Speaker 1: Contrary to what you may think, respect is not earned,
Speaker 1: it's demanded.
Speaker 2: We are masters of our universe. We willingly participate in
Speaker 2: everything we experience, right because at any moment, you can
Speaker 2: tell somebody you know what I've done with this, I'm walking.
Speaker 2: We're also surrounded by some pretty incredible care pretty cool
Speaker 2: because yeah so so. I don't know if it's fair
Speaker 2: to use our life as the exactly, but I'd like
Speaker 2: to think that we're the cool Gayans.
Speaker 1: Or the guns organization. Cleanliness and good smells can really
Speaker 1: change the space and as a result, your mood or
Speaker 1: level of inspiration reach.
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh.
Speaker 1: Communications key amazing. Everybody knows how to talk to you. Guys,
Speaker 1: How the fuck do you listen? Because I've fucking failed
Speaker 1: for thirty years.
Speaker 2: I can I believe the fifth Here somebody gives you
Speaker 2: know that if you if you cry, I cry, so chill.
Speaker 1: Launch.
Speaker 2: Welcome back, everybody to in our own world. Today's episode
Speaker 2: is not just another stop on our journey. It's a
Speaker 2: celebration of someone who has been my co pilot, not
Speaker 2: just here but in life. Emily, my partner, my love,
Speaker 2: my greatest friend. This episode is all about you turning
Speaker 2: thirty is a milestone, but it's not about the number.
Speaker 2: It's about the life you've lived so far, and m
Speaker 2: the life that you've created is extraordinary. You're a brilliant musician,
Speaker 2: a fiercely kind soul, a super annimal lover, an incredible granddaughter,
Speaker 2: daughter and postisa granddaughter, and the person who fills every
Speaker 2: space you enter with light and laughter for almost because
Speaker 2: we're not quite there. Next week we will be, but
Speaker 2: we're not quite there. For almost eight years, I've been
Speaker 2: lucky enough to walk alongside you, to see every beautiful, messy,
Speaker 2: raw and incredible part of who you are. So today
Speaker 2: we're not just celebrating your thirtieth birthday. We're celebrating the
Speaker 2: incredible you, everything you've been, everything you are, and everything
Speaker 2: I know you'll become. I love you, baby, Happy thirty,
Speaker 2: and thank you for being you. She's crying already.
Speaker 1: Give her a second, give her a second, too much,
Speaker 1: And I'm.
Speaker 2: So happy to say I'm the first person who said
Speaker 2: happy thirty.
Speaker 1: Thank you, ah too much?
Speaker 2: How do you feel.
Speaker 1: Overwhelmed? You know, interested in how humans fixate congratulating ourselves
Speaker 1: with another year, but very happy, thank you?
Speaker 2: A little bit sad Okay, we're going to talk about it,
Speaker 2: really somebody, because you know that if you if you cry,
Speaker 2: I cry, so chill.
Speaker 1: All right, Well, either way, I'm going to change the
Speaker 1: subject because the point is that thank you for that
Speaker 1: amazing intro. My god, somebody.
Speaker 2: Else, it's okay, I think this is what happens when
Speaker 2: you turn thirty.
Speaker 1: It's too much somebody else, so for real, Oh my god,
Speaker 1: I have an actual tear.
Speaker 2: No, there's no, there's like five It's okay. That's good.
Speaker 2: Maybe you're doing great.
Speaker 1: I'm also very old.
Speaker 2: Okay, why don't you wait, hold on, don't push past it.
Speaker 2: Why don't you talk us through what you're feeling right now?
Speaker 1: I felt it when I was twenty five, just like age,
Speaker 1: you know coming upon you. I don't know, because I
Speaker 1: always feel very young.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean you are no, no.
Speaker 1: Like in spirit and like in the way that I act,
Speaker 1: But I feel the the years coming. So don't take
Speaker 1: it for granted. You know, if you're twenty one, twenty two, whatever,
Speaker 1: like you know, you're growing, but you're still so young,
Speaker 1: like you know, understand that and take that moment and stride,
Speaker 1: learn to grow. And speaking of today, it is my
Speaker 1: fucking birthday, So I'm taking over. So Gem knows that
Speaker 1: I am riding my bike more often, which is something
Speaker 1: that I really know that it's a value to what
Speaker 1: I need to be as a human being, like moving
Speaker 1: my body, being more in tune with exercise and things
Speaker 1: like that is something that is very valuable to me.
Speaker 1: Speaking of which she inspired me to come with you
Speaker 1: guys today with a list of so far thirty things
Speaker 1: I have learned in my thirty years. What do you think.
Speaker 1: There's a lot of things that we learn as the
Speaker 1: years go by, and I'm thirty, but there are way
Speaker 1: more than thirty things that I have learned in my
Speaker 1: time on earth so far. But what I encourage everybody
Speaker 1: to learn is the first thirty things that come to mind.
Speaker 1: And like I mentioned about riding bike when I went
Speaker 1: on my bike this morning, which is something that I
Speaker 1: do often and Gem supports me with anyway, the point
Speaker 1: is that I have there are a lot of things
Speaker 1: that you learn when you get a little bit older.
Speaker 1: And I'm not old yet, I'm only thirty, but on
Speaker 1: the way there the things that stick in your mind
Speaker 1: the most. Like for example, this morning, I told Jim, well,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna get on my bike. I'm gonna see what
Speaker 1: comes to my head first, and that's what I want
Speaker 1: to share with you guys today. So, in an effort
Speaker 1: of time, happy thirtieth birthday to me, and welcome to
Speaker 1: thirty things that M has to share with you so
Speaker 1: far on her thirtieth year on the planet. Welcome, thank you.
Speaker 1: I'm excited anyway. So let's start with number one in
Speaker 1: order of importance. It's always better to be behind the
Speaker 1: beat as a drummer, I know what you mean exactly.
