Speaker 1: Hey guys, welcome to I Do Part two, the podcast
Speaker 1: where we talk about all the stuff that happens when
Speaker 1: the marriage doesn't work out, or when maybe you were
Speaker 1: married for many years and life just happened and now
Speaker 1: you find yourself back on your own for the very
Speaker 1: first time. I'm Cheryl Burke, one of your celebrity mentors
Speaker 1: here on the pod, and I think what a lot
Speaker 1: of people have learned about me I have to say
Speaker 1: through this podcast and this show is that I take
Speaker 1: my finances pretty seriously. I've been really open about my
Speaker 1: thoughts on prenups, divorce, and so today I wanted to
Speaker 1: talk about money and relationships. Get sticky. My guest today
Speaker 1: is a founder, CEO and the host of the podcast
Speaker 1: Her Money, and she's a New York Times bestselling author
Speaker 1: of Women With Money. Please welcome Jeene Chatsky to the pod.
Speaker 1: Welcome to I DO Part two. How are you doing?
Speaker 1: I'm good.
Speaker 2: Thanks for having me, of.
Speaker 1: Course, thanks for coming on. Let's just get right into it. So,
Speaker 1: for people who have gone through divorce, would you say
Speaker 1: that when you start dating again, like, how long into
Speaker 1: the dating phase do you just ask about credit scores
Speaker 1: and being completely transparent about you know each other's finances.
Speaker 2: I don't think complete transparency is something that you have
Speaker 2: to something that you have to approach until you know
Speaker 2: that this is a relationship that at least has at
Speaker 2: least has some legs, right, And I say this, God no,
Speaker 2: and I am I was divorced. So I was married
Speaker 2: for a long time, had two kids, got divorced at
Speaker 2: age forty or separated at age forty, and got remarried
Speaker 2: about five years later. And so I've been through this
Speaker 2: and know exactly what you need to cough up and when.
Speaker 2: And here's the thing. You don't want to be dishonest.
Speaker 2: You never want to be dishonest. You never want to
Speaker 2: hide important facts about your financial life. But I think
Speaker 2: that the most important thing is to align on with
Speaker 2: a potential new lifetime partner or even somebody that you're
Speaker 2: going to just date for a long time. Are hey,
Speaker 2: do we have the same ideas of goals? Do we
Speaker 2: have the same ideas of values? Do we think the
Speaker 2: same way about spend a lot of money on dinner
Speaker 2: or a little money on dinner? How do we feel
Speaker 2: about our travel vacations? And what's on my plate that
Speaker 2: I need to take care of and what's on your
Speaker 2: plate that you need to take care of? And how
Speaker 2: are we going to have our own life with these
Speaker 2: separate responsibilities existing.
Speaker 1: To the side, I think, all, yeah, I hear you,
Speaker 1: and I believe that is maybe an initial conversation when
Speaker 1: you have chosen to take this relationship seriously. But like,
Speaker 1: there's also debt, and if you do marry each other,
Speaker 1: it becomes your debt.
Speaker 2: And it's well, not necessarily, it doesn't necessarily, no, not
Speaker 2: even if you don't sign a prenup. So if I
Speaker 2: come into and by the way, I think you should
Speaker 2: sign a prenup. Right in many second marriages, you come
Speaker 2: in with a house or a business, or children or assets,
Speaker 2: an expected inheritance, sign a prenup. It's no big deal.
Speaker 1: Well for some it is.
Speaker 2: Well maybe, I mean, I don't think it should be
Speaker 2: a big deal. I think it's a big deal because
Speaker 2: we make it a big deal. I think it's a
Speaker 2: big deal because we give it emotional heft that maybe
Speaker 2: it doesn't really deserve.
Speaker 1: I agree, because you have to separate the emotion and
Speaker 1: the fact that you know your two individuals. You each
Speaker 1: have your own finances that you've either worked and or
Speaker 1: going to inherit and respect that as an individual person.
Speaker 1: I think that with men, I've experienced that there's a
Speaker 1: lot of shame behind money and there's a lot of
Speaker 1: and that's when the emotions maybe are not necessarily communicated
Speaker 1: because that person may not know how or there's shame
Speaker 1: period and they don't want to talk about it. So
Speaker 1: like it does get emotional complicated.
