WEBVTT - Lucky Yates Gets in a Fight With Burt Reynolds 0:00:01.040 --> 0:00:04.400 If even me does it call for a really ratty, 0:00:05.840 --> 0:00:10.000 like decade old monkey puppet to stand up. They're smart 0:00:10.039 --> 0:00:13.360 assing while another guy is trying to deliver a speech. 0:00:13.920 --> 0:00:36.960 Don't do that. Yeah, you know, it's not always easy 0:00:37.200 --> 0:00:40.360 being a host. Sometimes you talk too much and your 0:00:40.440 --> 0:00:42.640 voice gets raspy and sexy, and you need a gargle 0:00:42.680 --> 0:00:47.040 throat coat t and peptobismo. It works. Sometimes you're reading 0:00:47.040 --> 0:00:49.960 a teleprompter and it's moving too fast or displays words 0:00:50.000 --> 0:00:52.720 you don't know how to pronounce. And sometimes you make 0:00:52.800 --> 0:00:56.320 one joke and someone storms the stage and attacks you. 0:00:56.880 --> 0:00:58.520 Now you may think I'm talking about Chris Rock and 0:00:58.520 --> 0:01:01.560 Will Smith, but I'm actually talking about Lucky Yates and 0:01:01.680 --> 0:01:05.360 Burt Reynolds. Now, Lucky as an actor, comedian and vo 0:01:05.520 --> 0:01:09.199 legend who you may recognize from Archer or Homestar Runner 0:01:09.600 --> 0:01:12.440 or maybe the Adventure of Elmo and Grouchland. He's also 0:01:12.640 --> 0:01:15.080 a host in a Puppeteer and that's where he found 0:01:15.160 --> 0:01:18.959 himself catching smoke from the bandit himself. I'm your host, 0:01:19.040 --> 0:01:22.920 Will Bearskin Rug McFadden, and this is hashtag Storytime brought 0:01:22.959 --> 0:01:28.880 to you by iHeartRadio. So we're around like two thousand 0:01:28.920 --> 0:01:35.120 and five area, all right of time, and it was 0:01:35.200 --> 0:01:40.120 at the Atlanta Film Festival, which is now like a 0:01:40.200 --> 0:01:46.679 really great, well respected film festival, right, yeah, prestigious, But 0:01:46.720 --> 0:01:48.240 in two thousand and five, I'm sure it was just 0:01:48.320 --> 0:01:50.280 getting it well. In two thousand and five they were 0:01:50.320 --> 0:01:53.840 making the conscientious effort. No, that's not true. They were, 0:01:53.960 --> 0:01:57.680 they were they were going in that direction. But I 0:01:57.720 --> 0:02:01.520 think they were because it started as just this really 0:02:02.080 --> 0:02:07.680 sort of cool indie I'm like, super indie, maybe local 0:02:07.920 --> 0:02:12.079 staff or at least Southeast you know, filmmaking and all 0:02:12.080 --> 0:02:14.080 that kind of stuff. And then as it went on, 0:02:14.200 --> 0:02:16.920 it you know, started becoming the other thing that people 0:02:16.960 --> 0:02:19.160 would submit to. And then it's sort of growing. And 0:02:19.200 --> 0:02:21.440 so they were in this weird space of like they 0:02:21.440 --> 0:02:25.880 were getting prestigious, but they still wanted to keep this 0:02:25.919 --> 0:02:30.639 sort of raw, edgy thing about them. Yeah, right, and 0:02:30.720 --> 0:02:34.840 so forever, for like the last twenty five years, I've 0:02:34.840 --> 0:02:37.480 been working at a theater here in Dad's garage called 0:02:37.560 --> 0:02:43.280 Dad's Garage Theater, and it's an improv comedy theater and 0:02:43.320 --> 0:02:48.240 we also do scripted plays like actual theater. Yeah, so 0:02:48.400 --> 0:02:52.160 it's you know, comedy, but then also comedy plays but 0:02:52.360 --> 0:02:55.079 plays and then now we do all self produced work. 0:02:55.120 --> 0:02:58.840 But back then anyway, always have been sort of the 0:02:59.320 --> 0:03:02.640 naughty kid in town, you know, opened in nineteen ninety 0:03:02.639 --> 0:03:07.240 five and just sort of the rise of South Park 0:03:07.400 --> 0:03:10.240 and the rise of Dad's Garage were kind of happening 0:03:10.280 --> 0:03:13.240 at the same time, and they people would relate like, oh, yeah, 0:03:13.240 --> 0:03:16.120 they're like the South Park. If you like that, you'll 0:03:16.120 --> 0:03:20.440 love Dad's Garage kind of thing. So