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Speaker 1: On this week's episode of Cultivating her Space.

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Speaker 2: I think part of what inspired me is the fact

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Speaker 2: that acting like it's not happening is not.

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Speaker 3: Going to make the problems go away.

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Speaker 2: And I wanted women like me to feel seen and represented,

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Speaker 2: and I wanted them to know that they're not on

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Speaker 2: their own.

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Speaker 1: Today's episode is sure to provides you with motivation, inspiration,

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Speaker 1: or a fresh perspective. If you have any AHA moments

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Speaker 1: or appreciate anything from this episode, please leave us a

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Speaker 1: review to let us know we're on the right track. Also,

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Speaker 1: we release episodes every Friday, so be sure to subscribe

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Speaker 1: on iTunes and visit cultivatinghurspace dot com to access our

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Speaker 1: exclusive after show and other bonus content from the Patreon tab.

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Speaker 4: Welcome to Cultivating her Space, a podcast dedicated to uplifting

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Speaker 4: women like you.

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Speaker 3: We're your hosts.

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Speaker 5: Doctor Dominie Broussard, a college professor and psychologist.

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Speaker 6: And Terry Lomax, a techy and motivational speaker. In a

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Speaker 6: world where black women are often misrepresented and misunderstood, please

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Speaker 6: join us as we initiate authentic conversations on everything from

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Speaker 6: fibroids to fake friends, and create a safe space where

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Speaker 6: black women can.

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Speaker 3: Just be lady. Today.

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Speaker 6: We have a very special guest that we are so

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Speaker 6: excited about, and so we're just going to jump right

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Speaker 6: on endto this bio so we can jump into this

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Speaker 6: juicy conversation.

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Speaker 3: Okay.

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Speaker 6: Saudia Asthma is a British Asian comedian breaking boundaries with

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Speaker 6: her insightful humor, thought provoking commentary, and infectious charm. Sadia

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Speaker 6: isn't just a comedian, she's a comedic for us, challenging

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Speaker 6: the status quo with her sharp wit and candid observations.

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Speaker 6: Saudia creates a world of laughter that provokes thought and

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Speaker 6: Foster's understanding. You can check her out on her podcast

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Speaker 6: No Country for Young Women, which tackles love, life and

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Speaker 6: work from a multicultural perspective. She's also the author of

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Speaker 6: Sex Bomb, where she navigated the nuances of British Asian

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Speaker 6: life with candor and wit. And if you're watching us

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Speaker 6: on Patreon, you can see that she just held up

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Speaker 6: her beautiful book sex Bomb.

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Speaker 3: Okay, there is so much more. There we go, there

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Speaker 3: we go.

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Speaker 6: There's so much more to Sadius. So we're going to

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Speaker 6: pass the mic to her and let you hear from

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Speaker 6: this force herself. Daddia, Welcome to Cultivating her Space. Hi,

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Speaker 6: thank you so much for having me.

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Speaker 2: When I first got the email about this, I was like,

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Speaker 2: this is such a dope podcast. I'm so lucky that

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Speaker 2: they even was this an accident? I didn't even know

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Speaker 2: like that you reached out. I was like, you've got

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Speaker 2: such a huge following and listenership, So that's really cool,

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Speaker 2: well done. It's not it's good work, but it's not imagine.

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Speaker 2: It's not been you know, easy all the time. But

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Speaker 2: I'm really impressed because you're just smart women doing very

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Speaker 2: cool things. And yeah, I yes, I would like to say,

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Speaker 2: hopefully in a similar way, I feel like the work

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Speaker 2: that we do is important because what we're authentic and

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Speaker 2: we're trying to just be ourselves as opposed to I

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Speaker 2: feel like sometimes you know what it is like, you know,

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Speaker 2: the red or the blue pill, and sometimes the world

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Speaker 2: wants you to be a version of yourself that's more

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Speaker 2: appeasing or more what's the world. I'm trying to say,

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Speaker 2: there's more in line with their kind of whatever is prejudices, perceptions, expectations, ignorance,

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Speaker 2: all those things.

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Speaker 3: And so that's what I feel like.

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Speaker 2: I'm so lucky with comedy, Like I feel like comedy

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Speaker 2: chose me rather than me choosing comedy. And I feel

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Speaker 2: like it basically gives you the freedom, especially in a

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Speaker 2: world that we live in now, where I feel like

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Speaker 2: so much more what we are allowed to say is

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Speaker 2: being policed in every sense. It gives me a freedom

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Speaker 2: to kind of play with ideas and kind of some

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Speaker 2: of those perceptions, and I guess focus on like what

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Speaker 2: makes us like the togetherness aspect of humans like, and

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Speaker 2: so much of what I do it's not maybe it's

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Speaker 2: not deliberately trying to be humanizing, but I feel like

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Speaker 2: that's an important part of it because as a missing woman,

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Speaker 2: we're headscarf, you know, I feel like there's been a

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Speaker 2: lot of dehumanization that has taken place, And so by

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Speaker 2: joking about some of the things I like to joke about, relationship, sex,

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Speaker 2: all of the above, it allows people to be, I guess,

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Speaker 2: in some sense, a little less afraid of us. Look

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Speaker 2: at we're here to be like trying to dismantle you know,

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Speaker 2: people's kind of own you know, anyway I'm talking too

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Speaker 2: too much, but not that we're here to always do

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Speaker 2: that work. But like if it's a byproduct of what

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Speaker 2: we're doing in our field. Then great. It's not something

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Speaker 2: that I expect all of you know, women, multicultural women

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Speaker 2: always to have to carry. But yeah, I feel like

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Speaker 2: it's just a nice thing to do in the fact

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Speaker 2: that so much of media it's focused on what makes

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Speaker 2: us a little different, and I think if sometimes we

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Speaker 2: can actually just show that actually we're human and we

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Speaker 2: do have so much in common.

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Speaker 3: It's a refreshing take on things. And don't I love that?

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Speaker 5: And Sadi, I love that you are starting us off

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Speaker 5: with dropping so many dim just in that quick blurb.

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Speaker 3: I am so excited for this conversation.

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Speaker 5: And I think that our quote of the day, which

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Speaker 5: will jump us, dive us into this conversation just it

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Speaker 5: just blends so well with the gems that you have

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Speaker 5: already shared, because these are your words. So as we

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Speaker 5: were prepping for the interview, we were looking at your book,

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Speaker 5: we were looking at your social media, and so our

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Speaker 5: quote of the day, both sextual liberation and faith are

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Speaker 5: not as your world by site or anyone other.

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Speaker 7: Than the person who beholds it.

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Speaker 5: And I'm gonna say that one more turn for the

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Speaker 5: folks in the bell both.

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Speaker 7: Sexual liberation and faith are not measurable by site or

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Speaker 7: anyone other than the person who beholds it.

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Speaker 5: Pray these are your words, your words, yes.

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Speaker 8: Thank you.

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Speaker 2: It's just because there's a lot of expectations on women

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Speaker 2: in general to demystify or I don't know, even justify

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Speaker 2: our take on things. And then part of having like yourself,

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Speaker 2: a platform where we speak, has I really learned, you know,

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Speaker 2: to pick my battles and you know that I don't

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Speaker 2: have to kind of talk on everything. And actually there's

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Speaker 2: also a power in what I don't say as well

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Speaker 2: as the things as I say, right, And I think

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Speaker 2: people people, I would just be dishonest if I was like,

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Speaker 2: you know, I don't like sex, you know, like and

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Speaker 2: it's just it's like I'm doing it from a comedic

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Speaker 2: side of things. But then the people who don't maybe

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Speaker 2: understand comedy so much sometimes they want you to explain

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Speaker 2: your act. Then we're not in the business of explaining

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Speaker 2: our choices to strangers or you know, it's up to interpretate.

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Speaker 2: It out is down to interpretation, and they can get

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Speaker 2: the joke or it can scratch their head.

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Speaker 3: But we do the work and we do the art.

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Speaker 2: And then they can like someone DM me on Instagram

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Speaker 2: because I get all these wild dms. So, oh, my

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Speaker 2: friend brought your book. I'd love to know what it's

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Speaker 2: all about. And I'm like, why do you buy the book?

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Speaker 2: Or why don't you go on Google? Like why are

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Speaker 2: you dming me? And think I think that's some of

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Speaker 2: the great social media is, like fantastic. I met my

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Speaker 2: editor on there and it made my book happen in

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Speaker 2: a in a space where you know, people from minorities

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Speaker 2: are you know, God, publishing is not a very diverse space,

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Speaker 2: Like from what I understand, it's like four percent in

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Speaker 2: the UK of diverse authors, and they think that's a lot.

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Speaker 2: So there are good things, but also that there are drawbacks,

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Speaker 2: and I think we need to kind of be mindful

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Speaker 2: of how much of ourselves we kind of just put

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Speaker 2: out there.

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Speaker 3: And allow allow you.

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Speaker 2: We need to need to keep something for ourselves. So

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Speaker 2: I didn't answer the DM. I don't intend to. Like

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Speaker 2: it makes sense to me that if you have a curiosity,

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Speaker 2: you go and look it up, you know, like I

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Speaker 2: would love to be sitting here dming Matthew McConaughey, but

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Speaker 2: I'm sure his wife, you know, probably.

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Speaker 3: Has something else to say about that.

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Speaker 2: So yeah, I mean, I think we're all on a

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Speaker 2: journey and our faith is in. My faith is really

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Speaker 2: really important, and there's times where it's stronger in times

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Speaker 2: where it could be stronger, And it's very personal, and

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Speaker 2: so you can't really sit down and explain every life

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Speaker 2: choice that you make. I look back, I know that

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Speaker 2: there's some things that could have done differently.

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Speaker 3: But yeah, they don't know me.

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Speaker 2: So it's like, why am I let's start talking to

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Speaker 2: some strangers for no reason?

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Speaker 3: Right?

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Speaker 6: Hey lady, it's Terry here, Dom and I want to

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Speaker 6: take a moment to thank you for choosing to listen

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Speaker 6: to our podcast. We love you for real, and we

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Speaker 6: want to give you a chance to learn more about

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Speaker 6: what's important to us. So tell us what you think

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Speaker 6: about this.

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Speaker 9: Imagine a world where you have a chance to get

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Speaker 9: featured on the Cultivating her Space podcast and share your business,

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Speaker 9: brand or perspective with millions around the globe. Imagine joining

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Speaker 9: our monthly virtual video check ins where you can connect

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Speaker 9: with like minded black women like you and share your

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Speaker 9: ideas and episode suggestions with Terry and I. Now, I

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Speaker 9: want you to imagine a world where you're in the

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Speaker 9: exclusive Cultivating her Space Sanctuary Slack channel, and throughout your

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Speaker 9: day and week, you are conversing with us about what's

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Speaker 9: happening in your life and sharing funny gifts and or

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Speaker 9: personal wins.

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Speaker 1: How does that sound?

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Speaker 6: Hopefully this is of your alley, lady, because we are

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Speaker 6: taking things to the next level this year, and we're

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Speaker 6: doubling down on investing in our community.

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Speaker 3: That means you.

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Speaker 6: We want to meet you, connect with you, and create

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Speaker 6: communities of genuine women who love on black women and

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Speaker 6: push our culture and movement forward. We launched this podcast

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Speaker 6: in twenty nineteen, and to date we have not missed

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Speaker 6: a week. We've been great stewards of our platform, all

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Speaker 6: while working full time and navigating our own ups and downs.

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Speaker 6: We release fresh new content every single Friday like clockwork,

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Speaker 6: and we have hundreds of valuable episodes and workshops that

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Speaker 6: can really help you up level your life. So if

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Speaker 6: you love our mission or you've gotten value from us,

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Speaker 6: we invite you to give back and help us push

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Speaker 6: this community effort forward. Visit Herspace podcast dot com and

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Speaker 6: click Patreon. You can learn more about our goals and

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Speaker 6: exclusive offerings on Patreon, and we highly highly encourage you

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Speaker 6: to join the Sister Frontier so that you can get

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Speaker 6: someone on one time with us. We also have an

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Speaker 6: option for you to donate on a one time basis

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Speaker 6: if that meets your needs. Again Herspace podcast dot com

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Speaker 6: and you can click that link that says Patreon. All right,

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Speaker 6: lady will hop right back into the conversation. Wow, that

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Speaker 6: is so powerful. I feel like a billion questions just

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Speaker 6: popped into my head. Books I want to I'm going

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Speaker 6: to try to stay organized mentally. Sosaudia, just a quick backstory.

