
00:28:10,040 --> 00:28:13,520
Speaker 1: a hurricane. And UM, you know, once we started meditating

463
00:28:13,600 --> 00:28:17,400
Speaker 1: and once we started taking our individual transformation seriously, our

464
00:28:17,440 --> 00:28:24,639
Speaker 1: individual healing, UM, slowly, harmony started entering our our field,

465
00:28:24,680 --> 00:28:30,160
Speaker 1: our space our home and that harmony really stemmed from

466
00:28:29,680 --> 00:28:34,560
Speaker 1: us building self awareness. And you know, we've learned over

467
00:28:34,640 --> 00:28:38,880
Speaker 1: time that like like a few key things that I

468
00:28:38,880 --> 00:28:41,640
Speaker 1: think have really sort of, you know, shifted our relationship,

469
00:28:41,760 --> 00:28:44,640
Speaker 1: like one being that we really need to listen selflessly

470
00:28:44,720 --> 00:28:47,440
Speaker 1: to each other, like selflessly, like I need to be

471
00:28:47,480 --> 00:28:51,800
Speaker 1: able to just take in your perspective without immediately trying

472
00:28:51,840 --> 00:28:53,680
Speaker 1: to be like, oh but you did this, Oh but

473
00:28:53,840 --> 00:28:56,120
Speaker 1: like you know, like this is what you did to me.

474
00:28:56,480 --> 00:28:58,680
Speaker 1: It's like first, like you know, not first, but you know,

475
00:28:58,720 --> 00:29:01,680
Speaker 1: we can take turns, just like I want to hear

476
00:29:01,760 --> 00:29:04,920
Speaker 1: your perspective and then after that I'll share my perspective.

477
00:29:05,360 --> 00:29:07,080
Speaker 1: And you know what, we don't even need to pick

478
00:29:07,160 --> 00:29:10,360
Speaker 1: like who's right, Like who's right doesn't matter. What matters

479
00:29:10,440 --> 00:29:13,320
Speaker 1: is that we understand each other. And when we sort

480
00:29:13,360 --> 00:29:16,720
Speaker 1: of shift that from like winning to just being like, oh,

481
00:29:16,760 --> 00:29:18,880
Speaker 1: like why did this conflict even happen? Like what's going

482
00:29:18,920 --> 00:29:20,640
Speaker 1: on with me? And like, you know, tell me about

483
00:29:20,640 --> 00:29:23,040
Speaker 1: what's going on with you, and let's sit down and

484
00:29:23,080 --> 00:29:26,720
Speaker 1: really just like not like necessarily fix this, but let

485
00:29:26,720 --> 00:29:31,440
Speaker 1: me just understand you. I want to understand you. Um,

486
00:29:31,520 --> 00:29:34,840
Speaker 1: And that has made such a massive difference because like

487
00:29:34,840 --> 00:29:38,200
Speaker 1: we still have like moments where you know, we're like, um,

488
00:29:38,480 --> 00:29:41,280
Speaker 1: say something silly to each other or like, you know,

489
00:29:41,440 --> 00:29:45,000
Speaker 1: just some you know, points of friction. But now because

490
00:29:45,040 --> 00:29:46,920
Speaker 1: we're not trying to win, because before we used to

491
00:29:46,960 --> 00:29:48,600
Speaker 1: try to win, we used to try to be like, oh,

492
00:29:48,680 --> 00:29:51,000
Speaker 1: I'm right, and you need to apologize and you're you know,

493
00:29:51,080 --> 00:29:54,520
Speaker 1: you did this and and it's totally your fault. And

494
00:29:54,640 --> 00:29:56,080
Speaker 1: a lot of the times I would say, like the

495
00:29:56,160 --> 00:29:58,400
Speaker 1: ninety five percent of time, it's not like that at all.

496
00:29:58,600 --> 00:30:00,960
Speaker 1: What was actually happening was that I didn't feel good

497
00:30:01,040 --> 00:30:03,760
Speaker 1: or she didn't feel good. And because we're so close

498
00:30:03,760 --> 00:30:06,120
Speaker 1: to each other, it's just really easy to project onto

499
00:30:06,160 --> 00:30:10,560
Speaker 1: each other. So come to combat that. What we do

500
00:30:10,840 --> 00:30:14,680
Speaker 1: is like often in the morning, we tell each other

501
00:30:14,720 --> 00:30:17,680
Speaker 1: how we feel, you know, where we are in our

502
00:30:17,720 --> 00:30:21,560
Speaker 1: emotional spectrum, and you know, we woke up, We wake

503
00:30:21,640 --> 00:30:23,719
Speaker 1: up and you know, she lets me know if she's like, oh,

504
00:30:23,760 --> 00:30:25,760
Speaker 1: you know, I don't feel that good today, and I'm

505
00:30:25,760 --> 00:30:27,920
Speaker 1: like great, you know, like thank you for letting me know,

506
00:30:28,040 --> 00:30:30,280
Speaker 1: and like she knows, and I know, so I know

507
00:30:30,360 --> 00:30:34,280
Speaker 1: that I can support her. And you know, also like

