1 00:00:00,120 --> 00:00:00,680 Speaker 1: Atlanta. 2 00:00:00,840 --> 00:00:03,520 Speaker 2: Guess what the good Moms are coming to your city 3 00:00:03,640 --> 00:00:06,440 Speaker 2: on April twenty six. We're pulling up at the Black 4 00:00:06,519 --> 00:00:08,879 Speaker 2: Effect Podcast Festival. 5 00:00:09,119 --> 00:00:11,320 Speaker 3: That's right, We'll be hitting the stage with other hot 6 00:00:11,360 --> 00:00:15,160 Speaker 3: podcasts like R and B, Money, Trap Nerds, Naked Sports, 7 00:00:15,280 --> 00:00:16,480 Speaker 3: and Sarah Jakes. 8 00:00:16,640 --> 00:00:18,640 Speaker 2: And if you've ever been to a Good Mom's Bad 9 00:00:18,720 --> 00:00:22,680 Speaker 2: Choices show, you know it gets real, real bad, and 10 00:00:22,720 --> 00:00:25,040 Speaker 2: we have some special guests. So I'm so excited to 11 00:00:25,079 --> 00:00:27,600 Speaker 2: meet our Atlanta tribe. Make sure you pull up April 12 00:00:27,600 --> 00:00:30,560 Speaker 2: twenty six to the Black Effect Podcast Festival and get 13 00:00:30,560 --> 00:00:34,320 Speaker 2: your tickets at Black Effect dot Com Slash Podcast Festival. 14 00:00:34,400 --> 00:00:34,839 Speaker 1: See you there. 15 00:00:35,280 --> 00:00:38,600 Speaker 4: Once upon a time there was a good old traditional housewife. 16 00:00:38,760 --> 00:00:42,040 Speaker 4: She cleaned, cared for her children and the man of 17 00:00:42,080 --> 00:00:44,960 Speaker 4: the house, and of course she didn't talk back. She 18 00:00:45,120 --> 00:00:47,839 Speaker 4: was both obedient and soft by nature. She was a 19 00:00:47,880 --> 00:00:52,440 Speaker 4: good woman who always made good choices. That shit off. 20 00:00:52,520 --> 00:00:53,840 Speaker 1: We're Good Mom's Bad Choices. 21 00:00:53,920 --> 00:00:56,600 Speaker 3: Two single mom who said fuck the patriarchy, shared all 22 00:00:56,640 --> 00:00:57,560 Speaker 3: their bad choices and. 23 00:00:57,520 --> 00:00:59,720 Speaker 1: Sound out they were so bad after all, we're experts. 24 00:00:59,720 --> 00:01:02,480 Speaker 3: Over and your new besties, Sit back. 25 00:01:02,320 --> 00:01:09,040 Speaker 1: And enjoy the ride. Welcome back to Good Mom's Bad choices. 26 00:01:09,080 --> 00:01:14,039 Speaker 3: I'm Erica and I'm Mela. Happy Wednesday, Top Day, Beaches, 27 00:01:14,480 --> 00:01:19,480 Speaker 3: It's today. Do the hump de hump. You're not supposed 28 00:01:19,480 --> 00:01:20,399 Speaker 3: to sing license music. 29 00:01:20,560 --> 00:01:24,760 Speaker 2: Oh shit, sorry black I'm back. Shout out to Black Effect, 30 00:01:24,840 --> 00:01:27,679 Speaker 2: We love our network. Shout out to Charlomne and the 31 00:01:27,680 --> 00:01:30,920 Speaker 2: God You're that nigga, and shout out to us for 32 00:01:30,959 --> 00:01:32,880 Speaker 2: being black women doing the goddamn thing. 33 00:01:33,240 --> 00:01:36,039 Speaker 3: Shout out to us on this fine Wednesday. I'm very 34 00:01:36,120 --> 00:01:38,440 Speaker 3: proud of us. We've come a long way. We are 35 00:01:38,520 --> 00:01:42,360 Speaker 3: black women doing black things on a black network, staying black, 36 00:01:42,440 --> 00:01:43,960 Speaker 3: tuere our blackness. 37 00:01:43,560 --> 00:01:47,160 Speaker 1: Black as fuck, doing black shit for. 38 00:01:47,120 --> 00:01:49,320 Speaker 3: Our white listeners. This is a space for you too, 39 00:01:49,480 --> 00:01:51,560 Speaker 3: But we are black. If you haven't noticed, I have 40 00:01:51,600 --> 00:01:52,240 Speaker 3: white friends. 41 00:01:53,600 --> 00:01:56,080 Speaker 1: Wait did you see I have white friends? Did you 42 00:01:56,120 --> 00:02:00,240 Speaker 1: see that? Technically it was all of it was like 43 00:02:01,240 --> 00:02:01,919 Speaker 1: Rivers Canning. 44 00:02:02,120 --> 00:02:04,320 Speaker 3: It was just black, all black people saying things that 45 00:02:04,360 --> 00:02:06,760 Speaker 3: white people would say, like, Oh, I have a sister 46 00:02:06,760 --> 00:02:07,680 Speaker 3: in law that's white. 47 00:02:09,040 --> 00:02:11,120 Speaker 1: Oh my god, can I touch your hair? It's so 48 00:02:11,800 --> 00:02:13,519 Speaker 1: oh my god, you're so cute for a white girl. 49 00:02:13,720 --> 00:02:15,000 Speaker 1: You're so pretty for a white girl. 50 00:02:15,080 --> 00:02:16,919 Speaker 3: That's no, that's a compliment. Do you Oh my god, 51 00:02:16,919 --> 00:02:17,720 Speaker 3: you talk like that. 52 00:02:17,720 --> 00:02:22,120 Speaker 1: It's so cute. Though it was great you went to 53 00:02:22,160 --> 00:02:22,920 Speaker 1: private school. 54 00:02:23,320 --> 00:02:26,080 Speaker 3: Oh, that's tell me about your experience, like growing up 55 00:02:26,080 --> 00:02:34,280 Speaker 3: in that suburban area. If you're just joining us, we 56 00:02:34,360 --> 00:02:37,160 Speaker 3: are Erica and Mela. I am Mila. This is Erica 57 00:02:37,160 --> 00:02:39,359 Speaker 3: and the Blue and we are two black women from 58 00:02:39,360 --> 00:02:42,240 Speaker 3: the valley, which you will find is kind of a 59 00:02:42,320 --> 00:02:43,320 Speaker 3: rare find. 60 00:02:43,080 --> 00:02:46,280 Speaker 2: The valley meeting in the valley of California, Los Angeles. 61 00:02:46,280 --> 00:02:48,600 Speaker 3: The only valley that counts, which is the San Fernando Valley. 62 00:02:48,639 --> 00:02:50,600 Speaker 3: So if you bitches are listening from all those other valleys, 63 00:02:50,600 --> 00:02:53,200 Speaker 3: you know we're not talking about the valley. The valley 64 00:02:53,280 --> 00:02:56,200 Speaker 3: is this valley, San Fernando Valley. And you know, I 65 00:02:56,480 --> 00:02:59,680 Speaker 3: noticed that we're like radio personalities. And then like just 66 00:02:59,720 --> 00:03:02,000 Speaker 3: on the strength that no one can see our faces 67 00:03:02,080 --> 00:03:04,880 Speaker 3: and you're watching on YouTube, which you should because we're 68 00:03:04,919 --> 00:03:06,520 Speaker 3: kind of fine and we put on makeup and shit. 69 00:03:07,080 --> 00:03:10,440 Speaker 3: But in the beginning a lot of people were making 70 00:03:10,480 --> 00:03:13,240 Speaker 3: comments in our reviews that they were uncomfortable with us, 71 00:03:13,240 --> 00:03:17,080 Speaker 3: saying baby daddy and nigga, but we're niggas. So I 72 00:03:17,120 --> 00:03:17,720 Speaker 3: hope that you. 73 00:03:18,280 --> 00:03:19,240 Speaker 1: Now that we've gotten that up. 74 00:03:19,240 --> 00:03:21,120 Speaker 4: The way. 75 00:03:21,240 --> 00:03:23,720 Speaker 3: Now that we've made that clear, this is an inclusive space. 76 00:03:24,960 --> 00:03:26,280 Speaker 3: How are you doing today, dear. 77 00:03:26,360 --> 00:03:27,080 Speaker 1: I'm doing great. 78 00:03:28,240 --> 00:03:31,280 Speaker 2: I haven't worn this dress in a really long time, 79 00:03:31,840 --> 00:03:34,280 Speaker 2: and because I've been in love for one year straight, 80 00:03:34,520 --> 00:03:37,120 Speaker 2: I've also put on twenty pounds in. 81 00:03:37,120 --> 00:03:37,840 Speaker 1: One year straight. 82 00:03:38,000 --> 00:03:41,920 Speaker 3: Funny, I can't tell no, oh wow, I see you 83 00:03:42,000 --> 00:03:42,600 Speaker 3: every day. 84 00:03:42,440 --> 00:03:45,360 Speaker 1: Too, so that's true. I'm just slowly growing before your eyes. 85 00:03:46,480 --> 00:03:48,200 Speaker 2: And so I've been like looking at this dress and 86 00:03:48,240 --> 00:03:50,120 Speaker 2: I was like, I don't think it's gonna fit today. 87 00:03:50,160 --> 00:03:51,840 Speaker 1: I was like, it's just it's a button up all 88 00:03:51,840 --> 00:03:52,840 Speaker 1: but all dress. 89 00:03:53,040 --> 00:03:57,320 Speaker 2: But I know, no, that's not true. No, they don't 90 00:03:57,360 --> 00:04:01,480 Speaker 2: unless they're stretched, which this is stretch. But anyway, I'm 91 00:04:01,480 --> 00:04:02,680 Speaker 2: just gonna I'm here to encourage you. 92 00:04:02,720 --> 00:04:04,800 Speaker 1: Put it on the fucking dress. Stop letting it just 93 00:04:04,840 --> 00:04:06,320 Speaker 1: sit in the back of your closet, because that's what 94 00:04:06,320 --> 00:04:06,760 Speaker 1: I was doing. 95 00:04:06,800 --> 00:04:08,600 Speaker 2: I was like, I don't know, I'm gonna feel fat 96 00:04:08,640 --> 00:04:10,320 Speaker 2: in this dress and I don't want to wear it. 97 00:04:10,400 --> 00:04:12,480 Speaker 2: And then I then Orlando put me on the screen. 98 00:04:12,520 --> 00:04:15,000 Speaker 2: I was like, oh, no, bitch, sugar, you're cute. Thanks, 99 00:04:15,040 --> 00:04:15,800 Speaker 2: that's a cute dress. 100 00:04:16,279 --> 00:04:18,520 Speaker 3: I like dresses like that because you can always adjust 101 00:04:18,520 --> 00:04:20,960 Speaker 3: the cleavage and the split. If you guys don't know, 102 00:04:21,080 --> 00:04:23,080 Speaker 3: I'm the I like to dress like a HOUCHI, So 103 00:04:23,200 --> 00:04:27,000 Speaker 3: if there's always like leverage for split action in cleavage action, 104 00:04:27,080 --> 00:04:28,000 Speaker 3: it's always a way to go. 105 00:04:28,520 --> 00:04:28,719 Speaker 1: Yeah. 106 00:04:28,760 --> 00:04:30,680 Speaker 2: I think I've just been wearing I've been wearing a 107 00:04:30,720 --> 00:04:34,520 Speaker 2: lot of sweatpants in the last three hundred and sixty 108 00:04:34,520 --> 00:04:37,920 Speaker 2: five days. And I don't know, I just like I 109 00:04:37,960 --> 00:04:39,640 Speaker 2: was feeling like I just I don't know, I just 110 00:04:39,680 --> 00:04:40,000 Speaker 2: feel like. 111 00:04:40,000 --> 00:04:42,000 Speaker 1: I can't fit certain things. And I did. 112 00:04:42,000 --> 00:04:44,600 Speaker 2: I put on some pants and they were I was like, oh, bitch, yeah, 113 00:04:44,760 --> 00:04:46,479 Speaker 2: you need to probably put those pants on every day 114 00:04:46,520 --> 00:04:50,640 Speaker 2: so that you can manage what's happening. Anyway, I'm just 115 00:04:50,680 --> 00:04:52,600 Speaker 2: here to tell you to put on the dress. I 116 00:04:52,600 --> 00:04:54,640 Speaker 2: know really can't relate to this conversation, but I know 117 00:04:54,680 --> 00:04:57,240 Speaker 2: that there's women here that can so put the dress on. 118 00:04:57,520 --> 00:05:00,320 Speaker 3: If you're a very petite woman and you are having 119 00:05:00,360 --> 00:05:04,480 Speaker 3: problems finding extra extra smalls, tell me where they're located, 120 00:05:04,480 --> 00:05:07,560 Speaker 3: because that's very difficult to find and very annoying. I 121 00:05:07,600 --> 00:05:09,200 Speaker 3: have noticed that I only really got to be. 122 00:05:09,320 --> 00:05:13,920 Speaker 2: Like an extra extra small like website with all of 123 00:05:13,480 --> 00:05:15,080 Speaker 2: the lines that carry them. 124 00:05:15,160 --> 00:05:15,440 Speaker 1: Babe. 125 00:05:15,480 --> 00:05:17,400 Speaker 3: If you find the extra extra small website and maybe 126 00:05:17,400 --> 00:05:19,040 Speaker 3: I need to create it, please send it my way. 127 00:05:19,080 --> 00:05:20,960 Speaker 3: Where are the little China women with the extra extra 128 00:05:21,000 --> 00:05:24,800 Speaker 3: small websites? Because I would prefer I would look. I 129 00:05:24,800 --> 00:05:27,760 Speaker 3: literally look on Amazon extra Smalls and nothing comes up. 130 00:05:27,839 --> 00:05:31,240 Speaker 3: So it's like very particular petite women have a hard 131 00:05:31,240 --> 00:05:35,040 Speaker 3: time finding clothing, and it's a struggle too. But I 132 00:05:35,080 --> 00:05:37,560 Speaker 3: find that all my outfit wearing is here on the podcast, 133 00:05:37,640 --> 00:05:40,359 Speaker 3: on this couch, going absolutely nowhere after except my fucking 134 00:05:40,360 --> 00:05:43,400 Speaker 3: living room. So all my best outfits you get to 135 00:05:43,400 --> 00:05:47,920 Speaker 3: see them first repeats and everything. But you look great, 136 00:05:47,960 --> 00:05:52,000 Speaker 3: thank you. I like that dress, fix your color, I 137 00:05:52,160 --> 00:05:53,360 Speaker 3: like your I like those pants. 138 00:05:53,520 --> 00:05:55,880 Speaker 1: Thank you. I never seen you wear track pants before. 139 00:05:56,600 --> 00:05:59,080 Speaker 1: It's a fluffy heel. I also, in our previous episode, 140 00:05:59,080 --> 00:06:02,520 Speaker 1: you had sneakers on, which also is very rare. You're 141 00:06:02,560 --> 00:06:10,080 Speaker 1: really you're really expanding your your fashions. Okay, fun fact. 142 00:06:10,120 --> 00:06:12,680 Speaker 3: I like to wear high heels and dress sexy like 143 00:06:12,760 --> 00:06:16,600 Speaker 3: Jessica Rabbit most of the time, but occasionally we're on sneakers. 144 00:06:16,600 --> 00:06:18,880 Speaker 3: I'm also five foot two, so I know I look 145 00:06:19,040 --> 00:06:21,960 Speaker 3: very tall. Everyone thought I was five eleven, but I'm 146 00:06:21,960 --> 00:06:27,680 Speaker 3: not five to two. Today we have a very special guest. 147 00:06:27,880 --> 00:06:30,159 Speaker 3: You know, we've had men all months. We've had mostly 148 00:06:30,200 --> 00:06:32,160 Speaker 3: men all month, which is, you know, we don't have 149 00:06:32,200 --> 00:06:34,839 Speaker 3: a lot of men here on Good Mom's Bad Choices. 150 00:06:34,839 --> 00:06:36,960 Speaker 3: But today's been a special month. We've were joined by 151 00:06:37,000 --> 00:06:40,360 Speaker 3: our lovers. We were joined by the very very very 152 00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:44,880 Speaker 3: goddamn fine and talented, oh so fine, oh god so 153 00:06:45,000 --> 00:06:47,120 Speaker 3: fine and talented party. 154 00:06:50,200 --> 00:06:54,680 Speaker 1: Looking man he's eating. And now we are joined by another. 155 00:06:54,440 --> 00:06:58,039 Speaker 3: Fine, fine man that I met to the wires of 156 00:06:58,080 --> 00:07:01,640 Speaker 3: the Internet, or the wireless wires of the internet, actually 157 00:07:01,680 --> 00:07:06,080 Speaker 3: through a a Good Mom listener. Shout out to Campbell 158 00:07:06,320 --> 00:07:09,720 Speaker 3: and Shannon who came to one of our play parties 159 00:07:09,760 --> 00:07:14,120 Speaker 3: early on. Anyway, today we have Michael, the founder and 160 00:07:14,200 --> 00:07:15,600 Speaker 3: creative director of the play. 161 00:07:16,200 --> 00:07:17,040 Speaker 4: Thank you for having me. 162 00:07:17,440 --> 00:07:20,240 Speaker 3: It's the largest West Coast sex party there is. 163 00:07:20,640 --> 00:07:22,360 Speaker 4: Hey, thank you very much. 164 00:07:22,400 --> 00:07:22,960 Speaker 1: That's a big deal. 165 00:07:23,040 --> 00:07:24,000 Speaker 4: It's an honor to be here. 166 00:07:24,120 --> 00:07:26,080 Speaker 3: It's very nice to have you. Thank you for sitting 167 00:07:26,080 --> 00:07:26,720 Speaker 3: through our spiel. 168 00:07:27,000 --> 00:07:28,560 Speaker 4: Yeah, I was like, I don't know if I'm supposed 169 00:07:28,560 --> 00:07:30,800 Speaker 4: to come in or I was just like, you'll do 170 00:07:30,840 --> 00:07:35,080 Speaker 4: your thing. So I enjoyed it. You know, you said 171 00:07:35,120 --> 00:07:39,760 Speaker 4: something about was it Lola Jessica Rabbit? 172 00:07:39,920 --> 00:07:40,200 Speaker 3: Yes? 173 00:07:41,480 --> 00:07:44,760 Speaker 4: Is Jessica Rabbit white and Lola Bunny black? 174 00:07:45,320 --> 00:07:46,160 Speaker 1: I would assume so. 175 00:07:47,120 --> 00:07:50,000 Speaker 3: I think so, Lola was obviously a fair skinning rabbit 176 00:07:51,440 --> 00:07:53,840 Speaker 3: and and I mean Lola. 177 00:07:53,840 --> 00:07:55,800 Speaker 1: Wait wait, Jessica Jessica was white. 178 00:07:55,880 --> 00:07:59,560 Speaker 3: Jessica was white right here, she was shaped like a 179 00:07:59,600 --> 00:08:00,360 Speaker 3: woman of color. 180 00:08:00,760 --> 00:08:02,160 Speaker 4: Lola was Lolla Bunny. 181 00:08:02,240 --> 00:08:05,280 Speaker 3: Lolla Bunny is bugs Bunny's girlfriend in space Dream exactly. 182 00:08:05,320 --> 00:08:06,760 Speaker 4: And I feel like, is she was she black? 183 00:08:06,840 --> 00:08:08,600 Speaker 3: I just assume space sham she was black. I don't 184 00:08:08,640 --> 00:08:09,720 Speaker 3: remember her talking. 185 00:08:09,480 --> 00:08:11,680 Speaker 1: Though, I'm trying to remember what she looked like. 186 00:08:12,000 --> 00:08:13,680 Speaker 3: You know what's so funny, It's like when we can 187 00:08:13,720 --> 00:08:16,480 Speaker 3: identify like animal characters of animations. 188 00:08:16,600 --> 00:08:18,400 Speaker 4: I've asked black men about this, and so it's nice 189 00:08:18,400 --> 00:08:19,960 Speaker 4: to ask, do you friends has. 190 00:08:19,880 --> 00:08:21,160 Speaker 1: To do with the voice too? Yeah? 191 00:08:21,400 --> 00:08:25,960 Speaker 3: Like Goofy Goofy was obviously the black Disney character. I 192 00:08:26,000 --> 00:08:28,360 Speaker 3: would say so, yes, yes, because he was like dancing good? 193 00:08:30,160 --> 00:08:31,160 Speaker 3: Would they name him Goofy? 194 00:08:31,160 --> 00:08:31,320 Speaker 4: Though? 195 00:08:31,360 --> 00:08:32,360 Speaker 1: Why you gotta be goofy? 196 00:08:32,520 --> 00:08:33,600 Speaker 3: Racism? 197 00:08:33,640 --> 00:08:36,000 Speaker 1: Why did they gotta be Goofy? Wait? Do you remember when? 198 00:08:36,559 --> 00:08:38,880 Speaker 3: Do you guys remember when this was like a highlight 199 00:08:38,960 --> 00:08:42,000 Speaker 3: when the Atlanta episode when they did that whole story 200 00:08:42,000 --> 00:08:43,320 Speaker 3: about Goofy, but then it was not real. 201 00:08:43,400 --> 00:08:45,920 Speaker 4: It wasn't even real, and I was so engaged. 202 00:08:45,960 --> 00:08:48,080 Speaker 3: I was like, no wait, my mind was blown that 203 00:08:48,280 --> 00:08:50,320 Speaker 3: he would do this to us because I was totally 204 00:08:50,840 --> 00:08:52,880 Speaker 3: like researching, like, oh my god, who knew this was 205 00:08:52,920 --> 00:08:54,280 Speaker 3: the backstory of Goofy. 206 00:08:54,800 --> 00:08:56,120 Speaker 4: A Goofy movie and everything. 207 00:08:56,280 --> 00:08:58,520 Speaker 1: Yeah, he's so tricky, that guy. I love him. He's 208 00:08:58,520 --> 00:08:59,120 Speaker 1: so talented. 209 00:08:59,200 --> 00:09:01,320 Speaker 3: I do Can you come Donald Glover? 210 00:09:01,360 --> 00:09:01,760 Speaker 1: Can you come on? 211 00:09:01,800 --> 00:09:04,600 Speaker 3: Good moms? I love me so Donald God, he's such 212 00:09:04,600 --> 00:09:07,440 Speaker 3: an artist. I love him a little weirdo making up 213 00:09:07,480 --> 00:09:10,640 Speaker 3: stories that I thought were real trickster that Michael Jackson one, 214 00:09:15,000 --> 00:09:16,560 Speaker 3: and then also the Tyler Perry one. 215 00:09:18,120 --> 00:09:19,840 Speaker 4: You signed on see the episode you know you tune 216 00:09:19,840 --> 00:09:21,439 Speaker 4: in the episode. I was like, where is this going? 217 00:09:21,720 --> 00:09:26,160 Speaker 4: Because at one point it was like, you know, one 218 00:09:26,200 --> 00:09:27,959 Speaker 4: episode after the other was like making sense. There was 219 00:09:28,000 --> 00:09:30,040 Speaker 4: a story being told, and then like one season like 220 00:09:30,040 --> 00:09:33,559 Speaker 4: fuck that, we're just ye or in the middle of 221 00:09:33,600 --> 00:09:34,960 Speaker 4: a season we'll just be like, you know what, the 222 00:09:35,000 --> 00:09:36,000 Speaker 4: Goofy Michael. 223 00:09:35,800 --> 00:09:40,080 Speaker 3: Jackson, Yeah it's over. But you know what, I love 224 00:09:40,160 --> 00:09:42,400 Speaker 3: that because I think he reminds us to play. I 225 00:09:42,400 --> 00:09:44,440 Speaker 3: think he reminds us to play in the creative and 226 00:09:44,720 --> 00:09:49,680 Speaker 3: see what let's go. And it's true, like I think 227 00:09:49,720 --> 00:09:53,800 Speaker 3: as adults were so so deep and fucking survival because 228 00:09:53,840 --> 00:09:55,920 Speaker 3: we lived in Los Angeles and America where you know, 229 00:09:55,960 --> 00:10:00,000 Speaker 3: capitalism is the world. But it's like, remember your little usage, 230 00:10:00,040 --> 00:10:02,440 Speaker 3: just writing your journal and scrapbook and post things on 231 00:10:02,480 --> 00:10:05,160 Speaker 3: your fucking wall with tape and just do weird shit 232 00:10:05,240 --> 00:10:07,760 Speaker 3: just because you didn't have anything else to do. There's 233 00:10:07,760 --> 00:10:10,559 Speaker 3: no Internet. And now we're just so deep in our 234 00:10:10,679 --> 00:10:13,000 Speaker 3: like nine to fives or whatever the fuck we're doing, 235 00:10:13,000 --> 00:10:14,160 Speaker 3: that we forget to play. 236 00:10:14,840 --> 00:10:17,000 Speaker 1: And I'm like, I'm over that. I want to just 237 00:10:17,040 --> 00:10:17,520 Speaker 1: have fun. 238 00:10:18,080 --> 00:10:20,880 Speaker 4: That's why we call it the play. It was like 239 00:10:20,960 --> 00:10:25,600 Speaker 4: this quadruple on Tendra when we first started in the 240 00:10:25,720 --> 00:10:27,480 Speaker 4: ethical non monogamous space. 241 00:10:27,800 --> 00:10:30,120 Speaker 3: You know, tell us more, this is Michael, and we said, 242 00:10:30,120 --> 00:10:33,360 Speaker 3: we mentioned he has the biggest, largest, most grand sex 243 00:10:33,400 --> 00:10:35,760 Speaker 3: party on the West Coast. I know because I went recently. 244 00:10:36,160 --> 00:10:38,640 Speaker 3: But tell us your journey into the play and how 245 00:10:38,679 --> 00:10:40,319 Speaker 3: you came to be the founder of the play. 246 00:10:40,480 --> 00:10:46,440 Speaker 4: Oh wow, okay, yeah, so it started with, oh, let's 247 00:10:46,520 --> 00:10:49,679 Speaker 4: get to where we started the non monogamy. Like, there's 248 00:10:49,720 --> 00:10:55,000 Speaker 4: the real story my wife went to At the time 249 00:10:55,040 --> 00:10:58,960 Speaker 4: we were dating. We're like boyfriend and girlfriend, and she 250 00:10:59,080 --> 00:11:03,520 Speaker 4: had gone to Paris to visit uh some family. I 251 00:11:03,600 --> 00:11:05,960 Speaker 4: met her in San Francisco. I was working for Google. 252 00:11:06,520 --> 00:11:08,760 Speaker 4: I met her on the dance floor. One night stand 253 00:11:08,800 --> 00:11:14,760 Speaker 4: turned to life. So and so we moved to LA together. 254 00:11:15,200 --> 00:11:16,719 Speaker 4: You know, I'm like, I'm from LA. I don't want 255 00:11:16,720 --> 00:11:18,200 Speaker 4: to be in the Bay. I'm like living I'm from 256 00:11:18,280 --> 00:11:19,679 Speaker 4: First off, you're from LA and you start living in 257 00:11:19,720 --> 00:11:21,960 Speaker 4: the Bay, It's like, this is not California. That's not 258 00:11:22,040 --> 00:11:25,400 Speaker 4: like California. I know, you know, So you know, I 259 00:11:25,440 --> 00:11:28,120 Speaker 4: go to we start living each other in l A 260 00:11:28,280 --> 00:11:33,680 Speaker 4: and like this is awesome and in the Bay. To 261 00:11:33,760 --> 00:11:35,960 Speaker 4: be fair, like I was dating a lot. I had 262 00:11:36,000 --> 00:11:39,760 Speaker 4: broken up with I'm sorry with me and my past X. 263 00:11:39,840 --> 00:11:41,960 Speaker 4: Let me not because she has a podcast too, So 264 00:11:42,120 --> 00:11:44,200 Speaker 4: let me like me and my X. We broke up 265 00:11:44,200 --> 00:11:50,520 Speaker 4: with each other. Decision. And so after that, I was like, 266 00:11:50,559 --> 00:11:54,200 Speaker 4: look i am I'm like done lying to women. I'm 267 00:11:54,240 --> 00:11:55,320 Speaker 4: just like I'm gonna date. 268 00:11:55,679 --> 00:11:57,680 Speaker 3: And did you cheat in that relationship? 269 00:11:57,920 --> 00:12:01,080 Speaker 4: I did cheat in that relationship? And and then and 270 00:12:01,120 --> 00:12:04,640 Speaker 4: so we broke up and and I told her recently 271 00:12:04,679 --> 00:12:06,199 Speaker 4: that I cheated. She's like, you cheated. I was like, 272 00:12:06,240 --> 00:12:09,680 Speaker 4: I thought this was the known but that's whatever I thought. Yeah, 273 00:12:09,679 --> 00:12:12,280 Speaker 4: I thought that was like the whole. So so then 274 00:12:12,440 --> 00:12:14,000 Speaker 4: I dated like a bunch of women at the same time. 275 00:12:14,040 --> 00:12:15,480 Speaker 4: But then my thing at that time was like, we're 276 00:12:15,520 --> 00:12:17,840 Speaker 4: not lying anymore, so like, are you talking to other women? 277 00:12:17,920 --> 00:12:21,160 Speaker 4: Like yes, like I think I know where you're going. 278 00:12:21,200 --> 00:12:23,480 Speaker 4: I am fucking other women, you know. So like, if 279 00:12:23,480 --> 00:12:25,160 Speaker 4: you still want to do this, I have a great 280 00:12:25,240 --> 00:12:29,200 Speaker 4: date idea, you know. So it worked and then uh 281 00:12:29,240 --> 00:12:30,880 Speaker 4: and not it worked. It was like it felt better 282 00:12:30,960 --> 00:12:33,600 Speaker 4: being in these relationships just being honest, you know, cause 283 00:12:33,600 --> 00:12:35,760 Speaker 4: I think that's what people want anyways, just honesty and 284 00:12:35,800 --> 00:12:38,040 Speaker 4: that people can feel when you're lying or you're not 285 00:12:38,080 --> 00:12:38,760 Speaker 4: living your truth. 286 00:12:39,200 --> 00:12:39,280 Speaker 1: Uh. 287 00:12:39,400 --> 00:12:43,439 Speaker 4: So then she was one of the women I was dating. 288 00:12:43,679 --> 00:12:46,000 Speaker 4: And then I moved to LA and she was like, 289 00:12:46,000 --> 00:12:47,120 Speaker 4: you know what, I'm gonna look for a job in 290 00:12:47,200 --> 00:12:50,600 Speaker 4: LA as well. Finds a job in LA. And I'm like, well, 291 00:12:50,640 --> 00:12:53,840 Speaker 4: let's move in together. She's like, if we're moving in together, 292 00:12:53,880 --> 00:12:55,680 Speaker 4: then we're a boyfriend a girlfriend. I was like, all right, 293 00:12:55,960 --> 00:12:59,199 Speaker 4: let's go, you know, and and you know, don't get 294 00:12:59,200 --> 00:13:02,120 Speaker 4: me wrong, there's like the beautiful things that really attracted 295 00:13:02,120 --> 00:13:04,160 Speaker 4: me to her. It didn't take long, I think because 296 00:13:04,160 --> 00:13:06,640 Speaker 4: I dated so many women, it was easy to like 297 00:13:06,760 --> 00:13:08,600 Speaker 4: know that she checks so many boxes, like we can, 298 00:13:08,640 --> 00:13:09,240 Speaker 4: I can rock with this. 299 00:13:09,400 --> 00:13:11,120 Speaker 3: There's a lot, but there's seven other bitches not checking 300 00:13:11,160 --> 00:13:12,960 Speaker 3: the boxes. You're like, you know what you're winning. 