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Speaker 1: We are very down to earth people. I get my

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Speaker 1: underwear from Target, just like any of you, just white

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Speaker 1: knuckling through life. Babes.

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Speaker 2: Welcome to More and Better with Stephanie Melissa, a podcast

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Speaker 2: where we stop pretending to have it all together and

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Speaker 2: embrace the journey of becoming a little more better every.

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Speaker 1: Day and start being real. No, that's the real world,

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Speaker 1: the MTV show that we all watched, remember Puck. That's

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Speaker 1: Mossa from Marrow, and that's Stephanie Beatrice. We're your hosts

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Speaker 1: with us ride into hell or wherever it takes us.

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Speaker 1: I'm not sure what's going to happen. I don't know

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Speaker 1: what am I out? Better or.

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Speaker 2: More?

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Speaker 1: Yay, Welcome to the show that I just blow out

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Speaker 1: the speakers and you're Honda Civic.

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Speaker 2: Get gready, baby, this is a.

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Speaker 1: Wild you on.

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Speaker 2: We're doing it.

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Speaker 1: The thing is, well, so we know each other from

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Speaker 1: thousands of years ago, when we were on a little

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Speaker 1: show you may have watched called Brooklyn nine nine nine nine.

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Speaker 1: We wanted to do this podcast because we found in

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Speaker 1: our friendship discussions a lot of time we were evolving.

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Speaker 1: I wanted to say.

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Speaker 2: Devolving, but that's not right.

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Speaker 1: Our time, our conversations to devolve, but they were evolving

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Speaker 1: into each of us asking for advice on different things

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Speaker 1: in our lives that we just didn't feel like we

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Speaker 1: were really handling. Well.

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Speaker 2: Yes, lots of dressing room talks, lots of checking in

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Speaker 2: with each other, and I think just a little discovery

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Speaker 2: of like, oh, we're two people that are always a

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Speaker 2: little bit scattered, but always trying like working on ourselves

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Speaker 2: a lite and like trying to just be better.

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Speaker 1: Just like a little bit, like a little bit. But

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Speaker 1: we also don't have time to be trying to like

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Speaker 1: take a potterty class and stuff. We're very busy, as

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Speaker 1: many of our friends are busy if they have a

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Speaker 1: job or trying to get healthcare, have people in their

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Speaker 1: lives they have to take care of, have to eat,

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Speaker 1: have to show up for people, you know what I mean, take.

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Speaker 2: Care of people, So take care of little people.

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Speaker 1: And that's where we kind of came up with this

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Speaker 1: idea of like, well, if we're doing it, and if

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Speaker 1: most of our friendships are also us doing that with

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Speaker 1: other friends, then why don't we do it in kind

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Speaker 1: of a community forum so that we can all get

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Speaker 1: a little bit more better together. Because on top of

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Speaker 1: everything else on top of this, like wanting to go

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Speaker 1: on this you know, eat pray love moment. I can't

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Speaker 1: eat pray love. I don't have time to eat pray love.

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Speaker 1: I have to like eat pray love for my family.

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Speaker 2: That's literally all I thought about when I read that

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Speaker 2: book was like, who.

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Speaker 1: Had the time? Nobody has the time. Nobody has the

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Speaker 1: time to do that. I can barely get out of

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Speaker 1: my house in the morning, like as a whole person.

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Speaker 1: So like, essentially, we wanted to do this conversation so

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Speaker 1: that you guys can have a space where you feel

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Speaker 1: like you listen to your friends talk and then walk

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Speaker 1: away and feel like maybe maybe just a little bit,

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Speaker 1: you feel like a little bit more better of a person.

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Speaker 2: Yeah maybe, And if you don't, maybe go backt a

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Speaker 2: couple times during this podcast.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, you know what, And if that's all that happened,

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Speaker 1: then that's pretty good.

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Speaker 2: That's pretty good. We'll take it. Yeah, would you? Why

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Speaker 2: don't you do for those people? Sorry I started doing.

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Speaker 1: That's how she is in real life, though, just I

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Speaker 1: just want you to know that's how she is. She

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Speaker 1: just like reboots herself sometimes so much.

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Speaker 2: There may be people listening that don't know us and

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Speaker 2: the show and so oh, well, then how did you.

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Speaker 1: Come aboard on the crazy train?

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Speaker 2: I don't know from crazy train of life? Were your

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Speaker 2: friends stuff?

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Speaker 1: I'm from Texas. I was born in Argentina. My parents

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Speaker 1: are Colombian and Bolivian. Shout out to the immigrant community,

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Speaker 1: what about you?

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Speaker 2: I am from New Jersey, Oh, first generation daughter of immigrants.

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Speaker 2: Beautiful refugees. I guess is the more proper correct more better? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: There better Cubans. By the way, we know this about

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Speaker 1: each other. We're just doing this like we're on a

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Speaker 1: first date for you, because you're some of you are

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Speaker 1: on a first date with us right now.

