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Speaker 1: Today's Daily Highlight from Elvis Duran in the Morning Show.

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Speaker 2: Have you ever been accused of apologizing too much and

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Speaker 2: saying I'm sorry too much?

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Speaker 3: No one, no one in this room sorry for things

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Speaker 3: you shouldn't say you're sorry for. Like if you're exactly

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Speaker 3: in the supermarket aisle and you're looking at something and

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Speaker 3: you're blocking somebody, you don't have to say I'm sorry.

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Speaker 3: You can just say, oh, excuse me, yeah, exactly, You're

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Speaker 3: not sorry, but you're sorry. And that's why it's kind

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Speaker 3: of taking the effect away.

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Speaker 4: Exactly.

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Speaker 2: If I'm late for getting on a zoom meeting whatever,

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Speaker 2: I never say I'm sorry for being late anymore. I

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Speaker 2: always say thank you for your patient something different.

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Speaker 5: Right, Well, that's very good.

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Speaker 6: I have a question about that, though. Yes, I've glad

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Speaker 6: that that's what we're supposed to do to not feel bad,

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Speaker 6: you know whatever. However, don't you think sometimes we should

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Speaker 6: be sorry, Like if you're holding everybody else up and

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Speaker 6: they're waiting for you on a meeting and you walk

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Speaker 6: in late, you shouldn't be like, oh sorry, guys.

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Speaker 4: Well no, I agree with that.

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Speaker 2: No, there's nothing if you are the cause of someone

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Speaker 2: else having to be late or something. There's nothing wrong

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Speaker 2: with apologizing my apologies, Like a.

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Speaker 6: Bit of personal accountability is okay, exactly okay.

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Speaker 2: But there are things in life you shouldn't apologize for it.

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Speaker 2: I was reading this online. Number one, you want a

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Speaker 2: life that's out of the ordinary. Never apologize for that.

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Speaker 2: And I bring that up because the number two, you

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Speaker 2: may be an imaginative and creative person at a level

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Speaker 2: that some people find to be too much, which I

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Speaker 2: am at times. I'm so. I'm sure we all are.

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Speaker 2: That's how we became friends on this show.

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Speaker 4: Sure we're all.

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Speaker 2: Over the top, and some people can't handle the level

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Speaker 2: of intensity that we throw out there.

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Speaker 4: Gandhi.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely, I mean I say this all the time.

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Speaker 6: When you have a group of people who are their

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Speaker 6: job is to entertain, that doesn't just shut off when

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Speaker 6: we get off there. People are here because they are

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Speaker 6: who they are. None of this is put on and

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Speaker 6: that goes all day.

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Speaker 4: Baby and Danielle, Danielle, people.

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Speaker 5: Could you decompress just a little bit.

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Speaker 4: We're all like that. That's what us together here.

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Speaker 2: We're all over the top, so never apologizing for it

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Speaker 2: is not fair to ourselves. You know, I could, I

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Speaker 2: could gaslight and say I'm sorry you don't like my intensity.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm sorry you can't handle it.

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Speaker 2: Sorry, you can't handle that intensity. Things you should never

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Speaker 2: apologize for. You have big dreams that others find unrealistic.

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Speaker 2: Oh god, you know what, You're right, I'm sorry. I

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Speaker 2: shouldn't dream big if you.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, you to that.

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Speaker 1: I love people that support my nonsense, like, I'm gonna go. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: you do that, you.

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Speaker 2: Go, I'll be waiting back here in two hours with

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Speaker 2: your dinner.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 4: Never apologize.

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Speaker 2: You have your own schedule and priorities, and you aren't

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Speaker 2: always available. Never apologize because you know me, I'm the

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Speaker 2: least available person on the planet Earth.

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Speaker 4: I don't apologize for it, do you.

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Speaker 5: I have a Yeah, I'm still learning. If I can't

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Speaker 5: do something or can't be somewhere, I feel bad and

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Speaker 5: I'm always like, I'm sorry, I can't do I'm sorry.

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Speaker 5: But at the same time, Nate's always telling me, Daniel,

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Speaker 5: if your mental health you can't do everything. Yeah, well

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Speaker 5: that's the thing.

