Speaker 1: Nicky Glazer Podcast. Here's NICKI. Hello. Hello here I am.
Speaker 1: It's Nicki Glazer Podcast. How are you today? Uh listener? Uh?
Speaker 1: And Noah and Andrew, how are you guys today? We're uh,
Speaker 1: we're good. You're good. I mean we've already kind of
Speaker 1: been on you know, chat together today for I don't know,
Speaker 1: going on an hour plus now. Um, we're in Mexico.
Speaker 1: We're doing the show from Cabo San Lucas, right, is
Speaker 1: that right? Or San Lucas, San Jose, Cabo San Lucas.
Speaker 1: I don't know things. I don't know where I am
Speaker 1: in Mexico at all. I know I'm a two hour
Speaker 1: flight from Los Angeles because I flew in yesterday. But
Speaker 1: that's all I know, baby, and um it's pretty um
Speaker 1: fitting actually, because I was saying to Andrew, was getting
Speaker 1: a little nostalgic because as we were setting up the
Speaker 1: shots and the podcast in um my hotel room here
Speaker 1: in Cabo, I was reminiscent of when we began the
Speaker 1: podcast last March, also in my hotel room while on
Speaker 1: the set of Boy Island, Um, which I am here
Speaker 1: doing season two. I'm sure that's you know, we're not
Speaker 1: supposed to say that. But honestly, are they going to
Speaker 1: take it from me? No one else is going to
Speaker 1: host that show, right not like not yet, They're not
Speaker 1: gonna take it from me. I was thinking, like, what
Speaker 1: if I get hit by a car? They we're starting
Speaker 1: filming pretty soon. What happens if I die or something?
Speaker 1: Who's going to replace me? What would they do? Would
Speaker 1: they just go we can't continue? Maybe they would just
Speaker 1: like Weekend at Bernie it put you in some products
Speaker 1: and throw you up. Depends on how mangled I got
Speaker 1: from the accidental. Yeah, I guess it's UM. I could
Speaker 1: see you, though, Like, I don't know who would do
Speaker 1: your voice. Maybe we could find like a Ray eleven
Speaker 1: year old man kid Boy, Kid, Man Boy, you went
Speaker 1: over every possible age for that that not my gendered. Well,
Speaker 1: thank you for that. I'm excited to be here. I
Speaker 1: have a couple of things to just say right off
Speaker 1: the top that I didn't go over last week that
Speaker 1: are really pertinent to this podcast. Okay, they have to
Speaker 1: do with cars, are you ready? No? But okay, not
Speaker 1: not um Catholic converters, as we all know. I know,
Speaker 1: with those things backward and forward every which way, man
Speaker 1: boy kid and uh. I know there's too early for
Speaker 1: a hamdrop. A call back has to be a hamdrip,
Speaker 1: a real hamdrip. For those of you listening, hamdrip means
Speaker 1: we're doing a call back to a previous uh joke
Speaker 1: from another episode or even from this episode. It has
Speaker 1: to be a minute later at least, otherwise it's just
Speaker 1: forty No. I mean, let's go roll the tape back.
Speaker 1: I think it was turkey drop. Uh tier a turkey tier.
Speaker 1: I like that. That's when it's really close turkey deer. Um. So, okay,
Speaker 1: remember when I told you did I tell you about
Speaker 1: the fender bender? I got into where I let the
Speaker 1: go because I'm just like, I mean, I'm pretty much
Speaker 1: who needs Bob Sagget anymore. I mean I'm around um
Speaker 1: uh no, I so I let so if if you
Speaker 1: didn't know really quickly, I was in a fender bender
Speaker 1: going to um my Lover's radio show a couple of
Speaker 1: weeks ago, and the guy bumped my mom's I'm driving
Speaker 1: my mom's car right now because I bought her a
Speaker 1: car last year and I just took her car. It's
Speaker 1: a two thousand ten Lexus. It's really nice, but it's
Speaker 1: just you know, it's it has it's beat up and
Speaker 1: this guy bumped the thing and I pulled over it.
Speaker 1: I was just like, dude, who cares, Like just I
Speaker 1: don't care. There was a little bit of bump, but
Speaker 1: I was like, just let it go. He looked so nervous,
Speaker 1: and I just wanted to get to radio. I just
Speaker 1: was like, not bothered by it. Also add to the
Speaker 1: aesthetic that that car is going for anyways, It's really
Speaker 1: you know, like, oh that makes sense. I don't understood
Speaker 1: why people are obsessed with dents. I mean, I guess
Speaker 1: it looks shitty, but it doesn't affect how the car moves.
Speaker 1: I mean, I see some cars in St. Louis that
Speaker 1: are driving around without a hood, without a complete back bumper,
Speaker 1: and I like, if they if they go, then they go. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I've seen cars without doors or different doors that I
Speaker 1: don't even think it's the same car, or I think
Speaker 1: it's like a Cadillac door on a Hugo. My dad
Speaker 1: did that. My dad got his door hit on a
Speaker 1: on his car that he bought off of Craigslist. He
Speaker 1: got it hit and he wanted to get it replaced,
Speaker 1: so he found another door on Craigslist somehow of the
Speaker 1: same car, but because it was in the it was
Speaker 1: in Texas, same color, same fear, everything. It was more
Speaker 1: faded than his car because it was in Texas. And
Speaker 1: so it's a different color maroon. Very interesting. I mean,
Speaker 1: I don't want to rather go with a blue on
Speaker 1: a maroon then just slightly hot. Yes, Oh, I know.
Speaker 1: I tried to paint my bedroom walls two different color
Speaker 1: pinks and they're just so sim They're supposed to be
Speaker 1: very different, but they're not different at all. Going back
Speaker 1: to the car, and so I let the guy go
Speaker 1: um cut to a week later, Okay, and this was
Speaker 1: a week and a half ago at this point, maybe longer.
Speaker 1: So it was three weeks ago that it has happened,
Speaker 1: and then a week later. And I meant to tell
Speaker 1: this on the podcast, but it just, you know, my
Speaker 1: mind wonders. I was driving to the recording studio where
Speaker 1: I did that Bob Saget song, among others, and I
Speaker 1: was late, and I was at an intersection, pulling up
Speaker 1: to a red light, and I'm on my phone to
Speaker 1: be honest with you, because I'm trying to wasis my
Speaker 1: way to this recording studio, which I think is a
Speaker 1: normal thing to do on your phone, even though you
Speaker 1: should be on it. I was on ways, so um,
Speaker 1: I was crawling to a stop and then I just
Speaker 1: went too far and bumped the woman in front of
Speaker 1: me pretty hard, I would I would say it was
Speaker 1: probably going miles an hour, which is a pretty it's
Speaker 1: a bump, you know, maybe even more. And um, the
Speaker 1: woman stops. We're at a stoplight, but she puts it
Speaker 1: in park. All the other cars go when it turns green.
Speaker 1: Not not a not a banger, not like a banged up,
Speaker 1: you know car, like a decent car. I back up
Speaker 1: slightly so I can pull out and go away. Now. Um,
Speaker 1: and I see that they've created damage. I see it.
Speaker 1: I see a dent, and I'm like, all right, well
Speaker 1: I can afford it. That's this is a blessing I
Speaker 1: learned my lesson. This is way less than something I
Speaker 1: could do, ways less than other damage I could do.
Speaker 1: Maybe this is a wake up call to not be
Speaker 1: on my phone. Ever it's not. But okay, So then
Speaker 1: people are gonna use this footage when I die in
Speaker 1: a texting accident. So then I am uh, I park,
Speaker 1: I get out. I see the girl get out, look
Speaker 1: at her bumper and just kind of go like like
Speaker 1: a sigh and not really look at me, but get
Speaker 1: back in her car. And I'm like, if she just
Speaker 1: gonna leave, like leave, because she hasn't looked at me
Speaker 1: at all. And then she turns on her blinker and
Speaker 1: she pulls to the side of the road and I
Speaker 1: pulled me behind her and I get out and I go, girl,
Speaker 1: I am so sorry. I was. I was on my phone.
Speaker 1: I'm such an idiot. I go, you know um, and
Speaker 1: she goes, I don't care. She goes it's and I go,
Speaker 1: but there's damage and she goes, oh, it's fine, just
Speaker 1: go And I was like, are you serious right now?
Speaker 1: And I go, but there's there's a dent there and
Speaker 1: she was like, I think it was already there. It's
Speaker 1: not and I was like it wasn't and she was like,
Speaker 1: I just I don't care. And I go, girl, you
Speaker 1: have no idea. I did this exact same thing a
Speaker 1: week ago, but I was you and I had the
Speaker 1: same reaction. I go, this is you're such an angel,
Speaker 1: and I go, can I give you something? I was like,
Speaker 1: do you have a Venmo? And she was like, no,
Speaker 1: I have cash app, and I was like, give me
Speaker 1: your cash app. So she gave me her name and
Speaker 1: m and I sent her, you know, some cash, but
Speaker 1: she totally didn't take my number, take my and I said,
Speaker 1: do you want anything? I go. I'm Nicky Glazer. I'm
Speaker 1: kind of a famous comedian. You can look me up, like,
Speaker 1: here's my email address. I'm gonna text you right now.
Speaker 1: So I'm accountable because I don't know what is gonna
Speaker 1: be further down the road. But I honestly think the
Speaker 1: only reason that happened and wasn't thousands of dollars of
Speaker 1: bullshit with karma because I've never heard a story where
Speaker 1: someone just lets a person go. And this girl was
Speaker 1: not in a good mood. She was um, probably my
Speaker 1: age um, but sheund like she was going through something
Speaker 1: Like she was like I don't want to do the paper.
Speaker 1: She was just like me of like I don't care,
Speaker 1: it's fine, and you know what, what a great it
Speaker 1: made me so funing the day. Well, if if she
Speaker 1: lets you go, right, can she still have insurance cover it? Like?
Speaker 1: What is that's what she want to deal with? Because
Speaker 1: then it raises her insurance rate and it's not but
Speaker 1: not it would raise mine, not hers, right, because I
Speaker 1: was the one that hit her, and my insurance would
Speaker 1: be the one that you know. Yeah, but my thing is,
Speaker 1: if you hit her and you drove away, could she
Speaker 1: go to her insurance company be like, look, someone hit
Speaker 1: me and then I didn't get their information? Why are
Speaker 1: you asked me a question that adults wouldn't know the
Speaker 1: answer to. I'm just wondering because I have no idea.
Speaker 1: I just want to give a shout out to Lakisha
Speaker 1: Mick James point, because she's awesome. My point is is
Speaker 1: that she just doesn't want to get like there's a
Speaker 1: difference between Like I would have been able to I
Speaker 1: would have paid her a lot she would have gotten
Speaker 1: I mean, she would have gotten it paid for completely,
Speaker 1: and it would have been points on my record, not her.
Speaker 1: But it's some people like they'll overreact and they'll say, oh,
Speaker 1: but my neck hurts, and then they try to get
Speaker 1: all this other stuff so they can get litigious. And
Speaker 1: I just wanted to use that word and really, um
Speaker 1: all the other things they can get. I mean, if
Speaker 1: I had Donald Trump like that, it not only would
Speaker 1: he shame me for it, you know, uh, Like this
Speaker 1: is just me making up a thing. But I just
Speaker 1: feel like someone like that if I would have hit
Speaker 1: a Karen, he said of Lakisha, Let's all be Lakisha's
Speaker 1: and just like, let it go. If it's not that
Speaker 1: big of a deal. And if it is a big
Speaker 1: deal and you want to get it fixed, don't be
Speaker 1: an asshole about it. Because we've all been on our phones.
