WEBVTT - Why the Hell Would Anyone Steal That!? 

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<v Speaker 1>Why the hell would anyone steal that? It's one more Thing.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm strong and getty one more thing. Before we get

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<v Speaker 1>to that. On our first One More Thing of the

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<v Speaker 1>New year, I had several people tell me that they

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<v Speaker 1>really enjoy the One More Thing podcast. I lovely and

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<v Speaker 1>a couple of people that became aware of it by

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<v Speaker 1>listening to the best of stuff on the radio while

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<v Speaker 1>we're off for two weeks, because producer Mike Hansen put

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<v Speaker 1>some of the One More Thing podcast on the radio

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<v Speaker 1>stations that were doing best of and so some people

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<v Speaker 1>got introduced to it. So that's cool. A couple of

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<v Speaker 1>quick things before I get to a couple of stories

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<v Speaker 1>came across this shit. Wow.

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<v Speaker 2>See that's one of the things about the One More

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<v Speaker 2>Thing podcasts. Sometimes there are swears, although now Hanson has

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<v Speaker 2>to label it so he doesn't rund it on the

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<v Speaker 2>air uncensored.

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<v Speaker 1>First one of twenty five.

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<v Speaker 2>Michael Boy, Sorry, that was childish and I regret it.

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<v Speaker 1>It was very childish. I loved it.

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<v Speaker 2>Tell you what your inner child leaves town, you're screwed.

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<v Speaker 2>I keep mine the healthy.

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<v Speaker 1>It reminds me. We so one of the fun things

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<v Speaker 1>we did a cousin Christmas. We call it where everybody

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<v Speaker 1>gets together, my brothers, their families, kids, cousins, grandma and grandpa, everybody,

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<v Speaker 1>we're there. We did a hot sauce competition based on

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<v Speaker 1>the what's that TV show? Hot One? Hot Ones? Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>so you can buy the home version of Hot Ones

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<v Speaker 1>and we watch Have you ever watched Hot Ones? Joe?

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<v Speaker 2>I have not.

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<v Speaker 1>It's pretty entertaining. Watched the Shack episode if you don't

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<v Speaker 1>watch anything else, because it's pretty funny. Yeah. They have

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<v Speaker 1>celebrities on there and then the interview them while they

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<v Speaker 1>try increasingly hot hot sauce with chips.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, Shack is stupid. That sounds really entertaining.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh, I haven't seen Conan's great funny. Shack is hilarious.

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<v Speaker 1>Guzzle and milk. They have milk there to drink, and

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<v Speaker 1>I mean, like crazy, I don't like spicy stuff, so

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<v Speaker 1>I don't get any joy out of it. I didn't

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<v Speaker 1>even participate, but everybody else did. Most everybody else did.

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<v Speaker 1>It was pretty funny, including my my my thirteen year

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<v Speaker 1>old Henry. He did the hottest one, the two million,

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<v Speaker 1>whatever that number is. They got a scale right, and

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<v Speaker 1>it was the hottest one that they had. Yeah, candle power. Anyway,

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<v Speaker 1>he was just he ran into the bathroom. We just

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<v Speaker 1>heard him in there and he yelled God damn. Oh

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<v Speaker 1>that got big laughs out of everyone. Boy, it must

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<v Speaker 1>be a guy thing.

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<v Speaker 3>My husband we bought that hot ones thing and he

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<v Speaker 3>did it with one of his friends and he completed it.

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<v Speaker 3>He walked around like he just hulk smashed a building.

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<v Speaker 3>Like he was like, yeah, it was like the biggest

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<v Speaker 3>testosterone boost I've ever seen in my life.

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<v Speaker 1>I guess it is a certain can you take it? Thing?

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<v Speaker 1>Because my brother the you know, served in Iraq several times.

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<v Speaker 1>Guy really likes taking on the hot sauce.

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<v Speaker 2>Wow, how interesting?

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<v Speaker 1>Uh? What was I leading up to? Oh? These couple

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<v Speaker 1>of things I came across, I don't know, they don't

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<v Speaker 1>fit in. I'll do that.

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<v Speaker 2>I was gonna say, you know, I walk around with

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<v Speaker 2>crippling joint pain all the time. So I'm good, Frankly,

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<v Speaker 2>you burn your mouth with hot sauce. I'm good over here.