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Speaker 2: You should never apologize saying no to people and requests

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Speaker 2: that go against your values or your plans. Call that

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Speaker 2: sounds like a lot of fun. I can't make that

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Speaker 2: can't make it. I'm not gonna say I'm sorry. I'm

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Speaker 2: sorry I can't make it. No, I'm just I can't

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Speaker 2: make it.

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Speaker 5: If it's against my values, I'm not going to do

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Speaker 5: it with the value exactly.

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Speaker 4: They should know.

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Speaker 2: Well, we're so loud and over the stop, they should

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Speaker 2: pretty much know our values at this point.

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Speaker 5: Could you do a mayonnaise event?

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Speaker 1: Oh god, what I go to that though? Just watch

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Speaker 1: a puke all day?

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Speaker 2: Bye way, I'll bring a bucket. Never apologize. You sometimes

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Speaker 2: have difficult emotions that are hard to explain or express,

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Speaker 2: even to those who are close to you. You know,

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Speaker 2: sometimes we know that we're reeling over something that's bothered

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Speaker 2: us or is not sitting right with us. Just because

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Speaker 2: you cannot instantly say what that is doesn't mean you

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Speaker 2: should say I'm sorry.

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Speaker 4: You know.

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Speaker 2: It's like, look, you know I'm dealing. I processing. So

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Speaker 2: I love that word process. The word process is a

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Speaker 2: powerful word. What are you doing right now? How can

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Speaker 2: you don't tell me how you feel about this? I'm

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Speaker 2: processing it right now. Well, if they get mattered you

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Speaker 2: for not having an opinion about what you're processing immediately,

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Speaker 2: that means they just are waiting for you to say

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Speaker 2: what they would agree with, and if you say you

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Speaker 2: don't agree with it, then you're an evil person. Never

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Speaker 2: apologize for your own personal safety and well being. Oh yeah,

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Speaker 2: never letting those things take precedence when you feel under threat.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 6: We talk about that one all the time, especially when

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Speaker 6: it comes to women walking down the street. If you

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Speaker 6: feel somebody behind you, A lot of people don't want

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Speaker 6: to turn around and look because they feel badly like, oh, I.

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Speaker 1: Might hurt that person's feelings. Who cares? You can turn

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Speaker 1: around and look and see who's behind you.

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Speaker 4: That's important, true, Well, yeah, it's being street smart.

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Speaker 5: Uh.

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Speaker 2: Never apologize when you're leveling up and getting stricter in

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Speaker 2: every area of your life. Now take it from me,

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Speaker 2: the oldest one on the show. I'm fighting with age.

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Speaker 2: I am definitely leveling up, definitely getting stricter in almost

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Speaker 2: every area of my life. I'm not going to apologize

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Speaker 2: for it. If you don't understand that, then well you know,

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Speaker 2: did you? It's tough, titties. It's up to you to

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Speaker 2: figure out. You know what I'm saying. You gotta you know,

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Speaker 2: you're on your own journey and some day you're gonna

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Speaker 2: look at someone go, you know what, You're right, I

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Speaker 2: am leveling up and I deserve it.

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Speaker 1: Absolutely.

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Speaker 6: You're the only person who has to live your life

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Speaker 6: twenty four to seven, so you might as well do

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Speaker 6: it the way you want to do it, and so

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Speaker 6: trying to make everybody else happy.

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Speaker 2: You know, that's a good point. I'm living this life

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Speaker 2: I have twenty four seven. Can you imagine living with this? No,

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Speaker 2: it's stressful enough not going to apologize for it. Never

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Speaker 2: need to apologize for your friendships and relationships as they evolve.

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Speaker 4: And as some of them end.

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Speaker 1: That's a tough one.

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Speaker 2: When I said that, you immediately had several people in

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Speaker 2: your mind, did you not?

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Speaker 5: Yeah?

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Speaker 6: Absolutely, it's hard because I, at least for me, people

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Speaker 6: who I grew up with, I feel like we've grown

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Speaker 6: up together, we have this bond. Why break it because

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Speaker 6: we've been through so much. But sometimes you just grow

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Speaker 6: apart and it's okay to not be friends with those

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Speaker 6: people anymore.

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Speaker 1: But it feels true.

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Speaker 5: And I get sad because like, there are a couple

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Speaker 5: of people who like things have happened where we're not

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Speaker 5: friends anymore, and I probably can't. I don't want to

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Speaker 5: forgive for certain things, which you know, but it makes

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Speaker 5: me sad because we were so close and we were

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Speaker 5: in everybody, We were in each other's lives all the time,

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Speaker 5: and we you know, we haven't talked in years now.