508
00:30:34,680 --> 00:30:38,920
Speaker 1: admitting it to yourself what emotion you're passing through just

509
00:30:39,040 --> 00:30:42,960
Speaker 1: makes it. Um, it helps you like own it without

510
00:30:43,000 --> 00:30:46,320
Speaker 1: sticking to it. And just because like oftentimes we'll say,

511
00:30:46,800 --> 00:30:48,840
Speaker 1: you know, like I have a lot of anger coming up,

512
00:30:48,960 --> 00:30:50,920
Speaker 1: or a lot of like you know, sadness coming up,

513
00:30:51,000 --> 00:30:53,680
Speaker 1: or I just feel so down. Um, but it's not

514
00:30:53,720 --> 00:30:55,840
Speaker 1: like I feel down. It's more like the feeling like

515
00:30:56,200 --> 00:30:58,320
Speaker 1: you know, it's moving through me right now and I don't.

516
00:30:58,320 --> 00:31:01,120
Speaker 1: I don't, it doesn't belong to me. It's just sing by.

517
00:31:01,360 --> 00:31:05,040
Speaker 1: And UM, I think that's really just been so helpful.

518
00:31:05,160 --> 00:31:08,640
Speaker 1: And you know, it really is like a micro situation

519
00:31:08,680 --> 00:31:12,240
Speaker 1: because it's like tending to our relationship from moment to moment.

520
00:31:13,040 --> 00:31:19,240
Speaker 1: Mm hmm oh I mean that right there. Yeah, even

521
00:31:19,480 --> 00:31:22,240
Speaker 1: you know, just the idea of the safety and the

522
00:31:22,360 --> 00:31:25,280
Speaker 1: freedom and being able to just call out what is

523
00:31:25,360 --> 00:31:29,720
Speaker 1: about how impersonally feeling and it not be taken personally

524
00:31:29,960 --> 00:31:32,640
Speaker 1: or not feel like a challenge to the other person

525
00:31:33,240 --> 00:31:35,800
Speaker 1: um that you're in relationship with is so powerful and

526
00:31:35,840 --> 00:31:40,480
Speaker 1: I think it's so um it's a beautiful. It's a

527
00:31:40,480 --> 00:31:43,640
Speaker 1: beautiful role modeling. I think for a lot of people listening.

528
00:31:44,920 --> 00:31:49,360
Speaker 1: You spoke to diego, Um, you know, the way of

529
00:31:49,400 --> 00:31:52,480
Speaker 1: being that you're currently enjoying, which is you know, having

530
00:31:53,520 --> 00:31:56,520
Speaker 1: just enjoying less but deeper. It's kind of what I

531
00:31:56,600 --> 00:32:00,000
Speaker 1: heard of, you know, like it's higher quality and greedy.

532
00:32:00,040 --> 00:32:03,320
Speaker 1: It's almost that are perfect for this season, you know

533
00:32:03,480 --> 00:32:07,600
Speaker 1: of your journey and you can do with less. How

534
00:32:07,640 --> 00:32:13,480
Speaker 1: how have you related to or experienced your relationship with

535
00:32:13,640 --> 00:32:17,400
Speaker 1: your parents or family as someone that has been on

536
00:32:17,440 --> 00:32:20,320
Speaker 1: this self healing journey and that shares so much healing

537
00:32:20,360 --> 00:32:25,280
Speaker 1: with others. Um it's been. I mean it's been. It's

538
00:32:25,520 --> 00:32:29,160
Speaker 1: really beautiful, Like in two ways. I feel like, UM,

539
00:32:29,160 --> 00:32:35,080
Speaker 1: with my dad, you know, we have like just this

540
00:32:35,160 --> 00:32:38,760
Speaker 1: profoundly loving relationship, Like we've always had this really really

541
00:32:38,800 --> 00:32:43,000
Speaker 1: deep connection, UM, but now it's more vocal than it

542
00:32:43,080 --> 00:32:46,520
Speaker 1: was before. UM because like he always, you know, would

543
00:32:46,560 --> 00:32:49,120
Speaker 1: take care of us and make sure we're you know,

544
00:32:49,200 --> 00:32:52,560
Speaker 1: we have the what we need to survive. UM. But

545
00:32:52,800 --> 00:32:55,240
Speaker 1: now like it's so easy to just tell him like

546
00:32:55,280 --> 00:32:57,280
Speaker 1: I love him, and he tells me he loves me,

547
00:32:57,360 --> 00:33:01,680
Speaker 1: and and I think it's it, you know, h I

548
00:33:01,720 --> 00:33:04,480
Speaker 1: think when when I started healing myself and I really

549
00:33:04,520 --> 00:33:06,680
Speaker 1: took a moment to just really let him know that

550
00:33:06,720 --> 00:33:09,760
Speaker 1: I love him. A lot um it thinks change. And

551
00:33:09,760 --> 00:33:12,320
Speaker 1: I remember like this one particular moment where I hugged

552
00:33:12,400 --> 00:33:14,440
Speaker 1: him tightly and was like, you know, I really love

553
00:33:14,480 --> 00:33:16,600
Speaker 1: you and love you so grateful for everything you've done

