1 00:00:03,400 --> 00:00:06,680 Speaker 1: Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of I Heart Radio. 2 00:00:09,200 --> 00:00:15,400 Speaker 1: Good Morning, This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. 3 00:00:16,480 --> 00:00:20,680 Speaker 1: Today's tip is about how to feel happier about your work, 4 00:00:21,520 --> 00:00:25,639 Speaker 1: whatever your work happens to be. If you can have 5 00:00:26,040 --> 00:00:30,720 Speaker 1: three particular sorts of experiences each day, you can most 6 00:00:30,760 --> 00:00:37,559 Speaker 1: likely have very good days over and over again. Today's 7 00:00:37,600 --> 00:00:42,680 Speaker 1: tip comes from ya Ll Shoenbrun's new book, Work, Parent Thrive. 8 00:00:44,000 --> 00:00:47,360 Speaker 1: This book is about cognitive strategies that can help you 9 00:00:47,440 --> 00:00:53,360 Speaker 1: navigate working parenthood with far less stress. In her book, 10 00:00:53,720 --> 00:00:56,920 Speaker 1: ya Ll has a chapter encouraging people to tend to 11 00:00:57,000 --> 00:01:04,039 Speaker 1: their happiness needs. What you might ask, are these happiness needs? Well, 12 00:01:04,080 --> 00:01:07,080 Speaker 1: there's pretty good evidence that people feel best about work 13 00:01:07,480 --> 00:01:12,360 Speaker 1: when they have three things that happen regularly. First, opportunities 14 00:01:12,400 --> 00:01:18,080 Speaker 1: to feel skillful, capable, or masterful. Second, connection to people 15 00:01:18,280 --> 00:01:22,880 Speaker 1: or causes they care about. And third, freedom to choose 16 00:01:22,920 --> 00:01:31,319 Speaker 1: their own actions. So basically progress, connection, autonomy. Now you 17 00:01:31,400 --> 00:01:34,160 Speaker 1: might be thinking, well, of course, those are three things 18 00:01:34,200 --> 00:01:37,959 Speaker 1: that sound great, but it is different to know that 19 00:01:38,040 --> 00:01:42,800 Speaker 1: those three things are important versus actually designing your days 20 00:01:43,040 --> 00:01:47,920 Speaker 1: to have experiences in each of these domains. What you 21 00:01:47,960 --> 00:01:51,840 Speaker 1: want to do is look through your days and identify 22 00:01:51,880 --> 00:01:57,760 Speaker 1: how you will experience this progress, connection and autonomy. If 23 00:01:57,800 --> 00:02:01,400 Speaker 1: you do that, you will have died to your happiness 24 00:02:01,400 --> 00:02:07,600 Speaker 1: needs and we'll probably be much happier. We can envision 25 00:02:07,640 --> 00:02:12,000 Speaker 1: many ways this might work. For instance, I feel particularly 26 00:02:12,080 --> 00:02:16,840 Speaker 1: skillful while creating second drafts of things. If I've got 27 00:02:16,840 --> 00:02:19,560 Speaker 1: a rough draft and I'm using my editing skills to 28 00:02:19,600 --> 00:02:24,320 Speaker 1: make the piece better, I can see massive progress and 29 00:02:24,440 --> 00:02:29,480 Speaker 1: this makes me feel very happy. I feel connection when 30 00:02:29,480 --> 00:02:32,239 Speaker 1: I have chats with other writers whose work I enjoy. 31 00:02:33,440 --> 00:02:36,960 Speaker 1: I feel autonomy when I decide what I would like 32 00:02:37,040 --> 00:02:40,919 Speaker 1: to work on. So for me, a good day might 33 00:02:41,000 --> 00:02:44,000 Speaker 1: involve spending the morning editing a piece I'm really into, 34 00:02:45,000 --> 00:02:47,440 Speaker 1: a lunch break where I have a video call with 35 00:02:47,480 --> 00:02:51,240 Speaker 1: a few writer friends, and then leaving the afternoon open 36 00:02:51,320 --> 00:02:53,680 Speaker 1: so I can decide what I'd like to work on 37 00:02:54,040 --> 00:02:59,400 Speaker 1: in the moment. Your experiences might be entirely different. Perhaps 38 00:02:59,400 --> 00:03:03,200 Speaker 1: a presentation to a group where you show your mastery, 39 00:03:03,560 --> 00:03:07,480 Speaker 1: a lunch with your direct reports making a decision to 40 00:03:07,639 --> 00:03:11,239 Speaker 1: green light