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Speaker 2: So it's a little bit about who we are. And

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Speaker 2: we're both actors. And we met on a show m hm,

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Speaker 2: and we said the rest.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that's good. How are you doing? Are you fully

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Speaker 1: caffeinated getting there? Yeah? Wells drinks a lot of coffee.

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Speaker 1: She's Cuban. She drinks a lot of coffee.

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Speaker 2: So much coffee it never keeps me up at night.

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Speaker 2: When I was pregnant for the first time, it was

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Speaker 2: literally the first thing I asked my doctor was how

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Speaker 2: much coffee can I safely drink during this I don't

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Speaker 2: care about anything.

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Speaker 1: I don't care what you say.

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Speaker 2: What does that want? I'm pretty sure, my buddy, you

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Speaker 2: know what?

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Speaker 1: And it was, Yeah, it was. So the first big

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Speaker 1: thing that we wanted to talk about was listening to

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Speaker 1: yourself because it's it's it's hard. It's very hard, hard

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Speaker 1: to do, hard to do. We're each going to talk

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Speaker 1: about when we've succeeded or failed. God, it's so hard,

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Speaker 1: isn't it just you just, for some reason just don't

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Speaker 1: want to do it.

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Speaker 2: No, you hear the voice in your head and you go,

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Speaker 2: I'm not gonna listen to you.

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Speaker 1: You're smart, No, you're not. It's been a dreamy of

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Speaker 1: trying to figure out how to do that really hard

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Speaker 1: when you women as artists, like it's very very difficult

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Speaker 1: because there's a lot of things in your life that

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Speaker 1: are telling you, like, don't listen to your intuition, honey,

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Speaker 1: don't worry about that part of yourself.

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Speaker 2: We just need you to do this.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, just ignore that red flag, baby. So yeah, I've

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Speaker 1: been thinking a lot about that lately. Other than that,

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Speaker 1: I'm like, you know, just white knuckling through life, babes,

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Speaker 1: just white knuckling it. I'm on a new antidepressant. It's

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Speaker 1: working great. This is day four. See how how that

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Speaker 1: all goes.

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Speaker 2: That's a little bit of more better.

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Speaker 1: Pray for me, everybody. Okay, for you.

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Speaker 2: For doing it, doing the things. So Steph, can you

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Speaker 2: remember the very first time or a time in your

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Speaker 2: life when you listened to yourself or didn't listen to

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Speaker 2: yourself in like a major way. Did I just like

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Speaker 2: cause anxiety in your body?

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Speaker 1: Find everything went straight butt clunched, there was I'm not

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Speaker 1: gonna name names, so don't ask me to, but I

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Speaker 1: will absolutely tell you who it is after the episode. No,

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Speaker 1: I'm just kidding. I won't. No, I will. So I

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Speaker 1: used to do a lot of theater. Yes, I did

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Speaker 1: a lot of theater before I moved to LA and

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Speaker 1: LA and I did a production that was a really

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Speaker 1: big Shakespeare production. And I had never done Shakespeare before.

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Speaker 1: I had sort of always wanted to, but I didn't

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Speaker 1: really feel like Shakespeare was for me. It was hoity toity.

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Speaker 1: But the good Shakespeare I had seen was electric, phenomenal, alive.

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Speaker 1: The language felt so like seeing real and like everything

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Speaker 1: just felt like what. So I really wanted to do

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Speaker 1: Shakespeare and I got a really really small part in

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Speaker 1: this very big production. And in the play.

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Speaker 2: What was the play?

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Speaker 1: I can't tell you because Okay, there's a lot of

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Speaker 1: like fisticuffs and like grabbing of people in these shake

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Speaker 1: isn't it great? I threw it in there for you,

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Speaker 1: And there was We were in rehearsal in this big

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Speaker 1: rehearsal hall, and like these are huge plays, right, Shakespeare

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Speaker 1: would write these plays for like there's a ton of

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Speaker 1: people in them, so that all the actors are sitting

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Speaker 1: around the rehearsal hall, the director's directing, the leads are leading,

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Speaker 1: you know, I'm like deep background. Basically, I'm like just

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Speaker 1: like literally holding a lantern or a spear or whatever.

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Speaker 1: And there was this part where in the fisticuffs, I

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Speaker 1: was like down on the ground and someone had to

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Speaker 1: pull me up to standing, and then I had to

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Speaker 1: pretend to run away and they had to grab me

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Speaker 1: and pull me back. Now it just so happened that

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Speaker 1: the person that had to grab me and pull me

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Speaker 1: back was also the mean that I was dating at

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Speaker 1: the time. Okay, Okay, so we're in rehearsal and I'm

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Speaker 1: acting my balls off because I'm like I'm just spear

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Speaker 1: carrier number three. I want to be in a big

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Speaker 1: show some day, so I'm just giving it everything. I'm

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Speaker 1: like me, yes, I'm like crying, weeping, yeah, just like

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Speaker 1: doing the whole thing. I'm like, I mean, there wasn't

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Speaker 1: any snock because it would not have been character appropriate.