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Speaker 6: So I grew up Christian, right, very religious household. I

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Speaker 6: grew up with a best friend who was Muslim, and

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Speaker 6: my parents were really strict, but her parents were like

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Speaker 6: extremely strict, like way stricter.

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Speaker 3: Than my parents. Even that was my experience.

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Speaker 6: And so when I think about what she was allowed

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Speaker 6: to do and what I was allowed to do was

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Speaker 6: very different. And I realized that glowing up, that there

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Speaker 6: was this big, this big gap.

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Speaker 3: I guess you could say, when.

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Speaker 6: You think about your journey, you know you are so courageous, right,

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Speaker 6: especially considering like what I've learned from my friend about

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Speaker 6: what's a pro create right and what's the status quo

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Speaker 6: and the norm in you know, in her in her household?

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Speaker 6: How did you become the Saudi that we see today?

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Speaker 6: Like what happened for you to become this woman you

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Speaker 6: are today? I would assume you didn't start off this

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Speaker 6: way as open and honest about your experiences.

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Speaker 2: I've been as such a profoundly deep question. So thank you,

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Speaker 2: and I think that you're right. I definitely wasn't always

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Speaker 2: kind of like talking about sex as freely, and I

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Speaker 2: think comedy was basically, you know, I haven't been very

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Speaker 2: lucky in love, and it was it was fortunate that

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Speaker 2: comedy seemed to kind of at least it used to.

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Speaker 2: It benefited my comedy if nothing else, Like, so people

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Speaker 2: would love to laugh at my love fails, like they'd

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Speaker 2: be like, yeah, yeah, because these things are relatable and

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Speaker 2: people like to kind of people love that a source, right,

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Speaker 2: they love that that kind of details, So it kind

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Speaker 2: of at least I think that's what I love about comedy,

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Speaker 2: is that you can make some out of something bad,

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Speaker 2: like the negative, or something out of nothing. At least

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Speaker 2: it's not all for nothing, because if people laugh, it

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Speaker 2: feels like it wasn't at least all bad.

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Speaker 3: And so yeah, no, I hear you.

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Speaker 2: I don't think that my upbringing was very strict, but

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Speaker 2: I do think that what I'm doing is unfamiliar to

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Speaker 2: a lot of people, including Muslims, and I think therefore

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Speaker 2: they have to kind of use their own thought process

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Speaker 2: and critical thinking and analysis, like what is this? I've

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Speaker 2: had misley women like I've tried to give the book

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Speaker 2: to say, oh, that's Harram, and I'm like, but you

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Speaker 2: haven't even read it or anything like that. So you know,

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Speaker 2: it's it's a journey that like, I mean, if you

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Speaker 2: have a sense of humor, you can kind of laugh

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Speaker 2: about it, because sex bomb is kind of like we

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Speaker 2: were haunted by terrorism and extremism for years, so it's

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Speaker 2: almost like trying to be like, what about the women?

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Speaker 2: You know, it was always about extremism and violence, but like,

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Speaker 2: isn't sex a bomb in our community? Sometimes? And I

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Speaker 2: think part of what in inspired me is the fact

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Speaker 2: that acting like it's not happening is not going to

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Speaker 2: make the problems go away. And I wanted women like

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Speaker 2: me to feel seen and represented, and I wanted them

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Speaker 2: to know that they're not on their own, because sometimes

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Speaker 2: if you have to hide like a relationship or something,

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Speaker 2: and something doesn't go well, like it can be really lonely,

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Speaker 2: and it can continue like a bad pattern or even

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Speaker 2: a vicious cycle. So I'm not even trying to say

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Speaker 2: that I'm a great role model, but if anything, like,

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Speaker 2: if people would give the book a chance, then it

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Speaker 2: would help them see that actually, you know, just learning

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Speaker 2: from some of my mistakes, and I felt representation was

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Speaker 2: so important because first of all, we've been represented so poorly,

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Speaker 2: if at all, by the media. And then I think

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Speaker 2: that we're very much perceived to be very one dimensional,

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Speaker 2: you know, like and sometimes on a spectrum either repressed

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Speaker 2: is something that gets thrown a lot around about muslum

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Speaker 2: women or sometimes in a strange way, fetishized. But actually

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Speaker 2: we're like everybody else in kind of a middle place

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Speaker 2: on the spectrum in that we have like feelings and

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Speaker 2: we'd like to have a relationship sometimes. And I think

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Speaker 2: what's complicated is that because we've never been able to

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Speaker 2: see I think I guess similarly with the black community,

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Speaker 2: where so long you weren't able to also see rounded

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Speaker 2: characters on screen and in media, that you'd have to

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Speaker 2: kind of just watch white women's example or figure things

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Speaker 2: out for yourself. And so if you don't know, like

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Speaker 2: missing women as you just described, You know, if they

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Speaker 2: do have quite a typical, traditional conservative upbringing and then

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Speaker 2: all of a sudden they're out of their normal they're

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Speaker 2: not living at home anymore and they want to kind

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Speaker 2: of meet people or they get feelings. They have to

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Speaker 2: figure it all out themselves, and it's really hard. And

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Speaker 2: so from that perspective, I'm hoping that the book will

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Speaker 2: be of comfort to people, although you know, I think

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Speaker 2: to others it will be challenging.

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Speaker 5: Thank you for writing that book right in putting it

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Speaker 5: out there, because there are so.

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Speaker 7: Many women who I know can relate to this.

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Speaker 5: And so when you think about your family and your

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Speaker 5: friends and just thinking about that, sobiity in general is

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Speaker 5: the uncomfortable talking about religion, really uncomfortable.

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Speaker 7: Talking about sex, and you talk about the intersection of

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Speaker 7: Oh right, are your family re branded to you put

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Speaker 7: it in putting this book out there.

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Speaker 2: So that's a good question. And well, my friends have

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Speaker 2: really welcomed it. They said that it's the portrayal is

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Speaker 2: very very honest, and they're proud of me, which is

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Speaker 2: really good. I haven't personally told my family was I

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Speaker 2: was just hoping that they might find out. It's not

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Speaker 2: because I am afraid of telling them, but I just

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Speaker 2: it's a very personal book and I do talk about

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Speaker 2: my family in there as well. So yeah, I haven't

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Speaker 2: really liked talk to them just because I think sometimes

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Speaker 2: comedy and also creative stuff is difficult.

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Speaker 3: For them to understand.

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Speaker 2: As Asian parents, they kind of really just want you

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Speaker 2: to kind of make money or which is this is

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Speaker 2: not that industry, let me tell you, but no, they

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Speaker 2: kind of a bit more, you know, do your simple

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Speaker 2: job and kind of thrive, and this is way more

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Speaker 2: of a hustle. So it's more protecting them from kind

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Speaker 2: of feeling like they have to worry about something that

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Speaker 2: they can't control.

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Speaker 3: All that is quite difficult to understand.

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Speaker 2: But yeah, I think my friends have loved it and

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Speaker 2: welcomed it, and yeah, it's a milestone.

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Speaker 3: I'm very fortunate.

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Speaker 6: Okay for that, Sadie, I want to ask you a

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Speaker 6: question and I am still work in progress, so I

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Speaker 6: hope this does not sound ignorant or silly, but you

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Speaker 6: are definitely multicultural, right. We talked about this a bit

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Speaker 6: in your intro. Can you talk a bit about where

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Speaker 6: you're from, like your background, just to get people additional

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Speaker 6: context if you're new to them. And then we have

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Speaker 6: another question about your identities and managing them.

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Speaker 2: That's a great question. Yes, So I'm British. I was

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Speaker 2: born in the UK, but I'm also Indian. So my

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Speaker 2: mom was also born in the UK, but my father's

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Speaker 2: Indian and so then he came to the UK basically,

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Speaker 2: and obviously I muslimb as well and comedian probably is

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Speaker 2: part of the multicultural Liso sowhare. But yeah, those are

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Speaker 2: the main things. I'm not a vegan, so you can

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Speaker 2: like me. I'm a nice person.

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Speaker 3: Oh my goodness, hilarious.

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Speaker 6: We okay, can you also tell folks what the significance

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Speaker 6: of today is. You're being interviewed on this podcast that

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Speaker 6: is based in America, and you share something with us

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Speaker 6: before we started.

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Speaker 3: I think it's super interesting.

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Speaker 6: So if you can tell folks about the significance of

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Speaker 6: today or this trip that you're taking, Oh.

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Speaker 3: My god, I'm so stupid. So I was so glad

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Speaker 3: I mentioned it at the beginning.

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Speaker 2: So listen, guys, this is my first trip to America,

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Speaker 2: and I talk about how hugely inspired I've been by

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Speaker 2: American comedians like you name them. They've struck a chord

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Speaker 2: with me, whether it's Bill Hicks, Sam Kinnison, Chappelle, Rock

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Speaker 2: Kat Williams. There's too many to mention. But because my

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Speaker 2: book is coming out in America twenty six or September,

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Speaker 2: I just thought, let me go. And it's my first

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Speaker 2: ever trip. So I'm sitting here recording from New York.

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Speaker 2: I've been here for a couple of weeks. I really

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Speaker 2: really love it and I could tell you a funny story.

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Speaker 2: I don't know if we'll stay in, but I was

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Speaker 2: really worried about like getting through the customs, like the

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Speaker 2: border patrol, because I heard a lot of stories at Bayma.

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Speaker 2: People were telling me that that you sometimes were detained

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Speaker 2: for a little bit. All that they were like really

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Speaker 2: really scrutinized. And then one person told me, and he

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Speaker 2: was white. He said, a white guy. They asked him

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Speaker 2: what you're doing here? And then they asked him again,

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Speaker 2: what are you doing here? And then they asked him

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00:19:55,640 --> 00:19:57,720
Speaker 2: a third time, what are you doing here? And then

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00:19:57,800 --> 00:19:59,800
Speaker 2: because he got a little bit frustrated. I don't know

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00:19:59,800 --> 00:20:01,879
Speaker 2: what he said a bit sarcastic the third time that

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00:20:02,000 --> 00:20:04,640
Speaker 2: I just told you, that's what he said, and they

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00:20:04,680 --> 00:20:07,960
Speaker 2: put him on a flight at So this is what

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00:20:08,040 --> 00:20:10,919
Speaker 2: the guy told me, and I was like, okay, if

383
00:20:10,920 --> 00:20:13,480
Speaker 2: that's what they need to a white guy, what it

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00:20:13,600 --> 00:20:17,760
Speaker 2: not happened to me. But so, after twelve hours of traveling,

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Speaker 2: I come into New York airport.

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Speaker 3: It's like I would never have imagined.