they hired one 0:03:20.480 --> 0:03:22.840 of my very best friends, I believe maybe even now 0:03:22.960 --> 0:03:26.600 he wasn't he we was post us being roommates, but 0:03:26.680 --> 0:03:29.000 we had been roommates for a while. One of my 0:03:29.080 --> 0:03:31.120 very best friends, a guy named Sean Daniels, who is 0:03:31.480 --> 0:03:36.880 huge in the theater world right now, and he was 0:03:36.920 --> 0:03:41.720 our artistic director, and they hired him to host this 0:03:41.920 --> 0:03:46.520 award show that was kicking off the Atlanta Film Festival, 0:03:47.120 --> 0:03:50.040 and we were they were going to give awards to 0:03:50.440 --> 0:03:57.560 big name people who for their work on independent film 0:03:57.560 --> 0:04:02.320 in Georgia, right or I was under the impression that 0:04:02.400 --> 0:04:06.440 it was independent film in Georgia and not any film 0:04:06.440 --> 0:04:09.600 in Georgia, right. But they're basically trying to swear mister Reynolds, 0:04:09.640 --> 0:04:12.920 and I differed in our opinion. I see they enter 0:04:13.040 --> 0:04:16.440 mister Reynolds, but they're probably trying yet, but they're trying 0:04:16.480 --> 0:04:19.799 to draw in, you know, a certain caliber of celebrity 0:04:19.839 --> 0:04:22.800 with this move. Is that what? And they're giving awards 0:04:22.800 --> 0:04:26.760 to Parker Posey. Fuck yeah, in indie film Darling Parker 0:04:26.800 --> 0:04:34.640 Posey did stuff in Georgia. Uh they did? Uh? I 0:04:34.800 --> 0:04:39.640 believe it was Ruby D. Both Ossie Davis and Ruby 0:04:39.680 --> 0:04:42.200 D were here, Okay, but I want to say they 0:04:42.200 --> 0:04:45.120 were giving the award to Ruby maybe both of them, 0:04:45.200 --> 0:04:49.200 I can't remember, they were both present at the time. Yeah. 0:04:49.279 --> 0:04:53.039 And then Burt Reynolds, which I guess they were using 0:04:53.800 --> 0:05:00.599 Deliverance as the independent film hook, even though I don't 0:05:00.600 --> 0:05:03.400 know when that film came out, but I was alive 0:05:03.440 --> 0:05:05.479 when it came out, and I remember it being a 0:05:05.640 --> 0:05:08.600 very big deal at the movies. Yes, and this is 0:05:08.640 --> 0:05:10.039 two thousand and five, so I'm trying to think of 0:05:10.040 --> 0:05:13.960 this as pre or post Boogie Nights at this point. Oh, 0:05:14.080 --> 0:05:16.960 this was post okay, so he kind of already he 0:05:16.960 --> 0:05:20.839 had already become a thing and then was sort of 0:05:21.040 --> 0:05:25.479 really sliding back down. Right. This was Yeah, this was 0:05:25.560 --> 0:05:29.880 not a good Burt Reynolds anyway, So when they approached 0:05:29.880 --> 0:05:32.680 Sean back in these days, we were a couple of 0:05:32.720 --> 0:05:37.120 real rascals together, and I am a puppeteer. It's one 0:05:37.120 --> 0:05:42.800 of the performance It might be my favorite medium of 0:05:42.920 --> 0:05:45.680 performance from all the things that I do. I really 0:05:45.680 --> 0:05:50.200 love puppetry and we have I and we have always 0:05:50.240 --> 0:05:54.159 done puppets at Dad's garage. And so when they were like, hey, 0:05:54.320 --> 0:05:57.920 we want you to host this event, Sean, but we're 0:05:57.920 --> 0:06:00.200 trying to get the stuffiness out of the room so 0:06:00.520 --> 0:06:04.280 you can do whatever you want, Sean just goes puppets 0:06:04.839 --> 0:06:07.919 and they're like, great, that's gonna be great. And so 0:06:08.000 --> 0:06:10.640 he just tells me, hey, man, we're gonna host the 0:06:10.760 --> 0:06:14.839 thing and bring a puppet. Bring Phineas the Monkey, which 0:06:14.920 --> 0:06:17.920 was like my signature puppet at Dad's at the time 0:06:18.400 --> 0:06:21.119 in our kids show. Like this also feels like Crank 0:06:21.200 --> 0:06:23.520 Anchors time, you know, Like I feel like Crank Ankers 0:06:23.560 --> 0:06:26.680 was in the late nineties, early two I guess maybe 0:06:26.880 --> 0:06:31.760 maybe it was so like Phineas was from our Kids show, 0:06:31.800 --> 0:06:34.080 but you know, it was a very smartassy kids show 0:06:34.080 --> 0:06:36.200 that you could get away with back then, the best 0:06:36.279 --> 0:06:41.400 kind like barely. Uh So, yeah, maybe Crank anyway, I 0:06:41.520 --> 0:06:45.240 got crank anchors. It's truly on Burt Reynolds's radar. It's true. 0:06:45.279 --> 0:06:49.640 It's very true. Now, so you know show it's like puppets. 