1
00:00:00,120 --> 00:00:03,320
Speaker 1: So we've all seen those videos, those paternity tests.

2
00:00:03,720 --> 00:00:06,880
Speaker 2: Who is the father? Who is the mother? Who cheated on? Who?

3
00:00:06,920 --> 00:00:11,280
Speaker 1: Who is Who's baby? But ladies and gentlemen, today we

4
00:00:11,400 --> 00:00:15,600
Speaker 1: are about to witness the marvel cinematic universe of Maury.

5
00:00:15,760 --> 00:00:19,440
Speaker 1: I am talking the most insane paternity tests we might

6
00:00:19,480 --> 00:00:23,119
Speaker 1: have ever read. We have read like three thousand stories

7
00:00:23,160 --> 00:00:29,680
Speaker 1: on this channel. I'm talking mine melantically insane DNA test results.

8
00:00:30,040 --> 00:00:35,200
Speaker 1: Without further ado, let's dive into the madness. Stranger says,

9
00:00:35,240 --> 00:00:37,920
Speaker 1: my deceased husband cheated and he is a secret son.

10
00:00:38,320 --> 00:00:41,560
Speaker 1: Now he's plotting something, but the DNA test revealed the truth.

11
00:00:42,400 --> 00:00:44,960
Speaker 1: This is like the ultimate version of sweeping something under

12
00:00:44,960 --> 00:00:47,240
Speaker 1: the rug, you know what I mean when you're like, Okay, look,

13
00:00:47,560 --> 00:00:51,480
Speaker 1: I could tell my family about my secret family. Or

14
00:00:51,560 --> 00:00:53,960
Speaker 1: I could just wait till I'm six feet under and

15
00:00:54,000 --> 00:00:55,160
Speaker 1: then I'll be popping up like.

16
00:00:55,280 --> 00:00:57,360
Speaker 2: Hey, I'm your kid. Hey, I'm your kid. Hey I'm

17
00:00:57,360 --> 00:00:59,880
Speaker 2: your kid. Like what are we doing?

18
00:01:00,440 --> 00:01:01,880
Speaker 1: Why do people have secret families?

19
00:01:01,960 --> 00:01:02,160
Speaker 2: Y'all?

20
00:01:02,160 --> 00:01:05,680
Speaker 1: I don't really I don't really know. I guess it's

21
00:01:05,720 --> 00:01:10,160
Speaker 1: a you know, sexual Well, let's read this story. My

22
00:01:10,200 --> 00:01:12,920
Speaker 1: life turned upside down last month when I was informed

23
00:01:12,959 --> 00:01:16,920
Speaker 1: of my husband's death in a work related accident. This would,

24
00:01:16,959 --> 00:01:20,759
Speaker 1: of course be hard enough to cope with. But shortly

25
00:01:20,880 --> 00:01:24,040
Speaker 1: before the funeral, there was a young man that came

26
00:01:24,240 --> 00:01:29,520
Speaker 1: at my house claiming to be my late husband's son.

27
00:01:30,280 --> 00:01:34,560
Speaker 1: Oh God, like already your dropped, Like the husband just

28
00:01:34,640 --> 00:01:37,800
Speaker 1: passed away and now we have like a secret son,

29
00:01:37,920 --> 00:01:40,440
Speaker 1: like read a room, bro, Have.

30
00:01:40,400 --> 00:01:43,319
Speaker 2: You heard of timing? Have you heard of timing? Before?

31
00:01:43,880 --> 00:01:47,880
Speaker 1: Good God, my husband didn't speak a word about him

32
00:01:47,920 --> 00:01:50,520
Speaker 1: to me. He claimed to have not known about me

33
00:01:50,960 --> 00:01:53,760
Speaker 1: or either of my daughters twelve and eight, until he

34
00:01:53,880 --> 00:01:57,240
Speaker 1: was notified of my husband's death and found the obituary

35
00:01:57,280 --> 00:01:59,960
Speaker 1: in the online version of our local paper. This young

36
00:02:00,200 --> 00:02:03,120
Speaker 1: man was eighteen and must have been born before I

37
00:02:03,240 --> 00:02:06,400
Speaker 1: met my husband. He also claim his own mother passed

38
00:02:06,440 --> 00:02:09,440
Speaker 1: away years ago and was never to his memory in

39
00:02:09,520 --> 00:02:12,760
Speaker 1: a relationship with my husband. So the boy's existence is

40
00:02:12,760 --> 00:02:17,120
Speaker 1: not proof of infidelity on my husband's part. However, I

41
00:02:17,240 --> 00:02:21,320
Speaker 1: still feel just as betrayed. My husband never breathed a

42
00:02:21,360 --> 00:02:25,080
Speaker 1: word of him to me. Yeah, because like, okay, if

43
00:02:25,120 --> 00:02:29,520
Speaker 1: it was born out of infidelity, right, obviously awful, Like

44
00:02:29,639 --> 00:02:32,240
Speaker 1: it's you know, you're a hot you had a child

45
00:02:32,360 --> 00:02:35,040
Speaker 1: outside of your relationship, outside of a woman you're married to.

46
00:02:35,520 --> 00:02:37,680
Speaker 1: You know now a later I guess had children with

47
00:02:38,360 --> 00:02:41,520
Speaker 1: when it comes to it beforehand, I mean you're an

48
00:02:41,560 --> 00:02:47,880
Speaker 1: absenty father basically, and so to not be involved in

49
00:02:47,960 --> 00:02:49,919
Speaker 1: his life to the point where you don't tell your partner,

50
00:02:49,960 --> 00:02:54,040
Speaker 1: which I guess technically you could be involved if you

51
00:02:55,280 --> 00:02:58,079
Speaker 1: don't tell your partner. But that's just that is the

52
00:02:58,840 --> 00:03:04,480
Speaker 1: biggest brightest bread flag of all time, my God command.

53
00:03:05,800 --> 00:03:08,880
Speaker 1: The boy lives in the UK, where my husband sometimes worked.

54
00:03:09,040 --> 00:03:11,320
Speaker 1: I live in the US. He traveled a lot in

55
00:03:11,320 --> 00:03:13,400
Speaker 1: his line of work, and I can't help but wonder

56
00:03:13,520 --> 00:03:15,639
Speaker 1: how many other secret children.

57
00:03:15,320 --> 00:03:15,760
Speaker 2: Did he have?

58
00:03:16,320 --> 00:03:20,280
Speaker 1: I made How many times did my husband visit this

59
00:03:20,360 --> 00:03:23,120
Speaker 1: boy and never tell me about it? What else was

60
00:03:23,160 --> 00:03:26,919
Speaker 1: he not telling me? Honestly, all fair questions. The boy

61
00:03:26,960 --> 00:03:30,120
Speaker 1: had pictures with himself and my husband at various ages.

62
00:03:30,480 --> 00:03:33,040
Speaker 1: He says he was brought up at boarding school, and

63
00:03:33,080 --> 00:03:36,880
Speaker 1: my husband visited him sometimes. Though I very much want to,

64
00:03:37,320 --> 00:03:41,000
Speaker 1: I have no reason to doubt his story. The boy

65
00:03:41,200 --> 00:03:43,160
Speaker 1: asked to come to the well, hold on, hold on,

66
00:03:43,200 --> 00:03:45,720
Speaker 1: hold on. So he just shows up at the doorstep

67
00:03:45,720 --> 00:03:49,000
Speaker 1: and he's like, I'm this man's son. I mean, I guess, okay,

68
00:03:49,000 --> 00:03:53,160
Speaker 1: he does have some pictures he does have I guess

69
00:03:53,240 --> 00:03:56,600
Speaker 1: the story timeline matching up, like he lived in London

70
00:03:56,840 --> 00:04:01,000
Speaker 1: and he would travel there and whatnot. But I'm also

71
00:04:01,120 --> 00:04:04,960
Speaker 1: still like low key, like, uh, are you sure you're not?

72
00:04:05,240 --> 00:04:07,480
Speaker 2: Like it's not like a cousin or something. I don't know.

73
00:04:08,040 --> 00:04:12,240
Speaker 1: Look, on this show, we figured out one thing. Where

74
00:04:12,280 --> 00:04:15,680
Speaker 1: are the test results? Where is the DNA test? Where

75
00:04:15,720 --> 00:04:19,400
Speaker 1: is the paternity test? Like I after after doing this

76
00:04:19,440 --> 00:04:23,280
Speaker 1: show and after reading stories like this, y'all, I if

77
00:04:23,320 --> 00:04:27,000
Speaker 1: this happens, I would get the paternity test, Like.

78
00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:29,640
Speaker 2: What what are we doing? God?

79
00:04:29,720 --> 00:04:33,600
Speaker 1: Now the boy asked to come to the funeral. I

80
00:04:33,720 --> 00:04:36,159
Speaker 1: want to say no, but I feel like I have

81
00:04:36,320 --> 00:04:43,000
Speaker 1: no right. That is hard, like, oh my god, Like

82
00:04:43,480 --> 00:04:48,360
Speaker 1: if if this this boy is truly his son, right,

83
00:04:48,839 --> 00:04:52,880
Speaker 1: that's going to your father's funeral, right? And but this

84
00:04:53,040 --> 00:04:55,560
Speaker 1: is the wife and the wife is like, you know,

85
00:04:55,800 --> 00:04:58,800
Speaker 1: still there's there's some seeds of doubt there, even though

86
00:04:58,839 --> 00:05:02,839
Speaker 1: it seems like she he believes that he is his

87
00:05:02,880 --> 00:05:05,560
Speaker 1: true son. I don't know, we just don't know for fact. Yeah,

88
00:05:05,600 --> 00:05:08,200
Speaker 1: I'm I'm still skeptical, but well we'll see, we'll see.

89
00:05:08,680 --> 00:05:11,600
Speaker 1: My kid sees me talking to the stranger and poke

90
00:05:11,680 --> 00:05:13,159
Speaker 1: their head in to ask what's going on?

91
00:05:13,800 --> 00:05:17,359
Speaker 2: Oh God. Before I can stop him.

92
00:05:17,360 --> 00:05:21,760
Speaker 1: The boy introduces himself to them as their half brother.

93
00:05:22,400 --> 00:05:27,240
Speaker 1: Oh my god, Oh my god. Okay, my guy was

94
00:05:27,279 --> 00:05:30,400
Speaker 1: already not reading the room. Now he's doing this. He's

95
00:05:30,440 --> 00:05:32,120
Speaker 1: blowing up the mom's spot.

96
00:05:32,160 --> 00:05:32,800
Speaker 2: Like what if? I mean?

97
00:05:32,800 --> 00:05:34,240
Speaker 1: I guess the kids are like really young at twelve

98
00:05:34,279 --> 00:05:35,000
Speaker 1: and eight, but like.

99
00:05:35,400 --> 00:05:38,880
Speaker 2: God, damn, dude, chill, I.

100
00:05:38,800 --> 00:05:41,640
Speaker 1: Guess he's eighteen. Maybe it's like, you know, you're young,

101
00:05:41,680 --> 00:05:44,359
Speaker 1: you don't know any better. But my god, Now not

102
00:05:44,480 --> 00:05:46,000
Speaker 1: only do I have to figure out how to cope

103
00:05:46,040 --> 00:05:48,359
Speaker 1: with all this information by self, but I have to

104
00:05:48,400 --> 00:05:50,640
Speaker 1: find some way to explain it to my children.

105
00:05:50,800 --> 00:05:52,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, my eight year old.

106
00:05:52,440 --> 00:05:55,239
Speaker 1: Doesn't seem to get the full implications of her father

107
00:05:55,360 --> 00:05:57,479
Speaker 1: keeping this kind of secret from all of us. But

108
00:05:57,560 --> 00:06:00,440
Speaker 1: my twelve year old is clearly upset. Although you won't

109
00:06:00,480 --> 00:06:04,839
Speaker 1: talk about it with me, Oh God, I'm op OPI's daughter.

110
00:06:06,080 --> 00:06:08,400
Speaker 1: At the funeral, the boy kind of lurked in the corner,

111
00:06:08,440 --> 00:06:10,880
Speaker 1: but when lunch was served afterwards, he approached both of

112
00:06:10,880 --> 00:06:13,359
Speaker 1: my girls and was playing games like tag with my

113
00:06:13,440 --> 00:06:15,680
Speaker 1: eight year old and some of her friends who joined in.

114
00:06:16,360 --> 00:06:18,640
Speaker 1: I didn't think this was appropriate, and when I told

115
00:06:18,720 --> 00:06:21,880
Speaker 1: him so, he apologized and said he did it to

116
00:06:22,040 --> 00:06:24,920
Speaker 1: raise her spirits and it's what people did for him

117
00:06:24,960 --> 00:06:29,080
Speaker 1: when his mother passed to cheer them up. Oh, oh

118
00:06:29,160 --> 00:06:33,760
Speaker 1: my god, guys, I'm on my last I'm on my

119
00:06:33,880 --> 00:06:37,200
Speaker 1: last line. Guys, I'm just sitting here in the in

120
00:06:37,240 --> 00:06:41,120
Speaker 1: the Maury mcu hospital.

121
00:06:41,720 --> 00:06:43,279
Speaker 2: My heart is on its last line.

122
00:06:43,360 --> 00:06:46,080
Speaker 1: The monitors about to go pull the plug on me,

123
00:06:46,120 --> 00:06:47,719
Speaker 1: because I don't know how much more I could take.

124
00:06:48,360 --> 00:06:50,680
Speaker 1: Something about his answer irked me, and I got the

125
00:06:50,720 --> 00:06:53,599
Speaker 1: impression he was trying to manipulate me into feeling sorry

126
00:06:53,640 --> 00:06:55,279
Speaker 1: for him, and using my children.

127
00:06:55,000 --> 00:06:58,080
Speaker 2: To do it. That's a good theory. That's a good theory.

