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Speaker 1: Hi, I'm Chelsea Handler. Welcome to Life Will Be the

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Speaker 1: Death of Me production of I Heart Radio. You may

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Speaker 1: know me from my shows, my TV shows Chelsea on

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Speaker 1: Netflix or Chelsea Lately, or Chelsea Does Series on Netflix,

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Speaker 1: or any of my books. I am doing a limited

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Speaker 1: series podcast to go hand in hand with my sit

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Speaker 1: down comedy tour about my book called Life Will Be

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Speaker 1: the Death of Me. I wrote a book about me

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Speaker 1: seeing a psychiatrist for the first real time in my

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Speaker 1: life and getting real about childhood, trauma, loss, grief, all

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Speaker 1: of the things that none of us ever really want

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Speaker 1: to deal with. I dealt with him at forty two

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Speaker 1: and still dealing with them now. But I have to

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Speaker 1: say I feel a lot better, a lot more grounded,

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Speaker 1: and a lot happier. So I just kind of want

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Speaker 1: to take everybody through my journey of taking this book

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Speaker 1: on the road, of talking to all the different people

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Speaker 1: on the road who are going to interview me in

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Speaker 1: different cities. Jake Tapper's in d C. I have Annie

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Speaker 1: Britten in Austin and Dallas, and I have Natasha Leone

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Speaker 1: in New York. I have all sorts of fun people,

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Speaker 1: and I also have my psychiatrist, Dan Siegel, who will

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Speaker 1: be coming on to talk with me about me, my

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Speaker 1: problems and potentially you and yours and how we can

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Speaker 1: all kind of get better at being people. And my

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Speaker 1: bff Mary McCormick, who you may recognize her from The

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Speaker 1: West Wing or from In Plain Sight, a show she

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Speaker 1: was on for many years and most recently on The

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Speaker 1: Kids Are All Right on ABC. She lives ten minutes

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Speaker 1: away from me and has had to deal with my

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Speaker 1: behavior for the longest amount of time out of all

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Speaker 1: of my friends. So I will be starting the podcast

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Speaker 1: with her. She's my best friend and she knows all

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Speaker 1: the really embarrassing stuff that didn't make the book. Thank

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Speaker 1: you for joining us today. It sounds so I feel

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Speaker 1: like a little bit um Oprah crossed with something else

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Speaker 1: that's with with Gail. And then here we are, and

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Speaker 1: we're sitting here with Brandon, who is my brand And

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Speaker 1: how would you describe your position with me? It's a

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Speaker 1: woman of the night. Yeah, I tell people were platonic

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Speaker 1: life partners. So we're basically, Yes, you're my assistant and

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Speaker 1: my decision maker, and I love that you've decided to

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Speaker 1: do your first podcast with your assistant. Well, he knows

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Speaker 1: the most about I love it. I just love it

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Speaker 1: because you admit that you don't do much without the

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Speaker 1: help from an assistant. But this is sort of I mean,

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Speaker 1: I love it. Yes, I actually think it's going to

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Speaker 1: be great because you're funny and smart and you do

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Speaker 1: know Chelsea sort of as well as anyone. But I

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Speaker 1: also think it's an incredible completion in your journey have

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Speaker 1: come full So just admitting that you don't want to

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Speaker 1: do anything without the help from many assistants. Right, So

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Speaker 1: it's it's basically like it's a three sixty because I

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Speaker 1: started out wanting to become more self sufficient, and in

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Speaker 1: that like year of therapy and self exploration, I realized

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Speaker 1: that it's is better for me to have an assistance.

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Speaker 1: It's overrated all that independence. Yes, it's best that Brandon

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Speaker 1: is a side was close to my son. I would

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Speaker 1: like him, Yes, So I decided that, you know, independence

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Speaker 1: is great if you've you know, but why push it? Well,

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Speaker 1: I pushed something when I'm not good at it, and

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Speaker 1: I have so many other strengths that I want to

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Speaker 1: focus on. Right, that's really smart. So Brandon, let me

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Speaker 1: take you back because I know you How long have

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Speaker 1: you been assisting me about three years. Almost three years, okay,

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Speaker 1: so that's not even that long. But before that he

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Speaker 1: worked on Chelsea Lately. Were you an intern? And then

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Speaker 1: when you asked him was well, I mean, I'm just

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Speaker 1: confirming the story that I've heard. So I don't know

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Speaker 1: if you know how I met Mary originally on the

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Speaker 1: show now, yeah, yeah, I interview on the show, and

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Speaker 1: then we went to some women's event the next night.

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Speaker 1: And we liked each other on the show because she

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Speaker 1: was bad mouthing her children and talking about how annoying

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Speaker 1: they were, and I was like, I can respect that.

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Speaker 1: And then we went to that. I forget what kind

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Speaker 1: of event it was, but it was for women about

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Speaker 1: women and how to be stronger. And it was way

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Speaker 1: before I had the luxury. I don't know how to

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Speaker 1: frame it. It was a time where I didn't take

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Speaker 1: the events like that as seriously as I should have.

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Speaker 1: I kind of was like, oh, god, women talking about

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Speaker 1: being powerful women. It's like, just go be a powerful woman.

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Speaker 1: Why do you have to talk about it all the time.

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Speaker 1: That was about ten years ago. So then she asked

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Speaker 1: me if I smoked, and I said sure, and she goes, oh,

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Speaker 1: let's go out and smoke a cigarette. I was like, okay, great,

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Speaker 1: we walked outside, I handed her cigarette goes oh, no,

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Speaker 1: I quit. I can't do it, but please just blow

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Speaker 1: the smoke into my face. No, I said, blown into

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Speaker 1: my tits? Why? And then it goes longer. I get

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Speaker 1: more of it. You're describing your tits as long right now. No,

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Speaker 1: I'm saying I get the smoke experience for a longer

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Speaker 1: period of time. Meaning if you aim at my face,

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Speaker 1: I always say aim at my boobe. But that is

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Speaker 1: how we became friends. I wanted to heal your second cigarette, right.

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Speaker 1: I think I made a comment about drinking and you

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Speaker 1: were like cheers to that, and we were both on

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Speaker 1: the same page with like having a good time and

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Speaker 1: not taking you know, Hollywood too seriously. This is a

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Speaker 1: relatively quick relationship. Yeah. I think we made a dinner

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Speaker 1: plan that week anyway, So the relationship started from there.

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Speaker 1: And I would like to introduce in order to get

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Speaker 1: a full landscape of our relationship because our lives are

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Speaker 1: very different. You're a mother of three, you're married, you

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Speaker 1: know you take your responsibilities seriously. Well, yes, you're right,

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Speaker 1: and Irish Catholic, you have a lot of like Catholic guilt.

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Speaker 1: You want to do you like to show up and

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Speaker 1: work hard and hustle and be a good person. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: those thank you. I mean I think that's a compliment.

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Speaker 1: I'm not sure in sound like, yes, those are true.

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Speaker 1: That's true for the most part. I don't always do that,

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Speaker 1: but that's my aim. Brandon, would you agree with Have

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Speaker 1: you noticed these things about Mary? And I've observed the

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Speaker 1: same things. Okay, great, I would say that these are

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Speaker 1: all the things that I would think of when I

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Speaker 1: think of you. That's nice. I sound pretty together. Yes,

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Speaker 1: So I'm not together. I don't have a lot of response.

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Speaker 1: I have responsible relities, but they're like man made or

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Speaker 1: you know, it's debatable what kind of responsibilities I have.

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Speaker 1: But I don't have children, and I like to get

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Speaker 1: up and you know, fly away and go on trips

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Speaker 1: and impromptu vacations and stuff. So I have a different lifestyle.

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Speaker 1: I think that's true. But I do think I mean,

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Speaker 1: I think some people have kids and they don't have

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Speaker 1: a lot of responsibilities. So I don't think that just

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Speaker 1: the having kids makes it meaning. I think you actually

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Speaker 1: do have a lot of responsibilities and you sort of

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Speaker 1: do show up a lot to things, and I mean,

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Speaker 1: you say you're gonna be there, you're there. You get

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Speaker 1: more done in one day than I do. Well, I

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Speaker 1: don't know if that's true, but I like to show

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Speaker 1: up when I say I'm gonna show up. We're both

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Speaker 1: like that. We don't like to blow things off. We're

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Speaker 1: not flaky. Neither one of us are like that. And

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Speaker 1: in this town that's good because you're although we should

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Speaker 1: be more flaky. I would argue if if I just

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Speaker 1: want to like, you know, I think you know what

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Speaker 1: I'm talking about, and I think I have to learn

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Speaker 1: a stronger lesson about not saying yes to people that

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Speaker 1: are not necessary to hang out with. I do that

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Speaker 1: work well, I would argue that you do it too

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Speaker 1: that I said for from that more. Yeah, it's people

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Speaker 1: people pleasing. Yes, I suffer from that. My friend Shawna

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Speaker 1: calls it the Mary McCormick disease because she thinks I will,

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Speaker 1: like I suffer from it and will never get over it.

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Speaker 1: This is what I call the Mary McCormick when I

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Speaker 1: if I ever see it again, I will call it that.

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Speaker 1: But I haven't because almost nobody in the world does.

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Speaker 1: It is She was at a party at a cocktail party,

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Speaker 1: sitting on a stool kind of like a bar stool,

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Speaker 1: talking to two men confidently and for a long time,

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Speaker 1: like very confidently. Legs like you know, in jeans, but

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Speaker 1: open like splayed like a guy like you do on

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Speaker 1: a stool, like a guy does on a stool. That's right, right,

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Speaker 1: Well we're guys basically. I mean, I would say I'm

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Speaker 1: more masculine than feminine, excluding these two juggernauts. Um, yes,

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Speaker 1: and do you want to finish this? Finish it? I

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Speaker 1: you know, I mean, I don't know that there's that

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Speaker 1: much relevance to this story. I don't know why. Well

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Speaker 1: I just call it a Mary McCormick. And I want

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Speaker 1: people to know because I'm because I made a fool

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Speaker 1: of myself. So I looked at after a long time

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Speaker 1: of chatting, I looked down and I saw my vagina.

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Speaker 1: My button on my jeans was still done, but the

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Speaker 1: actual zipper was down. So there was just a triangle

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Speaker 1: of vagina. Vagina, Yeah, people care, and also just vagina

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Speaker 1: fat like like a little you know, the flesh on

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Speaker 1: the vagina what I call the pincushion, you know what

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Speaker 1: I mean. So, and and it was made more like

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Speaker 1: pincushion sq because the jeans was forcing it, you know,

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Speaker 1: like it was almost poof out a bit. Yes, like

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Speaker 1: you would do something if you wanted something to be poofy.

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Speaker 1: I don't wear vagina was peacocket. I don't wear a

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Speaker 1: lot of underwear. That's correct. Yeah, yeah, she doesn't wear

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Speaker 1: a lot of underhere, she doesn't wear underwear. I underwear yesterday. Why,

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Speaker 1: I don't know. I think you get used to having

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Speaker 1: a thong up your house if you do it long

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Speaker 1: and right. That's like people who spin and they're like,

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Speaker 1: eventually you can't feel the pain in your vagina. Guess what.

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Speaker 1: I don't want to lose that pain. My other favorite

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Speaker 1: Mary McCormick story is when she was driving to Pasadena

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Speaker 1: and she carries a thermis with her, long before it

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Speaker 1: was cool or what was it cool? But I didn't

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Speaker 1: know they got cool. I like, I like a coffee thermis. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: and you were driving and you texted me a picture.

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Speaker 1: It wasn't a picture of what happened. But can you

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Speaker 1: take us through that story. I'm just doing this this

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Speaker 1: exposition because I want people to know the glue that

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Speaker 1: keeps us together? Is this the glue. Perhaps, Wow, I

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Speaker 1: didn't know it was that. I'm happy to share it.

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Speaker 1: It's I mean, it's it's I think you think this

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Speaker 1: is my most humiliating story. I don't think of it

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Speaker 1: that way, but I think of it as completely resourceful.

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Speaker 1: I'm proud of myself for how I handled it. I mean,

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Speaker 1: it's not ideal. I wouldn't want it to happen again.

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Speaker 1: I was driving and I was in traffic, but really

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Speaker 1: bad l a traffic whether I couldn't go left and

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Speaker 1: I couldn't go right. There was nowhere to turn, I

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Speaker 1: mean the cars in front of me and backwards, and

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Speaker 1: all of a sudden I had to go to the

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Speaker 1: bathroom and not number one. I had to shut I

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Speaker 1: should do be That's what I call it. Yeah, but

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Speaker 1: it was like my stemp for it to happen that quickly.

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Speaker 1: I was like, Oh, this could be anything. I mean,

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Speaker 1: I don't know what nature of shoudubi was going to

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Speaker 1: come out, because I just knew that something was about

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Speaker 1: to happen, either in my clothes or I guess, on

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Speaker 1: the side of the road. I mean, I was in

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Speaker 1: a full panic. I didn't know what to do. I

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Speaker 1: couldn't go anymore. I hope for you would be the

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Speaker 1: side of the road, but that would get arrested for that.

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Speaker 1: I mean, you can't just get out of your car.