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<v Speaker 2>I got my thing.

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<v Speaker 1>You got you.

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<v Speaker 2>It's always don't see the appeal.

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<v Speaker 1>It's always seemed a little bit to me like I'll

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<v Speaker 1>take these players and pinch you really hard? Is it here?

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<v Speaker 1>How about I pinch you here really hard.

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<v Speaker 2>Wow can hold her hand over a burner loss, although

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<v Speaker 2>you're not going to give yourself third degree burns obviously

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<v Speaker 2>with hot sauce.

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<v Speaker 1>So the the Hot Sauce game thing came with a

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<v Speaker 1>stack of cards and questions on them, and the way

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<v Speaker 1>you're supposed to play the game is you can either

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<v Speaker 1>answer the question or eat the hot sauce. And the

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<v Speaker 1>questions are like embarrassing or revealing. So it's kind of

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<v Speaker 1>a you know, thirteen year old. Now we've reached it

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<v Speaker 1>worked up to the really hot hot sauce, and here's

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<v Speaker 1>the question. The questions were way too filthy and dirty.

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<v Speaker 1>My son chose poorly. I should have looked at the

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<v Speaker 1>box before we bought it at Target. I was looking

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<v Speaker 1>through it. I mean, just like this is for early

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<v Speaker 1>twenty something drunk people sitting around. I mean, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>what was your worst one night stand? And just you know,

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<v Speaker 1>just stuff like that, a lot of them. But I

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<v Speaker 1>dug out for parenting. I dug out a bunch of

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<v Speaker 1>the questions that were okay for the family and parenting,

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<v Speaker 1>and then we did those and we didn't end up

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<v Speaker 1>doing them for the Hot saucing. We just tried the

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<v Speaker 1>hot sauce on chips. But this was just conversation starters.

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<v Speaker 1>I just needed something we got. We're all sitting around

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<v Speaker 1>and after like the initial I don't know if anybody

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<v Speaker 1>else has I've ever had this happen before, but get

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<v Speaker 1>all the family together and everything like that, and there's

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<v Speaker 1>a big burst of energy. Then that kind of a

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<v Speaker 1>bit of a lull happens, and now we got to

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<v Speaker 1>come up with something we gotta Well, first of you,

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<v Speaker 1>of all, you go out to eat like nine times,

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<v Speaker 1>but when you can't constantly go out to eat, so

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<v Speaker 1>he gets so.

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<v Speaker 2>So many cookies. I am now a cookie addict. Oh lord.

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<v Speaker 1>So I dug out some of the questions and what

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<v Speaker 1>was the one I was going to do before I

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<v Speaker 1>get to the final one? Oh, this is a pretty

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<v Speaker 1>decent one. It was kind of interesting because I'm there

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<v Speaker 1>as a parent with my kids, and then my parents

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<v Speaker 1>were there with their kids and grandkids, and the question

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<v Speaker 1>was what trait would you least like to pass down

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<v Speaker 1>to your kids?

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<v Speaker 2>Oh that's heavy.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, but I thought it was damned interesting. Again with

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<v Speaker 1>the family relations there. It was interesting me because my

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<v Speaker 1>dad said, patience, I wish I I wish I had

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<v Speaker 1>more patience. I don't have much patience. I never have

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<v Speaker 1>and I don't like that, and I wouldn't want to

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<v Speaker 1>pass that along. And I thought, huh, I've kind of

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<v Speaker 1>got that patience. I've got different things that bothered me

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<v Speaker 1>more than that. But like, my son really has no patience.

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<v Speaker 1>So and I have no idea if that's a genetic

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<v Speaker 1>thing or not.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, a lot of it is.

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<v Speaker 1>What would your answer be.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh, my god, mine, that might be it. Uh yeah, yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>it would be something like that. Yeah, just patience, ability

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<v Speaker 2>to look, you can make your point later. I'm thinking

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<v Speaker 2>back to you know, I was a young parent and

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<v Speaker 2>ran a little hot and there were times it took

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<v Speaker 2>me a while to learn. Look, you can't make the

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<v Speaker 2>point tonight with your angry, misbehaving kid. Just plant the seed,

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<v Speaker 2>throw a little fertilizer on it, and just leave it alone.

