1 00:00:00,240 --> 00:00:27,760 Speaker 1: Ridiculous History is a production of I Heart Radio Breaking news. 2 00:00:27,880 --> 00:00:33,479 Speaker 1: Special announcement, Fellow Ridiculous Historians, it's your it's your pals. Uh. 3 00:00:33,600 --> 00:00:37,080 Speaker 1: Super producer Max and Noel and I'm Ben. We are 4 00:00:37,120 --> 00:00:39,879 Speaker 1: doing something a little bit different this week, and we 5 00:00:39,960 --> 00:00:44,280 Speaker 1: wanted to give you a heads up that this this 6 00:00:44,520 --> 00:00:48,640 Speaker 1: week's episodes are there's something special. They might not be 7 00:00:48,720 --> 00:00:51,440 Speaker 1: for everyone. And s f W and s f K 8 00:00:52,240 --> 00:00:55,240 Speaker 1: just just unsafe. No, actually, I mean they're they're safe. 9 00:00:55,800 --> 00:00:59,200 Speaker 1: You know, sex is a thing that people, that's that's 10 00:00:59,240 --> 00:01:03,240 Speaker 1: that's existence about history throughout the species, you know, I mean, 11 00:01:03,280 --> 00:01:06,080 Speaker 1: how else would we have continued to exist and thrive 12 00:01:06,160 --> 00:01:09,200 Speaker 1: on this planet if it weren't for the sexy private 13 00:01:09,240 --> 00:01:11,560 Speaker 1: times and that we go into that in detail in 14 00:01:11,560 --> 00:01:14,160 Speaker 1: today's episode. You might hear men and I say some 15 00:01:14,240 --> 00:01:17,160 Speaker 1: things that you're not used to hearing us say, because um, 16 00:01:17,160 --> 00:01:20,640 Speaker 1: we joined Diana and Elive Ridiculous Romance and discussing the 17 00:01:20,760 --> 00:01:26,040 Speaker 1: history of sex, not just sex, but sex toys, implements 18 00:01:26,360 --> 00:01:30,600 Speaker 1: used not only for procreation but for pleasure. Yeah, well said. 19 00:01:30,800 --> 00:01:34,440 Speaker 1: And I don't know about everybody else, but I definitely 20 00:01:34,800 --> 00:01:38,840 Speaker 1: learned some things and we enjoyed we enjoyed this episode 21 00:01:38,959 --> 00:01:42,840 Speaker 1: so much, this two part episode with Ridiculous Romance, that 22 00:01:42,920 --> 00:01:45,920 Speaker 1: we wanted to put it directly on our feed and 23 00:01:45,959 --> 00:01:50,760 Speaker 1: we got Diana Analizes permission, so so they're great with it. 24 00:01:50,960 --> 00:01:52,880 Speaker 1: But this is also a great way for you to 25 00:01:52,960 --> 00:01:58,440 Speaker 1: get a taste of what you can encounter on Ridiculous Romance. 26 00:01:58,520 --> 00:02:01,400 Speaker 1: It's not always I feel like they want us to 27 00:02:01,440 --> 00:02:06,080 Speaker 1: say this, it's not always about sex toys, but come 28 00:02:06,160 --> 00:02:08,760 Speaker 1: for the puns and then check out check out their 29 00:02:08,840 --> 00:02:13,680 Speaker 1: fantastic show as well because it legit is hilarious. And 30 00:02:13,680 --> 00:02:16,040 Speaker 1: then seriously, this is probably on par with you know, 31 00:02:16,080 --> 00:02:17,680 Speaker 1: I know, when we do stuff with Jack and Miles, 32 00:02:17,720 --> 00:02:21,160 Speaker 1: we kind of allow ourselves to untuck our shirts a 33 00:02:21,160 --> 00:02:24,720 Speaker 1: little bit, let our hair down, our hairs. This one 34 00:02:24,840 --> 00:02:27,079 Speaker 1: kind of takes that to the next level. I would say, 35 00:02:27,120 --> 00:02:30,320 Speaker 1: so more on par with the George Carlin episode that 36 00:02:30,360 --> 00:02:33,320 Speaker 1: we did where um, there was about a list of 37 00:02:33,320 --> 00:02:37,760 Speaker 1: of blue words that were banned in broadcasting. This is 38 00:02:37,840 --> 00:02:39,800 Speaker 1: kind of like that. So definitely not a co listening 39 00:02:39,800 --> 00:02:42,399 Speaker 1: experience unless it's you know, you and your and your 40 00:02:42,480 --> 00:02:46,760 Speaker 1: lover that would be good. So without further ado, let's 41 00:02:46,800 --> 00:02:51,400 Speaker 1: dive into the history of sex toys. Hey, their friends 42 00:02:51,520 --> 00:02:55,320 Speaker 1: come listen. Well, Elia and Diana got some stories to tell. 43 00:02:55,680 --> 00:02:59,040 Speaker 1: There's no match making a romantic tips. It's just about 44 00:02:59,040 --> 00:03:02,160 Speaker 1: particulous with the ships a love. It might be any 45 00:03:02,160 --> 00:03:05,079 Speaker 1: type of person at all, and abstract cons that don't 46 00:03:05,120 --> 00:03:07,799 Speaker 1: a concrete wall. But if there's a story where the 47 00:03:07,880 --> 00:03:15,520 Speaker 1: second plans Ridiculous rom a production of I Heart Radio. Hey, guys, 48 00:03:15,560 --> 00:03:17,800 Speaker 1: thank you so much for coming on the show. Right, 49 00:03:17,919 --> 00:03:23,680 Speaker 1: I too, am very excited and enthused, So I'm sorry. Yeah, 50 00:03:23,720 --> 00:03:26,160 Speaker 1: we woke these guys up at three am and told 51 00:03:26,200 --> 00:03:28,200 Speaker 1: them they had to come jump on the show. Sorry, 52 00:03:29,320 --> 00:03:31,639 Speaker 1: sorry for interrupting. And I was like, can I can 53 00:03:31,680 --> 00:03:34,920 Speaker 1: I bring clothes with me? I didn't get an answer, 54 00:03:35,320 --> 00:03:38,040 Speaker 1: but I found I found a T shirt. Um, So 55 00:03:38,560 --> 00:03:40,560 Speaker 1: I'm just not going to stand up while we record 56 00:03:40,880 --> 00:03:45,000 Speaker 1: out of respect for one. Yeah, but I know that 57 00:03:45,080 --> 00:03:48,160 Speaker 1: we were massively excited first off, big big fans of 58 00:03:48,240 --> 00:03:54,320 Speaker 1: ridiculous room massively yes, massively excited, uh positively vibrating with 59 00:03:54,400 --> 00:04:01,000 Speaker 1: pleasure because this is a this is a know uh 60 00:04:01,360 --> 00:04:05,400 Speaker 1: one thing we love about ridiculous romances, uh your ability 61 00:04:05,480 --> 00:04:08,440 Speaker 1: to explore things in a way that we often don't 62 00:04:08,520 --> 00:04:15,200 Speaker 1: in ridiculous history when you agree no explore Sorry yeah, no, no, 63 00:04:15,280 --> 00:04:20,400 Speaker 1: definitely this is going to be a journey, voyage of 64 00:04:20,560 --> 00:04:23,840 Speaker 1: self discovery. Uh yeah, I mean we you know, we 65 00:04:23,839 --> 00:04:26,200 Speaker 1: we try to keep it pg. Thirteen And honestly, like, 66 00:04:26,360 --> 00:04:28,920 Speaker 1: there's no reason that the history of sex toys can't 67 00:04:28,960 --> 00:04:31,920 Speaker 1: be pg. Thirteen. I mean, it's history. These are things, 68 00:04:31,960 --> 00:04:36,600 Speaker 1: These are artifacts, These are historic relic sometimes sacred in 69 00:04:36,720 --> 00:04:43,039 Speaker 1: many cases. Yeah, the history itself definitely p us talking 70 00:04:43,080 --> 00:04:45,960 Speaker 1: about it. We'll say I love it though. Yeah, this 71 00:04:46,040 --> 00:04:47,960 Speaker 1: is us. This is like me and Ben's chance to 72 00:04:48,000 --> 00:04:51,320 Speaker 1: really let it all hang out. We take you guys 73 00:04:51,320 --> 00:04:54,920 Speaker 1: off the leash, and we'll see what happens. Okay, wait, 74 00:04:54,960 --> 00:04:58,640 Speaker 1: what do we is this? I trust you guys, Diana 75 00:04:58,760 --> 00:05:01,960 Speaker 1: hel Is this a uh? Is this a episode where 76 00:05:01,960 --> 00:05:03,680 Speaker 1: we need a safe word? Or where are we at 77 00:05:03,720 --> 00:05:05,479 Speaker 1: with that? You know, a safe word is always a 78 00:05:05,480 --> 00:05:09,680 Speaker 1: good idea if you ever feel uncomfortable. Definitely, just you know, 79 00:05:09,720 --> 00:05:11,440 Speaker 1: I don't know, scream at the top of your lungs. 80 00:05:11,440 --> 00:05:13,880 Speaker 1: Hard word, that will be our safe word, right, hard 81 00:05:14,080 --> 00:05:18,599 Speaker 1: is a great safe no potential for misunderstanding there. I 82 00:05:18,640 --> 00:05:20,719 Speaker 1: always just preferred. I think we've mentioned on the show 83 00:05:20,760 --> 00:05:22,560 Speaker 1: before that. I just think the ultimate safe word is 84 00:05:22,600 --> 00:05:28,240 Speaker 1: just safe word. Why did you or something? When you're like, 85 00:05:28,279 --> 00:05:30,200 Speaker 1: look safe word, it says it all. It's safe word. 86 00:05:30,240 --> 00:05:32,280 Speaker 1: Safe word. You're done. I'm done. I'm not going to 87 00:05:32,360 --> 00:05:34,800 Speaker 1: accidentally say safe word in passion in the moment if 88 00:05:34,800 --> 00:05:37,760 Speaker 1: I don't mean it, unlike pineapples, which comes up a lot. Well, yeah, 89 00:05:37,920 --> 00:05:41,920 Speaker 1: kindly stop ram rotting. Sorry, the safe word must be 90 00:05:41,960 --> 00:05:46,520 Speaker 1: submitted in writing in triple kit. This is a question 91 00:05:46,560 --> 00:05:50,080 Speaker 1: that I think is on both my mind and and knowles. Uh, 92 00:05:50,520 --> 00:05:53,680 Speaker 1: what are some of the like you guys have gone 93 00:05:53,760 --> 00:05:58,400 Speaker 1: into some really um it's at times controversial territory for 94 00:05:58,440 --> 00:06:01,839 Speaker 1: a lot of people. So one of the things that 95 00:06:02,040 --> 00:06:07,320 Speaker 1: I think you always approach from such an empathetic human 96 00:06:07,760 --> 00:06:15,120 Speaker 1: angle is the idea of people's sexual explorations, right, I 97 00:06:15,160 --> 00:06:18,360 Speaker 1: think because we call it ridiculous romance, and you've had 98 00:06:18,400 --> 00:06:22,840 Speaker 1: stories that are almost entirely just just the romance. Right. 99 00:06:22,920 --> 00:06:26,240 Speaker 1: But today when you when you when you all came 100 00:06:26,279 --> 00:06:30,640 Speaker 1: to us with this idea of sex toys, I at 101 00:06:30,720 --> 00:06:33,239 Speaker 1: least I can't speak for unial. I knew they were 102 00:06:34,000 --> 00:06:37,200 Speaker 1: ancient because people have been into this for a long time. 103 00:06:37,520 --> 00:06:41,240 Speaker 1: But I don't think I grasped, uh grasp whatever. I 104 00:06:41,480 --> 00:06:48,960 Speaker 1: don't think I understood how like how intertwined with society, past, 105 00:06:49,000 --> 00:06:52,600 Speaker 1: present and future these things have been. And is it 106 00:06:52,680 --> 00:06:55,040 Speaker 1: true like are we at a did we just as 107 00:06:55,080 --> 00:06:57,680 Speaker 1: a society get out of a period where these things 108 00:06:57,680 --> 00:07:00,880 Speaker 1: were taboo? I have so many questions. Uh yeah, I 109 00:07:00,920 --> 00:07:07,520 Speaker 1: think so. I mean especially dildos particularly were vilified. At 110 00:07:08,520 --> 00:07:11,160 Speaker 1: one point in history. They were very, very common and 111 00:07:11,200 --> 00:07:13,679 Speaker 1: awesome and everybody loved them, and then they were like, wait, 112 00:07:13,840 --> 00:07:15,960 Speaker 1: do you think my wife will like this dildo better 113 00:07:15,960 --> 00:07:19,640 Speaker 1: than me? And then they kind of fell out of 114 00:07:19,720 --> 00:07:22,840 Speaker 1: favor with a gentleman. What am I going to be 115 00:07:22,880 --> 00:07:28,240 Speaker 1: a better lover? It's it's remarkable how frequently male in 116 00:07:28,320 --> 00:07:35,560 Speaker 1: security shape's history so remarkable, so remarkable, almost too much remarkable. Um. 117 00:07:35,600 --> 00:07:39,120 Speaker 1: I also did learn too that because it allowed gay men, 118 00:07:39,240 --> 00:07:42,320 Speaker 1: dildos allowed gay men to have sex without you know, 119 00:07:42,400 --> 00:07:46,040 Speaker 1: without actually uh putting their own body parts in each other. 