301 00:13:13,480 --> 00:13:15,320 Speaker 4: You know, you got two boxes, you got three boxes, 302 00:13:15,360 --> 00:13:17,840 Speaker 4: you got a lot of seven boxes, you know. But 303 00:13:18,040 --> 00:13:22,320 Speaker 4: point is we're dating. And then she goes to Paris 304 00:13:22,360 --> 00:13:24,760 Speaker 4: to visit her friend, like her family or like sister's 305 00:13:24,760 --> 00:13:28,520 Speaker 4: wedding or something. And during that time, you know, there 306 00:13:28,600 --> 00:13:31,760 Speaker 4: was some phone calls, right, and so I cheated a 307 00:13:31,840 --> 00:13:32,480 Speaker 4: phone calls. 308 00:13:34,440 --> 00:13:38,199 Speaker 1: A phone call. You made the phone calls? What they 309 00:13:38,200 --> 00:13:38,520 Speaker 1: called you? 310 00:13:38,679 --> 00:13:47,120 Speaker 4: I used my phone. Okay, don't phone town. You know, 311 00:13:47,480 --> 00:13:51,800 Speaker 4: at that time of my maturity, you know, basically, you know, 312 00:13:51,960 --> 00:13:54,040 Speaker 4: I cheated while she was out of town. And then 313 00:13:54,120 --> 00:13:57,719 Speaker 4: she came back and like I didn't try to even hide, 314 00:13:57,800 --> 00:13:59,600 Speaker 4: like I didn't really try to hide it. Yeah, exactly, 315 00:13:59,679 --> 00:14:02,079 Speaker 4: she was it's like something is up, you know, and 316 00:14:02,160 --> 00:14:04,680 Speaker 4: she like there was like little things where I replaced 317 00:14:04,679 --> 00:14:06,880 Speaker 4: the condom that were like near the bed, but it 318 00:14:06,920 --> 00:14:09,160 Speaker 4: wasn't the same brand. It was a sloppy you know, 319 00:14:09,200 --> 00:14:12,199 Speaker 4: it's just really sloppy. You know. I didn't even delete 320 00:14:12,240 --> 00:14:14,280 Speaker 4: the text messages. It was just it was like, looking back, 321 00:14:14,600 --> 00:14:20,120 Speaker 4: it was sloppy, but it was meant to happen. So 322 00:14:20,440 --> 00:14:25,080 Speaker 4: she she catches me, and we're about to have that argument. 323 00:14:25,440 --> 00:14:27,280 Speaker 4: You know, it's like you feel it right. And I 324 00:14:27,400 --> 00:14:31,120 Speaker 4: used to be a yoga teacher meditation coach in Houston, 325 00:14:31,520 --> 00:14:35,040 Speaker 4: and I was like, hey, instead of like where we're 326 00:14:35,080 --> 00:14:37,080 Speaker 4: about to go with this, let's just like meditate and 327 00:14:37,160 --> 00:14:40,360 Speaker 4: then really have this conversation. You know, and my brothers 328 00:14:40,400 --> 00:14:41,840 Speaker 4: that's how you call stalin play. 329 00:14:44,040 --> 00:14:45,800 Speaker 1: It's quite a life google meditation. 330 00:14:48,920 --> 00:14:51,080 Speaker 4: Yeah, but it was just one of those things like 331 00:14:51,840 --> 00:14:53,720 Speaker 4: let's really assess our feelings because this is going to 332 00:14:53,760 --> 00:14:55,400 Speaker 4: be the conversations that's going to define if we're going 333 00:14:55,440 --> 00:14:59,120 Speaker 4: to be together or not. Right, And and I had 334 00:14:59,160 --> 00:15:02,520 Speaker 4: a chance to really just drop in too, like you know, 335 00:15:02,640 --> 00:15:04,920 Speaker 4: why did I cheat? You know, it's like I I 336 00:15:05,360 --> 00:15:10,160 Speaker 4: really love this woman, but why why why am I cheating? Then? 337 00:15:10,400 --> 00:15:12,880 Speaker 4: Looking back, like have I cheated on like every woman 338 00:15:12,920 --> 00:15:14,920 Speaker 4: I've been with? You? Know and and and not so 339 00:15:15,040 --> 00:15:17,600 Speaker 4: much like physical, Like it's the mental, the emotional. You know, 340 00:15:17,640 --> 00:15:20,040 Speaker 4: you have like work wives, you know, like what the 341 00:15:20,080 --> 00:15:22,640 Speaker 4: fuck is that? And so you're doing all of these 342 00:15:22,800 --> 00:15:25,320 Speaker 4: other types of cheating. So I felt like there was 343 00:15:25,440 --> 00:15:29,480 Speaker 4: never a woman that that was completely the center of 344 00:15:29,640 --> 00:15:32,680 Speaker 4: my attention and I gave her my all in a sense, 345 00:15:32,880 --> 00:15:34,280 Speaker 4: and or she filled up my cup. 346 00:15:34,360 --> 00:15:37,640 Speaker 3: You have relationship? Yeah sure, I just made that. 347 00:15:38,080 --> 00:15:41,080 Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean I get that, the filling up. 348 00:15:41,080 --> 00:15:43,480 Speaker 2: You're like, not, she might have checked all those seven boxes, 349 00:15:43,520 --> 00:15:48,440 Speaker 2: but there's still there's still possible for one person to 350 00:15:49,240 --> 00:15:50,080 Speaker 2: discover new boxes. 351 00:15:50,240 --> 00:15:52,400 Speaker 4: We're gonna we're gonna get into this as the conversation goes, 352 00:15:52,440 --> 00:15:55,280 Speaker 4: because this is a big part of like ethical non monogamy. 353 00:15:55,960 --> 00:15:59,120 Speaker 4: So I just told her, I was like, look, baby, 354 00:15:59,200 --> 00:16:01,640 Speaker 4: like I love you, like I really love you, Like 355 00:16:01,840 --> 00:16:04,480 Speaker 4: I love how we live together, I love being with you. 356 00:16:04,600 --> 00:16:09,600 Speaker 4: I just just all the things, you know. But I've 357 00:16:09,760 --> 00:16:13,080 Speaker 4: also just had these experiences like at that time, I 358 00:16:13,160 --> 00:16:16,440 Speaker 4: had like five threesomes before that, So I was like, 359 00:16:16,600 --> 00:16:19,080 Speaker 4: there's just sexual experience that I've had that I want 360 00:16:19,120 --> 00:16:21,120 Speaker 4: to have now. I'd love to have them with you. 361 00:16:21,680 --> 00:16:23,720 Speaker 4: But like if You're for taking that off the table, 362 00:16:23,880 --> 00:16:25,520 Speaker 4: Like there's always going to be part of me that 363 00:16:25,600 --> 00:16:28,000 Speaker 4: wants to try that, you know. And I think also 364 00:16:28,120 --> 00:16:35,040 Speaker 4: because I had been with so many different types of women, 365 00:16:35,400 --> 00:16:39,960 Speaker 4: right like I appreciate all the flavors, you know, It's 366 00:16:40,000 --> 00:16:41,440 Speaker 4: not like the one is better than the other. It's 367 00:16:41,520 --> 00:16:44,760 Speaker 4: just like, hey, there's you know, I've experienced it and 368 00:16:44,880 --> 00:16:49,360 Speaker 4: love that was awesome. So I just told her. I 369 00:16:49,400 --> 00:16:52,160 Speaker 4: was like, you know, there's I would like to explore, 370 00:16:52,240 --> 00:16:54,520 Speaker 4: like would you be down to have a threesome? You know. 371 00:16:54,600 --> 00:16:56,280 Speaker 4: It wasn't even like let's be dominogmous, like would you 372 00:16:56,280 --> 00:16:57,040 Speaker 4: be down to have a threesome? 373 00:16:57,120 --> 00:16:58,880 Speaker 1: So you went from I cheated on you, Let's have three? 374 00:16:59,200 --> 00:17:03,360 Speaker 4: Yeah. I was like, look, I'm trying, I know. I 375 00:17:03,440 --> 00:17:06,560 Speaker 4: mean it was like more of just like I'm I'm 376 00:17:06,640 --> 00:17:09,320 Speaker 4: dropping the Prince Charming act. That was the big thing 377 00:17:09,359 --> 00:17:11,120 Speaker 4: for her. She's like, finally, just tell me the truth. 378 00:17:11,160 --> 00:17:13,000 Speaker 4: I don't care what the truth is, Like what is it? 379 00:17:13,119 --> 00:17:13,920 Speaker 4: What are you trying to hide? 380 00:17:13,960 --> 00:17:14,440 Speaker 1: Like what is this? 381 00:17:14,720 --> 00:17:16,600 Speaker 4: Stop the Prince charming bullshit. So I was like, okay, 382 00:17:16,720 --> 00:17:19,720 Speaker 4: like look I want to I want to try this stuff. 383 00:17:20,040 --> 00:17:22,920 Speaker 4: You know, I'm going to try these experiences. And she 384 00:17:23,280 --> 00:17:26,960 Speaker 4: she was like, you know what, now that we're being honest, 385 00:17:27,400 --> 00:17:31,520 Speaker 4: you know me too, you know exactly. So she was like, 386 00:17:31,680 --> 00:17:36,040 Speaker 4: I've actually wanted to you know, I've always had like 387 00:17:36,119 --> 00:17:38,440 Speaker 4: this thing where I've wanted to try playing with women. 388 00:17:38,720 --> 00:17:42,960 Speaker 4: And I was like, excuse me, like I think based 389 00:17:42,960 --> 00:17:45,000 Speaker 4: off what you said and what I said, I think 390 00:17:45,040 --> 00:17:48,840 Speaker 4: there's something there. So we had, uh, you know, we 391 00:17:48,920 --> 00:17:52,920 Speaker 4: had a threesome and you know, just like everybody's first 392 00:17:52,920 --> 00:17:57,159 Speaker 4: three some, it's super awkward. It's like there's you know, 393 00:17:57,200 --> 00:17:59,000 Speaker 4: there was times where we just paused in it and 394 00:17:59,000 --> 00:18:01,520 Speaker 4: it was like, hey at it, excuse us, we need 395 00:18:01,600 --> 00:18:04,200 Speaker 4: to talk about something, you know in the closet. You know, no, 396 00:18:04,200 --> 00:18:06,440 Speaker 4: I mean just yeah, like really like just outside we 397 00:18:06,480 --> 00:18:07,920 Speaker 4: went in the living room, like left her, left the 398 00:18:07,960 --> 00:18:10,000 Speaker 4: other person in the room. It was just like, hey, like, 399 00:18:10,520 --> 00:18:12,040 Speaker 4: you know, can you not kiss her as much? 400 00:18:12,160 --> 00:18:14,840 Speaker 3: You know, I've taken a lot of meetings in the closet, 401 00:18:15,000 --> 00:18:15,560 Speaker 3: like we'll. 402 00:18:15,359 --> 00:18:18,000 Speaker 4: Be right back, yep. And and it's it's fine. It's 403 00:18:18,080 --> 00:18:20,720 Speaker 4: that you have those check ins. So it happened. It 404 00:18:20,960 --> 00:18:24,600 Speaker 4: was it was fine, and that person actually was in 405 00:18:24,840 --> 00:18:27,159 Speaker 4: like visiting, you know, so we had like another night, 406 00:18:27,240 --> 00:18:28,920 Speaker 4: like like we get to try it again, and like 407 00:18:29,040 --> 00:18:32,359 Speaker 4: this time was within the boundaries. And then after that, 408 00:18:32,480 --> 00:18:34,560 Speaker 4: you know, I took them both to the Gaddy after 409 00:18:34,640 --> 00:18:36,960 Speaker 4: that and just had like a nice evening to where 410 00:18:37,320 --> 00:18:39,240 Speaker 4: they got to talk and hang out and chill more, 411 00:18:39,280 --> 00:18:40,520 Speaker 4: and they just became really good friends. 412 00:18:40,600 --> 00:18:41,440 Speaker 1: These are people. 413 00:18:41,680 --> 00:18:43,200 Speaker 3: Did you source the third person? 414 00:18:43,600 --> 00:18:45,200 Speaker 4: Yes, it was. It was an ex girlfriend of mine. 415 00:18:45,320 --> 00:18:47,320 Speaker 3: Oh wow, that she's a break She's she's strong. 416 00:18:47,520 --> 00:18:50,960 Speaker 4: I mean it was an ex girl. Like there's a 417 00:18:51,040 --> 00:18:53,399 Speaker 4: whole story of how that even happened. It was like, uh, 418 00:18:53,720 --> 00:18:56,800 Speaker 4: you know, it worked out. It worked out. Me and 419 00:18:56,920 --> 00:18:59,320 Speaker 4: that ex girlfriend were like, she I wanted to have 420 00:18:59,400 --> 00:19:00,760 Speaker 4: a three some, Like this was back when I was 421 00:19:00,800 --> 00:19:02,800 Speaker 4: having those five threesomes, you know, and one of them 422 00:19:03,040 --> 00:19:04,960 Speaker 4: was one of my best friends was in town and 423 00:19:05,000 --> 00:19:06,840 Speaker 4: she's like, I've always wanted to have a three some 424 00:19:07,000 --> 00:19:10,040 Speaker 4: with two guys. And I was like, were when I 425 00:19:10,119 --> 00:19:14,080 Speaker 4: think threesome? I wasn't thinking that. And then I was like, Okay, 426 00:19:14,080 --> 00:19:15,920 Speaker 4: well that's my that's my brother. You know, if there's 427 00:19:15,920 --> 00:19:18,119 Speaker 4: anybody that I would do it with, it's him, you know. 428 00:19:19,080 --> 00:19:21,399 Speaker 4: So we ended up we did that and She's like, 429 00:19:21,440 --> 00:19:22,720 Speaker 4: oh well, I oh you one and. 430 00:19:24,640 --> 00:19:25,000 Speaker 1: Get back. 431 00:19:25,440 --> 00:19:27,280 Speaker 2: Well, you know, well, you know what I would say, 432 00:19:27,840 --> 00:19:29,800 Speaker 2: I'm for the people that are the men that are listening. 433 00:19:29,960 --> 00:19:31,760 Speaker 2: I think that this is I'm really happy that you're 434 00:19:31,760 --> 00:19:34,960 Speaker 2: sharing this because I think that it's I think it 435 00:19:35,080 --> 00:19:38,399 Speaker 2: worked for you. But historically a man's bringing in his 436 00:19:38,600 --> 00:19:41,160 Speaker 2: ex girlfriend to fuck his current girlfriend. 437 00:19:40,880 --> 00:19:41,760 Speaker 1: Might not go well. 438 00:19:42,160 --> 00:19:44,400 Speaker 4: So absolutely use your. 439 00:19:44,359 --> 00:19:45,440 Speaker 1: Discernment, fellas. 440 00:19:45,760 --> 00:19:48,280 Speaker 2: But I'm happy that your girl, and obviously you guys 441 00:19:48,359 --> 00:19:50,840 Speaker 2: built this beautiful platform is more open than maybe you 442 00:19:51,000 --> 00:19:51,960 Speaker 2: even could have dreamed of. 443 00:19:52,280 --> 00:19:57,400 Speaker 4: It's it's just my literally my wildest fantasy. The things 444 00:19:57,520 --> 00:19:59,159 Speaker 4: I couldn't even imagine, some of the things that are 445 00:19:59,160 --> 00:20:01,239 Speaker 4: happening now. And it's just like, you know, when you're 446 00:20:01,240 --> 00:20:05,000 Speaker 4: starting to live your truth, you know. So after that, 447 00:20:05,440 --> 00:20:07,320 Speaker 4: a couple we met another couple who was like, hey, 448 00:20:07,359 --> 00:20:08,680 Speaker 4: have you guys ever been to I told like I 449 00:20:08,760 --> 00:20:10,080 Speaker 4: was telling my friend. I was like, oh my god, bro, 450 00:20:10,240 --> 00:20:12,480 Speaker 4: like we have the three He was like, bro, I 451 00:20:12,520 --> 00:20:14,440 Speaker 4: go to play parties. I was like, what are you 452 00:20:14,480 --> 00:20:16,960 Speaker 4: talking about? Like a play party? What are you talking about? 453 00:20:16,960 --> 00:20:19,880 Speaker 4: You know, He's like sex parties. I was like, I mean, 454 00:20:20,280 --> 00:20:21,600 Speaker 4: what do you you know, like, what do you mean 455 00:20:21,680 --> 00:20:23,480 Speaker 4: sex parties? He's like, just come with us. So we 456 00:20:23,560 --> 00:20:26,080 Speaker 4: go to this sex party. It's a hotel takeover and 457 00:20:26,440 --> 00:20:29,960 Speaker 4: the hotel is like I mean it's in like Palm Springs, 458 00:20:30,359 --> 00:20:32,080 Speaker 4: you know, and they're taking over like Hilton, so it's 459 00:20:32,119 --> 00:20:35,800 Speaker 4: like four hundred rooms and like, you know, no, let 460 00:20:35,800 --> 00:20:43,440 Speaker 4: me not Hilton. I don't know. Yeah, yeah, there was 461 00:20:43,520 --> 00:20:46,200 Speaker 4: a hotel in Palm Springs, right, So we go and 462 00:20:46,960 --> 00:20:49,680 Speaker 4: you know, we get there and the pool party is 463 00:20:49,840 --> 00:20:53,159 Speaker 4: like crazier than any Vegas party I've seen, right, Like 464 00:20:53,240 --> 00:20:57,199 Speaker 4: this is all clothing optional. You know, what's happening at 465 00:20:57,240 --> 00:21:00,440 Speaker 4: the side of the pool is just just the whole 466 00:21:00,840 --> 00:21:02,720 Speaker 4: scene was just like my mind was blown. I was like, 467 00:21:02,760 --> 00:21:06,520 Speaker 4: this is possible. Yeah, of course we went with that 468 00:21:06,600 --> 00:21:08,160 Speaker 4: in that other couple. You know, they were like, let's 469 00:21:08,160 --> 00:21:09,920 Speaker 4: show you and like we're gonna to introduce you some 470 00:21:10,359 --> 00:21:11,840 Speaker 4: of our friends. So I went and I was like, 471 00:21:11,880 --> 00:21:15,320 Speaker 4: oh my god, my mind was blown. But you know, 472 00:21:15,440 --> 00:21:17,560 Speaker 4: I also when I came back to LA I worked 473 00:21:17,560 --> 00:21:20,119 Speaker 4: in television and film, was working you know, I produced 474 00:21:20,160 --> 00:21:24,919 Speaker 4: super Bowl commercials, worked at different shows. You know, I'm 475 00:21:24,920 --> 00:21:26,800 Speaker 4: not in a name drop, but I did my thing 476 00:21:26,880 --> 00:21:30,520 Speaker 4: in the industry. And I looked at the party and 477 00:21:30,560 --> 00:21:34,800 Speaker 4: I was like, this is actually not that you guys 478 00:21:34,800 --> 00:21:37,880 Speaker 4: aren't doing anything right, Like you guys are just hosting 479 00:21:37,920 --> 00:21:40,960 Speaker 4: a party and telling people they can have sex. That's 480 00:21:41,520 --> 00:21:44,640 Speaker 4: basically what's going on here. Like we got alcohol over here. Yeah, 481 00:21:44,680 --> 00:21:46,520 Speaker 4: you got a DJ, and maybe you're saying there's a 482 00:21:46,600 --> 00:21:49,400 Speaker 4: theme and then you're saying, okay, now get out there 483 00:21:49,760 --> 00:21:54,520 Speaker 4: and play, you know, and uh, you know. Then I 484 00:21:54,640 --> 00:21:56,600 Speaker 4: was like, Okay, well maybe that's it's just that style, 485 00:21:57,000 --> 00:21:58,560 Speaker 4: you know. And so then I came back to LA 486 00:21:58,560 --> 00:21:59,560 Speaker 4: and I was like, well, let me go to more 487 00:21:59,560 --> 00:22:01,399 Speaker 4: play party. So I go to some in like the 488 00:22:01,480 --> 00:22:04,080 Speaker 4: Hollywood Hills and things of that nature, and it's the 489 00:22:04,119 --> 00:22:08,679 Speaker 4: same thing. It's like, Okay, nice house and you know, music, 490 00:22:08,840 --> 00:22:12,520 Speaker 4: maybe a DJ, you know, maybe some stuff from Costco 491 00:22:14,119 --> 00:22:18,320 Speaker 4: and you know, they they'll they may do some lighting stuff, 492 00:22:18,720 --> 00:22:20,919 Speaker 4: you know, but even the lighting isn't it's not it's 493 00:22:20,960 --> 00:22:22,879 Speaker 4: not like this right, like like we put out the 494 00:22:22,960 --> 00:22:25,879 Speaker 4: vibe exactly. And I was like, yo, y'all, y'all are 495 00:22:26,000 --> 00:22:30,600 Speaker 4: like is anybody really looking at the science behind this, 496 00:22:31,080 --> 00:22:35,639 Speaker 4: you know? And and I think I've always been into 497 00:22:36,400 --> 00:22:38,879 Speaker 4: just how humans connect, like the sociology you know, like 498 00:22:38,960 --> 00:22:42,760 Speaker 4: if you have five people talking, eventually two people you know, 499 00:22:42,840 --> 00:22:45,200 Speaker 4: three breakoff and two breakoff. You know, like how you 500 00:22:45,400 --> 00:22:51,600 Speaker 4: really connect people and how people connect. So uh, I 501 00:22:51,680 --> 00:22:52,879 Speaker 4: was like, you know what, I think we can just 502 00:22:52,920 --> 00:22:54,200 Speaker 4: do this better. So we went like a year of 503 00:22:54,240 --> 00:22:56,840 Speaker 4: going to all the parties. I was like, let me 504 00:22:56,880 --> 00:22:58,879 Speaker 4: just let's just do this better, like, let's just do it. 505 00:23:00,040 --> 00:23:02,800 Speaker 4: And we were talking like okay, so if you want 506 00:23:02,840 --> 00:23:04,880 Speaker 4: to do this, my wife, and this is the best part. 507 00:23:05,000 --> 00:23:06,679 Speaker 4: My wife was the one who was like, if we're 508 00:23:06,720 --> 00:23:08,000 Speaker 4: gonna do this, like this is where I put my 509 00:23:08,040 --> 00:23:10,399 Speaker 4: foot down, everybody's got to be tested. I was like, baby, 510 00:23:10,760 --> 00:23:15,720 Speaker 4: nobody's doing that, like nobody's requiring testing, you know. And 511 00:23:15,840 --> 00:23:18,200 Speaker 4: she's like yeah, but I'm not gonna play with anybody 512 00:23:18,280 --> 00:23:18,960 Speaker 4: that's not tested. 513 00:23:19,680 --> 00:23:23,399 Speaker 1: I was like, women, Oh, this is so annoymous pH 514 00:23:23,600 --> 00:23:28,160 Speaker 1: balance matters. Absolutely, these are very sensitive and if. 515 00:23:28,040 --> 00:23:29,840 Speaker 3: You want to get to them after this party, my nay, 516 00:23:30,040 --> 00:23:31,119 Speaker 3: you might as well go. 517 00:23:31,240 --> 00:23:33,440 Speaker 4: It's just like what you know, when it comes to 518 00:23:33,560 --> 00:23:38,600 Speaker 4: like things, I'm asking right, like okay, babe, like you're like, 519 00:23:38,800 --> 00:23:40,280 Speaker 4: is this the the for me to get to the 520 00:23:40,359 --> 00:23:42,239 Speaker 4: yes is everybody get tested. And then when you think 521 00:23:42,280 --> 00:23:45,199 Speaker 4: about it more, it's like, you know what, Yeah, that's right, 522 00:23:45,240 --> 00:23:47,600 Speaker 4: We're gonna be the party where everybody has to be tested. 523 00:23:47,680 --> 00:23:50,840 Speaker 3: So that was always since the founding moment of the play. 524 00:23:50,960 --> 00:23:54,760 Speaker 4: That never a moment we didn't require testing, you know, 525 00:23:54,800 --> 00:23:56,159 Speaker 4: And that's how we came into this, and so we 526 00:23:56,240 --> 00:23:58,560 Speaker 4: were trailblazing from the jump. A lot of parties were 527 00:23:58,680 --> 00:23:59,199 Speaker 4: just like, you. 528 00:23:59,240 --> 00:24:00,520 Speaker 1: Know, ticket come in. 529 00:24:00,640 --> 00:24:02,760 Speaker 4: Yeah, but once you buy a ticket, is not even. 530 00:24:02,640 --> 00:24:04,280 Speaker 1: Vetting at all. I don't know if there's betting at 531 00:24:04,280 --> 00:24:04,640 Speaker 1: you're a party. 532 00:24:04,720 --> 00:24:07,240 Speaker 4: Absolutely, they just are top. 533 00:24:07,160 --> 00:24:10,159 Speaker 3: To Michael for many hours at this point, yes, exactly. 534 00:24:10,200 --> 00:24:13,159 Speaker 4: So we we have our whole processes, Like you submit 535 00:24:13,200 --> 00:24:16,480 Speaker 4: an application. You from that application, you like, maybe somebody 536 00:24:16,560 --> 00:24:18,600 Speaker 4: referred you, you know, so we like to track because 537 00:24:18,640 --> 00:24:20,600 Speaker 4: like if your friend is acting crazy, we. 538 00:24:20,600 --> 00:24:21,240 Speaker 1: Don't need you here. 539 00:24:23,400 --> 00:24:26,080 Speaker 4: Maybe if you were for somebody else, like it's one 540 00:24:26,119 --> 00:24:30,159 Speaker 4: of their referrals again, you know. So once you you 541 00:24:30,359 --> 00:24:34,600 Speaker 4: answer questions in our application, right, so those questions pop 542 00:24:34,720 --> 00:24:37,199 Speaker 4: up some red flags, right, I'm not going to say 543 00:24:37,280 --> 00:24:49,439 Speaker 4: what one of the questions is, uh, how many how 544 00:24:49,480 --> 00:24:51,639 Speaker 4: many part play party play parties have you been to 545 00:24:52,400 --> 00:24:56,200 Speaker 4: You're right, So that's one where it could potentially pop 546 00:24:56,359 --> 00:24:59,440 Speaker 4: up a red flag if you've been to none. No, 547 00:24:59,520 --> 00:25:01,920 Speaker 4: if you've been to none, like we're we're assuming you're 548 00:25:01,960 --> 00:25:04,479 Speaker 4: not right. We don't really know the culture that well, right, 549 00:25:04,560 --> 00:25:06,560 Speaker 4: so we may give you a little bit more leeway 550 00:25:06,640 --> 00:25:09,639 Speaker 4: with some of your questions. But maybe you've been to 551 00:25:09,840 --> 00:25:12,840 Speaker 4: like a bunch of play parties and then you gave 552 00:25:12,960 --> 00:25:16,080 Speaker 4: us like short answers for everything. It's like you're just 553 00:25:16,160 --> 00:25:18,040 Speaker 4: trying to get in the door. You're not like we're 554 00:25:18,040 --> 00:25:20,479 Speaker 4: asking you questions about what's your fantasy, what's your king? 555 00:25:20,520 --> 00:25:22,040 Speaker 4: Do you have a performance in mind? And if you're 556 00:25:22,119 --> 00:25:24,360 Speaker 4: like no, no to any of that, like we're here. 557 00:25:25,000 --> 00:25:27,600 Speaker 4: The play is the party for artists. It's where artists 558 00:25:27,640 --> 00:25:29,119 Speaker 4: play is one of our things. You're not just the 559 00:25:29,160 --> 00:25:33,480 Speaker 4: audience or the art. And so you know, if that's 560 00:25:33,520 --> 00:25:35,240 Speaker 4: the question that you're skipping over, and then it's like, well, 561 00:25:35,440 --> 00:25:37,720 Speaker 4: this may not be the party for you, right, So 562 00:25:39,760 --> 00:25:42,359 Speaker 4: so you have to do that the application, submit some 563 00:25:42,440 --> 00:25:46,200 Speaker 4: pictures and everything, and then we do an interview because everybody, look, 564 00:25:46,280 --> 00:25:48,359 Speaker 4: we're from LA, so you think I'm gonna trust your 565 00:25:48,359 --> 00:25:51,680 Speaker 4: little instagram picture absolutely not fame or is it just 566 00:25:51,760 --> 00:25:53,040 Speaker 4: regular call face time? 567 00:25:53,080 --> 00:25:54,760 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, show me your face. 568 00:25:54,600 --> 00:25:56,800 Speaker 4: One hundred percent. Like we're gonna figure this out real quick. 569 00:25:57,680 --> 00:26:00,480 Speaker 4: Like your personality too, because a lot of times, you know, 570 00:26:00,600 --> 00:26:03,399 Speaker 4: people look really cute and then you talk to them 571 00:26:03,440 --> 00:26:06,360 Speaker 4: and it's like this is supposed to be a conversation. 