Speaker 1: Hi, God, I'm sick.
Speaker 2: I'm sick. I'm sick. I'm sick.
Speaker 3: Someone out me and you it's been sick as a dog,
Speaker 3: but my body and my body is different. Like I
Speaker 3: have the same things she's got right now, but like
Speaker 3: I'm not sick.
Speaker 2: No, it's because I'm out on the streets getting other
Speaker 2: people sick.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, and he's on her like super spreader shit,
Speaker 3: like she's been down with the super spreading vibes. Just kidding,
Speaker 3: just fucking kidding, JK.
Speaker 2: I have been seeing friends, I will say, I.
Speaker 3: Will spread it to me and Joe.
Speaker 2: All all of my friends who I've been seeing. Is
Speaker 2: because everybody's leaving for the holidays. But I tell them,
Speaker 2: I'm like, hey, I'm feeling a little funky congested. Congested
Speaker 2: congest it is how you say that, Oh that's a
Speaker 2: weird word. And they don't give a fuck because my
Speaker 2: ibe is so strong. They're like, honestly, it's worth getting
Speaker 2: sick hanging out with you. It's worth getting.
Speaker 4: Sick, you know what.
Speaker 5: A weird word to me is what I was gonna say.
Speaker 2: A weird word to me is like it's actually a
Speaker 2: said of words. It's drue as attractive, because I'm just like,
Speaker 2: that's not those words don't align.
Speaker 3: See mine is in your mine.
Speaker 2: But you know what words makes sense? Drew should kill himself.
Speaker 2: Those words together make sense. O, Drew, don't kill yourself.
Speaker 4: You're so sexy.
Speaker 2: You don't fuck with me. You don't start with me
Speaker 2: because I will go lower.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, that's true.
Speaker 3: Will add a gunshot, sound a post, and then add
Speaker 3: like holy music when I come in. So it's like
Speaker 3: I like in the Returning of Jesus Christ speaking of
Speaker 3: super Spider. You later, okay, period, period, okay, speaking of
Speaker 3: super spreading.
Speaker 5: So this morning, I'm like, why am I still so sick?
Speaker 3: Yeah, you're destroying your lungs. I don't do that shit anymore.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you're holy.
Speaker 3: Speaking of this morning, I was like kind of up early,
Speaker 3: kind of doing my thing. And every morning I just
Speaker 3: like do a little cleaning around the house, and I
Speaker 3: like had my eyes set on the bathroom, and the
Speaker 3: bathroom was particularly dirty, specifically the toilet. There's like, I
Speaker 3: guess we have hard water. I don't fucking know, but
Speaker 3: there's always like a ring in the toilet where the
Speaker 3: water sits.
Speaker 2: It's also from me doing my lipstick and then wiping
Speaker 2: my mouth and it being like covered in red oils
Speaker 2: and throwing it in.
Speaker 3: The toilet and AND's like fucking like, uh, throw it
Speaker 3: into the toilet and it just like melts off of
Speaker 3: the napkin and permeates the bowl and it's just crazy. Anyways,
Speaker 3: I was doing a little cleaning and I've never done this,
Speaker 3: so I don't know why I did this, but I
Speaker 3: cleaned the toilet bowl with this like bleach cleaner and
Speaker 3: what is that? What was that?
Speaker 4: Sorry, I don't know.
Speaker 3: Is that a sneeze?
Speaker 4: No, that was a laugh that I'm conges I'm sick too.
Speaker 4: Nobody asked me.
Speaker 3: How I'm sick of y'all ship, So can y'all shut
Speaker 3: the fuck up and let me finish my story? Please ask? Yes? No.
Speaker 3: So I was like cleaning the toilet bowl with bleach
Speaker 3: and I was doing my thing, and then I was like, oh,
Speaker 3: I'm going to use the toilet bowl cleaner on the countertop,
Speaker 3: and I sprayed the countertop with the bleach. And then
Speaker 3: I was like, well, I need to clean the mirror
Speaker 3: in there as well, and I grabbed the wind decks
Speaker 3: and I sprayed the wind decks on the thing and
Speaker 3: I overspray the fuck out of windows because I find
Speaker 3: when you add more wind decks it cleans better. And
Speaker 3: I guess wind decks dripped down into the bleach and
Speaker 3: I literally created mustard gas in the bathroom, and I
Speaker 3: swear to god, my throat started burning so fucking bad
Speaker 3: and my eyes started watering, and I was like, cool,
Speaker 3: I'm literally like I created I made a war crack
Speaker 3: in our bathroom. And I'm not talking about a ship
Speaker 3: like I literally like I created mustard gas.
Speaker 2: Our toothbrushes are out, so that means when you fucking
Speaker 2: spray that overhit, it literally gets all over our toothbrushes
Speaker 2: and toothpaste.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm disinfecting in it, so you should be happy.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but now I'm sick. So maybe you're creating mustern
Speaker 2: gas in my mustern mustern gas. Yeah, so bad mustard
Speaker 2: gas to Fortnite.
Speaker 3: That's like the ring rever. That's the storm.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I guess that is the storm storm.
Speaker 4: Storms those like little grenades, huh you know the little
Speaker 4: grenades was like the yellow gas.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, see that's the mustern gas.
Speaker 3: That's literally what our bathroom looked like this, And it's
Speaker 3: an invisible killer and you woke up later and was like,
Speaker 3: I she woke up kind of later, and I was
Speaker 3: like a few hours had passed since I created the
Speaker 3: mustard gas. And when she was walking in there, I
Speaker 3: was like, by the way, like, do not spend a
Speaker 3: lot of time in here, because I don't know if
Speaker 3: the mustard gas has left this space.
Speaker 2: I don't want you to die, like, I don't want
Speaker 2: to tell you what I did, but I did something
Speaker 2: in there, and I'm going to say it on the podcast.
Speaker 2: And I immediately knew because we have all those cleaning
Speaker 2: supplies sitting there in the bathroom, and I'm like, he
Speaker 2: literally comes in here and plays with them, Like he
Speaker 2: comes in here and plays with the cleaning supplies, and
Speaker 2: I know he's creating fucking gas in here because he
Speaker 2: just like is going overboard. But it's okay because I
Speaker 2: have a housewife in my life, so I can't complain.
Speaker 4: You guys have that one cleaning solution that looks like grape.
Speaker 2: Juice ibilo best ship. Have you ever smelled? Have you
Speaker 2: ever smelled fabulous?
Speaker 1: No?
Speaker 4: Is it good?
Speaker 2: Wait boy, do we have a surprise for you?
Speaker 3: I did fabulous? So slime, oh ge slime fabuloso slime.
Speaker 3: Thank you so much to the person that gave me
Speaker 3: this at the podcast.
Speaker 2: At the pop up. Oh, I'm not fabuloso too. So
Speaker 2: you can like have a reference to a house similar.
Speaker 4: That good.
Speaker 3: I put in you on.
Speaker 4: Like airport bathrooms.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I put in your onto this ship. Bro, Like
Speaker 3: she had no idea that ship existed me because I'm fabulous.
Speaker 4: Oh, oh ship, that's basically that one is a little
Speaker 4: bit better than the original.
Speaker 5: Fabulo.
Speaker 2: So please sponsor me the proper way to clean your floors.
Speaker 2: I don't believe in like the like mop ship.
Speaker 4: Oh my god, you can't get through the child protection.
Speaker 5: Oh it was so good.
Speaker 3: I drank it. Guys.
Speaker 2: I like, what was your joke?
Speaker 5: I said, never you said you put me onto this?
Speaker 3: Yeah, because and you said no, it's fabulous, Like who
Speaker 3: do you think put you on? Because I'm fabulous?
Speaker 2: Yeah I heard that.
Speaker 3: I heard that.
Speaker 5: I really want to ride a horse a horseriat.
Speaker 2: Cowboy finally went to a party, Like we finally got
Speaker 2: him out of the house and on the way home
Speaker 2: he like dead. Pam, Well, I don't know if you
Speaker 2: want to talk about this, but like who was hitting
Speaker 2: on Like the people who were hitting on you all night.
Speaker 3: Oh I don't want to say I want to keep
Speaker 3: it a mystery. But it was hilarious. Like the people
Speaker 3: that came up to me and actually, I don't give
Speaker 3: a fuck. Literally the hottest women I've ever seen, like
Speaker 3: bad bitches, fucking batty boots were like coming up to
Speaker 3: me and like kind of trying to like riz on
Speaker 3: me and like see what my vibe is. And I
Speaker 3: was like, damn, I've like created a monster. Like I've
Speaker 3: created a monster and I just get play. I get box.
Speaker 3: I'm back on box. I like sniff crotch, Like I like, shit, yeah, you.
Speaker 2: Were starting to wrap. You were like going bar for
Speaker 2: a bar. I'm back on box. I sniff on crotch.
Speaker 3: But yeah, it was just it was funny because he says,
Speaker 3: you don't got a chance with me. Yeah, because Drew's
Speaker 3: just like I'm the saddest I'm a same No. But
Speaker 3: it did, like it was a really big boost to
Speaker 3: my confidence. Like like everyone was like, oh my god,
Speaker 3: I dreakre out, Like, oh my god, like this, I
Speaker 3: know it's not.