Speaker 1: I wouldn't want the other person to get in trouble
Speaker 1: per se, but I would also want it to be covered,
Speaker 1: so I don't in the hole. It's okay they should
Speaker 1: get in trouble. Like the laws in place, so that yeah,
Speaker 1: your in your your interns should go up if you're
Speaker 1: negligent and you hit someone. So that's all fine, and
Speaker 1: I would have been fine with that, but the fact
Speaker 1: that it wasn't something she cared about enough to get
Speaker 1: fixed obviously, if you're that kind of person, let the
Speaker 1: person go. And what what you can do is, oh,
Speaker 1: you can get the person to pay for it. Just
Speaker 1: don't make the person feel bad about it. Just let's
Speaker 1: be forgive. You can get compensated. But just not being
Speaker 1: an asshole made my day. It is possible though she
Speaker 1: didn't have insurance. Yeah, whatever, it is No, I'm just
Speaker 1: saying that I agree. I'm saying no, like it's not
Speaker 1: just necessarily karma. I don't think just because you let
Speaker 1: that person go that she let you go. There could
Speaker 1: be a reason, like might have Well, karma happens. Not
Speaker 1: because I believe karma happens. It doesn't mean that it
Speaker 1: has to be another person doing a good deed out
Speaker 1: of there the kind of of the heart, because let's
Speaker 1: be honest, mind, wasn't a good deed out of the
Speaker 1: kindness of my heart more than I just I don't
Speaker 1: care about my mom's car. I wanted to get to
Speaker 1: the radio show. You know. It's always a circumstantial Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's what I'm saying. But yeah, but it just like whoa,
Speaker 1: this never happens, but maybe it does a lot. I
Speaker 1: don't know. Um and find now she like just murdered somebody,
Speaker 1: like like, God, you was so not like she just
Speaker 1: let me go. James, the one that's still people the
Speaker 1: nursing home, nur Um No, she was an angel to
Speaker 1: me that day and um and then last night, after
Speaker 1: I dropped you off at home at your hotel, I
Speaker 1: came back to mine and I pulled into a one
Speaker 1: way thing that was there was no harm because there
Speaker 1: was no cars coming, and but it was bad. And
Speaker 1: a cop car turns on its lights and starts pulling
Speaker 1: me over, and then I pulled it's right before my hotel.
Speaker 1: I pulled into my hotel and they just go on
Speaker 1: past because I kind of went out the window like
Speaker 1: I'm a dumb American like kind of like, and they
Speaker 1: just went on pass. And then I pulled into the
Speaker 1: valley and all the valley and I go to the valley. Guys,
Speaker 1: I was like, I did the truck driver like Hong Kong,
Speaker 1: like yes, yes, because they all saw it happening, and
Speaker 1: they were laughing so hard. They kept doing my honking thing.
Speaker 1: They were like, how did you see her doing this honky?
Speaker 1: That is probably They were like, cracker, Cracker, I am yeah.
Speaker 1: I think like you went down one way today and
Speaker 1: the I mean the roads here are a little weird.
Speaker 1: There's no U turns. You're going down on one way
Speaker 1: in the oh in the grocery store, and I wasn't
Speaker 1: It's funny sometimes, like I'll react to your driving, whether
Speaker 1: it's poor or not, and then you get up you're
Speaker 1: like you always tell me like, oh, I thought you
Speaker 1: were talking to me. No, no, no, because I was
Speaker 1: talking to the person in the car. Because I go
Speaker 1: easy call. I always do a little whiny in response
Speaker 1: to like someone who's like when they're going. It is
Speaker 1: one of my favorite things seeing you drive and other
Speaker 1: people getting mad at you and you go, I go,
Speaker 1: come on, oh, I ran over your dog. Honestly, it's
Speaker 1: not it's these aren't traffic. And you know things that
Speaker 1: I'm doing that are like damaging. These are just like
Speaker 1: me backing into a space the wrong way or something.
Speaker 1: You know, who cares? Um, we are in Mexico, Andrew,
Speaker 1: anything to report on your end? Um? Yeah, I when
Speaker 1: you left, I h they give you a box here
Speaker 1: when you shop you they don't give you bags, and
Speaker 1: oh well yeah, and so then I thank you all
Speaker 1: for your comments on the grocery shopping video of Andrew
Speaker 1: dancing last night. That was so fun. I barely had
Speaker 1: enough groceries to carry with just a little over two hands,
Speaker 1: and I used a one of those push cards because
Speaker 1: they give you a box. They don't use bags here,
Speaker 1: which I like, but they put it in a little box.
Speaker 1: And they also wash your car at a grocery store,
Speaker 1: and they work for the grocery store, which is wild
Speaker 1: and we're not looking for money. They just detail your car.
Speaker 1: Well they're looking for money obviously. Yeah, but the people
Speaker 1: aren't there too, what do you mean? I know, but
Speaker 1: when they come back out and the guys standing there
Speaker 1: being like, hey, look it's pretty shiny, hand over the money.
Speaker 1: I brought golf clubs here. There's a lot of golf
Speaker 1: courses in Cabo. And before you even leave the airport,
Speaker 1: like five different guys tried to upsell me on like,
Speaker 1: uh like to go to the golf like they have,
Speaker 1: you know, a relationship with one of these very fancy.
Speaker 1: Not only was I interested, I'm do you get some cards?
Speaker 1: I got some phone numbers to call Edwardo to hook
Speaker 1: up the diamante for But he wanted money then, and
Speaker 1: I didn't give it up. I actually, like I stopped
Speaker 1: myself finally, like but I am that person, Like I'm
Speaker 1: the guy that's like, hey, because come over here and talk.
Speaker 1: Oh we're friend, Like I just want a friend. I
Speaker 1: think I know you said that today about staying so
Speaker 1: Andrew staying at the hotel with all the crew and
Speaker 1: all the producers and everyone, because Andrew was a producer
Speaker 1: on the show. By the way, Um applause break yeah,
Speaker 1: sit down, guys, Yeah, everyone sit down. But Andrew has
Speaker 1: a producer credit. That's so exciting. But um, you are
Speaker 1: staying at this hotel where they are all at, and
Speaker 1: I'm in a resort type place away from everyone because um,
Speaker 1: you're on top of the hill just looking down. I'm
Speaker 1: actually in a basement of this resort. Is kind of weird.
Speaker 1: But um, but Andrew said this morning that it was
Speaker 1: nice to go to like there's like a continental breakfast
Speaker 1: and there's that he goes to the gym and there's
Speaker 1: just it's like a social environment. Yeah, because we're seeing
Speaker 1: all these people that we saw last time, and there
Speaker 1: is something really nice about that. Because I was thinking,
Speaker 1: you know, I had Carlisle stay with me last week,
Speaker 1: and then I went to l A this week and
Speaker 1: I was like alone in my hotel. I really and
Speaker 1: then you've moved out and I had like a week alone.
Speaker 1: But I really do need roommates, even though sometimes I
Speaker 1: just it's it's interesting the difference between being a living
Speaker 1: alone and wanting to like have alone times. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: mean I want to live alone next to my best friends,
Speaker 1: Like I don't want the responsibility because I feel like
Speaker 1: a lot of our arguments, or like even minor arguments
Speaker 1: with Brandon, like they're all it always comes down. It
Speaker 1: comes down to duties and like who's doing what. I'd
Speaker 1: rather have my my rooms a pigstye. It's my pigsty
Speaker 1: But that's when I feel like like my house every
Speaker 1: time there's there's been so many times where I'm sitting
Speaker 1: and I have so much ship everywhere, and I know that,
Speaker 1: like you think, I probably never cleaned it up ship
Speaker 1: because of you, but I'm now realizing, like my awareness
Speaker 1: that you would always come home was always there was
Speaker 1: something in me that was like clean up a little bit,
Speaker 1: don't be a total slab, put on some pants, stuff
Speaker 1: like that. But every time a churst to me, there's
Speaker 1: a sadness where I go, oh, I guess I don't
Speaker 1: have to pump pants. I guess I can just keep
Speaker 1: eating like a slob, and like there's no accountability and
Speaker 1: you could slide into sadness pretty quick, which is great.
Speaker 1: While I'm so glad I'm doing this podcast with you
Speaker 1: every day from my hotel room because I'm I've guaranteed
Speaker 1: company coming over every day. And coming. I like, how
Speaker 1: great is our relationship not living together? It's very good.
Speaker 1: I mean. The only thing I'm wanting more of, which
Speaker 1: we didn't get a chance to do, is you and
Speaker 1: Brenda coming over and like hanging socially. We will And
Speaker 1: you came over, you know, like wept so cute. Yeah,
Speaker 1: then we'll do that once we fall into a groove,
Speaker 1: which I'll never fall into because my life never ends. Um,
Speaker 1: but let's get let's take a short break and let's
Speaker 1: get Andrew. We're back. Hey, Noah, Um, you hung out
Speaker 1: with my parents last week. You're so adorable. Can I
Speaker 1: just say that I was talking to my dad, my
Speaker 1: mom and dad were My mom was nervous about hanging
Speaker 1: out with you, I have to say, because she just
Speaker 1: gets nervous about any like, anyone new, and especially someone
Speaker 1: young and whose friends with me who might judge her,
Speaker 1: like she has to, like, you know, anyone hanging out
Speaker 1: with anyone new is like stressful. Right, we can all agree.
Speaker 1: It's just my mom has those stresses. And I was like,
Speaker 1: Noah loves you. It's gonna be so easy. I swear
Speaker 1: to God, You're gonna be nervous right until you get
Speaker 1: that like hang out and then it's gonna be easy peasy.
Speaker 1: And then I was talking and they both fucking loved you.
Speaker 1: My mom flooded me with texts that drinky poose and
Speaker 1: she was like, going on, I gotta read some of them.
Speaker 1: They're gonna come over where that point. So I went, um,
Speaker 1: hiking with them, and your dad is such a good hiker.
Speaker 1: You look enough like Nikki, but you like hiking like
Speaker 1: you're the daughter they never had. Wish they're They're wonderful parents.
Speaker 1: And we we both got to the parking lot of
Speaker 1: Sabino Canyon at the same time, and I got up
Speaker 1: to the visitor center because I was like our meet
Speaker 1: up spot, and all of a sudden they here, No, No,
Speaker 1: I go, Julie, and we just kind of like run
Speaker 1: up to each other and I hugged them and stuff.
Speaker 1: There's They're so funny and I'm really lucky they have
Speaker 1: a great relationship. I like, I wish I had parents
Speaker 1: like that to model after everyone has witness Yeah, because
Speaker 1: I just want to say to you. My mom said,
Speaker 1: I know you are, I said, um, she wrote me up.
Speaker 1: She was a little bit I think I had a
Speaker 1: couple of drinks and so she was texting me like crazy,
Speaker 1: and she's like, um uh, you know, I was going uh.
Speaker 1: She said, I hope Jonah is okay in Tonga, which,
Speaker 1: by the way, that is a reference to Summer Heights High.