572 00:26:07,000 --> 00:26:09,240 Speaker 4: So if you want to just be cute and be quiet, 573 00:26:09,960 --> 00:26:12,680 Speaker 4: this party is about connection, So like, just be cute, 574 00:26:12,720 --> 00:26:15,399 Speaker 4: be quiet at that other party with all the rich people, 575 00:26:15,440 --> 00:26:18,080 Speaker 4: and you can just be that person there, you know, 576 00:26:18,320 --> 00:26:20,480 Speaker 4: Like what we're trying to do is create this environment 577 00:26:20,640 --> 00:26:24,240 Speaker 4: that people want to connect in. You want to talk, 578 00:26:24,400 --> 00:26:26,440 Speaker 4: and even if you're an introvert, we want to create 579 00:26:26,560 --> 00:26:30,840 Speaker 4: ways for you to connect. So the interview process, if 580 00:26:30,880 --> 00:26:33,359 Speaker 4: you pass that, then we send the invitation, then you 581 00:26:33,440 --> 00:26:36,040 Speaker 4: send the STI results, and your SEI results have to 582 00:26:36,080 --> 00:26:38,800 Speaker 4: be within three months of the party you want to attend. Now. 583 00:26:38,880 --> 00:26:40,399 Speaker 4: The reason it's three months because people are like, well 584 00:26:40,400 --> 00:26:43,320 Speaker 4: that's a lot of time, like absolutely, Like first off, 585 00:26:43,800 --> 00:26:46,639 Speaker 4: because there's other private parties and parties are starting to 586 00:26:46,840 --> 00:26:50,440 Speaker 4: require testing now, and you know, some of them making 587 00:26:50,480 --> 00:26:55,600 Speaker 4: it optional, which is just counterproductive, but some of them, 588 00:26:55,720 --> 00:26:59,320 Speaker 4: like the more private ones are making it more required 589 00:26:59,600 --> 00:27:01,240 Speaker 4: and the every one what I love is they'll be like, 590 00:27:01,280 --> 00:27:04,320 Speaker 4: hey within two weeks, right, but in this community, in 591 00:27:04,359 --> 00:27:07,359 Speaker 4: two weeks, the ship that could happen come. 592 00:27:07,240 --> 00:27:09,840 Speaker 3: On even for me when when we got ended up 593 00:27:09,840 --> 00:27:11,879 Speaker 3: going like we went very last minute and I was like, 594 00:27:11,880 --> 00:27:12,359 Speaker 3: where'd you go? 595 00:27:12,680 --> 00:27:14,399 Speaker 1: I was thinking about, like where the fuck do you 596 00:27:14,480 --> 00:27:14,840 Speaker 1: just want to go? 597 00:27:15,000 --> 00:27:16,440 Speaker 3: At first, I was like, we're not gonna be able 598 00:27:16,440 --> 00:27:18,000 Speaker 3: to go because I'm like, don't you have to wait 599 00:27:18,040 --> 00:27:18,880 Speaker 3: time to get results? 600 00:27:18,920 --> 00:27:19,120 Speaker 1: Bitch? 601 00:27:19,280 --> 00:27:22,240 Speaker 3: Guess wherever we went? That's Hollywood? Yeah, And it was 602 00:27:22,359 --> 00:27:25,159 Speaker 3: so nice. Where's the men's health clinic? It was so 603 00:27:25,359 --> 00:27:27,200 Speaker 3: nice that parking, you know, there's usually no parking in 604 00:27:27,240 --> 00:27:29,800 Speaker 3: Santa Monica. Me and Orlando went at like six pm 605 00:27:30,320 --> 00:27:33,440 Speaker 3: on a Thursday, got our results by Saturday and or 606 00:27:33,520 --> 00:27:36,680 Speaker 3: like Friday, I think Saturday, and literally they were like 607 00:27:37,280 --> 00:27:39,800 Speaker 3: pie in the shar here's your recteal swab. I was like, 608 00:27:39,880 --> 00:27:41,160 Speaker 3: what like rectal swab? 609 00:27:41,280 --> 00:27:43,000 Speaker 1: You put them in your butt? Yes, bitch? And I 610 00:27:43,240 --> 00:27:43,960 Speaker 1: was not prepared for that. 611 00:27:44,280 --> 00:27:45,920 Speaker 3: MEI they gonna find your boody on I don't know, 612 00:27:46,000 --> 00:27:48,200 Speaker 3: but you can get don Aria and who knew? But 613 00:27:48,320 --> 00:27:50,520 Speaker 3: the days now Orlando called me from the other bath 614 00:27:50,720 --> 00:27:52,159 Speaker 3: they put it in your butter. You know, you do 615 00:27:52,200 --> 00:27:55,480 Speaker 3: it yourself. Orlando calls me, like, what's what do I 616 00:27:55,600 --> 00:27:58,040 Speaker 3: do with this rectal swab? I was like, I don't know, 617 00:27:58,160 --> 00:28:00,639 Speaker 3: but in my bathroom there's directions above the toilet. He's like, 618 00:28:00,760 --> 00:28:03,359 Speaker 3: not in mind. I was like, I'll take a picture 619 00:28:03,400 --> 00:28:06,439 Speaker 3: and send it to It was like it started one 620 00:28:06,480 --> 00:28:08,960 Speaker 3: to two inches and then swab it five times. He 621 00:28:09,080 --> 00:28:10,440 Speaker 3: was like, I only got that mug around one and 622 00:28:10,480 --> 00:28:13,480 Speaker 3: a half. That's about all they're gonna get. We don't 623 00:28:13,520 --> 00:28:14,399 Speaker 3: have anything in our buttholes. 624 00:28:14,440 --> 00:28:17,320 Speaker 2: You know what I think too, Why I love this 625 00:28:17,600 --> 00:28:21,040 Speaker 2: requirement is because I think there's so much fear around 626 00:28:21,160 --> 00:28:23,840 Speaker 2: your like what potentially your status is. And I think 627 00:28:23,880 --> 00:28:27,480 Speaker 2: that it encourages people to do it. And I'm sure 628 00:28:27,520 --> 00:28:30,440 Speaker 2: there's been people that have got bad news first off, 629 00:28:31,480 --> 00:28:32,359 Speaker 2: but they don't submit it. 630 00:28:32,400 --> 00:28:34,359 Speaker 4: I'm justs assuming they're not going to Well, Eric, you're 631 00:28:34,400 --> 00:28:37,360 Speaker 4: hitting on the head, like, our goal isn't to say 632 00:28:37,440 --> 00:28:42,960 Speaker 4: that this is a STI free space. That's impossible, right. 633 00:28:43,320 --> 00:28:45,120 Speaker 4: What we're doing is saying, hey, if you want to 634 00:28:45,200 --> 00:28:48,160 Speaker 4: come into this play party culture, right, if you want 635 00:28:48,200 --> 00:28:51,640 Speaker 4: to be ethically non monogamous, then knowing your status is 636 00:28:51,720 --> 00:28:55,800 Speaker 4: the requirement. Right, So we're saying like if because a 637 00:28:55,840 --> 00:28:57,920 Speaker 4: lot of people who are already in the space, they're 638 00:28:57,960 --> 00:29:00,720 Speaker 4: just getting tested regularly, like once a month or maybe 639 00:29:00,760 --> 00:29:03,760 Speaker 4: after they had a wild night they multiple Yeah, so 640 00:29:04,080 --> 00:29:06,200 Speaker 4: it's not for them, it's for like the newer people 641 00:29:06,240 --> 00:29:08,600 Speaker 4: who are like, oh, well, you know, me and my 642 00:29:09,520 --> 00:29:12,680 Speaker 4: partner have only played with each other. Oh that's my favorite. 643 00:29:13,040 --> 00:29:17,160 Speaker 4: That's my favorite, because come on, so what what ends 644 00:29:17,200 --> 00:29:19,600 Speaker 4: up happening? You know, like one in ten you know, 645 00:29:20,000 --> 00:29:22,360 Speaker 4: I don't let me not say that. Ever, so often 646 00:29:22,760 --> 00:29:24,720 Speaker 4: a couple will go couple like, oh, we only play 647 00:29:24,720 --> 00:29:27,920 Speaker 4: with each other, and then they end up getting their 648 00:29:28,000 --> 00:29:30,560 Speaker 4: tests and then one person has something and now y'all 649 00:29:30,600 --> 00:29:33,880 Speaker 4: got to have that conversation. But this is part of 650 00:29:34,040 --> 00:29:37,480 Speaker 4: the culture, right, like you should be you should be 651 00:29:37,520 --> 00:29:40,400 Speaker 4: able to have that conversation. And if you haven't been 652 00:29:40,480 --> 00:29:42,280 Speaker 4: honest with each other about who you've been playing, well, 653 00:29:42,320 --> 00:29:44,520 Speaker 4: well now it's time to have that conversation. 654 00:29:44,120 --> 00:29:45,760 Speaker 3: Too, hopefully so ethical. 655 00:29:46,120 --> 00:29:48,800 Speaker 4: This is part of you coming into the community to 656 00:29:48,880 --> 00:29:51,640 Speaker 4: make sure are you both coming in honestly? Are you 657 00:29:51,800 --> 00:29:55,479 Speaker 4: both you know, destigmatizing STI testing, Like you don't need 658 00:29:55,720 --> 00:29:58,960 Speaker 4: just because you don't have to go get STI tests 659 00:29:59,000 --> 00:30:00,720 Speaker 4: just because you feel like you have something right. You 660 00:30:00,720 --> 00:30:02,520 Speaker 4: could have just had a crazy night, you know what, 661 00:30:02,800 --> 00:30:05,720 Speaker 4: Let's go double check. So it's more about bringing people 662 00:30:05,760 --> 00:30:08,560 Speaker 4: into the culture than making sure there's no STIs in 663 00:30:08,800 --> 00:30:09,760 Speaker 4: in the in the party. 664 00:30:09,800 --> 00:30:12,560 Speaker 3: Because I definitely realized. Me know, LETTO have been together 665 00:30:12,680 --> 00:30:15,960 Speaker 3: fucking five years. I'm like, we've never gotten tested together. 666 00:30:16,040 --> 00:30:17,719 Speaker 3: It was the first time you've ever done such a thing. 667 00:30:17,760 --> 00:30:19,240 Speaker 3: As it feels good. 668 00:30:19,560 --> 00:30:21,120 Speaker 1: Obviously we knew, but like it was. 669 00:30:21,280 --> 00:30:24,160 Speaker 3: Also a nice, a nice thing to do together. As 670 00:30:24,240 --> 00:30:25,880 Speaker 3: like now we're an ethical cover. 671 00:30:26,320 --> 00:30:31,160 Speaker 2: So because you know STIs, there's a lot of shame 672 00:30:31,240 --> 00:30:33,720 Speaker 2: around st I s s TDS are two different things. 673 00:30:33,680 --> 00:30:36,240 Speaker 4: Right, yeah, we do we say STIs. 674 00:30:36,280 --> 00:30:42,000 Speaker 2: Now, okay, how does that work? If someone does have 675 00:30:42,080 --> 00:30:44,640 Speaker 2: an STI? Are they allowed entry? And if so, what 676 00:30:44,840 --> 00:30:47,480 Speaker 2: is that process? Are you like having a conversation with 677 00:30:47,520 --> 00:30:51,120 Speaker 2: them before are you like looking out like watching them, 678 00:30:51,240 --> 00:30:51,800 Speaker 2: like how does that? 679 00:30:52,440 --> 00:30:54,239 Speaker 3: Hey, did you talk to her? 680 00:30:55,160 --> 00:30:57,080 Speaker 4: We know you have got you need a chill. 681 00:30:58,040 --> 00:31:01,400 Speaker 1: Stop with that. Perhaps not like maybe maybe an STI 682 00:31:01,560 --> 00:31:03,080 Speaker 1: that is not curable exactly. 683 00:31:03,120 --> 00:31:05,320 Speaker 4: Let's talk about Let's just talk about HSV one and 684 00:31:05,520 --> 00:31:09,680 Speaker 4: hs V two, okay, right, because that's what everybody wants 685 00:31:09,720 --> 00:31:12,920 Speaker 4: to talk about, right, and that is the one we 686 00:31:13,040 --> 00:31:13,840 Speaker 4: do not check for. 687 00:31:14,320 --> 00:31:16,360 Speaker 3: And you know what, this isn't important because April is 688 00:31:16,960 --> 00:31:19,440 Speaker 3: STI Awareness month, you guys. And that's why I was 689 00:31:19,440 --> 00:31:21,400 Speaker 3: actually happy to go get tested this month with my 690 00:31:21,520 --> 00:31:25,240 Speaker 3: partner because it just makes even more a topic of conversation. 691 00:31:25,680 --> 00:31:27,880 Speaker 3: But I read that on your site that the eight 692 00:31:28,280 --> 00:31:31,959 Speaker 3: for what is it for herpes? Essentially HSV one two 693 00:31:32,120 --> 00:31:34,000 Speaker 3: check for because a lot of times people are it's 694 00:31:34,120 --> 00:31:36,040 Speaker 3: in your blood stream and you don't even know it. 695 00:31:36,240 --> 00:31:37,880 Speaker 4: Oh, first off, eighty percent of y'all have it. 696 00:31:37,960 --> 00:31:44,520 Speaker 3: Yeah, eighths. One in five women have herpes genital gin 697 00:31:44,600 --> 00:31:45,400 Speaker 3: let's HSV two. 698 00:31:46,080 --> 00:31:47,240 Speaker 4: When it comes HSV one. 699 00:31:47,640 --> 00:31:50,800 Speaker 1: It's like cold storing your mouth, yes, no one is. 700 00:31:51,080 --> 00:31:53,960 Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, so the majority of people have it. And 701 00:31:54,480 --> 00:31:57,160 Speaker 4: there was a time where we were asking for those results, 702 00:31:57,200 --> 00:32:01,600 Speaker 4: but we followed HF and HF has just been doing 703 00:32:01,720 --> 00:32:04,960 Speaker 4: amazing work. We usually send people their way. It's free 704 00:32:05,320 --> 00:32:07,320 Speaker 4: as well. We just found mental health clinics, so we're 705 00:32:07,360 --> 00:32:12,160 Speaker 4: sending people there now too. But because so many people 706 00:32:12,280 --> 00:32:15,640 Speaker 4: were having HSV one and HSV two. You know, they're 707 00:32:15,680 --> 00:32:18,440 Speaker 4: having these conversations every day with people, and people feel 708 00:32:18,520 --> 00:32:21,720 Speaker 4: like their life is over. So they stopped requiring a 709 00:32:21,760 --> 00:32:24,520 Speaker 4: part of their standard test. They stopped requiring HSV one 710 00:32:24,680 --> 00:32:27,520 Speaker 4: HSV two, you know, and there's not a lot of 711 00:32:27,640 --> 00:32:29,640 Speaker 4: test a testing because. 712 00:32:29,400 --> 00:32:31,640 Speaker 3: Because if you're having an active breakout, you can look 713 00:32:31,680 --> 00:32:33,520 Speaker 3: at it and see, but if you're not, you're getting 714 00:32:33,600 --> 00:32:36,560 Speaker 3: tested via your blood and a lot of times HSV 715 00:32:37,320 --> 00:32:39,600 Speaker 3: one and two lays dormant in your blood. And some 716 00:32:39,640 --> 00:32:42,080 Speaker 3: people may not ever have an outbreak, maybe you have 717 00:32:42,160 --> 00:32:44,800 Speaker 3: it very rarely in your lifetime. But what was happening 718 00:32:44,920 --> 00:32:48,400 Speaker 3: is you're getting tested and you're getting the blood results 719 00:32:48,480 --> 00:32:50,680 Speaker 3: and it could be lying dormant forever, and then people 720 00:32:50,720 --> 00:32:52,920 Speaker 3: are having such deep panic attacks. 721 00:32:52,600 --> 00:32:55,640 Speaker 4: And now it's breaking out and you're triggering. 722 00:32:55,280 --> 00:32:57,520 Speaker 3: It because now you're having this information that you may 723 00:32:57,600 --> 00:33:00,360 Speaker 3: not have ever even known otherwise unless you were having 724 00:33:00,360 --> 00:33:01,240 Speaker 3: an active breakout. 725 00:33:01,720 --> 00:33:04,640 Speaker 4: Yeah. So they that's who we took the lead from. 726 00:33:04,680 --> 00:33:06,640 Speaker 4: It's like, okay, well if the clinics are not testing 727 00:33:06,720 --> 00:33:08,640 Speaker 4: for it anymore, then we don't need to be having 728 00:33:08,800 --> 00:33:11,800 Speaker 4: testing for it either. Because we were finding the same thing. 729 00:33:11,840 --> 00:33:13,240 Speaker 4: It was like, hey, I just got tested, now have HC. 730 00:33:13,440 --> 00:33:18,880 Speaker 4: And it was like yo, it's fine, Yeah exactly, there 731 00:33:18,960 --> 00:33:19,360 Speaker 4: was a time. 732 00:33:20,000 --> 00:33:22,959 Speaker 1: But how much does it cost to get an S Freekay? 733 00:33:23,240 --> 00:33:23,480 Speaker 3: Nice? 734 00:33:23,560 --> 00:33:28,120 Speaker 4: I love that free. There's so many places in America everybody. 735 00:33:27,800 --> 00:33:30,280 Speaker 3: Especially in California, we're very liberal on that space. Like 736 00:33:30,320 --> 00:33:32,000 Speaker 3: if you don't have insurance, they're not asking you sh 737 00:33:32,160 --> 00:33:34,560 Speaker 3: you get all your results immediately, nothing, no cost. 738 00:33:34,720 --> 00:33:38,400 Speaker 4: So and it gets back to you know, this is 739 00:33:38,440 --> 00:33:40,000 Speaker 4: why we're asking, Like I'm asking you to go do 740 00:33:40,120 --> 00:33:43,120 Speaker 4: something that costs nothing. This is just information for yourself. 741 00:33:43,160 --> 00:33:46,880 Speaker 4: So do you want to be ethical in this? Ethical nominogamy? 742 00:33:47,080 --> 00:33:51,560 Speaker 4: And so once once you know, those are the two 743 00:33:51,720 --> 00:33:54,360 Speaker 4: kind of pillars, like we are pillars for the party, 744 00:33:54,440 --> 00:34:00,720 Speaker 4: our care, consent, connection, creativity, and community. That's what we 745 00:34:00,760 --> 00:34:04,600 Speaker 4: build this experience around. So you got the care. We 746 00:34:04,760 --> 00:34:07,560 Speaker 4: always do a consent speech during the party as well, 747 00:34:07,920 --> 00:34:11,120 Speaker 4: super important. Some parties do it. You know a lot 748 00:34:11,160 --> 00:34:12,879 Speaker 4: of parties where you purchase a ticket to they don't 749 00:34:12,920 --> 00:34:14,959 Speaker 4: do it. They won't stop everything to have the consent 750 00:34:15,160 --> 00:34:18,879 Speaker 4: that they'll maybe do an orientation you know, like oh hey, 751 00:34:19,360 --> 00:34:21,360 Speaker 4: like is this your first one? Like Okay, we'll do 752 00:34:21,440 --> 00:34:23,560 Speaker 4: it for me. It feels like just when you get 753 00:34:23,600 --> 00:34:26,920 Speaker 4: on a plane, Like I know the safety speech when 754 00:34:26,960 --> 00:34:29,399 Speaker 4: I get on the plane, but you know what, I'm 755 00:34:29,400 --> 00:34:32,040 Speaker 4: gonna still sit through it because I'm on the plane, 756 00:34:32,440 --> 00:34:35,600 Speaker 4: and just before I do anything where health is at risk, 757 00:34:35,719 --> 00:34:37,680 Speaker 4: I'm okay hearing a safety speech. I don't need to 758 00:34:37,760 --> 00:34:41,320 Speaker 4: roll my eyes because another consent speech before we like 759 00:34:41,560 --> 00:34:46,600 Speaker 4: actually do this well exactly. You know, some consent is big. 760 00:34:46,680 --> 00:34:48,680 Speaker 4: We have a saying if it's not a fuck yes, 761 00:34:48,800 --> 00:34:51,080 Speaker 4: it's a no, not a fuck no. I want to 762 00:34:51,120 --> 00:34:52,359 Speaker 4: make sure because a lot of people are like it's 763 00:34:52,400 --> 00:34:53,800 Speaker 4: a fuck no, it's just like no, if it's not 764 00:34:53,880 --> 00:34:56,360 Speaker 4: a yes, sometimes it's a not right now now. Not 765 00:34:56,520 --> 00:34:58,719 Speaker 4: right now is a no, but it's also not right now. 766 00:34:59,320 --> 00:35:02,120 Speaker 4: You know. We tell people you can ask somebody two 767 00:35:02,200 --> 00:35:05,000 Speaker 4: times if you want to play, if they want to play, right. 768 00:35:05,120 --> 00:35:08,200 Speaker 4: So I'm like, hey, or could you know you want 769 00:35:08,200 --> 00:35:10,319 Speaker 4: to play tonight? And you're like I just got here, 770 00:35:10,800 --> 00:35:12,839 Speaker 4: you know, like I'm still feeling this space out right, 771 00:35:12,960 --> 00:35:15,600 Speaker 4: And then later on we've been there for four hours, 772 00:35:15,800 --> 00:35:18,640 Speaker 4: you know, and then I'm like, hey, is it cool? 773 00:35:18,640 --> 00:35:19,880 Speaker 4: And you're like, you know what I'm dropped into this 774 00:35:19,880 --> 00:35:21,520 Speaker 4: space a little more. You know what I am, you know. 775 00:35:21,840 --> 00:35:24,000 Speaker 4: But when I do get to know, what we do 776 00:35:24,160 --> 00:35:27,800 Speaker 4: is teach people about how to receive the know. And 777 00:35:27,920 --> 00:35:29,759 Speaker 4: that's the big thing that we're trying to do in 778 00:35:29,800 --> 00:35:32,839 Speaker 4: the play when we talk about shifting the culture right, 779 00:35:33,120 --> 00:35:35,239 Speaker 4: not just with testing, not just on how we bring 780 00:35:35,320 --> 00:35:37,600 Speaker 4: people into the community, but we have to give them 781 00:35:37,680 --> 00:35:40,240 Speaker 4: the language and the tools to be successful in the community. 782 00:35:40,600 --> 00:35:42,960 Speaker 4: And part of that is like when you get a know, 783 00:35:44,080 --> 00:35:47,000 Speaker 4: what you how you say, how you receive that no 784 00:35:47,560 --> 00:35:50,000 Speaker 4: really defines how that interaction is going to be. Right. 785 00:35:50,440 --> 00:35:53,279 Speaker 4: So when you get to know, we say thank you 786 00:35:53,480 --> 00:35:55,200 Speaker 4: for taking care of yourself. 787 00:35:55,640 --> 00:35:57,280 Speaker 1: Thank you for being a friend. 788 00:36:00,000 --> 00:36:04,160 Speaker 4: I don't know some people be like yourself, but that's 789 00:36:05,160 --> 00:36:06,920 Speaker 4: because usually when you when you do that, thank you 790 00:36:07,000 --> 00:36:09,440 Speaker 4: for taking care of yourself, like it's a reminder to yourself. 791 00:36:09,760 --> 00:36:11,719 Speaker 4: Like it's like because they're not saying no to you, 792 00:36:12,239 --> 00:36:14,759 Speaker 4: they're saying yes to their boundaries. So like, thank you 793 00:36:14,840 --> 00:36:17,080 Speaker 4: for saying yes to your boundaries. I move along, And 794 00:36:17,160 --> 00:36:19,600 Speaker 4: a lot of times because you were so gracious in 795 00:36:19,719 --> 00:36:22,560 Speaker 4: that no, you kind of you may have another chance 796 00:36:22,800 --> 00:36:24,960 Speaker 4: versus like you say no, like okay, next. 797 00:36:25,000 --> 00:36:28,400 Speaker 3: You know, like just you know, I also find that 798 00:36:28,640 --> 00:36:31,279 Speaker 3: especially for women, and I realized that just you know, 799 00:36:31,480 --> 00:36:37,800 Speaker 3: my my lifestyle adjacent lifestyle, that practicing saying no is 800 00:36:37,880 --> 00:36:41,040 Speaker 3: something that women really are not empowered to do. I mean, 801 00:36:41,080 --> 00:36:43,000 Speaker 3: I'm sure men either, and there's a lot of us 802 00:36:43,040 --> 00:36:46,000 Speaker 3: who are like in people pleasing culture and so practicing 803 00:36:46,120 --> 00:36:48,800 Speaker 3: saying no feeling empowered and saying no knowing that the 804 00:36:48,880 --> 00:36:51,400 Speaker 3: other person is expecting some knows and that you're going 805 00:36:51,480 --> 00:36:53,920 Speaker 3: to be embraced regardless, is like as something that we 806 00:36:54,000 --> 00:36:56,400 Speaker 3: have to embrace as a society because I feel like 807 00:36:56,480 --> 00:36:59,279 Speaker 3: even like being like a TONTRA practitioner is like we're 808 00:36:59,400 --> 00:37:02,080 Speaker 3: not really well versed and we're like the yeses and 809 00:37:02,200 --> 00:37:04,399 Speaker 3: no's live in our bodies. So a lot of times 810 00:37:04,440 --> 00:37:06,359 Speaker 3: we're going against our gut feeling. We're going against things 811 00:37:06,400 --> 00:37:07,600 Speaker 3: that we want to do because we're trying to please 812 00:37:07,640 --> 00:37:09,040 Speaker 3: everyone else. I don't want to make them feel bad. 813 00:37:09,200 --> 00:37:10,400 Speaker 3: A lot of women I know, me and Eric I 814 00:37:10,440 --> 00:37:13,000 Speaker 3: say this to each other about seventy seven times a month. 815 00:37:13,200 --> 00:37:14,560 Speaker 3: Oh my god, I'm such a bitch. Am I big 816 00:37:14,600 --> 00:37:16,560 Speaker 3: a bitch? Am I feel like a bitch? I feel 817 00:37:16,600 --> 00:37:18,480 Speaker 3: such a bitch. This is like we say this seventeen 818 00:37:18,520 --> 00:37:22,279 Speaker 3: times a week, but it's like whatever, who cares with 819 00:37:22,560 --> 00:37:25,040 Speaker 3: how it's going to be received. Feel comfortable with your 820 00:37:25,080 --> 00:37:27,359 Speaker 3: own no, so that you know when you're doing something 821 00:37:27,400 --> 00:37:29,560 Speaker 3: that's going against your body, you're going against what you 822 00:37:29,680 --> 00:37:31,600 Speaker 3: actually want to do. So I just I feel like 823 00:37:32,360 --> 00:37:34,320 Speaker 3: a lot of people shy away from these types of 824 00:37:34,400 --> 00:37:37,160 Speaker 3: spaces because it seems so large and oh, it's so 825 00:37:37,280 --> 00:37:40,640 Speaker 3: many freaks in someone's that's not me. That's a little crazy, 826 00:37:40,680 --> 00:37:43,000 Speaker 3: that's so extreme for me. And the truth is it's 827 00:37:43,040 --> 00:37:45,640 Speaker 3: like it's a party, and yes, people are fucking, but 828 00:37:45,760 --> 00:37:48,279 Speaker 3: I always find that it's just a space to like 829 00:37:48,560 --> 00:37:51,279 Speaker 3: feel free and liberated, whether or not you're playing or not, 830 00:37:51,440 --> 00:37:56,040 Speaker 3: whether you're participating, it's such a space to exercise freedom. 831 00:37:56,440 --> 00:37:59,120 Speaker 3: And that's freedom to express in whatever way, to dance, 832 00:37:59,280 --> 00:38:02,759 Speaker 3: to play, to like sexually and just just say no, 833 00:38:03,080 --> 00:38:05,600 Speaker 3: I'm good and to do it a smile and get 834 00:38:05,719 --> 00:38:07,400 Speaker 3: practice in that, because I feel like a lot of 835 00:38:07,440 --> 00:38:10,200 Speaker 3: women do not have practice saying no. And this is 836 00:38:10,280 --> 00:38:14,080 Speaker 3: also like sexual assault and Prevention Awareness month, and a 837 00:38:14,200 --> 00:38:17,600 Speaker 3: lot of women get assaulted because we are not empowered 838 00:38:17,640 --> 00:38:20,719 Speaker 3: to say no, I'm my twenties and my teenage years. 839 00:38:20,800 --> 00:38:22,640 Speaker 3: I just laid down and took a lot of shit 840 00:38:22,800 --> 00:38:26,640 Speaker 3: just because I was not empowered on being like I'm good. Hey, hey, 841 00:38:26,719 --> 00:38:28,600 Speaker 3: I just told you no, I'm not comfortable. 842 00:38:28,840 --> 00:38:29,440 Speaker 1: It's so funny. 843 00:38:29,480 --> 00:38:33,200 Speaker 2: I was talking to shakem about our interview with Lisa 844 00:38:34,480 --> 00:38:39,880 Speaker 2: Phillips about, you know, just sexual assault, and he was 845 00:38:39,960 --> 00:38:41,879 Speaker 2: asking me, He's like, how many times do you think 846 00:38:41,920 --> 00:38:44,440 Speaker 2: that you've been in the act of sex and then 847 00:38:44,920 --> 00:38:45,759 Speaker 2: got up and said no? 848 00:38:46,640 --> 00:38:49,480 Speaker 3: And the fact that you even like you you even 849 00:38:49,560 --> 00:38:51,880 Speaker 3: saying this question right now is brought up like a 850 00:38:52,000 --> 00:38:53,439 Speaker 3: daunting feeling in my chest. 