Speaker 1: This is my number one for a reason. As any
Speaker 1: kind of musician, or whether you're recording or playing in
Speaker 1: a band or anything like that, if you have an option.
Speaker 1: When you're playing right, you get excited. Inherently, you're always
Speaker 1: playing like faster right. It's always better to be behind
Speaker 1: the beat than ahead of it. So like a non.
Speaker 2: Musician version of that, or worse, lay back, lay back.
Speaker 1: It's always better to be behind everybody than I had
Speaker 1: just lay back in a beat. Like if the tempo
Speaker 1: is king, King, King, King, it's better to bear, it's
Speaker 1: better to be behind it than ahead of it. It's
Speaker 1: always better to be behind the beat. It's more swaggy
Speaker 1: everything you do in life. Love that all right. Number two,
Speaker 1: animals may not speak but have more important things to
Speaker 1: say than humans.
Speaker 2: I really feel that way. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I feel like we often are looking for animals to
Speaker 1: speak a language that we understand, but they have more
Speaker 1: to say inherently in the way that they act and
Speaker 1: the way that they move. That means a lot more
Speaker 1: to us humans than a language.
Speaker 2: I wish we could hear what they have to say
Speaker 2: for sure.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but we feel it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I know. I sometimes I'm like, uh, if it
Speaker 2: could read your mind, But but yeah, I love.
Speaker 1: Okay. Next number three, it's not only okay to change,
Speaker 1: it's important to I was always afraid of changing. Actually
Speaker 1: that's kind of what we're here to do, so change.
Speaker 1: Any comment on that, baby, Yeah, but there was a
Speaker 1: saying that my mom used to say a lot when
Speaker 1: we were kids. With change comes gross. I don't think
Speaker 1: that if you come on this planet and you stayed
Speaker 1: exactly the same, you're doing what we You're making the
Speaker 1: best of it, exactly, okay. Number four, Contrary to what
Speaker 1: you may think, respect is not earned, it's demanded. You
Speaker 1: don't earn respect, like I'm sorry, girl, Like if you
Speaker 1: expect somebody to come around and be like, I see,
Speaker 1: I respect you just because you earned it. There's no
Speaker 1: kind of respect that's earned. It's something that inherently as
Speaker 1: a human being, you have to make sure that people
Speaker 1: respect around. Respect is like a boundary, I think, right,
Speaker 1: But there's like a saying that's like, oh, respectors earned. Like, no, girl,
Speaker 1: you have to make sure that people are respecting you. Yeah, exactly,
Speaker 1: all right. Next, this one's really kind of sad, but
Speaker 1: it's true.
Speaker 2: My thirty thirties, you've started this episode crying.
Speaker 1: I'd like to remind you, Oh you think I forgot
Speaker 1: I think so. No, I didn't. You could lose anybody
Speaker 1: or anything at any moment. Yeah, that's one of my
Speaker 1: big ones. They're like, oh, you know you're a widows,
Speaker 1: this that you know you're like expecting loss. No, girl,
Speaker 1: you're gonna wake up tomorrow, you're gonna get a call,
Speaker 1: and you lost a really close person in you.
Speaker 2: Also, it doesn't even matter how much you prepare for
Speaker 2: the loss. I think that no amount.
Speaker 1: Of preparation truly prepares you right at all for the
Speaker 1: person for the situation.
Speaker 2: Yeah, humans, I don't I don't care how many years
Speaker 2: you're on the planet. I don't think that it gets
Speaker 2: any easier.
Speaker 1: It doesn't at all. Well, there you go a little dark.
Speaker 1: But that's my number five. Okay, number six. Gem has
Speaker 1: really helped me with this one. There are a couple
Speaker 1: on the list that GEM has really helped with.
Speaker 2: I'm honored.
Speaker 1: Okay, what you put in your body is actually fucking important.
Speaker 1: Read ingredients. That's my part A for six. I have
Speaker 1: part A and part B. Okakay. Part A is what
Speaker 1: you put in your body is actually fucking portant. Read
Speaker 1: the ingredients. And part B is if you don't buy
Speaker 1: it and take it home, you won't eat it.
Speaker 2: Oh my god.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a big one, GEM.
Speaker 2: Remember that. Oh my god. Here's what's been happening lately. Right,
Speaker 2: We'll have like rehearsals for the musicians, and then I'll
Speaker 2: buy these mini cokes for them because I know I
Speaker 2: all love co Cola, and then like twenty will be
Speaker 2: left arm Like I guess I have to drink them exactly.
Speaker 1: Oh, if you don't buy won't don't buy it, don't
Speaker 1: take it to your house, Okay, and also really value
Speaker 1: what you put in your body. You taught me that
Speaker 1: a lot Before I met Gem, I wasn't a vegan,
Speaker 1: which doesn't necessarily have to do with the health of
Speaker 1: your diet. Vegan, very unhealthy vegan, which which I hope
Speaker 1: to change this year and in my thirtieth year and
Speaker 1: in this new year, to give more intention into what
Speaker 1: actually I put into my body. Yes, verse, you know,
Speaker 1: just being a vegan diet, like, it's very different, very different.
Speaker 1: I can't wait, all right, next, you're ready, I'm ready.
Speaker 1: You're gonna believe this. Fun is underrated. Fun is so rated. Yes,
Speaker 1: I think you have to have fun at every moment
Speaker 1: you have, and I get in trouble for it all
Speaker 1: the time. And maybe sometimes I have fun when I shouldn't.
Speaker 1: But it's much better to do that than be fucking
Speaker 1: pissed if we could die at any moment, which is
Speaker 1: one of the things that I've learned. Fun is underrated.
Speaker 1: Like stop feeling so weird about laughing and feeling good
Speaker 1: and I don't know, liking things that you feel like
Speaker 1: you shouldn't like. Sometimes I feel about that, like, oh well,
Speaker 1: people are like they're doing their accountant job every day
Speaker 1: and they might be like having a wayward d about
Speaker 1: wicked or something you know, and it's like.
