WEBVTT - Why You So Obsessed With Me

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<v Speaker 1>What's Up Tribe. I'm Erica and I'm Mila, and this

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<v Speaker 1>is Good Mom's Bad Choices Podcast Beach season two.

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<v Speaker 2>If you joined us for season one, you got three

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<v Speaker 2>hundred uncensored episodes.

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<v Speaker 1>But things are a little different in twenty twenty four.

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<v Speaker 1>Not only are we having new guests, new segments, but

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<v Speaker 1>we're going outside, y'all. We're getting out of our studio

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<v Speaker 1>and podcasting in the wild, So make sure you check

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<v Speaker 1>us out on YouTube to see where we're headed next.

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<v Speaker 2>This podcast is for all the good moms, all the

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<v Speaker 2>good dads, and even y'all hain't got no kids.

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<v Speaker 1>Pull up. Join us in season.

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<v Speaker 2>Two as we deep dive into even more uncensored topics

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<v Speaker 2>like love, sex.

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<v Speaker 1>Dating, and just look at this as the ultimate group chat.

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<v Speaker 1>All the shit you're afraid to say out loud or

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<v Speaker 1>even try, We say it and do it for you.

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<v Speaker 2>Because nothing's off limits here.

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<v Speaker 1>This is a judgment free zone to show up exactly

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<v Speaker 1>as you are, and let's be honest, we've all made

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<v Speaker 1>a few bad choices, so sit back, relax, and enjoy

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<v Speaker 1>the ride. Welcome back to Good Mom's Bad Choices. I'm

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<v Speaker 1>Erica and I'm Mila. Happy Wednesday, Happy hump Day. How

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<v Speaker 1>you doing. I'm good. We're back in the stew back

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<v Speaker 1>in the studio today.

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<v Speaker 2>We finally made it back to the studio. I didn't

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<v Speaker 2>think we'd ever come back, but here we are.

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<v Speaker 1>Have you guys been enjoying our Good Moms in the

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<v Speaker 1>Wild episodes. We've been doing a lot of more episodes

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<v Speaker 1>outside and it's a It's been a nice departure for us,

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<v Speaker 1>I think, to get out of the space and kind

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<v Speaker 1>of into our lives. Like really not just listening to

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<v Speaker 1>us talk about our lives, but like, hey, this is

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<v Speaker 1>what I do in the morning. I like to go

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<v Speaker 1>for a hike and then go go botox.

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<v Speaker 2>Totally very la of us, but yeah, it does feel

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<v Speaker 2>like an invitation into our more personal lives and just

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<v Speaker 2>into our worlds. Yeah, because we do live outside of

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<v Speaker 2>this box. I know it's hard to believe, but sometimes

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<v Speaker 2>we leave this place not often.

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<v Speaker 1>I know, how are you feeling, How you doing good?

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<v Speaker 1>I feel good? I am, you know, grounding.

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<v Speaker 2>I think I'm just finally getting into twenty twenty four.

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<v Speaker 2>Where before I was like resistant, I was still resting,

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<v Speaker 2>but now I'm here. I'm here at the rest of

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<v Speaker 2>the world. In twenty twenty four. Finally, I think I

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<v Speaker 2>brought in the new year with the Chinese.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't know how, but I do know how. This

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<v Speaker 1>always happens. But if you're watching us on YouTube, you'll

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<v Speaker 1>see that me and me and l are basically dressed

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<v Speaker 1>exactly alike. This just continues to happen. I swear I

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<v Speaker 1>can't make the shit up. Like this is a very

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<v Speaker 1>specific look also that we see.

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<v Speaker 2>This is a very specifically, very specific Usually we're like

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<v Speaker 2>color coordinating, print coordinating, but today we just fold on

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<v Speaker 2>what renaissance And apparently you both got the menue the

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<v Speaker 2>fucking memo, because if you haven't joined us on I

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<v Speaker 2>mean on YouTube yet, you need to come see us.

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<v Speaker 2>We're always dressed to like, we're always look cute, we're

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<v Speaker 2>always doing our makeup, and today is a very particular

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<v Speaker 2>specific outfit that you must see.

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<v Speaker 1>I know. I found this at a at a thrift

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<v Speaker 1>shop in the valley, which actually this thrift shop specifically

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<v Speaker 1>is my Like it's not a secret because it's very

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<v Speaker 1>much Venture Boulevard, but I've been going there since I

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<v Speaker 1>was like fifteen, because I went through a phase of

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<v Speaker 1>thinking I was an Olsen twin and yeah, I know

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<v Speaker 1>not like actually, like I didn't want to be them,

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<v Speaker 1>I just wanted to be rich like them and dressed

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<v Speaker 1>sort of like that. What was their look because I

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<v Speaker 1>don't really it was like homeless vintage, you know.

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<v Speaker 2>I went to the vintage stage too, but it definitely

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<v Speaker 2>wasn't because of the fucking Kate and Ashley Olsen. Well,

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<v Speaker 2>I didn't remember them having like any style. I just

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<v Speaker 2>remember them looking a little dead.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh. I went to a lot of parties with them

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<v Speaker 1>because they were at Campbell Hall. Yeah, they went to

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<v Speaker 1>Campbell Hall and they were at the neighboring private school.

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<v Speaker 1>And then they would always be wearing They're like super vintagey.

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<v Speaker 1>Even now, at least Mary Kate, she'll come always.

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<v Speaker 2>I touch every time I see them. They look like

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<v Speaker 2>a little dead, a little tired, like they smell a

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<v Speaker 2>lot of.

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<v Speaker 1>It's only it's Mary Kate. They always look like they

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<v Speaker 1>look alike. They aways look at this, No, they don't

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<v Speaker 1>look alike. They don't look like Mary Kate looks not well.

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<v Speaker 1>Ashley was always the one that was healthier. It's true.

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<v Speaker 1>Mary Kay went through a very heavy in erexic phase

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<v Speaker 1>and was not doing well. It was doing lots of

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<v Speaker 1>cocaine that it seems welcome to the married an old man. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>are they still married? I think they might be, but

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<v Speaker 1>who knows. I don't know. You might have died so

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<v Speaker 1>dark anyway, well, anyway, that sore. Specifically, I went to

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<v Speaker 1>you never said it, oh, because I don't want everyone

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<v Speaker 1>to know about it when we go to mm hmm, okay, yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>anyone who lives in the valley probably knows. But but

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<v Speaker 1>every now and then you find just like some gems,

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<v Speaker 1>and I found this one and I was like, oh

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<v Speaker 1>my god, they're gonna fit my boobs. And then it

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<v Speaker 1>did and it didn't even like squish them. It actually

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<v Speaker 1>like it's like made for them.