851 00:38:54,719 --> 00:38:59,920 Speaker 1: And I said, never, I've never laid down with the. 852 00:39:00,080 --> 00:39:02,359 Speaker 3: Man and then change your mind. 853 00:39:02,560 --> 00:39:06,120 Speaker 1: I have changed my mind, but I ever said never mind, 854 00:39:06,160 --> 00:39:06,680 Speaker 1: get off of me. 855 00:39:06,920 --> 00:39:09,279 Speaker 3: I could probably think of in like maybe three or 856 00:39:09,440 --> 00:39:11,560 Speaker 3: three or five times on one hand, the amount of 857 00:39:11,560 --> 00:39:14,400 Speaker 3: times that I laid there and wanted to leave but 858 00:39:14,560 --> 00:39:18,440 Speaker 3: shut down instead. I can't even Instead of learning that, 859 00:39:18,560 --> 00:39:22,320 Speaker 3: I just I eventually learned how to check out well that, 860 00:39:22,600 --> 00:39:24,000 Speaker 3: but more so like I. 861 00:39:24,040 --> 00:39:26,400 Speaker 2: Don't I don't even get to that point anymore. I 862 00:39:26,400 --> 00:39:29,200 Speaker 2: don't even allow someone to come into into that space. 863 00:39:29,840 --> 00:39:32,440 Speaker 2: But I never learned how to say no in that regard. 864 00:39:32,840 --> 00:39:36,320 Speaker 4: In that way, this brings me back to our second pillar, consent. 865 00:39:36,719 --> 00:39:39,680 Speaker 4: When we do our consent talk, we bring up this 866 00:39:39,960 --> 00:39:45,279 Speaker 4: exact moment, is that at any moment, you can take 867 00:39:45,400 --> 00:39:48,520 Speaker 4: your consent back. You can change your mind. You could 868 00:39:48,600 --> 00:39:50,479 Speaker 4: be a guy could be putting the condom on woman 869 00:39:50,560 --> 00:39:52,360 Speaker 4: be like you know what, not right now, or a 870 00:39:52,480 --> 00:39:54,360 Speaker 4: guy could be inside. There's other times where you know, 871 00:39:54,440 --> 00:39:56,240 Speaker 4: for men where they feel like, man, I gotta finish. 872 00:39:56,440 --> 00:39:58,040 Speaker 4: You know, it's like, hey, it's a lot if you are, 873 00:39:58,239 --> 00:40:02,520 Speaker 4: if you're done, just and it's part of this is 874 00:40:02,560 --> 00:40:03,239 Speaker 4: why you. 875 00:40:03,320 --> 00:40:06,440 Speaker 2: Mean, like a man also feels like he's complete, but 876 00:40:06,560 --> 00:40:08,960 Speaker 2: he hasn't completed, and so he keeps going even though 877 00:40:09,000 --> 00:40:10,520 Speaker 2: he's he feels complete. 878 00:40:11,800 --> 00:40:13,520 Speaker 4: Yeah, there's like I mean, there's both, there's both sides. 879 00:40:13,560 --> 00:40:17,040 Speaker 4: But the girl was over here, yeah, like yo, it's like, hey, 880 00:40:17,160 --> 00:40:19,640 Speaker 4: I right now, I am done. Right whether it was 881 00:40:19,760 --> 00:40:21,279 Speaker 4: like you came or not, it's just like I am 882 00:40:21,520 --> 00:40:25,640 Speaker 4: now done with it this situation, right and so, but 883 00:40:26,160 --> 00:40:29,240 Speaker 4: that's part of this culture that we're trying to create. 884 00:40:29,680 --> 00:40:32,440 Speaker 4: Reminding you during the consent talk, remember you can take 885 00:40:32,480 --> 00:40:36,680 Speaker 4: back consent right, so, and consent isn't how we get 886 00:40:36,880 --> 00:40:39,080 Speaker 4: what we want, it's how we take care of each other, 887 00:40:39,760 --> 00:40:44,640 Speaker 4: you know. So then it gets to connection. So we 888 00:40:44,800 --> 00:40:47,440 Speaker 4: do the intimacy exercise, and this is what I love 889 00:40:47,480 --> 00:40:51,200 Speaker 4: and this is kind of again what separates us from 890 00:40:51,239 --> 00:40:53,560 Speaker 4: other spaces right where it's doesn't just feel like this 891 00:40:53,680 --> 00:41:01,279 Speaker 4: college party. Appreciate it with the consent talk, with the 892 00:41:01,320 --> 00:41:04,279 Speaker 4: I'm sorry, but the intimacy exercise we tell everybody to 893 00:41:05,239 --> 00:41:10,000 Speaker 4: we do this in silence number one, and it's basically 894 00:41:10,520 --> 00:41:14,400 Speaker 4: I gazing with three or four strangers or four strangers, right, 895 00:41:14,680 --> 00:41:16,160 Speaker 4: and it's a thirty second I gaze. It's not the 896 00:41:16,200 --> 00:41:17,799 Speaker 4: two minute, you know, I see myself when I'm crying. 897 00:41:17,840 --> 00:41:20,879 Speaker 2: Listen, thirty seconds is really hard for people, very ten 898 00:41:21,000 --> 00:41:23,120 Speaker 2: seconds a second exactly. 899 00:41:23,280 --> 00:41:29,240 Speaker 4: So the other thing is we do this in silence. 900 00:41:30,280 --> 00:41:31,759 Speaker 4: And the reason we do it in silence because we 901 00:41:31,840 --> 00:41:35,320 Speaker 4: have to create opportunity for verbal and non verbal connection. 902 00:41:35,800 --> 00:41:38,080 Speaker 4: A lot of times these party people, you know, parties people, 903 00:41:38,440 --> 00:41:41,080 Speaker 4: whether they're I've seen the most confident guys type A 904 00:41:41,200 --> 00:41:44,640 Speaker 4: personalities like now that's sex is the topic. What's your game? 905 00:41:45,120 --> 00:41:45,359 Speaker 3: None? 906 00:41:45,760 --> 00:41:49,919 Speaker 4: You feel me? So allowing people to not have game 907 00:41:50,160 --> 00:41:53,839 Speaker 4: right and just be drop in, be yourself. You don't. 908 00:41:53,880 --> 00:41:55,640 Speaker 4: We tell people we don't need to smile, you don't 909 00:41:55,680 --> 00:41:57,279 Speaker 4: need a wink, you don't need to touch them. You 910 00:41:57,480 --> 00:42:00,799 Speaker 4: just drop in, be present with somebody because we at 911 00:42:00,880 --> 00:42:03,760 Speaker 4: our core, we all came to this space to connect. 912 00:42:04,200 --> 00:42:05,960 Speaker 4: And this is what I I you know, my friends 913 00:42:06,000 --> 00:42:08,960 Speaker 4: who refuse to go to play parties, you know, this 914 00:42:09,120 --> 00:42:11,560 Speaker 4: is what I'm trying to get them to see. Is like, Yo, 915 00:42:11,719 --> 00:42:14,480 Speaker 4: this isn't about having sex. It's just when was the 916 00:42:14,560 --> 00:42:18,839 Speaker 4: last time you guys were connecting deeply intimately you saw 917 00:42:18,880 --> 00:42:22,600 Speaker 4: another human just naked, you know, just being free, and 918 00:42:22,719 --> 00:42:25,560 Speaker 4: like it was fine, but they're not coming for you, 919 00:42:27,080 --> 00:42:29,400 Speaker 4: and it's just like that's just out there and that's okay, 920 00:42:29,960 --> 00:42:31,800 Speaker 4: you know. And you could also drop your guard to 921 00:42:31,840 --> 00:42:34,800 Speaker 4: be vulnerable. So this is how we create these spaces 922 00:42:34,840 --> 00:42:38,480 Speaker 4: of vulnerability. And so that's really what play parties at 923 00:42:38,719 --> 00:42:40,680 Speaker 4: their core are, is that here's another space where you 924 00:42:40,719 --> 00:42:42,480 Speaker 4: can be a little bit more vulnerable. 925 00:42:42,800 --> 00:42:46,040 Speaker 2: Would you say that that's the that's the difference between 926 00:42:46,239 --> 00:42:48,080 Speaker 2: your play party and other play parties or is that 927 00:42:48,160 --> 00:42:50,520 Speaker 2: the difference between a sex party and a play party? 928 00:42:51,600 --> 00:42:54,400 Speaker 4: I think ours were trying to build a little bit 929 00:42:54,440 --> 00:42:58,080 Speaker 4: more vulnerability, Like not every party. I don't think any 930 00:42:58,120 --> 00:43:01,400 Speaker 4: other party has like the intimacy actual size, right, So 931 00:43:02,160 --> 00:43:04,919 Speaker 4: that's something that's specific to us. We also do during 932 00:43:04,960 --> 00:43:09,320 Speaker 4: that intimacy exercise, we do I'm the last person that 933 00:43:09,440 --> 00:43:15,400 Speaker 4: you I gaze with. We exchange our DIBs, our desires, intentions, boundaries, 934 00:43:15,520 --> 00:43:19,759 Speaker 4: and sexuality. So this is again part of us trying 935 00:43:19,760 --> 00:43:23,440 Speaker 4: to shift the culture where it's like, first off, let's 936 00:43:23,480 --> 00:43:27,000 Speaker 4: hear that desire, the sexual sensual one, you know, like 937 00:43:27,280 --> 00:43:31,319 Speaker 4: say what you want to experience sexually? Because that's part 938 00:43:31,320 --> 00:43:33,440 Speaker 4: of the reason you're here is for that, and being 939 00:43:33,480 --> 00:43:36,839 Speaker 4: able to express your desires is just as important as 940 00:43:36,920 --> 00:43:41,920 Speaker 4: being able to express your boundaries. Right. So then intentions, Okay, 941 00:43:42,040 --> 00:43:45,120 Speaker 4: so that was the physical. Why are you here? Is 942 00:43:45,160 --> 00:43:51,040 Speaker 4: it for community? Is it for connection? Is it for exploration? Liberation? 943 00:43:52,440 --> 00:43:55,439 Speaker 4: You know? Why are you really here? And then the last, 944 00:43:55,600 --> 00:44:00,520 Speaker 4: I mean the third to last is boundaries. Let's say 945 00:44:00,719 --> 00:44:02,919 Speaker 4: we tell people the topic of conversation when they first arrive, 946 00:44:03,000 --> 00:44:06,279 Speaker 4: are your boundaries? Just like, just start with that, right, 947 00:44:06,320 --> 00:44:09,080 Speaker 4: because there's been so many situations can I because I 948 00:44:09,120 --> 00:44:11,919 Speaker 4: don't think you know, as a cis male, I don't 949 00:44:12,040 --> 00:44:16,719 Speaker 4: think that men are trying to cross boundaries. Sometimes I 950 00:44:16,800 --> 00:44:19,400 Speaker 4: think there's just they're not communicating to say hey, or 951 00:44:19,400 --> 00:44:21,719 Speaker 4: do you have any boundaries? First? Right, you just touch 952 00:44:21,880 --> 00:44:24,759 Speaker 4: that person's shoulder, you know, the trauma around the shoulder. Right, 953 00:44:24,960 --> 00:44:27,960 Speaker 4: So just like, let's just start by typing the boundaries 954 00:44:28,000 --> 00:44:30,399 Speaker 4: conversation and then we can work from there. So let's 955 00:44:30,400 --> 00:44:32,719 Speaker 4: say during the first two hours of the party, you 956 00:44:32,760 --> 00:44:36,360 Speaker 4: didn't have that conversation. No matter what, the intimacy exercise happens, 957 00:44:36,400 --> 00:44:38,680 Speaker 4: like after we close the doors two hours, you know, 958 00:44:38,719 --> 00:44:41,719 Speaker 4: after we close the door, so everybody's there. So no 959 00:44:41,840 --> 00:44:44,520 Speaker 4: matter what, everybody in the space will say their boundary 960 00:44:45,239 --> 00:44:48,279 Speaker 4: to one other person. And it doesn't matter if that 961 00:44:48,360 --> 00:44:51,080 Speaker 4: person is like what you're attracted to or not. It's 962 00:44:51,160 --> 00:44:55,560 Speaker 4: about you know, speaking aloud, speaking into existence your boundaries, 963 00:44:55,640 --> 00:44:57,520 Speaker 4: making sure that you're saying them out out, grounding you 964 00:44:57,600 --> 00:45:02,960 Speaker 4: into the experience. And then last it's sexuality. And I 965 00:45:03,080 --> 00:45:07,239 Speaker 4: love this one. One of my mentors, William Winters. He's 966 00:45:07,320 --> 00:45:11,640 Speaker 4: actually a black man who has a huge play party 967 00:45:12,840 --> 00:45:16,960 Speaker 4: community in San Francisco. He's like ten years older than me, 968 00:45:17,280 --> 00:45:20,920 Speaker 4: and I found him. I was like, wait, what you exist? 969 00:45:23,200 --> 00:45:25,880 Speaker 4: I started, I started to tear it up very godfather 970 00:45:27,520 --> 00:45:29,919 Speaker 4: and like, you know, but he you know, he lives 971 00:45:29,920 --> 00:45:32,279 Speaker 4: in San Francisco, and you know, so as far as 972 00:45:32,320 --> 00:45:34,759 Speaker 4: like super liberal and they're like thinking of I mean, 973 00:45:34,800 --> 00:45:37,760 Speaker 4: they're the four frank the thought leaders in this space, 974 00:45:38,239 --> 00:45:42,120 Speaker 4: you know. And he was like, you should add sexuality 975 00:45:42,760 --> 00:45:45,040 Speaker 4: because when you when you add the sexuality to it, 976 00:45:45,560 --> 00:45:49,800 Speaker 4: it forces everyone to say what their sexuality is. And 977 00:45:51,640 --> 00:45:53,680 Speaker 4: you know, as a as a male, who I find 978 00:45:53,719 --> 00:45:58,080 Speaker 4: myself on the scale, you know, and the Kinsey scale. Exactly, 979 00:45:58,239 --> 00:46:02,240 Speaker 4: thank you, because I don't think I'm one hundred percent anything, 980 00:46:02,800 --> 00:46:06,120 Speaker 4: you know. And so I may on a dating app 981 00:46:06,360 --> 00:46:10,880 Speaker 4: check a box, you know, hetero flexible box there, you know, 982 00:46:11,400 --> 00:46:14,200 Speaker 4: I'm you know, maybe type it out and yeah, exactly 983 00:46:14,320 --> 00:46:17,680 Speaker 4: type it out onto my tender profile, or you don't really. 984 00:46:17,560 --> 00:46:18,040 Speaker 1: Say it out loud. 985 00:46:18,080 --> 00:46:18,600 Speaker 4: I don't say it. 986 00:46:18,920 --> 00:46:22,080 Speaker 2: I mean we like the power of the frequency of 987 00:46:22,239 --> 00:46:25,640 Speaker 2: voice and releasing out of your body and owning and 988 00:46:25,880 --> 00:46:29,040 Speaker 2: believing is so powerful. I mean, that's that's that's been 989 00:46:29,200 --> 00:46:31,600 Speaker 2: the superpower in this space. But I think too about 990 00:46:32,200 --> 00:46:33,600 Speaker 2: saying it out loud is like. 991 00:46:34,360 --> 00:46:35,640 Speaker 1: That's what everyone's so afraid of. 992 00:46:36,080 --> 00:46:39,320 Speaker 2: People are so afraid to have any sort of label 993 00:46:39,440 --> 00:46:42,440 Speaker 2: on them, like if you like girls and you primarily 994 00:46:42,520 --> 00:46:44,880 Speaker 2: fuck with girls, and you really and you really, like 995 00:46:45,080 --> 00:46:48,359 Speaker 2: you've never said I'm a lesbian or even bisexual. 996 00:46:48,680 --> 00:46:53,160 Speaker 1: Like hearing you say those things, it releases the binds 997 00:46:53,200 --> 00:46:54,080 Speaker 1: of that control. 998 00:46:54,560 --> 00:46:54,759 Speaker 4: You know. 999 00:46:54,920 --> 00:46:57,919 Speaker 2: I feel like it begins the conversation of like even 1000 00:46:58,000 --> 00:47:00,000 Speaker 2: if when you say it, you might not believe it 1001 00:47:00,560 --> 00:47:02,560 Speaker 2: because it might be your first time saying. 1002 00:47:02,680 --> 00:47:05,680 Speaker 4: It's awkward, coming out weird, You're like, what am I? 1003 00:47:06,400 --> 00:47:09,240 Speaker 2: But it begins that dialogue with your body and yourself 1004 00:47:09,360 --> 00:47:12,120 Speaker 2: around like okay, well yeah, let me let me what 1005 00:47:12,480 --> 00:47:13,200 Speaker 2: does this mean to me? 1006 00:47:13,640 --> 00:47:15,800 Speaker 4: You know, as someone who grew up in Los Angeles, 1007 00:47:16,719 --> 00:47:19,200 Speaker 4: pride has been happening since we were children, right right, 1008 00:47:19,680 --> 00:47:22,520 Speaker 4: And it was only until I got into this space 1009 00:47:22,680 --> 00:47:26,880 Speaker 4: and I've start saying to people I'm ahead, I'm a 1010 00:47:26,960 --> 00:47:30,600 Speaker 4: HEATERO flexible male. You know, did I really understand what 1011 00:47:30,760 --> 00:47:34,799 Speaker 4: pride meant? It's like that's when it he was like, oh, absolutely, 1012 00:47:34,880 --> 00:47:37,239 Speaker 4: Like that's what I'm taking pride in and and not 1013 00:47:37,360 --> 00:47:38,880 Speaker 4: that you know, I think being an ally is one 1014 00:47:38,960 --> 00:47:41,440 Speaker 4: thing and then kind of being owning. 1015 00:47:41,239 --> 00:47:44,840 Speaker 3: It as being especially as a black man exactly. You know, 1016 00:47:45,080 --> 00:47:47,040 Speaker 3: that there's so much stigma around it, and you know, 1017 00:47:47,160 --> 00:47:52,240 Speaker 3: even I've literally been in situations with my man another 1018 00:47:52,320 --> 00:47:55,760 Speaker 3: man in a sexual sense and then the person's questioning 1019 00:47:55,840 --> 00:47:58,680 Speaker 3: what's happening, and I'm telling like that there's it's it's 1020 00:47:58,800 --> 00:48:00,759 Speaker 3: you know what. It's powerful both ways, like, hey, this 1021 00:48:00,920 --> 00:48:03,440 Speaker 3: is what I am, and also like you make the 1022 00:48:03,520 --> 00:48:06,520 Speaker 3: rules of what you are like you like like you 1023 00:48:06,760 --> 00:48:09,480 Speaker 3: playing in a certain space or getting your dick suck 1024 00:48:09,680 --> 00:48:12,279 Speaker 3: with in one mouth two dicks like that is that 1025 00:48:12,560 --> 00:48:14,880 Speaker 3: some ship you watch on porn and you engage in it. 1026 00:48:14,960 --> 00:48:18,440 Speaker 3: I think people start start fucking spiraling, like I touched 1027 00:48:18,520 --> 00:48:21,200 Speaker 3: his thigh, you know what I mean, Like I'm gay, 1028 00:48:21,320 --> 00:48:22,560 Speaker 3: you know what it's like, And I'm like, you make 1029 00:48:22,640 --> 00:48:25,720 Speaker 3: the rule crazy and you're typing. 1030 00:48:27,200 --> 00:48:32,080 Speaker 2: I think that it's also like normalizing this idea that 1031 00:48:32,920 --> 00:48:36,839 Speaker 2: your your sexuality can change. You're allowed to be flexible 1032 00:48:36,880 --> 00:48:40,440 Speaker 2: in there. You might be monopoly, you might be straight today, 1033 00:48:40,520 --> 00:48:43,000 Speaker 2: you might be bisexual tomorrow. The Mila Fasher is a 1034 00:48:43,000 --> 00:48:45,560 Speaker 2: full lesbian for a while, you know, like, and you're 1035 00:48:45,640 --> 00:48:48,600 Speaker 2: giving yourself the permission to at least begin the exploration 1036 00:48:48,960 --> 00:48:51,680 Speaker 2: and and also knowing that maybe it's a lifelong journey of. 1037 00:48:51,880 --> 00:48:55,560 Speaker 1: Just sexuality is fluid. 1038 00:48:55,719 --> 00:48:57,800 Speaker 3: What I like yesterday, I might not, like, I'm not 1039 00:48:57,880 --> 00:49:00,319 Speaker 3: gonna like, I'm not going to be attracted to every person. 1040 00:49:00,480 --> 00:49:04,520 Speaker 3: Like there's literally errors for different shot and there's opportunities. 1041 00:49:03,920 --> 00:49:06,839 Speaker 4: For one time or also we're growing in all these 1042 00:49:06,880 --> 00:49:09,800 Speaker 4: other areas of our lives. Why wouldn't our sexuality also 1043 00:49:10,000 --> 00:49:12,680 Speaker 4: run Yeah, exactly expand like my understanding of it. So 1044 00:49:14,560 --> 00:49:17,719 Speaker 4: it's been powerful as far as does that mean I 1045 00:49:17,760 --> 00:49:18,520 Speaker 4: can be gay today? 1046 00:49:18,640 --> 00:49:21,120 Speaker 3: You can, I will stop calling you, I al stop 1047 00:49:21,160 --> 00:49:22,279 Speaker 3: calling you by fund, But I mean. 1048 00:49:22,200 --> 00:49:24,279 Speaker 2: Like, I'm gay today and then next week I might 1049 00:49:24,320 --> 00:49:25,880 Speaker 2: be buy fine? Or is that in disrespect to the 1050 00:49:26,200 --> 00:49:28,960 Speaker 2: to the people that are true to their status and 1051 00:49:29,000 --> 00:49:29,839 Speaker 2: their sexuality. 1052 00:49:29,960 --> 00:49:31,880 Speaker 3: It's queer and I think that's what query is. I 1053 00:49:31,920 --> 00:49:34,000 Speaker 3: just just just made me realize. I always like, what 1054 00:49:34,080 --> 00:49:35,239 Speaker 3: the fuck is the cue? I don't get it. I 1055 00:49:35,280 --> 00:49:37,600 Speaker 3: don't know what query is clear, But it's just like 1056 00:49:37,719 --> 00:49:41,640 Speaker 3: embodying that it's flexible. It's embodying that I'm not just this. 1057 00:49:41,880 --> 00:49:44,360 Speaker 3: There's masculine under there, you know, Like I am fluid. 1058 00:49:44,840 --> 00:49:47,960 Speaker 4: I've always found it interesting where people will be more 1059 00:49:48,000 --> 00:49:51,080 Speaker 4: of like, I'm not straight but they don't claim queerness. 1060 00:49:52,480 --> 00:49:54,560 Speaker 2: I think because people don't really understand what that word means. 1061 00:49:55,040 --> 00:49:57,759 Speaker 2: I mean, I think that there's a stigmatached to the word, 1062 00:49:57,800 --> 00:50:01,279 Speaker 2: for sure, but I think there's also, as Melagia shared, 1063 00:50:01,320 --> 00:50:04,399 Speaker 2: like confusion around exactly what what it means to be queer? 1064 00:50:04,760 --> 00:50:06,239 Speaker 2: Do you know, do you have a definition of what? 1065 00:50:06,480 --> 00:50:09,080 Speaker 2: What do you think it means to be queer? Is 1066 00:50:09,160 --> 00:50:11,040 Speaker 2: it just the fluidity of everything and everything? 1067 00:50:11,320 --> 00:50:14,040 Speaker 4: I think just like I think queer is not straight, 1068 00:50:14,560 --> 00:50:17,480 Speaker 4: you know, I think that, like what's its opposite? You know? 1069 00:50:17,680 --> 00:50:20,160 Speaker 4: And and then I've been again that can be so 1070 00:50:20,400 --> 00:50:24,000 Speaker 4: much and and cover so much, But yeah, I think, 1071 00:50:24,440 --> 00:50:27,000 Speaker 4: and then I get, you know, even deeper with it's 1072 00:50:27,040 --> 00:50:31,040 Speaker 4: like who is straight? Like what what's the what's the 1073 00:50:31,160 --> 00:50:31,879 Speaker 4: straightest thing? 1074 00:50:34,239 --> 00:50:36,680 Speaker 1: What is the actual pride? And be straight? Like why 1075 00:50:36,719 --> 00:50:38,200 Speaker 1: are people so proud to bet? 1076 00:50:39,920 --> 00:50:41,840 Speaker 3: Because it's it's normative. 1077 00:50:41,960 --> 00:50:43,200 Speaker 1: It means you haven't even begun. 1078 00:50:44,000 --> 00:50:46,120 Speaker 2: And it doesn't mean that if you say you're not straight, 1079 00:50:46,160 --> 00:50:48,799 Speaker 2: it means that you're you're gay, or that you are 1080 00:50:48,880 --> 00:50:52,279 Speaker 2: even like hooking up with the same sex. But to 1081 00:50:52,520 --> 00:50:55,880 Speaker 2: just be straight and say, like I there's no spectrum, 1082 00:50:56,200 --> 00:50:59,160 Speaker 2: there's no I do think you're but I think that, 1083 00:50:59,320 --> 00:51:01,480 Speaker 2: but I think that historically and people that are identify 1084 00:51:01,520 --> 00:51:03,680 Speaker 2: as straight, who you know, whatever that is, it is 1085 00:51:03,760 --> 00:51:06,400 Speaker 2: what it is. I think that there's a definition that 1086 00:51:06,640 --> 00:51:10,239 Speaker 2: we in Western society view us straight, and it's one 1087 00:51:10,280 --> 00:51:11,440 Speaker 2: hundred percent of something. 1088 00:51:11,880 --> 00:51:14,239 Speaker 1: If you're not one hundred percent of something, then you 1089 00:51:14,360 --> 00:51:15,120 Speaker 1: cannot be straight. 1090 00:51:15,200 --> 00:51:16,479 Speaker 4: And just what are we one hundred percent? 1091 00:51:16,840 --> 00:51:19,480 Speaker 2: So then everyone else that's that like sways back and 1092 00:51:19,600 --> 00:51:22,759 Speaker 2: forth between even just five percent. Like there's so much 1093 00:51:22,800 --> 00:51:27,520 Speaker 2: shame and like not understanding in that space. So yeah, 1094 00:51:27,560 --> 00:51:32,320 Speaker 2: I think it's just Western society has fucked us usual. 1095 00:51:33,000 --> 00:51:38,239 Speaker 4: I mean, yeah, so all to say, that's the intimacy part, right, 1096 00:51:38,360 --> 00:51:42,360 Speaker 4: and then we get to the artistry, you know, the 1097 00:51:42,880 --> 00:51:46,160 Speaker 4: creativity of it. And when we were going to play parties, 1098 00:51:46,200 --> 00:51:50,040 Speaker 4: you would see people flogging, you know, someone in the corner, 1099 00:51:50,320 --> 00:51:53,760 Speaker 4: or maybe dancing, or you'll see you know, maybe an instrument, 1100 00:51:55,880 --> 00:51:57,680 Speaker 4: but you I think you'd see more of like the 1101 00:51:57,760 --> 00:52:00,800 Speaker 4: kinky stuff, right, And it just wasn't the focus. And 1102 00:52:00,880 --> 00:52:02,920 Speaker 4: we had so many creative friends. When we first started it, 1103 00:52:02,960 --> 00:52:05,000 Speaker 4: we were like, yo, if everybody did like a little 1104 00:52:05,080 --> 00:52:10,880 Speaker 4: reformance exactly, like come on, exactly, you do the flogging 1105 00:52:11,000 --> 00:52:14,279 Speaker 4: thing you exactly. You love yoga, like you could do 1106 00:52:14,320 --> 00:52:17,319 Speaker 4: some making yoga, Like, come, we can figure this out. 1107 00:52:17,520 --> 00:52:19,760 Speaker 4: And so when it was all of us coming together 1108 00:52:19,920 --> 00:52:25,640 Speaker 4: to contribute to the space, it felt like every single 1109 00:52:25,680 --> 00:52:29,560 Speaker 4: one is different because it's different people given their energies. Uh. 1110 00:52:30,239 --> 00:52:32,799 Speaker 4: And then the expression is just it is just all 1111 00:52:32,840 --> 00:52:34,640 Speaker 4: over the place. I don't want to restrict it to 1112 00:52:34,880 --> 00:52:39,680 Speaker 4: just the BDSM world. You know, there's been couples where like, 1113 00:52:39,960 --> 00:52:41,960 Speaker 4: just so what I was saying earlier, like they were like, 1114 00:52:42,000 --> 00:52:45,000 Speaker 4: we do yoga, how do we make that section? I 1115 00:52:45,080 --> 00:52:48,359 Speaker 4: was like, just do nude yoga, you know, like, well, 1116 00:52:48,800 --> 00:52:51,160 Speaker 4: we'll put a kaleidoscope on you so like it don't 1117 00:52:51,160 --> 00:52:53,200 Speaker 4: even look like you're new. But like we'll put an 1118 00:52:53,239 --> 00:52:56,120 Speaker 4: infinity wall back there. So we're watching the silhouettes, you know, 1119 00:52:56,520 --> 00:52:58,640 Speaker 4: like here we go. They were like our boundaries, but 1120 00:52:58,719 --> 00:53:00,200 Speaker 4: then we just need to keep our bottoms on, like 1121 00:53:00,280 --> 00:53:05,120 Speaker 4: it doesn't matter. There's gonna be a kaleius exactly, like 1122 00:53:05,160 --> 00:53:07,160 Speaker 4: we want to respect your boundaries. We'll find ways to 1123 00:53:07,200 --> 00:53:10,279 Speaker 4: respect your boundaries and be super creative. You saw, you 1124 00:53:10,360 --> 00:53:11,840 Speaker 4: know the one that we just had the rodeo, We 1125 00:53:11,920 --> 00:53:14,319 Speaker 4: had the coyote ugly performance. 