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Speaker 1: And that's my hope for you. I would like to

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Speaker 1: see next time. I think we already gave the story

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Speaker 1: away by your leading. But luckily I had my thermos,

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Speaker 1: and I could see that if the car, if my

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Speaker 1: car could sort of inch up, even just two more feet,

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Speaker 1: there's an alley way I could get down. I couldn't

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Speaker 1: turn down a real there's no real streets, but I

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Speaker 1: could get down this alleyway. And so I managed to

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Speaker 1: do that, like I managed to sort of ride the

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Speaker 1: curb a little and get down this alleyway. And then

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Speaker 1: I pulled over, and I thought, what am I? I

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Speaker 1: have to ship? But if I get out and do

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Speaker 1: it in the alleyway, there's windows like business is looking

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Speaker 1: down onto the alleyway. I'm going to get in trouble.

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna get arrested or call it or and I

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Speaker 1: don't know how long it's going to take. I mean

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Speaker 1: I might be I might be squatting for I don't know.

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Speaker 1: And so I emptied my thermis out the car. Coffee

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Speaker 1: coffee out of the car, and I took the Luckily,

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Speaker 1: I have shopping bags in my car paper, you know,

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Speaker 1: grocery bags because your mom. Well, yeah, because you should too.

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Speaker 1: But anyway, and then I, well, Brandon does, I'm sure right,

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Speaker 1: So I put garbage bags on my seat, and then

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Speaker 1: I took the thermis and I'm doing a turning motion

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Speaker 1: with my hand because luckily, it's a very thin Japanese thermis,

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Speaker 1: and so the top is maybe like this, maybe an

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Speaker 1: inchure inch and a half two inches probably wide, and

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Speaker 1: I put it up to my butt, but like tight,

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Speaker 1: a tight fit, not quite in, but definitely in adjacent,

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Speaker 1: like really close to in, so that there could be

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Speaker 1: no accident. And then I pooped into my thermis and

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Speaker 1: then I screwed the top back on. I have wipes

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Speaker 1: in my car as well, because I'm a mom. I

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Speaker 1: always have wipes. And so really the whole thing was

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Speaker 1: as I mean, it was as if it never happened.

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Speaker 1: I it sounds like a very easy transition, I mean

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Speaker 1: I was the only hard part was getting in the

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Speaker 1: position to get the thermis is about you know, it's

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Speaker 1: tall and thin, So getting up enough in my car

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Speaker 1: to get the thermis under my bum but I could do.

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Speaker 1: I did it obviously, and then there was a dumpster

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Speaker 1: through the whole thing away thermis bags wipes. See, I

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Speaker 1: was if it never happened. Felt great. Yeah, I mean

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Speaker 1: it's almost like it's never happened. But I would feel

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Speaker 1: like it would be hard to place that into the area,

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Speaker 1: Like I wouldn't feel confident like this thermis right here,

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Speaker 1: the YETI with a big opening, then I would have

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Speaker 1: confidence that I would think, oh, I'm going to aim

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Speaker 1: in the wrong. I got it, I got it. Was

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Speaker 1: no aim, I'm not aiming. And that's tricky because you

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Speaker 1: didn't know what sort of situation is going to come

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Speaker 1: out of there. I had a sense that there was

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Speaker 1: not a full, big, solid action just based on my

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Speaker 1: how fastily I sensed that this might have a liquid

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Speaker 1: quality to it. I feel proud of my resourcefulness and

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Speaker 1: that my car has everything, and my car has everything

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Speaker 1: you need to survive, Yeah, it does. It's car. Yeah, Brandon,

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Speaker 1: you should have that in your car for me? Which

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Speaker 1: is my bag? I need? Yeah? I don't need snacks.

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Speaker 1: I should, like, you know, things that can save my life.

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Speaker 1: I think the question is is what do you do?

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Speaker 1: With the thermis. You know, throw it away? I know,

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Speaker 1: but I bet you there are some people that I

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Speaker 1: did love that thermis. It's a Japanese thermis. It's a

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Speaker 1: great one. But I threw it away. I have more.

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Speaker 1: It's a weird start to this. No it's not. I mean,

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Speaker 1: I just wonder why you find it, And then I think,

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Speaker 1: didn't I get a text from you this year saying

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Speaker 1: you also pooped in your thermis. No, I didn't poop.

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Speaker 1: I peed in my thermis. I was visiting my uncle

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Speaker 1: and I pulled over and I had to pee so badly,

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Speaker 1: and I just I had to pull over on a

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Speaker 1: very busy street actually and empty the thermis and then

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Speaker 1: get into my car put it. But the vagina, you know,

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Speaker 1: like that I know how to do. Also, was it this?

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Speaker 1: Because you know that's not a real thermist, that's this

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Speaker 1: is a yettie. This is for Yeah, this is not

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Speaker 1: to do. It's almost like a toilet. I mean, that's

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Speaker 1: not really a t I don't know if I could

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Speaker 1: get a smaller thing around my vagina either, I'm not

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Speaker 1: sure would be harder because the peeing gets a little

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Speaker 1: but harder than the butthole. This I aligned it quite.

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Speaker 1: It was a snug aligne matter. We got that loud

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Speaker 1: and clear through all three times. She's taking a sip

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Speaker 1: out of it now anyway, Uh, Mary and my friendship

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Speaker 1: has lasted a how long have we been friends since

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Speaker 1: Rosie was a little girl? Like probably six months after

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Speaker 1: Rosie was born, which is probably one of my longest

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Speaker 1: last relationships actually longer. So yeah. So and Brandon, um,

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Speaker 1: you haven't been here the whole relationship time, but Mary has.

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Speaker 1: And so you've seen me go through a lot of

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Speaker 1: different phases as I've seen you go through well less

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Speaker 1: probably I haven't seen you go through many phases. I

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Speaker 1: would say different work experiences, but I mean like, um,

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Speaker 1: you know emotional or therapy phases you have. I started

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Speaker 1: going into therapy. Well yeah, I mean yeah, you went

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Speaker 1: yeah absolutely and started meditating and you know, yeah, you

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Speaker 1: were the one you started doing t M and then

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Speaker 1: you said it really helped you. I love it, and

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Speaker 1: I yeah, and I do. You still do it every

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Speaker 1: day although my sometimes my second meditation is like right

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Speaker 1: before bed um, and when you did that, like I

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Speaker 1: remember we would be in the Bahamas and you guys

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Speaker 1: were meditating and you go over on a hammock and

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Speaker 1: come back and say, oh my gosh, I fell asleep meditating,

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Speaker 1: And I'm like, what the fund is that? Like, how

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Speaker 1: could you get so relaxed in the middle of the day.

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Speaker 1: I had no understanding of it. I knew that people

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Speaker 1: liked it, Brandon, do you meditate? No? I try. I

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Speaker 1: can't get into it. I can't stay relaxed long enough. Right,

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Speaker 1: have you tried smoking pot? And meditating kind of defeats

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Speaker 1: the purpose, but it's a good gameway drug to get

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Speaker 1: you there. Yeah, And I did it for about ten

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Speaker 1: minutes that time, and I forgot what I was doing,

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Speaker 1: So I don't know if it really worked out. I

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Speaker 1: think forgetting what you're doing is great, but I don't know.

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Speaker 1: That was just suddenly on the floor and I'm like,

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Speaker 1: what am I doing down here? I couldn't remember why

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Speaker 1: had braced myself. So when I decided that, oh, I

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Speaker 1: didn't think. I didn't take your meditation, like I didn't

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Speaker 1: want to meditate myself, Like I never had that desire. No,

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Speaker 1: you had a little disdain, Yeah, well yeah, yeah, a

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00:16:10,440 --> 00:16:14,600
Speaker 1: little disdain sure, definitely, Like I was happy, but I

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00:16:14,640 --> 00:16:17,280
Speaker 1: don't think you really like I didn't Yeah, I didn't

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Speaker 1: think I could. I thought it was good for a

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Speaker 1: lot of people, but I wouldn't get anything out of it.

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Speaker 1: But it's also you get this very judgmental um feeling,

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Speaker 1: at least for me, about people who went to therapy.

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Speaker 1: Because I was in this town. It's a lot of

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Speaker 1: I coupled that with colonics and cleanses and kale and

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Speaker 1: you know to what I realized is you can go

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Speaker 1: to therapy and still take a run, right right, Like

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Speaker 1: it was no shame in just saying I need some help. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: So now I'm meditating every morning, you're meditating, and Brandon

348
00:16:47,240 --> 00:16:49,920
Speaker 1: you're just masturbating before you go getting and finding himself

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Speaker 1: on the floor apparently. But tonight I'm going to go

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Speaker 1: home and go into meditating. Well yeah, you know, I mean,

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00:16:55,080 --> 00:16:57,480
Speaker 1: don't feel peer pressure. I mean, this is one of

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Speaker 1: the This is a conversation a that I never thought

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Speaker 1: I would be sitting around having. I copy that. Yeah, right,

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Speaker 1: I mean talking about meditating and we have I mean

355
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Speaker 1: we are almost in our fifties. You already are fifty.

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Speaker 1: I don't need to I'm forty four. Just for the record,

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Speaker 1: I just want to want to know what's what the

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Speaker 1: deal is here because sometimes Mary gets confused and groups

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Speaker 1: us together. It's true, but then it's always comforting when

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Speaker 1: people come up and say she looks older. Yeah, I

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00:17:22,960 --> 00:17:24,760
Speaker 1: mean people will always say that about me, and I

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Speaker 1: think it's because I'm so mature. Getting back into the

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Speaker 1: friendship kind of where it started. Did you know right

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Speaker 1: away that it wasn't going to be just a Hollywood

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Speaker 1: friendship that was gonna last you know, a few like

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Speaker 1: dinner dates and then taper off. No, because you don't

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Speaker 1: know that you know, no, but I mean you do. Yeah, No,

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Speaker 1: I mean because in this time you meet people all

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Speaker 1: the time, and like sometimes you know, a first impression

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Speaker 1: is a great impression, and then it's the wrong impression,

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00:17:49,000 --> 00:17:51,360
Speaker 1: and sometimes people are slower burned. I mean, we were

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Speaker 1: instant friends, but we we were just like, you know,

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Speaker 1: very similar. It could have got either way, that's true.

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Speaker 1: But this friendship seems different than friendships that you have

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Speaker 1: with anyone else, Like you two together, and why do

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00:18:03,840 --> 00:18:06,000
Speaker 1: you think that is? Like? What is it that Mary

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00:18:06,080 --> 00:18:09,760
Speaker 1: does for you that her relationship has endured when others haven't.

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00:18:10,000 --> 00:18:13,000
Speaker 1: What's your opinion of our relationship? Before I answer questions,

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00:18:13,040 --> 00:18:15,360
Speaker 1: you've seen us like you've seen the dynamic of our

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Speaker 1: relationship and we've been friends for like eleven plus years

381
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Speaker 1: and change. I think Mary is kind of the way

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Speaker 1: you describe what you want in a man that I

383
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Speaker 1: think that she now I do like I Mary is

384
00:18:30,280 --> 00:18:31,919
Speaker 1: has like an authority to her, and I think she

385
00:18:31,960 --> 00:18:33,600
Speaker 1: puts you in your place when you need it. I

386
00:18:33,600 --> 00:18:36,280
Speaker 1: think like she tells you the truth, even if it's

387
00:18:36,359 --> 00:18:40,520
Speaker 1: not going to benefit her, Like she's that honest friend

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Speaker 1: that you have that you can go to know you're

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00:18:42,080 --> 00:18:43,920
Speaker 1: going to get a really answer. So if she thinks

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00:18:44,400 --> 00:18:46,359
Speaker 1: you know, what you're doing is garbage, but everyone else

391
00:18:46,440 --> 00:18:48,080
Speaker 1: is telling you it's great, you know you can rely

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Speaker 1: on that. Yeah, I would say most of the time

393
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Speaker 1: you tell me the truth. I think you try to

394
00:18:52,720 --> 00:18:56,119
Speaker 1: spare my feelings sometimes, though, like I probably wouldn't know

395
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Speaker 1: the best way to go about getting the truth, asking

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Speaker 1: in a way that I think that would indicate that

397
00:19:02,040 --> 00:19:04,600
Speaker 1: I don't care about the answer. Maybe it depends on

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00:19:04,640 --> 00:19:06,320
Speaker 1: the issue. I mean, I think there have been times

399
00:19:06,320 --> 00:19:09,960
Speaker 1: where big things have happened where I say that was unacceptable,

400
00:19:10,040 --> 00:19:12,520
Speaker 1: unacceptable When I made our friend cry at dinner one

401
00:19:12,640 --> 00:19:15,680
Speaker 1: night we were at a restaurant in l A and

402
00:19:15,880 --> 00:19:18,200
Speaker 1: we went out to dinner. There was four of us. Yeah,

403
00:19:18,280 --> 00:19:21,320
Speaker 1: it was just I mean, it was just completely unnecessary. Yeah.

404
00:19:21,520 --> 00:19:23,119
Speaker 1: I was really pissed at my friend and I just

405
00:19:23,200 --> 00:19:25,160
Speaker 1: kind of went off on her and she just sat

406
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Speaker 1: there crying, and then I left in a restaurant though,

407
00:19:27,480 --> 00:19:29,000
Speaker 1: where we knew tons of I was like, you could

408
00:19:29,040 --> 00:19:31,520
Speaker 1: have just done that in a healthier way tomorrow, you know.

409
00:19:31,520 --> 00:19:33,680
Speaker 1: So I mean I think, like, look, I do think

410
00:19:33,960 --> 00:19:36,000
Speaker 1: we both sort of honor each other with the truth.

