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Speaker 1: Hey, it's Keon and this is Carly, your favorite Okay

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Speaker 1: Storytime host, and we've got some great stories coming up.

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Speaker 2: Well before that, we have a quick two minute break

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Speaker 2: from the sponsors that keep the show alive.

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Speaker 1: The doctors are ignoring my husband, so I channeled my

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Speaker 1: inner Karen h.

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Speaker 3: Oh Here comes by Fay Bob.

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Speaker 1: Husband has a sore foot. No injury or medical condition

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Speaker 1: that would explain the pain, but he hasn't been able

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Speaker 1: to walk properly for about a week. Being the absolute

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Speaker 1: pain in my butt that he is. He refused to

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Speaker 1: go to the doctors until today. Apparently he preferred to

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Speaker 1: just take pain meds and complain to me. By the way,

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Speaker 1: this comes from Throwaway am I the a hole in

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Speaker 1: ninety twenty one and if you want to submit your

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Speaker 1: own stories, go to the r slash Okay Storytime subreddit.

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Speaker 3: I'm Carly, I'm Savannah.

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Speaker 2: And this is Mia and Keon and we're.

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Speaker 1: Here to give good advice goofully, But we don't have

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Speaker 1: all the answers. We only know what we would do.

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Speaker 1: Let us know what you would do in the comments,

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Speaker 1: and Op says it's gotten progressively more swollen and misshapen

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Speaker 1: looking and today, it's gone a funny color and he

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Speaker 1: can't put any weight on it. So I called our GP,

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Speaker 1: who has sent him to the walking clinic at our

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Speaker 1: local hospital. We finally get seen and the doctor refused

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Speaker 1: to even examine it, told him without even looking at

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Speaker 1: the foot, that it was a sprain and he wasn't

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Speaker 1: going to prescribe him any painkillers, so not to ask.

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Speaker 1: Then he started demonstrating some kind of exercises that involved

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Speaker 1: going up and down on tiptoes and flexing the toes.

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Speaker 1: I asked if he would please just look, as it

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Speaker 1: has gone nearly black in some spots and looked similar

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Speaker 1: to how my wrist looked when I broke it a

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Speaker 1: few years ago. He huffed at me and asked where

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Speaker 1: my medical degree was from. It put my back up

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Speaker 1: and I demanded to see another doctor or his senior.

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Speaker 1: I was the a hole here because it wasn't me

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Speaker 1: being treated, So I get he thought I was a

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Speaker 1: pushy cow and when it's say boo to a goose

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Speaker 1: in a medical situation, and would have accepted the doctor's

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Speaker 1: instructions without any questions about actually needing to be examined.

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Speaker 1: Doctor left and we heard him outside the cubicle, telling

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Speaker 1: the senior doctor that they have a confrontational spouse who

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Speaker 1: thinks her web md sarch and qualifies her to instruct

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Speaker 1: real doctors how to practice medicine. He also states that

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Speaker 1: he suspects my husband of exaggeration to get opiates.

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Speaker 3: Wow, crap occupations here.

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Speaker 1: By the time the other doctor arrives, I'm seething and

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Speaker 1: I lay out exactly what went on and explained I

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Speaker 1: only want someone to look at the foot before sending

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Speaker 1: us away. He looks ques X rays and MRI, the

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Speaker 1: good painkillers and a walking boot cast thing with potential

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Speaker 1: to need surgery because he's got seven stress fractures in

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Speaker 1: that foot, probably from running, admittedly worse than they needed

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Speaker 1: to be, because he didn't get any treatment when they

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Speaker 1: first started to hurt. Second doctor and someone from the

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Speaker 1: hospital admin come and apologize for the first doctor and

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Speaker 1: ask if we want to make a formal complaint.

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Speaker 2: A lot of people in the chat are saying very

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Speaker 2: British like terms, So.

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Speaker 1: Assuming that was the goose in the hospital, yes, the

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Speaker 1: cow and the cow and.

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Speaker 2: Oh no, she's going back to she's laying down.

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Speaker 1: From this angle.

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Speaker 4: Looks hilarious because she's like hot dogged across she do,

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Speaker 4: so I did because the outcome of him not listening

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Speaker 4: to the patient or family could have been worse.

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Speaker 1: Husband did not. Husband said later that the first doctor

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Speaker 1: may get sacked because of me complaining, and I should

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Speaker 1: have left it because no real harm was done. Was

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Speaker 1: it an a hole move to complain the fact that

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Speaker 1: your husband.

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Speaker 5: Is like, well, like, no real harm was done from

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Speaker 5: him just completely ignoring the fact that my foot was

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Speaker 5: turning black and I had seven stress fractures in it.

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Speaker 1: Okay, until he does it's the next person.

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Speaker 3: Why is the doctor just not doing his job right?

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Speaker 3: I don't know. That's just you're supposed to just look

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Speaker 3: and you know, examine things and be like, oh, here's

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Speaker 3: my diagnosis. Instead he's just like, I don't want to

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Speaker 3: see the day.

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Speaker 2: He looks to look at the foot, looks fine.

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Speaker 1: Looks good. He didn't even look at it.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it smells fine, it sounds fine.

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Speaker 3: Sounds fine, looks gross, smells cool. Yeah that's right. He

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Speaker 3: smelled it but didn't actually look at it.

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Speaker 1: I don't usually have careen tendencies, but he was just

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Speaker 1: so patronizing and dismissive, and I kept thinking, what if

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Speaker 1: it was a young mother with a sick baby, and

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Speaker 1: he dismissed that not everything would stand their ground and

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Speaker 1: there could be really serious consequences. We have an update,

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Speaker 1: but no, I think you should put in a complaint.

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Speaker 3: So I made some notes. Okay, look, and I put

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Speaker 3: myself here. That's for me.

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Speaker 1: This is for me.

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Speaker 3: Why dog so op is the Karen? Because she's annoyed

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Speaker 3: that the doctor sucks sucks and then the husband has

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Speaker 3: broken foot, that's literally, and then here she is seething.

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Speaker 2: And then you should draw ears with steam coming out. Mmm.

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Speaker 1: First you should give advice. And if you think, ohp

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Speaker 1: he's the a hole for complaining, no, I don't think

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Speaker 1: oh he's the a hole at all for complaining. Look,

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Speaker 1: do your job.

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Speaker 3: Look at my foot and tell me if it's broke.

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Speaker 3: You didn't even like look at it. It's like that's

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Speaker 3: the spring.

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Speaker 1: The fact that he's not even willing to look is insane. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I'd be like, can I get another doctor in here?

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Speaker 1: Doctor who wants to be a doctor in here? God

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Speaker 1: forbid the doctor who's unwilling to be a doctor gets

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Speaker 1: a complain against him. Yeah, no, he has to start doctoring.

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Speaker 3: Oh no, yeah, it's like if if someone comes in

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Speaker 3: on your foot, it's black immediate X ray. What Yeah,

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Speaker 3: Like you're not even gonna say like, oh, you need

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Speaker 3: an extray or whatever. Like didn't even look at it.

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Speaker 3: Was just like, oh, this guy wants sop.

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Speaker 1: It's yeah, your husband couldn't walk and your husband was

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Speaker 1: okay with just going home. Yeah, just being told is

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Speaker 1: his brain just go home? You're fine, you're fine, you're

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Speaker 1: here for.

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Speaker 3: And then when it doesn't heal in like three months

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Speaker 3: and it's like disgusting now because it healed wrong, then

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Speaker 3: what then that's way more time and energy and like

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Speaker 3: then you might have to get a whole another surgery.

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Speaker 3: Like you know, it's just like just look at it.

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Speaker 3: Just look at it.

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Speaker 1: Especially you could tell from the reaction of the second

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Speaker 1: doctor that he was like, oh dang, that first doctor messed.

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, man, Dutchess says, advocating for yourself and your

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Speaker 2: loved ones does not make you a Karen. Yeah, this

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Speaker 2: is the time to like, this is like when you

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Speaker 2: get a super spine, you know, like you gotta really

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Speaker 2: stand up, not just let it subside. Write Mia me me.

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Speaker 1: I've shown Hoppy the post. And he started to realize

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Speaker 1: how serious it could have been and is going to

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Speaker 1: email the admin guy. We saw this afternoon. He gave

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Speaker 1: us his contact details for my complaint. He also agreed

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Speaker 1: that delaying treatment the way he did was incredibly stupid

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Speaker 1: and has decided to chase up the counseling referral with

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Speaker 1: the GP so he will be less useless in future

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Speaker 1: medical situations. Thankfully, we were eventually given appropriate treatment and

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Speaker 1: hopefully the follow up will be positive. Once again, Thanks

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Speaker 1: for setting my mind at ease and sharing your opinions.

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Speaker 1: And that is the end of that story. Yeah, good

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Speaker 1: on you for standing up for your healthcare.

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Speaker 3: Exactly if like, do your job, I don't understand. If

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Speaker 3: you like, if you don't feel like doing your job,

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Speaker 3: then don't be doctor. What if you don't feel like

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Speaker 3: doing your job, don't go in that day?

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Speaker 6: And that's the end of this story. Sorry, we're gonna

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Speaker 6: go to the next one.

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Speaker 3: I almost hired someone for my wife's work party, not

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Speaker 3: knowing it was their arrival.

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Speaker 1: And they come in snapping like West Side story.

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Speaker 3: I have been married to my wife for almost fifteen years.

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Speaker 3: Few years back, we went through a rough patch. I

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Speaker 3: was working long weeks trying to move up in my field,

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Speaker 3: and we made the joint decision for her to be

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Speaker 3: a stay at home mom. And though I was working

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Speaker 3: six days a week, I tried to give my wife

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Speaker 3: as much free time as possible. By the way, this

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Speaker 3: comes from punch Cheesy and if you want to submit

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Speaker 3: your own stories, get to the r slash Okay Storytime suburn.

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Speaker 2: I'm Savannah, I'm Carly, I'm Keon, and we on.

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Speaker 3: He had to give some good advice, goofully, but we

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Speaker 3: do not have all of your answers. We will only

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Speaker 3: tell you what we would do in this situation, but

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Speaker 3: let us know what you would do in the comment. Still,

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Speaker 3: things were rocky, and after eighteen ish months, she started

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Speaker 3: saying she wanted to be more social. We moved out

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Speaker 3: of the country a little before we had our twins,

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Speaker 3: so it was understandable being dumb. I decided to surprise

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Speaker 3: her with the dinner party. I invited some guys from

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Speaker 3: work and their wives over all without you know, considering

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Speaker 3: that someone would have to host this dinner party and

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Speaker 3: that someone would end up being my wife.

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Speaker 1: Don't worry.

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Speaker 3: I accept the responsibility of being dumb. Nevertheless, my wonderful

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Speaker 3: wife did put together a lovely dinner party and discovered

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Speaker 3: a love or planning events. A few months after, she

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Speaker 3: decided to go back to school for hospitality so that

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Speaker 3: she could be an event coordinator. We arranged for part

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Speaker 3: time care of our girls, and after graduating, she found

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Speaker 3: a job in her field. Five years later, she moved

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Speaker 3: to another company and is currently up for a promotion

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Speaker 3: and has been schmoozing her boshes and high level clients.

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Speaker 3: And she wants to have a party at our new home.

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Speaker 3: Here's where I might meet a hole dence. I have

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Speaker 3: been working so many fewer hours in the last two

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Speaker 3: ish years. I'm home earlier than my wife is, and

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Speaker 3: a lot of my work can be done remotely, So

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Speaker 3: she would like me to handle planning and set up

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Speaker 3: for the dinner. I'm fine with this, However, I am

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Speaker 3: not good at planning events. I'm the guy who hires

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Speaker 3: someone like my wife to plan parties for them. I'm

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Speaker 3: happy to hire a caterer and someone to come put

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Speaker 3: some tablecloths and random vases of flowers around to make

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Speaker 3: the place look nice, but I don't have an eye

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Speaker 3: for those kinds of things myself. After offering this, my

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Speaker 3: wife acted like I'd just shown Nanny Ruth the family Jewels,

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Speaker 3: saying how horrible it would look if I hired her

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Speaker 3: company's competitor to come host a party at our house

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Speaker 3: and I had to do it myself. I was a

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Speaker 3: little miffed, but the girls were in the living room

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Speaker 3: in earshots, so I told her, all right, well, then

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Speaker 3: I need her to at least give me a checklist

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Speaker 3: of things to do. Okay, easy? Well that turned into

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Speaker 3: how I clearly don't respect her or her profession. Oh,

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Speaker 3: I've always looked out on her for not being as smart.

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Speaker 3: How I don't pay attention to her job, or i'd

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Speaker 3: known what went into planning a party in i'd be

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Speaker 3: able to handle a simple dinner event. I honestly had

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Speaker 3: no idea what sort of minefield I had just walked

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Speaker 3: myself into. I was at a loss, so I herded

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Speaker 3: my girls upstairs so I could try to talk to

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Speaker 3: my wife. But it's been forty five minutes and she's

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Speaker 3: still on FaceTime with her sisters after not wanting to talk. Hey,

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Speaker 3: I don't think I've ever done or said anything to

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Speaker 3: make my wife think that I looked at on her

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Speaker 3: job trying to be as supportive as I can. But

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Speaker 3: maybe she's right and I'm not doing enough. Give it

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Speaker 3: to me straight. If I'm really being the a hole,

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Speaker 3: please tell me so I can go gravel at my

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Speaker 3: wife's feet. There's an edit, Dad, I truly had not

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Speaker 3: considered what I suggested to be a bad look on her,

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Speaker 3: because I wasn't exactly suggesting her direct competitor. But if

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Speaker 3: he works at one of those companies that does everything

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Speaker 3: they have in house Baker's Caterers, planners, ban Flora's, et

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Speaker 3: cetera nice company. See.

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Speaker 1: I do fear though, that you just suggesting that you

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Speaker 1: need to hire a party planner when you live with

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Speaker 1: one is probably where that came from.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I agree.

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Speaker 1: That would be where she thought that you were calling

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Speaker 1: her specifically incompetent.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, you're throwing a party at your house. It's really

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Speaker 1: not that hard.

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Speaker 3: Yeah. And also in when your wife is a planner,

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Speaker 3: you're going to bring another planner and like pay money

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Speaker 3: in this. That's so I don't look good. I do

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Speaker 3: not look good.

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Speaker 1: I think that might have been the issue if you

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Speaker 1: had just started with like, oh my god, yes, I'd

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Speaker 1: love to help you. Let me know what I can do.

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Speaker 3: Day of to set up yet, like I can I

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Speaker 3: can help, like if you need me to like hang

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Speaker 3: things up, or like put a tablecloth on the table.

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Speaker 1: That would have resulted in like, okay, great, here's the tablecloths.

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Speaker 1: They'll go on the tables. A flower vases go on

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Speaker 1: top of the tablecloth.

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Speaker 2: Did you put on the table? Could you make the balloons? No?

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Speaker 1: I might do it wrong.

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Speaker 2: I might do it wrong. Can you put can you

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Speaker 2: put just you know, streamers out like some some stuff.

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Speaker 3: I don't know what that means. I don't know.

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Speaker 1: I've never seen a streamer in my life.

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Speaker 3: I don't know what that is. I was only planning to

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Speaker 3: hire a restaurant to cater food and maybe someone to

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Speaker 3: help me decorate. I am already planning to apologize profusely.