Speaker 2: I think, yeah, I mean, I'm certainly not gonna spend
Speaker 2: after spending thirty years writing about money, I'm certainly not
Speaker 2: gonna argue that fact.
Speaker 1: Right.
Speaker 2: That's it's totally true. There is a lot of shame.
Speaker 2: There's a lot of you know, if you feel like
Speaker 2: you have too little, there's shame. If you feel like
Speaker 2: you have debt, there's shame. If you feel like there's
Speaker 2: too much, there's guilt. Right, If you feel like you're
Speaker 2: living in a way that you perhaps don't deserve to live,
Speaker 2: there's guilt. And all of these emotional forces fight themselves.
Speaker 2: But let me just come back to that debt thing
Speaker 2: for a second, because it's important if you come into
Speaker 2: a relationship to a marriage and you've got student loan debt,
Speaker 2: or you've got a credit card that you owe money on,
Speaker 2: or a mortgage that you borrowed money on, that's your debt.
Speaker 2: That's not your spouse's debt money. If you get married
Speaker 2: and you borrow money together, that's both of your debt.
Speaker 2: But you can and part of a prenup is keeping
Speaker 2: your debts separate, so you don't want to co mingle.
Speaker 2: You don't want to start taking responsibility for each other's
Speaker 2: debts because things get messy, and you want to understand
Speaker 2: what that person's responsibilities are and how it might impact
Speaker 2: your life. Because if somebody comes into a marriage or
Speaker 2: a relationship and they've already got a boatload of debt,
Speaker 2: chances are they also have a not great credit score,
Speaker 2: and that's going to make the goal of buying a
Speaker 2: place for the two of you to live harder. Right,
Speaker 2: That's that's just going to get in the way of
Speaker 2: the life that you want to live. So you've got
Speaker 2: to be honest about these things. But you don't have
Speaker 2: to pay his credit card bills.
Speaker 1: Okay, good to know. Good to know, especially for those
Speaker 1: that are maybe in a similar you know or wise
Speaker 1: in a similar situation. But how about if let's say
Speaker 1: your house is about to be for club, right, how
Speaker 1: about that and then you marry into that like that,
Speaker 1: does that not fall into your lap whatsoever? But what
Speaker 1: if there's no prenup, it's not your debt still, no
Speaker 1: matter what. Okay, unless you are on the deed of
Speaker 1: that house, got it.
Speaker 2: If it's if it's your partner's house, it's it's not
Speaker 2: your debt.
Speaker 1: Now is that in the state, in the whole country
Speaker 1: or is that just specific too because it's.
Speaker 2: Your state there state by state laws and in community
Speaker 2: property states. It does get a little squishy. But as
Speaker 2: far as I understand it, and I am not a lawyer,
Speaker 2: but I have done this for a long time. Yeah,
Speaker 2: it's not your debt. Where where it gets messy is
Speaker 2: if you are married to somebody and you're living in
Speaker 2: this house and that house gets foreclosed on whether or
Speaker 2: not you're legally responsible to kick in some money to
Speaker 2: pay for that house. You're going to kick in some
Speaker 2: money to pay for that house, right, yeah, because because
Speaker 2: of course that's that's what you're to do. You're gonna
Speaker 2: look at your life in many cases and you're gonna say,
Speaker 2: I've got some money, let me, let me do this.
Speaker 2: And unless you then really paper it up, you have
Speaker 2: co mingled these assets, and that money of yours has
Speaker 2: just gone into that house of his. It's kind of
Speaker 2: like I've gotten letters from from some of my readers
Speaker 2: that at her Money, which is my company, my blog,
Speaker 2: and I've gotten letters basically saying, I'm moving in with
Speaker 2: my boyfriend to this house that he owns. He wants
Speaker 2: me to pay rent? Is that fair? Right? And the
Speaker 2: rent could be going to build equity for your boyfriend.
Speaker 1: You're not married.
Speaker 2: He owns that house, You don't own that house, So
Speaker 2: it gets real fast.
Speaker 1: What do you think it depends?