Speaker 2: We were thought about anything anything else.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know. Phone is underrated? Yeah, okay, next ready,
Speaker 1: I'm proud of this one. If communication is key, listening
Speaker 1: is the door. So people always say, oh, communication is love,
Speaker 1: communication is key, communication is key. Amazing, everybody knows how
Speaker 1: to talk to you, guys, How the fuck do you listen?
Speaker 1: Because I've fucking failed for thirty years?
Speaker 2: I can I leave the fifth here?
Speaker 1: No, you can be honest.
Speaker 2: It's my thirty it's your thirtieth birthday special, and this
Speaker 2: is about what you've learned. And I think that I've
Speaker 2: become a better listener in your process of listening.
Speaker 1: Wow, well we've both been learning. But that's also what
Speaker 1: love is. What we'll get to on probably twelve thirteen.
Speaker 1: But anyway, Yes, if communication is key, listening is the door. Listen, listen, listen,
Speaker 1: And to quote Quincy, my amazing godfather, who said, if
Speaker 1: God gave you two ears, it means that you need
Speaker 1: to listen twice as much as you speak. So please, everybody,
Speaker 1: let's shut the fuck Honestly, that's what I've learned. If
Speaker 1: I have something to learn, shut the fuck up, all right? Next?
Speaker 2: Right, you said after everyone like, did I get unready
Speaker 2: between the last te.
Speaker 1: I think you did?
Speaker 3: All right?
Speaker 1: Jim knows this about me. And this was imparted to
Speaker 1: me by my mother. Thank you, mom, and I thank
Speaker 1: you for this teaching because I really feel it. Boredom
Speaker 1: does not exist. Boredom does not exist. If you have
Speaker 1: a brain in your head, you best not turn to
Speaker 1: your parents and say I am bored. Go draw, go, think, go, write,
Speaker 1: go create. Maybe that's a weird thing to think of
Speaker 1: as a creative. I don't know how you feel about that.
Speaker 2: I think my grandfather used to tell me this thing.
Speaker 2: When I would stay at their house. I'd be like, ah,
Speaker 2: WELLO read that. He'd be like, I see man, mind
Speaker 2: you garla, Yeah, I don't do you very well?
Speaker 1: Well that's another way, and I would not talk to
Speaker 1: him about that.
Speaker 2: I'd be like, all right, message received, I should shut
Speaker 2: up and final way.
Speaker 1: That's the right message. But the learning is you have
Speaker 1: a brain in your head, create, draw, think, write something down.
Speaker 1: I don't know not even I don't think. I don't
Speaker 1: even think you have to take an action. I think
Speaker 1: you just go outside and watch nature. I think you
Speaker 1: learn a lot just by watching nature.
Speaker 2: Do its thing. A leaf turned bird comes to the tree,
Speaker 2: and what does it grab? What does it pick from?
Speaker 2: How long is it there? How does a bird open
Speaker 2: its mouth when it makes it sounds? You know, like,
Speaker 2: there's just so much you can learn just by.
Speaker 1: Looking around you and being plugged in being present, present exactly,
Speaker 1: which is a lot of the things that we disconnect
Speaker 1: from these days because of all the distractions we have,
Speaker 1: you know, yeahstly, Okay, next, I'm not going to ask
Speaker 1: you if you're ready, because I already know how you
Speaker 1: feel about that, Okay. People who create art speak their
Speaker 1: own language, like artists speak their own language. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: think so.
Speaker 2: I think that I think artists are a very someone
Speaker 2: I don't know, someone that I came across on the
Speaker 2: internet said something that artists tend to be the deepest
Speaker 2: feelers because we process emotions maybe at a different intensity
Speaker 2: than the people around us, which is why we have
Speaker 2: to like do something with those emotions. Yeah, and I
Speaker 2: think that that kind of makes us like a certain
Speaker 2: kind of just a certain kind of person, you know,
Speaker 2: I just feeling a lot of things all the time.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Well, I don't know. Over the years, I've learned,
Speaker 1: even through we've talked about it, like dating people who
Speaker 1: maybe are maybe not that artistic, or maybe, in my case,
Speaker 1: like dating people who inherently are are are artistic, but
Speaker 1: are maybe not my sexual preference.
Speaker 2: You know, that's a turn.
Speaker 1: But we've talked about Okay, it's my thirtieth birthday special,
Speaker 1: I can't be real.
Speaker 2: No, please be real, Please be really? What is the
Speaker 2: What does the sexual preference have to do with the artists?
Speaker 1: I'm saying that inherently as a person, as a soul,
Speaker 1: I'm more connected to people who are artistic or can
Speaker 1: speak my language versus what their gender or their genitalia pursue.
Speaker 1: Which is why I feel like I can honestly say, well,
Speaker 1: I'm attracted to the person and not their gender because
Speaker 1: I feel like I speak the language of art more
Speaker 1: than the language of gender. You know, No, you're gay
Speaker 1: as fuck.
Speaker 2: Fix that. No, it's it's just poetic.
Speaker 1: Skincare is important, important, skin care is important. Moisturized moisture.
Speaker 2: Is this like things I've learned as a white basic thing?
Speaker 2: Is this things I've learned in the last thirty years
Speaker 2: or things that I'm going to start applying because I
Speaker 2: haven't done them.
Speaker 1: Oh that's not fair, just fair. I've been, like, you know,
Speaker 1: vehemently applying them little by little as we go once
Speaker 1: a week, you know, once every three weeks. Doesn't know.
Speaker 1: One can't preach them. I do moisturize, not as much
Speaker 1: as I should, but I have been moisturizing.
Speaker 2: I'm proud of you for your However, often.
