1 00:00:00,960 --> 00:00:04,280 Speaker 1: Hi. This is Laura Vandercam. I'm a mother of four, 2 00:00:04,600 --> 00:00:08,479 Speaker 1: an author, journalist, and speaker. And this is Sarah Hart Hunger. 3 00:00:08,840 --> 00:00:11,799 Speaker 1: I'm a mother of three, practicing physician and blogger. On 4 00:00:11,840 --> 00:00:14,640 Speaker 1: the side, we are two working parents who love our 5 00:00:14,680 --> 00:00:17,880 Speaker 1: careers and our families. Welcome to best of both worlds. 6 00:00:18,320 --> 00:00:21,560 Speaker 1: Here we talk about how real women manage work, family, 7 00:00:21,760 --> 00:00:25,360 Speaker 1: and time for fun, from figuring out childcare to mapping 8 00:00:25,400 --> 00:00:28,240 Speaker 1: out long term career goals. We want you to get 9 00:00:28,280 --> 00:00:32,839 Speaker 1: the most out of life. Welcome to best of both worlds. 10 00:00:32,880 --> 00:00:35,680 Speaker 1: This is Laura. This is episode one hundred and thirty one, 11 00:00:35,720 --> 00:00:38,560 Speaker 1: which is first airing February fourth, although we are taping 12 00:00:38,640 --> 00:00:41,080 Speaker 1: it a bit ahead of time, as we are wont 13 00:00:41,240 --> 00:00:44,120 Speaker 1: to do this week, we are going to be discussing 14 00:00:44,920 --> 00:00:48,040 Speaker 1: getting caught up. When you want the world to sort 15 00:00:48,080 --> 00:00:50,640 Speaker 1: of stop spinning for a week so you can get 16 00:00:50,680 --> 00:00:53,880 Speaker 1: back on top of things, have a clean slate, which 17 00:00:53,880 --> 00:01:00,000 Speaker 1: of course may not ever happen, but we can all daydream. So, Sarah, 18 00:01:00,080 --> 00:01:04,400 Speaker 1: when do you feel most overwhelmed? I was just thinking 19 00:01:04,400 --> 00:01:06,400 Speaker 1: as you were saying that, like, maybe it will happen, 20 00:01:06,640 --> 00:01:09,240 Speaker 1: Maybe maybe we can stop time. I don't know that 21 00:01:09,319 --> 00:01:11,720 Speaker 1: sounds great talk about it. I mean, I've gotten fairly 22 00:01:11,800 --> 00:01:15,360 Speaker 1: clean when I'm in the right, when all the stars aligned, 23 00:01:15,440 --> 00:01:17,720 Speaker 1: I suppose, But no, I will say the times that 24 00:01:17,760 --> 00:01:20,119 Speaker 1: I definitely have not been able to have a clean 25 00:01:20,160 --> 00:01:23,440 Speaker 1: slate and have had to just accept it are during 26 00:01:23,440 --> 00:01:27,120 Speaker 1: the newborn and pumping season, which we're gonna get to 27 00:01:27,120 --> 00:01:30,160 Speaker 1: a listener question where the listener is in that season, 28 00:01:30,640 --> 00:01:33,000 Speaker 1: because I feel like that lack of sleep plus the hormones, 29 00:01:33,040 --> 00:01:35,840 Speaker 1: plus something about those hormones for me, tend to lead 30 00:01:35,880 --> 00:01:38,520 Speaker 1: to a lot of unreasonable expectations, like you're just supposed 31 00:01:38,520 --> 00:01:41,640 Speaker 1: to be back in all cylinders, so it's like a 32 00:01:41,640 --> 00:01:45,080 Speaker 1: perfect storm for me. Yeah. I used to really struggle 33 00:01:45,240 --> 00:01:48,200 Speaker 1: when I was fully clinical and had literally zero built 34 00:01:48,200 --> 00:01:50,360 Speaker 1: in flexibility when I would take a week off and 35 00:01:50,400 --> 00:01:51,840 Speaker 1: then come or two weeks even or a week and 36 00:01:51,840 --> 00:01:55,560 Speaker 1: a half for whatever, and come back, and our managers 37 00:01:55,600 --> 00:01:57,680 Speaker 1: didn't allow us to build any catch up time into 38 00:01:57,720 --> 00:02:00,280 Speaker 1: our schedule, so we'd be faced with like, you know, 39 00:02:00,360 --> 00:02:02,840 Speaker 1: a full patient load that day, but then also an 40 00:02:02,880 --> 00:02:06,880 Speaker 1: inbox with like thirty messages. I mean, because colleagues covering, 41 00:02:07,000 --> 00:02:11,320 Speaker 1: I mean, they'll cover for urgent things, but many of 42 00:02:11,360 --> 00:02:13,680 Speaker 1: my lab result type stuff are important but not urgent, 43 00:02:13,720 --> 00:02:15,800 Speaker 1: so the family could wait a week and a half safely, 44 00:02:15,840 --> 00:02:18,240 Speaker 1: but they still need, like me to call with a 45 00:02:18,400 --> 00:02:20,960 Speaker 1: cognizant conversation and have to look back and see what 46 00:02:21,000 --> 00:02:23,960 Speaker 1: we were doing. And that was very overwhelming. So that 47 00:02:24,040 --> 00:02:27,959 Speaker 1: was hard. And then I would say that I'm not 48 00:02:28,040 --> 00:02:30,720 Speaker 1: immune to procrastinating, and it was some upholders love to, 49 00:02:31,440 --> 00:02:36,160 Speaker 1: you know, do things very incrementally. I will. I'm good 50 00:02:36,160 --> 00:02:39,920 Speaker 1: at knowing kind of what I can and cannot procrastinate on. 51 00:02:40,080 --> 00:02:42,919 Speaker 1: So for example, when I was studying for my medical boards, 52 00:02:42,960 --> 00:02:44,880 Speaker 1: I was very good about making a study schedule and 53 00:02:44,880 --> 00:02:47,240 Speaker 1: sticking to it and you know, doing X number of 54 00:02:47,360 --> 00:02:50,640 Speaker 1: questions on each day with each topic. But when I 55 00:02:50,720 --> 00:02:52,639 Speaker 1: know that I can get away with pushing it forward, 56 00:02:52,680 --> 00:02:56,320 Speaker 1: I often do, so that that can be overwhelming. Yeah, 57 00:02:56,440 --> 00:03:01,200 Speaker 1: now I gotta say I've been relative good of late, 58 00:03:01,200 --> 00:03:03,720 Speaker 1: which some of it I think is just a combination 59 00:03:03,880 --> 00:03:06,840 Speaker 1: of having older children, which although when with this errors, 60 00:03:06,840 --> 00:03:10,320 Speaker 1: that probably will not be the case anymore, and you know, 61 00:03:10,400 --> 00:03:13,680 Speaker 1: having adequate childcare, which is also a big part of 62 00:03:13,680 --> 00:03:16,280 Speaker 1: it and something we will get into in the body 63 00:03:16,280 --> 00:03:19,040 Speaker 1: of this episode. The times I think I felt most 64 00:03:19,160 --> 00:03:21,840 Speaker 1: overwhelmed in the past is when I've lost a lot 65 00:03:21,880 --> 00:03:25,040 Speaker 1: of time during the week due to say sick days, 66 00:03:25,919 --> 00:03:29,280 Speaker 1: whether kid events, you know, the