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Speaker 1: Yes, Oh, there we go.

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Speaker 2: All right, are you already? Buys and girls? Here we go.

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Speaker 2: My cousin's husband came on to me. How do I

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Speaker 2: convince my husband that I didn't initiate it?

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Speaker 1: Damn, he's got a quick shot.

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Speaker 2: Apparently this comes from boop girls. Of who says, I

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Speaker 2: apologize because this is so long. A little backstory to start.

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Speaker 2: I twenty eight female, have been lucky enough to find

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Speaker 2: the love of my life twenty eight male at a

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Speaker 2: young age. We've been together for ten years now. We

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Speaker 2: will be married for two years this October.

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Speaker 1: Wow.

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Speaker 2: I'm also part of a very large Hispanic family. My

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Speaker 2: great grandparents had seven or eight kids. Those kids had

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Speaker 2: three to four kids each, some even more than that,

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Speaker 2: and so on and so forth. So we were talking about.

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Speaker 3: An army of a family.

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Speaker 1: It was my god.

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Speaker 2: Ye back in twenty twenty two, when my husband decided

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Speaker 2: to take a six month trip to complete a through

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Speaker 2: hike on the Appalachian Trail.

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Speaker 1: That is that's sick.

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Speaker 3: That's wow.

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Speaker 1: Your husband's sound rad yes, and that is a long

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Speaker 1: time yes, but he sounds sick.

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Speaker 3: That is true.

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Speaker 1: A six month Appalachian trail. I mean, man, he's getting

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Speaker 1: away from things.

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Speaker 3: That is true.

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Speaker 2: I had a lot of support from family and friends.

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Speaker 2: My husband and I traveled a lot, so I decided

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Speaker 2: to move back home. I was extremely depressed because I

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Speaker 2: have separation anxiety and could not completely be myself with

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Speaker 2: my other half so far away from me or so long.

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Speaker 2: But a whole summer goes by and soon enough I

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Speaker 2: will see my husband again. Six months is a heck

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Speaker 2: a long time. That is kind of a lot, And I.

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Speaker 1: Think it's fine. People used to go to war for

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Speaker 1: like two years.

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Speaker 2: And that is that is more relationship, That is more,

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Speaker 2: that is more compulsory.

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Speaker 3: Then this is like a this is a very like volnable.

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Speaker 1: It used to go into the Amazon to explore uncontacted

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Speaker 1: tribes for like two years.

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Speaker 4: And how are there relationship?

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Speaker 1: Sam? Were they good? I don't know, probably not, but

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Speaker 1: they did it. They did it, but they also really

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Speaker 1: really quick. Long distance relationships not that hard. Once again,

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Speaker 1: we have FaceTime. We can watch Netflix with our partners.

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Speaker 1: We did not. We don't have to like go by

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Speaker 1: carrier pigeon or like handwritten letter. We literally I can

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Speaker 1: literally talk to my partner at any time at anywhere.

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Speaker 2: You're right, op should just hook into their fiber optic

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Speaker 2: internet at the at the summit of the Appalachian Trail.

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Speaker 1: I'm sure they have internet somewhere along their trails. Okay.

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Speaker 4: I will say I have a friend who's going on

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Speaker 4: a three week backpacking trip where they won't have internet,

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Speaker 4: and they all they have is a little like SOS

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Speaker 4: device and you can only send like very limited messaging,

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Speaker 4: so you might not be able to center or anything.

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Speaker 3: For three weeks.

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Speaker 2: You're right, Sam, Your your wife is like, hey, I

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Speaker 2: am going to be gone, uh for or six months?

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Speaker 1: Do it all right? There you go. I think that's fine.

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Speaker 2: I mean it's it's I think it's like we always

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Speaker 2: say it's fine depending on the context of a relationship.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, if you've been dating for like six months and

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Speaker 1: then I're like, I'm gonna go away for six months,

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Speaker 1: then like maybe that's a little bit.

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Speaker 3: Not even that.

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Speaker 2: If both people are like yeah, that like like you're saying, hey,

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Speaker 2: if my wife wants six months, more power to her,

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Speaker 2: which makes which and that's what makes it fine.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I want a wife that would be okay with

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Speaker 1: me going into the Appalachian Trail for six months and

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Speaker 1: there you go.

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Speaker 3: Too much shot.

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Speaker 4: Sam is Sam is, uh, what's his name? The guy

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Speaker 4: in Bridgeston, Uh, the one who wants to leave Penelope.

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Speaker 4: He's like, would you.

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Speaker 1: Be okay with a husband who would leave?

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Speaker 3: Oh? Yeah, the blonde guy?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, d.

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Speaker 4: I forget his name, debling delinling Deling.

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Speaker 1: But ideally I go with my significant out. I wouldn't

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Speaker 1: want like, I feel like I would want to travel with.

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Speaker 3: No, you have to abandon you have to abandon each other,

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Speaker 3: that's the deal.

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Speaker 1: But I yeah, the.

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Speaker 2: Husband is gone for six months, not with not hiking

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Speaker 2: with his wife.

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Speaker 1: But I I feel like if it's like something like

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Speaker 1: if she if she's like I need to because I

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Speaker 1: the thing is, if she came to me, is like

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Speaker 1: I need to. I need to like find myself on

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Speaker 1: this mountain. I need to travel for six months. I

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Speaker 1: need to do this thing like it's something that's been

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Speaker 1: calling to me my entire life. I would be like,

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Speaker 1: all right, go do your thing. I wouldn't say no.

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Speaker 2: Which which like again, if two people have uh love,

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Speaker 2: Bubble says six months on purpose or six months.

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Speaker 1: Because because of my terrible sense of directions.

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Speaker 3: Honestly, it is arguable who has a worse sense of direction?

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Speaker 4: Because JM and I have horrible senses of directions, which

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Speaker 4: is funny because both their parents have pretty good.

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Speaker 2: We should have a lost off and see who gets lost,

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Speaker 2: and your bomb says I couldn't date Sam, I die.

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Speaker 3: But I digress.

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Speaker 2: My only point is I think it's totally fine in

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Speaker 2: either scenario. Both parties just have to be enthusiasiastically about

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Speaker 2: whatever they choose.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, at a high level, I think it's fine. What

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Speaker 1: about one year, one year? Yeah, two years? Two years

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Speaker 1: is a little long, and you're cut off is one Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I feel like more than one, like one year is

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Speaker 1: a lot, And I like you could probably only do

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Speaker 1: that like once every ten years.

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Speaker 2: Maybe, And I think people have different I think people

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Speaker 2: have different Again, it's literally up.

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Speaker 1: To but ideally I have a partner that I would

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Speaker 1: I would do that with on the RAG like I

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Speaker 1: would like I Would's not hypothetical, I know, yeah, but yeah,

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Speaker 1: but I'm just saying the idea. Hypothetically one year. I

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Speaker 1: think up to one year that would be chill.

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Speaker 4: I think it also depends on why you're leaving for

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Speaker 4: one year, yeah, because if you're like, I don't know,

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Speaker 4: there's got to be a really good reason because all

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Speaker 4: of your reasons, Sam, We're like, this person is leaving

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Speaker 4: for war. They were probably drafted, they were forced to go.

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Speaker 1: Well, a lot of people like get want to go

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Speaker 1: into the military. They just go into the military, and

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Speaker 1: then they had lived for a while.

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Speaker 4: You were talking about the past.

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Speaker 1: Some people have like eight month deployments in this is true. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: well yeah, but.

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Speaker 4: That's also these are things that like they have to do.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, because a trip for fun.

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Speaker 1: Yeah Okay, I digress, digress.

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Speaker 2: So now I was having a particularly bad night of

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Speaker 2: anxiety and found myself drinking heavily, but I felt safe

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Speaker 2: and secure to do so that, don't know, I mean,

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Speaker 2: keep going. I had been hanging out with my cousin

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Speaker 2: Mia now thirty female and her husband Juan the last

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Speaker 2: couple of weekends, and we were at my tea's my

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Speaker 2: aunt's house, I believe, surrounded by family. Okay, so I

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Speaker 2: think that's where she was, like, but then she said

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Speaker 2: she found herself alone.

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Speaker 1: She is like, she was like like she was hanging

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Speaker 1: out with family, then having a.

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Speaker 3: Bad night and taking heavily, but she was surrounded by family.

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Speaker 2: Okay, So thinking back on it, Huan definitely noticed me

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Speaker 2: crying in my truck, and how heavily I was drinking.

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Speaker 2: By the end of the night, I passed on the

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Speaker 2: couch while Mia and Huan went back downstairs. Soon after,

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Speaker 2: Huan came back upstairs and sat at the end of

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Speaker 2: the couch. He asked, can you keep a secret? I said,

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Speaker 2: what is it? He then just stared at me. I

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Speaker 2: asked again, what do you want? After what felt like

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Speaker 2: an eternity, he leaned down and kissed my neck.

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Speaker 3: Woo baby, And.

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Speaker 1: This is what happens when you leave for a year. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: and again things he can go in for the kill.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, Huan is her cousin's husband. My god, he.

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Speaker 3: Wants to be her Huan and only.

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Speaker 2: I very calmly pushed him away and said, no, my

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Speaker 2: boyfriend at the time is coming back in a week

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Speaker 2: and I'm getting married in two weeks.

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Speaker 3: Wow.

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Speaker 2: So at the end of the six month hiatus, they're

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Speaker 2: getting married.

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Speaker 1: And like, is he just skipping out on any wedding play?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, maybe they're.

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Speaker 2: Just like, all right, we're going, you know, we're just

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Speaker 2: it's getting married is like hiking the trail.

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Speaker 3: You just take your first step and you just keep

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Speaker 3: putting one foot in front of the other, so we'll.

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Speaker 1: Figure I could understand, I could understand before committing your

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Speaker 1: life to someone going on a solo journey.

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Speaker 4: He's gonna get to the wedding and this is gonna

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Speaker 4: be a whole speech that he gives. He's like, I

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Speaker 4: was out on the Appalachian Trail and I found myself

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Speaker 4: and I realized that this is the person. It's just

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Speaker 4: going to be a really long speech about him finding

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Speaker 4: himself his love and realizing that this is who he's mentioned.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I was out there looking for something and I

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Speaker 1: realized what I was looking for is right back at home.

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Speaker 3: I left it beyond my wife.

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Speaker 4: But he's planned it all out even before.

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Speaker 1: He was Yeah. Yeah, he's like, I'm going on this

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Speaker 1: journey just so I can give something to talk about

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Speaker 1: as speech when I get home.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: The next morning, I woke up around ten am and

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Speaker 2: was still intoxicated, but I remembered everything, which, by the way,

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Speaker 2: she was drinking heavily. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, someone I forgot where it said, but someone said,

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Speaker 1: oh yeah, Bethany said, sounds like he was trying to

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Speaker 1: take advantage of her. Gross. That feels like what was happening.

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Speaker 1: One more thing, I feel like this is like a

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Speaker 1: we had another story where like someone like was getting

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Speaker 1: super drunk and went to a club and was like

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Speaker 1: and and and you know, like all this stuff and

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Speaker 1: ideally you feel like you could be safe anywhere. But

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Speaker 1: this is like her family, you can be most safe

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Speaker 1: and like most willing to let herself you know, like

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Speaker 1: loose and and and drink so much because she feels safe.

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Speaker 1: And Huan taking advantage of that is extra gross because

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Speaker 1: it's different when it's like a random guy who you

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Speaker 1: don't know at all is like trying to take advantage

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Speaker 1: of the situation. But Juan, which was just still terrible,

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Speaker 1: but like.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, undially most assault cases, ye are yeah, people that

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Speaker 4: you know.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, but it's just just Huan scum of the earth

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Speaker 1: for doing.