Speaker 1: He's my next one. Clearly it's on the line of
Speaker 1: what you would be talking about. Being soft doesn't make
Speaker 1: you weak. Playing the victim does. That's me. I am
Speaker 1: the first person to be like, Okay, maybe you need
Speaker 1: to be a little bit softer and the way you
Speaker 1: interpret things or the way you receive things in life,
Speaker 1: but that's not the tea. What makes you weaken life
Speaker 1: is putting yourself in the perspective of the victim or
Speaker 1: somebody who can't be approached or can't be resolved. Like,
Speaker 1: that's not the vibe. You need to open yourself to
Speaker 1: the situation. And for me personally, it's a very comfortable
Speaker 1: place to keep going into. Oh, these people are attacking me,
Speaker 1: you know, they're saying this about me, this that, Oh
Speaker 1: this hurts me. No, girl, get out of that perspective.
Speaker 2: That is not I mean, there's a way to hold
Speaker 2: there's a place and a time for holding space for
Speaker 2: the way that you feel. I'll get there shifting. You're funny,
Speaker 2: but I do think that there's value. And you find
Speaker 2: that you're the kind of person who in every story
Speaker 2: you tell you are always the victim, and it's always
Speaker 2: what's happening to me, and this person did this to me,
Speaker 2: and you don't take a beat and consider, First of all,
Speaker 2: everybody thinks they're the victim in their own story. But
Speaker 2: even if you take yourself out of that mentality and
Speaker 2: you say, okay, we are masters of our universe, we
Speaker 2: willingly participate in everything we experience, right, Because at any moment,
Speaker 2: you can tell somebody, you know, what I've done with this,
Speaker 2: I'm walking I'm walking away, whether it's a conversation, whether
Speaker 2: it's an experience, or like you know, an actual thing
Speaker 2: that's occurring. So if you allow yourself to slip into
Speaker 2: the pattern of like, this is this is happening to me?
Speaker 2: Not maybe I co created this experience, Right, that's I
Speaker 2: think what you mean, that's.
Speaker 1: The victim experience I'm talking about, Like, yeah, realizing that
Speaker 1: the human experience is one that inherently in the dynamic
Speaker 1: of relationships. You're always trying to place yourself as the
Speaker 1: one who's not you know, like doing.
Speaker 2: This, I feel valid herd you feel validain.
Speaker 1: But that's not the vibe. And I'll get there because
Speaker 1: one of.
Speaker 2: The onest episod be called what's the vibe?
Speaker 1: Okay, next, are you ready?
Speaker 2: Oh my god, I'm going to really just have a
Speaker 2: hard time here. If that's you start every one?
Speaker 1: Okay. Emotions are real, but they often whisper lies to
Speaker 1: the soul. So yeah, what you feel may be really
Speaker 1: heavy and real and real. Your feelings are sensors, but
Speaker 1: they may be informing you of something that you don't
Speaker 1: want to apply to your life. And the way that
Speaker 1: it feels like sometimes I feel like like so hurt,
Speaker 1: so hard, so this, and it's like, take a breath.
Speaker 1: Apply your feelings to you? Does that make sense? No?
Speaker 2: What do you mean to apply your feelings to you?
Speaker 1: Separate your emotions and your feelings from who you are,
Speaker 1: and have that conversation with yourself. Not to immediately validate
Speaker 1: your feelings, but to place them where they belong. Yeah,
Speaker 1: which are not often where they speak to you from.
Speaker 1: That's what I meant. Your feelings are often liars. So
Speaker 1: place them where they belong, talk to them, learn them.
Speaker 1: You know, emotions are we real, but they tell you
Speaker 1: fucking lies. I'm telling you to tell you lies. All right. Next, Fear.
Speaker 1: We're on fourteen by the way, eel's halfway there. Fear
Speaker 1: itself will take away all you are afraid to lose.
Speaker 2: Some of these are poetic.
Speaker 1: I'm telling you I thought about them. Wow my bike ride.
Speaker 2: Repeat that one.
Speaker 1: Fear itself will take away all you are afraid to lose.
Speaker 1: So in the moments you spend being afraid, the moments
Speaker 1: you spend fearing what will happen right there, it's going
Speaker 1: to eliminate the possibility of that happening. Stop being afraid,
Speaker 1: Jump into it. Fear is the opposite of love, is
Speaker 1: the opposite of success, is the opposite of creativity. Fear
Speaker 1: is gnarly. And I'm thirty and I'm still afraid. But
Speaker 1: at least I see it. Yeah, we're getting there. You know,
Speaker 1: we'll see it at forty all right. Next, speaking a
Speaker 1: second language is a gift.
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, yes, speaking a second language is a gift.
Speaker 1: Right.
Speaker 2: I feel super lucky. I feel so lucky, not just
Speaker 2: not just to speak it but to understand it and
Speaker 2: to read it and to be able to consume culture
Speaker 2: through this other language.
Speaker 1: I love it. I know me too. Thank you, Thank you,
Speaker 1: Mom and Dad, thank you everybody, everybody.
Speaker 2: Miami, the city of Thank you to the City of
Speaker 2: Miami for making my Spanish the unofficial first.
Speaker 1: Okay, this one I attribute to you. Literally, I haven't.
Speaker 2: There's a couple there already that I'm like, I wonder
Speaker 2: where she got that thing.
Speaker 1: No, but this one says this has parentheses. Travel like
Speaker 1: a local. Thanks Jem. Jem has taught me, you know,
Speaker 1: hashtag nepple baby. I've traveled the world, you know, on
Speaker 1: tour with my mom's traveled. I've traveled on my mom
Speaker 1: and like doing all this stuff. And when I started
Speaker 1: traveling with Gem, She's like, let's travel like a local.
Speaker 1: Talk to local people and go to the restaurants they go,
Speaker 1: ask inquisitive questions. That's the way you see a country,
Speaker 1: and the way that you see a country is the
Speaker 1: way you see the world. And that's very valuable. So
Speaker 1: if you have the option to travel, travel like.
Speaker 2: A look, I love it.