Speaker 2: Good when like because Drew does not go out to parties.
Speaker 2: When he does, everybody treats it like it's such a
Speaker 2: like a thing. So the problem is then he will
Speaker 2: use that as leeway to stay the fuck home for
Speaker 2: the next like five months because you want to like
Speaker 2: keep it like this sacred medallion of like when you
Speaker 2: do go.
Speaker 3: I'm mysterious. I'm literally mysterious. Yeah.
Speaker 2: I did get comments like the next day, So who's
Speaker 2: that kid who can't keep eye contact and doesn't know
Speaker 2: what to say when I come up to him?
Speaker 4: Literally, when I came out to where you were sitting,
Speaker 4: you came out.
Speaker 3: What do you mean came out.
Speaker 4: Out of the but you came out at a party? No,
Speaker 4: well I did, but the oh in the famous section,
Speaker 4: in the famous section. When I went to the famous section, but.
Speaker 3: You came out.
Speaker 4: Yeah, he was sitting like on the corner of this
Speaker 4: like little wall, and there was a line of people
Speaker 4: like waiting like literally like the iPhone, and.
Speaker 3: I was like literally blessing them with my sword and
Speaker 3: knighting them.
Speaker 4: I was like, Yes, what was nice is when I
Speaker 4: walked up, I like passed the line.
Speaker 3: I just just like I come up.
Speaker 2: You had your your lanyard on lanyard with a picture
Speaker 2: of Drew like sexually in bed, like laying in.
Speaker 4: Bed, putting my hand with like the wrist thing for
Speaker 4: Coachella and the little light up path.
Speaker 6: He has like velvet ropes around him at this party,
Speaker 6: You're like.
Speaker 2: Holding it up through the crowded to any people.
Speaker 4: You're like, I have my I have my phone with
Speaker 4: the and in a water bottle, leg clocking that it's Kai,
Speaker 4: and I like keep looking away like he's not allowed
Speaker 4: in it.
Speaker 2: Wait, because you obviously stole that fucking pass because you
Speaker 2: would never make it on Drew's VIP list. You're not
Speaker 2: getting backstage? Was well, Drake and Kanye were trying to
Speaker 2: get backstage for Drew.
Speaker 3: But okay, if oh wait, actually, on a real note,
Speaker 3: I had a sex dream about Kanye on a real note,
Speaker 3: and I haven't written down like no, two nights ago,
Speaker 3: and I kept it from you because I wanted to
Speaker 3: talk about it. I had a sex dream about Kanye
Speaker 3: and we were in where where that fucking place he
Speaker 3: is right now? Saudi Arabia. We were there and it
Speaker 3: was crazy.
Speaker 6: Okay, so you had a sex dream with Kanye isn't
Speaker 6: Saudi Arabia.
Speaker 3: But I also had a dream about Taylor Swift non
Speaker 3: s dream, but I wrote down all my notes for
Speaker 3: it because it's quite literally the funniest thing dream I've
Speaker 3: ever dreamt. Okay, so the dream starts out and we're
Speaker 3: at a Beyonce concert. It's me, you. I forget who
Speaker 3: else was with us, but I know for a fact
Speaker 3: it was me and you and a third person. Oh,
Speaker 3: it was fucking Josiah. It was literally Josiah. It was
Speaker 3: me and josiaht a Beyonce concert. And this is like
Speaker 3: way deep in the future, and like, unfortunately, I'm not
Speaker 3: saying this has happened is going to happen, but Beyonce
Speaker 3: was washed and she couldn't even sell out an arena
Speaker 3: and she was doing an arena tour and there was
Speaker 3: empty seats everywhere, and it was really embarrassing. We were
Speaker 3: still wilding out, we were still turning up, but just
Speaker 3: Beyonce wasn't giving the Beyonce that we remembered, and it
Speaker 3: was sad. But then we got invited backstage and Taylor
Speaker 3: Swift was backstage because you know, they have that like
Speaker 3: cute little girlfriendship because of like people are trying to
Speaker 3: exactly exactly like that. One moment. I think it's at
Speaker 3: the VMA is when Beyonce called Taylor Swift back on
Speaker 3: stage when Beyonce won her award is one of the
Speaker 3: most iconic moments in pop history. But anyways, I.
Speaker 2: Mean that's like right under me and you starting the podcast.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, right under, right under, but we our backstage
Speaker 3: with Beyonce Taylor Swift. Taylor Swift is like, oh, you
Speaker 3: should come to my house, and we're like.
Speaker 5: What, Like, let's go to your house?
Speaker 3: Like, hey, we go to her house. She literally is
Speaker 3: staying in the White House, Like her house is in
Speaker 3: the White House, and she's under contract with the government.
Speaker 2: I did think of like big architecture.
Speaker 3: You're like, I don't know, it's literally the White House,
Speaker 3: like it's a government building and she's living in there,
Speaker 3: and she's under contract with the government to do meet
Speaker 3: and greets every single day at the White House. So
Speaker 3: she's meeting like fifteen to thirty people at the White
Speaker 3: House and we're just kind of chilling around like feeling
Speaker 3: like celebrities and we're like really cool, and everybody's like
Speaker 3: who is who are they with Taylor? Like what is this?
Speaker 3: And then after that, Taylor's like, let's let's go, let's go.
Speaker 3: I don't know where And we get out and go
Speaker 3: outside of the White House and we get on bird
Speaker 3: scooters and me, Her, me, you, Josiah and Taylor are
Speaker 3: riding bird scooters through like Washington, DC, and there's like
Speaker 3: a bunch of like special like security what are they
Speaker 3: called us?
Speaker 2: A special service?
Speaker 3: Yeah, secret service.
Speaker 2: Service, special service.
Speaker 3: Like clocking our tea, and like Taylor would like wave
Speaker 3: them off and shit. And then this is the gag.
Speaker 3: Taylor's like, oh, I'm gonna get my car and rashaw.
Speaker 3: She gets in the fucking golden Bugatti, the gold Bugatti
Speaker 3: from Yes, from the reputation Yes, and she speeds off
Speaker 3: and we never see her again. And then I wake up.
Speaker 3: That was my dream and I have it all written
Speaker 3: down in my notes, but I like remembered it all because.
Speaker 2: I was like, that is so fucking funny. In the dust,
Speaker 2: I've had a dream in a really long time.
Speaker 4: Have you been smoking weed? Because weed stops that?
Speaker 3: No, and weed stops covered.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2: So I'm because I'm sick. I'm like I'm really hoping.
Speaker 3: I don't did you spray something? Did someone spray something?
Speaker 2: No, that's I opened my tune box.
Speaker 3: Oh no, did you actually spray a perfume or something. Yeah,
Speaker 3: I sprayed this, oh, because my eyes are like burning,
Speaker 3: and I was like, oh God, the mustard gas is back,
Speaker 3: is back.
Speaker 2: But yeah, I guess it is from weed. So oh
Speaker 2: you got me? You got me?
Speaker 4: Are you doing dabs or you're just hitting the bubbler?
Speaker 2: What the fuck did you just say to me?
Speaker 3: I'm thinkidding.
Speaker 2: I think if I hit a bong, I would die,
Speaker 2: like even like because I like mind you as much
Speaker 2: as I'm like, oh yeah, I smoke now, it's like
Speaker 2: a baby amount. Like I literally still like I have
Speaker 2: like form, guys, I'm not addicted. I'm not addicted. I
Speaker 2: don't have a.
Speaker 3: Problem to stop it any times.
Speaker 2: It's still like such a low dose every time if
Speaker 2: I hit a bong, I actually think like I would
Speaker 2: like fall back, hit my head and like fall into
Speaker 2: a coma.
Speaker 3: Have I ever talked about when I hit a dab
Speaker 3: brig because I thought I was like being cool and
Speaker 3: I was like pta tonic all the way home and
Speaker 3: like my head was on the window of the truck
Speaker 3: and I was like and I like had no control
Speaker 3: over my body.
Speaker 4: So I was just like, I literally, oh yeah, I
Speaker 4: think I remember that story.
Speaker 2: I remember because I like every time he does the
Speaker 2: head thing, it like makes me cry because.
Speaker 3: It was like riding a school bus and you're like
Speaker 3: trying to be emotional, watching the rain drops rais and
Speaker 3: like your head is just high babing on the window
Speaker 3: and your nose is getting itchy.
Speaker 4: Did I tell you the story when I had like
Speaker 4: full blown schizophrenia from weed.
Speaker 2: No.
Speaker 4: I was in high school and I did this like, uh,
Speaker 4: this like backpacking trip with my friend. They didn't, Yes,
Speaker 4: I did. And I stayed in this hostel and I
Speaker 4: was like, I think I was like seventeen, and all
Speaker 4: the people in the hostel were like these cool what
Speaker 4: I thought were like cool college.
Speaker 2: Kids, but what are actually fucking freakingly who see seventeen
Speaker 2: year olds like.
Speaker 3: White white people with dread? That is the weirdest fuck.