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Speaker 3: And there is an update. I think that you are

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Speaker 3: the a home oping cause you are trying, Like I

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Speaker 3: understand that, like maybe you don't want to like do

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Speaker 3: it wrong, but it seems like you're not even like trying.

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Speaker 3: You're kind of just like, oh, I don't really know

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Speaker 3: how to do it. So I'm just gonna like sit

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Speaker 3: here until you get here, or I can hire someone

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Speaker 3: in your field to do what you do at our house.

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Speaker 3: Both of those are the wrong answer.

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Speaker 1: I can understand because I see people being like, well,

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Speaker 1: you didn't want to have the wife work her own party? Fair, yeah,

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Speaker 1: but then being like I'm gonna hire your competitor really bad.

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Speaker 3: Well, there is an update. I followed your advice, and

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Speaker 3: the first morning after our argument and after our girls

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Speaker 3: went to school, I did sit down and apologize to

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Speaker 3: my wife. I told her I was so sorry to

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Speaker 3: have made her feel that I wasn't being supportive enough,

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Speaker 3: supporting enough, I clear up the suggestion of hiring the

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Speaker 3: competition and explain what I meant more clearly. I also

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Speaker 3: gave her the floor and asked if she could tell

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Speaker 3: me why she'd been so upset, if it was just

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Speaker 3: because of the suggesting a competitor thing, or if there

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Speaker 3: was something else going on that she could talk to

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Speaker 3: me about anything. She has another coworker whom I will

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Speaker 3: nickname Kayla, who is also up for the same promotion,

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Speaker 3: and only one of them will get it. The day

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Speaker 3: of our argument, Kayla had snuck in her fiance to

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Speaker 3: set up a big brunch slash lunch thing for the office.

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Speaker 3: Of course, my wife is stressed and she has been

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Speaker 3: working very hard for this promotion, so her thought process

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Speaker 3: was that I needed to step up and do the

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Speaker 3: same as Kayla's fiance did. However, I pointed out that

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Speaker 3: we knew Kayla and knew her fiance, and he is

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Speaker 3: the main manager in charge of running a large ish

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Speaker 3: hotel in our city. Part of his job is also

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Speaker 3: managing events that they have at the hotel, which happened

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Speaker 3: often because the hotel is gorgeous and the perfect backdrop

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Speaker 3: for weddings, conferences, fundraising dinners, etc. It clicked in her

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Speaker 3: mind that my skill levels were not on par with

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Speaker 3: Kayla's fiance. We talked and I made us something neat

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Speaker 3: and then drove her to the office, even walked her

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Speaker 3: inside and carried her coffee for her. I got to

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Speaker 3: meet a few new faces, and my wife also introduced

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Speaker 3: me to the newest member of her team, who was

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Speaker 3: still learning the ropes. With my wife's prior approval, I

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Speaker 3: asked the new team member if he'd be willing to

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Speaker 3: let me hire him just as a consultant on a

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Speaker 3: dinner party. I need a little help with the color

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Speaker 3: schemes and flowers, as I'm red slash green color blad. Oh, so,

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Speaker 3: I ope, you gotta had like a reason. He's like,

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Speaker 3: I don't know, I don't know what you can still

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Speaker 3: put down, but.

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Speaker 2: Christmas must suck for you.

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Speaker 1: Op s Well, he would just mix up the colors.

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Speaker 1: He's probably not unable to see them.

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Speaker 3: Yeah. Still, you all were right about the communication being

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Speaker 3: lacking and how I was being insensitive about suggesting a competitor,

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Speaker 3: even if it wasn't exactly my intention. Circling back to communication,

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Speaker 3: I also severely underestimated myself and my abilities and was

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Speaker 3: writing it off as something I just couldn't do rather

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Speaker 3: than a puzzle to work out with some effort.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I think that was honestly. The issue is you

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Speaker 1: just were immediately like Nope, can't do it, when we

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Speaker 1: could have just like thought about it for maybe like

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Speaker 1: five more minutes and probably figured out a multitude of solution.

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Speaker 3: Yep, but this could have been avoided, and yet it wasn't.

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Speaker 3: But at least you admitted it and know that you

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Speaker 3: are not Trupper's tool in the shed, got it? So Yeah,

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Speaker 3: it ended up just being my stupidity and lack of

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Speaker 3: clear communication with my wife and partially a little over

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Speaker 3: expectations for my wife, but with as much as she's

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Speaker 3: been working and as stressed as she's been, it's completely forgivable.

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Speaker 3: I just wanted to update you all and thank you

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Speaker 3: for helping me see that I was way underestimating myself.

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Speaker 3: I thought I was supporting my wife in every way

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Speaker 3: I could, but I was failing in the way she

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Speaker 3: needed me and the way it counted. We've rectified the situation,

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Speaker 3: and I'm now confident that I could pull this dinner

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Speaker 3: party off with a little help here or there. For

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Speaker 3: my consultant and Pinterest. Thank you so much. Oh, and

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Speaker 3: there is another edit. I hope it's okay to add

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Speaker 3: this edit. It seemed necessary because so many people seem

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Speaker 3: to think that two three thousand character limit posts give

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Speaker 3: you enough insight into my relationship to deem me a

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Speaker 3: battered husband. My wife is in no way harmful towards

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Speaker 3: me whatsoever. She is a human being who sometimes gets

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Speaker 3: stressed and overwhelmed and overreacts. That does not make her

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Speaker 3: harmful terrible person. It simply makes her imperfect, and so

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Speaker 3: are we all. Seems like it all kind of worked

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Speaker 3: out here. I'm hoping that in the future try little harder.

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Speaker 3: Opie and don't just dismiss your wife, like Pigeon says,

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Speaker 3: trying some stuff and asking for her advice would have

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Speaker 3: been better than immediately trying to hire her competition. Yes,

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Speaker 3: there we go, good intentions of wanting to throw a

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Speaker 3: party for her without like, yeah, ruining it and asking

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Speaker 3: her to help. But at the end of the day,

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Speaker 3: I feel like it you tried, yeah doing it and

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Speaker 3: like maybe getting it wrong. You know, I think would

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Speaker 3: be better than like just hiring a competitor and being

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Speaker 3: like he he he, I did this while you were looking.

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Speaker 3: I am not always great at knowing what details are relevant,

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Speaker 3: and with the character limit that also makes it extra hard.

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Speaker 3: My wife did apologize to me as well, accept her

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Speaker 3: part of the blame for our whole argument. She apologized

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Speaker 3: to me and we had a very good talk. I

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Speaker 3: am a civil slash structural engineer, and she sort of

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Speaker 3: chuckled and made a joke about Kayle's fiance never being

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Speaker 3: able to do what I do. He recognized and accepted

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Speaker 3: responsibility that she'd made a mistake. I do understand where

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Speaker 3: others are coming from and assume I mean that she's controlling,

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Speaker 3: but six thousand characters is a difficult constraint when trying

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Speaker 3: to get enough relevant information across front an internet platform.

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Speaker 3: So for that, I apologize. I am still working on

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Speaker 3: some of my communication skills. My wife is a kind

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Speaker 3: and gentle and thoughtful and compassionate person. He leaves me

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Speaker 3: post it notes hidden throughout the house with love notes

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Speaker 3: and reminds me when I'm low how much she loves slash,

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Speaker 3: appreciates me, and is a terrific wife, mother, daughters, sister,

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Speaker 3: and friend. Please accept that she is also human and

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Speaker 3: also makes mistakes. Just as I accept this about her,

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Speaker 3: she accepts it about me as well. I make my

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Speaker 3: fair share of mistakes and overreactions just like she does,

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Speaker 3: and she always handles it with grace. I'm simply trying

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Speaker 3: to do the same for her.

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Speaker 6: And that's the end of this story. We're gonna go

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Speaker 6: to the next one.

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Speaker 1: My coworker gave me her husband's deprized collection. Now she

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Speaker 1: wants them back.

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Speaker 2: Give me back my jools.

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Speaker 1: Early December, a coworker asked me if I wanted magic

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Speaker 1: the gathering cards her husband wanted to get rid of.

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Speaker 1: Going through the cards, I found that they were a lot,

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Speaker 1: and I mean a lot of cards ranging from anywhere

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Speaker 1: between fifteen and eighty dollars. I thought it was a

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Speaker 1: little weird that her husband would just give away that

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Speaker 1: many expensive cards, so I texted my coworker to ask

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Speaker 1: if she was sure that her husband was giving everything

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Speaker 1: to me. Her response was, yes, he is sure. He

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Speaker 1: doesn't play with them anymore. Enjoy. So I kept the

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Speaker 1: cards to build a deck, traded some, and sold a

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Speaker 1: bunch of them at my local card shop for a

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Speaker 1: couple hundred of bucks. Yeah. By the way, this comes

404
00:19:33,760 --> 00:19:36,639
Speaker 1: from confused Cat eighty seven, and if you want to

405
00:19:36,640 --> 00:19:38,879
Speaker 1: submit your own stories, go to the r slash Okay

406
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Speaker 1: storytime subreddit.

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Speaker 2: I'm Carly and I'm Savannah, I'm Keon.

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Speaker 1: And we're here to give good advice goofily, but we

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Speaker 1: don't have all the answers. We really know what we

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Speaker 1: would do. Let us know what you would do in

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Speaker 1: the comments, and nop says. Fast forward to yesterday. My

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Speaker 1: coworker came to me during lunch to ask if I

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Speaker 1: could give her back all the cards.

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Speaker 2: Oh, and that's when you say, what cards.

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Speaker 1: Turns out she didn't ask her husband at all before

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Speaker 1: giving everything to me, and he's extremely pissed about it.

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Speaker 2: I knew it. I didn't want to say it, but

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Speaker 2: I knew it that one when when she said, no,

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Speaker 2: he doesn't, he doesn't playing with them anymore, I'm like,

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Speaker 2: I don't think he was playing with them. He was

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Speaker 2: probably holding onto them, not so much money. Could you

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Speaker 2: imagine if he had a black Okay, if to anyone

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Speaker 2: any of my EMPTG fans, can you imagine he had

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Speaker 2: the first first edition black Lotus?

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Speaker 1: I told it was that that's.

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Speaker 3: The highest one.

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Speaker 1: They said was eighty dollars.

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Speaker 2: I know, I know, but if he had a first

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Speaker 2: edition black Lotus, especially if it's not grated, I think

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Speaker 2: it can range like around ten thousand dollars to like

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Speaker 2: one hundred thousand dollars.

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Speaker 1: Well, I imagine that one wouldn't be in a brief

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Speaker 1: In a briefcase, sometimes.

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Speaker 2: You never know.

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Speaker 1: I told her that I could give back the cards

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Speaker 1: I still own, but I've traded and sold a lot

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00:21:00,600 --> 00:21:03,760
Speaker 1: of them and didn't have them anymore. She got pretty

438
00:21:03,760 --> 00:21:05,959
Speaker 1: desperate when I told her that, and then asked if

439
00:21:06,000 --> 00:21:08,399
Speaker 1: I could also give her in addition to the collection

440
00:21:08,520 --> 00:21:11,840
Speaker 1: I still own, the money I made so her husband

441
00:21:11,840 --> 00:21:15,919
Speaker 1: can buy the cards I trade slash sold again. I

442
00:21:16,080 --> 00:21:18,359
Speaker 1: told her that I thought I was already pretty nice

443
00:21:18,359 --> 00:21:20,800
Speaker 1: to give back some of her husband's collection, but it's

444
00:21:20,880 --> 00:21:23,800
Speaker 1: too late for the card I've traded and sold and

445
00:21:23,880 --> 00:21:27,120
Speaker 1: I'm keeping the money. So it's either that or I'm

446
00:21:27,200 --> 00:21:30,480
Speaker 1: keeping everything. She got very mad, and when she started

447
00:21:30,560 --> 00:21:33,520
Speaker 1: yelling at me to give everything money included back to

448
00:21:33,560 --> 00:21:36,800
Speaker 1: fix this, I told her that's her problem, and she

449
00:21:37,000 --> 00:21:39,520
Speaker 1: stormed off. She hasn't talked to me since. And I

450
00:21:39,680 --> 00:21:42,560
Speaker 1: still have the cards? Am I the a hole?

451
00:21:43,280 --> 00:21:43,520
Speaker 6: No?

452
00:21:43,760 --> 00:21:44,639
Speaker 1: We haven't update.

453
00:21:44,720 --> 00:21:46,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't know. I don't think. I don't think

454
00:21:46,840 --> 00:21:49,439
Speaker 3: you're the a hole. Like she gave you the cards,

455
00:21:49,520 --> 00:21:52,280
Speaker 3: you double checked and were like, hey, is this okay?

456
00:21:52,280 --> 00:21:56,640
Speaker 3: And she said yeah, it's fine. And also, yeah, she's

457
00:21:56,680 --> 00:21:59,639
Speaker 3: the a hole for her husband's price given away like

458
00:21:59,720 --> 00:22:02,399
Speaker 3: his like that's his stuff, so why were you just

459
00:22:02,440 --> 00:22:02,879
Speaker 3: giving me?

460
00:22:03,280 --> 00:22:05,480
Speaker 2: Opie was smart too, because Opie was like, I'm gonna

461
00:22:05,760 --> 00:22:06,960
Speaker 2: like it was like not even it was like a

462
00:22:06,960 --> 00:22:12,240
Speaker 2: triple check. It was like, okay, okay, are you sure right?

463
00:22:12,480 --> 00:22:15,080
Speaker 2: Like he doesn't want these, and you have the text

464
00:22:15,080 --> 00:22:18,200
Speaker 2: of her saying no, no, he doesn't, he doesn't play

465
00:22:18,200 --> 00:22:18,760
Speaker 2: with them anymore.

466
00:22:19,480 --> 00:22:23,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's on her to clarify some things. I told

467
00:22:23,320 --> 00:22:27,520
Speaker 1: my coworker that they were valuable cards in her husband's collection.

468
00:22:27,840 --> 00:22:30,639
Speaker 1: When I texted her to reconfirm.

469
00:22:30,080 --> 00:22:30,800
Speaker 2: That's crazy.

470
00:22:31,000 --> 00:22:33,959
Speaker 3: Yeah, so you literally gave her every chance to be like,

471
00:22:34,400 --> 00:22:38,080
Speaker 3: you know what, actually maybe not, but you were like, nope,

472
00:22:38,080 --> 00:22:40,639
Speaker 3: get rid of them, onno, on them. So that's on you, girl.

473
00:22:41,200 --> 00:22:45,320
Speaker 1: The collection I was gifted wasn't just valuable cards. The

474
00:22:45,359 --> 00:22:48,359
Speaker 1: majority of cards were pretty cheap, like under a dollar.

475
00:22:48,840 --> 00:22:51,320
Speaker 1: It's just that with the amount of cards given, the

476
00:22:51,400 --> 00:22:55,160
Speaker 1: number of valuable cards grow pretty quickly. I've also read

477
00:22:55,160 --> 00:22:59,040
Speaker 1: a lot of comments about keeping stolen goods for myself.

478
00:22:59,560 --> 00:23:01,600
Speaker 1: I'm willing to give back the rest of the cards

479
00:23:01,600 --> 00:23:04,200
Speaker 1: I have to her husband, but my coworker is the

480
00:23:04,240 --> 00:23:06,480
Speaker 1: only way I have to give it back to him.