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<v Speaker 2>Is that we actually decided this week. You'll be the

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<v Speaker 2>first to know. You're the first on the streets to

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<v Speaker 2>go breaking news that not only are we going to

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<v Speaker 2>continue to coordinate telepathically for the rest of you know,

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<v Speaker 2>our lives, but we're also decided that we are going

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<v Speaker 2>to dress old timey at all public appearances that we

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<v Speaker 2>do together, and that includes birthday parties. So hire us

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<v Speaker 2>to Joel address the old timey internext birthday party bookings

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<v Speaker 2>that good Mom's.

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<v Speaker 1>But it's true. It's true. I feel like I'm stepping

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<v Speaker 1>into my my real retro era. I feel like it

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<v Speaker 1>suits me. I feel like my body was made for

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<v Speaker 1>this era. Mine too.

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<v Speaker 2>All this shit in the vintage story is usually super tiny.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't know about these boobs, but we're gonna get

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<v Speaker 2>them the memo. But this outfit is this is from Amazon.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh that's a good one.

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<v Speaker 2>This is a good Amazon find. So you know, as

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<v Speaker 2>long as you're searching, you find they find the looks.

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<v Speaker 2>This year, we're gonna focus more on our fashions. We

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<v Speaker 2>didn't really we didn't really take you into our fashion world,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, in the first six years.

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<v Speaker 1>But this is the year because I know you're dying

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<v Speaker 1>to know, Well, we have one. They have. We have

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<v Speaker 1>a few more episodes left of this season, so we

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<v Speaker 1>got to get the fashions in quick. My fashion is like.

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<v Speaker 2>Martha Stewart, Betty Crocker meets Lola Bunny.

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<v Speaker 1>What's the bunny? What's the bitch from uh with the

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<v Speaker 1>red hair? Yeah?

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, Like Betty Crocker meets Jessica Rabbit. That says, this

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<v Speaker 2>is where my My Wardshow night meets vintage. Kind of

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<v Speaker 2>depends on what day you meet me, but that's pretty

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<v Speaker 2>much it for like phrilly, floral, see through extreme sex,

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<v Speaker 2>kitten sweater.

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<v Speaker 1>Hmmm. I don't know what mine is. I mean mine

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<v Speaker 1>is like pin up Girl Malficent, you know, a little.

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<v Speaker 2>Dark it can it can also like it can also

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<v Speaker 2>like venture to vampire.

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<v Speaker 1>Little vampirey. I like, I got like a strong vampire.

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<v Speaker 2>Look me too, like black lip occasionally darkness.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, pretty much lace. I'm not really a frilly girl.

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<v Speaker 1>I like like like long gloves. I mean I can

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<v Speaker 1>wear gloves, but I do. I'm not into florals per se.

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<v Speaker 1>I like florals. Hmmm.

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<v Speaker 2>So how are you feeling about this season so far?

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<v Speaker 1>I feel great. I feel really excited. What I like

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<v Speaker 1>this season of your life? This season of like this season.

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<v Speaker 2>Yes, it's about to end, but I know no one knows,

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<v Speaker 2>but our lives still go on even when the season stops,

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<v Speaker 2>and only the people on Patreon will know about that. Yeah, honestly,

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<v Speaker 2>it's very stop secret and a lot of changes being made,

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<v Speaker 2>So you might want to get over there and figure

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<v Speaker 2>out what the fuck is going on because us of

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<v Speaker 2>things are going on.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I feel like maybe on Patreon as where I'll

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<v Speaker 1>talk more openly about my love life because I don't

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<v Speaker 1>know if I'm ever gonna like expose my love life

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<v Speaker 1>again on the internet because you've trauma. I feel like

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<v Speaker 1>it's bad juju.

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<v Speaker 2>I mean, I developed my entire relationship on the internet

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<v Speaker 2>and it worked out just fine.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, not developed my own relationship.

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<v Speaker 2>My relationship was actually sourced on the internet, developed publicly

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<v Speaker 2>and it worked out.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, that's your story, it doesn't have to be mine.

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<v Speaker 1>I think that. I don't know, why do you think

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<v Speaker 1>it's bad juju? Just because anything can happen and things change.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh oh, like like posting an again and then you

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<v Speaker 2>have to be like never mind, not that I'm like,

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<v Speaker 2>oh god, I looked really cute in this picture.

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<v Speaker 1>Why the fuck do I need to unarchive it? Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>Like that's really one of my deep conflictions on breakups.

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<v Speaker 1>It's like when you post an aga but then you

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<v Speaker 1>look good in the picture, and it's like Instagram really

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<v Speaker 1>needs to create some sort of feature where you can

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<v Speaker 1>just like crop people out of pictures you don't want

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<v Speaker 1>to actually take down, but there's a cropping feature. Do

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<v Speaker 1>you have any pictures of this or you can actually

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<v Speaker 1>can you delete carousel photos? I think no, I don't.

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<v Speaker 2>I mean, I don't update my phone because I don't change.

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<v Speaker 2>You can, you can, if you have a carousel, you

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<v Speaker 2>can delete certain images.

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<v Speaker 1>Wow, show me that the update that's been happening for

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<v Speaker 1>a while, and I need to see this.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I have a strong stance that I don't delete pictures.

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<v Speaker 1>Like, I'm very upset because my birthday picture. I can't.

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<v Speaker 1>It's it's just I can't even have my birthday picture

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<v Speaker 1>on my Instagram feed and you took it off. I

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<v Speaker 1>archived it. Oh was it a group photo? It was

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<v Speaker 1>a solo photo.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh, he was in it, but I didn't remember you

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<v Speaker 2>posting him.

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<v Speaker 1>It was me in the bathroom him like you could

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<v Speaker 1>barely see you see his mouth, and so you deleted it. Ye.

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<v Speaker 2>The crazy part about us censoring our love lives or

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<v Speaker 2>whatever our private lives behind Patreon is that, like, the

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<v Speaker 2>niggas that really want to be obsessive are going to

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<v Speaker 2>just pay the ten dollars.

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<v Speaker 1>That's fine, but if you better, like, and I have questions,

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<v Speaker 1>I have, like I need advice, and I don't need

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<v Speaker 1>advice from all fucking fifty thousand of yall niggas, okay,

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<v Speaker 1>And I need a cute little a few thousand in

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<v Speaker 1>my Patreon's advice versus the Peanut Galleries advice. I mean, honest,

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<v Speaker 1>some of y'all are gonna give me fucked up advice.

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<v Speaker 2>Patreon is like, really my only safe space because my

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<v Speaker 2>boyfriend is everywhere except Patreon.

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<v Speaker 1>You don't think he's on Patreon. No, this boyfriend is not.

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<v Speaker 2>He that's maybe the one place he's not on because

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<v Speaker 2>he's literally over my shoulder right now as I record.

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<v Speaker 1>But Patreon is I'm gonna.

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<v Speaker 2>Start asking for advice on their dah.