Speaker 4: That's the weirdest. I think there were some white people
Speaker 4: with dreads, honestly, but so they're vikings bro so like
Speaker 4: they're all like, I'm with me and my friend and
Speaker 4: they're like, dude, come in, like we're all smoking the volcano.
Speaker 3: I've done those before and the same thing happened.
Speaker 4: Like this was the beginning of vape technology.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, it's like.
Speaker 4: This four thousand dollars device and it just like fills
Speaker 4: up a bag and it just it's like pure like
Speaker 4: clear air. Yeah, And so it was like my second
Speaker 4: time smoking high.
Speaker 3: I literally have a story just like this and I'll
Speaker 3: tell it after yours. But my brother like got me
Speaker 3: high Inston at the college off of a volcano, but
Speaker 3: his wasn't even a volcano. It was like the wooden
Speaker 3: box with the tube.
Speaker 4: That's ad the same era for sure. So I'm hitting
Speaker 4: this thing and I'm just like, oh, this is air,
Speaker 4: Like it doesn't even taste like weed. And then like
Speaker 4: after like five minutes, I'm just like I'm gonna leave,
Speaker 4: like I don't feel normal, like I don't know what
Speaker 4: this is home. And then I step out of like
Speaker 4: the room and I'm walking back to like like my cabin,
Speaker 4: and I just hear thousands of voices like telling me
Speaker 4: to enter the forest.
Speaker 3: And I was like the wicked forest.
Speaker 4: And I was so high that I was like, yeah,
Speaker 4: there's voices in the forest are asking me to come
Speaker 4: into the forest. They're probably just people playing pranks on me.
Speaker 4: So I was head, it's all these cool college kids
Speaker 4: playing pranks on me. So I got in bed and
Speaker 4: I just heard the voices and they whispered in my
Speaker 4: ears to sleep, and I was like, oh, they're just
Speaker 4: surrounding the cabin, like whispering around. And then the next
Speaker 4: morning I was like, no, like I experienced schizophrenia because
Speaker 4: I think I had probably the equival of like two
Speaker 4: bong rips.
Speaker 3: It was the evil witches in the forest.
Speaker 2: I literally have always been like I would never do
Speaker 2: a dab, I would never hit a bong because literally
Speaker 2: we have a friend who the first time I ever
Speaker 2: saw someone smoke weed was this friend would chronically get
Speaker 2: cross faded and throw up all the fucking time. And
Speaker 2: I didn't know that at the time, but it still
Speaker 2: scared me so much because like, I have such a
Speaker 2: big fear of like throwing up, even though now when
Speaker 2: I get really drunk, I just like let it rip
Speaker 2: really quick and he's whatever. But I like, if I'm
Speaker 2: like fully conscious, the idea of throwing up will literally
Speaker 2: send me into a fucking terror, like freaks me out.
Speaker 2: So I saw this person who was drunk go and
Speaker 2: hit a bong, and like he laughed for like two seconds,
Speaker 2: and then I saw his face go completely white and
Speaker 2: stare at all of us, and then he just projectile
Speaker 2: vomited everywhere. And I literally I felt like in a movie,
Speaker 2: Like they felt like I was in the Purge and
Speaker 2: I was the first person to walk out of my
Speaker 2: house and thank you, that was so jarring. I felt
Speaker 2: like the first I like can't even finish us. I
Speaker 2: did so like, but like I just felt like I'd
Speaker 2: witnessed something like terrifying. Like I feel like I watched
Speaker 2: somebody get stabbed and I just like shockingly backed up
Speaker 2: and like walked away. And now at any mention of
Speaker 2: a bong, that's all I could think of it. And
Speaker 2: it's such a vivid memory. Yeah, it's such a vivid
Speaker 2: memory in my head, Like I remember exactly what that
Speaker 2: garage looked like, like the way it was set up.
Speaker 2: There was like cabinets that you had to like get
Speaker 2: past to get to the sitting area. Like, yeah, now,
Speaker 2: the idea of hitting a bong, Like, I'm very convinced
Speaker 2: I would die, but I also am Yeah I would
Speaker 2: just die regardless.
Speaker 3: Yeah, gonna die soon, period, period. We're all gonna die soon.
Speaker 3: Natural gas leak our house, our house is going to
Speaker 3: explode in a ghastlin but I'm gonna finish the like
Speaker 3: Austin story. But anyways, like my brother was like like,
Speaker 3: let's like get high, and I was probably I was
Speaker 3: sixteen because I was driving, so I was definitely sixteen.
Speaker 3: And I drove down to Austin. He was staying in
Speaker 3: like a shitty dorm at ut and we like proceeded
Speaker 3: to get high and I was having like a good time.
Speaker 3: I was like, damn, maybe I can do we this
Speaker 3: is lip and then all of a sudden, Jared leaves
Speaker 3: and goes to like some house parties. So I'm there
Speaker 3: like all alone, and I didn't want to go because
Speaker 3: I was like kind of like teetering on the edge
Speaker 3: of sanity. And I was like, well, I'm going to
Speaker 3: just like stay here and vibe. And I was all alone,
Speaker 3: and I was alone with my thoughts, and I was
Speaker 3: like really like losing touch with reality. It was getting
Speaker 3: really spooky. And then I just hear on the door
Speaker 3: and he's like open the fucking door, open up, and
Speaker 3: I'm like, oh my god. It's like it's the police.
Speaker 3: It's the police, and I'm like, oh my god, I'm gone.
Speaker 3: I'm going to jail because there's a bunch of weed out,
Speaker 3: so I like run around and start cleaning up, and
Speaker 3: then I opened the door and it's my brother's like
Speaker 3: eighteen year old friend seven or probably nineteen year old friend,
Speaker 3: and he's like, dude, the police are coming, like they
Speaker 3: heard you smoked weed. They're coming, like you need you
Speaker 3: need to figure your shit out. And I start like
Speaker 3: literally sobbing and I'm shaking, and I'm like literally like
Speaker 3: oh cool, like I'm done for like the police are coming.
Speaker 3: And then my brother comes back and it's like the
Speaker 3: police are not coming. Just lay down and go to sleep,
Speaker 3: because he could tell I was like freaking the fuck out.
Speaker 3: And I laid there and I texted my mom and
Speaker 3: called my mom like all night because I was so scared.
Speaker 3: And I don't know if she knows that story or
Speaker 3: and I think she was aware that I was like blasted,
Speaker 3: zuited out of my mind and she was just being
Speaker 3: like a cool mom and like talking me through it,
Speaker 3: but like mm hmm. I was so scared. I was like, mom,
Speaker 3: like can you come get me? And Austin's like three.
Speaker 2: And a half hours over, no, but you can go
Speaker 2: to sleep, that's for free.
Speaker 3: I literally thought I.
Speaker 4: Was dying, but I thought there's gonna be some twists,
Speaker 4: like like I come and see wait, what does that come?
Speaker 2: Talk to me?
Speaker 4: No, no, talk to me? Yes. No. I thought it
Speaker 4: was gonna be like there was no one at the door.
Speaker 2: No, So you're the schizophrenic one. He's normal.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Period. Yeah.
Speaker 2: I like haven't had like a bad high or anything
Speaker 2: in a while, but I do have this thing that
Speaker 2: if I'm in public and I get high, I will
Speaker 2: freak the funk out, because we've talked about this like
Speaker 2: so many times. I will just analyze the what was that?
Speaker 2: What are you doing?
Speaker 5: What are you taking?
Speaker 2: Are you taking a picture on my foot? What are
Speaker 2: you doing? You're still doing it? Stop it?
Speaker 3: Oh my god, sorry for making you uncomfortable.
Speaker 2: I guess thanks for ad minute. Can you delete the picture?
Speaker 3: Oh no, don't take your feet out in front of me.
Speaker 2: You know this, I live here, we live together. My
Speaker 2: feet are Like, how many pictures of my feet do
Speaker 2: you have?
Speaker 3: I'll just say I don't have a folder with two
Speaker 3: thousand pictures of your feet if you just laying on
Speaker 3: the couch, So like maybe I just the three I
Speaker 3: just took.
Speaker 2: So you have two thousand and three photos of my feet?
Speaker 3: No, like probably more like nineteen fifty three or something
Speaker 3: like that.
Speaker 4: Do you have a dropbox dedicated to photos of Anu's
Speaker 4: feet because you and I upload them.
Speaker 2: Across the Oh, but they're okay. Actually, I don't think
Speaker 2: it's that weird because it's for inspiration, because your wiki
Speaker 2: feet is so low and mine is so high that you're.
Speaker 3: Just trying to bringing out my wiki feet, always bringing
Speaker 3: up wiki every time we get into a real argument,
Speaker 3: I'm like.
Speaker 5: Well, you have a fucking two on wiki feet, you bitch.
Speaker 3: Yeah, can y'all go boost my rating on wiki feet
Speaker 3: leaves because it really is like a hit to my ego?
Speaker 4: Well, I have the highest score on wiki hole, so.
Speaker 3: Yeah, because you have a weak hole, no grip, you
Speaker 3: got a wicked, nasty, scary hole.
Speaker 4: Yeah, then why would the score be high as fuck?
Speaker 2: Well, because wiki is like like worse.
Speaker 3: The higher it is in the rating, the lower quality
Speaker 3: it is.