Speaker 1: All right next the world, Oh, this is the love
Speaker 1: question that I was referencing the world depicts and romanticizes
Speaker 1: selfish love. True love is a selfless choice. So we're
Speaker 1: watching rom coms, We're watching all these crazy movies and
Speaker 1: love stories and things that were romanticize the perfect kiss,
Speaker 1: the perfect loss of your virginity, which never goes that way.
Speaker 1: It's like, I don't know mine was.
Speaker 2: I'm at least proud to say that i lost my
Speaker 2: virgin oa you were in love with the person, not
Speaker 2: I know. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I am always one
Speaker 2: of the lucky ones.
Speaker 1: That's great. But my point is, you know, like, you know,
Speaker 1: like you need to realize that in this world, the
Speaker 1: way that we are showing love and fed love even
Speaker 1: in movies, yeah, you know, it is something that's unattainable.
Speaker 1: And I feel like sometimes we have this kind of
Speaker 1: like I don't know, like rubric for how we need
Speaker 1: to fall in love and romance and oh you need
Speaker 1: to feel this way and feel that way and whatever.
Speaker 1: It's not like that love is actually a selfless thing.
Speaker 1: In movies, it's like, oh, this person makes me better?
Speaker 1: Does he love me? Does she love me? Does this? No?
Speaker 2: What can this person do for me?
Speaker 1: Exactly?
Speaker 2: It's not like that.
Speaker 1: It's like I have my life, my world. I know
Speaker 1: who I am. I love myself and now I'm ready
Speaker 1: to bring you into that. And to be honest, when
Speaker 1: Gem and I met, that wasn't the case. No, I
Speaker 1: was almost the worst version of myself. No, I will
Speaker 1: say that, baby, But that's okay because the fact that
Speaker 1: I can say that I'm thirty and I've grown and
Speaker 1: learned with you by my side, I'm so glad that
Speaker 1: I got to do it with you then without you,
Speaker 1: And I think that that's why inherently I say it's
Speaker 1: a selfless choice, because the same way that I know
Speaker 1: that you've put up with my shit and my weirdness
Speaker 1: and everything that I've gone through, I've put up with
Speaker 1: your shit and your weirdness and your whatever. And as
Speaker 1: a result, were here almost ten years.
Speaker 2: Girl, chill, it's not even eight you or that she
Speaker 2: trying to give me another two years?
Speaker 1: No, next ten years.
Speaker 2: I'm thirty two.
Speaker 1: Clearly I try to make no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Speaker 2: Ten years a girl? Eight years? Oh years.
Speaker 1: It's amazing how many times a savory your salty dish
Speaker 1: needs a pinc of sugar.
Speaker 2: A pinch of sugar. I thought you were gonna say salt.
Speaker 1: I just said, it's amazing how many times a savory.
Speaker 2: Or salt dishgar Oh yes, Oh, you're you're thinking about
Speaker 2: my free holdless, aren't you.
Speaker 1: First of all, you should tell people that. Why because
Speaker 1: that's a thing.
Speaker 2: Oh oh right, right, pretend you heard that.
Speaker 1: But yours more metaphorical, because it's true. Like I'm not
Speaker 1: the best cook in the world. You're pretty good, but
Speaker 1: it's hilarious when I do cook, I taste my food
Speaker 1: and often literally a pinch of sugar is literally what
Speaker 1: it needs. I'm talking about a pinch, and then I'm like,
Speaker 1: that's life. Just put a pinch of sugar on everything.
Speaker 1: Be sweeter, be nicer, Just bring more sweetness everywhere you go,
Speaker 1: even the saltiest of dishes. Need it? Trust me, that
Speaker 1: pasta that you love that I make? Huh how much
Speaker 1: sugar you think of putting it?
Speaker 2: Okay, I don't know, but now you're worrying me.
Speaker 1: A pinch of sugar. Sugar, there you go. You taught
Speaker 1: me that.
Speaker 2: I know, but I never put it on pasta. But yeah, sauces.
Speaker 1: Yeah, all right, next, okay, truly cherish your time with
Speaker 1: your family. Put your phone down, put your phone down
Speaker 1: and cherish your time with your family, put it away,
Speaker 1: put your phone down and really be present. Present is
Speaker 1: whether it be your family, your friends obviously, which might
Speaker 1: with my family. I can say that with more confidence
Speaker 1: because I know that I've had moments where now that
Speaker 1: my Grandma's not here or people in my life that
Speaker 1: are not here. You know, I say, wow, I remember,
Speaker 1: I like zone in to those moments. I was present,
Speaker 1: but I feel like I would have been more zoned in.
Speaker 1: So just now that I know that technology is even
Speaker 1: more ahead of us and everything, just like, put your
Speaker 1: phone down, be present. Yeah, all right, next, Okay, this
Speaker 1: is a good one, and especially because we have a
Speaker 1: lot of friends now which you can speak a lot
Speaker 1: on this. Now, having the opportunity to watch or teach
Speaker 1: a child is a powerful responsible ability and an opportunity
Speaker 1: and also an opportunity to learn. Being around children is amazing.
Speaker 1: And I want to hear Jem's take on this because
Speaker 1: we have a lot of friends through her who have kids.
Speaker 2: And my take is no different from yours. I feel
Speaker 2: really lucky for the kids that are in our life, lives,
Speaker 2: in our life, and our joint life. Yeah, we're also
Speaker 2: surrounded by some pretty incredible kids.
Speaker 1: Pretty coolah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, So I don't know if it's fair to use
Speaker 2: our life as the exactly, but I'd like to think
Speaker 2: that we're the cool gay.
Speaker 1: Ants were the guns. Okay, don't talk shit. If you
Speaker 1: really want to help somebody, say it to their face
Speaker 1: or keep it to yourself, you.
Speaker 2: Know I feel about that. Yeah, you don't need my
Speaker 2: take on that. I grew up in a family that is,
Speaker 2: like all is not any more or less dysfunctional than
Speaker 2: your average family, and our personal brand of crazy is
Speaker 2: we just say everything, which is at times pure disrespect,
Speaker 2: but I will say at least at least and I've
Speaker 2: learned to really appreciate this over the last few years.