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<v Speaker 1>I can't even do it really in discord, because I

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<v Speaker 1>feel like you can't do a discord, like I can't

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<v Speaker 1>even complain anywhere except secretly in Erica's ear. I posted

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<v Speaker 1>a picture of my butt on Patreon. You did, yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>because it looked good and I was in Europe and

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<v Speaker 1>I was just I felt sexy, and I was posting

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<v Speaker 1>pictures of my my sexy pictures in the mirror. One

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<v Speaker 1>of them was me turned around with my booty, and

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<v Speaker 1>my ex must have joined Patreon, and then in a fight,

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<v Speaker 1>he like pulled up the picture and I was like,

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<v Speaker 1>how does this make me feel safe? If you're posting

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<v Speaker 1>your ass on Patreon, and I was.

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<v Speaker 2>Like, how does it make me feel safe that you're

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<v Speaker 2>on there and I don't even know you're the First

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<v Speaker 2>of all, it's called a paywall.

0:10:12.480 --> 0:10:15.439
<v Speaker 1>Second of all, it's an ass. Did he try to say,

0:10:15.440 --> 0:10:17.520
<v Speaker 1>You're like, now you're an only fan. There's worse things

0:10:17.559 --> 0:10:19.480
<v Speaker 1>I could post. Now you're only fans, a bitch because

0:10:19.480 --> 0:10:22.720
<v Speaker 1>you posted your buttet. But the thing about it was like, whatever,

0:10:22.760 --> 0:10:25.080
<v Speaker 1>We're not gonna talk about this man anyway. This is

0:10:25.120 --> 0:10:27.599
<v Speaker 1>a this is why this is on Patreon. This is

0:10:27.679 --> 0:10:32.320
<v Speaker 1>a supreme gas lighter. Literally, you know, I had this concept.

0:10:32.360 --> 0:10:34.480
<v Speaker 2>I had this idea in my mind come up lately,

0:10:34.760 --> 0:10:37.040
<v Speaker 2>and I forgot to tell people because nobody asked me

0:10:37.160 --> 0:10:37.719
<v Speaker 2>until right now.

0:10:37.760 --> 0:10:42.319
<v Speaker 1>Okay, what it's about gas lighters?

0:10:42.880 --> 0:10:45.520
<v Speaker 2>And it's about men specifically, because someone asked me a

0:10:45.559 --> 0:10:48.680
<v Speaker 2>question about a guy that had like all this sexual

0:10:48.800 --> 0:10:52.319
<v Speaker 2>like chemistry with Oh, this is our homegirl. Somebody from

0:10:52.360 --> 0:10:55.040
<v Speaker 2>a tribe hit me up about Tantra asking you about

0:10:55.040 --> 0:10:58.880
<v Speaker 2>a guy that she was having energetic orgasms with, like

0:10:59.000 --> 0:11:01.480
<v Speaker 2>not even like having but just like coming from the

0:11:01.679 --> 0:11:03.640
<v Speaker 2>energetic leg and.

0:11:03.559 --> 0:11:05.880
<v Speaker 1>I was like, I had that before recently.

0:11:06.120 --> 0:11:09.320
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, and there's difference and it happens. I just think

0:11:09.360 --> 0:11:14.320
<v Speaker 2>that women need to be clear because the right type

0:11:14.360 --> 0:11:17.160
<v Speaker 2>of gas lighting nig not the right type no for

0:11:17.200 --> 0:11:22.719
<v Speaker 2>real is super super well versed in women and in manipulation.

0:11:23.280 --> 0:11:26.960
<v Speaker 2>And most men know from an early age, probably from

0:11:27.000 --> 0:11:28.200
<v Speaker 2>like sixteen, that women are.

0:11:28.080 --> 0:11:30.520
<v Speaker 1>Easily moved by dick.

0:11:31.840 --> 0:11:34.480
<v Speaker 2>And you have to be careful because there's men who

0:11:34.520 --> 0:11:37.600
<v Speaker 2>will really hone in on their sexual power just so

0:11:37.640 --> 0:11:40.200
<v Speaker 2>they can manipulate you, and it will feel like, oh

0:11:40.280 --> 0:11:43.080
<v Speaker 2>my god, he's so sexy, it's so passionate. It is

0:11:43.120 --> 0:11:46.520
<v Speaker 2>so much chemistry, but really it's top notch practice and

0:11:46.880 --> 0:11:51.160
<v Speaker 2>fucking you over by fucking you. And some guys just

0:11:51.280 --> 0:11:53.160
<v Speaker 2>do it dumbly. They don't even know, like they know

0:11:53.200 --> 0:11:54.640
<v Speaker 2>they're doing it, but they don't real they haven't really

0:11:54.679 --> 0:11:57.880
<v Speaker 2>mastered it. But you have to really be careful of

0:11:57.960 --> 0:12:01.520
<v Speaker 2>the masterful master seducers.

0:12:01.600 --> 0:12:03.839
<v Speaker 1>You're right, there's people that really use that energy and

0:12:03.880 --> 0:12:06.040
<v Speaker 1>they really know how to manipulate it and hone it

0:12:06.120 --> 0:12:09.439
<v Speaker 1>and really harness it to the best of their ability

0:12:09.520 --> 0:12:12.200
<v Speaker 1>so that you will be mind fucked and fucked up

0:12:12.240 --> 0:12:14.440
<v Speaker 1>out here. And then suddenly it's five years later and

0:12:14.480 --> 0:12:17.120
<v Speaker 1>you're still dealing with this nigga, and he's drained the

0:12:17.120 --> 0:12:19.720
<v Speaker 1>fuck out of you. Your overweight, you have dark.

0:12:19.559 --> 0:12:21.360
<v Speaker 2>Circles, and now he's making you feel bad about it.

0:12:21.400 --> 0:12:24.160
<v Speaker 1>And you have four different businesses under your name that

0:12:24.240 --> 0:12:26.240
<v Speaker 1>he started, and now your credit's fucked up.

0:12:27.720 --> 0:12:29.760
<v Speaker 2>So yeah, I mean, people just you just have to

0:12:29.760 --> 0:12:32.880
<v Speaker 2>be careful of people who study the passion of things

0:12:32.880 --> 0:12:36.319
<v Speaker 2>and take advantage of your vulnerability solely for the purpose

0:12:36.400 --> 0:12:37.240
<v Speaker 2>of fucking you over.

0:12:37.320 --> 0:12:38.679
<v Speaker 1>And I feel like that is a thing.

0:12:38.720 --> 0:12:43.560
<v Speaker 2>So you don't mistake chemistry for gas lighting ass, fake ass,

0:12:43.559 --> 0:12:44.760
<v Speaker 2>manipulative as niggas.

0:12:44.840 --> 0:12:48.679
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, definitely, this was Yeah, yes, this is what happened.

0:12:50.360 --> 0:12:52.640
<v Speaker 1>Mine went to dom school instead of going to therapy.

0:12:53.240 --> 0:12:54.960
<v Speaker 2>That should have been a red flag when you ask

0:12:55.000 --> 0:12:56.880
<v Speaker 2>the nigga, please go to therapy and instead he goes

0:12:56.920 --> 0:13:00.480
<v Speaker 2>to the school of doming. That's how you should know

0:13:01.000 --> 0:13:04.160
<v Speaker 2>red flag. This is not even talking.