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Speaker 2: The guy basically was like, are you traveling on your

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Speaker 2: who are you traveling with? That? I was like, I'm

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00:20:25,720 --> 00:20:29,119
Speaker 2: on my own, unfortunately. And then he was just like

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Speaker 2: how long are you staying for? I was like a

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00:20:30,840 --> 00:20:33,120
Speaker 2: couple of months? And then he was like, oh, you're

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00:20:33,160 --> 00:20:35,879
Speaker 2: here for some dick. I was like, he didn't quite

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00:20:35,920 --> 00:20:38,720
Speaker 2: wordy like that, but I was. He Basically we had

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00:20:38,760 --> 00:20:41,119
Speaker 2: this New York moment where we just start laughing with

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00:20:41,240 --> 00:20:45,359
Speaker 2: one another because clearly he sent my desperation. And I

396
00:20:45,400 --> 00:20:47,400
Speaker 2: was not going to argue with the guy because from

397
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Speaker 2: what I'd heard before, they don't really like arguing or

398
00:20:51,000 --> 00:20:53,560
Speaker 2: chat back as I like to call it. So I

399
00:20:53,600 --> 00:20:56,119
Speaker 2: was just like, yes, sir, I want dick, sir. And

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00:20:56,119 --> 00:20:58,880
Speaker 2: then he was like, welcome to America. And I got

401
00:20:58,920 --> 00:21:03,240
Speaker 2: in and I was relieved because it was so smooth

402
00:21:03,920 --> 00:21:06,800
Speaker 2: and it was too like maybe not even two minutes

403
00:21:06,960 --> 00:21:09,400
Speaker 2: and so it felt like it was nice to feel

404
00:21:09,480 --> 00:21:12,800
Speaker 2: like I was kind of allowed in and accepted. If

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00:21:12,840 --> 00:21:15,360
Speaker 2: that's the word, I don't know, but it's a huge

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00:21:15,400 --> 00:21:18,600
Speaker 2: significance to be on your podcast today because you're American

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00:21:18,840 --> 00:21:21,440
Speaker 2: and you're lovely and the work we're doing. I feel

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00:21:21,440 --> 00:21:24,000
Speaker 2: like there's a big overlap in terms of the people

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Speaker 2: that we tried to reach and communities, and I guess

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00:21:27,320 --> 00:21:29,919
Speaker 2: there's a kind of an education piece around it in

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00:21:29,960 --> 00:21:30,760
Speaker 2: a subtle way.

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Speaker 3: So yeah, I love it.

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Speaker 2: I haven't had too many bad food but if you

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00:21:35,040 --> 00:21:37,399
Speaker 2: want to recommend anything, I'm open to it.

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Speaker 3: I'm trying to diet.

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Speaker 4: Oh.

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Speaker 6: I was going to say, okay that I may not

418
00:21:41,880 --> 00:21:43,879
Speaker 6: have a good recommendation based on the diet, but New

419
00:21:43,960 --> 00:21:46,040
Speaker 6: York pizza, I feel like it's classically.

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Speaker 3: I wore this because of the hard water. Is that true?

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00:21:49,800 --> 00:21:50,520
Speaker 3: I've never heard that.

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00:21:51,160 --> 00:21:53,720
Speaker 2: People are saying. I said, why, why why is the

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00:21:53,720 --> 00:21:55,919
Speaker 2: pizza so good? I said, because of the waters, And

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00:21:55,960 --> 00:21:58,800
Speaker 2: I was like, maybe they're lying.

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Speaker 3: I've heard everybody said that, So that's a great shout terry.

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Speaker 3: I'm going to try, as.

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Speaker 6: I was going to say, if you were traveling twelve

428
00:22:05,720 --> 00:22:08,359
Speaker 6: hours for a dick appointment. That is our hope. That

429
00:22:08,440 --> 00:22:09,960
Speaker 6: is one hell of a dick appointment. I just want

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Speaker 6: to say baseball.

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Speaker 3: Basically.

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Speaker 6: Okay, Now, speaking of dick appointments, we want to shift

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Speaker 6: up the energy of this episode a little bit. And

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Speaker 6: because we recognize, appreciate, and celebrate the multifaceted woman, and

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00:22:26,560 --> 00:22:29,520
Speaker 6: we here we believe it's okay to be bougie, classy

436
00:22:29,640 --> 00:22:32,520
Speaker 6: and ratchet. We believe that you can dance to strip

437
00:22:32,560 --> 00:22:35,480
Speaker 6: club music and still be classy. So, Sadia, we want

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00:22:35,480 --> 00:22:38,320
Speaker 6: to invite you to the oh you Blatchett segment.

439
00:22:38,480 --> 00:22:40,080
Speaker 3: Do you take on the challenge?

440
00:22:40,119 --> 00:22:40,600
Speaker 7: Of course?

441
00:22:40,720 --> 00:22:40,920
Speaker 5: Yes?

442
00:22:40,960 --> 00:22:44,159
Speaker 6: Please, yes, Okay, we got it. So what we're going

443
00:22:44,240 --> 00:22:46,600
Speaker 6: to do, Saudia, is we're going to ask you three questions.

444
00:22:46,800 --> 00:22:50,280
Speaker 6: We're going to share three sentence completions, and then we

445
00:22:50,359 --> 00:22:53,480
Speaker 6: have three photos pulled up, a few from social media,

446
00:22:53,960 --> 00:22:56,280
Speaker 6: and we're going to share one of those photos and

447
00:22:56,320 --> 00:22:58,600
Speaker 6: we want you to share with us some context about

448
00:22:58,600 --> 00:23:01,600
Speaker 6: the photo that we wouldn't know just looking at it. Okay,

449
00:23:01,960 --> 00:23:04,679
Speaker 6: I got Okay, let's do this. Let's do I'm going

450
00:23:04,680 --> 00:23:06,399
Speaker 6: to ease into it. So the first question for you

451
00:23:06,600 --> 00:23:09,840
Speaker 6: is what's the best piece of wisdom or advice you've

452
00:23:09,880 --> 00:23:10,760
Speaker 6: ever received.

453
00:23:11,920 --> 00:23:13,840
Speaker 3: Oh my god, it's a real good question.

454
00:23:13,960 --> 00:23:16,200
Speaker 2: I don't want to go on a cliche because normally

455
00:23:16,240 --> 00:23:19,680
Speaker 2: I say, one exec producer, you told me be you.

456
00:23:20,480 --> 00:23:22,960
Speaker 2: But I feel like that's a bit like commonplace in

457
00:23:23,000 --> 00:23:25,000
Speaker 2: the industry. So I want to come up with something

458
00:23:25,000 --> 00:23:27,840
Speaker 2: a little bit less. Yeah, something that's done the rounds

459
00:23:27,840 --> 00:23:30,000
Speaker 2: a little bit less. I think it will just be

460
00:23:30,040 --> 00:23:35,040
Speaker 2: something along those lines of like believing in yourself and like,

461
00:23:35,720 --> 00:23:38,680
Speaker 2: I guess you know what, I don't think we accept

462
00:23:38,880 --> 00:23:41,320
Speaker 2: losses very well. And I think it's because it was

463
00:23:41,400 --> 00:23:43,600
Speaker 2: something that we were never taught in school, were always

464
00:23:43,640 --> 00:23:44,240
Speaker 2: taught to win.

465
00:23:44,840 --> 00:23:46,120
Speaker 3: So I think something.

466
00:23:45,840 --> 00:23:49,679
Speaker 2: About yeah, just taking it l and you know, moving

467
00:23:49,720 --> 00:23:52,479
Speaker 2: on and kind of something good will come from the l.

468
00:23:52,720 --> 00:23:55,919
Speaker 2: Not that I'm trying to like promote failure for ethnic people,

469
00:23:56,000 --> 00:23:58,400
Speaker 2: because please don't take me the wrong way, but it's

470
00:23:58,480 --> 00:24:00,800
Speaker 2: just that it's a fact of life. And I think

471
00:24:00,840 --> 00:24:03,399
Speaker 2: that sometimes, you know, we can learn from it and

472
00:24:03,400 --> 00:24:05,560
Speaker 2: grow from it, and even there can be some good

473
00:24:05,600 --> 00:24:06,160
Speaker 2: from the bad.

474
00:24:07,320 --> 00:24:11,400
Speaker 5: Love that I love that there's always something that can

475
00:24:11,640 --> 00:24:16,359
Speaker 5: good that can come from the bad. Okay, now that

476
00:24:16,600 --> 00:24:22,160
Speaker 5: was wholesome, that was on our classic side. Now we're

477
00:24:22,160 --> 00:24:28,280
Speaker 5: gonna get into our racket size. Maybe maybe it depends

478
00:24:28,280 --> 00:24:31,399
Speaker 5: on maybe you might be classic, we'll speak.

479
00:24:32,119 --> 00:24:34,159
Speaker 3: It's unlikely. Okay.

480
00:24:34,359 --> 00:24:41,560
Speaker 7: So our question is will you work or two steps?

481
00:24:42,240 --> 00:24:46,640
Speaker 3: Would you say twork? Work or two steps?

482
00:24:45,320 --> 00:24:49,359
Speaker 2: Which if I'm honest with you, I'm gonna be real honest.

483
00:24:49,440 --> 00:24:51,879
Speaker 2: Yet my friends have not taught me, you know, two steps?

484
00:24:52,320 --> 00:24:55,840
Speaker 2: Not a great Does there have to be the twig ladies? Okay,

485
00:24:56,560 --> 00:25:00,720
Speaker 2: we are here for it. Yay, Yeah, doing my hip

486
00:25:00,760 --> 00:25:03,160
Speaker 2: thrust at the gym. I'm trying to get that ass.

487
00:25:03,200 --> 00:25:04,320
Speaker 2: You know, I'm trying.

488
00:25:04,960 --> 00:25:08,240
Speaker 5: Oh who aren't you here for it?

489
00:25:09,440 --> 00:25:11,359
Speaker 6: Doing in the gym to get that ass must be working.

490
00:25:11,440 --> 00:25:14,960
Speaker 6: You can't hear me now? Okay. I think the ass

491
00:25:15,080 --> 00:25:17,320
Speaker 6: was to mess up the technology because my camera went off,

492
00:25:17,320 --> 00:25:18,000
Speaker 6: the mic went off.

493
00:25:18,040 --> 00:25:19,720
Speaker 3: So you're doing a good job, stady. Keep it up

494
00:25:19,720 --> 00:25:23,280
Speaker 3: in the Thank you, You're welcome girl.

495
00:25:23,600 --> 00:25:27,159
Speaker 6: The next question for you is what's the sexiest item

496
00:25:27,400 --> 00:25:27,960
Speaker 6: you own?

497
00:25:29,720 --> 00:25:32,680
Speaker 2: Oh my god, okay, I did have these, like a

498
00:25:32,760 --> 00:25:34,160
Speaker 2: pair of fluffy shoes.

499
00:25:35,480 --> 00:25:35,919
Speaker 3: I had to.

500
00:25:36,280 --> 00:25:38,119
Speaker 2: I had one in red, and I had one in

501
00:25:38,160 --> 00:25:40,840
Speaker 2: like a soft pink, and you know it, it's just

502
00:25:40,920 --> 00:25:44,639
Speaker 2: too It's just you can't wear it out and they

503
00:25:44,720 --> 00:25:46,000
Speaker 2: haven't had a lot of action.

504
00:25:46,160 --> 00:25:47,320
Speaker 3: Guys, I really.

505
00:25:47,080 --> 00:25:49,439
Speaker 2: Need I mean, I did also have I don't know

506
00:25:49,440 --> 00:25:52,600
Speaker 2: how I lost this, but I did have a cuatchless

507
00:25:53,640 --> 00:25:56,520
Speaker 2: kind of a one piece. I had a cuatch less. Yeah,

508
00:25:56,600 --> 00:25:59,040
Speaker 2: I had a clutch less. Would you call it undergarment?

509
00:25:59,080 --> 00:26:01,000
Speaker 2: You could call it, so it's not a sick color.

510
00:26:01,600 --> 00:26:04,760
Speaker 2: It was black, it was like lacy, and it was

511
00:26:04,800 --> 00:26:06,840
Speaker 2: like a bodysuit, So cuatchless bodysuit.

512
00:26:07,000 --> 00:26:10,320
Speaker 3: Basically, I don't know how I lost that, guys. It

513
00:26:10,520 --> 00:26:14,280
Speaker 3: just I bought it and I didn't know. But I think, yeah,

514
00:26:14,400 --> 00:26:17,960
Speaker 3: sexy lingerise is good. I wouldn't really.

515
00:26:17,760 --> 00:26:20,000
Speaker 2: Feel earrings or anything like that sexy, but I think

516
00:26:20,080 --> 00:26:23,239
Speaker 2: sometimes they can make you feel sexy and kind of

517
00:26:23,280 --> 00:26:25,360
Speaker 2: help bring things up a gear.

518
00:26:26,560 --> 00:26:32,760
Speaker 5: Good answer, Yes, okay, okay, we think black, late and crack.

519
00:26:34,000 --> 00:26:36,720
Speaker 7: So now we're going to look to the sentence completion.

520
00:26:37,720 --> 00:26:40,120
Speaker 7: Our first sentence completion is.