Speaker 4: So it's not a gripper fuck Okay, bit it's lose.
Speaker 3: It's loose. You're los you're used washed up, your hole
Speaker 3: is washed up.
Speaker 2: Oh but at that party, I was digging in my
Speaker 2: purse before we left, trying to find my jewel. I know,
Speaker 2: everybody hates me. Oh, I fucking sape by whatever, like
Speaker 2: I'm a fucking freak whatever. I saw someone in the
Speaker 2: other who was like, damn, she's hitting that fucking flume
Speaker 2: flow and the jewel. We need to start abusing her.
Speaker 2: So she stopped.
Speaker 3: We need to save her.
Speaker 2: But I was digging in my purse like at this party,
Speaker 2: looking for my jewel, and I was talking to someone,
Speaker 2: so I didn't look down and I started like hitting
Speaker 2: it and I was like, oh, this must be a
Speaker 2: burnt ball. This tastes weird. And I was just hitting
Speaker 2: it and talking and then I was like, I like
Speaker 2: started over analyzing the person.
Speaker 5: I was like, who are you?
Speaker 2: I look down and I was like hitting my stizzy
Speaker 2: And then I did the same thing in the car.
Speaker 2: And I don't get like scared or anxious in the
Speaker 2: house high, but when I'm in public and I'm talking
Speaker 2: to people i'm not really close to, or actually even
Speaker 2: people i'm close to, I'm like, I know you. I
Speaker 2: know you better than you know yourself.
Speaker 3: That's literally like why I can't do we is I
Speaker 3: literally like I think I've talked about this like recently,
Speaker 3: but I psychoanalyzed people and I see them for the
Speaker 3: real them, Like I can break down all the walls
Speaker 3: they've built, and I can like break them down to
Speaker 3: like when they were like a child, and like it's
Speaker 3: really fucked up and like the things that went wrong
Speaker 3: in their childhood to make them act the way they
Speaker 3: do now.
Speaker 2: You have a psychedelic experience. Yes, that was literally me
Speaker 2: on my birthday last year when I like started solving
Speaker 2: because I was like, I love you guys so much.
Speaker 3: Well, what I almost say, I do think Parsley is
Speaker 3: the devil. I think we get we got mixed up,
Speaker 3: and we call we the devil. No, Parsley is the
Speaker 3: real devil. That shit is the most vile tasting ingredient ever.
Speaker 3: And when I see it on like my meal, like
Speaker 3: whether if it's on like my omu rice, like where
Speaker 3: the rice that you cut open, it goes on the
Speaker 3: egg you cut open, it goes on the ketchup rice.
Speaker 3: Like if I see it on there, I literally like
Speaker 3: the meal has twelve points knocked off of it. It's
Speaker 3: immediately a negative too, and they can only bring it
Speaker 3: back up with flavor. I cannot do Parsley. It's like
Speaker 3: when I take like a pressed juice shot and it
Speaker 3: has parsley oil in it. It actually feels like it's
Speaker 3: doing more damage than good, Like it's really dangerous. I
Speaker 3: don't it's actually dangerous.
Speaker 2: I know what parsley tastes like, Like I can't taste
Speaker 2: like fucking shita. It tastes like if you ate that
Speaker 2: the living room yesterday and you were like, have y'all
Speaker 2: ever really tasted salt?
Speaker 6: Yeah?
Speaker 3: No, I was thinking about so I have like salt,
Speaker 3: and I like was like gargling it because my sword
Speaker 3: my throat is a little soret and it's not from
Speaker 3: giving kai head. Don't even fucking ask my throat is
Speaker 3: like sore a little bit.
Speaker 4: Nobody was.
Speaker 3: I could hear them asking it in the comments. No,
Speaker 3: I was like gargling salt water and I was really
Speaker 3: tasting it for the first time and thinking about the flavor,
Speaker 3: and I'm like, damn, salt really is just like licking
Speaker 3: a rock, like it tastes like a mineral like it
Speaker 3: it's kind of gross and like it hurts a little bit.
Speaker 3: And I was just like, next time you eat salt,
Speaker 3: or dip your finger on some salt right now and
Speaker 3: lick it off your finger and taste it and think
Speaker 3: about the flavor. It's kind of gross, it's really nasty.
Speaker 3: Parsley is the devil though, like Parsley, Like, don't even
Speaker 3: get me started about Parsley. Like, if there's one thing
Speaker 3: I could do and one legacy I could leave on
Speaker 3: this planet, it's to eradicate Parsley from our diet.
Speaker 5: Damn.
Speaker 2: If you had the power to do something amazing, you
Speaker 2: would just get rid of Parsley. Because I wouldn't say that,
Speaker 2: Like I wouldn't do that.
Speaker 3: Yeah, No, Sis never means that's like my favorite, like
Speaker 3: my favorite genre of video right now is going up
Speaker 3: to b YU people and being like asking him like
Speaker 3: gay people or the Book of Mormon, and they're like,
Speaker 3: I'm sorry, but like this is easy. The Book of Mormon. Yeah,
Speaker 3: and they're like half a million dollars right now or
Speaker 3: five seconds with Gregory Saint James or whatever the fuck
Speaker 3: his name is from the Book of Mormon, and they're like,
Speaker 3: I'm gonna take the five seconds with the Book of Mormon.
Speaker 3: John Smith? Is it John Smith?
Speaker 2: No, it's John Snow. Oh okay, Yeah, Well I think
Speaker 2: I've said this on the podcast, but I was really
Speaker 2: thinking about it again the other day, having a kid
Speaker 2: who can kind of sing would piss me off, like
Speaker 2: like I never God forbid, my child is like in
Speaker 2: my back seat one day and just kind of like
Speaker 2: a like I don't know why they was singing that song.
Speaker 3: Like where did that come from?
Speaker 7: Oh?
Speaker 2: But it would piss me off and I would destroy
Speaker 2: that kid's dreams and I would tell them they can't
Speaker 2: sing so that they shut the fuck up.
Speaker 3: Yeah, because it happened to me once. Yeah, my parents.
Speaker 3: My dad told me I could sing good, and I
Speaker 3: didn't shut the fuck up for weeks. And my sister
Speaker 3: still makes fun of me for it, said this, Yeah,
Speaker 3: because like like still I was like six years old,
Speaker 3: and she'll be like, remember when dad told you you
Speaker 3: could sing good? And like you sang for two weeks
Speaker 3: in the car and he would like hype you up,
Speaker 3: and like then he was like, actually you're not. That's
Speaker 3: literally me. It'd be on the way to a baseball
Speaker 3: game that I didn't want to go to, and I'd
Speaker 3: be like singing along to like the ad Break and
Speaker 3: a Howard Stern episode, and like my dad would be like, nice.
Speaker 6: Oh, I literally my little sister like used to be
Speaker 6: told she could kind of sing, so she was that
Speaker 6: child and took it and I would just like get
Speaker 6: on her ass.
Speaker 2: I'd be like, listen, if you're gonna be a singer,
Speaker 2: you have to actually hone in and be good, because
Speaker 2: you do not. You gotta tap like you need me
Speaker 2: to my six year old sister. I have a dream
Speaker 2: to be on American Idol. I was like, you are
Speaker 2: not my idol.
Speaker 3: Everywhere have a dream to be on American I like
Speaker 3: everyone low Q is like, I want to do that.
Speaker 2: I want to be on the Voice because I want
Speaker 2: to hit that fucking button and my chairs will around
Speaker 2: like I want to do that, and like I want
Speaker 2: to do it for comedy and whoever makes me laugh
Speaker 2: just like smash.
Speaker 3: It and I want to go around. I want to
Speaker 3: know I.
Speaker 2: Can give nothing to them. And I'm like, you were
Speaker 2: just funny, dude.
Speaker 3: I want to go on American Idol or Americans Got
Speaker 3: Talent and go and go up to Simon Cowell and
Speaker 3: rip his fucking skin off of his body and reveal
Speaker 3: the real person he really is underneath that skin. Or
Speaker 3: take the medallion that's hanging on his chest that's keeping
Speaker 3: him kind of young, and just rip it off and
Speaker 3: watch him turn to dust in front of me because like,
Speaker 3: I swear bro he's a witch, Like he's a wicked
Speaker 3: I swear to god.
Speaker 4: I had those fantasies. It was one was s opting
Speaker 4: a school shooter.
Speaker 3: Oh class, school class.
Speaker 4: I feel like that's like a very like male fantasy.
Speaker 2: Why did I grow up in a school where that
Speaker 2: was ever a thought? Like I literally didn't go to
Speaker 2: a school where I was ever like something big is
Speaker 2: gonna happen.
Speaker 3: We had one or we we had like three months
Speaker 3: where people were like talking about like blowing up the
Speaker 3: school and it was it was. It was so funny
Speaker 3: because one of the main rumors was someone like wrote
Speaker 3: like you know, the like anonymous hacking group, Like someone
Speaker 3: wrote there saying on a wall in pencil, and like
Speaker 3: everyone lost their minds and was like they're planning a bombing.
Speaker 3: They're gonna blow this.
Speaker 4: School like white high school.
Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, like classic like white moms like overprotective, And
Speaker 3: no one went to school that day and then a
Speaker 3: few more times after that, people were like, he's going
Speaker 3: to bring a go and do school, like he's posting
Speaker 3: about it on Snapchat and he didn't.
Speaker 4: So there was a kid at my school that dressed
Speaker 4: in like World War one German nerd like war stuff,
Speaker 4: literally a nerds, and everyone was like, he's gonna do
Speaker 4: He's gonna do it, He's gonna do it.
Speaker 3: I remember the kid we all thought was going to
Speaker 3: do it, and I'm not going to say his name publicly,
Speaker 3: but like if you went to my high school, like
Speaker 3: you know who I'm talking about. And thank god, there
Speaker 3: was two kids and I actually ran into one of
Speaker 3: them and he was like in a He was at
Speaker 3: a restaurant and I like was like chopping it up
Speaker 3: with him, and I was like, damn, like you've like
Speaker 3: turned into like a cool person, like I want to
Speaker 3: hang out with you outside of this. But then he
Speaker 3: like vanished into thin air after that and I never
Speaker 3: saw him again.
Speaker 2: In front of you.
Speaker 3: Yeah, he makes YouTube videos now.
Speaker 2: Oh I don't know why this conversation just reminded me
Speaker 2: of this, But in high school there was this kid.
Speaker 2: There were two brothers. I think their names were like
Speaker 2: literally Christopher and like Jesus, and Christopher was like God
Speaker 2: bless him.
Speaker 3: Were as America. It's Jesus.
Speaker 2: Oh okay, okay, so Christopher and Jesus, so Jesus. You know,
Speaker 2: it's crazy. I don't remember if his name was his
Speaker 2: sus or we just started calling him this because of
Speaker 2: this story. So it was like these two white kids,
Speaker 2: like two of the only white kids in our school,
Speaker 2: and both of them had really long hair, but like
Speaker 2: the quiet brother would always cover his face like yes,
Speaker 2: and they were brothers, and he would always cover his
Speaker 2: face like with hair, and we like, I think they
Speaker 2: were like, what's the twins that aren't identical? Fraternal? They
Speaker 2: were like fraternal as fuck, and but we didn't know that.
Speaker 2: We just knew they were brothers and they were the
Speaker 2: same age. Whatever, bitch. The one brother who showed his
Speaker 2: face was mad fucking annoying, like God bless him. But
Speaker 2: like all of us were like you're funny, but you're
Speaker 2: fucking annoying, and you're like this is literally mean, but
Speaker 2: we were just like you're not that cute to be annoying,
Speaker 2: Like you're just fucking annoying, and like whatever.
Speaker 3: School was so judgmental about looks, like yeah, like.
Speaker 5: It's high school.
Speaker 2: It's like literally, if you're gonna be loud, you have
Speaker 2: to be cute, like you have to like, yeah, you
Speaker 2: have to be cute. And he but he was like
Speaker 2: a funny kid, so he was like we all knew
Speaker 2: him also because like the only two white brothers with
Speaker 2: long ass hair, we were like, you might as well
Speaker 2: be Justin Bieber, like that's crazy. Like actually, every like
Speaker 2: there was one other white kid and by like elementary
Speaker 2: school who had like long hair, and everybody called him
Speaker 2: Justin Bieber because like that was the thing. Like literally
Speaker 2: I got called Miley Cyrus and this kid got called
Speaker 2: Justin Bieber because those are the two like most famous
Speaker 2: white people to us like when we were growing up.
Speaker 2: But whatever, in high school, like I don't remember how
Speaker 2: this happened, but like the quiet brother, I was like
Speaker 2: talking to him and I was like, are you ever
Speaker 2: gonna like get your hair out of your face? Because
Speaker 2: like literally none of us knew what he looked like
Speaker 2: because he always had his hair on his face. I'm
Speaker 2: not kidding. One day, all of us got around and
Speaker 2: convinced him to move his hair, and he was the
Speaker 2: most gorgeous ever, and all us, like the brother must
Speaker 2: have like actually wanted to kill himself. And I think
Speaker 2: about this because all of us were like, bruh, you
Speaker 2: should be the one covering your fucking dad. And we
Speaker 2: all like turning and we were like, dude, you cover
Speaker 2: your face, you show your face, switch spots, no more
Speaker 2: of this. Like we were all like and we were like,
Speaker 2: you're literally Jesus, You're so gorgeous, Like we are literally
Speaker 2: like we were just like praising the fuck out of
Speaker 2: him because it was like the big reveal that he
Speaker 2: was like under like his hair and being the most
Speaker 2: quiet person ever was like genuinely gorgeous. And it's like
Speaker 2: that you started calling him Jesus.
Speaker 3: It's literally that trope of like hot or like nerdy
Speaker 3: girl with glasses pulls her hair down and takes her
Speaker 3: glasses up and walks down the stairs and.
Speaker 5: They're like, oh my god.
Speaker 2: But yeah, so we start calling him Jesus because that's
Speaker 2: the third most famous white person, you know.
Speaker 3: That's everyone calls me Jesus.
Speaker 8: Ironically enough, ironically enough, ironically enough, you know what they
Speaker 8: call me.
Speaker 3: They call you buttthole in tuna box.
Speaker 2: No, they actually don't call me anything. I was really
Speaker 2: annoying in high school though, as far as.
Speaker 3: We talk about, oh, this fact is gonna blow y'all's
Speaker 3: fucking minds, I'm not even kidding like it. It literally
Speaker 3: rocked my fucking world, m you have to take a
Speaker 3: real quick No, it's the fact is that your tuna
Speaker 3: box fucking reeks, bitch. No, it's we knew that there
Speaker 3: are more trees on Earth than stars in the Milky
Speaker 3: Way tenfold, which is fucking razy. Yes, there's a hundred
Speaker 3: tri I have the note one hundred billion trees on Earth,
Speaker 3: which I'm like, girl, if that's if we have that
Speaker 3: many trees, keep cutting them down, Like what the fuck?
Speaker 3: Like we got too many trees?
Speaker 2: Is it? Like, are people like on the sustainability train,
Speaker 2: like canti real trees for Christmas? Because I fucking hate
Speaker 2: plastic trees. I fucking hate.
Speaker 3: Plastic A fake tree then yeah, one.
Speaker 2: Hundred percent, Like I'm sorry, like traditionous tradition. My family
Speaker 2: has always used real trees. I'm never getting a plastic tree.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but there's one hundred billion stars in the Milky
Speaker 3: Way and there's an estimate of three point zero four
Speaker 3: trillion trees on Earth. Wow, which I'm like gag, Like, Okay,
Speaker 3: I'm gonna get in the tree business and cut all
Speaker 3: them bitches down like the lora axe like that shit
Speaker 3: sounds like it's a business.
Speaker 4: Shout out to the guy who's counting all the trees?
Speaker 3: Shout out to them, people, people.
Speaker 2: Is that like an estimate estimate? Nobody knows.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's an element imagery vibes.
Speaker 2: Hey I can count them.
Speaker 3: Yeah, well, guys, I'm like super proud of the tree
Speaker 3: this year. Will insert a picture. Granted it doesn't have
Speaker 3: the ornaments yet, like, he's no, it's gaggyana grande, like
Speaker 3: it looks great, Like, let me fucking live. It looks great.
Speaker 2: It was like, damn, do you want to get up
Speaker 2: and take a picture with it?
Speaker 3: And I was like yeah, actually yeah.
Speaker 2: She literally went to stand up because she thought you
Speaker 2: were serious. She's like, are you gonna do it now?
Speaker 3: I was like, yeah, no, you're right, Like we do
Speaker 3: need a picture next to it, But I'm obsessed with
Speaker 3: the tree. I never like made a pretty tree this
Speaker 3: pretty before, and it looks this good without fucking ornaments.
Speaker 3: But we're gonna have to take it down?
Speaker 2: Why because what did is all do?
Speaker 3: He's trying to eat all the plastics.
Speaker 2: Oh that's why I put it on the stool because
Speaker 2: he was eating all the fucking tinsel yesterday.
Speaker 3: And it's pissing me off. Oh my god, he's pissed.
Speaker 2: You could just get like get rid of it on
Speaker 2: the bottom a little bit. But yeah, he like saw
Speaker 2: literally like a moth to a flame, like he saw
Speaker 2: something shiny and whent and started like I just started
Speaker 2: like like that sound.
Speaker 5: I was like, what the fuck is that?
Speaker 2: And I was like, what is that sound? And I
Speaker 2: look over and he was like doing the thing cats
Speaker 2: do when they're eating something that they literally can't eat
Speaker 2: and they're like trying to get it under their teeth,
Speaker 2: Like do you know what I'm talking about? Yeah, And
Speaker 2: like he was like I saw his head like jerking,
Speaker 2: and I was like, what the fuck is he doing?
Speaker 2: And he had like a bunch of it in his
Speaker 2: mouth and I was like scripped it out of his mouth.
Speaker 2: And then he kept coming into the room and like
Speaker 2: looking at me and like looking at Nat and like
Speaker 2: Carl and being like and like literally like kind of
Speaker 2: standing around the tree and like looking at it and
Speaker 2: then looking back at us. Like he was so sentient
Speaker 2: in that moment because he was like, I know she's.