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Speaker 1: But I was like desolate on the ground, a maiden

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Speaker 1: in despair. Yeah, And so he pulls me up off

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Speaker 1: the ground and my arm is like that didn't feel

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Speaker 1: so great. And we had had like lessons on how.

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Speaker 2: To write, how to do shit properly and safely.

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Speaker 1: And then I start to run, like I take the

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Speaker 1: exit right and I'm like running like I would really

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Speaker 1: run away from someone because he's supposed to let go.

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Speaker 1: And he held on so tight that my arm like

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Speaker 1: like I my body dripped back and like it was

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Speaker 1: like a big move, like and everyone is watching. Everyone's

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Speaker 1: watching the scene, right, and I hear people go like

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Speaker 1: and like it hurt. It hurt. And after the scene finished,

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Speaker 1: like the next scene was about to start, and I

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Speaker 1: like went over to the fight choreographer and I was like, hey,

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Speaker 1: he like kind of hurt me. And so the fight

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Speaker 1: choreographer grabs a lead and he's like hey, so how

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Speaker 1: can we figure this out? You know, there was an

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Speaker 1: accident that happened today. I think, like you guys need

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Speaker 1: He starts like directing him or whatever, and the lead

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Speaker 1: is like, well, she shouldn't have run.

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Speaker 2: What And I was like, oh, like I couldn't, no, sir.

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Speaker 1: But also like at the.

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Speaker 2: Time when you're a young actor and I did something

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Speaker 2: wrong star, so I felt like I.

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Speaker 1: Felt I really feels so stupid right now even telling it,

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Speaker 1: I was just like I was like, okay, yeah, he

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Speaker 1: was like I remember. He was like, well if she's

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Speaker 1: we're not this isn't real. So she's really gonna run,

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Speaker 1: then I have to hold on door or no that

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Speaker 1: he said something like he was like, if she's really

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Speaker 1: gonna run, I have to hold on door that tight.

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Speaker 1: And and the court fierraphone was like, I don't understand

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Speaker 1: what you're saying, because like fist to run, Yeah, that's

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Speaker 1: not what we so like then, you know, not only

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Speaker 1: is this like a work thing, because like I'm in

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Speaker 1: a work environment, everyone's like eavesdropping on the conversation. Also,

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Speaker 1: and like I look like the idiot because I'm just dad.

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Speaker 1: I'd have nothing to say. I've brought over the choreographer

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Speaker 1: and like mm hmm. And then so I took a

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Speaker 1: little bike ride after rehearsal, and I was like biking

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Speaker 1: and crying while I biked and like, you know, tears streaming.

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Speaker 1: And then I see my phone ring, my flip phone

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Speaker 1: at the time, so I pick it up. I pull

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Speaker 1: over and I pick it up and it's him. He

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Speaker 1: was like, what happened today? And I was like, I

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Speaker 1: started crying, and I was like, you know, I just

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Speaker 1: think it was like really wrong, but you did that,

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Speaker 1: and like he did it in front of everyone, and

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Speaker 1: I just felt really embarrassed and like and I was trying.

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Speaker 1: I was really trying to be like to stand up

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Speaker 1: for sign up for myself, and he took me out

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Speaker 1: of it. Yeah, and I was with that person for

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Speaker 1: eight years after that. I wish I could go back

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Speaker 1: in time and say to that girl, like, you do

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Speaker 1: not need this person's approval.

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Speaker 2: You know I need his.

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Speaker 1: You don't just because he's done more than you, just

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Speaker 1: because you think he's a better actor than you, just

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Speaker 1: because he's older than you, it doesn't make him better

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Speaker 1: than you. I wish I would have and I knew it.

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Speaker 1: I knew it in my heart. I knew it hard.

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Speaker 1: Like I was crying on that bike and I was like,

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Speaker 1: how could I be dating someone that would do something

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Speaker 1: like that to me? And he talked me out of it.

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Speaker 1: He talked me out of it. Yeah. I did really

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Speaker 1: learn from that, Like, yeah, there were a lot of

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Speaker 1: red flags, and it did take me eight years to

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Speaker 1: get there, but I got there.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: So like if you're listening to this and you're in

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Speaker 1: something right now and you're like, I just I gotta

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Speaker 1: just stay in it because it's going to get better

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Speaker 1: and like I've put so much time into already, and

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Speaker 1: if you are feeling those red flags, like just get

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Speaker 1: out now, like if you can, because those red flags

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Speaker 1: are not going away. They're just they're just going to

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Speaker 1: keep popping up. Okay, So now your turn.