521
00:26:41,040 --> 00:26:44,520
Speaker 5: One question or topic I wish people ask me about

522
00:26:44,560 --> 00:26:45,280
Speaker 5: more often.

523
00:26:45,680 --> 00:26:49,280
Speaker 3: Is ooh, that's a great question.

524
00:26:49,800 --> 00:26:54,000
Speaker 6: My breast well funny enough, you won't believe this. But

525
00:26:54,040 --> 00:26:57,000
Speaker 6: the next sentence completion is what I want to tell

526
00:26:57,040 --> 00:26:58,760
Speaker 6: people about my breast is.

527
00:27:00,160 --> 00:27:03,720
Speaker 2: My breaths are lovely. I don't know, stupid, but yeah,

528
00:27:03,840 --> 00:27:09,680
Speaker 2: my breaths are amazing down, very very nice breath. Amen,

529
00:27:09,840 --> 00:27:11,680
Speaker 2: I'm going to go to your Instagram. Now we're gonna

530
00:27:11,680 --> 00:27:14,280
Speaker 2: take a look at these breasts. Come on, girl, I

531
00:27:14,320 --> 00:27:14,639
Speaker 2: love that.

532
00:27:15,520 --> 00:27:15,760
Speaker 3: Women.

533
00:27:16,200 --> 00:27:18,480
Speaker 6: We should, yeah, we should feel ourselves like it's okay

534
00:27:18,520 --> 00:27:19,880
Speaker 6: to think, oh I've got a nice ass.

535
00:27:19,880 --> 00:27:24,280
Speaker 3: I got some nice breasts. I love that. Yes, I

536
00:27:25,080 --> 00:27:26,920
Speaker 3: asked at them a lot. You know what I mean.

537
00:27:27,080 --> 00:27:30,119
Speaker 3: Like people are not like, oh, those are some nice breasts.

538
00:27:31,240 --> 00:27:35,800
Speaker 3: No one, no one ever tell no one. All right,

539
00:27:36,040 --> 00:27:37,760
Speaker 3: we need people to say that more to you, Sadi.

540
00:27:38,000 --> 00:27:38,200
Speaker 6: Yeah.

541
00:27:39,320 --> 00:27:39,520
Speaker 5: Yeah.

542
00:27:39,560 --> 00:27:43,560
Speaker 6: This takes us to our last question, which the last

543
00:27:43,560 --> 00:27:44,560
Speaker 6: sentence completion.

544
00:27:44,920 --> 00:27:46,280
Speaker 3: You know I know the answer to this.

545
00:27:46,520 --> 00:27:50,720
Speaker 7: I think we will. I think we will. So the

546
00:27:50,840 --> 00:27:53,280
Speaker 7: last sentence completion.

547
00:27:53,080 --> 00:28:02,560
Speaker 5: Is what I love most about myself is thank you. Yes,

548
00:28:02,720 --> 00:28:05,240
Speaker 5: we were waiting for it.

549
00:28:04,280 --> 00:28:10,520
Speaker 6: Yes, my titties, I love it. Yes, come on titties, okay, Sadia.

550
00:28:10,720 --> 00:28:12,800
Speaker 6: So we want you to choose a number out of

551
00:28:12,840 --> 00:28:15,200
Speaker 6: one in three. I want you choose that number. We're

552
00:28:15,200 --> 00:28:18,520
Speaker 6: gonna reveal that particular photo on the big screen and

553
00:28:19,000 --> 00:28:20,880
Speaker 6: we'll have you give us some context about the photo

554
00:28:20,960 --> 00:28:22,520
Speaker 6: that we don't know just by looking at it.

555
00:28:22,560 --> 00:28:26,000
Speaker 3: So what is your number? Let's go for three, Let's

556
00:28:26,040 --> 00:28:27,479
Speaker 3: go further. All right?

557
00:28:27,600 --> 00:28:30,040
Speaker 6: All right, okay, so Sadia, we're gonna pull up the

558
00:28:30,400 --> 00:28:33,160
Speaker 6: pull up the picture here and if you could describe

559
00:28:33,160 --> 00:28:36,600
Speaker 6: the photo to the folks who are only tuning in

560
00:28:36,640 --> 00:28:38,920
Speaker 6: because some folks will not be watching, and then give

561
00:28:38,960 --> 00:28:39,760
Speaker 6: us some context.

562
00:28:39,960 --> 00:28:42,680
Speaker 3: All right, do you see the big picture? Ah? Yeah,

563
00:28:42,840 --> 00:28:46,720
Speaker 3: that's pretty okay. Cool. So I'm wearing there, i am.

564
00:28:46,960 --> 00:28:51,320
Speaker 2: I'm at the Audio Awards ceremony from a few years ago.

565
00:28:51,680 --> 00:28:54,080
Speaker 3: I'm wearing a very very nice.

566
00:28:53,880 --> 00:28:58,120
Speaker 2: Teal heads sorry head wrap that's tied up, and I'm posing.

567
00:28:58,240 --> 00:29:02,440
Speaker 2: It's a selfie with Trevor Nelson, who's like this amazing

568
00:29:02,760 --> 00:29:08,960
Speaker 2: iconic DJ kind of radio personality, host, TV personality, like

569
00:29:09,280 --> 00:29:14,240
Speaker 2: basically British British legend. And I've got some sexy Srofsky

570
00:29:14,360 --> 00:29:18,240
Speaker 2: earrings on. My makeup's been done so so professionally, not

571
00:29:18,360 --> 00:29:22,000
Speaker 2: by me, and yeah, I'm like, I'm living.

572
00:29:21,720 --> 00:29:23,840
Speaker 3: My best life in that picture. We're very happy.

573
00:29:23,880 --> 00:29:27,600
Speaker 2: I got a lot of compliments from all people, like women, men,

574
00:29:28,040 --> 00:29:30,440
Speaker 2: mostly women at that event, and it's nice when women

575
00:29:30,560 --> 00:29:33,760
Speaker 2: like appreciate each other. So I feel like that color

576
00:29:34,600 --> 00:29:36,640
Speaker 2: looked really good on me, but it was very glittery,

577
00:29:36,680 --> 00:29:38,840
Speaker 2: and like it just kind of all the glitter just

578
00:29:39,000 --> 00:29:39,720
Speaker 2: was everywhere.

579
00:29:41,080 --> 00:29:44,400
Speaker 6: It looks so beautiful. We'd love such a good phono

580
00:29:44,440 --> 00:29:47,520
Speaker 6: that you chose. Thank you for playing along with us, Sadire.

581
00:29:47,560 --> 00:29:49,320
Speaker 6: This was a fun segment. We're going to dive back

582
00:29:49,320 --> 00:29:51,200
Speaker 6: in some of these other questions that we have for you.

583
00:29:51,640 --> 00:29:51,920
Speaker 3: Sure.

584
00:29:53,040 --> 00:29:57,960
Speaker 6: Yeah, So you describe yourself as a comedian who love

585
00:29:58,040 --> 00:30:01,880
Speaker 6: sex and a hajab wearing wisdom woman. How do you

586
00:30:02,000 --> 00:30:06,000
Speaker 6: navigate the complexities of these identities and reconcile them in

587
00:30:06,040 --> 00:30:06,480
Speaker 6: your life.

588
00:30:07,600 --> 00:30:11,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean I feel like it's like you were

589
00:30:11,400 --> 00:30:13,600
Speaker 2: correct and you said you're a work in progress, and

590
00:30:13,640 --> 00:30:16,280
Speaker 2: I feel like so am I And I feel like

591
00:30:16,400 --> 00:30:19,840
Speaker 2: I've gotten quite comfortable in my own skin. And that's

592
00:30:20,080 --> 00:30:23,360
Speaker 2: what that's what to answer your question, that's what it's

593
00:30:23,360 --> 00:30:25,920
Speaker 2: all about. Like I think when I was younger, it

594
00:30:26,040 --> 00:30:28,880
Speaker 2: was about how to get the d it was about,

595
00:30:29,040 --> 00:30:32,440
Speaker 2: you know, external things. I feel like for so many

596
00:30:32,480 --> 00:30:35,640
Speaker 2: people like me, that self care and self love peace

597
00:30:35,800 --> 00:30:38,360
Speaker 2: wasn't always as strong as it could have been.

598
00:30:38,480 --> 00:30:40,520
Speaker 3: And it's so so important.

599
00:30:40,560 --> 00:30:43,960
Speaker 2: And I remember thinking as a youngster, what a weird

600
00:30:44,000 --> 00:30:46,560
Speaker 2: concept that it could be like loving yourself, Like, of

601
00:30:46,640 --> 00:30:49,560
Speaker 2: course I love myself, but there's it's layers to it.

602
00:30:49,760 --> 00:30:53,000
Speaker 2: And I think that's the way I navigated is in

603
00:30:53,120 --> 00:30:54,600
Speaker 2: like try to be nice to yourself.

604
00:30:54,640 --> 00:30:58,000
Speaker 3: You know, sometimes you're bad. You're bad, like your wild's sued.

605
00:30:58,120 --> 00:30:59,880
Speaker 2: You could say, make sure you want to do so

606
00:31:00,200 --> 00:31:03,320
Speaker 2: being and like as you get older and wiser, I

607
00:31:03,320 --> 00:31:05,080
Speaker 2: think to myself, you know, why am I doing that?

608
00:31:05,120 --> 00:31:07,280
Speaker 2: I can take a step back, I can slow down

609
00:31:07,280 --> 00:31:09,920
Speaker 2: a little bit, and you know, sometimes you know, you

610
00:31:09,960 --> 00:31:12,000
Speaker 2: don't need to be on self destruct all the time.

611
00:31:12,200 --> 00:31:14,480
Speaker 2: And so and that's the same to be said for

612
00:31:15,120 --> 00:31:18,480
Speaker 2: decisions where you know you might want a piece of action,

613
00:31:19,200 --> 00:31:21,800
Speaker 2: but is that guy really worth it? Is he checking

614
00:31:21,840 --> 00:31:24,360
Speaker 2: for you? Like you know, I just don't be putting

615
00:31:24,400 --> 00:31:26,840
Speaker 2: it out like that. So sometimes I can be frustrated,

616
00:31:26,880 --> 00:31:29,360
Speaker 2: as I said before, but like it can be funny

617
00:31:29,400 --> 00:31:33,040
Speaker 2: with comedy, and like it's definitely better to I mean,

618
00:31:33,040 --> 00:31:35,440
Speaker 2: I've had so many guys like reject me, which is

619
00:31:36,240 --> 00:31:38,440
Speaker 2: kind of a blessing in disguise because you're looking back

620
00:31:38,440 --> 00:31:41,000
Speaker 2: at that, like you know, it takes us time. Sometimes

621
00:31:41,040 --> 00:31:44,240
Speaker 2: there's women to kind of get over those els, as

622
00:31:44,280 --> 00:31:46,720
Speaker 2: I said earlier, or to kind of just move on,

623
00:31:46,960 --> 00:31:49,040
Speaker 2: and so they just saved me the trouble of moving

624
00:31:49,040 --> 00:31:51,440
Speaker 2: on from them, you know. So I feel like I'm

625
00:31:51,920 --> 00:31:54,800
Speaker 2: definitely my experience as a female is a miss him.

626
00:31:54,840 --> 00:31:57,520
Speaker 2: It's very different to a lot of conventional women because

627
00:31:57,560 --> 00:32:00,560
Speaker 2: conventional women, they get offered dick every day day, all

628
00:32:00,680 --> 00:32:01,120
Speaker 2: the time.

629
00:32:01,200 --> 00:32:04,680
Speaker 3: Did they did? And nobody is offering me any type

630
00:32:04,720 --> 00:32:05,040
Speaker 3: of dick.