128
00:06:58,240 --> 00:07:00,080
Speaker 1: My mom and my sister came up to help me

129
00:07:00,200 --> 00:07:02,839
Speaker 1: after I got the news about my husband. Of course,

130
00:07:02,920 --> 00:07:05,120
Speaker 1: I talked to them about what was going on, and

131
00:07:05,240 --> 00:07:09,120
Speaker 1: they were shocked. My mom brought up the point that

132
00:07:09,200 --> 00:07:12,720
Speaker 1: this boy might be after money. Yes, all of our

133
00:07:12,760 --> 00:07:15,400
Speaker 1: important assets were in both of our names, and I

134
00:07:15,440 --> 00:07:18,920
Speaker 1: am the only beneficiary of his life insurance policy. But

135
00:07:19,040 --> 00:07:21,280
Speaker 1: I was not sure what could happen if he tried

136
00:07:21,280 --> 00:07:24,680
Speaker 1: to sue. I asked the boy frankly if money is

137
00:07:24,720 --> 00:07:28,120
Speaker 1: what he was after, and he said, no, I couldn't

138
00:07:28,160 --> 00:07:29,240
Speaker 1: take any of your money.

139
00:07:29,520 --> 00:07:31,040
Speaker 2: You have kids to take care of.

140
00:07:31,440 --> 00:07:33,400
Speaker 1: It irked me the way he said it, as though

141
00:07:33,440 --> 00:07:35,560
Speaker 1: I was offering money and he was trying to show

142
00:07:35,560 --> 00:07:38,200
Speaker 1: how good he was by turning it down. It felt

143
00:07:38,200 --> 00:07:40,960
Speaker 1: as though he expected me to give it to him.

144
00:07:41,360 --> 00:07:41,920
Speaker 2: Anyways.

145
00:07:42,200 --> 00:07:46,160
Speaker 1: Yeah, you know when your friend is over, you're over

146
00:07:46,200 --> 00:07:48,720
Speaker 1: at your friend's house and they're like cleaning or doing

147
00:07:48,760 --> 00:07:50,680
Speaker 1: the dishes, and you're like, hey, you know.

148
00:07:50,960 --> 00:07:53,560
Speaker 2: If you need any help, like, I'm totally here to do.

149
00:07:53,440 --> 00:07:56,520
Speaker 1: That, and then in your mind you're like, fuck these dishes.

150
00:07:56,560 --> 00:07:59,320
Speaker 1: I'm not trying to do that. Just kidding all my friends,

151
00:07:59,400 --> 00:08:01,640
Speaker 1: you know, you know, I'm obvious here to help their dishes.

152
00:08:01,680 --> 00:08:05,040
Speaker 1: But yeah, this is like that, But time's fucking a million.

153
00:08:05,360 --> 00:08:07,560
Speaker 1: I asked the boy what he wanted, and he said

154
00:08:07,600 --> 00:08:10,080
Speaker 1: he wanted to get to know my children because they're

155
00:08:10,120 --> 00:08:12,400
Speaker 1: his sisters. They might be his sisters, but he is

156
00:08:12,440 --> 00:08:16,560
Speaker 1: a stranger to them, regardless of biological relation. Apparently, at

157
00:08:16,560 --> 00:08:18,720
Speaker 1: the funeral, he told my eight year old he was

158
00:08:18,760 --> 00:08:20,800
Speaker 1: going to ask me if he could take my girls

159
00:08:20,840 --> 00:08:23,600
Speaker 1: to the aquarium and so that he got her hopes

160
00:08:23,680 --> 00:08:26,920
Speaker 1: up about it before I could even make a decision. Again,

161
00:08:27,040 --> 00:08:30,960
Speaker 1: that is just not to come on, bro, like, yeah,

162
00:08:30,400 --> 00:08:31,640
Speaker 1: you're doing.

163
00:08:31,400 --> 00:08:32,440
Speaker 2: Too much with stuff like that.

164
00:08:33,000 --> 00:08:35,719
Speaker 1: I said yes, only if my mom and sister went

165
00:08:35,760 --> 00:08:38,040
Speaker 1: with them, because I wasn't about to let my girls

166
00:08:38,080 --> 00:08:41,040
Speaker 1: go with a strange man no matter what. And we

167
00:08:41,080 --> 00:08:45,800
Speaker 1: still don't know if he's the full blood relative yeah,

168
00:08:45,880 --> 00:08:48,800
Speaker 1: or a half brother whatever. Over the next week, he

169
00:08:48,840 --> 00:08:51,120
Speaker 1: took my girls to the park ice cream place in

170
00:08:51,160 --> 00:08:53,120
Speaker 1: the lake with my sister as a chaperone.

171
00:08:53,200 --> 00:08:53,800
Speaker 2: Every time.

172
00:08:54,080 --> 00:08:56,160
Speaker 1: I agreed to this, and it was helpful because it

173
00:08:56,160 --> 00:08:58,280
Speaker 1: gave me the chance to break down and cry to

174
00:08:58,360 --> 00:09:02,280
Speaker 1: my mom without the girls around. Oh oh, my heart

175
00:09:02,320 --> 00:09:04,559
Speaker 1: goes out to you. When he left and my eight

176
00:09:04,600 --> 00:09:07,160
Speaker 1: year old hugged him and told him not to go,

177
00:09:07,320 --> 00:09:10,160
Speaker 1: and he said, I promise I'll come to visit again.

178
00:09:10,760 --> 00:09:13,240
Speaker 1: I stepped in and said, no, I think it would

179
00:09:13,280 --> 00:09:16,000
Speaker 1: be best if you didn't come back here. He looked

180
00:09:16,080 --> 00:09:18,080
Speaker 1: hurt in My eight year old cried, but I was

181
00:09:18,120 --> 00:09:21,520
Speaker 1: sick of seeing him promise things without getting approval. She

182
00:09:21,640 --> 00:09:24,040
Speaker 1: thinks it's a cool mystery like from a TV show

183
00:09:24,080 --> 00:09:26,600
Speaker 1: that she has a secret brother and she doesn't realize

184
00:09:26,640 --> 00:09:30,880
Speaker 1: how disturbing it is that her father hid his existence. Yeah, like,

185
00:09:31,280 --> 00:09:33,640
Speaker 1: I don't know, put down in the comments below, would

186
00:09:33,640 --> 00:09:37,120
Speaker 1: you in that moment, have I like said it in

187
00:09:37,160 --> 00:09:40,760
Speaker 1: front of the two of them? I mean, he's kind

188
00:09:40,760 --> 00:09:43,320
Speaker 1: of like gotten her goat a lot and just done

189
00:09:43,320 --> 00:09:45,800
Speaker 1: a lot of stuff like kind of Yeah, it does

190
00:09:45,880 --> 00:09:48,320
Speaker 1: kind of seem like he's manipulating the situation or just

191
00:09:48,360 --> 00:09:50,840
Speaker 1: like doing it in a way where she can't say no,

192
00:09:51,320 --> 00:09:54,520
Speaker 1: and that's got to be very frustrating. But also like

193
00:09:54,640 --> 00:09:56,760
Speaker 1: the eight year old, you know, she's she's kind of

194
00:09:56,760 --> 00:09:59,560
Speaker 1: like the bystander in this. So it's kind of unfortunate

195
00:09:59,600 --> 00:10:02,320
Speaker 1: that that she got upset in that way, you know,

196
00:10:02,320 --> 00:10:04,520
Speaker 1: in that moment. But put in the comments below, would

197
00:10:04,559 --> 00:10:07,160
Speaker 1: you have said it right there in front of both

198
00:10:07,160 --> 00:10:09,440
Speaker 1: of them? My sister asked me later why I told

199
00:10:09,520 --> 00:10:11,440
Speaker 1: him not to come back, and I told her I

200
00:10:11,440 --> 00:10:13,600
Speaker 1: think the whole thing is weird. I don't know this

201
00:10:13,679 --> 00:10:16,280
Speaker 1: boy or his real intentions. He could be some kind

202
00:10:16,320 --> 00:10:19,000
Speaker 1: of weirdo trying to get my girls alone. That is

203
00:10:19,080 --> 00:10:22,120
Speaker 1: very true, my sister says, I judged without ever getting

204
00:10:22,120 --> 00:10:24,000
Speaker 1: to know him, and he seems like a very sweet

205
00:10:24,000 --> 00:10:26,480
Speaker 1: young man. He grew up mostly without a family, and

206
00:10:26,520 --> 00:10:28,280
Speaker 1: he could have been jealous that my girls got all

207
00:10:28,320 --> 00:10:31,760
Speaker 1: of his father's attention, but instead he wanted to connect

208
00:10:31,800 --> 00:10:32,160
Speaker 1: with them.

209
00:10:32,559 --> 00:10:34,120
Speaker 2: That is also very true.

210
00:10:34,240 --> 00:10:37,920
Speaker 1: Like I mean, this kid, you know, basically grew up

211
00:10:39,040 --> 00:10:42,600
Speaker 1: very very, very limited time with his father, it seems.

212
00:10:43,480 --> 00:10:46,480
Speaker 1: And the fact that in the juxtaposition to that, these

213
00:10:46,520 --> 00:10:50,560
Speaker 1: girls had him as a full father living with them,

214
00:10:51,160 --> 00:10:53,560
Speaker 1: taking care of them. You know, we haven't heard anything

215
00:10:53,640 --> 00:10:57,600
Speaker 1: on what type of father he was, but seems like

216
00:10:57,679 --> 00:11:01,079
Speaker 1: so far there's no complaints from OPI side, So I

217
00:11:01,120 --> 00:11:01,480
Speaker 1: don't know.

218
00:11:01,559 --> 00:11:02,240
Speaker 2: This is crazy.

219
00:11:02,640 --> 00:11:06,040
Speaker 1: My opinion is that even if those are his intentions

220
00:11:06,120 --> 00:11:08,880
Speaker 1: and he's totally innocent, I still don't want him around

221
00:11:08,880 --> 00:11:11,600
Speaker 1: my home or my girls. To me, he is just

222
00:11:11,640 --> 00:11:13,880
Speaker 1: proof that my husband lied to me for years and

223
00:11:13,920 --> 00:11:14,520
Speaker 1: it makes me.

224
00:11:14,520 --> 00:11:15,439
Speaker 2: Sick to look at him.

225
00:11:16,080 --> 00:11:19,840
Speaker 1: Yeah, my girls don't need this drama either, and even

226
00:11:19,880 --> 00:11:21,880
Speaker 1: my eight year old is going to be traumatized once

227
00:11:21,960 --> 00:11:24,360
Speaker 1: she is old enough to realize how much her dad

228
00:11:24,440 --> 00:11:28,199
Speaker 1: was hiding me or my girls don't owe him anything.

229
00:11:29,080 --> 00:11:31,360
Speaker 1: My sister says that I don't want him in my life,

230
00:11:31,400 --> 00:11:33,520
Speaker 1: but I don't have the right to deny the girls

231
00:11:33,559 --> 00:11:34,160
Speaker 1: their brother.

232
00:11:34,640 --> 00:11:35,360
Speaker 2: She pointed out.

233
00:11:35,400 --> 00:11:38,880
Speaker 1: Social workers do everything they can to avoid separating siblings

234
00:11:38,920 --> 00:11:41,280
Speaker 1: because of the trauma. I said, it's not the same

235
00:11:41,320 --> 00:11:44,040
Speaker 1: thing because my girls have only known this brother for

236
00:11:44,120 --> 00:11:44,600
Speaker 1: a week.

237
00:11:45,160 --> 00:11:46,520
Speaker 2: My sister said, it's also.

238
00:11:46,360 --> 00:11:50,040
Speaker 1: Important because my girl's brother is now the only person

239
00:11:50,280 --> 00:11:53,920
Speaker 1: they know of of their culture quote unquote. My husband

240
00:11:54,280 --> 00:11:57,679
Speaker 1: was like one eighth Hawaiian, the rest white and Asian,

241
00:11:58,040 --> 00:12:01,480
Speaker 1: so the girls and their brother are are one sixteenth.

242
00:12:01,880 --> 00:12:04,480
Speaker 1: The boy appears to be white, and my daughters and

243
00:12:04,600 --> 00:12:07,360
Speaker 1: I are black. But this boy was raised in the

244
00:12:07,480 --> 00:12:10,920
Speaker 1: UK and he isn't part of Hawaiian culture. And honestly,

245
00:12:11,080 --> 00:12:14,080
Speaker 1: I think culture is something natural and not something to

246
00:12:14,240 --> 00:12:18,000
Speaker 1: force because of genetics. My girls don't live in Hawaii.

247
00:12:18,200 --> 00:12:21,440
Speaker 1: They live in Oregon, so that is their culture, not

248
00:12:21,600 --> 00:12:24,840
Speaker 1: quote unquote Black culture or quote unquote Hawaiian culture. I

249
00:12:24,840 --> 00:12:27,840
Speaker 1: don't force myself or my girls to participate in African

250
00:12:27,920 --> 00:12:33,280
Speaker 1: culture just because of our genetics. I thought my eight

251
00:12:33,400 --> 00:12:36,600
Speaker 1: year old would get over her brother, and she did

252
00:12:36,640 --> 00:12:40,040
Speaker 1: go several weeks without asking about him, but yesterday she

253
00:12:40,200 --> 00:12:43,520
Speaker 1: asked about him again. I feel bad about ever allowing

254
00:12:43,559 --> 00:12:47,679
Speaker 1: them to go anywhere together and bond. Yeah, that's a

255
00:12:48,120 --> 00:12:50,720
Speaker 1: that's tricky. You're in this rock and a hard place

256
00:12:50,760 --> 00:12:52,880
Speaker 1: now where it's like you don't want to kind of

257
00:12:52,880 --> 00:12:56,920
Speaker 1: continue this relationship because.

258
00:12:56,960 --> 00:12:57,960
Speaker 2: I don't know.

259
00:12:58,040 --> 00:13:01,360
Speaker 1: I mean, it's yeah, y'all, I need your take this.

260
00:13:01,679 --> 00:13:03,400
Speaker 1: This is really what I need here. I am like

261
00:13:04,080 --> 00:13:08,160
Speaker 1: so lost in the sauce on this one. I know

262
00:13:08,280 --> 00:13:11,679
Speaker 1: the girls being able to access and build a relationship

263
00:13:11,720 --> 00:13:15,520
Speaker 1: with with their brother, but you know, like Opie said,

264
00:13:16,000 --> 00:13:18,439
Speaker 1: this isn't a case where there were siblings that grew

265
00:13:18,520 --> 00:13:20,880
Speaker 1: up together that were separated in like a foster home

266
00:13:20,960 --> 00:13:21,800
Speaker 1: or something like that.

267
00:13:22,040 --> 00:13:23,920
Speaker 2: They literally just met. I am.