various things that can 67 00:03:29,320 --> 00:03:32,720 Speaker 1: go wrong with four children or go right. I mean, 68 00:03:32,760 --> 00:03:34,080 Speaker 1: it should be that they just have a lot of 69 00:03:34,080 --> 00:03:37,400 Speaker 1: stuff at school. I have to attend and then you know, 70 00:03:38,320 --> 00:03:41,080 Speaker 1: the time has to get made up somewhere, you know. 71 00:03:41,440 --> 00:03:45,160 Speaker 1: But there are ways to kind of cope with all this. 72 00:03:46,760 --> 00:03:50,240 Speaker 1: One of the strategies we came up with is that 73 00:03:50,280 --> 00:03:52,200 Speaker 1: if I had been covering a lot of stuff during 74 00:03:52,200 --> 00:03:56,800 Speaker 1: the week, then weekends become work time for me, basically 75 00:03:56,840 --> 00:04:00,480 Speaker 1: the full time, and Michael will take the kids we're 76 00:04:00,520 --> 00:04:03,880 Speaker 1: out and I will work in my home office and 77 00:04:03,880 --> 00:04:06,720 Speaker 1: it's just another work day. And the truth is, if 78 00:04:06,760 --> 00:04:09,800 Speaker 1: you're working from say ten to four or five on 79 00:04:09,840 --> 00:04:14,000 Speaker 1: a Saturday, you can get a ton done. So big 80 00:04:14,360 --> 00:04:16,680 Speaker 1: fan of that strategy. And of course the kids have 81 00:04:16,760 --> 00:04:21,080 Speaker 1: then had some interesting adventures. I was remembering one back 82 00:04:21,120 --> 00:04:24,120 Speaker 1: when we were living in New York where Michael took 83 00:04:24,200 --> 00:04:26,520 Speaker 1: our two older boys, because that's who we had at 84 00:04:26,520 --> 00:04:30,880 Speaker 1: the time, to the Coney Island Mermaid Parade. And this 85 00:04:31,080 --> 00:04:35,960 Speaker 1: is quite the campy experience of various New Yorkers who 86 00:04:35,960 --> 00:04:39,520 Speaker 1: have decided to dress up as mermaids, some in more 87 00:04:39,560 --> 00:04:42,840 Speaker 1: clothing than others, which I think the little boys were 88 00:04:42,880 --> 00:04:45,440 Speaker 1: probably too young to really appreciate that. I'm probably sure 89 00:04:45,480 --> 00:04:48,719 Speaker 1: my husband may have appreciated it, but I was like, 90 00:04:48,839 --> 00:04:51,839 Speaker 1: I hope they got video of that. I told later 91 00:04:51,880 --> 00:04:56,320 Speaker 1: he'd taken them to this, and they're like, oh my gosh, 92 00:04:56,600 --> 00:04:58,520 Speaker 1: so I kind of want to go to them. They 93 00:04:58,520 --> 00:05:03,520 Speaker 1: were exposed to the fun of New York and mermaids, 94 00:05:03,560 --> 00:05:05,560 Speaker 1: So there we go. No. I like that, though, like 95 00:05:05,600 --> 00:05:09,000 Speaker 1: the weekend pop off valve, I think can be very helpful. 96 00:05:09,040 --> 00:05:11,560 Speaker 1: Sometimes I used to use like call days to do 97 00:05:12,080 --> 00:05:14,679 Speaker 1: call wasn't very heavy. That's a great time to disappear 98 00:05:14,720 --> 00:05:16,480 Speaker 1: into your office and get a lot of stuff done. 99 00:05:16,720 --> 00:05:20,040 Speaker 1: Unlike you. A lot of times my husband or sometimes 100 00:05:20,040 --> 00:05:21,760 Speaker 1: my husband will be working on a weekend when I'm 101 00:05:21,760 --> 00:05:23,960 Speaker 1: desperately needing to catch up, especially if it was a 102 00:05:23,960 --> 00:05:26,480 Speaker 1: week that he was working a lot, so instead of 103 00:05:26,720 --> 00:05:30,719 Speaker 1: having him take the kids, the answer is usually childcare, which, 104 00:05:30,760 --> 00:05:33,760 Speaker 1: as we talked about, that's kind of a theme. The 105 00:05:33,760 --> 00:05:38,080 Speaker 1: theme it's often the answer. But so getting into our 106 00:05:38,480 --> 00:05:42,640 Speaker 1: listener question on which this episode is based. This was 107 00:05:42,800 --> 00:05:45,559 Speaker 1: one that it was posted on your blog, wasn't it, Sarah, 108 00:05:45,640 --> 00:05:47,800 Speaker 1: I think this is where this came from. Nope, it 109 00:05:47,839 --> 00:05:51,119 Speaker 1: was an email. It was an email. Okay, I think yeah, 110 00:05:51,200 --> 00:05:53,240 Speaker 1: there was a comment similar to this. It was inspired 111 00:05:53,240 --> 00:05:54,680 Speaker 1: by the blog, and I think that we put those 112 00:05:54,680 --> 00:05:58,800 Speaker 1: two things together and we're like, this needs its own episode. Yes, definitely, 113 00:05:58,920 --> 00:06:01,800 Speaker 1: definitely so. Our listener writes in that she is a 114 00:06:01,839 --> 00:06:04,440 Speaker 1: mother of two ages three and a half and six months. 115 00:06:04,480 --> 00:06:06,760 Speaker 1: Soga has a new baby and went back to work 116 00:06:06,800 --> 00:06:09,560 Speaker 1: after her second child at eighty percent, so that was 117 00:06:09,600 --> 00:06:13,600 Speaker 1: four days a week. However, she says, my job responsibilities 118 00:06:13,640 --> 00:06:16,000 Speaker 1: did not drop by twenty percent. It was only the 119 00:06:16,080 --> 00:06:19,200 Speaker 1: time in which to do them that dropped. I use 120 00:06:19,279 --> 00:06:21,200 Speaker 1: my day off every week to run around like a 121 00:06:21,200 --> 00:06:24,560 Speaker 1: crazy person and take care of appointments, laundry, general house cleanup, 122 00:06:24,600 --> 00:06:27,880 Speaker 1: meal prep, errands, etc. Both boys are in daycare full time, 123 00:06:27,920 --> 00:06:30,520 Speaker 1: which is located right next door to our house. She 124 00:06:30,640 --> 00:06:36,200 Speaker 1: says she works in healthcare. She's a genetic counselor does research. 