00:00:08 Speaker 1: And I invited you here. I thought, I made myself perfectly clear. When you're a guest to my home, you gotta come to me empty. And I said, no, guests, you're presences. Presence and I already had too much stuff. 00:00:35 Speaker 2: So how do you dare to surbey me? 00:00:49 Speaker 3: Welcome to I said, no gifts? Temperature wine. 00:00:53 Speaker 2: Girl. 00:00:54 Speaker 3: We're here in the studio, as I guess, kind of usual at this point. If you're a current listener, it'll almost be Valentine's Day. So Romances in the Air. This is a passionate podcast. This is an erotic podcast. So you've come to the right place. What's new in my life? Last night and went and saw the movie Primate. What happens is, it's about a group of gals. They go to Hawaii for summer vacation, but then the pet chimp gets rabies from a mongoose and kills all of them. And I guess that kind of ruins the summer vacation. And this is all while the father's outsigning books. I mean, if me spoiling it doesn't ruin the movie for you. Go ahead and see it. Excellent work by whoever's in the chimp costume by the way I was. Really there were points when I thought it was really a chimp, because we've obviously moved on from actual chimps being in professional productions. They've got great chimp tech. You know, I've complained about Cgidar on the show, probably at least twice. They've got to get whoever did the chimp on this to do deer in other movies because it was excellent. That's essentially my life. Go to exactly rightstore dot com to get the T shirt. The T shirt's so beautiful, the new one's so gorgeous. So you've got to be in it. You've got to be impressing coworkers, attracting mates, do whatever you want. Happy Valentine's Day, let's get into it. I love today's guest. It's Gareth Reynolds. Gareth, welcome to I said no. 00:02:20 Speaker 2: Gifts, Thank you, Bridger, and am I your podcast Valentine? 00:02:24 Speaker 3: You are absolutely my podcast Valentine. 00:02:26 Speaker 2: Thank you be my Valentine. Hello Valentine. 00:02:30 Speaker 3: Are you a big Valentine's person? 00:02:31 Speaker 2: I'm a terrible all holiday right person. I just don't give a shit even my birthday, So I think that it's okay for me to broadly say I have no interest in any of it. 00:02:44 Speaker 3: Right, And that's how I've become. And I don't know if it's because I've just had so many holidays or if it's because of depression. 00:02:51 Speaker 2: It's you know, I think it's very interesting to watch as society completely collapses. How Like the Christmas Show. I always wonder that about Christmas because I used to love Christmas as a kid, and then and the magic and the all the things that go along. I used to listen to Christmas songs two three weeks leading up two weeks after I would find a great issue with January second, where I'd go, it's all over, I mean this, and we're not talking real holiday person into it. And then over the last five or six years, I just kind of keep going, what are we doing? What the hell is this? No? What what? Like when they talk about shopping time and how I just it's all just kind of a weird little thing. So so to answer your question, No, I just don't. I don't care about any of them. 00:03:41 Speaker 3: Yeah, I guess that's kind of true. I feel like time has become such a mush that like nothing ever feels like a season anymore to me. It all just feels like, Oh, I guess that we're just checking the box. 00:03:51 Speaker 2: I like that. It's a little time away from the you know, society. I like that break. But outside of that. 00:03:59 Speaker 3: Where we all everybody gets on board with suppressing their feedlongs. 00:04:03 Speaker 2: I would say my holiday drinking in the past three years is troubling. Now I do a dry January because I do a sopping December. Oh, the wine is just overflowing and alone alone holiday parties. Now stand up on the road has made me very good at at the. 00:04:22 Speaker 3: Drin drinking like a hotel room. Yes, wow, this is that's a positive atmosphere. 00:04:27 Speaker 2: Yes, yes, this is. This is a very good life I've carved up. 00:04:30 Speaker 3: You're getting drunk in a hotel room and watching TV What's going on South Park? 00:04:34 Speaker 2: And then I'm trying to dissuade myself from going back to the lobby for snacks. 00:04:39 Speaker 3: Oh you go to the lobby for snacks. 00:04:41 Speaker 2: Well, they I have the stoner mentality because I used to smoke so much pot that the lobby is. I'm very good if I don't have things in the house right. But on the road, they've created the ultimate pantry and it's an elevator right away. And then so you just go down there and you're like, just some peanuts and then you're like, I mean, butterfingers are very fun and silly and I deserve that. And then so I'll just be housing wine and being apologetic to the front desk worker, who I'm like, this is trip three, where I'm like three, I can't do four. 00:05:15 Speaker 3: I don't even understand, like these snacks are happening behind the counter at the like, this is something I would wouldn't even explore it a hotel because I'm just afraid of asking for anything. 00:05:24 Speaker 2: But but you know when you go into the lobby that they have the little like gift weird gift shop that like, well it's even more accessible. It's like there's they have a little hidden shanty zone where if you turn the corners bargain ben Willy Wonka and you go in there and they've they've you know, they're like do on gummy bears, some ice cream, by the way, sometimes more wine, which is not great. 00:05:49 Speaker 3: These are everything you've just described pairs so well with wine, butterfinger and wine. 00:05:54 Speaker 2: I'll tell you I'm my walking prilo set commercial. I genuinely am always. They're like black and white still with a little radiating red spot in the chest. 00:06:06 Speaker 3: Oh did you go somewhere for the holidays? 00:06:09 Speaker 2: What did you do? Now? I stayed here and I had gigs. I had a gig on New Year's so I was pretty much here the whole time. 00:06:17 Speaker 3: That's kind of nice. But it was raining the entire time. 00:06:19 Speaker 2: Yeah, I like that though. 00:06:20 Speaker 3: You like it when it's raining. Yeah, that's I'm getting used to that because it flooded my home so many years in a road that I like in a row. I have to kind of readjust to it because it's nice, it's cozy. 00:06:31 Speaker 2: Where are you from? 00:06:32 Speaker 3: Originally Salt Lake City? 00:06:34 Speaker 2: Oh okay? Where are you from? Wisconsin? Okay? So I crave the some season, something that feels like a season something weather. I'm out there trying to ice the rain a little bit, just to give me that like, oh, come on please. 00:06:46 Speaker 3: Right, And this year I went back home to Utah for the holidays. It was seventy degrees. It's good, right, It's perfect. Yeah, totally keeps you in that nice holiday spirit. It's that classic Christmas season weather. 00:06:59 Speaker 2: I hate that too. I hate when Christmas is seventy. 00:07:02 Speaker 3: Oh, it's a very this. I've never been in LA during Christmas, so I've always experienced winter weather because I'll go home to Utah where you usually see snow on the mountains. 00:07:13 Speaker 2: Yep, this year none of that. I did know you were from Saula like I did. That was a lapse. Utah I drive to all my shows. Oh I didn't know that. Yeah, And Utah I think is my favorite state to drive through, well because it's it is gorgeous, gorgeous, so beautiful that there's nowhere really like it. It's like Arizona's diet Utah, right, Utah is you feel small. 00:07:35 Speaker 3: You feel extremely small, and I love it. It's those mountains are just like when I grew up, taking them for granted obviously. Yeah, just like this is whatever. Then you move to LA and then you go back and it's like, this feels totally fhonny, this is cgi. 00:07:48 Speaker 2: LA might just be we come here to value what we left. I think might be part of it. 00:07:54 Speaker 3: Yeah, I think that's probably true. So you're going out, you're just driving four weeks at a time. 00:07:59 Speaker 2: Yeah, I probably about two to three weeks, and I do like a little tour, a run of shows for the most part. Every now and like New Year's I flew out, But but I bring I'm very to what I was pointing out before. I have these tendencies to go off the rails, so I can stay healthy if I bring enough home comforts, Like what, It's gonna get weird fast when I answer this question, Just so you know, I'll start. I'll start with the hits A hot plate, a hot plate, and a frying pan, and I'm cooking in the room. Feel like a detective. What But I'm solving my own issues, driving on what's wrong with what is the mystery? 00:08:41 Speaker 1: Well? 00:08:41 Speaker 2: Why am I like this? 00:08:43 Speaker 3: It's because you want to cook something in particularly healthy. 00:08:47 Speaker 2: I want to eat healthy and I and it saves money. But I you know, I tour with with people and they will be absolutely horrified by by what I have become. 00:08:59 Speaker 3: Well, this is something I take for granted. In La is like I'll go somewhere and realize, oh, LA has every sort of food I could possibly want, and then go somewhere else and You're like, there are two options, and both of them will kill me. I know, So I guess they'll can a hot play with you. Not a bad idea. 00:09:13 Speaker 2: I'm able to consistently know what I'll be having, and it does make me eat healthier because especially because if you go to a comedy club, what they're offering is, right, disco fries. 00:09:24 Speaker 3: It's upsetting, right buffalo wings. Yeah, so what are you cooking? 00:09:27 Speaker 2: I'll cook my breakfast, which is some eggs. Okay, I can put a little toast on there. 00:09:32 Speaker 3: So you're going to like where you get You're going to the grocery store and getting eggs in random town and putting it in the hotel fridge. 00:09:38 Speaker 2: Yes, yes, I have a fridge in my van. Oh it's a whole nightmare, that's what I'm saying. But then also like I'll have I have like a detergent and I mean again it's psychotic. But these are all the things that make me able to travel as much as I do. 00:09:54 Speaker 3: Right, And you're also just constantly prepared for a disaster. 00:09:58 Speaker 2: Yes, I'm a disaster pared for a disaster. Do you do you actually prep for disaster? 