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Speaker 1: I'm so much more than what people probably think and

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Speaker 1: when they look at me, especially at that young age

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Speaker 1: and that position situation I was in. For me, it

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Speaker 1: was like just I had no doubt in myself.

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Speaker 2: Welcome to Off the Cup, my personal anti anxiety antidote.

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Speaker 2: I'm excited for this one.

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Speaker 3: I love all of.

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Speaker 2: Our interview guests, of course, but this is a person

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Speaker 2: who I don't know, but I really admire, and not

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Speaker 2: just for her work and you know her from huge,

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Speaker 2: huge television shows like nine O, two and zero and

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Speaker 2: What I Like About You and so many others, but

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Speaker 2: for the bravery and wisdom she's shown in deciding very

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Speaker 2: intentionally and I think courageously to talk about the things

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Speaker 2: that can be hard to talk about, especially as women, motherhood, divorce,

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Speaker 2: mental health, reinventing, I love and hate that word, but

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Speaker 2: we'll get into it up aging. There's so much and

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Speaker 2: this is what matters. These are the things that matters.

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Speaker 2: This is what the human condition's about, what we're all

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Speaker 2: going through, and so I'm so glad that she does

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Speaker 2: that on her iHeart podcast I Choose Me with Jenny

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Speaker 2: Garth and in her upcoming book I Choose Me Coming

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Speaker 2: Out in April twenty twenty six.

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Speaker 3: Welcome to Off the Cup, Jenny Garth. How are you.

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Speaker 3: I'm good. I'm really glad you're here.

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Speaker 1: I'm glad i'm here too. You know what, every time

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Speaker 1: I wake up, I say, I'm glad I'm here.

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Speaker 2: All right, There's so much I want to talk to

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Speaker 2: you about, and I love what you're doing. I'm I'm

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Speaker 2: in the middle of writing a mental health book about

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Speaker 2: mine and it's so hard. I'm used to writing about

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Speaker 2: politics and other people. Did you find it hard to

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Speaker 2: sort of expose yourself in this way?

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Speaker 1: Gosh, well, it's weird because I've lived so much of

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Speaker 1: my previous life with my eyes down and hat down

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Speaker 1: and looking down and trying not to connect and trying

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Speaker 1: to out. Someone labeled me a happy recluse once when

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Speaker 1: I was in my early twenties, and that really stuck

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Speaker 1: with me, and I decided that's who I am for

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Speaker 1: the rest of my life. And so I just stopped

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Speaker 1: connecting with people outside of my home and I decided

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Speaker 1: I was done with that. I just decided I'm fifty

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Speaker 1: three now, I've been through a lot. I have so

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Speaker 1: many things i'd like to share with other women who

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Speaker 1: are going through similar things. I've learned that social media

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Speaker 1: can be a terrible thing for my brain, but it

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Speaker 1: can also be a great thing because it has inspired

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Speaker 1: me to stay connected with people. People I don't know,

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Speaker 1: people who comment, people who I run into that say

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Speaker 1: they follow me or whatever. I feel a strong connection

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Speaker 1: with them because we are sharing things that you don't

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Speaker 1: just share with people on the street, you know, Like

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Speaker 1: I'm choosing to let people into my life in a

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Speaker 1: way that I probably haven't even let my sisters in

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Speaker 1: this closely over you know, I mean, after all the

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Speaker 1: years and all the changes and all the distance between us,

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Speaker 1: Like I just felt like it was a time for

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Speaker 1: me to get back to connecting with people and see

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Speaker 1: how that felt. And so far it's felt amazing.

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Speaker 3: I love that, and I love hearing that.

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Speaker 2: I want to get into some of those really meaty

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Speaker 2: issues that you get into, but first I always like

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Speaker 2: to start by asking what were you like as a kid?

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Speaker 1: I was the baby of the family. It was his

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Speaker 1: hers and ours. I was the ours, so I was

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Speaker 1: spoiled rotten. And now I have a daughter who's the

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Speaker 1: baby of the family and she spoiled rotten. So it's

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Speaker 1: all making sense for me now in completely different ways,

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Speaker 1: and I'm like, ooh, yeah, I'm spoiling her.

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Speaker 3: Oops.

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Speaker 1: And to the other ones, I'm like sorry, right, but

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Speaker 1: I was spoiled. And I grew up on a farm,

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Speaker 1: and you know, I rode a pink, huffy dirt bike. Yep,

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Speaker 1: I played by myself. I rode my bike through the

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Speaker 1: cemetery that was on our property. I loved talking to

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Speaker 1: dead people, picking flowers for all the gravestones. I had

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Speaker 1: animals all around me. It was like some sort of

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Speaker 1: fairy tale, quite honestly. And I had, you know, a

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Speaker 1: bunch of sisters running around and it was just a

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Speaker 1: very idyllic, quiet, lovely childhood. Thank you Mom and Dad.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I grew up with steps as well.

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Speaker 2: And was there any tension between you and your step siblings.

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Speaker 1: No. I think my older sisters were so happy to

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Speaker 1: be in this new family with my dad, John Garth,

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Speaker 1: and he sort of enveloped us all. He adopted them all.

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Speaker 1: You know, we were just so happy to be together,

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Speaker 1: and there was not I mean, I would get out

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Speaker 1: of doing chores a lot because we had a horse farm,

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Speaker 1: horse ranch, and so I would like be like, hey, listen,

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Speaker 1: I'm not into cleaning the shit up today? Can't I

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Speaker 1: make you a pie? I would do my I would

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Speaker 1: barter with my sisters in order for them to not

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Speaker 1: beat me up or give me wedgies.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Nice, So it's always nice as an option to pay

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Speaker 2: someone off. So you get to Arizona, you leave Illinois,

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Speaker 2: you get to Arizona, you sort of get discovered.

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Speaker 3: It's such a weird concept.

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Speaker 2: Today because I know when I was growing up, all

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Speaker 2: of us thought like maybe we'd be discovered in a

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Speaker 2: mall or at a concert, and now there's no such discovery.

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Speaker 2: You just upload yourself to social media and like, wait,

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Speaker 2: you know, wait for the calls to come. What was

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Speaker 2: it like to really be like discovered?

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Speaker 1: Gosh, it was gary because I thought, is this guy

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Speaker 1: a creep?

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Speaker 4: Or what? Like?

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Speaker 1: Why is he talking to me? Why are my mom

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Speaker 1: and I taking a meeting with him and his wife?

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Speaker 1: And I had never ever ever thought of like being

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Speaker 1: an actress, moving a hall, I would being on TV. Never, No,

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Speaker 1: And so this was very out of left field for

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Speaker 1: me and kind of unbelievable. And it was like in

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Speaker 1: slow motion that the whole process started to happen. I

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Speaker 1: was discovered at a scholarship pageant. I thought I was

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Speaker 1: going to be this beautiful dancer. I was very bad

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Speaker 1: at it now looking back at the tapes. But he

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Speaker 1: saw something in me and he asked me, you know,

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Speaker 1: are you taking any acting lessons? And I said no,

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Speaker 1: I don't have never done that. So he got me

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Speaker 1: started taking acting lessons in Arizona and I would send

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Speaker 1: those VHS tapes to him, to him in California, and

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Speaker 1: he would give me notes and he would talk to

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Speaker 1: the acting teacher and tell me like what I needed

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Speaker 1: to work on, and we would do that. And then

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Speaker 1: eventually he was like, look, you're ready. If you ever

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Speaker 1: want to move out to LA, here's my card, come

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Speaker 1: out and we'll see what happens. And so we was like,

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Speaker 1: you know, a couple months later and we were like, knock, knock, knock. Hi,

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Speaker 1: it's me, It's Jenny and my mom. We just moved here,

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Speaker 1: So what do we do now?

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Speaker 2: But what was that like, leaving you know, the comfort

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Speaker 2: of Glendale and moving to Glendale, Arizona and moving moving

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Speaker 2: to LA you know, at the urging of someone in

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Speaker 2: the business, right, So it wasn't like you had no

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Speaker 2: business being there, but you move there and hoping for

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Speaker 2: the best.

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Speaker 3: What was that like?

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Speaker 1: It was exciting, it was scary. We didn't know anyone

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Speaker 1: except Randy James, and it was like an adventure for

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Speaker 1: my mom and I. So there was that kind of

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Speaker 1: like bonding thing and she, you know, we started going

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Speaker 1: to auditions and she would I was like fifteen sixteen,

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Speaker 1: and you know, I would hold the Thomas Guide map

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Speaker 1: and tell her where to go all over the city

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Speaker 1: of Los Angeles. And there were days where we were

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Speaker 1: just on every corner of the map and so I

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Speaker 1: learned so much about LA and I there's you know

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Speaker 1: that those times were so sort of innocent and yeah,

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Speaker 1: informative in a different way than happens now. So I can, yeah,

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Speaker 1: get anywhere I want to go in the city on

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Speaker 1: my own. I don't need the ways singing. But it

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Speaker 1: was just adventurous, you know, and I thought this is normal.

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Speaker 2: Were you were you like hyper ambitious, like I want

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Speaker 2: this and I'm gonna do anything it takes. Or were

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Speaker 2: you like, look, if this doesn't work out, that's okay,

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Speaker 2: and I'll figure something else out.

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Speaker 1: Yeah I was. I have always been a very day

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Speaker 1: by day person. I've never had like lofty goals of

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Speaker 1: oh I want to win an Oscar someday, and I

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Speaker 1: was born to be on stage, like no, I just

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Speaker 1: am me and if I you know, I somehow got

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Speaker 1: cast in a few things, just as like you know,

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Speaker 1: the girl next door or the girl that they could

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Speaker 1: get to say anything. And you know, I did an

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Speaker 1: episode of Growing Pains had one line so, oh, we're.

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Speaker 3: Just buying a little paste time.

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Speaker 1: Sticky, sticky, sticky, And I was already complaining about it

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Speaker 1: being a night shoot and that I was cold. So

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Speaker 1: my manner just like, oh jeez, here we go. But

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Speaker 1: then I got nine or two on Ozero and the

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Speaker 1: things just sort of took off on their own. But

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Speaker 1: I never thought like this is the life I want.

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Speaker 1: It just everything just happened in my life is all

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Speaker 1: just unfolded to primarily where I'm sitting here talking to

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Speaker 1: you right now. Like it's magical like that when you

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Speaker 1: just sort of let go and let life life, you know,

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Speaker 1: and and then you end up somewhere and you're like, hey,

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Speaker 1: I kind of like it here.

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Speaker 3: That's an amazing thing to hear.

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Speaker 2: And I can't tell you how different we are, I mean,

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Speaker 2: and I'm envious. I'm so envious of that perspective and

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Speaker 2: that ability really to just let life unfold. I don't

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Speaker 2: know why I felt so urgent and desperate to make

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Speaker 2: the life I wanted happen. But it's really tough because

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Speaker 2: when you can't, you know, inevitably around some corner is

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Speaker 2: a thing you can't make happen, or something that's out

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Speaker 2: of your control. It's really disorienting and deeply traumatizing. And

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Speaker 2: so it's really nice and refreshing to hear you talk

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Speaker 2: about intentionally navigating the world that way. And I you know,

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Speaker 2: when I talk to my son, these are the kinds

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Speaker 2: of things I tell him. You know, you don't have

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Speaker 2: to hyper focus on the things you think you want

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Speaker 2: now because you're not going to be able to control everything.