0:06:49.680 --> 0:06:53.560 We're gonna bring Phineas. And I'm like, okay, great, let's 0:06:53.600 --> 0:06:57.760 do this. Let's fuck around. And so we show up 0:06:57.839 --> 0:07:01.080 and it's at the our Fox Theater, have Fox Theater here, 0:07:01.160 --> 0:07:03.479 and there's a there's a few of them left in 0:07:03.560 --> 0:07:07.320 the country, and they're the old movie palaces, right, They're 0:07:07.360 --> 0:07:12.360 just absolutely stunning inside. And so it's in the Fox Theater, 0:07:12.480 --> 0:07:19.040 in this grand ballroom, and we bring this dad's garage's 0:07:19.080 --> 0:07:24.160 a tiny, low budget theater. We bring this shitty like 0:07:24.440 --> 0:07:28.960 log set piece that I usually used in the kid 0:07:29.040 --> 0:07:33.239 show for me to hide behind while Sean is standing 0:07:33.280 --> 0:07:36.880 on stage like reading cards and just sort of making 0:07:37.000 --> 0:07:40.000 fun of the events as we go along. We didn't 0:07:40.000 --> 0:07:42.480 really know what to do. But the whole time, I'm like, 0:07:43.160 --> 0:07:46.400 how are we justifying that a monkey is here? And 0:07:46.440 --> 0:07:49.120 He's like, I don't know, and I'm like, well, we've 0:07:49.160 --> 0:07:52.560 got to say something. It's so absurd, especially since we 0:07:52.640 --> 0:07:56.120 have that piece of shit thig up there, Like what 0:07:56.200 --> 0:07:59.680 are we gonna say? And so we were like, this 0:07:59.720 --> 0:08:02.920 is probably fifteen minutes before we go on stair. I 0:08:02.960 --> 0:08:04.840 was going to say, is this rehearsal or is are 0:08:04.880 --> 0:08:09.600 we lying? You know the rehearsal. There is no rehearsal. 0:08:10.000 --> 0:08:14.960 Shot submitted a script. Maybe, I guess. I don't know. 0:08:15.280 --> 0:08:18.560 I was there to smart ass. That's what my job was. 0:08:20.320 --> 0:08:27.960 So as as we decide like, okay, Phineas, I'm gonna 0:08:27.960 --> 0:08:32.920 say that Phineas is a huge Hollywood movie producer. He's 0:08:32.960 --> 0:08:38.800 from a giant studio and he's here to exploit the 0:08:38.840 --> 0:08:42.040 indie film scene. He's here to grab some good ideas 0:08:42.160 --> 0:08:45.280 and put in more car chases and more plane crashes. 0:08:45.520 --> 0:08:48.400 Love it. It's basically the Michael by the Michael Bay 0:08:48.559 --> 0:08:51.400 that a monkey, a monkey is a big time producer 0:08:51.400 --> 0:08:54.640 in Hollywood. That's what idiots are. Yeah, brilliant. It was 0:08:54.640 --> 0:08:57.720 either that or going on in the actual film theater 0:08:57.840 --> 0:08:59.880 of the Fox Theater that night was Lord of the Ring, 0:09:00.240 --> 0:09:02.080 which we should have gone with this, as I was 0:09:02.120 --> 0:09:04.439 gonna say, I was, I walked into the wrong room, 0:09:05.000 --> 0:09:07.240 but I was gonna stick it out here anyway. I 0:09:07.280 --> 0:09:09.240 should have gone with the Lord of the Rings thing 0:09:09.440 --> 0:09:15.280 instead of a Hollywood approach. But it's a film award festival. Yeah, 0:09:15.320 --> 0:09:20.680 I tried. I tried to support indie film by making 0:09:20.760 --> 0:09:32.400 fun of big Hollywood. Yeah that's perfect. Okay, So that's 0:09:32.440 --> 0:09:36.800 our game plan. Sean has a little script that he 0:09:36.880 --> 0:09:41.000 submitted that was very you know, like fun and fun 0:09:41.040 --> 0:09:42.800 and weird and funny and weird and you know, a 0:09:42.840 --> 0:09:49.199 little goofy. But nothing, nothing we did at all was anyway. 