00:10:05 Speaker 3: Stuff? I need to get at least like something in my home. 00:10:09 Speaker 2: I do. What are you looking for? 00:10:10 Speaker 3: Well, currently, this is what I have. It's like twelve bottled waters beneath my bed. 00:10:15 Speaker 2: You're gonna be the You're not going to last as long as I think you'll want to. But part of me wonders, do you even want to? 00:10:23 Speaker 3: Right? I mean, this is a constant thing where I'm just like, let me die. 00:10:27 Speaker 2: It's kind of cope in a way for not having to do anything now. But right, but I would you know, I've always admired the Mormon preppers. 00:10:35 Speaker 3: Oh, I mean that's a that's part of Mormon culture. It's not even like part of more. 00:10:39 Speaker 2: That's very I I at some point I'll probably swing Mormon. I love Utah. I love their prepping. More wives, let's go. But I you know, they'll have places where they have preserves, games and jerkys and. 00:10:53 Speaker 3: We every Mormon has a basement and there's like at least one room dedicated to preparation. 00:10:58 Speaker 2: Did you grow up with that? 00:11:00 Speaker 3: Oh? Yeah, yes, I still have a room like that has various groceries and stuff, which is just kind of use. 00:11:05 Speaker 2: It's just like kind of your little warehouse. But so here's why you have a great situation. You are your drive to Utah is probably about twelve bottles of water away, so I have to use those to shower. I don't think that's the right. 00:11:18 Speaker 3: I really if I could just give you a little advice. Hold on, I know you like to be cleaned, but. 00:11:24 Speaker 2: I love to be screening. But I just you do that when you get there, do you know what I mean? Right? Yeah, you're you know, want to hydrate. 00:11:31 Speaker 3: Head back to my parents' house there, and then I just leach off of them through the rest of the earth. 00:11:36 Speaker 2: And by the way, I would love to be included in this. Like I said, I'm Mormon light, so I'm ready to I've. 00:11:42 Speaker 3: Got four seats in my car. I'll auction them off, let's you know, for like meat or something, whatever thing I need me. 00:11:49 Speaker 2: I'll be like I'm a hot plate and pan. I mean, I'm gonna be a valuable I'm gonna be very valuable in that ride. I've got a big thing of tougher that although my. 00:11:56 Speaker 3: Car is electric, so it's like we'll probably get I'll. 00:11:59 Speaker 2: Be honest, I don't think. I don't think we're gonna make it. 00:12:01 Speaker 3: No, I'm absolutely not prepared. I'm not the sort of person that survives. 00:12:05 Speaker 2: Yeah, I I I I think about it, but I am not as prepared. 00:12:11 Speaker 3: I mean, it's so interesting I mean, I actually, we're not getting into this because I'm going to get really real about it. And I don't want to think I'm pushing away these thoughts. 00:12:20 Speaker 2: I push the Valentine's episode. So we should probably talk about each other. How is dry January going for you? Well, first of all, I do get a cheat day. I've made a contract with myself. But it's good. It is a great reason. 00:12:37 Speaker 3: Right. Do you feel fully different when you're not drinking? Yes, this is the thing I get from everyone who does a dry something. 00:12:44 Speaker 2: Yes. 00:12:45 Speaker 3: Well, and then and they seem to hate being out of it. I think being out of the draft or out of dry January like it seems like like this sounds so good, the other eleven months of the year must be a fascinating experience. 00:12:59 Speaker 2: It's I think, I think it is that you it's about maybe three months. My brother said, once he's quit drinking for six months, he was fully done. 00:13:09 Speaker 3: Oh wow. 00:13:09 Speaker 2: So I think if you make the three months, you really start to think I'm not gonna do this, right, But the month is it is It is a full reminder of what are we doing? Why do we do this? It is a poison. And then you get out of it, and you go, I do a little bit, and then by April you're like, hey, I do dry jenuey, I can do whatever I want. 00:13:28 Speaker 3: Your face down on a hotel room. 00:13:30 Speaker 2: Yeah, you're you're like apologizing to some woman named Candace for your fifth butterfinger. You know, but uh, it is great. The sleep is great. 00:13:38 Speaker 3: Okay, that's what I always hear. 00:13:39 Speaker 2: The sleep is great. The sleep is great. Is it because you just wake up more refreshed? Well, yeah, I think you You don't sleep great. Alcohol effects your sleep pretty pretty detrimentally. 00:13:49 Speaker 3: It puts you to sleep, but doesn't really. 00:13:51 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's not a good sleep. So you I got this this the aura ring thing. 00:13:56 Speaker 3: Oh, that's an aura ring. 00:13:57 Speaker 2: And what it really is is it's just like an ass whole who every morning you wake up because that was bad? Or Andrey Jay is aust What are you doing different? I'm like nothing. 00:14:08 Speaker 3: I feel like the shaming can't possibly help, doesn't help. No, it's just driving you further into whatever you're doing. It depresses me, which leads into the bottles. 00:14:15 Speaker 2: I go right back to the bottle. 00:14:17 Speaker 3: This feels like basic human psychology to me, that this company is overlooking I think. 00:14:21 Speaker 2: But I need it. 00:14:22 Speaker 3: There's some of us are so incapable at adulting that we we you've got to have a device. 00:14:27 Speaker 2: I like that. It's like, hey, there's one hundred calories back there. How does it track calories? I honestly, it's probably all bullshit. It's probably all bullshit, but I have something to do with your heart rate, your your biometric ish data. 00:14:44 Speaker 3: Do you ever find yourself like slipping it off and going into a like a bakery or something. 00:14:49 Speaker 2: Well it's not a camera, so but it doesn't it'll burn calories. It tells I can't tell how much you've Oh, it tells you how many you're burning. 00:14:59 Speaker 3: Yeah, that's why I was like, how could it possibly know what's going into that? I would love like hooks into your blood strap. It is, there's a little pin who goes through it through my finger. This has gone too far. 00:15:12 Speaker 2: It shocks me when I'm bad. No Jesus, Oh yeah, you. 00:15:14 Speaker 3: Don't want to track how many calories you're burning because it's literally impossible. 00:15:18 Speaker 2: I agree, you could. 00:15:18 Speaker 3: You could run like fifty miles and it's like seventy five calories. 00:15:23 Speaker 2: It's and it's honestly, it is disappointing. There's lots of times where I'll go the only thing that likes is yard work. Yard work. It's like it's five thousand calories. I'm like, I don't I don't think it we're doing in the yard. I'm literally just like mowing it or strimming and it's and it's just going, man, you're a beast. Wow. But then I'll go for a run and it'll be like. 00:15:41 Speaker 3: A right fascinating. 00:15:42 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's weird. 00:15:43 Speaker 3: I guess if it was a manual lawnmower, that's real. 00:15:46 Speaker 2: Hell yeah it's not. 00:15:47 Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm sure it's rocking automatic electure. 00:15:49 Speaker 2: Oh electric. 00:15:50 Speaker 3: I haven't moved the lawn since my parents, and that was a gas one, of course. 00:15:53 Speaker 2: Yeah, those are the miss mowing the lawn. Well, you had the rider, No, I wish I had had. My dad had the rider when I was growing. 00:16:01 Speaker 3: My dad has one now of course. Yeah, now that you had three sons that could push a lawnmower, that's a motor. That's why you have children. 00:16:08 Speaker 2: That's why you have kids. That's what you know. 00:16:10 Speaker 3: I actually loved pushing it. If there's something very satisfying about the entire experience. 00:16:13 Speaker 2: Yeah, I agree. I I feel like I've done way more than my God the or ring affirms. 00:16:19 Speaker 3: That, of course, like you're a beast out there stay behind the lawn miller. 00:16:22 Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, but I uh no, I do too. I really enjoy getting that project done. 00:16:27 Speaker 3: So you're mowing the lawn. And what was the other thing you said you're doing in. 00:16:29 Speaker 2: This strimming swede eating? Oh? Interesting one called weed whacking. 00:16:35 Speaker 3: We'd whacking. I don't like a weed whacker to death. Really, It's like I'm gonna take a toe off or something. 00:16:42 Speaker 2: There's a thing there. I don't know. 00:16:43 Speaker 3: It feels like a dangerous that doesn't It feels like those need to be in more horror movies. 00:16:47 Speaker 2: I agree, And I also I don't know why we're doing it. It's right, I'm whacking. It's like a nice little grass wall. 00:16:54 Speaker 1: Right. 00:16:54 Speaker 3: I feel like if we could just embrace weeds as a nice looking plant. It was everyone's prop. 00:16:59 Speaker 2: It was my twenties and thirties loved it. Now you've never smoked weed? Oh yeah, you love weed. I don't love weed. You've done? 00:17:06 Speaker 3: Yeah, Like I would prefer to get high, uh to drinking? 00:17:09 Speaker 2: For sure? What is do you and bibe? What is your no? 00:17:13 Speaker 3: Not that often. No, it's just not I like to feel it's probably a control issue. Yeah, truly, it's a thing where I feel the need to be in control all the time. 00:17:23 Speaker 2: I think that is as smart. That's yeah, look at my life, what is it, what is it benefiting? We're all losers. We are all massive loser. That's kind of the thing. 00:17:34 Speaker 3: It kind of just doesn't matter about you do at all. 00:17:37 Speaker 2: There's always something I like I said, when I was a fat pig man and I kind of cleaned up my stuff that I would then I would go, well, you ate like three apples last night. You know, there's always three apples and nagging. Yeah, I'd be like, you're a monster. Like when I was really good on my I just did my special and I like got in very good shape for that, and then the wheels completely came off. But when I was leading up to that, you know, I'd eat like a hundred calorie popcorn and I'd go, you just you're out of control, you are out of your mind. You are such a bad boy. 00:18:10 Speaker 3: Have you lost a lot of weight? 00:18:12 Speaker 2: I see pictures or things of myself from uh maybe five years ago, and I was a lot fatter. Interesting, like I'm still not great. I would say you're in great shape. Well, I sometimes I'm in great shape, and sometimes I'm like it's eluding me. But when I look back five years ago or five to ten years ago, I really go, wow, Craig could because I was walking around going I'm in great shape, right, And I was very resistance. 