Speaker 2: I think it depends on how much rent?
Speaker 1: Right?
Speaker 2: Is it fair for you to pay money to live someplace? Absolutely?
Speaker 1: Now, if he's renting, it's fine, I believe it's okay. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I got it. Maybe, But if you own the home,
Speaker 1: that's if he owns the.
Speaker 2: Home, yeah, I think maybe. I think you know, you've
Speaker 2: got to figure some way to.
Speaker 1: Contribute, right for sure. Now as far as just women
Speaker 1: in general, right, like, what can they do. Let's say
Speaker 1: they've been in a long marriage and when they got married,
Speaker 1: they got married young. And maybe I'm just being gender
Speaker 1: specific right now, but it could obviously work the other way.
Speaker 1: As well, but the man was supporting the relationship and
Speaker 1: then they decide to separate. I mean, how important is
Speaker 1: it for people, not just women, to be financial literate.
Speaker 2: It's incredibly important and it's really Look, you have to
Speaker 2: come out of a relationship with a sense of what
Speaker 2: are you earning? What do you own at this point?
Speaker 2: Like what did you what assets did you come away with?
Speaker 2: Do you have a house, do you have a retirement account,
Speaker 2: do you have cash in the bank, and what do
Speaker 2: you owe? What are your debts, what are your obligations
Speaker 2: going forward? And from there you can set up a
Speaker 2: budget that is sustainable. You can you can look at
Speaker 2: your roadmap and you can say, all right, here are
Speaker 2: the things that I have to do going forward. And
Speaker 2: if you don't know how to do those things, it
Speaker 2: gets really complicated. I think that many people need the
Speaker 2: help of a financial advisor coming out of a divorce
Speaker 2: to just get them on the right track. Make sure
Speaker 2: sure that they do. You're sort of doing a level
Speaker 2: set right, you still have goals. When I got divorced,
Speaker 2: I had a job, right, I had some assets. I
Speaker 2: bought a house, not the house that I lived in
Speaker 2: with my ex husband, but I bought a new house,
Speaker 2: but I had responsibilities. I was paying for half of college,
Speaker 2: which was going to hit us about ten years down
Speaker 2: the road. I was. I had taken a big step
Speaker 2: back when it came to retirement, and I had to
Speaker 2: make sure that I was going to catch up so
Speaker 2: that I could so that I could have choices when
Speaker 2: it came to retiring when I wanted how I wanted.
Speaker 2: I had this new house that I not only bought
Speaker 2: but then put a lot of money into to renovate
Speaker 2: because I wanted it to be what I wanted it
Speaker 2: to be, and I wanted to pay that house off
Speaker 2: before I got to retirement. So I had these goals
Speaker 2: and I had to make sure that I was on
Speaker 2: a path to meet those goals. That's what a plan does.
Speaker 1: That's like, so how do you budget for people that
Speaker 1: may not know it's overwhelming? You know it is.
Speaker 2: It's overwhelming. You look at my favorite way to budget,
Speaker 2: and I have a budgeting coaching class called Finance Fix. Yeah,
Speaker 2: and we get it online. We spell fix with two x's,
Speaker 2: and we get a ton of women who are just
Speaker 2: going through a divorce or thinking about a divorce because
Speaker 2: they want to understand this very very question, So I
Speaker 2: budget backwards because I don't. I think that's the best
Speaker 2: way to do it. We use technology to help you
Speaker 2: look at where your money is going today, what are
Speaker 2: you spending on in a whole bunch of different categories.
Speaker 2: And once you see where your money is going right now,
Speaker 2: then you can start making changes about where you want
Speaker 2: your money to go in order to spend a little less,
Speaker 2: save a little more, pay down some debts. So always,
Speaker 2: always we see people who are discovering a hopic a
Speaker 2: ha moment that they are spending too much on food.
Speaker 2: Food is just you know, it's eating out, it take
Speaker 2: its Yeah, it's exactly.
Speaker 1: It's that retail therapy kills me every time. Yeah, that's help.
Speaker 2: No, it does help. We can talk about that. It
Speaker 2: helps a little.