554
00:33:16,600 --> 00:33:21,240
Speaker 1: for us. And now he's just much more open then

555
00:33:21,280 --> 00:33:23,240
Speaker 1: he used to be. And I don't know if it

556
00:33:23,440 --> 00:33:26,120
Speaker 1: helped him like you know, put his guard down, just

557
00:33:26,160 --> 00:33:31,040
Speaker 1: disarm himself. Um, but I see him vocalizing his love

558
00:33:31,200 --> 00:33:34,240
Speaker 1: for like more of our family now, you know, for

559
00:33:34,520 --> 00:33:37,360
Speaker 1: my cousins and Ecuador, and you know, we have like

560
00:33:37,400 --> 00:33:40,360
Speaker 1: a chat group with everybody. And he's always like, you know,

561
00:33:40,440 --> 00:33:44,240
Speaker 1: he's always been a really like, uh funny and it

562
00:33:44,320 --> 00:33:46,760
Speaker 1: makes a lot of jokes, but there's just even more

563
00:33:46,880 --> 00:33:50,840
Speaker 1: love now behind what he does. And he just like

564
00:33:50,920 --> 00:33:56,000
Speaker 1: actively is like, yeah, he just loves his family. And

565
00:33:56,040 --> 00:33:58,040
Speaker 1: I think part of that, you know, it's his own

566
00:33:58,040 --> 00:33:59,880
Speaker 1: work too that he's doing, but part of that kind

567
00:34:00,080 --> 00:34:03,560
Speaker 1: uh like rippled out from me just being a little

568
00:34:03,600 --> 00:34:06,640
Speaker 1: more open with him, I think, like eight years back,

569
00:34:07,320 --> 00:34:11,880
Speaker 1: and I think similarly with my mom. I feel like

570
00:34:11,880 --> 00:34:15,120
Speaker 1: we're able to like talk a lot more like a

571
00:34:15,200 --> 00:34:18,560
Speaker 1: lot more openly now that we you know, weren't able

572
00:34:18,600 --> 00:34:22,640
Speaker 1: to before because in the past, UM, our family relationship

573
00:34:22,760 --> 00:34:25,839
Speaker 1: was much more about survival right, Like we were we

574
00:34:25,840 --> 00:34:29,560
Speaker 1: were fighting through poverty together and and my mom and

575
00:34:29,640 --> 00:34:33,080
Speaker 1: dad were like constantly busy, constantly tired because they were

576
00:34:33,120 --> 00:34:36,200
Speaker 1: just working so hard. My mom she um used to

577
00:34:36,200 --> 00:34:41,880
Speaker 1: clean houses, and my dad, um, he worked in supermarkets.

578
00:34:41,960 --> 00:34:44,760
Speaker 1: And you know, we were stuck in that American poverty

579
00:34:44,800 --> 00:34:46,759
Speaker 1: trap where it was just like it's going to be

580
00:34:46,840 --> 00:34:50,440
Speaker 1: really hard for you to pull yourself out of that. UM.

581
00:34:50,480 --> 00:34:51,920
Speaker 1: So I think a lot of times, like there was

582
00:34:51,920 --> 00:34:53,600
Speaker 1: definitely a lot of love in my family, but it

583
00:34:53,680 --> 00:34:56,680
Speaker 1: was like, you know, that that tension of like how

584
00:34:56,719 --> 00:34:58,640
Speaker 1: are we going to pay the rent next? And how

585
00:34:58,640 --> 00:35:02,520
Speaker 1: are we going to get food on the table type stuff. Um.

586
00:35:02,719 --> 00:35:05,480
Speaker 1: But now that there's a lot less of that because

587
00:35:06,000 --> 00:35:08,880
Speaker 1: you know, I'm older and I can help support my parents,

588
00:35:08,920 --> 00:35:12,759
Speaker 1: and my brother and sister are also older and they

589
00:35:12,800 --> 00:35:14,919
Speaker 1: have their jobs, and you know, we can all sort

590
00:35:14,960 --> 00:35:17,560
Speaker 1: of take care of each other better. Um. There's less

591
00:35:17,560 --> 00:35:20,520
Speaker 1: pressure on my mom and dad now, and they I

592
00:35:20,520 --> 00:35:23,640
Speaker 1: can you know, we can actively see that because they

593
00:35:23,760 --> 00:35:26,200
Speaker 1: don't fight with each other. You know, like when like

594
00:35:26,280 --> 00:35:29,520
Speaker 1: when we were a little um, they would fight often,

595
00:35:29,600 --> 00:35:31,719
Speaker 1: but it wasn't because they disliked each other, but it

596
00:35:31,800 --> 00:35:34,880
Speaker 1: was because they had no one else to project their

597
00:35:34,880 --> 00:35:41,000
Speaker 1: attention onto because they were so stressed out about money. UM.