Speaker 5: Gonna take it away from me.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And then we lifted it and he came back
Speaker 2: in and he like looked up and he like kind
Speaker 2: of perched on the little stool and then he like
Speaker 2: backed up because he's like, Okay, they're like obviously take
Speaker 2: like they're moving it away from me. So I need
Speaker 2: to like I need to find the moments when no
Speaker 2: one is in here.
Speaker 3: So I can do Then he literally.
Speaker 2: Remember when I when I first got him, that was
Speaker 2: like our first year that we got a tree and
Speaker 2: he would hide behind the tree all the time.
Speaker 3: And then we were terrified that trees were like poisonous.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I thought everything was poisonous to as well. Now
Speaker 2: I'm like, bruh, if you were on the street, you'd
Speaker 2: be eating fucking you'd be eating leftover ketamine from somebody
Speaker 2: who like dropped it and was like drunk on the street,
Speaker 2: Like you can live, you will live.
Speaker 3: You're gonna live. Okay. Last thing I want to talk
Speaker 3: about is the charged lemonade from Panera Bread. Uh have
Speaker 3: you been hearing about? It's literally like the most deadly
Speaker 3: drink of all time.
Speaker 5: It's like they do take it off the menu.
Speaker 2: After that.
Speaker 3: No, some another old man died really yes, like recently,
Speaker 3: and they were.
Speaker 2: Standing there fucking ground with that.
Speaker 3: Shit, and I'm like, get that ship off the show.
Speaker 4: Why are they dying. It's just too much flavor.
Speaker 2: It's like four hundred and something like four hundred and
Speaker 2: eighty milligrams of caffeine, and and it's just.
Speaker 3: Like chilling out. So people will chug it and then
Speaker 3: be like, well that was good, I'm going to get
Speaker 3: another and not realize that they're having eighteen cups of
Speaker 3: coffee in one sitting while they're eating with their meal
Speaker 3: and they just od on caffeine.
Speaker 2: When I first moved to La, like I did, I
Speaker 2: like started to get really bad heart palpitations. I was like,
Speaker 2: what is happening? And then I realized that I remember
Speaker 2: when I used to drink the.
Speaker 3: Yerbamat Yerbamante's red Bull and coffee all and yeah.
Speaker 2: I used to literally like wake up, have a coffee,
Speaker 2: have a Yerbamant, get another coffee, have a red Bull,
Speaker 2: have another year of Mamte. And then before I went
Speaker 2: to see I was like, I'm gonna have a little
Speaker 2: coffee like it's like nice.
Speaker 5: It was fucked up and it was awesome.
Speaker 4: Is that what that is? Where like your heart will
Speaker 4: move in your throat for a second almost.
Speaker 2: Like it almost it literally almost feels like you're having
Speaker 2: a heart attack like like like iseezing.
Speaker 3: It's so scary, but they're literally like fairly normal like.
Speaker 4: That, and the prostate shooting prostate color me.
Speaker 2: Like in a bunch of friends in New York were
Speaker 2: sitting on the curve and one of our hopies was
Speaker 2: like eating a burger and it happened to him, and
Speaker 2: like he let out a yelp that I still remember
Speaker 2: so vividly because he was eating it.
Speaker 8: Like it's really like that like.
Speaker 2: A moone scream, and we all were like WHOA so
Speaker 2: embarrassed and he like was choking on his burger.
Speaker 4: So you like that can't be normal.
Speaker 3: It apparently just happens to everybody, because it's like it
Speaker 3: happens to me all the time.
Speaker 4: Just realized recently that women go through that too, and
Speaker 4: I was like, fuck, like you guys have to go
Speaker 4: through that PAM period and dude and fucking birth.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and like misogyny and boobs.
Speaker 4: I didn't even think about massogyny and.
Speaker 3: Boobs, like like boobs that are too big so.
Speaker 5: They like hurt your back.
Speaker 3: Yeah, literally, I think my back person tears.
Speaker 2: Yeah, y'all aren't even near tears. You're just like kind
Speaker 2: of sitting.
Speaker 4: And just like give me a second to like work
Speaker 4: them up.
Speaker 2: Show, I have to think about it a little more.
Speaker 4: Me think about huge boobs for a second, like make
Speaker 4: me start crying, getting sad just thinking about being a boner.
Speaker 2: Well, I said this at the live show, but I
Speaker 2: literally can't stop thinking about cave men breaking their backs.
Speaker 2: Like it's really been like haunting me, Like I just
Speaker 2: don't understand, like there's so many things about like.
Speaker 4: Yield, what the hell?
Speaker 2: What made you think that we were about to kiss?
Speaker 4: What? No, it totally seemed like that's totally seem like you're.
Speaker 3: Kiss.
Speaker 2: I was starting to talk and like he was ignoring
Speaker 2: me talking.
Speaker 4: Body was just like he just seemed like.
Speaker 3: Just like don't just don't do that, just don't be
Speaker 3: around you. Yeah me ow she hit me.
Speaker 5: That was really hit me.
Speaker 2: But yeah, Kaneman, like breaking their backs and like just
Speaker 2: breaking limbs and not being able to do absolutely anything
Speaker 2: about it really is freaking me out because I was
Speaker 2: really thinking about it, and at the live shire, I
Speaker 2: was like, what did they do that? Did they just
Speaker 2: leave him there? And they definitely just like took him
Speaker 2: back to the village like.
Speaker 3: Okay, and he just laid on his back and until he.
Speaker 2: Died, like like a m.
Speaker 4: Stop, take me to the hospital.
Speaker 3: Doctor.
Speaker 2: So the way this thought process started is I saw
Speaker 2: this video of a bear falling out a tree and
Speaker 2: like falling on his back. I was like, Okay, that
Speaker 2: bear definitely died. And then I was thinking, I don't
Speaker 2: know why. My brain immediate was to cave men who
Speaker 2: would fall out of trees, and I was like, oh
Speaker 2: my god, like, imagine y'all are all hunting, your homie
Speaker 2: falls out of a tree, breaks his fucking back. Like
Speaker 2: you don't know what they breaking your back is other
Speaker 2: than sexually, because you know they were fucking and like
Speaker 2: they would fucking be like, oh, what's my back?
Speaker 5: Next day?
Speaker 2: It takes a village to blow your back up. You
Speaker 2: just have a really.
Speaker 4: Strong This entire time since the live show, I thought
Speaker 4: you only meant it in a sexual way. No, I
Speaker 4: thought you were only talking about my brain is so poisoner?
Speaker 4: Seriously did you actually wasn't until right now that I
Speaker 4: was like, oh, she literally means breaking your No, yeah.
Speaker 2: I met literally like this motherfucker falls out of the tree,
Speaker 2: breaks his back, and people are like get up, like
Speaker 2: get up, like how did they even talk?
Speaker 6: They were like oogo booo, like boogo booo, like like
Speaker 6: like I literally don't know.
Speaker 3: That's like saying get up, but you.
Speaker 2: Can't get up, and you just take it back to
Speaker 2: the village and you let him die because it's like, damn,
Speaker 2: my homie's really dead for falling out of that tree.
Speaker 2: I didn't even because you know, hell the people fell
Speaker 2: out of trees and they like got up and they're like, oh,
Speaker 2: like kind of just embarrassed and kept it pushing, But
Speaker 2: like they had to have been the first one to
Speaker 2: fall out the tree and not get up and play
Speaker 2: it cool like.
Speaker 5: On the floor.
Speaker 4: What's crazy is it wasn't until like a hundred years ago,
Speaker 4: like if you broke your leg, you weren't just completely funny.
Speaker 2: I know.
Speaker 3: It wasn't until like literally like sixty years ago that
Speaker 3: like if you got like a bacterial infection.
Speaker 5: Like they could save you.
Speaker 3: Yeah, like if you got like the cold at the
Speaker 3: wrong time, like you would just die because we didn't
Speaker 3: understand germ theory. Like that's crazy.
Speaker 4: Like one hundred years ago, if you broke your ankle,
Speaker 4: the doctor were just coming with a leak. Yeah, Like dude,
Speaker 4: I honestly don't.
Speaker 3: Know just bro, what those Cavemens should have been doing
Speaker 3: is just taking some Elderberry, bro, like that.
Speaker 2: Ship's yeah, I zink an Elderberry, and they would have
Speaker 2: been chilled.
Speaker 3: Like I'm I'm anti holistic medicine now, not anti, but
Speaker 3: I'm like, I'm I'm pro letting my body do it's
Speaker 3: supposed to fucking do and let it figure it shit out.
Speaker 2: I'm low key pro big pharma because i was doing
Speaker 2: all the holistic ship for a week and I'm still
Speaker 2: fucking sick. And yeah, I'm like even more sick. I've
Speaker 2: been killing my immune system because I odd on fucking
Speaker 2: vitamin C and my body's like we don't need all this,
Speaker 2: like we need to purchase.
Speaker 3: I was reading this like research paper that was saying
Speaker 3: like if you have a sore throat, like if you
Speaker 3: kiss the boy sitting next to you, like passionately and
Speaker 3: like like make his dream come true, it'll fix you.