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Speaker 1: Right. It's so feutile. It's like, I'm just the kind

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Speaker 1: of person that's like, oh, there's baby birds, eggs, let

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Speaker 1: me look at those for a while. Oh, let me

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Speaker 1: go do an interview for a while, like, oh, let

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Speaker 1: me learn my lines for this thing. Like I just

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Speaker 1: go from thing to thing to thing the thing, and

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Speaker 1: I don't think about you know. I mean, I have

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Speaker 1: gotten more strategic as a businesswoman, but I haven't ever

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Speaker 1: spent a lot of time wasting seeing my energy or

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Speaker 1: spinning my wheels on things that I can control, because

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Speaker 1: as soon as I do that, I go into like

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Speaker 1: scarcity mode, you know, like I gotta have it. If

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Speaker 1: I don't have it, something's wrong. And I have gone

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Speaker 1: into those places throughout my many years here. But I

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Speaker 1: found when I go into those scarcity that scarcity mind,

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Speaker 1: nothing works out. Nothing. It seems like it's gonna happen

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Speaker 1: for me, and I get real negative and I can

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Speaker 1: get like, what am I doing? What's my purpose? All

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Speaker 1: that stuff. So I dappled in that thinking for a while,

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Speaker 1: and then I realized, you know what, No, I'm just

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Speaker 1: gonna go back to live in every moment as it

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Speaker 1: happens and see what happens because it feels better. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: And I don't have to stress as much. I'm not

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Speaker 1: gonna get as many wrinkles. Yeah, And I'm just gonna

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Speaker 1: be happy wherever I am.

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Speaker 2: Sometimes I can feel complicated. To change your perspective, it's

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Speaker 2: really not complicated. It's just like exactly what you said.

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Speaker 3: And when I've.

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Speaker 2: Exhaled and said, I can't control all the stuff going

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Speaker 2: on in my career, like my my business right now,

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Speaker 2: the business of news and politics is insane. It's on fire,

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Speaker 2: it's changing every minute, and you could not you could

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Speaker 2: not control your navigation through it if you if you

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Speaker 2: wanted to. And so when I've sort of just given

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Speaker 2: into it, You're right, like, that's oddly when the call comes,

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Speaker 2: like with a new opportunity that's going to solve all

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Speaker 2: the problems.

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Speaker 3: Oh, I didn't know, you know, something that was out

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Speaker 3: there I didn't even know about. You're so right.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, when you're open to things, they flow, and when

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Speaker 1: you're closed off to things, they strangle. And so for me,

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Speaker 1: that's been just the key to my life. And I

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Speaker 1: know it because I've tried it other ways, Yeah, intentionally think,

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Speaker 1: you know, like or because maybe money wasn't coming in,

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Speaker 1: and when I started to panic, how am I going to be,

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Speaker 1: you know, take care of these three girls and what's

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Speaker 1: going to happen? And I just stopped enjoying anything in

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Speaker 1: that kind of thinking. You know, I was always stressed, right,

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Speaker 1: And so I'm just and you said it's easy to do.

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Speaker 1: People don't know how easy it is. But for me,

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Speaker 1: it's as easy as just make a choice and go

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Speaker 1: with it.

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Speaker 3: I love that it's great advice. You know.

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Speaker 2: I had Brian Austin Green on too, and I said

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Speaker 2: the same thing to him that, like, he's already talked

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Speaker 2: a lot about nine o two one zero and some

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Speaker 2: of you on nine oh two one OMG, which people love,

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Speaker 2: and that's great, but we don't need to dwell on it.

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Speaker 2: There is one thing that I was really interested in, though,

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Speaker 2: and that was when you got to direct episodes. And

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Speaker 2: I'm wondering how that happened. Did you ask for those opportunities?

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Speaker 2: Did they come to you know, you know, did they

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Speaker 2: ask you to do that? What was what was that like?

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Speaker 2: And how was it received by other cast members?

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Speaker 1: That was Jason broke the seal on that one. They

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Speaker 1: were incentivizing him, I think, to stay on the show

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Speaker 1: at a certain point. I don't even know what year.

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Speaker 1: It was, maybe ninety four or five, sick something in

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Speaker 1: the middle. Anyways, he started directing and I watched him

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Speaker 1: and I thought, that looks really fun. That looks really

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Speaker 1: cool to be at the helm of this whole thing.

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Speaker 1: And No, they didn't come to me and say, oh please, Jenny,

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Speaker 1: would you direct an episode? No, that is something when

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Speaker 1: you want something if you see something as a challenge,

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Speaker 1: you have to go out and ask for it. And

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Speaker 1: there's never ever any harm in asking for things because

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Speaker 1: the worst that someone can say is no. And so

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Speaker 1: I just went to them and I said, I would

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Speaker 1: really like an opportunity to do that, and there was

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Speaker 1: I was the first of the females on the show

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Speaker 1: to embark on that journey. And also they knew me

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Speaker 1: as you know, just Jenny and like the girl that

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Speaker 1: plays Kelly, like fun and you know, no heavy, it's

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Speaker 1: all you know, easy. So I feel like at first

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Speaker 1: there probably wasn't as much confidence in me from around me,

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Speaker 1: but that quickly changed when I was very prepared and

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Speaker 1: knew exactly what I was doing and I wasn't afraid

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Speaker 1: to boss people around, you know. I was like, Okay,

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Speaker 1: it's my turn, and I just went for it.

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Speaker 2: What did that feel like, getting it, getting the opportunity,

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Speaker 2: killing it, and sort of, you know, proving to everyone

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Speaker 2: you could do that.

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Speaker 3: What does that feel like?

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Speaker 1: It felt natural? Honestly, I didn't feel like look at

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Speaker 1: me like, I didn't say like you. I didn't think

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Speaker 1: like I was proving it to anyone. I just felt

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Speaker 1: like it was a natural sort of cadence for myself,

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Speaker 1: and I'm so much more than what people probably think

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Speaker 1: and when they look at me, especially at that young

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Speaker 1: age and that position situation I was in. So for me,

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Speaker 1: it was like just I had no doubt in myself.

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Speaker 1: I had no doubt that I could do it. And

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Speaker 1: I think at that point then people just stopped having

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Speaker 1: any doubt in me or even thinking limiting thoughts about me,

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Speaker 1: because I clearly wasn't thinking them.

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Speaker 2: Is Hollywood better for women today than it was then?

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Speaker 2: You know, I talked to a lot of women in

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Speaker 2: the business and they'll say, in some ways yeah, but

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Speaker 2: in some ways no, what's your take on it?

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Speaker 1: You know what I've pivoted So I'm not as actress

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Speaker 1: for hire as I have given you know, the rest

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Speaker 1: of my life to being. But I think like it's

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Speaker 1: as it's limiting, it has been limiting it in the nineties,

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Speaker 1: it was very limiting. But I again don't pay attention

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Speaker 1: to limiting messages from other people around me. I just

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Speaker 1: cannot let myself dwell in that or think about that.

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Speaker 1: And I've also had to get really comfortable with rejection,

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Speaker 1: with not getting the thing or not having the opportunity,

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Speaker 1: so many times over the course of my career that

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Speaker 1: I've learned to just try and if I fail, okay, bye,

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Speaker 1: that's over behind me. What's next? And so I don't

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Speaker 1: look at it as this overall, like it's been so

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Speaker 1: bad for women. Yeah, in the nineties, people were smoking

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Speaker 1: off camera and the set and men were speaking to

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Speaker 1: women in very different ways than they do now, thank god.

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Speaker 1: But I rolled with it. I you know, I was like,

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Speaker 1: all right, I can handle this, like bring it. But

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Speaker 1: now just knowing that there are some systems in place,

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Speaker 1: that there is some yeah, some element of like decorum

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Speaker 1: or you know, sensibility on set, sensitivity perhaps, and just

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Speaker 1: knowing that things have changed so much, especially having three daughters,

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Speaker 1: knowing that when someone comments on your body, that's not okay,

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Speaker 1: that's not acceptable in this day and age. And it

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Speaker 1: still happens. Yeah, it does all the time, but we're

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Speaker 1: allowed to say, you know what, that's I'm not going

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Speaker 1: to allow that to happen right now because this is

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Speaker 1: the place for it. But so now just knowing that

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Speaker 1: my girls have that concept of being able to stand

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Speaker 1: up for themselves and things that I didn't have, but

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Speaker 1: I made work somehow, Like I didn't let it eat

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Speaker 1: away at me or bring me down or make me

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Speaker 1: feel like shit. Like I just rolled with it and

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Speaker 1: think what we're doings have changed. But as far as roles,

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Speaker 1: I mean roles are I think there's roles for everybody

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Speaker 1: out there. I mean, I haven't gotten hired for one lately,

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Speaker 1: but mostly by choice really, because I'm not really putting

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Speaker 1: myself out there in that land pool. I've decided that

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Speaker 1: I'm not going to sit around and wait for things

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Speaker 1: to happen for me. As far as business or industry,

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Speaker 1: I'm more in the place of like it's now or never,

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Speaker 1: I'm going to make it happen or it's not, and

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Speaker 1: I'm going to move away and have a goat and

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Speaker 1: maybe a little dog farm or something.

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Speaker 2: I don't know, you know, I'm I'm place in my

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Speaker 2: career as well where I'm not completely in control of

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Speaker 2: what opportunities I get, and so that's okay. But I

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Speaker 2: have found that this kind of stuff, which is different

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Speaker 2: from my job talking to people about mental health, has

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Speaker 2: actually become so much more fulfilling than the job that

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Speaker 2: I've been doing. And not that one's better than the other,

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Speaker 2: but I've just found a new life in this other

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Speaker 2: area that has nothing to do with the thing I've

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Speaker 2: done for twenty twenty five.

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Speaker 1: Years, right, and doesn't it feel great?

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Speaker 2: It feels amazing, But it also makes me, you know,

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Speaker 2: resent the fact that I still have to like make

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Speaker 2: money and do the other job, and you know, and

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Speaker 2: it's it's not just about the money. It's that people

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Speaker 2: expect me to talk about politics and I'm still you know,

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Speaker 2: in that loop of that cycle.

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Speaker 1: I mean, I don't know how you do what you do.

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Speaker 2: Well, it's it's it's awful now and it wasn't always awful,

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Speaker 2: and it's just become awful. But you also just don't

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Speaker 2: want to get off the hamster wheel because you know,

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Speaker 2: I know very well in my business, if you get

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Speaker 2: off the hamster wheel, you cannot get back on it.

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Speaker 3: And I'd like to reserve the right to get back

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Speaker 3: on at some point.

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Speaker 2: So it's, you know, it's this like balancing act of Okay,

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Speaker 2: this is the thing I'm loving doing right now. The

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Speaker 2: other thing is not very fulfilling, but it could become

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Speaker 2: fulfilling again if things change, and so I'm not willing

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Speaker 2: to completely leave it, and I also can't afford to.

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Speaker 2: It's complicated. It's complicated at this age and the stage

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Speaker 2: of our.