1126 00:53:14,480 --> 00:53:16,680 Speaker 3: It was grand. You know, I'm not going to even 1127 00:53:16,760 --> 00:53:19,720 Speaker 3: front walk me through this sex club experience. 1128 00:53:19,960 --> 00:53:20,880 Speaker 1: I didn't get to go to. 1129 00:53:22,360 --> 00:53:22,640 Speaker 4: I know. 1130 00:53:24,400 --> 00:53:26,680 Speaker 3: A it was rodeo themed, it was in bel air, 1131 00:53:27,040 --> 00:53:31,360 Speaker 3: it was a day party. So we got tested obviously 1132 00:53:31,520 --> 00:53:34,080 Speaker 3: at the last minute before, which was even a part 1133 00:53:34,080 --> 00:53:36,440 Speaker 3: of it, Like it kind of built up the anticipation, 1134 00:53:36,680 --> 00:53:39,040 Speaker 3: like we're going to do this thing, committed to that. 1135 00:53:39,160 --> 00:53:41,520 Speaker 1: Yeah, we're committed. We're going to this doctor and she 1136 00:53:41,600 --> 00:53:42,040 Speaker 1: had to go to this. 1137 00:53:42,239 --> 00:53:44,080 Speaker 2: I mean, it's a collective Yes, That's what I was 1138 00:53:44,120 --> 00:53:46,320 Speaker 2: talking about, even just in our couple's retreat, when you 1139 00:53:46,760 --> 00:53:50,280 Speaker 2: decide to do something in union together, it's a collective 1140 00:53:50,320 --> 00:53:52,480 Speaker 2: yes for your relationship. Even if your relationship isn't in 1141 00:53:52,560 --> 00:53:54,400 Speaker 2: a good place, at least you're starting somewhere. 1142 00:53:55,000 --> 00:53:56,359 Speaker 1: You both agreed to do some shit. 1143 00:53:56,440 --> 00:53:57,560 Speaker 4: I love the collective lesson. 1144 00:53:57,760 --> 00:54:01,439 Speaker 3: It's a great yeah, yes, open up the possibilities. You're 1145 00:54:01,440 --> 00:54:04,200 Speaker 3: already like in union of like, okay, we're doing it. 1146 00:54:04,600 --> 00:54:06,840 Speaker 1: The collaboration. We're collabing, baby, come on, let's go. 1147 00:54:07,000 --> 00:54:09,360 Speaker 3: And it's something we've had. We've obviously gone to play parties, 1148 00:54:09,400 --> 00:54:11,359 Speaker 3: but we haven't ended this one together before, and I've 1149 00:54:11,400 --> 00:54:13,759 Speaker 3: heard good things and I've talked to you seventeen times now, 1150 00:54:13,880 --> 00:54:17,120 Speaker 3: and so I'm like, yeah, my friend Michael Stone a party. 1151 00:54:18,280 --> 00:54:21,280 Speaker 3: Everyone came down this huge hill and like lots of people, 1152 00:54:21,520 --> 00:54:22,440 Speaker 3: you check your phone. 1153 00:54:23,360 --> 00:54:24,120 Speaker 1: You don't have your phone. 1154 00:54:24,120 --> 00:54:27,240 Speaker 4: Oh yeah. We have three rules for this Slott party 1155 00:54:27,280 --> 00:54:31,640 Speaker 4: that we're having. No phones, no money, no hierarchy. These 1156 00:54:31,680 --> 00:54:36,000 Speaker 4: are the things in society that create anxiety, you know, 1157 00:54:36,160 --> 00:54:39,440 Speaker 4: And our goal is to create a space to decrease anxiety. 1158 00:54:39,800 --> 00:54:41,839 Speaker 4: And if we get in decreased anxiety, especially in those 1159 00:54:41,920 --> 00:54:46,759 Speaker 4: categories around other people, then we increase the chances of vulnerability. 1160 00:54:47,360 --> 00:54:50,440 Speaker 4: And by increasing vulnerability, then we increase the chances of 1161 00:54:50,480 --> 00:54:53,560 Speaker 4: authentic connection. And like that's what this whole thing is about, 1162 00:54:54,239 --> 00:54:57,000 Speaker 4: whether you're being vulnerable, like sharing a story like your 1163 00:54:57,040 --> 00:54:58,960 Speaker 4: first three some and how it went with somebody, you know, 1164 00:54:59,080 --> 00:55:00,640 Speaker 4: Like this is the space where you don't have to 1165 00:55:00,680 --> 00:55:03,960 Speaker 4: whisper at the dinner table, you know, you can just 1166 00:55:04,280 --> 00:55:07,960 Speaker 4: talk about this freely, explore freely as well. I think 1167 00:55:08,000 --> 00:55:10,160 Speaker 4: that's another part of it. When you arrive we have 1168 00:55:10,320 --> 00:55:13,640 Speaker 4: a I mean we've had like the fire spaking area, 1169 00:55:13,680 --> 00:55:15,359 Speaker 4: but this one we had the Sabari station. 1170 00:55:15,680 --> 00:55:18,640 Speaker 3: Yeah, there was like a huge dom in it. There 1171 00:55:18,719 --> 00:55:21,760 Speaker 3: was another dome. There's another dome look like the inside 1172 00:55:21,760 --> 00:55:25,560 Speaker 3: of a disco ball. There is a human, a human 1173 00:55:25,600 --> 00:55:26,160 Speaker 3: petting zoo. 1174 00:55:26,480 --> 00:55:29,960 Speaker 1: What people getting pet? Did you go? I did? I 1175 00:55:30,080 --> 00:55:31,680 Speaker 1: know you did? You're a little kiddie. Did you have? 1176 00:55:31,840 --> 00:55:33,640 Speaker 4: I do a lot of a lot of Were you 1177 00:55:34,120 --> 00:55:36,879 Speaker 4: a pet or were you a pet? Or a pet? 1178 00:55:38,239 --> 00:55:40,520 Speaker 3: I was a cat? Okay, but I forgot my ears 1179 00:55:40,560 --> 00:55:42,719 Speaker 3: at home. It's just disappointing. But yeah, they grew out 1180 00:55:42,719 --> 00:55:43,040 Speaker 3: of your head. 1181 00:55:43,280 --> 00:55:45,960 Speaker 1: Yeah, but you know, I was like checking it off. 1182 00:55:46,000 --> 00:55:47,839 Speaker 3: I was all excited to do all the things you're 1183 00:55:47,880 --> 00:55:50,600 Speaker 3: like first available and then this guy was white man 1184 00:55:50,640 --> 00:55:52,200 Speaker 3: walks over me the leash. 1185 00:55:54,000 --> 00:55:55,200 Speaker 4: And I was like, are you read? 1186 00:55:56,800 --> 00:55:58,279 Speaker 1: I was like, oh my god, I didn't think this 1187 00:55:59,760 --> 00:56:04,040 Speaker 1: says sure yeah, uh huh. First of I was like oh. 1188 00:56:04,840 --> 00:56:06,560 Speaker 3: And then I told Orlando like quickly, like I don't 1189 00:56:06,560 --> 00:56:11,040 Speaker 3: think I thought this. He was already it was you 1190 00:56:11,160 --> 00:56:13,680 Speaker 3: not letting go. He's a nice white man. And I 1191 00:56:13,920 --> 00:56:17,960 Speaker 3: walked on all fours. He pet me, he fed me carrots, carrots. Yeah, 1192 00:56:18,320 --> 00:56:20,480 Speaker 3: and so there was some pretzels he got like he 1193 00:56:20,560 --> 00:56:22,960 Speaker 3: put my drink in a bowl, of course, and he 1194 00:56:23,080 --> 00:56:25,200 Speaker 3: brushed my hair and he spanked me a little bit. 1195 00:56:25,360 --> 00:56:26,359 Speaker 4: Did he put water in there? 1196 00:56:26,800 --> 00:56:28,640 Speaker 3: I put Orlando came and brought me my drink. 1197 00:56:28,840 --> 00:56:31,600 Speaker 4: Yeah, exactly. There was a couple other people out there 1198 00:56:31,880 --> 00:56:34,800 Speaker 4: that had bowls and I was like, I was in 1199 00:56:34,880 --> 00:56:37,439 Speaker 4: the pettis as well as like you gonna drink your water. 1200 00:56:38,640 --> 00:56:40,120 Speaker 4: They looked at me. He's like, I'm a bunny and 1201 00:56:40,200 --> 00:56:40,879 Speaker 4: that's white claw. 1202 00:56:43,239 --> 00:56:45,200 Speaker 1: I was trying to talk and he was like, kiddies, 1203 00:56:45,239 --> 00:56:49,239 Speaker 1: don't talk. I was like, yeah, he was very nice man. 1204 00:56:49,440 --> 00:56:54,320 Speaker 3: There was also a mechanical bowl. There was a beautiful 1205 00:56:54,360 --> 00:56:56,960 Speaker 3: infinity pool with a beautiful view of Los Angeles. It 1206 00:56:57,080 --> 00:56:59,640 Speaker 3: was pretty warm during the day. Everybody was wearing their shit. 1207 00:57:00,080 --> 00:57:02,120 Speaker 3: I love an infinity pool me too. I was like 1208 00:57:02,200 --> 00:57:04,640 Speaker 3: doing a solo swim and if I was swimming then 1209 00:57:04,719 --> 00:57:05,439 Speaker 3: you know it was warm. 1210 00:57:06,400 --> 00:57:08,440 Speaker 4: Also, I want to point out that, like I love 1211 00:57:08,600 --> 00:57:11,360 Speaker 4: at this space that everybody can wear that sexy outfit, 1212 00:57:12,080 --> 00:57:14,680 Speaker 4: like you have the sexy uh you thought it was 1213 00:57:14,719 --> 00:57:23,000 Speaker 4: too sexy? Cowgirl, cow, cowboy outfit, cow person outfit. There 1214 00:57:23,040 --> 00:57:25,440 Speaker 4: were cows there. There was there, remember the cow started 1215 00:57:25,440 --> 00:57:25,680 Speaker 4: it off. 1216 00:57:25,720 --> 00:57:27,240 Speaker 1: It was real right there was. 1217 00:57:29,000 --> 00:57:33,480 Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, inflated cow costume that then decated and there 1218 00:57:33,520 --> 00:57:38,720 Speaker 3: were utters, multiple utters. Have you ever seen an erotic 1219 00:57:38,840 --> 00:57:41,600 Speaker 3: dance with a woman with utters? I would say that 1220 00:57:41,640 --> 00:57:44,040 Speaker 3: would be a first. So yeah, that was that caught 1221 00:57:44,080 --> 00:57:48,640 Speaker 3: me by surprise. There was an attempt at the electric slide. 1222 00:57:49,720 --> 00:57:52,760 Speaker 3: I tried by mess with Michael tried. You know, I 1223 00:57:53,080 --> 00:57:55,800 Speaker 3: really applied to you for your choreographyographer dream. 1224 00:57:55,960 --> 00:58:00,800 Speaker 4: Yeah, it was. I spent half of my life in Houston, Texas. 1225 00:58:01,240 --> 00:58:04,480 Speaker 4: You know, I love Houston. They have rodeos out there, 1226 00:58:04,760 --> 00:58:07,640 Speaker 4: so it was a little homage to my experience at Houston. 1227 00:58:07,920 --> 00:58:11,200 Speaker 4: It was great, but the point is they weren't able 1228 00:58:11,320 --> 00:58:14,600 Speaker 4: to They weren't able to dance. Like, first off, we're 1229 00:58:14,600 --> 00:58:16,840 Speaker 4: in lost, We're in Los Angeles, so this isn't the 1230 00:58:16,920 --> 00:58:19,280 Speaker 4: line dancing bunch, you know, and it's like different. The 1231 00:58:19,320 --> 00:58:21,120 Speaker 4: whole team is like super diverse, right. 1232 00:58:21,400 --> 00:58:23,720 Speaker 1: I was gonna say, are they black or not? 1233 00:58:24,280 --> 00:58:24,320 Speaker 3: No? 1234 00:58:24,360 --> 00:58:25,800 Speaker 4: No, no, it's just a diverse team. 1235 00:58:25,840 --> 00:58:29,280 Speaker 1: I mean it was not a traditional fancy ones that 1236 00:58:29,280 --> 00:58:29,680 Speaker 1: they be doing. 1237 00:58:30,280 --> 00:58:33,240 Speaker 3: They be doing like four extra segul You know, you 1238 00:58:33,320 --> 00:58:36,160 Speaker 3: don't electric side to the country music though, yes. 1239 00:58:36,120 --> 00:58:39,160 Speaker 4: We did, so I had to what happened. What happened 1240 00:58:39,280 --> 00:58:46,960 Speaker 4: was it was a breaky heart. You know, it's not that. 1241 00:58:47,400 --> 00:58:50,960 Speaker 4: But the one thing is like they'll all know the 1242 00:58:51,040 --> 00:58:53,080 Speaker 4: electric side. It's something that we don't have to practice 1243 00:58:53,080 --> 00:58:54,560 Speaker 4: if you've been to a black wedding, like we're gonna 1244 00:58:54,560 --> 00:58:57,760 Speaker 4: see who actually you know into black spaces. Uh. And 1245 00:58:57,920 --> 00:59:00,520 Speaker 4: there was enough of them that tried to where it was. 1246 00:59:01,160 --> 00:59:01,760 Speaker 1: It was great. 1247 00:59:01,920 --> 00:59:02,800 Speaker 4: It was like fifty of us. 1248 00:59:03,200 --> 00:59:05,800 Speaker 3: It was great. It lasted all of maybe behalf a 1249 00:59:05,880 --> 00:59:08,440 Speaker 3: circle and we did it was and I really did 1250 00:59:08,600 --> 00:59:11,520 Speaker 3: enjoy the eye stair exercise. 1251 00:59:12,000 --> 00:59:14,040 Speaker 1: What would you say the age range of these parties is? 1252 00:59:14,960 --> 00:59:15,720 Speaker 1: Is there an age range? 1253 00:59:15,800 --> 00:59:19,840 Speaker 4: Yeah, it's like, you know, twenty one to forty I 1254 00:59:19,880 --> 00:59:21,840 Speaker 4: think ninety four percent of the people that attend our 1255 00:59:21,880 --> 00:59:24,920 Speaker 4: parties are between the age of twenty one and forty five. 1256 00:59:25,360 --> 00:59:27,040 Speaker 1: Oh wow, that's a big range. 1257 00:59:27,240 --> 00:59:30,919 Speaker 4: Yeah, the average age being like thirty three thirty five. 1258 00:59:31,480 --> 00:59:33,680 Speaker 1: I mean like the Coors will have the there's a 1259 00:59:33,760 --> 00:59:36,400 Speaker 1: variety of which generation are you looking for? 1260 00:59:37,040 --> 00:59:38,840 Speaker 3: We have a pleth threat. It was it was a 1261 00:59:38,920 --> 00:59:41,400 Speaker 3: nice amount of people there and then there was a dungeon. 1262 00:59:42,320 --> 00:59:44,280 Speaker 3: There was sandwiches like what do you. 1263 00:59:44,280 --> 00:59:46,240 Speaker 1: Say a dungeon. Is it like in the basement, Like, 1264 00:59:46,280 --> 00:59:47,000 Speaker 1: what is a dungeon? 1265 00:59:47,080 --> 00:59:48,640 Speaker 3: It was a side of the house. It had a 1266 00:59:48,760 --> 00:59:53,800 Speaker 3: separate entrance, It was a dark room. There was waterbeds 1267 00:59:53,840 --> 00:59:57,040 Speaker 3: with cages underneath. There was just a milking station. 1268 00:59:57,240 --> 01:00:00,280 Speaker 1: I think you call it waterbeds with cages under meet 1269 01:00:00,320 --> 01:00:00,800 Speaker 1: the waterbed. 1270 01:00:00,960 --> 01:00:02,040 Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't know how they do it. 1271 01:00:02,360 --> 01:00:03,919 Speaker 1: Like the water bed was on top of the cage. 1272 01:00:04,200 --> 01:00:07,760 Speaker 1: That seems Oh so you could No, you can on 1273 01:00:08,880 --> 01:00:09,600 Speaker 1: you can be in the cage. 1274 01:00:09,680 --> 01:00:11,440 Speaker 4: It's still a box. You can't see like that. It's 1275 01:00:11,440 --> 01:00:14,280 Speaker 4: a waterbed, but you could just like when you're you're 1276 01:00:14,360 --> 01:00:16,440 Speaker 4: on a waterbed or when somebody's in the cage and 1277 01:00:16,560 --> 01:00:18,720 Speaker 4: like that's you're not seeing what's through. But we did 1278 01:00:18,760 --> 01:00:21,000 Speaker 4: put mirrors on the side so that if you're in 1279 01:00:21,160 --> 01:00:23,360 Speaker 4: the cage, you could look up and see the people 1280 01:00:23,400 --> 01:00:24,400 Speaker 4: on the bed and the people in the bag and 1281 01:00:24,480 --> 01:00:28,520 Speaker 4: look down what's happening in the cage. But have you 1282 01:00:28,560 --> 01:00:29,720 Speaker 4: seen a you know what a sybyan is. 1283 01:00:30,560 --> 01:00:31,760 Speaker 3: Nobody knows what is that? 1284 01:00:31,760 --> 01:00:36,120 Speaker 1: What we're talking about times before you guys were talking 1285 01:00:36,120 --> 01:00:38,680 Speaker 1: about earlier. Yeah, please explain, because no, I still don't 1286 01:00:38,720 --> 01:00:38,920 Speaker 1: get it. 1287 01:00:39,200 --> 01:00:40,600 Speaker 3: The whole no, not the hole. 1288 01:00:41,000 --> 01:00:41,560 Speaker 1: It's a sybby. 1289 01:00:41,640 --> 01:00:43,880 Speaker 3: He said, this gonna be a four seater sybyan what 1290 01:00:44,680 --> 01:00:44,880 Speaker 3: let me. 1291 01:00:44,880 --> 01:00:45,400 Speaker 1: Tell you what it is. 1292 01:00:46,080 --> 01:00:49,160 Speaker 3: It's it looks like almost like a mechanical bowl, like 1293 01:00:49,240 --> 01:00:50,440 Speaker 3: it looks like were you put. 1294 01:00:50,360 --> 01:00:51,440 Speaker 1: Oh is it like those chairs? 1295 01:00:51,520 --> 01:00:53,840 Speaker 3: Yeah, you straddle on each side. But there's four okay, 1296 01:00:53,920 --> 01:00:56,200 Speaker 3: so we could be facing each other and it's between us. 1297 01:00:56,200 --> 01:00:56,600 Speaker 1: There's four. 1298 01:00:56,680 --> 01:01:00,280 Speaker 4: What you see that pillow right there? That's that's the pillow. 1299 01:01:00,360 --> 01:01:02,440 Speaker 4: Like if you were to straddle the piddle, there'd be 1300 01:01:02,480 --> 01:01:05,520 Speaker 4: a vibrator on top of the pillow right there, like 1301 01:01:05,680 --> 01:01:10,120 Speaker 4: sticking out no long ways, like like on its side 1302 01:01:10,200 --> 01:01:10,560 Speaker 4: that way. 1303 01:01:11,800 --> 01:01:20,840 Speaker 3: Yes, did just like a vibrating thing. A nubre of 1304 01:01:20,920 --> 01:01:22,760 Speaker 3: these on a bench. So me and three friends could 1305 01:01:22,840 --> 01:01:25,800 Speaker 3: jump on and there's controls on the side and we go. 1306 01:01:26,520 --> 01:01:27,800 Speaker 1: So this sounds crat. 1307 01:01:27,840 --> 01:01:33,240 Speaker 3: I met a girl on there. I force you to 1308 01:01:33,280 --> 01:01:34,680 Speaker 3: see you until like twos on it and we were 1309 01:01:34,680 --> 01:01:36,480 Speaker 3: facing each other and she turned hords on and then 1310 01:01:36,480 --> 01:01:40,800 Speaker 3: I turned on and I said. We giggled and she said, 1311 01:01:40,960 --> 01:01:42,840 Speaker 3: I think here's a man. I said, I think so too, 1312 01:01:42,920 --> 01:01:45,640 Speaker 3: and then we switched and it was great. Well, so 1313 01:01:45,840 --> 01:01:48,000 Speaker 3: it was teamwork. I never seen one of those before. 1314 01:01:48,480 --> 01:01:51,320 Speaker 3: There was another cage. There's a cage on the bottom 1315 01:01:51,400 --> 01:01:54,200 Speaker 3: and like a padding on the top, like a mattress 1316 01:01:54,320 --> 01:01:56,360 Speaker 3: on the top. And I went in the cage. I 1317 01:01:56,800 --> 01:02:07,760 Speaker 3: did some big cat activities. That big, big activity. I 1318 01:02:07,880 --> 01:02:11,000 Speaker 3: literally what I thought about big activities. 1319 01:02:16,040 --> 01:02:18,680 Speaker 1: Oh my god, I can't, Sweetie, one time I get 1320 01:02:18,680 --> 01:02:21,040 Speaker 1: you on this goddamn show. We're gonna get sweet I 1321 01:02:21,160 --> 01:02:21,400 Speaker 1: love you. 1322 01:02:22,280 --> 01:02:23,680 Speaker 3: You're watching She's coming. 1323 01:02:24,280 --> 01:02:25,760 Speaker 4: That was I mean, that was one. I want to 1324 01:02:26,000 --> 01:02:28,080 Speaker 4: point out. This is one of our places. If you 1325 01:02:28,240 --> 01:02:29,720 Speaker 4: go and all this ship ain't there. You know we 1326 01:02:29,800 --> 01:02:30,480 Speaker 4: got locations. 1327 01:02:31,600 --> 01:02:33,520 Speaker 3: Well this is a great location. Sorry, I'm going really 1328 01:02:33,560 --> 01:02:36,640 Speaker 3: deep in. I mean, it just it was vast. There 1329 01:02:36,720 --> 01:02:40,000 Speaker 3: was live music. At one point I did a promptu 1330 01:02:40,600 --> 01:02:44,520 Speaker 3: lyrical bellery to dance to live piano classical music while 1331 01:02:44,520 --> 01:02:49,000 Speaker 3: the pianos was getting getting head. It was beautiful. I 1332 01:02:49,160 --> 01:02:55,520 Speaker 3: was an activation. I didn't even know it. Michael, this 1333 01:02:55,800 --> 01:02:57,600 Speaker 3: is the whole week. 1334 01:02:57,480 --> 01:02:59,560 Speaker 1: Because that's what you were doing out there. Literally, I was. 1335 01:02:59,760 --> 01:03:03,160 Speaker 1: It was very real. Yeah, should see your wedding? 1336 01:03:03,600 --> 01:03:03,960 Speaker 4: Was hi? 1337 01:03:04,120 --> 01:03:04,760 Speaker 1: What was going on? 1338 01:03:05,000 --> 01:03:09,560 Speaker 3: It was extrava putting my hair up on things on 1339 01:03:09,680 --> 01:03:13,880 Speaker 3: the floor. It was so intense you I would have 1340 01:03:13,920 --> 01:03:17,240 Speaker 3: been proud. I was like making love to the pianoist. 1341 01:03:17,320 --> 01:03:19,080 Speaker 3: But he was like a threesum. He was getting head, 1342 01:03:19,120 --> 01:03:20,680 Speaker 3: he was playing music. I was looking at him, he 1343 01:03:20,760 --> 01:03:23,880 Speaker 3: was looking he was playing for me. It was so intense. 1344 01:03:24,280 --> 01:03:25,479 Speaker 3: Do you need to give me his number? 1345 01:03:25,800 --> 01:03:27,720 Speaker 4: I can't do that. We actually have an app. 1346 01:03:27,920 --> 01:03:30,280 Speaker 1: We were supposed to exchange Instagrams and. 1347 01:03:30,280 --> 01:03:30,760 Speaker 3: Then I left. 1348 01:03:30,800 --> 01:03:32,040 Speaker 4: This is this is why we have our app. We 1349 01:03:32,080 --> 01:03:34,640 Speaker 4: have an application for everybody's there on the app because 1350 01:03:34,680 --> 01:03:35,800 Speaker 4: you don't have your phones. 1351 01:03:35,680 --> 01:03:38,080 Speaker 1: So they can still wait. So you guys can communicate later. 1352 01:03:38,240 --> 01:03:41,280 Speaker 4: Like after the party, like hey, because our phones were away, 1353 01:03:41,320 --> 01:03:43,360 Speaker 4: I can find you on the app and like that man, 1354 01:03:43,560 --> 01:03:45,000 Speaker 4: that that I did. 1355 01:03:44,960 --> 01:03:47,080 Speaker 3: That activation where I dance in front We made a 1356 01:03:47,200 --> 01:03:49,120 Speaker 3: three ways threesome in front of your piano. 1357 01:03:49,160 --> 01:03:52,800 Speaker 4: Please yes, exactly, And it becomes like a better than dancing, 1358 01:03:53,080 --> 01:03:54,520 Speaker 4: and it's like swiping and stuff. 1359 01:03:55,400 --> 01:04:00,360 Speaker 1: You can answer. In the case big cat activity, that 1360 01:04:00,480 --> 01:04:01,120 Speaker 1: was a different cat. 1361 01:04:03,880 --> 01:04:05,919 Speaker 3: Oh my god, obviously I had a time. 1362 01:04:06,160 --> 01:04:07,760 Speaker 1: This sounds like damn it. 1363 01:04:08,000 --> 01:04:08,720 Speaker 4: I was in New York. 1364 01:04:09,200 --> 01:04:11,920 Speaker 1: I will be your next one. When is your next one? 1365 01:04:12,600 --> 01:04:17,240 Speaker 3: We've got to get back the day of I didn't 1366 01:04:17,240 --> 01:04:19,000 Speaker 3: come back my third you don't know what time? 1367 01:04:19,400 --> 01:04:21,560 Speaker 4: Well, what time is it is during the day and ship, Yeah, 1368 01:04:21,600 --> 01:04:25,240 Speaker 4: it's then the play rent fair renda Renaissance fair? 1369 01:04:25,600 --> 01:04:27,479 Speaker 1: Are you coming back about the place? 1370 01:04:27,560 --> 01:04:31,440 Speaker 4: Bitch? Was the one? The one after that is going 1371 01:04:31,560 --> 01:04:37,680 Speaker 4: to be, I believe like June fifth, that weekends June fifth. 1372 01:04:38,200 --> 01:04:41,520 Speaker 4: It is the play camp. It's like big camp vibes. 1373 01:04:41,600 --> 01:04:43,360 Speaker 4: Have you ever a camp? You know? 1374 01:04:44,360 --> 01:04:46,640 Speaker 2: One time I went camping in Montana that was great, okay, 1375 01:04:46,640 --> 01:04:47,920 Speaker 2: and then I camped to Coachell. 1376 01:04:47,680 --> 01:04:48,120 Speaker 1: A few times. 1377 01:04:48,160 --> 01:04:48,920 Speaker 4: That was so. 1378 01:04:49,280 --> 01:04:52,000 Speaker 2: I mean, it's still this sounds like it might be better. 1379 01:04:52,080 --> 01:04:55,680 Speaker 2: What's the sleep situation? Like, are there mattresses or is. 1380 01:04:55,680 --> 01:04:56,360 Speaker 1: It blow me up? 1381 01:04:56,440 --> 01:04:59,640 Speaker 4: Mattress blow up? I wish I could describe the inside 1382 01:04:59,760 --> 01:05:02,280 Speaker 4: of the place to you with the mattresses. 1383 01:05:03,560 --> 01:05:07,240 Speaker 1: Oh, I mean, I mean I love mattresses. 1384 01:05:07,280 --> 01:05:08,520 Speaker 3: I think that there are mattresses. 1385 01:05:08,600 --> 01:05:14,960 Speaker 4: They were yes, sleeping back. No, we'll have like some 1386 01:05:15,120 --> 01:05:17,520 Speaker 4: tints set up for people who want to spend the night. 1387 01:05:17,640 --> 01:05:19,480 Speaker 4: You know, we're gonna We're gonna make it. This will 1388 01:05:19,480 --> 01:05:20,920 Speaker 4: be our first one where people can spend the night. 1389 01:05:21,040 --> 01:05:24,720 Speaker 1: Wow, that's gonna be a little mystical little sorry is 1390 01:05:24,800 --> 01:05:28,080 Speaker 1: going to I'm not gonna say coach was horrible. 1391 01:05:28,120 --> 01:05:29,960 Speaker 2: It's horrible because now I would never do it, but 1392 01:05:30,040 --> 01:05:32,200 Speaker 2: when I was young, and because we were sleeping on 1393 01:05:32,240 --> 01:05:33,240 Speaker 2: the floor like the background. 1394 01:05:33,880 --> 01:05:35,880 Speaker 3: Yeah, not even the backseat of the car, Like what 1395 01:05:36,000 --> 01:05:36,320 Speaker 3: the no? 1396 01:05:36,760 --> 01:05:39,439 Speaker 1: You couldn't you have to know. Wait, let's talk about 1397 01:05:39,480 --> 01:05:42,240 Speaker 1: your coach experience camping if you camped. 1398 01:05:42,320 --> 01:05:43,760 Speaker 4: But yeah, but I mean you're not sleeping like on 1399 01:05:43,920 --> 01:05:46,200 Speaker 4: well okay, if you have you have a tint with Okay, 1400 01:05:46,200 --> 01:05:47,800 Speaker 4: I thought you were like sleeping outside on the ground 1401 01:05:47,920 --> 01:05:48,280 Speaker 4: like damn. 1402 01:05:50,480 --> 01:05:53,600 Speaker 1: However, whatever I was going, you know, I was seventeen, 1403 01:05:53,600 --> 01:05:54,360 Speaker 1: I really give a fuck. 1404 01:05:54,400 --> 01:05:58,520 Speaker 2: Okay, fair enough, pay nothing dollars because I was sneaking 1405 01:05:58,560 --> 01:06:00,320 Speaker 2: in so Aria. 1406 01:06:00,360 --> 01:06:02,440 Speaker 1: You know, I second to Coachella for four years straight. 