1
00:00:03,400 --> 00:00:07,560
Speaker 1: Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of I Heart Radio.

2
00:00:08,960 --> 00:00:15,280
Speaker 1: Good Morning, This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast.

3
00:00:16,360 --> 00:00:21,840
Speaker 1: Today's tip is to have a weekly calendar meeting. If

4
00:00:21,880 --> 00:00:27,040
Speaker 1: you have a complicated life with logistics that involve another person,

5
00:00:28,240 --> 00:00:32,120
Speaker 1: chatting every week about who does what can go a

6
00:00:32,159 --> 00:00:38,879
Speaker 1: long way toward making life run smoothly. My husband and

7
00:00:38,920 --> 00:00:41,880
Speaker 1: I have had on and off calendar meetings over the years,

8
00:00:42,600 --> 00:00:45,720
Speaker 1: especially if we're both traveling a lot. It is critical

9
00:00:46,040 --> 00:00:49,480
Speaker 1: that we both know who is going where and when.

10
00:00:51,080 --> 00:00:53,519
Speaker 1: But we are far from the only people who do this.

11
00:00:54,760 --> 00:00:59,040
Speaker 1: Writer and speaker Amy Julia Becker recently wrote a blog

12
00:00:59,080 --> 00:01:03,160
Speaker 1: post where she identified a weekly calendar meeting with her

13
00:01:03,240 --> 00:01:07,600
Speaker 1: husband as one of the most important factors contributing to

14
00:01:07,640 --> 00:01:12,720
Speaker 1: their marital happiness. Every week, Amy Julia and her husband

15
00:01:13,000 --> 00:01:15,319
Speaker 1: talk through what they need to do to make their

16
00:01:15,360 --> 00:01:19,240
Speaker 1: family life function. Who needs to be driven where and

17
00:01:19,319 --> 00:01:24,160
Speaker 1: when evening weekend or travel commitments that she and her

18
00:01:24,200 --> 00:01:27,839
Speaker 1: partner have, appointments for the kids that need to be scheduled.

19
00:01:28,400 --> 00:01:32,680
Speaker 1: You get the idea. As Amy Julia puts it, there's

20
00:01:32,800 --> 00:01:37,200
Speaker 1: nothing romantic about it, but it keeps us from chasing

21
00:01:37,280 --> 00:01:42,080
Speaker 1: after each other. With texts and emails and irritation when

22
00:01:42,080 --> 00:01:45,080
Speaker 1: we just need to know who is picking merrily up

23
00:01:45,080 --> 00:01:48,240
Speaker 1: from soccer on Wednesday, and who is going to call

24
00:01:48,320 --> 00:01:52,080
Speaker 1: about the leaking sink, and whether a vacation next spring

25
00:01:52,680 --> 00:01:57,560
Speaker 1: is in the budget. Calendar meetings can be especially beneficial

26
00:01:57,960 --> 00:02:01,080
Speaker 1: when there is one partner who loves scheduling and managing

27
00:02:01,120 --> 00:02:06,840
Speaker 1: logistics and another who doesn't, or, perhaps the more likely scenario,

28
00:02:07,680 --> 00:02:11,320
Speaker 1: one partner who winds up doing it all and resents

29
00:02:11,919 --> 00:02:16,480
Speaker 1: that the other partner does not. The partner who doesn't

30
00:02:16,520 --> 00:02:19,760
Speaker 1: like dealing with schedules and logistics might not naturally want

31
00:02:19,800 --> 00:02:23,440
Speaker 1: to schedule a calendar meeting, but he or she will

32
00:02:23,480 --> 00:02:29,640
Speaker 1: probably appreciate this. If there is a calendar meeting, that

33
00:02:29,960 --> 00:02:33,480
Speaker 1: is the time when logistics get discussed and they won't

34
00:02:33,520 --> 00:02:37,720
Speaker 1: have to deal with these matters all week long. The

35
00:02:37,800 --> 00:02:41,239
Speaker 1: partner who does like schedules in logistics, or who winds