481
00:23:07,400 --> 00:23:12,280
Speaker 1: Update to jump right into it. This blew up way

482
00:23:12,320 --> 00:23:14,760
Speaker 1: more than I thought, so here's a quick late night update.

483
00:23:15,160 --> 00:23:17,720
Speaker 1: I have managed to speak with my coworker's husband to

484
00:23:17,760 --> 00:23:20,480
Speaker 1: be a messenger and showed him the screenshot of my

485
00:23:20,600 --> 00:23:23,680
Speaker 1: discussion I had with her, telling her about the value

486
00:23:23,720 --> 00:23:26,199
Speaker 1: of some cards and if she was sure he was

487
00:23:26,280 --> 00:23:29,840
Speaker 1: okay with giving me everything. As a lot of comments

488
00:23:29,840 --> 00:23:33,159
Speaker 1: recommend me to do, we're gonna meet tomorrow so I

489
00:23:33,200 --> 00:23:36,080
Speaker 1: can give him back what I have left of his collection.

490
00:23:36,480 --> 00:23:36,840
Speaker 2: Honey.

491
00:23:37,880 --> 00:23:41,280
Speaker 1: I will never have her Pokemon cards away, Honey, I

492
00:23:41,280 --> 00:23:44,800
Speaker 1: will use touch your Pokemon cards. Yeah, this sounds are

493
00:23:44,840 --> 00:23:45,800
Speaker 1: in shoe boxes.

494
00:23:45,880 --> 00:23:47,399
Speaker 3: I mean that was just crappy you've her to do

495
00:23:47,560 --> 00:23:49,720
Speaker 3: in the first place, like to be like, oh, like

496
00:23:49,800 --> 00:23:52,760
Speaker 3: who would you like to sprinklean or something and be like, eh,

497
00:23:52,840 --> 00:23:55,800
Speaker 3: he doesn't need these anymore and just like gave them

498
00:23:55,800 --> 00:23:58,480
Speaker 3: away without even asking him. That's on you, girl, That

499
00:23:58,640 --> 00:24:01,399
Speaker 3: is not on op. I don't be like double triple

500
00:24:01,440 --> 00:24:04,359
Speaker 3: quadruple checked to make sure and even told you the

501
00:24:04,440 --> 00:24:06,920
Speaker 3: value of these cars and you're like, yeah, it's fine.

502
00:24:07,800 --> 00:24:10,239
Speaker 3: As soon as we take it. It's like, wait, I

503
00:24:10,280 --> 00:24:13,520
Speaker 3: need everything back, including the money and everything else that

504
00:24:13,560 --> 00:24:17,600
Speaker 3: went into that. And it's like, no, actually, you gave

505
00:24:17,600 --> 00:24:19,600
Speaker 3: me permission to do whatever the heck I wanted, and

506
00:24:19,640 --> 00:24:22,200
Speaker 3: so I did. I wonder how much time like passed

507
00:24:22,240 --> 00:24:25,080
Speaker 3: between that, Like I'm sure it wasn't like a week

508
00:24:25,240 --> 00:24:25,880
Speaker 3: or you know.

509
00:24:26,119 --> 00:24:27,960
Speaker 1: I could see it being up to a week, probably

510
00:24:28,000 --> 00:24:31,960
Speaker 1: a week. I feel like husband sounds pretty understanding.

511
00:24:31,359 --> 00:24:35,240
Speaker 3: Though, Yeah, sounds like he's like, well, yet's that you

512
00:24:35,440 --> 00:24:36,240
Speaker 3: checked a bunch.

513
00:24:36,480 --> 00:24:39,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, no, yeah, you're I think you're You're covered. Dope.

514
00:24:40,000 --> 00:24:42,800
Speaker 2: She gave me mad all she wants. Text Yeah, she

515
00:24:42,840 --> 00:24:43,840
Speaker 2: can me mad all she wants.

516
00:24:43,840 --> 00:24:51,080
Speaker 7: But oh well, stella, it did give those vibes. Okay,

517
00:24:52,320 --> 00:24:56,280
Speaker 7: missus White Yo, missus White Yo.

518
00:24:56,680 --> 00:24:58,520
Speaker 2: My name is Skyler White Yo.

519
00:25:00,000 --> 00:25:01,719
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I just realize we can have Angie

520
00:25:01,720 --> 00:25:05,919
Speaker 1: do that. My name is Angelina White. Ye.

521
00:25:06,080 --> 00:25:10,480
Speaker 2: My boyfriend, Riley Wilson YO, about the.

522
00:25:10,480 --> 00:25:12,760
Speaker 1: Cards I've sold or traded, He told me not to

523
00:25:12,760 --> 00:25:16,480
Speaker 1: worry about it and keep everything because what's done is done.

524
00:25:17,040 --> 00:25:19,200
Speaker 1: He did ask, though, how much money I made by

525
00:25:19,240 --> 00:25:21,679
Speaker 1: selling some of his cards, because he fully intended to

526
00:25:21,680 --> 00:25:24,919
Speaker 1: make my coworker pay him back the same amount of

527
00:25:24,960 --> 00:25:29,280
Speaker 1: money I made, which is about five hundred dollars overall.

528
00:25:29,320 --> 00:25:31,600
Speaker 1: The dude was pretty chill with me and very thankful

529
00:25:31,640 --> 00:25:34,720
Speaker 1: to get most of his collection back. Side note, I

530
00:25:34,720 --> 00:25:37,639
Speaker 1: wouldn't be surprised if my coworker announced next week that

531
00:25:37,680 --> 00:25:40,639
Speaker 1: her husband has filed for divorce, because he made it

532
00:25:40,960 --> 00:25:45,880
Speaker 1: very clear during our conversation that he was completely done

533
00:25:45,960 --> 00:25:49,200
Speaker 1: with her and that is the end.

534
00:25:49,320 --> 00:25:52,520
Speaker 3: Wow. Okay, so she just ruined her marriage.

535
00:25:53,280 --> 00:25:56,480
Speaker 2: Dang, I mean, OPI gave her a.

536
00:25:56,480 --> 00:26:00,880
Speaker 1: Lot of money and that's on her. Yeah. I kind

537
00:26:00,880 --> 00:26:05,040
Speaker 1: of wonder if there was some sort of milician like

538
00:26:05,080 --> 00:26:06,960
Speaker 1: maybe he was playing with this.

539
00:26:07,680 --> 00:26:10,320
Speaker 3: I feel like she probably like did it on purpose

540
00:26:10,800 --> 00:26:14,040
Speaker 3: at d but they like didn't expect him to like

541
00:26:14,720 --> 00:26:16,639
Speaker 3: maybe find out so quickly or so. I don't know,

542
00:26:17,400 --> 00:26:23,719
Speaker 3: but I don't know. This girl sounds like a dumb

543
00:26:23,760 --> 00:26:28,920
Speaker 3: little dummy butt what puncher.

544
00:26:30,040 --> 00:26:31,840
Speaker 6: And that's the end of this story. We're gonna go

545
00:26:31,840 --> 00:26:32,560
Speaker 6: to the next one.

546
00:26:33,480 --> 00:26:37,159
Speaker 3: My wife threatened divorced if I kept my job. I

547
00:26:37,240 --> 00:26:38,480
Speaker 3: didn't think she was serious.

548
00:26:38,920 --> 00:26:40,399
Speaker 1: What the heck is your job?

549
00:26:40,720 --> 00:26:40,880
Speaker 6: Hi?

550
00:26:41,119 --> 00:26:43,720
Speaker 3: Thirty two male have been married to my wife twenty

551
00:26:43,800 --> 00:26:46,600
Speaker 3: nine female for seven years now. I met my wife

552
00:26:46,680 --> 00:26:48,880
Speaker 3: during college and now she's a stay at home mom

553
00:26:49,040 --> 00:26:51,439
Speaker 3: to our two kids. Our two daughters are seven and

554
00:26:51,520 --> 00:26:54,280
Speaker 3: five years old. I work as a marine engineer on

555
00:26:54,440 --> 00:26:56,600
Speaker 3: rigs and ships for a large part of the year.

556
00:26:57,040 --> 00:26:59,119
Speaker 3: This leads to me spending a lot of time away

557
00:26:59,119 --> 00:27:02,200
Speaker 3: from home. I'm away from my family. Isn't very easy

558
00:27:02,240 --> 00:27:06,240
Speaker 3: on me either, but maritime technology is my passion. I

559
00:27:06,400 --> 00:27:09,320
Speaker 3: love life at sea. By the way, this comes from

560
00:27:09,480 --> 00:27:11,399
Speaker 3: Home and Away eighty six and If you want to

561
00:27:11,400 --> 00:27:13,280
Speaker 3: submit your own stories, go to the r slash Okay

562
00:27:13,320 --> 00:27:15,720
Speaker 3: Storytime subret I'm Savannah, I'm.

563
00:27:15,600 --> 00:27:17,760
Speaker 2: Carly, I'm Keon and we he.

564
00:27:17,760 --> 00:27:20,479
Speaker 3: Had to give some advice. But we're gonna do it

565
00:27:20,600 --> 00:27:23,440
Speaker 3: funny and you're gonna laugh and everyone's gonna like it.

566
00:27:23,520 --> 00:27:25,760
Speaker 3: And then you're gonna tell us what you're gonna do,

567
00:27:25,960 --> 00:27:27,920
Speaker 3: and everyone's gonna like it, and we're all gonna laugh.

568
00:27:28,000 --> 00:27:30,960
Speaker 3: End of story. As Op says, I'm glad you guys

569
00:27:31,000 --> 00:27:33,600
Speaker 3: are in the same wavelength. These are not the ideal

570
00:27:33,640 --> 00:27:36,280
Speaker 3: circumstances to raise a family in I realize, but my

571
00:27:36,359 --> 00:27:40,399
Speaker 3: career choices have always been consensual between husband and wife.

572
00:27:40,400 --> 00:27:43,480
Speaker 3: For years, all was well and good because we found

573
00:27:43,480 --> 00:27:47,119
Speaker 3: a balance. However, a new lucrative contract entails me working

574
00:27:47,160 --> 00:27:50,399
Speaker 3: on board for three months, stretches only being able to

575
00:27:50,640 --> 00:27:54,360
Speaker 3: briefly return home by playing when shore side at certain points.

576
00:27:54,480 --> 00:27:58,000
Speaker 3: My vacation time in between is forty five days. It's

577
00:27:58,040 --> 00:28:00,800
Speaker 3: been like this for almost a year. When I told

578
00:28:00,800 --> 00:28:04,080
Speaker 3: her about this offer, she was not very elated, rather

579
00:28:04,119 --> 00:28:08,080
Speaker 3: disappointed even but she acquiesceding my excitement when I laid

580
00:28:08,080 --> 00:28:11,120
Speaker 3: out the numbers. Also, this isn't a permanent arrangement either.

581
00:28:11,240 --> 00:28:14,160
Speaker 3: Fast forward to last week. I return home after an assignment,

582
00:28:14,240 --> 00:28:17,000
Speaker 3: eager to jump into vacation with my family. Instead of

583
00:28:17,000 --> 00:28:19,880
Speaker 3: a heartwarming welcome, I get sat down by my wife

584
00:28:19,920 --> 00:28:22,439
Speaker 3: in the kitchen. She took my kids to her parents'

585
00:28:22,480 --> 00:28:24,720
Speaker 3: house so they weren't around. He starts telling me that

586
00:28:24,840 --> 00:28:27,880
Speaker 3: she has had a long time to think about this, literally,

587
00:28:28,040 --> 00:28:30,720
Speaker 3: seeing as I'm away from home so often and for

588
00:28:30,800 --> 00:28:33,320
Speaker 3: so long. Tells me I never listen to her concerns,

589
00:28:33,359 --> 00:28:36,119
Speaker 3: and she proceeds to issue me an ultimatum. Either I

590
00:28:36,160 --> 00:28:39,040
Speaker 3: seriously think about changing careers, or she moves back to

591
00:28:39,120 --> 00:28:41,680
Speaker 3: her parents' house with my kids and she files for

592
00:28:41,760 --> 00:28:46,080
Speaker 3: divorce and custody. Ooh, my eyes almost popped out of

593
00:28:46,120 --> 00:28:48,960
Speaker 3: my head. Talking to her about it later, she still

594
00:28:49,000 --> 00:28:51,360
Speaker 3: went a budge. I propose getting more help around the

595
00:28:51,400 --> 00:28:54,160
Speaker 3: house if she needed that, a nanny. The only thing

596
00:28:54,200 --> 00:28:56,880
Speaker 3: that could appease her is hearing out of my mouth

597
00:28:56,920 --> 00:28:58,880
Speaker 3: that I would quit my current position and that I

598
00:28:58,880 --> 00:29:01,200
Speaker 3: would go into therapy with her. Find it up. Agreen

599
00:29:01,360 --> 00:29:04,040
Speaker 3: with the latter because I just can, because I cannot

600
00:29:04,280 --> 00:29:06,760
Speaker 3: just promise the former. But I have little hope for

601
00:29:06,800 --> 00:29:10,320
Speaker 3: this interim solution. Why is there no mutual compromise possible.

602
00:29:10,440 --> 00:29:12,560
Speaker 3: I work my butt off every day I'm out at

603
00:29:12,640 --> 00:29:15,520
Speaker 3: sea to provide for this family. I absolutely love what

604
00:29:15,560 --> 00:29:18,240
Speaker 3: I do and I would have a hard time letting

605
00:29:18,280 --> 00:29:21,520
Speaker 3: it go. But neither do I want to lose my children,

606
00:29:21,560 --> 00:29:24,840
Speaker 3: which I'm sure I would with the exception of visitation rights.

607
00:29:24,880 --> 00:29:27,200
Speaker 3: Am I the a hole for seriously downing my marriage

608
00:29:27,200 --> 00:29:29,480
Speaker 3: here and possibly hurting the kids in the process. Would

609
00:29:29,480 --> 00:29:31,200
Speaker 3: I be the a ho if I chose my career

610
00:29:31,280 --> 00:29:34,920
Speaker 3: over my family? There isn't edit. My expectations were not betrayed.

611
00:29:34,920 --> 00:29:37,800
Speaker 3: In regard to the response, I recognize everyone's concern for

612
00:29:37,880 --> 00:29:41,000
Speaker 3: my family, and believe me or don't, as is your right.

613
00:29:41,200 --> 00:29:43,560
Speaker 3: I have their best interests at heart, even if it

614
00:29:43,560 --> 00:29:46,280
Speaker 3: seems like I don't. Considering my absence, I have tried

615
00:29:46,320 --> 00:29:48,520
Speaker 3: a lot in these last few years to make things

616
00:29:48,520 --> 00:29:51,000
Speaker 3: easier on them. I set them up with all the

617
00:29:51,040 --> 00:29:54,880
Speaker 3: necessary equipment to have some quality FaceTime Skype moments. I

618
00:29:54,920 --> 00:29:57,640
Speaker 3: bring little souvenirs from every report city we ever moored

619
00:29:58,160 --> 00:30:01,400
Speaker 3: to give them a little remind I always pick out

620
00:30:01,440 --> 00:30:03,880
Speaker 3: a nice gift to return home with for my wife.