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Speaker 1: I mean that there's been times where I hurt your

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Speaker 1: feelings and she says it, which I value. And you know,

413
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Speaker 1: I have very few friends who do that. I mean,

414
00:19:43,200 --> 00:19:45,600
Speaker 1: I have a handful of friends who say, hey, you know,

415
00:19:45,640 --> 00:19:48,600
Speaker 1: when you did that thing, it sort of sucks, it

416
00:19:48,680 --> 00:19:51,080
Speaker 1: sort of actually hurts my feelings, and I value it,

417
00:19:51,119 --> 00:19:52,480
Speaker 1: even though it's hard to hear in the moment. I

418
00:19:52,520 --> 00:19:55,840
Speaker 1: do value it because it means at least your friendship

419
00:19:55,880 --> 00:19:57,720
Speaker 1: is worth that you know that they're not lying to

420
00:19:57,760 --> 00:20:00,560
Speaker 1: you and building a presentment. And so I think we

421
00:20:00,680 --> 00:20:03,040
Speaker 1: do that pretty well. I mean, I think we've gotten

422
00:20:03,040 --> 00:20:05,280
Speaker 1: pretty good at that over the years. Well, okay, so

423
00:20:05,320 --> 00:20:07,479
Speaker 1: looking back at that instance in the restaurant, would you

424
00:20:08,160 --> 00:20:11,240
Speaker 1: like pre therapy and post therapy? That was pretty therapy?

425
00:20:11,359 --> 00:20:13,199
Speaker 1: In fact, I would say that was probably one of

426
00:20:13,240 --> 00:20:18,240
Speaker 1: the That time period was a pretty angry time period

427
00:20:18,320 --> 00:20:21,520
Speaker 1: for you. Fair. I'm trying to think what period of

428
00:20:21,520 --> 00:20:23,320
Speaker 1: time in my life it was, but I'm sure you're right.

429
00:20:23,880 --> 00:20:28,160
Speaker 1: I think it was right before you decided to leave. Yeah,

430
00:20:28,200 --> 00:20:30,880
Speaker 1: And I was you know, done before it was over. Yes.

431
00:20:31,040 --> 00:20:33,080
Speaker 1: And when you look back on that instance, do you

432
00:20:33,119 --> 00:20:35,240
Speaker 1: think that there are things that you like now, the

433
00:20:35,280 --> 00:20:37,639
Speaker 1: tools that you've learned in therapy that you would have

434
00:20:37,640 --> 00:20:40,440
Speaker 1: been able to apply or would you still just to

435
00:20:40,520 --> 00:20:43,439
Speaker 1: do that now? No, I'm not emotional now like in

436
00:20:43,480 --> 00:20:45,120
Speaker 1: that way. I think one of the things with therapies

437
00:20:45,240 --> 00:20:47,399
Speaker 1: you learn all these lessons, they give you all the tools,

438
00:20:47,400 --> 00:20:49,240
Speaker 1: but then to actually apply them as a lot harder.

439
00:20:49,680 --> 00:20:51,480
Speaker 1: Then you go out and get into a fucking screaming

440
00:20:51,480 --> 00:20:53,680
Speaker 1: match with a parking lot attendant after you've been meditating

441
00:20:53,680 --> 00:20:56,040
Speaker 1: for thirty minutes. Well, you're not going to be perfect,

442
00:20:56,520 --> 00:20:58,359
Speaker 1: you know. I mean, it's not. I don't think meditation

443
00:20:58,520 --> 00:21:00,680
Speaker 1: or any of that. Stoor therapy makes you heal. That

444
00:21:00,800 --> 00:21:03,680
Speaker 1: just makes you able to at least acknowledge what's going

445
00:21:03,680 --> 00:21:06,040
Speaker 1: on now. You're a big believer in therapy, and when

446
00:21:06,040 --> 00:21:09,000
Speaker 1: she wanted to get into it, did you like what, no,

447
00:21:09,200 --> 00:21:11,480
Speaker 1: what do you think? I'm was thrilled, but you sort

448
00:21:11,480 --> 00:21:14,000
Speaker 1: of snuck into it, like she even she was sort

449
00:21:14,000 --> 00:21:16,200
Speaker 1: of like one of those people who gets sober but

450
00:21:16,280 --> 00:21:18,199
Speaker 1: doesn't say I'm sober now. They just are like, I'm

451
00:21:18,240 --> 00:21:20,080
Speaker 1: not drinking this month, and then it's two months, and

452
00:21:20,080 --> 00:21:22,359
Speaker 1: then it's six months. And I mean, I think you

453
00:21:22,400 --> 00:21:24,800
Speaker 1: sort of approached your therapy the same way, like because

454
00:21:24,800 --> 00:21:27,119
Speaker 1: she said that she liked the way Dan explain things

455
00:21:27,520 --> 00:21:30,199
Speaker 1: and Dan Segel, who is your what will we call

456
00:21:30,280 --> 00:21:34,440
Speaker 1: him your psychiatrist? Psychiatrist? He is very scientific with the

457
00:21:34,440 --> 00:21:37,199
Speaker 1: way he delivers information. But then months earlier you'd gone

458
00:21:37,240 --> 00:21:39,280
Speaker 1: to a hypnotist to quit smoking. So that's like a

459
00:21:39,320 --> 00:21:43,280
Speaker 1: huge juxtaposition between I want somebody, I think that is

460
00:21:43,320 --> 00:21:47,919
Speaker 1: I think that's scientific, seems very l A like very

461
00:21:48,000 --> 00:21:49,520
Speaker 1: I think there's a ton of people in l A

462
00:21:49,560 --> 00:21:53,000
Speaker 1: who probably are not actual hypnotherapists, who who you know,

463
00:21:53,160 --> 00:21:56,120
Speaker 1: it won't work, but that is in I mean, lots

464
00:21:56,119 --> 00:21:58,960
Speaker 1: of people are changed their behavior based on HYPNOTHERPI I'll

465
00:21:59,160 --> 00:22:01,959
Speaker 1: carry gainer who was or hypnotists. We've sent other family

466
00:22:02,000 --> 00:22:04,600
Speaker 1: members there to quit smoking and they all stick with it.

467
00:22:04,680 --> 00:22:06,680
Speaker 1: So whatever he's doing works. But to me it seems

468
00:22:06,680 --> 00:22:09,080
Speaker 1: like wacky that, like I'm going to go to a

469
00:22:09,119 --> 00:22:13,240
Speaker 1: hypnotist for this, but it's not like getting exactly. She

470
00:22:13,240 --> 00:22:16,320
Speaker 1: didn't go like find out what her aura palette is

471
00:22:16,440 --> 00:22:22,119
Speaker 1: she at home palette because I don't want to do

472
00:22:22,280 --> 00:22:25,840
Speaker 1: she got it done on the Netflix show by Megan Fox.

473
00:22:26,359 --> 00:22:28,399
Speaker 1: They did something with her aura. Do you remember I

474
00:22:28,480 --> 00:22:30,440
Speaker 1: have to dig that out of the garage. Le let's

475
00:22:30,480 --> 00:22:33,840
Speaker 1: rewatch that episode together when we get home today. Would

476
00:22:33,880 --> 00:22:36,280
Speaker 1: you say, in your estimation since this year I just

477
00:22:36,320 --> 00:22:39,840
Speaker 1: tried to put aside for myself and self awareness and betterment,

478
00:22:40,240 --> 00:22:43,080
Speaker 1: do you think that I've become better or less dependent

479
00:22:43,280 --> 00:22:47,560
Speaker 1: on you? Definitely? I think that you have become more independent,

480
00:22:47,680 --> 00:22:49,879
Speaker 1: less dependent on me in a lot of ways. But

481
00:22:50,000 --> 00:22:51,640
Speaker 1: for me it was always like I would tell you,

482
00:22:51,800 --> 00:22:53,240
Speaker 1: and I think sometimes I would tell you in times

483
00:22:53,240 --> 00:22:55,160
Speaker 1: where you were already frustrated, so it's hard to hear.

484
00:22:55,560 --> 00:22:58,159
Speaker 1: But there's a difference in wanting to do something and

485
00:22:58,200 --> 00:23:01,640
Speaker 1: being able to do something. And for me, like when

486
00:23:01,680 --> 00:23:04,600
Speaker 1: I'm gone when I'm no longer your assistant. I want

487
00:23:04,600 --> 00:23:06,520
Speaker 1: you to be able to do them like you should

488
00:23:06,520 --> 00:23:09,000
Speaker 1: know how to do things, even if you don't mind

489
00:23:09,080 --> 00:23:12,280
Speaker 1: up another person. Just let's be reasonable, I know, honestly,

490
00:23:12,280 --> 00:23:14,760
Speaker 1: like you think after I'm done with well, that's not

491
00:23:14,800 --> 00:23:18,320
Speaker 1: a good way acast. I thought you said we were

492
00:23:18,320 --> 00:23:23,000
Speaker 1: getting married. This is my two weeks notice. I thought

493
00:23:23,000 --> 00:23:24,720
Speaker 1: you said you wanted to be married. We are. We're

494
00:23:24,720 --> 00:23:26,240
Speaker 1: going to be like Craig and Ellen. So what are

495
00:23:26,280 --> 00:23:28,560
Speaker 1: you talking about to move on? I thought, I'm just

496
00:23:28,600 --> 00:23:32,040
Speaker 1: saying when we get married and we find an assistant

497
00:23:32,040 --> 00:23:35,879
Speaker 1: to support both of us. Um. But that's why I

498
00:23:35,920 --> 00:23:37,320
Speaker 1: think the difference is. And I think that you've been

499
00:23:37,359 --> 00:23:39,320
Speaker 1: more willing to try and do things yourself, which is

500
00:23:39,520 --> 00:23:41,160
Speaker 1: a lot of people won't do. So I think that's

501
00:23:41,640 --> 00:23:44,040
Speaker 1: really positive. Okay, we're gonna take a quick break and

502
00:23:44,080 --> 00:23:51,520
Speaker 1: we'll be right back. So do you think post Chelsea

503
00:23:51,800 --> 00:23:53,720
Speaker 1: you would be worried less? Like if that were true

504
00:23:53,840 --> 00:23:58,440
Speaker 1: what she said, I mean post therapy, Yeah, for sure,

505
00:23:58,720 --> 00:24:02,480
Speaker 1: because there's a gentler reaction to everything. You know, she's

506
00:24:02,680 --> 00:24:04,200
Speaker 1: she's what do you see it in the most? Do

507
00:24:04,200 --> 00:24:07,719
Speaker 1: you think with the way she responds, Now, I just

508
00:24:07,760 --> 00:24:11,720
Speaker 1: think I see it even in UM. I mean, she's

509
00:24:11,720 --> 00:24:15,080
Speaker 1: always been inquisitive, like meeting people and stuff, but she

510
00:24:15,240 --> 00:24:19,280
Speaker 1: also has a Sometimes if someone says something stupid or

511
00:24:19,680 --> 00:24:21,520
Speaker 1: is just a little bit boring, she used to just

512
00:24:21,600 --> 00:24:23,600
Speaker 1: be like I could see her glaze over, and then

513
00:24:23,640 --> 00:24:25,320
Speaker 1: I'd be like, we should go because it's going to

514
00:24:25,440 --> 00:24:27,879
Speaker 1: get soon. She'll just stay to their face like are

515
00:24:27,880 --> 00:24:30,639
Speaker 1: you serious for that story? Like she would really, and

516
00:24:30,680 --> 00:24:33,000
Speaker 1: then we'd have like an awkward exit where I'm going, hey,

517
00:24:33,040 --> 00:24:35,160
Speaker 1: it's okay, Like behind her, she's already in the car

518
00:24:35,240 --> 00:24:39,280
Speaker 1: going Mary in the car yelling at me because I'm

519
00:24:39,320 --> 00:24:43,320
Speaker 1: inside doing the apology tour, so that I'm less on

520
00:24:43,359 --> 00:24:45,160
Speaker 1: the Apology to That's what we should call my book,

521
00:24:45,160 --> 00:24:49,080
Speaker 1: to the Apology to our great idea. I'm sorry everyone.

522
00:24:49,160 --> 00:24:51,400
Speaker 1: That's when this whole podcast should be called the Apology.

523
00:24:51,400 --> 00:24:53,199
Speaker 1: It should be called with the Orange because of the

524
00:24:53,200 --> 00:24:54,800
Speaker 1: Orange team of the book. Aren't you glad I went

525
00:24:54,840 --> 00:25:00,720
Speaker 1: to therapy? That would be not that, But I am

526
00:25:00,760 --> 00:25:02,639
Speaker 1: really glad you're into therapy because I did do a

527
00:25:02,640 --> 00:25:06,320
Speaker 1: lot of you know, in fairness to her and asked

528
00:25:06,320 --> 00:25:09,160
Speaker 1: me to do it, And maybe that's my own codependent craziness,

529
00:25:09,240 --> 00:25:11,879
Speaker 1: wanting to be like disease. I don't know, but I

530
00:25:11,920 --> 00:25:15,639
Speaker 1: did often do like a clean up before I would

531
00:25:15,680 --> 00:25:18,640
Speaker 1: then get in the car. Do you do you think

532
00:25:18,680 --> 00:25:20,520
Speaker 1: that there's a way that you have responded best to

533
00:25:20,560 --> 00:25:22,000
Speaker 1: therapy that you're like, Okay, now I can deal with

534
00:25:22,000 --> 00:25:25,160
Speaker 1: annoying people more or yeah, I mean that's been made

535
00:25:25,240 --> 00:25:27,440
Speaker 1: much more patient. You're kinder. I mean, I have to

536
00:25:27,440 --> 00:25:30,160
Speaker 1: say I think it comes from an increased empathy level.