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Speaker 2: One hundred percent being the girl's girl that I am

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Speaker 2: and loyal to my family. I decided later that day,

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Speaker 2: at my nephew's birthdate to party, I was going to

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Speaker 2: tell Juan's wife, Mia what happened. I told her. She

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Speaker 2: confronted her husband. After questioning him, he admitted to everything

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Speaker 2: just as I had said. He left their house and

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Speaker 2: I stayed the night with Mia. She then reveals that

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Speaker 2: Juan has cheated several times before. Some she can't prove,

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Speaker 2: but suspects he has laid hands on her, and even

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Speaker 2: her parents tried to pay him not to marry her.

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Speaker 2: I was shocked because online they seem so perfect. Eventually,

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Speaker 2: Mia ended up still choosing to stay with Juan, which

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Speaker 2: is fine, OPI says. I can't control other people or

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Speaker 2: their relationships. I did tell my husband everything and he

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Speaker 2: was pissed. My husband ended up confronting Kuan six months

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Speaker 2: later at a family function. Juan apologized again and admitted

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Speaker 2: what he did was wrong. But ever since then, all

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Speaker 2: the family functions have been weird, and so many of

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Speaker 2: my cousins have been have acted differently towards me. Fast

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Speaker 2: forward to present day. I recently found out that there

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Speaker 2: was a group chat with a few of my cousins,

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Speaker 2: including Mia, and they they think that I initiated whatever

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Speaker 2: happened that night, and they are not just taking it

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Speaker 2: out on me, but my sister as well. I don't

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Speaker 2: know what to do. I love my family so much,

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Speaker 2: and I thought I was doing the right thing. I

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Speaker 2: know now that sometimes water is thicker. Do I try

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Speaker 2: to explain my side to the family that wasn't even involved,

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Speaker 2: or should I not waste my breath? No one asked

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Speaker 2: me about anything. They just believed whatever bs they heard

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Speaker 2: that is so bad. So they're flipping it on her

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Speaker 2: completely when OP was OP is the victim in this

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Speaker 2: in this scenario, So should I speak up or accept

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Speaker 2: the fact that a lot of the bridges with expend

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Speaker 2: with extended family are burnt? That is the end of

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Speaker 2: this story. But so what's the real question? Should you

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Speaker 2: cut off a significant other because of a toxic family member?

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Speaker 3: This one? Absolutely?

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Speaker 2: It's interesting because I feel like we started the story

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Speaker 2: thinking that we were going to be addressing the husband

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Speaker 2: and everything, but from all the context we had, it

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Speaker 2: seemed like the husband was at least completely supportive and

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Speaker 2: believing in everything of his wife and is probably her

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Speaker 2: support system and all this absolutely like you're.

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Speaker 1: Absolutely cut off the husband or cut off the family.

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Speaker 3: Oh sorry, cut off the family.

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Speaker 2: Your family is not entitled to be able to have

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Speaker 2: access to harass you and do all of these things

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Speaker 2: when you were literally the victim and these were things

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Speaker 2: being done to you. You can lean into your support system.

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Speaker 2: You can say forget them, I'm going to go to

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Speaker 2: where I am supported, which it sounds like is the

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Speaker 2: husband and that is per ficklely fine.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, Love Bubble says, welcome to victim blaming and that

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Speaker 1: they are blaming the victim for doing it in the

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Speaker 1: first place, which is a sad thing that OPI has

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Speaker 1: to deal with now, just absolutely literally just being there

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Speaker 1: and being being taken advantage by Baijuan, and like.

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Speaker 2: It could it could be the you know, the wife

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Speaker 2: Mia Mia mentioned like, oh, he's cheated multiple times, and

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Speaker 2: maybe she's like in denial and just finding some sort

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Speaker 2: of excuse to like kind of like lying to herself

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Speaker 2: to like justify all this, which is just so Mia

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Speaker 2: deserves better and she knows that that he's cheated multiple times.

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Speaker 1: And yet she still stays with him and then cheats

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Speaker 1: on with a family member and she still stands by it.

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Speaker 2: Still stands by it when when he literally even just

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Speaker 2: that one single incident alone absolutely is worthy of of

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Speaker 2: U Mia being able to cut off the relationship, let

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Speaker 2: alone all the other stuff that he did.

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Speaker 1: I think to talk to the husband and be like,

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Speaker 1: we need to go no contact with your family because

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Speaker 1: I can't I can't stay here.

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Speaker 2: I'm going to double check. I believe this is Ope's

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Speaker 2: own blood family, not the husband. Oh and that hence

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Speaker 2: hence kind of like which makes.

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Speaker 1: It easier actually.

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Speaker 2: Right, right, because it's like if it was the husband's family,

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Speaker 2: maybe the husband's like, ah, I maybe I don't want

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Speaker 2: to have count I know these people all my life.

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Speaker 2: But yeah, because it's like Opie's own family, it's like, hey,

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Speaker 2: I'm the one that's like using the scenario. Yeah, I

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Speaker 2: am double checking.

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Speaker 1: I am.

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Speaker 2: I am a part of a very large Hispanic family.

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Speaker 2: My great grandpa is everything. So this is Ope's biological family.

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Speaker 1: Okay, so at least it makes it easier for Ope.

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Speaker 1: It feels like Ope has all the power to make

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Speaker 1: that decision to cut at the family. But if we're

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Speaker 1: discussing should you cut off the family or go no

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Speaker 1: contact with a family or not, I think go no

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Speaker 1: contact with the family, because they're choosing Kwan side over

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Speaker 1: anyone else.

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Speaker 3: Ridiculous.

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Speaker 1: And Mia is complicit in this. I mean, like it

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Speaker 1: sucks because she's also a victim. But you know she's

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Speaker 1: not saying anything.

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Speaker 2: It doesn't mean it doesn't mean op deserves to be

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Speaker 2: treated exactly being treated at the same token.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, but I would love to know from you guys,

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Speaker 1: like do you think there's anything that we're missing. Have

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Speaker 1: you ever been in a situation like this, if you

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Speaker 1: have had, maybe like a family member, you've had to

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Speaker 1: cut off, call us, all us on the discord.

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Speaker 3: Let us know.

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Speaker 1: Bethany says, Mia just wants to save face. It is

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Speaker 1: stupid people believe her, knowing that Juan is a serial

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Speaker 1: cheater and he admitted to making the moves on a

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Speaker 1: very drunk opiece. Through anyone who believes Mia. Bethany, you've

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Speaker 1: been shout out to Bethany for the fire comments on it.

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Speaker 1: I feel like Bethany has been yeah, super on it lately.

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Speaker 2: Lady Morgan also had a really good comment on victim

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Speaker 2: blaming is probably a hoping mechanism for the cousin Mia.

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Speaker 2: It's her way of excusing the husband's behavior, cheating multiple times.

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Speaker 3: Et cetera, et cetera.

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Speaker 2: So this is like possibly a coping mechanism that she

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Speaker 2: uses to kind of.

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Speaker 1: Like rationalize staying with this.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and she's like, you know, like leaving your partner

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Speaker 2: does uproot your life. Yeah, So I could see the

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Speaker 2: It's it is a it's obviously not the right line

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Speaker 2: of thinking, but I could see why people are averse

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Speaker 2: or afraid of change.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, basically, as tiny Cactus says, no one should be

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Speaker 1: able to have to deal with this. That's freakin' right.

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Speaker 1: I see you, Cactus, I see you, shout out, tiny Cactus.

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Speaker 2: That's right, real quick, don't Thanks for the don'no from

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Speaker 2: Artika Waterman. Thanks for to two bucks on the donor link. Hell, everyone,

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Speaker 2: it's officially my thirty second birthday. Rise to all Gemini's

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00:16:47,840 --> 00:16:50,160
Speaker 2: loll I hope all you guys are great, and also

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Speaker 2: the stream is amazing and I'm finally if one's happy

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00:16:52,480 --> 00:16:53,760
Speaker 2: about my life, love to hear that.

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Speaker 3: Awesome.

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Speaker 2: My dad got me a skeleton bottle of tequila for

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Speaker 2: my birthday. It's freakin' lit. Let's go Marquis Waterman. We

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Speaker 2: love to see it. Do we have anyone that's oh?

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00:17:05,800 --> 00:17:11,040
Speaker 2: We have some more people celebrating their memberships. Chasm seventeen

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Speaker 2: twelve celebrate their one month membership. Yeay, happy to catch alive.

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Speaker 2: Let's go me celebrating their two month membership. She should

355
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Speaker 2: run one hundred percent.

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Speaker 3: And Pinky dis Layers celebrating a two month membership.

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Speaker 2: I do, but I messaged dryly, not Sophia, which is

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Speaker 2: what you which is perfect, which means we are going

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Speaker 2: to see Sophia.

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Speaker 3: Do we do we have anyone on the horn? Yeah,

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Speaker 3: we could.

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Speaker 1: Get some while on the horn. Get someone on the horn,

363
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Speaker 1: get someone on.

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Speaker 3: The we got horn?

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Speaker 1: Who do we got?

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Speaker 4: Because I'm feeling oh horn.

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Speaker 3: We will read some Jesse.

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Speaker 2: You let him, Oh you let him Shenan once he's

369
00:17:57,240 --> 00:17:58,399
Speaker 2: gonna sNaN again.

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00:17:58,880 --> 00:18:02,240
Speaker 3: Timely. Oh yeah, let him Shannan once he's gonna Shanan again.

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00:18:02,600 --> 00:18:03,160
Speaker 3: Time to leave.

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Speaker 2: Love Bubbles also says yes, Bethany and Lady Morrigan, this

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Speaker 2: is so toxic and later on dangerous.

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Speaker 3: Absolutely yeah.

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Speaker 2: Blue Alki says Mea needs to keep her nasty, her

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00:18:16,000 --> 00:18:21,159
Speaker 2: nasty husband away from her family. I mean, altimately, I

377
00:18:21,200 --> 00:18:23,639
Speaker 2: think the best case scenario is the divorce, you know,

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Speaker 2: and she's able to get as far away from him

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Speaker 2: as possible, therefore also ensuring that he's as far away

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Speaker 2: from the family as possible. But I think we have

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Speaker 2: someone that's we're going to chat with on the horn.

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Speaker 5: Uh.

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Speaker 2: Oh, spin that wheel, baby, let's hello. Hello, Hello, thanks

384
00:18:44,440 --> 00:18:48,760
Speaker 2: for hopping on with us. So, uh do you have

385
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Speaker 2: a story slash advice for being able to cut off

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Speaker 2: toxic family members?

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Speaker 5: Yes? So I actually cut my father all from my life.

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Speaker 6: Because what he did to be and my sister like

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Speaker 6: while we were growing up, basically it was borderline of

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00:19:13,640 --> 00:19:18,560
Speaker 6: use towards us. So after a while, we like years

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00:19:19,000 --> 00:19:22,560
Speaker 6: after I went, I reached eighteen, and I was legally

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Speaker 6: don't I basically tell him like, uh, yeah, I'm not

393
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Speaker 6: contacting you. Do not contact me no more nothing. We're done.

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Speaker 6: What you've been doing is wrong between me and what

395
00:19:33,280 --> 00:19:36,440
Speaker 6: you've done wrong to me and my sister. Yeah, we're

396
00:19:36,560 --> 00:19:37,680
Speaker 6: we're done talking to you.

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Speaker 3: Yeah. And I kind of like, oh, sorry, go ahead,

398
00:19:41,040 --> 00:19:41,880
Speaker 3: and a lot.

399
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Speaker 6: The last time I saw him was like five years ago, Wow,

400
00:19:46,560 --> 00:19:48,959
Speaker 6: when my grandmother was in the hospital.

