1 00:00:00,480 --> 00:00:03,360 Speaker 1: Time now for today's Strawberry Letter and listen. If you 2 00:00:03,560 --> 00:00:07,800 Speaker 1: need advice on sex, on relationships, on dating, on work, 3 00:00:07,920 --> 00:00:11,880 Speaker 1: on parenting, and more, please submit your Strawberry Letter to 4 00:00:12,200 --> 00:00:16,079 Speaker 1: Steve Harvey FM and klick submit Strawberry Letter. Okay, we 5 00:00:16,120 --> 00:00:19,080 Speaker 1: could be reading your letter live on the air, just 6 00:00:19,120 --> 00:00:22,040 Speaker 1: like we're gonna read this one. Here that jay right here, 7 00:00:22,239 --> 00:00:24,880 Speaker 1: right now. That's for you. Then, yeah, buckle love and 8 00:00:25,000 --> 00:00:26,920 Speaker 1: hold on tight. We got it for you. Here it 9 00:00:26,960 --> 00:00:31,040 Speaker 1: is Strawberry Letter. Thank you, nephew. Subject. I need more 10 00:00:31,120 --> 00:00:35,800 Speaker 1: than hugging and hunching. Dear Stephen Shirley, I am engaged 11 00:00:35,840 --> 00:00:38,640 Speaker 1: to a sixty three year old man that acts a 12 00:00:38,640 --> 00:00:42,680 Speaker 1: lot older than he is. His thoughts on sex and 13 00:00:42,800 --> 00:00:45,640 Speaker 1: life in general shock me and I need some advice. 14 00:00:46,040 --> 00:00:49,040 Speaker 1: I'm only fifty nine years old and I still enjoy sex, 15 00:00:49,040 --> 00:00:51,479 Speaker 1: and I have tried to be patient with my man. 16 00:00:51,760 --> 00:00:54,240 Speaker 1: He thinks I'm a freak because I try to initiate 17 00:00:54,320 --> 00:00:57,680 Speaker 1: sex daily. He likes to grind and do a lot 18 00:00:57,680 --> 00:01:01,800 Speaker 1: of kissing, but we rarely go all the way. I 19 00:01:02,000 --> 00:01:04,080 Speaker 1: like to take care of him in other ways, if 20 00:01:04,080 --> 00:01:06,720 Speaker 1: you know what I mean. But when it comes to me, 21 00:01:06,800 --> 00:01:09,200 Speaker 1: he says, that his mouth is designed to eat food 22 00:01:09,240 --> 00:01:12,560 Speaker 1: and nothing else. He won't even kiss around it. I'm 23 00:01:12,600 --> 00:01:14,919 Speaker 1: in love with this man and I am looking forward 24 00:01:14,959 --> 00:01:17,600 Speaker 1: to a lifetime with him, but I am going to 25 00:01:17,720 --> 00:01:21,160 Speaker 1: need sex often. He says demeaning things to me when 26 00:01:21,160 --> 00:01:22,960 Speaker 1: I try to get him to be freaky with me, 27 00:01:23,200 --> 00:01:25,959 Speaker 1: so I've stopped him from hunting on me or rubbing 28 00:01:26,000 --> 00:01:28,319 Speaker 1: on me In the bedroom, I just lie there and 29 00:01:28,360 --> 00:01:29,959 Speaker 1: wait for him to go to sleep so I can 30 00:01:29,959 --> 00:01:32,920 Speaker 1: handle my business by myself. I am letting you all 31 00:01:33,000 --> 00:01:35,760 Speaker 1: know that I feel like cheating on this guy, and 32 00:01:35,840 --> 00:01:39,320 Speaker 1: I have my ex on standby just in case. I 33 00:01:39,360 --> 00:01:41,840 Speaker 1: have asked my man why he proposed to me, and 34 00:01:41,920 --> 00:01:44,000 Speaker 1: he said he loves me and he wants to show 35 00:01:44,000 --> 00:01:46,520 Speaker 1: me that there's a lot more to a great marriage 36 00:01:46,560 --> 00:01:50,160 Speaker 1: than just sex. It's not that he can't perform, because 37 00:01:50,160 --> 00:01:53,000 Speaker 1: he is always ready, he just doesn't want to do 38 00:01:53,040 --> 00:01:56,560 Speaker 1: the do So should I follow my man's lead and 39 00:01:56,560 --> 00:01:59,680 Speaker 1: stop pressuring him for sex. I'm afraid he may never 40 00:01:59,800 --> 00:02:01,760 Speaker 1: chang change his ways, and I may end up in 41 00:02:01,760 --> 00:02:04,880 Speaker 