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Speaker 4: It's like, but you've both grown.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, just makes part well, you know, and when it's

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Speaker 2: time to sever a relationship here with someone, how many times?

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Speaker 2: What percentage of times you do that because they get

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Speaker 2: mad at you and blame you for things they caused.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, so many times.

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Speaker 5: I don't even want to go there.

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Speaker 2: Well, it's the most obvious of all severances of all

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Speaker 2: breakups and friendships.

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Speaker 5: I once had a phone call come in and I

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Speaker 5: was like waiting. I'm like, oh, great, they're gonna apologize.

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Speaker 5: I can't wait. I was like, great, it's gonna totally

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Speaker 5: take care of everything. And the phone call was to

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Speaker 5: tell me that I was and yelled at me for

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Speaker 5: what I did. Yes, I almost fainted on the floor.

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Speaker 5: I gosh, I almost fainted. I was like, this is

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Speaker 5: what I couldn't believe it.

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Speaker 1: That happened to me once too.

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Speaker 6: I had a friend and everyone had the same problem

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Speaker 6: with him, but I said, I'm going to talk to

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Speaker 6: him about my problem. I'm not going to drag anybody

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Speaker 6: else into it. It's just going to be what I feel.

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Speaker 6: I started telling him this is how I feel, this

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Speaker 6: is what's going on, and he literally looked me in

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Speaker 6: the face and said, nobody has ever said that to me,

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Speaker 6: because nobody feels it.

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Speaker 1: That must be a you problem. It took all my

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Speaker 1: energy not to be like we all feel it.

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Speaker 4: I didn't do it, I know.

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Speaker 2: But when you hear someone say that to you, then

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Speaker 2: you don't have to say anything out loud. You internalize

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Speaker 2: your words. Your words are this is never going to work.

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Speaker 4: This is that. We are so done. Thank you for

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Speaker 4: saying that.

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Speaker 2: You have totally defined where we're going with this relationship

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Speaker 2: or we're not going.

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Speaker 6: But my boyfriend was sitting with us at the table

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Speaker 6: when it happened, and he was like, oh, no.

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Speaker 1: I'll be back, and he just gotta be lest.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: No, I mean I now have a list of well

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Speaker 2: I'm thinking of one person in particular, just to focus

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Speaker 2: on it, just for the sake of conversation. In my head,

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Speaker 2: someone who so wronged me. Yet I was blamed for

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Speaker 2: everything that happened, right, and so you know, everyone listening

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Speaker 2: to this conversation can at least pend point one person

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Speaker 2: in their life who has gone down that road with them.

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Speaker 2: You know what, great, it's now defined, and now you

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Speaker 2: know it's it's easy to move on. And if ever

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Speaker 2: they ask me, I could either be nice and go no,

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Speaker 2: everything's fine, or I can say, you know what, a

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Speaker 2: lot of things happened in our past that I believe

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Speaker 2: you caused, but I got blamed for them, and you

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Speaker 2: feel like I put you in that position.

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Speaker 4: I didn't.

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Speaker 2: You did, but some people don't like to take responsibility

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Speaker 2: for those things.

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Speaker 4: Nate, you know it was Nate, you know what I'm

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Speaker 4: talking about. I'm kidding. I'm kidding.

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Speaker 6: I recently read something that really made a difference to me,

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Speaker 6: and it said, you don't need to be the hero

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Speaker 6: in somebody else's story to be the hero in your own.

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Speaker 6: Sometimes you're just going to be the villain. And that's

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Speaker 6: so true. You don't have to get that resolution from

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Speaker 6: another person. As long as you're okay with what happened,

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Speaker 6: move on.

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Speaker 2: It's easier said than done. And I'm hoping I can

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Speaker 2: start keep working on that and keep working on that anyway. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: you don't have to be the hero in everyone's story.

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00:09:16,400 --> 00:09:17,320
Speaker 2: Worry about your own.

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Speaker 5: You could be beleeficent.

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Speaker 1: Should have just invited to the party, right, Danielle.

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00:09:22,440 --> 00:09:24,839
Speaker 5: If you just invited a little dead party, none of

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Speaker 5: it is what happened.

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Speaker 4: There you go