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Speaker 1: Careers absolutely because you can't, like you said, you cannot

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Speaker 1: control anything. Yeah, and even if you get off the

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Speaker 1: hamster wheel, you're gonna still you're going to probably think

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Speaker 1: why I should be back on a hamster wheel, I'm

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Speaker 1: missing out or I could have had this opportunity or

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Speaker 1: that opportunity. But I think, you know, you just reach

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Speaker 1: a place where you're like, wherever I am, I'm going

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Speaker 1: to find some opportunity to do something. And that's another

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Speaker 1: area like when you said you know you can't afford

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Speaker 1: to do it, I understand what you're saying. I have

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Speaker 1: been there, I am I can go there again any moment,

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Speaker 1: Like I understand that fear. But I also that was

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Speaker 1: one of the big areas for me where I had

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Speaker 1: to just reel back and say, you know what, money

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Speaker 1: is going to come to me, whatever I need is

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Speaker 1: going to come to me. And I had to just

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Speaker 1: really like, I've never been a faith oriented person. I've

397
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Speaker 1: never been a religious person. I've never I've always questioned, like,

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Speaker 1: why do people believe in the things they believe in,

399
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Speaker 1: like Reutigen and those kinds of things, and where do

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Speaker 1: they find that faith like, oh, like, pray to Jesus

401
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Speaker 1: and your dreams are going to come true. I'm like,

402
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Speaker 1: I don't. I'm not there and I don't know something

403
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Speaker 1: wrong with me that I don't see it that simplistic.

404
00:21:48,640 --> 00:21:51,240
Speaker 1: And then there came this point for me where I

405
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Speaker 1: got messaging in a different way about basically the same

406
00:21:54,840 --> 00:21:57,879
Speaker 1: things that everybody's always talking about, which is love is love,

407
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Speaker 1: and like how to you know, take care of your

408
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Speaker 1: family and all the things that really matter at the

409
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Speaker 1: end of the day. And it made sense to me

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Speaker 1: in a different way. And all of a sudden, it

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Speaker 1: was like a light that went off that I was like, oh,

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Speaker 1: I have faith, Like I honestly, this is what faith

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Speaker 1: feels like. And when I found that moment, and it

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Speaker 1: wasn't based on any religious teaching or anything. It came

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Speaker 1: from within me. I had faith in myself and I

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Speaker 1: had faith in the fact that everything is always going

417
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Speaker 1: to be okay no matter what ends up happening. There's

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Speaker 1: something about the situation that I will be able to

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Speaker 1: remind myself, I will be able to be grateful for

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Speaker 1: whatever it is, and I will remember that, Oh, I

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Speaker 1: have that faith to carry me forward, I'm not alone anymore.

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Speaker 3: That sounds awesome. I want some of that.

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Speaker 2: I'm similarly a skeptic and finding faith and things to

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Speaker 2: believe in has always been hard for me. And with

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Speaker 2: my anxiety, I'm the opposite, the verses around every corner.

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Speaker 2: And you know, I've never had that sense, well, it's

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Speaker 2: always going to be okay.

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Speaker 3: No, it's not for me.

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Speaker 2: It's it's not going to be okay unless I worry

430
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Speaker 2: about it, and the worrying about it is going to

431
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Speaker 2: prevent the bad thing from happening. It's it's terrible. And

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00:23:16,560 --> 00:23:20,879
Speaker 2: I'm in therapy and working on this. But how's that

433
00:23:20,920 --> 00:23:21,720
Speaker 2: working out for you?

434
00:23:21,840 --> 00:23:25,359
Speaker 3: Yeah? Not great? Not great. I mean, listen, my you know,

435
00:23:25,440 --> 00:23:26,360
Speaker 3: therapy and medication.

436
00:23:26,520 --> 00:23:28,840
Speaker 2: I'm so much better than I was at this time

437
00:23:28,920 --> 00:23:32,159
Speaker 2: when that was really taking over my thought process. But

438
00:23:32,800 --> 00:23:35,680
Speaker 2: the kind of faith you're talking about, the faith in yourself,

439
00:23:36,840 --> 00:23:38,960
Speaker 2: has the has been the thing I've had to find

440
00:23:39,040 --> 00:23:42,639
Speaker 2: and remind myself. You've always gotten yourself out of, you know,

441
00:23:42,760 --> 00:23:46,159
Speaker 2: tough situations, and you were you were always prepared just

442
00:23:46,200 --> 00:23:51,040
Speaker 2: by virtue of your experiences, your life experiences, your intelligence,

443
00:23:51,080 --> 00:23:55,159
Speaker 2: your ambition. You know, your intuition, you You've always figured

444
00:23:55,160 --> 00:23:56,960
Speaker 2: it out. And my my therapist said something to me

445
00:23:57,080 --> 00:24:01,800
Speaker 2: recently because I get very nervous for trying, whether I'm

446
00:24:01,840 --> 00:24:05,000
Speaker 2: traveling alone or with my family, and she said, you know,

447
00:24:05,040 --> 00:24:08,679
Speaker 2: you always get there, and I was like, wow, I

448
00:24:08,840 --> 00:24:09,920
Speaker 2: do always get there.

449
00:24:10,560 --> 00:24:13,919
Speaker 3: Historically, I have always arrived. I have always gotten to

450
00:24:14,000 --> 00:24:16,000
Speaker 3: the place I need to get to.

451
00:24:16,160 --> 00:24:19,439
Speaker 2: And that's the hard thing to remind myself that, like,

452
00:24:19,720 --> 00:24:21,200
Speaker 2: I always get there.

453
00:24:21,320 --> 00:24:22,640
Speaker 3: But it's really good advice.

454
00:24:23,240 --> 00:24:26,240
Speaker 1: I love that I had this therapist tell me once

455
00:24:26,840 --> 00:24:29,480
Speaker 1: that broke a lot open for me because I spent

456
00:24:29,560 --> 00:24:32,440
Speaker 1: a lot of my time as the baby of the family,

457
00:24:32,480 --> 00:24:36,800
Speaker 1: the only famous person in the entire area that I

458
00:24:36,840 --> 00:24:39,959
Speaker 1: lived in, Like, you know, things were always very different

459
00:24:39,960 --> 00:24:43,040
Speaker 1: from me, but I I had the therapist. So I

460
00:24:43,080 --> 00:24:46,639
Speaker 1: would always like belittle my everything, like try not to

461
00:24:46,920 --> 00:24:49,640
Speaker 1: let my light shine too big, because I didn't ever

462
00:24:49,680 --> 00:24:50,919
Speaker 1: want to overshine anymore.

463
00:24:51,000 --> 00:24:52,720
Speaker 3: Make yourself smaller exactly.

464
00:24:52,920 --> 00:24:56,520
Speaker 1: And so someone told me once it's okay to be amazing,

465
00:24:57,560 --> 00:25:02,359
Speaker 1: It's like what I can. It's okay to like be

466
00:25:02,720 --> 00:25:06,679
Speaker 1: my fullest and shine as much as I want to

467
00:25:06,760 --> 00:25:10,080
Speaker 1: or can, And that just really opened up something for

468
00:25:10,200 --> 00:25:11,960
Speaker 1: me where I was like you know what, We all

469
00:25:11,960 --> 00:25:15,480
Speaker 1: have that, right. It's not just me like I'm shining,

470
00:25:15,520 --> 00:25:18,600
Speaker 1: you shine, We all shine, and that's you know, why

471
00:25:18,640 --> 00:25:20,520
Speaker 1: would you want to live the rest of your life

472
00:25:20,560 --> 00:25:24,360
Speaker 1: diminishing yourself or hiding behind someone else or keeping your

473
00:25:24,359 --> 00:25:27,080
Speaker 1: eyes down. So that for me was like an aha moment,

474
00:25:27,760 --> 00:25:29,879
Speaker 1: It's okay to be amazing.

475
00:25:30,680 --> 00:25:33,800
Speaker 2: That's such a good one too, And you just reminded

476
00:25:33,840 --> 00:25:35,720
Speaker 2: me of another one. And this segues into the next

477
00:25:35,720 --> 00:25:38,240
Speaker 2: thing I want to ask you about. My therapist one said,

478
00:25:38,960 --> 00:25:41,880
Speaker 2: it's okay to be a good enough mom. You don't

479
00:25:41,920 --> 00:25:45,000
Speaker 2: have to be a perfect mom. Good Enough is actually

480
00:25:45,760 --> 00:25:50,000
Speaker 2: better because you're not modeling perfection and you're not trying

481
00:25:50,000 --> 00:25:54,199
Speaker 2: to raise a perfect child. You're trying to raise a

482
00:25:54,320 --> 00:25:58,000
Speaker 2: child who is comfortable being good enough himself. And if

483
00:25:58,040 --> 00:26:00,200
Speaker 2: you've set a standard for yourself where I've to be

484
00:26:00,240 --> 00:26:02,920
Speaker 2: a perfect mom, he's not going to feel like it's

485
00:26:02,920 --> 00:26:05,919
Speaker 2: okay to be a good enough kid.

486
00:26:06,040 --> 00:26:08,119
Speaker 3: And that opened so much up.

487
00:26:07,960 --> 00:26:11,040
Speaker 2: For me too, just taking like a weight off myself

488
00:26:11,080 --> 00:26:12,760
Speaker 2: and also like a weight off of him.

489
00:26:13,000 --> 00:26:16,679
Speaker 1: Right, Yeah, Oh my gosh, my girls have seen me fail,

490
00:26:17,720 --> 00:26:21,359
Speaker 1: They've seen me go low, they've seen me go high.

491
00:26:21,440 --> 00:26:24,200
Speaker 1: Like they know that it's all part of the game.

492
00:26:24,359 --> 00:26:26,960
Speaker 1: You know, it's all part of this wild ride. Yeah,

493
00:26:27,160 --> 00:26:27,679
Speaker 1: so good.

494
00:26:27,600 --> 00:26:31,000
Speaker 2: Though, Well, I want to talk about motherhood. What was

495
00:26:31,040 --> 00:26:34,199
Speaker 2: the biggest challenge when you were working and you had

496
00:26:34,359 --> 00:26:38,520
Speaker 2: your your oldest and what's the biggest challenge now.

497
00:26:38,440 --> 00:26:40,640
Speaker 3: As your kids are grown grownish.