1: a sexless marriage. I'm not getting any younger, so should 42 00:02:04,880 --> 00:02:07,640 Speaker 1: I marry him or move on and find myself in 43 00:02:07,680 --> 00:02:12,200 Speaker 1: a more compatible, find myself a more compatible mate. Yeah, 44 00:02:12,240 --> 00:02:14,840 Speaker 1: I think you need to find yourself a more compatible mate. 45 00:02:15,160 --> 00:02:19,560 Speaker 1: You and this guy don't add up sexually, and you 46 00:02:19,639 --> 00:02:22,960 Speaker 1: may end up in a sexless marriage. The good thing 47 00:02:22,960 --> 00:02:27,200 Speaker 1: about this is that you know this before you're married. 48 00:02:27,440 --> 00:02:31,080 Speaker 1: You you've found this out before you got married. Yeah. 49 00:02:31,120 --> 00:02:33,240 Speaker 1: He may never change his ways, and we as women 50 00:02:33,360 --> 00:02:35,880 Speaker 1: always want the man to change. But it doesn't look 51 00:02:35,919 --> 00:02:40,160 Speaker 1: like he's going to change. And you know he wants 52 00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:43,040 Speaker 1: to show you. He's already told you that a great 53 00:02:43,080 --> 00:02:45,880 Speaker 1: marriage can mean more than just sex. And that's not 54 00:02:45,960 --> 00:02:48,640 Speaker 1: what you're looking for. That is not what you're looking for. 55 00:02:48,840 --> 00:02:52,360 Speaker 1: So be clear. All the red flags are here. He's 56 00:02:52,400 --> 00:02:56,560 Speaker 1: sixty three, you're fifty nine. You try to initiate sex 57 00:02:56,919 --> 00:02:59,680 Speaker 1: daily at fifty nine, he's sixty three. You said he 58 00:02:59,720 --> 00:03:03,240 Speaker 1: acts a lot older. That's not gonna happen. So listen 59 00:03:04,480 --> 00:03:07,959 Speaker 1: and stop pressuring him. Please stop pressuring him. No one 60 00:03:08,000 --> 00:03:10,639 Speaker 1: wants to feel pressured. No one wants to be pressured. 61 00:03:11,360 --> 00:03:14,120 Speaker 1: I think if you, if you get with this man, 62 00:03:14,160 --> 00:03:20,720 Speaker 1: if you marry him, you'll be settling, and you shouldn't settle. Steve, well, well, well, 63 00:03:20,919 --> 00:03:26,280 Speaker 1: I need more than hugging and hunching. She's engaged to 64 00:03:26,320 --> 00:03:28,440 Speaker 1: a sixty three year old man and asks a lot 65 00:03:28,480 --> 00:03:34,120 Speaker 1: older than he is. Okay, his thoughts on sex in 66 00:03:34,200 --> 00:03:38,400 Speaker 1: life in general shock me, and I need some advice. Now. 67 00:03:38,440 --> 00:03:42,640 Speaker 1: She fifty nine years old, she still enjoys sex and 68 00:03:42,760 --> 00:03:45,800 Speaker 1: has tried to be patient with her man, and the 69 00:03:45,880 --> 00:03:50,400 Speaker 1: man thinks because she tries to initiate sex daily, she's 70 00:03:50,440 --> 00:03:54,680 Speaker 1: a freak. He likes to grind and do a lot 71 00:03:54,720 --> 00:03:59,000 Speaker 1: of kissing. Okay, that's good, that's full play. But we 72 00:03:59,240 --> 00:04:05,120 Speaker 1: rarely go all the way full play with no payoff. 73 00:04:06,680 --> 00:04:10,760 Speaker 1: It's what we're talking about. Now. I get you all 74 00:04:10,920 --> 00:04:15,600 Speaker 1: worked up for no damn reason at all. I like 75 00:04:15,720 --> 00:04:17,760 Speaker 1: to take care of him in other ways, if you 76 00:04:17,800 --> 00:04:19,400 Speaker 1: know what I mean. No, we don't know what you mean. 77 00:04:19,440 --> 00:04:27,440 Speaker 1: You're fifty nine, gonna type it? Yeah? Ground him, yeah, yeah, yeah. 78 00:04:27,880 --> 00:04:29,640 Speaker 1: I like to take care of him in other words, 79 00:04:29,680 --> 00:04:33,560 Speaker 1: if you know what I mean? Game? What what? I 