Speaker 2: There's no guessing with my family. We just say how
Speaker 2: we feel, say how we feel, and express it, and
Speaker 2: we don't play games or talk, you know, behind each
Speaker 2: other's back. I'm a big fan of just saying it.
Speaker 2: I don't go to bed with like unset things in
Speaker 2: my chest. It doesn't feel good.
Speaker 1: Yeah, often times that you don't want to hear those
Speaker 1: offset things.
Speaker 2: But yeah, listen, I'm working a lot on my delivery.
Speaker 2: I'm working a lot on my delivery because none of
Speaker 2: the things that I say are untrue. They just could
Speaker 2: be said in a better way.
Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, speaking of next and this one, I really
Speaker 1: feel what we're almost there at the age were how
Speaker 1: do you guys feel?
Speaker 4: Though?
Speaker 1: It's pretty good?
Speaker 4: Right?
Speaker 2: These are good?
Speaker 1: These are good. There's a few great things for real. Okay, lop, oh,
Speaker 1: you're gonna love this one.
Speaker 2: I love them all.
Speaker 1: I love you, I love you, thank you, Okay, next,
Speaker 1: thank you?
Speaker 2: Okay, I can't wait for this one.
Speaker 1: Almost I'm ready. Yeah, I'm sure you are enter here. Okay.
Speaker 1: Laughter really is an amazing medicine, and medicine can often
Speaker 1: be poison. Wow.
Speaker 2: Okay, Yes, laughter really is amazing medicine, specifically because your
Speaker 2: body can't tell the difference between reality and fictions. If
Speaker 2: you smile, it thinks you're happy.
Speaker 1: Well maybe that's actually the biology of your body giving
Speaker 1: you the hormones and nuance that you need to be
Speaker 1: able to be happy in this fucked up world.
Speaker 2: But yeah, that's what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: Yeah, No, that's exactly what I'm saying. Okay. But also I.
Speaker 2: Agree with you one hundred medicine is poison.
Speaker 1: I said often. I said, laughter really is an amazing medicine.
Speaker 1: Laughter is underrated, but medicine.
Speaker 5: Is overrated, like medicine, Western medicine, prescription chemicals, got it,
Speaker 5: prescription chemical by the way, alcohol, which I is not
Speaker 5: almost included included.
Speaker 1: No, I'm saying, like things that are readily available, available
Speaker 1: to us, or like sold to us, like medicine, like alcohol.
Speaker 1: Like the things that people sell to us are often horrible. Yeah, horrible, horrible, horrible.
Speaker 1: But laughter, laughter is an amazing medicine, it is. Okay,
Speaker 1: we're in the home stretch, so we're gonna take a
Speaker 1: little break and then we're gonna do our last five.
Speaker 1: Oh okay, we'll go back. So we are going to
Speaker 1: finish up my thirty thirtieth thirties, thirties thirties.
Speaker 2: How do you feel I feel like this is an
Speaker 2: amazing collection and you should publish it.
Speaker 1: Okay, great, So moving forward, speaking of an amazing collection,
Speaker 1: We're gonna round this out. Mental health is just as
Speaker 1: important as physical health. Oh boy. What sucks is that
Speaker 1: a lot of people don't have access to the same care.
Speaker 1: In those two things are the money or just to have.
Speaker 1: So that's what I'm saying, Like most of the world
Speaker 1: doesn't have health care but to the lucky ones who
Speaker 1: do they have access to medical health care, mental health
Speaker 1: care should be just as accessible. It's just as important.
Speaker 2: I'm fucked up, okay.
Speaker 1: And because I'm being serious, I'm thirty, bitch. And because
Speaker 1: I have the money and the resources and the connections,
Speaker 1: I'm able to say, yeah, I can go to therapy
Speaker 1: every week if I want to. What if you can't, right,
Speaker 1: what if you don't you just can't? That sucks.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean that's most people's experience.
Speaker 1: But mental health is just as important as physical health. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and that's where that whole thing happens. But anyway, for sure,
Speaker 1: what numbersis Wow, I feel like, are you skipping some No?
Speaker 2: Okay, okay, because I don't know how are we moving
Speaker 2: through them?
Speaker 1: I'm just dancing through love. I'm dead, okay, all right?
Speaker 1: Twenty five Speaking of singing, singing is about storytelling and connecting,
Speaker 1: not hitting high notes and doing runs.
Speaker 3: Oh hold on, one.
Speaker 2: More time for the singers.
Speaker 1: TikTok, Cynthia, I love it.
Speaker 2: Oh my god. Yes, I'm so tired of singing that
Speaker 2: the singing that's become like a sport of who can
Speaker 2: do what?
Speaker 3: But I'm feeling nothing.
Speaker 1: Yeah, straight up, thank you. Thinking it is about connecting.
Speaker 1: Thank you and thank you Cynthia. Hashtag wiged okay big
Speaker 1: next you swear they're paying you twenty six. If your
Speaker 1: grandparents slash parents are still around, film them telling stories. Wow,
Speaker 1: film them? Told me that telling stories. I told you that, right,
Speaker 1: you tell me that all the time. Put camera on
Speaker 1: in front of the people that you love that are
Speaker 1: going to be gone soon, and film them. I know
Speaker 1: my grandma's gone. I miss her every day. I have not,
Speaker 1: which I didn't have enough room on these cards to
Speaker 1: say how I haven't dealt with grief. Preach but it's
Speaker 1: not okay because I haven't dealt with grief. And one
Speaker 1: of the things is that I'm luckily enough, lucky enough
Speaker 1: to say that I had an opportunity to use the
Speaker 1: media and things that we have these days to capture
Speaker 1: something special about that moment that I had with my grandma.
