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Speaker 1: Welcome to j dot M, a production of I Heart Radio. Hello,

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Speaker 1: Everything Bad? How are you doing? Welcome to Jay dot

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Speaker 1: IL the podcast. I'm here with my sister friends Lah

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Speaker 1: st Clair Hello, and Agia Grad and Danceller Hello. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: My name is Joe Scott, and today we're talking about

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Speaker 1: having support support systems because can't nobody do it by themselves?

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Speaker 1: God darn it, nobody nowhere, not ever. No, I'm telling

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Speaker 1: you right now, I'm so grateful for my best friend

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Speaker 1: in the world. We have been friends for who how

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Speaker 1: old am my name for? We've been friends for forty

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Speaker 1: seven years? Yeah, I know right, she still looks twelve

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Speaker 1: though she looks twelve. Shout out to her jeans. But

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Speaker 1: my my best friend of moment for being beautiful when

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Speaker 1: you know somebody, since you were small, since your foundation.

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Speaker 1: That's beautiful, isn't it? Older? Yes, isn't it. I'm super

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Speaker 1: blessed man for because she really doesn't care about what

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Speaker 1: I'm doing. She only cares about how I'm doing. Come on, yeah,

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Speaker 1: that kind of love. You know, I don't care you

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Speaker 1: wanna you wanna what? Oh? That's cool, You're going to

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Speaker 1: see who? That's what's up? Anyway? So right, how's right?

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Speaker 1: How's your how's your head is right? How's your head

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Speaker 1: in your heart? Are you feeling all right? You know,

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Speaker 1: is anything like scary to you? Or are you? Are

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Speaker 1: you at peace with stuff in your life? You know?

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Speaker 1: That's that is what matters, really, really, really, I love

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Speaker 1: that kind of support. I you guys have that kind

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Speaker 1: of support. Yeah, I feel like, for the most part

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Speaker 1: in my life, I can never look back and say

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Speaker 1: nobody supported me. If I did that, I would literally

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Speaker 1: probably be drawn and quartered by the dozens of people

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Speaker 1: who have had my back over the years. So I

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Speaker 1: I can. I can honestly say that there has always

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Speaker 1: been a good amount of support in my life, from

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Speaker 1: family to professionally, to my friends and things of that nature.

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Speaker 1: So I really should be further along in life that way.

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Speaker 1: I can just kind of hold no, seriously, I I

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Speaker 1: can actually hold myself accountable for the ways in which

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Speaker 1: I've not moved forward because it is definitely not because

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Speaker 1: of lack of support. Gang, which is probably why I

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Speaker 1: pile on so many responsibilities because I think I can

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Speaker 1: handle it. But yeah, I've had a best friend since

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Speaker 1: since birth. We like to joke and say we've been

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Speaker 1: friends since birth because our mothers were best friends in school.

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Speaker 1: So our mothers knew each other when they were thirteen,

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Speaker 1: and then they grew up and grown and they had us.

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Speaker 1: And her mother is the first name in my baby book.

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Speaker 1: Her mother was the first gift I received, and then

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Speaker 1: she gifted me with her bestie. Look at that I was.

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Speaker 1: I was sitting here listening to y'all y'all talking, I

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Speaker 1: was thinking, I think I have a whole polyamorous support

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Speaker 1: life system. When it comes to like you have the

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Speaker 1: foundation of your parents. However, I've always had whatever they

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Speaker 1: whatever that they could not feel. There's always been something

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Speaker 1: for that, and I'm grateful in that sense. And then

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Speaker 1: life continues in that way, right like if you continue

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Speaker 1: to leave your life that way, that means that it's

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Speaker 1: and you never let people go unless they have harmed

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Speaker 1: you and done wrong. Always have these gaps where people

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Speaker 1: just feel, these gaps that you need, you know what

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Speaker 1: I mean. It's very interesting from a mentorship situation. I

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Speaker 1: got mentors in my life, you know, because my parents

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Speaker 1: weren't didn't come from necessarily the business that I'm in,

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Speaker 1: and to to physical I got medical support in my life.

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Speaker 1: I got doctors and field gaps, you know what I mean.

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Speaker 1: Just I feel like life physically, in career wise, I

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Speaker 1: would be no body if not for the support around me.

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Speaker 1: I really feel like that. Yeah, it keeps you, It

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Speaker 1: keeps you grounded because you know, a lot of people

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Speaker 1: I don't know, I won't say a lot of people,

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Speaker 1: but some people really feel like they're islands, you know,

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Speaker 1: like they've done it all by themselves. But it's it's

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Speaker 1: like it's like the film industry for me, like when

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Speaker 1: you walk in, if the camera people don't show up,

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Speaker 1: what is why are you there? What it is? Where?

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Speaker 1: If if the lighting people, if the lighting folks aren't there,

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Speaker 1: you know before from the janitorial proof right there, if

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Speaker 1: it wasn't for the team, if your child care provider

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Speaker 1: don't show up on time. Girls, it's all these things.

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Speaker 1: But I do think that there's a lot to be

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Speaker 1: said about tribe building, you know. I think, yeah, everybody,

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Speaker 1: he can, everybody can kind of speak to the benefits

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Speaker 1: of having support, but it's it's it's a little more

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Speaker 1: intentional I think sometimes, and we give ourselves credit for that.

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Speaker 1: You may start out in a situation like having a

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Speaker 1: certain kind of you know parent situation, or you might

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Speaker 1: stumble upon a friend and you guys connect. But as

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Speaker 1: you get older, you start to be a little bit

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Speaker 1: more intentional about how you build your supports. And I

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Speaker 1: have to say that's something that I've had to learn

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Speaker 1: is i've gotten older. It's just how to open that up.

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Speaker 1: Because sometimes you can find yourself a situation where you

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Speaker 1: have a lot of people, but you may not have

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Speaker 1: the right people. Hey, you know what I mean, Or

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Speaker 1: you just have people to understand their limitations and their specialties.

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Speaker 1: It comes to point in your life when you also

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Speaker 1: have to understand about the people around you, Like, all right, now,

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Speaker 1: I know that I can't talk to this person about

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Speaker 1: building a beautiful relationship, however, and I know this person

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Speaker 1: loves me, and I can talk to them about other things. Man,

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Speaker 1: even with having it's about using and I don't know,

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Speaker 1: utilizing the same deal. You know, the people that that

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Speaker 1: you have around you in the right ways. Yeah, that's

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Speaker 1: us all, Yeah, absolutely, Because I think what happens is

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Speaker 1: that if you're if you're maintaining relationships and nurturing those relationships,

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Speaker 1: then they take on different things at different times in

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Speaker 1: your life, you know what I mean? I always like

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Speaker 1: to um, and we talked about this a couple of

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Speaker 1: times on the show. UM maybe we did or not.

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Speaker 1: I don't even remember. Maybe we did offline, but I

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Speaker 1: just remember an interaction that I had with Jill early

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Speaker 1: on that was like super nurturing. Like I was at

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Speaker 1: the Lily in New York and my boobs were about

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Speaker 1: to explode because I had left my child for the

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Speaker 1: night and I had milk. The milk was like my

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Speaker 1: boobs were like rocks and they were hurting, and I

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Speaker 1: had like to hide in another part of the club

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Speaker 1: and Jill was in there and I was just like,

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Speaker 1: might to turn to night, this might baby, and like

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Speaker 1: she was like oh, And I was like, I started

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Speaker 1: crying and I will never forget this. I don't you

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Speaker 1: probably don't even remember, but you started crying with me.

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Speaker 1: I'll never forget that. I was like, and we knew

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Speaker 1: each other, but we didn't like no know each other,

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Speaker 1: Like we knew each other, but we weren't like friends

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Speaker 1: at that point. We just kind of knew each other

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Speaker 1: from around and I was just like, yo, this is

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Speaker 1: the set in a nightclub with me and cry with

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Speaker 1: me about my baby. And that always made me understand

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Speaker 1: that there was just a certain space that you will

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Speaker 1: always kind of occupy and even you know, and you

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Speaker 1: just have always kind of been that person. So I

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Speaker 1: was like, even so like sometimes people start out at

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Speaker 1: a certain place and you think it's one thing, and

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Speaker 1: then because that that that relationship is nurtured and cared

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Speaker 1: for throughout the years, it becomes other things as you

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Speaker 1: move down the pike. So I think sometimes we just

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Speaker 1: have to be patient, and I understand that people can

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Speaker 1: play so many different roles in our lives and we

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Speaker 1: just don't even know what what role they're gonna play.

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Speaker 1: It's gotta be open to the way that we like

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Speaker 1: care for certain things and that and that gets tricky

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Speaker 1: because again me and Jill were talking about this offline,

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Speaker 1: knowing exactly when people don't fit. They might start out

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Speaker 1: as a person that you think, Okay, this is cool,

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Speaker 1: and then you get to a certain point and you're like,

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Speaker 1: oh wow, time for the audit. Yeah, it's time about

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Speaker 1: the situation. Maybe this is not working, you know what

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Speaker 1: I mean. It's just it's it's interesting how that happens.

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Speaker 1: And really, at the age that we are and we're

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Speaker 1: looking at each of us twenty five plus years and

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Speaker 1: whatever the work that we've done, you know, twenty five

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Speaker 1: plus years being adults, you know, and we know some

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Speaker 1: things that we didn't know when we were young and

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Speaker 1: when we started our tribe building back in the day.

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Speaker 1: So now we're looking at the situation like when we

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Speaker 1: started this tribe, girl, and I'm grateful this tribe has lasted. Yes,

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Speaker 1: this thing has lasted a lot, doesn't, So let's let's separate.

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Speaker 1: First of all, let me say that I do not

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Speaker 1: remember crying in the club. Did you did? But you

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Speaker 1: probably did. I probably did. Like there's nothing like I

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Speaker 1: don't have no babies, and that milk out like I'm

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Speaker 1: so sorry you hurt my teddy, hurt for yr titty

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Speaker 1: because and plus that I really wanted a baby. So

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Speaker 1: I was just like, uh, you know, I definitely know that.

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Speaker 1: So that's a part of it. I'm sure. Oh a job.

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Speaker 1: I'm hugging you from afar. Hugging you from afar. See

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Speaker 1: when you too good of somebody that lasts, when you,

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Speaker 1: when you, when you genuinely love on somebody, you don't

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Speaker 1: know what type of impact you make it on their life.

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Speaker 1: You just don't. That's why you do well. To people

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Speaker 1: because you don't even know how that's going to come

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Speaker 1: back for you later, you know what I'm saying, Like,

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Speaker 1: I just think that's that's some real you know, even

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Speaker 1: if we had never connected on another level, that would

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Speaker 1: have been significant to me regardless, you know what I'm saying.

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Speaker 1: So we're blessed. We're talking about support. But listen here,

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Speaker 1: let's let's let's do this thing in categories. Because you

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Speaker 1: got you've got support with friendships, and then you have

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Speaker 1: support in business. That's you know, because ultimately the support

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Speaker 1: you have in business, there are typically people that you're

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Speaker 1: paying or paying you. Yeah, right right, yeah, so that

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Speaker 1: complicates the support. Now it shows up that complicated support.

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Speaker 1: I'll say this about my executive assistant. Um, we've known

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Speaker 1: each other since we were in the fourth grade and yeah,

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Speaker 1: Alexi though, yeah, yeah, yeah. We went to Greenfield Elementary

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Speaker 1: together and we went to a girl's high together too. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Part of ways, Um, you know, life, people growing. And

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Speaker 1: we reconnected at a funeral and wow, that was oh god,

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Speaker 1: nineteen years ago. We reconnected at a funeral and she

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Speaker 1: was working in a hospice. You know, she was over it,

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Speaker 1: you know, because it's it's a very very hard job.