Speaker 1: Jonah is a character on that show that lives in
Speaker 1: New Zealand. And she was reading about the volcano and Tonga,
Speaker 1: and so she said, I hope a character is okay
Speaker 1: in Tonga and I said okay. I said, ha, and
Speaker 1: she goes, I know you are in l a met
Speaker 1: up with Noah. She loves you and us. She's so cute.
Speaker 1: We better see her before we leave watching Brittany Murphy Dock.
Speaker 1: What a sad world she lived in her fucking husband Simon.
Speaker 1: I'm just glad you never fell for a Simon, I said,
Speaker 1: Simon is so disgusting. I love Noah. She goes, ha,
Speaker 1: ha ha, you are so hip to what's going on, stylist,
Speaker 1: try on tomorrow. And then she goes, by the way,
Speaker 1: Noah loves you too. Have you met av I said, yes,
Speaker 1: he's so nice. She said, we're going to meet him.
Speaker 1: No one wants us to come over to her house.
Speaker 1: That's so cute. And then she talked a lot of ship.
Speaker 1: But um, no, no, no, what did you notice about
Speaker 1: the relationship that maybe I'm missing out on because I'm jaded.
Speaker 1: And you know, one, your dad is a leader because
Speaker 1: although because I thought I was going to have to
Speaker 1: figure out like the hiking trail at Sabino, but he
Speaker 1: knew them all and he was the one who led us.
Speaker 1: Your parents are very adventurous. They told me about their
Speaker 1: trip to Alaska and now there in Tucson, and I
Speaker 1: just think it's it's great that they traveled together and
Speaker 1: do all that stuff. Um, and your dad is so sweet.
Speaker 1: There was this woman who was mountain biking with her
Speaker 1: kids and she had no idea what she was doing.
Speaker 1: And the kid fell off the bike and your dad
Speaker 1: helped him up and he helped him fix the bike
Speaker 1: chain and stuff, and he kind of like gave him
Speaker 1: advice on on what to do. It's very sweet. Okay,
Speaker 1: I like it. No, I I love this trip for them,
Speaker 1: you know, for the listener does not. My parents just
Speaker 1: decided to go to Tucson, Arizona for the months because
Speaker 1: they have a friend who has a house there that
Speaker 1: gave them like a deal on an airbnb situation. And
Speaker 1: they're there the whole month, and um, I love them
Speaker 1: being somewhere where they're just living their best life and
Speaker 1: they're not working, and my mom's not constantly rattled by
Speaker 1: like cleaning and figuring out, you know, bills and stuff.
Speaker 1: It's just it's nice to have them on an extended
Speaker 1: vacation where I'm like, oh, man, I want them to
Speaker 1: have I want everyone to have that kind of life. Eventually,
Speaker 1: before your parents left, they were talking to me and uh,
Speaker 1: oh yeah, and your mom. Your mom was like, goddamn,
Speaker 1: e J's inviting after this, God damn, we got this
Speaker 1: house and e J Is having so many goddamn guests.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna have to clean and cook and entertain. I
Speaker 1: don't even And then true, they have had They didn't
Speaker 1: have time to call me about Bob Saget because they
Speaker 1: were so preoccupied with guests. The jazz festival in town
Speaker 1: and they basically had a bunch of jazz musicians hang
Speaker 1: out and stay with them. Yes, that's how cool your
Speaker 1: parents are. My dad's best friend is a jazz musician
Speaker 1: named Steve Schmidt, who's really, you know, popular famous jazz
Speaker 1: musician in um Cincinnati. And so they came out and
Speaker 1: went to the jazz festival. I don't think he played
Speaker 1: in it, but um yeah, my parents are cool as fun.
Speaker 1: There's just no doubt if you have a friend that
Speaker 1: plays jazz who comes out and just is like, hey,
Speaker 1: you mind if I put my oboe over there? And
Speaker 1: the friend John Vester is famous in um Finland, Denmark.
Speaker 1: He's a musician, John vest He lives in Venice, California,
Speaker 1: but he's super famous. He bought a place on like
Speaker 1: right off the Venice boardwalk in like the nineteen seventies
Speaker 1: and so he has this That's where I lived when
Speaker 1: I first moved to l I lived in his spare
Speaker 1: bedroom on right Venice board walk with my that's best
Speaker 1: friend from high school who just is just like this
Speaker 1: like kind of hippie ish dude. And and he's famous
Speaker 1: in Denmark. It's so interesting when people are famous. He's
Speaker 1: not from Denmark. They just picked him up there like
Speaker 1: that sugarman. Yeah in South Africa and never knew that's wild.
Speaker 1: Maybe I'm famous in like um, you know, Jersey, Yeah,
Speaker 1: something crazy. It is interesting to look at your stats
Speaker 1: of like where people on Instagram are your fans? Like
Speaker 1: three in Australia. What's up, guys from well place? I didn't.
Speaker 1: I don't know. I think that sounds like a metal band.
Speaker 1: Um wait, have you watched No, but your parents were
Speaker 1: telling me about it? Um? Okay, yeah, I've gotten some
Speaker 1: best seas into it and and uh Andrew obviously watched
Speaker 1: it way before I even finished it. I've watched it
Speaker 1: twice now. I love it so much. I just want
Speaker 1: to reinforce that it's really good and everyone should watch
Speaker 1: it's it's on HBO Max, and you should definitely watch
Speaker 1: it with in Finnish like that's I think Danish. No,
Speaker 1: it's Danish, like John Vester might be all over that thing. Um,
Speaker 1: you should watch it in Danish and then have the
Speaker 1: subtitles on. But if you watch the first episode, be
Speaker 1: warned that at the end there is a text message
Speaker 1: that they do not translate, and you can just google
Speaker 1: what does the text message say at the end of
Speaker 1: the episode. But please do not do any research about
Speaker 1: what this show is about before you watch it. Just
Speaker 1: put it on and watch it, or watch it with
Speaker 1: English like, um, but you they're really good with English.
Speaker 1: And I was recommended be to someone who watched it
Speaker 1: in English Um, I'm also I reached out to the
Speaker 1: girl from Kama Kaze. Her name is Marie Maria Ruther,
Speaker 1: the one that got hurt in Tonka. No, no, that's character.
Speaker 1: I mean I matched with him, but I once Chris
Speaker 1: Lily's a different character could be worried about. Well, she
Speaker 1: should be worried about what's her name from the show. Um,
Speaker 1: I've reached So I posted about Comacaze on my Instagram
Speaker 1: story and Marie Ruther from the show d m me
Speaker 1: heart eyes emoji, being like, thank you for posting, and
Speaker 1: I go, girl, thank you for bringing this character to
Speaker 1: my life. You are insanely good. And now we're Instagram
Speaker 1: friends and it's just so fun. Another show I'm so
Speaker 1: into right now, After Life. Yeah, I've watched the first
Speaker 1: two seasons, so the third one just came out. I'm
Speaker 1: getting through the second season. I'm on the third episode
Speaker 1: of second season's let's do that. Um boy, that show
Speaker 1: is great. No, have you seen Afterlife? Yeah? I watched
Speaker 1: the first season. I have to catch up. Ricky Gervais
Speaker 1: is I know he's been on you up before when
Speaker 1: we had it on Serious. He is so awesome and
Speaker 1: I was reading about him last night. Did you know
Speaker 1: he was a singer and in a band, like a
Speaker 1: pop singer before he was a comedian. He also worked
Speaker 1: in a regular office like he did. Yeah. Yeah, he
Speaker 1: didn't start like he didn't blow up until his forties,
Speaker 1: like yeah, and he had all that he had all
Speaker 1: that stuff to write about because he actually worked in
Speaker 1: Like that was based off kind of a true story.
Speaker 1: I like how the Afterlife kind of is like the Office.
Speaker 1: They have an office setting. But Afterlife is on Netflix
Speaker 1: if you haven't checked it out yet. I can't recommend
Speaker 1: that enough either. That is a totally different kind of
Speaker 1: tone of a show than Kama Kaze. But um, it's
Speaker 1: so good show. The acting on that show. Every single
Speaker 1: character is fucking brilliant. The funniest character is the psychiatrist,
Speaker 1: who is also in Game of Thrones. I mean, all
Speaker 1: of these people are. Every British actor is in Game
Speaker 1: of Thrones. I realized. Which is the show I haven't seen,
Speaker 1: even though I know it would probably be one of
Speaker 1: my faiths like Australians. And did you read that New
Speaker 1: Yorker piece about Jeremy Strong Kendall from Succession? So it's
Speaker 1: all about how serious of an actor he is. It's
Speaker 1: pretty good. I'll send it to you. It was. It
Speaker 1: got a lot of headlines when it came out. So
Speaker 1: there's this New Yorker article about Jeremy Strong who's plays
Speaker 1: Kendall in Succession, and it's all about how his acting
Speaker 1: process and he's very method, meaning like he's in it
Speaker 1: and wants to he makes everyone else's lives miserable to
Speaker 1: get the role right. And if you're watching Curb this year,
Speaker 1: he's almost kind of like that guy on Curb that
Speaker 1: player plays young Larry who wants to like have the
Speaker 1: perfect classes and everything. And it's like, you read this
Speaker 1: and you're like, this guy's obnxius. It was interesting though,
Speaker 1: because I was reading what did I read? That means? Um? I?
Speaker 1: I was reading the a New York timespeaks about Kathy
Speaker 1: Griffin and about her comeback who I'm a huge Kathy
Speaker 1: Griffin fan and always will be. And after she got
Speaker 1: she said, I wasn't canceled after the Trump mask thing.
Speaker 1: I was ruined. And they try it and she was
Speaker 1: like she couldn't work. But she was talking about coming
Speaker 1: back from that and how and they were talking about
Speaker 1: in the article how women when they have similar so
Speaker 1: everyone came so the article about Jeremy Strong was not
Speaker 1: it didn't paint him in a good light. Some of
Speaker 1: his uh you know, co stars were like, yeah, it's annoying.
Speaker 1: He's annoying, Brian Cox, you know, the places, his father.
Speaker 1: It's like it's a whole thing with him and um.
Speaker 1: And then after it came out and everyone's kind of
Speaker 1: making fun of them, all these people, Aaron Sorkin, all
Speaker 1: these people come out and say, like, we support him.
Speaker 1: He's an actor, Like he has nothing to be ashamed of,
Speaker 1: Like that's just the way he is. He's not an asshole,
Speaker 1: all this stuff. And then they were comparing that to
Speaker 1: like when a woman acts. If a woman were to
Speaker 1: act the way Jeremy Strong acts on set, it's very
Speaker 1: interesting to play that out and see how that would
Speaker 1: be accepted, because I don't think it would be. And
Speaker 1: I think that, well, what was like what was I'm
Speaker 1: just trying to wrap my head about, like specifically, like
Speaker 1: what does he do that? Does he just obviously doesn't
Speaker 1: break character, but is he does he act like an
Speaker 1: asshole and be like, well, that's the character he does
Speaker 1: anything to get the role. He calls people to like
Speaker 1: he he's calculating and how he gets roles and how
Speaker 1: he falls up with people. He's really talented. But he
Speaker 1: you know, he made kind of a connection with Chris
Speaker 1: Evans back in like his theater camp days, and so
Speaker 1: he emailed him and like tried to get through his
Speaker 1: agent like just I kind of that. But there was
Speaker 1: just something about, you know, I'm not doing a good
Speaker 1: job of painting it. But um, I was reading the
Speaker 1: subreddit and the thing about the Kathy Griffin, Then can
Speaker 1: I explain what happened? Which is kind of interesting. So
Speaker 1: we all know she's no Cathy separate from the strong one.