498
00:26:41,720 --> 00:26:46,639
Speaker 1: The biggest challenge for me was, I'm just like I'm eternal,

499
00:26:46,920 --> 00:26:49,960
Speaker 1: like I when I had that baby, nothing was going

500
00:26:50,040 --> 00:26:51,840
Speaker 1: to take it away from me. So I would have

501
00:26:51,920 --> 00:26:54,560
Speaker 1: her up at five in the morning going to set

502
00:26:54,880 --> 00:26:58,000
Speaker 1: you know, I had to work really hard to get

503
00:26:58,040 --> 00:27:00,760
Speaker 1: an environment for her set up where I could be

504
00:27:00,840 --> 00:27:03,240
Speaker 1: with her whenever. In between all the takes of me

505
00:27:03,359 --> 00:27:06,080
Speaker 1: acting like a little teenage girl, a little young adult

506
00:27:06,119 --> 00:27:09,480
Speaker 1: girl sassy on camera, yea, I would like, hi tail

507
00:27:09,520 --> 00:27:12,040
Speaker 1: it back to my baby trailer, That's what I called it,

508
00:27:12,520 --> 00:27:15,120
Speaker 1: and just spend the time on the floor with her

509
00:27:15,240 --> 00:27:18,160
Speaker 1: and you know, feeding her, changing her. So the hard

510
00:27:18,160 --> 00:27:21,560
Speaker 1: part for me was allowing myself to go out and

511
00:27:21,600 --> 00:27:24,760
Speaker 1: work and not feel guilty about it or not feel

512
00:27:24,800 --> 00:27:29,240
Speaker 1: like so pulled in polar opposite directions, and I sort

513
00:27:29,240 --> 00:27:31,560
Speaker 1: of settled into that with her, and we got into

514
00:27:31,560 --> 00:27:35,080
Speaker 1: a great groove and then I had another one, another daughter,

515
00:27:35,760 --> 00:27:38,399
Speaker 1: and I felt the same way automatically again, but she

516
00:27:38,520 --> 00:27:41,000
Speaker 1: had her older sister, so it kind of like I

517
00:27:41,000 --> 00:27:45,280
Speaker 1: felt like, okay's she's in a great situation and you know,

518
00:27:45,320 --> 00:27:47,400
Speaker 1: and she's filling her days with love. So I can

519
00:27:47,480 --> 00:27:49,400
Speaker 1: step out for a while and work and come back.

520
00:27:49,880 --> 00:27:53,240
Speaker 1: And now with my third daughter, who just graduated from

521
00:27:53,280 --> 00:27:56,320
Speaker 1: high school and is about to go to college, which

522
00:27:56,359 --> 00:28:00,520
Speaker 1: is so crazy because I've spent the better part of

523
00:28:00,520 --> 00:28:04,639
Speaker 1: my life, yeah, either making babies or keeping babies alive

524
00:28:05,520 --> 00:28:09,040
Speaker 1: and then and raising them. So now I'm just sort

525
00:28:09,080 --> 00:28:13,160
Speaker 1: of like, Okay, there's a lot quiet around me right now,

526
00:28:13,359 --> 00:28:15,359
Speaker 1: what do I want to do? And that I think

527
00:28:15,440 --> 00:28:17,679
Speaker 1: that's one of the cool things about like this whole

528
00:28:18,320 --> 00:28:20,639
Speaker 1: You can call it reinvention, you can call it pivot,

529
00:28:20,680 --> 00:28:22,600
Speaker 1: you can call it whatever you want. I don't care.

530
00:28:23,000 --> 00:28:25,399
Speaker 1: But at a certain age in a woman's life, we

531
00:28:25,440 --> 00:28:29,720
Speaker 1: get to refocus our energy on what we want and

532
00:28:30,040 --> 00:28:32,439
Speaker 1: what matters to us. If what does what matter to

533
00:28:32,520 --> 00:28:35,199
Speaker 1: us long ago still matter to us, or do we

534
00:28:35,240 --> 00:28:37,280
Speaker 1: have a whole new set of things that we're interested

535
00:28:37,320 --> 00:28:39,960
Speaker 1: and intrigued by and want to learn from. And so

536
00:28:40,160 --> 00:28:42,959
Speaker 1: I'm just really embracing this period of my life, and

537
00:28:43,000 --> 00:28:45,480
Speaker 1: it kind of feels like I'm young all over again

538
00:28:45,520 --> 00:28:50,480
Speaker 1: in a weird way, without immense responsibilities all day every day,

539
00:28:50,920 --> 00:28:53,040
Speaker 1: you know, I have to kind of figure out what's

540
00:28:53,040 --> 00:28:55,400
Speaker 1: for dinner and who's going to be here to eat

541
00:28:55,400 --> 00:28:59,040
Speaker 1: if that's about it now, you know, And usually I'm like, hey, babe,

542
00:28:59,160 --> 00:29:01,800
Speaker 1: what's for dinner. I just put it on him. Yeah,

543
00:29:01,840 --> 00:29:03,120
Speaker 1: so it's a good time.

544
00:29:03,600 --> 00:29:17,920
Speaker 4: Yeah, let's talk about reinvention.

545
00:29:19,200 --> 00:29:21,160
Speaker 1: Why you say, okay, here's my issue with really, why

546
00:29:21,160 --> 00:29:22,120
Speaker 1: I don't like it? Okay.

547
00:29:22,560 --> 00:29:25,560
Speaker 2: It's such an important thing to talk about because when

548
00:29:25,600 --> 00:29:29,360
Speaker 2: you reach a place in your career, maybe when you

549
00:29:29,400 --> 00:29:36,040
Speaker 2: feel like stalled or plateaued, or undervalued or underused, and

550
00:29:36,120 --> 00:29:39,760
Speaker 2: I have been there, it's of course important to reinvent.

551
00:29:39,840 --> 00:29:41,720
Speaker 3: It's necessary to reinvent.

552
00:29:41,800 --> 00:29:43,440
Speaker 2: You've got to just move through it, and you've got

553
00:29:43,440 --> 00:29:47,000
Speaker 2: to pivot all the words. But it can be really

554
00:29:47,000 --> 00:29:50,240
Speaker 2: hard because sometimes it feels like it's happening to you

555
00:29:50,320 --> 00:29:53,440
Speaker 2: like I didn't choose. If it were up to me,

556
00:29:53,640 --> 00:29:56,000
Speaker 2: I wouldn't have to do this reinvention or this pivot

557
00:29:56,400 --> 00:29:59,320
Speaker 2: right now in my career. I'd still be doing it.

558
00:29:59,360 --> 00:30:01,000
Speaker 2: The way I wanted to do it, in the way

559
00:30:01,000 --> 00:30:03,360
Speaker 2: you've always wanted me to do it. But now you

560
00:30:03,400 --> 00:30:06,880
Speaker 2: know we can cling to our past lives and past

561
00:30:07,120 --> 00:30:13,120
Speaker 2: selves because reinvention is disruptive, it's disorienting, it's scary, and

562
00:30:13,160 --> 00:30:15,640
Speaker 2: there's no one roadmap to do it.

563
00:30:15,720 --> 00:30:18,400
Speaker 3: So my association, I have an.

564
00:30:18,280 --> 00:30:21,600
Speaker 2: Ambivalence toward reinvention because I feel like sometimes it's not

565
00:30:21,680 --> 00:30:25,400
Speaker 2: my choice, but I also know how necessary it is

566
00:30:25,480 --> 00:30:29,720
Speaker 2: and actually how productive it is to reinvent. But talk

567
00:30:29,760 --> 00:30:32,680
Speaker 2: about your your version of reinvention and what that looks like.

568
00:30:33,240 --> 00:30:37,880
Speaker 1: Well, first of all, I just would encourage a person

569
00:30:38,000 --> 00:30:42,280
Speaker 1: to reframe it's not my choice because guess what, it's

570
00:30:42,280 --> 00:30:44,960
Speaker 1: always your choice. Yes, tell me, it's always your choice.

571
00:30:45,000 --> 00:30:47,840
Speaker 1: You don't have to do anything that you don't want

572
00:30:47,880 --> 00:30:51,360
Speaker 1: to do. You can make anything something you want to

573
00:30:51,400 --> 00:30:54,760
Speaker 1: do if you reframe it, you know what I mean,

574
00:30:54,800 --> 00:30:58,360
Speaker 1: If you speak about it to yourself differently, if you

575
00:30:58,360 --> 00:31:01,000
Speaker 1: speak about it to the world differently, it takes on

576
00:31:01,080 --> 00:31:04,560
Speaker 1: a new energy, It takes on a it grounds it

577
00:31:04,640 --> 00:31:07,200
Speaker 1: and makes it more authentic for you. So it's not

578
00:31:07,280 --> 00:31:09,400
Speaker 1: this like, oh I have to reinvent or I'm not

579
00:31:09,400 --> 00:31:11,720
Speaker 1: going to continue to be able to do the things

580
00:31:11,720 --> 00:31:16,520
Speaker 1: that I need to do. It's I'm choosing to pivot

581
00:31:16,520 --> 00:31:19,000
Speaker 1: a little bit. I'm choosing to look over here instead

582
00:31:19,000 --> 00:31:22,040
Speaker 1: of focusing only on this. And so for me, it's

583
00:31:22,080 --> 00:31:24,920
Speaker 1: an exciting thing. Like I don't feel it as like

584
00:31:25,040 --> 00:31:27,480
Speaker 1: I have to do it, But I understand where you're

585
00:31:27,520 --> 00:31:31,480
Speaker 1: coming from, because there are times when we feel like

586
00:31:31,600 --> 00:31:34,200
Speaker 1: we have to make a change or we because if

587
00:31:34,200 --> 00:31:36,240
Speaker 1: we don't, we're going to get left behind, or we're

588
00:31:36,240 --> 00:31:39,280
Speaker 1: going to be become irrelevant or whatever it is to

589
00:31:39,320 --> 00:31:43,240
Speaker 1: our families, to our workforce, whatever it is. But it

590
00:31:43,360 --> 00:31:46,920
Speaker 1: for me, its just became about reframing things because there's

591
00:31:46,920 --> 00:31:48,560
Speaker 1: things I don't want to do and if I keep

592
00:31:48,600 --> 00:31:51,400
Speaker 1: talking about them, then it just makes it worse, you

593
00:31:51,480 --> 00:31:51,960
Speaker 1: know what I mean?

594
00:31:52,360 --> 00:31:52,640
Speaker 3: Yep.

595
00:31:52,800 --> 00:31:55,800
Speaker 1: But for me, like I I grew up like watching

596
00:31:57,440 --> 00:31:59,480
Speaker 1: this might not even be a good example. But Madonna,

597
00:31:59,480 --> 00:32:04,560
Speaker 1: for example, and how her music, her looks changed from

598
00:32:04,560 --> 00:32:09,680
Speaker 1: every record, her music seemed to evolve, her makeup would evolve,

599
00:32:09,720 --> 00:32:12,000
Speaker 1: Like I was just always watching, like what's the new

600
00:32:12,040 --> 00:32:14,040
Speaker 1: look going to be? And how's she going to carry herself?

601
00:32:14,440 --> 00:32:17,080
Speaker 1: How she has a British accent. That's cool, Wait, there's

602
00:32:17,080 --> 00:32:19,680
Speaker 1: a Gagner teeth. I never knew that, Like, you know,

603
00:32:20,240 --> 00:32:22,560
Speaker 1: all these things, and I'm just constantly there was more

604
00:32:22,640 --> 00:32:25,720
Speaker 1: unfolding of Madonna, and so I thought, you know what,

605
00:32:25,800 --> 00:32:29,960
Speaker 1: that's okay, that's cool. I aspire to just continue unfolding

606
00:32:30,680 --> 00:32:33,760
Speaker 1: the way I want and let the world come along

607
00:32:33,800 --> 00:32:35,920
Speaker 1: with it, let my family and my friends come along

608
00:32:35,960 --> 00:32:38,440
Speaker 1: with that role or not. Like, but I'm here to

609
00:32:38,480 --> 00:32:42,160
Speaker 1: live my life, you know, And I feel like I

610
00:32:42,280 --> 00:32:45,560
Speaker 1: encourage women to embrace whatever you want to call it

611
00:32:45,600 --> 00:32:51,080
Speaker 1: and reinvention the big pivot, you know, I think it

612
00:32:51,840 --> 00:32:55,040
Speaker 1: look at as as something exciting and then design it

613
00:32:55,400 --> 00:32:58,920
Speaker 1: however you want, because maybe you didn't design how you

614
00:32:58,960 --> 00:33:02,040
Speaker 1: got here. Maybe if you're like me, you just ended

615
00:33:02,120 --> 00:33:04,280
Speaker 1: up where you are. You ended up with three daughters,

616
00:33:04,320 --> 00:33:07,760
Speaker 1: you ended up divorced after seventeen years, You ended up

617
00:33:08,200 --> 00:33:10,080
Speaker 1: you know where you are right now.