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Speaker 1: Shout out to everybody that works at a hospice, knowing

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Speaker 1: that all the good you do is ultimately gonna in

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Speaker 1: one way, just one You know that that takes a

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Speaker 1: lot of love and compassion. So she was telling me

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Speaker 1: about her job and that she was just kind of

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Speaker 1: it was taxing spiritually and mentally and every every way

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Speaker 1: it was taxing. And um, I thought about it, and

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Speaker 1: I was like, Wow, she could take care of somebody,

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Speaker 1: you know that is on their way out to the

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Speaker 1: next place, Like, she could probably deal with my ass,

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Speaker 1: she could probably deal with me. And in the beginning

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Speaker 1: she she agreed, I love I love the way you

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Speaker 1: thought about that rocket. I mean, because there's a certain

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Speaker 1: level of compassion and kindness that that's involved, you know,

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Speaker 1: with with dealing with the artists too. So I was

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Speaker 1: like here on this moment, because I'm like, but Jil,

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Speaker 1: they're dying. You ain't got Yeah, but I'm still a person.

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Speaker 1: So I was like, maybe she could, you know, work

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Speaker 1: with me. So we started working together. At first, it

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Speaker 1: was uncomfortable because she kept saying she kept calling me

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Speaker 1: dear and honey, and I was like, ah, I don't,

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Speaker 1: I don't like it. I don't like this dear Hunt business,

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Speaker 1: but then I got used to it. I'm so glad

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Speaker 1: that we kind of just kept kept going because it

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Speaker 1: turns out now that we're the same age. But when

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Speaker 1: she calls me hunt or dear, now I feel so grounded,

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Speaker 1: no matter what situation we're in, if if we're on

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Speaker 1: a set or you know, on the in the stage

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Speaker 1: of any kind, when she says, are you okay, dear,

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Speaker 1: I feel loved. I feel considered. You know, you need

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Speaker 1: some mortar Hunt, you know. I'm like, it's it's so loving. Yes,

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Speaker 1: we have a business relationship and and um, you know,

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Speaker 1: ultimately there are checks to be signed by by me,

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Speaker 1: but to have her particular kind of energy, especially when

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Speaker 1: sometimes I feel like I'm out in the world by myself,

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Speaker 1: you know, like I'm out here by myself, you know,

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Speaker 1: everybody looking at me, but I'm by myself, or I'm

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Speaker 1: in here by myself, you know, just to have that

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Speaker 1: kind of support that is so considered, it's so considered

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Speaker 1: ring of me. It's like it's everything, like I really

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Speaker 1: don't go too many places, you know, with without her,

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Speaker 1: you know. And and then there's Lance you know, Lance

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Speaker 1: t um no, Philly all day. We've been together for

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Speaker 1: a long time. That's like a brother to me. I

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Speaker 1: love Lands with all of my heart. He's he doesn't

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Speaker 1: have a particular job. Lance's job is. His job is

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Speaker 1: like a guy Friday, Like I can ask Lands for

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Speaker 1: a zebra and a pickle and He'll be like, all right,

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Speaker 1: I'll be right back. You know, It's like and that's

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Speaker 1: and that's that's what Lance does. He go get me

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Speaker 1: a zebra and a pickle. You know, I don't. I

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Speaker 1: don't really like to go too many places without Lands either.

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Speaker 1: So like when choosing employees, your support your working support system,

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Speaker 1: you have to one choose people who are who can

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Speaker 1: actually do the job, you know, that are competent to

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Speaker 1: do the gig, and also care if you can find

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Speaker 1: somebody that cares about you, you know, as a human being,

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Speaker 1: that is everything in this big, bad world. Baby. You

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Speaker 1: know that that does take time. But it's also about connection.

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Speaker 1: You know. Alexis and I had known each other for

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Speaker 1: a long time and that was a part of it

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Speaker 1: which felt comfortable. Lance and I did not know each

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Speaker 1: other very well, and when I met him, he looked

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Speaker 1: he reminded me of my mother's ex husband, who I

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Speaker 1: did not like at all, So I was like, nah,

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Speaker 1: I ain't this dude. He looked like that agger, but

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Speaker 1: he's that Alexis formula could have went a total different way,

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Speaker 1: and a lot of people, I feel like in a

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Speaker 1: lot of artists and other people's lives. Sometimes it does

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Speaker 1: when you bring up somebody that, yeah, Alexis is my

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Speaker 1: dad has never done a job, she's my fifth assist.

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Speaker 1: Then what I mean, definitely, I definitely went through some

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Speaker 1: folk that I was like, why are you here? What

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Speaker 1: is your purpose? Because it's supersedes mine. You're right, it

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Speaker 1: could have gone the whole opposite way. Like even with

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Speaker 1: like assistance in the past, like I've not done well

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Speaker 1: with it, Like I multitask a lot, and sometimes I

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Speaker 1: don't leave anything for that person to do. I have

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Speaker 1: actually never really connected with another person in that particular

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Speaker 1: you know job. And also too, because I work with

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Speaker 1: my husband and we have such an intimate relationship, having

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Speaker 1: somebody around all the time sometimes feels like an intrusion.

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Speaker 1: I know that sounds wild, but that's that's something that

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Speaker 1: we've we struggle within the past in terms of having

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Speaker 1: somebody around all the time. So What typically happens is

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Speaker 1: that people kind of do multiple things. And we've had

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Speaker 1: some great support, you know, over the years with that,

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Speaker 1: maybe someone who was doing my hair, my hair stylist,

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Speaker 1: or my stylist Charles Gregory, and you know, people who

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Speaker 1: were just down for the crown, you know what i mean,

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Speaker 1: Like we we had things going on, and because you know,

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Speaker 1: we were always working on like these small budgets and

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Speaker 1: we were always working from the muscle, it always really

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Speaker 1: did us a great deal of service to have professionally

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Speaker 1: people around who believed in what you were doing, but

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Speaker 1: that have multiple talents that yeah, like willing to like

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Speaker 1: one minute they were like helping you pick out clothes.

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Speaker 1: In the next minute they're running the merchandise table, you know,

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Speaker 1: and that that that is fortunate and unfortunate, but it's

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Speaker 1: like when you have that hustle mentality. And one thing

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Speaker 1: I've always loved about Philly is that I've always come

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Speaker 1: in contact with people like this who they knew exactly,

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Speaker 1: They know exactly where your headspace is, they know what

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Speaker 1: needs to be done. They know it's five things that

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Speaker 1: need to be done and it's three people, and we

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Speaker 1: don't have time to be worried about that. So I

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Speaker 1: think that you know, being specific about like what your

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Speaker 1: needs are really helps you to kind of curate your space.

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Speaker 1: When you're lucky enough, Sometimes some people just come around

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Speaker 1: and they know how to jump in there. But when

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Speaker 1: you're really trying to decide or really think about what

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Speaker 1: kind of professional help you need and support you need,

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Speaker 1: it's great when people can do a lot and they

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Speaker 1: don't mind and they're ready, we'll be back after their break.

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Speaker 1: You know whose relationship I always found fascinating and admirable

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Speaker 1: just from what I know, because mind you, I do

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Speaker 1: not know these two men individually are all they're they're

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Speaker 1: totally celebrities and very rich men. But Maverick Carter and

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Speaker 1: Lebron James, let's talk about that relationship with best friends

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Speaker 1: when you brought together one of you is really excelling

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Speaker 1: and you want the other one to be with you,

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Speaker 1: and you even you even take the time out to

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Speaker 1: pay for that person's education the better to run your

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Speaker 1: business and then both the ship. Like I think that

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Speaker 1: is just the from from the outside looking and I'm like, yeah,

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Speaker 1: that's that's some beautiful friendship support ship right there. What

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Speaker 1: I'm saying, like we're making each other better as a

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Speaker 1: continuous making each other better situation, because Maverick Carter has

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Speaker 1: definitely added to Lebron's right. It's it's it's investment in

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Speaker 1: any other person, you know. But there's also got to

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Speaker 1: be a trust factor there that is beyond beyond, you know,

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Speaker 1: because so many times when people have money, you know,

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Speaker 1: when when they have money or they have celebrity or

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Speaker 1: they have influence, people can make assumptions about what they

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Speaker 1: should or shouldn't do in terms of support from that

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Speaker 1: end of things, So like we're we're here talking about

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Speaker 1: how others support us, but then people's expectations as to

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Speaker 1: how we should support them, you know, And so in

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Speaker 1: that situation, it's like, you know, not knowing the specifics

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Speaker 1: of their relationship, you have to at least deduce that

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Speaker 1: there's a great deal of trust. Yes everything I mean,

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Speaker 1: and even from Maverick side, knowing that you've got a

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Speaker 1: best friend that's rising it's probably gonna be a super millionaire,

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Speaker 1: and not just taking that for granted, but figuring out

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Speaker 1: how can I add to this brand? Like what can

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Speaker 1: I bring like boom, what can I bring to the

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Speaker 1: table right right, right? How can I become how can

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Speaker 1: I become a resource? Yes? That is that is a

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Speaker 1: support system. Dude. I ain't watch Space Jam yet, but

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Speaker 1: I know it's banging. But sometimes you actually see that

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Speaker 1: happen with people who are married to each other so

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Speaker 1: like and so not not me, I for team where

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Speaker 1: we do the same thing. But I'm talking about like,

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Speaker 1: you know, somebody like the lebron in some instances you

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Speaker 1: see that person be the wife. You know what I'm saying. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: like you know I would look at like that, like

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Speaker 1: like like what happened with Tracy Emmonds. M h Yeah.

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Speaker 1: So you know you have like your mate who comes

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Speaker 1: in there and just says, okay, listen, I see how

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Speaker 1: we can work this. It's lovely that you write these songs.

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00:21:08,840 --> 00:21:14,840
Speaker 1: That's let's produce some movies. Yeah, let's expand this brand.

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Speaker 1: So vision, So vision is important too, Yes, but that

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Speaker 1: only works when when the other person can do these things. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: when you can actually do these things, then yeah, that's great.

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Speaker 1: Or you have the drive to want to do these things.

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Speaker 1: Therefore you want to get whatever education that you need

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Speaker 1: to get to make you better. Right now, you know

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Speaker 1: what I mean? Right right? Yeah, out of here? If

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Speaker 1: you can't tell me what to do, then you can't

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Speaker 1: tell me what right. But if you can, okay, you can,

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Speaker 1: that's the that's the thing, right. I'm pretty sure that

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Speaker 1: Mavery didn't feel I hard to present, like strongly giving

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Speaker 1: his opinions on major money moves until he had something

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Speaker 1: under his beltil he got a certain education, until he

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Speaker 1: thinks he made this business dealing was like, all right, now,

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Speaker 1: I think I can say something. And and also knowing

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Speaker 1: your lane, like Lebron's lane at the time was basketball.

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Speaker 1: That's your lane. You kill that, you do that. I'm here,

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Speaker 1: rob Ryan, but I'm gonna learn about this money. So

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Speaker 1: not only will we not be broke, you know, or struggling,

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Speaker 1: but we're also going to be able to expand this

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Speaker 1: empire and diversify the empire. That's what's up. Listen, Sean

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Speaker 1: G and I have been together for a long, long,

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Speaker 1: long long time. Our friendship is really incredible. Our first

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Speaker 1: conversation is always how are we? How are we? You know?

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Speaker 1: That is the most important part. Not a lot of managers.

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Speaker 1: He's not a manager. He's really my my business partner.

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Speaker 1: But a lot of for won't grasp that I have

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Speaker 1: to live in order to create. They don't grasp it.

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Speaker 1: They're like, okay, so so what's the next thing. Okay,

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Speaker 1: we're about to do the next thing. And that is

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Speaker 1: one of the things that frustrated me most about this industry.