598
00:35:41,080 --> 00:35:44,239
Speaker 1: But yeah, I think, Um, the other thing that's been

599
00:35:44,239 --> 00:35:47,080
Speaker 1: special with you know, especially with the relationship with my mom,

600
00:35:47,239 --> 00:35:50,920
Speaker 1: is that, UM, I tell her a lot about the

601
00:35:51,000 --> 00:35:54,239
Speaker 1: meditation journey and about like what I'm learning and you know,

602
00:35:54,320 --> 00:35:57,120
Speaker 1: what I go through during retreats, and I think it's

603
00:35:57,160 --> 00:36:02,239
Speaker 1: really like expand her sense of spirituality, UM, where you know,

604
00:36:02,360 --> 00:36:05,799
Speaker 1: she feels like how deep our connection is. And you know,

605
00:36:05,880 --> 00:36:08,880
Speaker 1: even though she like she's you know, she loves Jesus

606
00:36:08,880 --> 00:36:12,200
Speaker 1: and goes to charge every Sunday, she also starting to

607
00:36:12,239 --> 00:36:14,920
Speaker 1: expand her idea of like, um, you know, was this

608
00:36:15,080 --> 00:36:16,959
Speaker 1: just one life? Like you know, I feel like because

609
00:36:16,960 --> 00:36:18,799
Speaker 1: she also feels like we've all known each other from

610
00:36:18,840 --> 00:36:28,200
Speaker 1: multiple lives too. Wow, I'm like, Mama gonna love christ consciousness,

611
00:36:29,520 --> 00:36:34,120
Speaker 1: I know. Yeah, as time keeps going, Yeah, she's evolving

612
00:36:35,320 --> 00:36:39,200
Speaker 1: as you were. M m hmm. I feel like a

613
00:36:39,239 --> 00:36:43,680
Speaker 1: lot coming into my heart right now. I got chills, UM.

614
00:36:43,719 --> 00:36:45,560
Speaker 1: And one of the parts of what you were saying,

615
00:36:45,680 --> 00:36:50,040
Speaker 1: because I instantly felt the grace that's available right now

616
00:36:50,120 --> 00:36:53,399
Speaker 1: for those listening, and the compassion that's available as we

617
00:36:53,520 --> 00:37:00,479
Speaker 1: look at the structures of our family, because, um, it's

618
00:37:00,480 --> 00:37:05,000
Speaker 1: really important for a lot of us, especially in communities

619
00:37:05,000 --> 00:37:08,480
Speaker 1: of color, and in communities of color in America where

620
00:37:08,520 --> 00:37:15,239
Speaker 1: there is so much, so much, so much structural oppression everywhere.

621
00:37:19,719 --> 00:37:25,279
Speaker 1: You said, um, you were talking about the way your

622
00:37:25,360 --> 00:37:29,320
Speaker 1: parents really didn't have a choice in experiencing one another

623
00:37:29,560 --> 00:37:33,240
Speaker 1: and projecting of the stresses that they were feeling because

624
00:37:33,239 --> 00:37:35,000
Speaker 1: of the world that they lived in. And I just

625
00:37:35,080 --> 00:37:38,680
Speaker 1: think how many of our family structures, you know, even

626
00:37:38,719 --> 00:37:41,680
Speaker 1: as we explore therapy, right even as we unpack our

627
00:37:41,719 --> 00:37:49,680
Speaker 1: personal journeys, um as we use terms, even as dysfunctional

628
00:37:49,800 --> 00:37:54,680
Speaker 1: family systems kind of coming into a new view that

629
00:37:54,719 --> 00:37:59,880
Speaker 1: includes more compassion about how it felt for our parents,

630
00:38:00,000 --> 00:38:03,239
Speaker 1: for our family members to live in those times, and

631
00:38:03,280 --> 00:38:06,880
Speaker 1: what that did to their personalities, what that did to

632
00:38:06,920 --> 00:38:10,120
Speaker 1: the way they felt about themselves, what they did, what

633
00:38:10,280 --> 00:38:13,600
Speaker 1: that did to the way they were able to voice

634
00:38:13,600 --> 00:38:16,000
Speaker 1: and share how they felt about us. That's that's just

635
00:38:16,080 --> 00:38:19,680
Speaker 1: so powerful. Yeah, I love that you're pulling on a thread,

636
00:38:19,719 --> 00:38:26,000
Speaker 1: because one effect can have a lot of causes, and

637
00:38:26,320 --> 00:38:31,960
Speaker 1: you know, just you know, the same way that you know,

638
00:38:32,120 --> 00:38:37,120
Speaker 1: someone could have struggled like with their parents, UM, and

639
00:38:37,160 --> 00:38:40,960
Speaker 1: then we're feeling that sort of intergenerational struggle and pinching

640
00:38:40,960 --> 00:38:46,520
Speaker 1: on us. UM. There are these like social economic pressures

641
00:38:46,560 --> 00:38:48,880
Speaker 1: that are pushing upon our families too, Like it's literally

642
00:38:48,880 --> 00:38:51,160
Speaker 1: like pressure. Like I think of it almost like when

643
00:38:51,200 --> 00:38:56,359
Speaker 1: I picture my family sort of navigating UM America and

644
00:38:56,400 --> 00:38:58,480
Speaker 1: like all of us as immigrants, all of us like

645
00:38:59,000 --> 00:39:03,359
Speaker 1: you know now being like in a space that UM