Speaker 2: That's like so blanket statement.
Speaker 3: I can show you the research paper.
Speaker 5: I'm gonna yeah, do it.
Speaker 4: No, are you guys about to kiss?
Speaker 2: I think we're gonna kiss soon. It's feeling like we're
Speaker 2: gonna kiss soon.
Speaker 4: Really wants it now? No, I'm sick.
Speaker 2: I'm sick. I'm sick, and I have my clothes on.
Speaker 2: I have a rule that I can only kiss Dree
Speaker 2: with my clothes off. Thinking about like.
Speaker 3: What Toxoplasma gandhi.
Speaker 2: Okay, no, I can't something about like cavemen with broken
Speaker 2: bones just like dying because like they didn't know what
Speaker 2: to do.
Speaker 3: Toxoplasma ganda makes you love cats. Parasite in their fucking
Speaker 3: bodies that they shoot out and it gets into the
Speaker 3: air and when you're petnam and ship and it gets
Speaker 3: into your body and takes over your mind and it
Speaker 3: makes you love cats. And that's a theory why we think.
Speaker 2: They Has it ever been proven?
Speaker 4: Yeah, Yeah, that one's proved. Also the one that it's
Speaker 4: like if you live with a cat, like people that
Speaker 4: are reckless drivers have a cat because there's I'm serious,
Speaker 4: it's bacteria. And yeah that like makes you like a
Speaker 4: reckless driver, yeah, or like more you take risks more.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's the risks.
Speaker 2: Well, I've been driving this way since I was in Miami.
Speaker 2: I've been driving since I was fourteen.
Speaker 3: But you had that license until we had that kitty
Speaker 3: Kitty purr with all the bacteria in it, making you
Speaker 3: a reckless driver in the box.
Speaker 2: Well, it used to be kitty perper, but recently it's
Speaker 2: deformed into.
Speaker 3: Giddy, giddy giddy. We didn't talk about Josiah going on
Speaker 3: American Idol and flopping down. We'll like have to bring.
Speaker 2: We have to bring them on here and talk about it.
Speaker 3: Right, And then I also had a dream that I
Speaker 3: was super swollen, like my face was super swollen. But
Speaker 3: we didn't really like think about the one hundred billion
Speaker 3: stars in the Milky Way. But there's three point four
Speaker 3: three point zero four trillion trees on this planet that
Speaker 3: doesn't register with my brain. And they say climate changes,
Speaker 3: I think.
Speaker 4: Yeah, there's four hundred and or four hundred and twenty
Speaker 4: two trees per person.
Speaker 3: See, if we all mind all four hundred of those,
Speaker 3: we could all make like twenty five bucks, and then
Speaker 3: we could solve a lot of issues.
Speaker 4: If that Black Friday is going to be lit.
Speaker 3: Yeah literally, Okay, let's oh wait, let's tap into Drew's brain.
Speaker 3: Floss god, oh, new segment, yeah, new segment segment alert.
Speaker 3: All right, I'm gonna talk about dB Cooper today. Okay,
Speaker 3: you're gonna like this one. So in the nineteen.
Speaker 4: It's like a cheesy smell.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Like there's a stinky smell. Do you smell that?
Speaker 2: I just like went and like blew my nose, so
Speaker 2: now I smell.
Speaker 4: It's just like those artisanal cheeses that you.
Speaker 5: Yeah, we got rid of it.
Speaker 3: It's not my crotch, it's the cheeses.
Speaker 2: We did get Wingstop again, and it might be the
Speaker 2: rotting Wingstop ranch in the.
Speaker 4: Oh, that's definitely what it is.
Speaker 3: Yeah or no. There's also Chipotle sour cream and the
Speaker 3: refrigerator and if you know anything about Chipotle, it's that
Speaker 3: that sour cream fucking stinky boots down Gaga. The house
Speaker 3: is burning, like it's the worst smell ever. Everyone who
Speaker 3: knows knows, and who if you don't know, you don't
Speaker 3: deserve to know. Period. Okay, but brain Floss, that's like
Speaker 3: part of the new intro. And we'll do we'll do, yeah,
Speaker 3: we'll do like the Drew Sap corner cut. We'll do
Speaker 3: something with that. Sure, sure, And it's just like historic events.
Speaker 2: I really don't like that.
Speaker 3: No, Like you're gonna have to figure it will add
Speaker 3: like a little title card and ship trails.
Speaker 2: Blaine Frooss, do you want to like put a like
Speaker 2: a vote coder.
Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, yeah, okay, we'll add like auto tune and ship,
Speaker 3: but make it like historic with like it's like coming
Speaker 3: through like a telephone.
Speaker 2: But coming through a tin can with floss.
Speaker 3: So this guy, d V. Cooper bought a one way
Speaker 3: plane ticket to Portland and.
Speaker 2: To white people Portland.
Speaker 3: Literally and no one was like suspecting a thing. There
Speaker 3: was like nothing going on. He wasn't being suspicious. He
Speaker 3: just sat in the back of the airplane and smoked
Speaker 3: a cigarette. Bring that back by literally bring that back,
Speaker 3: And the flight attendants weren't even like suspicious, like they
Speaker 3: were serving him. It was a vibe. It was a key.
Speaker 2: Well.
Speaker 3: Eventually, like part part way through the flight, he handed
Speaker 3: a flight attendant a note and the note said, I
Speaker 3: have a bomb. Sit next to me and we got
Speaker 3: to talk about some shit. And so she did.
Speaker 5: That's ultimate risk, yeah.
Speaker 3: Literally literally threatening someone with a fucking bomb. And so
Speaker 3: he like proceeded to open a suitcase or a briefcase
Speaker 3: that had like what looked like six pieces of dynamite
Speaker 3: in it. So she was like, oh, gag, Like I'd
Speaker 3: literally have to fucking sit down next to him or
Speaker 3: he's gonna blow this shit up, and he told her
Speaker 3: to tell radio command to land in Portland and then
Speaker 3: bring him two hundred thousand dollars and a parachute for
Speaker 3: exchange of all of the passengers on board. So he
Speaker 3: was like, you'll see, it's it's fucking crazy. So it
Speaker 3: was like one of the first times they like negotiated
Speaker 3: with a terrorist, and they were like, okay, like we
Speaker 3: just are gonna have to do this because like he
Speaker 3: literally has a bomb and he'll kill everybody on board,
Speaker 3: and he doesn't give a fuck, like he has nothing
Speaker 3: to lose. He didn't know who he was at the point,
Speaker 3: so they obeyed. They brought him to two hundred thousand
Speaker 3: dollars in cash and a parachute this video, yeah literally,
Speaker 3: and they like let him go. They literally let him
Speaker 3: fucking hijack the airplane and go. And then halfway through
Speaker 3: his flight, I think he was flying to like I
Speaker 3: forget where he was flying. He was flying somewhere else, yeah,
Speaker 3: some some crazy shit like that. But then part way
Speaker 3: through the flight, he literally just jumped out of the
Speaker 3: back of this boeing with the cash and a parachute
Speaker 3: and was literally never seen again, Like he just disappeared go,
Speaker 3: I don't know that part of the story. I'm thinking
Speaker 3: there might be people that were like flying the plane
Speaker 3: and he was just like on board with them and
Speaker 3: had them at his like becking order. But he also
Speaker 3: could have been flying the fucking plane in the plane crash,
Speaker 3: which I think the plane actually might have crashed. But anyways,
Speaker 3: he jumped out of the back of this fucking plane
Speaker 3: with a parachute. And then a few years later there
Speaker 3: was like a new A long time later, like a
Speaker 3: decade later, a new story came out where this person
Speaker 3: like was just playing on the beach with their kids,
Speaker 3: and this kid was just like digging his sand castle
Speaker 3: and then found like a stack of cash, and then
Speaker 3: found another stack of cash, and then found three stacks
Speaker 3: of cash like in this hole in the ground. And
Speaker 3: everyone was like, oh my god, this is where dB
Speaker 3: Cooper jumped out, because they had like a twenty mile
Speaker 3: radius of where he landed, but this was like twenty
Speaker 3: miles away from where he landed. So everyone's like, oh either,
Speaker 3: because not all the cash stayed with him, Like they
Speaker 3: were like, oh either, Like these three stacks of cash
Speaker 3: floated down the river and somehow all man it magically
Speaker 3: ended up in this hole or these people stumbled upon
Speaker 3: D B. Cooper's like some of the cash he left behind,
Speaker 3: and like there's still remnants of him like in society.
Speaker 3: But I was like, damn, that would make a good
Speaker 3: ass movie or like a good ass episode in a
Speaker 3: show or something.
Speaker 2: Because the kid who found all of it was Leonardo DiCaprio.
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, and that's how he.
Speaker 2: Could afford acting school really. Yeah, yeah, that's where that
Speaker 2: story was.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and Einstein, he gave some of the money that Einstein, seriously.
Speaker 2: And sign was standing outside of Burger King and wanted money,
Speaker 2: and Leonardo DiCaprio gave him two dollars.