401
00:19:49,320 --> 00:19:49,520
Speaker 1: Wow.

402
00:19:49,520 --> 00:19:53,359
Speaker 6: And he saw my daughter for the first time, but

403
00:19:53,440 --> 00:19:55,520
Speaker 6: I kept my daughter away from him and tell him

404
00:19:55,880 --> 00:20:00,320
Speaker 6: she's not your granddaughter. Her grandpa has passed away. Was

405
00:20:00,359 --> 00:20:03,840
Speaker 6: my mother's husband. He passed away.

406
00:20:06,320 --> 00:20:09,399
Speaker 1: Was that hard for you to, like, because I mean,

407
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Speaker 1: I think it takes courage to confront someone like that,

408
00:20:12,800 --> 00:20:18,520
Speaker 1: especially someone who who's been so abusive, when like, like,

409
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Speaker 1: how did you summon the courage to finally say that,

410
00:20:22,640 --> 00:20:25,160
Speaker 1: And like what advice would you give to someone who

411
00:20:25,720 --> 00:20:28,840
Speaker 1: maybe was in your situation? Is trying to summon the

412
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Speaker 1: courage to say to like to say something and to

413
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Speaker 1: cut that person out.

414
00:20:32,680 --> 00:20:34,080
Speaker 5: It takes a lot of courage.

415
00:20:34,760 --> 00:20:39,040
Speaker 6: Yeah, Like I took I took it for I took

416
00:20:39,119 --> 00:20:41,439
Speaker 6: a big step for me and my sister. Like, my

417
00:20:41,560 --> 00:20:44,480
Speaker 6: sister hasn't seen him. Like wait, me and my sister

418
00:20:44,480 --> 00:20:48,400
Speaker 6: are like seven years apart, and she don't even speak

419
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Speaker 6: to him. She because she sees him, like even sees him,

420
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Speaker 6: and like if he would have showed up like now,

421
00:20:53,920 --> 00:20:58,000
Speaker 6: she would have long panic attack. Yeah, because, Yeah, I

422
00:20:58,960 --> 00:21:01,840
Speaker 6: stood up for me and my sister, Like I'm the youngest,

423
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Speaker 6: and I was like, no, we're done, don't contact us,

424
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Speaker 6: no more nothing.

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Speaker 5: I don't even want to see you. I want to

426
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Speaker 5: speak to you. What you had done is wrong.

427
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Speaker 6: Basically, my former best friend was the one that kind

428
00:21:17,160 --> 00:21:19,800
Speaker 6: of helped me out. She's like, what he's been doing

429
00:21:19,840 --> 00:21:23,560
Speaker 6: to you and everything is so wrong.

430
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Speaker 5: You need to cut him out. It's going to be hard.

431
00:21:26,200 --> 00:21:27,000
Speaker 5: I understand.

432
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Speaker 1: Yeah, it's hard, but it's hard.

433
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Speaker 6: My life had it, but my life has been so

434
00:21:34,040 --> 00:21:36,840
Speaker 6: much better without seeing him and everything.

435
00:21:37,080 --> 00:21:38,840
Speaker 5: Yeah, I still.

436
00:21:38,600 --> 00:21:41,479
Speaker 6: See some of the family, but we really kind of

437
00:21:41,520 --> 00:21:45,880
Speaker 6: don't get along because they it's his side of the family,

438
00:21:46,000 --> 00:21:48,600
Speaker 6: it's my real dad's side of the family. They kind

439
00:21:48,600 --> 00:21:51,199
Speaker 6: of like want to stay in touch with him, but

440
00:21:51,440 --> 00:21:53,399
Speaker 6: a lot of the people like a lot of that

441
00:21:53,480 --> 00:21:57,400
Speaker 6: side of him. I barely have contact, Like my aunt

442
00:21:57,480 --> 00:22:00,080
Speaker 6: lives like a street behind me and I rarely.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean again, shout out to you for having

444
00:22:03,520 --> 00:22:05,639
Speaker 1: the courage. And I feel like something that's really cool

445
00:22:05,760 --> 00:22:07,800
Speaker 1: about your story and something we were talking about in

446
00:22:07,800 --> 00:22:11,040
Speaker 1: an earlier episode is like, sometimes it takes a friend

447
00:22:11,400 --> 00:22:15,199
Speaker 1: to see you as more than you see yourself. Like

448
00:22:15,280 --> 00:22:19,119
Speaker 1: it's to to realize to like show you you should

449
00:22:19,160 --> 00:22:22,920
Speaker 1: be treated better and you should not accept that kind

450
00:22:22,960 --> 00:22:27,320
Speaker 1: of treatment. And like that is the step that's like,

451
00:22:27,359 --> 00:22:30,440
Speaker 1: oh no, I should not accept this treatment and then

452
00:22:30,680 --> 00:22:33,399
Speaker 1: gives you the courage to actually make the change and

453
00:22:33,480 --> 00:22:36,359
Speaker 1: cut that toxic person out. And you know, I feel

454
00:22:36,359 --> 00:22:39,040
Speaker 1: like Lynn, like you know, your your story off like

455
00:22:39,200 --> 00:22:42,440
Speaker 1: can can help people. Maybe that like this story is

456
00:22:42,440 --> 00:22:45,760
Speaker 1: is that for someone who's going through something something similar,

457
00:22:46,040 --> 00:22:49,080
Speaker 1: But in the story that we we just heard, do

458
00:22:49,119 --> 00:22:53,760
Speaker 1: you think like uh op should do anything more or

459
00:22:53,760 --> 00:22:57,239
Speaker 1: do anything differently and cutting off her family that is

460
00:22:57,280 --> 00:23:03,440
Speaker 1: basically supporting someone who uh try out and scrassed one

461
00:23:03,440 --> 00:23:06,280
Speaker 1: of her boundaries while she was intoxicated. It from someone

462
00:23:06,320 --> 00:23:09,119
Speaker 1: that she thought was a safe family member. Do you

463
00:23:09,160 --> 00:23:12,639
Speaker 1: think she should have done anything differently? And like what

464
00:23:12,880 --> 00:23:15,240
Speaker 1: about maybe how she handled it do you think was

465
00:23:15,280 --> 00:23:18,280
Speaker 1: good or could change or if anything?

466
00:23:18,440 --> 00:23:22,199
Speaker 6: I mean, in that sense, it doesn't matter if she

467
00:23:22,800 --> 00:23:26,679
Speaker 6: if anything, regardless if you're drunk or not, if whatever,

468
00:23:27,359 --> 00:23:30,040
Speaker 6: If you basically say no, I don't want this or

469
00:23:30,080 --> 00:23:32,480
Speaker 6: nothing like that, or basically if you say no to

470
00:23:32,560 --> 00:23:34,760
Speaker 6: anything like that, first should respect you.

471
00:23:35,200 --> 00:23:38,679
Speaker 5: Like, I have a problem with my husband's best friend.

472
00:23:39,280 --> 00:23:41,879
Speaker 6: He keeps hitting on me all the time, and I

473
00:23:41,960 --> 00:23:44,879
Speaker 6: keep telling him like, you have to sit him down.

474
00:23:45,640 --> 00:23:49,320
Speaker 6: I tell him to, you need to stop. But we're

475
00:23:49,960 --> 00:23:51,240
Speaker 6: we're actually about to separate.

476
00:23:51,400 --> 00:23:52,840
Speaker 1: So oh really.

477
00:23:53,440 --> 00:23:55,680
Speaker 6: Yeah, I mean that's been about to separate, But I

478
00:23:55,920 --> 00:23:59,880
Speaker 6: do I still tell him, like, regardless of what's going

479
00:23:59,880 --> 00:24:02,439
Speaker 6: on on between us, you need to sit there and

480
00:24:02,480 --> 00:24:06,320
Speaker 6: tell your friend to like, hey, you need to back off,

481
00:24:06,880 --> 00:24:10,480
Speaker 6: Like he's even though he's like my my friend too,

482
00:24:11,000 --> 00:24:14,359
Speaker 6: but his girlfriend is actually my former best friend.

483
00:24:15,040 --> 00:24:17,480
Speaker 1: Man, that makes it so much more complicated.

484
00:24:18,280 --> 00:24:23,080
Speaker 6: Yeah, this lady is already crazy. I mean, you me

485
00:24:23,080 --> 00:24:26,879
Speaker 6: and her don't talk, but we thought once in a

486
00:24:26,880 --> 00:24:29,320
Speaker 6: while or something like we all played like me and

487
00:24:29,440 --> 00:24:32,240
Speaker 6: him and my husband and his best friend. We all

488
00:24:32,280 --> 00:24:35,399
Speaker 6: play video games all together. So I do hear in

489
00:24:35,440 --> 00:24:38,920
Speaker 6: the back and everything. I might say hey or something

490
00:24:39,000 --> 00:24:42,119
Speaker 6: like that, but like as a respect, like I won't

491
00:24:42,200 --> 00:24:45,040
Speaker 6: even if we did get divorce and everything and his

492
00:24:45,040 --> 00:24:46,000
Speaker 6: friends still keep him.

493
00:24:46,000 --> 00:24:47,320
Speaker 5: I mean, I'm still like, no.

494
00:24:47,280 --> 00:24:49,800
Speaker 3: Dude, you my husband.

495
00:24:50,000 --> 00:24:52,600
Speaker 5: Friend, I'm not about to go in that ship at all.

496
00:24:52,760 --> 00:24:56,840
Speaker 6: That's that's I keep free entering even though you are

497
00:24:56,880 --> 00:25:00,640
Speaker 6: with my former best friend and you got kids with her. Yeah, yeah,

498
00:25:01,080 --> 00:25:03,640
Speaker 6: I am not crossing that line ever.

499
00:25:04,119 --> 00:25:06,280
Speaker 1: Is super important. I think that's something that.

500
00:25:06,200 --> 00:25:08,960
Speaker 6: We should like boundaries is like, yeah, like boundaries are

501
00:25:09,119 --> 00:25:09,960
Speaker 6: very important.

502
00:25:10,600 --> 00:25:14,520
Speaker 5: I have, like, like the boundary with my daughter.

503
00:25:15,080 --> 00:25:19,280
Speaker 6: I only have certain people like I try that I trust,

504
00:25:19,359 --> 00:25:21,800
Speaker 6: like to watch her. Like the whole thing with my

505
00:25:21,880 --> 00:25:25,639
Speaker 6: real dad. When I went to visit my grandmother and

506
00:25:25,680 --> 00:25:28,840
Speaker 6: he saw my daughter for the first time, I made

507
00:25:28,840 --> 00:25:32,680
Speaker 6: it absolutely clear to my aunts that were there with

508
00:25:32,760 --> 00:25:36,760
Speaker 6: him that if I ever see him alone with my daughter,

509
00:25:37,440 --> 00:25:40,840
Speaker 6: I will call. There will be a fight in this hospital. Yea,

510
00:25:42,040 --> 00:25:44,719
Speaker 6: I will be here because that's my daughter and I

511
00:25:44,760 --> 00:25:46,840
Speaker 6: trust y'all n on her.

512
00:25:47,160 --> 00:25:49,240
Speaker 1: I feel like it's so important to make sure that

513
00:25:49,440 --> 00:25:52,240
Speaker 1: you set those boundaries, and it seems like you've done

514
00:25:52,240 --> 00:25:55,120
Speaker 1: that with your family. And then also like I think

515
00:25:55,160 --> 00:25:58,359
Speaker 1: something that we should like applaud o p for is

516
00:25:58,720 --> 00:26:02,600
Speaker 1: immediately setting those boundaries as soon as it happened. And

517
00:26:02,640 --> 00:26:04,520
Speaker 1: it seems like with like what your story, it's like,

518
00:26:04,520 --> 00:26:07,119
Speaker 1: all right, you did the same and it was good

519
00:26:07,160 --> 00:26:10,200
Speaker 1: for you and your daughter, which is which is awesome.