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Speaker 1: It was constant like Okay, what's next, what's next? On now,

385
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Speaker 1: we're gonna do what? What? What? And I was like,

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Speaker 1: I just don't live like that. I need to take

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Speaker 1: a walk, yo, Like I really need to go somewhere

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Speaker 1: and lay in the body of water, like you with

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00:23:27,160 --> 00:23:30,800
Speaker 1: it's so much. I feel crazy and overwhelmed, and and

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Speaker 1: it's making me not do something or not want to

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Speaker 1: do something that I really love doing. Where is the balance?

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Speaker 1: But everybody in your life, Jill, if you know, they're

393
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Speaker 1: all they've been there for over twenty years something with that,

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Speaker 1: you know what I mean? There's something you know I

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Speaker 1: thought I just thought about that. I was like, I

396
00:23:48,600 --> 00:23:51,800
Speaker 1: wonder how many times a celebrity manager has poached you

397
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Speaker 1: or celebrity this another person? I could be your assistant,

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Speaker 1: you know, you know what I mean. Like, but it's

399
00:23:57,720 --> 00:24:05,160
Speaker 1: value in the foundation you created. Interested because I understand

400
00:24:05,200 --> 00:24:08,800
Speaker 1: what makes me happy. You know what makes me joyful,

401
00:24:09,160 --> 00:24:12,480
Speaker 1: and I want the people around me to understand that too.

402
00:24:13,359 --> 00:24:16,159
Speaker 1: So it tickles me when I hear Alexis and Lands

403
00:24:16,359 --> 00:24:19,000
Speaker 1: fussing about what I'm not gonna like. She ain't gonna

404
00:24:19,080 --> 00:24:24,320
Speaker 1: like this ship. They just pusn't it cousin, and going

405
00:24:24,359 --> 00:24:26,199
Speaker 1: back and forth about it, and it just tickles me

406
00:24:26,280 --> 00:24:31,920
Speaker 1: so much because I feel so loved right and knowing

407
00:24:32,000 --> 00:24:34,360
Speaker 1: that they know two people that know, so yeah, let

408
00:24:34,359 --> 00:24:36,040
Speaker 1: them go ahead and figure it out, because either way

409
00:24:36,040 --> 00:24:40,159
Speaker 1: they're gonna be right. And when they don't know, and

410
00:24:40,200 --> 00:24:42,720
Speaker 1: when they don't know, because even after all of these years,

411
00:24:42,760 --> 00:24:46,119
Speaker 1: that happens too, I have to write a memo and

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Speaker 1: send Listen, I gotta communicate. I gotta let you know

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00:24:49,800 --> 00:24:52,520
Speaker 1: where I'm at because maybe something has changed. I don't

414
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Speaker 1: dig that anymore. You know, we're going through so many

415
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Speaker 1: different uh stages. You know, from a woman that I'm vegan,

416
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Speaker 1: next time Presbyterian, you know, next I'm only vegetarian. You

417
00:25:05,200 --> 00:25:08,000
Speaker 1: know what I mean? Just those simple things that are

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00:25:08,040 --> 00:25:11,200
Speaker 1: that are important for the people around you to work

419
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Speaker 1: to to know. So as you're as you're compiling your

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00:25:14,840 --> 00:25:18,640
Speaker 1: support system and business, you really have to remind yourself

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00:25:18,720 --> 00:25:22,760
Speaker 1: to communicate with your people where are you what do

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Speaker 1: you want? How do you want it? Because it changes

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Speaker 1: from you know, not the moment to moment, but it's

424
00:25:30,280 --> 00:25:32,399
Speaker 1: been a long time, you know, and if your if

425
00:25:32,440 --> 00:25:35,280
Speaker 1: your goal is longevity, if that's what you're trying to

426
00:25:35,320 --> 00:25:39,040
Speaker 1: get to, you know, a long career, then you have

427
00:25:39,160 --> 00:25:42,320
Speaker 1: to just be upfront about what it is that you want,

428
00:25:42,880 --> 00:25:46,280
Speaker 1: you know, that is that's the I think that's a

429
00:25:46,280 --> 00:25:49,000
Speaker 1: big part of the goal, you know. I think it's

430
00:25:49,040 --> 00:25:52,479
Speaker 1: interesting too because that that that professional support. And this

431
00:25:52,520 --> 00:25:56,159
Speaker 1: has been really key for me is my peers, you know,

432
00:25:56,240 --> 00:25:59,439
Speaker 1: having good relationships with my peers who really understand it,

433
00:25:59,560 --> 00:26:03,520
Speaker 1: like who work quote unquote for you. They can observe you,

434
00:26:03,560 --> 00:26:07,440
Speaker 1: but they're not living it. And one of the things

435
00:26:07,440 --> 00:26:10,840
Speaker 1: that's been really good is that opportunity to really have

436
00:26:11,040 --> 00:26:13,560
Speaker 1: peer support, you know, where they can kind of give

437
00:26:13,560 --> 00:26:16,640
Speaker 1: you advice, they can tell you what their experience is,

438
00:26:17,080 --> 00:26:19,880
Speaker 1: particularly if they're willing to be really truthful and transparent,

439
00:26:19,960 --> 00:26:21,840
Speaker 1: which I know that can be really difficult in this

440
00:26:22,000 --> 00:26:24,560
Speaker 1: business where people don't want to tell you, like you know,

441
00:26:24,560 --> 00:26:26,120
Speaker 1: I don't want to tell you how much they get paid.

442
00:26:26,119 --> 00:26:27,919
Speaker 1: They don't want to tell you what their experience was

443
00:26:27,960 --> 00:26:30,199
Speaker 1: with a certain thing, but when you do have a

444
00:26:30,200 --> 00:26:32,240
Speaker 1: good group of folks that's willing to be open with you,

445
00:26:32,359 --> 00:26:35,080
Speaker 1: it can really help you move forward. And I just

446
00:26:35,160 --> 00:26:38,160
Speaker 1: think you know that community is everything and that never

447
00:26:38,200 --> 00:26:40,280
Speaker 1: people want to ask about that some more. I was

448
00:26:40,280 --> 00:26:42,040
Speaker 1: about to say, Asia, can you expand on that because

449
00:26:42,200 --> 00:26:44,399
Speaker 1: you were living and working a musician in a different way,

450
00:26:44,440 --> 00:26:46,679
Speaker 1: and I think that people would like really benefit off

451
00:26:46,680 --> 00:26:51,440
Speaker 1: and hearing that y'all got a community like that. Oh yeah,

452
00:26:51,480 --> 00:26:53,880
Speaker 1: we do, and and that's one of the things that

453
00:26:54,000 --> 00:26:56,640
Speaker 1: I feel like even lends to how we all got started.

454
00:26:57,160 --> 00:26:59,800
Speaker 1: Because people I've been on panels before and they're like, well,

455
00:27:00,040 --> 00:27:02,120
Speaker 1: what advice do you give new artists. I was like, well,

456
00:27:02,240 --> 00:27:04,320
Speaker 1: I would say, your communities to your left and your right.

457
00:27:04,359 --> 00:27:06,640
Speaker 1: It's not above you. A lot of times people are

458
00:27:06,640 --> 00:27:08,840
Speaker 1: always looking for a person to give them an opportunity

459
00:27:08,880 --> 00:27:11,280
Speaker 1: and don't realize that the biggest opportunity is what they

460
00:27:11,280 --> 00:27:13,520
Speaker 1: can build with people who are common minded. And I

461
00:27:13,560 --> 00:27:15,320
Speaker 1: feel like that's the story of the way that a

462
00:27:15,320 --> 00:27:19,160
Speaker 1: lot of us got started. So yeah, this is how

463
00:27:19,200 --> 00:27:22,439
Speaker 1: we looked at each other as resources to one another

464
00:27:22,560 --> 00:27:25,240
Speaker 1: instead of oh, here's somebody's gonna give me an opportunity,

465
00:27:25,680 --> 00:27:28,080
Speaker 1: so when one person was in one place, they could

466
00:27:28,080 --> 00:27:30,560
Speaker 1: speak about the other person, but then they may have

467
00:27:30,720 --> 00:27:32,240
Speaker 1: gotten a deal and you can be like, oh, well,

468
00:27:32,320 --> 00:27:34,480
Speaker 1: this person wants to sign me, what do you think?

469
00:27:35,080 --> 00:27:37,119
Speaker 1: Or this is this is this tour I want to

470
00:27:37,160 --> 00:27:39,240
Speaker 1: go on. What do you think about this promoter? What

471
00:27:39,280 --> 00:27:41,160
Speaker 1: do you think about X, Y and Z? And I've

472
00:27:41,200 --> 00:27:43,800
Speaker 1: had different levels of those kind of conversations with other

473
00:27:43,920 --> 00:27:49,320
Speaker 1: artists on going up until literally today. So you know,

474
00:27:49,359 --> 00:27:50,760
Speaker 1: I have to shout out so many I mean I

475
00:27:50,800 --> 00:27:56,359
Speaker 1: could shout out so many artis recently, well recently recently,

476
00:27:56,840 --> 00:28:01,399
Speaker 1: I had an absolutely amazing app talk with Jane Baylor.

477
00:28:02,560 --> 00:28:05,560
Speaker 1: Gene Baylor called me and was like, listen, I had

478
00:28:05,600 --> 00:28:07,840
Speaker 1: these things on my mind and I've been observing how

479
00:28:07,880 --> 00:28:10,920
Speaker 1: you infanteen were moving, and I just wanted to share

480
00:28:11,000 --> 00:28:14,879
Speaker 1: some things with you. And she really shared not only

481
00:28:14,960 --> 00:28:17,600
Speaker 1: a vision that she felt would work with us, but

482
00:28:17,720 --> 00:28:20,320
Speaker 1: she just talked about what she saw and how she

483
00:28:20,400 --> 00:28:23,000
Speaker 1: saw us moving and how she, you know, how she

484
00:28:23,080 --> 00:28:25,720
Speaker 1: felt like we were doing. And I just appreciated it

485
00:28:25,800 --> 00:28:29,080
Speaker 1: so much because it gave me such a boost. And

486
00:28:29,119 --> 00:28:32,000
Speaker 1: it wasn't like I called her and asked her a question.

487
00:28:32,440 --> 00:28:35,800
Speaker 1: She just felt it on her heart and shared it,

488
00:28:36,119 --> 00:28:38,320
Speaker 1: and I have carried that with me. I even went

489
00:28:38,360 --> 00:28:42,720
Speaker 1: back to that conversation recently, and since I've done so

490
00:28:42,800 --> 00:28:46,240
Speaker 1: much that was on that list, and like I said that,

491
00:28:46,360 --> 00:28:49,600
Speaker 1: it was like real love mixed in with a professional

492
00:28:49,680 --> 00:28:53,120
Speaker 1: know how. So it's not even just that she loves me,

493
00:28:53,440 --> 00:28:56,080
Speaker 1: but that and she loves us, is that she does

494
00:28:56,160 --> 00:28:59,280
Speaker 1: this work and been doing this work for decades. So

495
00:28:59,320 --> 00:29:01,080
Speaker 1: it's like I can trust that what she's saying to

496
00:29:01,200 --> 00:29:04,520
Speaker 1: me has, you know, has wisdom behind it, you know

497
00:29:04,560 --> 00:29:08,280
Speaker 1: what I mean. Um. I had had a conversation with Fonte,

498
00:29:08,360 --> 00:29:10,560
Speaker 1: you know, when I was moving into the space of

499
00:29:10,600 --> 00:29:13,800
Speaker 1: doing podcasts and just kind of he was really really

500
00:29:13,840 --> 00:29:16,160
Speaker 1: helpful to me and trying to you know, just telling

501
00:29:16,160 --> 00:29:19,040
Speaker 1: me what to expect and you know, you know, and

502
00:29:19,120 --> 00:29:23,000
Speaker 1: that was really great, you know. Um. I've had conversations with,

503
00:29:23,760 --> 00:29:27,240
Speaker 1: oh gosh, so many people like around touring. I've had

504
00:29:27,800 --> 00:29:32,800
Speaker 1: conversation with Avery, with Lettacy, with our sign, you know,

505
00:29:33,040 --> 00:29:36,200
Speaker 1: and even when and let me just say this, when

506
00:29:36,240 --> 00:29:43,560
Speaker 1: my mother passed away, my peers were amazing. Okay, my

507
00:29:43,680 --> 00:29:47,600
Speaker 1: peers were amazing. People called, they checked, they did things

508
00:29:47,640 --> 00:29:50,560
Speaker 1: for me. You know all those things. So professionally, I

509
00:29:50,560 --> 00:29:53,640
Speaker 1: feel like in my life that my relationships with these people,

510
00:29:53,680 --> 00:29:55,920
Speaker 1: they all go back twenty years, they all go back,

511
00:29:56,400 --> 00:29:59,200
Speaker 1: you know, multiple decades, and so those things have been

512
00:29:59,280 --> 00:30:02,240
Speaker 1: a great support to me, not just professionally, but personally.