120 00:07:46,120 --> 00:07:48,280 Speaker 1: They were able to have sex when they had HIV, 121 00:07:48,480 --> 00:07:53,320 Speaker 1: and so they became synonymous with having HIV for as well, 122 00:07:53,360 --> 00:07:55,400 Speaker 1: if you had a dildo meant you were you were 123 00:07:55,600 --> 00:07:58,960 Speaker 1: like had a deadly disease, which is very weird. But 124 00:07:59,040 --> 00:08:02,120 Speaker 1: obviously that change to make all right. Well, you know, 125 00:08:02,160 --> 00:08:05,040 Speaker 1: they were trying real hard to make everyone very scared 126 00:08:05,080 --> 00:08:08,360 Speaker 1: of gay people. Um, that's true during that period, so 127 00:08:08,440 --> 00:08:10,640 Speaker 1: I think they were trying anything, and they were trying 128 00:08:10,640 --> 00:08:16,200 Speaker 1: anything with stick speaking of sticks, Speaking of sticks. Early 129 00:08:16,240 --> 00:08:18,560 Speaker 1: on though, I mean, like the attitude towards sex was 130 00:08:18,640 --> 00:08:22,360 Speaker 1: pretty la fair, like I mean the earliest days, and 131 00:08:22,400 --> 00:08:24,880 Speaker 1: then it went through the kind of puritanical phase and 132 00:08:24,880 --> 00:08:27,760 Speaker 1: then sort of his come full circle. Um in the 133 00:08:27,760 --> 00:08:29,600 Speaker 1: modern day. I know we're going to get there, but 134 00:08:29,800 --> 00:08:33,120 Speaker 1: why don't we take it back to like antiquity and 135 00:08:33,160 --> 00:08:40,160 Speaker 1: like the discovery of the first mystical dildo of the gods? Well, yeah, 136 00:08:40,160 --> 00:08:42,680 Speaker 1: we I mean, we have been digging up dildos for 137 00:08:42,679 --> 00:08:46,240 Speaker 1: a very long time. They think the first one humans, 138 00:08:46,280 --> 00:08:51,720 Speaker 1: not us personally, We've only been digging up dildos for 139 00:08:51,720 --> 00:08:55,319 Speaker 1: a couple of months. But humans your backyard, it's weird. 140 00:08:56,559 --> 00:08:58,840 Speaker 1: I have no idea how they got there. It was 141 00:08:58,880 --> 00:09:00,920 Speaker 1: the oldest house on the street, they tell us. So 142 00:09:01,120 --> 00:09:06,280 Speaker 1: there was nothing but farmlance every dildo have. Everyone would 143 00:09:06,320 --> 00:09:10,000 Speaker 1: hide their dildos in our backyard. No, yeah, human beings 144 00:09:10,040 --> 00:09:12,200 Speaker 1: have been digging up dildos for a very long time. 145 00:09:12,280 --> 00:09:15,880 Speaker 1: They think they found the very first dildo in a 146 00:09:15,920 --> 00:09:19,120 Speaker 1: cave in Germany that dates back to the Ice Age, 147 00:09:19,400 --> 00:09:22,880 Speaker 1: so twenty eight thousand years ago, and it's made of 148 00:09:23,040 --> 00:09:26,800 Speaker 1: chalk chalk, I guess you gotta stay warm, but jeez, 149 00:09:26,920 --> 00:09:29,520 Speaker 1: feels dry though, doesn't it like something like that? Why 150 00:09:29,559 --> 00:09:34,000 Speaker 1: would you want to put but you something? But I mean, 151 00:09:34,000 --> 00:09:35,839 Speaker 1: I guess we're really desperate and the ice ages, so 152 00:09:35,920 --> 00:09:41,360 Speaker 1: you could really leave your mark, chalk it up, chok 153 00:09:41,440 --> 00:09:45,640 Speaker 1: it after you a lack of supplies. I don't know 154 00:09:45,679 --> 00:09:47,560 Speaker 1: what couldn't lead. It's a fashioned one out of like 155 00:09:47,600 --> 00:09:49,840 Speaker 1: a block of ice, just kind of make it like smooth. 156 00:09:49,880 --> 00:09:51,400 Speaker 1: I guess it would melt, but it would take you. 157 00:09:51,840 --> 00:09:53,360 Speaker 1: Do you want to put a block of ice like 158 00:09:53,400 --> 00:09:55,920 Speaker 1: inside your butt? Because I can tell you I would 159 00:09:55,960 --> 00:09:58,920 Speaker 1: not like it could be interesting? Who knows? I mean? 160 00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:02,040 Speaker 1: And stimula. It was the Ice Age. They were very 161 00:10:02,120 --> 00:10:08,120 Speaker 1: used to that feeling. Whatever. Isn't there another old one 162 00:10:08,280 --> 00:10:12,319 Speaker 1: that was discovered? Um, I believe somewhere in like Syria 163 00:10:12,679 --> 00:10:15,080 Speaker 1: that was like made of stone. There were like stone 164 00:10:15,080 --> 00:10:21,520 Speaker 1: ones as well, ste ivory, jade, probably bones. I imagine 165 00:10:21,720 --> 00:10:24,959 Speaker 1: I feel like that's a that's an obvious one to make, 166 00:10:24,960 --> 00:10:29,800 Speaker 1: a sure um. And if you look up prehistoric dildos, 167 00:10:29,840 --> 00:10:34,240 Speaker 1: they have a wide variety of sizes and girths and 168 00:10:34,360 --> 00:10:39,000 Speaker 1: different foreskin like options. They even came with tattoos or 169 00:10:39,040 --> 00:10:42,320 Speaker 1: little illustrations carved in them. So I love that there 170 00:10:42,360 --> 00:10:45,000 Speaker 1: was some art. They're like branded. They were branded, they 171 00:10:45,000 --> 00:10:50,040 Speaker 1: were like dildo. They probably had a close personal relationship, 172 00:10:50,240 --> 00:10:57,440 Speaker 1: you know. I assumed that even in more uh collectivist 173 00:10:57,880 --> 00:11:01,600 Speaker 1: early societies, there were still things that were considered kind 174 00:11:01,640 --> 00:11:04,800 Speaker 1: of like your personal property, like hey, this like a 175 00:11:04,960 --> 00:11:09,240 Speaker 1: like a two shot, you know, or like you know, 176 00:11:09,400 --> 00:11:14,080 Speaker 1: or your button plug or your dildo. But so, by 177 00:11:14,080 --> 00:11:16,120 Speaker 1: the way, I'm a mistake, I said Syria just kind 178 00:11:16,120 --> 00:11:17,400 Speaker 1: of off the top of my head. It was Germany, 179 00:11:17,400 --> 00:11:20,080 Speaker 1: I believe where they found this, these collections of silt 180 00:11:20,120 --> 00:11:23,920 Speaker 1: stone Germany. Some of these were like monogram Germany. The 181 00:11:23,960 --> 00:11:28,320 Speaker 1: early forefront of this techno makes sense exactly of anywhere 182 00:11:28,320 --> 00:11:31,000 Speaker 1: in the world where would you look for a dildo? 183 00:11:31,240 --> 00:11:34,800 Speaker 1: But Germany. You listened to your show, that's awesome. So 184 00:11:35,760 --> 00:11:38,160 Speaker 1: so there's another thing, you know, Diane, you found this 185 00:11:38,200 --> 00:11:41,720 Speaker 1: in your Researchen's something that really stood out to me 186 00:11:41,840 --> 00:11:43,920 Speaker 1: because you think a lot about not to get two 187 00:11:43,920 --> 00:11:46,480 Speaker 1: in the weeds, so you think a lot about uh, 188 00:11:46,720 --> 00:11:51,160 Speaker 1: material science to put it in the lamest way possible, Like, uh, 189 00:11:52,480 --> 00:11:54,160 Speaker 1: it makes sense that there would be something like a 190 00:11:54,240 --> 00:11:58,400 Speaker 1: smooth stone or ivory your bone or even would that 191 00:11:58,400 --> 00:12:01,120 Speaker 1: would make sense and probably have less of a risk 192 00:12:01,160 --> 00:12:07,280 Speaker 1: of injury or irritation. But what's up with the incredibly 193 00:12:07,360 --> 00:12:24,040 Speaker 1: silly name The Holdest Boy b O? I by pretty 194 00:12:24,080 --> 00:12:26,800 Speaker 1: good brandy, But yeah, what's the deal with that? This 195 00:12:26,840 --> 00:12:29,640 Speaker 1: is a dates back to ancient Greece, I believe, and 196 00:12:29,679 --> 00:12:33,680 Speaker 1: then carried over to some other adjacent culture. Oh yeah, 197 00:12:33,679 --> 00:12:37,000 Speaker 1: they were stuffed phalluses and they were made of polished leather, 198 00:12:37,559 --> 00:12:39,680 Speaker 1: and I guess that partly Sometimes you would even find 199 00:12:39,679 --> 00:12:42,640 Speaker 1: the stone ones with like a leather sheath so they 200 00:12:42,640 --> 00:12:48,000 Speaker 1: would be warmer and softer when okay there, um, so 201 00:12:48,040 --> 00:12:49,920 Speaker 1: that's part that was smart. I feel like they were 202 00:12:49,920 --> 00:12:52,520 Speaker 1: really thinking about comfort at some point, and they were like, 203 00:12:52,559 --> 00:12:55,160 Speaker 1: you know, while we're making coats and shoes, let's go 204 00:12:55,200 --> 00:13:01,840 Speaker 1: ahead set some aside. Somebody said, ladies, siltstone just isn't 205 00:13:01,880 --> 00:13:05,840 Speaker 1: doing it for me. A lot of russage and they 206 00:13:06,200 --> 00:13:11,880 Speaker 1: didn't work. Yeah, leather. Well, speaking of chafe, the ancient 207 00:13:11,920 --> 00:13:16,120 Speaker 1: Greeks would also use olive oil as a lubricant, So 208 00:13:17,480 --> 00:13:20,600 Speaker 1: there goes your chafing problem. You just get that bad boy, 209 00:13:20,600 --> 00:13:24,640 Speaker 1: that bad alive boy dipped in some olive oil. Surely 210 00:13:24,679 --> 00:13:27,280 Speaker 1: that that enters into the etymology of the word, right, 211 00:13:27,360 --> 00:13:31,440 Speaker 1: does that all his boy referencing oil? I wonder they 212 00:13:31,520 --> 00:13:33,200 Speaker 1: just I don't know. I always do this where I 213 00:13:33,240 --> 00:13:35,960 Speaker 1: see two vaguely similar words and I'm like, they must 214 00:13:35,960 --> 00:13:40,000 Speaker 1: be related. There's no way they're not. Pretty incidence because 215 00:13:40,000 --> 00:13:41,720 Speaker 1: I believe this is the first version of this that 216 00:13:41,880 --> 00:13:44,880 Speaker 1: was called this, and there were other cultures that used 217 00:13:45,040 --> 00:13:47,080 