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Speaker 2: Oh I did just think of one when I was younger.

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Speaker 2: I was in high school and I was a dancer

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Speaker 2: growing up. And it was my senior year of high

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Speaker 2: school and I had we had like senior prom or something,

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Speaker 2: but we also had some like big rehearsal or something

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Speaker 2: for recital or a show we were because we also

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Speaker 2: did like musicals. I don't remember what it was specifically,

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Speaker 2: but I was leaving something early, and it caused with

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Speaker 2: the director and her son, like a drama that I

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Speaker 2: was leaving early and to go do my other thing,

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Speaker 2: my personal thing. That was like a big, like high

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Speaker 2: school moment. And I even got ready at the dance

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Speaker 2: studio and made all my friends pick me up in

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Speaker 2: the party bus at my dance studio, like tried to

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Speaker 2: make every accommodation to like make everyone happy, and then

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Speaker 2: I didn't, and they kept me a little longer, and

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Speaker 2: I feel like there was a moment where I got

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Speaker 2: kind of annoyed, but I was being trying to be

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Speaker 2: quiet about it, but like obviously they clocked it. And

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Speaker 2: then I think it was the next day the sun

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Speaker 2: got in my face and like yelled at death about

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Speaker 2: it and I just yelled at he yelled at.

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Speaker 1: Me, Melissa Fumero, and I took it.

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Speaker 2: And I like was like, yeah, I shouldn't have done

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Speaker 2: that Toime, I shouldn't have.

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Speaker 1: You know, I cannot imagine you doing that. I cannot

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Speaker 1: imagine you're doing that. I just cannot imagine it.

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Speaker 2: Now I would, yeah you would, but h yeah, I

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Speaker 2: just I don't. I don't even remember what I said, Like,

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Speaker 2: you know, were you just you're you're so taken aback

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Speaker 2: and I and I just was. And then I had

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Speaker 2: I felt all the shame and all the guilt, and

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Speaker 2: I was like, yeah, I let everybody down. I I

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Speaker 2: fucked up everything for everyone, and I shouldn't have done

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Speaker 2: I should have just skipped it.

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Speaker 1: I should just skipped the.

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Speaker 2: Prom or like skipped the thing, and you know. But

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Speaker 2: then also like there's that part in your brain. I

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Speaker 2: also remember that like tug in my brain and be like, no,

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Speaker 2: you're still a person, You're still a kid. You still write.

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Speaker 2: And that's like the part that like I wasn't listening

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Speaker 2: to and it felt awful for the longest time until

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Speaker 2: years later, I remember looking back on that and being

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Speaker 2: like that was so messed up. The tug in your

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Speaker 2: brain a good way to put it, Like that little

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Speaker 2: voice in your head that's going, no, you didn't do

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Speaker 2: anything wrong. You're allowed to have things for yourself. You're

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Speaker 2: allowed to have these big kid moments like you know,

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Speaker 2: and I had the best time at that thing whatever.

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Speaker 2: I think it was senior problem. It was either senior

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Speaker 2: prom or like a weekend prom thing. I had the

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Speaker 2: best time, and like all these like core memories were made,

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Speaker 2: and I felt shame about it for the longest time

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Speaker 2: because I made them angry stupid, so stupid. But he

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Speaker 2: was just like stupid, like I was just like a teen.

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Speaker 2: And and then the way that like rocks your confidence

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Speaker 2: and you're insecure.

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Speaker 1: About sir, especially kind of person that wants to show

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Speaker 1: up for other people and like pride themselves on doing

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Speaker 1: a good job.

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Speaker 2: Yes, and I and I recognize that, like I have

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Speaker 2: a little bit of like a people pleaser kind of thing. Like,

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Speaker 2: you know, I think it's gotten healthier as I got older,

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Speaker 2: but like, yeah, I want to like like I think

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Speaker 2: I'm better now, like I want to make everyone happy,

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Speaker 2: but like also still protect my happiness. Or when I

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Speaker 2: was younger that was definitely like not as balanced, which

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Speaker 2: I think is probably true for a lot of people.

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Speaker 1: I think. You know, what's interesting is like when does

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Speaker 1: that happen? When does the shift happen? Right, Because like

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Speaker 1: I don't know, I cannot remember the shift happening. I

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Speaker 1: don't remember the shift happening, but I remember feeling like

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Speaker 1: this feels wrong, this feels like the tug. I remember

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Speaker 1: feeling the tug. Yeah, I think for me, it happened

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Speaker 1: in college.

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Speaker 2: I was like of my most confident in college, like

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Speaker 2: when we were first year of Brooklyn and I was

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Speaker 2: feeling my god, so scared that entire first season and

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Speaker 2: convinced I would get fired or fuck it up. At

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Speaker 2: a certain point when I realized, like this is going

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Speaker 2: well and I think I'm like doing okay at this Yeah,

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Speaker 2: And remember trying to remind myself like just try to

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Speaker 2: be that girl in college, like try it, Like where

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Speaker 2: did we lose her? And like how do we get

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Speaker 2: back to her? And I feel like it's been a

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Speaker 2: journey since then, like feeling more like her because I

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Speaker 2: was I think my first year of college I had

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Speaker 2: a credible acting teacher that like really believed in me.