268
00:13:24,040 --> 00:13:26,920
Speaker 1: I am completely torn, guys, I am, I am lost.

269
00:13:27,400 --> 00:13:29,800
Speaker 1: I wish I'd handled the whole thing differently, And now

270
00:13:29,840 --> 00:13:32,400
Speaker 1: I don't know how to explain the situation to my kids.

271
00:13:32,640 --> 00:13:35,040
Speaker 1: My twelve year old hasn't asked about her brother, but

272
00:13:35,240 --> 00:13:38,439
Speaker 1: she has been extremely closed off since her father's passing,

273
00:13:38,520 --> 00:13:41,560
Speaker 1: and I don't know how this issue might be complicating

274
00:13:41,600 --> 00:13:44,520
Speaker 1: what she's feeling. I just need some outside opinions to

275
00:13:44,720 --> 00:13:48,439
Speaker 1: know what to do about this. It seems people were

276
00:13:48,440 --> 00:13:51,800
Speaker 1: also torn about this, so most comments were calling original

277
00:13:51,840 --> 00:13:54,360
Speaker 1: OPI the ahole or saying that she needed to allow

278
00:13:54,400 --> 00:13:57,280
Speaker 1: her daughters to know their brother. Some people asked the

279
00:13:57,320 --> 00:13:59,959
Speaker 1: original OPI why she didn't ask for a DNA test,

280
00:14:00,240 --> 00:14:03,240
Speaker 1: to which she replied, I thought about maybe asking the

281
00:14:03,280 --> 00:14:05,800
Speaker 1: boy about a DNA test, but I don't know what

282
00:14:05,880 --> 00:14:08,080
Speaker 1: it would achieve. I don't want him in my life

283
00:14:08,240 --> 00:14:10,319
Speaker 1: or my daughter's life either way. And even if the

284
00:14:10,400 --> 00:14:13,520
Speaker 1: DNA test came back negative, it would only raise more

285
00:14:13,640 --> 00:14:16,000
Speaker 1: questions and I don't know if it would open up

286
00:14:16,000 --> 00:14:18,920
Speaker 1: any legal troubles where now I owe the boy money

287
00:14:18,960 --> 00:14:21,720
Speaker 1: from my husband's estate if it comes back positive.

288
00:14:22,480 --> 00:14:23,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, I have no idea.

289
00:14:23,440 --> 00:14:25,520
Speaker 1: I don't know if he have any lawyers watching right now,

290
00:14:25,960 --> 00:14:29,800
Speaker 1: But yeah, what is the situation with if a child

291
00:14:29,920 --> 00:14:33,360
Speaker 1: has proven to be related that kind of comes out

292
00:14:33,400 --> 00:14:34,280
Speaker 1: of the woodwork like this.

293
00:14:34,760 --> 00:14:36,080
Speaker 2: Are they entitled to anything?

294
00:14:36,080 --> 00:14:38,240
Speaker 1: I guess specifically in the States, but he was in

295
00:14:38,280 --> 00:14:42,320
Speaker 1: the UK and the wife was the main bit officiary

296
00:14:42,440 --> 00:14:44,000
Speaker 1: of his life insurance, like I could.

297
00:14:44,240 --> 00:14:44,600
Speaker 2: I don't know.

298
00:14:44,640 --> 00:14:47,960
Speaker 1: It seems like a pretty complicated, dicey situation. If there's

299
00:14:47,960 --> 00:14:51,560
Speaker 1: any lawyers out there in the okop fan, feel free

300
00:14:51,600 --> 00:14:55,320
Speaker 1: to drop down in the comments your take below.

301
00:14:55,040 --> 00:14:57,760
Speaker 2: Because I do not know what would happen here, and.

302
00:14:57,800 --> 00:15:00,560
Speaker 1: In response to the comments about it being a she

303
00:15:00,720 --> 00:15:04,240
Speaker 1: initially made these edits to her post. Well, the comments

304
00:15:04,280 --> 00:15:06,080
Speaker 1: are alerting me now to how this might be a

305
00:15:06,120 --> 00:15:09,800
Speaker 1: scam attempt, and that has opened my eyes. I didn't

306
00:15:09,800 --> 00:15:11,880
Speaker 1: want to introduce the stranger to my kids, but when

307
00:15:11,880 --> 00:15:15,040
Speaker 1: he showed up to deliver such shocking news to my children,

308
00:15:15,480 --> 00:15:18,400
Speaker 1: came in and asked what was going on, he introduced

309
00:15:18,480 --> 00:15:24,320
Speaker 1: himself before I could think about how to tell my children. Yeah. Yeah,

310
00:15:24,320 --> 00:15:27,080
Speaker 1: that's what I'm saying. Like generally, in any of these scenarios,

311
00:15:27,120 --> 00:15:30,400
Speaker 1: I feel like if someone is claiming to be a

312
00:15:30,680 --> 00:15:33,680
Speaker 1: relative or something, especially at a time of passing something

313
00:15:33,760 --> 00:15:38,800
Speaker 1: like this, then definitely go for the DNA test. Obviously,

314
00:15:38,880 --> 00:15:41,120
Speaker 1: like op you mentioned, there's some other complications maybe now,

315
00:15:41,160 --> 00:15:44,800
Speaker 1: but my I'm guessing my initial reaction would have been like, Okay,

316
00:15:44,880 --> 00:15:46,880
Speaker 1: let's get a DNA test and see if this is

317
00:15:47,200 --> 00:15:49,840
Speaker 1: see if this is real. He asked if he could

318
00:15:49,840 --> 00:15:51,360
Speaker 1: show up to the funeral, and I felt like I

319
00:15:51,360 --> 00:15:54,040
Speaker 1: couldn't say no to that, but then used it as

320
00:15:54,080 --> 00:15:57,640
Speaker 1: an inn with my children. He offered to them behind

321
00:15:57,680 --> 00:15:59,680
Speaker 1: my back to take them somewhere, so then I would

322
00:15:59,720 --> 00:16:01,200
Speaker 1: feel like the bad guy if I said no.

323
00:16:01,440 --> 00:16:03,640
Speaker 2: It rubbed me the wrong way, but I brushed it off.

324
00:16:03,800 --> 00:16:06,160
Speaker 1: I was in a vulnerable state, not thinking clearly, and

325
00:16:06,240 --> 00:16:07,320
Speaker 1: he took advantage of that.

326
00:16:07,520 --> 00:16:09,640
Speaker 2: I should have trusted my instincts from the beginning.

327
00:16:09,920 --> 00:16:11,960
Speaker 1: The idea that there could be scammers that prey on

328
00:16:12,000 --> 00:16:14,240
Speaker 1: grieving families is just so horrible.

329
00:16:14,280 --> 00:16:16,280
Speaker 2: I had no idea of such a thing. That is

330
00:16:16,320 --> 00:16:17,760
Speaker 2: a pretty yeah, I.

331
00:16:17,720 --> 00:16:20,480
Speaker 1: Mean pretty fucking scum of the earth to do that

332
00:16:20,560 --> 00:16:23,000
Speaker 1: kind of stuff. I've contacted a lawyer to figure out

333
00:16:23,040 --> 00:16:25,320
Speaker 1: how to establish if there is truth to his story

334
00:16:25,360 --> 00:16:28,040
Speaker 1: and what my legal obligations are to the boy. I'm

335
00:16:28,120 --> 00:16:30,280
Speaker 1: also going to have a long talk with my sister

336
00:16:30,440 --> 00:16:32,320
Speaker 1: to see if in their outings he had done any

337
00:16:32,440 --> 00:16:35,000
Speaker 1: kind of prying that might have led to him learning

338
00:16:35,000 --> 00:16:37,880
Speaker 1: information about my family that he could use somehow. I'm

339
00:16:37,960 --> 00:16:40,600
Speaker 1: already in the process of getting therapy for my children

340
00:16:40,640 --> 00:16:43,240
Speaker 1: and myself. That's actually something I was going to mention earlier.

341
00:16:43,280 --> 00:16:46,040
Speaker 1: I mean, there's already a lot of traumatization I think

342
00:16:46,080 --> 00:16:46,960
Speaker 1: for these poor children.

343
00:16:47,000 --> 00:16:48,120
Speaker 2: They're twelve and eight years old.

344
00:16:48,160 --> 00:16:50,880
Speaker 1: They just lost their father, and now there's this kind

345
00:16:50,920 --> 00:16:54,040
Speaker 1: of other curveball thrown into the situation. The twelve year

346
00:16:54,080 --> 00:16:56,800
Speaker 1: old is old enough to be aware, and it seems

347
00:16:56,840 --> 00:16:59,200
Speaker 1: like it's really upsetting to her. The eight year old

348
00:16:59,240 --> 00:17:01,960
Speaker 1: doesn't really seem to be processing what's going on. So

349
00:17:02,160 --> 00:17:05,720
Speaker 1: I'm just very glad to hear that OPI is putting

350
00:17:05,720 --> 00:17:08,320
Speaker 1: her children in though therapy, because I definitely think that

351
00:17:08,440 --> 00:17:09,919
Speaker 1: they deserve that.

352
00:17:10,920 --> 00:17:11,520
Speaker 2: Edit number two.

353
00:17:11,600 --> 00:17:13,760
Speaker 1: People have been saying a lot of nasty things about me,

354
00:17:13,800 --> 00:17:15,800
Speaker 1: and I don't think I'm going to get much more

355
00:17:16,000 --> 00:17:18,000
Speaker 1: productive input on this, so this is gonna be my

356
00:17:18,080 --> 00:17:21,240
Speaker 1: last opinion on the topic. I've considered taking the post down,

357
00:17:21,359 --> 00:17:23,119
Speaker 1: but I decided to leave it up so people can

358
00:17:23,160 --> 00:17:26,159
Speaker 1: be aware that scammers operate like this. They can be

359
00:17:26,240 --> 00:17:28,920
Speaker 1: so good at what they do, even hundreds of third

360
00:17:28,920 --> 00:17:32,040
Speaker 1: party outsiders will take the scammer's side. In hindsight, I

361
00:17:32,119 --> 00:17:34,359
Speaker 1: can't believe I didn't see it, and I cannot believe

362
00:17:34,400 --> 00:17:36,199
Speaker 1: I ever let such a person step foot in my

363
00:17:36,240 --> 00:17:39,240
Speaker 1: home or even speak to my children. Apparently the goal

364
00:17:39,320 --> 00:17:41,359
Speaker 1: was not to ask for money right away. It was

365
00:17:41,359 --> 00:17:43,720
Speaker 1: to get close to me and my children and ask

366
00:17:43,800 --> 00:17:46,800
Speaker 1: me for money later for a fake emergency. Other commentors

367
00:17:46,840 --> 00:17:49,560
Speaker 1: have elaborated on how this works. If my daughter asks

368
00:17:49,560 --> 00:17:52,720
Speaker 1: about her brother again, I'll tell her that she was tricked.

369
00:17:53,080 --> 00:17:54,840
Speaker 1: I don't want to do that to her unless I'm

370
00:17:54,880 --> 00:17:58,840
Speaker 1: completely sure. So I'm likely going to be asking the

371
00:17:58,880 --> 00:18:03,920
Speaker 1: boy for a DNA test, birth certificate, et cetera. However,

372
00:18:04,200 --> 00:18:07,760
Speaker 1: not until I have the chance to speak to my lawyer.

373
00:18:08,359 --> 00:18:14,320
Speaker 1: All Right, y'all, Uh, there's a big update. There's a big, juicy,

374
00:18:15,400 --> 00:18:19,800
Speaker 1: seeping bursting at the rims update.

375
00:18:20,400 --> 00:18:22,240
Speaker 2: But we got, we got. We gotta take a pause,

376
00:18:22,280 --> 00:18:24,160
Speaker 2: we gotta take a breather, y'all.

377
00:18:24,160 --> 00:18:28,200
Speaker 1: We have just been through a roller coaster of emotions,

378
00:18:28,240 --> 00:18:30,840
Speaker 1: nothing compared to what Op is going through. My god,

379
00:18:32,200 --> 00:18:34,840
Speaker 1: what do we think of this situation? I mean, I

380
00:18:34,880 --> 00:18:38,840
Speaker 1: can see why Op is so torn, and uh, you know,

381
00:18:38,960 --> 00:18:41,040
Speaker 1: it's definitely easy to sit here and be like, Okay,

382
00:18:41,040 --> 00:18:44,159
Speaker 1: we can critique, you know, the different choices of like

383
00:18:44,280 --> 00:18:47,800
Speaker 1: should she have you know, put up a hard wall immediately,

384
00:18:47,840 --> 00:18:50,439
Speaker 1: should she have asked for the DNA test initially, you know,

385
00:18:50,480 --> 00:18:53,960
Speaker 1: before any of this stuff went down. Should she have uh,

386
00:18:54,000 --> 00:18:56,440
Speaker 1: you know, said stuff in front of her her children.