1407 01:06:02,960 --> 01:06:04,640 Speaker 1: She's like mom, and I was like, why am I 1408 01:06:04,720 --> 01:06:08,680 Speaker 1: telling my daughter this? I'm cool? I told her exactly, 1409 01:06:08,680 --> 01:06:10,520 Speaker 1: how you want to? 1410 01:06:11,240 --> 01:06:14,120 Speaker 2: Oh yeah, so two of us would there'd be two 1411 01:06:14,160 --> 01:06:16,320 Speaker 2: people that need a ticket, so we would all so 1412 01:06:16,600 --> 01:06:18,400 Speaker 2: technic wasn't free, but we'd all split the price of 1413 01:06:18,440 --> 01:06:20,040 Speaker 2: these two tickets, so there would be like ten of us. 1414 01:06:20,480 --> 01:06:22,320 Speaker 1: So then we would have two people go in. 1415 01:06:22,560 --> 01:06:24,400 Speaker 2: One person would take off their wristband and bring it 1416 01:06:24,480 --> 01:06:27,360 Speaker 2: out and then go give it and we just keep 1417 01:06:27,400 --> 01:06:28,760 Speaker 2: doing that over and over and overtook. 1418 01:06:35,320 --> 01:06:37,800 Speaker 1: Anyway, what I was saying about until like last year, 1419 01:06:38,760 --> 01:06:39,200 Speaker 1: it's true. 1420 01:06:39,960 --> 01:06:41,160 Speaker 4: I love hearing your. 1421 01:06:43,000 --> 01:06:45,880 Speaker 2: If you guys have not listened to our very classic 1422 01:06:45,960 --> 01:06:48,480 Speaker 2: Coachella episodes, I implore you to do so. 1423 01:06:48,920 --> 01:06:50,680 Speaker 1: It's called Momchella. It's a series. 1424 01:06:50,760 --> 01:06:55,120 Speaker 2: It's very important, and Momlla it is very important journalism 1425 01:06:55,400 --> 01:06:59,560 Speaker 2: and life telling experiences that must be heard. But I 1426 01:06:59,640 --> 01:07:02,680 Speaker 2: will say when I was the camping site at night, 1427 01:07:03,000 --> 01:07:07,960 Speaker 2: was fucking at bit raging. It was just like i' 1428 01:07:07,960 --> 01:07:12,240 Speaker 2: mean also granted I was on drugs, was very much 1429 01:07:12,320 --> 01:07:14,400 Speaker 2: on drugs, but only the good kind. 1430 01:07:14,680 --> 01:07:17,080 Speaker 1: And it was just like a fairy tale land. It 1431 01:07:17,160 --> 01:07:20,680 Speaker 1: felt like it was just the lighting. There were swings, 1432 01:07:21,080 --> 01:07:24,080 Speaker 1: like there was like fire blowers. 1433 01:07:24,440 --> 01:07:27,240 Speaker 2: There were like tents with music obviously and obviously like 1434 01:07:27,240 --> 01:07:29,120 Speaker 2: I'm assuming this is going to be similar to the vibe, 1435 01:07:29,120 --> 01:07:31,360 Speaker 2: but it just like you know, you come alive at 1436 01:07:31,360 --> 01:07:33,000 Speaker 2: that time at night, and so when you're in camp, 1437 01:07:33,040 --> 01:07:35,920 Speaker 2: which is so playful, I mean, it's just I don't 1438 01:07:35,920 --> 01:07:37,000 Speaker 2: know it's a recipe for it. 1439 01:07:37,080 --> 01:07:38,200 Speaker 1: And then it's just you keep going. 1440 01:07:39,040 --> 01:07:41,280 Speaker 4: I've been fortunate to go to a bunch of festivals, 1441 01:07:41,400 --> 01:07:43,400 Speaker 4: and I think that's the vibe I'm trying to bring 1442 01:07:43,480 --> 01:07:46,840 Speaker 4: to the play instead of making it a party, because 1443 01:07:46,840 --> 01:07:48,520 Speaker 4: there's a lot of play parties out there, and it's 1444 01:07:48,840 --> 01:07:51,680 Speaker 4: you know, these four hour experiences. You get there at ten, 1445 01:07:51,960 --> 01:07:54,800 Speaker 4: you know you leave it too. This party was a 1446 01:07:54,840 --> 01:07:55,760 Speaker 4: ten hour experience. 1447 01:07:56,160 --> 01:07:58,960 Speaker 3: Yes it was, and you have the first two I 1448 01:07:59,080 --> 01:08:00,360 Speaker 3: stay for I think nine. 1449 01:08:00,920 --> 01:08:02,520 Speaker 4: I mean yeah, I'm gonna say because I remember see 1450 01:08:02,520 --> 01:08:04,080 Speaker 4: it eleven. 1451 01:08:04,320 --> 01:08:07,880 Speaker 1: Oh wow, Yeah, I mean yeah, because once you're in it, Yeah, 1452 01:08:07,920 --> 01:08:11,440 Speaker 1: we're in it. Where we're here? Where are we gonna be? 1453 01:08:12,840 --> 01:08:15,640 Speaker 4: So what what ends up happening is you know everybody 1454 01:08:15,720 --> 01:08:17,439 Speaker 4: is allowed to bring like a bag or you bring 1455 01:08:17,479 --> 01:08:19,080 Speaker 4: a coat. You know, we have a bag coach check. 1456 01:08:19,200 --> 01:08:21,559 Speaker 4: So in the bag we encourage everybody just like bring 1457 01:08:21,680 --> 01:08:24,280 Speaker 4: something for the space. It's it's I don't know if 1458 01:08:24,280 --> 01:08:25,599 Speaker 4: you guys have been to Burning Man yet. 1459 01:08:26,400 --> 01:08:28,320 Speaker 1: Oh my friend Jared is a Burner. 1460 01:08:29,640 --> 01:08:30,800 Speaker 4: Have you guys gone to Bernie Man yet? 1461 01:08:30,840 --> 01:08:31,280 Speaker 1: I want to go. 1462 01:08:31,720 --> 01:08:33,840 Speaker 4: Oh my goodness, you would love it. Shout out to 1463 01:08:33,880 --> 01:08:36,800 Speaker 4: the black Burners. You know, there's a whole organization and 1464 01:08:36,920 --> 01:08:39,000 Speaker 4: meeting up with black people. There's like there's a time, 1465 01:08:39,600 --> 01:08:41,800 Speaker 4: and you hear it from other black people at Bernie Man. 1466 01:08:41,840 --> 01:08:43,679 Speaker 4: They're like, we're gonna meet up Thursday after set. 1467 01:08:46,280 --> 01:08:49,120 Speaker 1: Maybe, So I feel like we're late now though. Bernie 1468 01:08:49,120 --> 01:08:50,400 Speaker 1: Mans still like what it was. 1469 01:08:50,680 --> 01:08:52,760 Speaker 4: It's never not going to be a thing. It's got 1470 01:08:52,840 --> 01:08:56,520 Speaker 4: every festival you could imagine inside of it. The creativity 1471 01:08:56,600 --> 01:08:57,200 Speaker 4: is the currency. 1472 01:08:57,640 --> 01:08:59,840 Speaker 2: And yeah, that's what I remember and recalling, like all 1473 01:08:59,880 --> 01:09:03,520 Speaker 2: the pictures that I would see and just the burning many. 1474 01:09:03,800 --> 01:09:06,439 Speaker 4: So what ends up happening is because you have, you know, 1475 01:09:06,640 --> 01:09:09,479 Speaker 4: a lot of people who are just creative in our space, 1476 01:09:09,520 --> 01:09:14,120 Speaker 4: because we're for the artists. You know, fire throwers are happening. 1477 01:09:14,160 --> 01:09:15,640 Speaker 4: Like you were in the play space. I was in 1478 01:09:15,720 --> 01:09:18,559 Speaker 4: the playspace, you know, and I mean we were there 1479 01:09:19,200 --> 01:09:21,200 Speaker 4: when they're out the window. Yes, exactly. Like there's a 1480 01:09:21,240 --> 01:09:22,839 Speaker 4: big play space where a bunch of people. 1481 01:09:22,680 --> 01:09:26,679 Speaker 3: There's like literally sorry to cut, there's like huge beds, 1482 01:09:26,840 --> 01:09:29,640 Speaker 3: high up mattresses behind the DJ. So the j is 1483 01:09:29,680 --> 01:09:31,640 Speaker 3: just spinning. The people just behind them just suck it, 1484 01:09:32,040 --> 01:09:36,400 Speaker 3: and there's there's ceiling to floor windows and Orlando's like 1485 01:09:36,439 --> 01:09:37,960 Speaker 3: behind me, like like me and I look over to 1486 01:09:38,000 --> 01:09:39,560 Speaker 3: the window and it's like someone in the in the 1487 01:09:39,600 --> 01:09:43,280 Speaker 3: window playing with fire, Like what time is it? 1488 01:09:44,360 --> 01:09:45,200 Speaker 4: Like caual the fire? 1489 01:09:46,040 --> 01:09:49,120 Speaker 3: Who Then three minutes later and they go away and 1490 01:09:49,200 --> 01:09:52,000 Speaker 3: somebody another guy comes like I'm like, there's another fire. 1491 01:09:52,880 --> 01:09:57,920 Speaker 3: They did fucking ten fifty seven. There's hot muffins ready, yeah, 1492 01:09:58,080 --> 01:10:00,360 Speaker 3: Like I didn't know I wanted to warm and right 1493 01:10:00,360 --> 01:10:02,120 Speaker 3: now at ten fifty nine. But whoever's on the queue, 1494 01:10:02,120 --> 01:10:03,160 Speaker 3: everybody's on quell. 1495 01:10:03,520 --> 01:10:05,600 Speaker 4: I mean, that's that's the cool part about being on 1496 01:10:06,000 --> 01:10:08,560 Speaker 4: my team and shout out to the play team. Like 1497 01:10:08,640 --> 01:10:10,400 Speaker 4: we call them the dream team because we're really making 1498 01:10:10,479 --> 01:10:13,120 Speaker 4: dreams come true over here. And with all of them, 1499 01:10:13,200 --> 01:10:15,760 Speaker 4: like you know, I like to think, you know, they're 1500 01:10:16,040 --> 01:10:18,120 Speaker 4: they're party oh G's. You know, there's some people that 1501 01:10:18,160 --> 01:10:20,080 Speaker 4: are just party o G's in your circle, you know. 1502 01:10:20,680 --> 01:10:23,639 Speaker 4: I find a lot of them from different cultures around America, 1503 01:10:23,920 --> 01:10:28,040 Speaker 4: and they also will have like some speciality in the space. 1504 01:10:28,720 --> 01:10:30,320 Speaker 4: But when they all bring a little bit of magic 1505 01:10:30,600 --> 01:10:32,719 Speaker 4: and you start seeing it pop up, it inspires everybody 1506 01:10:32,720 --> 01:10:34,960 Speaker 4: else like, well everybody's doing it, you know, and then 1507 01:10:35,040 --> 01:10:37,439 Speaker 4: they start performing. Then you just get these random moments 1508 01:10:37,520 --> 01:10:41,040 Speaker 4: where you know, I sit My favorite part of every 1509 01:10:41,120 --> 01:10:44,920 Speaker 4: party is when we're like three fources of the way 1510 01:10:45,000 --> 01:10:47,160 Speaker 4: into the party and you take a step back and 1511 01:10:47,240 --> 01:10:52,240 Speaker 4: there's like a couple two couples meditating. You know, there's 1512 01:10:52,400 --> 01:10:55,960 Speaker 4: like a seven person massage line in the jacuzzie. You know, 1513 01:10:56,240 --> 01:10:59,320 Speaker 4: like there's a man playing the violin and then there's 1514 01:10:59,360 --> 01:11:01,519 Speaker 4: like a woman doing ballet in front of them. Uh, 1515 01:11:01,600 --> 01:11:05,120 Speaker 4: there's a pile of ten people over there, exactly your situation. 1516 01:11:05,360 --> 01:11:07,840 Speaker 4: Like there's a pilot of ten people over there and 1517 01:11:08,080 --> 01:11:10,360 Speaker 4: they're all playing. You know. Then there's right next to 1518 01:11:10,400 --> 01:11:12,160 Speaker 4: them as a cuddle puddle, and there's they're clearly having 1519 01:11:12,160 --> 01:11:14,559 Speaker 4: a deep conversation. You know. It's like you're seeing all 1520 01:11:14,640 --> 01:11:18,360 Speaker 4: of these elements of pleasure exactly. And that's why it's 1521 01:11:18,400 --> 01:11:20,160 Speaker 4: called the play because these these are the ways we 1522 01:11:20,240 --> 01:11:23,240 Speaker 4: can play with each other and not just the physical 1523 01:11:23,400 --> 01:11:27,400 Speaker 4: like and being an adult in playing as well. You know, 1524 01:11:27,640 --> 01:11:29,720 Speaker 4: was the last time we have a fire station where 1525 01:11:29,720 --> 01:11:32,120 Speaker 4: you can get a fire spanking, you know, and you 1526 01:11:32,240 --> 01:11:33,760 Speaker 4: just go over there. They put some bubbles in like 1527 01:11:34,040 --> 01:11:36,280 Speaker 4: boom or they put it in your hand so you 1528 01:11:36,320 --> 01:11:38,240 Speaker 4: can you can experiment with it. But it's like we 1529 01:11:38,360 --> 01:11:40,640 Speaker 4: see these things, and we want to interact. Where's the 1530 01:11:40,680 --> 01:11:44,040 Speaker 4: spaces where we can interact? So I think that's what 1531 01:11:44,240 --> 01:11:47,640 Speaker 4: makes us unique from other parties is like the performance 1532 01:11:47,680 --> 01:11:49,640 Speaker 4: aspect of it. I'm trying to bring this into like 1533 01:11:50,640 --> 01:11:53,000 Speaker 4: a potential festival, you know, get it bigger, make it 1534 01:11:53,080 --> 01:11:54,519 Speaker 4: have that festival vibe very. 1535 01:11:54,479 --> 01:11:57,920 Speaker 3: Much, festival vibes. This is a festival sex party. I 1536 01:11:57,960 --> 01:12:00,120 Speaker 3: can see that. Yeah, And it was fun and it 1537 01:12:00,200 --> 01:12:03,800 Speaker 3: was beautiful and aesthetically pleasing and everybody, you know, it 1538 01:12:03,920 --> 01:12:06,760 Speaker 3: was just with the vibes. I felt what you're trying 1539 01:12:06,800 --> 01:12:09,240 Speaker 3: to convey. It was very clear and the energy, and 1540 01:12:10,040 --> 01:12:15,120 Speaker 3: I appreciated the execution. I know how I'm sure how 1541 01:12:15,200 --> 01:12:18,800 Speaker 3: much refinement it took team effort, and so I could 1542 01:12:18,840 --> 01:12:22,719 Speaker 3: definitely appreciate all of the the ease that it was coming. 1543 01:12:22,800 --> 01:12:25,120 Speaker 3: As just a you know, a patron, it. 1544 01:12:25,520 --> 01:12:27,840 Speaker 4: Means the world for you to say that thank you 1545 01:12:28,000 --> 01:12:30,960 Speaker 4: for just visiting this space. Really poured my heart into it. 1546 01:12:31,600 --> 01:12:33,960 Speaker 4: And then also just as a woman of color, thank 1547 01:12:34,040 --> 01:12:37,920 Speaker 4: you for coming to my space. Absolutely we you know, 1548 01:12:38,000 --> 01:12:41,320 Speaker 4: being from Los Angeles, I wanted to create a space 1549 01:12:41,360 --> 01:12:43,879 Speaker 4: that felt like Los Angeles. A lot of these spaces 1550 01:12:44,000 --> 01:12:46,559 Speaker 4: like yes, they're white or everybody's just kind of playing 1551 01:12:46,600 --> 01:12:48,439 Speaker 4: with the race. It's like we've got the Latino party 1552 01:12:48,479 --> 01:12:50,280 Speaker 4: over here at the black party, you know, and then 1553 01:12:50,320 --> 01:12:52,240 Speaker 4: the rich white ones and all these other you know, 1554 01:12:52,320 --> 01:12:55,120 Speaker 4: there's a variety of them. But when I go to 1555 01:12:55,160 --> 01:12:58,160 Speaker 4: those parties, like this doesn't look like Los Angeles, right. 1556 01:12:58,240 --> 01:13:02,920 Speaker 4: Los Angeles has so much more activity and artistry in it. 1557 01:13:03,160 --> 01:13:05,720 Speaker 4: It's not just oh you look good and you you 1558 01:13:05,760 --> 01:13:09,479 Speaker 4: know you have this status like I love this city, 1559 01:13:10,080 --> 01:13:12,680 Speaker 4: you know, I love the city and the artist that 1560 01:13:12,760 --> 01:13:16,800 Speaker 4: it has in it. And you know, people came here 1561 01:13:16,920 --> 01:13:19,160 Speaker 4: to express themselves, people coming from all around the world 1562 01:13:19,240 --> 01:13:20,960 Speaker 4: to express themselves. So having a place like the play 1563 01:13:21,000 --> 01:13:23,400 Speaker 4: where it's like that side talent, maybe you act here, 1564 01:13:23,439 --> 01:13:25,920 Speaker 4: do a scene, you know, like go ahead, just not 1565 01:13:26,080 --> 01:13:28,840 Speaker 4: like not the thirty minute monologue. You know what I'm 1566 01:13:28,880 --> 01:13:33,400 Speaker 4: talking to. But point is is just you know, creating 1567 01:13:33,479 --> 01:13:38,519 Speaker 4: a space for freedom of expression and vulnerability and connection. 1568 01:13:39,200 --> 01:13:41,160 Speaker 4: That's that's what we're trying to we're trying to do. 1569 01:13:44,360 --> 01:13:44,760 Speaker 4: I love it. 1570 01:13:45,439 --> 01:13:47,040 Speaker 3: Do you have an affirmation for us today? 1571 01:13:47,080 --> 01:13:54,600 Speaker 4: Michael's washing the smokes. No with it's it's like with 1572 01:13:54,760 --> 01:14:04,760 Speaker 4: unconditional love. It's it's not anxiety, the presence of anxiety. 1573 01:14:06,000 --> 01:14:09,640 Speaker 4: Oh well, you know there was a really good one. 1574 01:14:11,560 --> 01:14:18,080 Speaker 4: Maybe okay, but I think just honestly, like a gratitude overall. Uh, 1575 01:14:18,720 --> 01:14:22,720 Speaker 4: it's been an amazing experience being able to host this, 1576 01:14:22,920 --> 01:14:24,519 Speaker 4: it's been a super challenging one. 1577 01:14:26,000 --> 01:14:28,599 Speaker 1: I think that's affirmation gratitude overall. 1578 01:14:29,080 --> 01:14:31,760 Speaker 4: Yeah, just I'm I'm able to do it, you know, 1579 01:14:32,080 --> 01:14:35,360 Speaker 4: and not too many people have that opportunity or going 1580 01:14:35,400 --> 01:14:38,439 Speaker 4: to get that shot if I am, I'm I'm going 1581 01:14:38,520 --> 01:14:41,000 Speaker 4: to do my best in this space though, to make 1582 01:14:41,040 --> 01:14:45,519 Speaker 4: it one that's like welcoming creative and finding ways for 1583 01:14:45,760 --> 01:14:50,960 Speaker 4: for everybody to to explore, you know, because we don't 1584 01:14:51,080 --> 01:14:52,880 Speaker 4: we don't just do the parties. We have workshops. We 1585 01:14:52,920 --> 01:14:55,440 Speaker 4: were just telling you all about the the scuirt. 1586 01:14:55,240 --> 01:15:01,320 Speaker 3: Shop, all right, that hurts shop. It's a squirt shop. 1587 01:15:01,360 --> 01:15:03,120 Speaker 3: I thought that was maybe an activation at the party 1588 01:15:03,479 --> 01:15:05,679 Speaker 3: that is going to I overheard a call that Michael 1589 01:15:05,800 --> 01:15:09,560 Speaker 3: was on saying they're gonna water color using squirt. 1590 01:15:09,800 --> 01:15:13,080 Speaker 4: We're gonna, yes, we're gonna. They're gonna be a score shop. 1591 01:15:13,200 --> 01:15:18,160 Speaker 4: Once you learn the techniques, uh and technique, Yeah, you 1592 01:15:18,360 --> 01:15:20,720 Speaker 4: learn all the different techniques to make yourself squirt. 1593 01:15:21,200 --> 01:15:23,320 Speaker 1: And then your first squirt ever you can use. 1594 01:15:25,880 --> 01:15:28,559 Speaker 4: You could take the water, you could take the squirts 1595 01:15:28,640 --> 01:15:32,400 Speaker 4: the squirt, yes exactly, you know, into a little cup, 1596 01:15:32,520 --> 01:15:35,000 Speaker 4: and then we're gonna allow people to do some water 1597 01:15:35,040 --> 01:15:36,640 Speaker 4: kind of paintings with it. So when you put it 1598 01:15:36,720 --> 01:15:38,280 Speaker 4: up at your house, we were like, what is that? Like? 1599 01:15:39,080 --> 01:15:39,799 Speaker 4: Funny story? 1600 01:15:40,160 --> 01:15:42,639 Speaker 3: Actually the Squirre class, what is there? 1601 01:15:42,720 --> 01:15:45,080 Speaker 1: Why am I so drawn to this success? 1602 01:15:45,800 --> 01:15:48,280 Speaker 3: Because decided aiming. 1603 01:15:48,120 --> 01:15:51,400 Speaker 4: How this this person did a performance one time. I've 1604 01:15:51,400 --> 01:15:52,760 Speaker 4: been trying to do this performance for a year, but 1605 01:15:52,840 --> 01:15:55,800 Speaker 4: you have to find the right person. And she is 1606 01:15:55,920 --> 01:15:58,559 Speaker 4: known as the Squirter, And so I think. 1607 01:15:58,439 --> 01:16:01,880 Speaker 1: Of the squirter. Do you guys remember the porns star cytherea. 1608 01:16:02,040 --> 01:16:06,840 Speaker 2: No no, she was I love I was, I loves 1609 01:16:06,880 --> 01:16:07,639 Speaker 2: fun fact. 1610 01:16:07,640 --> 01:16:11,080 Speaker 1: You love what squirre porn. It's like, I'm not. I 1611 01:16:11,240 --> 01:16:13,479 Speaker 1: kind of retired from it a while ago, but every 1612 01:16:13,560 --> 01:16:16,599 Speaker 1: now and then I got to run squirt. 1613 01:16:16,640 --> 01:16:18,440 Speaker 3: It's like you see yourself in the film. 1614 01:16:18,240 --> 01:16:18,800 Speaker 1: A little bit. 1615 01:16:18,880 --> 01:16:21,680 Speaker 2: But I just I see like the I think, I 1616 01:16:21,920 --> 01:16:25,479 Speaker 2: like how free everyone like you just like leave. You 1617 01:16:25,560 --> 01:16:29,120 Speaker 2: look like you've fully allowed yourself to leave, and so 1618 01:16:29,240 --> 01:16:34,160 Speaker 2: that turns me on. But anyway, she's known as. 1619 01:16:35,840 --> 01:16:37,599 Speaker 4: Look, I've seen I've seen some squirters in my day, 1620 01:16:37,640 --> 01:16:39,599 Speaker 4: but somebody was like kind of known as that person, 1621 01:16:39,640 --> 01:16:42,679 Speaker 4: and I was like, let's let's see. Uh So here's 1622 01:16:42,720 --> 01:16:46,880 Speaker 4: the idea. We would have watercolor paper with blots of 1623 01:16:47,000 --> 01:16:51,559 Speaker 4: water color on it, and then she would squirt onto 1624 01:16:51,600 --> 01:16:53,559 Speaker 4: the paper and there'd be a bunch of paint brushes 1625 01:16:53,640 --> 01:16:57,160 Speaker 4: around and then people from the crowd can just paint 1626 01:16:57,200 --> 01:17:00,720 Speaker 4: while she's squirting onto it. That was the idea, you know. 1627 01:17:00,840 --> 01:17:02,479 Speaker 4: And there's a lot of times I'm just writing these 1628 01:17:02,560 --> 01:17:04,519 Speaker 4: ideas down. This is my favorite part of it. 1629 01:17:06,960 --> 01:17:10,360 Speaker 1: See it. That's literally us. Every day we're like and said, 1630 01:17:10,400 --> 01:17:11,760 Speaker 1: we wrote it down and then we did it. 1631 01:17:12,479 --> 01:17:15,800 Speaker 4: So one day I was like, okay, hear me out. 1632 01:17:17,040 --> 01:17:20,679 Speaker 4: What if we used the squirre to then make this painting. 1633 01:17:20,760 --> 01:17:23,559 Speaker 4: Then everybody's painting it. It's this piece that we all 1634 01:17:23,720 --> 01:17:28,800 Speaker 4: created with pleasure. Like ah, so she ends up. You know, 1635 01:17:29,320 --> 01:17:31,000 Speaker 4: we've got the whole crowd. It's our biggest party of 1636 01:17:31,040 --> 01:17:33,559 Speaker 4: the year. Playground of the gods like this is the one, 1637 01:17:33,880 --> 01:17:38,360 Speaker 4: you know, the Catalina one god. Yeah, the playground of 1638 01:17:38,400 --> 01:17:39,680 Speaker 4: the gods, Like this is the one where I do, 1639 01:17:39,840 --> 01:17:42,479 Speaker 4: like all of my best ideas, we save them, you know, 1640 01:17:43,120 --> 01:17:45,439 Speaker 4: and this was this was the one. I was like, 1641 01:17:45,600 --> 01:17:53,120 Speaker 4: let's go. So we ended up having like three spots, 1642 01:17:53,280 --> 01:17:55,400 Speaker 4: you know, because I was like, hey, we don't like 1643 01:17:55,479 --> 01:17:58,120 Speaker 4: we got one person for sure, but like I love 1644 01:17:58,240 --> 01:17:59,640 Speaker 4: going to the crowd, Like you didn't know that you 1645 01:17:59,680 --> 01:18:00,479 Speaker 4: were going to perform? 1646 01:18:01,080 --> 01:18:02,960 Speaker 1: Are you a squirter? Is anyone a squirter in the house? 1647 01:18:04,760 --> 01:18:08,120 Speaker 4: Is anybody else want to square? And so there was 1648 01:18:08,360 --> 01:18:10,920 Speaker 4: one other persons was like I would you know, I'm like, yes, 1649 01:18:11,200 --> 01:18:15,960 Speaker 4: I told you. I was looking about you. Thank you, 1650 01:18:20,000 --> 01:18:22,679 Speaker 4: because you know, there's sometimes where we don't get the people, 1651 01:18:22,960 --> 01:18:24,880 Speaker 4: you know, so it's it's always interesting to see like 1652 01:18:24,920 --> 01:18:28,040 Speaker 4: where they bite or what you know, so they end 1653 01:18:28,120 --> 01:18:30,240 Speaker 4: up she you know, the person ended up coming up, 1654 01:18:31,880 --> 01:18:36,080 Speaker 4: but she was having like stays right, yes, stays right, 1655 01:18:36,120 --> 01:18:40,840 Speaker 4: and we get that doesn't matter. It's okay, thank you. Anyways, 1656 01:18:41,000 --> 01:18:45,519 Speaker 4: we appreciate your courage, you know. Now the squirre person 1657 01:18:45,640 --> 01:18:48,799 Speaker 4: like she just erupted to where it went over the table, 1658 01:18:49,400 --> 01:18:51,800 Speaker 4: you know, like it just directly the crowd. You know. 1659 01:18:52,160 --> 01:18:57,600 Speaker 4: It's just like I was been I mean, she just 1660 01:18:58,000 --> 01:18:59,720 Speaker 4: she it was just out there was like, oh my god, 1661 01:18:59,800 --> 01:19:01,920 Speaker 4: like I haven't I haven't seen this before. I didn't 1662 01:19:02,160 --> 01:19:04,280 Speaker 4: I have any preparation for this, Like, did y'all know what? 1663 01:19:04,680 --> 01:19:07,840 Speaker 4: I was like this too, so we should? It ends 1664 01:19:07,880 --> 01:19:09,920 Speaker 4: up like you know, it recedes and then it gets 1665 01:19:09,960 --> 01:19:13,120 Speaker 4: onto the paper and then like everybody rushes in and 1666 01:19:13,320 --> 01:19:17,080 Speaker 4: is doing it. And then she's like it's a whole scene. 1667 01:19:17,360 --> 01:19:19,880 Speaker 4: And then it got to what within her, like the 1668 01:19:20,080 --> 01:19:23,280 Speaker 4: person she was seeing at the time got involved, and 1669 01:19:23,360 --> 01:19:27,080 Speaker 4: I remember he just like puts his face up, gets 1670 01:19:27,200 --> 01:19:28,920 Speaker 4: like it's gets scored on his face, and then just 1671 01:19:29,040 --> 01:19:31,160 Speaker 4: rubs it across the painting. I was like, I was like, bro, 1672 01:19:31,280 --> 01:19:37,479 Speaker 4: we had a pretty good piece before, boyfriend. Yeah, like 1673 01:19:37,520 --> 01:19:39,920 Speaker 4: we had a bunch of these strokes that we had 1674 01:19:39,960 --> 01:19:43,760 Speaker 4: from It was just one of those times and we 1675 01:19:43,760 --> 01:19:49,800 Speaker 4: saw it was like, hey, was a freak's a moment. Okay, 1676 01:19:49,880 --> 01:19:52,760 Speaker 4: yeah exactly. They're clearly gonna do something later like we'll 1677 01:19:52,920 --> 01:19:54,479 Speaker 4: just give you all that picture. 1678 01:19:57,400 --> 01:20:00,320 Speaker 1: Yeah, well that takes the lesson there is that you 1679 01:20:00,400 --> 01:20:03,240 Speaker 1: need to easels ready to canvas. 1680 01:20:03,600 --> 01:20:06,120 Speaker 4: Oh yeah, all to say, it's like what we're gonna 1681 01:20:06,160 --> 01:20:08,800 Speaker 4: do now is we're gonna put you know, tarp down 1682 01:20:08,960 --> 01:20:12,479 Speaker 4: for just the whole squirt shop goggles. 1683 01:20:13,160 --> 01:20:15,200 Speaker 1: It's a whole stand in the back of your own risk. 1684 01:20:15,640 --> 01:20:22,559 Speaker 4: But yeah, that's July twentieth. I'm a cancer. Yeah, uh 1685 01:20:23,360 --> 01:20:25,920 Speaker 4: dragon signed for the Chinese New Year Shoutout China. 1686 01:20:32,360 --> 01:20:33,559 Speaker 3: I'm a dragon cancer too. 1687 01:20:34,000 --> 01:20:38,280 Speaker 4: Oh dope, Okay, specially it is the thing. It is 1688 01:20:38,320 --> 01:20:38,559 Speaker 4: a thing. 