520
00:26:10,280 --> 00:26:13,200
Speaker 1: So uh yeah, Lynn, thank you so much for calling

521
00:26:13,200 --> 00:26:18,560
Speaker 1: in sharing your perspective. We really appreciate it. Welcome, excellent,

522
00:26:18,920 --> 00:26:19,840
Speaker 1: go on chat soon.

523
00:26:21,560 --> 00:26:22,200
Speaker 3: Well there you go.

524
00:26:22,560 --> 00:26:25,639
Speaker 1: Yeah, I feel like boundaries are so important and like

525
00:26:25,880 --> 00:26:29,960
Speaker 1: I mean, Lynn's stories really show that, and I think, like, uh,

526
00:26:30,240 --> 00:26:35,160
Speaker 1: it's good op set those boundaries as soon as possible.

527
00:26:35,200 --> 00:26:38,040
Speaker 1: Even like, I mean, it sucks that it still was

528
00:26:38,440 --> 00:26:42,919
Speaker 1: you know, not uh not respected by the family. But

529
00:26:43,440 --> 00:26:46,040
Speaker 1: I think she didn't do anything wrong. I think she'd

530
00:26:46,119 --> 00:26:50,640
Speaker 1: like like textbook answer to a really crappy situation.

531
00:26:50,800 --> 00:26:52,639
Speaker 2: Yeah, I looked for supporting her husband. It seems like

532
00:26:52,640 --> 00:26:53,320
Speaker 2: the husband gave it.

533
00:26:54,640 --> 00:26:56,760
Speaker 1: This is an episode from Deep Within the Archives.

534
00:26:56,880 --> 00:27:00,639
Speaker 3: Time for okop relam.

535
00:27:00,359 --> 00:27:03,520
Speaker 1: My Mom is trying to steal my liver to save

536
00:27:03,600 --> 00:27:06,919
Speaker 1: her life. The thing is, I don't really care if

537
00:27:06,920 --> 00:27:09,040
Speaker 1: she dies? Am I the a hole?

538
00:27:09,440 --> 00:27:12,800
Speaker 2: You know how they say like, oh, that's just chopped liver,

539
00:27:13,040 --> 00:27:15,520
Speaker 2: you know, like like it's nothing, Like it's useless.

540
00:27:15,800 --> 00:27:18,679
Speaker 1: You know, it's nothing. It's well maybe it is what

541
00:27:19,200 --> 00:27:24,399
Speaker 1: Maybe you're useless? You know. Back in my day, you

542
00:27:24,480 --> 00:27:27,639
Speaker 1: have to work with your own kid Wow, kidneys weren't

543
00:27:27,760 --> 00:27:32,359
Speaker 1: just given to you, Willy nilpe. So you know what, Mom,

544
00:27:34,200 --> 00:27:35,919
Speaker 1: don't your own kidney shit? You know?

545
00:27:36,200 --> 00:27:36,600
Speaker 3: Wow?

546
00:27:36,880 --> 00:27:39,760
Speaker 1: Survive on your own? How about that? How about that?

547
00:27:39,840 --> 00:27:43,440
Speaker 1: They're always saying, gen Z, gen Z, you're never working? Well, well,

548
00:27:43,440 --> 00:27:44,680
Speaker 1: why don't your kidneys work?

549
00:27:44,720 --> 00:27:44,840
Speaker 5: Well?

550
00:27:44,880 --> 00:27:49,320
Speaker 1: Oh snap, why don't your kidneys come on? Now? Maybe

551
00:27:49,440 --> 00:27:52,800
Speaker 1: uh maybe uh maybe you need to be more spry.

552
00:27:53,160 --> 00:27:55,720
Speaker 1: Maybe uh maybe put some more kid in it, you

553
00:27:55,720 --> 00:27:56,400
Speaker 1: know that's right.

554
00:27:56,480 --> 00:27:58,199
Speaker 3: Yeah, put the kid in the knee, you know what

555
00:27:58,200 --> 00:27:58,560
Speaker 3: I mean?

556
00:27:58,840 --> 00:28:01,199
Speaker 1: Put that kid in the knee, all right. Anyway, So

557
00:28:01,600 --> 00:28:03,959
Speaker 1: when I was a kid, my mom was pretty awful

558
00:28:04,200 --> 00:28:07,800
Speaker 1: to me and my siblings, resentful, a bit of a bully,

559
00:28:08,119 --> 00:28:10,560
Speaker 1: never hugged any of us, and manly told us how

560
00:28:10,600 --> 00:28:13,560
Speaker 1: we ruined her life. Dan you get the picture. I

561
00:28:13,680 --> 00:28:17,240
Speaker 1: moved out at seventeen to keep my handity sounds like

562
00:28:17,240 --> 00:28:18,040
Speaker 1: a lovely homework.

563
00:28:18,160 --> 00:28:19,960
Speaker 3: So nice, so nice.

564
00:28:20,000 --> 00:28:22,240
Speaker 1: Thanks mom for giving me all this trauma that I

565
00:28:22,240 --> 00:28:24,679
Speaker 1: could turn into a Reddit story and get red on.

566
00:28:24,720 --> 00:28:29,440
Speaker 1: Okayoo yo, that's called silver linings. Learn about it, read

567
00:28:29,480 --> 00:28:32,400
Speaker 1: about it, and incorporate it in here. Oh yeah, I'm

568
00:28:32,400 --> 00:28:34,879
Speaker 1: twenty eight now and have never had much of a

569
00:28:34,880 --> 00:28:38,720
Speaker 1: relationship with her after moving out, as she never once

570
00:28:38,880 --> 00:28:42,600
Speaker 1: admitted that she had done something really effed up to us.

571
00:28:43,200 --> 00:28:45,719
Speaker 1: I mean, it doesn't sound like if mama can't even

572
00:28:46,000 --> 00:28:49,440
Speaker 1: you know, make her kidneys work, then how is she

573
00:28:49,480 --> 00:28:50,880
Speaker 1: gonna make her brain work.

574
00:28:50,800 --> 00:28:53,040
Speaker 3: Make this relationship work? Am I right?

575
00:28:53,600 --> 00:28:56,240
Speaker 1: It doesn't sound like she's she's really doing too good

576
00:28:56,240 --> 00:29:00,440
Speaker 1: on making things work. My sister is married and has

577
00:29:00,480 --> 00:29:03,840
Speaker 1: two kids. My brother is divorced with three kids. I

578
00:29:03,880 --> 00:29:06,800
Speaker 1: got a call from the hospital that my mom managed

579
00:29:06,840 --> 00:29:11,040
Speaker 1: to drink her liver out of order and needs transplants.

580
00:29:11,320 --> 00:29:13,480
Speaker 1: All of us siblings were found out to be a match.

581
00:29:13,800 --> 00:29:16,680
Speaker 1: My sister and brother once they realized that cutting out

582
00:29:16,720 --> 00:29:20,680
Speaker 1: part of your liver isn't risk free, backed out. I

583
00:29:20,840 --> 00:29:24,320
Speaker 1: was told I have something called sidis and versus, meaning

584
00:29:24,360 --> 00:29:27,560
Speaker 1: my organs are abnormally placed, and that it would make

585
00:29:27,600 --> 00:29:31,320
Speaker 1: the risk of surgery higher for me four percent risk

586
00:29:31,400 --> 00:29:35,640
Speaker 1: of death within two weeks of surgery and higher risk

587
00:29:36,040 --> 00:29:39,400
Speaker 1: of other awful shit happening, and of course one hundred

588
00:29:39,400 --> 00:29:43,480
Speaker 1: percent guarantee that my mother will drink away that liver too.

589
00:29:44,160 --> 00:29:44,520
Speaker 6: Yeah.

590
00:29:44,680 --> 00:29:48,440
Speaker 2: That's the other thing is you're almost like enabling. I

591
00:29:48,480 --> 00:29:52,320
Speaker 2: guess you drank away your liver. Just live with it,

592
00:29:52,440 --> 00:29:53,360
Speaker 2: you know, yeah, you know?

593
00:29:54,400 --> 00:29:54,760
Speaker 3: Wow?

594
00:29:55,080 --> 00:29:59,440
Speaker 1: Now, everyone, the doctor, my mom, siblings, everyone is telling

595
00:29:59,480 --> 00:30:02,240
Speaker 1: me I should do it because I don't have kids,

596
00:30:02,560 --> 00:30:07,720
Speaker 1: So who cares if the risk is high you have kids, useless,

597
00:30:07,920 --> 00:30:10,560
Speaker 1: You're a waste of human life. You're not popping out

598
00:30:10,800 --> 00:30:18,080
Speaker 1: babies like a gatling gun. Well maybe you should be. Yeah,

599
00:30:18,120 --> 00:30:20,160
Speaker 1: you know, come on, well, why don't you add to

600
00:30:20,200 --> 00:30:23,000
Speaker 1: the population. Why don't you add over population?

601
00:30:23,160 --> 00:30:23,360
Speaker 3: Now?

602
00:30:24,240 --> 00:30:26,760
Speaker 1: You know, I want more mouths for this world's right.

603
00:30:27,280 --> 00:30:31,920
Speaker 1: This pissed me off. My family never valued my lifestyle

604
00:30:31,960 --> 00:30:35,040
Speaker 1: as a decided not to do life by the script

605
00:30:35,600 --> 00:30:38,120
Speaker 1: about a cabin in the wilderness in the north and

606
00:30:38,200 --> 00:30:41,200
Speaker 1: work from home, so I rarely have to leave my

607
00:30:41,280 --> 00:30:44,360
Speaker 1: lovely little hideaway. I make enough money to live the

608
00:30:44,400 --> 00:30:47,800
Speaker 1: life I have always dreamed of, but apparently that does

609
00:30:47,840 --> 00:30:50,520
Speaker 1: not count since I don't want kicks. And my mom,

610
00:30:50,600 --> 00:30:53,600
Speaker 1: who never cared if I lived or died, suddenly thinks

611
00:30:53,760 --> 00:30:56,800
Speaker 1: she deserves my liver because she gave birth to me.

612
00:30:58,160 --> 00:31:02,200
Speaker 1: You're nothing but a liver carrier, you know, you're you're

613
00:31:02,640 --> 00:31:06,520
Speaker 1: I like you to eventually kill you for your liver.

614
00:31:06,880 --> 00:31:09,320
Speaker 3: She's she's, she's a vending machine of organs.

615
00:31:09,360 --> 00:31:09,600
Speaker 1: You know.

616
00:31:09,800 --> 00:31:12,440
Speaker 3: It's like B three liver, please.

617
00:31:12,560 --> 00:31:15,240
Speaker 1: Yes, please give it. It's like a it's like a

618
00:31:15,520 --> 00:31:19,240
Speaker 1: little little uh uh what's it called where you like

619
00:31:19,240 --> 00:31:20,880
Speaker 1: like you know those pigs that they put in like

620
00:31:20,960 --> 00:31:23,160
Speaker 1: the tubs, and it's like, let me give me your

621
00:31:23,200 --> 00:31:27,440
Speaker 1: liver after I grow you op is nothing but an

622
00:31:27,680 --> 00:31:31,280
Speaker 1: object to harvest organs from a meat factory.

623
00:31:31,360 --> 00:31:32,480
Speaker 3: If you will a.

624
00:31:32,320 --> 00:31:37,560
Speaker 1: Meat factory, give me your organ I want, and please

625
00:31:38,000 --> 00:31:42,240
Speaker 1: mix that with a you know, double shot of martini.