387
00:18:57,000 --> 00:18:59,000
Speaker 1: It's easy to kind of pick apart. But I think

388
00:18:59,080 --> 00:19:03,159
Speaker 1: one big thing to remember is she is in major grief,

389
00:19:03,240 --> 00:19:07,919
Speaker 1: probably from her husband's passing, of course, and then also

390
00:19:08,359 --> 00:19:10,399
Speaker 1: I guess you could almost kind of put it in

391
00:19:10,480 --> 00:19:13,840
Speaker 1: a similar category as grief finding out that her husband

392
00:19:13,960 --> 00:19:16,520
Speaker 1: hid this lie, which it seems really really bothers her,

393
00:19:16,600 --> 00:19:20,080
Speaker 1: bothers her, which is very understandable. So you know, she

394
00:19:20,160 --> 00:19:23,520
Speaker 1: did mention like, oh, she wasn't in this clear head state. Yeah,

395
00:19:23,600 --> 00:19:26,439
Speaker 1: I don't know where I would be at in this

396
00:19:26,520 --> 00:19:30,000
Speaker 1: type of situation because there's just so many emotions and

397
00:19:30,119 --> 00:19:33,240
Speaker 1: you're probably so charged while you're going through these things,

398
00:19:33,240 --> 00:19:35,240
Speaker 1: and you're like all you want is just to be

399
00:19:35,240 --> 00:19:36,639
Speaker 1: able to sit down and be like, let me just

400
00:19:36,760 --> 00:19:39,359
Speaker 1: process this, let me just I don't know, like have

401
00:19:40,280 --> 00:19:44,000
Speaker 1: some peace, you know. But instead, this whole thing kind

402
00:19:44,000 --> 00:19:46,520
Speaker 1: of you know, came in and just and just shook

403
00:19:46,600 --> 00:19:49,320
Speaker 1: up her world. And you know, like in fairness to

404
00:19:49,359 --> 00:19:52,399
Speaker 1: the boy too, like let's say we still don't have

405
00:19:52,440 --> 00:19:55,080
Speaker 1: the DNA test results. If this really was his father,

406
00:19:55,200 --> 00:19:57,040
Speaker 1: if his father visited him and he didn't get a

407
00:19:57,119 --> 00:20:00,680
Speaker 1: chance to see him, that's you know, and he's seeing

408
00:20:00,720 --> 00:20:03,600
Speaker 1: these two girls that grew up with the father. Oh,

409
00:20:04,000 --> 00:20:06,280
Speaker 1: that has got to be so damaging. I feel like

410
00:20:07,320 --> 00:20:11,280
Speaker 1: if any of you have any stories like this, like

411
00:20:11,359 --> 00:20:14,720
Speaker 1: secret family that came out of the woodwork, share your

412
00:20:14,960 --> 00:20:17,320
Speaker 1: I'm very curious for you to share your thoughts and

413
00:20:17,359 --> 00:20:20,520
Speaker 1: opinions below and maybe share your story as well.

414
00:20:20,520 --> 00:20:21,680
Speaker 2: You can share it in the comments.

415
00:20:21,720 --> 00:20:24,640
Speaker 1: Also, we have our slash okop show our subreddit where

416
00:20:24,640 --> 00:20:27,920
Speaker 1: we've been reading a lot of y'all stories. I don't know,

417
00:20:28,280 --> 00:20:32,159
Speaker 1: this is just an insane situation. It seems like every

418
00:20:32,320 --> 00:20:35,119
Speaker 1: all of the main people are going through a lot,

419
00:20:35,200 --> 00:20:39,000
Speaker 1: and I just feel sad for them. Guys, I feel sad.

420
00:20:39,760 --> 00:20:43,800
Speaker 1: I'm a sad boy. But I have you all here

421
00:20:44,000 --> 00:20:49,240
Speaker 1: and we have something else. The update, I was wrong

422
00:20:49,560 --> 00:20:54,000
Speaker 1: and I was the a hole my husband's son. I

423
00:20:54,040 --> 00:20:56,200
Speaker 1: wasn't trying to demean him by calling him the boy.

424
00:20:56,320 --> 00:20:58,120
Speaker 1: I was avoiding using names.

425
00:20:58,680 --> 00:21:02,840
Speaker 2: Was telling the ruth. Oh oh my god.

426
00:21:03,359 --> 00:21:06,119
Speaker 1: My husband's name wasn't on his birth certificate, but the

427
00:21:06,200 --> 00:21:10,960
Speaker 1: DNA test did show that he was related to my kids.

428
00:21:11,200 --> 00:21:15,879
Speaker 1: He also had more photos, cards, voicemails, and tons of

429
00:21:16,000 --> 00:21:19,400
Speaker 1: evidence to prove that my husband did keep in regular

430
00:21:19,560 --> 00:21:22,680
Speaker 1: contact with him. Okay, so maybe even a lot more

431
00:21:22,680 --> 00:21:26,320
Speaker 1: contact than we initially thought. Apparently the son's grandparents were

432
00:21:26,359 --> 00:21:30,080
Speaker 1: his legal guardians. My husband occasionally gave them cash under

433
00:21:30,119 --> 00:21:33,399
Speaker 1: the table child support. I did notice that my husband

434
00:21:33,440 --> 00:21:36,919
Speaker 1: would sometimes make large withdrawals when he went overseas. He

435
00:21:37,000 --> 00:21:40,560
Speaker 1: said it was because the shops there didn't take his car. Ah,

436
00:21:40,720 --> 00:21:44,679
Speaker 1: man it hearing this now, it makes it sting that

437
00:21:45,160 --> 00:21:49,119
Speaker 1: much harder that he did keep this lie from his wife.

438
00:21:49,160 --> 00:21:52,080
Speaker 1: And it's like, why, because if he had the kid,

439
00:21:52,160 --> 00:21:55,199
Speaker 1: even op said eighteen years that was outside of the

440
00:21:55,200 --> 00:21:56,320
Speaker 1: window of their relationship.

441
00:21:56,600 --> 00:21:59,040
Speaker 2: Why did he not tell her why?

442
00:21:59,320 --> 00:22:01,560
Speaker 1: I wanted to believe it was a scam because I

443
00:22:01,600 --> 00:22:05,359
Speaker 1: thought it made more sense than my husband having lied again. Ope,

444
00:22:05,359 --> 00:22:07,240
Speaker 1: he's going through a lot, not to not to even

445
00:22:07,359 --> 00:22:10,760
Speaker 1: justify any of the negative stuff that she she uh

446
00:22:10,920 --> 00:22:14,479
Speaker 1: did to the boy, but to the boy to her

447
00:22:14,560 --> 00:22:17,240
Speaker 1: husband's son. See now, see what you got me, I'm

448
00:22:17,240 --> 00:22:20,119
Speaker 1: saying now, Obie, my goodness. Talking to my husband's son

449
00:22:20,160 --> 00:22:23,359
Speaker 1: a bit more revealed that he'd been lying to him too.

450
00:22:23,440 --> 00:22:26,480
Speaker 1: Apparently he told him he was a cowboy and a

451
00:22:26,560 --> 00:22:30,199
Speaker 1: pro football player. Then when my son googled him, he

452
00:22:30,280 --> 00:22:32,560
Speaker 1: switched to saying that he was a gangster who had

453
00:22:32,600 --> 00:22:38,480
Speaker 1: done prison time. What the what Okay, this guy was

454
00:22:38,560 --> 00:22:42,040
Speaker 1: already like going to piece of shitsville, but my mayor

455
00:22:42,119 --> 00:22:48,240
Speaker 1: just became the fucking president prime minister of Scumville. Fucking

456
00:22:48,480 --> 00:22:52,920
Speaker 1: dick bag, like what, oh my god.

457
00:22:54,000 --> 00:22:57,240
Speaker 2: And we always say on this show where they're no

458
00:22:58,400 --> 00:23:02,520
Speaker 2: zero not a red flags come on.

459
00:23:03,320 --> 00:23:07,159
Speaker 1: Needless to say, none of that is remotely true. I

460
00:23:07,160 --> 00:23:10,240
Speaker 1: can't fathom what could possess him to behave this way,

461
00:23:10,520 --> 00:23:13,560
Speaker 1: lying to me, lying to his kid, not raising his kid.

462
00:23:13,800 --> 00:23:17,240
Speaker 1: I'm questioning everything my husband ever told me, and wondering

463
00:23:17,560 --> 00:23:20,479
Speaker 1: if it was me who passed away, would he have

464
00:23:20,560 --> 00:23:25,320
Speaker 1: abandoned our kids as well. I felt horrible for this boy.

465
00:23:26,000 --> 00:23:28,159
Speaker 1: I'm in therapy and working on ways to cope and

466
00:23:28,200 --> 00:23:31,240
Speaker 1: forgive my husband for my own peace of mind. She's

467
00:23:31,280 --> 00:23:33,720
Speaker 1: helped me work out why I reacted to my husband's

468
00:23:33,760 --> 00:23:36,240
Speaker 1: son the way I did. I thought he was manipulating

469
00:23:36,280 --> 00:23:38,720
Speaker 1: me and my kids, but what I actually sense was

470
00:23:38,720 --> 00:23:41,520
Speaker 1: that he wanted something from me and my kids.

471
00:23:41,880 --> 00:23:43,600
Speaker 2: I felt like me and my daughters were not in.

472
00:23:43,520 --> 00:23:47,159
Speaker 1: A place to give anything emotionally or financially, so I

473
00:23:47,240 --> 00:23:50,159
Speaker 1: recoiled for him. But that doesn't mean that he's a threat.

474
00:23:50,680 --> 00:23:52,959
Speaker 1: My kids went to therapy as well. My twelve year

475
00:23:52,960 --> 00:23:55,439
Speaker 1: old has weekly sessions. However, my eight year old hated it,

476
00:23:55,480 --> 00:23:57,879
Speaker 1: so I've pulled her out for now. Many people have

477
00:23:57,960 --> 00:24:01,439
Speaker 1: shared their own stories being separated from bio relationships and

478
00:24:01,480 --> 00:24:03,960
Speaker 1: the effect that it had on them. I don't understand

479
00:24:04,000 --> 00:24:06,960
Speaker 1: it because genes don't mean that much to me. However,

480
00:24:07,119 --> 00:24:10,280
Speaker 1: I don't have to understand it to respect it. I

481
00:24:10,359 --> 00:24:12,679
Speaker 1: personally don't feel like I'm in any place to have

482
00:24:12,720 --> 00:24:15,320
Speaker 1: any kind of relationship with my husband's son, and I

483
00:24:15,359 --> 00:24:16,639
Speaker 1: don't think he wants one with me.

484
00:24:17,240 --> 00:24:18,320
Speaker 2: He now appears.

485
00:24:17,920 --> 00:24:19,919
Speaker 1: Scared of me, which I do feel bad about. I

486
00:24:20,000 --> 00:24:22,280
Speaker 1: wasn't trying to hurt him or scare him, but I

487
00:24:22,320 --> 00:24:24,840
Speaker 1: will allow him to visit sometimes if my girls want

488
00:24:24,840 --> 00:24:28,560
Speaker 1: to see him. Sister agreed to continue to supervise. As

489
00:24:28,560 --> 00:24:30,960
Speaker 1: far as money goes, the lawyer advised me that there

490
00:24:30,960 --> 00:24:33,880
Speaker 1: aren't many assets that the Sun is entitled to because

491
00:24:34,000 --> 00:24:37,560
Speaker 1: they were in both my and my husband's names, except

492
00:24:37,560 --> 00:24:40,159
Speaker 1: for a few investments accounts that were only in my

493
00:24:40,280 --> 00:24:44,000
Speaker 1: husband's name. Thankfully, they weren't the majority of our savings.

494
00:24:44,640 --> 00:24:46,840
Speaker 1: I know people think I mean evil witch for caring

495
00:24:46,880 --> 00:24:49,800
Speaker 1: about money, but I needed to feed, clothe, and educate

496
00:24:49,880 --> 00:24:52,840
Speaker 1: my own children. Oh man, there's a little bit more,

497
00:24:52,880 --> 00:24:57,159
Speaker 1: but really quickly. Yeah, I see. Now, it's like this

498
00:24:57,280 --> 00:25:02,359
Speaker 1: poor kid, he's coming in and he is trying to go.

499
00:25:02,440 --> 00:25:03,840
Speaker 2: He's going through his own grieving.

500
00:25:03,960 --> 00:25:07,560
Speaker 1: You know, probably did not know his father or have

501
00:25:07,600 --> 00:25:10,320
Speaker 1: a relationship with his father to the degree that he

502
00:25:10,880 --> 00:25:15,159
Speaker 1: wanted to. Is in pain seeing these kids also have

503
00:25:15,320 --> 00:25:19,440
Speaker 1: that kind of relationship with him, Probably just yearning for

504
00:25:19,640 --> 00:25:23,640
Speaker 1: some sort of connection, specifically a familial connection, given that

505
00:25:24,000 --> 00:25:26,560
Speaker 1: he didn't have as much time with his dad as

506
00:25:26,960 --> 00:25:30,520
Speaker 1: it seems he would have wanted to. And he's obviously,

507
00:25:30,520 --> 00:25:33,760
Speaker 1: of course grieving the passing of his dad. And then

508
00:25:33,960 --> 00:25:37,560
Speaker 1: you know, the mother of the children, you know, his

509
00:25:39,119 --> 00:25:43,959
Speaker 1: dad's wife basically is you know, trying to shut him

510
00:25:44,000 --> 00:25:47,520
Speaker 1: out at that point. Oh god, this is just one

511
00:25:47,560 --> 00:25:50,800
Speaker 1: of those where everybody, everybody loses. Guys, I want everyone

512
00:25:50,880 --> 00:25:54,359
Speaker 1: to win. Let's keep going. I don't feel like I

513
00:25:54,400 --> 00:25:56,719
Speaker 1: really count as a step parent. I don't know if

514
00:25:56,760 --> 00:25:58,840
Speaker 1: I'm in the right place for this. When I went

515
00:25:58,880 --> 00:26:01,359
Speaker 1: to other subs for advice, it felt like an angry mob.

516
00:26:01,400 --> 00:26:03,879
Speaker 1: And I'm hoping people might be able to relate to

517
00:26:04,000 --> 00:26:06,600
Speaker 1: some of the things that I'm going through I don't know.

518
00:26:06,720 --> 00:26:08,960
Speaker 1: I didn't know my husband had a son until after

519
00:26:09,040 --> 00:26:11,480
Speaker 1: I became a widow. His son is eighteen and lives

520
00:26:11,480 --> 00:26:14,119
Speaker 1: in the UK, where my husband regularly visited him without

521
00:26:14,160 --> 00:26:17,199
Speaker 1: telling me. My husband apparently kept our family myself and

522
00:26:17,240 --> 00:26:19,879
Speaker 1: my two daughters thirteen and eight, a secret from his

523
00:26:19,960 --> 00:26:22,560
Speaker 1: son as well. The son found out about us after

524
00:26:22,600 --> 00:26:24,520
Speaker 1: my husband passed away and showed up at my door

525
00:26:24,560 --> 00:26:27,120
Speaker 1: to introduce himself. I didn't handle it well at the time.