00:18:43 Speaker 3: Yes, well, you probably looked great. 00:18:45 Speaker 2: I did not. There is no part of me that looked great. I'm gonna bring up some pictures I could gladly do that. I'm sure you were fine. I wasn't all relative. No, I was fat. So I appreciate you're very nice, but I was disgusting you wanted to change. You wanted to change. I really enjoyed the partying. 00:19:04 Speaker 3: And that, and it was all coming from drinking, mostly drinking, and calories were mostly in and weed. Okay, I was really snacking. 00:19:12 Speaker 2: Yeah, I think I had no concept of how many calories were in things. 00:19:16 Speaker 3: Right. It's hard to tell. 00:19:17 Speaker 2: It really shouldn't be, but for me it was impossible being nice. It's not you, yeah, I mean it's like the well they the serving size. That's some lawyer bullshit. Back of package. It's simply there on the package. Yes, yes, but the serving I will push back. The serving size is quite a They should it literally should just not. 00:19:38 Speaker 3: I guess it shouldn't have a serving size. Now you should just say this is how much is in the bag, because we know you're going to eat the entire thing. 00:19:44 Speaker 2: The plan is for all of it. I'll do the math if I want it. But instead they go these nutterer butters fifty calories and you go, that's awesome, and then they go I went through a big nutter butterface. I'm not surprised. 00:19:56 Speaker 3: I ate there was a period when I was, I mean, how csing nutter butter. 00:20:01 Speaker 2: That's see, they're out of control. You did not enjoy that. 00:20:04 Speaker 3: They are a delicious Oh they're fantastic. 00:20:06 Speaker 2: They are. 00:20:07 Speaker 3: But then I found a better alternative called the peanut butter gaucho. 00:20:11 Speaker 2: Of the gaucho, well it's off. 00:20:13 Speaker 3: The market now, removed it from the market. Unfortunately, I was the only consumer of the peanut butter goucher. What was like a more It was a heartier nutter butter. It was like a butter simply not healthier, No, but it tasted a little less sweet, and it's more like peanut butter. And so that makes it actually easier to eat, because like a sweet thing, eventually you're like, oh, I'm feeling sick, but a less sweet thing. I'm through the whole bang. 00:20:37 Speaker 2: We and you you could comfortably house that because you are. You're a very felt Oh thank you. 00:20:43 Speaker 3: I We'll see when this all ends. I feel like I have been blessed with some sort of DNA that allows me to but. 00:20:50 Speaker 2: It's not because you have a focus on I. 00:20:54 Speaker 3: I've like I think I've kind of managed both. There was a huge period when I was eating I was eating not at least nine cookies a night, depending on somes. And now I'm eating one cookie a night. 00:21:04 Speaker 2: And I love that for you, Thank you. I love it for me as well, one cookie night dy. 00:21:10 Speaker 3: But I do feel like my family is able to eat a lot of food without gaining a ton of weight. What point am I trying to make here? 00:21:19 Speaker 2: Well that you you? I mean that nutter butters were gauchos. 00:21:25 Speaker 3: Was there another peanut butter flavored cookie? I think those are the two big ones. 00:21:28 Speaker 2: So you remember nutty bars. 00:21:30 Speaker 3: I'm not a nutty bar person. 00:21:32 Speaker 2: The texture. I haven't had one in a while, but I remember them. Being fantastic. I don't like a wafer. Oh I'm a wafer guy, so you have to. 00:21:40 Speaker 3: I think it's a there are two different people in the world, a wafer or no wafer, And I don't like a way for that soft push on your teeth kind of sends a chill down my spot. 00:21:49 Speaker 1: Yeah. 00:21:50 Speaker 2: Yet, see, I think this is the issue. I'm not a I'm I'm a I'm gonna bring me. You're tired, you're poor, year hungry, whatever it is, eat out of it. Yeah, peanut butter for me, I can't have that in the house. Oh yeah, I'm like a dog. It is exactly if any if I was ever loved by anyone, it would end once they saw me with peanut butter. 00:22:09 Speaker 3: Right. 00:22:10 Speaker 2: What about the powder, the peebee powder? Yeah, all that to me honestly more dangerous because it it takes up less like you get more bang for your bite. Right, And it is magic peanut butter that you can just mix with water and create whenever. And you think of it as since it's not as readily accessible, but no, it is way healthier. 00:22:33 Speaker 1: It is. 00:22:34 Speaker 2: But I mean again, I mean healthy, I don't know what healthy is. Again, if you eat, if you apothet carry all the powder to life in one evening. It's not good for you. And I'm capable of moves like that. 00:22:46 Speaker 3: So your home is it just the cupboards are bare for the most part. That's kind of how my house is, to be honest, I don't cook at a home at all. So I just have the like cookie dough in the fridge in a few healthy stents. 00:22:55 Speaker 2: See, if I had cookie dough in the fridge, that would be gone right. 00:22:59 Speaker 3: See, but there's that step. If you cook, want bake one, then shut the oven down. Now there's a whole process that you have to get going before more get back. 00:23:09 Speaker 2: I'm not going to insult your intelligence, but you obviously know that you don't need to cook COOKI dough. 00:23:16 Speaker 3: But there's no fear of food poisoning. No, nothing will stop you. 00:23:22 Speaker 2: I want it. It'll slow me down, just like I'm like Godzilla. Just the bullets bounce off me if I'm in the zone. 00:23:30 Speaker 3: It. 00:23:31 Speaker 2: So my mother was in uh she was had some surgery out here, and my brother and I, so we were at the hospital. I don't remember the exact logistics of this, but my brother and I were at the hospital and then my brother. This is two three years ago. Uh, and this is December when the you know, the wheels come off right, And he had a bag of rollos like a family. Hey, here's rollos for the month. And he stayed the night at my place and uh and left the next morning and forgot the rollos. 00:24:06 Speaker 3: Oh no. 00:24:06 Speaker 2: And so then two nights later we go to the hospital for my mother and sort of as similar. He's like, well, come over, and he mentions the rollos and I thought, well, he doesn't know Daddy's little secret that those are all gone because I spiraled two nights ago or over the past two nights. And then he got to my place and he it's it's been a joke since. 00:24:26 Speaker 3: Well and roller that's impressive because rollers are a thing you really have to work through. It's a real chewy thing. 00:24:31 Speaker 2: And as well as independently the. 00:24:34 Speaker 3: Soil a series of steps and stopped me. Didn't stop me if I had a bottle of wine. 00:24:39 Speaker 2: Nothing. Nothing. 00:24:41 Speaker 3: I think rollos are disgusting, by the way. Interesting so my girlfriend I think they were like there are two ingredients that I love and they're not doing it. Well. Oh see, she my girlfriend has the story about she she loved the caramel, so she put a bunch of rollers in a colander and watered the chocolate off to it. 00:24:56 Speaker 2: And I was like, you know they can buy caramel. What do you had? It's not a precious restorry. Honestly, it's like she didn't know that there was just caramel available. 00:25:08 Speaker 3: It's like cooking down heroin or something. 00:25:10 Speaker 2: It's so crazy, like PB, that's like that to me, very similar to Heroin. 00:25:15 Speaker 3: Well, look, we have to talk about something else. There's something else that I've been dancing around here. Okay, Gareth, I was excited to have you here on the podcast. Thank you a thou Garris, come by. 00:25:24 Speaker 2: We'll have a nice time. We'll move on with our days. 00:25:27 Speaker 3: Gareth has a podcast. He knows what he's doing. 00:25:30 Speaker 2: Sure, I have eighteen podcasts. Go ahead. 00:25:33 Speaker 3: This podcast is called I said no Gifts, So I was a little startled. I'll say it was a jump scare when you walked in holding two gorgeously wrapped gifts. 00:25:43 Speaker 2: So you want to get to the premise. Yeah, there's not an intervention. You're shifting gears for this in the family. Oh my god, my stalker, Gareth. We haven't been recording. Oh my God, that would be how sad. That's that's a horror film. Someone who pretends they have a podcast that's so scared. Oh, that's really episodes. 00:26:04 Speaker 3: That those stand ups who do sets in their basement and then put mute or put an audience laughter. That's a scary. 00:26:10 Speaker 2: Well, I mean, we all start somewhere and I can't defend it, but I did it. It was the eighties, it was wild. 00:26:17 Speaker 3: Well should we open these gifts here on the podcast? Well? 00:26:19 Speaker 2: Yes, allow me to contextualize, because you you flagged a couple things, first that there's two and second that the wrapping is perfect. Shit. So I thought I was doing this show. Probably a month ago, I had a miscommunication with Kevin Bartel, who's the producer of next we have my one of my eighteenth one that you've been on the people should go listen to, and and so I had them wrapped in preparation and it was literally I said. I texted Kevin that morning and I said, hey, what, uh, you know, what's the address? And then Kevin goes, oh, you know whatever, You're going to do it another time today. So I wrapped two thinking that on the way I would make a decision. Sure, this feels very honestly, I forgot what they were. So the joy of these gifts is that I don't know what I've given you. Now one of them, as you can see, the wrapping has started to fall by, said one of them. I do now know, right, you must have caught a glimpse of I caught a glimpse right. The other I know what it is, but I don't know specifically what it was. 00:27:28 Speaker 3: And one of them will kill me. 00:27:30 Speaker 2: One of them is a snake. One of them is a venomous python. 00:27:34 Speaker 3: Should I just open the top? One? 00:27:35 Speaker 2: For sure? 00:27:38 Speaker 3: As I said, it's gorgeously wrap Thank you holiday Holiday rap okay brand, Yes, this is completely it's a bag of Smarties smart Mix. Yeah, what are we talking about when. 00:27:50 Speaker 2: We say smart Mix? Oh? I think you're getting all. 00:27:53 Speaker 3: The Oh they've evolved Smarties, thank god. Yes, it's about time. This brand was around for four hundred years. Yes, and they finally said let's put some new flavors. 