0:13:04.400 --> 0:13:08.080
<v Speaker 1>So to answer your question, this season of my life

0:13:08.679 --> 0:13:11.680
<v Speaker 1>doing great, doing a lot better. I'm out of my

0:13:11.920 --> 0:13:15.720
<v Speaker 1>fucking hypnotism. Oh god, you know, like ja'far with that stick,

0:13:15.800 --> 0:13:21.000
<v Speaker 1>I'm the hypnotism. I feel really clear, I feel really healthy.

0:13:21.640 --> 0:13:25.400
<v Speaker 1>I've been I've been on a like a cleansing fast

0:13:25.600 --> 0:13:28.440
<v Speaker 1>preparing for just the year, and I always kind of

0:13:28.440 --> 0:13:30.040
<v Speaker 1>do that in the beginning of January. And also I

0:13:30.080 --> 0:13:31.880
<v Speaker 1>like to go into our retreats kind of feeling really

0:13:31.880 --> 0:13:35.200
<v Speaker 1>good as clear as I can. So I'm excited to

0:13:36.280 --> 0:13:43.000
<v Speaker 1>go out there and just really have mental space for

0:13:43.120 --> 0:13:45.960
<v Speaker 1>all the energy and all the information that I'm surely

0:13:46.000 --> 0:13:51.480
<v Speaker 1>going to receive while I'm there. I am, I'm in.

0:13:51.559 --> 0:13:53.480
<v Speaker 1>I'm in a happy space too. I've been I'm not.

0:13:53.559 --> 0:13:54.760
<v Speaker 1>I know, I'm not. I'm not going to go into

0:13:54.800 --> 0:13:57.360
<v Speaker 1>the deep details of my personal life, but I am.

0:13:57.400 --> 0:14:00.120
<v Speaker 1>I've been seeing somebody and that's been really cool and

0:14:00.559 --> 0:14:08.440
<v Speaker 1>unexpected and really easy. And I think we talked about

0:14:08.440 --> 0:14:11.840
<v Speaker 1>this with Christa about like our last episode, about like

0:14:11.880 --> 0:14:15.120
<v Speaker 1>how relationship should be easy and how like like earlier,

0:14:15.240 --> 0:14:16.599
<v Speaker 1>I mean, in the middle of last year, it was

0:14:16.679 --> 0:14:19.200
<v Speaker 1>I was in a really hard space, feeling like I

0:14:19.200 --> 0:14:21.120
<v Speaker 1>don't get to write my love story and that maybe

0:14:21.160 --> 0:14:23.560
<v Speaker 1>mine just starts off hard and then it gets easier,

0:14:24.080 --> 0:14:26.720
<v Speaker 1>and then I am now that I'm out of the hypnotism,

0:14:26.800 --> 0:14:31.520
<v Speaker 1>I'm realizing no, no, no, So I don't know. I

0:14:32.080 --> 0:14:35.400
<v Speaker 1>feel good. I feel like it's been great, but it's

0:14:35.400 --> 0:14:37.560
<v Speaker 1>not the focal point of what I'm like, what's happening

0:14:37.600 --> 0:14:41.800
<v Speaker 1>in my life, which is good also because I feel

0:14:41.840 --> 0:14:43.720
<v Speaker 1>like I didn't. I feel like a lot of times

0:14:43.760 --> 0:14:47.320
<v Speaker 1>as women, we leave a relationship, we meet a new man,

0:14:47.560 --> 0:14:51.760
<v Speaker 1>and then we just kind of sweep over whatever it

0:14:51.840 --> 0:14:53.600
<v Speaker 1>is that like was left over there and not really

0:14:53.680 --> 0:14:56.520
<v Speaker 1>dealing with it. And so I think me not having sex,

0:14:57.040 --> 0:15:00.840
<v Speaker 1>me you know, not always making myse self available to

0:15:00.880 --> 0:15:03.120
<v Speaker 1>this person and him also not making himself available to

0:15:03.160 --> 0:15:05.640
<v Speaker 1>me all the time has created like healthy boundaries so

0:15:05.680 --> 0:15:09.040
<v Speaker 1>that we can still be proactive in our lives and

0:15:09.280 --> 0:15:13.280
<v Speaker 1>clear about like what we want separately and then also together.

0:15:13.400 --> 0:15:17.440
<v Speaker 2>So yeah, that's beautiful. I think everybody does that. Like

0:15:17.520 --> 0:15:19.560
<v Speaker 2>you get in love and then you'd like melt into

0:15:19.640 --> 0:15:21.840
<v Speaker 2>like the ten year old version of yourself and you

0:15:21.920 --> 0:15:23.640
<v Speaker 2>just want to be around the person. And how I

0:15:23.680 --> 0:15:28.680
<v Speaker 2>have to actively resist my accussion I'm crazy. Yeah, I'm

0:15:28.800 --> 0:15:29.840
<v Speaker 2>actually crazy.

0:15:30.320 --> 0:15:35.320
<v Speaker 1>And like scorpio energy together is and I keep attracting

0:15:35.320 --> 0:15:37.160
<v Speaker 1>scorpios like I don't know what it is. I don't

0:15:37.160 --> 0:15:39.240
<v Speaker 1>know what this lesson is in my life where I've

0:15:39.240 --> 0:15:41.960
<v Speaker 1>been attracting male scorpios for the last like two and

0:15:42.000 --> 0:15:44.360
<v Speaker 1>a half years over back to back maybe three years,

0:15:44.360 --> 0:15:47.440
<v Speaker 1>back to back to back, and so that energy is

0:15:47.560 --> 0:15:50.920
<v Speaker 1>really intense, and I think maybe that's like the lesson

0:15:51.000 --> 0:15:55.600
<v Speaker 1>is like learning how to manage that intensity in a

0:15:55.600 --> 0:15:59.360
<v Speaker 1>healthy way and like use it towards creativity, or use

0:15:59.400 --> 0:16:01.760
<v Speaker 1>it towards good or use it towards like creating a

0:16:01.800 --> 0:16:04.920
<v Speaker 1>healthy love space for your relationship instead of it just

0:16:04.920 --> 0:16:09.320
<v Speaker 1>being seeped in sex obsession and longing and.

0:16:09.720 --> 0:16:13.000
<v Speaker 2>Which we love, bitches love obsession and longing and sex.

0:16:13.280 --> 0:16:18.240
<v Speaker 2>And then I think also we like we surrender to

0:16:18.480 --> 0:16:20.920
<v Speaker 2>just like the love like shiny thing, like all the

0:16:21.040 --> 0:16:23.640
<v Speaker 2>other things I was doing doesn't matter. This is what matters,

0:16:23.960 --> 0:16:26.560
<v Speaker 2>and then we like forget and not forget. It's just

0:16:26.600 --> 0:16:32.040
<v Speaker 2>like we revert into like this childlike puppy love version

0:16:32.080 --> 0:16:35.040
<v Speaker 2>of ourselves, like schoolgirl. But I also think too, like

0:16:35.160 --> 0:16:38.720
<v Speaker 2>just thinking about what you said is like the easiness.