526
00:26:27,200 --> 00:26:29,439
Speaker 1: I was in a fog and not prepared to process anything,

527
00:26:29,600 --> 00:26:31,560
Speaker 1: let alone the fact that my husband had been hiding

528
00:26:31,560 --> 00:26:33,959
Speaker 1: her secret of such magnitude from me. I let him

529
00:26:34,000 --> 00:26:35,840
Speaker 1: get close to my daughters, but when he said he

530
00:26:35,880 --> 00:26:38,200
Speaker 1: would come back to visit, I reacted negatively and told

531
00:26:38,240 --> 00:26:40,560
Speaker 1: him not to come back. After talking things through with

532
00:26:40,600 --> 00:26:42,439
Speaker 1: my mother and sister, I realized I didn't have the

533
00:26:42,480 --> 00:26:44,640
Speaker 1: right to keep my daughters from their brother. They wanted

534
00:26:44,640 --> 00:26:46,760
Speaker 1: a relationship with him. I reached out to the boy

535
00:26:46,880 --> 00:26:49,359
Speaker 1: to confirm his story and decide on a time to visit.

536
00:26:49,960 --> 00:26:52,919
Speaker 1: It was supposed to be late next month, Okay. My

537
00:26:52,960 --> 00:26:55,879
Speaker 1: sister was supposed to come out and help and supervise

538
00:26:55,920 --> 00:26:58,720
Speaker 1: all interactions between my children and their brother, because I

539
00:26:58,760 --> 00:27:00,920
Speaker 1: am not mentally prepared to be around him, and I'm

540
00:27:00,920 --> 00:27:03,560
Speaker 1: not sure I ever will be. Even though I know

541
00:27:03,640 --> 00:27:06,359
Speaker 1: my feelings are rational, I honestly want nothing to do

542
00:27:06,440 --> 00:27:08,960
Speaker 1: with this boy. I know my husband's behavior is not

543
00:27:09,080 --> 00:27:11,240
Speaker 1: his fault and that he is a victim too, but

544
00:27:11,400 --> 00:27:13,439
Speaker 1: even just looking at his face as a reminder that

545
00:27:13,480 --> 00:27:16,920
Speaker 1: my husband lied to me for our entire relationship. If

546
00:27:16,920 --> 00:27:18,679
Speaker 1: I had known he had a child, I might have

547
00:27:18,840 --> 00:27:21,560
Speaker 1: chose a different life. I got pregnant in college with

548
00:27:21,640 --> 00:27:24,400
Speaker 1: my oldest He was older and with a stable job

549
00:27:24,400 --> 00:27:27,080
Speaker 1: and able to provide for me and my child. He

550
00:27:27,160 --> 00:27:29,159
Speaker 1: made all these promises that he'd take care of me,

551
00:27:29,280 --> 00:27:31,800
Speaker 1: take care of our baby, he'd help me get through college,

552
00:27:31,920 --> 00:27:34,879
Speaker 1: and he'd be the good father he never had, and

553
00:27:34,920 --> 00:27:39,879
Speaker 1: he already had a child that he wasn't raising. God,

554
00:27:40,280 --> 00:27:42,199
Speaker 1: if I had known that, I might have terminated the

555
00:27:42,200 --> 00:27:44,800
Speaker 1: pregnancy and walked away. I fell in love with him

556
00:27:44,840 --> 00:27:46,600
Speaker 1: when he said those things, and now I feel like

557
00:27:46,640 --> 00:27:49,719
Speaker 1: the person I fell in love with never even existed.

558
00:27:50,040 --> 00:27:52,080
Speaker 1: I don't know if he ever loved me or our kids.

559
00:27:52,359 --> 00:27:53,760
Speaker 1: I don't know if he was playing a game with

560
00:27:53,840 --> 00:27:56,000
Speaker 1: us or using us to build an image. I don't

561
00:27:56,000 --> 00:27:57,480
Speaker 1: know if he was faithful to me on all of

562
00:27:57,480 --> 00:28:00,679
Speaker 1: these overseas trips. I can't trust anything he ever told

563
00:28:00,680 --> 00:28:03,960
Speaker 1: me anymore. None of this is the Sun's fault. He's innocent,

564
00:28:04,280 --> 00:28:07,080
Speaker 1: I know that, but even remembering his existence brings up

565
00:28:07,119 --> 00:28:09,840
Speaker 1: so many feelings I can't deal with, which is why

566
00:28:09,920 --> 00:28:12,520
Speaker 1: my sister said that she would help supervise. She played

567
00:28:12,560 --> 00:28:15,600
Speaker 1: chaperone when my husband's son was getting to know my kids. Eventually,

568
00:28:15,920 --> 00:28:18,520
Speaker 1: she said she'd be willing to do it again. We

569
00:28:18,600 --> 00:28:21,600
Speaker 1: picked a time and she said that she would be there. Today,

570
00:28:21,800 --> 00:28:23,920
Speaker 1: she tells me that she can't do it.

571
00:28:24,240 --> 00:28:24,880
Speaker 2: Oh man.

572
00:28:25,080 --> 00:28:27,520
Speaker 1: Her job is understaffed and she can't get the time

573
00:28:27,560 --> 00:28:29,920
Speaker 1: off work. My mom can't do it either, She has

574
00:28:29,920 --> 00:28:32,160
Speaker 1: a surgery coming up and won't be able to travel.

575
00:28:32,600 --> 00:28:34,560
Speaker 1: My dad will also need to be home to take

576
00:28:34,600 --> 00:28:36,920
Speaker 1: care of her. I am not leaving my kids alone

577
00:28:36,960 --> 00:28:39,680
Speaker 1: with their brother what my sister suggested. Since he is

578
00:28:39,720 --> 00:28:42,520
Speaker 1: frankly still a stranger to me and to them, there

579
00:28:42,600 --> 00:28:45,040
Speaker 1: might be a ninety nine percent chance that he's pure intentions,

580
00:28:45,080 --> 00:28:48,040
Speaker 1: but that one percent chance isn't what I'm willing to take.

581
00:28:48,320 --> 00:28:50,520
Speaker 1: There are all kinds of stories out there about children

582
00:28:50,600 --> 00:28:52,520
Speaker 1: being abused from trusted family members.

583
00:28:52,680 --> 00:28:54,680
Speaker 2: Yes, absolutely so.

584
00:28:54,880 --> 00:28:58,080
Speaker 1: My only options are to cancel this visit, which my kids,

585
00:28:58,200 --> 00:29:00,520
Speaker 1: especially my eight year old, are looking forward to. Ooh,

586
00:29:01,240 --> 00:29:03,280
Speaker 1: and I don't want to take away one of the

587
00:29:03,320 --> 00:29:05,800
Speaker 1: few things they've been able to feel happy about since

588
00:29:05,840 --> 00:29:10,000
Speaker 1: my husband passed away, or okay, be the chaperone myself.

589
00:29:10,240 --> 00:29:12,200
Speaker 1: I thought she was about to cancel it. This would

590
00:29:12,200 --> 00:29:14,200
Speaker 1: also mean I need to take time off work. I

591
00:29:14,200 --> 00:29:17,400
Speaker 1: could manage, but it's not ideal. I just don't think

592
00:29:17,480 --> 00:29:19,920
Speaker 1: I can do it. I didn't choose to be a stepmother.

593
00:29:20,240 --> 00:29:22,840
Speaker 1: I'm sure the boy doesn't want me as one either.

594
00:29:23,040 --> 00:29:25,240
Speaker 1: I apparently scared him when I told him not to

595
00:29:25,240 --> 00:29:27,160
Speaker 1: come back, and when we talked on Zoom, since he

596
00:29:27,200 --> 00:29:29,920
Speaker 1: acted nervous and flinchy, like he was afraid I was

597
00:29:29,920 --> 00:29:32,560
Speaker 1: about to hit him or something. I feel bad about that,

598
00:29:32,600 --> 00:29:35,320
Speaker 1: as it wasn't my intention. I don't think I can

599
00:29:35,360 --> 00:29:37,960
Speaker 1: do this. I feel like the meeting is a disaster

600
00:29:38,080 --> 00:29:40,440
Speaker 1: waiting to happen, like it's only a matter of time

601
00:29:40,480 --> 00:29:42,880
Speaker 1: before I lose my temper and ruining and ruin the

602
00:29:42,920 --> 00:29:45,520
Speaker 1: meeting that my kids have been looking forward to. I

603
00:29:45,600 --> 00:29:48,600
Speaker 1: just have this feeling of dread. I don't know if

604
00:29:48,640 --> 00:29:51,120
Speaker 1: anyone can help. Maybe it's a long shot. I have

605
00:29:51,200 --> 00:29:53,360
Speaker 1: therapy on Thursday, and I hope it'll help me sort

606
00:29:53,400 --> 00:29:55,640
Speaker 1: some things out. I feel like I just can't do this.

607
00:29:55,880 --> 00:29:58,200
Speaker 1: It's humiliating to even share this problem with anyone, and

608
00:29:58,280 --> 00:30:00,120
Speaker 1: even if I try to talk things out with one

609
00:30:00,160 --> 00:30:03,200
Speaker 1: of the few people I do trusts. Always think about

610
00:30:03,200 --> 00:30:06,440
Speaker 1: your kids, think about your husband's son, put yourself in

611
00:30:06,480 --> 00:30:09,840
Speaker 1: their shoes. People even show more sympathy for my husband

612
00:30:09,840 --> 00:30:12,560
Speaker 1: than me. Maybe it was a coping mechanism for his

613
00:30:12,640 --> 00:30:15,840
Speaker 1: childhood trauma. Maybe he has a good reason. I'm just

614
00:30:15,880 --> 00:30:18,160
Speaker 1: burnt out on putting everyone else first and trying to

615
00:30:18,200 --> 00:30:18,520
Speaker 1: fill the.

616
00:30:18,560 --> 00:30:20,080
Speaker 2: Role of both parents for my kids.

617
00:30:20,160 --> 00:30:22,880
Speaker 1: Right now, I feel like it's only so long before

618
00:30:22,880 --> 00:30:26,000
Speaker 1: I snap, and the rope is just getting a lot thinner.

619
00:30:26,480 --> 00:30:26,680
Speaker 2: Edit.

620
00:30:26,720 --> 00:30:28,680
Speaker 1: Thank you for all the kind words and advice when

621
00:30:28,720 --> 00:30:30,560
Speaker 1: I posted I was thrown for a loop and on

622
00:30:30,600 --> 00:30:33,120
Speaker 1: the verge of a mental breakdown. Having had some time

623
00:30:33,120 --> 00:30:34,880
Speaker 1: to sleep on it, I feel like things are going

624
00:30:34,880 --> 00:30:37,719
Speaker 1: to turn out okay. I'll look at some of the suggestions,

625
00:30:37,720 --> 00:30:40,560
Speaker 1: such as a professional nanny slash babysitting services to.

626
00:30:40,520 --> 00:30:42,240
Speaker 2: Go along with them. That makes a lot of sense.

627
00:30:42,560 --> 00:30:45,080
Speaker 1: My sister has also said that she might be able

628
00:30:45,160 --> 00:30:47,520
Speaker 1: to work remotely during those weeks and be able to

629
00:30:47,520 --> 00:30:49,800
Speaker 1: supervise while the kids hang out in his hotel room,

630
00:30:49,880 --> 00:30:53,320
Speaker 1: McDonald's library or somewhere else while she could work while watching.

631
00:30:53,440 --> 00:30:55,400
Speaker 1: Not ideal because it means they would have to cancel

632
00:30:55,440 --> 00:30:58,560
Speaker 1: some planned activities. Canceling or postponing the trip would be

633
00:30:58,560 --> 00:31:01,560
Speaker 1: a last resort. I won't make any decision rashly. I'm

634
00:31:01,600 --> 00:31:03,600
Speaker 1: going to take a few days to think about things,

635
00:31:03,960 --> 00:31:05,840
Speaker 1: talk it out with my therapist on Thursday, and have

636
00:31:05,920 --> 00:31:09,240
Speaker 1: a definite answer by Monday. It might not be possible

637
00:31:09,240 --> 00:31:11,760
Speaker 1: for me to supervise. At first, I was panicked because

638
00:31:11,760 --> 00:31:14,080
Speaker 1: I didn't think I would have to and I felt unprepared.

639
00:31:14,400 --> 00:31:16,320
Speaker 1: But I might be able to psyke myself up for

640
00:31:16,400 --> 00:31:19,640
Speaker 1: it with time. I've been through much worse trials than this.

641
00:31:19,920 --> 00:31:22,640
Speaker 1: Sometimes I just need to remind myself that I'm stronger

642
00:31:22,640 --> 00:31:23,200
Speaker 1: than I feel.

643
00:31:23,480 --> 00:31:24,200
Speaker 2: I appreciate the.

644
00:31:24,200 --> 00:31:26,720
Speaker 1: Kindnest sensibility from this community. I wasn't sure if my

645
00:31:26,760 --> 00:31:29,480
Speaker 1: post belonged here, but you all seem much more understanding

646
00:31:29,520 --> 00:31:32,160
Speaker 1: than other subs and I truly appreciate it, and y'all

647
00:31:32,160 --> 00:31:32,760
Speaker 1: were here.

648
00:31:32,920 --> 00:31:34,200
Speaker 2: The final update.

649
00:31:34,560 --> 00:31:36,080
Speaker 1: I don't think I'm going to pose in this community

650
00:31:36,080 --> 00:31:37,600
Speaker 1: more as I don't really count as a step parent,

651
00:31:37,640 --> 00:31:40,080
Speaker 1: but I've got some kind words from people here Previously.

652
00:31:40,240 --> 00:31:41,800
Speaker 1: I just wanted to say thank you all for being

653
00:31:41,880 --> 00:31:44,360
Speaker 1: kind to me and presenting me with solutions when I

654
00:31:44,480 --> 00:31:47,800
Speaker 1: was overwhelmed and panicking, and to let you all know

655
00:31:47,920 --> 00:31:51,200
Speaker 1: how the visit went. So it happened. He stayed for

656
00:31:51,280 --> 00:31:53,560
Speaker 1: about one and a half weeks before he came to over.

657
00:31:53,680 --> 00:31:56,240
Speaker 1: We talked a few times on Zoom with me, him

658
00:31:56,320 --> 00:31:59,080
Speaker 1: and his grandparents. I told him my sister was not

659
00:31:59,120 --> 00:32:01,360
Speaker 1: going to be able to super and I was frank

660
00:32:01,400 --> 00:32:03,880
Speaker 1: about how apprehensive I was feeling about being the one

661
00:32:03,880 --> 00:32:06,680
Speaker 1: to supervise. I don't think he was thrilled about me

662
00:32:06,720 --> 00:32:10,080
Speaker 1: supervising either. He knew and felt comfortable with my sister

663
00:32:10,200 --> 00:32:13,000
Speaker 1: and not me, so the feeling was mutual, but we

664
00:32:13,080 --> 00:32:14,640
Speaker 1: decided to go ahead with the visit.