Speaker 3: That's how we have Sinstein. Einstein gave Oppenheimer a chance,
Speaker 3: and that's dB Cooper essentially like heated the nuke in
Speaker 3: a way. Wow, yeah, you.
Speaker 2: Should know these kind of things.
Speaker 4: It's like Opheimer's in the vlog squad and that's how
Speaker 4: he got big.
Speaker 2: Have you seen Oppenheimer on Live like begging for tips?
Speaker 3: Yeah, he fell off, weird, he filled the funk off.
Speaker 2: But yeah, I believe that story.
Speaker 3: No, it's all real, It all has d B.
Speaker 2: Cooper, d B.
Speaker 3: Cooper, Yeah, d B. Cooper gag. He was unidentified. They
Speaker 3: still haven't found him, but they found his parachute and
Speaker 3: some money, and they wait, I gotta find out what
Speaker 3: happened to the plane. Oh wait, the plane was still
Speaker 3: active and it flew a few times after that, several
Speaker 3: times actually, and eventually was last flown to with Key
Speaker 3: Airlines when she retired. And then she was retired and
Speaker 3: scrapped the airplane, so it survives. So I guess they
Speaker 3: had like people from a plane or some shit, and
Speaker 3: they were like at his backing order, like they're gonna die.
Speaker 2: That would have happen if he was on my plane
Speaker 2: and I was the flight attendant, I would have just
Speaker 2: gave him the craziest head ever and he would have
Speaker 2: been like, actually is better than myney go.
Speaker 3: You know, if I was anybody on that fucking fly,
Speaker 3: I would not have let that shit slide.
Speaker 2: That's what I'm saying.
Speaker 3: I would have liked.
Speaker 2: I'm the kind of person that I see something unfolding
Speaker 2: it I'm like, not today, something is wrong with me
Speaker 2: because I will never forget being on a flight with
Speaker 2: Johnny Knoxville, and my biggest fear was the plane going
Speaker 2: down and nobody giving a fuck that I died because
Speaker 2: Johnny Knoxville was on the flight. Like that was like,
Speaker 2: my that's all I can think about the whole flights.
Speaker 2: I was like, this plane better not fucking go down
Speaker 2: because no, I'm going to trend on TikTok for you
Speaker 2: page for twenty minutes, but Johnny Knoxville will outshine me.
Speaker 3: No. That's really like the deepest darkest parts of my ego. Yeah,
Speaker 3: when I was like sixteen seventeen eighteen, like flying across
Speaker 3: the country and like borderline hoping that my plane would
Speaker 3: crash and everybody on board would die, but I would
Speaker 3: be the lone survivor, like, oh my god, like.
Speaker 4: You would like barely be hurt.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Literally, I would like my plane seat would like detach
Speaker 3: and it would act as like a parachute and I
Speaker 3: would just kind of like float down and maybe break
Speaker 3: a leg or two because I like having broken bones,
Speaker 3: like I.
Speaker 4: Always wanted that, like in those fantasies. But I would
Speaker 4: have like a little cute cut, like under my.
Speaker 3: Country cut in school, like a scar. I imagine getting
Speaker 3: a sleigh scarf from like up here on your forehead
Speaker 3: all the way down your cheek.
Speaker 2: Like Harry Potter be like yeah, and.
Speaker 4: You're in math, and all the girls were like, oh
Speaker 4: my god, like literally what happened? And I was like,
Speaker 4: I really want.
Speaker 2: To go back to school. I would literally have the
Speaker 2: biggest ego ever. I'd be like, you think I need
Speaker 2: to go to school?
Speaker 3: I literally signed, deer. I just signed a book deal
Speaker 3: for a three hundred thousand.
Speaker 2: What's a book deer?
Speaker 4: Wait? What is that?
Speaker 3: It's like when I get done banging your mama from
Speaker 3: the back, Like it's like, oh, like, sign the book, deer,
Speaker 3: because it's like a memo pad of everyone.
Speaker 2: Memo pad outside your room. That was a good, safe.
Speaker 3: Sy up corner. The world hasn't been right since Sappopeye
Speaker 3: Chicken Sandwich came out. Shut up, I might have done these.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think you did that one.
Speaker 3: We should replace mental illness with swag.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Fuck y'all. Be like, I'm so bored staying at home
Speaker 3: all the time. Bro go ten feet outside of your
Speaker 3: home and dig up some worms and make them a
Speaker 3: little house out of sticks and mud and make them
Speaker 3: get married.
Speaker 7: You.
Speaker 3: If you cheat on me, you're only hurting her grandma
Speaker 3: because me and my homies jumping.
Speaker 2: Her up up.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I think you did these.
Speaker 3: When I do Drew sab Corner. It's mainly for last
Speaker 3: but watch out, you might learn a thing or two.
Speaker 2: Did that last week?
Speaker 4: You're like, I do like this bit of just saying
Speaker 4: all of them again.
Speaker 3: I'm gonna have to because no one's emailing me any
Speaker 3: new ones.
Speaker 4: We've gotten emails. We've got emails.
Speaker 3: Really, I swear what. I don't check that email ever
Speaker 3: you gotta send, you gotta afford those to me. Okay,
Speaker 3: get the meme page. That's the literally goaded meme of
Speaker 3: all time. Just insert that like insert that one.
Speaker 2: Someone help me. I think my leg is broking out
Speaker 2: my son that I hate?
Speaker 4: What does that eart me that? That's one of my favorite?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 3: I did, We'll do sugar Storm, Trent Reznor at Last,
Speaker 3: I Am Free two thousand and eight, Chic Pack Your
Speaker 3: Romantic Mind, Stereo verandah Maison book Girl. And you hates
Speaker 3: that song?
Speaker 2: What song is that? Oh?
Speaker 3: Yeah? I love that song? Walk on By otis the
Speaker 3: third walk.
Speaker 7: On By.
Speaker 3: And that's it. That's all you get. I'm watching ju
Speaker 3: didzukais in still Gucci Oh bitch one. We watched admittedly
Speaker 3: only part of the Beyonce documentary because we had to
Speaker 3: leave very early because there were some things going on
Speaker 3: in some people's lives that we had to attend to
Speaker 3: and we didn't want to leave them, and they were
Speaker 3: in my car. But from what I saw, it was
Speaker 3: Gucci down to the socks. Like it was so good.
Speaker 3: It literally felt like I was there again, like the same.
Speaker 2: It made me want to go back to our concert
Speaker 2: so bad, and I was like, oh my god, if
Speaker 2: she doesn't tour again, I think I'm gonna explode.
Speaker 3: We have like five years before another tour at least, yeah,
Speaker 3: literally at least and by then, like I don't know
Speaker 3: she'll be touring like that.
Speaker 2: I don't know if I'll be alive.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Period, we're gonna hijack some airplanes or cause a gas
Speaker 3: leak in our house and settle on some insurance money.
Speaker 3: The fuck that's not gonna happen. And then I also
Speaker 3: we also watched us a documentary Love Is Something, Loves.
Speaker 2: One Lot One is so and it was so good.
Speaker 3: It just like follows like this weird fucking cult that
Speaker 3: it really it's really good because you really get to
Speaker 3: see the minds of the people that are like involved
Speaker 3: in a cult and you kind of start to understand
Speaker 3: how and why people like get involved in colts, and
Speaker 3: it's just really fascinating.
Speaker 2: And honestly because it's like one of the first like
Speaker 2: cult things that you see where the people who were
Speaker 2: a part of the cult are one still alive in
Speaker 2: two actually like telling the story.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, yeah, but yeah watch Love has One. And
Speaker 3: then I'll let you do your media.
Speaker 2: And then mine is obscured by the Smashing Pumpkins, Surrender
Speaker 2: by Suicide, I Love You, Gold and Blue, Sonic Youth
Speaker 2: Still Bumping Oral both physically, and the one by Bjork
Speaker 2: and Rosalia Rosalia I always say, I used to say
Speaker 2: Rosalia like she was like an old lady Rosalia by
Speaker 2: moon Age day Dream by David Bowie. And then there's
Speaker 2: these two uh seeger Ross songs, but they literally I
Speaker 2: can't say them, but it's like s A E G
Speaker 2: L O p U R. And then the other one
Speaker 2: is s V E F N. No one's gonna even
Speaker 2: look this up, like I'm not. Yeah, y'all, y'all don't
Speaker 2: give a fuck, like you fucking hate me. And then yeah,
Speaker 2: we have the same media, So that's it for me.
Speaker 3: I will say, y'all, don't have these, and you're not
Speaker 3: special enough to have these, but they do drop on
Speaker 3: the seventh.
Speaker 2: The Happy ninety nine Rebok.
Speaker 3: Yes, I have a pair if you want to be
Speaker 3: if you want to be cool like me, and then
Speaker 3: you go coptos.
Speaker 2: I have a parent, so I'm cool like automatically.
Speaker 3: They are actually so fucking cool period dot all.
Speaker 5: Right, and that's our media of the week.
Speaker 2: Thank you guys so much for watching I'm Sick. I'm sick.
Speaker 2: Somebody send me love level cure all level three loves
Speaker 2: all right.
Speaker 7: Ye
Speaker 4: M hm