80 00:04:33,680 --> 00:04:35,400 Speaker 1: like to take care of him in other ways, if 81 00:04:35,440 --> 00:04:37,000 Speaker 1: you know what I mean. But when it comes to me, 82 00:04:38,600 --> 00:04:44,800 Speaker 1: he says that, he said, when it comes to me, 83 00:04:45,720 --> 00:04:48,839 Speaker 1: he said, his mouth is designed to eat food and 84 00:04:49,040 --> 00:05:01,599 Speaker 1: nothing else. He won't even kiss around it. Wo she's 85 00:05:01,680 --> 00:05:05,520 Speaker 1: pretty explicit without saying it, she pretty much stack it. 86 00:05:08,440 --> 00:05:10,680 Speaker 1: I'm gonna have some thoughts you might want to get 87 00:05:10,720 --> 00:05:13,719 Speaker 1: out of me, Lady Dad, don't think you want my answers. Now. 88 00:05:15,560 --> 00:05:17,560 Speaker 1: I'm in love with this man looking for a lifetime, 89 00:05:17,600 --> 00:05:20,000 Speaker 1: but I'm going to need some sex often he says 90 00:05:20,040 --> 00:05:21,800 Speaker 1: the meaning things to me when I to try to 91 00:05:21,839 --> 00:05:25,120 Speaker 1: get and be freaking. So I just stop him from 92 00:05:25,200 --> 00:05:27,520 Speaker 1: hunching on me, a rubbing on me in the bedroom. 93 00:05:27,560 --> 00:05:29,280 Speaker 1: I just lay that way through and go sleeps like 94 00:05:29,480 --> 00:05:32,599 Speaker 1: hind of my business by myself. I'm letting y'all know 95 00:05:32,680 --> 00:05:34,440 Speaker 1: I feel like cheating on this guy. See here was 96 00:05:34,440 --> 00:05:36,600 Speaker 1: going now, this is what the letter really about. Y'all 97 00:05:36,680 --> 00:05:38,480 Speaker 1: doubt all that was a set up for this. Hell. 98 00:05:39,000 --> 00:05:42,840 Speaker 1: I'm letting you all know right now, I feel like 99 00:05:43,000 --> 00:05:47,239 Speaker 1: cheating on this guy. This is what the letter is about. 100 00:05:48,960 --> 00:05:52,920 Speaker 1: We can't help you. We ain't got no suggestions for you. 101 00:05:54,320 --> 00:05:57,599 Speaker 1: We don't know what's wrong with him. Who the hell? 102 00:05:57,680 --> 00:06:02,120 Speaker 1: Like the hunch all is hard kissing and hunching. What 103 00:06:02,120 --> 00:06:08,720 Speaker 1: what I'm letting y'all know? I feel like she know 104 00:06:08,920 --> 00:06:12,159 Speaker 1: this guy, and I have my X on stand by 105 00:06:12,279 --> 00:06:17,720 Speaker 1: justin k this relationship is over. You got your X 106 00:06:17,800 --> 00:06:24,320 Speaker 1: on standby? Why because he beat Jack Johnson? What because 107 00:06:24,360 --> 00:06:35,800 Speaker 1: he the dude? And all? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm just 108 00:06:35,920 --> 00:06:39,960 Speaker 1: asking her what the problem is? Yeah, all right, when 109 00:06:39,960 --> 00:06:42,120 Speaker 1: I come back, I'll tell you what the problem is. 110 00:06:42,279 --> 00:06:44,520 Speaker 1: All right. We'll have part two of Steve's response coming 111 00:06:44,600 --> 00:06:47,680 Speaker 1: up in twenty three minutes after the hour Today's Strawberry 112 00:06:47,760 --> 00:06:51,520 Speaker 1: Letters subjects. I need more than hugging and hunching. That's 113 00:06:51,560 --> 00:06:56,960 Speaker 1: coming up right after this. You're listening, all right, Steve, 114 00:06:57,040 --> 00:06:59,760 Speaker 1: Come on, let's recap today's Strawberry letter. I need more 115 00:07:00,279 --> 00:07:03,400 Speaker 1: that hugging and hunting, but just gonna get to it. 116 00:07:03,520 --> 00:07:05,600 Speaker 1: I need more than hug in a huntred sixty three 117 00:07:05,640 --> 00:07:08,480 Speaker 1: year old lady man to this man act older than 118 00:07:08,560 --> 00:07:12,040 Speaker 1: he is. His thoughts on sex