0:16:38.840 --> 0:16:41.720
<v Speaker 2>It's like you have to really be conscious of the

0:16:41.720 --> 0:16:44.040
<v Speaker 2>things that you ask for and the things that are

0:16:44.480 --> 0:16:46.440
<v Speaker 2>that you're manifesting, because I think that's where.

0:16:46.280 --> 0:16:46.960
<v Speaker 1>We fuck up, right.

0:16:46.960 --> 0:16:48.680
<v Speaker 2>You're like I want this, I want this, I want this,

0:16:48.720 --> 0:16:50.200
<v Speaker 2>I want this, and then they come and they're like

0:16:50.840 --> 0:16:52.720
<v Speaker 2>fifty percent of it and you're like, no, I gotta work.

0:16:52.920 --> 0:16:54.760
<v Speaker 2>It's like, no, you have to trust what you ask for,

0:16:55.360 --> 0:16:57.200
<v Speaker 2>and like, I think sometimes we forget that. It's like

0:16:57.240 --> 0:16:59.280
<v Speaker 2>the manifesting is a lot of the work, but you

0:16:59.360 --> 0:17:01.680
<v Speaker 2>kind of have to full up with the manifest you

0:17:01.680 --> 0:17:05.040
<v Speaker 2>can't ask for all these things. And then when the

0:17:05.119 --> 0:17:08.280
<v Speaker 2>first nigga rolls up thirty five percent, you're like, Yep,

0:17:08.320 --> 0:17:08.760
<v Speaker 2>this is it.

0:17:09.840 --> 0:17:11.720
<v Speaker 1>I know I wrote this other shit, but god, it's cool.

0:17:11.720 --> 0:17:12.720
<v Speaker 1>I can't have it all.

0:17:12.760 --> 0:17:14.760
<v Speaker 2>He'll get to it later, because I think a lot

0:17:14.760 --> 0:17:17.040
<v Speaker 2>of us are like I can't have it all, Like

0:17:17.119 --> 0:17:19.560
<v Speaker 2>I'm asking for too much and you're not, you know,

0:17:19.680 --> 0:17:22.719
<v Speaker 2>and I'm just I'm realizing that, Like even right now

0:17:22.760 --> 0:17:25.600
<v Speaker 2>in this season of my life, I feel very good,

0:17:25.760 --> 0:17:25.919
<v Speaker 2>you know.

0:17:25.960 --> 0:17:26.760
<v Speaker 1>I feel like I'm in.

0:17:26.760 --> 0:17:31.320
<v Speaker 2>A very healthy place, and like I'm always thinking about

0:17:31.320 --> 0:17:33.399
<v Speaker 2>what more I can have. You know, were always always

0:17:33.440 --> 0:17:35.320
<v Speaker 2>like going like the next goal. I need more, I

0:17:35.359 --> 0:17:37.879
<v Speaker 2>need more money, I need more of this, more travel

0:17:37.920 --> 0:17:43.000
<v Speaker 2>in first class. But like I just feel really content

0:17:43.080 --> 0:17:46.119
<v Speaker 2>and happy and like family like and family driven and

0:17:46.160 --> 0:17:48.200
<v Speaker 2>solved in that space and that that feels really good

0:17:48.240 --> 0:17:50.119
<v Speaker 2>because I ask for that, you know. So it's just

0:17:50.160 --> 0:17:54.520
<v Speaker 2>like settling into the space of I deserve this shit.

0:17:54.600 --> 0:17:56.520
<v Speaker 2>I deserve to be happy. I deserve to be in

0:17:56.520 --> 0:17:59.439
<v Speaker 2>a safe space and in like a healthy relationship that

0:17:59.440 --> 0:18:02.080
<v Speaker 2>doesn't require a lot of worry or a lot of stress,

0:18:02.640 --> 0:18:06.320
<v Speaker 2>and like just changing my perspective about like really what

0:18:06.520 --> 0:18:08.159
<v Speaker 2>I believe that I can have and what kind of

0:18:08.240 --> 0:18:09.720
<v Speaker 2>life I can have and how that feels.

0:18:11.080 --> 0:18:15.000
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I think that is like the feeling of safety

0:18:15.040 --> 0:18:17.359
<v Speaker 1>of like knowing that if you have an argument or

0:18:17.400 --> 0:18:19.760
<v Speaker 1>disagreement with someone, it's not the end of your relationship.

0:18:19.960 --> 0:18:24.000
<v Speaker 1>Is I feel like crucial in the relationship, in any relationship,

0:18:24.000 --> 0:18:26.800
<v Speaker 1>but especially one where you're really trying to build a family.

0:18:27.040 --> 0:18:29.919
<v Speaker 1>And like you and Orlando have have like you like

0:18:30.000 --> 0:18:33.280
<v Speaker 1>and Luna loves Orlando and like has come to really

0:18:33.359 --> 0:18:36.879
<v Speaker 1>I think accept him as this father figure in her life.

0:18:37.600 --> 0:18:39.960
<v Speaker 1>And and you too, Like I know that's been like

0:18:39.960 --> 0:18:42.399
<v Speaker 1>an adjustment period for you, kind of getting comfortable with

0:18:42.440 --> 0:18:44.679
<v Speaker 1>that idea even though it's what you asked for. But

0:18:44.800 --> 0:18:46.720
<v Speaker 1>like maybe, but when you ask for these things, you

0:18:46.760 --> 0:18:49.560
<v Speaker 1>don't always think about the uncomfortability that you have to

0:18:49.600 --> 0:18:51.480
<v Speaker 1>walk through in order to really get what you want,

0:18:51.760 --> 0:18:54.600
<v Speaker 1>even when when it's arrived, like Okay, he's here. Okay,

0:18:54.640 --> 0:18:56.399
<v Speaker 1>he wants to do it. Oh shit, don't tell my

0:18:56.480 --> 0:18:58.879
<v Speaker 1>kid what the fuck to do? What the fuck do

0:18:58.920 --> 0:19:02.120
<v Speaker 1>you mean? Tell her say please? You know, like all

0:19:02.119 --> 0:19:04.240
<v Speaker 1>these things that you've asked for, and then you're like, oh,

0:19:04.320 --> 0:19:07.160
<v Speaker 1>and this requires me to also do some work too,

0:19:07.480 --> 0:19:10.879
<v Speaker 1>Because you want a strong mail figure in your in

0:19:10.920 --> 0:19:14.240
<v Speaker 1>your household. He's also a good strong mail figure is

0:19:14.280 --> 0:19:16.639
<v Speaker 1>also going to check you sometimes too, in your in

0:19:16.680 --> 0:19:19.880
<v Speaker 1>your parenting. He's not just gonna let shit slide, you know.