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Speaker 1: You were like Toby Maguire and that Spider Man where

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Speaker 1: he's just like walking down the street giving everybody for yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: and not me. I was working and what's that what

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Speaker 1: is that movie called where they're all they all work

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Speaker 1: in the video store. Oh my gosh, not the video

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Speaker 1: record store. I was like eat an umbri. I was

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Speaker 1: like not has same hair, same outfit. I was not

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Speaker 1: doing my best in college. I guess like one of

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Speaker 1: the things that happened during Brooklyn was me getting more

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Speaker 1: confident and listening to myself because like first, and you

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Speaker 1: know this, first like four seasons, I was like, I

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Speaker 1: don't know what I'm doing. I don't know what I'm doing.

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Speaker 1: I don't know what I'm doing. I don't know what

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Speaker 1: I'm doing. And then by season seven and eight, it

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Speaker 1: was like, Oh, I know what I'm doing. I know

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Speaker 1: what i'm doing. I've blocked these hours, I've listened to

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Speaker 1: these jokes, I've read these scripts. I know these people's rhythms.

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Speaker 1: I know what I'm doing. I know where the cameras

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Speaker 1: are supposed to be, I know how something's shot. I

354
00:18:10,880 --> 00:18:13,800
Speaker 1: know what I'm doing. I don't have to feel stupid anymore.

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Speaker 1: And I think one of the things that comes from

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Speaker 1: being good at something is that you find your confidence

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Speaker 1: in it. Like that's why I think that's why we

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Speaker 1: as parents are trying to introduce our kids to a

359
00:18:25,200 --> 00:18:27,320
Speaker 1: lot of different stuff, because we're like, I don't know

360
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Speaker 1: what you're gonna like and what you're gonna feel like

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Speaker 1: is you, but I want you to feel like you

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Speaker 1: in the world. Yeah, And I think by the end

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Speaker 1: of Brooklyn not I would not say at the beginning,

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Speaker 1: but by the end of Brooklyn, I felt like me

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Speaker 1: in the world as an actor, as a person, and

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Speaker 1: I think for me that translated really a lot into

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Speaker 1: my everyday life, Like I just feel like more confident

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Speaker 1: as a person, even though I still have stuff that's

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Speaker 1: like antidepressance. But you know, like you know, I still

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Speaker 1: have stuff. I mean, I still have That's why we

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Speaker 1: started this podcast, because we have stuff.

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Speaker 2: It's so interesting to me though, because I remember in

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Speaker 2: the beginning, especially being like man, stuff is so confident.

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Speaker 2: So you know what I remember. I remember at the

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Speaker 2: Golden Globes, I felt like I was a mess. This conversation,

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Speaker 2: by the way, just got real, bougie.

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Speaker 1: We are very down to earth people. I get my

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Speaker 1: underwear from Target, just like any of you.

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Speaker 2: But we were at the Golden Globes and I was

380
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Speaker 2: not playing anything cool. I was very scattered, very like,

381
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Speaker 2: holy shit, I can't believe we're here. Holy shit, I

382
00:19:39,920 --> 00:19:43,720
Speaker 2: can't believe who's here. And and I remember, just like

383
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Speaker 2: my eyes keep going to you and being like, man,

384
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Speaker 2: stuff just looks so calm and like like she like

385
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Speaker 2: she deserves me.

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Speaker 1: You remember my plastic insert on my dress, my chicken

387
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Speaker 1: cutlet was like sliding down in my dress.

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Speaker 2: I got my red Carmel sauce.

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Speaker 1: I'm just like sliding down my gown.

390
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Speaker 2: Also, can I tell? Can I tell? Our super bonding

391
00:20:06,280 --> 00:20:08,600
Speaker 2: moment that night that I think like let us become

392
00:20:08,680 --> 00:20:12,600
Speaker 2: close friends was we went to the bathroom together because

393
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Speaker 2: we both realized at some point that we could not

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Speaker 2: get our dresses off alone, and so we were like,

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Speaker 2: I don't even remember who said it, but it was like,

396
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Speaker 2: maybe when we have to be we should go together.

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Speaker 2: And that's what we did. And we both went into

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Speaker 2: a stall and I took my dress completely off and

399
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Speaker 2: he held it up as I peed, and that I

400
00:20:30,280 --> 00:20:33,800
Speaker 2: was a heavy dress. It was so heavy in my shoulders.