Speaker 1: So the Kathy Griffin incident happened because she he had
Speaker 1: just said that thing about Megan Kelly where there was
Speaker 1: blood coming out of everything, and he was kind of
Speaker 1: commenting about her being on her period under that um
Speaker 1: and so she was doing a photo shoot and they
Speaker 1: went to the Halloween sort of get a mask of
Speaker 1: Trump and they put a like the star. They put
Speaker 1: it in like one of the styrofoam wig things, so
Speaker 1: it was filled out and then they were like, we'll
Speaker 1: put blood on it because he said blood coming out
Speaker 1: of everything. And then of course it looks like a
Speaker 1: Severn head. But it was in the context of that line,
Speaker 1: which you know later on, completely out of context, and
Speaker 1: she did and she was investigated by the Secret Service
Speaker 1: for wanting to like decapitate the press. I mean, it
Speaker 1: was ridiculous and it was just and he sicked his yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean they're both redheads. Oh yeah. Anyway, I just
Speaker 1: she's just so cool, I through so much. I just
Speaker 1: really admire her. But I also like Jeremy Strong, Like
Speaker 1: there was nothing about it that made me go, he's
Speaker 1: an asshole. I just thought it was interesting. Like I
Speaker 1: don't know, I think like when you have someone like
Speaker 1: just a visual like so much of the things like
Speaker 1: where people you know, if it's a story of Jeremy
Speaker 1: Strong being a dick, but if it was caught on
Speaker 1: video right out of context of Jeremy Strong like throwing
Speaker 1: coffee on someone's face and being like that's the character,
Speaker 1: you know, like or whatever, you know, then it changes everything.
Speaker 1: Like if you just heard that it did a really
Speaker 1: bad job, because honestly, but I just remember people making
Speaker 1: a thing of it and then everyone came to his defense,
Speaker 1: and I just I'm not trying to play the if
Speaker 1: it was a man card because I know that some
Speaker 1: women can be divas and people like really respect that
Speaker 1: about them. But I just tend to notice that when
Speaker 1: if women like have like a way they do things,
Speaker 1: and it just I mean, even with this situation with
Speaker 1: this hotel room, I don't love it, and I want
Speaker 1: to switch to a better one, and I know there's
Speaker 1: some money in the budget to get me a better one,
Speaker 1: but I don't want that to be a thing that
Speaker 1: HBO and like everyone knows about me is like Nikki is.
Speaker 1: I don't want to be a diva ever. I don't
Speaker 1: want to be a nag. I don't want to be
Speaker 1: a lot. I don't want to be a tease. I
Speaker 1: don't want to be da What are other things women
Speaker 1: don't want to be? What do you not want to be? You?
Speaker 1: You don't want to be a pussy a creep? Men
Speaker 1: don't want to be pussy, but I have. I mean,
Speaker 1: I'm kind of like with you on this stuff, like
Speaker 1: for me to ask for a better fucking very similar
Speaker 1: in a way. But also but there are people that
Speaker 1: just think they deserve it and they don't care like
Speaker 1: how people perceive it. Like I'm not one of those people,
Speaker 1: Like I asked for a little bit more money than
Speaker 1: what they offered me for this, and that was a
Speaker 1: huge and I didn't get it, but I was happy
Speaker 1: that I did it, and uh, you know, and it
Speaker 1: wasn't like crazy amount of money. And then I was,
Speaker 1: you know, my thing that was like if I was
Speaker 1: on Shark thing. I was like, and they're like, well,
Speaker 1: we'll give you four percent. I'll be like, you know what, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: but that's what I would do. Like I'm not really like,
Speaker 1: but I'm glad that I did it, But yes, I
Speaker 1: see your point. But maybe there's a room in the
Speaker 1: building similar prize in a different area, and honestly, I'd
Speaker 1: be willing to pay the extra like there with my
Speaker 1: HBO special right now, I am. It's been pushed like
Speaker 1: the air date has been pushed four months because I
Speaker 1: didn't get that at it done in time because I'm
Speaker 1: just being tune, nitpicky about it. And you know, they
Speaker 1: have a certain budget allocated for like this is how
Speaker 1: much money we can spend on editing this, and I'm
Speaker 1: blowing past that severely because I just wanted to be
Speaker 1: great and it's just not yet to me, and it
Speaker 1: really has the potential to be and I wrote in
Speaker 1: the email to the guy yesterday, I'm like, I I
Speaker 1: got a really good song for it that I've wanted forever.
Speaker 1: And it costs like thirty dollars, which is what any
Speaker 1: song that you would recognize or any that you wouldn't
Speaker 1: even recognize the song, but it's what it costs. And
Speaker 1: I said, um, you know, I'll pay my own money
Speaker 1: for extra editing. I just want this to be great.
Speaker 1: I think it could win an Emmy and I just
Speaker 1: want um. Or we could just get rid of the
Speaker 1: song and I could literally like we could do a
Speaker 1: sound alike that will cost five dollars, you know. So
Speaker 1: I'm but it's interesting when people ask for more, like
Speaker 1: I was, what did you say it? He has written
Speaker 1: me back out, but in the Cathy Griffin article, this
Speaker 1: is what freaked me out. So this is what frayed
Speaker 1: her relationship with CNNU long before the mask incident. So
Speaker 1: she called I think it's I forget who was the
Speaker 1: president of NBC at the time, like Jeff Zucker or
Speaker 1: something like that, And she called him like ten days
Speaker 1: before she was supposed to do Christmas Eve CNN with
Speaker 1: Anderson Cooper and or New Year's Eve, Christmas Eve, the
Speaker 1: count down to Christmas Eve. They're just counting like the
Speaker 1: five the twelve days of Christmas. So she was called
Speaker 1: Jeff Zucker, No, you'll love this too, because I was
Speaker 1: thinking of you, because you're You're really good when it
Speaker 1: comes to like stepping up and trying negotiate and fight
Speaker 1: for yourself if you think you deserve it. And she
Speaker 1: said to him, I want, uh, this much more money
Speaker 1: because I think Anderson's making that and I want this
Speaker 1: much more money and or and he thought it was
Speaker 1: a threat that she would walk if she didn't get it,
Speaker 1: so he said, well, you're fired. I don't I'm not.
Speaker 1: I don't take threats like, don't threaten me with this.
Speaker 1: And he fired her, and then she apologized, and then
Speaker 1: she hired her again and then gave her less than
Speaker 1: she was making before. And yeah, but this bitch like
Speaker 1: Kathy Griffin. The reason she I resonate with her when
Speaker 1: she says I hate when people say I resonate. She
Speaker 1: resonates with me when she says that she never sought
Speaker 1: out to be someone who was offensive or who like
Speaker 1: had people hate her. I mean, we all get into
Speaker 1: this because we want to be loved and yet she
Speaker 1: But then you just get into it and you realize
Speaker 1: the hypocrisy and like how much bullshit there is, and
Speaker 1: you're just like fuck it, Like I just wanna I
Speaker 1: you know, if people are gonna not like me, that's fine.
Speaker 1: Like I read a you did I say that. I
Speaker 1: read a YouTube comment the other day under one of
Speaker 1: my most popular videos. I accidentally read it because it
Speaker 1: was there, and it was nice because it said this
Speaker 1: is as nice as it can get from me, by
Speaker 1: the way, when it isn't a bustie. It said, god, admit,
Speaker 1: she kind of killed this one. Guys, that is all
Speaker 1: they're gonna give me. So what they were doing was
Speaker 1: writing in response to all the hate. And I constantly
Speaker 1: get guys telling me like, oh my god, your YouTube
Speaker 1: comments do not represent how we feel about you, and
Speaker 1: I'm like, I didn't, I don't read them, so tell
Speaker 1: me that. But you know, it's people. The more people
Speaker 1: that know you, the more people are gonna hate you.
Speaker 1: It's just the way it goes. And I am getting
Speaker 1: so good at being okay with that. I'm so grateful
Speaker 1: that my fame has come in gentle waves and ebbed
Speaker 1: and flowed and because I would not have been able
Speaker 1: to handle this when I was in my twenties of
Speaker 1: people having opinions about me and making fun of me
Speaker 1: or like you know, just and you're you know, uh.
Speaker 1: There was like a podcast that some people were making
Speaker 1: fun of me on recently, and it was like my
Speaker 1: peers like people that I'm you know, not friends with,
Speaker 1: but comedy acquaintances, and they're like trashing me on it.
Speaker 1: And it's all like good nature trashing. They're not saying,
Speaker 1: they're not like it. It's not the kind of stuff.
Speaker 1: I wouldn't be able to see them and be like, oh,
Speaker 1: that was nice, you know. I texted some of them
Speaker 1: about it. But it is interesting when you get to
Speaker 1: a certain level of fame. If I were nobody, they
Speaker 1: wouldn't be talking about this, you know they would. But
Speaker 1: because I met a certain level of fame, you become
Speaker 1: a part of the like everyone could comment on it,
Speaker 1: like I had. I have a bit about I say
Speaker 1: Pete Davidson's name in my special. I am now able
Speaker 1: to comment on Pete Davidson's personal life in my special.
Speaker 1: He's someone I was because he's not famous, I'm able
Speaker 1: to come And then another night I was going to
Speaker 1: Supernova in l A, which a lot of bestie showed
Speaker 1: up to those shows thank you so much because they
Speaker 1: emailed uh Noah or Carla, and Mulaney was supposed to
Speaker 1: show up this weekend. He didn't because of whatever reason.
Speaker 1: But um I, I didn't want to go to one
Speaker 1: of the shows because it was after I found out
Speaker 1: this podcast was talking about me, and I'm like, all
Speaker 1: the comics are talking about me. Everyone's laughing behind my
Speaker 1: back to Da Da Da Da, and it was about
Speaker 1: the Bob Sagget song. They're just saying that. I was
Speaker 1: like cringe and it was cringe, and I admit, like
Speaker 1: there's cringe. There's cringe things about being sincere and it's fine,
Speaker 1: like I predicted it, But um I was just like
Speaker 1: in the state of mind where it's like I just
Speaker 1: heard all these nasty things about me. Howard Stern made
Speaker 1: fun of me and was like this is the kind
Speaker 1: of thing like Nikki would make fun of Like what
Speaker 1: is she even talking about? And I was just feeling like, oh,
Speaker 1: everyone's like listen to this behind my back and they're
Speaker 1: probably like texting each other and making fun of me,
Speaker 1: which could be true on some scale. I'm not like completely,
Speaker 1: I'm not thinking everyone, but I didn't want to go
Speaker 1: to the show because I'm just like, I'm gonna see
Speaker 1: other comics and they're gonna be like snickering. And then
Speaker 1: I was like, wait a second, John Mulaney might show
Speaker 1: up to the show. John Mulaney, who I read speculation
Speaker 1: about his personal life. I went on the Daily Mail
Speaker 1: to seconds, like a second before I was leaving to go,
Speaker 1: and I see pictures of him and Sarah Silverman walking
Speaker 1: the reser war in him holding his baby. I'm like,
Speaker 1: everyone is following him and commenting on his life. How
Speaker 1: must he feel showing up tonight knowing that his acquaintance
Speaker 1: Nikki Glazers probably mouthed off on many podcasts about his
Speaker 1: personal life, knowing nothing about it. And it's kind of
Speaker 1: what you sign up for. And I'm not saying that
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna stop talking and commenting on celebrities lives
Speaker 1: because but what I'm gonna do is except that mine
Speaker 1: is commentable too, and I'm able to be mocked by
Speaker 1: other comedians and it's okay because I know who I am,
Speaker 1: I know where, I know why I do things, and
Speaker 1: the thing about that making fun of me for the
Speaker 1: Bob Saget song on this podcast, Like, first of all,
Speaker 1: they're not wrong. It is a little cringe being like
Speaker 1: that Sincere and Sacharin. It's so cringe. What I don't
Speaker 1: care about it, though, is that I didn't put out
Speaker 1: that song so I could get attention, so that I
Speaker 1: could I know in my deepest heart of hearts that
Speaker 1: I wasn't like, look how close I am with Bob.