626
00:31:42,760 --> 00:31:45,360
Speaker 1: Give me a dirty Bertie. Give me a dirty Martini

627
00:31:45,560 --> 00:31:48,200
Speaker 1: and your liver. Please, that's not I want.

628
00:31:48,520 --> 00:31:49,760
Speaker 3: Now, that's my favorite drink.

629
00:31:50,440 --> 00:31:59,440
Speaker 1: A shaken, not stirred, filtered, not poisoned, live or not dead. Nice?

630
00:31:59,640 --> 00:32:03,120
Speaker 1: All right. The fact that she then spent seventeen years

631
00:32:03,160 --> 00:32:08,400
Speaker 1: bullying me is irrelevant because family and kids are a

632
00:32:08,400 --> 00:32:11,040
Speaker 1: gift from God. Well fuck them all. The doctor said

633
00:32:11,080 --> 00:32:13,880
Speaker 1: to me, Well, it is an increased risk, but your

634
00:32:13,880 --> 00:32:16,480
Speaker 1: mother needs a new liver. At least you don't risk

635
00:32:16,640 --> 00:32:21,640
Speaker 1: leaving children behind. Fuck that. I was so stunned I

636
00:32:21,720 --> 00:32:25,680
Speaker 1: forgot the entire Swedish language and just sat there. I'm guessing,

637
00:32:25,680 --> 00:32:28,600
Speaker 1: oh piece from sweetens. Ah, what did I just hear?

638
00:32:29,000 --> 00:32:30,480
Speaker 1: And who will care for my.

639
00:32:30,600 --> 00:32:31,600
Speaker 3: Pets if I die?

640
00:32:32,080 --> 00:32:36,680
Speaker 1: Oh? Pie's a dog ball? You know, babies, fir babies

641
00:32:36,960 --> 00:32:39,200
Speaker 1: and my mom, I gave.

642
00:32:39,000 --> 00:32:40,240
Speaker 3: You my life.

643
00:32:40,800 --> 00:32:44,000
Speaker 1: You should do the same for me. After all, I

644
00:32:44,120 --> 00:32:48,080
Speaker 1: gave you my best years and raising you wish no joab.

645
00:32:48,760 --> 00:32:52,680
Speaker 3: Yeah, well, guess what, You're a joke, Mama, You're a joke, mama.

646
00:32:53,000 --> 00:32:56,480
Speaker 1: Fucking guy ha. Hi on the deathbed, I want your

647
00:32:56,520 --> 00:33:00,440
Speaker 1: blood to fall through the bed and I want that

648
00:33:00,560 --> 00:33:04,480
Speaker 1: doctor to slip on the blood and you know what, Doc,

649
00:33:04,680 --> 00:33:07,560
Speaker 1: maybe maybe to cut out your liver while you're bleeding

650
00:33:07,560 --> 00:33:09,720
Speaker 1: out in the floor and give it to mom. Oh my,

651
00:33:10,440 --> 00:33:14,320
Speaker 1: I want that all down. Yeah. She also gave me

652
00:33:14,440 --> 00:33:18,200
Speaker 1: two fractured ribs and one time locked me out of

653
00:33:18,200 --> 00:33:20,800
Speaker 1: the house in the middle of winter and I had

654
00:33:20,840 --> 00:33:22,960
Speaker 1: to smash a window with my hand to get in.

655
00:33:23,240 --> 00:33:27,440
Speaker 1: Oh my god. So you can suffice to say, you know,

656
00:33:27,600 --> 00:33:30,160
Speaker 1: the relationship was great and OP should just get.

657
00:33:30,080 --> 00:33:31,520
Speaker 3: Over another of the Year award.

658
00:33:32,000 --> 00:33:35,080
Speaker 1: I can't believe I even tried that. I agreed to

659
00:33:35,120 --> 00:33:37,400
Speaker 1: be tested as a donor, as if she would have

660
00:33:37,600 --> 00:33:41,680
Speaker 1: magically changed. I'm leaving the city tonight, taking the train north,

661
00:33:41,840 --> 00:33:44,560
Speaker 1: and will hopefully be back in my cozy home tomorrow.

662
00:33:44,840 --> 00:33:47,840
Speaker 1: When the doctor calls to hear my decision, I might

663
00:33:47,960 --> 00:33:52,720
Speaker 1: not even pick up cold. And guess what, John what,

664
00:33:53,640 --> 00:33:58,640
Speaker 1: there's a freaking up date. Oh goodness, Oh wow. OP

665
00:33:58,800 --> 00:34:02,800
Speaker 1: sent an image of where they live and it's beautiful. Okay,

666
00:34:02,880 --> 00:34:05,680
Speaker 1: So I just wanted to write a short update. All right.

667
00:34:05,760 --> 00:34:08,600
Speaker 1: So I've spoken to the people involved, my mom, my siblings,

668
00:34:08,640 --> 00:34:11,080
Speaker 1: and the medical staff, and then told everyone that I

669
00:34:11,080 --> 00:34:14,279
Speaker 1: won't donate a part of my liver to my alcoholic mother.

670
00:34:14,640 --> 00:34:17,000
Speaker 1: A doctor at the hospital where my mother was treated

671
00:34:17,080 --> 00:34:20,960
Speaker 1: initially when her liver crash simply said, I understand, but

672
00:34:21,080 --> 00:34:23,719
Speaker 1: that also means that I must inform you you need

673
00:34:23,719 --> 00:34:26,040
Speaker 1: to prepare to say goodbye to her. In a not

674
00:34:26,239 --> 00:34:29,920
Speaker 1: so distant future. I might not particularly like my mother,

675
00:34:30,120 --> 00:34:33,520
Speaker 1: but I don't wish death on anyone, so that sucks.

676
00:34:33,680 --> 00:34:37,239
Speaker 1: But again, she drank her own liver away. It took

677
00:34:37,440 --> 00:34:39,440
Speaker 1: years of hard work to reach the place where she

678
00:34:39,560 --> 00:34:42,960
Speaker 1: is now. She's been to several clinics, gotten all sorts

679
00:34:43,000 --> 00:34:45,600
Speaker 1: of help. She would stay until they stopped treating her

680
00:34:45,640 --> 00:34:48,680
Speaker 1: with oxes canned, and then check out and start it

681
00:34:48,719 --> 00:34:51,799
Speaker 1: all over again. So much of the taxpayer's money has

682
00:34:51,840 --> 00:34:55,240
Speaker 1: been spent and thrown away on her, and she refuses

683
00:34:55,280 --> 00:34:57,600
Speaker 1: to take any responsibility at all. Basically, she has a

684
00:34:57,640 --> 00:35:01,040
Speaker 1: waste of money and a waste of way go. It's

685
00:35:01,120 --> 00:35:04,200
Speaker 1: always the nurses or the doctor's fault that she drinks.

686
00:35:04,480 --> 00:35:07,120
Speaker 1: They don't get they don't give me the right treatment.

687
00:35:07,719 --> 00:35:11,759
Speaker 1: Like all I need is a dirty part. She could

688
00:35:11,840 --> 00:35:18,080
Speaker 1: not stir it's erectly into the blood streets, the perfect Yeah,

689
00:35:18,560 --> 00:35:22,959
Speaker 1: just I know how herself better. I think she would

690
00:35:22,960 --> 00:35:26,239
Speaker 1: do the same to any donated liver. And I told

691
00:35:26,280 --> 00:35:29,480
Speaker 1: the doctor this. My sister said that she understood, and

692
00:35:29,560 --> 00:35:31,960
Speaker 1: now that things have had time to calm down a bit,

693
00:35:32,239 --> 00:35:34,399
Speaker 1: she even said that she thinks it's the right thing

694
00:35:34,440 --> 00:35:37,560
Speaker 1: to do. My brother does not agree. With my decision,

695
00:35:37,800 --> 00:35:41,800
Speaker 1: So maybe donate your own liver, bro, come on, yeah, God,

696
00:35:42,080 --> 00:35:43,920
Speaker 1: which actually he said, And I told him that he

697
00:35:43,960 --> 00:35:46,120
Speaker 1: can donate a nice size of his own liver then,

698
00:35:46,520 --> 00:35:48,880
Speaker 1: But then, of course he tells me he can't because

699
00:35:48,920 --> 00:35:51,600
Speaker 1: he's got kids and it's too much of a risk

700
00:35:51,640 --> 00:35:56,359
Speaker 1: for him. Bro, just because you have kids doesn't make

701
00:35:56,400 --> 00:35:59,399
Speaker 1: your life worth immediately more than mine.

702
00:35:59,640 --> 00:36:03,040
Speaker 3: Yeah, where's your nice cabin? You know what what have

703
00:36:03,160 --> 00:36:03,640
Speaker 3: you built?

704
00:36:03,960 --> 00:36:06,960
Speaker 1: Yeah? Where are your fur babies? Yeah? Come on. I,

705
00:36:07,320 --> 00:36:12,360
Speaker 1: on the other hand, and am obviously disposable God and

706
00:36:12,680 --> 00:36:16,160
Speaker 1: my mother, so I honestly can't be bothered to type

707
00:36:16,160 --> 00:36:18,440
Speaker 1: it out. I phoned her to tell her that she

708
00:36:18,480 --> 00:36:20,680
Speaker 1: will not be getting my liver, which is such a

709
00:36:20,680 --> 00:36:24,120
Speaker 1: weird tech staff to say, and as expected, she went

710
00:36:24,120 --> 00:36:27,000
Speaker 1: from jovial to resentful by the drop of a hat.

711
00:36:27,640 --> 00:36:34,520
Speaker 1: Everything from I'm your mother, you only get one mother too,

712
00:36:34,960 --> 00:36:38,840
Speaker 1: you must be there for family was thrown at me.

713
00:36:39,160 --> 00:36:41,640
Speaker 1: She even referred to the fact that I once risked

714
00:36:41,640 --> 00:36:43,840
Speaker 1: my life for my dog when she went through the

715
00:36:43,920 --> 00:36:47,279
Speaker 1: ice on a frozen leg. But you won't do this

716
00:36:47,360 --> 00:36:51,080
Speaker 1: for your mom, No, no, I will not. Actually, she

717
00:36:51,239 --> 00:36:54,040
Speaker 1: said many awful things. I guess I can understand that

718
00:36:54,080 --> 00:36:57,520
Speaker 1: she's upset and scared, but even I have a limit

719
00:36:57,719 --> 00:36:59,720
Speaker 1: to how much of that shit I'm willing to stand.

720
00:37:00,120 --> 00:37:04,920
Speaker 1: So eventually, I just said I'm done and I hung up.

721
00:37:06,120 --> 00:37:09,640
Speaker 1: Kick any clack, don't call back. Not sure what to

722
00:37:09,640 --> 00:37:12,600
Speaker 1: expect now, don't really care either. I'm glad that my

723
00:37:12,680 --> 00:37:15,560
Speaker 1: sister came around. Perhaps my brother will if given time.

724
00:37:16,160 --> 00:37:19,480
Speaker 1: Maybe not. Either way, I'm happy to have made my

725
00:37:19,560 --> 00:37:22,440
Speaker 1: decision clear. Now that it's done, I can get back

726
00:37:22,480 --> 00:37:25,400
Speaker 1: to enjoying my life far from the mall, in the

727
00:37:25,440 --> 00:37:29,480
Speaker 1: comfort of my home and the company of my awesome dogs.

728
00:37:29,880 --> 00:37:32,040
Speaker 3: Wow, well there, yeah, I have it.

729
00:37:32,320 --> 00:37:36,920
Speaker 2: My goodness, hope he's colder than an ice.

730
00:37:36,719 --> 00:37:39,080
Speaker 3: Liver fresh off the surgery.