0:19:20.119 --> 0:19:22.119
<v Speaker 1>And and I know that that can be I mean,

0:19:22.160 --> 0:19:25.040
<v Speaker 1>I can only imagine, especially when you finally do find

0:19:25.040 --> 0:19:27.240
<v Speaker 1>someone that you really trusts how like that can be challenging,

0:19:27.640 --> 0:19:29.520
<v Speaker 1>but also once you get to the other side of it,

0:19:29.560 --> 0:19:30.439
<v Speaker 1>how beautiful it is.

0:19:31.280 --> 0:19:33.840
<v Speaker 2>It definitely is challenging, just because like I really a

0:19:33.880 --> 0:19:35.280
<v Speaker 2>lot of times you want to be like, you don't

0:19:35.320 --> 0:19:36.200
<v Speaker 2>even have any kids.

0:19:36.320 --> 0:19:38.480
<v Speaker 1>Oh don't tell me how to parent, you know.

0:19:38.560 --> 0:19:40.240
<v Speaker 2>It's just like there's a there's a there does It

0:19:40.280 --> 0:19:44.800
<v Speaker 2>requires a lot of checking myself and like really checking

0:19:44.880 --> 0:19:47.080
<v Speaker 2>back into what it is I ask for and like

0:19:47.119 --> 0:19:49.720
<v Speaker 2>what does that look like? And how can I be

0:19:49.840 --> 0:19:53.560
<v Speaker 2>in this space in a healthy place. But I think something.

0:19:53.640 --> 0:19:55.480
<v Speaker 2>I said this because I think sometimes we ask for

0:19:55.560 --> 0:20:00.040
<v Speaker 2>shit not realizing that it definitely does require that you.

0:20:00.040 --> 0:20:04.040
<v Speaker 1>You you can ask for shit and write it down, but

0:20:04.080 --> 0:20:05.840
<v Speaker 1>you actually have to sit in it and think about

0:20:05.840 --> 0:20:06.560
<v Speaker 1>how it feels.

0:20:07.000 --> 0:20:09.320
<v Speaker 2>How does it feel if I, if I'm at the registered,

0:20:09.320 --> 0:20:11.439
<v Speaker 2>I don't have to worry about running the card, Like

0:20:11.480 --> 0:20:12.880
<v Speaker 2>what does that feel like? Because a lot of times

0:20:12.880 --> 0:20:15.600
<v Speaker 2>we wrote the register, I'm like, oh shit, god damn it,

0:20:15.640 --> 0:20:17.679
<v Speaker 2>But like, what does it really feel like, like embodying

0:20:17.720 --> 0:20:22.200
<v Speaker 2>the feeling of like what it feels like to embody

0:20:22.240 --> 0:20:24.679
<v Speaker 2>that living moment, you know, and like that attracts it.

0:20:24.920 --> 0:20:26.480
<v Speaker 1>But I think sometimes you were writing down like.

0:20:26.440 --> 0:20:29.679
<v Speaker 2>This this fairy tale love story not realizing that it

0:20:29.760 --> 0:20:32.840
<v Speaker 2>requires work from you. Because yeah, when Orlando first showed up,

0:20:32.920 --> 0:20:35.440
<v Speaker 2>like within like six months, he was like, oh my daughter,

0:20:35.480 --> 0:20:39.600
<v Speaker 2>and I was like, ooh sh you gotta say that,

0:20:39.760 --> 0:20:44.000
<v Speaker 2>like that seems that seems intense, you know, like pump

0:20:44.000 --> 0:20:48.040
<v Speaker 2>your brakes before you start dropping mds, you know. But

0:20:48.320 --> 0:20:50.679
<v Speaker 2>I think I had to check myself and like really

0:20:50.760 --> 0:20:53.320
<v Speaker 2>kind of just be okay with someone who is okay

0:20:53.359 --> 0:20:56.080
<v Speaker 2>with taking on the role as a stepfather and even

0:20:56.200 --> 0:20:59.960
<v Speaker 2>just the things that I've had to release in that part,

0:21:00.400 --> 0:21:03.399
<v Speaker 2>and it is like, why are you reprimanding my child

0:21:03.440 --> 0:21:05.640
<v Speaker 2>and me? Who the fuck do you think you are?

0:21:06.680 --> 0:21:11.240
<v Speaker 2>But it's taken me, like literally, quite literally, the an

0:21:11.400 --> 0:21:14.639
<v Speaker 2>entire year plus to be comfortable in the fact that

0:21:14.640 --> 0:21:16.760
<v Speaker 2>I'm with somebody and no matter how much you piss

0:21:16.840 --> 0:21:19.800
<v Speaker 2>me off, I'm we're not leaving each other. And I

0:21:19.800 --> 0:21:22.359
<v Speaker 2>think that is something that most people and most women

0:21:22.400 --> 0:21:26.879
<v Speaker 2>don't have the safety to experience. And so I've found

0:21:26.880 --> 0:21:30.879
<v Speaker 2>myself in the face of conflict wanting to be like

0:21:31.960 --> 0:21:34.159
<v Speaker 2>wanting to want to be out because that's my general

0:21:34.240 --> 0:21:37.520
<v Speaker 2>like I don't need you, but being like, damn, I

0:21:37.520 --> 0:21:38.240
<v Speaker 2>do need you.

0:21:38.200 --> 0:21:39.760
<v Speaker 1>And I want you, and.

0:21:39.720 --> 0:21:43.119
<v Speaker 2>I have to be able to release and let go

0:21:43.240 --> 0:21:46.560
<v Speaker 2>of conflict and things in order to move past it,

0:21:46.560 --> 0:21:48.240
<v Speaker 2>because I'm human and I expect you to do the

0:21:48.280 --> 0:21:50.480
<v Speaker 2>same thing, because literally, holding on too grudges with people

0:21:50.480 --> 0:21:53.960
<v Speaker 2>that we love, friendships too literally doesn't serve us at all.

0:21:54.400 --> 0:21:57.719
<v Speaker 2>It just brings you further away from your friends. And

0:21:57.760 --> 0:21:59.639
<v Speaker 2>it's like the human part of it all because I

0:21:59.680 --> 0:22:03.679
<v Speaker 2>think the happily ever after is so often sold to

0:22:03.800 --> 0:22:06.840
<v Speaker 2>us on TV, but we have we so we're not

0:22:07.040 --> 0:22:10.280
<v Speaker 2>really living it or experiencing it that it requires like

0:22:10.320 --> 0:22:13.080
<v Speaker 2>this big, not this. It doesn't have to be big,

0:22:13.119 --> 0:22:18.200
<v Speaker 2>but it does. It requires this this process of getting

0:22:18.240 --> 0:22:20.880
<v Speaker 2>comfortable and accepting that it's good.

0:22:21.200 --> 0:22:24.360
<v Speaker 1>Well, that's beautiful. I look forward to that experience myself.