0:09:49.240 --> 0:09:53.120 Like as as bad boys as we are, we're also 0:09:53.520 --> 0:09:57.319 like goodhearted. We would never do anything mean or cruel 0:09:57.400 --> 0:10:01.120 for any reason, and we didn't. That's the crazy part 0:10:01.160 --> 0:10:05.640 about it. That being said, the monkey was not going 0:10:05.679 --> 0:10:08.960 over well ever, Like when we brought the thing out, 0:10:09.040 --> 0:10:15.120 there was just uh uh and we're like, oh shit, 0:10:15.200 --> 0:10:16.880 we're in trouble. And I got to sit out there 0:10:17.040 --> 0:10:19.200 the whole time with my arm up in the air 0:10:19.720 --> 0:10:22.720 with a mic on, and I'm hot. I myself am 0:10:22.800 --> 0:10:26.760 hidden from the audience. I'm behind this dumb tree log 0:10:26.920 --> 0:10:29.840 thing with a monkey puppet. This I wish I still 0:10:29.840 --> 0:10:33.720 had him. He rotted away. Oh no, So I come 0:10:33.800 --> 0:10:36.119 up and I'm just like, I'm here to explain Hollywood 0:10:36.160 --> 0:10:39.240 and then we give you know, we do bad jokes 0:10:39.320 --> 0:10:43.240 and you know, I'm I'm making fun of how I was. 0:10:43.679 --> 0:10:46.559 I had in the works. I was going to remake 0:10:47.440 --> 0:10:52.280 My Dinner with Andre, which, for anyone unfamiliar with the 0:10:52.320 --> 0:10:55.679 film My Dinner with Andrea, it's Wallace, Sean and I 0:10:55.760 --> 0:10:58.920 don't can't remember who else. That's the only important part 0:10:58.960 --> 0:11:03.400 is in her but is it is two people sitting 0:11:03.400 --> 0:11:08.520 at dinner for two hours talking. That's the movie. And 0:11:08.679 --> 0:11:10.520 so I was, I said I was going to do 0:11:11.160 --> 0:11:13.280 My Dinner. I was. I was already had in the 0:11:13.280 --> 0:11:16.640 works a big remake with of My Dinner with Andre 0:11:16.760 --> 0:11:20.400 with Brad Pitt and Vin Diesel, and it was going 0:11:20.480 --> 0:11:22.920 to be two and a half hours of a mumbling 0:11:22.960 --> 0:11:28.520 conversation with car Chase in the middle. I'd watch it. 0:11:28.600 --> 0:11:31.319 So that's the kind of shit we're throwing out there, 0:11:31.440 --> 0:11:35.240 right right right. Parker Posey comes and gets her award. First. 0:11:35.760 --> 0:11:38.960 She is, I don't know, maybe a little lit. Maybe 0:11:38.800 --> 0:11:42.319 it's Parker Posey, so who knows? She's snarky. She she 0:11:42.360 --> 0:11:46.560 gets up there, she looks over at the monkey and 0:11:46.679 --> 0:11:49.439 I think I said something like I love you, Parker Posey, 0:11:50.160 --> 0:11:53.800 and she just went, I just want everyone to know 0:11:54.520 --> 0:11:58.080 there's a man sitting on the floor back there, and 0:11:58.120 --> 0:12:02.560 I was just like yay, Parker Posey called it out. Yeah. 0:12:03.280 --> 0:12:06.719 So I'm thinking like, okay, cool, this is like we 0:12:06.760 --> 0:12:09.880 gotta good, good good. I'm being acknowledged, right, this is dumb, 0:12:10.000 --> 0:12:12.280 gread this is funny that she gotta laugh doing it. 0:12:12.320 --> 0:12:15.640 We gotta think to go with Ruby D. It was 0:12:15.720 --> 0:12:18.800 ruby D because it was nothing but grace that so 0:12:19.120 --> 0:12:21.560 she gets her awarded, it comes up and you know, 0:12:21.600 --> 0:12:24.480 the whole thing, and then goes back and it sits, 0:12:24.559 --> 0:12:29.200 and then and then Burt Reynolds and before going into 0:12:29.240 --> 0:12:33.720 it though both Sean and I at this point huge 0:12:33.760 --> 0:12:39.120 Burt Reynolds fans, Huge Burt Reynolds fans. Yeah. So Sean, 0:12:39.280 --> 0:12:41.720 as a part of his pre written, pre approved speech, 0:12:42.520 --> 0:12:46.120 goes on about how much he loves Burt Reynolds. In fact, 0:12:46.160 --> 0:12:48.920 he said, I caught a lot of heat when I 0:12:49.000 --> 0:12:52.760 was younger because I insisted that Cannonball Run two is 0:12:52.760 --> 0:12:57.200 a better film than the original Cannonball Run. And you know, 0:12:58.040 --> 0:13:01.560 like little applause from