646
00:39:03,360 --> 00:39:05,920
Speaker 1: where we're you know, we're like our having our brown

647
00:39:05,960 --> 00:39:10,480
Speaker 1: skin like it um and struggling through poverty. It felt

648
00:39:10,520 --> 00:39:12,640
Speaker 1: like we were like in a submarine and you know

649
00:39:12,680 --> 00:39:16,440
Speaker 1: we're like the pressure just keeps pushing in and you

650
00:39:16,480 --> 00:39:19,279
Speaker 1: can hear the metal crack and like you know, you're

651
00:39:19,320 --> 00:39:23,719
Speaker 1: worried that you're just gonna get crushed. UM. And we

652
00:39:23,719 --> 00:39:26,520
Speaker 1: were fortunate, We were fortunate to have not gotten crushed.

653
00:39:26,520 --> 00:39:29,040
Speaker 1: But I've seen a lot of other you know, families

654
00:39:29,080 --> 00:39:34,760
Speaker 1: of beautiful families, bright people who you know, like tough

655
00:39:34,800 --> 00:39:37,120
Speaker 1: things happened to them, you know, like having some of

656
00:39:37,120 --> 00:39:40,000
Speaker 1: their children go to jail or I don't know, just

657
00:39:40,040 --> 00:39:41,920
Speaker 1: like having you know, people like I remember when I

658
00:39:41,920 --> 00:39:45,440
Speaker 1: went to high school UM in Boston Public schools UM

659
00:39:45,520 --> 00:39:48,359
Speaker 1: during that time, if you were Latin X, you had

660
00:39:48,360 --> 00:39:51,799
Speaker 1: a fifty percent chance of graduating, so that that means

661
00:39:51,800 --> 00:39:54,439
Speaker 1: like one and two like you know, like literally like

662
00:39:54,880 --> 00:39:57,720
Speaker 1: there's two people, only one of you made it. And

663
00:39:58,640 --> 00:40:01,160
Speaker 1: like that type of pressure was wild, like how people

664
00:40:01,200 --> 00:40:03,600
Speaker 1: were just falling out left and right. I remember when

665
00:40:03,640 --> 00:40:09,760
Speaker 1: we graduated high school, like our you know, our class

666
00:40:09,920 --> 00:40:12,799
Speaker 1: was so much smaller than what it started with, and

667
00:40:12,960 --> 00:40:15,560
Speaker 1: it's like what, you know, how then the amount of

668
00:40:15,600 --> 00:40:17,520
Speaker 1: people that we originally started with, and it was sad

669
00:40:17,560 --> 00:40:20,400
Speaker 1: because we were you know, I went to a school

670
00:40:20,719 --> 00:40:25,040
Speaker 1: UM that was really diverse, like really really diverse, Like

671
00:40:25,480 --> 00:40:28,800
Speaker 1: that school probably only had like maybe like thirty percent

672
00:40:28,880 --> 00:40:31,080
Speaker 1: white people, but then you had like, you know, a

673
00:40:31,280 --> 00:40:36,479
Speaker 1: huge number of um like Caribbean people, like a lot

674
00:40:36,560 --> 00:40:39,719
Speaker 1: of people from like Vietnam, a lot of people from

675
00:40:39,760 --> 00:40:43,000
Speaker 1: all over South America. So we're talking like, you know,

676
00:40:43,920 --> 00:40:45,640
Speaker 1: you get like a little piece of the world in

677
00:40:45,680 --> 00:40:50,120
Speaker 1: this school that's diverse. Yeah, and it was it was great,

678
00:40:50,200 --> 00:40:54,120
Speaker 1: you know, UM, it was wonderful being able to be

679
00:40:54,160 --> 00:40:57,040
Speaker 1: in that environment UM as a young person. But but

680
00:40:57,120 --> 00:41:00,000
Speaker 1: it was also tough seeing that like at my school

681
00:41:00,080 --> 00:41:02,759
Speaker 1: to like everybody had a job, you know, like we

682
00:41:02,760 --> 00:41:05,200
Speaker 1: were all like fourteen fifteen, like everybody had a job

683
00:41:05,239 --> 00:41:08,480
Speaker 1: because like nobody's parents had money like that. And I

684
00:41:08,480 --> 00:41:12,040
Speaker 1: remember having one friend who while he was in high school,

685
00:41:12,080 --> 00:41:15,560
Speaker 1: he was literally still working forty hours a week and

686
00:41:16,120 --> 00:41:19,520
Speaker 1: and it was like, you know, people were just hustling

687
00:41:19,560 --> 00:41:22,080
Speaker 1: because that's what you know, we had no other option,

688
00:41:22,200 --> 00:41:24,719
Speaker 1: Like we weren't just able to have like tons of

689
00:41:24,760 --> 00:41:26,800
Speaker 1: extracurriculars and all that stuff. I was like, now we

690
00:41:26,840 --> 00:41:29,399
Speaker 1: need to make money because or else working on just

691
00:41:29,560 --> 00:41:34,239
Speaker 1: be hungry. Wow. And these are the things that we