631
00:32:05,440 --> 00:32:09,239
Speaker 2: So I'm like, I'm like real selective as well, and

632
00:32:09,280 --> 00:32:12,120
Speaker 2: I think it's real. It's a funny narrative to have

633
00:32:12,240 --> 00:32:14,600
Speaker 2: that I'm a woman who can't get dick, and so

634
00:32:14,640 --> 00:32:17,520
Speaker 2: I've utilized that in my whole message and things rather

635
00:32:17,560 --> 00:32:19,760
Speaker 2: than feeling stuff for myself crying on the sofa, not

636
00:32:19,800 --> 00:32:22,840
Speaker 2: that that doesn't happen now and again, but it's it's

637
00:32:22,920 --> 00:32:27,080
Speaker 2: hilarious because you know, it's just it's just silly, because

638
00:32:27,080 --> 00:32:29,200
Speaker 2: I think any woman can get dick if she really tried,

639
00:32:29,240 --> 00:32:31,760
Speaker 2: but like to to be so bad at it or

640
00:32:31,800 --> 00:32:35,360
Speaker 2: to be so unsuccessful is I find I find a

641
00:32:35,400 --> 00:32:38,160
Speaker 2: funny side of it, all right.

642
00:32:38,200 --> 00:32:40,920
Speaker 6: I want to share something personal and don't judge me.

643
00:32:41,520 --> 00:32:43,480
Speaker 6: I don't know if it's because of my last birthday

644
00:32:43,680 --> 00:32:46,320
Speaker 6: or because of how my hormones are set up after pregnancy,

645
00:32:46,720 --> 00:32:49,280
Speaker 6: but I sweat so much more than I used to,

646
00:32:49,560 --> 00:32:53,040
Speaker 6: and having a quality deodor it is extremely important to me.

647
00:32:53,360 --> 00:32:55,880
Speaker 6: I can't be walking around on these streets. Funky, let

648
00:32:55,880 --> 00:32:58,240
Speaker 6: me give you the inside. Scoop Dom has been using

649
00:32:58,320 --> 00:33:00,280
Speaker 6: Luney for some time, and when they reach sh out

650
00:33:00,320 --> 00:33:02,440
Speaker 6: to us to be a sponsor on the podcast, I

651
00:33:02,480 --> 00:33:04,440
Speaker 6: wanted to try it out for myself as well, because

652
00:33:04,440 --> 00:33:06,120
Speaker 6: Don loves it, someone to see if I would love it,

653
00:33:06,160 --> 00:33:08,480
Speaker 6: and guess what, I am obsessed.

654
00:33:09,160 --> 00:33:13,440
Speaker 8: Loomy was created by an obgyn who developed a uniquely

655
00:33:13,480 --> 00:33:19,040
Speaker 8: formulated pH balance deorderant. It's aluminum free, skin safe, and

656
00:33:19,120 --> 00:33:22,840
Speaker 8: clinically proven to control odor for up to seventy two hours.

657
00:33:23,480 --> 00:33:26,880
Speaker 8: Oh and did we mention that it's also clinically proven

658
00:33:26,920 --> 00:33:29,960
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659
00:33:30,400 --> 00:33:33,600
Speaker 8: Twelve hours after a shower, the average person has an

660
00:33:33,640 --> 00:33:37,560
Speaker 8: odor level of six out of ten. Oof with Loomi,

661
00:33:37,880 --> 00:33:40,760
Speaker 8: the average odor level is a zero out of ten.

662
00:33:41,120 --> 00:33:46,040
Speaker 8: I personally love the toasted coconut deorderant. I use that

663
00:33:46,120 --> 00:33:50,680
Speaker 8: on my underarms and it leaves me smelling so fresh.

664
00:33:51,000 --> 00:33:54,840
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665
00:33:54,840 --> 00:33:58,560
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666
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667
00:34:01,400 --> 00:34:04,720
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668
00:34:04,760 --> 00:34:08,280
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669
00:34:08,320 --> 00:34:11,799
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670
00:34:11,920 --> 00:34:15,799
Speaker 8: loomydeorderant dot com. That equates to over forty percent off

671
00:34:15,800 --> 00:34:19,759
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672
00:34:20,000 --> 00:34:22,080
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673
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Speaker 5: I can appreciate that, right, I can appreciate finding the

674
00:34:28,320 --> 00:34:34,640
Speaker 5: calamity in you know, what would be perceived as a.

675
00:34:34,680 --> 00:34:38,520
Speaker 7: Tragic or dramatic or a sad situation.

676
00:34:38,880 --> 00:34:46,960
Speaker 10: Right, Yes, there it really is, and you are finding

677
00:34:47,000 --> 00:34:48,919
Speaker 10: the good in the old l Right.

678
00:34:49,400 --> 00:34:50,840
Speaker 7: And so when you think.

679
00:34:50,640 --> 00:34:55,520
Speaker 5: About your experiences in terms of being able to get

680
00:34:55,520 --> 00:34:59,880
Speaker 5: big from wherever, right but having to be very discern

681
00:35:00,440 --> 00:35:02,839
Speaker 5: as I think all of those should be.

682
00:35:04,920 --> 00:35:08,040
Speaker 7: You talk about your experiences with.

683
00:35:08,239 --> 00:35:13,399
Speaker 5: Dating white and Asian men and saying that those experiences

684
00:35:13,480 --> 00:35:18,200
Speaker 5: have been unique. Son, can you share a couple of

685
00:35:18,840 --> 00:35:22,320
Speaker 5: insights or gym that you have learned.

686
00:35:21,960 --> 00:35:24,440
Speaker 7: That you've picked up from all the experiences.

687
00:35:25,280 --> 00:35:29,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean the main one that stands out is

688
00:35:29,040 --> 00:35:31,759
Speaker 2: is that you know, it sounds a bit simple where

689
00:35:31,760 --> 00:35:34,480
Speaker 2: it's like you don't have to try too hard as

690
00:35:34,480 --> 00:35:34,920
Speaker 2: a woman.

691
00:35:35,360 --> 00:35:37,080
Speaker 3: Definitely don't be desperate.

692
00:35:37,560 --> 00:35:41,359
Speaker 2: And it's hard because I've been there, and emotions are

693
00:35:41,440 --> 00:35:44,400
Speaker 2: real and they can get really like, you know, fiery,

694
00:35:44,680 --> 00:35:47,719
Speaker 2: and you know sometimes you can't sleep because you like

695
00:35:47,800 --> 00:35:50,600
Speaker 2: this guy so much. But that's what I really learned,

696
00:35:50,680 --> 00:35:53,319
Speaker 2: is that you know less is more and if a

697
00:35:53,400 --> 00:35:56,279
Speaker 2: guy's really worth it or into you, you can give

698
00:35:56,320 --> 00:36:00,359
Speaker 2: some feelers out, but he'll come to you. And from

699
00:36:00,400 --> 00:36:02,799
Speaker 2: the mistakes I made was trying to put everything on

700
00:36:02,840 --> 00:36:05,680
Speaker 2: the table, not only does it scare them because they're

701
00:36:05,680 --> 00:36:08,840
Speaker 2: so fragile, their egos are so fragile, they're so insecure,

702
00:36:08,920 --> 00:36:11,279
Speaker 2: and their digs are so small. Not only does it

703
00:36:11,320 --> 00:36:14,279
Speaker 2: scare them, but it's like it's not going to get

704
00:36:14,280 --> 00:36:16,120
Speaker 2: you what you want anyway. And then at the end

705
00:36:16,120 --> 00:36:18,799
Speaker 2: of the day, you still got to go learn to

706
00:36:18,840 --> 00:36:21,640
Speaker 2: love yourself, and you know you don't have to you

707
00:36:21,680 --> 00:36:24,160
Speaker 2: don't have to do things that make you feel bad

708
00:36:24,320 --> 00:36:27,120
Speaker 2: because you still have to undo all of that, like

709
00:36:27,160 --> 00:36:30,000
Speaker 2: you're left carrying the kind of choices that you make

710
00:36:30,160 --> 00:36:32,920
Speaker 2: and the way you treat yourself and others that we

711
00:36:33,000 --> 00:36:35,520
Speaker 2: still have to grow from that and move on from

712
00:36:35,520 --> 00:36:38,000
Speaker 2: it as well. And so and I don't drink as well,

713
00:36:38,040 --> 00:36:40,800
Speaker 2: So I don't even have the excuse of alcohol or drugs,

714
00:36:40,800 --> 00:36:42,520
Speaker 2: you know what I mean, Like I do everything I

715
00:36:42,680 --> 00:36:44,920
Speaker 2: do is in a cold light of day, right, so

716
00:36:45,800 --> 00:36:48,160
Speaker 2: you can't blame nothing on like Red Bull energy drink.

717
00:36:48,200 --> 00:36:49,160
Speaker 3: I don't even drink them.

718
00:36:49,560 --> 00:36:53,680
Speaker 2: So I really I realized that, you know, you can't

719
00:36:53,719 --> 00:36:56,360
Speaker 2: be trying so hard, Like if a guy is constantly

720
00:36:56,360 --> 00:36:58,440
Speaker 2: being a dickad, then maybe he just is a dickhead.

721
00:36:58,480 --> 00:37:00,680
Speaker 2: And why are you going to be rolling a dickhead?

722
00:37:00,840 --> 00:37:02,799
Speaker 2: Like I had a guy who was like, oh, i'll

723
00:37:02,840 --> 00:37:06,560
Speaker 2: meet you. He was two hours late, and it was

724
00:37:06,600 --> 00:37:09,920
Speaker 2: no real reason. And so it's like, you know, before

725
00:37:09,960 --> 00:37:12,680
Speaker 2: I might have been like, God, that's nothing. Now I'm

726
00:37:12,760 --> 00:37:17,640
Speaker 2: like two hours No, that's not going to happen. Okay,

727
00:37:17,760 --> 00:37:20,560
Speaker 2: you just preached the whole sermon. I felt the need

728
00:37:20,600 --> 00:37:23,040
Speaker 2: to also say this though, Sadia. So for listeners, as

729
00:37:23,080 --> 00:37:26,120
Speaker 2: you listen, lady and you hear Sadia say something funny.

730
00:37:26,080 --> 00:37:27,879
Speaker 6: Just know that Dom and I are muted and we're

731
00:37:27,920 --> 00:37:30,080
Speaker 6: cracking up on mute because we don't want to interrupt

732
00:37:30,080 --> 00:37:32,600
Speaker 6: the audio so she can see us laughing. But we're

733
00:37:32,600 --> 00:37:34,520
Speaker 6: over here, go over here, geek in, So just let

734
00:37:34,840 --> 00:37:37,520
Speaker 6: you out, Okay, So our next question, freak Sadia.

735
00:37:37,600 --> 00:37:41,040
Speaker 3: You mentioned feeling distance from your culture at times. How

736
00:37:41,040 --> 00:37:45,160
Speaker 3: do you balance your cultural heritage with your own personal

737
00:37:45,239 --> 00:37:47,720
Speaker 3: values and beliefs as you continue to evolve as a woman.

738
00:37:49,280 --> 00:37:52,759
Speaker 3: That's a great question and observation. And you know what

739
00:37:52,840 --> 00:37:53,240
Speaker 3: I think.

740
00:37:53,680 --> 00:37:55,799
Speaker 2: When I was younger, I was afraid, and I think

741
00:37:55,880 --> 00:37:58,440
Speaker 2: part of that was for my family, because I think

742
00:37:58,560 --> 00:38:01,160
Speaker 2: there was a pressure that if I was too traditional,

743
00:38:01,400 --> 00:38:03,680
Speaker 2: that I would have to follow the traditional route of

744
00:38:03,760 --> 00:38:07,840
Speaker 2: like having an arranged marriage or settling down. And because

745
00:38:07,840 --> 00:38:11,680
Speaker 2: I was I felt like more I felt like I identified

746
00:38:11,440 --> 00:38:14,560
Speaker 2: with strongly with a lot of the British values. That

747
00:38:15,480 --> 00:38:18,359
Speaker 2: felt scary to me because it wasn't like how I'm

748
00:38:18,400 --> 00:38:20,520
Speaker 2: going to just marry a stranger I've never met. And

749
00:38:20,560 --> 00:38:22,920
Speaker 2: at the same time, I felt like my British side

750
00:38:23,560 --> 00:38:26,880
Speaker 2: meant that I had to kind of almost choose and

751
00:38:26,920 --> 00:38:29,960
Speaker 2: I couldn't explore my Indian side as freely as I

752
00:38:30,000 --> 00:38:30,799
Speaker 2: would have wanted to.