the audience. Burt Reynolds is taking 0:13:01.880 --> 0:13:05.840 all of this as an attack, just like all of it. 0:13:06.920 --> 0:13:12.040 So he he like, we go into like how much 0:13:12.080 --> 0:13:18.120 we love him, say his name. He comes very slowly, 0:13:18.320 --> 0:13:23.160 sort of sauntering up on stage because I don't know 0:13:23.200 --> 0:13:27.120 how old Burt Reynolds was in uh two thousand and five, 0:13:28.240 --> 0:13:30.079 but he looked like he was one hundred and eight 0:13:30.160 --> 0:13:33.360 years old. Yeah, he had so much plastic surgery that 0:13:33.440 --> 0:13:36.480 he did not look like a real human being. It 0:13:36.520 --> 0:13:40.439 was weird up close. It was so sure. He's probably 0:13:40.480 --> 0:13:43.120 sauced up too, you know, he's probably he was, you know, 0:13:43.600 --> 0:13:51.520 the runk, the runk he gets. He gets to the 0:13:51.600 --> 0:14:01.480 podium and he, I think, says one shitty thing about 0:14:01.720 --> 0:14:05.480 Sean and myself, about how dare we or something like that. 0:14:05.520 --> 0:14:09.520 Like he opened with a shitty line, to which the 0:14:09.600 --> 0:14:15.200 monkey replied, I love you, mister Reynolds. And he looks 0:14:15.240 --> 0:14:18.680 over at the monkey. I'm sitting on the floor and 0:14:18.760 --> 0:14:22.080 I'm looking at him, but he never looked at me once. 0:14:22.400 --> 0:14:27.560 He only looked at the monkey. He comes strolling slowly 0:14:28.160 --> 0:14:36.960 over but aggressively as he grabs so phineas is as 0:14:37.040 --> 0:14:39.240 like a sort of a muppety. It's called an arm 0:14:39.240 --> 0:14:41.560 and rod puppet, hand and rod puppet, and you've got 0:14:41.600 --> 0:14:43.520 your hand up in the head doing the mouth and 0:14:43.520 --> 0:14:45.680 then you've got two rods and you're doing the arms, 0:14:46.320 --> 0:14:50.560 and he comes in. He grabs Phineas's mouth, both the jaws, 0:14:51.040 --> 0:14:54.920 and he's trying to pry I think he's trying to 0:14:55.040 --> 0:15:02.280 rip the puppet into I think, yeah, never acknowledging that 0:15:02.320 --> 0:15:08.600 there's a man, a much younger man, attached to the puppet. 0:15:09.800 --> 0:15:15.000 And he made the most inhuman sound I have ever 0:15:15.080 --> 0:15:21.480 heard in my life, which which was this, like he 0:15:21.600 --> 0:15:27.400 was full of rage, full of old man rage. Who 0:15:27.520 --> 0:15:35.760 if he would in a hand while he was trying 0:15:35.760 --> 0:15:38.240 to rip my hand apart, like trying to rip the 0:15:38.240 --> 0:15:41.840 monkey's face apart with my hand in it. And all 0:15:41.880 --> 0:15:47.440 I could think was, oh my god, Renalds is so weak. 0:15:48.320 --> 0:15:53.040 It's a weak old man. And so I just I 0:15:53.160 --> 0:15:56.840 just closed my hand and rolled and rolled the puppet down. 0:15:57.280 --> 0:16:00.440 It got him into my lap, and then he went 0:16:00.560 --> 0:16:04.760 stumbling back to his podium, and like for the next 0:16:04.800 --> 0:16:08.160 ten minutes, it was a long, rambling speech. If it 0:16:08.240 --> 0:16:11.440 wasn't ten minutes, it seemed like ten minutes long. Starts 0:16:11.480 --> 0:16:19.080 with laying into us and how dare we make fun 0:16:19.160 --> 0:16:24.440 of Hollywood? And how dare we make fun of cannonball run? 0:16:24.720 --> 0:16:29.040 It made this much money in the theaters, and seng went, 0:16:29.960 --> 0:16:33.440 I said, I loved Cannonball Run. But Burt Reynolds didn't listen, 0:16:34.160 --> 0:16:40.080 and he how dare we go after Brad Pitt? Do 0:16:40.200 --> 0:16:46.240 we know how much Brad Pitt is worth? You people 0:16:46.360 --> 0:16:51.560 don't have any idea, And then just like sort of 0:16:51.760 --> 0:16:55.800 touches on his film work in Georgia, but he mostly 0:16:55.920 --> 0:17:00.200 talks about Smokey and the Bandit, which then leads to 0:17:00.360 --> 0:17:05.159 his very long rant about Sally Field and how she 0:17:05.480 --> 0:17:08.400 was really the one and he let her get away 0:17:08.520 --> 0:17:12.959 and he should never have done that, and there was 0:17:13.200 --> 0:17:16.680 might have been a couple of Lonnie jabs in there. 