401
00:20:34,960 --> 00:20:41,359
Speaker 2: When when we won, I immediately started crying and I

402
00:20:41,440 --> 00:20:44,760
Speaker 2: was like a hot mess, and you were so collected,

403
00:20:45,840 --> 00:20:47,920
Speaker 2: and I was like, how is she doing you?

404
00:20:48,200 --> 00:20:50,720
Speaker 1: How I did that? Yeah, because I was like all

405
00:20:51,320 --> 00:20:55,080
Speaker 1: all this is like it's just so fleeting, like but

406
00:20:55,080 --> 00:20:56,240
Speaker 1: that you could be that president.

407
00:20:56,359 --> 00:20:59,680
Speaker 2: Have that realization. Yeah, I was like in the stratosphere

408
00:20:59,720 --> 00:21:02,080
Speaker 2: of like freaking out an anxiety.

409
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Speaker 1: I just kept thinking like this might never happen again.

410
00:21:05,560 --> 00:21:08,119
Speaker 1: I might never ever go to this again. So like

411
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Speaker 1: I want to remember all of it because like, how

412
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Speaker 1: many times in your life do you get to go

413
00:21:12,280 --> 00:21:15,919
Speaker 1: to the Golden Globes. It was incredible. That's really funny

414
00:21:15,960 --> 00:21:18,320
Speaker 1: to think about that time because I feel for me

415
00:21:18,520 --> 00:21:20,680
Speaker 1: as your friend, like it feels like you've always been

416
00:21:20,720 --> 00:21:23,080
Speaker 1: a model of confidence to me, like and somebody who

417
00:21:23,119 --> 00:21:29,720
Speaker 1: really does like don't cry, don't cry, cry, cry cry.

418
00:21:30,359 --> 00:21:33,760
Speaker 1: I just really feel like you've always been like I

419
00:21:33,760 --> 00:21:37,359
Speaker 1: don't know, you were really especially on Brooklyn. You you

420
00:21:37,440 --> 00:21:41,000
Speaker 1: had had experience before on camera, and like you just

421
00:21:42,080 --> 00:21:44,840
Speaker 1: you just knew what you were. You were just like yeah, yeah,

422
00:21:44,920 --> 00:21:47,160
Speaker 1: like you were just doing it and you were like

423
00:21:47,960 --> 00:21:51,000
Speaker 1: you know, even sometimes with Dan Gore, our showrunner. I

424
00:21:51,080 --> 00:21:53,320
Speaker 1: was very afraid of Dan for a very long time,

425
00:21:53,400 --> 00:21:55,440
Speaker 1: way too long, Like you know, I was afraid of

426
00:21:55,480 --> 00:21:58,240
Speaker 1: Dan and the kids like are like believe in Santa,

427
00:21:58,320 --> 00:22:00,439
Speaker 1: like too long, Like I was afraid of Dan for

428
00:22:00,480 --> 00:22:03,440
Speaker 1: too long. But like you were not you were maybe

429
00:22:03,440 --> 00:22:06,280
Speaker 1: you were on the inside, but I think you you

430
00:22:06,440 --> 00:22:08,560
Speaker 1: were just like I want to try this, I want

431
00:22:08,600 --> 00:22:11,359
Speaker 1: to do this, and you were very like direct with

432
00:22:11,400 --> 00:22:14,560
Speaker 1: your opinions about stuff and like sometimes to the point

433
00:22:14,560 --> 00:22:17,840
Speaker 1: where you guys would spend a long time changing scenes

434
00:22:17,880 --> 00:22:20,320
Speaker 1: because you and Andy didn't feel like something was right,

435
00:22:20,359 --> 00:22:23,600
Speaker 1: and you would be like, oh, you were like the

436
00:22:23,680 --> 00:22:26,000
Speaker 1: Jake and Amy scene, yeah, and you were like really,

437
00:22:26,080 --> 00:22:28,479
Speaker 1: I mean again, like you were listening to yourself with

438
00:22:28,560 --> 00:22:31,359
Speaker 1: like you were internally like, I'm protective over this character

439
00:22:31,440 --> 00:22:34,800
Speaker 1: that I didn't create, but I helped build, you.

440
00:22:34,800 --> 00:22:37,520
Speaker 2: Know, like that stuff because I felt like the Jake

441
00:22:37,560 --> 00:22:39,639
Speaker 2: and Amy stuff because it felt like it was a

442
00:22:39,640 --> 00:22:41,520
Speaker 2: relationship and it was love and it was real that

443
00:22:41,600 --> 00:22:44,000
Speaker 2: I was like, oh, this I know how to do.