125 00:06:37,040 --> 00:06:38,760 Speaker 1: All of this means that there are a few hard 126 00:06:38,800 --> 00:06:41,160 Speaker 1: deadlines in her field, and thus far her boss has 127 00:06:41,200 --> 00:06:44,279 Speaker 1: been content with things just taking longer. She had floated 128 00:06:44,320 --> 00:06:46,240 Speaker 1: the idea of extra help when a colleague left a 129 00:06:46,279 --> 00:06:49,520 Speaker 1: few years ago, but that did not happen. So while 130 00:06:49,560 --> 00:06:51,919 Speaker 1: she says her boss is fine with her level of productivity, 131 00:06:52,040 --> 00:06:55,279 Speaker 1: she finds that she is increasingly behind on everything work 132 00:06:55,440 --> 00:06:58,000 Speaker 1: due to the lack of time home life due to 133 00:06:58,080 --> 00:07:00,240 Speaker 1: bringing work home to make up for the lack of time. 134 00:07:00,279 --> 00:07:02,800 Speaker 1: At her job, she has a two hour commute, meaning 135 00:07:02,800 --> 00:07:05,479 Speaker 1: an hour each way and try it's still pumping, so 136 00:07:05,520 --> 00:07:07,360 Speaker 1: she's trying to fit in two to three pump sessions 137 00:07:07,360 --> 00:07:09,680 Speaker 1: per day while at work. She says she also runs 138 00:07:09,680 --> 00:07:11,520 Speaker 1: at least three to four days a week very early 139 00:07:11,560 --> 00:07:13,360 Speaker 1: in the morning in order to save her sanity, but 140 00:07:13,440 --> 00:07:16,240 Speaker 1: sometimes questions if the lack of sleep is worth it. 141 00:07:16,960 --> 00:07:18,680 Speaker 1: She says, I can think of some changes to put 142 00:07:18,720 --> 00:07:21,280 Speaker 1: in place to streamline things moving forward, but no, a 143 00:07:21,360 --> 00:07:23,280 Speaker 1: number of small tweaks will help me dig out of 144 00:07:23,320 --> 00:07:26,320 Speaker 1: my current hole. What I really want is for the 145 00:07:26,360 --> 00:07:29,240 Speaker 1: world to stand still for a week so that I 146 00:07:29,280 --> 00:07:31,840 Speaker 1: can get a whole bunch of stuff done and then 147 00:07:31,960 --> 00:07:36,240 Speaker 1: start fresh. Given that this is unlikely to happen, do 148 00:07:36,280 --> 00:07:39,560 Speaker 1: you guys have suggestions for how to play catch up? 149 00:07:41,200 --> 00:07:42,880 Speaker 1: I love how She puts that because I feel like 150 00:07:42,920 --> 00:07:46,480 Speaker 1: I've had that exact exact I want everything else to 151 00:07:46,520 --> 00:07:50,040 Speaker 1: several occasions. I mean, it's just it's actually a fun 152 00:07:50,520 --> 00:07:54,240 Speaker 1: concept to dream about. I think you can probably the 153 00:07:54,240 --> 00:07:56,680 Speaker 1: subject of many a novel. In fact, I think that, 154 00:07:57,040 --> 00:07:59,920 Speaker 1: yeah that's true. Well, yeah, that's like a big miracle. 155 00:08:00,200 --> 00:08:02,080 Speaker 1: He's all about the clean slate where no one has 156 00:08:02,120 --> 00:08:04,640 Speaker 1: anything to do and find yourself in a cabin in 157 00:08:04,680 --> 00:08:10,520 Speaker 1: a beautiful woodland setting in northern Japan. But yeah, no, 158 00:08:10,560 --> 00:08:14,640 Speaker 1: it's true. I mean it's such a nice idea. Yeah, 159 00:08:14,680 --> 00:08:17,560 Speaker 1: and yet, so you know, we had a couple thoughts 160 00:08:17,560 --> 00:08:20,000 Speaker 1: for our listener. I'm sure lots of people listening to 161 00:08:20,080 --> 00:08:22,600 Speaker 1: this have thoughts as well, and we welcome you writing 162 00:08:22,640 --> 00:08:24,680 Speaker 1: in with your ideas. I hope you'll post them on 163 00:08:24,840 --> 00:08:28,480 Speaker 1: my blog and on our Instagram account when this episode runs, 164 00:08:28,960 --> 00:08:30,680 Speaker 1: because I think this is a situation a lot of 165 00:08:30,720 --> 00:08:32,520 Speaker 1: us have found ourselves in, and I think people will 166 00:08:32,559 --> 00:08:35,080 Speaker 1: have a lot of great ideas for her. My first, 167 00:08:35,320 --> 00:08:37,440 Speaker 1: you know, I'll get on my soapbox here, which you know, 168 00:08:37,480 --> 00:08:40,840 Speaker 1: people probably know what's coming. The hazard of going to 169 00:08:41,000 --> 00:08:44,040 Speaker 1: eighty percent, you know, I totally see the appeal in 170 00:08:44,080 --> 00:08:46,000 Speaker 1: her case of the four day week because she has 171 00:08:46,000 --> 00:08:47,439 Speaker 1: such a long commute, Like this is one of the 172 00:08:47,520 --> 00:08:50,959 Speaker 1: situations where it slightly makes more sense than others where 173 00:08:50,960 --> 00:08:55,040 Speaker 1: people are like, oh, your workload will be reduced somehow magically, 174 00:08:55,200 --> 00:08:57,880 Speaker 1: but you still need to come in every day. In 175 00:08:57,920 --> 00:08:59,960 Speaker 1: her case, she is actually going to a four day weeks, 176 00:09:00,000 --> 00:09:02,720 Speaker 1: so it's more like it's an eighty percent schedule. But 177 00:09:02,760 --> 00:09:05,280 Speaker 1: as she said, you know, if there's no corresponding drop 178 00:09:05,320 --> 00:09:09,680 Speaker 1: in workload, she's just working full time and not getting 179 00:09:09,720 --> 00:09:12,360 Speaker 1: paid for it. And it's possible that she's doing it 180 00:09:12,360 --> 00:09:14,440 Speaker 1: in thirty two hours a week. It's also possible that 181 00:09:14,480 --> 00:09:17,560 Speaker 1: she is getting most of this time on her day 182 00:09:17,600 --> 00:09:20,600 Speaker 1: off on the weekends, so that she's working closer to 183 00:09:20,679 --> 00:09:24,800 Speaker 1: forty anyway. And if that's the case, that that's a 184 00:09:24,800 --> 00:09:27,439 Speaker 1: little bit more troublesome. The fact that she says she's 185 00:09:27,520 --> 00:09:30,280 Speaker 1: using her day off to run errands and things like that. 186 00:09:30,679 --> 00:09:32,160 Speaker 1: You know, this is this is also one of these 187 00:09:32,160 --> 00:09:35,720 Speaker 1: things that bothers me because clearly she's doing genetic research. 188 00:09:35,800 --> 00:09:38,640 Speaker 1: She has a lot of specialized training. I'm not sure 189 00:09:38,720 --> 00:09:42,880 Speaker 1: what the economic efficiency is here of having somebody who 190 00:09:42,960 --> 00:09:47,760 Speaker 1: has that specialized you know, high end role in the 191 00:09:47,800 --> 00:09:50,600 Speaker 1: labor market doing this stuff that is, you know, unpaid 192 00:09:50,640 --> 00:09:53,160 Speaker 1: labor with her day off. I'm not sure that that 193 00:09:53,240 --> 00:09:55,839 Speaker 1: was a great trade off. So you know, what can 194 00:09:55,880 --> 00:09:57,959 Speaker 1: she do? One option is to try and convince her 195 00:09:57,960 --> 00:10:00,840 Speaker 1: boss that she's working full time, so let's pay her 196 00:10:00,880 --> 00:10:03,320 Speaker 1: for a full time. She could keep a time log 197 00:10:03,480 --> 00:10:05,480 Speaker 1: to show this of the hours she's working at night's, 198 00:10:05,520 --> 00:10:08,080 Speaker 1: weekends and her day