0:17:16.720 --> 0:17:24.359 Like it went on and on and on and on, 0:17:24.920 --> 0:17:30.000 and I'm behind a log underneath like the audience can't 0:17:30.040 --> 0:17:34.879 see me, and I'm looking upstage at my partner, Sean Daniels, 0:17:35.720 --> 0:17:39.720 who has to stand upstage and just take it all 0:17:40.720 --> 0:17:44.000 fully in front of everybody, just standing and I'm just like, 0:17:44.240 --> 0:17:46.959 oh my god, and he's just looking at me like 0:17:47.080 --> 0:17:49.919 shut up, shut up, and I'm just like, what are 0:17:49.920 --> 0:17:53.760 we doing. We gotta get out of here. I never 0:17:53.840 --> 0:17:56.960 bought the puppet back up, like it just was Sean 0:17:57.200 --> 0:18:02.080 for the rest of the time, and afterwards, we couldn't 0:18:02.200 --> 0:18:05.000 book the fuck out of there fast enough. And as 0:18:05.040 --> 0:18:08.159 I was walking past Burt Reynolds on my way out, 0:18:08.200 --> 0:18:11.960 I heard him say to the crowd around him, I 0:18:12.040 --> 0:18:15.000 think it might have gone a little far up there, 0:18:16.119 --> 0:18:25.720 and I was like, Oh my god. At the time, 0:18:26.840 --> 0:18:31.840 I was working at a local radio station, ninety six 0:18:31.960 --> 0:18:35.000 Rock and on the morning show and it was the 0:18:35.040 --> 0:18:38.760 Regular Guy Show, and it was the biggest radio morning 0:18:38.800 --> 0:18:41.719 show in Atlanta at the time, and I went in 0:18:41.760 --> 0:18:45.879 there with the story the next day with this huge 0:18:45.920 --> 0:18:51.240 scoop and dude, the story took off. Sean and I 0:18:51.359 --> 0:18:55.040 are doing radio interviews all over the country. We're doing 0:18:55.040 --> 0:18:59.520 all these phoners about Burt Reynolds attacking the Monkey. Then 0:18:59.640 --> 0:19:04.920 Nash Inquirer runs a piece that our fight stats as 0:19:04.960 --> 0:19:08.600 the Burt Reynolds and Phineas J. Monkey had a boxing 0:19:08.640 --> 0:19:12.879 match coming up, their fight stats and everything like that 0:19:13.000 --> 0:19:15.720 and what pitted, and then a little article about what happened. 0:19:15.760 --> 0:19:20.160 Oh my god. And then I get a I think 0:19:20.160 --> 0:19:23.720 it was an email from somebody that was producing the 0:19:23.800 --> 0:19:26.360 Daily Show at the time with John Stewart, and they 0:19:26.359 --> 0:19:28.920 were like, hey, we heard about this Burt Reynolds story. 0:19:29.520 --> 0:19:31.080 Is there any way you can get a tape of it? 0:19:31.119 --> 0:19:34.439 And I was like, I'll find out. I know people 0:19:34.480 --> 0:19:37.200 in town. Let me give me a couple of days. 0:19:37.800 --> 0:19:40.400 And then I found a news agency that was there 0:19:40.440 --> 0:19:41.920 and they had a tape and they're like, yeah, we'll 0:19:41.920 --> 0:19:45.080 give you a tape of it. So I tell Sean, 0:19:45.119 --> 0:19:47.400 I'm like, dude, we can go on the Daily Show, 0:19:47.440 --> 0:19:49.480 like I can fuck Like what if we got Phineas, 0:19:49.520 --> 0:19:51.360 I'm gonna put a black eye on him and put 0:19:51.359 --> 0:19:53.359 his little arm in a sling. And all he wants 0:19:53.400 --> 0:19:56.480 is an apology, that's it. He just wants Burt Reynolds 0:19:56.480 --> 0:20:01.680 to apologize, like he clearly mistaken. We don't know how 0:20:01.720 --> 0:20:04.120 Figs went wrong, but we were talking about how much 0:20:04.119 --> 0:20:06.720 we actually loved Burr Reynolds and we just want him 0:20:06.720 --> 0:20:10.920 to apologize. It was yet and the board because we're 0:20:10.960 --> 0:20:14.040 a nonprofit theater and we were getting a lot of 0:20:14.080 --> 0:20:17.800 attention because of it. But the board I think probably 0:20:17.880 --> 0:20:22.480 wisely said, you know what, before we get on the 0:20:22.560 --> 0:20:27.640 