537
00:25:30,160 --> 00:25:31,840
Speaker 1: I'm sure, which you can call it whatever you want,

538
00:25:31,840 --> 00:25:33,680
Speaker 1: but it's a kinder person. It's a kind of it's

539
00:25:33,680 --> 00:25:37,120
Speaker 1: a more patient person. Right, So if someone is bombing

540
00:25:37,160 --> 00:25:39,280
Speaker 1: on a story or a joke or not that you were,

541
00:25:40,080 --> 00:25:41,920
Speaker 1: I mean you just have it. You had to cut

542
00:25:41,920 --> 00:25:44,959
Speaker 1: off switch like it would get annoyed real quick and

543
00:25:45,000 --> 00:25:47,280
Speaker 1: then and then not be able to hide it, right,

544
00:25:47,320 --> 00:25:49,399
Speaker 1: And now she has a much more you laugh at

545
00:25:49,480 --> 00:25:52,840
Speaker 1: jokes that are like you're just it's a sweeter amston

546
00:25:53,000 --> 00:25:57,240
Speaker 1: a lot, yes, and that helps. I mean I actually

547
00:25:57,240 --> 00:26:01,840
Speaker 1: think that whatever that chemistry is probably should be working

548
00:26:01,840 --> 00:26:05,000
Speaker 1: for a ton of people. You know, don't use cannabis

549
00:26:05,040 --> 00:26:08,280
Speaker 1: right now, because I don't I lose my mind, like

550
00:26:08,359 --> 00:26:11,000
Speaker 1: it's not fun for me. It's just scary. But I'm not.

551
00:26:12,320 --> 00:26:15,320
Speaker 1: She can't smoke up. She can't. I really think I'm dying.

552
00:26:15,520 --> 00:26:17,520
Speaker 1: I think like it's not I think that's just not

553
00:26:17,560 --> 00:26:21,240
Speaker 1: the right mix. Then, like she's fine with the way

554
00:26:21,280 --> 00:26:23,600
Speaker 1: she is. She doesn't need it. I needed it to

555
00:26:23,640 --> 00:26:26,720
Speaker 1: cut my reaction time, you know what I mean, or

556
00:26:26,800 --> 00:26:30,120
Speaker 1: ad reaction time. I do think it adds. I mean,

557
00:26:30,160 --> 00:26:31,760
Speaker 1: I do think it's a love drug. It's a nice

558
00:26:31,880 --> 00:26:34,640
Speaker 1: it's you know, people on pot aren't beating each other up,

559
00:26:34,680 --> 00:26:38,080
Speaker 1: They're they're kinder to each other. So I think in

560
00:26:38,119 --> 00:26:41,720
Speaker 1: that respect, I'm all for it. Okay, So oh, I

561
00:26:41,800 --> 00:26:45,760
Speaker 1: have an idea. Let's talk about where we started when

562
00:26:45,760 --> 00:26:47,959
Speaker 1: when I started writing this book, where you and I,

563
00:26:48,080 --> 00:26:50,520
Speaker 1: where we started after the election, to where we are now.

564
00:26:50,840 --> 00:26:53,880
Speaker 1: Let's talk about that, and Brandon feel free to chime in.

565
00:26:54,880 --> 00:26:56,840
Speaker 1: Do you want to start? Well, I mean we could

566
00:26:56,840 --> 00:26:59,399
Speaker 1: start by just saying that we had different expectations of

567
00:26:59,480 --> 00:27:02,760
Speaker 1: the election. Yeah, okay, I was sure Trump was going

568
00:27:02,840 --> 00:27:05,119
Speaker 1: to win and I was sure that he was not.

569
00:27:06,040 --> 00:27:09,400
Speaker 1: And you watched at my house with all my girls

570
00:27:09,440 --> 00:27:11,639
Speaker 1: and we had champagne on because I was hoping I

571
00:27:11,680 --> 00:27:15,119
Speaker 1: was wrong, champagne and tears we had before the tears,

572
00:27:15,200 --> 00:27:17,919
Speaker 1: we were all it was a long night, and we

573
00:27:17,960 --> 00:27:20,040
Speaker 1: had a lot of women or not. I think my

574
00:27:20,119 --> 00:27:23,240
Speaker 1: sister had flown in and maybe my mom. No, not

575
00:27:23,320 --> 00:27:24,840
Speaker 1: my mom, but anyway, there was a bunch of women

576
00:27:24,880 --> 00:27:27,359
Speaker 1: and three little girls who had campaigned for her and stuff.

577
00:27:27,359 --> 00:27:29,880
Speaker 1: So it was a pretty painful night, I mean for everybody,

578
00:27:29,880 --> 00:27:31,960
Speaker 1: but in our house, particularly painful because then I had

579
00:27:31,960 --> 00:27:34,680
Speaker 1: to try to explain to them that we just elected

580
00:27:34,680 --> 00:27:37,080
Speaker 1: a known sexual assaulter and how to make sense of that.

581
00:27:38,480 --> 00:27:40,960
Speaker 1: You know. It was awful that night, wasn't it. Yeah,

582
00:27:40,960 --> 00:27:43,320
Speaker 1: it was really bleak. It was done for days after.

583
00:27:43,440 --> 00:27:46,520
Speaker 1: I think there was a real shock and a lot

584
00:27:46,520 --> 00:27:49,800
Speaker 1: of crying, and and then I think something happened with you,

585
00:27:49,920 --> 00:27:52,240
Speaker 1: which was really great. I'm going to take a hit

586
00:27:52,320 --> 00:27:55,000
Speaker 1: off my babe, pen that's great. But I do think

587
00:27:55,040 --> 00:27:57,760
Speaker 1: what was great about that time is that you, I mean,

588
00:27:57,800 --> 00:27:59,960
Speaker 1: instead of just at first we had like a little

589
00:28:00,040 --> 00:28:01,760
Speaker 1: morning period, and then I think you just saw it

590
00:28:01,800 --> 00:28:04,159
Speaker 1: as a chance to be part of the solution and

591
00:28:04,200 --> 00:28:06,520
Speaker 1: not comment on it from the sidelines like your show

592
00:28:06,600 --> 00:28:08,960
Speaker 1: had been for years. That it's commentary, right, it's like

593
00:28:08,960 --> 00:28:11,239
Speaker 1: your point of view about things that are happening, and

594
00:28:11,280 --> 00:28:13,160
Speaker 1: for the first time I thought, I think you sort

595
00:28:13,200 --> 00:28:14,760
Speaker 1: of were like, well, maybe I can be part of

596
00:28:14,760 --> 00:28:17,840
Speaker 1: the thing that's actually happening, the solution. And when you

597
00:28:17,880 --> 00:28:21,480
Speaker 1: started going to colleges I think and talking to young

598
00:28:21,520 --> 00:28:24,400
Speaker 1: people and yeah that I think that was really meaningful

599
00:28:24,480 --> 00:28:28,239
Speaker 1: for you. Well college, it was meaningful for me, I

600
00:28:28,280 --> 00:28:30,400
Speaker 1: think also because I had to figure out a way

601
00:28:30,440 --> 00:28:33,639
Speaker 1: to talk to conservatives without screaming, which was my only

602
00:28:33,640 --> 00:28:36,520
Speaker 1: way to communicate for so long. So I had to

603
00:28:36,560 --> 00:28:39,120
Speaker 1: figure out how to have discourse that was effective instead

604
00:28:39,160 --> 00:28:41,840
Speaker 1: of just being at a ten and outraged because I

605
00:28:41,880 --> 00:28:44,560
Speaker 1: realized you're not getting anybody to listen to you in

606
00:28:44,600 --> 00:28:47,720
Speaker 1: that way. That's why I think it linked nicely with

607
00:28:47,760 --> 00:28:52,680
Speaker 1: the therapy. You know, the timing was appropriate, yes, because

608
00:28:52,720 --> 00:28:54,960
Speaker 1: that was my initial thing to go into therapy was

609
00:28:55,000 --> 00:28:58,040
Speaker 1: how do I learn to not be so you know,

610
00:28:58,960 --> 00:29:02,800
Speaker 1: not to be so out about my anger and my outrage. Yeah,

611
00:29:02,520 --> 00:29:04,360
Speaker 1: and I think that part of that was Trump. And

612
00:29:04,400 --> 00:29:07,720
Speaker 1: also at the time, I remember before therapy, you had

613
00:29:07,720 --> 00:29:10,320
Speaker 1: expressed to me like, am I just hated am I?

614
00:29:10,480 --> 00:29:13,680
Speaker 1: You know, like you had had arguments with more than

615
00:29:13,720 --> 00:29:16,560
Speaker 1: one a few people, right, and you had had sort

616
00:29:16,560 --> 00:29:18,840
Speaker 1: of like or not arguments, but you were just like,

617
00:29:18,880 --> 00:29:21,280
Speaker 1: oh I felt that person to do this, or you

618
00:29:21,280 --> 00:29:26,480
Speaker 1: were really concerned about my image. Yeah. I remember we

619
00:29:26,520 --> 00:29:28,800
Speaker 1: had that one conversation in my driveway, sitting in a car,

620
00:29:28,920 --> 00:29:31,840
Speaker 1: and I had said, there is something about the fact

621
00:29:31,880 --> 00:29:34,640
Speaker 1: that none of the people I knew who you were

622
00:29:34,680 --> 00:29:37,000
Speaker 1: your friends when we met, that you don't speak to

623
00:29:37,040 --> 00:29:40,840
Speaker 1: any of them, and that's something to look at, you know.

624
00:29:40,920 --> 00:29:43,520
Speaker 1: I mean I was still there and others as well,

625
00:29:43,560 --> 00:29:46,040
Speaker 1: but there was a bunch of people who had who

626
00:29:46,080 --> 00:29:50,640
Speaker 1: were just gone, Okay, um, how do you think I'll die? Mary?

627
00:29:51,240 --> 00:29:54,400
Speaker 1: I don't think you'll ever die. Okay, you want to

628
00:29:54,400 --> 00:29:56,040
Speaker 1: be kept alive. You want to be fine. I don't

629
00:29:56,040 --> 00:29:57,640
Speaker 1: want to Yeah. So I'm one of those people that

630
00:29:57,880 --> 00:29:59,560
Speaker 1: So Brandon write this down for both of us, because

631
00:29:59,560 --> 00:30:01,360
Speaker 1: this is impre information for you to know. She wants

632
00:30:01,400 --> 00:30:04,800
Speaker 1: to be kept alive no matter what you want. When

633
00:30:05,200 --> 00:30:07,280
Speaker 1: when they tell you I'm brain dead, I don't want you.

634
00:30:08,200 --> 00:30:10,240
Speaker 1: She wouldn't want to live like this, Yes, she would.

635
00:30:10,760 --> 00:30:12,520
Speaker 1: You know when people say that I want to live

636
00:30:12,560 --> 00:30:14,280
Speaker 1: like that. So let's say after the fact to say

637
00:30:14,320 --> 00:30:19,520
Speaker 1: that the plug has been pulled. You want your brain cap? Yes,

638
00:30:19,640 --> 00:30:21,600
Speaker 1: I want everything cap, but don't even pull the plug.

639
00:30:21,680 --> 00:30:24,640
Speaker 1: She'd rather be a vegetable bed sores for the rest

640
00:30:24,640 --> 00:30:26,640
Speaker 1: of my like, flip me, sponge me down. I don't

641
00:30:26,640 --> 00:30:31,640
Speaker 1: care what because, yes, he is moving so fast. Don't

642
00:30:31,720 --> 00:30:35,240
Speaker 1: unplug me. Never unplug me. Michael can get remarried. You

643
00:30:35,360 --> 00:30:36,920
Speaker 1: all can get it. You can get a new best friend,

644
00:30:36,960 --> 00:30:38,840
Speaker 1: you can forget about me, don't visit. I don't care,

645
00:30:38,920 --> 00:30:41,920
Speaker 1: but don't unplug me. And then she's hoping that stem

646
00:30:41,920 --> 00:30:44,360
Speaker 1: cell research or whatever will come around in time to

647
00:30:44,480 --> 00:30:47,880
Speaker 1: resurrect her body. And when that happens, she's ready to rumble.

648
00:30:48,040 --> 00:30:49,840
Speaker 1: And you're the exact opposite. I want to be put

649
00:30:49,880 --> 00:30:53,640
Speaker 1: down if I get diagnosed. I'm tired, and I'm I

650
00:30:53,640 --> 00:30:56,160
Speaker 1: would be totally fine if I died tomorrow, so it

651
00:30:56,200 --> 00:30:59,479
Speaker 1: would be a joyous, wonderful experience. I would be excited

652
00:30:59,520 --> 00:31:02,000
Speaker 1: to get onto. I am excited about the sleep. Yeah,

653
00:31:02,040 --> 00:31:04,640
Speaker 1: in death, that seems What would you like us to

654
00:31:04,640 --> 00:31:06,160
Speaker 1: do with your body, Brandon? And do you have any

655
00:31:06,200 --> 00:31:08,480
Speaker 1: specific instructions that stuff me and just put me in

656
00:31:08,480 --> 00:31:10,880
Speaker 1: a chair at your house? You just want to I

657
00:31:10,960 --> 00:31:17,360
Speaker 1: just want to be with you. That sounds very very gay. Mary.