off. Or she could just go 199 00:10:08,120 --> 00:10:10,240 Speaker 1: in and ask to sub a work from home day 200 00:10:10,640 --> 00:10:13,640 Speaker 1: for her day off, so that she is in fact 201 00:10:13,640 --> 00:10:15,720 Speaker 1: working five days. It's just one day is from home. 202 00:10:15,920 --> 00:10:17,640 Speaker 1: I mean, heck, why not go in and say two 203 00:10:17,720 --> 00:10:19,400 Speaker 1: days off. I don't know if she has you know, 204 00:10:19,400 --> 00:10:21,440 Speaker 1: equipment she has to be using, but if some of 205 00:10:21,440 --> 00:10:24,760 Speaker 1: it is more you know, spreadsheets or computer based or whatever, 206 00:10:24,840 --> 00:10:26,640 Speaker 1: maybe she can do that at home. So this person 207 00:10:26,760 --> 00:10:30,680 Speaker 1: may actually be doing patient care, oh you face on, Yeah, 208 00:10:30,760 --> 00:10:34,480 Speaker 1: because well she's doing research, you know, she said, she 209 00:10:34,520 --> 00:10:37,679 Speaker 1: says she's taking work home, so clearly you're right. You're right. 210 00:10:37,760 --> 00:10:40,040 Speaker 1: Even if she has some clinical roles, she probably doesn't 211 00:10:40,040 --> 00:10:42,520 Speaker 1: need to have FaceTime with patients every day. Yeah, probably 212 00:10:42,640 --> 00:10:47,240 Speaker 1: it needs one day per week, probably more. When that's 213 00:10:47,280 --> 00:10:49,760 Speaker 1: not the case. Yeah, correct, So so it sounds like 214 00:10:49,920 --> 00:10:53,000 Speaker 1: it might be possible to do the the email and 215 00:10:53,120 --> 00:10:57,800 Speaker 1: the you know, research component of it, running models or 216 00:10:57,840 --> 00:11:01,520 Speaker 1: whatever on that day at home or something, so, you know, 217 00:11:01,640 --> 00:11:04,560 Speaker 1: and that doesn't change her workload. Again, like she still 218 00:11:04,559 --> 00:11:06,040 Speaker 1: has the workload, but I think she'd feel a lot 219 00:11:06,040 --> 00:11:07,920 Speaker 1: better about it if she's getting paid one hundred percent 220 00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:10,920 Speaker 1: versus eighty percent. Right, I mean that does make tense. 221 00:11:10,920 --> 00:11:14,680 Speaker 1: I'm sure it probably would allow her to not be 222 00:11:14,800 --> 00:11:17,720 Speaker 1: so behind, and then she would be less stressed. Yes, exactly, 223 00:11:18,400 --> 00:11:22,120 Speaker 1: that's true. The other thing I will bring up, which 224 00:11:22,679 --> 00:11:25,400 Speaker 1: some people may argue with me on this, is that 225 00:11:25,440 --> 00:11:31,120 Speaker 1: she doesn't have to pump. She wants to pump, she 226 00:11:31,200 --> 00:11:34,520 Speaker 1: wants to think, or she wouldn't be doing it. I mean, okay, 227 00:11:34,559 --> 00:11:37,560 Speaker 1: my devil's advocate there is that I tortured myself, and 228 00:11:37,600 --> 00:11:39,959 Speaker 1: I have no regrets. I'm glad I did it. It 229 00:11:40,080 --> 00:11:43,480 Speaker 1: was fine. It was really annoying, but I really enjoyed 230 00:11:43,520 --> 00:11:45,960 Speaker 1: having kind of a prolonged nursing relationship with John Vievee. 231 00:11:46,000 --> 00:11:48,360 Speaker 1: I don't know if that could or would have happened 232 00:11:48,360 --> 00:11:50,520 Speaker 1: had I stopped pumping at six months. Maybe it would 233 00:11:50,559 --> 00:11:54,079 Speaker 1: have maybe it wouldn't have. I did stop abruptly before 234 00:11:54,120 --> 00:11:56,160 Speaker 1: I hit the twelve month mark, and it was wonderful. 235 00:11:57,320 --> 00:11:59,920 Speaker 1: But I mean, maybe this person has a goal in 236 00:12:00,360 --> 00:12:04,000 Speaker 1: and six months isn't that long. I mean, like, if 237 00:12:04,040 --> 00:12:05,560 Speaker 1: she's pumping for a two year old, yeah, we can 238 00:12:05,600 --> 00:12:09,040 Speaker 1: start having a conversation, but really, like that's twenty six 239 00:12:09,080 --> 00:12:11,400 Speaker 1: more weeks of her life. It's like half a planner. 240 00:12:11,440 --> 00:12:13,640 Speaker 1: It's like, yes, it's going to suck for a short time, 241 00:12:13,640 --> 00:12:15,120 Speaker 1: but then she's done. But then, I think that's the 242 00:12:15,120 --> 00:12:18,000 Speaker 1: mindset you have to have about it, right, It's that, yes, 243 00:12:18,160 --> 00:12:21,320 Speaker 1: this is an activity that takes time, and we can't 244 00:12:21,360 --> 00:12:25,160 Speaker 1: pretend that it doesn't take no time. It absolutely takes time. 245 00:12:25,440 --> 00:12:27,600 Speaker 1: Well that's where my tip comes from, just being like, 246 00:12:28,160 --> 00:12:30,240 Speaker 1: this may be the time you have to just like 247 00:12:30,880 --> 00:12:33,520 Speaker 1: get a little essential about what you care about. And 248 00:12:33,559 --> 00:12:35,400 Speaker 1: maybe pumping is and maybe it's not. So I mean, 249 00:12:35,440 --> 00:12:37,680 Speaker 1: it's absolutely valid not to pump to It's a Laura's 250 00:12:37,679 --> 00:12:40,040 Speaker 1: point is well taken. I just have a gut feeling 251 00:12:40,440 --> 00:12:42,800 Speaker 1: from the way this person wrote that they're like not 252 00:12:43,440 --> 00:12:46,560 Speaker 1: terribly negotiable on that. Yeah, but you know, even if 253 00:12:46,559 --> 00:12:48,120 Speaker 1: it wasn't a year, I mean, if she decided I'm 254 00:12:48,120 --> 00:12:50,679 Speaker 1: going to pump to eight or nine months, right, that 255 00:12:50,760 --> 00:12:53,640 Speaker 1: could be an option, or say that I'm trying to 256 00:12:53,679 --> 00:12:55,600 Speaker 1: get to a year, but I'm only going to pump 257 00:12:55,640 --> 00:12:59,079 Speaker 1: once a day, right, Like, Yeah, there are various ways 258 00:12:59,120 --> 00:13:01,400 Speaker 1: that this does not have to be all or nothing. 