Daily Show and cause more trouble, let's just stop this here. 0:20:28.520 --> 0:20:34.439 Let's not due. I am heartbroken, but I understand, like 0:20:34.960 --> 0:20:38.160 we could have turned this into gold, but also we're 0:20:38.200 --> 0:20:44.240 not in control of that show, so who knows. Yeah, 0:20:44.600 --> 0:20:48.560 pretty fun. And then he died, and then everybody was 0:20:48.600 --> 0:20:51.840 coming out about what absolutely horrible shit human being he was, 0:20:51.880 --> 0:20:54.320 and so I was like, oh cool, now, now don't 0:20:54.320 --> 0:20:56.600 feel so bad about my story about him attacking a 0:20:56.680 --> 0:20:59.800 monkey puppet I was operating, And I believe he thought 0:20:59.800 --> 0:21:03.400 that talking monkey was real, yeah, because well, first of all, 0:21:03.440 --> 0:21:05.719 it's insane that he was essentially trying to just like 0:21:05.840 --> 0:21:10.760 dislocate your thumb. I honestly think he was. He thought 0:21:10.800 --> 0:21:13.239 he was going to rip the puppet apart, right, I 0:21:13.280 --> 0:21:15.280 think that's what he was going for, Like he wanted 0:21:15.320 --> 0:21:17.639 to rip its face or maybe it's head off or 0:21:17.760 --> 0:21:21.640 something like that. But I mean like he'd like had 0:21:21.760 --> 0:21:25.200 old grandma strength. It really was like a two year 0:21:25.200 --> 0:21:27.200 old came up to you and tried to pry your 0:21:27.240 --> 0:21:29.439 hand apart, and I was like, what are you doing, 0:21:29.560 --> 0:21:33.760 little boy? Like, oh my god. I think while I 0:21:33.840 --> 0:21:36.800 was rolling down in Phineas's voice, the only thing I 0:21:36.840 --> 0:21:42.040 said was my career, and I just sat there. If 0:21:42.080 --> 0:21:45.120 he really did think it was a real monkey, then 0:21:45.760 --> 0:21:48.639 that's even more disturbing that he was like actually trying 0:21:48.680 --> 0:21:53.480 to murder like Peter would be all over it. He'd 0:21:53.560 --> 0:21:57.840 never looked at me once. I was looking at him 0:21:57.920 --> 0:21:59.680 right in the face as he was trying to rip 0:21:59.680 --> 0:22:03.560 that he has had a part, and he never acknowledged 0:22:03.600 --> 0:22:05.520 me that. On the walk over it, he was looking 0:22:05.600 --> 0:22:09.200 right at the monkey like during the part he was 0:22:09.240 --> 0:22:13.400 trying to Like Now, granted, he's a pro, right right, 0:22:13.640 --> 0:22:16.359 he's part of the show. The show is the monkey, 0:22:16.520 --> 0:22:19.800 not the man underneath it. He might not understand how 0:22:19.880 --> 0:22:23.200 it works, even though I'm right there make it with 0:22:23.240 --> 0:22:27.240 my lips moving. I'm not a ventriloquist. I have to hide, 0:22:28.680 --> 0:22:33.480 and so I really don't know. At the time, I 0:22:33.520 --> 0:22:36.439 was convinced he thought the monkey was a real talking monkey. 0:22:36.480 --> 0:22:38.840 I think I think this has to go with that 0:22:38.920 --> 0:22:42.040 because it's the plays best on the radio. I think 0:22:42.080 --> 0:22:45.320 it's a testament to how great of a puppeteer you are, 0:22:45.400 --> 0:22:50.560 that you actually fooled Burt Reynolds into thinking seventy five 0:22:50.640 --> 0:22:54.840 year old drunkard but the monkey was real. Yeah, that's impressive. 0:22:55.119 --> 0:22:59.000 That is that takes real skill. It will learn us 0:22:59.080 --> 0:23:01.680 how many pain killers the man was on at that point? 0:23:02.520 --> 0:23:07.959 Not enough? Yeah, but it his rant like the Sally 0:23:08.080 --> 0:23:12.439 Field thing. He really went on and on and about 0:23:12.520 --> 0:23:15.919 how she was just the one and he had messed 0:23:15.920 --> 0:23:21.280 it up, and it was just like it was un comfortable. 0:23:21.640 --> 0:23:24.919 This isn't therapy, Burt, but yet so funny for me 0:23:24.960 --> 0:23:27.480 because I had just sat there, look at Shawn stand 0:23:27.600 --> 0:23:29.640 there and the whole time and just go like, now 0:23:29.720 --> 0:23:33.200 you have to go talk again. He had more show 0:23:33.240 --> 0:23:35.639 to do. I wasn't in the rest of the script. 