Speaker 1: If anything, I'm like, I don't, I'm not. We We're
Speaker 1: only we weren't that good of Like I feel guilty.
Speaker 1: I've said it on this podcast. I'm guilty. We weren't
Speaker 1: that good of fronts. I wasn't trying to get attention
Speaker 1: for it. I wasn't trying to make myself more famous
Speaker 1: because of it. I was just putting something out there
Speaker 1: that reflected how I felt. I would never have done
Speaker 1: it had I not already been in a recording studio
Speaker 1: recording songs that I never intended to release, which I
Speaker 1: could even prove that I wasn't gonna attend to release
Speaker 1: them with multiple conversations I had. I was paying thousands
Speaker 1: of dollars just to do this thing that I wanted
Speaker 1: to do for fun, and that's why it happened. Um.
Speaker 1: And also my final thought about this is that because
Speaker 1: no matter what other people say, you're doing something for
Speaker 1: because I think I didn't listen to their thing, but
Speaker 1: I think they just said it was cringe and that
Speaker 1: it's like Nikki thinks she's like sweet, she doesn't sound
Speaker 1: that good whatever it was, and them saying, I know
Speaker 1: what I would say if someone commented this, let me
Speaker 1: just say that is that they're trying to get attention.
Speaker 1: They're trying to be like I was so close with
Speaker 1: this famous person. I know I wasn't doing that. That's
Speaker 1: all I need. That's all that needs to I don't
Speaker 1: need to prove that to anyone, which I could, because
Speaker 1: I have proof that I've talked about not being that
Speaker 1: close with them. So obviously I'm not trying to pretend
Speaker 1: like I was. I just was feeling something and that's
Speaker 1: all that it was. It wasn't And if my motivations
Speaker 1: were anything other than that, I would feel it would
Speaker 1: have stuck with me that they made fun of me,
Speaker 1: because they would have nailed it. You know. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: remember even before, like you know, people like commented on
Speaker 1: and you're like should I post this because it feels
Speaker 1: like I'm promoting like you felt weird about it to me.
Speaker 1: I remember also, it's like part of me is like
Speaker 1: you've matured in a way where you can be since
Speaker 1: here and you've removed yourself from this toxic situation. That's
Speaker 1: that Isn't these uh comedy communities that if you're not
Speaker 1: the most toxic, you're not you're not being real or
Speaker 1: you're not being edgy. You know, it's not edgy always
Speaker 1: being edgy exactly. Let me just say that the definition
Speaker 1: of edginess to me and actually pushing the boundaries is
Speaker 1: doing things that are risky for you because they might
Speaker 1: make you look stupid, they might make you look foolish,
Speaker 1: they might make you look weak, but you want to
Speaker 1: say them and do them anyway. Comics who are live
Speaker 1: on the edge and whose main objective is always to
Speaker 1: say the most offensive thing and make fun of everything,
Speaker 1: there's nothing risky about it. Maybe the first time you
Speaker 1: went on stage and did that act where you're like,
Speaker 1: say the most offensive thing, maybe that was a risk.
Speaker 1: But once you have a fan base, there ain't nothing
Speaker 1: risky about going on a podcast. And granted I like
Speaker 1: these guys that make fun of me. They're so funny,
Speaker 1: and I like I like offensive humor. I like this,
Speaker 1: you know, I like that type of humor. That's how
Speaker 1: I started in comedy, was like saying the worst thing. Obviously,
Speaker 1: my rose chokes are you know, representative of that, and
Speaker 1: a lot of my stand up act. But the thing
Speaker 1: I look, what comedy doesn't give me anymore, and doing
Speaker 1: those offensive jokes used to give me was a thrill
Speaker 1: that I might piss someone off and they might hate
Speaker 1: me forever, and it might ruin me. It might make
Speaker 1: me look stupid. I might say something that's out of
Speaker 1: line that challenges the way someone thinks. They're not challenging
Speaker 1: anyone anymore. They have their legion of fans who agree
Speaker 1: with anything they say. There is nothing they're putting out
Speaker 1: there anymore that is ever going to make them look
Speaker 1: stupid or embarrassed or there's no risk anymore. And I'm
Speaker 1: not saying that it's I still think that it's valid
Speaker 1: to have that kind of comedy out there. It doesn't
Speaker 1: mean like every comedy, all comedy has to be risky.
Speaker 1: But what I did and what I'm doing with music
Speaker 1: is so embarrassing. It is the level of this is
Speaker 1: going to get me? It is because it's going to
Speaker 1: it makes me Doing Dancing with the Stars was also
Speaker 1: another thing. I'm not saying I'm the best at this,
Speaker 1: but at least I took a fucking chance on something
Speaker 1: I wanted to do because it felt good but might
Speaker 1: have made me look so dumb and did because I've
Speaker 1: got first this thing that I sincerely tried, I failed
Speaker 1: terribly at I've looked more stupid than these guys have
Speaker 1: so much more and to me, and I'm not even
Speaker 1: the one doing the more, there are people that do
Speaker 1: this more than I even do it. But to me,
Speaker 1: being an edgy comic is the safest ship going and
Speaker 1: we need to start acknowledging that because what really is
Speaker 1: edgy and what is like, you know, is doing things
Speaker 1: that might make you look dumb and like you dancing
Speaker 1: in the supermarket. Someone like made said something about like
Speaker 1: Nikki went from being like a great stand up to
Speaker 1: now you're posting pictures like video of this guy dancing
Speaker 1: a supermarket. You dance like a little spastic ballerina in
Speaker 1: a fucking aisle. You tell me that is comedy, You
Speaker 1: askhole that is funnier than any one liner I could
Speaker 1: have written on Twitter or some like sweet TikTok I
Speaker 1: could have made of like when you go to the
Speaker 1: supermarket and you can't find the time, Like how many
Speaker 1: times I watched that original and laughed in bed last
Speaker 1: night when I couldn't sleep, like thirty five times? And
Speaker 1: how that, to me is way riskier than saying some
Speaker 1: like line about like race or trans rights or whatever
Speaker 1: the forward like someone's mom. It's just like my thing too?
Speaker 1: Is that? Like it's like if I and I know
Speaker 1: we have to get the news, but like if your
Speaker 1: fan base attacks the person you make fun of, not
Speaker 1: in a comical way, but in the most harsh and
Speaker 1: egregious way to really rip at them and make them
Speaker 1: feel horrible about themselves, and you don't fucking tell your
Speaker 1: audience like, hey, look, we agree that this is funny,
Speaker 1: but attacking other people outside of us in a in
Speaker 1: a in a way where they flood the troll and
Speaker 1: it's fucking it's whatever, you're fucking trolls, you're rady? Do
Speaker 1: they blood my comments on the sac video comment on
Speaker 1: on our YouTube page? Like a hundred of them and
Speaker 1: maybe even more. It's oh, I got so many messages
Speaker 1: on Twitter like, where's your Louis Anderson song, where's your
Speaker 1: you know, Robert dust song, Where's It's just like, it's
Speaker 1: gonna follow me for a while, and but I'm going
Speaker 1: to have to I'm gonna put out an album and
Speaker 1: actually have success, and I'll get made fun of so
Speaker 1: much for I have so many more things up my
Speaker 1: sleep that are gonna be embarrassing. Bring it on. These
Speaker 1: fucking pussies that comments the ship. They would never do
Speaker 1: anything that would ever make them look a little bit
Speaker 1: stupid in the name of being sincere and putting out
Speaker 1: actual feelings. And the second one of these guys heroes parishes,
Speaker 1: God forbid, Let's see if they don't fucking do something
Speaker 1: a little bit sweet. And and by the way, the way,
Speaker 1: anyone who is listening to these guys thinking they are
Speaker 1: like so brave and don't give a fuck, and they don't.
Speaker 1: They don't try at all. Look at what they're wearing,
Speaker 1: look at the outfits they wear, look at the gloves
Speaker 1: they have on. They think about what they look like
Speaker 1: and how they appear all the time. So do I
Speaker 1: I'm not. I'm just saying it bugs me that they
Speaker 1: came after me. It hurt my feelings. It made me
Speaker 1: feel stupid. It made me feel exactly how I knew
Speaker 1: I was going to feel and how like I predicted
Speaker 1: I was going to feel. It's embarrassing to be made
Speaker 1: fun of. It just is, especially by comedians who's like
Speaker 1: comedy respect. There's a way to be sincere in like
Speaker 1: this their fan base whatever. They're like, oh, we're sincere.
Speaker 1: We actually you know, when we have festivals, we all
Speaker 1: come together and we're so open to love you man,
Speaker 1: and you close every roast with I love you man,
Speaker 1: You're like my brother. But but there's like a way
Speaker 1: that they do sincerity where it's still like manly and edgy.
Speaker 1: It's like I love my baby son. I taught him
Speaker 1: how to shoot a gun and kill his first rabbit,
Speaker 1: and then we ate it together right out there on
Speaker 1: the woods, you know, and it's like, wow, man, you
Speaker 1: fucking have some heart. But if it was like you know,
Speaker 1: I don't know, really putting yourself out there, are really
Speaker 1: like just like but then we'll be like, well, you know,
Speaker 1: or like I kissed a man or I blew up.
Speaker 1: It's like, yeah, we understand this, but you're it doesn't
Speaker 1: mean that you're fan base. Don't attack people, and like,
Speaker 1: because I I interpreted it completely here we are talking
Speaker 1: about it. Yeah, no, no, no, I wanted to know
Speaker 1: what so I watched it and like, your song was
Speaker 1: the impetus for like one of the funniest moments they've
Speaker 1: had on their podcast, which was the tribute song that
Speaker 1: Jay and the guy from the comedy Jam wrote, but
Speaker 1: it was about Bob Sagett so and it had nothing
Speaker 1: really to do. They wrote like a mock song. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so they're like, okay, well this inspired us to write
Speaker 1: our own songs, and Lewis wrote a song, a parody
Speaker 1: song about meeting Bob Saggen in the green room at
Speaker 1: Skankfest and Bob Sagen not knowing who he was. Two
Speaker 1: Tears in Heaven. And then Jay and Adam wrote a
Speaker 1: song um like a like a metal song, the Lincoln
Speaker 1: Park Song, and then they did like a thing that
Speaker 1: Corn did anyway, Yeah, and it was it was really funny.