in life in general 119 00:07:12,200 --> 00:07:16,440 Speaker 1: have shocked me. I need some advice to grind and 120 00:07:16,520 --> 00:07:19,760 Speaker 1: do a lot of kissing, but we rarely, rarely go 121 00:07:19,960 --> 00:07:22,000 Speaker 1: all the way. I like to take care of him 122 00:07:22,000 --> 00:07:23,520 Speaker 1: in other words, if you know what I mean. But 123 00:07:23,600 --> 00:07:25,200 Speaker 1: when it comes to me, he says his mouth and 124 00:07:25,320 --> 00:07:29,440 Speaker 1: designed to eat food and nothing else. He won't even 125 00:07:29,520 --> 00:07:34,040 Speaker 1: kiss around it. Around it. Now, let's think about this. 126 00:07:34,600 --> 00:07:38,040 Speaker 1: You got a man that won't have sex and go 127 00:07:38,240 --> 00:07:42,160 Speaker 1: all the way, and you got a man that won't 128 00:07:42,200 --> 00:07:53,480 Speaker 1: even kiss around Okay, what's wrong with it? Hell? Yeah? Yeah, 129 00:07:54,000 --> 00:07:57,000 Speaker 1: go ahead and see. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, 130 00:07:57,040 --> 00:08:02,160 Speaker 1: it's real. You hear it. This is real. On here's 131 00:08:02,160 --> 00:08:05,520 Speaker 1: a man that liked to kiss and hug and grind 132 00:08:05,680 --> 00:08:10,840 Speaker 1: a lot. You take care of many other words, in 133 00:08:10,880 --> 00:08:12,320 Speaker 1: other words, if you know what I mean. But when 134 00:08:12,360 --> 00:08:14,800 Speaker 1: it comes to me, he says, his mouth is design 135 00:08:14,880 --> 00:08:17,800 Speaker 1: to eat food or nothing. He won't even kiss around it. 136 00:08:17,920 --> 00:08:29,160 Speaker 1: What wrong with it? It was wrong with it? I'm notause, Shelly, Shelly, 137 00:08:29,200 --> 00:08:32,079 Speaker 1: you listen to me. I'm he says the meaning things 138 00:08:32,080 --> 00:08:33,960 Speaker 1: to me when I try to be freaking No, I 139 00:08:33,960 --> 00:08:35,640 Speaker 1: want you to hear what I said. See, Shelly, I'm 140 00:08:35,640 --> 00:08:38,440 Speaker 1: gonna tell you something. I just lie away for people, 141 00:08:38,480 --> 00:08:40,559 Speaker 1: go sleep so I can handle my bears myself. I'm 142 00:08:40,600 --> 00:08:42,520 Speaker 1: letting y'all know I feel like cheating on this guy, 143 00:08:42,520 --> 00:08:44,320 Speaker 1: and I have my ex on stand by just in 144 00:08:44,440 --> 00:08:50,360 Speaker 1: case you gotta ex Why is he your ex? Question? Yeah? 145 00:08:50,559 --> 00:08:57,520 Speaker 1: What is wrong with why does this gets? Yeah? It 146 00:08:57,559 --> 00:09:02,160 Speaker 1: doesn't say she keeps getting exes? No, it says she 147 00:09:02,280 --> 00:09:07,839 Speaker 1: got an X on standby everybody him X, Well, what's 148 00:09:08,040 --> 00:09:14,360 Speaker 1: wrong with it? Question? Listen to me? You listen to me, 149 00:09:14,960 --> 00:09:17,840 Speaker 1: listen to me, but I don't. He can listen to me. 150 00:09:18,360 --> 00:09:21,440 Speaker 1: I know you don't because you're not listening. I'm listening. 151 00:09:21,600 --> 00:09:24,040 Speaker 1: I asked my man why he proposed me, and he 152 00:09:24,040 --> 00:09:26,280 Speaker 1: said he loves me and he wants to show me 153 00:09:26,520 --> 00:09:28,920 Speaker 1: that there's a lot more to a great marriage than 154 00:09:29,000 --> 00:09:32,880 Speaker 1: just sex. And I listen to this line, Shirley. It's 155 00:09:33,040 --> 00:09:39,280 Speaker 1: not that he can't perform, because he is always ready. 