259 00:13:01,960 --> 00:13:04,880 Speaker 1: And again, given that this is an activity that does 260 00:13:05,080 --> 00:13:09,000 Speaker 1: take time, you can embrace that inside. That's and she's 261 00:13:09,000 --> 00:13:11,240 Speaker 1: doing like a four am pump like some of her 262 00:13:11,280 --> 00:13:13,439 Speaker 1: pumping is a little So you could decide this is 263 00:13:13,480 --> 00:13:15,679 Speaker 1: something I want to do and that's great. Or you 264 00:13:15,720 --> 00:13:18,520 Speaker 1: could decide like, I don't have to do this, and 265 00:13:18,559 --> 00:13:21,000 Speaker 1: then that will free up some more time. And it 266 00:13:21,000 --> 00:13:22,959 Speaker 1: could be gradations of that, like I pump once a 267 00:13:23,040 --> 00:13:25,680 Speaker 1: day and then I've freed up you know, another hour 268 00:13:25,840 --> 00:13:28,400 Speaker 1: that I'm not pumping three times day or something along 269 00:13:28,400 --> 00:13:34,400 Speaker 1: those lines. So that's that one. The other question is 270 00:13:34,400 --> 00:13:38,160 Speaker 1: is does she have a partner. I would presume with 271 00:13:38,200 --> 00:13:41,000 Speaker 1: a six month old baby that she probably has one. 272 00:13:41,520 --> 00:13:45,560 Speaker 1: If that's the case, use this person for the weekends, 273 00:13:45,600 --> 00:13:49,120 Speaker 1: like we suggested, you know, take Saturday or Sunday to 274 00:13:49,559 --> 00:13:52,520 Speaker 1: get caught up on work while this other person has 275 00:13:52,600 --> 00:13:55,720 Speaker 1: the kids for a chunk of time and finally just 276 00:13:55,760 --> 00:13:59,360 Speaker 1: you know, questioning this overwhelmed narrative because no one ever 277 00:13:59,480 --> 00:14:01,360 Speaker 1: really has a clean slate. I think, you know, you 278 00:14:01,360 --> 00:14:03,439 Speaker 1: can torture yourself with like, oh, I need to get 279 00:14:03,480 --> 00:14:05,840 Speaker 1: to the clean slate. Well, you know, we all just 280 00:14:05,920 --> 00:14:10,920 Speaker 1: have stuff. There's always going to be projects, there's always stuff. 281 00:14:11,040 --> 00:14:12,760 Speaker 1: I wonder if what she means by clean slate is 282 00:14:12,800 --> 00:14:14,840 Speaker 1: like that feeling when you have so many to do 283 00:14:14,960 --> 00:14:17,120 Speaker 1: items that you like, don't know where any of them are, 284 00:14:17,320 --> 00:14:19,120 Speaker 1: Like you don't know where to start, Like I think, 285 00:14:19,800 --> 00:14:21,800 Speaker 1: I mean, one of my things was to take a 286 00:14:21,880 --> 00:14:24,880 Speaker 1: day where you're just kind of cleaning up, not meaning 287 00:14:24,920 --> 00:14:26,880 Speaker 1: to get everything done because that's not going to happen 288 00:14:26,920 --> 00:14:29,120 Speaker 1: in a day, but like making sure all of your 289 00:14:29,160 --> 00:14:31,720 Speaker 1: to do is are written, you know, kept somewhere where 290 00:14:31,720 --> 00:14:34,720 Speaker 1: they make sense to you, where you've prioritized to certain ones, 291 00:14:34,760 --> 00:14:36,560 Speaker 1: and kind of laid out a plan for what's short 292 00:14:36,640 --> 00:14:38,880 Speaker 1: term and what's emergent and what's long term, and maybe 293 00:14:38,920 --> 00:14:41,520 Speaker 1: even like as part of that, set up that strategic 294 00:14:41,560 --> 00:14:44,640 Speaker 1: childcare so that if there's something that's urgent and bothering 295 00:14:44,680 --> 00:14:46,640 Speaker 1: you on on a moment's a moment basis, you then 296 00:14:46,680 --> 00:14:49,680 Speaker 1: have like a realistic plan to get it done. Yeah, 297 00:14:49,760 --> 00:14:51,320 Speaker 1: I don't know if some of this is more like 298 00:14:51,640 --> 00:14:53,800 Speaker 1: she can't see all of her cards on the table, 299 00:14:53,840 --> 00:14:56,400 Speaker 1: so it's just freaking her out. That could be, and 300 00:14:56,440 --> 00:14:59,960 Speaker 1: we'll get to Sarah's ideas right after this quick ad break. 301 00:15:03,640 --> 00:15:06,440 Speaker 1: Hey listeners, we know you're busy, but is there something 302 00:15:06,480 --> 00:15:09,280 Speaker 1: that's interfering with your happiness or is preventing you from 303 00:15:09,320 --> 00:15:13,680 Speaker 1: achieving your goals. 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Right, 366 00:18:44,880 --> 00:18:47,960 Speaker 1: well we are back with episode one point thirty one, 367 00:18:48,119 --> 00:18:52,120 Speaker 1: talking about the hope that the world will stop spinning 368 00:18:52,200 --> 00:18:54,359 Speaker 1: for a week or so so people can get caught 369 00:18:54,440 --> 00:18:57,640 Speaker 1: up when they're feeling behind, and we've been discussing various 370 00:18:57,800 --> 00:19:01,800 Speaker 1: ways to deal without failing based on a listener question 371 00:19:02,000 --> 00:19:05,040 Speaker 1: along th line. So, Sarah, what are you suggesting for 372 00:19:05,080 --> 00:19:08,280 Speaker 1: our listener? I mean, similarly to what you mentioned about 373 00:19:08,280 --> 00:19:10,520 Speaker 1: the partner. It could be a partner, but as I mentioned, 374 00:19:10,600 --> 00:19:12,959 Speaker 1: sometimes this might be a season where you need more 375 00:19:13,040 --> 00:19:15,919 Speaker 1: childcare help, and it might be a season where instead 376 00:19:15,960 --> 00:19:18,320 Speaker 1: of thinking of it as a super long term solution, 377 00:19:18,760 --> 00:19:21,040 Speaker 1: maybe it's a short term solution. Maybe if you are 378 00:19:21,080 --> 00:19:24,520 Speaker 1: dedicated to pumping, then this is a time that you 379 00:19:24,640 --> 00:19:27,439 Speaker 1: need to spend some time on the weekends making up 380 00:19:27,440 --> 00:19:29,119 Speaker 1: work that you're falling behind on in the week Like, 381 00:19:29,160 --> 00:19:32,440 Speaker 1: admit to yourself that this may be a temporary period 382 00:19:32,560 --> 00:19:35,280 Speaker 1: where you need more because I get the temptation of like, oh, 383 00:19:35,320 --> 00:19:37,359 Speaker 1: I can't afford that. Well, maybe you can't afford that 384 00:19:37,400 --> 00:19:40,280 Speaker 1: for the next five years, but maybe you can afford 385 00:19:40,320 --> 00:19:42,880 Speaker 1: it for the next six months and it will help 386 00:19:42,920 --> 00:19:46,280 Speaker 1: get you out of that baby stage. Yeah, yeah, my 387 00:19:46,359 --> 00:19:49,120 Speaker 1: other things are well I kind of mentioned this, but yeah, 388 00:19:49,160 --> 00:19:51,560 Speaker 1: trust see, if you can schedule a catch up day, 389 00:19:51,600 --> 00:19:53,240 Speaker 1: like just try to pick a day where you don't 390 00:19:53,240 --> 00:19:56,280 Speaker 1: have meetings or other obligations and literally right on the 391 