Speaker 1: So if you're lucky to have your parents and your
Speaker 1: grandparents around, put a camera on film them. Yeah, just
Speaker 1: trust me, it's going to be so much more valuable
Speaker 1: than your tiktoks and your all those other things just
Speaker 1: to do.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's so true. And you remind me all the time,
Speaker 2: So do it.
Speaker 1: Thank you for the camera on. All right, we're almost done.
Speaker 1: Here we go, Yeah, yeah, okay, they're great. Organization, cleanliness
Speaker 1: and good smells can really change the space and as
Speaker 1: a result, your mood or level of inspiration. Oh my gosh.
Speaker 2: You know, as somebody who used to find comfort in
Speaker 2: a messy space, I think that the items around me
Speaker 2: occupying space made me feel like safe. But now I'm
Speaker 2: somebody who like the more organized the spaces, the better
Speaker 2: leader it is. Oh, it's just about energy, having room
Speaker 2: to move in, you know.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and also even the process of doing so.
Speaker 2: It's just oh, I love Yeah. Cleaning as a therapy
Speaker 2: is like great tool.
Speaker 1: Clean your places, organize your places.
Speaker 2: I hope you take that one with you home today.
Speaker 1: And as a follow up, repetition is the answer you've
Speaker 1: been looking for, just saying. If you're saying, oh, why
Speaker 1: can't I do this? Why is it my body changing?
Speaker 1: Why is it my voice changing? Why isn't my proficiency
Speaker 1: on my instrument changing? The answer is repetition. Period, That's it.
Speaker 1: Do it every day, do it every day. You'll get better.
Speaker 2: Yeah, trust me.
Speaker 1: Repetition is the answer you've been looking for. All right,
Speaker 1: we're on our last two, babe. Oh no, are you ready?
Speaker 1: Oh my god, No, that was a joke, all right,
Speaker 1: second to last. Embarrassment is just as overrated and dangerous
Speaker 1: as boredom.
Speaker 2: And explain that one.
Speaker 1: Well, Boredom doesn't exist. Boredom is completely overrated. If you
Speaker 1: have a brain in your head, you can definitely find
Speaker 1: something to do with it, find something to occupy your
Speaker 1: time with. Uh huh, touch nature, embarrassment, write something I'm
Speaker 1: not saying the connection, Okay. Embarrassment is an emotion that
Speaker 1: we as people, especially me. I've lived a lot of
Speaker 1: my life up till now. You said thirty until thirty, right,
Speaker 1: this is one of my biggest ones. I spent a
Speaker 1: lot of my life limiting myself because of embarrassment. Don't sing,
Speaker 1: don't sing because it's embarrassing, you know, give your guitar
Speaker 1: to the guy because he's asking for it.
Speaker 4: You know.
Speaker 1: Like I always felt like I was like lesser than
Speaker 1: or like embarrassed, or like felt weird about just like
Speaker 1: I don't know acting, for example, the small experience I've
Speaker 1: had with acting, like you have to kind of embarrass yourself,
Speaker 1: like that feeling that we associate with embarrassing ourselves is
Speaker 1: actually just exploring, you know, like when you see my
Speaker 1: last one, you're gonna understand why that was my second time, right,
Speaker 1: Because this is really what I feel in my thirty
Speaker 1: years on this planet, which I have so much more
Speaker 1: to learn and so much more to go. But the
Speaker 1: one overarching thing that I feel like runs through everything
Speaker 1: is be yourself. Because there's only one you, So why
Speaker 1: the fuck would you want to play anybody else?
Speaker 2: Yes, Like.
Speaker 1: There is there's only one you, and I'm fucked up
Speaker 1: and I'm weird, and I have so much to learn,
Speaker 1: but like, I don't want to be another role right now,
Speaker 1: Like I want to be me, Like be yourself, yeah,
Speaker 1: you know, as shitty as she is, as weird as
Speaker 1: she is, as much as she has to learn.
Speaker 2: Like just do it shitty, not the way that I
Speaker 2: would describe yourself.
Speaker 1: You know what I mean, as much as she has
Speaker 1: to learn, be you, Yeah, because there's nobody else, and
Speaker 1: hopefully at some point somebody will pay you to play
Speaker 1: somebody else.
Speaker 2: What these left turns? I feel like I'm on a
Speaker 2: NASCAR racetrack.
Speaker 1: So those are my thirty things that I've learned in
Speaker 1: my thirty so far, and by the way, the most
Speaker 1: imminent ones, because obviously I have a million more things
Speaker 1: that I could sit here and prophesize about, but these
Speaker 1: are the things that were most important to me.
Speaker 2: Love that well, I'm honored that you have shared these
Speaker 2: thirty things with me. I'll take credit for a couple
Speaker 2: of those things that I heard you say, yes, But
Speaker 2: I feel like I've learned just sitting here some of
Speaker 2: the things that you said that I'll be I'll be
Speaker 2: taking with me into the next year. I think that
Speaker 2: you've lived thirty beautiful years on this planet. Any soul,
Speaker 2: human or otherwise that has been fortunate enough to cross
Speaker 2: paths with yours in the last thirty years should call
Speaker 2: themselves by that name, because they really are fortunate to
Speaker 2: have met you. You are absolutely one of a kind.
Speaker 2: Maybe there are people like other people on the planet,
Speaker 2: but I can bet all the money in all the
Speaker 2: world that there is nobody like you.
Speaker 1: Am.
Speaker 2: It wouldn't be your birthday without a girl and a
Speaker 2: have feverth dude.
Speaker 6: Happy birthdaybird, happy will learn the happy birthday baby.
Speaker 1: Hold on, hold the baby. I gotta make a real,
Speaker 1: real fat wish hold Okay, it includes you don't worry, okay,
Speaker 1: fake blow up?
Speaker 3: Yeah, drop the cake. Yeah, wha, thank you baby, Happy birthday.
Speaker 1: Babe. Doesn't want to kiss me right now, but that's okay.
Speaker 1: I do, I do.