658
00:31:17,400 --> 00:31:20,520
Speaker 1: What's the worst thing that you've seen me do? Mhm,

659
00:31:21,240 --> 00:31:22,840
Speaker 1: trying to think of the worst thing I've seen you do.

660
00:31:23,040 --> 00:31:26,280
Speaker 1: I'm thinking that thermost shipping story is pretty much the worst.

661
00:31:26,320 --> 00:31:29,920
Speaker 1: But I think you think no, I think of it

662
00:31:30,000 --> 00:31:33,800
Speaker 1: as as yeah, as like god damn it, like I

663
00:31:33,840 --> 00:31:36,000
Speaker 1: can get out of any Yeah. Maybe I'm associating too

664
00:31:36,080 --> 00:31:38,280
Speaker 1: much shame with taking a ship in your car, and

665
00:31:38,320 --> 00:31:40,280
Speaker 1: I think I'm not proud of that part. But I

666
00:31:40,280 --> 00:31:42,320
Speaker 1: mean I would rather that not happen. It was uncomfortable,

667
00:31:42,360 --> 00:31:44,760
Speaker 1: but it was like I nailed it. I nailed it.

668
00:31:45,200 --> 00:31:46,880
Speaker 1: I mean I could have gone to a meeting afterwards.

669
00:31:46,880 --> 00:31:50,320
Speaker 1: Emisso it went so well. So I don't find that

670
00:31:50,640 --> 00:31:53,320
Speaker 1: I don't know the worst thing you've ever done. I

671
00:31:53,360 --> 00:31:57,600
Speaker 1: would say my most humiliating experience. I haven't a humiliating experience.

672
00:31:57,640 --> 00:31:59,560
Speaker 1: That she was different than worse. But I ask to

673
00:31:59,600 --> 00:32:03,240
Speaker 1: me about that. We were at that Kevin Huvane's party

674
00:32:03,360 --> 00:32:06,560
Speaker 1: and I was in a black out, but it was

675
00:32:06,600 --> 00:32:09,280
Speaker 1: because you were on a crazy diet. Well, I've been

676
00:32:09,320 --> 00:32:11,040
Speaker 1: in a plenty of blackouts that I don't have a

677
00:32:11,120 --> 00:32:13,280
Speaker 1: diet to blame. But this one. I was on that

678
00:32:13,360 --> 00:32:15,360
Speaker 1: because I haven't seen you drunk like that, like I've

679
00:32:15,400 --> 00:32:17,600
Speaker 1: never You always walk out of parties, like even if

680
00:32:17,640 --> 00:32:19,200
Speaker 1: you even if you yell at people on the way

681
00:32:19,240 --> 00:32:22,959
Speaker 1: out and I'm behind you apologizing, you do walk out.

682
00:32:23,360 --> 00:32:25,840
Speaker 1: This was like I've never seen anything like it. And

683
00:32:25,840 --> 00:32:28,280
Speaker 1: it was because you were on that hCG diet, so

684
00:32:28,440 --> 00:32:31,280
Speaker 1: just on a really really localories almost no eating plus

685
00:32:31,320 --> 00:32:33,680
Speaker 1: a shot. Yeah, I was doing that shot to my

686
00:32:33,720 --> 00:32:38,160
Speaker 1: thigh like a pregnancy h whatever. Any that combined with

687
00:32:38,320 --> 00:32:41,040
Speaker 1: it was only firstly there like an hour and you

688
00:32:41,080 --> 00:32:44,240
Speaker 1: were so you couldn't see straight, you didn't know where

689
00:32:44,280 --> 00:32:46,280
Speaker 1: you were. You were we carried you out, well, no,

690
00:32:46,440 --> 00:32:49,760
Speaker 1: I think Jeremy Renner and Chris Evan and Sandy Bullock

691
00:32:49,800 --> 00:32:51,680
Speaker 1: and I carried you out, came and got you guys,

692
00:32:51,720 --> 00:32:56,000
Speaker 1: and they're like, Chelsea's outside. I guess I was leading

693
00:32:56,040 --> 00:32:58,440
Speaker 1: against it. It was really bad. I don't remember. I

694
00:32:58,440 --> 00:33:00,560
Speaker 1: remember waking up at five o'clock in the in my

695
00:33:00,600 --> 00:33:03,560
Speaker 1: bunk beds and calling I was like, not even in

696
00:33:03,600 --> 00:33:05,840
Speaker 1: my big girl room and I call Mary. I'm like

697
00:33:06,000 --> 00:33:09,520
Speaker 1: what the fuck and be like, oh sweetie, that was bad.

698
00:33:09,760 --> 00:33:13,120
Speaker 1: It was You're like do you remember any public public

699
00:33:13,200 --> 00:33:16,360
Speaker 1: like bright lights, and every person in the industry is

700
00:33:16,400 --> 00:33:18,960
Speaker 1: the Oscar party. I think, yeah, but you know what,

701
00:33:19,040 --> 00:33:22,080
Speaker 1: there is a feeling about like that. Having it happened

702
00:33:22,080 --> 00:33:25,520
Speaker 1: there versus like a family affair, would I prefer because

703
00:33:25,560 --> 00:33:28,600
Speaker 1: everyone in Hollywood, like, not everybody, but there's enough people

704
00:33:28,640 --> 00:33:30,600
Speaker 1: that make asses out of themselves that there's a new

705
00:33:30,640 --> 00:33:33,800
Speaker 1: story every week. Like I would be more humiliated if

706
00:33:33,840 --> 00:33:36,600
Speaker 1: that happened at like, you know, my dad's funeral, because

707
00:33:36,600 --> 00:33:38,520
Speaker 1: then that would mean I'm like off the rails or

708
00:33:38,560 --> 00:33:41,800
Speaker 1: something like for some reason the context of it, it's

709
00:33:41,800 --> 00:33:46,520
Speaker 1: not good. So anyway, let's how long ages up? It's Tuesday? No,

710
00:33:46,760 --> 00:33:48,720
Speaker 1: I would say three? Was it about three years? Four

711
00:33:48,760 --> 00:33:51,680
Speaker 1: years ago? It was longer than that, really, Yeah, that

712
00:33:51,800 --> 00:33:57,200
Speaker 1: was like five years ago. Probably. She once caught me

713
00:33:57,240 --> 00:34:01,080
Speaker 1: stealing candy at one of her daughter's swim meets. But

714
00:34:01,160 --> 00:34:04,120
Speaker 1: you're stealing it for this for them? Yeah, I was

715
00:34:04,160 --> 00:34:09,440
Speaker 1: a sweet that's not bad. No, I don't know, trying

716
00:34:09,480 --> 00:34:14,200
Speaker 1: to think of like an actual event. You do you

717
00:34:14,280 --> 00:34:16,440
Speaker 1: do you have a memory that comes to mind when

718
00:34:16,480 --> 00:34:19,560
Speaker 1: you're asking her, like, you do you have something? We're like, oh,

719
00:34:19,640 --> 00:34:21,279
Speaker 1: this is the worst thing. I've done. I've done to

720
00:34:21,400 --> 00:34:24,479
Speaker 1: some party, is what I just thought of? I mean

721
00:34:24,800 --> 00:34:28,200
Speaker 1: in terms of character, like doing something bad. I don't know,

722
00:34:28,360 --> 00:34:31,480
Speaker 1: Like my bad is impulse, Like when I think about something,

723
00:34:31,520 --> 00:34:33,600
Speaker 1: I wouldn't you know what I mean? So like anything

724
00:34:33,600 --> 00:34:36,400
Speaker 1: I've done has always been like like I don't know

725
00:34:36,800 --> 00:34:38,840
Speaker 1: when when you think of yourself doing something bad, you

726
00:34:38,920 --> 00:34:41,279
Speaker 1: think of it in terms of like to yourself, or

727
00:34:41,320 --> 00:34:43,520
Speaker 1: like something that you've done that didn't that's bad to

728
00:34:43,560 --> 00:34:47,240
Speaker 1: someone else, like bad behavior, not like mean spirited behavior.

729
00:34:47,239 --> 00:34:49,319
Speaker 1: Would you have known that before you were your hands

730
00:34:49,320 --> 00:34:51,040
Speaker 1: brand and keep them where I can see them? Please?

731
00:34:51,160 --> 00:34:53,200
Speaker 1: Would you have been able to recall that before therapy

732
00:34:53,400 --> 00:34:55,239
Speaker 1: or only now that you're trying to work on the

733
00:34:55,239 --> 00:34:57,480
Speaker 1: empathy part? Not just like oh I feel bad for

734
00:34:57,520 --> 00:34:59,879
Speaker 1: this person, but like really how that person must have felt.

735
00:35:00,080 --> 00:35:02,120
Speaker 1: Remember how you said that thing to that girl at

736
00:35:02,160 --> 00:35:05,520
Speaker 1: that party. She had on a pink dress, when you

737
00:35:05,560 --> 00:35:09,240
Speaker 1: said something like, oh, that's like, um, I like your dress,

738
00:35:09,320 --> 00:35:11,560
Speaker 1: and I was like, right away, I get nervous because

739
00:35:11,560 --> 00:35:13,120
Speaker 1: I knew you don't like it, so right away my

740
00:35:13,120 --> 00:35:15,560
Speaker 1: blood runs cold, like I know the rest is coming.

741
00:35:16,320 --> 00:35:18,000
Speaker 1: And she was like, oh thanks, And she knew you

742
00:35:18,360 --> 00:35:19,800
Speaker 1: she knew each other when you were young or whatever,

743
00:35:19,840 --> 00:35:22,160
Speaker 1: and then she you said something like yeah, it's like

744
00:35:22,239 --> 00:35:25,480
Speaker 1: summer horror or something, and then just walked away. And

745
00:35:25,560 --> 00:35:28,680
Speaker 1: I know her, so I was left like, and she went, God,

746
00:35:28,760 --> 00:35:31,960
Speaker 1: that's so mean, huh. And I was like, she's just

747
00:35:31,960 --> 00:35:33,920
Speaker 1: trying to be funny. It's just her being funny, you know,

748
00:35:34,000 --> 00:35:35,640
Speaker 1: she just likes to make a joke and walk away.

749
00:35:35,719 --> 00:35:40,399
Speaker 1: And she just was like, Oh, that's so mean. That's mean.

750
00:35:41,520 --> 00:35:47,359
Speaker 1: You don't do that. I mean, yes, you, because I

751
00:35:47,440 --> 00:35:49,800
Speaker 1: know it is. But like I laughed at people listening

752
00:35:49,840 --> 00:35:51,600
Speaker 1: to this are going to laugh at that, because I

753
00:35:51,760 --> 00:35:54,000
Speaker 1: was like, it's like we know that brand of humor

754
00:35:54,080 --> 00:35:56,480
Speaker 1: associated with her where it's like when we really think

755
00:35:56,480 --> 00:35:58,000
Speaker 1: about it and know what type of person she is, like,

756
00:35:58,040 --> 00:36:01,279
Speaker 1: that's not nice. Well to the person, right, meaning if

757
00:36:01,320 --> 00:36:03,440
Speaker 1: she says it to me this listen, I'm not. I

758
00:36:03,440 --> 00:36:05,480
Speaker 1: mean I love all that about her too. It's like

759
00:36:05,600 --> 00:36:07,759
Speaker 1: that's the fun stuff, right, I mean, her point of view,

760
00:36:07,840 --> 00:36:09,960
Speaker 1: her angry point of view. That's why we sign up

761
00:36:10,000 --> 00:36:13,200
Speaker 1: for her every day. But I rarely do it too.

762
00:36:13,520 --> 00:36:16,480
Speaker 1: There's been some you wouldn't do that now, I would

763
00:36:16,480 --> 00:36:18,319
Speaker 1: not to the person's face not and if I did,

764
00:36:18,320 --> 00:36:20,000
Speaker 1: it would be somebody who knew me that I was

765
00:36:20,040 --> 00:36:22,360
Speaker 1: friends with. I wouldn't do it, Like, I don't not

766
00:36:22,480 --> 00:36:27,960
Speaker 1: any longer expect people to understand my personality that everything's

767
00:36:27,960 --> 00:36:31,799
Speaker 1: a joke, like I that's not their problem, that's my problem. Okay,

768
00:36:32,000 --> 00:36:33,560
Speaker 1: But you're both very funny and you kind of have

769
00:36:33,640 --> 00:36:36,000
Speaker 1: the same sense of humor. Yeah, we have a mean

770
00:36:36,040 --> 00:36:38,880
Speaker 1: sense of humor. We try not to be. Do you

771
00:36:38,880 --> 00:36:40,640
Speaker 1: try to keep each other like checked in that though,

772
00:36:40,640 --> 00:36:42,839
Speaker 1: because Mary, you're you are kind of vocal or like

773
00:36:42,960 --> 00:36:45,799
Speaker 1: you have looks for each other that you're like, no, Like, yeah,

774
00:36:45,800 --> 00:36:48,239
Speaker 1: but I mean, I think I have a mean sense

775
00:36:48,280 --> 00:36:50,920
Speaker 1: of humor, but I'm not mean to people, you know

776
00:36:50,920 --> 00:36:52,719
Speaker 1: what I mean, because there is a line I think

777
00:36:52,760 --> 00:36:55,360
Speaker 1: that now I just keep you know, I try and

778
00:36:55,440 --> 00:36:59,359
Speaker 1: keep more thoughts to myself. Do you both think that's

779
00:36:59,440 --> 00:37:03,000
Speaker 1: better that people have been more thoughtful that way, because like,

780
00:37:03,280 --> 00:37:05,239
Speaker 1: I've talked to people and I think it's too They've

781
00:37:05,280 --> 00:37:07,960
Speaker 1: gone too far one way and now nothing's funny anymore.