Speaker 1: that that term as well. It makes me think of 218 00:13:47,080 --> 00:13:50,080 Speaker 1: have you guys ever seen the movie Caligula? You know, 219 00:13:50,120 --> 00:13:53,880 Speaker 1: I didn't watch. Yeah, it's it's it's a lot. It 220 00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:57,079 Speaker 1: was produced by the publisher of Penthouse and they wanted 221 00:13:57,120 --> 00:14:01,720 Speaker 1: it to be like full Front Orgy or Giastic rat City. 222 00:14:01,720 --> 00:14:04,440 Speaker 1: But it's also like, you know, a really expensive, you know, 223 00:14:04,559 --> 00:14:09,680 Speaker 1: period movie with Malcolm McDowell playing the titular psychopath Emperor 224 00:14:09,720 --> 00:14:12,800 Speaker 1: of Rome. And there's a scene where he um he 225 00:14:12,880 --> 00:14:19,000 Speaker 1: uses olive oil uh to loop up his fist a thing. Yeah, 226 00:14:19,240 --> 00:14:23,400 Speaker 1: like like, I've got the etymology because the thinking of 227 00:14:23,440 --> 00:14:25,840 Speaker 1: this as well, and you know English being such a 228 00:14:27,320 --> 00:14:33,120 Speaker 1: language of the lazy and plagi plagiaristic people of the world. Uh, 229 00:14:33,560 --> 00:14:35,360 Speaker 1: we end up with a lot of things that may 230 00:14:35,400 --> 00:14:39,080 Speaker 1: seem like they are falsely related. But according to this 231 00:14:39,640 --> 00:14:42,400 Speaker 1: all his boy, which is the funny one is the 232 00:14:42,480 --> 00:14:47,720 Speaker 1: plural of olibos, which is ancient Greek for to slip, 233 00:14:48,040 --> 00:14:51,520 Speaker 1: to glide. You know, like that slipping slide commercial in 234 00:14:51,640 --> 00:14:58,640 Speaker 1: the eighties, right, you take a jump and take a die. Yeah. 235 00:14:58,800 --> 00:15:02,000 Speaker 1: I was like what And then Eli, you and I 236 00:15:02,040 --> 00:15:07,200 Speaker 1: are the olds in this conversation, whereas yeah, where I 237 00:15:07,280 --> 00:15:12,760 Speaker 1: as I believe olive is unrelated etymo logically, but dang 238 00:15:12,840 --> 00:15:23,680 Speaker 1: it again, Olive exactly like a game boy this. I'm 239 00:15:23,680 --> 00:15:25,960 Speaker 1: going to go retire to be with my olive boy. 240 00:15:26,600 --> 00:15:32,040 Speaker 1: There's another interesting thing here. We're talking about the cyclical 241 00:15:32,240 --> 00:15:36,320 Speaker 1: ups and downs of sex positivity for lack of a 242 00:15:36,360 --> 00:15:40,480 Speaker 1: better word, throughout human history. One thing that surprised me 243 00:15:40,560 --> 00:15:45,120 Speaker 1: in the research here is that the Greek men, to 244 00:15:45,160 --> 00:15:48,600 Speaker 1: your point about male insecurity, like the Greek men who 245 00:15:48,640 --> 00:15:51,920 Speaker 1: would go off to fighting wars were actually on board 246 00:15:52,400 --> 00:15:58,120 Speaker 1: with giving giving an olive boy to their partners. That yeah, 247 00:15:58,240 --> 00:16:01,320 Speaker 1: they thought that if women were left too long without 248 00:16:01,520 --> 00:16:06,680 Speaker 1: an injection of sperm in them, at some point, they 249 00:16:06,720 --> 00:16:11,800 Speaker 1: would eventually get hysteria or something called a wandering uterus. 250 00:16:13,640 --> 00:16:16,240 Speaker 1: Which I know. It's a tough time around the house 251 00:16:16,240 --> 00:16:20,160 Speaker 1: when my uterus jumps out and starts. It starts around myself, 252 00:16:20,440 --> 00:16:22,480 Speaker 1: you know, we get we always get calls from the neighbors. 253 00:16:23,240 --> 00:16:26,320 Speaker 1: Uterus is loose again, you know, a little buddy. You 254 00:16:26,440 --> 00:16:28,800 Speaker 1: just need a higher fence. I keep saying. I thought 255 00:16:28,800 --> 00:16:31,200 Speaker 1: I felt a little lighter, trying to find itself, you know, 256 00:16:31,320 --> 00:16:33,560 Speaker 1: it's just trying to understand who it really is, Like 257 00:16:33,640 --> 00:16:37,040 Speaker 1: what am I doing. I gotta say that this this 258 00:16:37,120 --> 00:16:40,160 Speaker 1: concept though, of like leaving the women with a dildo 259 00:16:40,240 --> 00:16:42,200 Speaker 1: so that they wouldn't you know, the uteruses wouldn't wonder. 260 00:16:42,320 --> 00:16:44,280 Speaker 1: It gives a whole new meaning to the phrase left 261 00:16:44,320 --> 00:16:50,680 Speaker 1: to their own devices. We have to have to noculate 262 00:16:50,760 --> 00:16:54,440 Speaker 1: you with sperm or else we will go insane, which 263 00:16:54,480 --> 00:16:56,920 Speaker 1: is so funny, and that I mean. It's noted here, 264 00:16:56,960 --> 00:17:00,200 Speaker 1: of course, that hysteria and sex toys have at a 265 00:17:00,400 --> 00:17:04,480 Speaker 1: very long historical link, mostly for women. You know, doctors 266 00:17:04,520 --> 00:17:08,680 Speaker 1: would uh do a pelvic massage for women that would 267 00:17:08,680 --> 00:17:13,600 Speaker 1: result in a paroxysm. Uh I was supposed to cure 268 00:17:13,600 --> 00:17:15,680 Speaker 1: them of hysteria, and I bet a lot of women 269 00:17:15,680 --> 00:17:18,000 Speaker 1: were like, yeah, I feel so hysterical today. I don't 270 00:17:18,000 --> 00:17:24,040 Speaker 1: know doctor showing me how I could do this maybe 271 00:17:24,080 --> 00:17:26,960 Speaker 1: at home for myself when a hysteria just comes on. 272 00:17:30,960 --> 00:17:34,720 Speaker 1: He's like, no, I think you need a professional. Was 273 00:17:34,760 --> 00:17:37,600 Speaker 1: this kind of like a like a slow shift, because 274 00:17:37,600 --> 00:17:40,600 Speaker 1: it seems like at first these sex toys are purely 275 00:17:40,840 --> 00:17:44,760 Speaker 1: meant for kind of you know, the most hedonistic of pleasures, um, 276 00:17:44,840 --> 00:17:47,160 Speaker 1: and then it starts to be more functional, where it's 277 00:17:47,200 --> 00:17:48,960 Speaker 1: like I am the man. I I you know, you 278 00:17:49,000 --> 00:17:51,200 Speaker 1: are my property and I'm going to give you this 279 00:17:51,400 --> 00:17:53,480 Speaker 1: as a stand in for me while I'm away. But 280 00:17:53,560 --> 00:17:56,119 Speaker 1: then it kind of started moving more towards like being 281 00:17:56,359 --> 00:17:58,800 Speaker 1: a medical device, right or we maybe we're not quite 282 00:17:58,840 --> 00:18:03,760 Speaker 1: there yet, but I think vibrators more specifically, we're we're 283 00:18:03,880 --> 00:18:07,720 Speaker 1: marketed as medical devices and dildos were not. So I 284 00:18:07,720 --> 00:18:11,960 Speaker 1: think that's why dildos actually had more controversy on them 285 00:18:12,000 --> 00:18:16,040 Speaker 1: than vibrators ever did, because vibrators never really had Yeah, 286 00:18:16,160 --> 00:18:18,480 Speaker 1: vibrators never really seemed to be a problem for people. 287 00:18:18,520 --> 00:18:21,200 Speaker 1: They were like, cool, whatever, get your steampowered thing and 288 00:18:21,800 --> 00:18:24,600 Speaker 1: have at it. But like, but it was like a 289 00:18:24,640 --> 00:18:27,800 Speaker 1: medical thing because ladies are so crazy they have to 290 00:18:27,840 --> 00:18:30,960 Speaker 1: have something, I guess. But with dildos it was more 291 00:18:30,960 --> 00:18:35,520 Speaker 1: about like actual penetration and men could use them, and 292 00:18:35,640 --> 00:18:38,320 Speaker 1: you know, lesbians used them and stuff, so it became 293 00:18:38,440 --> 00:18:41,439 Speaker 1: like more of a I guess I could see that. 294 00:18:41,560 --> 00:18:44,960 Speaker 1: You know, if you've got something the vibrates, then the men, 295 00:18:45,119 --> 00:18:47,480 Speaker 1: you know, well I can't do that, so at least 296 00:18:47,520 --> 00:18:49,359 Speaker 1: that's a different device. But if it's just a dildo, 297 00:18:49,480 --> 00:18:52,239 Speaker 1: I've got a perfectly good dick right here. What's the 298 00:18:52,240 --> 00:18:54,040 Speaker 1: problem you want to you want to dick in you? 299 00:18:54,200 --> 00:18:58,040 Speaker 1: I can make that happen. Yeah, getting a little more 300 00:18:58,119 --> 00:19:01,800 Speaker 1: aggravated about the diage. Maybe this is a great spot 301 00:19:01,840 --> 00:19:09,040 Speaker 1: for a break, So we'll be right back. Welcome back everyone. 302 00:19:09,600 --> 00:19:12,560 Speaker 1: So there's another question that I had that was a 303 00:19:12,720 --> 00:19:19,359 Speaker 1: very I guess, practical question, Like, obviously a chalk like 304 00:19:19,400 --> 00:19:23,119 Speaker 1: a dildo devised the chalk. It sounds like it's what 305 00:19:23,240 --> 00:19:25,720 Speaker 1: the person had to work with at the time. But 306 00:19:25,920 --> 00:19:29,640 Speaker 1: when you're thinking about people in the natural world where 307 00:19:29,640 --> 00:19:32,200 Speaker 1: there's not nearly as much technology as there is today 308 00:19:32,240 --> 00:19:36,560 Speaker 1: in two as we record this, wouldn't the natural world 309 00:19:36,680 --> 00:19:39,879 Speaker 1: already have some kind of like phallic thing you could 310 00:19:39,960 --> 00:19:42,960 Speaker 1: mess with, Like I don't know, I'm gonna make the 311 00:19:43,040 --> 00:19:46,960 Speaker 1: laziest choices like I was. No, we're not gonna tell 312 00:19:47,000 --> 00:19:51,679 Speaker 1: that story, Like, okay, I'll say it. So I was 313 00:19:51,720 --> 00:19:56,320 Speaker 1: in a grocery store during the height of the lockdown. 314 00:19:56,320 --> 00:19:58,840 Speaker 1: Will only go out from necessessin's whatever be massed up 315 00:19:58,840 --> 00:20:01,400 Speaker 1: and everything man been out in public in a while, 316 00:20:01,920 --> 00:20:04,680 Speaker 1: and the entire I think I mentioned to you guys 317 00:20:04,720 --> 00:20:08,040 Speaker 1: off air, the entire grocery store was filled with a 318 00:20:08,119 --> 00:20:12,960 Speaker 1: weirdly unnecessary sexual tension because people hadn't seen each other 319 00:20:13,000 --> 00:20:16,119 Speaker 1: in a while. Everybody's got an aura of mystery because 320 00:20:16,320 --> 00:20:19,040 Speaker 1: you know, two thirds of their faces covered. And I 321 00:20:19,080 --> 00:20:22,639 Speaker 1: was in the produce aisle and this, uh, there's a 322 00:20:22,680 --> 00:20:24,720 Speaker 1: person there, and I can tell you much more about 323 00:20:24,760 --> 00:20:30,160 Speaker 1: them who saw me, like selecting cucumbers for some stuff 324 00:20:30,200 --> 00:20:32,760 Speaker 1: I was gonna cook, and we're staring at me hard 325 00:20:33,040 --> 00:20:36,320 Speaker 1: to the point where I just put down the cucumbers 326 00:20:36,359 --> 00:20:40,160 Speaker 1: and thought, I'm gonna cook something else because this this 327 00:20:40,240 --> 00:20:44,639 Speaker 1: person is reading this more into this situation than you know, 328 00:20:44,880 --> 00:20:48,960 Speaker 1: my lay mass salad or whatever. And why I think 329 00:20:48,960 --> 00:20:51,280 Speaker 1: of that? You know, we like it's a trope in 330 00:20:51,800 --> 00:20:55,520 Speaker 1: it's a trope in so much Western Eurotica as well, 331 00:20:55,640 --> 00:20:59,440 Speaker 1: like watch this person eat fruit or whatever. So did 332 00:20:59,480 --> 00:21:02,520 Speaker 1: that play a role in the history of sex toys? 333 00:21:02,560 --> 00:21:06,240 Speaker 1: Most definitely. They're like ancient texts like Arabian Nights that 334 00:21:06,280 --> 00:21:10,560 Speaker 1: talk about fruit and vegetables and just any penis shaped object. 