731
00:37:39,000 --> 00:37:41,359
Speaker 1: Colder than her dog when it fell through the ice.

732
00:37:41,440 --> 00:37:44,600
Speaker 1: I mean, okay, So my question is if your parents

733
00:37:45,400 --> 00:37:49,200
Speaker 1: was dying of liver cancer, would you give your liver

734
00:37:49,280 --> 00:37:51,359
Speaker 1: to them? Let's say they don't have a drinking problem,

735
00:37:51,400 --> 00:37:54,279
Speaker 1: they just had liver cancer. R Would you give your

736
00:37:54,320 --> 00:37:56,960
Speaker 1: liver to your mom or dad? Me part of your

737
00:37:56,960 --> 00:37:58,879
Speaker 1: liver a slice? Yayah? Would you give your I want

738
00:37:58,880 --> 00:38:00,160
Speaker 1: to hear. I want to hear what everyone else The

739
00:38:00,200 --> 00:38:03,440
Speaker 1: comment size and why, but John, you would.

740
00:38:03,400 --> 00:38:06,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, like my mom is not like this mom,

741
00:38:06,960 --> 00:38:08,840
Speaker 2: like this mom is crazy.

742
00:38:08,920 --> 00:38:10,920
Speaker 3: Yeah, no, I would. I would definitely do it.

743
00:38:10,800 --> 00:38:12,719
Speaker 2: Is I actually never knew because I knew, like what

744
00:38:12,800 --> 00:38:15,760
Speaker 2: you have like two kidneys, so you can like remove

745
00:38:15,800 --> 00:38:18,520
Speaker 2: a kidney and you're fairly okay. I never knew you

746
00:38:18,560 --> 00:38:23,040
Speaker 2: could do part of a liver, Like that's so interesting.

747
00:38:23,200 --> 00:38:24,600
Speaker 1: You can't? Yeah you can.

748
00:38:25,080 --> 00:38:28,719
Speaker 2: I would personally do it, but I think I think

749
00:38:28,760 --> 00:38:31,600
Speaker 2: it's also an interesting scenario of like putting yourself in

750
00:38:31,680 --> 00:38:34,240
Speaker 2: opie shoes, of like, if this person is your mom,

751
00:38:34,719 --> 00:38:36,399
Speaker 2: would you do the same thing?

752
00:38:36,400 --> 00:38:39,480
Speaker 1: If this person is my mom? I wouldn't. If it

753
00:38:39,600 --> 00:38:43,400
Speaker 1: was my actual mom, I would if like like my

754
00:38:43,480 --> 00:38:45,759
Speaker 1: mom currently, I would. I would give her my liver.

755
00:38:45,960 --> 00:38:49,200
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, but where do you give your liver to

756
00:38:49,239 --> 00:38:52,040
Speaker 1: your mom? Put your answers for the comments and tell

757
00:38:52,120 --> 00:38:53,759
Speaker 1: us why. But you know what we love.

758
00:38:54,719 --> 00:38:58,960
Speaker 2: We love the thoughts and comments of our beautiful public subscribers.

759
00:38:59,320 --> 00:39:00,000
Speaker 3: Let me read a few.

760
00:39:00,480 --> 00:39:03,280
Speaker 2: These come from the video Sleeping with My Sister's Husband,

761
00:39:03,400 --> 00:39:08,000
Speaker 2: Psycho Roommates and Destroyed Marriages. This comment is from public

762
00:39:08,040 --> 00:39:09,640
Speaker 2: subscriber Twin Sisters.

763
00:39:10,120 --> 00:39:13,520
Speaker 3: Sam's voice is my only therapy.

764
00:39:13,960 --> 00:39:16,480
Speaker 1: Oh God, thank you very much.

765
00:39:16,560 --> 00:39:17,280
Speaker 3: Good gravy.

766
00:39:17,400 --> 00:39:22,760
Speaker 1: Let me just whisper nothing's sweet, nothing into your ear. Also,

767
00:39:22,920 --> 00:39:24,320
Speaker 1: I am recently.

768
00:39:23,840 --> 00:39:27,040
Speaker 3: Signured more reasons to flood.

769
00:39:26,800 --> 00:39:31,680
Speaker 1: Sam's signal, So please flood DMS at Samuel Donner.

770
00:39:31,760 --> 00:39:32,360
Speaker 3: Oh goodness.

771
00:39:33,200 --> 00:39:37,960
Speaker 2: Public public subscriber Kira red Holmes says I kicked my

772
00:39:38,239 --> 00:39:42,799
Speaker 2: twenty six cousin forty female out after a little over

773
00:39:42,880 --> 00:39:48,160
Speaker 2: a month from my house because she kept pushing my boundaries. Kira,

774
00:39:48,480 --> 00:39:50,239
Speaker 2: gotta set those boundaries.

775
00:39:49,800 --> 00:39:51,440
Speaker 1: For sure, set those boundaries.

776
00:39:51,440 --> 00:39:55,040
Speaker 2: Come on, especially, come on, you're you're forty, I'm twenty six, get.

777
00:39:54,680 --> 00:39:55,839
Speaker 3: Your own home, come on now.

778
00:39:57,560 --> 00:40:02,480
Speaker 2: And then finally, public subscrib were Lynn Perez op worker

779
00:40:02,880 --> 00:40:03,680
Speaker 2: was awesome.

780
00:40:04,360 --> 00:40:08,120
Speaker 3: Love it, Lynn, We love you and all of all.

781
00:40:08,160 --> 00:40:11,759
Speaker 2: We do amazing public subscribers, so publicly subscribe, drop a

782
00:40:11,800 --> 00:40:12,680
Speaker 2: comment and we just.

783
00:40:12,680 --> 00:40:13,880
Speaker 3: Might read it on the next story.

784
00:40:14,120 --> 00:40:15,320
Speaker 1: That way, will see.

785
00:40:22,800 --> 00:40:25,640
Speaker 2: My father sixty two male won't help my mom fifty

786
00:40:25,680 --> 00:40:29,560
Speaker 2: six female after major back surgery. Oh he blew that

787
00:40:29,640 --> 00:40:30,439
Speaker 2: back out for sure.

788
00:40:31,000 --> 00:40:33,920
Speaker 3: Sorry, momy, momy.

789
00:40:33,920 --> 00:40:36,880
Speaker 2: Uh where we're terrible, but you know he isn't terrible. Sam,

790
00:40:37,080 --> 00:40:41,680
Speaker 2: is this wonderful, wonderful op Funky Town Foggy.

791
00:40:41,920 --> 00:40:45,160
Speaker 1: Ooh, funky Town Foggy. That is a like, that's an

792
00:40:45,239 --> 00:40:48,440
Speaker 1: artist name right there from six pm to two am.

793
00:40:48,600 --> 00:40:53,200
Speaker 1: But you will have me as your DJO the fuck

794
00:40:53,760 --> 00:40:57,400
Speaker 1: on DJ Funky Down Foggy and let the spits of

795
00:40:57,680 --> 00:41:03,600
Speaker 1: records to make you feel fucking boo.

796
00:41:06,040 --> 00:41:08,200
Speaker 2: This is my first post ever, so I'm sorry if

797
00:41:08,200 --> 00:41:09,760
Speaker 2: there are formatting errors, Yeah.

798
00:41:09,640 --> 00:41:10,960
Speaker 3: You better apologize.

799
00:41:11,000 --> 00:41:15,720
Speaker 1: Hare are you come masters of grammar?

800
00:41:16,440 --> 00:41:17,400
Speaker 3: English language?

801
00:41:17,920 --> 00:41:21,000
Speaker 2: So, I, twenty one female and my sister nineteen female,

802
00:41:21,120 --> 00:41:24,279
Speaker 2: have been taking care of my mom after major back surgery.

803
00:41:24,440 --> 00:41:27,120
Speaker 3: She had a spinal fusion on five of.

804
00:41:27,080 --> 00:41:29,960
Speaker 2: Her vertebrae and this is one of the most intense

805
00:41:30,000 --> 00:41:33,560
Speaker 2: surgeries someone could have. Ye turn to your mom into

806
00:41:33,600 --> 00:41:41,400
Speaker 2: the termination over here exoskeleton. My mom has a degenerative

807
00:41:41,640 --> 00:41:46,400
Speaker 2: disc disease. Wow, that's that's just an interesting coupling of words.

808
00:41:46,560 --> 00:41:51,600
Speaker 3: Degenerative disc disease like I lo I low. You want

809
00:41:51,600 --> 00:41:54,200
Speaker 3: to make an album like a degenerative disc disease.

810
00:41:54,400 --> 00:41:56,200
Speaker 1: We're not making fun of your mom, not.

811
00:41:57,719 --> 00:41:59,600
Speaker 3: Just the name of the disease they picked.

812
00:42:00,040 --> 00:42:03,319
Speaker 1: How do we do that'll want to recuarmen and.

813
00:42:03,200 --> 00:42:08,040
Speaker 2: Her back deteriorated? So much that fusion was her only option.

814
00:42:08,400 --> 00:42:09,680
Speaker 2: The power of the sud.

815
00:42:12,040 --> 00:42:12,839
Speaker 3: What is that from?

816
00:42:13,160 --> 00:42:16,080
Speaker 1: It's from Spider Man too, when he makes a nuclear

817
00:42:16,120 --> 00:42:17,080
Speaker 1: fusion reactor.

818
00:42:19,840 --> 00:42:24,320
Speaker 3: Jesus Christ. That's a pretty good line, though, okay't lie.

819
00:42:25,200 --> 00:42:27,440
Speaker 2: She's been home for about a week now and all

820
00:42:27,560 --> 00:42:30,239
Speaker 2: the responsibility of taking care of her has fallen on

821
00:42:30,280 --> 00:42:33,279
Speaker 2: my sister and I. Currently, we work eight to four

822
00:42:33,400 --> 00:42:35,560
Speaker 2: at the same job, trying to save up money for

823
00:42:35,640 --> 00:42:38,640
Speaker 2: our next college semester. Then we come home and spend

824
00:42:38,719 --> 00:42:40,880
Speaker 2: the rest of the night taking care of our mom.

825
00:42:41,400 --> 00:42:44,520
Speaker 2: There's been multiple times where we have to come to

826
00:42:44,640 --> 00:42:48,160
Speaker 2: our mom being in intense pain because my dad didn't

827
00:42:48,200 --> 00:42:51,440
Speaker 2: change her ice pack for hours or left so she

828
00:42:51,520 --> 00:42:53,600
Speaker 2: didn't have anyone to help her or get her out

829
00:42:53,640 --> 00:42:54,120
Speaker 2: of her chair.

830
00:42:54,239 --> 00:42:57,080
Speaker 1: How is the dad like not doing anything? You are

831
00:42:57,360 --> 00:42:59,400
Speaker 1: the husband, you're supposed to You're supposed to be a

832
00:42:59,400 --> 00:43:04,000
Speaker 1: good hubby. Literally, God, I bought my girlfriend three jars

833
00:43:04,040 --> 00:43:06,600
Speaker 1: of arawon soup when she was sick.

834
00:43:07,320 --> 00:43:09,759
Speaker 3: Talk about it. Yeah, you can't even give her an

835
00:43:09,760 --> 00:43:10,319
Speaker 3: ice pack.

836
00:43:10,360 --> 00:43:11,640
Speaker 1: You can even give it an ice pack.