692
00:41:34,400 --> 00:41:37,640
Speaker 1: all have to really be investigating on a healing journey,

693
00:41:37,760 --> 00:41:40,800
Speaker 1: you know. I think for for this generation that's called

694
00:41:40,800 --> 00:41:43,759
Speaker 1: to this awakened path, I think many of us recognized

695
00:41:43,800 --> 00:41:47,680
Speaker 1: were healing backwards, and we're healing forwards. Right. We're setting

696
00:41:47,680 --> 00:41:50,920
Speaker 1: our parents and our grandparents free through the healing that

697
00:41:51,000 --> 00:41:54,000
Speaker 1: we embody, right, not just learned, but the healing that

698
00:41:54,080 --> 00:41:58,200
Speaker 1: we embody. And then we're changing the trajectory of the future.

699
00:41:58,480 --> 00:42:02,279
Speaker 1: And these are these are the lenses we also have

700
00:42:02,440 --> 00:42:05,200
Speaker 1: to look for. We have to be able on this

701
00:42:05,280 --> 00:42:08,920
Speaker 1: journey to hold multiple truths that want especially about our

702
00:42:08,920 --> 00:42:14,360
Speaker 1: own family systems and the true depth of role that

703
00:42:14,560 --> 00:42:17,640
Speaker 1: the environments you live in place on you, the layering

704
00:42:17,680 --> 00:42:23,160
Speaker 1: that that does in this experience. UM wow wow, Yeah,

705
00:42:23,200 --> 00:42:25,480
Speaker 1: I think it's um. You know, I love that the

706
00:42:25,520 --> 00:42:28,160
Speaker 1: direction of our conversation is going into because it makes

707
00:42:28,160 --> 00:42:31,560
Speaker 1: me think a lot about how, like obviously, our world

708
00:42:31,680 --> 00:42:36,000
Speaker 1: right now functions in a way where profit is most important. Um.

709
00:42:36,040 --> 00:42:40,040
Speaker 1: But I'm hoping that like, out of this healing generation

710
00:42:40,080 --> 00:42:46,239
Speaker 1: can come a new sort of motivation, and that motivation

711
00:42:46,280 --> 00:42:51,280
Speaker 1: being um uplifting human dignity. Right, So like human dignity

712
00:42:51,440 --> 00:42:53,560
Speaker 1: as like, Okay, this is how we're going to try

713
00:42:53,560 --> 00:42:55,320
Speaker 1: to design our society. This is how we're going to

714
00:42:55,400 --> 00:43:00,080
Speaker 1: try to make things structurally compassionate. UM. And I think

715
00:43:00,160 --> 00:43:03,600
Speaker 1: you know that doesn't mean like solving everyone's problem or

716
00:43:03,920 --> 00:43:06,760
Speaker 1: you know, no one being wealthy anymore, because that's that's

717
00:43:06,800 --> 00:43:08,960
Speaker 1: a lot of the fears is that you know, things

718
00:43:09,040 --> 00:43:12,200
Speaker 1: will immediately go to an extreme and like, you know,

719
00:43:12,280 --> 00:43:14,480
Speaker 1: people who are really wealthy are afraid of losing all

720
00:43:14,480 --> 00:43:18,880
Speaker 1: their wealth, or you know, people like who are very

721
00:43:19,000 --> 00:43:22,240
Speaker 1: you know, love their individualism are afraid of losing their individualism.

722
00:43:22,280 --> 00:43:24,680
Speaker 1: But it's more so about balance it's about, you know,

723
00:43:25,080 --> 00:43:28,239
Speaker 1: protecting the rights of the individual so that they may yeah,

724
00:43:28,280 --> 00:43:30,239
Speaker 1: they may profit from the things that they create. But

725
00:43:30,280 --> 00:43:33,240
Speaker 1: at the same time, we deeply understand that we are

726
00:43:33,239 --> 00:43:36,880
Speaker 1: we are a collective, um, and that we should treat

727
00:43:36,880 --> 00:43:41,680
Speaker 1: each other as such, and by caring for one another, right,

728
00:43:42,040 --> 00:43:45,400
Speaker 1: it actually uplifts my own happiness. Like it's hard for

729
00:43:45,840 --> 00:43:49,440
Speaker 1: me to enjoy like, um, you know whatever, I've a

730
00:43:49,520 --> 00:43:52,280
Speaker 1: mass for myself. If I know that a few blocks

731
00:43:52,280 --> 00:43:56,120
Speaker 1: down someone's hungry and starving, right, Like, that's obviously going

732
00:43:56,160 --> 00:43:59,560
Speaker 1: to impede in your happiness. So if we're able to

733
00:43:59,600 --> 00:44:06,040
Speaker 1: support each other and meeting people's material needs, then I think, um,

734
00:44:06,160 --> 00:44:08,839
Speaker 1: we'll all be collectively happier. And I think it's hard.