335 00:21:11,440 --> 00:21:13,880 Speaker 1: But the best one I saw was from this Ming 336 00:21:14,000 --> 00:21:17,320 Speaker 1: dynasty writer Taut sung E. And you know, we don't 337 00:21:17,320 --> 00:21:22,200 Speaker 1: speak Cantonese, but we try. Circuit thirteen sixty he wrote 338 00:21:22,240 --> 00:21:26,919 Speaker 1: about something called the Cantonese growing, which was a route 339 00:21:27,119 --> 00:21:30,560 Speaker 1: sufficiently penish shaped to be used as a dildo, mostly 340 00:21:30,600 --> 00:21:33,960 Speaker 1: by peasant women in like the country, rural areas. And 341 00:21:34,119 --> 00:21:38,000 Speaker 1: interestingly it was also called an olspos, So they probably 342 00:21:38,000 --> 00:21:42,960 Speaker 1: got that from ancient Greece. I imagine such a similar name, 343 00:21:43,080 --> 00:21:46,280 Speaker 1: yeah right, such a similar name. It must have been 344 00:21:46,960 --> 00:21:50,959 Speaker 1: the legend of this Cantonese groin is quote. In the 345 00:21:51,000 --> 00:21:55,960 Speaker 1: pastures of the Tartars, wild horses often copulate with dragons. 346 00:21:56,440 --> 00:21:59,359 Speaker 1: Drops of the semen will fall down and enter the earth, 347 00:21:59,640 --> 00:22:03,040 Speaker 1: and at for some time put forth shoots resembling bamboo 348 00:22:03,080 --> 00:22:07,280 Speaker 1: sprouts of pointed shape and covered with small scales close 349 00:22:07,359 --> 00:22:09,919 Speaker 1: together like the teeth of a comb, and with a 350 00:22:10,000 --> 00:22:15,320 Speaker 1: network of veins, making them very similar to the male member. Okay, 351 00:22:15,440 --> 00:22:18,360 Speaker 1: do you guys have teeth of a comb on your dad? 352 00:22:20,560 --> 00:22:25,840 Speaker 1: For you to ask me that, well, to be fair, 353 00:22:25,880 --> 00:22:28,199 Speaker 1: I mean not to get to you know, anatomically correct, 354 00:22:28,400 --> 00:22:31,000 Speaker 1: but why not. There is a seam, you know, on 355 00:22:31,080 --> 00:22:34,920 Speaker 1: the bottom of of of a penis that is vaguely 356 00:22:35,040 --> 00:22:37,720 Speaker 1: comb like or it's like a ridge kind of things, 357 00:22:38,040 --> 00:22:44,560 Speaker 1: zig zaggy kind of you. But yeah, the veiny part 358 00:22:44,760 --> 00:22:49,080 Speaker 1: is always just you know, sometimes I get these sweet 359 00:22:49,080 --> 00:22:51,760 Speaker 1: potatoes everything store that have all these veins up along 360 00:22:51,760 --> 00:22:54,720 Speaker 1: the side of them. It's very very upsetting trying to 361 00:22:54,920 --> 00:22:58,919 Speaker 1: say sweet potato, that's a very sweet any of the 362 00:22:58,960 --> 00:23:03,639 Speaker 1: produce section in general, you just got it. Don't go 363 00:23:04,119 --> 00:23:07,440 Speaker 1: when you skip cucumbers, where do you go? Because almost 364 00:23:07,480 --> 00:23:11,080 Speaker 1: everything well, it's so funny. The emoji is eggplant, which 365 00:23:11,160 --> 00:23:12,960 Speaker 1: is the one I would probably not turn to you 366 00:23:13,240 --> 00:23:21,560 Speaker 1: in a crisis. And actually another ming writer named Lee 367 00:23:21,680 --> 00:23:24,920 Speaker 1: you wrote a theatrical play about a lesbian couple who 368 00:23:25,040 --> 00:23:28,760 Speaker 1: use a double elise bos so they had double sided dildos, 369 00:23:28,800 --> 00:23:31,360 Speaker 1: like as far back as the thirt hundreds, and this 370 00:23:31,440 --> 00:23:34,040 Speaker 1: was a stick made of water ivory with two silk 371 00:23:34,119 --> 00:23:37,320 Speaker 1: bands attached to the middle. I guess you like pull 372 00:23:37,359 --> 00:23:40,040 Speaker 1: on it? Yeah, well you need a grip, right, something 373 00:23:40,040 --> 00:23:43,320 Speaker 1: to grip on. That makes sense. So I assuming we 374 00:23:43,600 --> 00:23:46,560 Speaker 1: I haven't seen these this play, I've not. I don't 375 00:23:46,600 --> 00:23:49,240 Speaker 1: think there's been mounted in a while. Hasn't been mounted? 376 00:23:51,240 --> 00:23:58,239 Speaker 1: Is it? Is it double sided? Like? Like? Yeah? They 377 00:23:58,960 --> 00:24:02,960 Speaker 1: were saying in this the in this uh book about them, 378 00:24:03,560 --> 00:24:08,520 Speaker 1: the main writers that female homosexuality was very common and 379 00:24:08,720 --> 00:24:13,359 Speaker 1: considered to be a fine, normal thing, no problem ladies 380 00:24:13,440 --> 00:24:18,000 Speaker 1: have at but male homosexuality was very frowned upon at 381 00:24:18,000 --> 00:24:20,119 Speaker 1: the same time, which is so interesting to me, the 382 00:24:20,200 --> 00:24:25,320 Speaker 1: gendered wells about homosexuality. It's interesting because there was also, 383 00:24:25,600 --> 00:24:28,280 Speaker 1: especially in the upper class, there was a uh, some 384 00:24:28,440 --> 00:24:32,720 Speaker 1: pretty distinct sharp lines around gender division. Right, so you 385 00:24:32,800 --> 00:24:37,119 Speaker 1: could end up being, you know, some wine of noble birth, 386 00:24:37,160 --> 00:24:40,280 Speaker 1: and you're you're not gonna meet a lot of dudes 387 00:24:40,720 --> 00:24:44,199 Speaker 1: who are not, you know, either working for you or 388 00:24:45,680 --> 00:24:49,280 Speaker 1: or your relatives. So maybe how far historically, is this 389 00:24:49,440 --> 00:24:57,000 Speaker 1: after ancient Greek? And ancient said it's a long time. Yeah, 390 00:24:57,000 --> 00:24:59,600 Speaker 1: because I mean, like you know, in those in those days, 391 00:24:58,880 --> 00:25:02,679 Speaker 1: the moment, I mean it was like almost like like cool, 392 00:25:03,000 --> 00:25:06,439 Speaker 1: not cool to be by or by curious or have 393 00:25:06,520 --> 00:25:11,919 Speaker 1: like a stable being penetrated. You had to be a 394 00:25:12,000 --> 00:25:14,840 Speaker 1: tops only, which is so funny because if everyone is 395 00:25:14,880 --> 00:25:18,040 Speaker 1: a top, then where were they putting it? By the way, guys, 396 00:25:19,480 --> 00:25:21,760 Speaker 1: what's a power? Bottom? Somebody explained to me, what a power? 397 00:25:22,840 --> 00:25:30,080 Speaker 1: Have you not seen this explanation? Okay, I'll just maybe 398 00:25:30,200 --> 00:25:34,200 Speaker 1: maybe some ridiculous romantics. We'll get a we'll get an 399 00:25:34,240 --> 00:25:39,120 Speaker 1: answering machine on a later episode. Yeah, but it wasn't 400 00:25:39,200 --> 00:25:44,080 Speaker 1: just vegetables and fruit that people used. Um. Speaking of 401 00:25:44,119 --> 00:25:49,600 Speaker 1: ancient Greece. In a book called The Joy of Sexist Love, 402 00:25:49,720 --> 00:25:52,920 Speaker 1: Less Lust, Love and Longing in the Ancient World by 403 00:25:53,000 --> 00:26:01,240 Speaker 1: Vicky Leon, breadstick dildos were a common thing. Were the bottomless? No, 404 00:26:01,720 --> 00:26:09,040 Speaker 1: they all found the bottom? I think, yeah, I don't 405 00:26:09,080 --> 00:26:13,399 Speaker 1: think any of us absolute. Okay, So first off, I 406 00:26:13,400 --> 00:26:18,480 Speaker 1: always shout to Larry David, but the crumbs, right like croms, 407 00:26:18,760 --> 00:26:22,320 Speaker 1: This is my first question exact. Plus, I guess you 408 00:26:22,359 --> 00:26:24,160 Speaker 1: have to have enough bread that you would let one 409 00:26:24,240 --> 00:26:27,520 Speaker 1: sit by get stale enough to do the job. Plus 410 00:26:28,440 --> 00:26:31,240 Speaker 1: plus I'm thinking you bust out the olive oil and 411 00:26:31,280 --> 00:26:33,520 Speaker 1: there's a and there's a loaf of bread. I'm not 412 00:26:33,560 --> 00:26:36,119 Speaker 1: I'm not gonna do anything, but immediately it's gonna be 413 00:26:36,160 --> 00:26:42,840 Speaker 1: gone black pepper in there. Yeah, yeah, no, I wouldn't. 414 00:26:42,880 --> 00:26:47,359 Speaker 1: It's food is just gonna come before sex for me. Also, 415 00:26:47,560 --> 00:26:50,840 Speaker 1: I have a real um not phobia, but I'm just 416 00:26:50,880 --> 00:26:54,119 Speaker 1: sort of squigged out a little bit by incorporating food 417 00:26:54,160 --> 00:26:56,760 Speaker 1: stuffs into sex stuff. Say, I just don't think the 418 00:26:56,800 --> 00:26:59,240 Speaker 1: twain should should meet. Like I don't even like like 419 00:26:59,240 --> 00:27:02,840 Speaker 1: like sexy rawberry use that's just no, just yeah, don't 420 00:27:02,880 --> 00:27:05,800 Speaker 1: care like inviting ants to hang out in your bedroom 421 00:27:06,760 --> 00:27:10,040 Speaker 1: and he's already going to be stickiness eventually anyway, But 422 00:27:10,080 --> 00:27:11,720 Speaker 1: that's how you know it's over. You don't want sticking 423 00:27:11,760 --> 00:27:16,120 Speaker 1: this in advance, how you know we're dead. Oh man. 424 00:27:16,359 --> 00:27:19,240 Speaker 1: I also don't like the idea of putting yeast anywhere 425 00:27:19,240 --> 00:27:27,879 Speaker 1: near your vagina to the issues down there. But apparently 426 00:27:28,040 --> 00:27:31,439 Speaker 1: this happened when at an ancient bakery, when quote a 427 00:27:31,520 --> 00:27:34,639 Speaker 1: gal with time on her hands started full around with 428 00:27:34,680 --> 00:27:42,440 Speaker 1: bread dough for like a loose woman hands right while 429 00:27:42,560 --> 00:27:48,240 Speaker 1: listiviously daydreaming. She created an ossbo colics, the bread stick dildo, 430 00:27:48,560 --> 00:27:54,800 Speaker 1: the sex industry's first green product. Well done, very important 431 00:27:54,840 --> 00:27:58,480 Speaker 1: to be sustainable in our sex toy expliration. I'm sure 432 00:27:58,480 --> 00:28:03,960 Speaker 1: that was your primary con cern thousands of years. Yeah, 433 00:28:05,000 --> 00:28:09,119 Speaker 1: people are gonna go plastic waste. I'm onto something. You 434 00:28:09,119 --> 00:28:13,480 Speaker 1: guys are calling me weird, but just wait one day, 435 00:28:13,560 --> 00:28:15,240 Speaker 1: we're going to want to get power from the sun. 436 00:28:17,560 --> 00:28:21,879 Speaker 1: So yeah, this is this is uh fascinating because it 437 00:28:22,000 --> 00:28:25,640 Speaker 1: sounds like it caught on and became kind of a 438 00:28:25,680 --> 00:28:31,000 Speaker 1: cottage industry, at least in ancient Athens. Uh. Yeah, there 439 00:28:31,119 --> 00:28:34,640 Speaker 1: was a There was a note from that interview that 440 00:28:34,720 --> 00:28:37,760 Speaker 1: Leon did with the Huffington Post where she answered a 441 00:28:37,920 --> 00:28:40,640 Speaker 1: question that I was a little too hesitant to ask 442 00:28:40,760 --> 00:28:44,320 Speaker 1: because I'm one of the more immature people in today's conversation. 