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<v Speaker 2>And don't you know, don't try to close the deal

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<v Speaker 2>with a kid who's freaking out or whatever. Just let

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<v Speaker 2>it rest. Something like that. Just I don't know how

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<v Speaker 2>it'd phrase it exactly. Give me a minute, I could

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<v Speaker 2>probably come up with it.

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<v Speaker 1>But it was interesting to have, you know, hear my

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<v Speaker 1>dad say it. With me there and then I've got

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<v Speaker 1>one from my mind was procrastination. I just I don't

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<v Speaker 1>I wouldn't want to pass that on to my kids,

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<v Speaker 1>and I have to one of them, but not the

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<v Speaker 1>other one. So that's cool, Katie. Since you're planning to

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<v Speaker 1>have a family, what trade of years would you not

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<v Speaker 1>like to pass along?

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<v Speaker 3>I would say my anxiety or my lack of ability

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<v Speaker 3>to identify what's in my control, Like I tend to

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<v Speaker 3>worry about things that I can't do anything about.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I was going to bring that up on the air.

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<v Speaker 1>I was interesting with a very big group of people

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<v Speaker 1>and like the weather conditions getting worse, there the different

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<v Speaker 1>levels of being worried about it, given that the result

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<v Speaker 1>is going to be the same either way, the person

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<v Speaker 1>that worries zero about it or the person that is

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<v Speaker 1>and I'm not going to mention any names, infinitely worried

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<v Speaker 1>about it, like to a really high point, the result

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<v Speaker 1>will be the same way, the same either way, which

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<v Speaker 1>is very interesting about worry and.

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<v Speaker 2>The challenge in front of you will be the same.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, and not to be too much of a downer.

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<v Speaker 1>Is like my son who's got a variety of issues.

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<v Speaker 1>He said, I don't want to pass along my OCD,

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<v Speaker 1>which was Michael, anything you don't want to pass along

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<v Speaker 1>to your cats?

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<v Speaker 4>Done? No, Maybe jealousy sometimes you get jealous of others

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<v Speaker 4>a little bit.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh, a little bit envious. Interesting, that's a good one man. Yeah. Yeah.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh, speaking of cats, Michael, for what it's worth, our

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<v Speaker 2>daughter brought her cats with her and they have been

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<v Speaker 2>were in my home.

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<v Speaker 1>For gosh, when did she get here? I know there's

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<v Speaker 1>an s on there, is it? Two or fifteen?

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<v Speaker 2>Two?

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<v Speaker 1>Okay?

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<v Speaker 2>Two cats, brothers, very very cute little fellas.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh my gosh.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm at least provisionally, I'm not on team cat like

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<v Speaker 2>versus dog. But I had a lot of fun with

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<v Speaker 2>the cats, really enjoyed their company fellas.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh my gosh.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 1>And then so one more card and this will be

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<v Speaker 1>the end of the One More Thing podcast for today.

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<v Speaker 1>The question was have you ever shoplifted? And there are

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<v Speaker 1>only two people that had in our big group. I

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<v Speaker 1>never have. Maybe we answered some questions here, Michael, have

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<v Speaker 1>you ever shoplifted?

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<v Speaker 3>No, Katie, No on accident, but no on accident. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 3>I walked out of it. I walked out of a

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<v Speaker 3>target with a parasun glasses on my head and when

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<v Speaker 3>I got realized it, drove back, returned them, got a

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<v Speaker 3>crazy look.

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<v Speaker 2>That's sent in mind. It is. Yes, absolutely, as a kid,

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<v Speaker 2>I fell under the sway of some older boys who

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<v Speaker 2>were not a good influence at all. I was probably

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<v Speaker 2>eight years old, I might have been nine something like that,

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<v Speaker 2>and there's some of the neighborhood boys and they kind

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<v Speaker 2>of adopted me and that's what they're doing, and I'm like,

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<v Speaker 2>all right. It was a good learning experience, though it

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<v Speaker 2>honestly was because the because we got busted because we

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<v Speaker 2>were stupid kids, and the whatever you call the security

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<v Speaker 2>guy at the stag prevention Uh, yeah, exactly, that's the

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<v Speaker 2>term I was looking for, chewed us out. I mean,

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<v Speaker 2>like really till there were tears. And then mom and

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<v Speaker 2>dad came and it was like oh And at that

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<v Speaker 2>young age, I hadn't fully appreciated that I am a

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<v Speaker 2>extension of my parents and my siblings and my family.