513
00:30:02,640 --> 00:30:06,240
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying, Well, just let me let

514
00:30:06,240 --> 00:30:09,840
Speaker 1: me tell you about your husband. Though now I'm sure

515
00:30:09,920 --> 00:30:13,840
Speaker 1: you I'm sure you know this. Of course, I don't

516
00:30:13,880 --> 00:30:16,160
Speaker 1: have nothing to do to think about for teen dans

517
00:30:16,280 --> 00:30:22,200
Speaker 1: like when your mom passed for teen made it a point,

518
00:30:22,240 --> 00:30:24,280
Speaker 1: and I know that I wasn't the only one on

519
00:30:24,320 --> 00:30:27,440
Speaker 1: that list. He made text He sent text messages to

520
00:30:27,520 --> 00:30:31,120
Speaker 1: let us know he did. He sent text messages to

521
00:30:31,200 --> 00:30:34,440
Speaker 1: let us know that you were in Yes, him, do

522
00:30:37,200 --> 00:30:40,120
Speaker 1: any kind of love and support you want to send

523
00:30:40,120 --> 00:30:44,560
Speaker 1: my wife right now? Send it any kinderon and and

524
00:30:44,640 --> 00:30:48,040
Speaker 1: he was, and he It has been my professional support,

525
00:30:49,440 --> 00:30:57,880
Speaker 1: having to do this whole thing with somebody. It's it's

526
00:30:58,040 --> 00:31:02,760
Speaker 1: it's been a major, major blessing. This is an industry

527
00:31:02,760 --> 00:31:07,160
Speaker 1: that has a language. When your person speaks your work

528
00:31:07,280 --> 00:31:13,280
Speaker 1: language is a major, major major plus. So I gotta

529
00:31:13,280 --> 00:31:15,960
Speaker 1: I gotta shout my husband out first and foremost, and

530
00:31:16,040 --> 00:31:18,760
Speaker 1: forgive me for you know, not doing that from the gate.

531
00:31:18,800 --> 00:31:22,200
Speaker 1: I'm so used to him. It's like I forget that.

532
00:31:22,200 --> 00:31:24,560
Speaker 1: That's like a thing, like I'm so used to it.

533
00:31:25,040 --> 00:31:28,320
Speaker 1: But but but working with him has been the best

534
00:31:28,480 --> 00:31:30,760
Speaker 1: bounce back and forth between the two of us this

535
00:31:31,000 --> 00:31:34,000
Speaker 1: entire time. You know, it can be hard, but it

536
00:31:34,040 --> 00:31:36,440
Speaker 1: has been by far more of a blessing than a

537
00:31:36,560 --> 00:31:41,920
Speaker 1: challenge by far. But that is rare, honestly, because most

538
00:31:41,920 --> 00:31:45,560
Speaker 1: people that are married, well yeah, most people that are

539
00:31:45,600 --> 00:31:48,880
Speaker 1: married in the you know, get into business together. That's

540
00:31:48,920 --> 00:31:52,200
Speaker 1: a tough road to toe. It's a real rough road

541
00:31:52,240 --> 00:31:55,800
Speaker 1: to toe. I mean it has it has a lot

542
00:31:55,920 --> 00:32:02,920
Speaker 1: for you, and it is worth for you know. Ah, well,

543
00:32:02,960 --> 00:32:07,200
Speaker 1: that's an interesting relationship, right Yance and jay Z thus far,

544
00:32:07,560 --> 00:32:15,240
Speaker 1: but that's also interesting. They're all interesting. Uh. Yes, there's

545
00:32:15,240 --> 00:32:19,320
Speaker 1: a trust factor. There is a trust factor. There's a

546
00:32:19,360 --> 00:32:22,320
Speaker 1: trust and a comfort and I think if you're going

547
00:32:22,360 --> 00:32:25,400
Speaker 1: to do business with your with your mate, those things

548
00:32:25,440 --> 00:32:27,640
Speaker 1: have to be in place. And I think it also

549
00:32:27,720 --> 00:32:29,800
Speaker 1: has to be a bit of a balance in between

550
00:32:29,800 --> 00:32:33,120
Speaker 1: who benefits from whom. I think sometimes when people come

551
00:32:33,120 --> 00:32:36,200
Speaker 1: into an established career as a mate and then they

552
00:32:36,240 --> 00:32:38,880
Speaker 1: become a business partner, It can be a lot trickier

553
00:32:38,920 --> 00:32:43,520
Speaker 1: than if people build something together. So so if you're yeah,

554
00:32:43,560 --> 00:32:45,720
Speaker 1: so if you're coming in, if you're coming into something

555
00:32:45,760 --> 00:32:49,880
Speaker 1: that's already established, obviously, that has all kinds of implications

556
00:32:49,920 --> 00:32:53,120
Speaker 1: that can become very difficult down the line. When you

557
00:32:53,160 --> 00:32:55,520
Speaker 1: build something together can be Yeah, but what the a

558
00:32:55,640 --> 00:32:58,239
Speaker 1: because you actually talked to at least Battery Simpson and

559
00:32:58,440 --> 00:33:01,080
Speaker 1: they might be the only other couple that may be

560
00:33:01,240 --> 00:33:03,960
Speaker 1: similar in that way. Did they ever say did she

561
00:33:03,960 --> 00:33:05,800
Speaker 1: ever say anythink to you about support in that way

562
00:33:05,800 --> 00:33:08,720
Speaker 1: and how they dealt with it? Yeah, I mean they

563
00:33:08,800 --> 00:33:13,280
Speaker 1: had an extreme amount of trust for one another. So

564
00:33:13,320 --> 00:33:15,520
Speaker 1: their story is really at the end of the day,

565
00:33:15,560 --> 00:33:19,440
Speaker 1: their story is actually really beautiful. He met Valerie Simpson

566
00:33:20,040 --> 00:33:24,640
Speaker 1: when he was homeless and or houseless is the word

567
00:33:24,680 --> 00:33:26,760
Speaker 1: the term now, but he's he was homeless at the

568
00:33:26,760 --> 00:33:28,800
Speaker 1: time and went into a church to get a meal

569
00:33:29,120 --> 00:33:31,040
Speaker 1: because it was like a suit kitchen in the church.

570
00:33:31,520 --> 00:33:33,960
Speaker 1: He went to get something to eat and in the

571
00:33:34,480 --> 00:33:38,719
Speaker 1: and she was practicing music in the sanctuary with several

572
00:33:38,720 --> 00:33:43,160
Speaker 1: other people, and he heard her and went into the sanctuary.

573
00:33:43,240 --> 00:33:49,440
Speaker 1: And that is how they met. And feel me like

574
00:33:49,560 --> 00:33:51,960
Speaker 1: saying you know, you hear a lot of things about

575
00:33:51,960 --> 00:33:55,080
Speaker 1: all their relationship that when I tell you that that

576
00:33:55,280 --> 00:34:01,560
Speaker 1: relationship creatively and personally was ordained. What happened between them

577
00:34:01,840 --> 00:34:06,760
Speaker 1: was something that you you want that and you want that,

578
00:34:07,000 --> 00:34:09,520
Speaker 1: not for the reasons that people think, like, you know,

579
00:34:09,760 --> 00:34:12,600
Speaker 1: not for he He would always say, you know, I'm

580
00:34:12,640 --> 00:34:14,400
Speaker 1: I'm here because I want to be, not because it's

581
00:34:14,440 --> 00:34:17,800
Speaker 1: a good picture. Listen, And they said tons of stuff

582
00:34:17,840 --> 00:34:20,680
Speaker 1: like that. They like they they are serious Jim Jim droppers.

583
00:34:21,040 --> 00:34:26,880
Speaker 1: But again that's how yeah, again, that's how they've met. Okay,

584
00:34:26,920 --> 00:34:32,560
Speaker 1: they became songwriting partners before they became lovers, So there

585
00:34:32,680 --> 00:34:36,759
Speaker 1: was a creative and business respect that they had for

586
00:34:36,840 --> 00:34:41,720
Speaker 1: one another that was already in their connection with one another.

587
00:34:42,400 --> 00:34:46,960
Speaker 1: So there was kids met, there was respect, there was trust,

588
00:34:47,480 --> 00:34:51,280
Speaker 1: there was kindness. There was all of that present before

589
00:34:51,320 --> 00:34:55,600
Speaker 1: they ever became lovers. And they were young, you know

590
00:34:55,640 --> 00:34:58,080
Speaker 1: what I'm saying, So there was a lot of that

591
00:34:58,280 --> 00:35:00,480
Speaker 1: president and they went through the Mode Town. I don't

592
00:35:00,480 --> 00:35:03,799
Speaker 1: know if people understand that they came into Motown as

593
00:35:04,160 --> 00:35:07,920
Speaker 1: as the new School. So when you had the Holland

594
00:35:07,920 --> 00:35:11,560
Speaker 1: Doja Hollands, they were the kings of Motown. They came

595
00:35:11,600 --> 00:35:16,440
Speaker 1: in as the young Bucks. So their business acumen and

596
00:35:16,480 --> 00:35:20,279
Speaker 1: what they learned and enduring after Motown had already been established.

597
00:35:20,719 --> 00:35:23,560
Speaker 1: They their whole story is really really interesting. So I

598
00:35:23,560 --> 00:35:25,520
Speaker 1: don't want to get too deep into it, but their

599
00:35:25,560 --> 00:35:28,920
Speaker 1: story was really interesting. So once they became a family,

600
00:35:29,960 --> 00:35:34,560
Speaker 1: they were already family, you know, and see stuff like

601
00:35:34,600 --> 00:35:36,520
Speaker 1: that makes us think it's possible. That's the bullshit. I'm

602
00:35:36,520 --> 00:35:41,320
Speaker 1: just joking, it is, you know, and and and and

603
00:35:41,360 --> 00:35:44,879
Speaker 1: as as they got older, they respected each other as individuals.