443 00:28:45,920 --> 00:28:51,600 Speaker 1: What happens to the bread after yes, you sell it 444 00:28:51,600 --> 00:28:54,520 Speaker 1: for half price obviously, or you sell it for the 445 00:28:54,560 --> 00:28:59,080 Speaker 1: price okay on fans. You could probably sell it for 446 00:29:00,080 --> 00:29:02,959 Speaker 1: some weird Greek guy out there. It's like, I'm that 447 00:29:03,000 --> 00:29:06,760 Speaker 1: bread were always selling their used underwear and there's someone 448 00:29:06,840 --> 00:29:09,680 Speaker 1: for some crazy shit. You know. That's the thing. There's 449 00:29:09,720 --> 00:29:13,800 Speaker 1: always what did you say? Oh did they leon said? 450 00:29:14,040 --> 00:29:17,360 Speaker 1: These breadsticks were these oldest most colleagues excuse me? Were 451 00:29:17,400 --> 00:29:22,240 Speaker 1: a custom made to fit and quote even nutritious. Should 452 00:29:22,320 --> 00:29:27,320 Speaker 1: the need arise? Should a different need arise? Yeah, it's 453 00:29:27,360 --> 00:29:33,960 Speaker 1: sort of like an elegal bread yeah, functional in edible 454 00:29:35,480 --> 00:29:39,880 Speaker 1: nutritious though, well bread my question. I mean that's a 455 00:29:40,240 --> 00:29:46,040 Speaker 1: that's a very broad term, you know, like a multi grain. 456 00:29:46,160 --> 00:29:48,720 Speaker 1: So there was some kind of friction. Yeah, sure, sure, 457 00:29:49,080 --> 00:29:52,760 Speaker 1: with or without rise seeds. Dr Ruth is probably this 458 00:29:52,800 --> 00:29:55,160 Speaker 1: I'm gonna go with. Well, it depends do you want 459 00:29:55,160 --> 00:29:57,280 Speaker 1: it ribbed for her pleasure? And maybe that's what the 460 00:29:57,400 --> 00:30:02,080 Speaker 1: rides there. You Yeah, there's a reference to using dildos 461 00:30:02,120 --> 00:30:04,680 Speaker 1: in the playlist is Strata, which is about women who 462 00:30:04,760 --> 00:30:07,240 Speaker 1: go on a sex strike to stop a warm So 463 00:30:07,400 --> 00:30:10,840 Speaker 1: they definitely I wonder if they ever used Baggett's and like, 464 00:30:11,520 --> 00:30:13,880 Speaker 1: I kind of want to do a production now they're like, well, 465 00:30:14,040 --> 00:30:16,560 Speaker 1: I got we're all set over here. Well, the war 466 00:30:16,680 --> 00:30:20,280 Speaker 1: is going terribly, but our grain industry is just dominating. 467 00:30:22,040 --> 00:30:24,360 Speaker 1: Time for a teeny weeny commercial break. We will be 468 00:30:24,520 --> 00:30:32,560 Speaker 1: right back welcome back to the show, everybody. Okay, I 469 00:30:32,640 --> 00:30:36,200 Speaker 1: got I'll stop going back to the weird idea that 470 00:30:36,360 --> 00:30:38,880 Speaker 1: people have to have quote sperm injections to not go 471 00:30:39,040 --> 00:30:42,840 Speaker 1: crazy because there's there's no sperm involved obviously, right with 472 00:30:43,480 --> 00:30:45,960 Speaker 1: I mean, I'm not a baker, but okay, yeah, just 473 00:30:46,880 --> 00:30:49,360 Speaker 1: but I suppose if you made like a Neclaire, you 474 00:30:49,440 --> 00:30:55,440 Speaker 1: know there might be something there for a boy that's 475 00:30:55,480 --> 00:30:57,720 Speaker 1: my nickname. I said it was cream Field. I didn't 476 00:30:57,760 --> 00:31:00,560 Speaker 1: tell you what kind of cream I did sell you. 477 00:31:00,720 --> 00:31:07,520 Speaker 1: No refunds and you're welcome. So we're we're looking. I 478 00:31:07,600 --> 00:31:09,960 Speaker 1: think it's safe to say that, like what we're already 479 00:31:10,000 --> 00:31:17,640 Speaker 1: seeing is a long established pattern of people, honestly, people 480 00:31:18,000 --> 00:31:21,640 Speaker 1: taking some agency for themselves, and people say I don't 481 00:31:21,720 --> 00:31:25,640 Speaker 1: necessarily need another person and all that baggage that comes 482 00:31:25,760 --> 00:31:28,440 Speaker 1: with it. Uh. If I already know what I want? 483 00:31:29,000 --> 00:31:31,640 Speaker 1: Um right, and this this is a trend that content, 484 00:31:31,720 --> 00:31:37,160 Speaker 1: I gotta say spoiler alert, uh for everybody listening. I 485 00:31:37,480 --> 00:31:41,320 Speaker 1: am so excited to get to some poetry in a second, 486 00:31:41,400 --> 00:31:44,560 Speaker 1: because I'm like emotionally nine years old. But I think 487 00:31:44,640 --> 00:31:48,840 Speaker 1: we've got maybe just something, just another thing to add 488 00:31:48,920 --> 00:31:54,240 Speaker 1: in here beforehand, which is we've also established past the 489 00:31:54,400 --> 00:31:59,880 Speaker 1: world of like so past the ancient world. When we're 490 00:32:00,000 --> 00:32:02,480 Speaker 1: talking about a lot of this stuff, we're talking about 491 00:32:02,520 --> 00:32:05,040 Speaker 1: people who are probably considered to be people of means. 492 00:32:05,400 --> 00:32:08,480 Speaker 1: I mean, history itself as we know it is is 493 00:32:08,560 --> 00:32:11,560 Speaker 1: kind of inherently a history of the literate class, because 494 00:32:11,600 --> 00:32:16,520 Speaker 1: they're the ones who could write. So are I guess 495 00:32:16,560 --> 00:32:18,160 Speaker 1: what I'm asking? I'm not sure how to freeze this 496 00:32:18,920 --> 00:32:23,040 Speaker 1: what we're rich people doing at this point, Like they 497 00:32:23,080 --> 00:32:33,240 Speaker 1: weren't using bread, that's what the servants were for. No, 498 00:32:33,440 --> 00:32:35,760 Speaker 1: but you're so right they I don't think they used 499 00:32:35,760 --> 00:32:39,160 Speaker 1: as many root vegetables and stuff because they had money 500 00:32:39,280 --> 00:32:42,680 Speaker 1: to pay for nice things and um. By the time 501 00:32:42,720 --> 00:32:46,600 Speaker 1: of the Renaissance, rich folks had Dildo's custom made from 502 00:32:46,760 --> 00:32:51,840 Speaker 1: silver and ivory and gold and other like precious materials. 503 00:32:52,680 --> 00:32:56,400 Speaker 1: So they had like I mean, very valuable sex toys 504 00:32:56,600 --> 00:33:00,920 Speaker 1: in their possession and probably beautifully decorated. Did don't you 505 00:33:00,960 --> 00:33:03,320 Speaker 1: think oh you I would think that, yeah, because you're 506 00:33:03,320 --> 00:33:06,719 Speaker 1: showing them off to the neighbors right herself in your 507 00:33:06,760 --> 00:33:09,880 Speaker 1: bedroom and you're like, hick, this one has is adorned 508 00:33:09,920 --> 00:33:15,000 Speaker 1: with garne. There's a certain element of keeping up with 509 00:33:15,120 --> 00:33:22,720 Speaker 1: the Joneses of course the sex toys aium. I think 510 00:33:22,760 --> 00:33:26,080 Speaker 1: I really skip this period in history already, but I 511 00:33:26,200 --> 00:33:27,840 Speaker 1: just wanted to mention something that I though I ran 512 00:33:27,880 --> 00:33:31,440 Speaker 1: across um in terms of like what the rich we're doing. Uh, 513 00:33:32,200 --> 00:33:34,600 Speaker 1: there's a rumor. I think it's backed up with with 514 00:33:34,680 --> 00:33:39,840 Speaker 1: actual findings, archaeological findings. But apparently Cleopatra would use like 515 00:33:40,000 --> 00:33:45,640 Speaker 1: a papyrus box full of live bees as like first analog. 516 00:33:47,480 --> 00:33:50,200 Speaker 1: I saw a hollow gourd that she filled with bees 517 00:33:50,280 --> 00:33:53,400 Speaker 1: and that was the first legend says that was the 518 00:33:53,480 --> 00:33:56,520 Speaker 1: first vibrator um, which I have never wanted to get 519 00:33:56,560 --> 00:33:59,520 Speaker 1: off enough to put live bees anywhere close to my body. 520 00:33:59,600 --> 00:34:07,840 Speaker 1: But if okay, seriously high road people, Diana, geez, Cleopatra 521 00:34:08,960 --> 00:34:11,680 Speaker 1: it was a different world. She had different things available 522 00:34:11,719 --> 00:34:17,399 Speaker 1: to her, different available so true, Well, what mean yeah 523 00:34:19,960 --> 00:34:23,799 Speaker 1: for words? You like? If you feel a loss for words, 524 00:34:23,840 --> 00:34:27,200 Speaker 1: I think you have perfect timing, my friend, because we're 525 00:34:27,320 --> 00:34:31,719 Speaker 1: finally getting to a little bit of poetry. And what 526 00:34:31,800 --> 00:34:35,480 Speaker 1: I love about this kind of poetry is that, just 527 00:34:35,760 --> 00:34:40,200 Speaker 1: like Beethoven's really dirty songs about farting and stuff, it 528 00:34:40,360 --> 00:34:44,080 Speaker 1: proves that people back then we're not really different from 529 00:34:44,160 --> 00:34:48,320 Speaker 1: people today. Uh and yeah, in school we read about 530 00:34:48,640 --> 00:34:52,640 Speaker 1: we read about the the high flutine, noble stuff. But 531 00:34:52,800 --> 00:34:58,120 Speaker 1: I think I think sometimes we miss just how potty 532 00:34:58,239 --> 00:35:02,040 Speaker 1: humor the human population news. I kind of compare it 533 00:35:02,080 --> 00:35:05,120 Speaker 1: to like, you think your dad didn't look at porn, 534 00:35:05,560 --> 00:35:15,239 Speaker 1: but he definitely looked at porn and his father and 535 00:35:15,480 --> 00:35:19,440 Speaker 1: on and on. I mean, that's very true. I think 536 00:35:19,480 --> 00:35:22,239 Speaker 1: that's an interesting thing about history is remembering that people 537 00:35:22,360 --> 00:35:27,440 Speaker 1: loved to have sex, people love to make jokes. I 538 00:35:27,520 --> 00:35:31,680 Speaker 1: remember listening to a Noble Blood episode that podcast Noble 539 00:35:31,719 --> 00:35:34,560 Speaker 1: Blood is very good, and she was talking about reading 540 00:35:35,080 --> 00:35:38,520 Speaker 1: some people. She was like, historians take this story really seriously, 541 00:35:38,840 --> 00:35:42,200 Speaker 1: as this like leader being a bit to her like whatever. 