00:19:56,280 --> 00:19:58,600 Speaker 1: top of your you know, whatever your outlook calendar, you're 392 00:19:58,640 --> 00:20:01,240 Speaker 1: busy because you're going to spend that day clearing the decks, 393 00:20:01,960 --> 00:20:04,360 Speaker 1: you know, organizing your to do is figuring out what's 394 00:20:04,400 --> 00:20:06,400 Speaker 1: really dire. Maybe this would be a time to put 395 00:20:06,440 --> 00:20:08,560 Speaker 1: a proposal together about that day that you could work 396 00:20:08,560 --> 00:20:10,639 Speaker 1: from home and get paid for it. You know, just 397 00:20:10,720 --> 00:20:13,359 Speaker 1: kind of like you can't stop time and do everything, 398 00:20:13,359 --> 00:20:16,040 Speaker 1: but you can't stap time a little bit to some 399 00:20:16,160 --> 00:20:18,920 Speaker 1: extent and kind of take stock. I also think that 400 00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:22,080 Speaker 1: maybe scheduling like a little personal retreat day a couple 401 00:20:22,200 --> 00:20:24,320 Speaker 1: months out might be nice, because then you have something 402 00:20:24,320 --> 00:20:26,760 Speaker 1: to look forward to and the harder period is over. 403 00:20:27,760 --> 00:20:29,359 Speaker 1: One question I really like. I don't know if it 404 00:20:29,400 --> 00:20:31,240 Speaker 1: was from you, lare or some other source, but someone's like, 405 00:20:31,280 --> 00:20:34,440 Speaker 1: well this matter in five years. I find that that helps. 406 00:20:34,720 --> 00:20:36,560 Speaker 1: It was during the holiday season and I had about 407 00:20:36,600 --> 00:20:38,679 Speaker 1: fifteen thousand invites, and I was very stressed and not 408 00:20:38,720 --> 00:20:40,280 Speaker 1: in the mood to go to any of them. I 409 00:20:40,320 --> 00:20:42,159 Speaker 1: was like, well, anyone care in five years if I 410 00:20:42,200 --> 00:20:44,960 Speaker 1: like didn't go to the twenty nineteen holiday parties, no 411 00:20:45,000 --> 00:20:47,840 Speaker 1: one will care, Like, there's no way that that will 412 00:20:47,880 --> 00:20:50,199 Speaker 1: come back to haunt me. So I'm gonna do what 413 00:20:50,240 --> 00:20:52,399 Speaker 1: I want right now now. If it's like a pattern 414 00:20:52,480 --> 00:20:54,159 Speaker 1: forever that I never go to a party again and 415 00:20:54,240 --> 00:20:57,040 Speaker 1: never socialize, of course that's an issue. But like on 416 00:20:57,119 --> 00:21:00,000 Speaker 1: a when things are tough, when you're in that dire stage, 417 00:21:00,240 --> 00:21:02,439 Speaker 1: you have to figure out what works and sometimes that 418 00:21:02,520 --> 00:21:07,399 Speaker 1: long term question I think is helpful, And then I 419 00:21:07,480 --> 00:21:09,320 Speaker 1: just I love my to do lists, and this is 420 00:21:09,359 --> 00:21:11,359 Speaker 1: sort of like the taking stock, but make sure you're not. 421 00:21:12,200 --> 00:21:14,720 Speaker 1: It does sound like you have a lot of expectations 422 00:21:14,720 --> 00:21:16,400 Speaker 1: of things that you're trying to fit in each day 423 00:21:16,480 --> 00:21:19,440 Speaker 1: with your four am pump and your five am group 424 00:21:19,520 --> 00:21:21,639 Speaker 1: run and then a lot of things at work, and 425 00:21:22,119 --> 00:21:24,600 Speaker 1: I think that maybe making sure that you're really being 426 00:21:24,640 --> 00:21:27,520 Speaker 1: realistic about what can actually happen so that you can 427 00:21:27,800 --> 00:21:30,080 Speaker 1: achieve those things and then not feel bad that things 428 00:21:30,280 --> 00:21:33,639 Speaker 1: are piling up might be helpful. Yeah, Sarah's got on 429 00:21:33,680 --> 00:21:36,359 Speaker 1: this here says make a daily to do list and 430 00:21:36,480 --> 00:21:40,680 Speaker 1: do not allow yourself to put everything on there. I'm 431 00:21:40,680 --> 00:21:42,000 Speaker 1: sort of laughing at the idea of the to do 432 00:21:42,080 --> 00:21:44,879 Speaker 1: list that just says everything. Maybe I'll like take a 433 00:21:44,920 --> 00:21:47,360 Speaker 1: photo of that and put it on Instagram. I'm going say, 434 00:21:47,440 --> 00:21:51,880 Speaker 1: to do list everything, number one, everything because everything understand 435 00:21:51,920 --> 00:21:54,919 Speaker 1: all the things. Yes. One of my favorite sayings is 436 00:21:55,000 --> 00:21:57,199 Speaker 1: just there's no point putting something on a to do 437 00:21:57,280 --> 00:22:00,399 Speaker 1: list and then not doing it, like it's just is 438 00:22:00,480 --> 00:22:03,119 Speaker 1: not done, as if you'd never put it on the 439 00:22:03,160 --> 00:22:06,120 Speaker 1: list in the first place. Only now you feel bad, 440 00:22:06,680 --> 00:22:10,520 Speaker 1: So you've really gotten the worst of all outcomes. You 441 00:22:10,560 --> 00:22:14,320 Speaker 1: are so much better off setting very limited goals for 442 00:22:14,520 --> 00:22:17,920 Speaker 1: a day and then you get through those let's say 443 00:22:17,920 --> 00:22:20,760 Speaker 1: three things, five things, and you're on top of the 444 00:22:20,760 --> 00:22:23,040 Speaker 1: world because you did everything you said you were going 445 00:22:23,080 --> 00:22:25,760 Speaker 1: to And of course there's other things in the world 446 00:22:25,840 --> 00:22:28,119 Speaker 1: you could be doing. But again, if you're not going 447 00:22:28,200 --> 00:22:30,920 Speaker 1: to do them like it doesn't help to set yourself 448 00:22:31,000 --> 00:22:34,200 Speaker 1: up for failure. So be very strategic, like what three 449 00:22:34,200 --> 00:22:36,879 Speaker 1: things if the power went out in your office, like, 450 00:22:36,920 --> 00:22:39,359 Speaker 1: would you have had to get through in the course 451 00:22:39,440 --> 00:22:43,000 Speaker 1: of the day, and do those? Celebrate You can always 452 00:22:43,000 --> 00:22:45,200 Speaker 1: go find other stuff to do if you have more time. 453 00:22:45,760 --> 00:22:48,520 Speaker 1: But if you're doing three things a day, that's fifteen 454 00:22:48,560 --> 00:22:50,720 Speaker 1: things per work week, or twelve in her case if 455 00:22:50,720 --> 00:22:53,400 Speaker 1: she's got the four day week, but twelve things a week. 456 00:22:53,440 --> 00:22:55,399 Speaker 1: You know, in fifty weeks