621
00:30:03,960 --> 00:30:06,680
Speaker 3: I pray God every night for the crappy offshore internet

622
00:30:06,720 --> 00:30:08,800
Speaker 3: would not give out before I got to make my

623
00:30:08,920 --> 00:30:11,120
Speaker 3: call for the day. I have long chats with my

624
00:30:11,200 --> 00:30:14,320
Speaker 3: wife where we used to laugh together talk about our day,

625
00:30:14,640 --> 00:30:17,440
Speaker 3: where she could tell me anything, share her frustrations, and yes,

626
00:30:17,560 --> 00:30:20,880
Speaker 3: sometimes she would voice her loneliness, her workload, her envy

627
00:30:20,920 --> 00:30:24,080
Speaker 3: at other couples, as would I, but we always came

628
00:30:24,080 --> 00:30:27,120
Speaker 3: to a mutual understanding, knowing that this would not be permanent,

629
00:30:27,240 --> 00:30:30,920
Speaker 3: would only be until I safely secured my position with

630
00:30:30,960 --> 00:30:33,800
Speaker 3: my employer. I guess I did indeed push my luck

631
00:30:33,880 --> 00:30:35,640
Speaker 3: and now have to face the fallout. I try to

632
00:30:35,640 --> 00:30:37,920
Speaker 3: play games with the kids over video chat, which they

633
00:30:37,920 --> 00:30:40,280
Speaker 3: always seem to enjoy, and have them tell me about

634
00:30:40,320 --> 00:30:43,160
Speaker 3: their day, their friends, about scouting and soccer games. It

635
00:30:43,280 --> 00:30:45,120
Speaker 3: saddens me that I don't get to attend all their

636
00:30:45,120 --> 00:30:47,920
Speaker 3: games and events, but when I can, I'm their fiercest

637
00:30:47,960 --> 00:30:51,080
Speaker 3: supporter on sidelines. But that's the only thing I'll ever be,

638
00:30:51,240 --> 00:30:53,800
Speaker 3: won't I a dad on the sidelines. I know I

639
00:30:53,840 --> 00:30:56,320
Speaker 3: am largely at fault here, and sadly I cannot deny

640
00:30:56,360 --> 00:30:59,480
Speaker 3: that I do carry around some resentment towards my wife

641
00:30:59,520 --> 00:31:01,600
Speaker 3: because of the events of the last two weeks and

642
00:31:01,640 --> 00:31:04,600
Speaker 3: that I should work on this, seen as she has

643
00:31:04,720 --> 00:31:07,560
Speaker 3: every right to call our current game plan into question

644
00:31:07,760 --> 00:31:10,560
Speaker 3: if it doesn't work for her anymore. But I need

645
00:31:10,680 --> 00:31:14,040
Speaker 3: room to transition. This work schedule is very recent. I'm

646
00:31:14,080 --> 00:31:17,560
Speaker 3: not even a full year in oh okay.

647
00:31:17,240 --> 00:31:19,560
Speaker 1: So yeah, they upped the time that he was away

648
00:31:19,600 --> 00:31:21,840
Speaker 1: a lot for this past like almost.

649
00:31:21,520 --> 00:31:24,200
Speaker 3: Year, so he's only been with He hasn't even been

650
00:31:24,240 --> 00:31:24,960
Speaker 3: with them a full year.

651
00:31:25,200 --> 00:31:29,080
Speaker 1: He has, but in the last almost year they changed

652
00:31:29,080 --> 00:31:30,960
Speaker 1: his schedule, so he's gone a lot more.

653
00:31:31,000 --> 00:31:31,600
Speaker 3: Oh.

654
00:31:31,640 --> 00:31:33,960
Speaker 1: So she was before like, oh, this is fine, like

655
00:31:34,040 --> 00:31:37,280
Speaker 1: this is manageable, and now he's gone way longer times

656
00:31:37,320 --> 00:31:39,239
Speaker 1: and his only home I think, like forty five day

657
00:31:39,320 --> 00:31:41,120
Speaker 1: chunks at a time, and then has gone the big

658
00:31:41,240 --> 00:31:43,440
Speaker 1: chunks again. Yeah, and he hasn't even been doing.

659
00:31:43,240 --> 00:31:44,360
Speaker 3: That schedule a year yet.

660
00:31:44,400 --> 00:31:45,360
Speaker 2: I don't know that that was.

661
00:31:45,320 --> 00:31:47,000
Speaker 1: The change that like caused the post.

662
00:31:47,080 --> 00:31:50,120
Speaker 2: Basically, I get it he loves his work, but it's like,

663
00:31:50,560 --> 00:31:52,239
Speaker 2: how much do you love your work compared how much

664
00:31:52,240 --> 00:31:54,600
Speaker 2: do you love your family? Yeah, like, or at least

665
00:31:54,680 --> 00:31:57,080
Speaker 2: I know, it's like, don't do like you can't switch immediately,

666
00:31:57,200 --> 00:31:59,120
Speaker 2: but you need to try and figure out a compromise

667
00:31:59,160 --> 00:32:02,720
Speaker 2: where it's like, yeah, okay, honey, next year, it'll change

668
00:32:02,720 --> 00:32:05,480
Speaker 2: because she's probably also just really tired of necessarily being

669
00:32:05,520 --> 00:32:08,240
Speaker 2: a single parent per se. But in a sense she

670
00:32:08,440 --> 00:32:11,880
Speaker 2: is a single parent because you're never there, so I yeah, and.

671
00:32:11,880 --> 00:32:14,400
Speaker 1: Even just in the sense of like you can't always

672
00:32:14,400 --> 00:32:16,800
Speaker 1: be there to talk to her, like be there for

673
00:32:16,840 --> 00:32:19,600
Speaker 1: her emotionally over the phone if you're not docked at port,

674
00:32:19,720 --> 00:32:21,720
Speaker 1: so like, who does she even have to talk with

675
00:32:21,880 --> 00:32:25,080
Speaker 1: about the kids or like about that stuff. Yeah, I

676
00:32:25,120 --> 00:32:27,480
Speaker 1: mean hopefully other family, But it's not the same.

677
00:32:27,720 --> 00:32:30,640
Speaker 3: It's just like, you know, in a perfect world, like

678
00:32:30,680 --> 00:32:33,000
Speaker 3: what would your life be like you're you know, three

679
00:32:33,040 --> 00:32:35,040
Speaker 3: months away from your kids and then you come back

680
00:32:35,040 --> 00:32:37,040
Speaker 3: for forty five days and then go back on see

681
00:32:37,080 --> 00:32:39,520
Speaker 3: for another like three months and then come back. Like

682
00:32:39,600 --> 00:32:42,640
Speaker 3: it's just what's priority here? And I think that's something

683
00:32:42,680 --> 00:32:46,120
Speaker 3: that ops to answer. And the previous arrangement was much

684
00:32:46,160 --> 00:32:48,720
Speaker 3: more in favor of family life, with more frequent and

685
00:32:48,840 --> 00:32:52,120
Speaker 3: longer home visits, also much less paid. Of course, I'm

686
00:32:52,120 --> 00:32:54,680
Speaker 3: already in the process of negotiating with my employer looking

687
00:32:54,680 --> 00:32:57,640
Speaker 3: at prospects of reappointment seeing as my work on the

688
00:32:57,720 --> 00:33:00,560
Speaker 3: drill ship is not compatible with my wife's plans. They

689
00:33:00,640 --> 00:33:04,000
Speaker 3: might agree with relocating me to another offshore platform closer

690
00:33:04,040 --> 00:33:07,040
Speaker 3: to home, maybe in the Gulf of Mexico, lending itself

691
00:33:07,040 --> 00:33:10,560
Speaker 3: to more time at home. It happens that contracts can

692
00:33:10,600 --> 00:33:13,040
Speaker 3: be revised in face of family troubles, and there are

693
00:33:13,080 --> 00:33:16,240
Speaker 3: provisions that take this into account. But it'll always come

694
00:33:16,280 --> 00:33:18,960
Speaker 3: down to time, and I'm not sure how much more

695
00:33:19,000 --> 00:33:20,880
Speaker 3: time she is willing to give me. If I come

696
00:33:20,920 --> 00:33:22,800
Speaker 3: to an agreement, I will bring this to the table

697
00:33:22,840 --> 00:33:25,479
Speaker 3: as my compromise. If she still refuses, then I can

698
00:33:25,480 --> 00:33:28,520
Speaker 3: propose the stationary position at the Port of Miami, which

699
00:33:28,560 --> 00:33:31,400
Speaker 3: would entail me moving there. This isn't a given either,

700
00:33:31,840 --> 00:33:33,960
Speaker 3: knowing that she would like to stay close to her

701
00:33:34,040 --> 00:33:36,320
Speaker 3: family than being local to the area we live in.

702
00:33:36,400 --> 00:33:39,920
Speaker 3: As a few commenters aptly appointed out, I have written

703
00:33:39,960 --> 00:33:42,840
Speaker 3: down all of my thoughts these last few hours. I've

704
00:33:42,840 --> 00:33:45,360
Speaker 3: got a clear strategy. I'll use this as a backdrop

705
00:33:45,440 --> 00:33:47,840
Speaker 3: the coming days and weeks. Final say will be hers.

706
00:33:47,920 --> 00:33:50,440
Speaker 3: If she still wants a divorce, she'll get one, and

707
00:33:50,480 --> 00:33:52,640
Speaker 3: I won't make it hard on her. I do recognize

708
00:33:52,640 --> 00:33:56,080
Speaker 3: the sacrifices she has made. These last years. After all,

709
00:33:56,120 --> 00:33:56,880
Speaker 3: there is an update.

710
00:33:57,000 --> 00:33:58,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm just gonna get rid of just how to

711
00:33:58,480 --> 00:33:59,560
Speaker 1: communicate these things.

712
00:33:59,680 --> 00:34:02,160
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, to just you know, I think the best

713
00:34:02,160 --> 00:34:05,040
Speaker 3: thing come up with the plan and then go from there.

714
00:34:05,080 --> 00:34:08,080
Speaker 3: And you know, and the plan doesn't have to be

715
00:34:08,120 --> 00:34:10,480
Speaker 3: set in stone. The plan can be flexibile, be like,

716
00:34:10,560 --> 00:34:13,840
Speaker 3: this is what I have, but we can make changes

717
00:34:13,920 --> 00:34:16,799
Speaker 3: to it based on what you want. You know, like

718
00:34:16,880 --> 00:34:19,200
Speaker 3: you got to be willing to like there's give and take,

719
00:34:19,239 --> 00:34:19,759
Speaker 3: give and take.

720
00:34:19,920 --> 00:34:23,080
Speaker 1: Yeah, and make the plan with her, Yeah, communicate ideas.

721
00:34:23,280 --> 00:34:26,520
Speaker 3: There's an update. A quick overview. My wife and I

722
00:34:26,560 --> 00:34:29,919
Speaker 3: started seeing a therapist, had three long sessions already who

723
00:34:30,160 --> 00:34:32,960
Speaker 3: is a true miracle worker. She's been pretty neutral, which

724
00:34:33,000 --> 00:34:35,480
Speaker 3: I initially found odd concerning the response I got from

725
00:34:35,520 --> 00:34:38,000
Speaker 3: a few mutual friends of ours and on Reddit. Does

726
00:34:38,120 --> 00:34:40,040
Speaker 3: allow her a lot of room to lay out her

727
00:34:40,040 --> 00:34:42,759
Speaker 3: troubles and concerns. He helps translate these in a way

728
00:34:42,800 --> 00:34:46,359
Speaker 3: that has offered me a fresh perspective on this troubled relationship.

729
00:34:46,440 --> 00:34:49,359
Speaker 3: It really comes down to creating a level of playing field. Oh,

730
00:34:49,400 --> 00:34:52,200
Speaker 3: a level playing field where my wife has an opportunity

731
00:34:52,239 --> 00:34:56,600
Speaker 3: to be heard. Communications gone haywire, Our therapists also signaled

732
00:34:56,680 --> 00:34:59,239
Speaker 3: that I sometimes seem a bit overbearing. My wife has

733
00:34:59,280 --> 00:35:03,280
Speaker 3: never put it this succinctly. No, but she could certainly

734
00:35:03,320 --> 00:35:06,880
Speaker 3: agree with that statement. She reached a boiling point and

735
00:35:07,080 --> 00:35:10,279
Speaker 3: could no longer play along with my fantasies while she

736
00:35:10,440 --> 00:35:13,440
Speaker 3: had to take the brunt of child rearing. That sounds

737
00:35:13,600 --> 00:35:17,120
Speaker 3: more than fair. I now wish A. She would have

738
00:35:17,160 --> 00:35:19,960
Speaker 3: told me much sooner and clearer, and B I wasn't

739
00:35:20,000 --> 00:35:23,480
Speaker 3: so emotionally detached that it disallowed me coming to this

740
00:35:23,640 --> 00:35:26,560
Speaker 3: fairly simple conclusion myself. I also ended up listening to

741
00:35:26,640 --> 00:35:27,920
Speaker 3: Cats in the Cradle by Harry.

742
00:35:28,560 --> 00:35:32,640
Speaker 1: Dude, you sound horrible now, you are not helping. She

743
00:35:32,719 --> 00:35:35,120
Speaker 1: really should have said this way more clearly, because then

744
00:35:35,160 --> 00:35:38,080
Speaker 1: maybe I wouldn't have been so aloof to not even

745
00:35:38,120 --> 00:35:41,920
Speaker 1: like recognize what was she told you. You've named earlier

746
00:35:42,000 --> 00:35:45,000
Speaker 1: conversations where she told you that exact thing.

747
00:35:45,400 --> 00:35:47,759
Speaker 2: That's crazy that he's that he's playing Cats in the

748
00:35:47,760 --> 00:35:53,760
Speaker 2: Cradle again, very sad song. But I'm we like, wait,

749
00:35:53,880 --> 00:35:56,359
Speaker 2: maybe this is eye opening and he's still start playing

750
00:35:56,400 --> 00:35:59,719
Speaker 2: Brandy again, Like wait, the sea is calling my name.

751
00:36:00,080 --> 00:36:02,760
Speaker 3: While I had heard the song before, I never dwelled

752
00:36:02,760 --> 00:36:06,320
Speaker 3: on it's true, meaning it hit home. It really reminded

753
00:36:06,360 --> 00:36:10,600
Speaker 3: me of my relation with my own father. Hopefully I'll

754
00:36:10,640 --> 00:36:12,879
Speaker 3: be the one to break the vicious cycle. She told

755
00:36:12,880 --> 00:36:15,320
Speaker 3: me that she still loves me and that she would

756
00:36:15,400 --> 00:36:18,640
Speaker 3: like me to remain part of family life with the kids.

757
00:36:18,800 --> 00:36:21,000
Speaker 3: I it looks like it's going in the right direction,

758
00:36:21,320 --> 00:36:21,840
Speaker 3: I hope.

759
00:36:21,880 --> 00:36:22,000
Speaker 6: So.