665
00:32:14,720 --> 00:32:15,200
Speaker 2: Anyways.

666
00:32:15,880 --> 00:32:18,000
Speaker 1: We made a few changes in what they had previously

667
00:32:18,040 --> 00:32:20,880
Speaker 1: planned when my sister was going to supervise, but not many.

668
00:32:21,160 --> 00:32:24,120
Speaker 1: We also discussed contingency plans for something went wrong and

669
00:32:24,160 --> 00:32:26,920
Speaker 1: one of us needed space. Just knowing that I would

670
00:32:26,920 --> 00:32:29,200
Speaker 1: have an out if I needed was a huge relief

671
00:32:29,240 --> 00:32:33,280
Speaker 1: and helped me immensely. Overall, things went relatively well and

672
00:32:33,320 --> 00:32:35,600
Speaker 1: he and I were civil. I got uncomfortable, but not

673
00:32:35,640 --> 00:32:38,240
Speaker 1: to the point where I couldn't cope. He and my

674
00:32:38,280 --> 00:32:40,800
Speaker 1: girls got along well, with the exception of one incident

675
00:32:40,840 --> 00:32:43,240
Speaker 1: where my girls got into a spat with each other

676
00:32:43,520 --> 00:32:45,280
Speaker 1: and he tried to intervene, which made.

677
00:32:45,200 --> 00:32:46,160
Speaker 2: Them both mad at him.

678
00:32:46,400 --> 00:32:50,120
Speaker 1: He happens, but it was quickly resolved after each girl

679
00:32:50,160 --> 00:32:53,240
Speaker 1: had their time stewing about it. I will say he

680
00:32:53,360 --> 00:32:55,360
Speaker 1: was very good with both of my girls, especially my

681
00:32:55,400 --> 00:32:57,560
Speaker 1: eight year old, who has been having a very difficult

682
00:32:57,600 --> 00:33:00,640
Speaker 1: time lately. Even before her father passed away. She's been

683
00:33:00,640 --> 00:33:02,600
Speaker 1: struggling a lot with school and trying to find the

684
00:33:02,680 --> 00:33:06,040
Speaker 1: right treatment for multiple diagnoses. She's been acting out and

685
00:33:06,160 --> 00:33:08,720
Speaker 1: very easily frustrating for a lot of the adults in

686
00:33:08,720 --> 00:33:11,360
Speaker 1: her life, including me. I admit I love her and

687
00:33:11,400 --> 00:33:13,960
Speaker 1: I do my best, but she is difficult sometimes. But

688
00:33:14,040 --> 00:33:17,080
Speaker 1: with her brother, it seems like their kindred spirits or something.

689
00:33:17,280 --> 00:33:19,120
Speaker 1: He was a real true for acting out scenes from

690
00:33:19,120 --> 00:33:21,760
Speaker 1: the movie in Conto with her over and over.

691
00:33:22,000 --> 00:33:23,280
Speaker 2: That is cute, y'all.

692
00:33:23,360 --> 00:33:26,840
Speaker 1: That that is, that is the adorable do that is

693
00:33:26,880 --> 00:33:30,000
Speaker 1: the dose. That is the dose of adorable that we needed.

694
00:33:30,440 --> 00:33:34,240
Speaker 1: My goodness, I realize it is probably really good for

695
00:33:34,320 --> 00:33:36,160
Speaker 1: her to have an adult in her life who doesn't

696
00:33:36,160 --> 00:33:39,760
Speaker 1: want anything from her but except to I realize it

697
00:33:39,800 --> 00:33:41,800
Speaker 1: is probably really good for her to have an adult

698
00:33:41,800 --> 00:33:44,320
Speaker 1: in her life who doesn't want anything from her except

699
00:33:44,360 --> 00:33:45,360
Speaker 1: to spend time with her.

700
00:33:45,680 --> 00:33:49,120
Speaker 2: Y'all, my heart, my grinch heart. After the story just

701
00:33:49,120 --> 00:33:53,280
Speaker 2: grew three sizes bigger. Yes, thank you. Oh.

702
00:33:53,320 --> 00:33:55,680
Speaker 1: Before the boy left, I gave him a thank you

703
00:33:55,720 --> 00:33:58,640
Speaker 1: card expressing this to him and that I do genuinely

704
00:33:59,040 --> 00:34:02,320
Speaker 1: hope he chooses to stay involved. Overall, it was a

705
00:34:02,360 --> 00:34:04,880
Speaker 1: positive thing, and I'm glad that he went ahead with

706
00:34:04,960 --> 00:34:07,560
Speaker 1: the visit. And thank you to those of you who

707
00:34:07,720 --> 00:34:11,520
Speaker 1: left supportive comments. It was a much better experience posting

708
00:34:11,560 --> 00:34:17,080
Speaker 1: here than when I've tried to seek advice in other subs.

709
00:34:18,280 --> 00:34:26,120
Speaker 1: Drop a bomb editor, Oh man, did I lie to y'all?

710
00:34:26,680 --> 00:34:28,520
Speaker 1: Did I fib did I cap?

711
00:34:28,880 --> 00:34:29,120
Speaker 2: Yes?

712
00:34:29,480 --> 00:34:34,240
Speaker 1: This is the insanity section of Reddit over here, guys.

713
00:34:34,480 --> 00:34:39,360
Speaker 1: Oh my goodness, Okay, we've reached the end. We have

714
00:34:40,080 --> 00:34:43,600
Speaker 1: come to the conclusion. So a few thoughts here. I'm

715
00:34:43,640 --> 00:34:45,920
Speaker 1: glad that Op. I think OPI kind of went through

716
00:34:45,920 --> 00:34:49,040
Speaker 1: this journey, like you know, that's like the seven stages

717
00:34:49,040 --> 00:34:51,440
Speaker 1: of grief and emotions and things of that nature. I

718
00:34:51,440 --> 00:34:53,920
Speaker 1: feel like Op went in her own personal journey of

719
00:34:54,000 --> 00:34:58,360
Speaker 1: like you know, being apprehensive letting it happen, then coming

720
00:34:58,400 --> 00:35:00,600
Speaker 1: back around and realizing maybe there were certain ways in

721
00:35:00,640 --> 00:35:04,360
Speaker 1: which she handled it that was maybe very hurtful for

722
00:35:05,000 --> 00:35:08,720
Speaker 1: her husband's son, who again is also like the victim

723
00:35:08,760 --> 00:35:12,440
Speaker 1: in this scenario, is actually her husband's son, et cetera,

724
00:35:12,560 --> 00:35:13,000
Speaker 1: et cetera.

725
00:35:14,080 --> 00:35:16,480
Speaker 2: So I was very glad to see.

726
00:35:16,800 --> 00:35:20,080
Speaker 1: That and that, you know, the kids are able to reconnect,

727
00:35:20,120 --> 00:35:22,560
Speaker 1: because look, all of them have lost All of the

728
00:35:22,640 --> 00:35:25,239
Speaker 1: children have lost their father. Op has lost both her

729
00:35:25,320 --> 00:35:28,400
Speaker 1: husband and really like the memory of her husband because

730
00:35:28,400 --> 00:35:33,000
Speaker 1: now she can't really trust anything that he said or

731
00:35:33,080 --> 00:35:36,600
Speaker 1: did for her in their relationship. The fact that maybe

732
00:35:36,640 --> 00:35:40,600
Speaker 1: there is a silver lining here where the three siblings

733
00:35:40,640 --> 00:35:44,799
Speaker 1: can build a relationship together with each other coming out

734
00:35:44,840 --> 00:35:49,400
Speaker 1: of a kind of awful situation. But I'm really hoping

735
00:35:49,440 --> 00:35:52,200
Speaker 1: and praying that that is the consolation prize, I guess

736
00:35:52,200 --> 00:35:55,879
Speaker 1: of sorts in this scenario because it's just so hard

737
00:35:55,920 --> 00:36:00,879
Speaker 1: on everybody, Like everybody was just going through very traumatizing

738
00:36:00,920 --> 00:36:05,000
Speaker 1: for every single person with their respective experiences, and I god,

739
00:36:05,160 --> 00:36:07,319
Speaker 1: I just I just really feel for them. But you know,

740
00:36:07,520 --> 00:36:09,640
Speaker 1: hearing the brother being able to connect with the eight

741
00:36:09,760 --> 00:36:12,920
Speaker 1: year old and everything like that was really sweet. So

742
00:36:13,040 --> 00:36:16,640
Speaker 1: I'm really hoping for the best here again, y'all. Please

743
00:36:16,920 --> 00:36:19,920
Speaker 1: drop your thoughts on this below, And if you have

744
00:36:20,160 --> 00:36:24,200
Speaker 1: any you know, secret surprise family, you know, kids coming

745
00:36:24,239 --> 00:36:27,600
Speaker 1: out of the woodwork, etc. Stories, we would love to

746
00:36:27,640 --> 00:36:30,880
Speaker 1: hear from you, hear your perspective on this one. Please

747
00:36:30,960 --> 00:36:35,200
Speaker 1: comment below and share your thoughts, share your own personal experiences. Also,

748
00:36:35,239 --> 00:36:37,160
Speaker 1: if you want us to read on the show, go

749
00:36:37,200 --> 00:36:40,160
Speaker 1: to our slash okop show on our subreddit. Drop it

750
00:36:40,200 --> 00:36:43,280
Speaker 1: in there. My goodness, y'all, I'm gonna I'm gonna.

751
00:36:43,080 --> 00:36:45,319
Speaker 2: Need need a simple water. I need to need some

752
00:36:45,480 --> 00:36:46,160
Speaker 2: ogwa to.

753
00:36:46,360 --> 00:36:50,520
Speaker 1: Hydrate myself after the insanity of that story. But you

754
00:36:50,560 --> 00:36:53,280
Speaker 1: know what, let's get into the next one. I'm demanding

755
00:36:53,280 --> 00:36:55,720
Speaker 1: a paternity test for my wife. I don't have proof,

756
00:36:55,840 --> 00:36:58,040
Speaker 1: I just want it, but she revealed the truth that

757
00:36:58,120 --> 00:37:02,880
Speaker 1: might destroy our family. There have been too many times,

758
00:37:03,480 --> 00:37:07,640
Speaker 1: too many times on this show and in the universe

759
00:37:07,840 --> 00:37:10,920
Speaker 1: where the guys are like, duh, I don't think this

760
00:37:11,080 --> 00:37:12,040
Speaker 1: baby looks like me.

761
00:37:12,480 --> 00:37:15,160
Speaker 2: This baby can't have blue eyes. We don't have blue eyes.

762
00:37:16,280 --> 00:37:24,600
Speaker 1: Please understand one ninth grade biology by the textbook as Google,

763
00:37:24,640 --> 00:37:29,480
Speaker 1: last JVD, and number freaking two. Why do you do

764
00:37:29,640 --> 00:37:33,920
Speaker 1: this with no proof, with no evidence? Why do we

765
00:37:33,960 --> 00:37:36,400
Speaker 1: ask these questions? I don't know, we don't know what

766
00:37:36,520 --> 00:37:43,040
Speaker 1: this story holds. But look, just just please please for us,

767
00:37:44,200 --> 00:37:46,839
Speaker 1: I go to the pain of There's been so many

768
00:37:46,880 --> 00:37:50,319
Speaker 1: stupid stories, but I digress. Let me get off my

769
00:37:50,400 --> 00:37:52,400
Speaker 1: ted talk and let me get into this red of story.

770
00:37:53,160 --> 00:37:55,200
Speaker 1: Me and my wife of three years have a baby girl,

771
00:37:55,239 --> 00:37:58,040
Speaker 1: and she's two. They're my world, and honestly, I've been

772
00:37:58,080 --> 00:38:01,600
Speaker 1: beating myself up even having the thoughts. But recently I've

773
00:38:01,680 --> 00:38:08,400
Speaker 1: doubted that she's really my biological daughter. Oh buddy, buddy, buddy,

774
00:38:08,600 --> 00:38:10,719
Speaker 1: pale amigo.

775
00:38:10,520 --> 00:38:15,360
Speaker 2: Oh bray, please tell me you have a reason. Please.

776
00:38:16,160 --> 00:38:18,640
Speaker 1: We have similarities, but there are certain things that have

777
00:38:18,800 --> 00:38:21,840
Speaker 1: me second guessing. My wife and I both have green eyes.

778
00:38:22,000 --> 00:38:25,080
Speaker 1: I'm mixed and she's Italian and American. My baby is

779
00:38:25,120 --> 00:38:27,520
Speaker 1: brown eyes, and I know it's possible for two green

780
00:38:27,520 --> 00:38:29,919
Speaker 1: eyed parents to have a brown eyed baby, but I've

781
00:38:29,920 --> 00:38:30,640
Speaker 1: read it's rare.

782
00:38:31,160 --> 00:38:32,439
Speaker 2: At least this guy has read.

783
00:38:32,480 --> 00:38:35,720
Speaker 1: Okay, that's more I can say for ninety nine percent

784
00:38:35,760 --> 00:38:38,160
Speaker 1: of these stories. A few years back, I had to

785
00:38:38,200 --> 00:38:40,680
Speaker 1: travel for work and I had my suspicions that my

786
00:38:40,719 --> 00:38:44,240
Speaker 1: wife was cheating. But the thought alone brought me to tears.

787
00:38:44,640 --> 00:38:47,040
Speaker 1: I've discussed it with her, and she assured me that

788
00:38:47,120 --> 00:38:49,520
Speaker 1: she was loyal to me. She has cheated in her

789
00:38:49,560 --> 00:38:52,200
Speaker 1: previous relationships, but I didn't want to judge based on

790
00:38:52,239 --> 00:38:54,640
Speaker 1: that because she was in high school and we've all

791
00:38:54,680 --> 00:38:57,680
Speaker 1: done dumb shit we regret as kids. Yeah, like the

792
00:38:57,760 --> 00:39:01,839
Speaker 1: high school stuff. You really can't I think pin pin

793
00:39:02,000 --> 00:39:04,600
Speaker 1: that to people. We've talked about that before in this show.