753
00:38:31,480 --> 00:38:35,520
Speaker 3: People appreciated the exterior of my culture, but they didn't

754
00:38:35,560 --> 00:38:35,920
Speaker 3: want me.

755
00:38:35,920 --> 00:38:39,320
Speaker 2: To be too internally cultured because that would mean that

756
00:38:39,360 --> 00:38:42,760
Speaker 2: I'm not British enough. So I guess how I've reconcile

757
00:38:42,800 --> 00:38:44,759
Speaker 2: A lot of that is A, I can't make up

758
00:38:44,800 --> 00:38:47,120
Speaker 2: for lost time. You know, I made those choices and

759
00:38:47,160 --> 00:38:50,080
Speaker 2: I live with them. But B that fear is, you know,

760
00:38:50,560 --> 00:38:52,839
Speaker 2: didn't really help in those scenarios. So that I can

761
00:38:52,920 --> 00:38:56,080
Speaker 2: be as Asian as I want, as British as I want,

762
00:38:56,120 --> 00:38:58,600
Speaker 2: and I don't have to kind of justify that to anybody.

763
00:38:59,000 --> 00:39:02,279
Speaker 2: And that, you know, my faith has helped me a lot,

764
00:39:02,320 --> 00:39:04,520
Speaker 2: because that's one thing that I've never really had to

765
00:39:04,880 --> 00:39:07,760
Speaker 2: feel like I've had to kind of change for anybody

766
00:39:07,800 --> 00:39:11,200
Speaker 2: else's due to anybody else's pressure, And that kind of

767
00:39:11,200 --> 00:39:14,920
Speaker 2: helps keep me very grounded. So that's really important to

768
00:39:14,960 --> 00:39:18,759
Speaker 2: me and special. But yeah, I think we all go

769
00:39:18,840 --> 00:39:22,400
Speaker 2: through different things in life. Sometimes things will you know, Well,

770
00:39:22,480 --> 00:39:24,080
Speaker 2: I guess what I would say to a younger version

771
00:39:24,080 --> 00:39:26,640
Speaker 2: of me or listeners who this is relating to at

772
00:39:26,640 --> 00:39:30,080
Speaker 2: the moment, is to not be afraid of exploring your roots,

773
00:39:30,280 --> 00:39:33,480
Speaker 2: and even if that means that you're not understood, or

774
00:39:33,480 --> 00:39:35,960
Speaker 2: that it might make you feel a little unpopular with

775
00:39:36,040 --> 00:39:39,360
Speaker 2: certain crowds. It doesn't matter if they don't get it. Like,

776
00:39:39,600 --> 00:39:42,600
Speaker 2: try to be true to yourself and you know, why

777
00:39:42,600 --> 00:39:43,360
Speaker 2: are you afraid?

778
00:39:43,480 --> 00:39:44,880
Speaker 3: Like what is there to be afraid of?

779
00:39:44,960 --> 00:39:46,520
Speaker 2: Like, you know, you don't have to go and live

780
00:39:46,920 --> 00:39:49,480
Speaker 2: somewhere you don't want to, but you don't also have

781
00:39:49,560 --> 00:39:52,560
Speaker 2: to rule out understanding part of your heritage and where

782
00:39:52,560 --> 00:39:55,080
Speaker 2: you came from. And even though that doesn't look like

783
00:39:55,200 --> 00:39:58,640
Speaker 2: it's in your current surroundings, it doesn't take away the

784
00:39:58,680 --> 00:40:01,680
Speaker 2: fact that that is a of your You know, your

785
00:40:01,719 --> 00:40:03,120
Speaker 2: identity and who you are.

786
00:40:04,440 --> 00:40:11,360
Speaker 7: That is so important for folks to understand that exploring

787
00:40:11,480 --> 00:40:16,920
Speaker 7: who you are all fast from your identity and really

788
00:40:17,200 --> 00:40:22,760
Speaker 7: shape your longevity as a human existing on this earth right,

789
00:40:23,640 --> 00:40:29,480
Speaker 7: and but also recognizing with that there comes criticism, there

790
00:40:29,600 --> 00:40:35,080
Speaker 7: comes backlash. There's always going to be haters and naysayers

791
00:40:35,120 --> 00:40:40,640
Speaker 7: and people people always don't have an opinion, right, how

792
00:40:41,080 --> 00:40:48,120
Speaker 7: have you handled the criticism or any backlash that you've

793
00:40:48,200 --> 00:40:53,200
Speaker 7: experienced from being who you are and being outspoken and

794
00:40:53,280 --> 00:40:55,960
Speaker 7: unapologetic in who you are.

795
00:40:57,400 --> 00:41:00,560
Speaker 3: I feel like my kind of.

796
00:41:00,560 --> 00:41:02,080
Speaker 2: Reward for all of that is that I get to

797
00:41:02,160 --> 00:41:05,120
Speaker 2: sleep at night very well, Like I don't have to

798
00:41:05,520 --> 00:41:07,960
Speaker 2: try and be you know what I mean, Like I

799
00:41:08,000 --> 00:41:10,640
Speaker 2: don't have to I'm not trying to please somebody and

800
00:41:10,880 --> 00:41:15,080
Speaker 2: fake it or you know, I'm not pandering to somebody

801
00:41:15,120 --> 00:41:18,719
Speaker 2: who because ultimately we can't please anybody or everybody, So

802
00:41:19,200 --> 00:41:21,680
Speaker 2: you might try start pleasing one person and then they

803
00:41:21,719 --> 00:41:24,839
Speaker 2: tell you to jump higher, and so that's just going

804
00:41:24,920 --> 00:41:27,440
Speaker 2: to cause a lot of stress and upset, and I

805
00:41:27,480 --> 00:41:29,680
Speaker 2: think it detracts from what we're talking about, which is

806
00:41:29,800 --> 00:41:33,960
Speaker 2: reconciling yourself with who you are and your purpose and

807
00:41:34,000 --> 00:41:36,760
Speaker 2: your position and your identity and all of those things

808
00:41:36,760 --> 00:41:41,040
Speaker 2: come from within. So you know, sometimes people try and

809
00:41:41,400 --> 00:41:44,120
Speaker 2: vocalize it, and sometimes I think it's harder when they

810
00:41:44,200 --> 00:41:48,680
Speaker 2: don't vocalize the kind of problems because I think when

811
00:41:48,680 --> 00:41:52,080
Speaker 2: they do articulate that they've got an issue, you then

812
00:41:52,160 --> 00:41:54,359
Speaker 2: at least you know who the enemy is or enemy

813
00:41:54,440 --> 00:41:56,440
Speaker 2: might be too strong a word, but then you can

814
00:41:56,480 --> 00:41:59,440
Speaker 2: at least identify who the detractors are and then you

815
00:41:59,480 --> 00:42:03,280
Speaker 2: can kind of move accordingly. But when they move silently,

816
00:42:03,680 --> 00:42:06,560
Speaker 2: it's tricky, right, because there's a hater that you can't

817
00:42:06,600 --> 00:42:08,960
Speaker 2: even smell, so it doesn't matter.

818
00:42:09,120 --> 00:42:12,279
Speaker 3: I mean, I feel like it's just people because.

819
00:42:12,040 --> 00:42:15,560
Speaker 2: Of what I'm doing, and because it's like because of

820
00:42:15,600 --> 00:42:18,280
Speaker 2: the way that because of the context in which Muslim

821
00:42:18,280 --> 00:42:21,719
Speaker 2: women have already been kind of treated and represented, and

822
00:42:21,719 --> 00:42:23,759
Speaker 2: then because of what I'm doing, some people are going

823
00:42:23,840 --> 00:42:25,200
Speaker 2: to be here for it and some people are not

824
00:42:25,239 --> 00:42:25,920
Speaker 2: going to be here for it.

825
00:42:25,960 --> 00:42:28,759
Speaker 3: And that doesn't necessarily mean that.

826
00:42:29,000 --> 00:42:32,200
Speaker 2: You know, it's like black and white, because sometimes the

827
00:42:32,200 --> 00:42:35,040
Speaker 2: people who are here for it don't even fully understand it,

828
00:42:35,120 --> 00:42:36,800
Speaker 2: or might be here for it for the wrong reasons

829
00:42:36,840 --> 00:42:41,799
Speaker 2: because they think you validate the impression of somebody that

830
00:42:41,840 --> 00:42:44,720
Speaker 2: they want you to be anyway, So it's very complicated.

831
00:42:45,160 --> 00:42:47,960
Speaker 2: I feel like I'm not a fan of positive discrimination

832
00:42:48,160 --> 00:42:51,840
Speaker 2: or negative discrimination. They're both discrimination. I feel like, you know,

833
00:42:51,960 --> 00:42:56,399
Speaker 2: positive discrimination sounds pretty, but it's still ugly. So yeah,

834
00:42:56,520 --> 00:42:59,359
Speaker 2: I'm just I'm just here trying to do what I

835
00:42:59,360 --> 00:43:02,359
Speaker 2: can do, like to the best of my ability, and

836
00:43:02,440 --> 00:43:06,080
Speaker 2: hopefully people will understand it. They might not always have

837
00:43:06,239 --> 00:43:09,040
Speaker 2: been called thought provoking, which is fine, but like, as

838
00:43:09,040 --> 00:43:11,080
Speaker 2: a comedian, you just really want to be someone who

839
00:43:11,120 --> 00:43:14,160
Speaker 2: makes people laugh, and I think I don't really let

840
00:43:14,200 --> 00:43:14,719
Speaker 2: it get to me.

841
00:43:14,840 --> 00:43:15,640
Speaker 3: So my tip side.

842
00:43:15,640 --> 00:43:18,359
Speaker 2: I don't really engage with like social media comments, So

843
00:43:18,400 --> 00:43:20,080
Speaker 2: when people try and tell me that I'm going to

844
00:43:20,120 --> 00:43:22,120
Speaker 2: hell or something like that, I don't really want to

845
00:43:22,160 --> 00:43:25,239
Speaker 2: like engage with it. Or when people don't get you

846
00:43:25,280 --> 00:43:27,759
Speaker 2: on a very surface level, as we said before, like

847
00:43:27,800 --> 00:43:31,120
Speaker 2: I'm not hereingly to explain myself, like I'm learning all

848
00:43:31,120 --> 00:43:33,200
Speaker 2: the time, and I think there's a lot of strength

849
00:43:33,280 --> 00:43:35,640
Speaker 2: in being open to that and being a student, and

850
00:43:36,120 --> 00:43:39,520
Speaker 2: certainly self improvement is something that needs to come from within,

851
00:43:39,719 --> 00:43:42,879
Speaker 2: not because there's a again to jump on and that

852
00:43:43,000 --> 00:43:45,200
Speaker 2: you know or that there's something to be gained from it.

853
00:43:45,200 --> 00:43:47,640
Speaker 2: It should be more truthful and authentic.

854
00:43:47,719 --> 00:43:48,320
Speaker 3: I think.

855
00:43:50,120 --> 00:43:53,319
Speaker 6: That was so incredibly powerful and I hate to say it,

856
00:43:53,320 --> 00:43:54,520
Speaker 6: but it will start provoking.

857
00:43:54,600 --> 00:43:57,440
Speaker 2: Just what you made us laugh too, But you like

858
00:43:57,480 --> 00:44:00,239
Speaker 2: my titties right now joking, and you made us and

859
00:44:00,280 --> 00:44:01,000
Speaker 2: we like it to is.

860
00:44:02,840 --> 00:44:05,560
Speaker 6: I will say, so each of us, right, we've all

861
00:44:05,640 --> 00:44:08,520
Speaker 6: had to travel solo at some point in our journey, right,

862
00:44:08,920 --> 00:44:11,000
Speaker 6: And whether it's because we've had to let people go

863
00:44:11,120 --> 00:44:13,279
Speaker 6: because they just couldn't handle the journey or they didn't

864
00:44:13,280 --> 00:44:16,239
Speaker 6: see the vision, or we've had to shift perspectives that

865
00:44:16,480 --> 00:44:19,040
Speaker 6: no longer served us, and sometimes that journey can be lonely,

866
00:44:19,440 --> 00:44:22,080
Speaker 6: it can be uncomfortable. And you already listed some of

867
00:44:22,120 --> 00:44:24,760
Speaker 6: the benefits of walking alone, But what do you actually

868
00:44:24,800 --> 00:44:26,799
Speaker 6: do when you're walking along? Like I think about those

869
00:44:26,800 --> 00:44:29,960
Speaker 6: moments when you know people just don't agree with you.