00:28:03 Speaker 2: Now, I'll tell you how I ended up with them, which is talk like that. I was on one of my other Ateen podcasts called We're Here to Help with Jake Johnson and Jimmy Kimmel was our gud oh I love and I don't remember what I said, but I think Jimmy and I were shitting all over Smarties. 00:28:20 Speaker 3: You know. 00:28:20 Speaker 2: It was like basically just a step above Tombs or something like that. And Smarti's reached out to me on Instagram. Oh of course said and said, hey, you've soured our name publicly. We'd love this. We'd love to undo that and send you some Smarties. And they sent me a huge box of Smarties. 00:28:39 Speaker 3: And yeah, this is the thing that feels bad. 00:28:42 Speaker 2: As someone who said I can't have snacks in the house, the Smarties have made it. 00:28:47 Speaker 3: This feels like a bad move on Smarti's part, especially now, I feel like it's more of a thing if like you send a Smarties T shirt so the person doesn't try the product again and say, well, I still don't like it. 00:28:57 Speaker 2: You know, they make a little lollipop oh and that's actually good. Those are gone. 00:29:03 Speaker 3: But it's like the texture of a Smartie. 00:29:04 Speaker 2: Yes, but somehow it works more for me. Sour. It multiple a multitude of flavors, but I would love to get feedback as a one cookie night, I could see you. 00:29:14 Speaker 3: I'm gonna try these sour ones, right I like a sour candy. Okay, interesting, I don't. 00:29:19 Speaker 2: Oh you don't. I've almost loved sour candy. What is that about? That's like people are like really hot things. 00:29:25 Speaker 3: Yeah. I think it's like you've burned off all of your nerves and you're looking for something to feel. 00:29:31 Speaker 2: Okay, here's original. That's by the way. I don't think we could just move on from that real simply Bridger right, that is a very dark stent. 00:29:40 Speaker 3: You know. 00:29:40 Speaker 2: I know I'm dead inside. So Smarties, there's I like decade, I haven't been in love in ten years, so I do sour patch kids. 00:29:47 Speaker 3: I can barely get out of bed in the morning. 00:29:49 Speaker 2: Okay, so what are these? 00:29:50 Speaker 3: Okay, there's I'm I'm gonna try the extreme sour right because I know the original suck and they should just cancel those again. 00:29:57 Speaker 2: I want to thank Smarties for the care package, and I apologize for Bridges doing does not speak. I don't even think he speaks for his show. I think he just speaks personally. This is not the I said no gifts policy on smart Smarty. It's just to be clear. 00:30:08 Speaker 3: I haven't received my box yet. 00:30:10 Speaker 2: Yes, that's the move. 00:30:11 Speaker 3: Yes, and I'm really looking forward to having tons of and they sugar. 00:30:14 Speaker 2: They load you up. They're not fucking around. All right, let me get in here. Do you want any of these? No, thank you, I came having had as they say, Troy and. 00:30:26 Speaker 3: Okay, I mean, first of all, textually it's tough. Yeah, smarty is not. It's very drug store candy. 00:30:35 Speaker 2: It's kind of it's it's just kind of the page one note, which is. 00:30:41 Speaker 3: This is the texture of ad hanging in there with this exactly you're pilly, Okay, I will say, okay, wow, hard to swallow. 00:30:51 Speaker 2: And and the not not from the no. See for those who are are not seeing this, you're you are having sour face, yeah, which I think you would enjoy. Yeah, but you seem to be chemically the fate. 00:31:06 Speaker 3: The sour face is coming from the turning into powder like I'm eating bone. Ok So it's merrily yes, Okay, Okay, I would say it's rich and marrow. No, I think that the flavor is actually good. 00:31:22 Speaker 2: Okay. So like if I think they should just Top Chef keep going. 00:31:26 Speaker 3: They should cancel regular flavor. Okay, literally, no one wants you. 00:31:29 Speaker 2: Want them canceled. You want them to dig up some all stuff that's Smartie's regular. 00:31:33 Speaker 3: Dead find the misogynistic of tweets they were about, like, I mean, look, you wore that. 00:31:42 Speaker 2: They should. 00:31:43 Speaker 3: I don't know why they keep trying with the original show me one person in the world after ninety nine years old. 00:31:50 Speaker 2: It's like the Lays original, Who is that for? 00:31:53 Speaker 3: That's me? See that a salty chip? Stop a salty chip. 00:31:58 Speaker 2: Oh, you're gonna find yoursel out number. No, there's a plethora. I just been looking for free Lays. There's a plethora of flavors where they've gone in directions that are far superior. I love a salt salt and grease's, yes, but they offer that in a multitude of flavor, Like what flavor are you going for? We okay, here, I'm going to say something and you're gonna get upset, and I'm gonna say it anyway. Salt and vinegar. 00:32:24 Speaker 3: Oh, I love a saltank. I'm not opposed to the rest. No, but I think that you just need to have that original to go back to. 00:32:32 Speaker 2: If I have original and another and I hate sour cream and onion, I'll probably go there over there. 00:32:39 Speaker 3: Yeah, you know, I love a sour cream and onion. But most of these things that don't really pair well with another food. If you're having it with a sandwich or something. I just want salt on a chip. It's like a French fry. 00:32:49 Speaker 2: So yeah, I well, you've made a pretty good case there. I'm not gonna lie to you, but that's what I would say, side dish lays, right, okay, As a pull from you know, the gas station, what are we doing? 00:33:03 Speaker 3: Yeah, you need to have something along with that. 00:33:05 Speaker 2: Here's something they've never said at a chevron, we're out of LA's original. That's never happened. No, absolutely not. We're running low on the original ones. 00:33:16 Speaker 3: I would say, even at a gas station, I don't even go for a potato chip. I needed like a dorrito or something. I need something that's fully like an experience. 00:33:24 Speaker 2: Now, why do you not consider that a potato chip. 00:33:26 Speaker 3: Dorito was a corn chip? 00:33:27 Speaker 2: Oh, you're right, break it, you're right. Give one. You're very good, egg all over your face. You're very good, by the way. I love eggs. No, you're you're absolutely right, and I agree. I Now, have you had dots? Pretzels? Dots? 00:33:40 Speaker 3: No, what's this? 00:33:41 Speaker 2: I'm gonna quickly give you the timeline of Dots pretzels. I found dots pretzels, became obsessed with dots pretzels. They're the best pretzels ever. Are they a stick or like the and they have now tons of flavors, which is you know what happens? But she Dot uh, you know, she had this lovely little I'm just a lady who's making pretze. She was like a doctor Brauner type. Yes, completely, and so you're going, oh, I support this one. Well, she sold her company to Hershey's and now they are acting like, you know, dots is gold, that the price of a bag of dots is astounding. Is the quality the same? I think it's a little tweaked, But you're not gonna be You're not gonna walk away from the dot conversation because of the flavor or quality. It's the fact that somehow this person has allowed this big company to be charging eight nine dollars ten dollars a bag that can't possibly be turned. 00:34:42 Speaker 3: It's true, that's crazy. 00:34:44 Speaker 2: And you got rolled gold sitting over there. 00:34:47 Speaker 3: Nine. Yeah, they're terrible, but price wise, I just I will not can't justify that. 00:34:54 Speaker 2: No, I'm furious that the dots line. No, that's then like a wedding gift. Yes, that is. And by the way, I've given it a wedding and they're not even happy. So nobody's there like, this is not a gift. I'm going this is. That was twenty dollars a pretzel. 00:35:06 Speaker 3: Why are the dots one so good? 00:35:08 Speaker 2: She just did it right, I don't know. 00:35:10 Speaker 3: Wow, it's just a good flavor. 00:35:13 Speaker 2: Whatever she did, she did it, she did it right. Dott no dot dot. For a second, I was like, are we talking about the government, the Department of tts, which is what Smarty's got canceled for that tweet? But but no, she's she's just. 00:35:30 Speaker 3: Lost the plot right, Well, I mean she sold out, sold out Tale's old as time, betrayed her dream. Yes, she created a beautiful product and she could have had just enough money, Yes, but then she needed a third home. 00:35:42 Speaker 2: What is with us? 00:35:43 Speaker 3: This lady sucks? 00:35:44 Speaker 2: I agree, I'm furious at her. 00:35:46 Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean, what a betrayal. 00:35:48 Speaker 2: I agree. How much money is enough? 00:35:50 Speaker 3: That really is a question for me a lot recently. I completely agree, and the same I just like what science needs to get down to what is enough money? 00:35:59 Speaker 2: It's it's it's really weird, especially because you know, we've in the last twenty years, we've let it get so out of control that it it's I don't know if we thought that these sick tech bros were going to cut themselves off, right, but whatever it is, they took it all. They're sick, yes, And now we're all standing here going like, hey, assholes. Most of us are just chilling, like we just want to not right, just enough, and we're only am I working for it. Just give us the time to just you know, relax a little bit after night cookie. 00:36:37 Speaker 3: Yeah, not being a full panic all the time. Yeah, No, I don't understand. I mean the thing for me is like, once you're two, a billion or whatever, it's like, what do you buy it? What could you possibly need? 00:36:46 Speaker 2: It's a chemical problem. 00:36:47 Speaker 3: Right, it becomes like a mental illness. I think it's like, uh, I hate to bring it back to Primate with the rabies, but I think something goes wrong in your brain, the wiring blows up, and suddenly you're just like the number will never be enough. 00:37:00 Speaker 2: But what do they all have in common? For the most part, because I actually in my special have a very large chunk dedicated to how billionaires should not exist they're losers. They were losers. Yeah, they're truly, they grew up total losers. 00:37:15 Speaker 3: Yeah that's really I mean, Mark Zuckerberg couldn't be a bigger loser. 00:37:18 Speaker 2: Mark Zuckerberg was such a loser that he took he created a social media empire and still everyone's like, yeah, you're like a dipshit right. 