Speaker 1: It's another numbing device. Yes, that's a whole other episode.
Speaker 1: It is.
Speaker 2: It is so you know, we we look at the
Speaker 2: Postmates bill and we say, do you think do you
Speaker 2: think maybe you could.
Speaker 1: Go to Starbucks instead of didn't? I think it delivered.
Speaker 1: I'm just speaking from personal experience.
Speaker 2: There you go that and how much and that would
Speaker 2: say fifty percent right there?
Speaker 1: Absolutely. Yeah.
Speaker 2: So these are the kinds of changes that we.
Speaker 1: That we make along the way. Got it? Now do
Speaker 1: you believe couples should have I would say married or
Speaker 1: even serious It is not to be married, but joint accounts.
Speaker 2: I'm a fan of joint and separate, So I think
Speaker 2: it's easier and a little more romantic to have like
Speaker 2: something joined. I don't want to be out in a
Speaker 2: restaurant and worried about who's going to put their credit
Speaker 2: card down, right, I just I kind of hate that.
Speaker 2: So let's have a joint credit card so that we
Speaker 2: just pay for dinner on that, but then we fund
Speaker 2: a joint bank account with the money that we need
Speaker 2: to pay for the household expenses, and whatever's left is
Speaker 2: mine or my husband's. I put more into the joint
Speaker 2: account than he does because I make more than he does.
Speaker 1: I was just gonna ask that, like, is that how like?
Speaker 1: Is that something that you resent though later down the
Speaker 1: road or No?
Speaker 2: I don't. I'm fine with it, I think, but that's
Speaker 2: something you have to look at if you're gonna if
Speaker 2: you're gonna resent it, then you shouldn't do it. You
Speaker 2: should come up with the system that you're not going
Speaker 2: to resent, or you.
Speaker 1: Match the person who makes the most money matches whatever
Speaker 1: your partner puts in that month or whatever exactly.
Speaker 2: So I think it works. You know, we talk about
Speaker 2: fair and equal. I think it's fairst if you put
Speaker 2: in an amount of money that by percentages, like whatever
Speaker 2: percentage you earn more than him, you put that much
Speaker 2: more into the joint account. But it gets complicated. Let's
Speaker 2: say you've got a couple where one parent is staying
Speaker 2: home with kids. They may not be earning money outside
Speaker 2: the house, but they get to have their own money too,
Speaker 2: and that has to get funded out of the account
Speaker 2: of the stuffs that does earn money, right, because everybody
Speaker 2: needs autonomy. You know, I don't want to answer for
Speaker 2: my retail therapy. I you know, I don't. I don't
Speaker 2: want to. I I go out and I buy a bag.
Speaker 1: I don't have to ask, like you're a kid, like yeah, no,
Speaker 1: too parental, And that's when resentment I think built. It's
Speaker 1: just that this is why communication is vital, right, Like
Speaker 1: it always goes back to this, like the transparency, at
Speaker 1: least for me. I just feel like, you know, when
Speaker 1: I was married, there was just that piece that was
Speaker 1: like a very important piece, but it was like depending
Speaker 1: on the way you were raised, How were your parents
Speaker 1: with their money, Like, what did they show you? How
Speaker 1: did they deal with their money? Did they invest or
Speaker 1: were they not? Like you know, and it's it really
Speaker 1: it's generational too, and there's so much there's emotion, but
Speaker 1: then it's hard to separate. Like I come from my mother,
Speaker 1: who is a very uh she was She grew up
Speaker 1: in poverty in the Philippines, and then she divorced my
Speaker 1: father when I was two and she made a freaking
Speaker 1: like empire, like completely devoted her life to her business.
Speaker 1: Now with that, because I was she was a single
Speaker 1: parent raising me. She was able to put food on
Speaker 1: the table, she was able to support my dancing career.
Speaker 1: She was able to do so much, and I'm so
Speaker 1: grateful for that. But then that also required her being
Speaker 1: at her company all hours of the day and night,
Speaker 1: and then me being raised by you know, babysitters, which
Speaker 1: wasn't always a great experience. Now, look, I wouldn't be
Speaker 1: here today if it wasn't for her support. But like,
Speaker 1: I am definitely raised by somebody who's very good with
Speaker 1: her money and went from rags to riches. Now, you know,
Speaker 1: it could be the opposite with a partner, you know,
Speaker 1: and you kind of have to have that aha moment
Speaker 1: or that person does in order to be able to
Speaker 1: talk about it. It's like a whole thing.