542 00:35:42,280 --> 00:35:45,600 Speaker 1: But she's like, it's actually clearly a practical joke. If 543 00:35:45,640 --> 00:35:47,520 Speaker 1: you look at it as a prank, it's just a 544 00:35:47,560 --> 00:35:49,480 Speaker 1: funny thing she was doing with her court. You have 545 00:35:49,560 --> 00:35:52,480 Speaker 1: to remember that people did did play jokes on each 546 00:35:52,520 --> 00:35:55,080 Speaker 1: other back in the day where fully stoic all the 547 00:35:55,160 --> 00:36:02,279 Speaker 1: time and winning wars or whatever. But yes, speaking of etymology, 548 00:36:02,600 --> 00:36:06,040 Speaker 1: I know you're an etymology fan, Nol, but the actual 549 00:36:06,640 --> 00:36:10,280 Speaker 1: word I do love etymology myself, but the word dildo 550 00:36:10,840 --> 00:36:15,520 Speaker 1: came from our friends, the Italians. Thank you, Thank you Italy. 551 00:36:16,200 --> 00:36:19,640 Speaker 1: If it came from the word do letto, meaning to delight, 552 00:36:22,080 --> 00:36:25,960 Speaker 1: makes sense, slide and glide and delight the three things. 553 00:36:27,480 --> 00:36:30,640 Speaker 1: The double D sound is always just a fun it's 554 00:36:30,640 --> 00:36:33,680 Speaker 1: a delight to say dildo. It sounds like like a real, 555 00:36:34,040 --> 00:36:38,480 Speaker 1: real silly goofy thing. Yeah, and I've got to ask, 556 00:36:38,560 --> 00:36:42,360 Speaker 1: so uh beat behind the curtain folks for years, always 557 00:36:42,400 --> 00:36:45,040 Speaker 1: trying to convince our bosses to let me do an 558 00:36:45,080 --> 00:36:48,239 Speaker 1: etymology show right in and tell them we should uh 559 00:36:48,400 --> 00:36:50,319 Speaker 1: and that the four of us will do it. I'm 560 00:36:50,520 --> 00:36:54,080 Speaker 1: volunteering everybody here. We need your help. But this reminds 561 00:36:54,160 --> 00:36:59,919 Speaker 1: me another another word that came into English usage from 562 00:37:00,200 --> 00:37:05,160 Speaker 1: Italian is uh dilettante, And I think it has the 563 00:37:05,360 --> 00:37:11,440 Speaker 1: same ultimate route right to do. So my question is, 564 00:37:11,560 --> 00:37:14,560 Speaker 1: even though now we call dilatant, you know, we call 565 00:37:14,640 --> 00:37:18,279 Speaker 1: the definition a lover of the arts or whatever. Um, 566 00:37:20,320 --> 00:37:23,160 Speaker 1: did it mean dildo people in the beginning A lover 567 00:37:23,280 --> 00:37:27,920 Speaker 1: of the dildos? It's people who had way too many 568 00:37:28,000 --> 00:37:32,239 Speaker 1: in their dildo orium whatever, Like she has a whole 569 00:37:32,320 --> 00:37:36,439 Speaker 1: other room. Guys, why would I needlock? I don't even 570 00:37:36,520 --> 00:37:40,239 Speaker 1: have ad dildo let alone, MANI it would accommodate an 571 00:37:40,400 --> 00:37:45,040 Speaker 1: entire rack. We'll be adding another wing onto the palace. 572 00:37:47,960 --> 00:37:52,920 Speaker 1: But yeah, we have a really wonderful, hilarious body poem 573 00:37:53,680 --> 00:37:58,840 Speaker 1: about kind of about the Italian influence here. It was 574 00:37:58,920 --> 00:38:02,000 Speaker 1: by John Wilma, who was the second Earl of Rochester, 575 00:38:02,120 --> 00:38:05,000 Speaker 1: and he was apparently well known for his lewd poetry 576 00:38:05,080 --> 00:38:08,279 Speaker 1: that he would write. And um, we pulled out some 577 00:38:08,440 --> 00:38:12,480 Speaker 1: select verses from kind of a long poem called signor 578 00:38:12,640 --> 00:38:18,800 Speaker 1: Dildo that he wrote. That's that's Mr Dildo, right Di Dildo. 579 00:38:19,160 --> 00:38:22,200 Speaker 1: So yeah, I say, let's head on down to poetry 580 00:38:22,320 --> 00:38:27,799 Speaker 1: corner and here signor Dildo by John Wilmot. You would 581 00:38:27,840 --> 00:38:31,040 Speaker 1: take him at first for no person of note, because 582 00:38:31,120 --> 00:38:34,840 Speaker 1: he appears in a plain leather coat. But when you 583 00:38:35,320 --> 00:38:40,760 Speaker 1: his virtuous abilities, no you'll fall down and worship Signor Dildo. 584 00:38:41,760 --> 00:38:45,960 Speaker 1: My lady South ask heaven prosper her fort. First clothed 585 00:38:46,040 --> 00:38:48,920 Speaker 1: him in satin, then brought him to court, but his 586 00:38:49,080 --> 00:38:53,160 Speaker 1: head in the circle he scarcely durst show so modest 587 00:38:53,239 --> 00:38:57,600 Speaker 1: a youth was Signor Dildo. The Countess of foul myth 588 00:38:57,960 --> 00:39:01,600 Speaker 1: of whom people tell of. It's been wear shirts of 589 00:39:01,719 --> 00:39:06,160 Speaker 1: a guinea and now might save that expense if she did. 590 00:39:06,280 --> 00:39:12,400 Speaker 1: But know her lustier swinger you signor del do whoa 591 00:39:14,160 --> 00:39:18,440 Speaker 1: the pattern of virtue, Her grace of Cleveland has swallowed 592 00:39:18,560 --> 00:39:23,200 Speaker 1: more bricks than the ocean has slant rhyme right there, 593 00:39:23,200 --> 00:39:34,399 Speaker 1: I gotta get in. Credit has said Cleveland has sat. 594 00:39:35,600 --> 00:39:39,800 Speaker 1: But by rubbing and scrubbing so wide does it grow? 595 00:39:40,800 --> 00:39:44,560 Speaker 1: It is fit for just nothing. But the Senora Dilda 596 00:39:46,160 --> 00:39:50,440 Speaker 1: our dainty fine duchesses have got a trick to dote 597 00:39:50,560 --> 00:39:53,400 Speaker 1: on a fool for the sake of his brick. The 598 00:39:53,600 --> 00:39:57,799 Speaker 1: fops were undone, did their graces, but no the discretion 599 00:39:57,960 --> 00:40:03,320 Speaker 1: and the vigor of signor dildo. This senior is sound 600 00:40:03,600 --> 00:40:08,800 Speaker 1: safe ready and dumb as ever was candle, carrot or 601 00:40:09,000 --> 00:40:13,399 Speaker 1: thumb been away with these nasty devices, and show how 602 00:40:13,640 --> 00:40:19,120 Speaker 1: you rate the just merit of seeing your dildo? Beautiful, 603 00:40:19,239 --> 00:40:22,359 Speaker 1: beautiful beautiful. So I want to point out just two things, 604 00:40:22,440 --> 00:40:25,879 Speaker 1: real quick. First, dumb in that last first great read 605 00:40:25,960 --> 00:40:31,840 Speaker 1: everybody wait three things, um. Second, dumb in this sense 606 00:40:31,960 --> 00:40:36,600 Speaker 1: most likely just means silent, but it works, it works 607 00:40:36,719 --> 00:40:43,719 Speaker 1: very well. Yeah, congratulations himbo. So I also I don't 608 00:40:43,760 --> 00:40:46,560 Speaker 1: think We said this in the beginning as we were 609 00:40:46,560 --> 00:40:51,240 Speaker 1: excited about talking about this off air. Um Diana Eli. 610 00:40:52,120 --> 00:40:56,040 Speaker 1: This is not the full poem. These are excerpts. Have 611 00:40:56,160 --> 00:40:59,400 Speaker 1: it in the notes as select versus from this poem. 612 00:40:59,760 --> 00:41:03,600 Speaker 1: My question is how long is this book? Is? Just 613 00:41:03,760 --> 00:41:09,680 Speaker 1: like also exactly, I had nothing else to do. So 614 00:41:09,800 --> 00:41:11,640 Speaker 1: this ship went on for like I think it was 615 00:41:11,760 --> 00:41:16,680 Speaker 1: like eighteen or nineteen stands any name dropped so many 616 00:41:16,760 --> 00:41:18,719 Speaker 1: people and I'm like, I hope they're real, Like were 617 00:41:18,760 --> 00:41:22,920 Speaker 1: they here listening? Like are you trying to say that 618 00:41:23,400 --> 00:41:26,640 Speaker 1: I have swallowed more pricks than the ocean has sand? 619 00:41:26,880 --> 00:41:30,160 Speaker 1: So specifically people, well, this is I don't know if 620 00:41:30,200 --> 00:41:33,480 Speaker 1: they're real people, but I think so. I think I 621 00:41:33,560 --> 00:41:37,480 Speaker 1: think he is at least referring some because this happened 622 00:41:37,480 --> 00:41:41,359 Speaker 1: a lot in uh In in aristocratic circles. They would 623 00:41:41,400 --> 00:41:45,879 Speaker 1: write stuff that are roasty kind of like they would 624 00:41:46,000 --> 00:41:48,920 Speaker 1: they would be writing stuff that's like, you know, they 625 00:41:49,040 --> 00:41:51,160 Speaker 1: put a different name on it, but everybody knew who 626 00:41:51,239 --> 00:41:54,480 Speaker 1: you meant. You know, you meant that slutty chick over there, 627 00:41:54,840 --> 00:41:57,279 Speaker 1: you know, yeah exactly. So it was always like some 628 00:41:57,719 --> 00:42:02,680 Speaker 1: unders some shade, and he was trying to one thing 629 00:42:02,719 --> 00:42:05,040 Speaker 1: I love about this style of poetry is it's so 630 00:42:05,920 --> 00:42:10,160 Speaker 1: smug and self satisfied, like just like I'm gonna do 631 00:42:10,280 --> 00:42:12,440 Speaker 1: the thing again, like at the end of it. You know, 632 00:42:12,560 --> 00:42:15,480 Speaker 1: it's just like, yeah, like the fact that there's like 633 00:42:15,840 --> 00:42:17,880 Speaker 1: the fact that there's so many more stands us than 634 00:42:17,960 --> 00:42:20,439 Speaker 1: this that we left out just hammers that home even 635 00:42:20,520 --> 00:42:28,000 Speaker 1: for right on the head. I am just so delightfully 636 00:42:28,160 --> 00:42:32,520 Speaker 1: body and uh and hilarious. That's what this guy's Oh yeah, 637 00:42:32,680 --> 00:42:35,880 Speaker 1: he was very proud of this poem. I'm sure very 638 00:42:35,920 --> 00:42:38,400 Speaker 1: excited to share with all the ladies that he was 639 00:42:38,440 --> 00:42:41,800 Speaker 1: talking about it, like, hey, I put you in my poem. 640 00:42:42,160 --> 00:42:44,960 Speaker 1: Oh my god, thank you? What man, you never read 641 00:42:45,040 --> 00:42:48,960 Speaker 1: it first? Should come to the show. I also wonder 642 00:42:49,000 --> 00:42:51,719 Speaker 1: if the Countess of Falmouth was like, oh, so I 643 00:42:51,800 --> 00:42:54,240 Speaker 1: don't have to funck my footman and give him nice stuff. 644 00:42:54,400 --> 00:42:57,319 Speaker 1: I could just get me a little toy to put 645 00:42:57,400 --> 00:43:02,799 Speaker 1: in the house. This this is also this is where 646 00:43:02,840 --> 00:43:05,439 Speaker 1: we see like a turn. So it's widely accepted, even 647 00:43:05,480 --> 00:43:09,640 Speaker 1: though it might be a little edgy. Right. Uh, this 648 00:43:09,760 --> 00:43:13,440 Speaker 1: guy's doing insult comedy tail as old as time, right Uh, 649 00:43:14,000 --> 00:43:17,280 Speaker 1: but as as you guys have been telling us before. 