a year, that's six hundred 457 00:22:55,520 --> 00:22:58,560 Speaker 1: important things. So it's a fair amount of stuff. We 458 00:22:58,680 --> 00:23:02,399 Speaker 1: just make small, steady progress. And Sarah also suggested we 459 00:23:02,400 --> 00:23:04,520 Speaker 1: should savor the little moments of peace. What do you 460 00:23:04,560 --> 00:23:07,520 Speaker 1: mean by that? Yeah, just you know, even when things 461 00:23:07,520 --> 00:23:09,560 Speaker 1: are hard, you have this nice one hour commute, So 462 00:23:10,160 --> 00:23:12,199 Speaker 1: do the best that you can to shut off that 463 00:23:12,280 --> 00:23:14,000 Speaker 1: narrative in your head of all the things you have 464 00:23:14,040 --> 00:23:15,760 Speaker 1: to do and realize that once you're stuck in the 465 00:23:15,800 --> 00:23:18,080 Speaker 1: car or stuck on a run or whatever, you might 466 00:23:18,119 --> 00:23:20,160 Speaker 1: as well just be in that moment. So a little 467 00:23:20,720 --> 00:23:23,960 Speaker 1: mindfulness exercise, I guess. But really like, you're not gaining 468 00:23:24,000 --> 00:23:27,359 Speaker 1: anything from ruminating, so let yourself enjoy that audiobook or 469 00:23:27,359 --> 00:23:30,600 Speaker 1: that podcast or that music or whatever whatever you're doing. 470 00:23:30,640 --> 00:23:32,480 Speaker 1: And I know that's so much easier said than done. 471 00:23:32,600 --> 00:23:34,399 Speaker 1: I don't know that I can ever place get to 472 00:23:34,440 --> 00:23:39,520 Speaker 1: a place at zen while pumping caample No, but it 473 00:23:39,520 --> 00:23:41,360 Speaker 1: sounds like at least some other moments in the day 474 00:23:41,359 --> 00:23:44,560 Speaker 1: when maybe there's hope. So yeah, I think changing that 475 00:23:44,680 --> 00:23:48,400 Speaker 1: narrative is so important that we can go through these 476 00:23:48,400 --> 00:23:51,760 Speaker 1: crunch times. And in her case, I mean, things will 477 00:23:51,800 --> 00:23:57,760 Speaker 1: probably look different in six months, definitely in twelve months 478 00:23:57,480 --> 00:24:00,679 Speaker 1: as she comes out of that pumping stage, you know, 479 00:24:00,760 --> 00:24:04,120 Speaker 1: in two years when the baby is two and a half. 480 00:24:04,160 --> 00:24:06,920 Speaker 1: I mean, it's just everything will start to look different 481 00:24:07,000 --> 00:24:11,360 Speaker 1: as the kids get older, and so recognizing that can 482 00:24:11,440 --> 00:24:15,119 Speaker 1: sometimes help us say that, Okay, well, yes this is 483 00:24:15,400 --> 00:24:20,000 Speaker 1: tough now, but if I feel behind now, I will 484 00:24:20,040 --> 00:24:23,880 Speaker 1: not always feel behind, and there will be a time 485 00:24:23,920 --> 00:24:26,320 Speaker 1: when I am sleeping through the night, and there will 486 00:24:26,320 --> 00:24:28,639 Speaker 1: be a time when I am not hooked up to 487 00:24:28,720 --> 00:24:32,360 Speaker 1: a milking machine, and the five am run group will 488 00:24:32,480 --> 00:24:35,400 Speaker 1: will happily accept you back if you take it, if 489 00:24:35,400 --> 00:24:38,440 Speaker 1: you take a break or no. I mean, I think 490 00:24:38,440 --> 00:24:40,560 Speaker 1: if we do it like twice a week instead of 491 00:24:40,560 --> 00:24:42,760 Speaker 1: four times a week or something. I think it's amazing 492 00:24:42,800 --> 00:24:44,800 Speaker 1: what this person is doing. And this person really is 493 00:24:45,440 --> 00:24:48,040 Speaker 1: like in the thick of it, it sounds really hard, 494 00:24:48,200 --> 00:24:51,920 Speaker 1: like it's this is not one where we're just saying 495 00:24:51,920 --> 00:24:54,320 Speaker 1: buck up, everything's fine. You should be sailing through this 496 00:24:54,440 --> 00:24:56,960 Speaker 1: like we get it. Yeah, this actually is. This is 497 00:24:56,960 --> 00:25:00,920 Speaker 1: a tough time, but it's not going to last for ever. No, exactly. Well, 498 00:25:00,960 --> 00:25:02,560 Speaker 1: on that note, I think this is going to be 499 00:25:02,560 --> 00:25:05,520 Speaker 1: a short episode. Should we we go to our our 500 00:25:05,560 --> 00:25:07,800 Speaker 1: love of the way, Yes, all right, let's do it, 501 00:25:08,240 --> 00:25:11,440 Speaker 1: all right. So yeah, I'm in like in a wardrobe 502 00:25:11,520 --> 00:25:13,159 Speaker 1: upgrade mode, I guess, because all of a sudden I 503 00:25:13,240 --> 00:25:14,919 Speaker 1: just like looked around and was like, oh, all my 504 00:25:15,000 --> 00:25:17,200 Speaker 1: stuff I bought in like twenty seventeen or something. I 505 00:25:17,240 --> 00:25:18,920 Speaker 1: don't know. I was looking at my shoes, and I 506 00:25:18,960 --> 00:25:22,040 Speaker 1: was realizing I have three pairs of Colhon shoes that 507 00:25:22,080 --> 00:25:25,080 Speaker 1: have been just workhorses the last three years, and I 508 00:25:25,160 --> 00:25:28,000 Speaker 1: feel like that's pretty good for like heels. They're still 509 00:25:28,000 --> 00:25:30,840 Speaker 1: really comfortable. They're starting to look a little bit older. 510 00:25:30,840 --> 00:25:32,400 Speaker 1: I'm wondering if I should maybe see if I could 511 00:25:32,400 --> 00:25:34,800 Speaker 1: get them like professionally cleaned or something. Oh, that's you know, 512 00:25:34,880 --> 00:25:37,960 Speaker 1: that's a good idea. And you can get stuff resold too. Yeah, 513 00:25:38,040 --> 00:25:40,600 Speaker 1: the soles are actually like shockingly not even doing that 514 00:25:40,640 --> 00:25:44,320 Speaker 1: badly like they're they're they're making it. So Yeah, I 515 00:25:44,320 --> 00:25:47,200 Speaker 1: wanted to give them a shout out. And also super 516 00:25:47,200 --> 00:25:49,919 Speaker 1: comfortable for heels. Okay, I might have to pick up 517 00:25:49,960 --> 00:25:53,240 Speaker 1: a pair that sounds I'm always looking for comfortable shoes 518 00:25:53,280 --> 00:25:57,680 Speaker 1: I have. I have aerosols sort of nude colored pumps 519 00:25:58,200 --> 00:26:01,359 Speaker 1: and different some are a little higher than others, but 520 00:26:01,359 --> 00:26:04,320 Speaker 1: they're all very comfortable, and so I can wear them 521 00:26:04,400 --> 00:26:07,000 Speaker 1: on stage and look like I'm wearing serious heels but 522 00:26:07,680 --> 00:26:11,760 Speaker 1: still feel like I can walk, which I enjoy as 523 00:26:11,840 --> 00:26:16,000 Speaker 1: a as a thing. Walking as a thing as a thing. No, 524 00:26:16,080 --> 00:26:19,600 Speaker 1: walking is important. Walking walking is definitely important. Yeah, I've 525 00:26:19,600 --> 00:26:22,359 Speaker 1: had I've had this sort of shoe issue right now, 526 00:26:22,720 --> 00:26:28,080 Speaker 1: in that it's cold. We're recording this pretty baby. None 527 00:26:28,080 --> 00:26:31,720 Speaker 1: of my boots like fit. They my legs are swollen. 