1689 01:20:38,720 --> 01:20:39,240 Speaker 1: You look at that. 1690 01:20:40,320 --> 01:20:43,519 Speaker 4: But there was a crazy you guys are asking for 1691 01:20:43,560 --> 01:20:44,280 Speaker 4: a crazy story. 1692 01:20:44,800 --> 01:20:47,320 Speaker 3: Yes, I got so caught up in the water colors. 1693 01:20:47,400 --> 01:20:49,519 Speaker 1: Yes, ther that wasn't the Horry. Yeah. 1694 01:20:50,439 --> 01:20:52,080 Speaker 4: So I had such trouble with this question when you 1695 01:20:52,080 --> 01:20:54,519 Speaker 4: send it, I was like, what does like what do 1696 01:20:54,560 --> 01:20:56,360 Speaker 4: you mean my horri Like what is my I'm jaded. 1697 01:20:56,439 --> 01:20:59,200 Speaker 1: I heard you in there like asking your wife like babe, 1698 01:20:59,680 --> 01:21:00,719 Speaker 1: what is there a story? 1699 01:21:02,960 --> 01:21:05,559 Speaker 4: Yeah? Yeah, like maybe maybe you're seeing my blind spot here, 1700 01:21:05,720 --> 01:21:07,960 Speaker 4: Like I don't let you know. Uh. So I had 1701 01:21:08,040 --> 01:21:10,479 Speaker 4: I called my ex girlfriend. I called my wife and 1702 01:21:10,520 --> 01:21:13,200 Speaker 4: I was like, yo, is there was there something like 1703 01:21:13,240 --> 01:21:15,599 Speaker 4: a time where I was just Horry Horry and they 1704 01:21:15,640 --> 01:21:19,320 Speaker 4: were there was one time where it was just like 1705 01:21:19,400 --> 01:21:22,320 Speaker 4: a time period where they were both like out of 1706 01:21:22,439 --> 01:21:26,840 Speaker 4: the country, you know, they're both like traveling, and I was, uh, 1707 01:21:27,560 --> 01:21:30,960 Speaker 4: I have my phone on me at the time, I 1708 01:21:31,080 --> 01:21:34,040 Speaker 4: had my my wife and then my my girlfriend at 1709 01:21:34,080 --> 01:21:34,320 Speaker 4: the time. 1710 01:21:34,400 --> 01:21:37,400 Speaker 1: Okay, you guys were together relationship. 1711 01:21:36,960 --> 01:21:40,120 Speaker 4: Yes, you were. It was you know, it's a it 1712 01:21:40,320 --> 01:21:44,360 Speaker 4: was not a triad. It was like me and the 1713 01:21:44,720 --> 01:21:46,880 Speaker 4: girlfriend and me and my wife, and then they're just 1714 01:21:46,960 --> 01:21:49,880 Speaker 4: happened to be best friends, which is like, it's a 1715 01:21:49,920 --> 01:21:50,519 Speaker 4: gift and a curse. 1716 01:21:52,200 --> 01:21:53,640 Speaker 1: Were you guys together or. 1717 01:21:54,120 --> 01:21:56,880 Speaker 4: No, no, separate. It was separate, but they were friends, 1718 01:21:57,200 --> 01:22:00,439 Speaker 4: you know, and like you it's it's a gift and 1719 01:22:00,479 --> 01:22:02,639 Speaker 4: a curse. Like it's great, like I'm happy that everybody 1720 01:22:03,000 --> 01:22:03,680 Speaker 4: is having a good time. 1721 01:22:03,800 --> 01:22:05,760 Speaker 1: Feel left out, not left out, but like everyone's talking 1722 01:22:05,800 --> 01:22:06,080 Speaker 1: about you. 1723 01:22:07,240 --> 01:22:09,360 Speaker 4: It's just when it comes to like, you know, telling 1724 01:22:09,439 --> 01:22:11,760 Speaker 4: me about myself, having two people tell me about myself 1725 01:22:11,800 --> 01:22:13,720 Speaker 4: and they're. 1726 01:22:12,880 --> 01:22:14,360 Speaker 1: Conspiring and they're being like, doesn't he do that? 1727 01:22:14,520 --> 01:22:17,599 Speaker 3: And your wife she's still your girlfriend. 1728 01:22:17,800 --> 01:22:20,040 Speaker 4: No, no, no, we broke up like a year ago. 1729 01:22:21,160 --> 01:22:24,600 Speaker 4: She's with another partner, moveing to a besa you know, 1730 01:22:25,000 --> 01:22:28,040 Speaker 4: very very happy for that's awesome. 1731 01:22:28,720 --> 01:22:30,439 Speaker 1: So do they have them did they give you any 1732 01:22:30,479 --> 01:22:33,160 Speaker 1: ideas you and this is what was happening you. 1733 01:22:33,200 --> 01:22:35,439 Speaker 4: Guys, and they were like they were like when you're 1734 01:22:35,479 --> 01:22:37,800 Speaker 4: actually like a whore. Was when you know, we went 1735 01:22:37,840 --> 01:22:39,439 Speaker 4: out of town. You had like a date every day 1736 01:22:39,800 --> 01:22:43,160 Speaker 4: until we got back, and I was like, well everyone relaxed, 1737 01:22:43,200 --> 01:22:45,560 Speaker 4: hear me out. You know, like dealing with both of 1738 01:22:45,640 --> 01:22:48,639 Speaker 4: y'all all the time can be a you know, point 1739 01:22:48,800 --> 01:22:53,080 Speaker 4: is it's it's difficult. There's not like, oh man, if 1740 01:22:53,160 --> 01:22:55,320 Speaker 4: you were in a one on one relationship or a 1741 01:22:55,360 --> 01:22:57,840 Speaker 4: two one run relationship, like it gets easier. Like they 1742 01:22:57,920 --> 01:23:02,479 Speaker 4: all have their difficulties here. But I think there there's 1743 01:23:02,520 --> 01:23:04,920 Speaker 4: been birthdays that have been kind of crazy. 1744 01:23:06,360 --> 01:23:07,760 Speaker 1: About. Tell me about one. 1745 01:23:08,400 --> 01:23:12,960 Speaker 4: There was one in Seattle. Sleepless in Seattle, we call 1746 01:23:13,000 --> 01:23:16,280 Speaker 4: it sleepless. Well, you know, what. 1747 01:23:19,479 --> 01:23:22,600 Speaker 1: The fuck are you doing? Give me the deep it was. 1748 01:23:22,800 --> 01:23:26,360 Speaker 4: It was my uh girlfriend and my wife at the 1749 01:23:26,400 --> 01:23:29,639 Speaker 4: time went up to visit a friend and his partner 1750 01:23:30,280 --> 01:23:33,000 Speaker 4: and just had a time. 1751 01:23:33,600 --> 01:23:36,560 Speaker 2: Wait you guys, you went as well, yes, okay, you 1752 01:23:36,640 --> 01:23:38,080 Speaker 2: and your girlfriend and your wife went up. 1753 01:23:37,960 --> 01:23:40,960 Speaker 4: To go visit the friend and his partner and his 1754 01:23:41,080 --> 01:23:44,920 Speaker 4: partner who were also in the community in Seattle. So 1755 01:23:44,960 --> 01:23:46,720 Speaker 4: we're like, let us show you the Seattle scene and 1756 01:23:46,880 --> 01:23:49,080 Speaker 4: like the whole thing. So it was just a really 1757 01:23:49,160 --> 01:23:51,960 Speaker 4: fun you know weekend, So you have a good four 1758 01:23:52,960 --> 01:23:57,400 Speaker 4: quadruples five if we all play, if if we played, 1759 01:23:57,479 --> 01:23:59,920 Speaker 4: you know, I don't know what happened in Seattle. 1760 01:24:01,080 --> 01:24:04,639 Speaker 1: I think I want to say this is a horror story. 1761 01:24:04,720 --> 01:24:05,640 Speaker 1: It's a very vague one. 1762 01:24:06,280 --> 01:24:08,200 Speaker 4: It was just so wildly. 1763 01:24:08,880 --> 01:24:10,679 Speaker 1: They just got wild and so wild. 1764 01:24:11,200 --> 01:24:12,800 Speaker 4: I don't know how much you're allowed. 1765 01:24:12,560 --> 01:24:16,040 Speaker 1: To say for everything. That's the whole point. Good Month's 1766 01:24:16,040 --> 01:24:16,599 Speaker 1: bat Choices. 1767 01:24:18,240 --> 01:24:20,559 Speaker 3: Come on, come on, come on, blood, sex and magic. 1768 01:24:20,600 --> 01:24:22,640 Speaker 1: Come on. You see my tits are hanging. You know, 1769 01:24:23,640 --> 01:24:24,639 Speaker 1: I went to your sex part. 1770 01:24:26,280 --> 01:24:29,599 Speaker 4: Okay, so we got so okay, So this is uh, 1771 01:24:29,920 --> 01:24:32,200 Speaker 4: you know, this is one of my brothers, like he 1772 01:24:32,439 --> 01:24:35,840 Speaker 4: he shares my birthday, so you know, it's like already. 1773 01:24:37,000 --> 01:24:38,880 Speaker 3: You know, so cancer is a little quirker. 1774 01:24:39,240 --> 01:24:41,519 Speaker 4: And so we just went up and it was it 1775 01:24:41,640 --> 01:24:43,439 Speaker 4: was just a whole vibe. Like as soon as we 1776 01:24:43,520 --> 01:24:47,800 Speaker 4: got there, we did the They have like these jacuzzie 1777 01:24:47,800 --> 01:24:50,080 Speaker 4: boats out there. I've always wanted to do a jacuzie boat. 1778 01:24:50,120 --> 01:24:51,920 Speaker 1: And you go in the boat and there's the boat 1779 01:24:52,040 --> 01:24:53,519 Speaker 1: is just a jacuzzi. 1780 01:24:53,240 --> 01:24:56,080 Speaker 4: Exactly like the boat is just there's no boat. It's 1781 01:24:56,120 --> 01:24:58,800 Speaker 4: jacuzzie that you're driving. You're driving a Jacuzzie on the 1782 01:24:58,880 --> 01:25:00,200 Speaker 4: lake exactly all this. 1783 01:25:00,280 --> 01:25:01,479 Speaker 1: I was like, we're getting one. 1784 01:25:01,640 --> 01:25:03,439 Speaker 4: Well, we're doing it right away. 1785 01:25:03,640 --> 01:25:08,240 Speaker 1: We're going to Seattle, specifically in Seattle. Everyone always I. 1786 01:25:08,280 --> 01:25:10,040 Speaker 4: Was like, wait, there's other coastal places that I've been 1787 01:25:10,040 --> 01:25:12,519 Speaker 4: to and like Jacuzzi boat time, look for it. 1788 01:25:12,760 --> 01:25:13,080 Speaker 1: I don't know. 1789 01:25:13,160 --> 01:25:15,000 Speaker 4: I mean, it's just the water's got to be colder, 1790 01:25:15,080 --> 01:25:17,400 Speaker 4: so you know, the Pacific. You know, we're in Los Angeles, 1791 01:25:17,439 --> 01:25:18,640 Speaker 4: they need it. You can't get in that with a 1792 01:25:18,720 --> 01:25:21,439 Speaker 4: lot of a Jacuzzie boat out of the marina business 1793 01:25:21,520 --> 01:25:22,639 Speaker 4: out of marina, tell right. 1794 01:25:24,240 --> 01:25:29,200 Speaker 1: Go on Facebook marketplace, build a boat around it, one 1795 01:25:29,240 --> 01:25:29,599 Speaker 1: for a whole. 1796 01:25:29,640 --> 01:25:31,560 Speaker 4: Jaz the guy like saw us and he was like, 1797 01:25:31,600 --> 01:25:33,800 Speaker 4: all right, guys, no partying on the boats. And we 1798 01:25:33,960 --> 01:25:36,920 Speaker 4: just look back, like, bro, we are about to sure 1799 01:25:37,320 --> 01:25:38,160 Speaker 4: have to come get us. 1800 01:25:40,360 --> 01:25:42,560 Speaker 3: In the ocean along the lake in a boat in 1801 01:25:42,600 --> 01:25:43,160 Speaker 3: the jacuzzi. 1802 01:25:43,479 --> 01:25:45,880 Speaker 4: The Jacuzi Jacuzzi boat experience was wild. 1803 01:25:46,760 --> 01:25:48,200 Speaker 1: Wow. It must have been like a movie. I could 1804 01:25:48,200 --> 01:25:50,560 Speaker 1: see it right like an orgy, that Jacuzi. 1805 01:25:50,240 --> 01:25:54,080 Speaker 4: Boat, depending on what you define orgy. But you know 1806 01:25:54,200 --> 01:25:56,800 Speaker 4: it was that we are we we played and say 1807 01:25:56,880 --> 01:25:59,040 Speaker 4: that you know, I just I don't want to get 1808 01:25:59,040 --> 01:26:02,679 Speaker 4: into the SPI. I respect it, you know, but I'll 1809 01:26:02,760 --> 01:26:05,640 Speaker 4: say that whole weekend was just like these different situations. 1810 01:26:05,720 --> 01:26:06,600 Speaker 4: Now we're like in the I. 1811 01:26:06,600 --> 01:26:10,600 Speaker 2: Would imagine that your personal sex life is quite cinematic 1812 01:26:11,000 --> 01:26:12,640 Speaker 2: if this is what you do for a living, and 1813 01:26:12,840 --> 01:26:17,360 Speaker 2: like you enjoy creating experiences and you care about the aesthetic, 1814 01:26:17,400 --> 01:26:19,559 Speaker 2: because we also are some aesthetic bitches as well. 1815 01:26:19,920 --> 01:26:22,040 Speaker 3: That's why I appreciated the party. I was like, you know, 1816 01:26:22,240 --> 01:26:24,600 Speaker 3: if I I I if I was gonna do it, 1817 01:26:24,760 --> 01:26:26,280 Speaker 3: like this is how you do it big. It's like 1818 01:26:26,280 --> 01:26:29,120 Speaker 3: a Hollywood sex party. I felt like it was very beautiful. 1819 01:26:31,320 --> 01:26:33,960 Speaker 4: I will say it's like it's one of the Yes, 1820 01:26:34,040 --> 01:26:38,640 Speaker 4: there's some cinematic moments, and what I've learned like the 1821 01:26:38,800 --> 01:26:41,639 Speaker 4: less you say about it, the more likely to happen, 1822 01:26:42,560 --> 01:26:46,240 Speaker 4: you know, like overall, but there's just been some some 1823 01:26:46,439 --> 01:26:48,400 Speaker 4: some crazy moments. And I think the other thing is 1824 01:26:48,560 --> 01:26:51,680 Speaker 4: like what I've learned over time in this space is like, 1825 01:26:51,760 --> 01:26:55,639 Speaker 4: you know, telling my friends about these crazy experiences. It's 1826 01:26:55,640 --> 01:26:57,040 Speaker 4: like they're just they're happening. It's like I got to 1827 01:26:57,040 --> 01:26:59,400 Speaker 4: tell somebody, like you know, and you kind of go 1828 01:26:59,439 --> 01:27:02,639 Speaker 4: to somebody, but eventually it can. It can breed resentment 1829 01:27:02,720 --> 01:27:04,840 Speaker 4: and jealousy. Maybe they're not at that place in their 1830 01:27:04,880 --> 01:27:08,920 Speaker 4: life yet. And that's not my purpose. My purpose is like, man, 1831 01:27:08,920 --> 01:27:10,519 Speaker 4: I wish you could have been there, you know, not 1832 01:27:10,720 --> 01:27:12,479 Speaker 4: like I can do this and you can't. You know. 1833 01:27:12,680 --> 01:27:15,560 Speaker 4: So when it comes to telling stories and stuff, I 1834 01:27:15,680 --> 01:27:18,400 Speaker 4: try to just not brag. 1835 01:27:18,360 --> 01:27:22,400 Speaker 1: About your sex and everybody lot. 1836 01:27:22,479 --> 01:27:26,439 Speaker 3: Most people are having togger. So I'm just having so 1837 01:27:26,560 --> 01:27:29,360 Speaker 3: much great, amazing creative sex over here, like I already 1838 01:27:29,400 --> 01:27:32,160 Speaker 3: told yours, I already want. 1839 01:27:33,479 --> 01:27:35,320 Speaker 1: This is not this is Some people are really good 1840 01:27:35,360 --> 01:27:36,960 Speaker 1: with their vanilla. I'm not vanilla me. 1841 01:27:37,080 --> 01:27:39,480 Speaker 3: Just some people do just like regular missionary. 1842 01:27:40,680 --> 01:27:41,040 Speaker 4: I like it. 1843 01:27:41,080 --> 01:27:44,200 Speaker 1: I mean I like it like that too. Yeah, I'm 1844 01:27:44,200 --> 01:27:45,240 Speaker 1: saying like I think that there's. 1845 01:27:45,240 --> 01:27:48,760 Speaker 4: Yeah, balan, everybody has their own flavor. Take your time, 1846 01:27:49,200 --> 01:27:51,400 Speaker 4: you know. All I'll say is like, at least go 1847 01:27:51,560 --> 01:27:53,640 Speaker 4: check it out, though, Yeah, you know it's like just 1848 01:27:53,800 --> 01:27:55,280 Speaker 4: you go. You know, you go to Broadway, you go 1849 01:27:55,360 --> 01:27:57,720 Speaker 4: to like different types of shows, you go to festivals, like, 1850 01:27:58,479 --> 01:27:59,680 Speaker 4: at least check it out. You can go to a 1851 01:27:59,680 --> 01:28:01,920 Speaker 4: sex or even still respect your boundaries and not play 1852 01:28:02,040 --> 01:28:04,280 Speaker 4: with anybody there. But you could see something sexy and 1853 01:28:04,360 --> 01:28:08,160 Speaker 4: fun and adult, and it may it may spark a 1854 01:28:08,200 --> 01:28:10,040 Speaker 4: lot of couples. Who will they say, we're only going 1855 01:28:10,080 --> 01:28:11,960 Speaker 4: to play with each other. That's our boundary. So a 1856 01:28:12,040 --> 01:28:13,800 Speaker 4: lot of couples go in like that and then they 1857 01:28:13,920 --> 01:28:15,720 Speaker 4: just get to see like, oh wow, like I didn't 1858 01:28:15,720 --> 01:28:18,479 Speaker 4: even know that was the thing, you know, like, oh, 1859 01:28:18,600 --> 01:28:20,360 Speaker 4: that's what that looks like when it's played out in 1860 01:28:20,439 --> 01:28:23,759 Speaker 4: front of my face. Right, here's some toys and tools 1861 01:28:23,800 --> 01:28:27,160 Speaker 4: that I never even knew existed. Like, so when you 1862 01:28:27,240 --> 01:28:29,719 Speaker 4: put yourself in those spaces, you just are learning more 1863 01:28:31,640 --> 01:28:34,760 Speaker 4: in in the sex space, you know something. Just don't 1864 01:28:34,760 --> 01:28:35,400 Speaker 4: limit yourself. 1865 01:28:35,520 --> 01:28:38,800 Speaker 2: Your people explore their music tastes, their food tastes, like 1866 01:28:38,880 --> 01:28:41,080 Speaker 2: all these different tastes that we have boundaries around certain things. 1867 01:28:41,120 --> 01:28:43,680 Speaker 2: And granted it's you explore it. If it's not for you, 1868 01:28:43,840 --> 01:28:45,800 Speaker 2: it's not for you. But the point is is like 1869 01:28:45,920 --> 01:28:48,920 Speaker 2: staying open and specifically in sex, is that there's so 1870 01:28:49,000 --> 01:28:51,280 Speaker 2: much shame, so really evaluating. 1871 01:28:50,920 --> 01:28:55,040 Speaker 4: Why it is that you feel so uncomfortable with this this, Oh, 1872 01:28:55,240 --> 01:28:59,560 Speaker 4: I got my affirmation. The presence of shame is the 1873 01:28:59,600 --> 01:29:01,720 Speaker 4: apps sense of unconditional love. 1874 01:29:02,280 --> 01:29:06,519 Speaker 3: The presence of shame is the absence of unconditional love. 1875 01:29:07,080 --> 01:29:08,320 Speaker 3: I told you to come back to you. 1876 01:29:09,760 --> 01:29:12,640 Speaker 4: There it goes. The last thing I want to talk 1877 01:29:12,640 --> 01:29:14,880 Speaker 4: to you guys about, because I think it's important for 1878 01:29:14,960 --> 01:29:16,840 Speaker 4: people to talk about. And it's a word that not 1879 01:29:16,920 --> 01:29:23,439 Speaker 4: everybody understands. Compersion. Compersion, Yes, compersion is being able to 1880 01:29:23,560 --> 01:29:30,280 Speaker 4: experience joy for some experiencing joy, and that is compersion. 1881 01:29:31,280 --> 01:29:36,920 Speaker 1: Can't you hear that I have and I have compersion, 1882 01:29:40,280 --> 01:29:41,680 Speaker 1: but being able, you know. 1883 01:29:41,960 --> 01:29:43,840 Speaker 4: And I try to explain to people like if you 1884 01:29:44,760 --> 01:29:45,880 Speaker 4: have children. 1885 01:29:45,920 --> 01:29:48,519 Speaker 1: And that compersion doesn't relate to sex, okay exactly. 1886 01:29:48,640 --> 01:29:51,000 Speaker 4: So you have children and they're out there on the 1887 01:29:51,000 --> 01:29:55,040 Speaker 4: swing set, you know, they're on the playground, experiences happy, 1888 01:29:55,080 --> 01:29:58,000 Speaker 4: I'm perfect, you know, great, you know, But then when 1889 01:29:58,080 --> 01:30:02,760 Speaker 4: it comes to that same unconditional love for a partner, right, 1890 01:30:02,840 --> 01:30:05,800 Speaker 4: it's like, oh no, only it's limited to this person. 1891 01:30:06,920 --> 01:30:09,680 Speaker 4: Can expand for my children, you know, so deeply and 1892 01:30:09,680 --> 01:30:11,840 Speaker 4: in immense, and but for my part it's it can 1893 01:30:11,880 --> 01:30:14,280 Speaker 4: only be for one person. So I think it's just 1894 01:30:15,280 --> 01:30:19,920 Speaker 4: when it comes to compersion, really practicing that that's at 1895 01:30:19,960 --> 01:30:23,479 Speaker 4: the core of this whole thing. It's just whether I'm 1896 01:30:23,520 --> 01:30:27,920 Speaker 4: bringing my my wife's joy or someone else is giving 1897 01:30:27,960 --> 01:30:30,400 Speaker 4: her joy. The fact that my wife is experiencing joy, 1898 01:30:30,479 --> 01:30:32,560 Speaker 4: I love her so unconditionally that like, I'm just so 1899 01:30:32,640 --> 01:30:35,640 Speaker 4: happy that you're happy. Like this existence is hard, and 1900 01:30:35,800 --> 01:30:38,920 Speaker 4: just if whoever's making you smile, like that's that's what 1901 01:30:39,000 --> 01:30:44,600 Speaker 4: I'm here for. Do you guys have like rules or 1902 01:30:44,640 --> 01:30:47,120 Speaker 4: you kind of just absolutely absolutely? I mean when we 1903 01:30:47,160 --> 01:30:49,920 Speaker 4: started off, there's like we just we had the Nine Commandments, 1904 01:30:50,400 --> 01:30:53,519 Speaker 4: you know, that's where we started off. How even tie 1905 01:30:53,560 --> 01:30:57,080 Speaker 4: that to religion? Like, but we just had our nine 1906 01:30:57,200 --> 01:31:00,280 Speaker 4: commandments of like okay, like here the main thing that 1907 01:31:00,439 --> 01:31:02,519 Speaker 4: we at that time, here is where our boundaries started. 1908 01:31:02,600 --> 01:31:05,479 Speaker 4: So you know, no sleeping over, you know, like there's 1909 01:31:05,920 --> 01:31:07,760 Speaker 4: this is the curfew if you were to do this, 1910 01:31:08,000 --> 01:31:10,479 Speaker 4: like right now, we only play in the same room. 1911 01:31:11,120 --> 01:31:13,120 Speaker 4: You know, right now we're only playing with each other. 1912 01:31:13,160 --> 01:31:14,800 Speaker 4: At one point, there was just we're just playing with 1913 01:31:14,880 --> 01:31:19,040 Speaker 4: each other, and maybe if we both give each other 1914 01:31:19,080 --> 01:31:20,960 Speaker 4: a green light for somebody else then has to still 1915 01:31:21,000 --> 01:31:23,080 Speaker 4: be in the same room, you know. So like there's 1916 01:31:23,120 --> 01:31:26,080 Speaker 4: little things as we and then no matter what in 1917 01:31:26,160 --> 01:31:28,880 Speaker 4: this space, your boundaries evolve. That's the one thing that 1918 01:31:29,120 --> 01:31:31,400 Speaker 4: first off, that's the one thing that's constant has changed, 1919 01:31:31,600 --> 01:31:35,040 Speaker 4: you know, just like your sexuality. But all to say 1920 01:31:35,160 --> 01:31:38,240 Speaker 4: is like you start some things that bothered you at 1921 01:31:38,280 --> 01:31:39,400 Speaker 4: once don't bother you anymore. 1922 01:31:40,280 --> 01:31:40,760 Speaker 1: Did you say that? 1923 01:31:40,880 --> 01:31:40,960 Speaker 4: Ye? 1924 01:31:44,000 --> 01:31:45,880 Speaker 1: Yeah, I just like I started crawling down as he 1925 01:31:45,960 --> 01:31:47,360 Speaker 1: was talking. I was like, am I high? 1926 01:31:47,520 --> 01:31:48,320 Speaker 4: Or is that a spine? 1927 01:31:51,880 --> 01:31:54,680 Speaker 2: Would you say that in your journey that you've had 1928 01:31:54,720 --> 01:31:57,920 Speaker 2: a you've had to you said, you get, you evolve 1929 01:31:57,960 --> 01:32:01,759 Speaker 2: in your boundaries. How has the journey been with your partner, 1930 01:32:01,960 --> 01:32:05,560 Speaker 2: like as far as communication, because yeah, because we've we 1931 01:32:05,680 --> 01:32:07,680 Speaker 2: had Actually shout out to Kenya. 1932 01:32:08,120 --> 01:32:13,040 Speaker 1: Smith, Stevens Stevens and Stevens Stevens. Yeah, shout out to 1933 01:32:13,120 --> 01:32:13,879 Speaker 1: Kenya Stevens. 1934 01:32:14,680 --> 01:32:18,240 Speaker 2: She she's pollyamorous. She's been very open about her relationship. 1935 01:32:18,280 --> 01:32:19,679 Speaker 2: For that, I think she was like the first black 1936 01:32:20,240 --> 01:32:22,760 Speaker 2: couple that ever came out like thirty years ago. They 1937 01:32:22,760 --> 01:32:25,519 Speaker 2: didn't come out thirty years ago, but they came out many, many. 1938 01:32:25,439 --> 01:32:25,960 Speaker 1: Many years ago. 1939 01:32:26,040 --> 01:32:29,320 Speaker 2: She has a very beautiful community, pollyamorous coach, and she 1940 01:32:29,520 --> 01:32:32,280 Speaker 2: was she has four husbands and she has multiple boyfriends 1941 01:32:32,840 --> 01:32:36,560 Speaker 2: and she's pollio g like she's out here, been doing this. 1942 01:32:38,200 --> 01:32:46,400 Speaker 1: I'm Polly Pocky, Polly baby Polly, But I don't think. 1943 01:32:46,439 --> 01:32:48,280 Speaker 1: I think people just think that you step into this 1944 01:32:49,479 --> 01:32:51,880 Speaker 1: agreement or this lifestyle or whatever you want to call it, 1945 01:32:52,080 --> 01:32:54,200 Speaker 1: and you're just automatically an expert at it because you 1946 01:32:54,280 --> 01:32:56,880 Speaker 1: both have compersian and like I like to see people, 1947 01:32:56,880 --> 01:32:58,360 Speaker 1: I like to see you have joy. I see you 1948 01:32:58,360 --> 01:32:58,840 Speaker 1: have joy too. 1949 01:32:59,120 --> 01:33:01,280 Speaker 2: Okay, there's never going to be any time in which 1950 01:33:02,080 --> 01:33:04,400 Speaker 2: your joy feels like a threat to me or like 1951 01:33:04,479 --> 01:33:07,120 Speaker 2: at any point and whatever. Just working through not even 1952 01:33:07,160 --> 01:33:09,519 Speaker 2: a threat, but just working through those those feelings. 1953 01:33:09,920 --> 01:33:11,560 Speaker 4: You you're hitting it on that. I mean, this is 1954 01:33:13,320 --> 01:33:16,639 Speaker 4: I can understand the concept of compersion and still feel jealous, 1955 01:33:17,840 --> 01:33:20,400 Speaker 4: you know, and so you just work with yourself and 1956 01:33:21,200 --> 01:33:24,400 Speaker 4: being able to identify I'm feeling jealous right now, Okay, 1957 01:33:24,439 --> 01:33:27,320 Speaker 4: like what is actually making me jealous? You know what? 1958 01:33:27,640 --> 01:33:33,360 Speaker 4: What is what's coming up for me? You know? Underneath Yeah, 1959 01:33:33,439 --> 01:33:35,559 Speaker 4: underneath that jealousy, what's the insecurity that I really need 1960 01:33:35,640 --> 01:33:37,560 Speaker 4: to face, we really need to talk through. And I 1961 01:33:37,600 --> 01:33:39,960 Speaker 4: think that's what I love about, you know, the couples 1962 01:33:40,040 --> 01:33:42,840 Speaker 4: and just the individuals and the lifestyle in general. They're 1963 01:33:42,960 --> 01:33:47,800 Speaker 4: just so much more open for deeper conversation about like 1964 01:33:50,280 --> 01:33:52,120 Speaker 4: not just sexuality. But I think just like a lot of. 1965 01:33:52,120 --> 01:33:54,559 Speaker 2: Fluid, I mean where they're at moment by moment, Yeah, 1966 01:33:54,800 --> 01:33:56,840 Speaker 2: as it changes, you know, And I think that that's 1967 01:33:57,000 --> 01:33:59,840 Speaker 2: often like our insecurity is that we're supposed to be 1968 01:34:00,160 --> 01:34:02,479 Speaker 2: completely one way all the time or else like we're 1969 01:34:02,560 --> 01:34:05,519 Speaker 2: unstable or or there's like they're insecure. 