870
00:44:30,000 --> 00:44:32,640
Speaker 6: And you mentioned that your faith is really important. You

871
00:44:32,719 --> 00:44:35,840
Speaker 6: mentioned like not engaging or explaining yourself to people, But

872
00:44:35,880 --> 00:44:36,839
Speaker 6: what else do you do?

873
00:44:37,200 --> 00:44:38,560
Speaker 3: Like I think about people talk.

874
00:44:38,360 --> 00:44:40,960
Speaker 6: About, oh, don't worry about the other people, don't worry

875
00:44:40,960 --> 00:44:43,400
Speaker 6: about the haters. But like when you're really you're like

876
00:44:43,480 --> 00:44:45,720
Speaker 6: on the journey, like you're by yourself, what is happening?

877
00:44:45,719 --> 00:44:47,640
Speaker 3: Like, what does it look like in action to be

878
00:44:47,719 --> 00:44:50,200
Speaker 3: by yourself on the journey? Does that make sense? Yeah?

879
00:44:50,239 --> 00:44:52,640
Speaker 2: And I think that I love that you're throwing to

880
00:44:53,200 --> 00:44:57,680
Speaker 2: that kind of being secluded to some extent or just

881
00:44:57,760 --> 00:45:01,439
Speaker 2: being by yourself, because that's okay. And sometimes we don't

882
00:45:01,440 --> 00:45:05,920
Speaker 2: always emphasize that there's a strength in yourself basically or

883
00:45:05,960 --> 00:45:09,440
Speaker 2: being by yourself a little bit sol being solitary is

884
00:45:09,440 --> 00:45:10,840
Speaker 2: the way I was looking for is so there's a

885
00:45:10,880 --> 00:45:14,399
Speaker 2: strength and power in being solitary. Today I was by

886
00:45:14,440 --> 00:45:16,919
Speaker 2: myself walking in the rain because New York wanted to rain.

887
00:45:17,280 --> 00:45:19,040
Speaker 2: But I think it's about having an umbrella.

888
00:45:19,080 --> 00:45:20,720
Speaker 3: I'm joking. I'm not trying to get silly.

889
00:45:20,960 --> 00:45:24,759
Speaker 2: I think, I think to answer the question, it will

890
00:45:24,800 --> 00:45:27,319
Speaker 2: be you know, sometimes the things that we don't want

891
00:45:27,320 --> 00:45:29,440
Speaker 2: to do other things that are good for us, Like

892
00:45:29,560 --> 00:45:33,880
Speaker 2: I like exercising that can help. That feaks to a

893
00:45:34,000 --> 00:45:37,120
Speaker 2: self improvement. And I think I think it's you do

894
00:45:37,239 --> 00:45:40,759
Speaker 2: have to do some kind of reflection as to you know,

895
00:45:40,840 --> 00:45:45,000
Speaker 2: your purpose or your direction and your circle. As you

896
00:45:45,080 --> 00:45:47,280
Speaker 2: said that there are some people that are on different

897
00:45:47,440 --> 00:45:50,080
Speaker 2: journey to you, And I don't know, let me just

898
00:45:50,080 --> 00:45:52,200
Speaker 2: be honest, Like you know, I had I had a

899
00:45:52,200 --> 00:45:54,480
Speaker 2: period of time where there's a lot of creatives in

900
00:45:54,520 --> 00:45:57,600
Speaker 2: my circle who are very who are white, who were

901
00:45:57,719 --> 00:46:00,360
Speaker 2: very important to me, and then all of us sudden

902
00:46:00,520 --> 00:46:04,399
Speaker 2: like something shifted and it felt like I don't think

903
00:46:04,400 --> 00:46:06,799
Speaker 2: that we were on the same wavelength anymore, and so

904
00:46:06,880 --> 00:46:09,000
Speaker 2: then they weren't really part of my circle. So I

905
00:46:09,040 --> 00:46:13,160
Speaker 2: think it's about accepting that it's okay to kind of grow,

906
00:46:13,800 --> 00:46:17,040
Speaker 2: and that growth it doesn't have to be terminal, Like

907
00:46:17,080 --> 00:46:19,520
Speaker 2: you know, they could always come back, you know, if

908
00:46:19,520 --> 00:46:22,480
Speaker 2: they wanted to or not. But I think it's about

909
00:46:22,640 --> 00:46:26,080
Speaker 2: kind of being higher and being higher.

910
00:46:26,000 --> 00:46:26,880
Speaker 3: Your higher self.

911
00:46:27,000 --> 00:46:29,720
Speaker 2: That's really important because I think in comedy we're often

912
00:46:29,840 --> 00:46:32,960
Speaker 2: joking on a kind of a lower moral kind of

913
00:46:33,040 --> 00:46:37,320
Speaker 2: you know ground, if you like, just honoring yourself and

914
00:46:37,480 --> 00:46:41,400
Speaker 2: having a good kind of relationship with yourself, and that involves,

915
00:46:41,400 --> 00:46:44,279
Speaker 2: like I said, doing the things that sometimes feel like

916
00:46:44,640 --> 00:46:47,120
Speaker 2: you don't really always want to do, like eating right.

917
00:46:47,880 --> 00:46:51,040
Speaker 2: Journaling can be really helpful, you know, doing the work

918
00:46:51,080 --> 00:46:53,520
Speaker 2: that you need to do that we're sometimes putting off,

919
00:46:54,040 --> 00:46:57,400
Speaker 2: so sticking to deadlines. Whatever good looks like for you,

920
00:46:57,480 --> 00:47:00,640
Speaker 2: Like that could be yoga for some people, or it

921
00:47:00,680 --> 00:47:04,439
Speaker 2: could be socializing because you're not kind of because you've

922
00:47:04,440 --> 00:47:07,880
Speaker 2: maybe had too much time by yourself, and so sometimes

923
00:47:07,880 --> 00:47:10,399
Speaker 2: it's like that sweet spot between being in and out

924
00:47:10,440 --> 00:47:12,680
Speaker 2: of your comfort zone. You know. We're often told in

925
00:47:12,760 --> 00:47:15,080
Speaker 2: creative industry that you know, push yourself out of your

926
00:47:15,080 --> 00:47:19,799
Speaker 2: comfort zone, and so that's great, but then also you know,

927
00:47:19,840 --> 00:47:20,440
Speaker 2: being kind to.

928
00:47:20,440 --> 00:47:21,680
Speaker 3: Yourself and rewarding yourself.

929
00:47:21,719 --> 00:47:23,959
Speaker 2: I think in a way that kind of like makes

930
00:47:24,000 --> 00:47:25,759
Speaker 2: it not so hardcore.

931
00:47:27,040 --> 00:47:30,839
Speaker 7: I love that. Thank you so much for answering that

932
00:47:30,960 --> 00:47:34,879
Speaker 7: question and getting some light on what what it really

933
00:47:34,920 --> 00:47:37,680
Speaker 7: looked like when you do have to go it alone, right,

934
00:47:38,480 --> 00:47:41,280
Speaker 7: And so one thing, because I know we're.

935
00:47:41,120 --> 00:47:45,200
Speaker 5: Getting close to our time, and this has been quite

936
00:47:45,200 --> 00:47:50,120
Speaker 5: an amazing interview and you have shared so many example

937
00:47:50,160 --> 00:47:57,000
Speaker 5: with our audience. I'm curious in terms of cultivating joy

938
00:47:57,520 --> 00:48:02,040
Speaker 5: in your life. You know, well, people automatically as throughn

939
00:48:02,080 --> 00:48:04,920
Speaker 5: that if you're a comedian or you're a creative that

940
00:48:06,239 --> 00:48:10,960
Speaker 5: you naturally just beat by being a comedian, there's joy.

941
00:48:11,080 --> 00:48:15,759
Speaker 11: Right, But that might not be the case. So what

942
00:48:16,000 --> 00:48:21,799
Speaker 11: do you do to cultivate joy in your life? I

943
00:48:21,840 --> 00:48:22,839
Speaker 11: think a lot.

944
00:48:22,960 --> 00:48:25,520
Speaker 2: I was really lucky post writing the book, Like you know,

945
00:48:25,560 --> 00:48:27,759
Speaker 2: it was an opportunity to look at the things from

946
00:48:27,760 --> 00:48:30,080
Speaker 2: a lens that I wasn't looking at at the time,

947
00:48:30,360 --> 00:48:36,200
Speaker 2: that went through experiences, et cetera. And you know, practicing gratitude,

948
00:48:36,239 --> 00:48:38,959
Speaker 2: which I'm sure your listeners are familiar with, has really

949
00:48:39,000 --> 00:48:41,960
Speaker 2: helped me because I mean it was a cliche growing up.

950
00:48:42,000 --> 00:48:43,800
Speaker 2: You know, you'd always get told that, you know, it

951
00:48:43,840 --> 00:48:45,719
Speaker 2: could be a lot worse, like my family would like

952
00:48:45,760 --> 00:48:47,759
Speaker 2: you could have had nothing like us, or you know

953
00:48:47,920 --> 00:48:48,480
Speaker 2: these things.

954
00:48:48,840 --> 00:48:51,239
Speaker 3: But I think when you're thankful.

955
00:48:51,080 --> 00:48:54,160
Speaker 2: It kind of just it's not there's no room for

956
00:48:54,280 --> 00:48:57,080
Speaker 2: anger or fear, and that's where anger and there is

957
00:48:57,120 --> 00:49:00,399
Speaker 2: where like the darkness can kind of like step from

958
00:49:00,800 --> 00:49:05,200
Speaker 2: or breed. So and it's a lovely point to jump

959
00:49:05,280 --> 00:49:08,320
Speaker 2: back off the previous question, which is, like, I guess

960
00:49:08,320 --> 00:49:11,360
Speaker 2: it's not feeling sorry for yourself, which is really hard

961
00:49:11,400 --> 00:49:14,840
Speaker 2: to do sometimes because you know, we can be emotional

962
00:49:15,000 --> 00:49:18,400
Speaker 2: or it can especially if like it's in the air,

963
00:49:18,640 --> 00:49:20,560
Speaker 2: Like I know that sounds weird, but sometimes it's just

964
00:49:20,760 --> 00:49:23,160
Speaker 2: your environment. It could be the damp weather or whatever.

965
00:49:23,640 --> 00:49:27,000
Speaker 2: And I think it's about picking yourself up when nobody

966
00:49:27,000 --> 00:49:28,960
Speaker 2: else is going to pick yourself up, because I remember

967
00:49:28,960 --> 00:49:31,120
Speaker 2: one guy said to me, they never put yourself so

968
00:49:31,280 --> 00:49:35,040
Speaker 2: down that you can't get up, because sometimes you want help,

969
00:49:35,120 --> 00:49:37,080
Speaker 2: but that help might not be around. We can't take

970
00:49:37,160 --> 00:49:39,640
Speaker 2: for granted that there'll be other assistants, like you know,

971
00:49:39,920 --> 00:49:43,279
Speaker 2: especially the journey that creatives are on, which is very

972
00:49:43,360 --> 00:49:44,160
Speaker 2: very kind of.

973
00:49:44,360 --> 00:49:45,680
Speaker 3: All over the place, if you like.

974
00:49:46,200 --> 00:49:50,080
Speaker 2: So, I think it's about being positive, you know, doing

975
00:49:50,120 --> 00:49:54,560
Speaker 2: your best and then like encouraging yourself. But definitely if

976
00:49:54,560 --> 00:49:57,440
Speaker 2: you feel like negativity is creeping in, like doing something

977
00:49:57,440 --> 00:50:00,960
Speaker 2: like acupuncture or at least like trying to break that cycle,

978
00:50:01,120 --> 00:50:03,520
Speaker 2: moving going for a walk or doing something so that

979
00:50:03,680 --> 00:50:08,120
Speaker 2: you're not kind of falling into like depressive states or habits,

980
00:50:08,239 --> 00:50:11,280
Speaker 2: because you know, on a one off it might be fleeting.