618
00:33:11,080 --> 00:33:12,120
Speaker 3: But if you.

619
00:33:13,680 --> 00:33:16,040
Speaker 1: Look at it a different way and let it just

620
00:33:16,120 --> 00:33:18,440
Speaker 1: motivate you to know what you don't want in your

621
00:33:18,480 --> 00:33:20,560
Speaker 1: life and then create what you do want in your life.

622
00:33:21,440 --> 00:33:23,760
Speaker 1: You know, at this age you can get real clear

623
00:33:23,880 --> 00:33:25,600
Speaker 1: about what you don't want in your life and what

624
00:33:25,640 --> 00:33:28,200
Speaker 1: you do want in your life, which is the beauty

625
00:33:28,280 --> 00:33:34,400
Speaker 1: of aging, and really, I think learning about yourself on

626
00:33:34,440 --> 00:33:36,280
Speaker 1: another level.

627
00:33:37,240 --> 00:33:39,560
Speaker 2: Of course, it's good advice, Jenny. Of course it's good

628
00:33:39,600 --> 00:33:44,400
Speaker 2: advice to reframe the way, of course, of course. And

629
00:33:44,520 --> 00:33:49,520
Speaker 2: you're right when I forced myself to reframe maybe a

630
00:33:49,560 --> 00:33:54,920
Speaker 2: pivot I didn't want to make and ask myself, was

631
00:33:54,960 --> 00:33:57,960
Speaker 2: I even happy fight, you know, with the thing that

632
00:33:58,000 --> 00:34:02,400
Speaker 2: I was fighting desperately to keep staying in. No, I wasn't, actually,

633
00:34:02,480 --> 00:34:05,840
Speaker 2: And you get to a place sometimes.

634
00:34:05,360 --> 00:34:08,880
Speaker 3: In your career or your life where you're.

635
00:34:08,719 --> 00:34:10,839
Speaker 2: Going through the motions it's the only thing you've known,

636
00:34:11,040 --> 00:34:14,120
Speaker 2: and you're not asking yourself, am I actually happy here?

637
00:34:14,520 --> 00:34:17,439
Speaker 2: Or am I just fighting to remain here because it's

638
00:34:17,640 --> 00:34:18,600
Speaker 2: where I'm supposed to be?

639
00:34:18,719 --> 00:34:19,080
Speaker 3: I think?

640
00:34:19,960 --> 00:34:22,120
Speaker 2: And so yeah, letting go of some of the things

641
00:34:23,160 --> 00:34:26,920
Speaker 2: I thought I wanted and reframing it is I actually

642
00:34:26,960 --> 00:34:31,440
Speaker 2: don't want that thing anymore was super, super helpful. But

643
00:34:31,480 --> 00:34:33,279
Speaker 2: it was just hard to get to that point. It

644
00:34:33,320 --> 00:34:35,000
Speaker 2: took a lot of work to get to a point

645
00:34:35,040 --> 00:34:38,720
Speaker 2: where I could say, like a couple of years to say, Okay,

646
00:34:38,760 --> 00:34:42,560
Speaker 2: I actually this is a good shift and it's actually

647
00:34:42,600 --> 00:34:44,920
Speaker 2: paying off in ways I couldn't have imagined.

648
00:34:45,040 --> 00:34:47,800
Speaker 3: And but it's hard. It's really hard.

649
00:34:48,200 --> 00:34:50,759
Speaker 1: It's hard. That's why they call it the work. You know,

650
00:34:50,920 --> 00:34:53,800
Speaker 1: it's not you know, it's not like going out to lunch.

651
00:34:53,920 --> 00:34:58,440
Speaker 1: It's work, and evolving is hard, like a hard times.

652
00:34:58,480 --> 00:35:01,880
Speaker 1: My husband and I thank god I've married somebody who

653
00:35:02,000 --> 00:35:05,920
Speaker 1: is interested in growing and you know, letting life unfold

654
00:35:06,239 --> 00:35:08,560
Speaker 1: as it happens. So we're really kind of on the

655
00:35:08,600 --> 00:35:13,239
Speaker 1: journey together. But it's really sometimes we'll be in a

656
00:35:13,360 --> 00:35:15,960
Speaker 1: thing and or like, you know, having that moment where

657
00:35:15,960 --> 00:35:17,439
Speaker 1: we're like, wait, I need to kind of like check

658
00:35:17,440 --> 00:35:20,560
Speaker 1: in and how am I handling the situation? Am I

659
00:35:20,640 --> 00:35:22,279
Speaker 1: being the person I want to be right now?

660
00:35:22,400 --> 00:35:22,600
Speaker 3: Yeah?

661
00:35:22,960 --> 00:35:26,640
Speaker 1: And we'll be like, oh, I'm so tired of evolving.

662
00:35:26,680 --> 00:35:27,160
Speaker 1: It's so good.

663
00:35:27,200 --> 00:35:27,800
Speaker 3: It's exhausting.

664
00:35:28,800 --> 00:35:32,320
Speaker 1: But guess what, take a break, Go take a break

665
00:35:32,360 --> 00:35:34,799
Speaker 1: and then come back to it because it'll be there

666
00:35:34,840 --> 00:35:36,279
Speaker 1: waiting for you as well.

667
00:35:36,800 --> 00:35:41,000
Speaker 3: That's so true. Okay, before we get to.

668
00:35:42,480 --> 00:35:44,279
Speaker 2: A lighting round, I want to ask you what it

669
00:35:44,360 --> 00:35:49,160
Speaker 2: was like to start on a reality show after having

670
00:35:49,200 --> 00:35:49,759
Speaker 2: not done that.

671
00:35:49,840 --> 00:35:51,400
Speaker 3: What was what was that like?

672
00:35:51,440 --> 00:35:54,279
Speaker 2: And I adore reality television, I'm a huge Bravo fan,

673
00:35:54,800 --> 00:35:56,879
Speaker 2: but what was it like to have your own reality show.

674
00:35:57,680 --> 00:36:00,239
Speaker 1: I don't even like reality TV. I don't even like

675
00:36:00,280 --> 00:36:04,960
Speaker 1: reality shows, So that was a weird thing where the

676
00:36:05,200 --> 00:36:07,920
Speaker 1: you know, the everything's rolling and it's rolling in that direction.

677
00:36:08,480 --> 00:36:12,040
Speaker 1: And that was like right at the end of my marriage. Honestly,

678
00:36:12,640 --> 00:36:15,359
Speaker 1: I was in that really confused and shut down and

679
00:36:15,520 --> 00:36:18,440
Speaker 1: hurt and just angry and bitter, all the things you

680
00:36:18,480 --> 00:36:21,520
Speaker 1: can be after a divorce like that, or amidst a

681
00:36:21,560 --> 00:36:24,319
Speaker 1: divorce like that. And I did not want to do

682
00:36:24,400 --> 00:36:26,120
Speaker 1: the show. We had signed on to do it as

683
00:36:26,160 --> 00:36:29,239
Speaker 1: a family as my husband and wife move the kids

684
00:36:29,280 --> 00:36:31,640
Speaker 1: out of town and they go a little bit country, like,

685
00:36:31,760 --> 00:36:33,839
Speaker 1: because it's in my bones to live. Are you talking

686
00:36:33,840 --> 00:36:35,160
Speaker 1: about a little bit country right, yes?

687
00:36:35,239 --> 00:36:36,200
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, yeah.

688
00:36:36,280 --> 00:36:38,879
Speaker 1: So for me it was just like about having fun

689
00:36:38,920 --> 00:36:40,360
Speaker 1: with the family and then all of a sudden, this

690
00:36:40,400 --> 00:36:42,480
Speaker 1: wrench was sort of thrown into it, and I had

691
00:36:42,480 --> 00:36:45,919
Speaker 1: to really work hard to even show up at work

692
00:36:45,920 --> 00:36:50,320
Speaker 1: for that job. Honestly, Luckily it was shot in my house,

693
00:36:50,360 --> 00:36:53,200
Speaker 1: so I didn't have to go far, but it was

694
00:36:53,719 --> 00:36:56,080
Speaker 1: it was hard to be in that place of happy

695
00:36:56,239 --> 00:37:00,799
Speaker 1: and easy, you know, go with the flow, Jenny. It

696
00:37:00,840 --> 00:37:03,799
Speaker 1: was really difficult during that time, but I loved it

697
00:37:03,840 --> 00:37:05,719
Speaker 1: and we had a really good time doing it. So

698
00:37:05,920 --> 00:37:08,319
Speaker 1: in retrospect, even though it was something I wasn't into

699
00:37:08,360 --> 00:37:09,960
Speaker 1: and I didn't want to be doing, I can look

700
00:37:10,000 --> 00:37:12,360
Speaker 1: back on it and I can see the fun that

701
00:37:12,440 --> 00:37:15,600
Speaker 1: we had and the fun that it gave other people

702
00:37:15,680 --> 00:37:18,640
Speaker 1: to watch. Yeah, but for me, it wasn't the best

703
00:37:18,680 --> 00:37:20,640
Speaker 1: time to remember.

704
00:37:21,440 --> 00:37:25,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, and I can't imagine that.

705
00:37:25,080 --> 00:37:29,200
Speaker 2: But did you go on thinking and you don't have

706
00:37:29,239 --> 00:37:31,640
Speaker 2: to answer this if it's too personal, but you know,

707
00:37:32,200 --> 00:37:34,560
Speaker 2: did you go on thinking this reality show will be

708
00:37:34,640 --> 00:37:38,200
Speaker 2: good for our marriage or did you go on thinking

709
00:37:38,880 --> 00:37:40,920
Speaker 2: we're not in such a great place and maybe this

710
00:37:40,960 --> 00:37:43,760
Speaker 2: will open up some decisions.

711
00:37:44,360 --> 00:37:44,560
Speaker 4: Yeah.