735
00:44:08,880 --> 00:44:10,960
Speaker 1: You know, that's gonna it's gonna take decades to be

736
00:44:11,040 --> 00:44:13,200
Speaker 1: able to solve that and to be able to see like,

737
00:44:13,600 --> 00:44:16,360
Speaker 1: oh yeah, we should sort of expand our idea of

738
00:44:16,400 --> 00:44:18,920
Speaker 1: human rights, and we should. You know, everyone should have

739
00:44:18,960 --> 00:44:21,440
Speaker 1: access to good schools, everyone should have access to food,

740
00:44:21,440 --> 00:44:24,640
Speaker 1: into housing, and um, we're not going to just, you know,

741
00:44:25,400 --> 00:44:28,200
Speaker 1: like I said, solve everything for everyone, but we're going

742
00:44:28,280 --> 00:44:32,680
Speaker 1: to create a new benchmark and uplift that benchmark, so that, um,

743
00:44:32,680 --> 00:44:46,440
Speaker 1: everyone is more cared for than before. Mike drop yeah, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

744
00:44:47,560 --> 00:44:50,319
Speaker 1: What are you hoping, um, that everyone that gets this

745
00:44:50,360 --> 00:44:54,640
Speaker 1: book walks away with Oh, I hope inspiration. I hope

746
00:44:54,680 --> 00:44:58,080
Speaker 1: that they I hope this is the type of book

747
00:44:58,120 --> 00:45:01,759
Speaker 1: that make so you reflect on how far you've come.

748
00:45:02,360 --> 00:45:04,799
Speaker 1: It makes you like, you know, once you're done with it,

749
00:45:04,840 --> 00:45:06,479
Speaker 1: you close it and you're like, all right, I'm ready

750
00:45:06,520 --> 00:45:08,720
Speaker 1: to go back in. You know, I'm ready. I'm ready

751
00:45:08,760 --> 00:45:11,279
Speaker 1: to keep on binding. I'm ready to keep you know,

752
00:45:11,480 --> 00:45:15,040
Speaker 1: doing all this shedding work. Because like that's why I

753
00:45:15,120 --> 00:45:17,320
Speaker 1: name the book Lighter. You know, it's not just about

754
00:45:17,440 --> 00:45:21,040
Speaker 1: like I really fundamentally believe that enlightenment is possible, like people,

755
00:45:21,040 --> 00:45:23,560
Speaker 1: there are people out there who are enlightened and and

756
00:45:23,600 --> 00:45:27,160
Speaker 1: it's possible for the human being. But um, what's more

757
00:45:27,160 --> 00:45:30,960
Speaker 1: accessible that than that is becoming lighter. Like, you know,

758
00:45:31,040 --> 00:45:33,960
Speaker 1: we carry this deep, this heaviness of the past, and

759
00:45:34,000 --> 00:45:37,040
Speaker 1: we're repeating the past over and over again through our reactions.

760
00:45:37,719 --> 00:45:39,479
Speaker 1: And when you become aware of that and you start

761
00:45:39,560 --> 00:45:43,359
Speaker 1: on binding those habit patterns, you feel lighter. Your mind

762
00:45:43,400 --> 00:45:46,200
Speaker 1: feels lighter, your mind feels clearer, you can connect with

763
00:45:46,239 --> 00:45:49,160
Speaker 1: people better. And UM, I think if we keep doing

764
00:45:49,200 --> 00:45:53,239
Speaker 1: that deep personal work, UM, it's going to be easier

765
00:45:53,280 --> 00:45:57,400
Speaker 1: to align with our align ourselves with um good movements

766
00:45:57,440 --> 00:46:00,440
Speaker 1: that are helping, you know, make the all into a

767
00:46:00,440 --> 00:46:04,160
Speaker 1: better place, or just good actions in our neighborhoods and

768
00:46:04,200 --> 00:46:08,440
Speaker 1: just like adding to the to that structural compassion that

769
00:46:08,480 --> 00:46:13,480
Speaker 1: we really need to build. Wow. Wow, Wow, everyone go

770
00:46:13,920 --> 00:46:17,360
Speaker 1: get this book. I'm pretty certain that everyone listening to

771
00:46:17,480 --> 00:46:21,480
Speaker 1: this show already follows you on Instagram. But if you don't, everyone,

772
00:46:22,120 --> 00:46:26,840
Speaker 1: young Pueblo on I G get your life. It is um.

773
00:46:26,920 --> 00:46:30,560
Speaker 1: The reflections always mean the world to me and almost

774
00:46:30,600 --> 00:46:35,560
Speaker 1: everything that catches my eye as I'm scrolling from you

775
00:46:35,800 --> 00:46:39,919
Speaker 1: it I'm like, oh, oh okay, spiritual surgery went straight

776
00:46:39,920 --> 00:46:42,640
Speaker 1: into the heart. Yes, I feel that, Yes, I connect

777
00:46:42,680 --> 00:46:47,640
Speaker 1: with that. Your latest book is now on sale, will

778
00:46:47,680 --> 00:46:49,680
Speaker 1: be out in stores depending on when you hear this

779
00:46:49,719 --> 00:46:54,480
Speaker 1: episode by the top of October. It is called Lighter

780
00:46:55,040 --> 00:46:56,600
Speaker 1: And if you haven't yet, you got to get the