156 00:09:39,320 --> 00:09:42,760 Speaker 1: He just don't want to do the dude. So Shelley, 157 00:09:43,040 --> 00:09:46,560 Speaker 1: this other stuff she doing to him that lets her 158 00:09:46,720 --> 00:09:50,600 Speaker 1: know he's always ready, but he don't want to do 159 00:09:50,720 --> 00:09:57,400 Speaker 1: the dude makes me ponder the question, what it's wrong 160 00:09:57,520 --> 00:10:01,360 Speaker 1: with it? Something wrong with it? You all are not 161 00:10:01,400 --> 00:10:07,320 Speaker 1: gonna yeah, her fault. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I don't 162 00:10:06,160 --> 00:10:10,800 Speaker 1: say I don't see it. I'm not saying this her fault. 163 00:10:11,040 --> 00:10:14,480 Speaker 1: I'm just asking what's wrong with it? I'm wrong with it? 164 00:10:14,840 --> 00:10:19,160 Speaker 1: Couldn't be a problem, there's nothing. He's a man that 165 00:10:19,320 --> 00:10:23,240 Speaker 1: stayed ready all the time, but he don't want to 166 00:10:23,280 --> 00:10:26,559 Speaker 1: go all the way kissing around it. He is a 167 00:10:26,720 --> 00:10:31,720 Speaker 1: man that won't even kiss around it? Yeah, what's wrong 168 00:10:31,760 --> 00:10:38,760 Speaker 1: with now? I have some theories, albeit wrong theories, because 169 00:10:41,280 --> 00:10:44,720 Speaker 1: just because you are all agreed doesn't make you all right. Okay, 170 00:10:44,880 --> 00:10:51,040 Speaker 1: I disagree. I'm not mad. I'm not mad when more 171 00:10:51,120 --> 00:10:56,520 Speaker 1: than one is gathered together my name, come on, come on? 172 00:10:56,920 --> 00:11:08,160 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, any time a man Shirley, ye, something wrong 173 00:11:08,240 --> 00:11:14,200 Speaker 1: with it? No? No, why Shirley, Why there's something wrong 174 00:11:14,240 --> 00:11:21,200 Speaker 1: with it? Always no, he's always ready, so she don't 175 00:11:21,240 --> 00:11:23,960 Speaker 1: want to go all the way and then what she 176 00:11:24,040 --> 00:11:27,719 Speaker 1: wants something else. He won't even kiss around. He's not 177 00:11:27,840 --> 00:11:34,800 Speaker 1: into that. He's just not into that thing. You're not 178 00:11:34,920 --> 00:11:39,360 Speaker 1: into that. He's just not into it. He don't want 179 00:11:39,360 --> 00:11:41,920 Speaker 1: her to take he don't want her to do that. 180 00:11:43,600 --> 00:11:45,800 Speaker 1: What's wrong with it? He likes to kiss and all that, 181 00:11:45,880 --> 00:11:48,360 Speaker 1: he's just not into that all. That's what clothes on 182 00:11:49,720 --> 00:11:55,440 Speaker 1: hunching anyway. But he into the other thing, Shirley. He's 183 00:11:55,480 --> 00:11:58,920 Speaker 1: into the other thing. Well, because I know that most 184 00:11:58,960 --> 00:12:03,280 Speaker 1: men are when it's being done to them. Right, we 185 00:12:03,440 --> 00:12:08,720 Speaker 1: all have to agree with that. I'm okay, thank you? Yeah, 186 00:12:08,720 --> 00:12:17,320 Speaker 1: Oh Lord, Jesus, Jesus. We have all you guys, we 187 00:12:17,400 --> 00:12:25,280 Speaker 1: have all run up into world where rolls the front door. Sorry, 188 00:12:27,880 --> 00:12:37,439 Speaker 1: what is that? Anyway, you can post your comments if 189 00:12:37,480 --> 00:12:41,959 Speaker 1: you agree with Steve and the rest of this elementary 190 00:12:41,960 --> 00:12:44,600 Speaker 1: bunch we have in this room. You don't have to 191 00:12:44,600 --> 00:12:52,199 Speaker 1: agree with I don't care. Just type in us anyway. 192 00:12:52,840 --> 00:12:55,200 Speaker 1: Or you can post your comments on today's Strawberry Letter 193 00:12:55,240 --> 00:12:58,080 Speaker 1: at Steve Harvey FM on Instagram and Facebook, and don't 194 00:12:58,120 --> 00:13:01,320 Speaker 1: forget to check out the Strawberry Letter your podcast. You're 195 00:13:01,360 --> 00:13:03,839 Speaker 1: listening to the Stave Harvey Morning Show.