760
00:36:22,520 --> 00:36:25,279
Speaker 1: It feels like you were pretty wrapped up in your

761
00:36:25,360 --> 00:36:27,239
Speaker 1: job and career, and just like I need to make

762
00:36:27,280 --> 00:36:28,440
Speaker 1: it to this point. I need to make it to

763
00:36:28,480 --> 00:36:32,000
Speaker 1: this point that like, our family ties fell off quite

764
00:36:32,000 --> 00:36:34,200
Speaker 1: a bit, and now we're like, well, if only she

765
00:36:34,280 --> 00:36:36,680
Speaker 1: had told me that she was telling you that, Dude,

766
00:36:36,800 --> 00:36:39,880
Speaker 1: you said she was telling you that. Yeah, so maybe

767
00:36:39,920 --> 00:36:42,960
Speaker 1: this therapist is coming at a good time, and good

768
00:36:42,960 --> 00:36:45,720
Speaker 1: reflection could come, and I hope that we can figure

769
00:36:45,719 --> 00:36:47,120
Speaker 1: out a good solution for everybody.

770
00:36:47,160 --> 00:36:50,160
Speaker 3: The deployments remained the deal breaker, and she made it

771
00:36:50,200 --> 00:36:52,840
Speaker 3: clear that if I left on another three month assignment

772
00:36:52,880 --> 00:36:55,759
Speaker 3: two weeks from now, I would have lost my final chance.

773
00:36:55,760 --> 00:36:58,400
Speaker 3: I ended up conceding to her on that point. Mutual

774
00:36:58,440 --> 00:37:01,359
Speaker 3: compromise is indeed something that requires both parties to give

775
00:37:01,400 --> 00:37:04,400
Speaker 3: something up, and I hadn't really done much of that lately.

776
00:37:04,560 --> 00:37:08,440
Speaker 3: She nevertheless agreed to me getting a job shore side

777
00:37:08,640 --> 00:37:11,959
Speaker 3: and nailed that actually at a local port, even if

778
00:37:12,080 --> 00:37:15,280
Speaker 3: it entails us moving. I started negotiations with my employer

779
00:37:15,320 --> 00:37:19,360
Speaker 3: and ended up offering them something of an ultimated myself.

780
00:37:19,400 --> 00:37:22,920
Speaker 3: This did not go over well. I won't get into

781
00:37:22,960 --> 00:37:26,719
Speaker 3: details because of the character count of the sub, but

782
00:37:26,760 --> 00:37:29,200
Speaker 3: I'm currently somewhat out of a job and probably have

783
00:37:29,239 --> 00:37:32,280
Speaker 3: a lawsuit coming my way. The terms weren't as lenient

784
00:37:32,360 --> 00:37:36,799
Speaker 3: as I had expected. Goodbye oil industry, Hello dredging. I've

785
00:37:36,840 --> 00:37:40,400
Speaker 3: set my sights on a career in GA and hopefully

786
00:37:41,040 --> 00:37:44,600
Speaker 3: get to be part of the Savannah Harbor Expansive project.

787
00:37:45,160 --> 00:37:47,040
Speaker 3: It seems like things are going in the right direction

788
00:37:47,120 --> 00:37:50,160
Speaker 3: for now. Maybe not financially, but at least emotionally. There

789
00:37:50,239 --> 00:37:53,080
Speaker 3: is hope for my marriage and my capacity as a father. Finally,

790
00:37:53,239 --> 00:37:55,120
Speaker 3: I'd like to thank the SUB for showing me some

791
00:37:55,280 --> 00:37:57,840
Speaker 3: tough love and helping me find the right attitude to

792
00:37:57,880 --> 00:37:59,000
Speaker 3: go into therapy with.

793
00:37:59,239 --> 00:38:01,000
Speaker 6: And that's the end of the story. We're gonna go

794
00:38:01,000 --> 00:38:01,719
Speaker 6: to the next one.

795
00:38:02,600 --> 00:38:04,719
Speaker 2: Hey, it's Keon, your favorite Filipino.

796
00:38:04,760 --> 00:38:04,960
Speaker 6: Here.

797
00:38:05,080 --> 00:38:07,040
Speaker 2: We're going to get back to the stories. But here's

798
00:38:07,080 --> 00:38:08,680
Speaker 2: three minutes of ads from our sponsors.

799
00:38:09,440 --> 00:38:13,200
Speaker 8: My spoiled sister bled my parents try and they expected

800
00:38:13,239 --> 00:38:13,880
Speaker 8: me to fix it.

801
00:38:14,239 --> 00:38:16,440
Speaker 3: Uh ah, honey, you bet a back up.

802
00:38:16,880 --> 00:38:20,200
Speaker 8: My sister is the cliche of the spoiled rich Beverly

803
00:38:20,280 --> 00:38:24,120
Speaker 8: Hills type, just not in Beverly Hills. What she wants,

804
00:38:24,200 --> 00:38:26,520
Speaker 8: she gets and she'll do whatever she has to do

805
00:38:26,840 --> 00:38:29,120
Speaker 8: to get it without having to work for it. She

806
00:38:29,160 --> 00:38:30,560
Speaker 8: has made it clear to me that she is the

807
00:38:30,680 --> 00:38:34,600
Speaker 8: chosen one and I am nothing. My mentality through this

808
00:38:34,760 --> 00:38:36,879
Speaker 8: is that I don't care and I let her deal

809
00:38:36,960 --> 00:38:39,560
Speaker 8: with the issues that our parents have. By the way,

810
00:38:39,640 --> 00:38:42,040
Speaker 8: this comes from Justin Urn and if you want to

811
00:38:42,080 --> 00:38:45,080
Speaker 8: spit your odd stories, Curtly r slash Okay, storytime, separate it.

812
00:38:45,280 --> 00:38:48,799
Speaker 3: I'm Sophia, I'm Savannah, and we're here to give good advice.

813
00:38:48,840 --> 00:38:52,800
Speaker 8: Goofy, so please give us advice too, because we don't

814
00:38:52,800 --> 00:38:56,800
Speaker 8: know everything. We only know some things. And Opie says,

815
00:38:57,080 --> 00:38:59,919
Speaker 8: I'm good with my life. I have my degree, and Mike,

816
00:39:00,680 --> 00:39:04,479
Speaker 8: I'm good. I have had prior conversations with my mom

817
00:39:04,520 --> 00:39:07,319
Speaker 8: regarding this, and she seemed to maybe take into consideration

818
00:39:07,400 --> 00:39:10,520
Speaker 8: what I was saying and was maybe starting to work

819
00:39:10,560 --> 00:39:12,200
Speaker 8: to try and fix some of the issues that my

820
00:39:12,280 --> 00:39:15,520
Speaker 8: sister had. When it comes to my parents, really my

821
00:39:15,560 --> 00:39:18,680
Speaker 8: family in general, I don't actively seek any of them out.

822
00:39:19,120 --> 00:39:21,480
Speaker 8: I talk to my parents once a month. If I'm lucky,

823
00:39:21,960 --> 00:39:24,120
Speaker 8: I let them call, and usually it's one parent who

824
00:39:24,200 --> 00:39:27,799
Speaker 8: will relay any necessary information back to the other. We

825
00:39:27,920 --> 00:39:31,080
Speaker 8: also live almost three hours from each other, so that's

826
00:39:31,120 --> 00:39:34,640
Speaker 8: another reason why we don't talk. Apparently, the issues that

827
00:39:34,719 --> 00:39:37,799
Speaker 8: my parents have created with my sister have gone one

828
00:39:37,880 --> 00:39:40,480
Speaker 8: step further and are worse than they could ever be,

829
00:39:41,120 --> 00:39:43,279
Speaker 8: bad enough for my mother to drive three hours to

830
00:39:43,360 --> 00:39:46,759
Speaker 8: visit me. Imagine my surprise to open the door to

831
00:39:46,840 --> 00:39:49,440
Speaker 8: my house and see my mom on the other side.

832
00:39:50,120 --> 00:39:52,680
Speaker 8: In the conversation, she told me that she had heard

833
00:39:52,719 --> 00:39:56,000
Speaker 8: what I said about my sister being useless, and that

834
00:39:56,080 --> 00:39:59,399
Speaker 8: she was trying to slowly fix the problem. She thought

835
00:39:59,440 --> 00:40:01,920
Speaker 8: she was making headway until she found out her husband

836
00:40:01,960 --> 00:40:05,040
Speaker 8: had bought my sister a condo and was covering all

837
00:40:05,040 --> 00:40:08,200
Speaker 8: her expenses. I asked her why this mattered to me.

838
00:40:08,840 --> 00:40:10,840
Speaker 8: I reminded her that I was just an issue that

839
00:40:10,840 --> 00:40:11,319
Speaker 8: I ought to be.

840
00:40:11,280 --> 00:40:12,279
Speaker 3: Dealt with her.

841
00:40:12,320 --> 00:40:15,359
Speaker 8: In my dad's words, that explain me and my existence.

842
00:40:15,920 --> 00:40:20,160
Speaker 8: Dang these people stink. I reminded her that there was

843
00:40:20,200 --> 00:40:22,360
Speaker 8: nothing I could do to help them or fix the

844
00:40:22,400 --> 00:40:25,719
Speaker 8: problem they created. For the first time in my life,

845
00:40:25,880 --> 00:40:29,040
Speaker 8: my mom acknowledged this and acknowledged the way I was treated.

846
00:40:29,600 --> 00:40:31,880
Speaker 8: While she didn't really apologize, she did say that I

847
00:40:31,960 --> 00:40:34,640
Speaker 8: was treated pretty badly. She told me she was telling

848
00:40:34,640 --> 00:40:36,320
Speaker 8: me this because it needed to get out in the

849
00:40:36,400 --> 00:40:37,240
Speaker 8: open somewhere.

850
00:40:38,320 --> 00:40:39,040
Speaker 3: I had to ask my.

851
00:40:39,080 --> 00:40:42,320
Speaker 8: Mom some really hard questions, mostly because I was trying

852
00:40:42,320 --> 00:40:45,560
Speaker 8: in my own way to understand some of this. My parents'

853
00:40:45,560 --> 00:40:47,840
Speaker 8: marriage for the last few years has mostly been that

854
00:40:47,920 --> 00:40:50,600
Speaker 8: of roommates. Divorce for them is out of the question

855
00:40:50,719 --> 00:40:54,359
Speaker 8: because of how complicated their finances and estate are, and

856
00:40:54,400 --> 00:40:56,440
Speaker 8: if they were at a divorce it would be friendly.

857
00:40:57,080 --> 00:40:59,359
Speaker 8: They really don't love each other like they should. They

858
00:40:59,440 --> 00:41:01,839
Speaker 8: love each other as friends, but the marriage love is gone.

859
00:41:02,840 --> 00:41:05,040
Speaker 8: With that being said, I asked my mom the question,

860
00:41:05,520 --> 00:41:07,440
Speaker 8: have you her dad been sleeping around?

861
00:41:08,120 --> 00:41:08,960
Speaker 3: Do you really want to know?

862
00:41:09,040 --> 00:41:10,440
Speaker 1: Yeah? Why would you ask that?

863
00:41:10,680 --> 00:41:12,879
Speaker 3: Like, I don't even if it's true, I don't want

864
00:41:12,920 --> 00:41:13,120
Speaker 3: to know.

865
00:41:13,600 --> 00:41:16,200
Speaker 8: She immediately responded that she was not and that she

866
00:41:16,320 --> 00:41:19,319
Speaker 8: truly felt that Dad wasn't either. I asked her if

867
00:41:19,360 --> 00:41:21,879
Speaker 8: my sister had something she was holding over Dad's head,

868
00:41:22,520 --> 00:41:25,600
Speaker 8: and she asked what that could be. I asked her

869
00:41:25,640 --> 00:41:28,040
Speaker 8: if maybe Dad and my sister were in some kind

870
00:41:28,080 --> 00:41:31,440
Speaker 8: of unhealthy dynamic and she was blackmailing him to get

871
00:41:31,480 --> 00:41:34,520
Speaker 8: what she wanted, or she would go public. I told

872
00:41:34,560 --> 00:41:37,200
Speaker 8: her that up to this point, my sister has had

873
00:41:37,200 --> 00:41:41,160
Speaker 8: the normal spoiled kid things, card, credit cards, vacations and trips,

874
00:41:41,560 --> 00:41:43,799
Speaker 8: all of which my mom was also in on. This

875
00:41:43,920 --> 00:41:46,880
Speaker 8: purchase was more than any spoiled child could ever in

876
00:41:46,960 --> 00:41:50,360
Speaker 8: their life have. I reminded her that when I was eighteen,

877
00:41:50,440 --> 00:41:52,040
Speaker 8: I was told that I was on my own and

878
00:41:52,080 --> 00:41:54,719
Speaker 8: had to figure out life, and that my sister, at

879
00:41:54,760 --> 00:41:57,680
Speaker 8: twenty five, still has no idea how to be an adult.

880
00:41:58,320 --> 00:42:00,440
Speaker 8: It made me wonder what they were not telling me,

881
00:42:00,640 --> 00:42:03,040
Speaker 8: or what secrets they were keeping for my sister to

882
00:42:03,080 --> 00:42:06,319
Speaker 8: have this much power over them. Again, my mom said

883
00:42:06,360 --> 00:42:08,680
Speaker 8: that in her heart of hearts, this wasn't the case,

884
00:42:09,080 --> 00:42:12,319
Speaker 8: and that they just messed up pretty bad. She's like, no, no, no, no,

885
00:42:12,640 --> 00:42:15,400
Speaker 8: she's not holding any secret information.

886
00:42:15,600 --> 00:42:20,399
Speaker 3: We're just bad parents. Surprise. I didn't want to tell

887
00:42:20,400 --> 00:42:24,319
Speaker 3: you this way, but you asked, Yep, you did ask

888
00:42:25,000 --> 00:42:26,920
Speaker 3: I asked my mom what she expected me to do

889
00:42:26,960 --> 00:42:28,600
Speaker 3: about this and what she thought she was going to

890
00:42:28,680 --> 00:42:31,319
Speaker 3: gain by telling me this. She told me that she

891
00:42:31,400 --> 00:42:33,319
Speaker 3: knew I couldn't do anything about it, and that she

892
00:42:33,440 --> 00:42:35,839
Speaker 3: just needed to get it out in the open. I

893
00:42:35,880 --> 00:42:38,919
Speaker 3: asked her if she had confronted Dad, and she said

894
00:42:38,960 --> 00:42:41,200
Speaker 3: that his excuse was that he was trying to help

895
00:42:41,239 --> 00:42:43,560
Speaker 3: get my sister out of the house and that this

896
00:42:43,800 --> 00:42:46,640
Speaker 3: was the only way he felt he could. He said

897
00:42:46,680 --> 00:42:48,880
Speaker 3: that retirement for both of them was on the horizon

898
00:42:49,040 --> 00:42:51,000
Speaker 3: and that they would make the money back once they

899
00:42:51,040 --> 00:42:55,040
Speaker 3: liquidated and downsized. I told her that from their standpoint,

900
00:42:55,160 --> 00:42:58,560
Speaker 3: it would make sense, but that Dad forgot one main,

901
00:42:58,840 --> 00:43:02,560
Speaker 3: big issue, which is that my sister can't maintain herself.

902
00:43:03,239 --> 00:43:05,280
Speaker 3: Mom said that this was an issue she was trying

903
00:43:05,280 --> 00:43:08,120
Speaker 3: to work on with my sister. She had sought my

904
00:43:08,160 --> 00:43:10,040
Speaker 3: sister down and told her that she needed to work

905
00:43:10,080 --> 00:43:13,280
Speaker 3: at figuring out her future and was trying to encourage

906
00:43:13,280 --> 00:43:15,840
Speaker 3: her to get real estate license and go into the

907
00:43:15,840 --> 00:43:16,879
Speaker 3: family business.