712
00:37:44,680 --> 00:37:47,480
Speaker 1: No, there was no thinking around that. That's something that

713
00:37:47,520 --> 00:37:49,520
Speaker 1: we had agreed to do before I even knew that

714
00:37:49,520 --> 00:37:51,279
Speaker 1: there was a problem in our marriage. And then all

715
00:37:51,280 --> 00:37:55,440
Speaker 1: of a sudden there was a much bigger problem than

716
00:37:55,480 --> 00:38:01,000
Speaker 1: I realized, and I was being left. Basically, I was

717
00:38:01,040 --> 00:38:04,960
Speaker 1: already in this contract. It was already happening, and it

718
00:38:05,120 --> 00:38:08,279
Speaker 1: wasn't something that I could get out of, honestly, And

719
00:38:08,360 --> 00:38:15,080
Speaker 1: my ex at the time was also producing it with me,

720
00:38:16,160 --> 00:38:18,680
Speaker 1: and that was weird because it wasn't even in it anymore,

721
00:38:18,800 --> 00:38:22,040
Speaker 1: and it just was like Okay, let me get through

722
00:38:22,080 --> 00:38:24,000
Speaker 1: this moment. I was like, look, I just need to

723
00:38:24,040 --> 00:38:27,040
Speaker 1: survive this. And at the same time I'm surviving and

724
00:38:27,120 --> 00:38:28,680
Speaker 1: I need to make it look fun for my kids.

725
00:38:28,719 --> 00:38:30,760
Speaker 1: I need to look, I need to have some laughter

726
00:38:30,840 --> 00:38:32,640
Speaker 1: in their lives. I need them to have some levity.

727
00:38:32,719 --> 00:38:36,160
Speaker 1: So we used I used that opportunity the best I

728
00:38:36,200 --> 00:38:40,120
Speaker 1: could to keep up appearances for the girls that everything's

729
00:38:40,120 --> 00:38:42,560
Speaker 1: fun and it's going to be just continue to be

730
00:38:42,560 --> 00:38:44,640
Speaker 1: a fun adventure this life, you know. And I was

731
00:38:44,719 --> 00:38:49,799
Speaker 1: really just sort of holding my true emotions and feelings

732
00:38:49,840 --> 00:38:54,960
Speaker 1: inside while trying to deliver and also you know, be

733
00:38:55,080 --> 00:39:01,239
Speaker 1: a good mom during that very confusing time, cruciating. It

734
00:39:01,280 --> 00:39:04,520
Speaker 1: was not the greatest, not the greatest.

735
00:39:05,040 --> 00:39:09,160
Speaker 2: God, Yeah, that's a lot of things happening at once.

736
00:39:09,280 --> 00:39:11,120
Speaker 3: But you got to roll with it, right, But you

737
00:39:11,160 --> 00:39:12,359
Speaker 3: got to roll with it. Yeah.

738
00:39:13,440 --> 00:39:17,040
Speaker 2: Wof what advice you would give to a young actress,

739
00:39:17,560 --> 00:39:18,799
Speaker 2: you know, working today.

740
00:39:19,880 --> 00:39:22,440
Speaker 1: Gosh, I would say study first of all. You know,

741
00:39:23,040 --> 00:39:26,080
Speaker 1: if I'm of the thinking that if you're going to

742
00:39:26,239 --> 00:39:28,759
Speaker 1: be paid to do something, you probably need to know

743
00:39:28,800 --> 00:39:32,120
Speaker 1: how to do it, that you need to actually gather

744
00:39:32,239 --> 00:39:34,239
Speaker 1: the tools so that you can do your job well.

745
00:39:35,120 --> 00:39:37,960
Speaker 1: Whether that's you know, just learning how to be on

746
00:39:38,000 --> 00:39:41,680
Speaker 1: a set or have set etiquette, how to memorize your lines,

747
00:39:41,719 --> 00:39:44,680
Speaker 1: how to put yourself in that moment as an actress

748
00:39:44,719 --> 00:39:47,239
Speaker 1: that you need to be in. But more than that,

749
00:39:47,320 --> 00:39:50,600
Speaker 1: as I would appeal to probably the person behind the

750
00:39:50,640 --> 00:39:55,480
Speaker 1: desire to become an actress and really let them know

751
00:39:55,560 --> 00:39:57,160
Speaker 1: that it's not It doesn't have anything to do with

752
00:39:57,200 --> 00:39:59,480
Speaker 1: all of that has everything to do with what's inside

753
00:39:59,480 --> 00:40:03,440
Speaker 1: of you and to my you know, just stay authentic

754
00:40:03,520 --> 00:40:06,920
Speaker 1: to who you are and don't try to be anything

755
00:40:06,960 --> 00:40:10,520
Speaker 1: that you're not because that will never work. Yeah, you

756
00:40:10,560 --> 00:40:14,120
Speaker 1: can play different characters, but there's got to be part

757
00:40:14,160 --> 00:40:16,160
Speaker 1: of you in each of them. There's got to be

758
00:40:16,280 --> 00:40:19,440
Speaker 1: some element of grounding and authenticity for you to be

759
00:40:19,480 --> 00:40:22,919
Speaker 1: able to do your job well. And so that would

760
00:40:22,960 --> 00:40:25,359
Speaker 1: be what I would tell them. Great, and don't get

761
00:40:25,400 --> 00:40:28,680
Speaker 1: caught up in any of the bullshit because it's all bullshit.

762
00:40:28,960 --> 00:40:33,680
Speaker 1: It's all approval for nothing. There's people can tell you

763
00:40:34,719 --> 00:40:37,040
Speaker 1: all day long how beautiful you are and how wonderful

764
00:40:37,080 --> 00:40:39,560
Speaker 1: you were in that scene and how you're perfect and

765
00:40:40,080 --> 00:40:43,480
Speaker 1: oh my gosh, and then none of that matters nothing.

766
00:40:43,800 --> 00:40:46,440
Speaker 1: You go home, you take your pants off the way

767
00:40:46,440 --> 00:40:49,600
Speaker 1: everybody else does you. It's we're all the same, and

768
00:40:49,640 --> 00:40:52,920
Speaker 1: so don't allow yourself to ever fall into that thinking

769
00:40:53,000 --> 00:40:55,319
Speaker 1: that you're any more special than anybody else.

770
00:40:56,120 --> 00:40:59,680
Speaker 2: That's great advice, And I lied, I have one more

771
00:40:59,719 --> 00:41:03,000
Speaker 2: question before a lightning round the mid life because this

772
00:41:03,120 --> 00:41:07,000
Speaker 2: just occurred to me. Midlife crisis or whatever you want

773
00:41:07,000 --> 00:41:09,960
Speaker 2: to call it, you know, the mid life anxiety, the

774
00:41:09,960 --> 00:41:14,440
Speaker 2: mid life angst, to me looks very different for men

775
00:41:14,480 --> 00:41:18,000
Speaker 2: than it does for women. And I'm generalizing. You know,

776
00:41:18,080 --> 00:41:20,920
Speaker 2: we all know what a male midlife crisis looks like,

777
00:41:21,040 --> 00:41:27,759
Speaker 2: and for women it feels much more emotional and inside

778
00:41:27,760 --> 00:41:30,719
Speaker 2: of ourselves, you know, and not something we can fix

779
00:41:30,800 --> 00:41:33,239
Speaker 2: with a sports car or a younger wife or you know,

780
00:41:34,000 --> 00:41:38,120
Speaker 2: something much more deep seated and tricky. And you know,

781
00:41:38,200 --> 00:41:41,000
Speaker 2: I have some friends and some people who are in

782
00:41:41,040 --> 00:41:43,359
Speaker 2: the public eye in fact, that are women in their

783
00:41:43,400 --> 00:41:46,080
Speaker 2: forties or fifties, and they're really like unraveling, like having

784
00:41:46,080 --> 00:41:47,160
Speaker 2: a break with reality.

785
00:41:47,239 --> 00:41:48,680
Speaker 3: I'm sure you know some of those two.

786
00:41:48,680 --> 00:41:52,080
Speaker 2: And it's really hard to watch because you know, like

787
00:41:53,239 --> 00:41:55,400
Speaker 2: she really needs some help and she's not getting it.

788
00:41:55,440 --> 00:42:00,920
Speaker 2: You know, what's your take on what happens to some women?

789
00:42:01,200 --> 00:42:06,920
Speaker 2: At this age of life and how we're all trying

790
00:42:06,960 --> 00:42:07,879
Speaker 2: to approach it.

791
00:42:10,040 --> 00:42:13,919
Speaker 1: I cannot speak to how men handle it. I can,

792
00:42:14,400 --> 00:42:16,319
Speaker 1: you know, speak to how I've seen men handle it,

793
00:42:16,320 --> 00:42:20,680
Speaker 1: which is similar to what you're describing. But for me,

794
00:42:21,600 --> 00:42:25,480
Speaker 1: and I think I'm a pretty like average woman, normal

795
00:42:25,760 --> 00:42:28,840
Speaker 1: going through all the things that every other woman goes through.

796
00:42:29,200 --> 00:42:34,640
Speaker 1: I feel like for me, I was very stunted in

797
00:42:34,680 --> 00:42:38,640
Speaker 1: my personal development, probably because of being an actress and

798
00:42:38,680 --> 00:42:42,799
Speaker 1: being so sheltered in the industry that I was in,

799
00:42:42,880 --> 00:42:45,600
Speaker 1: and then also going and creating a bubble of a

800
00:42:45,640 --> 00:42:48,080
Speaker 1: life that I lived in this like happy marriage with

801
00:42:48,120 --> 00:42:50,520
Speaker 1: the picket fence and all the things, and you know

802
00:42:50,560 --> 00:42:53,880
Speaker 1: that identity that started to form itself as the mom,

803
00:42:53,920 --> 00:42:57,520
Speaker 1: as the wife, as the whatever. And I think at

804
00:42:57,560 --> 00:43:01,920
Speaker 1: a certain point, you know, we things break down, things

805
00:43:02,000 --> 00:43:06,360
Speaker 1: like shock us, surprise us, disappoint us, break our hearts,

806
00:43:07,160 --> 00:43:10,680
Speaker 1: and that's the moment you have to seize that opportunity

807
00:43:11,600 --> 00:43:14,600
Speaker 1: as and I fought it. Let me tell you, for years,

808
00:43:14,680 --> 00:43:17,880
Speaker 1: I was in what you're talking about. I was in trouble.

809
00:43:17,960 --> 00:43:22,439
Speaker 1: I was spiraling, I was drowning. But once I came

810
00:43:22,560 --> 00:43:27,840
Speaker 1: up and stopped being so self indulgent, quite honestly, stopped

811
00:43:29,440 --> 00:43:32,480
Speaker 1: being a big baby, like I stop stomping my feet

812
00:43:32,520 --> 00:43:38,040
Speaker 1: and like resisting everything, and started to look within myself

813
00:43:38,160 --> 00:43:41,600
Speaker 1: and do that kind of soul searching work to find

814
00:43:42,120 --> 00:43:44,040
Speaker 1: that little girl that I started out with.

815
00:43:44,320 --> 00:43:44,960
Speaker 3: Yeah.

816
00:43:45,040 --> 00:43:48,880
Speaker 1: I was born with her and I will die with her.

817
00:43:49,360 --> 00:43:52,360
Speaker 1: And I had to get really comfortable with that. That's

818
00:43:52,520 --> 00:43:54,920
Speaker 1: just the cards I've been dealt. It's me and her,

819
00:43:55,200 --> 00:43:58,000
Speaker 1: meaning my little self. Yeah, and I'm going to take

820
00:43:58,000 --> 00:43:59,680
Speaker 1: care of her and she's going to take care of me.