837
00:43:11,719 --> 00:43:14,640
Speaker 2: Oh, my mom cannot move without a walker and she

838
00:43:14,760 --> 00:43:16,920
Speaker 2: needs someone to help her get up. Me and my

839
00:43:16,960 --> 00:43:19,520
Speaker 2: sister are so stressed out right now, and my fear

840
00:43:19,600 --> 00:43:22,960
Speaker 2: is that our dad will continue to not take responsibility

841
00:43:22,960 --> 00:43:26,280
Speaker 2: for my mom and while we have to juggle school work,

842
00:43:26,400 --> 00:43:29,400
Speaker 2: my mom, and our personal lives. I have a Mexican

843
00:43:29,440 --> 00:43:32,040
Speaker 2: father and there's a very strong culture that the women

844
00:43:32,160 --> 00:43:34,000
Speaker 2: do all the work in the house. Me and my

845
00:43:34,080 --> 00:43:37,359
Speaker 2: sister have had multiple breakdowns due to the stress. I

846
00:43:37,400 --> 00:43:38,319
Speaker 2: can imagine.

847
00:43:38,520 --> 00:43:39,839
Speaker 1: Yeah, dude, this sounds rough.

848
00:43:39,920 --> 00:43:42,480
Speaker 2: My mom is not doing good either, and I frequently

849
00:43:42,520 --> 00:43:43,960
Speaker 2: see her screaming.

850
00:43:43,480 --> 00:43:44,279
Speaker 3: And crying in pain.

851
00:43:44,480 --> 00:43:45,600
Speaker 1: Oh that is awful.

852
00:43:46,200 --> 00:43:48,000
Speaker 2: I don't know how to help my mom more, and

853
00:43:48,040 --> 00:43:50,239
Speaker 2: I don't know how to cope with everything going on.

854
00:43:50,680 --> 00:43:52,919
Speaker 2: How do I make my dad help more? And how

855
00:43:52,960 --> 00:43:55,560
Speaker 2: do I handle the situation with my mom?

856
00:43:55,680 --> 00:43:57,799
Speaker 1: I mean, you have to have a like a sit

857
00:43:57,880 --> 00:44:01,839
Speaker 1: down conversation ASA truly, like this is something you got

858
00:44:01,880 --> 00:44:04,640
Speaker 1: to sit down and be like listen, like this this

859
00:44:04,920 --> 00:44:08,040
Speaker 1: is really big, Like this is you need to step

860
00:44:08,160 --> 00:44:11,520
Speaker 1: up as a husband, as like a husband, as you know.

861
00:44:11,880 --> 00:44:14,480
Speaker 1: I think like like what you're describing as maybe a

862
00:44:14,640 --> 00:44:17,799
Speaker 1: more macho culture and so maybe like play into that

863
00:44:17,880 --> 00:44:19,600
Speaker 1: where it's like you need to step up up, you

864
00:44:19,640 --> 00:44:21,839
Speaker 1: need to step up as a husband and as a man,

865
00:44:22,040 --> 00:44:23,799
Speaker 1: as like the man of the house, Like you need

866
00:44:23,840 --> 00:44:26,480
Speaker 1: to you need to be there as a protector and

867
00:44:26,560 --> 00:44:29,640
Speaker 1: as a provider. Yeah, and this is when she needs

868
00:44:29,640 --> 00:44:33,160
Speaker 1: you to provide and protect her most. Yeah, this is

869
00:44:33,200 --> 00:44:36,839
Speaker 1: what like, you know, your marriage vows are probably based on,

870
00:44:36,880 --> 00:44:39,040
Speaker 1: you know, in sickness and in health. And if if

871
00:44:39,080 --> 00:44:41,160
Speaker 1: you're not going to be there for her in sickness,

872
00:44:41,200 --> 00:44:43,480
Speaker 1: like who what kind of husband are you?

873
00:44:44,040 --> 00:44:46,719
Speaker 2: Yeah, there's actually someone h There was a few comments here,

874
00:44:47,239 --> 00:44:50,480
Speaker 2: one person who commented basically that, like, remind your dad

875
00:44:50,760 --> 00:44:53,319
Speaker 2: of the marriage vows for better for in sickness and

876
00:44:53,360 --> 00:44:53,759
Speaker 2: in health.

877
00:44:54,160 --> 00:44:54,520
Speaker 1: Yeah.

878
00:44:54,600 --> 00:44:57,239
Speaker 2: Literally, that's like part of the promise and there's a

879
00:44:57,320 --> 00:45:00,160
Speaker 2: quick exchange. I don't know much about this, but if

880
00:45:00,160 --> 00:45:01,759
Speaker 2: you can afford it, maybe get a nurse or have

881
00:45:01,800 --> 00:45:04,799
Speaker 2: a reliable family member look after your mom. You would

882
00:45:04,800 --> 00:45:06,520
Speaker 2: also have to sit down with your dad and have

883
00:45:06,560 --> 00:45:08,520
Speaker 2: a talk with him regarding your mother about how he

884
00:45:08,520 --> 00:45:11,200
Speaker 2: cannot continue to do this to you and his wife.

885
00:45:11,280 --> 00:45:13,919
Speaker 2: Hope this helps. I wish I could get a care nurse,

886
00:45:13,920 --> 00:45:16,040
Speaker 2: but we can't afford it. My dad is a bum

887
00:45:16,120 --> 00:45:18,479
Speaker 2: and barely works as is. It's just been a really

888
00:45:18,480 --> 00:45:22,000
Speaker 2: hard night and recovery for her is six months to

889
00:45:22,080 --> 00:45:22,800
Speaker 2: two years.

890
00:45:22,840 --> 00:45:23,040
Speaker 6: Wow.

891
00:45:23,080 --> 00:45:23,560
Speaker 4: Wow.

892
00:45:23,840 --> 00:45:26,319
Speaker 2: I've tried talking with him, I've yelled at him, but

893
00:45:26,360 --> 00:45:27,239
Speaker 2: he just doesn't get it.

894
00:45:27,280 --> 00:45:28,279
Speaker 3: I just don't know what to do.

895
00:45:28,600 --> 00:45:31,640
Speaker 2: Maybe try a neighbor that you know well or get

896
00:45:31,680 --> 00:45:33,239
Speaker 2: to know so that we could help you guys out.

897
00:45:33,800 --> 00:45:35,600
Speaker 2: I didn't think to try my neighbors. I don't know

898
00:45:35,600 --> 00:45:37,920
Speaker 2: them very well. But there's a family that lives across

899
00:45:37,960 --> 00:45:40,520
Speaker 2: the street. I can check up on her and see

900
00:45:40,520 --> 00:45:42,560
Speaker 2: if they can help. My dad does go back to

901
00:45:42,560 --> 00:45:44,920
Speaker 2: work next week and me and my sister go back

902
00:45:44,920 --> 00:45:47,040
Speaker 2: to school. We don't have any relatives in the area,

903
00:45:47,120 --> 00:45:49,759
Speaker 2: so it's hard to think of people to look after her. Yeah.

904
00:45:50,120 --> 00:45:51,759
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, that's really tough.

905
00:45:51,840 --> 00:45:53,880
Speaker 1: That's a super tough situation. I mean I think like

906
00:45:53,920 --> 00:45:55,920
Speaker 1: the sit down conversation with your dad is probably going

907
00:45:56,000 --> 00:45:59,800
Speaker 1: to be the best route. Yes, yeah, I understand maybe

908
00:46:00,080 --> 00:46:03,680
Speaker 1: nurses out of reach financially, but uh, you know, in

909
00:46:03,760 --> 00:46:06,719
Speaker 1: times of trouble, like if you have a family and

910
00:46:06,760 --> 00:46:11,880
Speaker 1: friends around, maybe don't lean on just one entirely, but

911
00:46:11,920 --> 00:46:14,040
Speaker 1: you could spread out some of that stuff and it's like, hey,

912
00:46:14,080 --> 00:46:16,560
Speaker 1: like I need I need help, Like you come in

913
00:46:16,719 --> 00:46:20,120
Speaker 1: like you know, maybe like once every two weeks or

914
00:46:20,160 --> 00:46:23,360
Speaker 1: something like you really build a schedule and friends just

915
00:46:23,400 --> 00:46:26,720
Speaker 1: help you out with this because you know, that's like that's.

916
00:46:26,520 --> 00:46:27,399
Speaker 3: What friends are for.

917
00:46:27,640 --> 00:46:31,480
Speaker 1: Literally, Yeah, and uh and if you know they if

918
00:46:31,480 --> 00:46:34,279
Speaker 1: they care, maybe maybe you can have a little bit

919
00:46:34,320 --> 00:46:38,160
Speaker 1: of help through this. But yeah, man, this is this

920
00:46:38,239 --> 00:46:40,280
Speaker 1: is tough. This is a tough situation and stuff.

921
00:46:40,400 --> 00:46:41,920
Speaker 3: Yeah, definitely wishing the best for you.

922
00:46:42,160 --> 00:46:44,439
Speaker 1: Yeah, ope, really wish you that. Thank you for sharing

923
00:46:44,440 --> 00:46:46,719
Speaker 1: your story. Yeah, I really appreciate it. And please keep

924
00:46:46,800 --> 00:46:48,120
Speaker 1: us updated on how your mom's doing.

925
00:46:48,200 --> 00:46:49,239
Speaker 3: Yes, please do please do.

926
00:46:49,520 --> 00:46:52,759
Speaker 1: This feels inappropriate, But if you have other stories that

927
00:46:52,800 --> 00:46:54,440
Speaker 1: you want to tell, or anyone.

928
00:46:54,239 --> 00:46:56,360
Speaker 3: Let's give some advice you know you want to.

929
00:46:57,080 --> 00:46:59,759
Speaker 2: Honestly, it's great to see other people sharing, like in

930
00:46:59,800 --> 00:47:01,480
Speaker 2: the like, Yeah, we.

931
00:47:01,400 --> 00:47:04,640
Speaker 1: Like seeing the community supporting the community exactly. If anyone

932
00:47:04,640 --> 00:47:06,680
Speaker 1: else has any stories that they want to share, go

933
00:47:06,719 --> 00:47:08,799
Speaker 1: to our slash Okop show and we will read them.

934
00:47:08,800 --> 00:47:10,839
Speaker 1: Please do okop.

935
00:47:11,800 --> 00:47:14,680
Speaker 3: Am I the a hole if I send my parents

936
00:47:14,719 --> 00:47:15,320
Speaker 3: to jail?

937
00:47:15,640 --> 00:47:20,439
Speaker 1: Oh my god? Yeah yes maybe yeah, I mean said

938
00:47:20,480 --> 00:47:24,040
Speaker 1: your parents, Well hold on, hold on, let's yeah, but

939
00:47:24,120 --> 00:47:26,880
Speaker 1: you're not winning any awards for like best son or

940
00:47:26,960 --> 00:47:29,200
Speaker 1: daughter here if you said your parents to jail.

941
00:47:30,200 --> 00:47:34,080
Speaker 2: My twenty nine female parents have always been in financial trouble,

942
00:47:34,239 --> 00:47:37,160
Speaker 2: something that I have never been able to understand because

943
00:47:37,200 --> 00:47:40,640
Speaker 2: they both have a really generous salary, more than three

944
00:47:40,680 --> 00:47:41,880
Speaker 2: times my own salary.

945
00:47:41,920 --> 00:47:43,960
Speaker 1: That could be big. That could be big, right, yeah,

946
00:47:44,040 --> 00:47:45,840
Speaker 1: I mean, well it depends. I don't know. There's like

947
00:47:45,840 --> 00:47:49,239
Speaker 1: twenty nine year olds that are janitors and then there's

948
00:47:49,280 --> 00:47:51,359
Speaker 1: twenty nine year olds that are lawyers that are Yeah,

949
00:47:51,800 --> 00:47:53,640
Speaker 1: so there's somewhere between a janitor.

950
00:47:53,840 --> 00:47:55,520
Speaker 3: Probably safe to say it's it's a lot.