604
00:35:44,960 --> 00:35:46,640
Speaker 1: They gave each other space. There was a lot of

605
00:35:46,640 --> 00:35:51,200
Speaker 1: different things that happened within that. And again, the magic

606
00:35:51,360 --> 00:35:54,520
Speaker 1: of the music that they made together, the legacy of

607
00:35:54,560 --> 00:35:59,000
Speaker 1: that is just massive. Okay. And to the day that

608
00:35:59,040 --> 00:36:01,600
Speaker 1: he passed away, we went to she did a something

609
00:36:01,640 --> 00:36:05,640
Speaker 1: called history Makers, and Valerie Simpson said during history Makers,

610
00:36:05,640 --> 00:36:09,200
Speaker 1: and I'll never forget this, she was being interviewed and

611
00:36:09,280 --> 00:36:12,400
Speaker 1: she was asked this question and she got quiet and

612
00:36:12,480 --> 00:36:17,960
Speaker 1: she said, you know what, that's nixt question, And it

613
00:36:18,040 --> 00:36:20,239
Speaker 1: went over everybody's head in the moment. But I just

614
00:36:20,320 --> 00:36:24,680
Speaker 1: began to cry because I was like, I knew what

615
00:36:24,840 --> 00:36:28,560
Speaker 1: she meant. When people interview us, they're just certain things

616
00:36:28,560 --> 00:36:31,640
Speaker 1: I answer, and certain things he answers, and we're just

617
00:36:31,760 --> 00:36:34,400
Speaker 1: used to it because it's a rhythm, you know. And

618
00:36:34,440 --> 00:36:38,399
Speaker 1: then when when she was asked a question, she felt

619
00:36:38,400 --> 00:36:41,720
Speaker 1: out of place because she was like, that's Nick's question,

620
00:36:42,200 --> 00:36:46,800
Speaker 1: and he's not here to answer that question, and and

621
00:36:46,800 --> 00:36:50,359
Speaker 1: and and that you will never be able to tell

622
00:36:50,360 --> 00:36:53,080
Speaker 1: me nothing about Nick Ashford and Valerie Simpson as a

623
00:36:53,160 --> 00:36:57,279
Speaker 1: couple and as a team. That is the realist. This

624
00:36:57,520 --> 00:37:01,240
Speaker 1: is the realist. Excuse me, motherfucker is on the planet

625
00:37:01,560 --> 00:37:06,560
Speaker 1: for me. You can't tell me about that relationship. Like

626
00:37:06,600 --> 00:37:13,839
Speaker 1: that's the epitome of support of support connections, you know, don't.

627
00:37:14,080 --> 00:37:16,040
Speaker 1: I don't want to sound like you know, but it's

628
00:37:16,120 --> 00:37:28,000
Speaker 1: solid rock, a rock. That's so, it's just all right rock.

629
00:37:29,200 --> 00:37:32,479
Speaker 1: This love is that's what we got, Okay, honey, don't

630
00:37:33,080 --> 00:37:38,320
Speaker 1: that is so impressive. That is suching. That's like goals, girl.

631
00:37:38,400 --> 00:37:42,760
Speaker 1: Here's another. Here's another lyric via via Nick Ashford stand

632
00:37:42,840 --> 00:37:46,960
Speaker 1: by you. I stand by you like a tree and

633
00:37:47,719 --> 00:37:56,759
Speaker 1: trying to move me. M damn his words. Listen you

634
00:37:57,600 --> 00:38:00,640
Speaker 1: he said, he said, I know you would make a

635
00:38:00,719 --> 00:38:03,440
Speaker 1: man out of a soul that didn't have a goal.

636
00:38:06,800 --> 00:38:09,719
Speaker 1: Don't don't fall out the your age. Somebody better love

637
00:38:09,760 --> 00:38:12,120
Speaker 1: you that much. That's all I'm gonna say. Somebody better

638
00:38:12,120 --> 00:38:14,319
Speaker 1: love you that much a man and man. And that

639
00:38:14,440 --> 00:38:19,080
Speaker 1: ain't support and and trust and love and friendship. I

640
00:38:19,120 --> 00:38:22,600
Speaker 1: don't know what it is. It's so easy. It's so

641
00:38:22,640 --> 00:38:26,239
Speaker 1: easy for anybody, I would say, in life and in

642
00:38:26,320 --> 00:38:30,040
Speaker 1: business to get become bitter because some ship didn't work out.

643
00:38:31,560 --> 00:38:35,000
Speaker 1: It's it's very easy to do that. But there is

644
00:38:35,120 --> 00:38:38,080
Speaker 1: there is light. I swear to you, there is like

645
00:38:38,680 --> 00:38:43,280
Speaker 1: I'm I'm trying not to cry right now. Oh yeah,

646
00:38:43,320 --> 00:38:48,200
Speaker 1: that feel good. It feels so good if in comparison

647
00:38:48,280 --> 00:38:52,000
Speaker 1: to everything else. When you know it, it changes your

648
00:38:52,040 --> 00:39:00,440
Speaker 1: perspective and now you can't go for anything else anything. Yeah. Yeah,

649
00:39:01,000 --> 00:39:14,839
Speaker 1: more conversation after the break on the non romantic support thing.

650
00:39:14,920 --> 00:39:16,759
Speaker 1: I would just like to thank you ladies, because it's

651
00:39:16,800 --> 00:39:20,560
Speaker 1: interesting on this topic. Like I and my whole career

652
00:39:20,560 --> 00:39:22,960
Speaker 1: has been built on support. It's been built on support

653
00:39:23,040 --> 00:39:26,759
Speaker 1: of my friendships and my relationships with amazing people. And

654
00:39:26,760 --> 00:39:28,719
Speaker 1: it just so happened that most of these amazing people

655
00:39:28,760 --> 00:39:31,680
Speaker 1: I met when I moved to Philadelphia. So I look

656
00:39:31,719 --> 00:39:34,600
Speaker 1: at y'all and I'm like yeah. I mean it started

657
00:39:34,640 --> 00:39:37,839
Speaker 1: with one small little radio show about some soul musicot

658
00:39:37,880 --> 00:39:42,480
Speaker 1: Certiffany Bacon, you know what I mean. He's just going

659
00:39:42,520 --> 00:39:45,120
Speaker 1: to support my friend in Switzerland and running into this

660
00:39:45,200 --> 00:39:48,000
Speaker 1: amazing singer from from Philly who has this afro with

661
00:39:48,000 --> 00:39:50,719
Speaker 1: her new husband. Hey, jam, nice to meet you. But

662
00:39:50,760 --> 00:39:52,840
Speaker 1: then it just built into bigger things like Jill's got

663
00:39:52,920 --> 00:39:54,759
Speaker 1: a new brad, I'm get her on the radio show.

664
00:39:54,800 --> 00:39:57,480
Speaker 1: We gotta promote it. Like you know, Asian Patina doing

665
00:39:57,520 --> 00:39:59,680
Speaker 1: a baseball They're doing a whole baseball game and it's

666
00:39:59,680 --> 00:40:01,359
Speaker 1: gonna be need to the support of the community. Well

667
00:40:01,400 --> 00:40:04,680
Speaker 1: we need to. It's just it's all about my whole

668
00:40:04,760 --> 00:40:08,600
Speaker 1: life and career is I'm built on it and my

669
00:40:08,760 --> 00:40:11,160
Speaker 1: goal is to continue to put it out there too,

670
00:40:11,360 --> 00:40:14,160
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, Like it's a whole you.

671
00:40:13,440 --> 00:40:16,319
Speaker 1: You give it back, you see, that's what it's all about.

672
00:40:16,360 --> 00:40:19,680
Speaker 1: And see you give it back, and I just well, yeah,

673
00:40:19,719 --> 00:40:22,960
Speaker 1: you're deeply community minded. We love you so much. You're

674
00:40:23,000 --> 00:40:26,080
Speaker 1: deeply community minded. You are always trying to promote other

675
00:40:26,120 --> 00:40:29,080
Speaker 1: people and what they're doing and utilize your platforms to

676
00:40:29,400 --> 00:40:33,120
Speaker 1: do that. And that that's saying Cofa, that whole idea

677
00:40:33,200 --> 00:40:35,160
Speaker 1: of just kind of reaching back and making sure that

678
00:40:35,239 --> 00:40:37,719
Speaker 1: we take care of each other and all of that.

679
00:40:37,760 --> 00:40:41,120
Speaker 1: You you live by that, and and for women in this,

680
00:40:41,200 --> 00:40:44,919
Speaker 1: in this, in this industry, it says a lot and

681
00:40:44,920 --> 00:40:47,320
Speaker 1: and it speaks against a lot of the stereotypical vibes

682
00:40:47,320 --> 00:40:50,000
Speaker 1: that people say about the music industry and then particularly

683
00:40:50,000 --> 00:40:52,719
Speaker 1: about women in it. But girl, you live that, you

684
00:40:52,800 --> 00:40:55,480
Speaker 1: have always lived that. If I call you and say linny, X,

685
00:40:55,600 --> 00:40:57,920
Speaker 1: Y and Z, you're on it. But then before we

686
00:40:57,960 --> 00:41:00,359
Speaker 1: get off the phone, then you'll tell me, oh, well,

687
00:41:00,360 --> 00:41:03,359
Speaker 1: don't worry, don't forget about this person who you need

688
00:41:03,400 --> 00:41:05,600
Speaker 1: to try this or you need to you need to

689
00:41:05,640 --> 00:41:09,040
Speaker 1: look them up because they're doing this. Also, so as

690
00:41:09,080 --> 00:41:11,960
Speaker 1: you give your always your you know, I'll do this

691
00:41:12,000 --> 00:41:13,600
Speaker 1: for you, but I also want you to support this

692
00:41:13,680 --> 00:41:16,640
Speaker 1: other person. Rarely do you say I'll do this for

693
00:41:16,680 --> 00:41:19,200
Speaker 1: you if you do this for me. So I think

694
00:41:19,239 --> 00:41:22,160
Speaker 1: people really thinking about, you know, how to support each

695
00:41:22,200 --> 00:41:25,640
Speaker 1: other is also about thinking about it about the community

696
00:41:25,680 --> 00:41:27,480
Speaker 1: as a whole, you know what I mean. And I

697
00:41:27,520 --> 00:41:30,239
Speaker 1: don't want us to get off this conversation without discussing

698
00:41:30,280 --> 00:41:32,800
Speaker 1: that aspect of it. Because even if every time I

699
00:41:32,840 --> 00:41:34,840
Speaker 1: support you all. It really is for my people. Anyway,

700
00:41:34,920 --> 00:41:37,359
Speaker 1: at the end of the day, what is good for

701
00:41:37,400 --> 00:41:40,840
Speaker 1: my people, and y'all good for my people. So this

702
00:41:41,000 --> 00:41:44,719
Speaker 1: is so this is, it's all gonna win, win, win.

703
00:41:44,760 --> 00:41:48,759
Speaker 1: When this is such a joy, you know, it's such

704
00:41:48,760 --> 00:41:53,680
Speaker 1: a joint having YouTube. Oh god, I'm trying that that

705
00:41:53,840 --> 00:41:59,760
Speaker 1: al fucking this is the person who said she didn't

706
00:42:00,080 --> 00:42:02,840
Speaker 1: she didn't remember crying the club. I just want to

707
00:42:02,840 --> 00:42:06,080
Speaker 1: bring that back. I want to bring that part of

708
00:42:06,080 --> 00:42:09,160
Speaker 1: the story back. I think I think this is an

709
00:42:09,160 --> 00:42:13,200
Speaker 1: appropriate time to bring No. You know, I know I'm

710
00:42:13,239 --> 00:42:15,759
Speaker 1: a crier. I ain't tripping off of that at all.

711
00:42:16,360 --> 00:42:18,200
Speaker 1: I'm just I was just trying not to so I

712
00:42:18,200 --> 00:42:25,200
Speaker 1: could complete my dog one thought. I support privileged to

713
00:42:25,560 --> 00:42:28,840
Speaker 1: know you like you teach me so much about being

714
00:42:29,640 --> 00:42:32,080
Speaker 1: what I love. I really love being a human being.

715
00:42:32,239 --> 00:42:34,920
Speaker 1: I think it's awesome. It's so many ups and downs

716
00:42:34,920 --> 00:42:38,279
Speaker 1: in this thing. It's so much learning, is so much

717
00:42:38,360 --> 00:42:43,359
Speaker 1: learning and forgiving and re retrying. You know that re up.