Speaker 2: I wouldn't have kissed you if I didn't want to,
Speaker 2: you know, be better than that.
Speaker 1: There you go, the the origin of love. Oh these
Speaker 1: people don't know how to wake everybody. If there's a
Speaker 1: thirtieth birthday gift you can give me, go headwig and
Speaker 1: the angry. All right, Hey, thank you for listening me.
Speaker 1: Thank you for listening to me, Thank you for listening
Speaker 1: to me, Thank you for opening this space to me
Speaker 1: to say what I want to say. I have a
Speaker 1: lot more to learn, but reflecting on what I've learned
Speaker 1: so far was an amazing exercise. Yeah. So I encourage
Speaker 1: everybody to do it out there. Third is just a number,
Speaker 1: but I'm glad to be here, and more so, I'm
Speaker 1: glad to be here by your side, and also with
Speaker 1: the knowledge that my biggest priority this year is to
Speaker 1: work on what matters most, which is.
Speaker 2: Right here. Yes, you know, preach baby can. I can't
Speaker 2: wait to watch mm HM. And it wouldn't be your birthday.
Speaker 4: Without all right, everybody, welcome new segment on Earth, and otherwise.
Speaker 1: Thank you, all right, everybody. Albert Einstein predicted how gravity
Speaker 1: should work at the largest scales, and new research suggest
Speaker 1: he was right. Can you believe that shit after all
Speaker 1: this time? Made up of my asshole? New research also
Speaker 1: suggests he was definitely smart enough to own and use
Speaker 1: a hair brush, but unfortunately did not. Oh brother, yeah, no,
Speaker 1: I mean that's me when I wake up though, I'm
Speaker 1: Midlet's get you. Well, maybe you shall call me at Medina.
Speaker 2: I do, I call you? And that's where that comes,
Speaker 2: all right.
Speaker 1: A four point four to five billion year old crystal
Speaker 1: from Mars reveals the planet has had water the whole time.
Speaker 1: After close inspection and lateral dissection of the crystal, it
Speaker 1: has been discovered that etched into the stone were the
Speaker 1: words heavy on. Okay, I swear you know.
Speaker 2: I listened so intently as if the last line is
Speaker 2: not going to be alive.
Speaker 1: But you'll yeah, I just report the news on my birthday. Okay. Lastly,
Speaker 1: and that's a telescope spotted a glowing nebula that looks
Speaker 1: like a guitar shredding rapid pulses of stellar material through
Speaker 1: space like sound waves through a packed concert stadium. The
Speaker 1: man who captured the initial photo was on silo sid
Speaker 1: and mushrooms at the time, but confirms if you are
Speaker 1: sober and squid you can kind of see it and
Speaker 1: this has been space. Wow.
Speaker 2: You know, there are never any less entertaining or any
Speaker 2: less impressive.
Speaker 1: They're way better when you edit them, I think because
Speaker 1: I mess up in between all them. But y'all don't
Speaker 1: see that.
Speaker 2: You definitely could deserve like a little spot in SNL.
Speaker 2: I won't lie. I won't lie.
Speaker 1: Well, thank you little comedy.
Speaker 2: Writer over there. Maybe that's in the next decade.
Speaker 1: Maybe, but you know they don't pay those people enough money.
Speaker 1: So anyway, my point is, happy birthday to me, Happy
Speaker 1: birthday baby. Thank you to iHeart and to my beautiful,
Speaker 1: amazing partner for allowing a space for me to celebrates
Speaker 1: this milestone. Because people keep telling me it's a milestone,
Speaker 1: but I don't think it's a milestone. I think it's
Speaker 1: more just a reason to like recalibrate. It's a spring cleaning.
Speaker 1: I'm spring cleaning.
Speaker 2: Welcome to the third floor, baby.
Speaker 1: I bought new soap, so maybe did you no? I'm
Speaker 1: like I haven't seen it, babe. Now that you're thirty
Speaker 1: and you've been there for a few months and you're
Speaker 1: so old, can you give me any concet house letting
Speaker 1: it get better? I'm just kidding, hope.
Speaker 2: Nah, I'm still learning. I feel like I just turned thirty.
Speaker 1: You didn't, though you're old. Thanks love you so much,
Speaker 1: so you don't have any cont.
Speaker 2: Thirty one should be It'll be really nice to jump.
Speaker 1: What I'm going to leave you with out there is that,
Speaker 1: remember you are not born one year old, you're born zero,
Speaker 1: So when you turn one, you've earned that year. So
Speaker 1: if you're twenty nine, you've actually already complete the twenty
Speaker 1: ninth year and you're starting your thirtieth year. So really,
Speaker 1: I'm actually completed my thirtieth year and I'll start my
Speaker 1: thirty first. So in lieu of trying to make you
Speaker 1: guys feel worse, I actually made myself feel worse. But
Speaker 1: that's okay. Anyway. I really am grateful for this space
Speaker 1: and it was amazing to gather this list. So even
Speaker 1: if you don't have a podcast or anybody to say it,
Speaker 1: to make a list, make a list of what you've
Speaker 1: learned so far, and maybe I did it twenty ninth? Yeah,
Speaker 1: and maybe it'll inspire you to see where you want
Speaker 1: to be in your next decade. I would like a penis,
Speaker 1: but whoa.
Speaker 2: Anyway, this has been world O my god.
Speaker 1: We love you. Happy birthday to me, Happy Birthday.
Speaker 2: Maybe follow us on in our own world pod on
Speaker 2: socials if you want to see more of this weird content.
Speaker 2: Emily is tworking. It's working.
Speaker 3: Thirty one is gonna be a good one.
Speaker 1: Love you, love your oh no. Launch.
Speaker 2: This podcast is brought to you by Moonflower Productions in
Speaker 2: partnership with Iheartmichaeldura podcast Network. For more podcasts, visit the
Speaker 2: iHeartRadio app or wherever you listen to your favorite shows