Speaker 1: It's like, it is funny. I would probably be making
Speaker 1: fun of me too, but I'm just getting defensive because
Speaker 1: I'm me. But I will say that, like the there,
Speaker 1: I don't mind what they did as much as like
Speaker 1: what their fans did. Of course, like I like, but
Speaker 1: I didn't think they are terrified of looking like pussies
Speaker 1: never or or being vulnerable and really almost looking sincere
Speaker 1: like or or being made fun I mean I would
Speaker 1: be terrified being made fun of too, if all my
Speaker 1: friends constantly were on the lookout to make to call
Speaker 1: me gay and make fun of me like it's just
Speaker 1: and as a comedian, you can't do sincere things. I've
Speaker 1: chosen a profession where I'm going to get made fun
Speaker 1: of and this will haunt me for the rest of
Speaker 1: my life. But I've given a chance to do it again.
Speaker 1: I might have released it under a different name or
Speaker 1: something so that no one could accused me of it,
Speaker 1: but that would have been weird because it's like, why
Speaker 1: is this random person we're singing about? Bob second, But
Speaker 1: and maybe I would have put more jokes in it,
Speaker 1: but the day I recorded it, I wasn't in a
Speaker 1: mood to make jokes, and it just happened. And that's
Speaker 1: just what happened. And you know what, But I think
Speaker 1: that this can be a lesson to everyone because I
Speaker 1: was thinking about how he could make this, like, oh,
Speaker 1: how is this about a larger thing than just myself,
Speaker 1: And it's just you can't control what people think about you.
Speaker 1: And if you know what your own intentions are and
Speaker 1: you know who you are, even if someone's calling you racist,
Speaker 1: someone's calling you a diva, someone's calling you a bit,
Speaker 1: someone's calling you lazy, if you know someone's calling you fat,
Speaker 1: if you know you don't, you actively don't want to
Speaker 1: be that thing. Maybe you are fat, but you don't
Speaker 1: want to be it. You know that that's it's not
Speaker 1: your fault, and also that it matters what I think.
Speaker 1: Like I remember Rachel Einstein she Um. I remember one
Speaker 1: time she was worried about some person she was working
Speaker 1: with thinking something about her because they knew someone who
Speaker 1: probably would have lied to her about her to them.
Speaker 1: And I was just like Rachel, it just doesn't matter
Speaker 1: because you can't control it. What are you gonna call
Speaker 1: them and say, I think you might have heard this
Speaker 1: thing about me. It's out of your hands, and you
Speaker 1: know that you're not that, And all you have to
Speaker 1: do is just keep living from that place of not
Speaker 1: being the person that they are thinking that you are,
Speaker 1: and it'll catch up. There are so many times I
Speaker 1: have heard things shitty things about people, And I go
Speaker 1: into a situation thinking a person is gonna be one
Speaker 1: way because I've heard rumors, and how quick how easy
Speaker 1: is it to disprove that once you get to know
Speaker 1: a person, and even if you don't get a chance
Speaker 1: to disprove it, Like I'm not going to get a
Speaker 1: chance to make these people like me. They'll never like me,
Speaker 1: these guys and and the haters. But um, I know
Speaker 1: who I am and that's all that matters. And they're
Speaker 1: not affecting my well being. They're not, like, you know,
Speaker 1: hurting me. I'm not reading their comments. My friends and
Speaker 1: family might. But I know even if I did put
Speaker 1: that out to get attention for being friends of Bob
Speaker 1: Tacket and because I wanted anyone hear my cool new
Speaker 1: voice that I think I'm deserved to win in a
Speaker 1: fucking Emmy four um, which is not true. But even
Speaker 1: if that were true, who the funk cares? That's another thing.
Speaker 1: When people like put an Instagram post where you know
Speaker 1: you'll you'll go, Nikki, isn't this guy just trying to
Speaker 1: get attention for this? And I go, even if he is,
Speaker 1: isn't that sad? Shouldn't we just like let that like
Speaker 1: and it's not, that's not I'm not hurting anyone. But
Speaker 1: if I weren't really, like god, I want everyone to
Speaker 1: know I'm so close to Bob Saget and that like
Speaker 1: famous people love me if that were me, it's not.
Speaker 1: It's really in the scheme of things to be a
Speaker 1: bad person. That's not really that bad. It's not true.
Speaker 1: But like even if it were, it's but I know
Speaker 1: who I am. How many people were probably talking about
Speaker 1: Childish Gambino when he was like trying to do like
Speaker 1: R and B music, when he was a stand up comedian.
Speaker 1: I mean, and now he's off to making one of
Speaker 1: the best shows on TV. And I'm not saying people
Speaker 1: will go, well, that's not the same because he's more
Speaker 1: tone like whatever, like you know what I mean. Like
Speaker 1: they have this idea of like yeah, and they want
Speaker 1: to keep everyone in a box because they don't want
Speaker 1: to go outside that box. That box is scary. I
Speaker 1: don't want to step out there. It's so scary to
Speaker 1: potentially look stupid. And that's why I love you. That's
Speaker 1: why I was so attracted to you and your version
Speaker 1: of stand up because you You've taught me to lean
Speaker 1: into that of like who cares if my I'm looking
Speaker 1: in the Instagram and I'm trying to look a little
Speaker 1: bit hot here and it's also funny. It's also funny.
Speaker 1: That's good enough, and maybe I am trying to look
Speaker 1: a little hot because I look good? Who the cares?
Speaker 1: And what if I like, I look like I do
Speaker 1: a silly dance and it's like, I don't know, it's
Speaker 1: just I get comments though, like look there, I I
Speaker 1: lean like, I know, like there's a way of me
Speaker 1: being like, oh, I could just dance down the thing
Speaker 1: and like, but also want to be respected for my jokes,
Speaker 1: you know, because I do think I'm a good joke writer,
Speaker 1: and I do think like I actually can tell a
Speaker 1: story very like whatever, I'm very compelling on stage and
Speaker 1: that I'm I don't just rely on like you more
Speaker 1: than that. And I'm not saying that that's what you think,
Speaker 1: but like, you know, I get comments all the time
Speaker 1: where it's like you're nothing without Nikki, You're you know,
Speaker 1: I know. But even if you read it like but
Speaker 1: I'm saying, no, no, I agree. That's what I tell
Speaker 1: my I do tell myself. I go, look, I actually
Speaker 1: worked eight years or seven years before I even met Nikki.
Speaker 1: I actually like I'm extremely talented on my own, but
Speaker 1: you read that and people from Afar, it's still it
Speaker 1: gets into my brain and like you just got to
Speaker 1: go back to what you can control. And in trying
Speaker 1: to convince people, no, no, no, actually this just keep
Speaker 1: telling good jokes, just keep telling good stories. Keep like
Speaker 1: because you do know you're a good storyteller. You do
Speaker 1: know you're a good comedian. They might not know that
Speaker 1: or see that yet, but you can just keep doing
Speaker 1: it and then it will eventually get out there. They
Speaker 1: might not see it, but it's so funny. Like how
Speaker 1: you come up though, is like how you're perceived. Like
Speaker 1: everyone gets a break from someone else. Everyone can always
Speaker 1: go you wouldn't be anything if you didn't do that
Speaker 1: like I have. There's so many people have helped me
Speaker 1: along the way that they could. And by the way,
Speaker 1: people can say the same thing about I'm nothing without you,
Speaker 1: like what do I have to be? It's the same.
Speaker 1: I feel that way about you sometimes a lot of times. So, um,
Speaker 1: do we have any time for any you know, we
Speaker 1: have to go to a break. Let's come back with
Speaker 1: why do I care? And just cut right to it,
Speaker 1: all right? Why do I care? Why do I care? Uh?
Speaker 1: Let me get to it. Sorry, Oh yeah, I have
Speaker 1: all the swells out there. It's Tuesday, folks. You know
Speaker 1: what that means. But why do I care? Taylor Swift
Speaker 1: fires back and singer Damon Albarn for claiming she doesn't
Speaker 1: write her own songs. Can you listen? It was quote,
Speaker 1: I mean, yeah, I'm I don't even want to comment
Speaker 1: on this. I'm so upset about it in a way
Speaker 1: that you don't think I would be. So. So he goes, Uh,
Speaker 1: she doesn't write around song. So Damon went on to
Speaker 1: say that doesn't count. She co writes most some of them.
Speaker 1: The reporter said, whatever, he goes, that doesn't count. I
Speaker 1: know what co writing is. Co writing is very different
Speaker 1: to writing. I'm not hating on anybody. I'm just saying
Speaker 1: there's a big difference between a songwriter and a songwriter
Speaker 1: who co writes. Doesn't mean the outcome can't be really great.
Speaker 1: That is like not attacking at all. He didn't say
Speaker 1: that she doesn't write some of her songs, but maybe
Speaker 1: she does co write some of them. Does she not
Speaker 1: like does she not like bring in producers for me
Speaker 1: she does write, but he was insinuating. He definitely wasn't
Speaker 1: sinuating that. When it says Co write that she's not
Speaker 1: doing the writing, Is that what you got from it?
Speaker 1: I didn't. I mean absolutely, But the truth of the
Speaker 1: matter is this was This is exactly what we were
Speaker 1: just talking about. I was a little disappointed with her
Speaker 1: reply because she wrote, fuck you bitch, I'll find Oh sorry,
Speaker 1: that was a different quote. Okay, uh, I was way.
Speaker 1: This guy is the was in the band the Gorillas,
Speaker 1: you know, with the z Y. I ain't happy. I'm
Speaker 1: feeling sad he's one of the gorillas. I'm feeling bad.
Speaker 1: I got sunshine. I was such a big fan of
Speaker 1: yours until I saw this. I write all of my
Speaker 1: own songs. Your hot take is completely false and so damaging.
Speaker 1: You don't have to like my songs, but it's really
Speaker 1: fucked up to try and discredit my writing. Wow. And
Speaker 1: then she writes a follow up. She goes, ps, I
Speaker 1: wrote this tweet all by myself. In case you're wondering,
Speaker 1: no Co writing on that tweet. Motherfucker, he's here. Here's
Speaker 1: when I saw that. I first read taylor response before
Speaker 1: I saw his thing, and I thought, this guy must
Speaker 1: have really been really mean, and then I read his quote,
Speaker 1: and I go, we would never hear about this guy's
Speaker 1: quote unless Taylor commented on it. Um. Ever, who is
Speaker 1: reading an article about what the co founder of Guerrillas
Speaker 1: who had a hit in two thousand one says, Andrew,
Speaker 1: you want to scoot up closer? Um? So the only
Speaker 1: reason we know about this, I get it. I get
Speaker 1: this is exactly we're just talking about. When someone says
Speaker 1: something about you that isn't true, and how you respond
Speaker 1: and how um and and how hurtful it can be
Speaker 1: when you know it isn't true and you you perceive
Speaker 1: that maybe a lot of people are saying this about you.
Speaker 1: I gotta be honest, No one thinks Taylor Swift ain't
Speaker 1: writing our songs that girl. I mean, I know, I mean,
Speaker 1: you know what. I don't want to say, no one,
Speaker 1: because it's almost the same thing I was just saying of, Like,
Speaker 1: when one person says something that people can latch onto
Speaker 1: it and then it can be that come the narrative
Speaker 1: about you. But there are so many documented uh you know,
Speaker 1: it's so well documented that Taylor Swift writes literally everything
Speaker 1: she does, and she has a hand in everything. She's
Speaker 1: almost you know, it's almost too much sometimes where you're
Speaker 1: like girl, like she's writing songs for other people, like
Speaker 1: that she should be record on her own. This girl
Speaker 1: is one of the greatest songwriters in the history of
Speaker 1: the world. There's no doubt about that. The fact that
Speaker 1: she got so upset about this hurts me because I'm
Speaker 1: like Taylor, you have nothing to prove anymore. You don't
Speaker 1: need to get mad at this guy because his voice
Speaker 1: means truly nothing. You are so solidified in the annals
Speaker 1: of music history as one of the most prolific singer
Speaker 1: songwriters who will ever exist, right up there with the Beatles,
Speaker 1: like net like with the Beatles. That answering this guy
Speaker 1: is just beneath you. And the fact that he made
Speaker 1: you so upset makes me think, Babe, what's going on?