0:23:35.680 --> 0:23:38.400 That was supposed to a smart ass and that was done. Now, 0:23:39.240 --> 0:23:45.399 Oh my god, poor guy. He succeeded. Yeah, he turned out. Okay, yeah, no, 0:23:45.600 --> 0:23:48.960 it didn't kill either of our careers. What would you say, 0:23:49.080 --> 0:23:51.919 What would you say was the moral of the story? 0:23:52.080 --> 0:23:55.040 What did you take away? What did you learn from that? Oh? Know, 0:23:55.160 --> 0:24:01.040 your audience, don't bring a puppet to a knife if 0:24:01.359 --> 0:24:04.160 if it really doesn't call if the day, if evening, 0:24:04.200 --> 0:24:09.600 does it call for a really ratty, like decade old 0:24:09.680 --> 0:24:14.000 monkey puppet to stand up there smart assing while another 0:24:14.040 --> 0:24:19.360 guy is trying to deliver a speech. Don't do that. Yeah, 0:24:19.400 --> 0:24:22.480 that's your fractured fairy tale. Thank you, thank you, I mean, no, 0:24:22.600 --> 0:24:26.560 your audience. The real beauty of puppeteering, though, is that 0:24:26.560 --> 0:24:31.400 that separation between the performer and you know and the puppet. 0:24:31.640 --> 0:24:36.160 And it really is like my intro into Dad's garage 0:24:36.200 --> 0:24:41.080 theater was do a improvised soap opera every season. It's 0:24:41.119 --> 0:24:45.280 called Scandal, which is a title that has been ripped 0:24:45.320 --> 0:24:49.240 off a very successful television show. Yeah, we were doing 0:24:49.280 --> 0:24:54.040 it first, of course anyway. Uh and uh my very 0:24:54.080 --> 0:24:58.520 first season in Scandal, I played a mischievous imp from 0:24:58.520 --> 0:25:01.600 the ninth dimension called boot Boozy, the imp who had 0:25:01.680 --> 0:25:05.720 ruined the career of a Hollywood star named Chick Starley, 0:25:06.000 --> 0:25:13.359 who was based on Burns Chick Starley. Chick Starley played 0:25:13.359 --> 0:25:17.280 by the brilliant Chris Blair and Chicken Boozy were a 0:25:17.400 --> 0:25:20.439 huge hit, and I did it overtly. Boozy was like 0:25:20.840 --> 0:25:25.720 this little plastic Mikhail Gorbachoff talking like it was. For 0:25:25.760 --> 0:25:30.280 some reason in the eighties, some company thought it would 0:25:30.320 --> 0:25:34.720 be fun to make a little stuffed Michail Gorbachoff dow Yeah, 0:25:36.600 --> 0:25:43.240 with a very nice, realistic looking head. Realistic good for 0:25:43.520 --> 0:25:46.679 like a baby doll style head of Michael Go with 0:25:46.800 --> 0:25:49.359 the birth mark and everything up and I think, and 0:25:50.080 --> 0:25:53.240 a moving mouth and that was attached to like a 0:25:53.280 --> 0:25:56.879 squeeze thing in a stuffed body that for some reason 0:25:57.000 --> 0:26:01.240 was wearing like a leather biker jacket with CCCP written 0:26:01.320 --> 0:26:05.679 on the back. You know, Michael, he loved biking. But 0:26:05.800 --> 0:26:09.000 when you pushed the thing to open his mouth and 0:26:09.040 --> 0:26:14.879 make him noise, he just went huh, like what. So anyway, 0:26:14.920 --> 0:26:17.480 it dismantled that that painted it like purple and then 0:26:17.960 --> 0:26:20.800 made this weird imp character that was a huge hit. 0:26:20.880 --> 0:26:22.760 And he was a bad influence on Chick and they 0:26:22.800 --> 0:26:25.399 they just were always getting into trouble together and the 0:26:25.440 --> 0:26:27.359 audience lending. And I did it overtly. I was just 0:26:27.440 --> 0:26:29.399 out there with this thing on my arm with you know, 0:26:29.560 --> 0:26:32.560 it's body in front of me. I was I were 0:26:32.600 --> 0:26:35.160 this little diamond mask and I would just be there 0:26:35.160 --> 0:26:39.120 the entire time, and it's like the audience doesn't even 0:26:39.160 --> 0:26:42.560 know you're there. They're just like that puppets crazy. It's 0:26:42.800 --> 0:26:46.120