782
00:37:08,000 --> 00:37:10,279
Speaker 1: You can't joke about anything, like I think I was

783
00:37:10,320 --> 00:37:13,760
Speaker 1: talking to Chelsea about family guys not doing any gay jokes. Anymore,

784
00:37:13,760 --> 00:37:15,360
Speaker 1: which I think are some of the funniest ones on

785
00:37:15,400 --> 00:37:18,160
Speaker 1: the show. It's been around for I think like seventeen seasons,

786
00:37:18,440 --> 00:37:21,120
Speaker 1: and they're just taking them out completely. I don't know,

787
00:37:21,200 --> 00:37:23,439
Speaker 1: it's a hard think. I think that like it's good

788
00:37:23,440 --> 00:37:26,200
Speaker 1: for us to challenge ourselves to get humor in different ways.

789
00:37:26,200 --> 00:37:27,840
Speaker 1: It's interesting to hear you say that though, as a

790
00:37:27,840 --> 00:37:30,280
Speaker 1: gay man, because I always, whenever I hear white man,

791
00:37:30,560 --> 00:37:33,040
Speaker 1: the only ones really complaining about things not being funny

792
00:37:33,080 --> 00:37:35,680
Speaker 1: anymore white guys in my experience, So it's interesting to

793
00:37:35,680 --> 00:37:37,600
Speaker 1: hear you say that because while you're a white guy,

794
00:37:37,920 --> 00:37:40,399
Speaker 1: you're a gay white guy, But mostly I only hear

795
00:37:40,480 --> 00:37:43,400
Speaker 1: straight white guys going like, yes, just nothing's funny anymore.

796
00:37:43,400 --> 00:37:45,440
Speaker 1: It's like, yeah, you know, you'll figure it out. We're

797
00:37:45,440 --> 00:37:48,960
Speaker 1: still laughing, Like we're all still laughing, you know, people

798
00:37:48,960 --> 00:37:51,600
Speaker 1: of color are still finding things funny. It's so, I

799
00:37:51,640 --> 00:37:54,040
Speaker 1: don't know, but that's why that's interesting to hear your

800
00:37:54,080 --> 00:37:56,200
Speaker 1: point of view on that. But I think I think

801
00:37:56,200 --> 00:38:00,279
Speaker 1: there's still a lot to laugh at without you know,

802
00:38:01,280 --> 00:38:04,680
Speaker 1: poking fun at someone. Yeah, Like do you think I

803
00:38:04,719 --> 00:38:07,600
Speaker 1: think it's all and it's all kind of interrelated with

804
00:38:07,719 --> 00:38:10,680
Speaker 1: you know, I think, for instance, Brennan, I'm curious to

805
00:38:10,719 --> 00:38:12,520
Speaker 1: see are you. Were you as surprised like the Me

806
00:38:12,600 --> 00:38:14,560
Speaker 1: Too movement and all of the people that I know,

807
00:38:14,640 --> 00:38:17,560
Speaker 1: Mary probably wasn't as surprised as I was about how

808
00:38:17,640 --> 00:38:20,400
Speaker 1: rampant it was, because Mary has been like singing that

809
00:38:20,440 --> 00:38:22,480
Speaker 1: song for a while. Though it's a man's world and

810
00:38:22,520 --> 00:38:25,520
Speaker 1: like women are not respected, and I'm always like living

811
00:38:25,560 --> 00:38:28,759
Speaker 1: in this like Butterfly rarefied existence where just everything was

812
00:38:28,800 --> 00:38:30,880
Speaker 1: going great for me, So I assumed that not to

813
00:38:30,920 --> 00:38:32,799
Speaker 1: be the case because I was looking at my own

814
00:38:32,840 --> 00:38:36,279
Speaker 1: experience rather than other people's. But as a gay man,

815
00:38:36,440 --> 00:38:40,000
Speaker 1: were you as surprised to hear how rampant this kind

816
00:38:40,040 --> 00:38:43,319
Speaker 1: of abuse of power and sexual abuse was not at all?

817
00:38:43,400 --> 00:38:47,040
Speaker 1: Not at all, no, I But to me, like I'm

818
00:38:47,080 --> 00:38:48,680
Speaker 1: from the world west, you see it from the outside,

819
00:38:48,680 --> 00:38:51,520
Speaker 1: it's all very sparkly and exciting, and I think a

820
00:38:51,520 --> 00:38:54,360
Speaker 1: lot of those stories are these people coming here again

821
00:38:54,440 --> 00:38:56,480
Speaker 1: with that kind of allure of like, oh my god,

822
00:38:56,480 --> 00:38:58,080
Speaker 1: this is what the opportunities are going to be if

823
00:38:58,080 --> 00:39:00,319
Speaker 1: I do this thing. But I still think that there's

824
00:39:00,800 --> 00:39:02,719
Speaker 1: a sense for anyone, and I'm sure people will not

825
00:39:02,760 --> 00:39:04,320
Speaker 1: like this, but like if you're going to a hotel

826
00:39:04,440 --> 00:39:07,040
Speaker 1: room or a meeting, like, but we're thoughtful about this

827
00:39:07,080 --> 00:39:09,600
Speaker 1: with you, like you don't take meetings in your hotel room,

828
00:39:09,600 --> 00:39:12,120
Speaker 1: whereas I always thought like you would know right or wrong,

829
00:39:12,200 --> 00:39:13,920
Speaker 1: like you would know like don't take this meeting in

830
00:39:13,960 --> 00:39:16,319
Speaker 1: the hotel. But some people, really, I think, just come

831
00:39:16,360 --> 00:39:18,520
Speaker 1: into it thinking like this person is looking out for me,

832
00:39:18,560 --> 00:39:21,440
Speaker 1: they have my best interests at heart, like why should

833
00:39:21,440 --> 00:39:22,959
Speaker 1: this be weird? I'm not going to make it weird,

834
00:39:23,040 --> 00:39:24,239
Speaker 1: And now you have all these women. So I think

835
00:39:24,280 --> 00:39:27,759
Speaker 1: that's what was more surprising, was that the context that

836
00:39:27,800 --> 00:39:30,759
Speaker 1: we're finding out these things happened, or that like I

837
00:39:30,800 --> 00:39:32,719
Speaker 1: really did not expect this, And I think other people

838
00:39:32,760 --> 00:39:34,520
Speaker 1: have said, like you kind of know what you're going

839
00:39:34,560 --> 00:39:37,560
Speaker 1: to get if you do those things. But I think

840
00:39:37,600 --> 00:39:39,279
Speaker 1: I knew that there were things going on, but maybe

841
00:39:39,280 --> 00:39:41,160
Speaker 1: not in the way they were happening. Did you ever

842
00:39:41,200 --> 00:39:45,040
Speaker 1: get sexually assaulted by somebody at work, Mary, or did

843
00:39:45,080 --> 00:39:49,560
Speaker 1: you feel sexually uncomfortable? Yes? And I've also yes, I've

844
00:39:49,560 --> 00:39:54,200
Speaker 1: been two really yeah, for sure, I had a guy yes. Yeah,

845
00:39:54,560 --> 00:39:56,360
Speaker 1: And you would also argue that I have to and

846
00:39:56,400 --> 00:39:59,000
Speaker 1: just don't recall it, right, yeah, or laughed it off

847
00:39:59,120 --> 00:40:01,680
Speaker 1: or you know whatever, drop. But I haven't this an

848
00:40:01,719 --> 00:40:04,200
Speaker 1: interesting relationship to this too, because on the one hand,

849
00:40:04,239 --> 00:40:08,480
Speaker 1: I feel like most women my age spent decades, you know,

850
00:40:08,600 --> 00:40:10,600
Speaker 1: trying to keep their job and not funk the guy, right,

851
00:40:10,640 --> 00:40:12,520
Speaker 1: Like that's how we are laugh at enough jokes that

852
00:40:12,560 --> 00:40:15,560
Speaker 1: he feels flattered, but not just that one that you

853
00:40:15,560 --> 00:40:17,279
Speaker 1: don't laugh at too many because then he's gonna want

854
00:40:17,280 --> 00:40:19,319
Speaker 1: to see a naked right. So it's that fine line

855
00:40:19,360 --> 00:40:22,200
Speaker 1: we I mean women my age spent and I think

856
00:40:22,280 --> 00:40:24,680
Speaker 1: young women are not suffering from that now, which is fantastic.

857
00:40:24,680 --> 00:40:26,560
Speaker 1: I have three daughters, so I want all this change.

858
00:40:26,840 --> 00:40:29,360
Speaker 1: I do have a little bit of like an irrational

859
00:40:29,400 --> 00:40:33,640
Speaker 1: part of my brain sometimes that goes like complaining about that, like,

860
00:40:33,880 --> 00:40:35,840
Speaker 1: which is so messed up because I want all the

861
00:40:35,840 --> 00:40:38,399
Speaker 1: complaining is good and all this changes, oh my god,

862
00:40:38,480 --> 00:40:41,960
Speaker 1: long overdue and for the best. But I do have

863
00:40:42,040 --> 00:40:45,440
Speaker 1: this weird It's like it's like people who've been through it,

864
00:40:46,160 --> 00:40:48,399
Speaker 1: women my age must be like, fuck me, are all

865
00:40:49,000 --> 00:40:51,239
Speaker 1: we did that? Like we managed. I found a way

866
00:40:51,280 --> 00:40:54,680
Speaker 1: out of that room or that situation or that, But

867
00:40:54,719 --> 00:40:56,200
Speaker 1: I shouldn't have to find a way out of that

868
00:40:56,400 --> 00:40:58,520
Speaker 1: hotel room. I shouldn't have to find a way to

869
00:40:58,560 --> 00:41:01,080
Speaker 1: try to keep my job and not funk that guy,

870
00:41:01,400 --> 00:41:04,239
Speaker 1: or you know, I shouldn't have to not get the

871
00:41:04,320 --> 00:41:06,360
Speaker 1: job because I didn't funk that guy. Right, So, and

872
00:41:06,400 --> 00:41:08,400
Speaker 1: I hope for and I think through all of this,

873
00:41:08,440 --> 00:41:10,719
Speaker 1: and even though there's painful moments and sometimes we're gonna

874
00:41:10,760 --> 00:41:13,440
Speaker 1: overcorrect and go too far, and you know, it feels

875
00:41:13,480 --> 00:41:16,439
Speaker 1: like we're losing the ability to make jokes or whatever.

876
00:41:16,520 --> 00:41:19,280
Speaker 1: I think through all of this, I'll have three daughters

877
00:41:19,280 --> 00:41:20,840
Speaker 1: who don't who can actually have a meeting in a

878
00:41:20,920 --> 00:41:22,759
Speaker 1: hotel room. They should be able to have a meeting

879
00:41:22,760 --> 00:41:26,200
Speaker 1: in a hotel room, I would argue, and worried and

880
00:41:26,320 --> 00:41:28,400
Speaker 1: not fucking worried. Men should be able to have a

881
00:41:28,440 --> 00:41:32,000
Speaker 1: hotel hotel room meeting as well, and not assault and

882
00:41:32,040 --> 00:41:35,040
Speaker 1: not just take everything all the time. Yeah, it sounds

883
00:41:35,080 --> 00:41:36,839
Speaker 1: like there's gonna be a whole new generation of men

884
00:41:36,920 --> 00:41:39,360
Speaker 1: who really are fucking walking on eggshells. Yeah, well, for

885
00:41:39,440 --> 00:41:41,279
Speaker 1: right now, they're really piste off. I mean, I think

886
00:41:41,320 --> 00:41:43,319
Speaker 1: men are really confused. I hear it all the time.

887
00:41:43,320 --> 00:41:46,399
Speaker 1: White men arega, oh god, he can't say anything anymore, Yes,

888
00:41:46,440 --> 00:41:48,759
Speaker 1: she can. There's a lot you can say, you just can't.

889
00:41:49,480 --> 00:41:51,319
Speaker 1: It's it feels like the end of a party for them,

890
00:41:51,320 --> 00:41:53,480
Speaker 1: because it is the end of a party for them.

891
00:41:53,560 --> 00:41:56,680
Speaker 1: That's why it feels sad. They're sad. They're gonna mourn this,

892
00:41:56,920 --> 00:41:59,239
Speaker 1: this this world they lived in because it was a

893
00:41:59,239 --> 00:42:01,640
Speaker 1: world where they got to eat whatever they want, take

894
00:42:01,680 --> 00:42:04,839
Speaker 1: whatever they want, funk whatever they want. They wear sandals,

895
00:42:05,280 --> 00:42:07,080
Speaker 1: I mean, they show their feet, and they sit on

896
00:42:07,120 --> 00:42:10,600
Speaker 1: subway cars with their legs spread open. Take up three seats,

897
00:42:10,600 --> 00:42:15,280
Speaker 1: two fat. Fuck. That party's done. Women have had it.