821
00:44:00,280 --> 00:44:03,560
Speaker 1: And I had to really figure out how to love

822
00:44:03,640 --> 00:44:07,320
Speaker 1: myself in a different way. And I think for women,

823
00:44:07,560 --> 00:44:10,400
Speaker 1: especially as you said, they it's a much more internal

824
00:44:10,440 --> 00:44:15,000
Speaker 1: process and there's nothing external that could fix it. No

825
00:44:15,680 --> 00:44:21,560
Speaker 1: big boobs or I don't know, jewelry whatever, none of

826
00:44:21,560 --> 00:44:24,239
Speaker 1: that is going to connect you back to yourself and

827
00:44:24,440 --> 00:44:26,359
Speaker 1: that at the end of the day, that connection back

828
00:44:26,360 --> 00:44:29,680
Speaker 1: to yourself, the true you, that little girl that you

829
00:44:29,800 --> 00:44:33,479
Speaker 1: love so much, that's all that matters. And then from

830
00:44:33,600 --> 00:44:38,040
Speaker 1: that point your life just sort of opens up in

831
00:44:38,120 --> 00:44:40,880
Speaker 1: a different way and you see different paths as you

832
00:44:40,920 --> 00:44:43,919
Speaker 1: go forward. And if you're not, if you're a woman

833
00:44:43,920 --> 00:44:49,800
Speaker 1: who's in it, I know it sucks. I just want

834
00:44:49,840 --> 00:44:53,799
Speaker 1: women to allow themselves to be in that place of

835
00:44:53,840 --> 00:44:57,319
Speaker 1: it sucking. This sucks, and I want women to get

836
00:44:57,400 --> 00:45:01,520
Speaker 1: quiet and not try to drown it out with other noises. Right,

837
00:45:01,760 --> 00:45:04,680
Speaker 1: sit in your feelings, sit in your discomfort, sit in

838
00:45:04,719 --> 00:45:08,440
Speaker 1: your unknowing, and then if you are quiet enough and

839
00:45:08,480 --> 00:45:11,680
Speaker 1: you love yourself enough, like getting to that loving yourself

840
00:45:11,719 --> 00:45:14,920
Speaker 1: is really hard, so so hard for some people. But

841
00:45:15,000 --> 00:45:17,319
Speaker 1: when you get to that place of realizing, hey, it's

842
00:45:17,760 --> 00:45:21,160
Speaker 1: me and you kid from here on out, that's the

843
00:45:21,200 --> 00:45:24,080
Speaker 1: point where you're like, I've got something to live for,

844
00:45:24,239 --> 00:45:26,400
Speaker 1: Like I know, yeah, I have my kids to live for,

845
00:45:26,520 --> 00:45:28,600
Speaker 1: and I want that, but it had to be something

846
00:45:28,800 --> 00:45:31,440
Speaker 1: more personal for me, even more personal, and that was

847
00:45:31,960 --> 00:45:34,160
Speaker 1: you know, I just hope that women give themselves the

848
00:45:34,200 --> 00:45:37,400
Speaker 1: opportunity to know that this happens to people. This is normal,

849
00:45:37,960 --> 00:45:42,880
Speaker 1: Like this breakdown, these moments of like complete confusion and

850
00:45:42,960 --> 00:45:45,879
Speaker 1: despair and you know the things, you don't know what's

851
00:45:45,880 --> 00:45:49,200
Speaker 1: going to happen next, that's so normal. Just know in

852
00:45:49,239 --> 00:45:51,600
Speaker 1: your core that you're going to get through it. Everything's

853
00:45:51,680 --> 00:45:55,040
Speaker 1: going to be okay, and you have the rest of

854
00:45:55,080 --> 00:45:57,680
Speaker 1: your life to get whatever you want, Like, you know,

855
00:45:57,719 --> 00:46:00,279
Speaker 1: it's just it's again. It kind of feels like it's

856
00:46:00,320 --> 00:46:07,759
Speaker 1: like reframing negative thoughts, reframing, you know, maybe some of

857
00:46:07,800 --> 00:46:11,319
Speaker 1: the reality than the awful reality that you've experienced in

858
00:46:11,320 --> 00:46:15,759
Speaker 1: your life previously. Just making a real concerted effort to

859
00:46:15,880 --> 00:46:19,040
Speaker 1: change your story within yourself.

860
00:46:20,840 --> 00:46:22,840
Speaker 3: So great. I'm so glad you're talking about it, because

861
00:46:22,880 --> 00:46:23,600
Speaker 3: it is normal.

862
00:46:23,680 --> 00:46:25,719
Speaker 2: But I don't think if we don't talk about it,

863
00:46:25,760 --> 00:46:28,080
Speaker 2: people don't think it's normal. People don't feel like it's normal,

864
00:46:28,120 --> 00:46:29,200
Speaker 2: and they're like, what's happening to me?

865
00:46:29,280 --> 00:46:29,920
Speaker 3: This is weird?

866
00:46:30,080 --> 00:46:32,279
Speaker 2: Oh God, now you got to talk about it. We've

867
00:46:32,280 --> 00:46:33,840
Speaker 2: got to talk about it. So I'm so glad that

868
00:46:33,880 --> 00:46:34,080
Speaker 2: you do.

869
00:46:34,480 --> 00:46:36,560
Speaker 1: I thought I was so broken. I thought I was

870
00:46:36,600 --> 00:46:39,719
Speaker 1: so broken, and like, you know, different than everybody else,

871
00:46:39,760 --> 00:46:42,200
Speaker 1: and why can't I be happy? And what's wrong with me?

872
00:46:42,440 --> 00:46:45,480
Speaker 1: And you know, nobody ever look at them. They're so happy.

873
00:46:45,520 --> 00:46:48,200
Speaker 1: Everybody's so happy. Everybody's got these lives that I love,

874
00:46:48,680 --> 00:46:51,279
Speaker 1: and I just really, for a long time was like

875
00:46:51,320 --> 00:46:54,040
Speaker 1: sitting in the bottom of that toilet bowl, going, ugh,

876
00:46:54,120 --> 00:46:55,640
Speaker 1: what about you know, what am I going to do?

877
00:46:56,800 --> 00:46:57,880
Speaker 3: Yeah? But it's it.

878
00:46:58,760 --> 00:47:02,440
Speaker 1: Let me be like example, you can change it for yourself.

879
00:47:02,480 --> 00:47:04,120
Speaker 1: That's good. But you have to do it for yourself

880
00:47:04,160 --> 00:47:06,680
Speaker 1: because guess what, you're the only one who can do it.

881
00:47:07,080 --> 00:47:23,760
Speaker 2: That's right, Okay, the as promised lightning, round lightning.

882
00:47:29,320 --> 00:47:32,400
Speaker 3: Who do you feel closer to? Kelly Taylor or Val Tyler?

883
00:47:33,880 --> 00:47:38,840
Speaker 1: Kelly Taylor. I think Val was fun, but she was

884
00:47:38,960 --> 00:47:43,959
Speaker 1: so anxious and agitated and always like freaking out about

885
00:47:43,960 --> 00:47:46,120
Speaker 1: something that took a lot of energy. Kelly was just

886
00:47:46,160 --> 00:47:49,640
Speaker 1: getting you know, like stabbed and shot and stalked and

887
00:47:49,960 --> 00:47:54,200
Speaker 1: burned and all the things. That's nothing perfect.

888
00:47:54,800 --> 00:47:56,239
Speaker 3: What's the best part of getting older?

889
00:47:56,840 --> 00:47:59,920
Speaker 1: The best part of getting older is the connection you

890
00:48:00,120 --> 00:48:05,279
Speaker 1: get back to yourself, that confidence that you never could

891
00:48:05,360 --> 00:48:10,400
Speaker 1: quite grasp when you were younger, The knowing of like

892
00:48:11,000 --> 00:48:15,200
Speaker 1: who you truly are and what you truly want, and

893
00:48:16,160 --> 00:48:18,480
Speaker 1: not worrying about any of the other stuff.

894
00:48:19,920 --> 00:48:22,960
Speaker 3: Love it. What's your best skincare tip?

895
00:48:23,640 --> 00:48:26,480
Speaker 1: Well, obviously wash your face every morning and every night.

896
00:48:27,840 --> 00:48:30,280
Speaker 1: I use really great products. I work with a brand

897
00:48:30,320 --> 00:48:32,839
Speaker 1: called Paracone MD, which was from the nineties. I don't

898
00:48:32,840 --> 00:48:37,880
Speaker 1: know if you anybody remembers it, remember it's still around.

899
00:48:37,960 --> 00:48:40,120
Speaker 1: I'm still using it. They have a lot of cool stuff.

900
00:48:40,440 --> 00:48:44,400
Speaker 1: I love products, so I'm always trying something new. I

901
00:48:44,480 --> 00:48:47,440
Speaker 1: like exfoliating at least once a week.

902
00:48:47,680 --> 00:48:49,400
Speaker 3: Yeah you too. I'm on the once a week.

903
00:48:49,480 --> 00:48:53,200
Speaker 1: And then just replenishing it. Yeah, but there's no gadget

904
00:48:53,239 --> 00:48:57,839
Speaker 1: I won't buy. Oh light wand will make my I'll

905
00:48:57,840 --> 00:49:01,200
Speaker 1: take it. Oh this jiggly thing will my arm fat? Oh,

906
00:49:01,239 --> 00:49:04,160
Speaker 1: I'll buy that too, unless it's like too expensive. And

907
00:49:04,200 --> 00:49:06,600
Speaker 1: then I'm like, no, I can't do that, but yeah,

908
00:49:06,680 --> 00:49:08,640
Speaker 1: I try it all. Just see what works for you.

909
00:49:08,920 --> 00:49:11,800
Speaker 1: I just started spraying toner, okay, I making I was

910
00:49:11,840 --> 00:49:15,520
Speaker 1: spraying a blend of toner and essential oils, and a

911
00:49:15,520 --> 00:49:17,880
Speaker 1: long time ago someone told me, oh, don't put essential

912
00:49:17,880 --> 00:49:21,480
Speaker 1: oils on your face. It might enlarge your pores or

913
00:49:21,520 --> 00:49:24,200
Speaker 1: give you weird white spots. So I started to notice,

914
00:49:24,239 --> 00:49:26,680
Speaker 1: oh my, a few pores are like getting big. What's

915
00:49:26,719 --> 00:49:29,200
Speaker 1: going on? And then I thought, I've been putting essential

916
00:49:29,239 --> 00:49:31,520
Speaker 1: oils on my face. So I dialed back on that,

917
00:49:31,640 --> 00:49:34,080
Speaker 1: and now I'm just using a straight toner. I make

918
00:49:34,120 --> 00:49:39,640
Speaker 1: it myself with witch hazel, uh, the witch hazel tonic

919
00:49:39,719 --> 00:49:43,239
Speaker 1: whatever that's called. Ye, and then I added hyaluronic acid, right,

920
00:49:43,840 --> 00:49:46,080
Speaker 1: and then that's what I spray on my face all

921
00:49:46,120 --> 00:49:47,359
Speaker 1: day live like all day.

922
00:49:47,640 --> 00:49:50,319
Speaker 2: I love that I have a big skincare junkie as well,

923
00:49:50,320 --> 00:49:52,280
Speaker 2: and I'll buy it all if it's not too expensive,

924
00:49:52,360 --> 00:49:54,080
Speaker 2: Like I've got the red light therapy masks.