36
00:02:41,320 --> 00:02:45,079
Speaker 1: up dealing with the bulk of these things, benefits from

37
00:02:45,120 --> 00:02:48,799
Speaker 1: knowing that there is a designated time when their partner

38
00:02:48,840 --> 00:02:52,359
Speaker 1: will be ready to engage on these topics and won't

39
00:02:52,360 --> 00:02:58,800
Speaker 1: find conversation about them annoying. Of course, romantic partners aren't

40
00:02:58,800 --> 00:03:01,480
Speaker 1: the only ones for who whom a weekly calendar meeting

41
00:03:01,520 --> 00:03:05,360
Speaker 1: can be helpful. You may find that a calendar meeting

42
00:03:05,360 --> 00:03:09,200
Speaker 1: with older kids or your child care provider keeps your

43
00:03:09,240 --> 00:03:12,560
Speaker 1: life at home running smoothly, or that check ins with

44
00:03:12,639 --> 00:03:17,160
Speaker 1: your assistant at work keep your professional life in order.

45
00:03:18,720 --> 00:03:22,000
Speaker 1: But whoever you need to meet with, the basic topics

46
00:03:22,040 --> 00:03:26,880
Speaker 1: can be the same. What's happening that one or both

47
00:03:26,919 --> 00:03:30,880
Speaker 1: of us needs to know about, what needs to get

48
00:03:30,919 --> 00:03:34,480
Speaker 1: done or decided, and how will we make it happen.

49
00:03:35,880 --> 00:03:39,520
Speaker 1: What's on our minds that we need to share. When

50
00:03:39,560 --> 00:03:43,080
Speaker 1: you walk through these things, your home life will feel

51
00:03:43,160 --> 00:03:48,240
Speaker 1: less like a catastrophe and more like a well oiled machine.

52
00:03:49,400 --> 00:03:53,120
Speaker 1: Well some of the time, but even if it isn't

53
00:03:53,160 --> 00:03:56,760
Speaker 1: a well oiled machine, it will probably be better then

54
00:03:56,800 --> 00:04:00,920
Speaker 1: if you are both just winging it. If you try

55
00:04:00,960 --> 00:04:03,800
Speaker 1: having a weekly calendar meeting with your partner or another

56
00:04:03,880 --> 00:04:07,440
Speaker 1: person whose life is closely linked with yours, you can

57
00:04:07,520 --> 00:04:10,920
Speaker 1: let me know how it goes at Laura at Laura

58
00:04:11,040 --> 00:04:17,520
Speaker 1: Vanderkam dot com. In the meantime, this is Laura. Thanks

59
00:04:17,560 --> 00:04:29,440
Speaker 1: for listening, and here's to making the moose of our time. Hey, everybody,

60
00:04:29,640 --> 00:04:31,760
Speaker 1: I'd love to hear from you. You can send me

61
00:04:31,800 --> 00:04:35,440
Speaker 1: your tips, your questions, or anything else. Just connect with

62
00:04:35,480 --> 00:04:39,839
Speaker 1: me on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram at Before Breakfast Pod.

63
00:04:40,560 --> 00:04:44,880
Speaker 1: That's b E the number four, then Breakfast p o D.

64
00:04:45,760 --> 00:04:49,240
Speaker 1: You can also shoot me an email at Before Breakfast podcast.

65
00:04:49,400 --> 00:04:52,240
Speaker 1: At i heeart media dot com that Before Breakfast is

66
00:04:52,279 --> 00:04:55,000
Speaker 1: spelled out with all the letters. Thanks so much, I

67
00:04:55,040 --> 00:05:03,159
Speaker 1: look forward to staying in touch. Before Breakfast is a

68
00:05:03,160 --> 00:05:06,440
Speaker 1: production of I heart Radio. For more podcasts from I

69
00:05:06,520 --> 00:05:10,320
Speaker 1: heart Radio, visit the i heart Radio apps, Apple Podcasts,

70
00:05:10,600 --> 00:05:13,440
Speaker 1: or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. Yea