Speaker 2: It's a whole thing, and it's been We call it
Speaker 2: your money story. This is your money story. It is
Speaker 2: it's multi many chapters, it's a big book. It's Harry Potter, right,
Speaker 2: and we we have to understand our own money story,
Speaker 2: which we often don't, and we have to understand our
Speaker 2: partner's money story in order to sort of get the
Speaker 2: friction out of the relationship and understand, you know, what
Speaker 2: you're dealing with in your money story. And you get this,
Speaker 2: you just you you seem to innately understand this, but
Speaker 2: it's it's not what you were taught. It's what you felt.
Speaker 2: It's it's the whispers that you heard and the tension
Speaker 2: in the house. And I am sure that when you're mom.
Speaker 1: Saving picking up pennies on the sidewalk, like.
Speaker 2: Come on right, well, and she probably continued to do
Speaker 2: that when when she made a fortune, made a boatload, right,
Speaker 2: and that that impacted you because you probably felt as
Speaker 2: if you had no money when in reality you had
Speaker 2: a ton.
Speaker 1: My sister was impact like she definitely is more like
Speaker 1: a penny pincher. I am the I went the complete opposite. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but I'm still I'm still aware of it, but I
Speaker 1: went to complete I'm like, you know, what, what are
Speaker 1: we gonna do at We're gonna get you know, we're
Speaker 1: all gonna die, and people are not going to talk
Speaker 1: hopefully about how much money you've made, Like you know,
Speaker 1: it's just we live this life now, in this present moment,
Speaker 1: and when you're so like, but that's just the way
Speaker 1: she was raised, and I have to respect that, you.
Speaker 2: Know, yeah, yeah, but you add a partner to it
Speaker 2: and all of a sudden, oh, it's explosive.
Speaker 1: Explosive many therapy sessions. But so why do you believe
Speaker 1: it's so much easier to talk about sex so openly,
Speaker 1: yet when it comes to money, it's like a uh no, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: we don't go there.
Speaker 2: I think because we had the sixties. I like, the
Speaker 2: sixties was like all about talking about sex, right, so
Speaker 2: our parents in the sixties learned to talk about sex,
Speaker 2: and hopefully they talked like my I you know, they
Speaker 2: they were more free around sex than money, and why not?
Speaker 1: I wish they mine was, But she's also Filipino, so
Speaker 1: like that, very Catholic.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so I think I think we went through the
Speaker 2: whole birth control and the pill and the you know,
Speaker 2: burn your bra.
Speaker 1: And wait, why what's that?
Speaker 2: Well, you know in the sixties people women were burning
Speaker 2: their bras nobody. Yeah, yes, why I mean because they
Speaker 2: didn't want to wear them.
Speaker 1: Oh just don't, no need to burn them, just don't.
Speaker 2: Wear them, right, So there you go. But they were
Speaker 2: making a statement and we didn't really have that with money.
Speaker 2: I mean, what's changing, is what I mean. It's interesting.
Speaker 2: So my kids are much more willing and able to
Speaker 2: talk about money with their friends than I ever was
Speaker 2: at their age. They're in their late twenties early thirties,
Speaker 2: and they they know how much their friends make.
Speaker 1: They talk about things.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and a lot of gen Z sort of very
Speaker 2: young millennials are right there, which I think is great.
Speaker 1: I think that's great. But you also raised you obviously
Speaker 1: raised them well because.
Speaker 2: You know, I have one spender and one saver. Really interesting,
Speaker 2: interesting like me and my sister. Yeah, yeah, interesting. I
Speaker 2: think it's like a rebel thing. It's kind of like,
Speaker 2: I don't know if I want to live like that,
Speaker 2: Like so.
Speaker 1: Tight, Like it's just really but then I see the
Speaker 1: other side too, you know, so interesting, this is so helpful.