00:37:28 Speaker 3: Well, and the empire started on a thing trying to make friends that he stole. 00:37:32 Speaker 2: He couldn't from his only friends, the only two people who let him in on the inner circles. So what a feeling, yeah, I mean, and then he buys like an island in Hawaii to prepare for when everyone wants to kill him, and it's like, or just give ninety eight percent of it back. 00:37:50 Speaker 3: There's such an easy solution to all of us. It's the same thing with Elon. All he wants to do is be funny, and it's just like, well, it simply can't be it. 00:37:57 Speaker 2: Really, he is like a Greek myth. 00:37:59 Speaker 3: Yeah, you know, it's a lesson that will eventually be learned humor us Like he he really it's all, especially when you know Comedy's back all. 00:38:09 Speaker 2: That stuff, and it was like yeah, but it's still doesn't mean you're funny, dude, And it's the thing people like us can do. And and yet it's all he wants and he can all the money, he can't buy it. Did you see over the weekend he had a joke. No, he was Davos, which you don't even get me started, but he it was. I think his joke was peace. It was like, I don't even know what the acronym stands for, but he was up there, like, I think it's because everyone wants a piece. I mean bombing at Davos. That is a warm room, able to kill. 00:38:45 Speaker 3: You should be murdering it absolutely with a popsicle stick shokes seriously, and it's. 00:38:50 Speaker 2: Like all the rich, they're paid, they're incentivized to be there, and he is bombing. 00:38:55 Speaker 3: Oh that episode of SNL is should be sent into space. It's such a fascinating thing to look at. 00:39:02 Speaker 2: It was a real hinge moment of look we allowed Steven sagaal Wayne Gretzky, Michael Phelps, You've. 00:39:11 Speaker 3: Gone too You've gone too far. 00:39:12 Speaker 2: This is not okay, this is wrong. 00:39:14 Speaker 3: I need to go back and watch that. It's really just mind blowing. 00:39:18 Speaker 2: It's art. But we have not had the distance to look back and analyze it just yet. And again I'm not saying that. You know, look the dots, lady Dot, she's not a billionaire. She might be. 00:39:31 Speaker 3: Well maybe we don't know what that deal was with her she's but what are we what are we doing? I truly don't know. I mean my theory is I remember as a kid of cheating and video games, you would put in a cheat code and get into the dice or whatever. I'm sure, and then the game immediately becomes boring. Yes, And I think that's what happens once you have that much money. You're like, well, life is boring. Now, maybe if I get more money, it will be it'll stop being boring. 00:39:55 Speaker 2: Well, they've even out acquired that sensation because now it's Mars or they need to go in Greenland for their minerally, like the only thing they agree on is just the next crazy step where they're like, we need to put chips in our head corn not potato and uh and and we need to go to other planets and we need to colonize these places. And it's just like we left them alone for too long. 00:40:18 Speaker 3: Wait too long? Well, an elon, it's also a drug. Thing, right, Yeah, what drug is he doing? 00:40:23 Speaker 2: There's a lot. 00:40:24 Speaker 3: He totally melted his brain, yes. 00:40:26 Speaker 2: But there are drugs that he That's why I hate when I find out that these people take mushrooms or shit like, because I'm like, no, you're you're doing You're not taking the same as the rest of us. Right, You're no longer with us when you take mushrooms. It's you want to touch plants and hug trees and walk barefoot in the garden that hasn't been strimmed, all these things. You certainly the last thing you are thinking about is how do I acquire everything to make everyone my slave or servant or serf. It's crazy? 00:40:58 Speaker 3: How do I make the algorith the more efficient? Yes? 00:41:01 Speaker 2: While doing much? Yes? Yes? Yeah? And I mean so so I don't know. So she dots, she's on the shade. I hope she it was worth it. It probably in the nightmarish scenario that we've set up for all of ourselves, it was. 00:41:16 Speaker 3: And they probably you know, it's probably a non compete clause. She probably can't create dots too, No, no more dots. So she's got like change her identity, burn off her fingerprints, start creating more dots. 00:41:29 Speaker 2: Oh, that would be hilarious. Hi, I'm Todd Dot. We figured out that that's just that backward. It's me Todd. I also make pretzels, but I do the classic version. 00:41:42 Speaker 3: She's going to get bored. I you would hope she's going to get bored and she's going to start killing. 00:41:48 Speaker 2: I think that they're so. My old booking agent retired in early sixties and maybe late fifties, and he literally did the math where he said, I wanted to figure out how much I needed to live the rest of my life happy, okay, and what wasn't Well I don't know the exact figure, but but he he did the plan away and he looks phenomenal and his life is exceptional. 00:42:12 Speaker 3: I'm sure it is. 00:42:13 Speaker 2: And he's not looking to be a you know, a billionaire, one hundred millionaire, any of that. Ship. 00:42:18 Speaker 3: He knows what he wanted and needed and now has did the map. 00:42:22 Speaker 2: Right, That's that's all we should be going. 00:42:24 Speaker 3: I feel like that's kind of the only answer you can get about life is what I actually want to need. If you can get to that. 00:42:29 Speaker 2: Yeah, Well, and they better watch out because they are the case for socialism or communist They keep whether people recognize it or not, they are out there making the case every day. My god, I just love what people who are getting crushed under capitalism are going like, I mean, yeah, but this is the best version of a system. And you're like, what how what are you talking about? Look at the fact, you fool number. 00:42:57 Speaker 3: Yeah, and those are usually the people whose lives are an Ebbs disaster. Yeah, there's there is this usually sad man, but it's Stockholm. Mean, yeah, it really, I mean you think of that is and it's a little like I'm different. I will be the person who'll be oh. 00:43:09 Speaker 2: Yeah, we're all yeah. It's like being behind someone buying scratch off. Right, it's just a matter of time where you're just going, sir, please this sir, it's not it ain't. 00:43:19 Speaker 3: It ain't the tickets there should I try a tropical flavor here, God, I'm not gonna like that. I think tropical flavor is revolted. Sure, and look they're they're padding the bag with the original flavor. 00:43:32 Speaker 2: Of course, adding the bag. 00:43:34 Speaker 3: They know what they're doing. Original this is try a tropical. I'm trying to get the tropic. Okay, got a tropical right, there you go. I have you ever had a good experience with the tropical punch? 00:43:44 Speaker 2: Do you do you vacation? Have you ever been to a tropical I was just in Hawaii and it was lovely? Well, well, well, look who doesn't hate tropical stuff all of a sudden, as long as it's not in my mouth? Well, listen, I've said that on an island before. 00:43:58 Speaker 3: Oh and immediately I think this was banana. 00:44:02 Speaker 4: Oh, the worst of them all, Oh, Bridger, Oh, this is this is a This is a gift from the heart that I forgot I brought you until about ten minutes before I came in here. 00:44:14 Speaker 3: This is somehow worse than regular smart Well, I need a regular Oh my god. 00:44:18 Speaker 2: The ungrateful nature of this is. 00:44:20 Speaker 3: The move for Smarties. If Smarties is listening, take normal off the market, Take extreme sour off the market, release tropical for about eight to twelve months. 00:44:31 Speaker 2: By the way you backlash, you are the surviving. 00:44:35 Speaker 3: The plan you've just pitched for them is yeah, you've gotta save up a little bit of money for a rainy time. 00:44:40 Speaker 2: It looks Smarties, this is this is like changing your golf swing. In a year. You'll thank me. 00:44:45 Speaker 3: You've got to be able to the weather a bit of a storm, but an eight to twelve, the backlash will be so unbelievable. People will Yeah, people will be begging for regular smartiest. 00:44:58 Speaker 2: I just I think, I think to if you listen back to your original thoughts on this company, even you will admit that that pitch is maybe not going to work for them. 00:45:08 Speaker 3: Well, nothing else is working, Bridger. 00:45:11 Speaker 2: I want to see. 00:45:12 Speaker 3: I want to see the financials as Smarties. I can't imagine. 00:45:15 Speaker 2: Well, I'm as close as you're gonna be able to get to it because they sent me free stuff and I don't even know what them what they are. I got smart as its own company. 00:45:22 Speaker 3: I want to see. Can't that's a Canadian? 00:45:25 Speaker 2: Oh is it Canadian? 00:45:27 Speaker 3: And it's it's own Oh no, it's Jersey Well making it in Canada. 00:45:32 Speaker 2: That it seems Canadian. And I mean that with no offense to Canadian. 00:45:37 Speaker 3: I think Canadians doing well with less right, it is its own company. 00:45:42 Speaker 2: There you go. 00:45:43 Speaker 3: I wonder what else they're making. I've got to be making something good. It probably saw gas or something. 00:45:49 Speaker 2: They're my friends, Okay, I understand we've had some fun and poke some fun at them, but you know they're they're my and Smarties. I'm not asking for more. I have a lot, so no need to give me more. 00:46:00 Speaker 3: He's giving them away. 00:46:01 Speaker 2: I'm literally I'm giving them away on a podcast where I'm not going to spend my own money. So please, for the love of God, we're good. 00:46:08 Speaker 3: I mean, I says family owned since nineteen forty nine. So now I like that. The guilt is creeping good. 00:46:14 Speaker 2: So maybe I have another bite of the Tropical. 00:46:16 Speaker 3: What do you think the Tropical has got to leave the market immediately. That was a huge mistake. This sour was a great pivot to gen Z get rid of regular flavor. 00:46:27 Speaker 2: So it sounds if you're you're in earnest business advice is sour own sour only. 00:46:35 Speaker 3: Maybe do a little work with the old fashioned graphic so it's not just seniors buying them anymore. I agree, And maybe you sell them in bangs. 00:46:43 Speaker 2: You know what smarties are great for is to tell the kids of the neighborhood around Halloween stop coming here. Don't come back. I don't like you ringing my doorbell. Leave me alone. 