0:22:24.720 --> 0:22:27.120
<v Speaker 1>I feel like I've gotten like not, I don't think

0:22:27.119 --> 0:22:29.959
<v Speaker 1>I've really even gotten that close to it. I've had,

0:22:30.640 --> 0:22:33.359
<v Speaker 1>you know, guys that have come in and like, you know,

0:22:33.560 --> 0:22:35.840
<v Speaker 1>it's so women are so basic. We see our like

0:22:35.920 --> 0:22:39.360
<v Speaker 1>are a male single moms are basic in ways, right.

0:22:39.440 --> 0:22:43.000
<v Speaker 1>We see a man that we're intimate with that we

0:22:43.240 --> 0:22:45.119
<v Speaker 1>kind of like, and he's nice to our kids, and

0:22:45.119 --> 0:22:50.720
<v Speaker 1>then we literally start imagining a whole fucking fairy tale life.

0:22:51.000 --> 0:22:52.480
<v Speaker 1>Oh my god, look, Namy's so good. I cant to

0:22:52.480 --> 0:22:54.760
<v Speaker 1>see him doing math homework with her. And then and

0:22:54.800 --> 0:22:56.400
<v Speaker 1>then he's gonna be there. He's gonna catch our first

0:22:56.440 --> 0:22:59.520
<v Speaker 1>baby and at the Purpose birthing center. Actually fuck that,

0:22:59.560 --> 0:23:02.159
<v Speaker 1>We're gonna get birth and home and then he's perfect.

0:23:02.200 --> 0:23:03.520
<v Speaker 1>He's in a teacher how to ride a bike, or

0:23:03.600 --> 0:23:09.760
<v Speaker 1>Lando top my daughter. He's going to you know, and

0:23:08.960 --> 0:23:11.639
<v Speaker 1>and I've totally fallen into that trap. I mean I

0:23:11.640 --> 0:23:13.840
<v Speaker 1>do it all the time and still now we fantasize,

0:23:14.080 --> 0:23:16.720
<v Speaker 1>but I don't. I've never come close to like really

0:23:17.520 --> 0:23:23.560
<v Speaker 1>that that feeling of safety and family feeling with my child.

0:23:23.760 --> 0:23:27.159
<v Speaker 1>So I want that. I really really want that for

0:23:27.240 --> 0:23:30.920
<v Speaker 1>me and for her. So I'm calling that in and

0:23:31.800 --> 0:23:34.240
<v Speaker 1>I think that the well, the work that I've done,

0:23:34.280 --> 0:23:37.160
<v Speaker 1>and also just like the protection of my energy, my womb,

0:23:37.359 --> 0:23:41.240
<v Speaker 1>is I fucking nobody until I know for sure that

0:23:41.440 --> 0:23:44.240
<v Speaker 1>this person is going to be able to provide that

0:23:44.320 --> 0:23:47.040
<v Speaker 1>type of safety for me and my daughter, and also

0:23:47.080 --> 0:23:53.160
<v Speaker 1>my family too, because it's like a blending of more

0:23:53.200 --> 0:23:55.440
<v Speaker 1>than just you and your daughter. It's like if you're

0:23:55.480 --> 0:23:58.880
<v Speaker 1>really hopefully, if you're if you have the family dynamic,

0:23:58.960 --> 0:24:03.080
<v Speaker 1>it's a blending of family well. And I don't take

0:24:03.080 --> 0:24:05.240
<v Speaker 1>that lightly either. I think my mom has been waiting

0:24:05.240 --> 0:24:07.280
<v Speaker 1>for that. She's like, when the fuck are you gonna

0:24:07.440 --> 0:24:10.480
<v Speaker 1>bring the guy that like brings the families together. And

0:24:10.520 --> 0:24:12.720
<v Speaker 1>I'm like, I don't know, Mom.

0:24:13.000 --> 0:24:14.399
<v Speaker 2>We live in such a time where it's like do

0:24:14.440 --> 0:24:15.440
<v Speaker 2>the people do that anymore?

0:24:15.480 --> 0:24:17.560
<v Speaker 1>I do? I know, but I think I think we

0:24:17.680 --> 0:24:18.040
<v Speaker 1>have been.

0:24:18.200 --> 0:24:22.080
<v Speaker 2>We're so heavily exposed, and like we're so heavily exposed,

0:24:22.119 --> 0:24:24.200
<v Speaker 2>and like right, now, for some reason, there's so much

0:24:24.520 --> 0:24:28.320
<v Speaker 2>there's so much conversation and like emphasis on nigga's not

0:24:28.359 --> 0:24:31.760
<v Speaker 2>wanting to settle down and polyamorous relationships. And I know

0:24:32.119 --> 0:24:34.399
<v Speaker 2>we've preached a lot of open relationship rhetoric in the

0:24:34.440 --> 0:24:37.800
<v Speaker 2>beginning of our careers as podcasters, but we're here to

0:24:37.840 --> 0:24:42.240
<v Speaker 2>say we are married wife like women. Okay, not to

0:24:42.280 --> 0:24:44.280
<v Speaker 2>say that poly people are not married. I'm just saying

0:24:44.320 --> 0:24:46.679
<v Speaker 2>that I'm here to tell you, and I'm here to

0:24:46.680 --> 0:24:51.160
<v Speaker 2>tell you, friend from a woman who was resistant as

0:24:51.200 --> 0:24:54.160
<v Speaker 2>hell to safety even though I asked for it, that

0:24:54.320 --> 0:24:56.840
<v Speaker 2>you do deserve it, and it is out there, and

0:24:56.920 --> 0:25:00.440
<v Speaker 2>there is a man who's mature and emotionally evolved, who

0:25:00.560 --> 0:25:04.280
<v Speaker 2>is fun and freaky and actually wants to step up

0:25:04.400 --> 0:25:07.399
<v Speaker 2>and be a husband and be a father and be

0:25:07.440 --> 0:25:09.879
<v Speaker 2>a father figure and is going to support and protect

0:25:09.960 --> 0:25:12.480
<v Speaker 2>you and you know, provide for you in ways that

0:25:12.480 --> 0:25:14.600
<v Speaker 2>you didn't even think of, and like build with you.