898
00:42:15,280 --> 00:42:20,000
Speaker 1: It's over. And so yeah, I understand why they're pissed. Well,

899
00:42:20,160 --> 00:42:21,680
Speaker 1: it's like you're saying your you can either get on

900
00:42:21,719 --> 00:42:23,440
Speaker 1: board or you're gonna miss the train, like right, And

901
00:42:23,480 --> 00:42:25,400
Speaker 1: so they're gonna be angry, and it doesn't matter. Young

902
00:42:25,440 --> 00:42:27,759
Speaker 1: women don't care. I did this movie recently with a

903
00:42:27,760 --> 00:42:29,279
Speaker 1: bunch of young women and I was the only woman

904
00:42:29,400 --> 00:42:32,359
Speaker 1: my age and we were driving in a van from

905
00:42:32,480 --> 00:42:35,799
Speaker 1: base camp to set and the Transpo guy, the guy

906
00:42:35,880 --> 00:42:37,920
Speaker 1: driving the van, we were in stop and go traffic

907
00:42:37,920 --> 00:42:40,239
Speaker 1: with the transpo driver and I've never seen this. They're

908
00:42:40,320 --> 00:42:42,680
Speaker 1: usually really really professional, but he was showing pictures on

909
00:42:42,719 --> 00:42:44,880
Speaker 1: his phone to the guy in the passenger seat, and

910
00:42:44,920 --> 00:42:46,440
Speaker 1: I was in the back row of the van like

911
00:42:46,520 --> 00:42:48,960
Speaker 1: looking at it, like, oh god, oh my god, why

912
00:42:49,040 --> 00:42:51,359
Speaker 1: is he doing that? And this young actress in front

913
00:42:51,360 --> 00:42:53,040
Speaker 1: of me just like was in the middle of a

914
00:42:53,040 --> 00:42:55,480
Speaker 1: conversation with another young actress, and she literally just went

915
00:42:55,560 --> 00:42:57,200
Speaker 1: like this, hey, pal, get off your phone. What are

916
00:42:57,200 --> 00:42:59,280
Speaker 1: you doing? And then she just went back to talking

917
00:42:59,280 --> 00:43:01,640
Speaker 1: to her friend. And I was like, instantly through my body,

918
00:43:01,680 --> 00:43:05,680
Speaker 1: I felt relief that she'd said it and shame that

919
00:43:05,760 --> 00:43:07,839
Speaker 1: she'd said it. Like I was like wanting to apologize

920
00:43:07,840 --> 00:43:10,080
Speaker 1: to that guy because I felt that he'd be embarrassed

921
00:43:10,080 --> 00:43:11,879
Speaker 1: because it was a you know, a big van full

922
00:43:11,880 --> 00:43:13,880
Speaker 1: of people. And I thought, this is so interesting. She

923
00:43:14,000 --> 00:43:16,160
Speaker 1: felt Not only did she not feel embarrassed, she felt

924
00:43:16,200 --> 00:43:19,239
Speaker 1: completely happy speaking up for her safety and then went

925
00:43:19,440 --> 00:43:21,600
Speaker 1: right back into her conversation. She didn't like, had I

926
00:43:21,680 --> 00:43:23,640
Speaker 1: done the exact same thing, had I found the courage

927
00:43:23,680 --> 00:43:25,680
Speaker 1: to do it, which is so stupid, I would have

928
00:43:25,719 --> 00:43:28,239
Speaker 1: said this, hym, I'm so sorry. I was in an

929
00:43:28,280 --> 00:43:30,040
Speaker 1: accident a few years ago, and so I'm a little

930
00:43:30,080 --> 00:43:34,200
Speaker 1: bit crazy about like traffic and safety. If it's not

931
00:43:34,239 --> 00:43:36,160
Speaker 1: too much trouble do you mind putting away your phone?

932
00:43:36,200 --> 00:43:38,080
Speaker 1: I'm so sorry, but that's how I would have done this.

933
00:43:38,120 --> 00:43:39,480
Speaker 1: Is that what we're trying to get away from, like

934
00:43:39,480 --> 00:43:41,880
Speaker 1: a woman feeling needed to write, That's what I'm saying. No,

935
00:43:42,120 --> 00:43:43,880
Speaker 1: that's exactly my point. My point is hats off to

936
00:43:43,880 --> 00:43:46,719
Speaker 1: that girl in front of me. That's that's generational. And

937
00:43:46,760 --> 00:43:49,359
Speaker 1: so I hope my daughter never hope my daughters never

938
00:43:49,400 --> 00:43:52,400
Speaker 1: feel that way about speaking up for their own safety

939
00:43:52,640 --> 00:43:54,399
Speaker 1: or and I hope they live in a world where

940
00:43:54,640 --> 00:43:56,400
Speaker 1: they don't have to laugh at bad jokes just to

941
00:43:56,440 --> 00:43:59,600
Speaker 1: make some guy feel, you know, yeah, like you want

942
00:43:59,600 --> 00:44:02,080
Speaker 1: to fuck a fully you didn't have a boyfriend. How

943
00:44:02,080 --> 00:44:04,880
Speaker 1: many times I've said that that party is over? It

944
00:44:05,000 --> 00:44:07,319
Speaker 1: is amazing what men think that they can do and

945
00:44:07,360 --> 00:44:09,680
Speaker 1: get away with with because they have because they have

946
00:44:09,840 --> 00:44:11,640
Speaker 1: kind because we have a guy in the White House

947
00:44:11,800 --> 00:44:14,200
Speaker 1: who brags about sexual assault and is the leader of

948
00:44:14,239 --> 00:44:16,319
Speaker 1: the free world, So why shouldn't they think that. I

949
00:44:16,360 --> 00:44:17,960
Speaker 1: think like as a man is the type of men

950
00:44:17,960 --> 00:44:21,399
Speaker 1: who come out in supportive women like or take responsibility

951
00:44:21,400 --> 00:44:23,880
Speaker 1: for like, oh yeah, I've definitely done like gross dude

952
00:44:23,920 --> 00:44:26,120
Speaker 1: things like I think maybe Ben Affleck was one when

953
00:44:26,120 --> 00:44:28,279
Speaker 1: he slapped that woman's ass at a party and came out.

954
00:44:28,320 --> 00:44:30,400
Speaker 1: It's like, I'm so sorry for like the way I behaved,

955
00:44:30,440 --> 00:44:32,640
Speaker 1: but like I'm I'm growing, like I'm working on it

956
00:44:32,680 --> 00:44:36,000
Speaker 1: as a person, and I think we're we criticize them

957
00:44:36,000 --> 00:44:38,160
Speaker 1: still because it's like you should know better, But these

958
00:44:38,160 --> 00:44:40,359
Speaker 1: men who have really come out and I don't mind

959
00:44:40,800 --> 00:44:43,240
Speaker 1: process and that they're like, you know what, I made mistakes,

960
00:44:43,280 --> 00:44:46,120
Speaker 1: Like I'm really not. We can't change overnight. I think

961
00:44:46,160 --> 00:44:47,799
Speaker 1: that's great. I mean, I have a friend who man

962
00:44:47,840 --> 00:44:51,240
Speaker 1: explained me so hardcore recently, Like I said something about

963
00:44:51,760 --> 00:44:54,200
Speaker 1: I don't want the politician or something, and then he

964
00:44:54,280 --> 00:44:56,719
Speaker 1: literally said it back to me. I didn't even really

965
00:44:56,880 --> 00:44:58,799
Speaker 1: Sometimes man splainders will change a word or two to

966
00:44:58,840 --> 00:45:00,640
Speaker 1: make it sound like it's their idea, but he obviously

967
00:45:00,640 --> 00:45:02,839
Speaker 1: just liked the idea and then repeated it back word

968
00:45:02,840 --> 00:45:04,759
Speaker 1: for word, and I was like, I just I have

969
00:45:04,800 --> 00:45:06,720
Speaker 1: to say something. I was like, I can't. You can't

970
00:45:06,760 --> 00:45:09,080
Speaker 1: just repeat back the thing I just said to you

971
00:45:09,680 --> 00:45:12,480
Speaker 1: without even dressing it up as like your idea, Like

972
00:45:12,520 --> 00:45:15,399
Speaker 1: you just completely man splain me in the most aggressive way.

973
00:45:15,640 --> 00:45:17,200
Speaker 1: I can't, and I have to tell you as a

974
00:45:17,239 --> 00:45:20,040
Speaker 1: friend that that's what you did and isn't and he went,

975
00:45:20,120 --> 00:45:23,440
Speaker 1: I don't man, explain like and I went, and then

976
00:45:23,440 --> 00:45:26,520
Speaker 1: he went, I didn't mean to. And I thought, all right,

977
00:45:26,920 --> 00:45:29,200
Speaker 1: that we can work with I mean, listen, I didn't

978
00:45:29,200 --> 00:45:30,960
Speaker 1: even know that term before. I just knew. I lived

979
00:45:30,960 --> 00:45:33,120
Speaker 1: in a world where men always taught me things I

980
00:45:33,120 --> 00:45:35,759
Speaker 1: already knew. But now we know that word and we

981
00:45:35,800 --> 00:45:38,280
Speaker 1: can identify it, and that's it's going to be uncomfortable

982
00:45:38,320 --> 00:45:40,719
Speaker 1: for a little while right that. I think that's a

983
00:45:40,760 --> 00:45:43,960
Speaker 1: growth moment and that made me love that guy. Well.

984
00:45:43,960 --> 00:45:45,520
Speaker 1: I think that there's a lot of you have that,

985
00:45:45,640 --> 00:45:47,760
Speaker 1: especially in entertainment. From what I've seen, is that people

986
00:45:47,840 --> 00:45:51,960
Speaker 1: don't know what they're doing. Can seem condescending or rude

987
00:45:51,960 --> 00:45:53,520
Speaker 1: because I think some people are just trying to be

988
00:45:53,560 --> 00:45:55,319
Speaker 1: friendly or give you the information what this guy was

989
00:45:55,320 --> 00:45:57,840
Speaker 1: doing with or it's a habit that that's been created

990
00:45:57,880 --> 00:46:00,000
Speaker 1: over time and over time, and they don't know the difference.

991
00:46:00,000 --> 00:46:02,600
Speaker 1: It's because it's like a fish and water. They don't

992
00:46:02,600 --> 00:46:04,600
Speaker 1: know that they're doing it. But like this guy taking

993
00:46:04,600 --> 00:46:06,640
Speaker 1: a couple of seconds to reflect on what you've done,

994
00:46:06,719 --> 00:46:09,680
Speaker 1: being like, oh, yeah, I didn't mean to. Yeah, it's

995
00:46:09,680 --> 00:46:12,400
Speaker 1: a nice it's like a little yeah. I mean I

996
00:46:12,440 --> 00:46:14,759
Speaker 1: knew him much, so I felt comfortable saying it. But

997
00:46:14,920 --> 00:46:16,719
Speaker 1: you know, you don't have to worry. Yeah, but I

998
00:46:16,760 --> 00:46:18,839
Speaker 1: think it's so good that you said it. Yeah, it's

999
00:46:18,880 --> 00:46:21,480
Speaker 1: big for me because I'll tell you that van story.

1000
00:46:21,520 --> 00:46:23,200
Speaker 1: When I got off the van, that young woman just

1001
00:46:23,239 --> 00:46:25,080
Speaker 1: went into set and did her lines and was thinking

1002
00:46:25,080 --> 00:46:26,800
Speaker 1: about her work. And I got off the van and

1003
00:46:26,880 --> 00:46:28,600
Speaker 1: did ten minutes with the driver, like, Hey, not a

1004
00:46:28,600 --> 00:46:31,520
Speaker 1: big deal. I think you know some people anyway, I

1005
00:46:31,520 --> 00:46:35,160
Speaker 1: mean literally undermined everything she did. I hated myself for

1006
00:46:35,239 --> 00:46:37,359
Speaker 1: I'm telling that may be my most embarrassing. I'm proud

1007
00:46:37,360 --> 00:46:39,120
Speaker 1: of the therm pooping in the thermis. This I'm not

1008
00:46:39,160 --> 00:46:40,560
Speaker 1: proud of. Would you do that if it were a

1009
00:46:40,560 --> 00:46:43,759
Speaker 1: woman driver? Oh yeah, yeah. So maybe it's not as

1010
00:46:43,760 --> 00:46:46,400
Speaker 1: sex related. You're just worried about people's feelings. Yes, but

1011
00:46:46,440 --> 00:46:49,319
Speaker 1: it's gender. It's it's generational that the issue is not

1012
00:46:49,760 --> 00:46:52,160
Speaker 1: about him. Although maybe I was more sensitive because he

1013
00:46:52,200 --> 00:46:55,000
Speaker 1: was a man. I think I was meaning, yeah, I

1014
00:46:55,520 --> 00:46:57,879
Speaker 1: watched a man be dressed down by a young woman,

1015
00:46:57,920 --> 00:47:00,920
Speaker 1: and for me, as a fifty year old woman, and

1016
00:47:01,080 --> 00:47:02,560
Speaker 1: how I was raised in the world I was raised,

1017
00:47:02,560 --> 00:47:05,040
Speaker 1: and I was like, oh God, he's gonna feel super emasculated.

1018
00:47:05,120 --> 00:47:08,480
Speaker 1: That's not safe. I don't like when men feel emasculated.

1019
00:47:08,560 --> 00:47:11,959
Speaker 1: Let me make this better instead of just how about

1020
00:47:12,000 --> 00:47:14,520
Speaker 1: he doesn't get on his phone. Yeah, when he's driving

1021
00:47:14,560 --> 00:47:17,000
Speaker 1: a group of right, I know that to be true.