Speaker 1: Like this? Doesn't you? It makes me feel sad for
Speaker 1: her that she got so upset about this. And but
Speaker 1: don't you think this mindset is the same reason why
Speaker 1: she writes songs. It's the same reason why you write
Speaker 1: and do everything you do, like Yes herself, because this
Speaker 1: guy's life is ruined now for a while because of
Speaker 1: how much her fans hate him, and I just think
Speaker 1: it was I think it was an overreaction fans. Thank
Speaker 1: god for Taylor for reactions I have, But her fans
Speaker 1: are going to go and she'll never once right. Hey,
Speaker 1: you know what, back off, back off. Look, it was
Speaker 1: between me and him. I made this public. It's not
Speaker 1: really you don't have to. I can really agree him
Speaker 1: or whatever you said that about those guys about me.
Speaker 1: It was immediately what I thought about is this. I
Speaker 1: was thought I felt bad for this guy yesterday because
Speaker 1: he followed up with the greatest response ever. And I'm
Speaker 1: on the Taylor Swift subread yesterday. It was like, I
Speaker 1: would never want to discredit you as a songwriter. I
Speaker 1: am so very sorry. I mean, it was a context,
Speaker 1: he said a little bit. It was absolutely they were
Speaker 1: talking about co writers in general. I butt her name
Speaker 1: was thrown into it. They took out any other name
Speaker 1: that was associated in that mix. I'm sure it was
Speaker 1: taken out of context. And the thing is maybe he
Speaker 1: was feeling a little jealous of her and he threw
Speaker 1: under the bus because he was like, I like Billie
Speaker 1: Eilish more than Taylor Swift. He mean, he said a
Speaker 1: couple of other things that were like not nice. So
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be fired up to if I were her.
Speaker 1: She I just it makes you realize there's no one
Speaker 1: that's immune to like feeling really attacked when there's ridicule,
Speaker 1: especially when it puts into question the thing that you
Speaker 1: pride yourself on, the most that no one can take
Speaker 1: from you is that you write your own stuff. Someone
Speaker 1: said that someone else co wrote my jokes, I would
Speaker 1: fucking lose my goddamn you know, like that is what
Speaker 1: really dick for stage time. I was like, Okay, I
Speaker 1: know I didn't do that, but when someone said no,
Speaker 1: men wrote jokes for you, I was like, how fucking
Speaker 1: dare you? And I did blow him for the joke. No.
Speaker 1: But my thing is is like it's also comes like
Speaker 1: you like these guys that were talking ship. She respected
Speaker 1: this guy, so I'm sure she's like, Wow, this guy
Speaker 1: is a great song or however she viewed it. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean, I think it's interesting to say you're a
Speaker 1: fan of someone until they insult you, because does that
Speaker 1: change their music sounds that's a little weird. Yeah. Um,
Speaker 1: I just felt to meditate more. But that's it. But
Speaker 1: I will say that she um I was reading the
Speaker 1: subrite and I thought Taylor fans would be like, that
Speaker 1: was a sincere apology. People cannot fucking apologize anymore. No
Speaker 1: one will take an apology. There's no apology that's ever
Speaker 1: good enough for people. Once they want you, once they
Speaker 1: want to burn you at the stake, you apologize, then
Speaker 1: you're weak, and then they jump on. Epologizing is worse.
Speaker 1: There's nothing you guys open your minds to people apologizing.
Speaker 1: It's so weird and my fans don't need to hear
Speaker 1: this because they're fucking open to it. But I'm just
Speaker 1: like sad about it. Let's get into reddit. Um. It's
Speaker 1: time for Reddit dump karaoke mode. This is your Reddit
Speaker 1: dum um alright, so like, yeah, go pee, I'll stay
Speaker 1: on here and keep this going. Um. So, I wanted
Speaker 1: to play a really funny clip from UM I guess
Speaker 1: magnum p I. Did you see the one? And it's like,
Speaker 1: I don't know if it's gonna go well on audio,
Speaker 1: but you can check it on the video if we
Speaker 1: could put it on. It's magnum p I and he's
Speaker 1: like obviously investigating some kind of crime and it's you know,
Speaker 1: what's his name Tom sellum Selleck, and he's running up
Speaker 1: some stairs and he sees a nun on a ladder
Speaker 1: and he has his gun drawn and he's like searching
Speaker 1: for whoever the suspect is. And he sees a nun
Speaker 1: on a ladder and he kind of looks at the
Speaker 1: nun and she looks back at him, and he's like
Speaker 1: kind of like, oh, okay, she's just a nun. And
Speaker 1: then he he says that, then he runs back up
Speaker 1: the stairs. She says he runs back up the stairs,
Speaker 1: and then he gets a little bit of like a
Speaker 1: suspicion and then all of a sudden, you see her
Speaker 1: from behind pull out a gun. Us don't work up strong,
Speaker 1: And he says to himself right before he realizes that
Speaker 1: the nun. So, the nun is in the background pulling
Speaker 1: out her gun and you can see her about to
Speaker 1: shoot him, and then he like, you know, he just
Speaker 1: kind of thinks to himself, and then right before he
Speaker 1: turns around to see her, he goes, nuns don't work
Speaker 1: on Sunday. Then he turned around and he shoots the
Speaker 1: nun before she's able to shoot him. But it's just
Speaker 1: so funny how like you would never put that together
Speaker 1: and go it's Sunday. Nuns don't work on It's just
Speaker 1: like the dumbest thing at windows. Why would a nun
Speaker 1: nuns don't work? Why is this not on a ladder
Speaker 1: fixing a window like a very high ladder twos like
Speaker 1: thirty ft up? It just made me laugh. Um. That
Speaker 1: was from the subreddit Funny. We have a question for
Speaker 1: Andrew because when I was watching that clip, I was
Speaker 1: has anyone ever said that Tom Selleck and you could
Speaker 1: be related in some way? Here? Wait till you see
Speaker 1: this photo and I think we should post it. Um,
Speaker 1: I'll send you a photo no where I'm very Selicky
Speaker 1: mixed with Ron Jeremy. Oh yeah, you got a little
Speaker 1: bit of round Jeremy. I see that. Um. But on
Speaker 1: the top, no, I see that. No, I see that
Speaker 1: Tom selicks, especially in this last clip, and we just showed. Um.
Speaker 1: This was from True Off my Chest is where people
Speaker 1: just like vent something and this thought made me think
Speaker 1: of you, Andrew. It said, the fact that women's legs
Speaker 1: are naturally hairy to me is such a mind fuck.
Speaker 1: My dislike of hairy legs on a woman feels so
Speaker 1: natural to me, but it isn't it's a socially impost preference,
Speaker 1: and it I had been born any time before, the
Speaker 1: women would be all walking around with hairy legs and
Speaker 1: men wouldn't give a ship because it would be normal.
Speaker 1: It's hard for me to believe my preference for hairless
Speaker 1: legs is a social construct because it doesn't feel that way,
Speaker 1: even though it is. It makes me wonder what other
Speaker 1: aspects of myself that I believe are inherent are actually not.
Speaker 1: Um Andrew, you feel the same way about women's hair
Speaker 1: on their legs, don't lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna say that if I if so, Brando might not
Speaker 1: shave her legs during the winter, and or like she
Speaker 1: lets them grow a little bit like there, they do
Speaker 1: feel a little tarantula, but not fully. You said the
Speaker 1: look of ankle hair on a woman's leg could make
Speaker 1: you unattracted to her, But a woman with fully grown
Speaker 1: out leg hair, it does not help my penis stay
Speaker 1: hard or get hard. I agree with that. I have
Speaker 1: the same thing with um men not driving teslas. Yeah yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: what I mean? What is it about a man that
Speaker 1: like where a man groom themselves where it's like I
Speaker 1: couldn't date a man unless he was groomed in a
Speaker 1: certain way. I'm just trying to think there's nothing. I mean,
Speaker 1: I don't really mind a lot of body hair or
Speaker 1: anything like that, and not them. I mean, there are
Speaker 1: women that will go if you have back hair, I'm
Speaker 1: not dating you. Like some size penises. There are women
Speaker 1: that are like probably grossed out by that, but you
Speaker 1: should be grossed out by penises in general. Yeah, the
Speaker 1: fact that we haven't learned to like crave penises as weird,
Speaker 1: like just want them in us. We do, but like physically,
Speaker 1: like why don't they don't look more appeeling? I guess
Speaker 1: because we don't need to put them in our mouths.
Speaker 1: It's just something you've seen your whole life. It's what
Speaker 1: you see your whole life. If I saw leg hair
Speaker 1: my whole life, right, it would be more acceptable. Although no,
Speaker 1: I do remember that in like fourth or fifth grade
Speaker 1: one girls had hair, like some girls would shave until
Speaker 1: their knee, yes, and then it would be like even
Speaker 1: if it blond, they go, it's blonde. I'm like, yeah,
Speaker 1: but that's a lot of blond, right, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean? Even then I kind of knew that, like
Speaker 1: I wasn't that attracted to it. I'm the same way.
Speaker 1: I mean, I feel like so much more of a
Speaker 1: woman when I have shaved legs. But it is interesting
Speaker 1: that makeup though. It is just something that highlights things
Speaker 1: that are already natural for a woman to look pretty. Yeah,
Speaker 1: like that are already like. But the hairless leg thing
Speaker 1: is completely I wonder what that is signaling to a
Speaker 1: man's brain that they are more sexually attractive. That is
Speaker 1: kind of an evolution, Yeah, hairless being like if a
Speaker 1: woman's hairless, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, young, it's you. You're right,
Speaker 1: you don't get you don't get hair on your legs
Speaker 1: until you're older. It's a dolphin with long hair. I
Speaker 1: would be turned off. Like there's something about, like, god,
Speaker 1: have you seen that TikTok of someone putting those like
Speaker 1: uh like hard spaghetti through a hot dog and then
Speaker 1: cooking it. It looks like a centipedecee. So you put
Speaker 1: it to a hot dog and then you throw it
Speaker 1: in boiling water and then afterwards all the spaghetti is
Speaker 1: you could strike it through you know what I'm saying,
Speaker 1: And you put in the water and so it looks
Speaker 1: like and then you pull it out and it's just
Speaker 1: this dru and then they put it in a bonnet.
Speaker 1: It's like a spaghetti dog. It just makes me sick. Um.