00:46:53 Speaker 3: There's something wrong in this home. 00:46:55 Speaker 2: We are alcoholics. Go away. This was in a roar we hate you. 00:47:02 Speaker 3: Yeah, I think that that is probably its main function. 00:47:05 Speaker 2: Yeah, so there you go. You're welcome. 00:47:07 Speaker 3: But we wish the smartiest family the best best. 00:47:11 Speaker 2: And thank you for all the free smarties. Yeah, and to be clear, Bridger loved the sour after the Tropical. The sour worked. It's just the texture. 00:47:19 Speaker 3: It had to be a retrospective taste. But he had to look yeah, like I didn't know what I had at the Yes, so that's gift one. 00:47:28 Speaker 2: Okay, let's see this one again. I don't remember what. 00:47:33 Speaker 3: Okay, it's kind of a I would say, like a record vinyl record shaped or calendar wall calendar shaped thing. I assume whatever this is is also just made of smarty. 00:47:44 Speaker 2: It's a big smarty Oh fantastic, that's what it was. That's right. 00:47:48 Speaker 3: Wow, it's a Mama and Papa's vinyl. Yes, they're twenty greatest hits. 00:47:52 Speaker 2: Yes. 00:47:52 Speaker 3: Now this is where I actually believe that the Mamas and Papas have some great songs. Yeah, I mean more than their two big hits, right, but I feel like we know California Dreamman the hit and Monday Monday yep, and then can you name it as seen on TV? 00:48:08 Speaker 2: Yes, I know you've worked in TV, so I thought that would be very you might know it. 00:48:12 Speaker 3: No, I can't name a third okay, And speaking of canceling the okay, it's Monday, Monday, and then the second track is twelve thirty young girls are coming to the Canyon. 00:48:22 Speaker 2: So that's uh, I'm not I'm not co signing the I didn't write it. 00:48:27 Speaker 3: They've got a lot of hits, got I mean, I guess this is does say hits. 00:48:31 Speaker 2: Yeah, well it's up from TV, so you know they're they're not nobody's the mom is in the papas and are you a fan? 00:48:38 Speaker 3: No? 00:48:39 Speaker 2: Where does that come from? I had a big box of records, okay, and I thought I'm going to give Bridge a record apparently, but I don't know why I picked that one. I think because it looked a little funny and it seems kind of familiar. 00:48:54 Speaker 3: Oh yeah, everybody's familiar with the Mama's Yeah, everyone's familiar with Mama cass Elliott. Yes, she's got at least one great hit. Yes sing what's it called? Uh? Yes, yourself it's actually a great song. I can't remember Mama cass Elliott. I'm looking, but you know she's also she became a punchline, sing your own kind of music, singing. Okay, she became a good lady, yes, because she It's just like Elvis on the toilet, right, just somebody dies and then. 00:49:20 Speaker 2: Somebody dies and then you remember one can't eat, right she died? Except like, okay, that's cool. 00:49:26 Speaker 3: Did Elvis actually die on the toilet? 00:49:29 Speaker 2: I think I'm gonna be honest, I believe there is truth to that one. 00:49:33 Speaker 3: But I'm and remained sitting on or did he fall off? 00:49:37 Speaker 2: I think I think I hope remains sitting and midpoop if my records are correct, and I do have a lot of records that's shown in evidence right there. 00:49:48 Speaker 3: I mean like, I feel like that feels like a myth where he was on the bathroom floor. Yeah, well, the toilet very really paints a picture. 00:49:55 Speaker 2: I also would like to think that if you were dying and you have had even a breath left, you would have the wherewithal to be like, I'm gonna get off the toilet, like I can simply will myself to the grounds to end this because the nobody, you know what I mean. It's like if you were if you were dying while masturbating, I would think I could at least, yeah, yank my pants up or put a blanket or something, you know, to just make it so. They were like, yeah, he was doing a bottomless nap. You know how he did that? Winn theo he winny the pood to bed. Yeah. 00:50:32 Speaker 3: I feel like Elvis must have been seated. 00:50:35 Speaker 2: I think he was a big He's a big guy on a lot of pills, a lot of drugs. 00:50:43 Speaker 3: Do we know was he at home or was he in Vegas? 00:50:46 Speaker 2: Or where was he again? He's only going to say, but first of all, I can get your eyes on the toilet, no problem. You just let me know what works for you. 00:50:55 Speaker 3: And he's on the floor next to his toilet in the bathroom of his Graceland mansion. Interesting speculation about the toys. 00:51:02 Speaker 2: I don't know if grace is the right title for that place. I know that's a tough one, especially if it's to But I still choose to believe he was pooping. 00:51:11 Speaker 3: Yeah, probably What else was he doing in the bathroom? My daddy was doing his makeup. No, I'm sure he wasn't flossing. 00:51:17 Speaker 2: And they wasn't doing karate. Was not flossing, You don't you don't get like that and go, hey, I know, a gum disease is like a real serious problem. You don't want to get into nevadas. Elvis, you're peeing your pants because of pills. Oh no, but you got to take care of your mouth. That'll shave two three years off. I'm reading at. 00:51:35 Speaker 3: Least one person on Earth in the history of civilization has died while flossing. 00:51:40 Speaker 2: Maybe from if you wait long enough. 00:51:42 Speaker 3: There's a lot of bleeding blood loss there. 00:51:45 Speaker 2: There's a lot of blood like imagine bleeding out. 00:51:48 Speaker 3: If you're on blood dinners. You gotta be careful. Yeah, so I guess that's that far from I would love for that to have slowly blood telling everyone we told him just let it go. 00:52:04 Speaker 2: Use a water pic. You use a water pic. I've got a bunch of picts. 00:52:07 Speaker 3: But he's stuck to his gun. That would be he's. 00:52:11 Speaker 2: Stuck to his gun. 00:52:12 Speaker 3: That funeral, the vibe, Oh, it's a tough one. 00:52:15 Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean it takes everybody at some point. I don't think it does. Dad. 00:52:21 Speaker 3: I looked into us. 00:52:22 Speaker 2: We do open casket, open mouth, we really. 00:52:28 Speaker 3: So who gave you this box of records? 00:52:30 Speaker 2: Uh? It was acquired from my childhood, and my brother had a very good record this kind of My brother was twelve years older. Okay, so he had a lot of good records. Right, But we're all now finding that I'm holding onto these for some reason we know. 00:52:44 Speaker 3: Not do you have a record player? 00:52:45 Speaker 2: No, that's okay. That's where the issue relies. Yeah, that's a big issue. Are you storing them in like the basement or something in the in the garage? 00:52:53 Speaker 3: Oh okay, so this is just a worthless thing for you to own then? 00:52:56 Speaker 2: Yeah, But it's a great gift. 00:52:57 Speaker 3: So it's an excellent gift. 00:52:58 Speaker 2: It's a lovely So I don't want it to take away from the emotional resonance of what I've done here. 00:53:04 Speaker 3: No, I'm just saying, in your own home, get a record player. 00:53:08 Speaker 2: Yes, but then you know what I mean. 00:53:10 Speaker 3: Space space, But would you what are you doing with the space? 00:53:14 Speaker 2: Hey? That's tight and I'm not living large. 00:53:16 Speaker 3: It's my problem is not the record player taking up space. It's the records themselves, because I know if I were to buy one, suddenly I'm buying these things are quite large. Where am I putting them? 00:53:26 Speaker 2: I sometimes on on the road, I'll end up whatever. Maybe some weird venue and they will have a green room with a record player and records and I will be like, this is awesome, right, and you will put them on. I think as a having it in my home. I see that as something that I like, and then practically it's just happening. 00:53:50 Speaker 3: It's not happening, right, So that makes it's. 00:53:52 Speaker 2: Just my friend has My friend Burns has a record player and records and he actually uses them, uses them, values them. But but he's an idiot. He is a huge idiot. 00:54:03 Speaker 3: His life is a disaster. 00:54:04 Speaker 2: Life is a he's a disaster, and were extremely when he's a just bridger. He's an idiot. He is an idiot man. So so I don't know what he's doing. 00:54:15 Speaker 3: But okash, I'll come across a hotel room with a record player. Oh no, I love that, but then I don't even use it there. 00:54:20 Speaker 2: But then they don't have a c and you're gone, guys, could we just please the windows are busted out? 00:54:26 Speaker 1: Yeah? 00:54:27 Speaker 2: Please please? It's beautiful. I love it. I love that there's a ski on the wall. Come to thinking of this whole broken, to think of this as an invasion. 00:54:37 Speaker 3: There's the screaming every time you break into a place like, this is a beautiful hotel. 00:54:42 Speaker 2: They're gonna get a nice review. This is a very nice place. 00:54:45 Speaker 3: I'm gonna tell my friends about. Can I get a late check out? The phone's ripped out of the wall, and maybe it wanted be great? 00:54:52 Speaker 2: Oh thank you. 00:54:54 Speaker 3: The clumsy burglar strikes again. 00:54:58 Speaker 2: They catch it. He thought it was a hollow. He keeps thinking that these are just little B and b's. This man needs a vacation. 00:55:04 Speaker 3: Yeah, oh well, this is an exciting thing for me to own, despite not having a record player. 00:55:09 Speaker 2: Now what are you doing with all the gifts from this podcast? Bridge? 00:55:11 Speaker 3: It's a really good question. 00:55:13 Speaker 2: There, They go on. 00:55:13 Speaker 3: Occasionally I get one that's practical that I can kind of, you know, integrate into my life. Changes things. Maybe one percent better, Okay, I woulday less than one percent. That's a big percentage for. 00:55:23 Speaker 2: Life good is actually about it? 00:55:26 Speaker 3: One out of one hundred. 00:55:27 Speaker 2: It's a lot. 00:55:29 Speaker 3: But I'll use them other things like behind you Those are some gifts we've received over the years. 