444
00:22:44,440 --> 00:22:48,560
Speaker 2: But then every time I had a joke line for

445
00:22:49,720 --> 00:22:52,520
Speaker 2: Joel truly will help us, I would I would be like, fuck,

446
00:22:52,600 --> 00:22:54,600
Speaker 2: it gave me a joke line. Oh no, I would

447
00:22:54,680 --> 00:22:56,520
Speaker 2: just I want to just set ups. I want to

448
00:22:56,560 --> 00:22:59,800
Speaker 2: just want to lob things to people. And every time

449
00:23:00,080 --> 00:23:03,040
Speaker 2: for jokes, oh my god, no, that gave me so

450
00:23:03,240 --> 00:23:07,400
Speaker 2: much anxiety. And and then I and then I would

451
00:23:07,480 --> 00:23:10,320
Speaker 2: just do them all different ways because I didn't know

452
00:23:10,359 --> 00:23:12,320
Speaker 2: what I was doing. And then later I learned, oh,

453
00:23:12,320 --> 00:23:16,399
Speaker 2: that's kind of the way you do comedy anyway, right, Yeah.

454
00:23:16,119 --> 00:23:17,600
Speaker 1: That is the way you do comedy. You just try

455
00:23:17,640 --> 00:23:18,600
Speaker 1: things until it sticks.

456
00:23:18,680 --> 00:23:21,800
Speaker 2: But it came for me of a place of I

457
00:23:21,840 --> 00:23:23,240
Speaker 2: don't know, Please don't fire me?

458
00:23:26,080 --> 00:23:33,119
Speaker 1: More better? Okay, so let's discuss let's digest. I wonder

459
00:23:33,240 --> 00:23:39,040
Speaker 1: if you feel like you learned anything from today's discussion class?

460
00:23:39,080 --> 00:23:42,359
Speaker 1: Did you? Did you? It's we're sort of in a class.

461
00:23:42,400 --> 00:23:43,240
Speaker 1: This is like a class.

462
00:23:43,280 --> 00:23:46,000
Speaker 2: You're thirty minute drive to work forum if you will?

463
00:23:46,400 --> 00:23:48,800
Speaker 1: Yeah, forum? Did you learn anything in the forum.

464
00:23:49,000 --> 00:23:51,679
Speaker 2: That I should always listen to myself? A plus?

465
00:23:51,720 --> 00:23:55,960
Speaker 1: You pass the class? Okay? Speaking of class, Like, what's

466
00:23:56,000 --> 00:23:59,679
Speaker 1: the best advice you've ever gotten about listening to yourself?

467
00:23:59,720 --> 00:24:00,720
Speaker 1: Like somebody else?

468
00:24:01,560 --> 00:24:05,200
Speaker 2: Oh, I don't know that I can think of any

469
00:24:05,240 --> 00:24:08,360
Speaker 2: good advice I've ever gotten from someone about listening to myself.

470
00:24:08,440 --> 00:24:11,040
Speaker 2: I feel like it's something I've just sort of stumbled

471
00:24:11,040 --> 00:24:15,680
Speaker 2: through in life and like learned that, like I should

472
00:24:16,160 --> 00:24:19,760
Speaker 2: not ignore my gut, I should not ignore my intuition

473
00:24:20,240 --> 00:24:23,920
Speaker 2: and you know those little feelings inside? How about you stuff?

474
00:24:24,119 --> 00:24:28,280
Speaker 1: I mean in terms of like like direct advice about

475
00:24:28,320 --> 00:24:30,920
Speaker 1: listening to myself that I have a work one which

476
00:24:30,960 --> 00:24:36,040
Speaker 1: is on Brooklyn. I remember being very very nervous to

477
00:24:36,119 --> 00:24:38,680
Speaker 1: try to improvise because I did not. I was like, ah,

478
00:24:38,880 --> 00:24:41,800
Speaker 1: I remember trying it once early on, and I was

479
00:24:41,840 --> 00:24:43,679
Speaker 1: like all sweaty and stuff. And I turned to Andy

480
00:24:43,720 --> 00:24:46,520
Speaker 1: Andy Sandberg, and I was like, oh, this makes me

481
00:24:46,560 --> 00:24:48,520
Speaker 1: so nervous. I hate doing it. He was like, Oh,

482
00:24:48,520 --> 00:24:50,120
Speaker 1: you just need to do it more. You just need

483
00:24:50,160 --> 00:24:53,280
Speaker 1: to do it more, try to improvise more.

484
00:24:54,000 --> 00:24:54,640
Speaker 2: And he was right.

485
00:24:54,800 --> 00:24:57,679
Speaker 1: I mean, I was afraid to try the things I

486
00:24:57,680 --> 00:25:00,000
Speaker 1: thought were funny because I thought, well, what if nobody

487
00:25:00,560 --> 00:25:02,159
Speaker 1: what if nobody laughs? And he was like, no, you

488
00:25:02,200 --> 00:25:04,320
Speaker 1: just have to throw stuff, like try it and see

489
00:25:04,320 --> 00:25:09,200
Speaker 1: if it sticks. And consequently I try it all now

490
00:25:09,280 --> 00:25:11,720
Speaker 1: and you know, half of it isn't any good at all,

491
00:25:11,760 --> 00:25:15,600
Speaker 1: but I still get hired. So I'm doing something okay.