908
00:43:17,400 --> 00:43:19,400
Speaker 8: I told my mom that I didn't want to know anything,

909
00:43:19,840 --> 00:43:22,120
Speaker 8: and that I just wanted to be done with all conversation.

910
00:43:22,280 --> 00:43:23,960
Speaker 8: I told her it made no sense for her to

911
00:43:24,000 --> 00:43:25,840
Speaker 8: tell me any of this, and I offered to let

912
00:43:25,880 --> 00:43:27,320
Speaker 8: her sleep in one of my guest rooms.

913
00:43:28,040 --> 00:43:30,680
Speaker 3: You'll make no sense. Go to bed, Go to your room.

914
00:43:30,760 --> 00:43:31,439
Speaker 3: Got to your room.

915
00:43:31,520 --> 00:43:31,800
Speaker 1: Mom.

916
00:43:32,239 --> 00:43:34,560
Speaker 8: She said that was okay, but that she had reservations

917
00:43:34,600 --> 00:43:37,040
Speaker 8: at a hotel. She left, and I went to bed angry.

918
00:43:37,760 --> 00:43:41,200
Speaker 8: This morning, I had my aha moment. I can't do

919
00:43:41,280 --> 00:43:43,160
Speaker 8: anything about it, and there's nothing I want to do

920
00:43:43,160 --> 00:43:43,600
Speaker 8: about it.

921
00:43:44,320 --> 00:43:49,560
Speaker 3: Oh that was like, wait a minute, I'm powerless. Hold on.

922
00:43:49,640 --> 00:43:51,919
Speaker 3: This is actually none of my issue here.

923
00:43:52,040 --> 00:43:55,560
Speaker 8: This is totally out of my control. This literally doesn't

924
00:43:55,600 --> 00:43:58,040
Speaker 8: even concern me. All I can do is let it

925
00:43:58,080 --> 00:44:00,319
Speaker 8: go in one ear and out the other. I have

926
00:44:00,320 --> 00:44:02,360
Speaker 8: nothing to offer, and even if I did, I'm pretty

927
00:44:02,360 --> 00:44:04,719
Speaker 8: sure I wouldn't. I guess, just like my mom, I

928
00:44:04,760 --> 00:44:06,200
Speaker 8: need to get this out in the open so it

929
00:44:06,239 --> 00:44:08,839
Speaker 8: doesn't have to sit with me anymore. And we've got

930
00:44:08,840 --> 00:44:10,320
Speaker 8: some comments, but too have any thoughts.

931
00:44:10,719 --> 00:44:14,200
Speaker 3: I don't know why they treat her so differently. Yeah,

932
00:44:14,560 --> 00:44:18,360
Speaker 3: golden child. Yeah, it could be golden child syndrome. It

933
00:44:18,400 --> 00:44:22,239
Speaker 3: could also be maybe a fair I'm not sure. Like

934
00:44:22,320 --> 00:44:26,720
Speaker 3: it does seem like maybe the sister does have maybe

935
00:44:26,719 --> 00:44:29,320
Speaker 3: some leverage on the parents, but I really don't know though.

936
00:44:29,400 --> 00:44:31,520
Speaker 3: None of it was really clear, and it seems like

937
00:44:31,600 --> 00:44:34,680
Speaker 3: everyone's kind of like no, no, no, pay for her.

938
00:44:34,840 --> 00:44:39,120
Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, I have some notes. Op has a career

939
00:44:39,160 --> 00:44:41,640
Speaker 3: and degree which equals Okay, I tried to do this.

940
00:44:42,280 --> 00:44:45,560
Speaker 3: I like it. Thanks Ope's sister. It was the only

941
00:44:45,640 --> 00:44:47,239
Speaker 3: one we got the age four, which was twenty five

942
00:44:47,239 --> 00:44:54,880
Speaker 3: female and she is entitled and annoying. And then Dad

943
00:44:55,200 --> 00:44:59,680
Speaker 3: covers everything. Yay, that was a little TLDR for anyone

944
00:44:59,719 --> 00:45:01,080
Speaker 3: not pay. There you go.

945
00:45:01,640 --> 00:45:04,719
Speaker 8: Comment one says more than likely the purpose of her

946
00:45:04,800 --> 00:45:07,520
Speaker 8: visit was to scope out the possibilities of you taking

947
00:45:07,560 --> 00:45:11,120
Speaker 8: over the maintenance of your sister. Oh Pie says that'll

948
00:45:11,120 --> 00:45:13,400
Speaker 8: never happen. I want nothing to do with my sister.

949
00:45:14,000 --> 00:45:16,239
Speaker 8: I told my mom in a prior conversation that I

950
00:45:16,280 --> 00:45:19,080
Speaker 8: want to be no contact with my sister and to

951
00:45:19,239 --> 00:45:22,279
Speaker 8: keep her away from me. She brings no value to

952
00:45:22,320 --> 00:45:24,400
Speaker 8: my life and I have no need for her. What

953
00:45:24,560 --> 00:45:26,680
Speaker 8: sucks is that there is nothing wrong with her. Her

954
00:45:26,719 --> 00:45:29,920
Speaker 8: ambitions are to shop in vacation. All she knows how

955
00:45:29,920 --> 00:45:31,759
Speaker 8: to do is swipe a credit card and have her

956
00:45:31,840 --> 00:45:34,960
Speaker 8: nails done. This is the end result of my parents

957
00:45:35,000 --> 00:45:37,319
Speaker 8: raising her good luck to them is all I have

958
00:45:37,400 --> 00:45:40,959
Speaker 8: to say and reply. Then they'll probably try to marry

959
00:45:40,960 --> 00:45:42,560
Speaker 8: her off to someone who can keep her in the

960
00:45:42,560 --> 00:45:46,360
Speaker 8: custom to which she has become accustomed. Oh Pie says,

961
00:45:46,400 --> 00:45:48,840
Speaker 8: I told my sister this. I told her that she

962
00:45:48,920 --> 00:45:50,799
Speaker 8: needs to look for a rich man to marry so

963
00:45:50,880 --> 00:45:53,640
Speaker 8: that she'll be taken care of. My parents are healthy

964
00:45:53,680 --> 00:45:55,960
Speaker 8: and in their late fifties. They have plenty of time.

965
00:45:56,520 --> 00:45:58,760
Speaker 8: But if she still isn't working when they do pass,

966
00:45:58,920 --> 00:46:02,719
Speaker 8: I give her two years until she's broke. Common two says,

967
00:46:02,760 --> 00:46:05,200
Speaker 8: I'm probably being dramatic, but she reminds me of the

968
00:46:05,239 --> 00:46:08,959
Speaker 8: spoiled children who unlive their parents when they get cut

969
00:46:08,960 --> 00:46:10,239
Speaker 8: off to get the inheritance.

970
00:46:10,280 --> 00:46:13,120
Speaker 3: WHOA, I even know that was a thing. That is

971
00:46:13,239 --> 00:46:18,560
Speaker 3: quite the drama. Wow, But with your question, she randomly

972
00:46:18,600 --> 00:46:21,920
Speaker 3: throws being the sole heir to your parent's fortune, she

973
00:46:22,000 --> 00:46:24,799
Speaker 3: feels entitled to a two hundred k salary without any

974
00:46:24,920 --> 00:46:28,000
Speaker 3: education or work experience. Just straight up delusional.

975
00:46:28,239 --> 00:46:28,600
Speaker 6: I don't know.

976
00:46:28,680 --> 00:46:29,600
Speaker 3: Your parents may not be.

977
00:46:29,600 --> 00:46:34,480
Speaker 8: Safe, Opie says, I can't see that ever happening, and

978
00:46:34,520 --> 00:46:36,759
Speaker 8: I'll tell you why. The funny side of it is

979
00:46:36,760 --> 00:46:39,439
Speaker 8: that it would get her nails dirty. The serious side

980
00:46:39,520 --> 00:46:41,279
Speaker 8: is that she knows I'm a nurse, she knows I

981
00:46:41,320 --> 00:46:43,720
Speaker 8: have some connections, and that our parents are only fifty

982
00:46:43,719 --> 00:46:46,239
Speaker 8: five and healthy. She knows that if anything were to

983
00:46:46,280 --> 00:46:48,960
Speaker 8: happen to them, I would have an investigation open faster

984
00:46:49,080 --> 00:46:52,200
Speaker 8: than a credit card approval, and she would automatically be

985
00:46:52,280 --> 00:46:53,040
Speaker 8: a prime.

986
00:46:52,960 --> 00:46:54,760
Speaker 3: Suspect because of their state.

987
00:46:55,880 --> 00:46:58,919
Speaker 8: And we've got an update, folks, But uh, those were

988
00:46:59,000 --> 00:47:00,960
Speaker 8: some imagine comments.

989
00:47:01,800 --> 00:47:05,520
Speaker 3: I think she's just spoiled, not a sociopath. Update.

990
00:47:05,840 --> 00:47:07,920
Speaker 8: It was mentioned in one of my responses to another

991
00:47:07,960 --> 00:47:11,560
Speaker 8: comment about the potential of my sister leading my parents dry,

992
00:47:11,760 --> 00:47:14,520
Speaker 8: them losing everything and then maybe moving in with me.

993
00:47:15,160 --> 00:47:16,600
Speaker 3: This will never happen.

994
00:47:17,200 --> 00:47:19,640
Speaker 8: This was the hilarity of them going from opulence to

995
00:47:19,680 --> 00:47:22,600
Speaker 8: living in a three bedroom double wide in a trailer park.

996
00:47:23,239 --> 00:47:25,760
Speaker 8: If this were to ever happen, and I can assure

997
00:47:25,800 --> 00:47:28,840
Speaker 8: you it won't, I would be a dictator. My answer

998
00:47:28,840 --> 00:47:30,640
Speaker 8: to any of their complaints would be to hold the

999
00:47:30,680 --> 00:47:33,120
Speaker 8: door open and tell them they're free to leave, that

1000
00:47:33,239 --> 00:47:35,439
Speaker 8: I don't want them there to begin with. I would

1001
00:47:35,520 --> 00:47:38,279
Speaker 8: introduce them to people as my issues that need to

1002
00:47:38,280 --> 00:47:41,200
Speaker 8: be dealt with. But again, I cannot stress this enough.

1003
00:47:41,640 --> 00:47:45,160
Speaker 8: This will never happen. Loel, I'm hoping that this is

1004
00:47:45,200 --> 00:47:48,080
Speaker 8: the last entry to this situation. I read each and

1005
00:47:48,120 --> 00:47:49,960
Speaker 8: every one of the responses and a replied to a

1006
00:47:49,960 --> 00:47:52,479
Speaker 8: few of them, and with that being said, I did

1007
00:47:52,480 --> 00:47:54,759
Speaker 8: what so many of you said I needed to do.

1008
00:47:55,239 --> 00:47:59,759
Speaker 8: I've officially gone no contact again. I was going to

1009
00:47:59,800 --> 00:48:02,160
Speaker 8: do and update this Saturday, but time got away from

1010
00:48:02,200 --> 00:48:05,480
Speaker 8: me and I just didn't have the time. Saturday, I

1011
00:48:05,520 --> 00:48:07,759
Speaker 8: sent a long email to all three of them on

1012
00:48:07,800 --> 00:48:10,320
Speaker 8: the same thread. I told them that I was done,

1013
00:48:10,880 --> 00:48:12,840
Speaker 8: that there is no reason for me to be involved

1014
00:48:12,840 --> 00:48:15,240
Speaker 8: in the family, and that they are to no longer

1015
00:48:15,360 --> 00:48:18,960
Speaker 8: contact me. I put everything out there. I told them

1016
00:48:18,960 --> 00:48:21,080
Speaker 8: that they have no reason or excuse to tell me

1017
00:48:21,160 --> 00:48:23,640
Speaker 8: any of this since I was just an issue to

1018
00:48:23,640 --> 00:48:25,879
Speaker 8: be dealt with, and I told them that I bring

1019
00:48:25,920 --> 00:48:28,879
Speaker 8: no value or purpose to their lives and I don't

1020
00:48:28,960 --> 00:48:31,320
Speaker 8: understand why they still talk to me at this point.

1021
00:48:31,800 --> 00:48:34,400
Speaker 8: I also told them exactly what I thought about my sister.

1022
00:48:34,800 --> 00:48:38,080
Speaker 8: I didn't ull back. I told all three of them

1023
00:48:38,160 --> 00:48:40,840
Speaker 8: that I hated E from the pits of my soul,

1024
00:48:41,440 --> 00:48:43,359
Speaker 8: that she has been nothing but cruel to me, that

1025
00:48:43,360 --> 00:48:46,359
Speaker 8: she serves no purpose or brings any value to my life,

1026
00:48:46,880 --> 00:48:48,759
Speaker 8: and that if I never spoke to her again, I

1027
00:48:48,760 --> 00:48:51,680
Speaker 8: would be perfectly happy with this. I told them that

1028
00:48:51,800 --> 00:48:55,319
Speaker 8: if she were to pass away tomorrow, I wouldn't shed

1029
00:48:55,360 --> 00:48:57,960
Speaker 8: a tear and that I would most likely just pee.

1030
00:48:57,719 --> 00:49:02,080
Speaker 3: On her grave. WHOA, it's harsh, Gie, I think you

1031
00:49:02,160 --> 00:49:04,440
Speaker 3: made me need their repeat. I don't think that you

1032
00:49:04,520 --> 00:49:05,880
Speaker 3: needed to go into that.

1033
00:49:06,800 --> 00:49:09,080
Speaker 8: I told them that I didn't understand why they felt

1034
00:49:09,080 --> 00:49:12,520
Speaker 8: the need to constantly tell me about the problems they created,

1035
00:49:13,120 --> 00:49:14,920
Speaker 8: or why they feel the need to ask me how

1036
00:49:14,960 --> 00:49:17,600
Speaker 8: to fix it. They did this all to themselves, and

1037
00:49:17,640 --> 00:49:20,640
Speaker 8: while my sister didn't have to do anything, I had

1038
00:49:20,680 --> 00:49:23,480
Speaker 8: to do everything. I reminded them that I got a

1039
00:49:23,560 --> 00:49:25,960
Speaker 8: job the first chance I could when I was fifteen,

1040
00:49:26,560 --> 00:49:29,240
Speaker 8: worked to put myself through college, and I've been working

1041
00:49:29,280 --> 00:49:32,319
Speaker 8: at the same hospital for the last five years. I

1042
00:49:32,360 --> 00:49:35,080
Speaker 8: got my degree and a house. She has nothing and

1043
00:49:35,200 --> 00:49:38,600
Speaker 8: can't do anything without their help. I reiterated that I will,

1044
00:49:38,680 --> 00:49:42,400
Speaker 8: under no circumstances help them fix the mess that they created,

1045
00:49:43,000 --> 00:49:45,600
Speaker 8: and I reminded my sister that when she blows through

1046
00:49:45,600 --> 00:49:48,439
Speaker 8: the estate and has nothing to live on, she will

1047
00:49:48,480 --> 00:49:51,839
Speaker 8: never be welcome on my property. I did however, take

1048
00:49:51,840 --> 00:49:54,640
Speaker 8: it a step further, a step further than that.