925
00:49:54,160 --> 00:49:55,320
Speaker 1: Do you have beautiful skin?

926
00:49:55,680 --> 00:49:58,040
Speaker 2: They thank you, you do too, But I, you know,

927
00:49:58,280 --> 00:50:00,480
Speaker 2: I work at it a lot and buy a lot

928
00:50:00,520 --> 00:50:04,000
Speaker 2: of things. And I actually it made me feel better

929
00:50:04,000 --> 00:50:07,840
Speaker 2: to like dive into the science of these things, like, Okay,

930
00:50:07,840 --> 00:50:08,719
Speaker 2: what's actually.

931
00:50:08,400 --> 00:50:09,680
Speaker 3: Being absorbed by the skin here?

932
00:50:09,840 --> 00:50:13,760
Speaker 2: Like right, you know, topical collagen is not actually getting

933
00:50:13,760 --> 00:50:15,400
Speaker 2: absorbed into my skin, so I have to eat it,

934
00:50:15,440 --> 00:50:17,839
Speaker 2: you know. Like figuring out the science made me feel

935
00:50:17,880 --> 00:50:22,359
Speaker 2: like a better skincare consumer. And also like I wasn't

936
00:50:22,400 --> 00:50:26,680
Speaker 2: getting scammed every five seconds by an influenced by every

937
00:50:26,719 --> 00:50:28,160
Speaker 2: product I would see.

938
00:50:28,480 --> 00:50:31,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly. Also it's like the realization that this is

939
00:50:31,760 --> 00:50:35,200
Speaker 1: my skin for the rest of my life, right, like

940
00:50:35,520 --> 00:50:36,920
Speaker 1: I have got to take.

941
00:50:36,719 --> 00:50:39,239
Speaker 2: Care of it, yeah, which I didn't do until I

942
00:50:39,239 --> 00:50:39,840
Speaker 2: turned forty.

943
00:50:39,960 --> 00:50:40,320
Speaker 3: I did not.

944
00:50:41,000 --> 00:50:46,359
Speaker 2: I was an ivory or like a dove soap girl

945
00:50:46,840 --> 00:50:49,920
Speaker 2: until my forties, like no products, none, and I'd go

946
00:50:49,920 --> 00:50:51,560
Speaker 2: to one and they would put you know, makeup on

947
00:50:52,040 --> 00:50:52,600
Speaker 2: and do all that.

948
00:50:52,640 --> 00:50:54,640
Speaker 3: So I never thought about it until my forties and

949
00:50:54,680 --> 00:50:55,560
Speaker 3: then I got obsessed.

950
00:50:56,160 --> 00:51:01,000
Speaker 2: Yeah good, Okay, what's the best vacation you ever took?

951
00:51:01,840 --> 00:51:02,000
Speaker 3: Oh?

952
00:51:02,040 --> 00:51:04,640
Speaker 1: Well, it was a recent one. It was we went

953
00:51:04,719 --> 00:51:10,520
Speaker 1: to Saint Lucia Nice, which is a little island, and

954
00:51:11,800 --> 00:51:15,080
Speaker 1: we it was just the girls and my husband and me,

955
00:51:15,400 --> 00:51:18,799
Speaker 1: and it was just so no plans, just go with

956
00:51:18,920 --> 00:51:22,360
Speaker 1: the flow and we just had the best time. I

957
00:51:22,440 --> 00:51:25,080
Speaker 1: think that's one of my favorite things to do whenever

958
00:51:25,120 --> 00:51:27,799
Speaker 1: we go away, is to not plan anything. There's no

959
00:51:28,080 --> 00:51:32,279
Speaker 1: like sightseeing tour or any you know, grit all of

960
00:51:32,480 --> 00:51:36,200
Speaker 1: tasting whatever. It's just get up, go outside, see what

961
00:51:36,560 --> 00:51:40,200
Speaker 1: beckons you and go that direction. And that's what we did,

962
00:51:40,239 --> 00:51:42,319
Speaker 1: and those are my favorite kind of holidays.

963
00:51:42,680 --> 00:51:43,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, magical.

964
00:51:45,560 --> 00:51:49,920
Speaker 2: What's the best teen drama of all time? Besides nine

965
00:51:49,960 --> 00:51:51,560
Speaker 2: O two and zero woo?

966
00:51:52,600 --> 00:51:56,520
Speaker 1: I didn't watch many others because I was working fourteen, sixteen,

967
00:51:56,600 --> 00:52:00,880
Speaker 1: eighteen hours a day, so I didn't, but I really

968
00:52:01,120 --> 00:52:04,240
Speaker 1: when my girls were little, we loved watching Lizzie McGuire.

969
00:52:04,360 --> 00:52:09,319
Speaker 1: Uh huh. They I loved Fame, you remember that show,

970
00:52:09,400 --> 00:52:13,759
Speaker 1: Fame from New York City and dancers, and since I

971
00:52:13,760 --> 00:52:15,920
Speaker 1: always thought, oh I want to be a dancer, I

972
00:52:15,960 --> 00:52:16,959
Speaker 1: loved that show Fame.

973
00:52:16,960 --> 00:52:19,200
Speaker 3: It's a good one. I think my favorite was My

974
00:52:19,239 --> 00:52:21,840
Speaker 3: So called Life, but it was like one season. It

975
00:52:21,920 --> 00:52:22,640
Speaker 3: was way too short.

976
00:52:23,200 --> 00:52:27,280
Speaker 1: Yeah I didn't watch it, but I know everybody loved it. Yeah,

977
00:52:27,320 --> 00:52:27,719
Speaker 1: it's good.

978
00:52:27,760 --> 00:52:28,680
Speaker 3: Party of Five was good.

979
00:52:29,080 --> 00:52:30,360
Speaker 1: Never saw honestly was obsessed with.

980
00:52:30,400 --> 00:52:32,239
Speaker 3: Nine to two and O two and then the other

981
00:52:32,280 --> 00:52:34,440
Speaker 3: general like the Next Generation had Gossip Girl and The

982
00:52:34,480 --> 00:52:36,239
Speaker 3: OC and I didn't watch those.

983
00:52:36,280 --> 00:52:40,680
Speaker 2: But if nineties television were having a prom, who would

984
00:52:40,719 --> 00:52:41,520
Speaker 2: King and Queen be?

985
00:52:43,080 --> 00:52:48,680
Speaker 1: Well, I would say Brandon and Kelly just because, but

986
00:52:48,800 --> 00:52:51,719
Speaker 1: I kind of the person in me that wants to

987
00:52:51,760 --> 00:52:55,040
Speaker 1: be like, you know, oh no, let your light shine,

988
00:52:55,239 --> 00:52:57,480
Speaker 1: I would go ahead and say David and Donna.

989
00:52:58,320 --> 00:53:00,400
Speaker 3: Oh that's cute.

990
00:53:00,600 --> 00:53:04,959
Speaker 2: Yeah, they were a great couple. They were a great couple. Okay,

991
00:53:05,040 --> 00:53:06,879
Speaker 2: this is the last question. It's the most important question

992
00:53:06,960 --> 00:53:08,960
Speaker 2: to me. We ask it at the end of every podcast.

993
00:53:09,400 --> 00:53:17,319
Speaker 2: When is it iced coffee season? Never tell me more?

994
00:53:17,520 --> 00:53:22,759
Speaker 1: Sorry, yeah, uh, I don't like iced coffee. I don't

995
00:53:22,800 --> 00:53:25,680
Speaker 1: like coffee. I don't drink coffee. I think I'm like

996
00:53:25,719 --> 00:53:29,120
Speaker 1: a weird person. But no, I drink tea. And if

997
00:53:29,120 --> 00:53:31,960
Speaker 1: I ever have a tea, it's gonna be hot, yep, okay, yeah,

998
00:53:31,960 --> 00:53:36,839
Speaker 1: we're yss hold please yeah, when it's summer, you I

999
00:53:36,880 --> 00:53:39,560
Speaker 1: could switch to an iced tea. You're right, when it's.

1000
00:53:39,520 --> 00:53:40,760
Speaker 3: Really hot, okay.

1001
00:53:41,120 --> 00:53:43,239
Speaker 1: But sometimes even when it's really hot, I need a

1002
00:53:43,239 --> 00:53:43,600
Speaker 1: hot tea.

1003
00:53:43,680 --> 00:53:44,840
Speaker 3: But never an iced coffee.

1004
00:53:45,280 --> 00:53:47,240
Speaker 1: No, no, no, no, never a nice coffee.

1005
00:53:47,280 --> 00:53:51,200
Speaker 3: Sorry, that's okay.

1006
00:53:51,640 --> 00:53:54,279
Speaker 2: We've had this answer before. It's the incorrect answer, but

1007
00:53:54,320 --> 00:53:57,000
Speaker 2: we've had it before. It's fine, You're still we still

1008
00:53:57,040 --> 00:53:59,680
Speaker 2: love you. Jenny Garth, thank you so much for coming

1009
00:53:59,680 --> 00:54:01,960
Speaker 2: on Off Cup. This is really really great and I

1010
00:54:02,000 --> 00:54:03,680
Speaker 2: loved I loved all of your advice.

1011
00:54:04,120 --> 00:54:04,440
Speaker 3: Truly.

1012
00:54:04,880 --> 00:54:06,359
Speaker 1: I love talking to you. Thank you.

1013
00:54:08,600 --> 00:54:10,640
Speaker 3: Coming up next week on Off the Cup, I talk

1014
00:54:10,800 --> 00:54:11,560
Speaker 3: to Ricky Lake.

1015
00:54:12,200 --> 00:54:14,800
Speaker 5: I love like the reinventions that I've had. I thrive

1016
00:54:15,000 --> 00:54:18,640
Speaker 5: on just trying new things, proving myself to myself and

1017
00:54:18,680 --> 00:54:20,960
Speaker 5: to others that I can like make a documentary that's

1018
00:54:20,960 --> 00:54:23,280
Speaker 5: going to actually kind of change the world.

1019
00:54:24,920 --> 00:54:27,319
Speaker 2: Off the Cup is a production of iHeart Podcasts as

1020
00:54:27,360 --> 00:54:29,799
Speaker 2: part of the Reason Choice Network. If you want more,

1021
00:54:29,920 --> 00:54:33,560
Speaker 2: check out the other Reason Choice podcasts Spolitics with Jamel

1022
00:54:33,640 --> 00:54:36,480
Speaker 2: Hill and Native Land Pod. For Off the Cup, I

1023
00:54:36,480 --> 00:54:39,160
Speaker 2: am your host, Si Cup, editing and sound design by

1024
00:54:39,200 --> 00:54:40,040
Speaker 2: Derek Clements.

1025
00:54:40,120 --> 00:54:41,680
Speaker 3: Our executive producers are.

1026
00:54:41,640 --> 00:54:45,440
Speaker 2: Me Si Coup, Lauren Hanson, and Lindsay Hoffman. Rate and

1027
00:54:45,480 --> 00:54:49,200
Speaker 2: review wherever you get your podcasts. Follow or subscribe for

1028
00:54:49,360 --> 00:54:56,160
Speaker 2: new episodes every Wednesday,