1022
00:47:17,960 --> 00:47:21,640
Speaker 1: It's interesting she did that, like and reflect on it

1023
00:47:21,719 --> 00:47:24,080
Speaker 1: so quickly after the the I think about that. Van

1024
00:47:24,120 --> 00:47:26,600
Speaker 1: read a lot because I also have three daughters, so

1025
00:47:26,640 --> 00:47:28,440
Speaker 1: I think, like I want them to live in a world.

1026
00:47:29,520 --> 00:47:31,719
Speaker 1: I bumped into furniture and apologize. I mean, women have

1027
00:47:31,800 --> 00:47:35,200
Speaker 1: a lot of we have a hard time taking up

1028
00:47:35,239 --> 00:47:39,640
Speaker 1: space and and and and and demanding what's ours. But

1029
00:47:39,719 --> 00:47:42,359
Speaker 1: I hope I see younger women not having as much

1030
00:47:42,480 --> 00:47:46,160
Speaker 1: trouble with that, and it's a real positive change. Okay, well,

1031
00:47:46,160 --> 00:47:51,560
Speaker 1: this sounds like a good time to take a break. Okay, Brandon,

1032
00:47:51,600 --> 00:47:53,399
Speaker 1: I see you whipped up some questions here, so we'll

1033
00:47:53,400 --> 00:47:56,040
Speaker 1: try and just entertain you with them. You wrote these, No,

1034
00:47:56,160 --> 00:47:58,560
Speaker 1: I don't know where these came from, but probably the

1035
00:47:58,600 --> 00:48:01,880
Speaker 1: cleaning lady. Probably. Um, what do you think that my

1036
00:48:01,960 --> 00:48:04,040
Speaker 1: cause of death will be? This is for both of

1037
00:48:04,040 --> 00:48:09,480
Speaker 1: you old age? Yeah, I agreed. If I didn't have assistance, managers,

1038
00:48:09,520 --> 00:48:11,600
Speaker 1: cleaning ladies, or any staff at all, how long do

1039
00:48:11,640 --> 00:48:15,160
Speaker 1: you think I would survive? Not long? Not long. You

1040
00:48:15,200 --> 00:48:19,040
Speaker 1: can't do a podcast for that assistant, I mean, for

1041
00:48:19,160 --> 00:48:24,520
Speaker 1: fox sake. What is that stupid book you gave me recently? Essentialism? Yeah?

1042
00:48:24,560 --> 00:48:27,400
Speaker 1: Fuck you? I was like, literally here this do you

1043
00:48:27,440 --> 00:48:29,759
Speaker 1: know what essentialism is? That? Just in the book like

1044
00:48:29,840 --> 00:48:33,000
Speaker 1: do less? I'd love to do less, you fucking asshole.

1045
00:48:33,480 --> 00:48:37,439
Speaker 1: I need you give me my bell, Brandon Tanner, who's

1046
00:48:37,480 --> 00:48:39,759
Speaker 1: your house? Who's your house? Guy? Now you give me

1047
00:48:39,760 --> 00:48:43,120
Speaker 1: those guys, and then I'll read essentialism. Willie so suck

1048
00:48:43,160 --> 00:48:47,680
Speaker 1: on that essentialism. Essentialism is good. Yes, I would love

1049
00:48:47,719 --> 00:48:50,680
Speaker 1: to do that. I would love to do that. You

1050
00:48:50,719 --> 00:48:53,120
Speaker 1: can do less, but just know your audience do that.

1051
00:48:53,840 --> 00:48:55,680
Speaker 1: Just know that you do too much. You don't have

1052
00:48:55,719 --> 00:48:57,960
Speaker 1: to do everything you do, you don't have to pay.

1053
00:48:58,280 --> 00:49:00,200
Speaker 1: But for you to say that you're great, I'm I

1054
00:49:00,200 --> 00:49:02,160
Speaker 1: have three lives who depend on me to do everything

1055
00:49:02,160 --> 00:49:04,359
Speaker 1: I do. I have fifteen people who depend on me too.

1056
00:49:04,400 --> 00:49:06,680
Speaker 1: They're not my children, but they depend on me. Okay,

1057
00:49:06,719 --> 00:49:09,680
Speaker 1: let's move on, Yeah, let's I mean, no one takes

1058
00:49:09,760 --> 00:49:11,920
Speaker 1: me seriously as a Bernie's are you listening to this?

1059
00:49:13,120 --> 00:49:18,000
Speaker 1: She doesn't even know I'm her mother. Okay, what is

1060
00:49:18,040 --> 00:49:20,160
Speaker 1: something you've seen me do that you would categorize as

1061
00:49:20,200 --> 00:49:26,840
Speaker 1: not normal? M hmm, Brandon, I mean I appreciate this

1062
00:49:26,880 --> 00:49:29,279
Speaker 1: about you, but like diagnosing other people and I'm giving

1063
00:49:29,320 --> 00:49:35,280
Speaker 1: them belves yeah, no, antibiotics. Yeah, but you will give anyone.

1064
00:49:35,520 --> 00:49:37,279
Speaker 1: Be careful everybody in here, because you will be on

1065
00:49:37,320 --> 00:49:39,239
Speaker 1: his EPAC before the day is out. But I also

1066
00:49:39,280 --> 00:49:41,400
Speaker 1: give you medication that you need. You know, when you

1067
00:49:41,440 --> 00:49:43,360
Speaker 1: go on a trip and you need xanax, I supply

1068
00:49:43,480 --> 00:49:47,200
Speaker 1: that or Sonata or whatever else. You know. I'm always

1069
00:49:47,520 --> 00:49:52,680
Speaker 1: I love pharmacy. Yeah, I know what people need. What

1070
00:49:52,840 --> 00:49:54,839
Speaker 1: kind of guy would you want me to settle down with.

1071
00:49:55,480 --> 00:50:00,799
Speaker 1: I mean, Brandon thinks it's me basically, who reads a lot,

1072
00:50:01,000 --> 00:50:04,719
Speaker 1: someone who skis really well, someone who I think most

1073
00:50:04,719 --> 00:50:06,879
Speaker 1: of all has to be really inquisitive. Like I think

1074
00:50:07,080 --> 00:50:09,839
Speaker 1: your ideal partner would be sometimes a partner, but your

1075
00:50:09,880 --> 00:50:13,040
Speaker 1: ideal person would be someone that you could like travel

1076
00:50:13,160 --> 00:50:15,920
Speaker 1: all over the world and just get into trouble, like

1077
00:50:15,960 --> 00:50:19,440
Speaker 1: go on adventures with someone really inquisitive. I think that's right, Brandon,

1078
00:50:19,480 --> 00:50:22,520
Speaker 1: wouldn't you second that emotion? Non industry they have like

1079
00:50:22,520 --> 00:50:27,120
Speaker 1: a job, separative entertainment. Yeah, skier. Skier probably does not

1080
00:50:27,200 --> 00:50:30,239
Speaker 1: live in the same city as you. Yeah, that's that

1081
00:50:30,440 --> 00:50:33,719
Speaker 1: not I hope that's not. Well, he can visit l A.

1082
00:50:34,000 --> 00:50:36,600
Speaker 1: He just I think ultimately you're going to be right. Okay,

1083
00:50:37,640 --> 00:50:40,040
Speaker 1: that's that makes sense. It would be hopefully someone who

1084
00:50:40,080 --> 00:50:43,920
Speaker 1: gets like who really just loves you for you. You

1085
00:50:43,960 --> 00:50:46,560
Speaker 1: know that you don't have to change for I think

1086
00:50:46,600 --> 00:50:48,440
Speaker 1: that's the key. I don't think so. I don't think

1087
00:50:48,440 --> 00:50:50,800
Speaker 1: I can change. I just already changed so much I

1088
00:50:50,960 --> 00:50:52,879
Speaker 1: have to go back to the other person. Have any

1089
00:50:52,880 --> 00:50:54,680
Speaker 1: more versions of me that can there be? This is it?

1090
00:50:54,680 --> 00:50:56,439
Speaker 1: I want to settle into this one because she's nicer

1091
00:50:56,480 --> 00:50:59,320
Speaker 1: and I do less apologizing. So the reason why I

1092
00:50:59,320 --> 00:51:02,440
Speaker 1: wanted to do this, Mary, thank you for accommodating my wishes.

1093
00:51:02,680 --> 00:51:05,440
Speaker 1: Happy to be here. This book is as funny as

1094
00:51:05,440 --> 00:51:07,439
Speaker 1: all your other books, and then has all this other

1095
00:51:07,560 --> 00:51:09,920
Speaker 1: breaks your heart as well. I mean it's really I mean,

1096
00:51:09,920 --> 00:51:12,839
Speaker 1: I've talked to so many people who are like in

1097
00:51:12,880 --> 00:51:16,080
Speaker 1: tears reading it and then feel sort of healed after,

1098
00:51:16,320 --> 00:51:18,840
Speaker 1: you know, I know, it's amazing that people would have

1099
00:51:18,880 --> 00:51:20,759
Speaker 1: to think, because I think a lot of people have

1100
00:51:20,840 --> 00:51:23,640
Speaker 1: similar experiences. You know, we sort of think we bury

1101
00:51:23,719 --> 00:51:26,560
Speaker 1: something really sad, or we bury our weakness and our

1102
00:51:26,600 --> 00:51:29,600
Speaker 1: sadness and our vulnerability and we turn it into anger, right,

1103
00:51:29,640 --> 00:51:31,799
Speaker 1: And that's and I think everyone can relate to that.

1104
00:51:31,920 --> 00:51:34,840
Speaker 1: So there's something really cathartic for people when they read it.

1105
00:51:34,880 --> 00:51:37,040
Speaker 1: But it is also really really funny. So I think

1106
00:51:37,080 --> 00:51:39,040
Speaker 1: it's that you're calling it to sit down. Tour is

1107
00:51:39,080 --> 00:51:41,839
Speaker 1: one of my favorite things. And also luckily I read

1108
00:51:41,880 --> 00:51:45,480
Speaker 1: that book that um you so aptly described Essentialism, which

1109
00:51:45,560 --> 00:51:48,480
Speaker 1: explained to me to Do Less Better, which is a

1110
00:51:48,520 --> 00:51:52,240
Speaker 1: book about saying no to more things and doing fewer things.

1111
00:51:52,280 --> 00:51:54,720
Speaker 1: And my lesson in this book and writing this book

1112
00:51:54,719 --> 00:51:56,160
Speaker 1: was that this is the one thing I mean, I know,

1113
00:51:56,200 --> 00:51:58,640
Speaker 1: I did a documentary. I was like campaigning Brandon, whatever

1114
00:51:58,680 --> 00:52:00,600
Speaker 1: you were talking about. I'm sorry if you're we're boring

1115
00:52:00,640 --> 00:52:04,560
Speaker 1: you right now, Um, he's on tender. Is that this

1116
00:52:04,640 --> 00:52:06,120
Speaker 1: is the first time I'm able to focus on a

1117
00:52:06,160 --> 00:52:08,360
Speaker 1: book tour, to go on a tour and to be present.

1118
00:52:08,480 --> 00:52:10,479
Speaker 1: That's my new thing is to be present with every

1119
00:52:10,480 --> 00:52:13,400
Speaker 1: engagement with every person all day long and not be

1120
00:52:13,480 --> 00:52:17,279
Speaker 1: distracted by bullshit or you know. And and so I'm

1121
00:52:17,320 --> 00:52:19,319
Speaker 1: going to do that tour in that vein and like

1122
00:52:19,520 --> 00:52:23,000
Speaker 1: really try and enjoy every moment instead of being angry

1123
00:52:23,040 --> 00:52:27,359
Speaker 1: at my success. H. There you go. Anyway, this has

1124
00:52:27,400 --> 00:52:29,560
Speaker 1: been an emotional morning you guys. I want to thank

1125
00:52:29,560 --> 00:52:33,000
Speaker 1: you all for being here, the two of you. Now

1126
00:52:33,040 --> 00:52:35,520
Speaker 1: the world knows my secret, and you're gonna be interviewing

1127
00:52:35,520 --> 00:52:38,759
Speaker 1: me in Phoenix, Arizona. Yes, which is May thirty one.

1128
00:52:38,880 --> 00:52:41,080
Speaker 1: Mary will be interviewing meith in Phoenix. And you can

1129
00:52:41,120 --> 00:52:43,080
Speaker 1: get tickets to that at Chelsea Handler dot com or

1130
00:52:43,160 --> 00:52:46,400
Speaker 1: Live Nation dot com. That's going to happen. And then

1131
00:52:46,440 --> 00:52:48,719
Speaker 1: we'll continue. And then Mary, you'll just have to pop in.

1132
00:52:48,760 --> 00:52:51,320
Speaker 1: Whenever we need to do a podcast, I'll just poop

1133
00:52:51,360 --> 00:52:53,279
Speaker 1: in some more thermisis so I've more to talk. Yes,

1134
00:52:53,320 --> 00:52:56,319
Speaker 1: please bring your thermis next time. Thank you. Life will

1135
00:52:56,360 --> 00:52:57,680
Speaker 1: be the Death of Me as a production of I

1136
00:52:57,760 --> 00:53:00,399
Speaker 1: Heart Radio. For more podcast from my Heart Radio, visit

1137
00:53:00,400 --> 00:53:03,319
Speaker 1: the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you

1138
00:53:03,360 --> 00:53:09,920
Speaker 1: listen to your favorite shows. H