00:55:34 Speaker 2: Okay, that are more decor and. 00:55:36 Speaker 3: Not really they have really no practice. I think that is a great Yeah, absolutely, that is a great king as long as it fits under one of those that it's going to be like that you're carving out a way to not put it up there. I'll be honest, but I think it'll look great up there. I actually think it's going to probably go behind that toilet plunger gun. 00:55:54 Speaker 2: Okay, which is a great That's an excellent gift. What is the best gift? And I understand I'm in the running. I don't need the the I don't need the gold. 00:56:04 Speaker 3: You're you're saying, what's number two? What is the second best gift? That's a very good question. I should put some more thought into this because I can never I always panic. I'm like the first one that I got that was like, wow, this is just a nice gift that I would get like a wedding. Is cola skull against me? Like a like a nice waffle iron? 00:56:23 Speaker 2: Oh that's great and you use that? Well? 00:56:25 Speaker 3: I don't. But it's like if I ever want to make waffles, because I would never buy myself a waffle Yeah. I had a very old waffle iron that I would used to reheat pizza. 00:56:34 Speaker 2: As a When when was this wauches through that time? 00:56:38 Speaker 3: This was well within my adult life, Okay, And I actually recommend it. 00:56:42 Speaker 2: Eight. Walk me through that. 00:56:43 Speaker 3: You flipped the fold the pizza like cold pizza in the Okay, all right, you fold it in half, put it in the waffle iron. It turns it into an incredible sand Okay, all right, the best way to reheat. 00:56:55 Speaker 2: I really want to aid it on you. Yeah, I really like that. 00:56:58 Speaker 3: It seemed it seems so wild to me. 00:57:00 Speaker 2: I had to try it. 00:57:01 Speaker 3: Yes, but now I have two waff lions, one for pizza, one for waffles. Should I ever want to impress. 00:57:05 Speaker 2: It is now your current state. You have two waffle makers, one for pizzaaff Lion rich, you are the Elon Musk of waffle ankle deep you are really showing off. Yeah, some people don't have one, just so that was me, to be honest, that's me. I've lived that life. Well, I know how the others we get things are good. Good Lord. 00:57:30 Speaker 3: The other one that's truly changed my life is, uh, the comedy writer John Milson gave me a car garbage camp. 00:57:37 Speaker 2: Oh yeah, as driving as much as I do, probably have an absolute must. 00:57:41 Speaker 3: I can't believe I lived such a huge period of my life without one. 00:57:44 Speaker 2: It is awesome. 00:57:45 Speaker 3: There were receipts I was living in a sea of receipts and straw bress. 00:57:49 Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean if we're not gonna literally it's it's crazy, especially here. 00:57:53 Speaker 3: You drive so much that you have to be expected, got to be able to put the stuff in a garbage and you. 00:57:58 Speaker 2: Getting home is different then you you know, you get home whatever? 00:58:02 Speaker 3: Right? 00:58:03 Speaker 1: Right? 00:58:03 Speaker 2: I live. My car is Squalor and I have a garbageh squaler still with the Yeah, so you're not even using the garbage case. 00:58:10 Speaker 3: I use it until it's overflowing. 00:58:12 Speaker 2: Correct. 00:58:13 Speaker 3: Raccoons are going through it. 00:58:14 Speaker 2: They live with me. Things are bad, but that's great, Okay, all right, Well I like to be in the running. I like that. And your legacy to me after this will be the two off lions that will be your legacy. Yeah. 00:58:28 Speaker 3: I've basically gotten at least gifts that are nice decorations. I give away gifts at live shows. 00:58:34 Speaker 2: Oh that's great. That's a slow release of them. I have a I don't know. I hope I wouldn't be this person will not be at SIP. But I know a comedian named Rob Gleeson who has a story and it's in he know. He tells the story and stand up. But he was in the lobby at the breakfast station in a hotel and he saw a guy take the you know sometimes you can make like pancakes offline. He took the batter and poured it in the toaster and then turn the toaster down, and he sort of just stood there watching the guy ruin a toaster. Somebody had to try it. The logic's almost there. You're sniffing around something. But boil boy. Oh god, that's incredible. 00:59:21 Speaker 3: I'm gonna do that. 00:59:23 Speaker 2: No, Britt, that's nothing. What that's Elvis? Shit, don't do that. What are you talking about? He died pouring waffle batter into a toaster electric cuted. He Oh, that would have been good. 00:59:36 Speaker 3: Uh okay, I think we should play a game. Okay, great, We're gonna play a game called Gift to a Curse. But I need a number between one and ten from you. 00:59:42 Speaker 2: Six. 00:59:43 Speaker 3: Okay. I have to do some light calculating to get our game pieces. So right now, you can promote, recommend, do whatever you want. 00:59:48 Speaker 2: I don't love how you're sort of making it like a little menial task that nobody will enjoy. Okay. Gareth rynolds dot com for shows, I'm on the road a lot. I will be actually doing show. I was in California when this comes out, but I'm always on the road. Also, I have my podcast The Doll Up, which will be on tour in March, so you can go to lluppodcast dot com for that. I also have a show called Next We Have, which is like a segmented show. Like I said, Bridger was on that. And then I have another one called We're Here to Help with Jake Johnson, which is a call in advice show. I do a ton of stuff on YouTube, so you can go to Gareth Reynolds TV on YouTube and watch that. Also, I'll have a talk show coming out that is a completely separate thing by the time this is airing, so you know, there you go. That's a bunch of stupid shit. 01:00:36 Speaker 3: Gareth, don't be shy. I named the other fifteen podcast. 01:00:38 Speaker 2: Okay. So also I do one called Gifts Are Necessary. It's basically a waffle iron accumulation show. I like to look at it like that. 01:00:48 Speaker 3: No, everybody go find Gareth online. Is wonderful at Reynolds Gareth on social media. 01:00:52 Speaker 2: Sorry Bridget Oh. 01:00:53 Speaker 3: Yeah, of course, of course, I apologie. This is how we play gift ruckers. Okay, I'm going to name three things. Okay'll tell me if they're a gift or a curse and why. Okay, then I'll tell you if you're right or wrong, because there are correct answers and you can lose the game. 01:01:06 Speaker 2: It feels like it's more of a taste thing. But okay, it. 01:01:10 Speaker 3: Feels like you're just kind of getting ahead of the story here. It feels like you're kind of doing the same thing a little bit. To be honest with you, it feels like that's when the started. 01:01:17 Speaker 2: But go ahead, Valentine, all right. 01:01:19 Speaker 3: This first one is thank you, I love you too. This is from a listener named John. Gift or a curse. When an item doesn't scan it check out and the customer says it must be free, then. 01:01:29 Speaker 2: That's absolutely a gift. That is that is a society's way of saying, this is our small way of getting back at the rich. You are allowed to take this wrong. What this is a curse? 01:01:45 Speaker 3: This is this is the person trying listen. Every service person on earth has heard every little joke that a customer has said thousands of times. They are now they are a captive audience behind the little desk or whatever they're checking. They have heard the joke it must be free then, over and over and over, and they still have to laugh at it. 01:02:06 Speaker 2: How about the electronic checkout. 01:02:10 Speaker 3: Now that I say that for every item at the electronic checkout, this must be free, then this must be. 01:02:15 Speaker 2: I think we're all saying the same thing. Just just go crazy at the self checkout. Yes, okay, all right, well I'm wrong, but I do think of it. I think very quickly. I one time went to a thrift store when I was a kid with my friend and we saw Ventriloquist dummy and it had a price tag that was handwritten and it was one hundred dollars and we were like, oh, that's too much. And my friend goes, that's handwritten, and the woman was like yeah, and he goes, couldn't you just give it to us for a dollar? And she goes, okay, she just gave it for a dollar. 01:02:45 Speaker 3: Certainly she wasn't the store owner. 01:02:46 Speaker 2: No, she was like our age. This was in high school, and she was like, I hate the store owner. 01:02:51 Speaker 3: No. We used to do that at thrift store in Utah, where that you would peel the price tag off and put it on other objects and interesting like theft. 01:03:01 Speaker 2: It does sound like that. What a confession. 01:03:03 Speaker 3: I encourage people to shoplift if they're safe. I agree if it's from a company with a large sack of money, as long as you know you're going to get away with it. 01:03:12 Speaker 2: And yeah, and and be very aware of what each thing costs. 01:03:15 Speaker 1: You know. 01:03:16 Speaker 2: Wait, why, well, because steal the expensive ship, you don't. Don't steal the salary, steal the blueberries. All right, So you've gotten one wrong so far, and everybody hates that. We do need to keep bringing that up. 01:03:29 Speaker 3: Okay, anyway, okay, this is from a listener named Olivia Gift or a curse commercials for books, curse. 01:03:37 Speaker 2: Why. Look, I'm not happy about it. That air is over. We're done books. We've we've moved on. We're listening to them and saying that we're reading them. That's the whole thing. Now, wrong, what this is personal? 01:03:59 Speaker 3: This feels this may be personal for you. That's something you gotta work. First of all, Valentine, I want to come to this restaurant in the first place. 01:04:06 Speaker 2: Oh my god, he's doing that again. You had to coupon what? Excuse me? 01:04:15 Speaker 3: Maybe we just should go to your house and just eat a bunch of waffles and pizza. 01:04:19 Speaker 2: I begged you to do that. Oh Lord, I just I can't with you. I still love you, but this is tough. 01:04:26 Speaker 3: I've got news for you. 01:04:27 Speaker 2: Wow. 01:04:29 Speaker 3: Who commercials for books incredible feeling a whole new genre as far as I'm concerned. In the middle of a TV show, suddenly someone's advertising a book to you. Also, I think this is probably the most reading most Americans will do in the course of a year. Is here a commercial for a book and then they'll say they were reading. Literacy is so important. These commercials for books are not. 01:04:51 Speaker 2: Saying I'm happy about it. I'm saying I'm being I'm having an honest conversation with myself about it. 01:04:56 Speaker 3: That doesn't make you right. 01:04:58 Speaker 2: Okay, let's your show. I like to invite you back to next we have because I have some stuff. I want to be a gun. That's the segment. Apologize for you. 01:05:12 Speaker 3: Okay, so you've gotten zero so far. Lord, let's hope you turn it around. This is from a listener, so hope you're more fair. 01:05:19 Speaker 2: Melinda. 