781
00:46:56,640 --> 00:46:59,880
Speaker 1: O G to Clarity in Connection and Pueblo, thank you

782
00:47:00,200 --> 00:47:03,600
Speaker 1: so much, Diego my friend. Thank you so much for

783
00:47:03,680 --> 00:47:08,240
Speaker 1: joining us again, and thank you for sharing yourself it's

784
00:47:08,239 --> 00:47:12,120
Speaker 1: such a complete and open way. Um, this is going

785
00:47:12,239 --> 00:47:16,160
Speaker 1: to I just know, change the scope of so many

786
00:47:16,160 --> 00:47:19,640
Speaker 1: people's lives and what is possible for them. Thank you

787
00:47:19,719 --> 00:47:23,759
Speaker 1: so much too, Honestly, it's UM, it's incredible when when

788
00:47:23,800 --> 00:47:26,200
Speaker 1: you and I talk, it's just like time moves so fast,

789
00:47:26,239 --> 00:47:29,880
Speaker 1: and I'm always so grateful. UM. But yeah, thank you

790
00:47:29,960 --> 00:47:32,759
Speaker 1: for everything that you're doing for the world and just

791
00:47:32,840 --> 00:47:34,680
Speaker 1: the light that you're bringing forward. I think it's going

792
00:47:34,719 --> 00:47:37,120
Speaker 1: to help a lot of us. So thank you, m

793
00:47:37,760 --> 00:47:40,279
Speaker 1: thank you. I love you, my friend. Cannot wait to

794
00:47:40,320 --> 00:47:46,120
Speaker 1: see you in person. Likewise, so much love. Elevated Conversation,

795
00:47:46,360 --> 00:47:49,759
Speaker 1: my jam. Such a pleasure as always to have young

796
00:47:49,840 --> 00:47:54,239
Speaker 1: Pueblo Diego Perez on the show in conversation. You haven't yet,

797
00:47:54,360 --> 00:47:56,879
Speaker 1: you got to check out the last episode we did

798
00:47:56,920 --> 00:47:59,919
Speaker 1: as well in season two and head to My Into

799
00:48:00,000 --> 00:48:02,520
Speaker 1: a Ground. We had a couple of really amazing conversations

800
00:48:02,560 --> 00:48:04,760
Speaker 1: on i G Live. If you look in my videos

801
00:48:04,880 --> 00:48:10,120
Speaker 1: at Devy Brown, go get this book. Make sure you

802
00:48:10,160 --> 00:48:12,840
Speaker 1: have a journal close so that you're as you're reading

803
00:48:12,880 --> 00:48:16,839
Speaker 1: Diego's powerful words, you're also able to connect to the

804
00:48:16,920 --> 00:48:20,319
Speaker 1: words that are longing to be expressed from your own

805
00:48:20,360 --> 00:48:22,879
Speaker 1: heart and soul. And if you get a chance, if

806
00:48:22,920 --> 00:48:26,680
Speaker 1: you connected to this episode, I highly recommend consider sharing

807
00:48:26,719 --> 00:48:29,839
Speaker 1: it with three people. Maybe someone that you know could

808
00:48:29,920 --> 00:48:34,600
Speaker 1: really use this, someone that you know is right on

809
00:48:34,760 --> 00:48:39,840
Speaker 1: track with a conversation like this, um and maybe someone

810
00:48:39,880 --> 00:48:43,319
Speaker 1: in your family system or someone that you want to

811
00:48:43,360 --> 00:48:45,560
Speaker 1: have a deeper connection with. This could be a great

812
00:48:45,600 --> 00:48:51,160
Speaker 1: opportunity to start that conversation. Alright, much love everyone from listening.

813
00:48:51,400 --> 00:48:53,719
Speaker 1: We will be back here next week. Go ahead and

814
00:48:53,800 --> 00:48:57,040
Speaker 1: drop a rating and review. If you have a moment

815
00:48:57,120 --> 00:49:02,440
Speaker 1: in the Apple store, big love, i' must say hey,

816
00:49:02,440 --> 00:49:06,200
Speaker 1: find me on social Let's connect at Debbie Brown. That's

817
00:49:06,280 --> 00:49:09,480
Speaker 1: Twitter and Instagram, or go to my website Debbie Brown

818
00:49:09,840 --> 00:49:12,360
Speaker 1: dot com. And if you're listening to the show on

819
00:49:12,400 --> 00:49:18,120
Speaker 1: Apple Podcasts, please please please don't forget to rate, review,

820
00:49:18,719 --> 00:49:23,240
Speaker 1: and subscribe and send this episode to a friend. Dropping

821
00:49:23,320 --> 00:49:25,520
Speaker 1: JIMS is the production of I Heart Radio and The

822
00:49:25,560 --> 00:49:28,719
Speaker 1: Black Effect Network. It's produced by Jack Please and me

823
00:49:29,080 --> 00:49:32,480
Speaker 1: Debbie Brown. For more podcasts from My Heart Radio, visit

824
00:49:32,520 --> 00:49:36,040
Speaker 1: the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you

825
00:49:36,120 --> 00:49:37,440
Speaker 1: listen to your favorite shows.