1049
00:49:55,400 --> 00:49:59,040
Speaker 3: And saying you would pee on her grave. For as

1050
00:49:59,080 --> 00:50:02,400
Speaker 3: long as I can re they have talked about retirement, travel,

1051
00:50:02,520 --> 00:50:05,640
Speaker 3: and hanging out with the grandkids. Here's the kicker.

1052
00:50:06,360 --> 00:50:10,799
Speaker 8: I'm gay, so they are not getting any grandkids from me,

1053
00:50:11,400 --> 00:50:13,600
Speaker 8: and even if I were to adopt, they would never

1054
00:50:13,680 --> 00:50:16,600
Speaker 8: accept my children because it's not the bloodline.

1055
00:50:16,640 --> 00:50:20,080
Speaker 3: So my sisters their only hope for any grandchildren. And

1056
00:50:20,120 --> 00:50:23,600
Speaker 3: I told them this, You've always talked about retirement and grandkids.

1057
00:50:23,880 --> 00:50:26,160
Speaker 3: You do realize I'm attracted to the same gender and

1058
00:50:26,239 --> 00:50:29,080
Speaker 3: have no chance of achieving this. With that being said,

1059
00:50:29,280 --> 00:50:32,640
Speaker 3: your only hope for grandkids is my sister. Let me

1060
00:50:32,680 --> 00:50:33,480
Speaker 3: know how that goes.

1061
00:50:34,280 --> 00:50:36,960
Speaker 8: We don't come from any kind of culture that recognizes

1062
00:50:37,080 --> 00:50:39,480
Speaker 8: arranged marriage. But now that I have put this in

1063
00:50:39,520 --> 00:50:42,160
Speaker 8: my parents' head, I can almost assure you that they're

1064
00:50:42,200 --> 00:50:44,000
Speaker 8: going to have to find a way for my sister

1065
00:50:44,080 --> 00:50:47,080
Speaker 8: to provide them with this. I'm certain that she will,

1066
00:50:47,160 --> 00:50:49,960
Speaker 8: one way or another be set up. I sent the email,

1067
00:50:50,040 --> 00:50:52,520
Speaker 8: I attached red receipts, and when I got all three

1068
00:50:52,520 --> 00:50:53,440
Speaker 8: receipts back.

1069
00:50:53,560 --> 00:50:56,640
Speaker 3: I have blocked them all on social media. Platforms and

1070
00:50:56,719 --> 00:50:57,560
Speaker 3: their phone numbers.

1071
00:50:57,960 --> 00:51:00,120
Speaker 8: The only way for them to get in contact with

1072
00:51:00,160 --> 00:51:02,120
Speaker 8: me is to show up at my house and I

1073
00:51:02,160 --> 00:51:04,480
Speaker 8: can't see that happening, but if they do, I will

1074
00:51:04,520 --> 00:51:07,480
Speaker 8: have them removed. Many of you have wondered why I

1075
00:51:07,560 --> 00:51:10,040
Speaker 8: kept in contact with them. The truth is I have

1076
00:51:10,120 --> 00:51:11,359
Speaker 8: gone no contact with.

1077
00:51:11,320 --> 00:51:14,040
Speaker 3: Them many times, and they always find a way to

1078
00:51:14,080 --> 00:51:15,360
Speaker 3: weasel their way back.

1079
00:51:15,200 --> 00:51:17,839
Speaker 8: Into my life. For a while, it wasn't that bad,

1080
00:51:17,960 --> 00:51:20,279
Speaker 8: and it was tolerable. But now that they have upped

1081
00:51:20,320 --> 00:51:23,279
Speaker 8: the any it's time to take a different approach. This

1082
00:51:23,480 --> 00:51:25,920
Speaker 8: was what led me to send the email. I didn't

1083
00:51:25,920 --> 00:51:28,480
Speaker 8: wait for them to respond. I have no reason to

1084
00:51:28,520 --> 00:51:31,359
Speaker 8: look for any kind of response, and I truly don't

1085
00:51:31,360 --> 00:51:34,200
Speaker 8: want to hear from them. At some point or another,

1086
00:51:34,280 --> 00:51:36,640
Speaker 8: I need some kind of peace in my life and

1087
00:51:36,760 --> 00:51:38,200
Speaker 8: I'll never get it with them.

1088
00:51:38,600 --> 00:51:42,279
Speaker 3: Oh thank you, And that's the end of that story.

1089
00:51:42,640 --> 00:51:45,000
Speaker 3: I'm glad you are not gonna have them in your

1090
00:51:45,040 --> 00:51:45,600
Speaker 3: life anymore.

1091
00:51:46,239 --> 00:51:48,040
Speaker 1: And that's the end of this story. We're gonna go

1092
00:51:48,040 --> 00:51:52,120
Speaker 1: to the next one. Hey, it's Carly, your favorite Jersey girl.

1093
00:51:52,160 --> 00:51:53,200
Speaker 3: Here. We're going to.

1094
00:51:53,120 --> 00:51:54,160
Speaker 1: Get back to the stories.

1095
00:51:54,200 --> 00:51:55,080
Speaker 3: But here's three.

1096
00:51:54,920 --> 00:51:56,520
Speaker 6: Minutes of ads from our sponsors.

1097
00:51:57,640 --> 00:52:01,560
Speaker 3: My grandmother manipulated us into signing away our inheritance.

1098
00:52:02,120 --> 00:52:05,200
Speaker 9: For years, we had no idea, Grandma, why do you

1099
00:52:05,280 --> 00:52:08,560
Speaker 9: even need the inheritance? I, thirty two male, and my

1100
00:52:08,640 --> 00:52:12,120
Speaker 9: sister thirty four female, just found out my grandma manipulated

1101
00:52:12,200 --> 00:52:14,439
Speaker 9: us into signing away my dad's inheritance.

1102
00:52:15,000 --> 00:52:17,480
Speaker 3: Our mom passed away when I was fifteen. We got

1103
00:52:17,480 --> 00:52:22,200
Speaker 3: Social Security survivors benefits monthly until eighteen. Mine would have

1104
00:52:22,280 --> 00:52:25,279
Speaker 3: totaled about twenty seven K. I was told it was

1105
00:52:25,320 --> 00:52:29,680
Speaker 3: being saved until I was eighteen. Dad meets step they

1106
00:52:29,760 --> 00:52:32,920
Speaker 3: get together, and then I'm told that it's being saved

1107
00:52:32,920 --> 00:52:37,440
Speaker 3: for college. Then as college approached, it becomes that money

1108
00:52:37,480 --> 00:52:41,120
Speaker 3: we spent to put a roof over your head. That's illegal.

1109
00:52:41,880 --> 00:52:46,279
Speaker 3: By the way, this comes from Jeff Wordstrom. And if

1110
00:52:46,280 --> 00:52:47,640
Speaker 3: you want to submit your own stories, got at our

1111
00:52:47,640 --> 00:52:50,840
Speaker 3: slash Okay, story time subarated. I'm Savannah, I'm Sophia, I'm Curly.

1112
00:52:51,040 --> 00:52:53,520
Speaker 3: We're here to give some advice. You're here to listen,

1113
00:52:53,560 --> 00:52:55,400
Speaker 3: but we also want you to give advice in that

1114
00:52:55,520 --> 00:52:58,279
Speaker 3: little tiny box right there, because I want to read

1115
00:52:58,320 --> 00:53:00,600
Speaker 3: it and then I want to, I don't know, maybe

1116
00:53:00,600 --> 00:53:03,200
Speaker 3: make fun of it. Or something. Who knows. We'll see

1117
00:53:03,239 --> 00:53:06,560
Speaker 3: what happens with it. But OP says, mind you my

1118
00:53:06,640 --> 00:53:08,320
Speaker 3: dad in step something.

1119
00:53:08,560 --> 00:53:14,080
Speaker 1: I would assume mother if he's not by because they

1120
00:53:14,080 --> 00:53:15,240
Speaker 1: previously had a mother.

1121
00:53:16,200 --> 00:53:20,080
Speaker 3: That makes sense made six figures a year each at

1122
00:53:20,080 --> 00:53:23,760
Speaker 3: the time with a sub two hundred k house. Wow,

1123
00:53:24,200 --> 00:53:28,440
Speaker 3: so I just wrote that money off. Things were tumultuous

1124
00:53:28,480 --> 00:53:31,960
Speaker 3: with my step because she played nice until we moved together,

1125
00:53:32,440 --> 00:53:36,480
Speaker 3: which required me going to a new school again. She

1126
00:53:36,560 --> 00:53:41,080
Speaker 3: then went full dictator, took my car, crazy roles and

1127
00:53:41,200 --> 00:53:44,359
Speaker 3: all while I had straight a's AP courses, never been

1128
00:53:44,360 --> 00:53:47,319
Speaker 3: in trouble at school, where as her adopted daughter, three

1129
00:53:47,320 --> 00:53:50,440
Speaker 3: and a half years younger, was constantly failing and getting suspended.

1130
00:53:50,760 --> 00:53:53,400
Speaker 3: But clearly her parenting method was superior in her eyes

1131
00:53:53,520 --> 00:53:56,320
Speaker 3: because of that. Lots more backstory, but to keep this short,

1132
00:53:56,719 --> 00:53:59,760
Speaker 3: I moved in and out a few times before eighteen.

1133
00:54:00,360 --> 00:54:04,799
Speaker 8: Yes, my daughter is superior, she questions authority, and I

1134
00:54:05,000 --> 00:54:05,600
Speaker 8: support that.

1135
00:54:06,239 --> 00:54:10,280
Speaker 3: That's why she's suspended, staying with friends, et cetera. Started

1136
00:54:10,280 --> 00:54:12,720
Speaker 3: working at sixteen, moved back home to go to college,

1137
00:54:13,000 --> 00:54:15,920
Speaker 3: and halfway through the second semester she out with two

1138
00:54:15,960 --> 00:54:18,640
Speaker 3: days notice. Had to drop out get a full time

1139
00:54:18,719 --> 00:54:21,120
Speaker 3: job after quitting my good full time job for college,

1140
00:54:21,760 --> 00:54:24,759
Speaker 3: and after that, I never looked back, made my way

1141
00:54:24,880 --> 00:54:26,840
Speaker 3: for myself. Yikes.

1142
00:54:27,000 --> 00:54:30,440
Speaker 8: Ope, especially when you had money set aside for you.

1143
00:54:30,880 --> 00:54:35,719
Speaker 3: Yeah. Now it's just like stolen, stolen, gone, nothing to do,

1144
00:54:35,880 --> 00:54:38,839
Speaker 3: and now we're just on a big struggle bus. When

1145
00:54:38,880 --> 00:54:40,799
Speaker 3: I was twenty one to twenty two, my dad and

1146
00:54:40,840 --> 00:54:44,239
Speaker 3: I reconnected. He finally admitted to all the double standards

1147
00:54:44,280 --> 00:54:48,080
Speaker 3: her kid versus us that he always defended to not

1148
00:54:48,200 --> 00:54:52,399
Speaker 3: throw stepmother under the bus even though it was all her.

1149
00:54:52,680 --> 00:54:56,480
Speaker 3: My dad was awesome when she wasn't involved, et cetera.

1150
00:54:57,000 --> 00:55:01,759
Speaker 3: And they had actually separated. Not too long after that

1151
00:55:01,880 --> 00:55:03,400
Speaker 3: he passed from liver failure.

1152
00:55:03,880 --> 00:55:06,480
Speaker 2: Oh no, this.

1153
00:55:06,400 --> 00:55:10,920
Speaker 3: Is taking a time that I don't want it to take. Stop, Opie.

1154
00:55:11,160 --> 00:55:15,080
Speaker 3: He was a drinker. But there's more there with what

1155
00:55:15,280 --> 00:55:19,080
Speaker 3: her job was, but we're not getting into those theories.

1156
00:55:18,920 --> 00:55:23,719
Speaker 3: Does that mean so she had bartender, he maybe poisoned him.

1157
00:55:24,560 --> 00:55:27,480
Speaker 3: What does that mean? I don't know what mean job entails.

1158
00:55:28,560 --> 00:55:31,239
Speaker 3: I don't know. There's like many side stories that I

1159
00:55:31,280 --> 00:55:35,160
Speaker 3: would like to go on, but seems we're only going

1160
00:55:35,160 --> 00:55:37,959
Speaker 3: to get the big long one. So I was told

1161
00:55:37,960 --> 00:55:41,440
Speaker 3: by my grandma, his mom that I was willed just

1162
00:55:41,640 --> 00:55:45,400
Speaker 3: this boat that he had bought shortly before our reconnection.

1163
00:55:45,719 --> 00:55:49,160
Speaker 3: Oh so you got a boat, But boats are so much,

1164
00:55:49,440 --> 00:55:54,160
Speaker 3: They're so expensive to maintain. Yes, you just got more debt.

1165
00:55:54,800 --> 00:55:57,040
Speaker 3: We had bonded over it since he had to keep

1166
00:55:57,080 --> 00:55:59,759
Speaker 3: it at my house because he wasn't allowed to at

1167
00:55:59,760 --> 00:56:04,279
Speaker 3: his house. Step But it being what was willed to

1168
00:56:04,360 --> 00:56:06,719
Speaker 3: me seems strange, considering he thought he had given me

1169
00:56:06,760 --> 00:56:09,440
Speaker 3: the boat before he passed. He forgot to sign the title.

1170
00:56:10,080 --> 00:56:12,279
Speaker 3: But still I didn't think much of it. I was

1171
00:56:12,360 --> 00:56:15,000
Speaker 3: just sad about my dad. Then I'm told I have

1172
00:56:15,080 --> 00:56:17,680
Speaker 3: to buy it from the estate because taxes are owed

1173
00:56:17,719 --> 00:56:21,480
Speaker 3: from his retirement pullouts. I also find out my stepmother

1174
00:56:21,960 --> 00:56:24,040
Speaker 3: pulled the rest of the money out of his retirement

1175
00:56:24,160 --> 00:56:28,280
Speaker 3: right before he passed, since she still had access because

1176
00:56:28,320 --> 00:56:32,400
Speaker 3: they were technically still married, and that she was getting

1177
00:56:32,440 --> 00:56:35,080
Speaker 3: the house. I tried to go to mediation with her

1178
00:56:35,120 --> 00:56:38,080
Speaker 3: to get her to pay the taxes, but she basically said,

1179
00:56:38,239 --> 00:56:41,279
Speaker 3: go after yourself. She's keeping it all and we're paying

1180
00:56:41,320 --> 00:56:44,839
Speaker 3: the taxes. My aunt got my dad's classic car. He

1181
00:56:44,920 --> 00:56:47,760
Speaker 3: really wanted her to have it. That was worth about

1182
00:56:47,960 --> 00:56:50,719
Speaker 3: twelve to fifteen K because it needed a repair, and

1183
00:56:50,760 --> 00:56:52,879
Speaker 3: she was able to buy it for two K from

1184
00:56:52,880 --> 00:56:55,600
Speaker 3: the estate, whereas for me to buy the boat, it

1185
00:56:55,719 --> 00:56:58,600
Speaker 3: was thirty five hundred, which was pretty much the max

1186
00:56:58,640 --> 00:57:01,600
Speaker 3: it was worth on a good day. I was broke,

1187
00:57:01,640 --> 00:57:04,680
Speaker 3: so I couldn't buy it. I didn't understand the price disparity.

1188
00:57:04,719 --> 00:57:08,000
Speaker 3: But again, my dad being gone was really my focus.