Speaker 1: So this is one from life pro tips. I just
Speaker 1: thought this is good for me and the bestias and
Speaker 1: you too. Know life pro tip always tell kids that
Speaker 1: they have a cool helmet. Positive reinforcement with helmets can
Speaker 1: cause them to wear them more in the future and
Speaker 1: potentially save their life. I thought that was good. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I mean again, that goes to like being manly and
Speaker 1: being tough as opposed to is it stupid Tony Hawk
Speaker 1: wears a helmet. That's what says here. Also by your
Speaker 1: kids helmets that look cool like their friends have. That's
Speaker 1: a good point. Was there anything when you were a
Speaker 1: kid that you were like, so I needed to have
Speaker 1: like a cool backpack, Like I was so worried that
Speaker 1: I was going to have a lame lame jim shoes,
Speaker 1: lame backpack, lame backpack, lame bike, lame binder. Yes, remember
Speaker 1: the velcro binder came out and couldn't be too colorful
Speaker 1: because I couldn't be a girl, so it had to
Speaker 1: be manly, maybe like a dark blue. Um. Okay that
Speaker 1: I'm wearing now for sure. Let's go to the final thought,
Speaker 1: and let's play the clip that I just found on
Speaker 1: Redditt this morning. That is so weird of this guy
Speaker 1: trying to pick up this girl in like a thrift store.
Speaker 1: So it says it actually reads it for us so
Speaker 1: we can listen. It's so creepy. You're gonna love this.
Speaker 1: I was just trying to thrift. My name Glory, all right.
Speaker 1: I just think you're one of the most beautiful girls ever.
Speaker 1: Nt thank you. Can I buy one of those things
Speaker 1: for you? Oh? No, it's okay, I'll be fusure. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm fine, Okay, Yeah, yeah, are you Jason similar? No,
Speaker 1: I'm not. I'm only seventeen, so okay, well it used
Speaker 1: to be. Yeah, it is all right. I got the
Speaker 1: injury vote a month. I SI ago on my knee
Speaker 1: is kind of a trillion. It's kind of danged up. Um,
Speaker 1: I get bitten by a chick. Actually, maybe you can
Speaker 1: guess which one is is bad? Oh, I have no idea,
Speaker 1: you know, I can't tell. I used the right one anyway,
Speaker 1: A little in the country, and I got a bunch
Speaker 1: of stuff that I it's kind of trying to keep
Speaker 1: up off her work, but it's kind of falling behind.
Speaker 1: I'm looking for someone to help me. Okay, it's a
Speaker 1: paying thing, but it's basically involved getting my stuff of
Speaker 1: the garden in process and some things like tomatoes and
Speaker 1: that kind of stuff. All right, I'm getting a phone call.
Speaker 1: I actually have to go, oh god, what the fuck?
Speaker 1: I mean? That's a guy that eventually he tries that
Speaker 1: a bunch of times and obviously never it never works,
Speaker 1: or he tries it on a mentally ill person and
Speaker 1: they do it, but he's gonna murder her, and then
Speaker 1: he one about the murder because no sexually harass her.
Speaker 1: But no. Well, someone commented and said, uh, yeah, I
Speaker 1: have a farm with an empty storage container that I'm
Speaker 1: currently looking to lock someone up in. Are you interesting?
Speaker 1: She's like, actually, yeah, that sound one of my acid
Speaker 1: vants has sprung a leaka do you know how to weld?
Speaker 1: That's another comment. These people are so funny on Reddit.
Speaker 1: Um yeah, and also, hey, girl, want to check out
Speaker 1: my gross knee, like my pussing knee that up in
Speaker 1: by a tick, like what is wrong with people? And
Speaker 1: also that girl, uh, teach our children to say leave
Speaker 1: me the funk alone. Dude, or like go get you
Speaker 1: don't want to like elevated. I guess it's hard, I know,
Speaker 1: but there she's in a public place where there could
Speaker 1: be other people. But like, man, that is so the hanger.
Speaker 1: The hanger sounds add to the tension to oh yeah,
Speaker 1: I freaking yeah, I ever tried to pick up a
Speaker 1: girl in public? Like total ship to tone because obviously
Speaker 1: we would never do anything like that. But has there
Speaker 1: ever been an attempt to talk to a girl in
Speaker 1: public that you had an attraction to? From afar and like,
Speaker 1: I'm going to say this right now, and you might
Speaker 1: not believe me. I don't think I've ever maybe not okay, silber,
Speaker 1: so sober, sober, not drunk. I've never hit on a
Speaker 1: girl in like a hitting no way in my life,
Speaker 1: that's I know. I mean, I believe you. I don't
Speaker 1: think I've never been at the gym and been like, oh,
Speaker 1: are you like lifting? That's cool? Like I love to
Speaker 1: lift a handful of times like that. But I think
Speaker 1: it happens so often. I think it really put out
Speaker 1: a vibe of like, don't talk to me, and not
Speaker 1: that I'm like I'm the other girls are asking for it.
Speaker 1: I'm not saying that I just I just don't get
Speaker 1: it a lot. And I have to imagine it's not
Speaker 1: because I'm guys don't want to rape me, but um
Speaker 1: it's like but I'm talking about like just even just
Speaker 1: like I get it, just want to sleep with me. Um, No,
Speaker 1: it doesn't. It's never. I'm almost offended that people don't
Speaker 1: do it more often because but I've I think I've
Speaker 1: done I've given my number to like God, I've like
Speaker 1: just gone up and like given my number and walked
Speaker 1: away back in my twenties a lot not so I
Speaker 1: mean sober. Yeah, and they never do. It's a good
Speaker 1: move though, because you're kind of like you're not really
Speaker 1: you're risking it without kind of risking it because you're
Speaker 1: kind of like you're going forward. But if they don't
Speaker 1: call back, I know you did that at the hotel
Speaker 1: that one time. There was the bell man. There is
Speaker 1: a bell boy at the hotel. I just checked out
Speaker 1: of yesterday and I went downstairs and I had all
Speaker 1: my luggage in my room stacked up, and I had
Speaker 1: a tip on it because I was going to go
Speaker 1: down to the lobby and be like, hey, can someone
Speaker 1: go up and get it? And I go down and
Speaker 1: they're like, oh, this guy can get it. And he
Speaker 1: rounds a corner and he's the most attractive person I've
Speaker 1: ever seen, maybe, And he's the bell boy and he's
Speaker 1: probably like twenty two or something like he's way young,
Speaker 1: but he's just gorgeous. I couldn't talk in front of
Speaker 1: all these employees at the at the front desk. I
Speaker 1: was like, I have um and I had to look
Speaker 1: at the ground. I felt insane. I was so it
Speaker 1: wasn't like I was like trying to be like flirtations.
Speaker 1: I couldn't. I was too astounded by how attractive this
Speaker 1: person was, and I felt embarrassed to be in their presence,
Speaker 1: and I was like, it's, um my luggage is um up.
Speaker 1: I couldn't look at him. Have you ever seen someone
Speaker 1: so good looking you couldn't look them in the eye. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: I think so. I can't like put my finger on it.
Speaker 1: But I've been around attractive enough people that are just like, oh,
Speaker 1: you're not even uh, you're not the same kind of
Speaker 1: person as me, Like there's two different kinds of people,
Speaker 1: and you're in some kind of weird cheekbone. And I
Speaker 1: felt like he looked if I looked him in the eyes,
Speaker 1: he would know how much I felt he was hot,
Speaker 1: Like that's something in my My eyes might turn to
Speaker 1: hearts or I don't know why I couldn't make eye
Speaker 1: Conda because I thought he would know everything and it
Speaker 1: would be so embarrassing that this old woman thinks this
Speaker 1: guy is so cute. But it was. It was like
Speaker 1: I was a seventh grader and there was like a
Speaker 1: hot boy at the locker. Next it was so funny.
Speaker 1: I felt like kind of alive again. I was like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, that's so funny. And then I was like,
Speaker 1: how does my room look? What did? I also don't
Speaker 1: expect it like it's your oh yeah, And he also
Speaker 1: just saw all here like rooms. He's like my dirty luggage.
Speaker 1: I'm like Curtius Crisiship. No. I mean, I was just
Speaker 1: and then it's like the people like not trying to
Speaker 1: fuck the bellhop? Or do they just try to suck
Speaker 1: the bellhop? Do we think we're better than the bell hop?
Speaker 1: I was like, this is a White Lotus episode season
Speaker 1: to waiting day. This guy, this kid, I couldn't I've
Speaker 1: never seen someone just where they just walk in and
Speaker 1: I'm like a modeling acting. He was so sweet. It
Speaker 1: was just like a young maybe he was older than
Speaker 1: twenty two, but he was just nicety. He wasn't like
Speaker 1: like he thought he was cool. He was just like
Speaker 1: a sincere bellman. That was like, I'm sorry, I don't
Speaker 1: know you're He was like, what's your name again? Because
Speaker 1: they're all is tell where they're supposed to know your names.
Speaker 1: But he didn't know my name. And I'm like, miss Glazer,
Speaker 1: it's Miss Robinson to you. It's funny, it's this makes
Speaker 1: me think of So last night I watched Euphori episode
Speaker 1: three with this past season, and there's a beginning episode.
Speaker 1: At the beginning of episode, it's about like these two
Speaker 1: high school boys that end up like following that they
Speaker 1: love each other, but they can't be together because it's
Speaker 1: like the nineteen fifty or sixties or whatever. It's like
Speaker 1: an origin story for like one of the other characters,
Speaker 1: like the fathers whatever. Long story short, Oh my god,
Speaker 1: there's one guy, Like they're both extremely attractive guys that
Speaker 1: look like they're in their twenties playing high school kids whatever.
Speaker 1: But the one looked just like Brad Pitt, like like
Speaker 1: a young Brad Pitt. And I literally typed like, I
Speaker 1: don't know why. I just had to google it. I
Speaker 1: had to find out look like Brad like looked like
Speaker 1: typed in You Know You four episode three the guy
Speaker 1: that looks like a young Brad, Oh my god. And
Speaker 1: it's just like so funny. And I found them on
Speaker 1: Instagram and I'm like going through it like it kind
Speaker 1: of looks like Brad Pitt, like like I'm like analyzing
Speaker 1: how hot he is? Does he look like Brad Pitt
Speaker 1: the same? It's so lame. Oh my god. The wormhole
Speaker 1: I got into last night was so embarrassing. I was
Speaker 1: looking at some couple that is like, looks perfect, and
Speaker 1: I'm like, what are you doing? Its three? You should
Speaker 1: go to bed, And I was just like, oh my god,
Speaker 1: I'm so happy for them. They're really cute, Like, let's
Speaker 1: I want to hear what her voice sounds like. She's
Speaker 1: really hotty but she's got a weird voice. And I'm
Speaker 1: like and then I'm just like, god, they seem so happy,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, just go back to like, just get
Speaker 1: off of this. And so I go back to Reddit
Speaker 1: and it's just a picture of a wart being dissected
Speaker 1: and I'm like what, and it's just it's just I'm
Speaker 1: in the subreddit awards like Looking, and I'm deep in it,
Speaker 1: like two years down looking, and I'm like, it just
Speaker 1: was such a quick reminder of like, who I am.
Speaker 1: I'm the single mom with a U T I staying
Speaker 1: up late watching some couple being like they're not that happy,
Speaker 1: and then I go back to like me and my
Speaker 1: wort D. And then the next morning you go, hey,
Speaker 1: I gotta sleep in an extra twenty minutes because because
Speaker 1: that's what I was up late doing last night. It's ridiculous.
Speaker 1: We gotta go. Thank you for listening to podcast. We'll
Speaker 1: be here all week and all month, really in Mexico.
Speaker 1: Thank you so much for listening. Don't be and Jess
Speaker 1: now I just sign a whole list of them and
Speaker 1: we couldn't even pull one