Speaker 1: What are the first steps to educating yourself on whether
Speaker 1: you put money into a retirement versus stocks and bonds? Like,
Speaker 1: how do you suggest somebody does this.
Speaker 2: So they're not in either or a retirement or stocks
Speaker 2: and bonds? But can we just let's just sort of
Speaker 2: take a step back. I think that when it comes
Speaker 2: down to it, money is a series of habits that
Speaker 2: you repeat over and over and over again. And we're
Speaker 2: really lucky that we have technology that can help us
Speaker 2: start to participate in things like investing before we know
Speaker 2: everything there is to know and before we have all
Speaker 2: the answers. My five thing, five habits, five things you
Speaker 2: have to do in order to live a good thing
Speaker 2: to life. You have to earn a decent living, right,
Speaker 2: what's that mean? Decent is comfortable? You have to earn
Speaker 2: a comfortable living. We know that having you know, huge
Speaker 2: amounts of money, much more money than you need to
Speaker 2: pay for your life to go on vacation every once
Speaker 2: in a while, to put a roof over your head.
Speaker 2: The happiness is really just incremental. It's not going to
Speaker 2: buy you much more happiness. So you have to earn
Speaker 2: enough to maintain that comfortable lifestyle right enough to not worry.
Speaker 2: It's a good way to put it.
Speaker 1: Food shelter, Yeah, than necessities.
Speaker 2: You have to spend less than you make. That's the
Speaker 2: second one, and that's where a lot of people get stuck.
Speaker 2: And if you get stuck there, you can't do any
Speaker 2: of the others.
Speaker 1: Correct because you don't want to have debt.
Speaker 2: It's like this, people, Well, debt is a thing too,
Speaker 2: and I'm not really talking about a mortgage or a
Speaker 2: car loan. I'm talking about credit card debt. Debt is
Speaker 2: the thing that makes us the most unhappy. It's the
Speaker 2: thing that stresses us out the most. So, yes, we
Speaker 2: don't want debt.
Speaker 1: But also the worry. Like some people, it's a belief system, right,
Speaker 1: It's like that constant worry, you almost manifest it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, there are some people who believe in having debt.
Speaker 2: You know that you should bar Yeah, there are some
Speaker 2: people who believe that leverage is good. And no, I
Speaker 2: don't believe that. I believe in I believe that there
Speaker 2: is good debt and bad debt, you know, like a
Speaker 2: mortgage or a student loan or investment car that gets
Speaker 2: us yes, yes, but but credit card debt.
Speaker 1: No, no. And I don't think a car is a
Speaker 1: good investment unless if it's like an old antique car
Speaker 1: that you can go like and sell eventually.
Speaker 2: Well, you need to get back and forth to work, right,
Speaker 2: So if you lease it, you you you could lease
Speaker 2: it the best way that the best way to own
Speaker 2: a car is to buy a car used and drive
Speaker 2: it into the ground.
Speaker 1: Oh okay, got it.
Speaker 2: Okay, So if you're you know, maybe you want to
Speaker 2: be the most cost effective, if you have to have
Speaker 2: a new car, or you know you're going to get
Speaker 2: a new car every three years, then you should lease.
Speaker 1: That's what I do. That's what my mom taught me.
Speaker 1: At least then you should lease.
Speaker 2: And your mom ran it through her business, by the way,
Speaker 2: and you may be running it through your business. So
Speaker 2: so there.
Speaker 1: You go, great, love it.
Speaker 2: The third thing is you have to take the money
Speaker 2: that you're not spending and invest it so that it
Speaker 2: is growing for you.
Speaker 1: Right.
Speaker 2: You have to save some for emergencies and then you
Speaker 2: have to invest the rest. And we can talk about
Speaker 2: that in terms of what goes in a retirement account
Speaker 2: and what doesn't. There's a percentage right, there's there are
Speaker 2: caps on what you can put in your retirement account.
Speaker 2: But you that's that's the third thing you have to do.
Speaker 2: The fourth thing you have to do is protect this
Speaker 2: whole world, which means having insurance right and having a
Speaker 2: basic estate plan, a will right, and a power of
Speaker 2: attorney so that somebody could handle your money right. And
Speaker 2: then my fit thing is you got to find some
Speaker 2: way to give back because that is a happiness booster.