1189
00:57:08,640 --> 00:57:11,040
Speaker 3: And while I don't hold grudges, I literally can't bring

1190
00:57:11,080 --> 00:57:15,560
Speaker 3: myself to usually I've held one against my stepmother ever since.

1191
00:57:16,280 --> 00:57:18,560
Speaker 3: But something that was always weird to me was that

1192
00:57:18,600 --> 00:57:21,640
Speaker 3: my grandma always got super defensive when we brought up

1193
00:57:21,640 --> 00:57:25,960
Speaker 3: how frustrating all that was. Because my stepmom made plenty

1194
00:57:25,960 --> 00:57:28,480
Speaker 3: of money, me and my sister were broke, and she

1195
00:57:28,600 --> 00:57:30,880
Speaker 3: definitely didn't need the money, but still went out of

1196
00:57:30,880 --> 00:57:34,920
Speaker 3: her way to take everything. So fast forward almost ten years.

1197
00:57:35,160 --> 00:57:39,160
Speaker 3: Side note, the car my aunt had just had to

1198
00:57:39,280 --> 00:57:43,240
Speaker 3: have is still sitting broken and untouched. Grandma calls one

1199
00:57:43,360 --> 00:57:45,160
Speaker 3: night to tell me my sister will be bringing a

1200
00:57:45,200 --> 00:57:47,200
Speaker 3: paper she signed that I need to sign for a

1201
00:57:47,240 --> 00:57:50,440
Speaker 3: property my aunt was selling. I was fine with it.

1202
00:57:50,880 --> 00:57:53,960
Speaker 3: My aunt allegedly needed money. Her and her uncle are

1203
00:57:53,960 --> 00:57:56,800
Speaker 3: perpetually in need of money, but are also the people

1204
00:57:56,800 --> 00:57:59,120
Speaker 3: who refinance their house when I was a kid to

1205
00:57:59,120 --> 00:58:03,120
Speaker 3: buy a big screen and every video game console. Well,

1206
00:58:03,200 --> 00:58:07,360
Speaker 3: you know, uh, there's wants and there's needs. Sometimes he

1207
00:58:07,600 --> 00:58:13,040
Speaker 3: is it sometimes you need, you need. But then she

1208
00:58:13,160 --> 00:58:16,280
Speaker 3: mentioned it needed to be notarized and sent next day

1209
00:58:17,120 --> 00:58:19,920
Speaker 3: as the buyer was waiting. I was a little annoyed

1210
00:58:20,040 --> 00:58:22,480
Speaker 3: as I run my own business and last minute notarizing

1211
00:58:22,480 --> 00:58:25,160
Speaker 3: and mailing stuff wasn't on my schedule, but I was

1212
00:58:25,200 --> 00:58:28,080
Speaker 3: still going to make the time to help. I was

1213
00:58:28,160 --> 00:58:31,520
Speaker 3: also kind of confused why this was such a serious thing,

1214
00:58:31,840 --> 00:58:35,480
Speaker 3: since she made it sound like a formality. When I asked,

1215
00:58:35,600 --> 00:58:37,600
Speaker 3: she said it was because the property was still in

1216
00:58:37,640 --> 00:58:40,360
Speaker 3: my dad's name. She tried to change it after he passed,

1217
00:58:40,400 --> 00:58:43,760
Speaker 3: which wouldn't work clearly, and that we were his heirs,

1218
00:58:43,800 --> 00:58:46,520
Speaker 3: so we just had to say we wouldn't try to

1219
00:58:46,520 --> 00:58:49,760
Speaker 3: claim it down the road. Now, this was the first

1220
00:58:49,840 --> 00:58:52,400
Speaker 3: time I was ever told we were his sole heirs.

1221
00:58:52,720 --> 00:58:56,200
Speaker 3: I was told I was willed specifically and only the boat,

1222
00:58:56,280 --> 00:58:58,440
Speaker 3: and in the end we got nothing when he passed.

1223
00:58:59,320 --> 00:59:02,840
Speaker 3: Despite my skepticism, I was still going to let it go.

1224
00:59:03,720 --> 00:59:07,080
Speaker 3: I'm fortunately doing fine for myself and I'll do my

1225
00:59:07,080 --> 00:59:10,280
Speaker 3: part to help family. But the next morning I got

1226
00:59:10,320 --> 00:59:13,439
Speaker 3: a spam text addressed to my sister saying, your home

1227
00:59:13,480 --> 00:59:17,280
Speaker 3: report for xxx address is ready, which was the house

1228
00:59:17,360 --> 00:59:21,720
Speaker 3: my stepmom got and still lives in. Oh, so you

1229
00:59:21,800 --> 00:59:22,840
Speaker 3: own her house?

1230
00:59:24,760 --> 00:59:28,160
Speaker 8: I would immediately, I would immediately put I wouldn't say anything.

1231
00:59:28,520 --> 00:59:31,040
Speaker 8: I go to arouse, put in an eviction notice or

1232
00:59:31,080 --> 00:59:34,160
Speaker 8: like a like a household or something like that.

1233
00:59:34,600 --> 00:59:35,440
Speaker 3: Put it right in the yard.

1234
00:59:35,560 --> 00:59:35,760
Speaker 1: Yeah.

1235
00:59:36,840 --> 00:59:39,680
Speaker 3: So I thought my sister felt this was fishy and

1236
00:59:39,880 --> 00:59:43,080
Speaker 3: was doing some digging. She wasn't. Actually just a complete coincidence.

1237
00:59:43,720 --> 00:59:44,640
Speaker 3: Well you need.

1238
00:59:44,520 --> 00:59:49,200
Speaker 8: To dig, dig a little deeper, grab a shovel, lady,

1239
00:59:49,360 --> 00:59:53,760
Speaker 8: summer on. You guys are literally just like looking at

1240
00:59:53,880 --> 00:59:55,320
Speaker 8: suspicious things and.

1241
00:59:55,240 --> 00:59:58,920
Speaker 3: Gone, hmmm, well it doesn't really make sense. But like

1242
00:59:59,320 --> 01:00:04,360
Speaker 3: who am I true? Like what question? It? Question everything?

1243
01:00:05,200 --> 01:00:07,680
Speaker 3: So I started digging in, pulled up property records, and

1244
01:00:07,720 --> 01:00:10,440
Speaker 3: I find that we were named on the house, but

1245
01:00:10,520 --> 01:00:14,320
Speaker 3: we signed it over to her with quick claim deeds

1246
01:00:14,400 --> 01:00:19,200
Speaker 3: after my dad's passing. I was floored this whole time.

1247
01:00:19,240 --> 01:00:22,160
Speaker 3: I thought she did all this and we had no say,

1248
01:00:22,200 --> 01:00:26,680
Speaker 3: but somehow we signed it over. How Why then it

1249
01:00:26,720 --> 01:00:31,320
Speaker 3: all clicked and I remembered my grandma was having us

1250
01:00:31,320 --> 01:00:34,439
Speaker 3: sign papers after my dad's passing to close things out.

1251
01:00:35,160 --> 01:00:38,880
Speaker 3: One mentioned that house, and I got excited and said, sweet,

1252
01:00:38,920 --> 01:00:41,000
Speaker 3: I'm not going to sign this. Maybe we can fight

1253
01:00:41,080 --> 01:00:43,920
Speaker 3: her on the house when I have money for an attorney.

1254
01:00:44,200 --> 01:00:46,240
Speaker 3: My Grandma lost it on me and said, if you

1255
01:00:46,280 --> 01:00:49,000
Speaker 3: don't sign this, I'll go to jail for the taxes,

1256
01:00:49,000 --> 01:00:51,680
Speaker 3: they'll take my condo and I'll be homeless. Is that

1257
01:00:51,720 --> 01:00:55,320
Speaker 3: what you want? She also said, you have no claim

1258
01:00:55,360 --> 01:00:58,000
Speaker 3: to the house. It's hers. It's not for you. That

1259
01:00:58,080 --> 01:01:01,720
Speaker 3: paper's just so you won't contest the will later. So

1260
01:01:01,920 --> 01:01:05,120
Speaker 3: naturally we signed it, and all these years later, I

1261
01:01:05,240 --> 01:01:09,080
Speaker 3: finally realized why she was so cagy about us talking

1262
01:01:09,080 --> 01:01:11,960
Speaker 3: about it, and why she always talked nicely about my

1263
01:01:12,000 --> 01:01:16,160
Speaker 3: stepmom when she didn't. Right after his passing, she made

1264
01:01:16,200 --> 01:01:19,080
Speaker 3: a deal with my stepmom to keep her condo. My

1265
01:01:19,200 --> 01:01:21,480
Speaker 3: dad had bought it for her, so presumably it was

1266
01:01:21,520 --> 01:01:25,240
Speaker 3: partially in his name. Step keeps the house and Stepmom

1267
01:01:25,240 --> 01:01:28,919
Speaker 3: pays the remaining taxes. Once everything's been sold, Grandma gets

1268
01:01:28,960 --> 01:01:32,080
Speaker 3: me and my sister to sign the house over to Stepmom,

1269
01:01:32,520 --> 01:01:36,200
Speaker 3: and that's how it went down. Unbeknownst to us, and

1270
01:01:36,240 --> 01:01:37,920
Speaker 3: now she's trying to get us to sign over some

1271
01:01:38,000 --> 01:01:41,320
Speaker 3: property again while being dodgy about the details of why

1272
01:01:41,360 --> 01:01:44,120
Speaker 3: we need to sign. I looked at the document they

1273
01:01:44,200 --> 01:01:46,920
Speaker 3: wanted us to sign, and it's us selling it to

1274
01:01:47,000 --> 01:01:51,000
Speaker 3: my aunt for one dollar because my aunt needs money.

1275
01:01:52,160 --> 01:01:59,040
Speaker 3: No one dollar, No, and my dad knew that wasn't

1276
01:01:59,120 --> 01:02:02,360
Speaker 3: for him. I caught my sister up to speed once

1277
01:02:02,400 --> 01:02:04,720
Speaker 3: I realized she didn't know any of this and wasn't

1278
01:02:04,760 --> 01:02:08,080
Speaker 3: doing your own digging, and ultimately we decided not to sign,

1279
01:02:08,120 --> 01:02:10,760
Speaker 3: mainly because of how much they were pressuring us and

1280
01:02:10,800 --> 01:02:13,440
Speaker 3: putting us under the few pew to do it immediately,

1281
01:02:14,600 --> 01:02:17,400
Speaker 3: texting multiple times a day, calls I'm on my way

1282
01:02:17,400 --> 01:02:19,800
Speaker 3: to your house to pick up the sign paper, et cetera.

1283
01:02:20,480 --> 01:02:22,600
Speaker 3: And after we turn them down and I explained what

1284
01:02:22,680 --> 01:02:25,760
Speaker 3: I found, my grandma has not talked to me. I'm

1285
01:02:25,800 --> 01:02:28,880
Speaker 3: the only grandson who has gone and taken care of

1286
01:02:28,920 --> 01:02:30,960
Speaker 3: things for her, and I've made the effort to be

1287
01:02:31,000 --> 01:02:34,080
Speaker 3: a giver and not a taker for her, while my

1288
01:02:34,200 --> 01:02:38,120
Speaker 3: cousin's aunt and uncle are all drains. And yet now

1289
01:02:38,160 --> 01:02:40,480
Speaker 3: she won't talk to me because I didn't sign.

1290
01:02:40,240 --> 01:02:44,160
Speaker 8: This over hmmm, just that you need to be a

1291
01:02:44,160 --> 01:02:47,000
Speaker 8: little bit more curious about things that are strange.

1292
01:02:47,600 --> 01:02:50,000
Speaker 3: That's all. Need to read at read a little bit

1293
01:02:50,040 --> 01:02:55,000
Speaker 3: more when you get legal documents. And uh, definitely keep

1294
01:02:55,200 --> 01:02:59,880
Speaker 3: not talking to your grandma because she's shady. Yeah she sucks. Yeah,

1295
01:03:00,040 --> 01:03:02,880
Speaker 3: let's finish it up. On one hand, I'm doing well

1296
01:03:02,920 --> 01:03:05,439
Speaker 3: for myself. I don't need the money aunt and uncle

1297
01:03:05,560 --> 01:03:08,640
Speaker 3: do apparently. But on the other hand, when my dad passed,

1298
01:03:08,920 --> 01:03:12,080
Speaker 3: my sister and I were broke broke, and nobody offered

1299
01:03:12,120 --> 01:03:14,720
Speaker 3: to sell this then to help us out. It's always

1300
01:03:14,760 --> 01:03:18,000
Speaker 3: been them favored over us. But this made that crystal

1301
01:03:18,080 --> 01:03:20,680
Speaker 3: clear for me. It's not about the money, it's the

1302
01:03:20,720 --> 01:03:24,360
Speaker 3: principle of it. And now I'm conflicted. Am I overreacting

1303
01:03:24,400 --> 01:03:26,760
Speaker 3: and should I be reaching out? It's been five to

1304
01:03:26,800 --> 01:03:29,000
Speaker 3: six months now, and Thanksgiving made me think of it,

1305
01:03:29,040 --> 01:03:31,960
Speaker 3: as I didn't get any text, nor did I send

1306
01:03:32,040 --> 01:03:34,600
Speaker 3: one to be fair, and I normally go to her

1307
01:03:34,680 --> 01:03:37,920
Speaker 3: condo for it. Am I overreacting by not trying to

1308
01:03:37,920 --> 01:03:40,760
Speaker 3: rekindle because of this? I just don't know if I

1309
01:03:40,800 --> 01:03:46,000
Speaker 3: want to spend time with someone who did that. But also,

1310
01:03:46,160 --> 01:03:49,520
Speaker 3: she's all the family I have left. Dad's gone, Mom's gone,

1311
01:03:49,880 --> 01:03:55,680
Speaker 3: mom's side, grandma's gone, grandpa's gone, mom's side, aunt gone.

1312
01:03:55,800 --> 01:03:58,480
Speaker 3: They're all gone. So I know it's important not to

1313
01:03:58,560 --> 01:04:01,000
Speaker 3: let silly things get in the west. Not a silly thing.

1314
01:04:01,160 --> 01:04:03,480
Speaker 3: She stole your money. But I don't know if I

1315
01:04:03,520 --> 01:04:06,440
Speaker 3: can just get over this, if that's even all it takes.

1316
01:04:06,920 --> 01:04:09,080
Speaker 3: For all, I know, the only way to a relationship

1317
01:04:09,120 --> 01:04:13,120
Speaker 3: is to sign this property over. Yeah, don't, that's yours.

1318
01:04:13,160 --> 01:04:16,480
Speaker 3: Don't do that, that's yours, Opie, stop stop doing Yeah,

1319
01:04:16,480 --> 01:04:19,880
Speaker 3: she's like, well, to have a relationship with my evil grandma,

1320
01:04:20,000 --> 01:04:23,040
Speaker 3: I have to give her everything she wants at the cost. Yeah,

1321
01:04:23,080 --> 01:04:26,200
Speaker 3: at my own cost. Then maybe that's not a good

1322
01:04:26,240 --> 01:04:31,120
Speaker 3: relationship to have. Love shouldn't be conditional to like signing

1323
01:04:31,160 --> 01:04:32,440
Speaker 3: over your inheritance.

1324
01:04:33,120 --> 01:04:34,360
Speaker 6: And that's the end of this story.