650 00:43:17,960 --> 00:43:22,640 Speaker 1: Eventually there was there was a time where guys started 651 00:43:22,680 --> 00:43:26,919 Speaker 1: to promote h dudes, I mean specifically started to associate, 652 00:43:27,719 --> 00:43:30,160 Speaker 1: but they ran a smear campaign against still those right, 653 00:43:30,160 --> 00:43:33,800 Speaker 1: it's promiscurity, it's a v D. But at the same time, 654 00:43:35,080 --> 00:43:40,000 Speaker 1: for the entire time, dudes had their their own toys, 655 00:43:40,280 --> 00:43:43,239 Speaker 1: right and uh, Eli, I'm just I'm gonna have to 656 00:43:43,320 --> 00:43:46,560 Speaker 1: go hashtag no pun left behind because it's sincere. When 657 00:43:46,600 --> 00:43:48,560 Speaker 1: you at the very top of the show said male 658 00:43:48,640 --> 00:43:51,200 Speaker 1: insecurity because it's been a long day for me, I 659 00:43:51,280 --> 00:43:57,279 Speaker 1: thought you met a male hyphen I n space security. Yeah. 660 00:43:57,400 --> 00:43:58,880 Speaker 1: I don't know what to do with that pun, but 661 00:43:58,960 --> 00:44:00,680 Speaker 1: I don't want to leave it out in the cold. 662 00:44:01,160 --> 00:44:10,239 Speaker 1: So yeah, yeah, like a guard, some guard who can't uh, 663 00:44:10,560 --> 00:44:15,160 Speaker 1: you know many securities. Will belos romantics help us out. 664 00:44:15,239 --> 00:44:19,239 Speaker 1: Just explain that punt to us, the punt. So, uh, 665 00:44:19,760 --> 00:44:22,160 Speaker 1: this is fascinating because we haven't talked about something that, 666 00:44:22,800 --> 00:44:25,960 Speaker 1: uh is apparently quite popular. I feel weird saying it. 667 00:44:26,000 --> 00:44:28,000 Speaker 1: I feel like my mom's gonna come back and find 668 00:44:28,040 --> 00:44:31,239 Speaker 1: me if I say this. Cock rings yeah, oh god, 669 00:44:33,360 --> 00:44:37,640 Speaker 1: but they're old to dude. My favorite I do one 670 00:44:37,640 --> 00:44:41,200 Speaker 1: of my favorite Mr Show sketches like a fake commercial. 671 00:44:41,560 --> 00:44:45,320 Speaker 1: It's like cock Rane warehouse. Any cock will do, but 672 00:44:45,400 --> 00:44:47,640 Speaker 1: they're like so bored that they're like, come on down 673 00:44:47,760 --> 00:44:52,359 Speaker 1: to the Cockrane, the cock Rane new and used, cock 674 00:44:52,480 --> 00:44:56,800 Speaker 1: Ran vintage. Yeah, I like it. I love that. It's hilarious, 675 00:44:57,320 --> 00:45:01,160 Speaker 1: it's fantastic. But yeah, they are act pretty old school 676 00:45:01,280 --> 00:45:03,439 Speaker 1: cock rings. They have been around for a long time. 677 00:45:04,120 --> 00:45:06,800 Speaker 1: Um part partly, I guess because of that male in security, 678 00:45:06,800 --> 00:45:09,360 Speaker 1: because they're supposed to help you achieve or keep an 679 00:45:09,400 --> 00:45:12,680 Speaker 1: erection for longer. So it's kind of part of I 680 00:45:12,760 --> 00:45:14,600 Speaker 1: guess that where they're like I need something to like 681 00:45:14,800 --> 00:45:23,200 Speaker 1: make sure UM given her the goods about edging where 682 00:45:23,239 --> 00:45:25,680 Speaker 1: you're sort of keeping yourself, it's almost like a tantric 683 00:45:25,719 --> 00:45:27,800 Speaker 1: thing where you're sort of like holding back, you know, 684 00:45:27,960 --> 00:45:31,919 Speaker 1: you're trying to not you know, climax in two point 685 00:45:32,000 --> 00:45:35,200 Speaker 1: five seconds, trying to give it some time. There's a 686 00:45:35,239 --> 00:45:38,480 Speaker 1: book called The Book of Kink Sex Beyond the Missionary 687 00:45:38,640 --> 00:45:42,640 Speaker 1: by Ava Christina, and it says that in the Gin 688 00:45:42,840 --> 00:45:47,880 Speaker 1: and Song dynasties in China around a d D, they 689 00:45:47,920 --> 00:45:52,520 Speaker 1: would make cock rings out of a goat's eyelid because 690 00:45:52,560 --> 00:45:55,000 Speaker 1: it's already a circle of skin and then they would 691 00:45:55,040 --> 00:46:04,319 Speaker 1: leave the lashes on the like, can I just say 692 00:46:05,200 --> 00:46:08,160 Speaker 1: the things we've done to goats on this show, and 693 00:46:08,400 --> 00:46:10,719 Speaker 1: even when we went on your show last time for 694 00:46:10,840 --> 00:46:14,920 Speaker 1: Valentine's Day, as we put goats through Yeah, there's some 695 00:46:15,400 --> 00:46:18,239 Speaker 1: goat vivisection involved in one of those rituals that we 696 00:46:18,320 --> 00:46:20,600 Speaker 1: talked about. It was it was the goat skins. They 697 00:46:20,600 --> 00:46:25,600 Speaker 1: would We had a guy marry a goat in a 698 00:46:25,719 --> 00:46:29,719 Speaker 1: recent episode that we talked about that. But yeah, that 699 00:46:29,840 --> 00:46:32,680 Speaker 1: we just we are we're putting goats through it. Yeah. Well, 700 00:46:32,760 --> 00:46:35,400 Speaker 1: it's part of a long history too of looking to 701 00:46:35,480 --> 00:46:37,880 Speaker 1: the natural world for things that are thought to in 702 00:46:38,000 --> 00:46:42,680 Speaker 1: one way or another enhanced sexual performance. Right, And even 703 00:46:42,800 --> 00:46:46,719 Speaker 1: that even exists today with the various different unproven or 704 00:46:46,840 --> 00:46:49,759 Speaker 1: disproven stories that say, hey, you know what, this thing 705 00:46:49,840 --> 00:46:54,600 Speaker 1: is an aphrodisiac. I know it sounds crazy. Just let 706 00:46:54,719 --> 00:46:57,000 Speaker 1: this guy slap you with a goat skin a couple 707 00:46:57,080 --> 00:47:00,160 Speaker 1: of times and then come back and thank me. Just 708 00:47:00,239 --> 00:47:04,840 Speaker 1: come back and this entire goats testicle, yeah, will imbute 709 00:47:04,880 --> 00:47:06,960 Speaker 1: you with the power of the Why is it always 710 00:47:07,000 --> 00:47:11,160 Speaker 1: the most disgusting, smelly, like unappetizing things that are like 711 00:47:11,280 --> 00:47:14,799 Speaker 1: this will really turn you on. They're like, otherwise it's trash. 712 00:47:14,880 --> 00:47:18,080 Speaker 1: I've got to make it a sex or something. Just 713 00:47:18,239 --> 00:47:22,040 Speaker 1: do tend push up today, you know, just well there's 714 00:47:22,040 --> 00:47:23,959 Speaker 1: a lot and they're like, no, I don't have time. 715 00:47:24,640 --> 00:47:27,840 Speaker 1: It's going down in the next room. Just give me 716 00:47:28,040 --> 00:47:33,080 Speaker 1: the goat give me the goat cock right now, you're 717 00:47:33,120 --> 00:47:34,440 Speaker 1: right to. I mean, like, I mean, I think I 718 00:47:34,800 --> 00:47:40,360 Speaker 1: love oysters, but they're obviously really unappetizing. It was it 719 00:47:40,520 --> 00:47:44,640 Speaker 1: was Hemingway said to me, like was very brave. Was 720 00:47:44,719 --> 00:47:47,320 Speaker 1: the man who first ate an oyster? You know, like 721 00:47:47,440 --> 00:47:51,640 Speaker 1: that's meant meant to be an effort. Yeah, I'm acquired 722 00:47:51,680 --> 00:47:53,880 Speaker 1: taste for sure. How does don't know about that? I 723 00:47:53,920 --> 00:47:55,520 Speaker 1: don't know if I need an oyster? I mean, like, 724 00:47:55,920 --> 00:47:58,960 Speaker 1: and I don't know. They say about garlic too, but 725 00:47:59,120 --> 00:48:01,480 Speaker 1: that's another one. I'm like, does anyone eat a bunch 726 00:48:01,520 --> 00:48:03,399 Speaker 1: of garlic and go yes? I can't wing to mash 727 00:48:03,480 --> 00:48:08,879 Speaker 1: my mouth up against hers. I smelled you across the room, 728 00:48:10,160 --> 00:48:14,880 Speaker 1: and I knew it was a cloud as well. So 729 00:48:15,320 --> 00:48:17,680 Speaker 1: you know, I'm a big believer in being honest and 730 00:48:17,760 --> 00:48:20,680 Speaker 1: transparent about learning, and I'm gonna go out and say it. 731 00:48:20,760 --> 00:48:23,360 Speaker 1: I don't care if I embarrassed myself. I did not 732 00:48:23,520 --> 00:48:26,239 Speaker 1: know that goat eyelash cock rings were a thing I 733 00:48:26,440 --> 00:48:29,920 Speaker 1: must have that I must have missed that day m P. 734 00:48:30,360 --> 00:48:34,480 Speaker 1: And I apologize to everyone. It was a whole day 735 00:48:34,520 --> 00:48:36,640 Speaker 1: of health class. I kept nudging you, but you were 736 00:48:36,680 --> 00:48:40,759 Speaker 1: sound asleep. How would you fall asleep during that last 737 00:48:42,400 --> 00:48:45,600 Speaker 1: So stayed away for the etymology, but not this? So 738 00:48:46,000 --> 00:48:49,000 Speaker 1: what we all? This also makes me think of um 739 00:48:50,040 --> 00:48:52,920 Speaker 1: things that people have done, and this I do know 740 00:48:53,000 --> 00:48:57,799 Speaker 1: about things people have done in pursuit of enhanced sexual pleasure. Uh, 741 00:48:58,680 --> 00:49:03,520 Speaker 1: including what I would call minor surgery, because yeah, guys, 742 00:49:03,880 --> 00:49:06,719 Speaker 1: we can say this as dude, We'll do a lot 743 00:49:06,800 --> 00:49:09,239 Speaker 1: of crazy stuff if they think it gives them just 744 00:49:09,480 --> 00:49:14,160 Speaker 1: an edge switch. Don't really you have this covered there, 745 00:49:14,320 --> 00:49:16,680 Speaker 1: But like you know, I mean the Prince Albert literally 746 00:49:16,960 --> 00:49:21,239 Speaker 1: was created by Prince Albert. You know, you know it's 747 00:49:21,239 --> 00:49:25,040 Speaker 1: obviously a piercing yeah, through the the through the urethra 748 00:49:25,239 --> 00:49:28,680 Speaker 1: and out the bottom of the of the head. It's 749 00:49:29,520 --> 00:49:35,840 Speaker 1: terrifying prospects not worth it, but I guess it is 750 00:49:36,080 --> 00:49:38,160 Speaker 1: for some I don't know. I don't know. I don't 751 00:49:38,200 --> 00:49:42,440 Speaker 1: want to yu anyone, but you know, these are some 752 00:49:42,520 --> 00:49:44,319 Speaker 1: of the ones that you found, Diane. I think are 753 00:49:44,320 --> 00:49:49,360 Speaker 1: maybe a little more like impermanent, yes, fortunately, but still painful. 