718
00:42:43,640 --> 00:42:46,960
Speaker 1: You know, we're all end up doing that thing. And

719
00:42:47,000 --> 00:42:49,680
Speaker 1: I listened to you, and you just give me so

720
00:42:49,760 --> 00:42:54,600
Speaker 1: much inspiration and hope and information and guidance, and I

721
00:42:54,640 --> 00:42:57,719
Speaker 1: just thank you, thank you, thank you so much, thank

722
00:42:57,719 --> 00:43:03,080
Speaker 1: you so much much. Did the cycle we ever go on?

723
00:43:03,200 --> 00:43:10,920
Speaker 1: What is you saying? You know what? Yes? Yes? Tina

724
00:43:11,000 --> 00:43:14,360
Speaker 1: Ferris and I have this joke about us in the

725
00:43:14,440 --> 00:43:18,239
Speaker 1: future about what we'll be in, be a visa or

726
00:43:18,239 --> 00:43:21,040
Speaker 1: we'll be in somewhere in the south of France, like

727
00:43:21,280 --> 00:43:27,640
Speaker 1: remember that time, remember that time, Like we're gonna have

728
00:43:28,400 --> 00:43:33,040
Speaker 1: so many memories to share with each other because we've

729
00:43:33,280 --> 00:43:36,359
Speaker 1: you know, we've missed chunks of life together, but we've

730
00:43:36,400 --> 00:43:40,360
Speaker 1: also shared chunks of life together. And look that support

731
00:43:41,400 --> 00:43:44,200
Speaker 1: and friendship and you watch, you watch from the friends,

732
00:43:44,200 --> 00:43:48,520
Speaker 1: You're so excited for each other. I've watched many times

733
00:43:48,840 --> 00:43:52,120
Speaker 1: from you know, from the outside or just like you know,

734
00:43:52,239 --> 00:43:56,080
Speaker 1: just looking at you on television, or or or listening

735
00:43:56,120 --> 00:43:58,680
Speaker 1: to lie or or just knowing what was going on

736
00:43:58,719 --> 00:44:02,319
Speaker 1: in your life in just thinking yes, like giving you

737
00:44:02,360 --> 00:44:05,399
Speaker 1: the yes, like you don't even hear yeah, you don't

738
00:44:05,440 --> 00:44:08,839
Speaker 1: even hear the yes, but it's like a yes, like

739
00:44:08,920 --> 00:44:11,399
Speaker 1: this is this is that's what we came for, that's

740
00:44:11,400 --> 00:44:14,800
Speaker 1: what we came to do. That's how you do. You

741
00:44:14,920 --> 00:44:21,600
Speaker 1: better do it? Yeah, I cannot say this to you

742
00:44:21,760 --> 00:44:28,000
Speaker 1: that you don't leave about I'm proud of my little commercial.

743
00:44:28,080 --> 00:44:34,520
Speaker 1: I meant that commercial. I meant that how I meant it.

744
00:44:34,640 --> 00:44:37,000
Speaker 1: On my side, I thought the same thing when that

745
00:44:37,040 --> 00:44:46,520
Speaker 1: Walmart commercial came on. Sorry no shade, And I got

746
00:44:46,560 --> 00:44:50,480
Speaker 1: so many comings like that. But I let's say this too,

747
00:44:50,560 --> 00:44:52,320
Speaker 1: Like in the in the socials, in the world of

748
00:44:52,360 --> 00:44:55,560
Speaker 1: the socials, we had so many times where people be

749
00:44:55,560 --> 00:44:59,160
Speaker 1: talking about old I don't and nobody ain't gonna support you,

750
00:44:59,239 --> 00:45:01,319
Speaker 1: or the people closer to you're not gonna support you,

751
00:45:01,400 --> 00:45:03,480
Speaker 1: and this is that and the other. I just want

752
00:45:03,480 --> 00:45:06,360
Speaker 1: to be clear that that does not always happen, and

753
00:45:06,440 --> 00:45:09,040
Speaker 1: we don't have to accept that that is true. That

754
00:45:09,200 --> 00:45:12,040
Speaker 1: sometimes people may not support you in the way that

755
00:45:12,160 --> 00:45:16,040
Speaker 1: you think that they should at that moment, but you

756
00:45:16,200 --> 00:45:20,399
Speaker 1: have to be open to that there's always happening on

757
00:45:20,480 --> 00:45:23,399
Speaker 1: some level. Focus on the people who show up. Don't

758
00:45:23,400 --> 00:45:26,239
Speaker 1: focus on the people who don't. You focus on the

759
00:45:26,239 --> 00:45:28,839
Speaker 1: people who don't show up, and you're missing a lot

760
00:45:28,920 --> 00:45:31,920
Speaker 1: of support and you're not giving them the love that

761
00:45:32,000 --> 00:45:34,480
Speaker 1: they deserve when you're too focused on those people who

762
00:45:34,520 --> 00:45:38,200
Speaker 1: don't show up. And you know, and I just want

763
00:45:38,200 --> 00:45:40,080
Speaker 1: to just put that out there because I see a

764
00:45:40,120 --> 00:45:41,759
Speaker 1: lot of that on the internet you know what I mean,

765
00:45:41,800 --> 00:45:44,040
Speaker 1: or you didn't post my thing, or you didn't do this,

766
00:45:45,719 --> 00:45:48,799
Speaker 1: and it's like, look, listen, it's when you show up

767
00:45:48,840 --> 00:45:51,040
Speaker 1: in the right time and now. And I was telling

768
00:45:51,080 --> 00:45:55,480
Speaker 1: this story a million times over. It was a needed

769
00:45:55,600 --> 00:45:58,400
Speaker 1: and right time that my friend Jill hit me on

770
00:45:58,440 --> 00:45:59,960
Speaker 1: the phone and so I need you to do something

771
00:46:00,000 --> 00:46:04,720
Speaker 1: it And for me that was everything because you could

772
00:46:04,760 --> 00:46:10,520
Speaker 1: think and have chosen anybody, you feel me, anybody, but

773
00:46:10,680 --> 00:46:13,760
Speaker 1: you did that. And there are people in the world

774
00:46:14,680 --> 00:46:17,359
Speaker 1: who might have had different things to say about that.

775
00:46:18,840 --> 00:46:21,239
Speaker 1: And I'm gonna say then people didn't call me then,

776
00:46:21,280 --> 00:46:24,359
Speaker 1: people didn't ask me about my children, They didn't ask

777
00:46:24,440 --> 00:46:26,600
Speaker 1: me about what was going on in my life because

778
00:46:26,600 --> 00:46:31,919
Speaker 1: they didn't care you feel me. But someone who did

779
00:46:32,000 --> 00:46:35,960
Speaker 1: have an opportunity and did care, did reach out, did

780
00:46:36,080 --> 00:46:39,480
Speaker 1: say not only do I support you, but I also

781
00:46:39,600 --> 00:46:42,480
Speaker 1: want you with me to support me. See these are

782
00:46:42,760 --> 00:46:45,800
Speaker 1: that's that's that's, that's what the funk I'm talking about

783
00:46:46,880 --> 00:46:53,520
Speaker 1: under saying show, show improve, show improve you hear me

784
00:46:52,719 --> 00:46:58,239
Speaker 1: show I couldn't have picked two better people. And mind you,

785
00:46:58,280 --> 00:47:00,239
Speaker 1: when you did call me, it was the second time

786
00:47:00,280 --> 00:47:03,440
Speaker 1: you called me in two months. It was a second time.

787
00:47:04,280 --> 00:47:06,680
Speaker 1: It was the second time, by the way, when you're

788
00:47:06,680 --> 00:47:12,000
Speaker 1: called it wasn't the first, it was the second. I'm sorry,

789
00:47:12,080 --> 00:47:14,480
Speaker 1: you'll keep a promise. You gotta keep a promise. Man.

790
00:47:15,880 --> 00:47:20,480
Speaker 1: It might take me fifteen years to do it. But hey,

791
00:47:21,160 --> 00:47:23,640
Speaker 1: but it's not even like that. But it's true. It's

792
00:47:23,680 --> 00:47:27,080
Speaker 1: it might take me, or it might take someone a

793
00:47:27,080 --> 00:47:29,800
Speaker 1: long time to do what they want to do for

794
00:47:30,120 --> 00:47:34,000
Speaker 1: or with you, but it's it really is divine intervention.

795
00:47:34,040 --> 00:47:38,640
Speaker 1: It really is divine timing. And to rush something, to

796
00:47:38,840 --> 00:47:43,759
Speaker 1: force something and you're only blocking it, you're not moving it.

797
00:47:43,760 --> 00:47:48,560
Speaker 1: It will be stagnant because you're forcing the thing. A

798
00:47:48,600 --> 00:47:52,520
Speaker 1: little bit of sugar, it goes a long way. Put

799
00:47:52,560 --> 00:47:56,560
Speaker 1: that just I mean, listen, I told you that was

800
00:47:56,640 --> 00:47:58,359
Speaker 1: I feel like it was two years ago when Jill

801
00:47:58,480 --> 00:48:00,359
Speaker 1: was like, like, if I ever do a I care,

802
00:48:00,440 --> 00:48:03,800
Speaker 1: so tell me with me. And I was like, okay,

803
00:48:04,440 --> 00:48:09,160
Speaker 1: we just say And it's just about somebody keeping their words,

804
00:48:09,800 --> 00:48:13,880
Speaker 1: especially to me, because I'm yeah, I appreciate you, I

805
00:48:13,960 --> 00:48:17,399
Speaker 1: love you too, and and this is this is by

806
00:48:17,440 --> 00:48:22,120
Speaker 1: no means the last thing that we should be saying. Um,

807
00:48:22,680 --> 00:48:30,200
Speaker 1: oh gosh, thank you so much for the support of

808
00:48:30,400 --> 00:48:39,440
Speaker 1: our Fansy man, do you show up for everything? It

809
00:48:39,520 --> 00:48:42,239
Speaker 1: may not be all the time, but you show up

810
00:48:42,360 --> 00:48:46,320
Speaker 1: and your intentions are pure. You believe in what we're doing.

811
00:48:46,840 --> 00:48:50,200
Speaker 1: You you enjoy it, you share it, you talk about it,

812
00:48:50,560 --> 00:48:54,359
Speaker 1: you know, you're you're you're sparking conversations in your own

813
00:48:54,400 --> 00:48:58,880
Speaker 1: household about some conversation that we've sparked, and you are

814
00:48:59,000 --> 00:49:02,719
Speaker 1: just so so appreciated or every level. Thank you for

815
00:49:02,800 --> 00:49:08,279
Speaker 1: your genuine, genuine love and support. It's a beautiful thing.

816
00:49:08,440 --> 00:49:24,120
Speaker 1: God bless you. We'll be right back. Thank you so

817
00:49:24,200 --> 00:49:28,239
Speaker 1: much for listening to Jay dot Ill. We love you.

818
00:49:28,520 --> 00:49:30,520
Speaker 1: We told y'all if y'all left us a message at

819
00:49:30,560 --> 00:49:33,200
Speaker 1: A six six hey Jill or sent us a voice

820
00:49:33,280 --> 00:49:36,319
Speaker 1: memo that you might hear yourself on an episode. Well,

821
00:49:36,400 --> 00:49:38,160
Speaker 1: we don't lie, or at least we try not to.