794
00:39:04,600 --> 00:39:08,640
Speaker 1: It's like you just you're just too young. And a

795
00:39:08,640 --> 00:39:11,680
Speaker 1: lot of these scenarios, it's like stupid, silly shit. You

796
00:39:11,719 --> 00:39:17,080
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying. But I don't know. I mean, again,

797
00:39:17,160 --> 00:39:22,320
Speaker 1: I would ask what was it on this trip? Something

798
00:39:22,440 --> 00:39:25,680
Speaker 1: had to arouse questions in his mind, like what what

799
00:39:26,000 --> 00:39:28,440
Speaker 1: was it? Well, like where where where are the details?

800
00:39:28,560 --> 00:39:29,640
Speaker 1: Like it could have been?

801
00:39:29,840 --> 00:39:30,359
Speaker 2: Could have been?

802
00:39:30,480 --> 00:39:34,040
Speaker 1: But again, I just I just see so many so

803
00:39:34,120 --> 00:39:37,040
Speaker 1: many men of these stories just just come out of nowhere.

804
00:39:37,120 --> 00:39:41,120
Speaker 1: They watch one Andrew tait witdeo of like, oh, women cheat,

805
00:39:41,280 --> 00:39:44,200
Speaker 1: so you must attack them at whole times to protect

806
00:39:44,239 --> 00:39:48,920
Speaker 1: your to protect your kinghood king, And I'm just like, damn,

807
00:39:49,840 --> 00:39:53,000
Speaker 1: but let's keep going. I've discussed my concerns with her,

808
00:39:53,480 --> 00:39:56,719
Speaker 1: and to say I cause an argument would be an understatement.

809
00:39:56,760 --> 00:39:59,759
Speaker 1: Sharing about his doubts of the child being his, she

810
00:39:59,760 --> 00:40:03,040
Speaker 1: got extremely upset and asked me how I could insinuate

811
00:40:03,120 --> 00:40:05,600
Speaker 1: that she would ever cheat on me or that my

812
00:40:05,719 --> 00:40:09,120
Speaker 1: baby isn't mine. I've spoken to her in the past

813
00:40:09,120 --> 00:40:11,960
Speaker 1: about my doubts and she told me she would never cheat.

814
00:40:12,280 --> 00:40:15,320
Speaker 1: I brought it up again and said I had my doubts,

815
00:40:15,320 --> 00:40:18,480
Speaker 1: but I'll drop it and apologized. She got very defensive

816
00:40:18,560 --> 00:40:21,720
Speaker 1: and started crying, I guess you want a paternity test

817
00:40:21,800 --> 00:40:27,400
Speaker 1: since you don't believe me. Man again like bringing up although,

818
00:40:28,320 --> 00:40:30,680
Speaker 1: of course a lot of cheats out there, like what

819
00:40:30,719 --> 00:40:33,080
Speaker 1: would they say, and they'd be like, nah, I'm not cheating,

820
00:40:33,239 --> 00:40:35,239
Speaker 1: Like yeah, okay, a lot of cheaters just fa with that,

821
00:40:35,440 --> 00:40:37,879
Speaker 1: But like, again.

822
00:40:37,760 --> 00:40:40,040
Speaker 2: Just where is it coming from?

823
00:40:40,120 --> 00:40:44,640
Speaker 1: If you catch some texts of you know where your

824
00:40:45,120 --> 00:40:48,080
Speaker 1: wife and your personal trainer, Like, hey, girl, let me

825
00:40:48,120 --> 00:40:53,080
Speaker 1: see some of those progress picks, Like yeah, yeah, there

826
00:40:53,080 --> 00:40:55,719
Speaker 1: are times you find evidence all these things. Yes, but

827
00:40:56,520 --> 00:41:00,480
Speaker 1: we just don't have a lot of context here, Like

828
00:41:00,600 --> 00:41:04,480
Speaker 1: I I'm a little I'm a little lost with you.

829
00:41:04,920 --> 00:41:07,480
Speaker 1: I said no, but after speaking with my family about it,

830
00:41:07,560 --> 00:41:10,960
Speaker 1: I think I may want one just to clear my mind.

831
00:41:11,440 --> 00:41:15,040
Speaker 1: If she's mine, I'll hate myself forever being doubtful. But

832
00:41:15,120 --> 00:41:18,320
Speaker 1: if she's not, I still haven't thought about the consequences

833
00:41:18,320 --> 00:41:19,200
Speaker 1: that I can bring.

834
00:41:20,000 --> 00:41:20,200
Speaker 2: Bro.

835
00:41:20,920 --> 00:41:23,840
Speaker 1: You're literally saying like, oh, I haven't thought to the consequences.

836
00:41:24,239 --> 00:41:25,160
Speaker 2: Think about them.

837
00:41:25,280 --> 00:41:31,640
Speaker 1: Now take the time, pour some tea, sit down, grab

838
00:41:31,680 --> 00:41:32,280
Speaker 1: a journal.

839
00:41:33,560 --> 00:41:34,040
Speaker 2: I don't know.

840
00:41:34,160 --> 00:41:37,680
Speaker 1: I don't know what to do, Bro, Just please please

841
00:41:37,719 --> 00:41:40,480
Speaker 1: for me. Guys, I'm gonna have an eight or over here.

842
00:41:40,520 --> 00:41:40,879
Speaker 2: I'm back.

843
00:41:40,920 --> 00:41:44,840
Speaker 1: I'm back in the freaking the freaking fraternity tests Maury

844
00:41:45,000 --> 00:41:48,760
Speaker 1: mcu hospital over here, just like, oh my last line again,

845
00:41:49,440 --> 00:41:52,120
Speaker 1: My goodness. She is my daughter and I love her

846
00:41:52,200 --> 00:41:56,160
Speaker 1: no matter what. But what would that do to my marriage?

847
00:41:56,640 --> 00:41:59,239
Speaker 1: This has caused me so much internal conflict, and I've

848
00:41:59,280 --> 00:42:02,720
Speaker 1: spent nights thinking I could be making the biggest mistake

849
00:42:03,120 --> 00:42:04,000
Speaker 1: of my life.

850
00:42:04,719 --> 00:42:05,359
Speaker 2: You could be.

851
00:42:06,280 --> 00:42:08,360
Speaker 1: If anyone has any advice or has been in a

852
00:42:08,440 --> 00:42:11,520
Speaker 1: similar situation from mine or from my wife's perspective, it

853
00:42:11,560 --> 00:42:16,520
Speaker 1: would be greatly appreciated. There is a big update, but

854
00:42:16,640 --> 00:42:19,840
Speaker 1: let's get into the breakdown. You know, one thing I

855
00:42:19,880 --> 00:42:23,839
Speaker 1: will say is we've seen some really bad cases of this,

856
00:42:24,040 --> 00:42:27,640
Speaker 1: like like straight up going into the manisphere and then

857
00:42:27,680 --> 00:42:31,400
Speaker 1: that coming out of that just like or just like

858
00:42:31,960 --> 00:42:34,440
Speaker 1: stupid things where someone's like, oh, the kid doesn't look

859
00:42:34,520 --> 00:42:37,319
Speaker 1: like me, So I just I'm like, did you have

860
00:42:37,360 --> 00:42:41,200
Speaker 1: a kid with another guy? You know, That's that's a

861
00:42:41,239 --> 00:42:43,839
Speaker 1: lot of times in the stories that we've seen on

862
00:42:43,920 --> 00:42:47,920
Speaker 1: this channel, what has happened. He seems to have a

863
00:42:47,960 --> 00:42:52,239
Speaker 1: little more a wherewithal than our average our average protagonist

864
00:42:52,320 --> 00:42:53,400
Speaker 1: in these kinds of stories.

865
00:42:54,280 --> 00:42:57,200
Speaker 2: But man, it's just you know, when you ask.

866
00:42:57,040 --> 00:43:00,480
Speaker 1: For a paternity test, you just gotta be ready for

867
00:43:00,800 --> 00:43:04,440
Speaker 1: what comes with it. You are insinuating not only not

868
00:43:04,560 --> 00:43:08,279
Speaker 1: only did your partner cheat on you, but they also

869
00:43:08,440 --> 00:43:12,680
Speaker 1: had a child with someone else, hid it from you,

870
00:43:13,120 --> 00:43:17,239
Speaker 1: and are coercing you basically into raising this child. Like

871
00:43:17,600 --> 00:43:21,120
Speaker 1: that is the implications of when you ask for a

872
00:43:21,320 --> 00:43:24,320
Speaker 1: paternity test. There, of course, other times on this show

873
00:43:24,520 --> 00:43:27,680
Speaker 1: where someone walks into a room and they're getting plowed

874
00:43:27,719 --> 00:43:31,080
Speaker 1: down going to poundtown, and yeah, okay, there you go.

875
00:43:31,160 --> 00:43:35,000
Speaker 1: There's some evidence to arouse some suspicions as well as

876
00:43:35,120 --> 00:43:36,719
Speaker 1: some other things, if you know what I mean. But

877
00:43:37,880 --> 00:43:41,880
Speaker 1: I digress. You know, maybe maybe we'll get the DNA

878
00:43:42,000 --> 00:43:46,400
Speaker 1: test and see usually we do. But without further ado,

879
00:43:46,880 --> 00:43:50,600
Speaker 1: let's get into this update comment below right now, with

880
00:43:50,719 --> 00:43:54,759
Speaker 1: this timestamp, With this timestamp, if you think that the

881
00:43:54,800 --> 00:43:58,600
Speaker 1: baby is ops or not, let's let's let's see. Let's

882
00:43:58,600 --> 00:44:01,080
Speaker 1: see if we get one updates. I don't know if

883
00:44:01,080 --> 00:44:02,840
Speaker 1: this is the right way to make an update post.

884
00:44:02,920 --> 00:44:04,919
Speaker 1: I did make an edit on my original. I wasn't

885
00:44:04,960 --> 00:44:09,080
Speaker 1: expecting to make this update, especially the day after This

886
00:44:09,160 --> 00:44:12,000
Speaker 1: conversation with my wife isn't new, but from the point

887
00:44:12,000 --> 00:44:14,120
Speaker 1: where I made the comment, she's been very cold and

888
00:44:14,160 --> 00:44:16,759
Speaker 1: threatening our marriage, saying I better not get the test

889
00:44:16,800 --> 00:44:19,319
Speaker 1: done behind her back, and she would not allow it

890
00:44:19,360 --> 00:44:21,640
Speaker 1: to happen at all. I read comments from a lot

891
00:44:21,640 --> 00:44:24,120
Speaker 1: of women saying that they'd be pissed to either way

892
00:44:24,200 --> 00:44:27,480
Speaker 1: if the test was positive or negative from mistrust, so

893
00:44:28,040 --> 00:44:30,160
Speaker 1: I thought that was the case. I mean, if it

894
00:44:30,200 --> 00:44:33,879
Speaker 1: turns out that the kid isn't his. Then, yeah, then

895
00:44:33,960 --> 00:44:37,880
Speaker 1: that's very bad from the wife's perspective too, right, but

896
00:44:38,880 --> 00:44:41,120
Speaker 1: let's keep going like Loki.

897
00:44:40,920 --> 00:44:43,560
Speaker 2: A kind of a dig move. I mean, come on, helone.

898
00:44:44,000 --> 00:44:46,560
Speaker 1: We did have a long conversation this morning. She looked

899
00:44:46,600 --> 00:44:48,960
Speaker 1: through my phone last night and found the post. That's

900
00:44:48,960 --> 00:44:51,560
Speaker 1: what sparked the conversation up again. She said she was

901
00:44:51,640 --> 00:44:53,680
Speaker 1: hurt that I would keep bringing this up and I

902
00:44:53,719 --> 00:44:57,040
Speaker 1: should trust her and leave my insecurities behind. It was

903
00:44:57,080 --> 00:44:59,839
Speaker 1: a long conversation, a lot of tears and words were said.

904
00:45:00,280 --> 00:45:03,000
Speaker 1: I offered marriage counseling and dropped the topic of the

905
00:45:03,080 --> 00:45:06,640
Speaker 1: DNA test. She refused and said it's ridiculous and doesn't

906
00:45:06,640 --> 00:45:11,440
Speaker 1: want to involve anyone else in our marriage. Okay, counseling

907
00:45:11,719 --> 00:45:14,440
Speaker 1: and receiving therapy and things of that nature. That is,

908
00:45:15,800 --> 00:45:20,560
Speaker 1: that is perfectly fine. That honestly makes me raise a

909
00:45:20,600 --> 00:45:24,040
Speaker 1: flag like OPI is. Opie's wife is obviously very adamant

910
00:45:24,080 --> 00:45:27,200
Speaker 1: about not getting a DNA test and all these other things,

911
00:45:27,760 --> 00:45:32,480
Speaker 1: which in many ways is understandable. But with the no counseling,

912
00:45:32,640 --> 00:45:34,800
Speaker 1: that is kind of like, what's the issue.

913
00:45:34,840 --> 00:45:35,919
Speaker 2: Why why not.

914
00:45:35,960 --> 00:45:40,560
Speaker 1: Involve a professional who helps people for a living, try

915
00:45:40,560 --> 00:45:42,640
Speaker 1: to sort through their marriage and get a set of

916
00:45:42,640 --> 00:45:45,280
Speaker 1: outside eyes, like I don't know, for me, like always getting.

917
00:45:45,040 --> 00:45:46,520
Speaker 2: A set of outside eyes on anything.

918
00:45:47,000 --> 00:45:50,200
Speaker 1: I especially think in really deep interpersonal things where it's

919
00:45:50,239 --> 00:45:52,000
Speaker 1: so easy to get caught up in our own emotions

920
00:45:52,080 --> 00:45:54,840
Speaker 1: is like a win. I would say that's a big

921
00:45:54,920 --> 00:45:59,680
Speaker 1: fat positive. But to each their own, I guess. I

922
00:45:59,719 --> 00:46:02,120
Speaker 1: read a lot of comments and stories saying that sometimes

923
00:46:02,120 --> 00:46:04,480
Speaker 1: the guilt will get to them and they'll just confess

924
00:46:04,640 --> 00:46:07,239
Speaker 1: without needing to do a test. I didn't think that

925
00:46:07,239 --> 00:46:11,200
Speaker 1: would happen in my case, but it did. Oh my,

926
00:46:12,719 --> 00:46:17,960
Speaker 1: oh no. She told me that she didn't want this

927
00:46:18,040 --> 00:46:21,759
Speaker 1: to happen, but she did cheat on me, and my

928
00:46:22,080 --> 00:46:29,960
Speaker 1: daughter is not mine. Oh my god, oh my god. Wow,

929
00:46:30,560 --> 00:46:34,000
Speaker 1: did you guess it right? Didn't even need the DNA test?