754 00:49:49,440 --> 00:49:52,960 Speaker 1: I don't know. But yeah. There's this book called Woman 755 00:49:53,560 --> 00:50:00,160 Speaker 1: and Historical Gynecological and Anthropological Compendium from and it's by 756 00:50:00,239 --> 00:50:04,960 Speaker 1: Hermann Heinrich Ploss, Max Bartle's and Paul Bartle's and they 757 00:50:05,120 --> 00:50:08,200 Speaker 1: say that this goat eyelash cock ring thing may have 758 00:50:08,360 --> 00:50:11,279 Speaker 1: originated in the Indonesian Islands and not in China, so 759 00:50:11,440 --> 00:50:15,000 Speaker 1: that's a little bit in dispute. And they also noted 760 00:50:15,160 --> 00:50:19,399 Speaker 1: from various tribes worldwide sex aids like inserting a brass 761 00:50:19,600 --> 00:50:24,000 Speaker 1: wire into the penis or putting little gold and silver 762 00:50:24,200 --> 00:50:27,640 Speaker 1: beads under its head and then binding it up with 763 00:50:27,719 --> 00:50:30,200 Speaker 1: a bit of bird down to tickle the sex partner 764 00:50:30,280 --> 00:50:35,640 Speaker 1: at the same time. Okay, folks out, you wouldn't put 765 00:50:35,680 --> 00:50:38,920 Speaker 1: a silver ball on your penis for me. No, I 766 00:50:38,960 --> 00:50:40,640 Speaker 1: don't need to hesitate on that one. That's just a 767 00:50:40,640 --> 00:50:43,520 Speaker 1: flat Okay, that's fair. I wouldn't ask it of you 768 00:50:43,640 --> 00:50:47,320 Speaker 1: to be fair, but thank you. Um. Yeah, so that 769 00:50:47,520 --> 00:50:50,799 Speaker 1: was an option that you could do. Again, I think 770 00:50:50,840 --> 00:50:53,560 Speaker 1: that's a ribbed for her pleasure thing, trying to make 771 00:50:53,640 --> 00:50:57,279 Speaker 1: your dick more special, I guess, or something. I mean 772 00:50:57,400 --> 00:51:00,359 Speaker 1: sticking of brass. Why, I guess that's for rigidity, right, 773 00:51:00,440 --> 00:51:03,120 Speaker 1: we're thinking so you can kind of bend them into 774 00:51:03,160 --> 00:51:08,040 Speaker 1: shapes like a paper clip animal. Oh oh wow, like 775 00:51:08,160 --> 00:51:10,680 Speaker 1: a like a paper clip animal. Yeah, I can see 776 00:51:10,760 --> 00:51:14,239 Speaker 1: how that would be possible. But I'm having a tough 777 00:51:14,320 --> 00:51:16,560 Speaker 1: time with the motivation, you know what I mean, teach 778 00:51:16,600 --> 00:51:20,880 Speaker 1: the exactly teach. Yes, I don't know. There might be 779 00:51:20,920 --> 00:51:23,239 Speaker 1: some people out there with very fascinating little giraffes they've 780 00:51:23,280 --> 00:51:26,520 Speaker 1: built out of their dicks. Well, I guess I'll look 781 00:51:26,520 --> 00:51:29,359 Speaker 1: at a gallery of it, but not for long. Um, yeah, 782 00:51:30,160 --> 00:51:32,960 Speaker 1: well I would. I would think also then that aside 783 00:51:33,080 --> 00:51:37,320 Speaker 1: from those kind of traditions, we already see the idea 784 00:51:37,320 --> 00:51:40,560 Speaker 1: of wanting to be associated with wealth like gold and silver, 785 00:51:40,800 --> 00:51:44,879 Speaker 1: the beads, Um, But what about did they ever move 786 00:51:44,960 --> 00:51:48,239 Speaker 1: on from the goat eyelash thing? Like? How how much 787 00:51:48,320 --> 00:51:51,400 Speaker 1: of history have I missed? I guess I'm asking was 788 00:51:51,480 --> 00:51:54,560 Speaker 1: this almost just like a thing that you knew about? 789 00:51:54,680 --> 00:51:57,320 Speaker 1: Or like no, no, no, no, no, I mean definitely 790 00:51:57,360 --> 00:52:00,279 Speaker 1: I was aware that, Like I think early condoms were 791 00:52:00,360 --> 00:52:05,560 Speaker 1: made of sheep skin, But that's the that's the degree 792 00:52:05,640 --> 00:52:09,520 Speaker 1: to which I was aware of using animal flesh on 793 00:52:09,719 --> 00:52:12,480 Speaker 1: your member um. But then you know, then you get 794 00:52:12,520 --> 00:52:16,479 Speaker 1: into what was this the Burmese bell Burmese bells. That's 795 00:52:16,520 --> 00:52:20,040 Speaker 1: a kind of the next the next level of this, right. Yeah, 796 00:52:20,360 --> 00:52:23,359 Speaker 1: this is another really interesting one. And this one could 797 00:52:23,360 --> 00:52:26,759 Speaker 1: be placed either inside the vagina prior to sex or 798 00:52:27,120 --> 00:52:33,080 Speaker 1: in the penis um. I guess it was for sale goop. Yeah, yeah, 799 00:52:33,120 --> 00:52:36,080 Speaker 1: it's very good for your vaginal health. Um. But they 800 00:52:36,160 --> 00:52:41,000 Speaker 1: were called exertion bell or Burmese bells. And this again 801 00:52:41,080 --> 00:52:43,080 Speaker 1: we're in the Ming dynasty, so this is a lot 802 00:52:43,160 --> 00:52:47,319 Speaker 1: of ancient Chinese, uh, sex aids, I guess. And they 803 00:52:47,360 --> 00:52:51,240 Speaker 1: were kind of copper or gold bell or ball shaped 804 00:52:51,280 --> 00:52:55,680 Speaker 1: objects that contained the sperm of a mythical Burmese bird 805 00:52:56,160 --> 00:52:58,680 Speaker 1: and apparently had to catch the sperm with like a 806 00:52:58,800 --> 00:53:04,560 Speaker 1: fake woman made of raw. There's like a whole sounds complicated, Yeah, 807 00:53:04,680 --> 00:53:08,200 Speaker 1: a whole complicated process to getting this sperm. And the 808 00:53:08,360 --> 00:53:12,400 Speaker 1: Ching scholar Chaoy describes holding one of these in his 809 00:53:12,560 --> 00:53:15,640 Speaker 1: hand and he said, quote, I found that as soon 810 00:53:15,719 --> 00:53:18,279 Speaker 1: as it had become a little warm, it started to 811 00:53:18,400 --> 00:53:22,080 Speaker 1: move on its own account, and a tiny sound emanated 812 00:53:22,160 --> 00:53:24,120 Speaker 1: from it. As soon as I put it back on 813 00:53:24,200 --> 00:53:27,279 Speaker 1: the table, the sound ceased. Oh god, I hope the 814 00:53:27,360 --> 00:53:34,320 Speaker 1: sound was like, oh, that would be fun. It was like, 815 00:53:34,440 --> 00:53:38,200 Speaker 1: I know what you're about to do, baby. But that 816 00:53:38,280 --> 00:53:39,520 Speaker 1: was the one like the bees where I was like, 817 00:53:39,600 --> 00:53:43,240 Speaker 1: if something starts to jump around and make its own noise, 818 00:53:43,280 --> 00:53:45,839 Speaker 1: I feel like I would not put it inside my body. Yeah. 819 00:53:46,160 --> 00:53:49,040 Speaker 1: I didn't go there, Ben. I was immediately just thought 820 00:53:49,160 --> 00:53:58,520 Speaker 1: this sperm is haunted sperms the man, which some people 821 00:53:58,560 --> 00:54:02,359 Speaker 1: would be into. It's true. Hey, I think we've done 822 00:54:02,400 --> 00:54:07,160 Speaker 1: them on this very show, or we will. Holy cow, 823 00:54:07,360 --> 00:54:09,879 Speaker 1: I'm blushing. But also, you know, I learned a lot 824 00:54:10,280 --> 00:54:13,600 Speaker 1: about what a ride my body, which is a temple 825 00:54:13,719 --> 00:54:17,239 Speaker 1: but also apparently a playground it has been throughout history. Yeah, 826 00:54:17,480 --> 00:54:20,880 Speaker 1: I learned. I I candidly learned some stuff that I 827 00:54:21,000 --> 00:54:24,799 Speaker 1: can't unlearn. A lot of uh, I can't remember if 828 00:54:24,880 --> 00:54:26,799 Speaker 1: this is if we already got to this part one. 829 00:54:27,000 --> 00:54:29,120 Speaker 1: I think we did a lot of stuff about goats. 830 00:54:29,600 --> 00:54:33,520 Speaker 1: M hm. Yeah. Yeah, it's I mean, mental images that 831 00:54:33,640 --> 00:54:36,040 Speaker 1: I can't unsee, but I don't want to. I'm if 832 00:54:36,080 --> 00:54:38,320 Speaker 1: I'm forever changed by them, and I'm okay. With that, 833 00:54:38,560 --> 00:54:42,040 Speaker 1: you know what an experience? What what a wild ride? Well, 834 00:54:42,160 --> 00:54:45,960 Speaker 1: and this is only part one, I've got to say though, 835 00:54:46,040 --> 00:54:51,120 Speaker 1: I can't wait until Thursday when we get part two out. Yeah, 836 00:54:51,360 --> 00:54:54,279 Speaker 1: we're definitely gonna get it out there. Um. Sorry to 837 00:54:54,320 --> 00:54:58,520 Speaker 1: anyone who who this topic wasn't for you. UM, well, 838 00:54:58,560 --> 00:55:00,279 Speaker 1: we'll make it up to you next week with some 839 00:55:00,520 --> 00:55:04,920 Speaker 1: really really vanilla content, we promise, just kidding. We know 840 00:55:05,040 --> 00:55:07,200 Speaker 1: there's no prudes in the squad. There's no prudes in 841 00:55:07,280 --> 00:55:10,640 Speaker 1: the squad in the meantime, thanks to, of course, Vanilla 842 00:55:10,719 --> 00:55:13,800 Speaker 1: ice Cream, thanks to our one and only super producer, 843 00:55:13,880 --> 00:55:16,719 Speaker 1: the Man, the Myth, the Legend, Mr Max Williams, thanks 844 00:55:16,760 --> 00:55:20,560 Speaker 1: to Casey Pegs, Vanilla Ice, thanks to Vanilla Ice, thanks 845 00:55:20,600 --> 00:55:24,680 Speaker 1: to Millie Vanilli, thanks to our own Millie Vanilli. Uh, 846 00:55:24,800 --> 00:55:27,960 Speaker 1: the one Man, Millie Vanilli himself, Mr Jonathan Strickland ak 847 00:55:28,200 --> 00:55:30,440 Speaker 1: the Quister. What do you think about that Street Ban 848 00:55:30,719 --> 00:55:32,520 Speaker 1: Street Team? You know what they call him, the one 849 00:55:32,560 --> 00:55:35,560 Speaker 1: Man Millie Vanilly. Well, I mean he does not play 850 00:55:35,600 --> 00:55:38,360 Speaker 1: well with others, even if there's LIPSTI can involved, So 851 00:55:38,880 --> 00:55:41,440 Speaker 1: that's on him, I would say. Thanks to Alex Williams, 852 00:55:41,480 --> 00:55:43,960 Speaker 1: who composed this banging Bob that you're hearing in your 853 00:55:44,000 --> 00:55:47,040 Speaker 1: ears right this very second. Thanks to Christopher Haciots and Eaves, 854 00:55:47,080 --> 00:55:50,319 Speaker 1: Jeff Codes here in spirit uh and most importantly, Ben, 855 00:55:50,440 --> 00:55:53,960 Speaker 1: thanks thanks to you for this opportunity to go on 856 00:55:54,040 --> 00:55:56,319 Speaker 1: a raunchy ride together. It was a lot of fun 857 00:55:56,840 --> 00:55:59,320 Speaker 1: and there's more to come. Yeah, big, big thanks. Of 858 00:55:59,440 --> 00:56:02,560 Speaker 1: course we've said it several times, but can't say enough. 859 00:56:02,640 --> 00:56:06,879 Speaker 1: Big things to Eli and Diana Banks for making such 860 00:56:06,960 --> 00:56:11,239 Speaker 1: a wonderful show, Big things to everybody throughout history who 861 00:56:11,360 --> 00:56:15,520 Speaker 1: got horny enough to mcgiver and experience together for themselves. 862 00:56:16,120 --> 00:56:19,080 Speaker 1: And of course no huge thanks to you, matt Ah, 863 00:56:19,320 --> 00:56:21,120 Speaker 1: You're too kind of We'll see you next time. Books. 864 00:56:28,320 --> 00:56:30,400 Speaker 1: For more podcasts for my Heart Radio, visit the i 865 00:56:30,480 --> 00:56:33,360 Speaker 1: heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to 866 00:56:33,440 --> 00:56:34,320 Speaker 1: your favorite shows.