01:05:20 Speaker 3: Melinda has submitted gift or a curse the in memoriam at the Oscars. 01:05:27 Speaker 2: Gift. I'm gonna say gift, and I'm gonna say gift because sometimes it actually does elicit some you know, you go, oh wow, I could argue both. 01:05:39 Speaker 3: Impossible. 01:05:40 Speaker 2: Well, you can't get both. It's interesting that I'm saying that. So I think either way where you land, it's not gonna be bad for me. I think we're But also if you're left off, it's it's a curse. But again, I will say gift. I like that moment. It's a nostalgic moment. But it is weird sometimes when you're the people who are getting, you know, like curtain call, when the guy who stole the show or the person who stole the show comes out and they get the lout. It's weird. When you know some editor it's like, oh my lord, Jack Pallets, Jackie Pallets, he's in every one of them. 01:06:23 Speaker 3: They they've got to do something about putting Jack balance in the in memorial every year. 01:06:28 Speaker 2: It's too much. We know he's dead. Stop opening that wound. That that God, if I would give anything for that to be a thing they did every year, like the Jimmy Kimmel Like we ran out of time. Sorry, Matt Damon but every year they jack pallets him the memorial. But you're ultimately saying gift shift. Correct, you've got one. I love the memorial. I love to see all the people. 01:06:55 Speaker 3: I also love when somebody gets left out because it creates some sort of controversy. Then the person gets even more attention. 01:07:01 Speaker 2: I agree. 01:07:02 Speaker 3: We get to and we get to the clappa meter. Yeah, I love to hear the clap. 01:07:06 Speaker 2: I know who are we? Sadist died through applause? Yes, I I think so. It'll be like the costume designer. I didn't know where Jackie Palace. 01:07:16 Speaker 3: And it's a nice reminder to everyone in the audience. Look what's coming. You got through award, look at your Look what's coming for now that I'm gonna personalize it. 01:07:25 Speaker 2: It's sad that I won't have it. 01:07:27 Speaker 3: Oh interesting, Why won't you have it? My boods, I'm not successful and I'm not what don't make me start the campaign now? It's not an Oscars campaign. I just I just want to be a jacent. 01:07:41 Speaker 2: Playing ball for that like, Oh no, I just would love to when I go materials. Please you guys get my evite about being on the in memoriam. 01:07:53 Speaker 3: Consider Gareth Renold, Well, I'm glad I went one for three that for you. 01:07:56 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's fine. 01:07:57 Speaker 3: You didn't give up. 01:07:58 Speaker 2: No, I'm not a very I don't do very well at anything like this. So it's thirty three is fine. 01:08:04 Speaker 3: Yeah, this kind of proves if you stick it out, you can still be a loser. 01:08:07 Speaker 2: Yeah. I don't know if that's the bottom line I would go with, to be quite honest, but you know whatever. 01:08:13 Speaker 3: Put that on a poster. I think we should answer a listener question, will you help me? 01:08:17 Speaker 2: Yes? All right, I hope that I do it right. 01:08:21 Speaker 3: People are writing into I said no gifts at gmail dot com, begging for answers. So we'll see what we can do for somebody. 01:08:28 Speaker 2: Let's see here. 01:08:29 Speaker 3: Okay, this is oh okay. Our wealthy cousin often returns our gifts to us, actually mails them back to us. She worries that our funds have been wasted. So it's a kindness of sorts. We, however, wear and display her gifts, whether we like them or not. Also a kindness, but also an unnecessary burden. Who is correct in this or which party is crazier? And that's from they didn't give their name. Grateful and conflicted on the frozen tundra. 01:08:53 Speaker 2: This is all. Oh, it's very dark. Yes, that is very Yes, this is. 01:08:57 Speaker 3: Fascinating to me. This person obviously they've got this wealthy you know person, this is very gilded age. 01:09:04 Speaker 2: Yes, they've written to us as a Rockefeller. 01:09:07 Speaker 3: Yes, the wealthy cousin is obviously knows they're in deep trouble. 01:09:12 Speaker 2: Yes. 01:09:12 Speaker 3: I always side with the wealthy, very very clear, very clear. Uh, no wealthy person can make a mistake, right, And this wealthy person, as they all are, has a big heart and they are sending it back. And meanwhile, this person who's in their weird little cabin, you know, shaking freeze or such a bad bad luck Max, you're bumming everyone out. They use their what you know, they're probably they're one dollar to go to the internet cafe to email mess so pathetic. I feel like I'm on the side of the rich person and this poor person. Maybe they could ask for a staff position at the manor. 01:09:57 Speaker 2: If it's a problem, a bell ringer or maybe dish cleaner. 01:10:00 Speaker 3: Right, if you care so much about this family relationship, yes, you know, go scrub the floors, mow the lawn manually. I don't want to see you on a writing lawnmower world. 01:10:09 Speaker 2: Lord, No, no, no, no, that's the calorie. 01:10:12 Speaker 3: Yes, I think. I think it's a pathetic and sad thing. And I can't believe they even wrote in to be honest, I uh, I don't know who's. 01:10:19 Speaker 2: Right in this one. I'll tell you whose play I like better is the one who's mailing it back. You like that? I do because I think it's a great way of saying without saying I don't care for what you got me. I think to always blame it on price is phenomenal. And I think if you listen to the two options, the one who always has to display it, that's annoying as shit. 01:10:46 Speaker 3: Why aren't they sending theirs back to them? That's a nice tit for tat. 01:10:50 Speaker 2: And I think what Bridger has just stumbled upon is your solution. You now engage in the I also mail it back to you and say it's too expensive warfare. That is exactly they've declared war on you and your gifts. It's time to fight back again. I'm the guy who brought the Smarties and the mom is in the Poppas record. I know gift culture and. 01:11:10 Speaker 3: By the way, this person has accumulated who knows how many gifts over the years. Put them all on a huge moving truck. 01:11:16 Speaker 2: Couldn't this year. It's a big box of returns and you're just gonna write on it. You really shouldn't have dump that on their lawn. Not that on the away. Yeah, and maybe what you do is next year, test them, get them something that is not expensive. Okay, oh interest, leave the price tag on it and see if it still comes back to you when it's nine to ninety nine. The right bag of dots. Give them a bag of dot. 01:11:45 Speaker 3: Dots feels like something the smartiest family's making. I wonder if they're agree they're in cahoots. 01:11:50 Speaker 2: At the very least you must, I will say you should try some dots. I should have brought you dies. 01:11:54 Speaker 3: I don't mind a dot textually, wait, no, no, no, preth Oh my god, I'm forgetting Lord Bridge dots. 01:12:01 Speaker 2: You like dots. I don't like dots. I want to be very clear, I don't. I would never really eat them and reach for a dots Yeah, same, nobody would. But if they've spilled out somewhere, just it's like nobody can. You don't care. There's only one item that can get dots off your teeth, and that's your index finger. Absolutely, there's that's not a toothpick or a toothbrush. Job. There's no water pick that will do that. No, it's it's there. It is just some it is. Yes, it is caked and living. 01:12:26 Speaker 3: Put a thimble on your finger and start digging. 01:12:28 Speaker 2: Yeah, you need a seller's kid. I think that that's the. 01:12:33 Speaker 3: Perfect solution for this person. I mean, I doubt they'll hear it. They don't have access to the internet. They wasted their money at the local internet cafe. 01:12:42 Speaker 2: Yeah, but we hope that maybe some yeah, maybe a bear or a dog can you know, send them, get a message to them somehow, or attacks. 01:12:52 Speaker 3: Then they end up in the hospital at one of the nurses listening to the show. 01:12:55 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a good test for your reach too. Yeah, that's good. I think that's great. 01:13:00 Speaker 3: We answered the question perfectly. 01:13:01 Speaker 2: Yeah, I agree. 01:13:02 Speaker 3: I've got you know for days. 01:13:05 Speaker 2: These smarties are going so many smarties to get through it. 01:13:08 Speaker 3: I mean these are lot speaking of emergency preparedness, actually best by AUGUSTA of twenty seven. Yeah, it feels like we should last like fifty years. 01:13:17 Speaker 2: Well, I think there are some things where I think they put expiration dates on them because you have to. 01:13:23 Speaker 3: It's all kind of a scam. 01:13:24 Speaker 2: Yes, like cough drops, What are they gonna not be a little candy milk? You cough drops done? The paper sticks to it. Oh, that's that's nature's way of saying this is done. We don't need the expiration. 01:13:38 Speaker 3: And this is a best spie doesn't say expiration. 01:13:40 Speaker 2: Best spie is a very that's that's very loyally right. Right, So you've got years on that. 01:13:45 Speaker 3: These probably are. 01:13:45 Speaker 2: You're gonna have twelve bottles of water, a bag of Smarties. You and I are going to be living in your parents' basement, a couple of Valentines trying to make it through the apocalypse. 01:13:53 Speaker 3: This is a very Valentine's codd candy. Interesting is actually interesting. 01:13:57 Speaker 2: I knew, well, thank you for being here, Bridger, an absolute pleasure, have such a good time with you. 01:14:02 Speaker 3: I likewise listener the podcast. We're slowing down, we're all slowing down. We're looking for an escape. You've been begging for an escape for the last little while. I'm gonna let you go. I love you, goodbye. I said no gifts is an exactly right production. Our senior producer is Ellis Nelson, and our episodes are beautifully mixed by Ben Holliday. The theme song is by Miracle Worker Amy Mann, and we couldn't do it without our booker, Patrick Cottner. You must follow the show on Instagram. At I said, no gifts, that's where you're going to see pictures of all these wonderful gifts I'm getting. And don't you want to see the gifts. 01:14:47 Speaker 2: Line? Why did you hear? Fun a man? 01:14:52 Speaker 1: Myself perfectly clear? But you're I guessed, tomm gotta come to me empty? And I said, no, guests, your own presence is presents enough. I already had too much stuff, So how do you dare to surbey me