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<v Speaker 2>And we have a joke I probably shouldn't do the

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<v Speaker 2>accent we do it in but as our kids embark

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<v Speaker 2>on something, they will say to each other, we will

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<v Speaker 2>say to them, bring pot pride to family. And it

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<v Speaker 2>helped me really appreciate that.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, that's a good one. That's a good thing. It

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<v Speaker 1>didn't happen in you know, modern California up until a

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<v Speaker 1>month ago, that nobody would have busted you, you know.

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<v Speaker 2>Just all right, could Yeah, built a career as a criminal,

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<v Speaker 2>probably a very successful career. So one more thought on

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<v Speaker 2>the hot sauce thing. While I do not find any

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<v Speaker 2>joy in seeing who can endure the most pain to

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<v Speaker 2>their nerve endings in their mouth, the idea of trying

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<v Speaker 2>to maintain your cool and like speak coherently while you

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<v Speaker 2>are dealing with the hot sauce that is very funny.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's why. Yeah, that's why that

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<v Speaker 1>show is funny. Just google the Shack episode, watch it.

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<v Speaker 1>So on the did you shoplift? Two people in the

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<v Speaker 1>group of everybody said yes. My one niece said yes,

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<v Speaker 1>and we're all shocked, and and she said, yeah, she

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<v Speaker 1>kind of does it for fun. And I have a

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<v Speaker 1>friend who, like super successful. It's a very smart person

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<v Speaker 1>who who went through a big shoplifting phase in their

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<v Speaker 1>twenties and it was just the thrill of it. That

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<v Speaker 1>wasn't stuff they needed or anything. They got like a

0:11:22.440 --> 0:11:24.280
<v Speaker 1>thrill out of it. It's like people who lie for

0:11:24.360 --> 0:11:27.920
<v Speaker 1>the thrill of it or whatever. So I've never had that.

0:11:28.720 --> 0:11:33.080
<v Speaker 1>But then my dad shockingly said I did once. I

0:11:33.160 --> 0:11:35.600
<v Speaker 1>did once, And it was like, for some reason, my dad,

0:11:35.679 --> 0:11:40.720
<v Speaker 1>now that he's eighty seven, tell stories that he's never

0:11:40.800 --> 0:11:42.400
<v Speaker 1>told ever in his life. And I don't know if

0:11:42.400 --> 0:11:45.480
<v Speaker 1>he didn't think we could handle it or what, but

0:11:45.640 --> 0:11:48.160
<v Speaker 1>he tells stories now that we're like my brothers and

0:11:48.200 --> 0:11:50.520
<v Speaker 1>I are always like where, why were you holding onto

0:11:50.520 --> 0:11:51.360
<v Speaker 1>this your whole life?

0:11:51.720 --> 0:11:54.240
<v Speaker 2>Right? I had that experience with my eighty four year

0:11:54.240 --> 0:11:57.200
<v Speaker 2>old dad this past summer. He was in the Air

0:11:57.200 --> 0:12:01.080
<v Speaker 2>Force during the Vietnam War and he got out in

0:12:01.120 --> 0:12:05.720
<v Speaker 2>the early seventies, and he explained because he'd quote unquote

0:12:05.720 --> 0:12:08.840
<v Speaker 2>explained why to me earlier in my life, but he'd

0:12:08.880 --> 0:12:11.520
<v Speaker 2>left out like a lot of it, which was he

0:12:11.640 --> 0:12:15.760
<v Speaker 2>was fully cognizant of how dishonest the Department of Defense

0:12:15.960 --> 0:12:18.360
<v Speaker 2>and the White House were being about the war and.

0:12:18.280 --> 0:12:21.160
<v Speaker 1>He hated it. Wow, that's interesting.

0:12:20.760 --> 0:12:22.920
<v Speaker 2>And he'd never uttered a word of that to me.