822
00:49:38,400 --> 00:49:41,239
Speaker 1: So thanks to everybody who did leave these messages. We

823
00:49:41,280 --> 00:49:43,800
Speaker 1: are going to give you the last word, a moment

824
00:49:43,800 --> 00:49:46,399
Speaker 1: when we give our listeners a chance to say how

825
00:49:46,400 --> 00:49:51,279
Speaker 1: they really feel. Hi. My name is Brenda Guja. I'm

826
00:49:51,320 --> 00:49:54,600
Speaker 1: a huge fan. My pronouns are she and hers, and

827
00:49:54,680 --> 00:49:59,279
Speaker 1: I identify as a SIS, gender, non disabled, cast privileged

828
00:49:59,640 --> 00:50:06,120
Speaker 1: queer South Asian American woman and choreographer and organizer and

829
00:50:06,880 --> 00:50:12,120
Speaker 1: activists and arts administrator. I just listened. I'm I'm an

830
00:50:12,160 --> 00:50:16,680
Speaker 1: avid listener. I'm one of your biggest fans. UH. And

831
00:50:17,160 --> 00:50:19,120
Speaker 1: I can't believe I just said that. All right here

832
00:50:19,160 --> 00:50:21,719
Speaker 1: we are, UM, I just listen to can I be

833
00:50:22,040 --> 00:50:29,240
Speaker 1: a quilte And I'm considering notions of ancestral trauma, ancestral

834
00:50:29,520 --> 00:50:36,520
Speaker 1: and generational um, weights of suffering and of resilience and power,

835
00:50:36,920 --> 00:50:39,279
Speaker 1: and how that gets passed down through our muscles, through

836
00:50:39,320 --> 00:50:42,360
Speaker 1: our bones. I'm speaking from a from a from a

837
00:50:42,480 --> 00:50:46,400
Speaker 1: dance teacher and dance choreographer's perspective as well. How that

838
00:50:46,480 --> 00:50:48,880
Speaker 1: moves in our bodies, how that moves in our muscles,

839
00:50:48,880 --> 00:50:53,480
Speaker 1: how that moves into our psyches and then into our children. UM.

840
00:50:53,719 --> 00:50:57,560
Speaker 1: Really loved the conversation. Uh. I don't like as a

841
00:50:57,560 --> 00:51:00,800
Speaker 1: South Asian woman. I don't want to be in a box.

842
00:51:01,280 --> 00:51:04,279
Speaker 1: I don't want to be in aquipse. I don't want

843
00:51:04,320 --> 00:51:06,200
Speaker 1: to be in a book. I don't want to be

844
00:51:06,400 --> 00:51:09,799
Speaker 1: anywhere where I am being defined by other people. And

845
00:51:09,840 --> 00:51:12,920
Speaker 1: at the same time, I want to be everywhere so

846
00:51:12,960 --> 00:51:15,680
Speaker 1: that I am on the consciousness and My multiplicity is

847
00:51:15,680 --> 00:51:19,880
Speaker 1: on the consciousness of everybody. UM. I'm just such a

848
00:51:19,880 --> 00:51:22,920
Speaker 1: big fan and you said there was a hotline, so

849
00:51:23,000 --> 00:51:25,000
Speaker 1: I gave it a shot. It's a long shot, but

850
00:51:25,400 --> 00:51:28,080
Speaker 1: here I am. Thanks for all the great work you do,

851
00:51:28,160 --> 00:51:30,760
Speaker 1: all three of you. UM. You inspire a lot of people,

852
00:51:31,000 --> 00:51:35,359
Speaker 1: even if you don't know it. UM. Many blessings, Right,

853
00:51:36,360 --> 00:51:39,279
Speaker 1: good morning, village. My name is Andre J. I'm out

854
00:51:39,280 --> 00:51:42,000
Speaker 1: of Michigan, and I just wanted to just send so

855
00:51:42,160 --> 00:51:45,360
Speaker 1: much love and good grace to you women. You have

856
00:51:45,480 --> 00:51:49,520
Speaker 1: inspired me to continue on doing my podcast, which is

857
00:51:49,560 --> 00:51:53,640
Speaker 1: called Bulletprooso speaks to podcasts. I shout you out as

858
00:51:53,719 --> 00:51:55,799
Speaker 1: much as I can, just showing to you as much

859
00:51:55,880 --> 00:51:59,000
Speaker 1: love as I can, because I'm telling you you have

860
00:51:59,280 --> 00:52:03,200
Speaker 1: inspired me. You have motivated me. You haven't lift uplifted

861
00:52:03,239 --> 00:52:05,839
Speaker 1: me and and and continue to encourage me to do

862
00:52:05,880 --> 00:52:08,799
Speaker 1: better and keep striving for more. The perspectives that you

863
00:52:08,880 --> 00:52:12,360
Speaker 1: provide on a weekly basis challenged me to think outside

864
00:52:12,360 --> 00:52:14,880
Speaker 1: of myself for a moment and just looking at it

865
00:52:14,920 --> 00:52:18,279
Speaker 1: from a different way and laugh at it and and

866
00:52:18,280 --> 00:52:21,840
Speaker 1: and and cry at it sometimes but nonetheless gain something

867
00:52:21,920 --> 00:52:24,160
Speaker 1: from it. And I just thank you for having the

868
00:52:24,280 --> 00:52:29,279
Speaker 1: resilience to all have different items going on in your

869
00:52:29,320 --> 00:52:32,440
Speaker 1: life and being able to manage them and also educate

870
00:52:32,560 --> 00:52:38,040
Speaker 1: others to be great people and to be constantly evolving

871
00:52:38,080 --> 00:52:42,400
Speaker 1: and innovating. And it's just amazing what you ladies have done.

872
00:52:42,440 --> 00:52:46,120
Speaker 1: I'm forever greatful him, forever thankful. How I could go

873
00:52:46,160 --> 00:52:52,200
Speaker 1: on this rant for hours just by not only this podcast,

874
00:52:52,239 --> 00:52:55,000
Speaker 1: how you ladies have inspired me, but your life's work,

875
00:52:55,360 --> 00:52:59,760
Speaker 1: through your music, through your through your your your your literature,

876
00:53:00,080 --> 00:53:03,239
Speaker 1: use me, just all the resources and tools that you

877
00:53:03,280 --> 00:53:07,800
Speaker 1: guys have provided to us over the years. We're we're

878
00:53:07,800 --> 00:53:10,879
Speaker 1: not we're not worthy of all that, all that good

879
00:53:10,920 --> 00:53:13,480
Speaker 1: knowledge that you've given. But I just want to thank you, ladies.

880
00:53:13,880 --> 00:53:15,560
Speaker 1: I thank you, I thank you, I thank you. I

881
00:53:15,560 --> 00:53:18,399
Speaker 1: hope I ever get the chance to meet you or

882
00:53:18,840 --> 00:53:21,080
Speaker 1: you know, be involved in the podcast, just to give

883
00:53:21,120 --> 00:53:24,759
Speaker 1: you love personally, because I mean, I'm telling you, you

884
00:53:24,880 --> 00:53:27,640
Speaker 1: just don't know what you have done as far as

885
00:53:27,719 --> 00:53:30,680
Speaker 1: the motivation, the fire that you've put inside of me.

886
00:53:31,040 --> 00:53:34,880
Speaker 1: And just with this latest episode we're speaking about caregiving,

887
00:53:34,920 --> 00:53:38,400
Speaker 1: I'm actually experiencing that through life right now. And the

888
00:53:38,440 --> 00:53:41,319
Speaker 1: fact that you called out all the things that I'm

889
00:53:41,360 --> 00:53:44,120
Speaker 1: feeling and called out all the things that someone else

890
00:53:44,200 --> 00:53:46,879
Speaker 1: might be feeling. It's just some of the challenges that

891
00:53:47,040 --> 00:53:50,719
Speaker 1: comes along with that, but being able to be triumphant

892
00:53:50,760 --> 00:53:53,200
Speaker 1: through it all and just learning from it and learning

893
00:53:53,239 --> 00:53:56,440
Speaker 1: our people and learning how to accept the fact that

894
00:53:56,520 --> 00:54:00,520
Speaker 1: one day the transition will become of all of us,

895
00:54:00,560 --> 00:54:03,120
Speaker 1: but just being able to cope with it and just

896
00:54:03,200 --> 00:54:05,759
Speaker 1: live our best lives. I mean, you just could not

897
00:54:05,800 --> 00:54:10,160
Speaker 1: have touched a piece of my life so directly. I

898
00:54:10,200 --> 00:54:12,720
Speaker 1: mean I was just in awe. I had to listen

899
00:54:12,760 --> 00:54:16,320
Speaker 1: to about three or four times because of the impact

900
00:54:16,800 --> 00:54:20,120
Speaker 1: that it made on me. So, Ladies, I told you

901
00:54:20,200 --> 00:54:22,839
Speaker 1: this before through social media, but I want to tell

902
00:54:22,840 --> 00:54:25,680
Speaker 1: you again, thank you so much for taking time out

903
00:54:25,719 --> 00:54:28,680
Speaker 1: of your lives, your busy lives, to be able to

904
00:54:28,760 --> 00:54:33,440
Speaker 1: be a vessel for all of us who are still learning,

905
00:54:33,560 --> 00:54:37,520
Speaker 1: still growing, still loving, and making us become better people

906
00:54:37,600 --> 00:54:41,840
Speaker 1: and helping us understand so many different areas of life

907
00:54:42,000 --> 00:54:45,640
Speaker 1: that sometimes we wonder and sometimes that we kind of

908
00:54:45,640 --> 00:54:49,240
Speaker 1: feel a little bit defeated at. You've given us that strength,

909
00:54:49,239 --> 00:54:51,520
Speaker 1: and you've given us that courage to keep on pushing

910
00:54:51,520 --> 00:54:54,720
Speaker 1: and keep on moving, And for that, I am forever grateful.

911
00:54:55,160 --> 00:54:57,840
Speaker 1: I love you, ladies. I can't wait to see what's next.

912
00:54:58,360 --> 00:55:01,319
Speaker 1: I know this podcast is definitely going to evolve into

913
00:55:01,400 --> 00:55:05,600
Speaker 1: something much more, greater and bigger. You deserve a war

914
00:55:05,800 --> 00:55:09,719
Speaker 1: for it, but I know you're not doing it for

915
00:55:09,760 --> 00:55:13,920
Speaker 1: that reason. You're doing it strictly form the heart and

916
00:55:14,040 --> 00:55:17,640
Speaker 1: to pretty much encourage us. And I'm telling you me personally,

917
00:55:18,080 --> 00:55:20,440
Speaker 1: You've done more than encourage me. You've done more to

918
00:55:20,719 --> 00:55:23,600
Speaker 1: motivated me. You've pretty much given me a new look

919
00:55:23,960 --> 00:55:25,960
Speaker 1: on life. And I just thank you, ladies for that.

920
00:55:26,040 --> 00:55:31,480
Speaker 1: I love you all, Stay safe, talk to you soon. Hi, ladies.

921
00:55:32,880 --> 00:55:37,279
Speaker 1: My name is Destiny Spella. I UM. I've been in

922
00:55:37,640 --> 00:55:42,279
Speaker 1: listeners from the beginning and there's so many episodes that

923
00:55:43,040 --> 00:55:47,440
Speaker 1: I can point on, but this last one from last

924
00:55:47,440 --> 00:55:52,360
Speaker 1: week therapy versus self care and the praying the pain away.