981
00:50:11,400 --> 00:50:13,680
Speaker 2: But what we don't want is a pattern to kind

982
00:50:13,719 --> 00:50:16,600
Speaker 2: of keep building and being kind of too big for

983
00:50:16,719 --> 00:50:19,360
Speaker 2: us to kind of then deal with and break down.

984
00:50:19,880 --> 00:50:23,680
Speaker 2: And so Joy, yes, Joy totally agree that you know,

985
00:50:23,800 --> 00:50:26,240
Speaker 2: a lot of there's a fine line between light and dark,

986
00:50:26,360 --> 00:50:31,160
Speaker 2: humor and sadness. And because we're always like evaluating things,

987
00:50:31,239 --> 00:50:34,440
Speaker 2: it can it can feel heavy. And so I think

988
00:50:34,480 --> 00:50:36,440
Speaker 2: when you're in that industry, it can be hard to

989
00:50:36,520 --> 00:50:41,120
Speaker 2: appreciate the things that you really enjoy because that's work

990
00:50:41,239 --> 00:50:43,799
Speaker 2: for you. So I love stand up comedy, but I

991
00:50:43,840 --> 00:50:46,320
Speaker 2: can't enjoy it the way I used to do because

992
00:50:46,320 --> 00:50:49,200
Speaker 2: I'm studying when i'm doing it. So I think it's

993
00:50:49,239 --> 00:50:54,280
Speaker 2: trying to find either alternative like maybe music or even

994
00:50:54,440 --> 00:50:57,120
Speaker 2: kind of like switching off so that I can enjoy it,

995
00:50:57,239 --> 00:51:00,000
Speaker 2: finding a way where it's not like work, like I'm sure,

996
00:51:00,120 --> 00:51:02,359
Speaker 2: or with you, like as a doctor as well.

997
00:51:02,600 --> 00:51:03,520
Speaker 3: You know, whether it's something.

998
00:51:03,360 --> 00:51:05,480
Speaker 2: You're reading you might just want to read for pleasure

999
00:51:05,560 --> 00:51:09,080
Speaker 2: as opposed to kind of just for you know, research

1000
00:51:09,400 --> 00:51:12,839
Speaker 2: or kind of educational purpose equally with podcasts, because you're

1001
00:51:12,880 --> 00:51:15,359
Speaker 2: a podcaster, you don't want to be studying it.

1002
00:51:15,480 --> 00:51:17,719
Speaker 3: You want to be you want to just enjoy what

1003
00:51:17,800 --> 00:51:18,520
Speaker 3: you're listening to.

1004
00:51:18,800 --> 00:51:21,200
Speaker 2: And so I guess I hate to use the word

1005
00:51:21,239 --> 00:51:24,120
Speaker 2: mindful because it's like such a bore, but yeah, just

1006
00:51:24,160 --> 00:51:26,920
Speaker 2: trying to be kind of reflective on the way that

1007
00:51:26,960 --> 00:51:30,919
Speaker 2: you're feeling at the time, and yeah, trying your best

1008
00:51:30,920 --> 00:51:33,479
Speaker 2: to be forgiving as well can definitely be helpful for joy,

1009
00:51:33,640 --> 00:51:35,360
Speaker 2: even though that's also really hard.

1010
00:51:35,480 --> 00:51:37,680
Speaker 3: But I think it's just learning to let things go.

1011
00:51:37,960 --> 00:51:40,040
Speaker 2: And I think that's again something I wish I had

1012
00:51:40,080 --> 00:51:42,840
Speaker 2: been taught younger or at school, that the power of

1013
00:51:42,920 --> 00:51:46,239
Speaker 2: letting go of the things that are hard to let

1014
00:51:46,280 --> 00:51:48,520
Speaker 2: go or the things that matter to us or that

1015
00:51:48,719 --> 00:51:51,239
Speaker 2: are kind of like lingering and finding a way to

1016
00:51:51,320 --> 00:51:52,239
Speaker 2: kind of move on.

1017
00:51:53,200 --> 00:51:56,240
Speaker 6: Sorry, this was so amazing. You draft so many gems.

1018
00:51:56,440 --> 00:51:59,480
Speaker 6: We appreciate you so much. Thank you for all that

1019
00:51:59,520 --> 00:52:01,480
Speaker 6: you're doing world. Thank you for your book, thank you

1020
00:52:01,520 --> 00:52:04,799
Speaker 6: for having these conversations and just honestly being who you are,

1021
00:52:04,880 --> 00:52:07,720
Speaker 6: because you just being you is already making an impact.

1022
00:52:07,760 --> 00:52:10,280
Speaker 6: So we would love for you to let our listeners

1023
00:52:10,320 --> 00:52:12,600
Speaker 6: know where they can find you, how they can support

1024
00:52:12,960 --> 00:52:14,520
Speaker 6: What next steps do you want to share with them?

1025
00:52:14,600 --> 00:52:16,320
Speaker 6: Is there anything else you want to share with us

1026
00:52:16,440 --> 00:52:18,040
Speaker 6: while we're here in this conversation?

1027
00:52:18,200 --> 00:52:21,280
Speaker 3: The mic is yours. Oh thank you so much.

1028
00:52:21,360 --> 00:52:25,600
Speaker 2: So I'm on Instagram at Sadia underscore Asmatt So that's

1029
00:52:25,600 --> 00:52:27,200
Speaker 2: what the es at the end, So I'd love you

1030
00:52:27,239 --> 00:52:31,400
Speaker 2: to follow me on there. Please also subscribe to Please

1031
00:52:31,400 --> 00:52:34,799
Speaker 2: also subscribe to Cultivating Her on all of your podcasts,

1032
00:52:34,800 --> 00:52:36,680
Speaker 2: because these girls are real.

1033
00:52:36,800 --> 00:52:37,400
Speaker 3: They're bringing the.

1034
00:52:37,440 --> 00:52:41,160
Speaker 2: Gems and then they're really meaningful and they're doing something

1035
00:52:41,160 --> 00:52:44,640
Speaker 2: in a very authentic, genuine way, which I feel is

1036
00:52:44,680 --> 00:52:48,160
Speaker 2: a blessing for everybody who comes across it. And on

1037
00:52:48,160 --> 00:52:51,480
Speaker 2: my website, I have a free guide which you can download,

1038
00:52:51,480 --> 00:52:54,160
Speaker 2: which then you can join my mailing list which is

1039
00:52:54,200 --> 00:52:56,560
Speaker 2: called ten Things you always wanted to know about the

1040
00:52:56,600 --> 00:52:59,440
Speaker 2: hijob but we're too afraid to ask. I would love

1041
00:52:59,480 --> 00:53:02,120
Speaker 2: you to all, so buy my book. It's called sex

1042
00:53:02,239 --> 00:53:05,160
Speaker 2: bomb if my memoir. It's very honest. It's had a

1043
00:53:05,200 --> 00:53:07,640
Speaker 2: lot of kind of nice feedback, and I think you

1044
00:53:07,680 --> 00:53:09,520
Speaker 2: all love it. Is the perspective that you don't hear

1045
00:53:09,600 --> 00:53:13,680
Speaker 2: a lot from a Misslim woman being quite revealing and

1046
00:53:13,960 --> 00:53:16,279
Speaker 2: kind of yeah, all of the things we've discussed today,

1047
00:53:16,360 --> 00:53:20,400
Speaker 2: being quite reflective, being quite open about my lessons in

1048
00:53:20,520 --> 00:53:23,440
Speaker 2: life and things that you can do kind of to

1049
00:53:24,320 --> 00:53:25,680
Speaker 2: avoid making mistakes.

1050
00:53:25,880 --> 00:53:28,680
Speaker 3: And the other thing is I'm still very single.

1051
00:53:28,880 --> 00:53:31,799
Speaker 2: So if there's any hot guys listening, we talked about

1052
00:53:31,840 --> 00:53:33,320
Speaker 2: the twelve hour Dick appointment.

1053
00:53:33,560 --> 00:53:36,800
Speaker 3: Man, come on now, come. I'm in New York right now,

1054
00:53:37,480 --> 00:53:38,399
Speaker 3: I can travel to.

1055
00:53:38,320 --> 00:53:41,440
Speaker 2: You for that twelve hour you know, like, so please

1056
00:53:41,640 --> 00:53:42,160
Speaker 2: like come.

1057
00:53:42,200 --> 00:53:43,360
Speaker 3: And these are some hot girls.

1058
00:53:43,640 --> 00:53:47,839
Speaker 2: They probably already have men, so stop looking for Dr

1059
00:53:47,880 --> 00:53:51,080
Speaker 2: Dom and Terry. These fine women are already spoken for.

1060
00:53:51,239 --> 00:53:52,240
Speaker 2: So I'm single.

1061
00:53:52,320 --> 00:53:56,520
Speaker 3: Guys. Shoe show shot. I love it. Sady Shoes show

1062
00:53:56,520 --> 00:53:57,160
Speaker 3: shot Shady.

1063
00:53:57,280 --> 00:53:59,560
Speaker 6: We're going to add the links for your book your

1064
00:53:59,560 --> 00:54:01,160
Speaker 6: website are thus in the show notes.

1065
00:54:01,480 --> 00:54:04,680
Speaker 2: Thank you so much, Thank you girls, Thank you for

1066
00:54:04,719 --> 00:54:05,920
Speaker 2: being amazing catching up.

1067
00:54:05,960 --> 00:54:08,759
Speaker 3: This is a lovely interview. Thank you, Thank you.

1068
00:54:09,520 --> 00:54:12,359
Speaker 4: Hey lady, it's doctor Dom here from the Cultivating her

1069
00:54:12,400 --> 00:54:16,399
Speaker 4: Space podcast. Are you currently a resident of the state

1070
00:54:16,440 --> 00:54:21,879
Speaker 4: of California and contemplating starting your therapy journey? Well, if so,

1071
00:54:22,680 --> 00:54:26,439
Speaker 4: please reach out to me at doctor Dominique Brusard dot

1072
00:54:26,480 --> 00:54:32,080
Speaker 4: com that's d r D O M I N I

1073
00:54:32,200 --> 00:54:36,680
Speaker 4: q U E B R O U S s r

1074
00:54:36,840 --> 00:54:41,960
Speaker 4: D dot com to schedule a free fifteen minute consultation.

1075
00:54:42,560 --> 00:54:46,960
Speaker 4: I look forward to hearing from you. Thanks for joining

1076
00:54:47,080 --> 00:54:51,920
Speaker 4: us today. Please note that our show may contain conversations

1077
00:54:52,000 --> 00:54:57,640
Speaker 4: about self help, advice, self empowerment, and mental health, but

1078
00:54:57,800 --> 00:55:00,600
Speaker 4: is by no means meant to be a sub for

1079
00:55:00,640 --> 00:55:04,960
Speaker 4: an ongoing formal relationship with a trained mental health provider.

1080
00:55:05,719 --> 00:55:08,480
Speaker 4: If you are someone you know is in need of

1081
00:55:08,520 --> 00:55:12,080
Speaker 4: mental health care, please visit a Therapy for Black Girls

1082
00:55:12,120 --> 00:55:17,280
Speaker 4: directory Psychology today or contact your insurance provider.

1083
00:55:17,560 --> 00:55:19,319
Speaker 6: If you liked what you heard and want to keep

1084
00:55:19,320 --> 00:55:23,760
Speaker 6: the conversation going, visit our website at Herspace podcast dot

1085
00:55:23,800 --> 00:55:26,400
Speaker 6: com and be sure to click the Patreon tab to

1086
00:55:26,400 --> 00:55:30,360
Speaker 6: get access to video content bonuses in our weekly after

1087
00:55:30,480 --> 00:55:34,799
Speaker 6: show and before we meet again, repeat after me, I

1088
00:55:34,840 --> 00:55:44,719
Speaker 6: am worthy of a happy life.