1970 01:34:05,560 --> 01:34:07,360 Speaker 1: But I think it's natural for things to come up 1971 01:34:07,520 --> 01:34:11,000 Speaker 1: and for you to face things and and that's okay. 1972 01:34:11,200 --> 01:34:13,719 Speaker 4: Yeah. And when we first started, like there'd be plenty 1973 01:34:13,800 --> 01:34:16,320 Speaker 4: times where, you know, when my partner hooked up with 1974 01:34:16,360 --> 01:34:18,280 Speaker 4: somebody else for the first time, you know, I was like, 1975 01:34:18,560 --> 01:34:20,360 Speaker 4: it took me like six months to get over that. 1976 01:34:21,120 --> 01:34:22,680 Speaker 4: I remember three months and I was like, I'm over it. 1977 01:34:22,720 --> 01:34:24,439 Speaker 4: And then like when I look back, like a year, 1978 01:34:24,439 --> 01:34:26,120 Speaker 4: I was like, damn, it took me like six months. Really, 1979 01:34:27,240 --> 01:34:28,640 Speaker 4: Like you hear a sound like this. 1980 01:34:28,680 --> 01:34:34,760 Speaker 1: She hasn't made that sound with me, Hey, nigga, but 1981 01:34:35,120 --> 01:34:35,680 Speaker 1: how did you make that? 1982 01:34:35,800 --> 01:34:36,599 Speaker 3: May make that sound? 1983 01:34:36,720 --> 01:34:42,679 Speaker 4: There? Done, That's definitely a story there. And and there's 1984 01:34:42,720 --> 01:34:46,880 Speaker 4: been times where you know, I think like when let's 1985 01:34:46,920 --> 01:34:52,200 Speaker 4: say someone makes your partner squirt. I've seen this before, right, 1986 01:34:52,479 --> 01:34:54,320 Speaker 4: your partner squirts, and it's like, oh, my god, I 1987 01:34:54,479 --> 01:34:58,880 Speaker 4: wasn't the one that made the squirt. Oh my, like, ah, 1988 01:34:59,080 --> 01:35:00,840 Speaker 4: somebody else did it, you know. And but what I've 1989 01:35:00,880 --> 01:35:03,720 Speaker 4: also seen is, you know, the person that made them 1990 01:35:03,720 --> 01:35:07,080 Speaker 4: score be like, hey, let me show you, right, And 1991 01:35:07,240 --> 01:35:11,360 Speaker 4: then when that person does squirt with their partner and 1992 01:35:11,479 --> 01:35:15,720 Speaker 4: they also have that connection, that deeper connection, it's way 1993 01:35:15,840 --> 01:35:18,360 Speaker 4: more and it's a lot louder, and it's a whole 1994 01:35:18,520 --> 01:35:20,479 Speaker 4: you know, and then they get to now that they 1995 01:35:20,600 --> 01:35:22,720 Speaker 4: know that trick. Now you guys are doing this on 1996 01:35:22,800 --> 01:35:23,320 Speaker 4: your own time. 1997 01:35:23,600 --> 01:35:26,679 Speaker 1: Now you've got enough gifts gift. 1998 01:35:26,840 --> 01:35:29,599 Speaker 4: Yeah, And there's so and that's the beauty of the spaces, 1999 01:35:29,680 --> 01:35:31,479 Speaker 4: like you just keep exploring, you know. It's like I'm 2000 01:35:31,760 --> 01:35:32,960 Speaker 4: I'm gonna just try this, Like I don't know if 2001 01:35:32,960 --> 01:35:34,760 Speaker 4: I like it or not. I remember the first time 2002 01:35:35,439 --> 01:35:38,439 Speaker 4: somebody flogged me, you know, and they flogged me. I 2003 01:35:38,560 --> 01:35:46,920 Speaker 4: was like, nope, Okay, there's there's other you know, there's 2004 01:35:46,920 --> 01:35:48,120 Speaker 4: other people that like it, you know, and there's some 2005 01:35:48,560 --> 01:35:50,240 Speaker 4: you know, black people who I've seen who like it. 2006 01:35:50,320 --> 01:35:53,559 Speaker 4: But it's like that's a whole nother trauma relay, right exactly. 2007 01:35:53,640 --> 01:35:59,240 Speaker 4: There is there's that, but it is it's just being 2008 01:35:59,360 --> 01:36:03,280 Speaker 4: open you know, at the end of it. And then 2009 01:36:03,360 --> 01:36:09,280 Speaker 4: the ethical honesty, Yeah, the honesty honestly, which is also 2010 01:36:09,360 --> 01:36:10,439 Speaker 4: means being honest with yourself. 2011 01:36:10,720 --> 01:36:13,679 Speaker 2: So my last question, because we talked this all started 2012 01:36:13,760 --> 01:36:16,800 Speaker 2: with us asking you about your journey and you saying 2013 01:36:16,840 --> 01:36:19,720 Speaker 2: that it started with not being honest. How even after 2014 01:36:19,840 --> 01:36:22,280 Speaker 2: your partner and your partner decided to get into this, 2015 01:36:22,840 --> 01:36:25,560 Speaker 2: how did honesty ever come up again? Like was it 2016 01:36:25,640 --> 01:36:30,040 Speaker 2: still challenging? Did you actually going against going to relearn 2017 01:36:30,280 --> 01:36:33,240 Speaker 2: like that reflex of just or like not even relearn it, 2018 01:36:33,439 --> 01:36:35,880 Speaker 2: just learn it in general of like what what when 2019 01:36:35,920 --> 01:36:36,920 Speaker 2: your default. 2020 01:36:36,560 --> 01:36:40,880 Speaker 4: Is it hurts even it hurts even more. I'll tell 2021 01:36:40,880 --> 01:36:44,559 Speaker 4: you that it hurts even more when the times I've 2022 01:36:44,640 --> 01:36:47,479 Speaker 4: been in this space and lie to my partner, it's 2023 01:36:47,600 --> 01:36:53,479 Speaker 4: like you can talk about anything. Why would you you 2024 01:36:53,560 --> 01:36:54,920 Speaker 4: know or why would you do that action? 2025 01:36:55,560 --> 01:36:57,680 Speaker 1: Well, then it's like then you realize it's not it's 2026 01:36:57,760 --> 01:36:58,799 Speaker 1: like something else. 2027 01:36:58,840 --> 01:37:00,920 Speaker 4: Exactly, And then I got I'd be like, why what 2028 01:37:01,240 --> 01:37:06,040 Speaker 4: is the thing? Like, you know, why do you need 2029 01:37:06,120 --> 01:37:08,839 Speaker 4: to like, you know, the the kink of being sneaky 2030 01:37:09,160 --> 01:37:11,559 Speaker 4: You're right, you know, then you got that little kink 2031 01:37:11,640 --> 01:37:13,400 Speaker 4: of being sneaky, you know, do you think. 2032 01:37:13,320 --> 01:37:15,519 Speaker 2: It's like a little human to want to like withhold 2033 01:37:15,680 --> 01:37:18,920 Speaker 2: things for yourself, like even in this realm, even or to. 2034 01:37:18,960 --> 01:37:21,360 Speaker 3: Be naughty, to like to like doubt, to like debt, 2035 01:37:21,439 --> 01:37:23,000 Speaker 3: like die, Like I don't even know. 2036 01:37:23,000 --> 01:37:25,000 Speaker 1: If I consider it naughty. It's just like some shit 2037 01:37:25,120 --> 01:37:25,600 Speaker 1: is just for me. 2038 01:37:25,720 --> 01:37:27,720 Speaker 2: But I get that we've made this agreement. It is 2039 01:37:27,760 --> 01:37:30,400 Speaker 2: an agreement. It is an agreement. I don't I'm not 2040 01:37:30,760 --> 01:37:35,880 Speaker 2: donting cheating, Okay, I'm just hear me out. I'm just saying, like, maybe, okay, 2041 01:37:35,920 --> 01:37:37,840 Speaker 2: maybe if it's not related to sex, it feels different 2042 01:37:37,880 --> 01:37:40,000 Speaker 2: because sex feels like such a it's the most powerful 2043 01:37:40,080 --> 01:37:41,960 Speaker 2: frequency in the world, and we're agreeing to share in 2044 01:37:42,000 --> 01:37:42,479 Speaker 2: that space. 2045 01:37:43,160 --> 01:37:44,839 Speaker 1: But I think innately maybe because. 2046 01:37:44,600 --> 01:37:47,040 Speaker 3: If you because if you withhold something that's just for you, 2047 01:37:47,360 --> 01:37:50,960 Speaker 3: that's like something that happened when you, like you ran 2048 01:37:51,040 --> 01:37:52,840 Speaker 3: in you know, you opened a book and it's something 2049 01:37:52,840 --> 01:37:55,280 Speaker 3: that your grandfather told you and it's very deep. Maybe 2050 01:37:55,280 --> 01:37:58,120 Speaker 3: you withhold that because it's just something that you understood, Like, 2051 01:37:58,160 --> 01:37:59,720 Speaker 3: I don't know. But then if it's something that has 2052 01:37:59,760 --> 01:38:01,839 Speaker 3: to do with sexual maybe. 2053 01:38:01,760 --> 01:38:03,320 Speaker 2: Sex and love are not supposed to be put in 2054 01:38:03,400 --> 01:38:06,080 Speaker 2: these boxes and it's supposed to feel like just you 2055 01:38:06,200 --> 01:38:09,320 Speaker 2: can be completely honest and sharing. I think that's maybe 2056 01:38:09,479 --> 01:38:13,800 Speaker 2: the human flower programming that we've told ourselves that we're 2057 01:38:13,840 --> 01:38:15,439 Speaker 2: supposed to live in the dark. 2058 01:38:15,520 --> 01:38:17,960 Speaker 4: In some way, part of it is is pushing those 2059 01:38:18,040 --> 01:38:20,760 Speaker 4: boundaries and making those mistakes, you know, doing that lie 2060 01:38:20,760 --> 01:38:22,479 Speaker 4: and then what did that lie teach you? What did 2061 01:38:22,520 --> 01:38:23,360 Speaker 4: you learn from that line? 2062 01:38:23,520 --> 01:38:26,679 Speaker 3: Or isn't that because sex and love are not supposed 2063 01:38:26,680 --> 01:38:29,959 Speaker 3: to be in boundaries like it's supposed to be boundless. 2064 01:38:30,280 --> 01:38:32,920 Speaker 3: You're not supposed to have rule over whatever, like it 2065 01:38:32,920 --> 01:38:36,160 Speaker 3: shouldn't be like I think we are free into the 2066 01:38:36,240 --> 01:38:38,320 Speaker 3: realms that were like, but if you do this, you 2067 01:38:38,360 --> 01:38:41,240 Speaker 3: should tell me first. And we find ourselves resisting that 2068 01:38:41,439 --> 01:38:44,719 Speaker 3: because love and sex and chemistry and how your body 2069 01:38:44,760 --> 01:38:48,000 Speaker 3: feels is so not methodical. I can't be like cold 2070 01:38:48,040 --> 01:38:50,479 Speaker 3: that thought one second, Hey babe, you know we could. 2071 01:38:50,720 --> 01:38:53,160 Speaker 3: It seems that simple. But like time and time again, 2072 01:38:53,200 --> 01:38:55,880 Speaker 3: we find ourselves in situations where I mean, not like 2073 01:38:55,960 --> 01:39:01,439 Speaker 3: me specifically, but you find yourself and see, I know 2074 01:39:02,080 --> 01:39:05,000 Speaker 3: how yourself in situations where things just fall in and 2075 01:39:05,080 --> 01:39:07,080 Speaker 3: then you find yourself explaining yourself and what did you 2076 01:39:07,120 --> 01:39:11,160 Speaker 3: lie about? Sneaky to be like the kink being sneaky 2077 01:39:11,200 --> 01:39:12,840 Speaker 3: or is it that it's not something that is it 2078 01:39:12,920 --> 01:39:14,280 Speaker 3: supposed to be? Actually that's the. 2079 01:39:14,360 --> 01:39:17,639 Speaker 4: That's the whole. It's funny because I like on my team, 2080 01:39:17,800 --> 01:39:20,920 Speaker 4: like I tell him like, look, I'm not I'm not 2081 01:39:20,960 --> 01:39:23,080 Speaker 4: hooking up with anybody on the team, you know. But 2082 01:39:23,240 --> 01:39:26,320 Speaker 4: like if I say that, right, I can I just 2083 01:39:26,360 --> 01:39:28,080 Speaker 4: tell people like, hey, guys, I wouldn't hook up with 2084 01:39:28,160 --> 01:39:30,240 Speaker 4: anybody on the team. But it's on you because the 2085 01:39:30,280 --> 01:39:32,080 Speaker 4: second I'm like, hey, don't hook up with anybody on 2086 01:39:32,080 --> 01:39:34,320 Speaker 4: the teams, Like now I've given them a kink and 2087 01:39:34,479 --> 01:39:38,840 Speaker 4: myself a kink everybody, just so I don't have to 2088 01:39:38,880 --> 01:39:41,479 Speaker 4: think of I'm gonna with them, I'm going to you 2089 01:39:41,520 --> 01:39:42,800 Speaker 4: know what I mean. So it's like you got to 2090 01:39:43,080 --> 01:39:45,800 Speaker 4: allow people those freedoms to be like, hey, guys, if 2091 01:39:45,840 --> 01:39:47,759 Speaker 4: I were you, you know, things can get weird between 2092 01:39:47,840 --> 01:39:53,160 Speaker 4: deep But man, this has been This has been great. 2093 01:39:53,280 --> 01:39:55,760 Speaker 3: I've really enjoyed getting high with you, Michael and picking 2094 01:39:55,840 --> 01:40:00,559 Speaker 3: your brain. You're recanting my story my very for unique 2095 01:40:00,600 --> 01:40:02,080 Speaker 3: festival play party experience. 2096 01:40:03,040 --> 01:40:05,360 Speaker 1: Speaking of picking, I think it's time for tarot time. 2097 01:40:05,560 --> 01:40:07,759 Speaker 4: Okay, what's tarot cars? 2098 01:40:29,720 --> 01:40:30,920 Speaker 1: What does it look like to you, what do you 2099 01:40:31,000 --> 01:40:32,040 Speaker 1: what do you see? When you look? 2100 01:40:32,080 --> 01:40:32,240 Speaker 4: There? 2101 01:40:33,640 --> 01:40:34,599 Speaker 1: Looks rather phallic. 2102 01:40:34,920 --> 01:40:43,800 Speaker 4: I see uh, I see the Kanye West album Dark 2103 01:40:44,160 --> 01:40:45,480 Speaker 4: Fantasy because. 2104 01:40:45,200 --> 01:40:45,759 Speaker 1: Of that cloud. 2105 01:40:45,800 --> 01:40:46,000 Speaker 4: In the. 2106 01:40:47,800 --> 01:40:50,760 Speaker 3: Means, the Ace of Swords marks a wave of new 2107 01:40:50,960 --> 01:40:53,920 Speaker 3: energy from the intellectual realms. You may be on the 2108 01:40:54,000 --> 01:40:56,240 Speaker 3: verge of a significant breakthrough or a new way of 2109 01:40:56,320 --> 01:40:58,880 Speaker 3: thinking that allows you to view the world with clear eyes. 2110 01:40:59,360 --> 01:41:02,360 Speaker 3: Or you may have a sudden realization or conscious understanding 2111 01:41:02,439 --> 01:41:05,040 Speaker 3: about an issue that has been troubling you and can 2112 01:41:05,120 --> 01:41:08,280 Speaker 3: finally see the path ahead of you. Meditate regularly to 2113 01:41:08,360 --> 01:41:11,240 Speaker 3: clear away for mental from mental chatter and make the 2114 01:41:11,320 --> 01:41:15,160 Speaker 3: most of this intellectual potential. It's a sign of encouragement. 2115 01:41:15,240 --> 01:41:18,320 Speaker 3: It says mind is an expansion mode. You're open to 2116 01:41:18,520 --> 01:41:23,600 Speaker 3: embracing new ideas, craving stimulation, and you'll jump at the 2117 01:41:23,680 --> 01:41:27,679 Speaker 3: next opportunity to learn something new. You thrive on new ideas, inspiration, 2118 01:41:27,840 --> 01:41:31,000 Speaker 3: original thinking, and vision, and you are excited to pursue 2119 01:41:31,080 --> 01:41:36,679 Speaker 3: new opportunities that draw upon the creative intellectual abilities. Sounds 2120 01:41:36,760 --> 01:41:38,040 Speaker 3: like Michael from the play Baby. 2121 01:41:38,880 --> 01:41:40,800 Speaker 1: Sounds like that scorteshop to me, sounds. 2122 01:41:40,560 --> 01:41:44,880 Speaker 4: Like fel like I feel like the devout Christians are 2123 01:41:44,880 --> 01:41:46,400 Speaker 4: going to see that's see, he's going to turn to 2124 01:41:46,520 --> 01:41:47,040 Speaker 4: Jesus soon. 2125 01:41:48,240 --> 01:41:51,800 Speaker 3: The Christians, the devout Christians, have already given up on 2126 01:41:52,680 --> 01:41:54,680 Speaker 3: good amount of choices. They don't think they're trying to think. 2127 01:41:54,720 --> 01:41:59,639 Speaker 4: So no, thank you that card that card fell fell 2128 01:41:59,720 --> 01:42:04,200 Speaker 4: really good. I love this space that Shall have created. 2129 01:42:04,280 --> 01:42:06,760 Speaker 4: I say this, you know, during for every podcast, like 2130 01:42:06,960 --> 01:42:09,760 Speaker 4: just thank you for what you're doing, Like this is 2131 01:42:09,880 --> 01:42:12,840 Speaker 4: the real work. This is when people are like, oh, 2132 01:42:12,880 --> 01:42:14,760 Speaker 4: you guys just talk about Yeah, you guys are talking 2133 01:42:14,800 --> 01:42:17,040 Speaker 4: about it and being about it. You're having these hard 2134 01:42:17,080 --> 01:42:22,040 Speaker 4: conversations that are allowing others and inspiring them to have 2135 01:42:22,200 --> 01:42:24,200 Speaker 4: the conversations because this is how you have it. Here's 2136 01:42:24,400 --> 01:42:28,040 Speaker 4: here's some language to use while you're having that conversation. 2137 01:42:28,320 --> 01:42:31,439 Speaker 4: So you know, I'm picking up what you're putting down. 2138 01:42:32,720 --> 01:42:33,000 Speaker 1: Thank you. 2139 01:42:33,200 --> 01:42:33,640 Speaker 4: I love it. 2140 01:42:33,720 --> 01:42:37,280 Speaker 2: I feel grateful to be in in company of creators 2141 01:42:37,360 --> 01:42:41,479 Speaker 2: and people that want to push the boundaries and understanding 2142 01:42:41,520 --> 01:42:44,280 Speaker 2: that making people uncomfortable is actually where the change and 2143 01:42:44,520 --> 01:42:48,160 Speaker 2: the expansion happens. And also when it's coupled with play 2144 01:42:48,360 --> 01:42:54,160 Speaker 2: and pleasure and healing and just really experiencing life at 2145 01:42:54,200 --> 01:42:57,320 Speaker 2: a ten you know, And I think like that's what 2146 01:42:57,760 --> 01:42:59,799 Speaker 2: we're We've been committed to and that's what we're encouraging 2147 01:43:00,080 --> 01:43:00,960 Speaker 2: people to be committed to. 2148 01:43:01,040 --> 01:43:05,040 Speaker 1: And it sounds like that's what you're doing. So yeah, nigga, 2149 01:43:05,320 --> 01:43:09,960 Speaker 1: we're doing We made it made we made it how 2150 01:43:09,960 --> 01:43:10,880 Speaker 1: other people where they could fight. 2151 01:43:14,600 --> 01:43:18,280 Speaker 4: The play dot l a is the website at the 2152 01:43:18,360 --> 01:43:25,600 Speaker 4: play dot l a is the instagram. My Instagram, I 2153 01:43:25,800 --> 01:43:27,120 Speaker 4: just I don't know. 2154 01:43:27,400 --> 01:43:29,640 Speaker 1: You be putting it out. You don't. No one's forcing you. 2155 01:43:29,600 --> 01:43:32,120 Speaker 4: To do anything. My instagram is Michael Hollis. 2156 01:43:33,840 --> 01:43:35,120 Speaker 1: I don't know here it is. 2157 01:43:36,120 --> 01:43:38,720 Speaker 4: I don't know. Thank you for the shut up, but 2158 01:43:39,000 --> 01:43:43,760 Speaker 4: but yeah, my instagram, that's my instagram. You know, check 2159 01:43:43,800 --> 01:43:47,400 Speaker 4: out the art. Check out the art. If you're feeling courageous, 2160 01:43:47,479 --> 01:43:50,840 Speaker 4: you know, submitt an application. Refer this show as as 2161 01:43:50,880 --> 01:43:56,479 Speaker 4: the application. Try something new and it's not for everybody, 2162 01:43:57,360 --> 01:43:59,559 Speaker 4: but at least you can say you tried it. Mm hmm. 2163 01:44:00,040 --> 01:44:02,680 Speaker 4: Don't got to be mine. Just anything out there. Like, 2164 01:44:02,800 --> 01:44:08,320 Speaker 4: my encouragement is to explore your sexuality more, try to 2165 01:44:09,120 --> 01:44:11,360 Speaker 4: connect more with people. This is the whole point of 2166 01:44:11,439 --> 01:44:14,320 Speaker 4: what I'm trying to do. Like, at its fucking core, 2167 01:44:14,520 --> 01:44:19,080 Speaker 4: it's just because of technology. And just where we're headed. 2168 01:44:19,120 --> 01:44:21,200 Speaker 4: We're in front of screens all the time, we're in 2169 01:44:21,600 --> 01:44:26,200 Speaker 4: these boxes. You know, it feels it's feeling more and 2170 01:44:26,320 --> 01:44:31,200 Speaker 4: more alone, you know, and having these spaces where people 2171 01:44:31,360 --> 01:44:37,799 Speaker 4: can connect on connect vulnerably, you know, naked, half dressed, 2172 01:44:37,880 --> 01:44:44,639 Speaker 4: expressing themselves artistically, like this is where I really want 2173 01:44:44,720 --> 01:44:48,040 Speaker 4: to I would I'd like to experience connection and and 2174 01:44:50,439 --> 01:44:53,360 Speaker 4: having the option that if if we really do connect deeply, 2175 01:44:53,479 --> 01:44:56,720 Speaker 4: like we can be physical with it too. And that's 2176 01:44:56,960 --> 01:44:59,920 Speaker 4: and that lasted in that moment though, I'm so happy 2177 01:45:00,000 --> 01:45:04,439 Speaker 4: I got to experience you, this dope ass human. You 2178 01:45:04,560 --> 01:45:07,439 Speaker 4: know that our ancestors all led us to this moment 2179 01:45:07,520 --> 01:45:09,240 Speaker 4: and we get to connect. 2180 01:45:08,960 --> 01:45:12,719 Speaker 1: Like that and shame and just joy and pleasure. 2181 01:45:13,000 --> 01:45:17,080 Speaker 4: Yeah, and then go your separate ways. But the clubs 2182 01:45:17,120 --> 01:45:18,760 Speaker 4: and everything, you know, like the clubs right now, it's 2183 01:45:18,800 --> 01:45:22,760 Speaker 4: just loud music's dark lights. You know, don't get me something. 2184 01:45:22,840 --> 01:45:23,960 Speaker 4: Beats are dope, but. 2185 01:45:24,160 --> 01:45:26,360 Speaker 2: Like you know, a curated experience that's like built with 2186 01:45:26,479 --> 01:45:29,400 Speaker 2: intention is always going to benefit you long term. I 2187 01:45:29,479 --> 01:45:32,120 Speaker 2: want to be in spaces that when I leave, like 2188 01:45:32,320 --> 01:45:35,000 Speaker 2: it keeps going, like the medicine keeps going, It keeps 2189 01:45:35,360 --> 01:45:38,080 Speaker 2: serving me in a way that has like actually benefited 2190 01:45:38,160 --> 01:45:41,200 Speaker 2: my life instead of just drained everything from me, wasted 2191 01:45:41,280 --> 01:45:43,599 Speaker 2: my time, my energy, and now I'm hungover and fucking 2192 01:45:43,640 --> 01:45:45,600 Speaker 2: pissed off because I'm taking care of my daughter and 2193 01:45:45,720 --> 01:45:46,240 Speaker 2: she's crying. 2194 01:45:47,200 --> 01:45:50,240 Speaker 4: You guys, are you guys are doing it with your retreat? Yeah, 2195 01:45:50,320 --> 01:45:52,479 Speaker 4: you know you're creating these spaces in these ways for 2196 01:45:52,640 --> 01:45:55,559 Speaker 4: people to connect, you know. So it's it's it's an 2197 01:45:55,600 --> 01:45:58,160 Speaker 4: honor to be amongst amongst you. And I hope the 2198 01:45:58,240 --> 01:45:59,920 Speaker 4: retreat is dope. I've heard good things. Thank you. 2199 01:46:00,040 --> 01:46:02,120 Speaker 1: Yeah, you gotta come, you and your partnership come to 2200 01:46:02,160 --> 01:46:05,960 Speaker 1: our couples have to come to our couples retreat. It's 2201 01:46:05,960 --> 01:46:06,360 Speaker 1: in June. 2202 01:46:06,520 --> 01:46:09,840 Speaker 2: It's actually the week after your party. Okay, Yeah, maybe 2203 01:46:09,840 --> 01:46:11,680 Speaker 2: a little celebration for the party. 2204 01:46:11,600 --> 01:46:12,479 Speaker 1: That would be really nice. 2205 01:46:12,600 --> 01:46:15,760 Speaker 2: Actually, Yeah, so it's June fourteenth. If you guys are 2206 01:46:15,800 --> 01:46:19,160 Speaker 2: listening to and you have a couple or a situation ship. 2207 01:46:19,000 --> 01:46:21,439 Speaker 3: If you're in a poly relationship, we can accommodate that too. 2208 01:46:21,640 --> 01:46:29,559 Speaker 2: Yeah, and know what, ILL on the gate backrom you're invited. 2209 01:46:30,400 --> 01:46:31,880 Speaker 1: Make sure you check out the good vibera treat. 2210 01:46:32,280 --> 01:46:34,560 Speaker 2: I'll leave the link in this episode description but the 2211 01:46:34,760 --> 01:46:37,240 Speaker 2: dates are June fourteenth through the nineteenth. 2212 01:46:37,479 --> 01:46:39,479 Speaker 3: It's gonna also be my birthday. We're gonna be in 2213 01:46:39,479 --> 01:46:41,800 Speaker 3: the Caribbean side of Costa Rica. It's gonna be fun. 2214 01:46:41,920 --> 01:46:42,120 Speaker 4: Yeah. 2215 01:46:42,200 --> 01:46:46,040 Speaker 1: We have some pretty amazing couples coming, including hopefully you 2216 01:46:48,360 --> 01:46:50,280 Speaker 1: where can the people? Oh yourself? People can find you? 2217 01:46:50,880 --> 01:46:54,519 Speaker 1: I guess is that it? That's it? All right? 2218 01:46:54,640 --> 01:46:56,879 Speaker 2: Well, make sure you follow us at Good Mom's Underscore 2219 01:46:56,920 --> 01:47:00,240 Speaker 2: Bad Choices, follow us on YouTube, subscribe to our podcast 2220 01:47:00,280 --> 01:47:01,560 Speaker 2: on all podcast platforms. 2221 01:47:01,680 --> 01:47:04,600 Speaker 3: Rate and review this episode and our show because it 2222 01:47:04,800 --> 01:47:07,080 Speaker 3: really helps us, and you listen for free, so pay 2223 01:47:07,160 --> 01:47:10,000 Speaker 3: us in subscriptions and comments. Thanks. 2224 01:47:10,160 --> 01:47:14,280 Speaker 2: Basically, just go to the caption of this episode and 2225 01:47:14,360 --> 01:47:16,120 Speaker 2: you'll see all of our links, and then you can 2226 01:47:16,280 --> 01:47:19,599 Speaker 2: just go click crazy, look crazy, click crazy. 2227 01:47:20,840 --> 01:47:21,759 Speaker 4: I love everybody. 2228 01:47:22,479 --> 01:47:22,839 Speaker 1: Please. 2229 01:47:23,479 --> 01:47:26,639 Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm living so good. Can't you tell? I went 2230 01:47:26,760 --> 01:47:27,360 Speaker 4: through a drought? 2231 01:47:27,439 --> 01:47:29,000 Speaker 3: That's until I find out well, may. 2232 01:47:28,960 --> 01:47:30,960 Speaker 4: Might have been known earth. I used to be broken 2233 01:47:31,080 --> 01:47:34,439 Speaker 4: tail now got the blues, dancing like Beyonce, jaw throat 2234 01:47:34,520 --> 01:47:37,480 Speaker 4: shot or pop in this coy wearing our voices. Patriarchy 2235 01:47:37,640 --> 01:47:39,960 Speaker 4: kept it in the box to what's Floid's women put 2236 01:47:40,000 --> 01:47:42,240 Speaker 4: the pe and powers. So what's pointing? Do they want 2237 01:47:42,280 --> 01:47:45,200 Speaker 4: me to be good? So I made bad choices. Bad mom, 2238 01:47:45,360 --> 01:47:47,160 Speaker 4: not a bad mom, but a bad mom. 2239 01:47:47,280 --> 01:47:49,400 Speaker 1: Gitter's in on put cannabis. 2240 01:47:49,000 --> 01:47:51,439 Speaker 4: In their bath. Bon walked in Bossu's cap, and I 2241 01:47:51,520 --> 01:47:53,080 Speaker 4: blew his cat, boss hot dog. 2242 01:47:53,200 --> 01:47:54,240 Speaker 1: Now I'm immune to. 2243 01:47:54,280 --> 01:47:56,680 Speaker 4: The cat called Herbie and no waisted straight to it 2244 01:47:56,880 --> 01:47:59,040 Speaker 4: like a dollar sign. Mother, rent the number? When to it? 2245 01:47:59,240 --> 01:48:01,759 Speaker 3: It's like a water Sorry you're in the winter resential 2246 01:48:01,800 --> 01:48:02,840 Speaker 3: will when the summertime. 2247 01:48:03,080 --> 01:48:04,800 Speaker 4: I do what doll ain't no one that needs to 2248 01:48:04,920 --> 01:48:05,400 Speaker 4: run it by