a new program. But that would hit all 41 00:03:11,320 --> 00:03:14,880 Speaker 1: three domains too and would make for a great day. 42 00:03:16,480 --> 00:03:19,160 Speaker 1: We can also think of how to have these experiences 43 00:03:19,160 --> 00:03:22,960 Speaker 1: while doing the work of caring for family members. This 44 00:03:23,040 --> 00:03:27,040 Speaker 1: can be harder, as sometimes a sense of progress is 45 00:03:27,080 --> 00:03:32,799 Speaker 1: not nearly so obvious, but we can engineer it. Maybe 46 00:03:32,840 --> 00:03:35,960 Speaker 1: you find a really great book from the library and 47 00:03:36,040 --> 00:03:39,600 Speaker 1: make it through it with your kid. You have a 48 00:03:39,640 --> 00:03:43,520 Speaker 1: play date with another family whose company you enjoy, and 49 00:03:43,600 --> 00:03:45,840 Speaker 1: you plan out a day where you've chosen things you 50 00:03:45,880 --> 00:03:50,400 Speaker 1: find energizing, like a walk with the stroller and some 51 00:03:50,480 --> 00:03:55,840 Speaker 1: relaxation with a hobby during naptime. That day would likely 52 00:03:55,880 --> 00:03:58,000 Speaker 1: feel better than the sorts of days where we are 53 00:03:58,080 --> 00:04:03,360 Speaker 1: counting the hours until bedtime. So if you are looking 54 00:04:03,400 --> 00:04:07,000 Speaker 1: to experience more happiness in your work, whatever your work, 55 00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:11,920 Speaker 1: maybe see if you can create experiences in the three 56 00:04:11,960 --> 00:04:17,760 Speaker 1: domains yah L talks about in work parent thrive. Can 57 00:04:17,800 --> 00:04:21,520 Speaker 1: you feel skillful? Can you feel connected to something that 58 00:04:21,600 --> 00:04:25,800 Speaker 1: matters to you? Do you have at least sometime where 59 00:04:25,839 --> 00:04:30,120 Speaker 1: you feel free to choose your own actions. You can 60 00:04:30,160 --> 00:04:33,680 Speaker 1: certainly look back on a day and identify those kinds 61 00:04:33,720 --> 00:04:37,400 Speaker 1: of experiences, and that might be a good exercise for 62 00:04:37,440 --> 00:04:40,080 Speaker 1: a day that wasn't all you hoped it would be. 63 00:04:41,240 --> 00:04:43,960 Speaker 1: But it's even better to think through these things ahead 64 00:04:43,960 --> 00:04:50,760 Speaker 1: of time, as Yeah. L says when you experience competence, connectedness, 65 00:04:50,839 --> 00:04:57,760 Speaker 1: or autonomy, pause, acknowledge and relish that moment. Spotlight what's 66 00:04:57,760 --> 00:05:03,159 Speaker 1: going well. This practice us of savory will increase and 67 00:05:03,279 --> 00:05:10,119 Speaker 1: extend experiences of happiness in the meantime. This is Laura. 68 00:05:11,040 --> 00:05:15,479 Speaker 1: Thanks for listening, and here's to making the most of 69 00:05:15,560 --> 00:05:24,760 Speaker 1: our time. Hey, everybody, I'd love to hear from you. 70 00:05:24,760 --> 00:05:27,640 Speaker 1: You can send me your tips, your questions, or anything else. 71 00:05:28,400 --> 00:05:32,000 Speaker 1: Just connect with me on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram at 72 00:05:32,000 --> 00:05:37,520 Speaker 1: Before Breakfast pod that's B the number four, then Breakfast 73 00:05:37,880 --> 00:05:40,680 Speaker 1: p o D. You can also shoot me an email 74 00:05:40,720 --> 00:05:44,560 Speaker 1: at Before Breakfast podcast at i heeart media dot com 75 00:05:44,600 --> 00:05:47,120 Speaker 1: that Before Breakfast is spelled out with all the letters. 76 00:05:47,720 --> 00:05:49,800 Speaker 1: Thanks so much. Should I look forward to staying in touch. 77 00:05:55,640 --> 00:05:58,720 Speaker 1: Before Breakfast is a production of I heart Radio. For 78 00:05:58,839 --> 00:06:01,880 Speaker 1: more podcasts from I heart Radio, visit the I heart 79 00:06:01,960 --> 00:06:05,320 Speaker 1: Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your 80 00:06:05,320 --> 00:06:11,760 Speaker 1: favorite shows. Yeah,