951
00:47:55,680 --> 00:47:58,880
Speaker 2: Because of these financial troubles, my aunts, uncles and grandma

952
00:47:59,160 --> 00:48:01,880
Speaker 2: have all asked my parents to lend them money. We

953
00:48:01,880 --> 00:48:04,600
Speaker 2: were evicted a couple of times that I know, and

954
00:48:04,719 --> 00:48:07,720
Speaker 2: we've had the water, electricity, and internet cut.

955
00:48:07,719 --> 00:48:11,120
Speaker 1: Wait what that's no good? No bueno, no bueno, bueno

956
00:48:11,239 --> 00:48:11,839
Speaker 1: no no no.

957
00:48:11,960 --> 00:48:14,200
Speaker 2: And many of these things over the year, I admit,

958
00:48:14,400 --> 00:48:16,439
Speaker 2: have affected my emotional and mental health.

959
00:48:16,520 --> 00:48:17,839
Speaker 3: I get it, op, Like, bro.

960
00:48:17,840 --> 00:48:22,120
Speaker 1: If your water's gonna shift turn, I'm gonna raise being evicted.

961
00:48:22,239 --> 00:48:23,719
Speaker 3: Yeah, child.

962
00:48:25,840 --> 00:48:29,160
Speaker 2: All of this understandably made my relationship with my parents

963
00:48:29,440 --> 00:48:32,520
Speaker 2: very difficult over the years, and even more so when

964
00:48:32,520 --> 00:48:35,719
Speaker 2: they would take advantage of me paying for things with

965
00:48:35,760 --> 00:48:38,719
Speaker 2: the money that I was earning during the holidays to

966
00:48:38,760 --> 00:48:42,920
Speaker 2: pay for college, or making me call my grandma to

967
00:48:43,000 --> 00:48:44,120
Speaker 2: ask her for money.

968
00:48:44,560 --> 00:48:47,319
Speaker 1: Oh, so they're sending the ope out.

969
00:48:47,400 --> 00:48:51,040
Speaker 2: Basically, the family exactly beg for the family and all

970
00:48:51,080 --> 00:48:53,719
Speaker 2: of this while my mom used to spend money on

971
00:48:54,040 --> 00:48:56,560
Speaker 2: whatever she wanted pursus jewelry.

972
00:48:57,040 --> 00:49:01,919
Speaker 1: Bro that's why they're having financial trouble. Three times their salary. Yeah,

973
00:49:02,000 --> 00:49:04,120
Speaker 1: they're bad, those Gucci bag.

974
00:49:06,760 --> 00:49:08,280
Speaker 3: Louis.

975
00:49:13,440 --> 00:49:16,200
Speaker 2: So the moment I became an adult, they started to

976
00:49:16,400 --> 00:49:20,080
Speaker 2: sign bills under my name without my permission.

977
00:49:20,160 --> 00:49:20,719
Speaker 1: Bruh.

978
00:49:20,800 --> 00:49:23,520
Speaker 3: And this was most Can you imagine your parents doing that?

979
00:49:23,680 --> 00:49:26,799
Speaker 1: I can, And well, I mean not that I can, like, no, no, no,

980
00:49:26,960 --> 00:49:30,400
Speaker 1: my parents would never do that, But in imagining it

981
00:49:30,440 --> 00:49:32,319
Speaker 1: makes me very sad. I can empathize.

982
00:49:32,400 --> 00:49:35,319
Speaker 2: They did this because their credit was so bad the

983
00:49:35,360 --> 00:49:38,560
Speaker 2: companies literally wouldn't allow them to sign their own names.

984
00:49:38,680 --> 00:49:41,120
Speaker 2: When I figured this out, I asked them to stop,

985
00:49:41,239 --> 00:49:43,960
Speaker 2: but they just lied and just told me to let

986
00:49:44,000 --> 00:49:46,000
Speaker 2: it go because I couldn't deal with it.

987
00:49:46,440 --> 00:49:48,799
Speaker 3: Let it go, excuse me, you let it go?

988
00:49:49,040 --> 00:49:52,560
Speaker 1: Uh go? I have two lines for you. Let it go,

989
00:49:53,520 --> 00:50:11,040
Speaker 1: let it go, lock the door. I don't care. Rah,

990
00:50:11,200 --> 00:50:11,919
Speaker 1: what a great song.

991
00:50:12,080 --> 00:50:15,080
Speaker 2: Fa'st forward to the present because of the whole rona situation.

992
00:50:15,320 --> 00:50:17,520
Speaker 2: I was looking forward to the money from my tax

993
00:50:17,560 --> 00:50:20,680
Speaker 2: return because my salary has gone down because of the

994
00:50:20,680 --> 00:50:23,319
Speaker 2: whole situation, so this money would help a lot. But

995
00:50:23,920 --> 00:50:27,680
Speaker 2: instead of getting my tax return, guess what I got?

996
00:50:28,080 --> 00:50:30,759
Speaker 1: What?

997
00:50:36,520 --> 00:50:38,680
Speaker 3: By the way, editors, Yeah, I know you already hate us.

998
00:50:38,760 --> 00:50:42,759
Speaker 3: Just connect the last paragraph to uh, look at the notion.

999
00:50:42,920 --> 00:50:43,600
Speaker 3: Just figure it out.

1000
00:50:44,560 --> 00:50:45,120
Speaker 1: Bruh.

1001
00:50:45,200 --> 00:50:47,880
Speaker 2: Not only did I not get the return, I received

1002
00:50:47,960 --> 00:50:52,920
Speaker 2: a letter from the courthouse saying that my money has

1003
00:50:52,960 --> 00:50:53,839
Speaker 2: been confiscated.

1004
00:50:54,000 --> 00:50:54,280
Speaker 1: No.

1005
00:50:54,520 --> 00:50:56,960
Speaker 2: I immediately phoned my mom and she said that she

1006
00:50:57,000 --> 00:50:58,239
Speaker 2: didn't know anything about it.

1007
00:50:59,520 --> 00:51:01,800
Speaker 1: These are the worse parents. They remind me of freaking

1008
00:51:01,840 --> 00:51:06,759
Speaker 1: Harry Potter step parents, you know, like like like the

1009
00:51:06,840 --> 00:51:11,280
Speaker 1: Dursleys forced Harry Potter to live under That was foul.

1010
00:51:11,360 --> 00:51:12,320
Speaker 3: That was foul.

1011
00:51:12,360 --> 00:51:15,040
Speaker 1: That was wicked, bunch of bull shit.

1012
00:51:15,600 --> 00:51:18,440
Speaker 2: Since I didn't trust my mom, I called the court myself,

1013
00:51:18,640 --> 00:51:21,239
Speaker 2: and they explained to me that during the last year

1014
00:51:21,480 --> 00:51:25,000
Speaker 2: there has been a process against me by a company

1015
00:51:25,080 --> 00:51:28,400
Speaker 2: that I owe money from unpaid bills. All the papers

1016
00:51:28,440 --> 00:51:31,560
Speaker 2: had been sent to my parents and they had them

1017
00:51:31,800 --> 00:51:34,640
Speaker 2: sign it, not me. The debt was not paid from

1018
00:51:34,680 --> 00:51:38,520
Speaker 2: the money from my tax income return, so now part

1019
00:51:38,560 --> 00:51:42,080
Speaker 2: of my salary will be confiscated until the debt.

1020
00:51:41,880 --> 00:51:42,680
Speaker 3: Is fully paid.

1021
00:51:42,920 --> 00:51:46,479
Speaker 2: My parents stole my identity to contract a bill under

1022
00:51:46,520 --> 00:51:49,040
Speaker 2: my name, didn't pay for it, and when the company

1023
00:51:49,080 --> 00:51:51,640
Speaker 2: tried to claim the debt through lawyers and a judge,

1024
00:51:51,680 --> 00:51:54,160
Speaker 2: they literally kept all of the papers from me, which

1025
00:51:54,200 --> 00:51:57,200
Speaker 2: is illegal, apparently waiting for it to be fixed all

1026
00:51:57,239 --> 00:51:59,480
Speaker 2: by itself. So they were basically like, let's just put

1027
00:51:59,480 --> 00:52:01,239
Speaker 2: it under the rug as much as we can until

1028
00:52:01,280 --> 00:52:02,600
Speaker 2: it all gets sorted magically.

1029
00:52:02,760 --> 00:52:06,759
Speaker 3: Bish, where's that money coming from your daughter?

1030
00:52:07,160 --> 00:52:10,719
Speaker 2: And my mother said that it was her right to

1031
00:52:10,840 --> 00:52:14,040
Speaker 2: put my name under their bills because I am her

1032
00:52:14,160 --> 00:52:16,759
Speaker 2: daughter and it is my duty to help with the

1033
00:52:16,800 --> 00:52:17,640
Speaker 2: family burdens.

1034
00:52:17,960 --> 00:52:19,960
Speaker 1: But brug, you're creating the burden.

1035
00:52:20,080 --> 00:52:23,600
Speaker 2: Since then, and after really nasty words from her side

1036
00:52:23,640 --> 00:52:26,640
Speaker 2: and my sisters, who, by the way says I'm ungrateful

1037
00:52:26,680 --> 00:52:29,440
Speaker 2: and selfish, I haven't spoke to them, and I'm in

1038
00:52:29,480 --> 00:52:33,560
Speaker 2: the middle of a global pandemic with my salary already low, paying.

1039
00:52:33,320 --> 00:52:34,680
Speaker 3: A debt that is not mine.

1040
00:52:34,960 --> 00:52:37,359
Speaker 2: My friends and boyfriends say that I should talk with

1041
00:52:37,400 --> 00:52:40,759
Speaker 2: the police and stop all of this. Otherwise they're just

1042
00:52:40,800 --> 00:52:44,040
Speaker 2: gonna keep doing it, and honestly, I'm afraid they will.

1043
00:52:44,320 --> 00:52:46,800
Speaker 2: So am I the a hole if I speak with

1044
00:52:46,920 --> 00:52:48,640
Speaker 2: the court to put my parents in jail.

1045
00:52:48,840 --> 00:52:52,560
Speaker 3: Even though my parents seventy and sixty three would go

1046
00:52:52,600 --> 00:52:53,200
Speaker 3: to the clinker.

1047
00:52:53,320 --> 00:52:55,040
Speaker 1: I think you gotta put them in the clink. Someone

1048
00:52:55,080 --> 00:52:58,239
Speaker 1: in the chat says, no, push ninja, what are you

1049
00:52:58,280 --> 00:53:00,840
Speaker 1: talking about. You're not gonna thick it to the parrots.

1050
00:53:01,280 --> 00:53:03,480
Speaker 1: Why you some kind of mama's button, mama's but.

1051
00:53:05,520 --> 00:53:05,800
Speaker 5: Heym.

1052
00:53:06,040 --> 00:53:10,359
Speaker 3: Where's the Fanta Genie? Come on, man, come on, I

1053
00:53:10,480 --> 00:53:10,960
Speaker 3: want my.

1054
00:53:11,040 --> 00:53:14,239
Speaker 2: Gor con though I've been moving boxes all day, my

1055
00:53:14,640 --> 00:53:17,880
Speaker 2: fifty pounds of meats pepperoni.

1056
00:53:18,400 --> 00:53:19,960
Speaker 1: Where's the coup of good?

1057
00:53:20,440 --> 00:53:22,360
Speaker 3: Well that's one episode.

1058
00:53:24,160 --> 00:53:25,520
Speaker 1: We forgot to clap think at the beginning.

1059
00:53:25,400 --> 00:53:30,240
Speaker 3: Yeah we do three what bro Yeah, hit the guys,

1060
00:53:30,480 --> 00:53:34,480
Speaker 3: hit the freaking likey liky buttons.