Speaker 2: So when it comes to investing your money, we invest
Speaker 2: the next dollar based on where we get the biggest
Speaker 2: bang for the buck. So if you are if you
Speaker 2: are working for a company that has a retirement plan
Speaker 2: like a four to oh one K, and you get
Speaker 2: matching dollars, then you want to put money in that
Speaker 2: four oh one K first because those matching dollars are
Speaker 2: like free money. Once you've done that, you look at
Speaker 2: other accounts with tax advantages, like iras and health savings
Speaker 2: accounts and college savings accounts, and once you've satisfied those,
Speaker 2: then you look at just plainal brokerage accounts. But these
Speaker 2: are all just buckets, and into those buckets you put investments.
Speaker 2: You buy stocks, and bonds, and they live in those
Speaker 2: buckets stocks and other mutual funds. Yep. Money markets are.
Speaker 2: Money markets are a type of mutual.
Speaker 1: Fund safer maybe than stocks and bonds. They're safer, especially
Speaker 1: if you're not dealing with a lot of money, right, Like,
Speaker 1: if you're not dealing with tons of money, that you
Speaker 1: can just gamble, because it's a gamble if you're doing stocks.
Speaker 2: Is not really so if we look historically at at
Speaker 2: the returns of the stock market, they since the since
Speaker 2: the Dow was invented, since the inception of the Dow, yeah,
Speaker 2: and since the S and P five hundred was invented,
Speaker 2: they've returned about eight or nine percent every single year
Speaker 2: on average.
Speaker 1: Okay, and it's been pretty consistent.
Speaker 2: Well it's been like this, not so consistent. But what
Speaker 2: that means is that if you've got a long time
Speaker 2: to invest your money, ten plus years, you put your
Speaker 2: money in a diversified S and P five hundred fund
Speaker 2: or a diversified total stock market fund, and you just
Speaker 2: keep adding to it. Every time you get paid, you
Speaker 2: buy more. And even though the market goes like this,
Speaker 2: over time, the market goes up. Right, So even though
Speaker 2: you have some ups and downs in the middle, the
Speaker 2: historical trend is going to be up, and that's how
Speaker 2: your money compounds, and that's how it makes more money
Speaker 2: for you. And when you are younger and you have
Speaker 2: more time until you need to use the money, then
Speaker 2: you put more of it in stocks. And when you're
Speaker 2: older and you have less time until you need to
Speaker 2: use the money, you put more of it in safer
Speaker 2: places like bonds and like money markets. If you have
Speaker 2: other goals, shorter term goals, things you need to get to,
Speaker 2: Like you want to buy a house, and you want
Speaker 2: to buy a house in five years, you don't put
Speaker 2: your down payment in stocks. You put your down payment
Speaker 2: money market.
Speaker 1: Right, yes, yes, yeah, that's what I'm currently doing. There
Speaker 1: you go, you buying a house. Well, yeah, I live
Speaker 1: in California, you know, so it's like right now, it's
Speaker 1: just not the best time, but it will be.
Speaker 2: Sorry, are you okay?
Speaker 1: I am, because I don't live in the LA I
Speaker 1: do live like a couple hours away from LA So
Speaker 1: I'm fine. But man, I used to I had a
Speaker 1: home that I owned in the Hollywood Hills for sixteen
Speaker 1: years and they all got it back. I mean, it's
Speaker 1: it's just horrible. But thank you for asking. I'm okay, sure,
Speaker 1: but that has changed the real state. I was actually
Speaker 1: looking for homes in Pacific Palisades that week that it
Speaker 1: all happened, So yeah, it's devastating, awful. Last question before
Speaker 1: I let you go here, how much money do you
Speaker 1: believe a single woman should have in her savings account?
Speaker 1: I guess at a given time, whether it maybe in
Speaker 1: her forties or thirties.