925
00:55:52,840 --> 00:55:57,960
Speaker 1: Can I be equipped? Uh? My mom said, I mean,

926
00:55:58,000 --> 00:56:01,040
Speaker 1: there's so many that you guys have had, but those

927
00:56:01,040 --> 00:56:06,800
Speaker 1: two in particular, UM have touched me and I you

928
00:56:06,920 --> 00:56:09,799
Speaker 1: know you are my phone coach, my found coach, my

929
00:56:09,840 --> 00:56:14,280
Speaker 1: boys coach. From the beginnings. UM been listening to Kendricks

930
00:56:14,920 --> 00:56:18,160
Speaker 1: the Family Soul the beginning, and I'm so happy to

931
00:56:18,239 --> 00:56:22,160
Speaker 1: have Layah as a new best friend. I'm calling because

932
00:56:22,520 --> 00:56:26,799
Speaker 1: I have gone through everything. I'll take it back. You

933
00:56:26,840 --> 00:56:30,319
Speaker 1: guys on your show has said everything that's happening to

934
00:56:30,400 --> 00:56:32,120
Speaker 1: me right now in my life. I'm a thirty eight

935
00:56:32,200 --> 00:56:36,960
Speaker 1: year old single black mother living in Virginia. I carry

936
00:56:37,000 --> 00:56:39,000
Speaker 1: the mail for the United States Postal Services for the

937
00:56:39,080 --> 00:56:43,320
Speaker 1: last seven years, and I am going through a coming

938
00:56:43,360 --> 00:56:47,799
Speaker 1: of age. I would say, UM, real life crisis right now.

939
00:56:48,040 --> 00:56:50,920
Speaker 1: Admitted my house self into a hospital last month for

940
00:56:51,120 --> 00:56:54,320
Speaker 1: my mental health and was diagnosed with a major depressive disorder.

941
00:56:54,920 --> 00:56:57,360
Speaker 1: I had, at the same time broken up with a

942
00:56:57,480 --> 00:57:00,719
Speaker 1: year long relationship with somebody that I love and have

943
00:57:00,880 --> 00:57:04,960
Speaker 1: known since two thousand and fourteen. We started dating in

944
00:57:06,440 --> 00:57:10,480
Speaker 1: during the pandemic and it ended abruptly, and I was

945
00:57:10,600 --> 00:57:14,759
Speaker 1: grieving this relationship, and that grief brought out so many

946
00:57:14,840 --> 00:57:19,560
Speaker 1: childhood traumas, so many adulthood traumas, um and obviously the

947
00:57:19,640 --> 00:57:23,640
Speaker 1: loss of a relationship. UM. I need y'all. I need

948
00:57:23,920 --> 00:57:27,200
Speaker 1: everything that y'all can feed me on a weekly basis.

949
00:57:28,920 --> 00:57:32,720
Speaker 1: Y'all are sisters to me, and it's sparked in me

950
00:57:33,640 --> 00:57:38,440
Speaker 1: m the need to have relationships with women because I

951
00:57:38,520 --> 00:57:41,680
Speaker 1: have been a guy's girl all my life, and I

952
00:57:41,760 --> 00:57:43,880
Speaker 1: mean I think a lot of my trauma comes from that.

953
00:57:44,880 --> 00:57:49,200
Speaker 1: So I love y'all and just know that I will

954
00:57:49,240 --> 00:57:52,120
Speaker 1: listen to every episode again just to make sure that

955
00:57:52,240 --> 00:57:57,760
Speaker 1: I am on my stuff. You uplift me, you motivate me. Um.

956
00:57:58,840 --> 00:58:02,920
Speaker 1: It's almost like laying prostrate and reading the word and

957
00:58:03,000 --> 00:58:06,560
Speaker 1: praying to God. Um. Those things you guys have all

958
00:58:06,640 --> 00:58:10,440
Speaker 1: confirmed some things in me that I'd like to change

959
00:58:10,440 --> 00:58:14,720
Speaker 1: about myself. So I love you guys. Hey, Jim, my

960
00:58:14,800 --> 00:58:18,440
Speaker 1: name is arka Um. I am referring to the e

961
00:58:18,520 --> 00:58:22,880
Speaker 1: S an Urgent Care episode as a black Zula in

962
00:58:23,080 --> 00:58:28,080
Speaker 1: Atlanta and also a fourth year medical students to be residents.

963
00:58:28,800 --> 00:58:31,760
Speaker 1: I just want to say, thank you, thank you, thank

964
00:58:31,840 --> 00:58:36,520
Speaker 1: you for shedding light on the black maternal health mortality

965
00:58:36,640 --> 00:58:41,560
Speaker 1: crisis and giving dulas a spot in your conversation. We

966
00:58:41,800 --> 00:58:47,000
Speaker 1: are so underrated, unheard of, nobody knows who we are

967
00:58:47,080 --> 00:58:51,640
Speaker 1: what we do, but week were cordis unsung heroes. I

968
00:58:51,800 --> 00:58:54,120
Speaker 1: thank you, thank you, thank you, and it's ering Black

969
00:58:54,160 --> 00:58:57,680
Speaker 1: Maternal Health Week. Oh my gosh, you did it. Y'all

970
00:58:57,760 --> 00:59:00,120
Speaker 1: did it. Thank you and we're so proud of me.

971
00:59:00,320 --> 00:59:04,120
Speaker 1: Thank you. Hi, my name is Charlotte. I'm calling a

972
00:59:04,200 --> 00:59:08,480
Speaker 1: reference to the episode therapy versus self care, and I

973
00:59:08,600 --> 00:59:13,600
Speaker 1: cannot say thank you enough. Ladies. You don't know how

974
00:59:13,760 --> 00:59:17,160
Speaker 1: much this episode helped me. More specifically, Joe, when you

975
00:59:17,280 --> 00:59:22,080
Speaker 1: mentioned your friends just screaming it out and you um

976
00:59:22,720 --> 00:59:27,440
Speaker 1: embracing her, that was the best because sometimes there aren't

977
00:59:27,520 --> 00:59:31,040
Speaker 1: words that can soothe your soul. You just need that

978
00:59:31,360 --> 00:59:34,160
Speaker 1: hug and you need that embrace and it says it all.

979
00:59:35,040 --> 00:59:40,120
Speaker 1: And Aja, when you mentioned grieving and saying, you know,

980
00:59:40,200 --> 00:59:42,440
Speaker 1: I wonder if people are tired of hearing about it,

981
00:59:42,920 --> 00:59:46,960
Speaker 1: I was the same way. And again I understand that

982
00:59:47,240 --> 00:59:50,440
Speaker 1: there is no limited time. When I want to speak

983
00:59:50,520 --> 00:59:53,480
Speaker 1: my piece and reference to my mother, I speak it

984
00:59:53,720 --> 00:59:56,680
Speaker 1: because it's released from me. And I just have to

985
00:59:56,760 --> 01:00:01,200
Speaker 1: say thank you again, ladies for how having this discussion,

986
01:00:01,440 --> 01:00:05,160
Speaker 1: because it's much needed. Black women are always supposed to

987
01:00:05,200 --> 01:00:09,680
Speaker 1: be so strong and uphold themselves all the time, and

988
01:00:10,360 --> 01:00:13,120
Speaker 1: you proved in the episodes that we have feelings just

989
01:00:13,280 --> 01:00:15,640
Speaker 1: like the next person, and you have to get row

990
01:00:15,800 --> 01:00:17,400
Speaker 1: and you have to get to the center of the

991
01:00:17,480 --> 01:00:23,760
Speaker 1: emotion and just be you. So thank you, hey, you

992
01:00:24,120 --> 01:00:27,760
Speaker 1: Asian Layah. This is so fearful Philly. Um, I just

993
01:00:27,960 --> 01:00:32,280
Speaker 1: listened to them what my mama told me episode where

994
01:00:32,680 --> 01:00:36,080
Speaker 1: you talked about what your parents taught you about sex,

995
01:00:36,360 --> 01:00:40,720
Speaker 1: and I just wanted to say thank you for your content. Um.

996
01:00:40,880 --> 01:00:45,640
Speaker 1: I'm raising three young men, and to be honest, I

997
01:00:45,760 --> 01:00:49,320
Speaker 1: didn't even think about how I was going to speak

998
01:00:49,400 --> 01:00:53,760
Speaker 1: to them about, you know, them getting older, starting to

999
01:00:53,880 --> 01:00:56,560
Speaker 1: write girls and and things that they were gonna do

1000
01:00:56,720 --> 01:00:59,720
Speaker 1: when they're thinking about having sex. And so you guys

1001
01:00:59,760 --> 01:01:02,480
Speaker 1: gave me a lot of insight, and I just want

1002
01:01:02,520 --> 01:01:04,120
Speaker 1: to thank you for the work that you're doing. I

1003
01:01:04,200 --> 01:01:08,320
Speaker 1: want to encourage you to uh keep going and just

1004
01:01:08,560 --> 01:01:11,520
Speaker 1: keep blessing us that we do appreciate it. I love

1005
01:01:11,600 --> 01:01:16,080
Speaker 1: you guys, and take care. Hey, Joe, Layah and Asia,

1006
01:01:17,080 --> 01:01:21,280
Speaker 1: I love, love, love your podcast. I listened to you

1007
01:01:21,560 --> 01:01:25,880
Speaker 1: weekly on my long walk day, uh walking through my

1008
01:01:26,000 --> 01:01:28,600
Speaker 1: neighborhood because it's COVID and what else we're gonna do.

1009
01:01:29,520 --> 01:01:33,960
Speaker 1: But I find you guys always smart, irreverent, funny and

1010
01:01:34,200 --> 01:01:38,200
Speaker 1: always joyful. Please keep doing what you're doing. I'm particular

1011
01:01:38,440 --> 01:01:44,000
Speaker 1: like what's on your heart. Have a fantastic day. Came

1012
01:01:44,080 --> 01:01:59,000
Speaker 1: way to hear more from you by hi if you

1013
01:01:59,120 --> 01:02:02,439
Speaker 1: have comments and something we said in this episode called

1014
01:02:02,560 --> 01:02:05,919
Speaker 1: eight six six. Hey, Jill, if you want to add

1015
01:02:05,960 --> 01:02:09,720
Speaker 1: to this conversation, that's eight six six three nine five

1016
01:02:09,840 --> 01:02:12,800
Speaker 1: four five five. Don't forget to tell us your name

1017
01:02:12,920 --> 01:02:16,360
Speaker 1: and the episode you're referring to. You might just hear

1018
01:02:16,440 --> 01:02:20,120
Speaker 1: your message on a future episode. Thank you for listening

1019
01:02:20,320 --> 01:02:24,120
Speaker 1: to Jill Scott Presents Jay dot Il the podcast. This

1020
01:02:24,320 --> 01:02:27,800
Speaker 1: podcast is hosted by Jill Scott, Layah st Clair and

1021
01:02:28,080 --> 01:02:32,280
Speaker 1: Age Graden Danceller. It's executive producers are Jill Scott, Shawn

1022
01:02:32,360 --> 01:02:35,720
Speaker 1: g and Brian Calhoun. It's produced by Laya st Clair

1023
01:02:36,120 --> 01:02:39,240
Speaker 1: and me Eves Jeff Cope. The editing and sound design

1024
01:02:39,320 --> 01:02:46,919
Speaker 1: for this episode we're done by Christina Larenger. No, don't

1025
01:02:46,960 --> 01:02:51,000
Speaker 1: mess with it because you'll hear it. That's what phone

1026
01:02:51,400 --> 01:02:56,160
Speaker 1: watch touching around your face for real? Yeah, yeah, because

1027
01:02:56,160 --> 01:02:57,800
Speaker 1: it sounds like a microphone when you hit on the

1028
01:02:57,880 --> 01:03:09,280
Speaker 1: microphone to see now, that's what I call support. We

1029
01:03:09,400 --> 01:03:16,840
Speaker 1: got you, You got a sege home, That's what I

1030
01:03:16,960 --> 01:03:21,200
Speaker 1: call support. J dot Ill is a production of I

1031
01:03:21,520 --> 01:03:25,840
Speaker 1: Heart Radio. For more podcasts from I Heart Radio, visit

1032
01:03:25,960 --> 01:03:30,160
Speaker 1: the I Heart Radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you

1033
01:03:30,280 --> 01:03:31,840
Speaker 1: listen to your favorite shows,