528 00:26:32,160 --> 00:26:37,160 Speaker 1: I can't get them up around my cat. It's really bad. 529 00:26:37,680 --> 00:26:40,280 Speaker 1: Did you have that every time? No? No, no no, no, 530 00:26:40,359 --> 00:26:43,040 Speaker 1: why it seems worse. It's an over forty symptoms. If 531 00:26:43,080 --> 00:26:46,480 Speaker 1: it's over forty sometimes, I mean others. My blood pressure 532 00:26:46,520 --> 00:26:48,200 Speaker 1: is normal. It's not like I've got, you know, any 533 00:26:48,240 --> 00:26:53,040 Speaker 1: issues with that. But whatever reason, I am swollen lower extremities. 534 00:26:53,840 --> 00:26:56,560 Speaker 1: It's such annoying. I remember that feeling. I don't like it. 535 00:26:56,640 --> 00:27:00,680 Speaker 1: I don't. Yeah, well, so I'm also ring on pull 536 00:27:00,800 --> 00:27:04,520 Speaker 1: I'm wearing pull on shoes and it's winter like, so 537 00:27:04,720 --> 00:27:08,240 Speaker 1: I'm in my like, oh yeah, you can't just throw 538 00:27:08,240 --> 00:27:12,320 Speaker 1: on some like birkenstocks. Yeah, bit my flats with no socks, 539 00:27:12,480 --> 00:27:15,800 Speaker 1: and then it's my feet are cold. So we'll just 540 00:27:16,119 --> 00:27:20,200 Speaker 1: maybe you need some like really cheap ankle boots, cheap 541 00:27:20,280 --> 00:27:25,359 Speaker 1: some big shoes for a different dump afterwards. But my 542 00:27:25,480 --> 00:27:28,000 Speaker 1: love of the week is going to be a newborn clothes. 543 00:27:28,520 --> 00:27:32,000 Speaker 1: I had stored a bunch of them in my closet, 544 00:27:32,119 --> 00:27:35,359 Speaker 1: like in a drawer in my closet. Post alex and 545 00:27:36,560 --> 00:27:40,600 Speaker 1: worn are unworn. Well, I mean they'd been washed like 546 00:27:40,640 --> 00:27:43,320 Speaker 1: they were okay, they were Alexes. Yeah, they're Alex's and 547 00:27:43,600 --> 00:27:46,280 Speaker 1: many of them had then been Sam's and Jaspers prior 548 00:27:46,320 --> 00:27:49,119 Speaker 1: to that. But I pulled them out and you know, 549 00:27:49,160 --> 00:27:52,040 Speaker 1: we're washing them in the in the newborn wash stuff 550 00:27:52,119 --> 00:27:54,080 Speaker 1: right now, so they're ready to go. And they're just 551 00:27:54,160 --> 00:27:58,679 Speaker 1: so cute. Right there's these little tiny things that the 552 00:27:58,720 --> 00:28:03,200 Speaker 1: little feet seas and they are tiny there, worns are 553 00:28:03,440 --> 00:28:08,240 Speaker 1: so small you whatever to three months. It's just I 554 00:28:08,240 --> 00:28:12,480 Speaker 1: mean it's adorable and I you know, I say this stuff, 555 00:28:13,119 --> 00:28:17,440 Speaker 1: but partly they get so little use because the kids, yeah, 556 00:28:17,440 --> 00:28:20,399 Speaker 1: they stay in really good sheep and the newborn sized 557 00:28:20,400 --> 00:28:22,960 Speaker 1: ones those last two weeks, yeah, three to six months, 558 00:28:22,960 --> 00:28:24,560 Speaker 1: like you get used out of that, Like the kid 559 00:28:24,560 --> 00:28:27,359 Speaker 1: will wear that from what six weeks on, but the 560 00:28:27,400 --> 00:28:30,000 Speaker 1: new board you really only have a handful of weeks 561 00:28:30,000 --> 00:28:33,480 Speaker 1: before they're too big for it, almost like days days. 562 00:28:34,040 --> 00:28:36,600 Speaker 1: But yeah, it's like a little doll clothes and you know, 563 00:28:36,680 --> 00:28:40,120 Speaker 1: so I've been enjoying seeing them, reminiscing about seeing the 564 00:28:40,160 --> 00:28:44,200 Speaker 1: other boys wearing those those clothes, and it's so if 565 00:28:44,240 --> 00:28:47,040 Speaker 1: everyone's tired of us being like in the past. By 566 00:28:47,080 --> 00:28:50,120 Speaker 1: the way, I think this is the last episode where 567 00:28:50,480 --> 00:28:55,600 Speaker 1: you will be hearing blasts from the previous from maybe past. Actually, 568 00:28:55,680 --> 00:28:57,960 Speaker 1: if all goes as planned, you may have already heard 569 00:28:58,000 --> 00:29:02,320 Speaker 1: an update. Yeah that's true. Our recording last future episodes 570 00:29:02,360 --> 00:29:05,240 Speaker 1: after this will be recorded later. So yeah, so all good. 571 00:29:05,480 --> 00:29:08,280 Speaker 1: Get excited about that, all right? Well, this has been 572 00:29:08,520 --> 00:29:11,480 Speaker 1: Best of Both Worlds. Episode one thirty one airing in 573 00:29:11,520 --> 00:29:14,320 Speaker 1: early February, talking about getting caught up when you want 574 00:29:14,360 --> 00:29:17,840 Speaker 1: to stop time. And since we were recording at nine 575 00:29:17,880 --> 00:29:20,600 Speaker 1: pm and Sarah has informed me we were never doing 576 00:29:20,640 --> 00:29:23,960 Speaker 1: this again, you would think I was the one who 577 00:29:24,000 --> 00:29:28,880 Speaker 1: was like thirty million weeks pregnant, but nope. We will 578 00:29:29,160 --> 00:29:32,280 Speaker 1: sign off on this and we'll record at more normal 579 00:29:32,320 --> 00:29:35,560 Speaker 1: times in the future. So anyway, this has been best 580 00:29:35,560 --> 00:29:37,240 Speaker 1: of Both Worlds. We'll be back next week with more 581 00:29:37,280 --> 00:29:41,440 Speaker 1: on making work in life fit together. Thanks for listening. 582 00:29:41,680 --> 00:29:44,720 Speaker 1: You can find me Sarah at the shoebox dot com 583 00:29:44,920 --> 00:29:48,680 Speaker 1: or at the Underscore Shoebox on Instagram, and you can 584 00:29:48,680 --> 00:29:52,959 Speaker 1: find me Laura at Laura vandercam dot com. This has 585 00:29:53,000 --> 00:29:56,280 Speaker 1: been the best of Both Worlds podcasts. Please join us 586 00:29:56,320 --> 00:29:59,720 Speaker 1: next time for more on making work and life work together.