Speaker 2: So you said saving account, savings accounts, so not in
Speaker 2: her investments, in your cash account, your emergency account. I
Speaker 2: think single people should have six months worth of fixed
Speaker 2: expenses in an emergency account. If you're if you're part
Speaker 2: of a couple, it can be a little less. It
Speaker 2: can be three months. And that's because if one person
Speaker 2: loses their job, they have the other person's income to.
Speaker 1: Fall back on. Got it. And as far as hiring
Speaker 1: business managers finance advisors, what is your suggestion?
Speaker 2: Trust? But verify is my recommendation, right, So get recommendations
Speaker 2: from people that you know who use these people. On
Speaker 2: top of it, state, yes, do not take your eyes
Speaker 2: off the ball. Look, you have to look at all
Speaker 2: the statements, even if you've got somebody managing it. For you,
Speaker 2: but but make sure that you interview several people, make
Speaker 2: sure their credentials are up to date, make sure you
Speaker 2: check references when you talk to them. Make sure that
Speaker 2: you're in line with what they think you should be
Speaker 2: doing with your money and what you think you should
Speaker 2: be doing with your money.
Speaker 1: Important. Yeah, you don't want to go in there like
Speaker 1: not educated about your finances, because that's when people start
Speaker 1: to take advantage of you.
Speaker 2: Right, And if you feel like I just can't talk
Speaker 2: to this person, then just leave, you know, run in
Speaker 2: the other direction, because they're not They could be a
Speaker 2: great advisor, they could be brilliant financially, but they're not
Speaker 2: brilliant for you because you're not going to be able
Speaker 2: to communicate with them.
Speaker 1: Because I mean it is emotional a little bit, right
Speaker 1: there is that huge You could be great with numbers,
Speaker 1: but if I can't speak to you and you're not
Speaker 1: speaking the same language, because that's also a thing that
Speaker 1: I've run into, is that you're speaking like a completely
Speaker 1: different langue. But you're gonna have to bring it down
Speaker 1: to like maybe an eighth grader, or.
Speaker 2: Just explain it to me in English rural, right, just
Speaker 2: explain it to me and if they can't do that,
Speaker 2: I'm not working with them.
Speaker 1: Or if they get impatient, done like done done.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's like lawyers too, same thing. I'm like, you
Speaker 1: got your speaking Shakespeare like I can't understand you. But yeah,
Speaker 1: communication is key in every relationship. Thank you so much.
Speaker 1: This was so helpful. Where can people find your online
Speaker 1: course because I would love to take it?
Speaker 2: Oh well, we would love to have you.
Speaker 1: Thank you.
Speaker 2: You can find our budgeting course at financefix dot com
Speaker 2: with two x's and our investing club for women and
Speaker 2: you should come, Cheryl, because we near buying individual stocks.
Speaker 2: We're like learning about the market. It's every other Monday
Speaker 2: night on zoom. I teach it with Karen Feinerman from
Speaker 2: CNBC and you can find that an Investingfix dot com.
Speaker 1: Again to I'll seriously look into it because I would
Speaker 1: love to just you know, it's never too late to
Speaker 1: get more of a grip. I do have a grip,
Speaker 1: but I would like to have more of a group.
Speaker 2: Yeah, we've got five hundred women investing together.
Speaker 1: Oh wow. And then is it just online like you
Speaker 1: can take it out your own time or if.
Speaker 2: We tape all the classes, but we do do them
Speaker 2: live every Monday at eight pm. Every other Monday, eight
Speaker 2: pm on the East Coast.
Speaker 1: All right, cool, I'll look into it for sure. Thank
Speaker 1: you again, thank you bye. Thanks to Jane for joining
Speaker 1: me today. And I just love talking about money because
Speaker 1: it's just so uncomfortable. But single women out there really
Speaker 1: do need this information and you're never it's never enough,
Speaker 1: you know, you always want to be educated for sure
Speaker 1: when it comes to your finances. Are you divorced or
Speaker 1: newly single? Maybe you need advice on how to navigate
Speaker 1: this next chapter in your life. Call us or email us,
Speaker 1: follow us on socials. All the information will be in
Speaker 1: the show notes, so make sure to rate and review
Speaker 1: the podcast I Do Part two and iHeartRadio podcast where
Speaker 1: falling in love is the main objective.