492
00:25:16,400 --> 00:25:18,240
Speaker 2: And that's the thing. And I feel like that's such

493
00:25:18,240 --> 00:25:20,320
Speaker 2: good advice for lots of things.

494
00:25:20,600 --> 00:25:24,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's also like advice we can pass to other people, like, yeah,

495
00:25:24,320 --> 00:25:26,439
Speaker 1: just try, just try. It's not as precious as you

496
00:25:26,440 --> 00:25:27,760
Speaker 1: think it is, right.

497
00:25:27,720 --> 00:25:30,360
Speaker 2: And you're like, you'll get better at it the more

498
00:25:30,400 --> 00:25:31,119
Speaker 2: times you do it.

499
00:25:31,200 --> 00:25:31,720
Speaker 1: Yeah.

500
00:25:31,760 --> 00:25:34,160
Speaker 2: And I think it's the realization too, that like it's

501
00:25:34,280 --> 00:25:36,800
Speaker 2: okay to not know. Like I've found a lot of

502
00:25:36,800 --> 00:25:40,719
Speaker 2: comfort in that too, of when people are just like,

503
00:25:40,920 --> 00:25:42,800
Speaker 2: I don't know what it is let's try some stuff

504
00:25:42,960 --> 00:25:45,320
Speaker 2: or you know that. I remember the first few times

505
00:25:45,320 --> 00:25:48,560
Speaker 2: I heard that at work on the show, this joke's

506
00:25:48,560 --> 00:25:50,199
Speaker 2: not working. I don't know what it is, And then

507
00:25:50,320 --> 00:25:52,760
Speaker 2: trying things was like, oh, sometimes people just don't know.

508
00:25:53,040 --> 00:25:55,879
Speaker 1: No, yeah, but like that's it's really hard to be

509
00:25:55,960 --> 00:25:58,520
Speaker 1: like I don't know. Yeah, you want to say you

510
00:25:58,560 --> 00:26:01,040
Speaker 1: have an answer, you want to say you have, but.

511
00:26:01,040 --> 00:26:03,359
Speaker 2: I think saying I don't know is like actually really

512
00:26:03,359 --> 00:26:04,280
Speaker 2: listening to yourself.

513
00:26:04,359 --> 00:26:05,800
Speaker 1: Yeah too, Yeah, it can be.

514
00:26:06,000 --> 00:26:07,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, Steph, this was really fun.

515
00:26:08,119 --> 00:26:10,320
Speaker 1: Oh do you feel a little bit more better?

516
00:26:10,640 --> 00:26:11,480
Speaker 2: I think I do.

517
00:26:11,760 --> 00:26:17,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, I feel a little bit more better too.

518
00:26:18,280 --> 00:26:20,600
Speaker 2: Thanks for joining us, whoever is out there.

519
00:26:20,840 --> 00:26:23,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, we are really excited about the rest of the

520
00:26:23,520 --> 00:26:27,480
Speaker 1: season because I think, you know, we're just trying to

521
00:26:27,480 --> 00:26:30,320
Speaker 1: get a little bit, a little bit a little better,

522
00:26:30,800 --> 00:26:34,480
Speaker 1: you know, even if it's just these conversations with each other. Okay,

523
00:26:34,520 --> 00:26:39,800
Speaker 1: bye bye. More Better with Stephanie Melissa is a production

524
00:26:39,880 --> 00:26:44,479
Speaker 1: from WV Sound and iHeartMedia's Mike Utura podcast network, hosted

525
00:26:44,480 --> 00:26:47,560
Speaker 1: by me, Steffie Beatriz, and Melissa Fumero. More Better is

526
00:26:47,600 --> 00:26:51,120
Speaker 1: produced by Isis Madrid, Leo Clem and Sophie Spencer Zaigis.

527
00:26:51,359 --> 00:26:54,520
Speaker 1: Our executive producers are Wilmer Valderrama and Leo Clem at

528
00:26:54,760 --> 00:26:58,119
Speaker 1: w V Sound. This episode was edited by Isis Madrid

529
00:26:58,200 --> 00:27:01,320
Speaker 1: and engineered by Sean Tracy and features original music by

530
00:27:01,440 --> 00:27:04,119
Speaker 1: Madison Davenport and Heyo Boy. Our cover art is by

531
00:27:04,200 --> 00:27:07,840
Speaker 1: Vincent Remy's and photography by David Abolos. For more podcasts

532
00:27:07,880 --> 00:27:11,280
Speaker 1: from iHeart, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or.

533
00:27:11,200 --> 00:27:12,800
Speaker 2: Wherever you listen to your favorite shows.

534
00:27:13,160 --> 00:27:16,480
Speaker 1: See you next week's suck Us Bye,