930
00:46:34,360 --> 00:46:40,719
Speaker 1: Oh damn, damn Daniel name, Oh god, I.

931
00:46:40,640 --> 00:46:41,400
Speaker 2: Can now it all.

932
00:46:41,480 --> 00:46:43,520
Speaker 1: And I was beginning to piece it together a little

933
00:46:43,560 --> 00:46:46,920
Speaker 1: bit with like, wait, no counseling. You're very adamant about

934
00:46:46,960 --> 00:46:49,760
Speaker 1: no DNA test, and like the way you were adamant

935
00:46:49,800 --> 00:46:50,839
Speaker 1: about it, you know what I mean?

936
00:46:51,600 --> 00:46:57,160
Speaker 2: Oh boy, oh no, op, oh god, oh no, oh no,

937
00:46:57,280 --> 00:47:00,439
Speaker 2: it's all. It's all coming together in the worst way.

938
00:47:01,680 --> 00:47:03,960
Speaker 1: She said she wanted me to be the father and

939
00:47:04,080 --> 00:47:07,680
Speaker 1: loved me and thought this would be her best option. Ooh,

940
00:47:09,080 --> 00:47:12,960
Speaker 1: the best option to lie to someone and have them

941
00:47:13,040 --> 00:47:13,760
Speaker 1: raise a child.

942
00:47:13,800 --> 00:47:17,920
Speaker 2: It isn't theirs, the best option for who? For whom?

943
00:47:18,520 --> 00:47:22,640
Speaker 2: For whom? Lady? Like, what are we doing here?

944
00:47:23,239 --> 00:47:25,799
Speaker 1: Oh? She didn't want me to take a test and

945
00:47:25,960 --> 00:47:28,800
Speaker 1: find out on my own, which I wish you would

946
00:47:28,800 --> 00:47:33,960
Speaker 1: have come clean way before. Yes, like, I don't know

947
00:47:34,280 --> 00:47:37,560
Speaker 1: before the baby's born. I didn't know how to respond,

948
00:47:37,600 --> 00:47:39,960
Speaker 1: but asked who the father was because my mind is

949
00:47:40,040 --> 00:47:43,239
Speaker 1: already making a million assumptions. She didn't tell me and

950
00:47:43,280 --> 00:47:46,480
Speaker 1: began crying more, telling me not to hate her and

951
00:47:46,560 --> 00:47:47,880
Speaker 1: not to end the marriage.

952
00:47:48,320 --> 00:47:53,319
Speaker 2: Okay, what do you got for us? Oh?

953
00:47:53,360 --> 00:47:56,360
Speaker 1: My god, I feel like I feel like I'm hosting

954
00:47:56,480 --> 00:47:59,320
Speaker 1: kids show and it's like, you know, freakin' bar Like, hey, kids,

955
00:47:59,600 --> 00:48:03,040
Speaker 1: guess what surprise Barney's got hiding for you around the corner,

956
00:48:03,400 --> 00:48:08,640
Speaker 1: and it's divorce papers. Barney serving divorce papers would blow

957
00:48:08,719 --> 00:48:11,399
Speaker 1: key me fired though. He literally comes in and he's

958
00:48:11,400 --> 00:48:15,279
Speaker 1: just like, you've been divorced. I don't love you, you

959
00:48:15,400 --> 00:48:19,799
Speaker 1: don't love me. We're divorce, no family, and no and

960
00:48:19,880 --> 00:48:21,560
Speaker 1: I'll kick you out from my house.

961
00:48:21,600 --> 00:48:26,160
Speaker 2: Fuck you, I hate you? You hate me too? Damn,

962
00:48:26,560 --> 00:48:28,520
Speaker 2: I just remixed Barney over here. What the fick?

963
00:48:29,360 --> 00:48:32,200
Speaker 1: I didn't say anything again, waiting for the answer. This

964
00:48:32,280 --> 00:48:34,800
Speaker 1: happened early this morning, and I didn't get the answer

965
00:48:35,560 --> 00:48:39,080
Speaker 1: until this afternoon. I had to leave for work this morning,

966
00:48:39,160 --> 00:48:40,960
Speaker 1: so when I came back, she had calmed down a

967
00:48:40,960 --> 00:48:44,239
Speaker 1: bit and was ready to tell me. Her answer was

968
00:48:44,280 --> 00:48:48,799
Speaker 1: probably the last thing I was expecting. She cried while

969
00:48:48,840 --> 00:48:51,200
Speaker 1: saying this, But she said a few years back, I

970
00:48:51,239 --> 00:48:55,520
Speaker 1: went on a business trip and she slept with my father,

971
00:48:55,960 --> 00:49:00,239
Speaker 1: who she ran into on a drunk night. I don't

972
00:49:00,440 --> 00:49:06,120
Speaker 1: believe it. I'm speechless. What words, what words? What words

973
00:49:06,160 --> 00:49:09,879
Speaker 1: do I have? What words do I have? What would

974
00:49:09,880 --> 00:49:13,120
Speaker 1: the DNA test have shown? Obviously obviously not close enough

975
00:49:13,120 --> 00:49:16,920
Speaker 1: to be the son? His son? Oh peace son? But

976
00:49:17,560 --> 00:49:22,120
Speaker 1: oh my god, oh my god, you had a child

977
00:49:22,239 --> 00:49:26,200
Speaker 1: with his father and you didn't tell him anything.

978
00:49:26,880 --> 00:49:27,400
Speaker 2: Wow?

979
00:49:27,440 --> 00:49:29,839
Speaker 1: How can like living with a secret like that? Must

980
00:49:29,840 --> 00:49:33,839
Speaker 1: be so insane? No wonder she was so defensive. Oh

981
00:49:33,920 --> 00:49:37,680
Speaker 1: my god. Jesus man, we need some Jesus on here.

982
00:49:37,760 --> 00:49:38,800
Speaker 1: Jesus take the wheel.

983
00:49:38,840 --> 00:49:40,360
Speaker 2: Please please.

984
00:49:42,440 --> 00:49:45,279
Speaker 1: My father passed away in December from colon cancer when

985
00:49:45,280 --> 00:49:48,680
Speaker 1: he was forty five, that is young. He did meet

986
00:49:48,680 --> 00:49:52,600
Speaker 1: my daughter half sister, his daughter, I don't know, but

987
00:49:52,800 --> 00:49:56,000
Speaker 1: never said anything clearly. She said they both decided it

988
00:49:56,040 --> 00:49:59,239
Speaker 1: was a dumb mistake, a major understatement. That is a

989
00:49:59,320 --> 00:50:02,759
Speaker 1: major understan and it'd be best to erase it and

990
00:50:02,880 --> 00:50:10,960
Speaker 1: play me as being the father. Oh oh, oh.

991
00:50:10,320 --> 00:50:11,120
Speaker 2: Why lie?

992
00:50:12,239 --> 00:50:16,359
Speaker 1: Why this man deserves to know the truth. This isn't

993
00:50:16,360 --> 00:50:19,680
Speaker 1: his child. You had it with with his father.

994
00:50:20,200 --> 00:50:20,520
Speaker 2: Father.

995
00:50:20,800 --> 00:50:23,040
Speaker 1: You should tell your son the truth because he is

996
00:50:23,080 --> 00:50:27,279
Speaker 1: your son, and you impregnated his wife and are having

997
00:50:27,320 --> 00:50:32,799
Speaker 1: him raise the baby and not knowing God. Me and

998
00:50:32,840 --> 00:50:35,480
Speaker 1: my father never had the best relationship. I grew up

999
00:50:35,520 --> 00:50:37,640
Speaker 1: with my single mom, but he was president in my

1000
00:50:37,680 --> 00:50:40,080
Speaker 1: life and when he passed it hurt my family a lot,

1001
00:50:40,960 --> 00:50:44,319
Speaker 1: so hearing this broke me. I am currently staying with

1002
00:50:44,360 --> 00:50:47,400
Speaker 1: my brother. I haven't spoken about what I've learned with anyone,

1003
00:50:47,480 --> 00:50:50,600
Speaker 1: even him. I don't think I've fully processed, so coming

1004
00:50:50,680 --> 00:50:53,320
Speaker 1: here to write this felt good, like a good place

1005
00:50:53,360 --> 00:50:56,080
Speaker 1: to get my thoughts out. I didn't say anything after

1006
00:50:56,120 --> 00:50:59,080
Speaker 1: she told me that, and just left after she finished explaining.

1007
00:50:59,360 --> 00:51:01,440
Speaker 1: I don't know where I even go from here. I

1008
00:51:01,480 --> 00:51:04,360
Speaker 1: don't want to abandon my child while she's technically my

1009
00:51:04,560 --> 00:51:09,200
Speaker 1: half sister God, but I do need time to process this.

1010
00:51:09,719 --> 00:51:12,879
Speaker 1: I don't think any amount of marriage therapy will fix this.

1011
00:51:13,239 --> 00:51:16,680
Speaker 1: So divorce is my next step. That is fine, bro,

1012
00:51:16,920 --> 00:51:21,040
Speaker 1: go for a devorce, divorce, devorce, so the devorce chat

1013
00:51:21,040 --> 00:51:24,239
Speaker 1: in the comments, one time for the one time for

1014
00:51:24,320 --> 00:51:27,000
Speaker 1: our poor man op over here, I am going to

1015
00:51:27,040 --> 00:51:30,680
Speaker 1: seek a therapist for myself good and help myself so

1016
00:51:30,760 --> 00:51:32,280
Speaker 1: I can be there.

1017
00:51:32,320 --> 00:51:34,320
Speaker 2: For my daughter.

1018
00:51:34,880 --> 00:51:42,480
Speaker 1: Oh my heart here it is Baron exploding. Cannot process

1019
00:51:42,520 --> 00:51:52,120
Speaker 1: all these emotions. I told you, Oh man, golly, golly, ladies, ladies, Jenny, Ladies,

1020
00:51:52,160 --> 00:51:52,960
Speaker 1: gens and Envy's.

1021
00:51:53,760 --> 00:51:55,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, this is this is crazy.

1022
00:51:56,000 --> 00:51:58,920
Speaker 1: So we had op who In the beginning, you know,

1023
00:51:59,760 --> 00:52:02,239
Speaker 1: I was like, is he one of the is he

1024
00:52:02,280 --> 00:52:04,239
Speaker 1: one of the Manisphere guys that were one of his

1025
00:52:04,640 --> 00:52:07,400
Speaker 1: one of his one of his brosifs you know, hit

1026
00:52:07,480 --> 00:52:10,400
Speaker 1: him with a with an Andrew taitlink Hustler's University and

1027
00:52:10,400 --> 00:52:14,880
Speaker 1: then he's just going crazy. But it see, I feel

1028
00:52:14,880 --> 00:52:20,680
Speaker 1: like he had more suspicions than the context than he explained,

1029
00:52:20,760 --> 00:52:22,680
Speaker 1: or maybe it was just a feeling that he had

1030
00:52:22,719 --> 00:52:30,160
Speaker 1: but that he couldn't quite articulate. But because it is

1031
00:52:30,520 --> 00:52:33,680
Speaker 1: kind of interesting to me that he suspected it even

1032
00:52:33,719 --> 00:52:37,120
Speaker 1: though the son was actually related to him or the

1033
00:52:37,160 --> 00:52:40,960
Speaker 1: baby can't remember the gender was related to him, so

1034
00:52:41,640 --> 00:52:43,520
Speaker 1: low key impressive that I feel like I feel like

1035
00:52:43,520 --> 00:52:44,600
Speaker 1: I would never be able.

1036
00:52:44,520 --> 00:52:46,480
Speaker 2: To tell my God.

1037
00:52:46,640 --> 00:52:51,439
Speaker 1: And then how on earth, how on the universe could

1038
00:52:51,600 --> 00:52:55,399
Speaker 1: the father uh OHP's father and Opie's wife think that

1039
00:52:55,400 --> 00:53:00,600
Speaker 1: that was possibly? I mean, yes, you might tnically like

1040
00:53:00,719 --> 00:53:03,920
Speaker 1: have him you know, blue pill or whatever, and like

1041
00:53:04,160 --> 00:53:06,200
Speaker 1: his whole life, he's just like, Okay, here's my daughter,

1042
00:53:06,239 --> 00:53:09,000
Speaker 1: here's my wife, I have my family, things are together,

1043
00:53:09,280 --> 00:53:13,320
Speaker 1: blah blah blah blah. But it's a lie, and doesn't

1044
00:53:13,360 --> 00:53:17,000
Speaker 1: he deserve to know the truth. And Opie's wife like

1045
00:53:17,120 --> 00:53:21,360
Speaker 1: living with that is is crazy. Opie's father, you know,

1046
00:53:21,520 --> 00:53:28,200
Speaker 1: passing away and not saying anything, holy moley, good gravy, golly. Well,

1047
00:53:28,280 --> 00:53:31,520
Speaker 1: if if let me guys you know your thoughts down below, please,

1048
00:53:31,560 --> 00:53:35,279
Speaker 1: I would love to hear your perspective and any of

1049
00:53:35,320 --> 00:53:41,040
Speaker 1: your craziest cheating stories, cheated cheated on or you know what,

1050
00:53:41,120 --> 00:53:44,239
Speaker 1: maybe you did a little dart yourself. Feel free to

1051
00:53:44,239 --> 00:53:47,960
Speaker 1: throw those stories in the comments below. A craziest cheating story.

1052
00:53:48,520 --> 00:53:52,400
Speaker 1: My guys, I'm gonna I'm gonna need some of this,

1053
00:53:52,640 --> 00:53:55,160
Speaker 1: some of this agua. But let me, let me chug this,

1054
00:53:56,000 --> 00:54:00,359
Speaker 1: drown myself and Idris and we'll get into there's the

1055
00:54:00,400 --> 00:54:00,919
Speaker 1: next one.