0:12:24.040 --> 0:12:28.680
<v Speaker 1>That is interesting. Yeah, So my dad says I did once,

0:12:28.760 --> 0:12:32.480
<v Speaker 1>and we're all like what. Because my dad is super honest,

0:12:32.559 --> 0:12:37.000
<v Speaker 1>law and order guy, which I really appreciate, And he said, Yeah,

0:12:37.000 --> 0:12:40.000
<v Speaker 1>I was in the army and I was working KP

0:12:40.280 --> 0:12:42.719
<v Speaker 1>in the kitchen and I stole something out of the

0:12:42.800 --> 0:12:44.600
<v Speaker 1>kitchen and took it back to my room, and I

0:12:44.640 --> 0:12:46.360
<v Speaker 1>felt so guilty about it. The next day I never

0:12:46.400 --> 0:12:50.600
<v Speaker 1>stole anything again. We said, what did you take? Hey,

0:12:51.320 --> 0:12:54.360
<v Speaker 1>here it comes a gallon jar of olives.

0:12:56.640 --> 0:12:58.120
<v Speaker 2>Well, one of the great pleasures in life.

0:12:58.240 --> 0:13:00.920
<v Speaker 1>What the freak are you gonna do with a gallon

0:13:01.040 --> 0:13:04.680
<v Speaker 1>of olives? You're one thing you steal in your whole life.

0:13:04.840 --> 0:13:07.280
<v Speaker 3>You're gonna sit back and enjoy those What you're gonna

0:13:07.320 --> 0:13:08.439
<v Speaker 3>do of olives?

0:13:13.520 --> 0:13:15.720
<v Speaker 2>Long day in the kitchen? You canna pop a little olive?

0:13:15.800 --> 0:13:19.680
<v Speaker 1>Oh my god, I guess that's part of the hole.

0:13:19.720 --> 0:13:22.440
<v Speaker 1>You grow up without electricity or indoor plumbing thing, you know,

0:13:22.520 --> 0:13:25.400
<v Speaker 1>the joy of an olive may have been pretty exciting

0:13:25.480 --> 0:13:26.160
<v Speaker 1>for that part.

0:13:26.360 --> 0:13:26.600
<v Speaker 2>Yeah.

0:13:26.640 --> 0:13:28.600
<v Speaker 1>It's like when I read Tom Sawyer to the kids,

0:13:28.600 --> 0:13:30.120
<v Speaker 1>they are like, why are they getting so excited about

0:13:30.160 --> 0:13:32.439
<v Speaker 1>an apple? Well, they didn't have apple. I guess that's

0:13:32.480 --> 0:13:37.000
<v Speaker 1>one of was my dad a jar of olives stolen

0:13:37.200 --> 0:13:41.240
<v Speaker 1>Army olives. The guy that was with him stole a

0:13:41.280 --> 0:13:43.800
<v Speaker 1>half gallon of ice cream and stuck it under his shirt.

0:13:44.120 --> 0:13:45.840
<v Speaker 1>On on the way back to the barracks, they got

0:13:45.840 --> 0:13:47.680
<v Speaker 1>stopped and had to stand in the hot sun for

0:13:47.720 --> 0:13:51.000
<v Speaker 1>a while, and that ice cream started to melt and

0:13:51.040 --> 0:13:53.280
<v Speaker 1>he became one big wet stain of ice cream. I

0:13:53.320 --> 0:13:54.920
<v Speaker 1>don't know, I didn't ask for My dad must have

0:13:54.920 --> 0:13:56.960
<v Speaker 1>stashed the gallon jar of olives, because that's not easy

0:13:56.960 --> 0:13:57.520
<v Speaker 1>to e'd either.

0:13:59.440 --> 0:14:01.240
<v Speaker 2>Oh, oh, of all, I don't think.

0:14:02.400 --> 0:14:07.319
<v Speaker 1>No, surely you can't suit case of gallon jar of olives,

0:14:07.320 --> 0:14:08.800
<v Speaker 1>not with that attitude. You can't.

0:14:09.559 --> 0:14:18.480
<v Speaker 4>Okay, ship, you see what I put up with? Well,

0:14:18.760 --> 0:14:19.640
<v Speaker 4>I guess that's it.

0:14:23.440 --> 0:14:26.080
<v Speaker 2>Oh and and all Back