0:25:15.000 --> 0:25:17.200
<v Speaker 2>Like you deserve that, and it's out there and waiting

0:25:17.200 --> 0:25:19.399
<v Speaker 2>for you. And I'm so glad that you're in this

0:25:19.520 --> 0:25:23.200
<v Speaker 2>chapter where you're seeing that for yourself and like separating

0:25:23.240 --> 0:25:26.720
<v Speaker 2>and really detaching from niggas who are not ready, because

0:25:26.720 --> 0:25:29.480
<v Speaker 2>it does require that you kind of look out the

0:25:29.480 --> 0:25:31.520
<v Speaker 2>rear view and be like, I'm out, nigga to be

0:25:31.600 --> 0:25:34.639
<v Speaker 2>onto the next and go over that mountaintop and really

0:25:34.720 --> 0:25:37.679
<v Speaker 2>see the meadows and the valleys and the beautiful like

0:25:37.800 --> 0:25:40.479
<v Speaker 2>paradise that awaits you. So I think like a lot

0:25:40.520 --> 0:25:43.240
<v Speaker 2>of women are sold this bullshit that like no man's

0:25:43.240 --> 0:25:45.080
<v Speaker 2>coming to save you and your kids, or nobody wants

0:25:45.119 --> 0:25:47.280
<v Speaker 2>you because you have a kid. But I got news

0:25:47.320 --> 0:25:50.560
<v Speaker 2>for you, Okay. The nigga is out there, okay, And

0:25:50.640 --> 0:25:52.760
<v Speaker 2>he will rub your feet, and he will teach your

0:25:52.800 --> 0:25:54.320
<v Speaker 2>kids how to ride a bike, and he will cook

0:25:54.359 --> 0:25:56.280
<v Speaker 2>you dinner, and he will help, and he will show

0:25:56.359 --> 0:25:58.000
<v Speaker 2>up for you in the way that you deserve and

0:25:58.040 --> 0:26:00.240
<v Speaker 2>that you need and that you've been longing for, and

0:26:00.280 --> 0:26:02.520
<v Speaker 2>the way you see the white ladies live happily ever

0:26:02.600 --> 0:26:04.919
<v Speaker 2>after on TV, Like, you also deserve that, and you

0:26:04.960 --> 0:26:08.640
<v Speaker 2>also can have that as long as you are committed

0:26:08.760 --> 0:26:10.600
<v Speaker 2>to what it is that you know that you deserve

0:26:10.960 --> 0:26:14.359
<v Speaker 2>and not bullshitting and fucking around on the fuck around

0:26:14.760 --> 0:26:15.680
<v Speaker 2>with these fucking arounds.

0:26:17.400 --> 0:26:20.239
<v Speaker 1>Are you pointing at me? No, no, no, no, are

0:26:20.240 --> 0:26:22.560
<v Speaker 1>you pointing at me? Pointing at you? Bitch.

0:26:23.400 --> 0:26:25.399
<v Speaker 2>So if you're wasting your time on a nigga who's

0:26:25.400 --> 0:26:28.760
<v Speaker 2>not the stepdaddy type, stop scrolling on Instagram with the

0:26:28.880 --> 0:26:33.080
<v Speaker 2>gender wars and let that nigga go and you know,

0:26:33.240 --> 0:26:36.560
<v Speaker 2>move on to someone who's actually evolved and deserving of you. Immature.

0:26:37.040 --> 0:26:39.240
<v Speaker 2>And with that said, today's affirmation. I know a lot

0:26:39.240 --> 0:26:42.919
<v Speaker 2>of women, A lot of my female friends obsess and

0:26:43.000 --> 0:26:46.920
<v Speaker 2>stress over not having relationships or the search of or

0:26:46.920 --> 0:26:49.680
<v Speaker 2>they're not being enough men. And I just I realized,

0:26:49.680 --> 0:26:53.240
<v Speaker 2>even for myself, I say I'm stressed all the time.

0:26:53.400 --> 0:26:55.240
<v Speaker 2>And I saw a meme and it was like, I'm

0:26:55.280 --> 0:27:00.760
<v Speaker 2>not stressed, I'm under divine pressure. I'm not sure I'm

0:27:00.840 --> 0:27:04.480
<v Speaker 2>under divine pressure because I'm a bit who says I'm

0:27:04.480 --> 0:27:07.240
<v Speaker 2>stressed a lot, like a lot, to the point where

0:27:07.480 --> 0:27:09.000
<v Speaker 2>I've heard my daughter say it and I was like,

0:27:09.040 --> 0:27:12.040
<v Speaker 2>oh god, yeah, so it's.

0:27:11.960 --> 0:27:14.120
<v Speaker 1>Just like Kitty is stressed. It's stressing me out right now.

0:27:14.400 --> 0:27:17.159
<v Speaker 1>One yeah, it's on the way to coming out. Let

0:27:17.200 --> 0:27:17.560
<v Speaker 1>me tuger.

0:27:20.560 --> 0:27:23.760
<v Speaker 2>But I'm not stressed. I'm under divine pressure because it's

0:27:23.840 --> 0:27:26.480
<v Speaker 2>just a perspective shift. There's a lot of men you

0:27:26.560 --> 0:27:28.399
<v Speaker 2>just haven't found yours, you know, and there's a lot

0:27:28.440 --> 0:27:30.520
<v Speaker 2>of great men. You just have to be open defining

0:27:30.520 --> 0:27:32.280
<v Speaker 2>yours and not wasting time on the bullshit.

0:27:32.640 --> 0:27:34.640
<v Speaker 1>So we're not stressed. Even us we.

0:27:34.680 --> 0:27:37.720
<v Speaker 2>Be under divine pressure because any pressure that we have

0:27:38.560 --> 0:27:40.960
<v Speaker 2>is fine. It's so divine because we asked for it.

0:27:41.160 --> 0:27:43.080
<v Speaker 2>And that's the thing is like, the divine pressure is

0:27:43.080 --> 0:27:45.520
<v Speaker 2>sometimes the things that we didn't realize we asked for

0:27:45.640 --> 0:27:47.840
<v Speaker 2>are here, but they're showing up with a little bit

0:27:47.880 --> 0:27:48.400
<v Speaker 2>of pressure.

0:27:48.680 --> 0:27:50.400
<v Speaker 1>And now you're like, ahh, but.

0:27:50.480 --> 0:27:53.280
<v Speaker 2>Yes, bitch, even in relationships that you dream of, when

0:27:53.280 --> 0:27:56.360
<v Speaker 2>you manifest, there will be divine pressure, you know, and

0:27:56.359 --> 0:28:00.760
<v Speaker 2>and so like change your perspective so that when it comes,

0:28:00.760 --> 0:28:03.240
<v Speaker 2>you're not overwhelming yourself in some bullshit and some delusion

0:28:03.320 --> 0:28:06.520
<v Speaker 2>illusion that it's negative when actually it's exactly your Your

0:28:06.600 --> 0:28:09.000
<v Speaker 2>dreams are coming true. And that's why it's a little

0:28:09.040 --> 0:28:09.560
<v Speaker 2>bit of pressure.

0:28:09.560 --> 0:28:09.760
<v Speaker 1>Bitch.

0:28:09.800 --> 0:28:14.640
<v Speaker 2>You gotta make moves. But I have a surprise for you.

0:28:14.640 --> 0:28:14.840
<v Speaker 3>You do.

0:28:15.240 --> 0:28:19.440
<v Speaker 2>Yes, we've been talking about our love and about manifesting

0:28:19.520 --> 0:28:23.720
<v Speaker 2>healthy love, and today we have a very special tarot time.

0:28:24.000 --> 0:28:27.200
<v Speaker 1>Oh my gosh, is it star magic. We are going

0:28:27.240 --> 0:28:28.200
<v Speaker 1>on a field.

0:28:27.920 --> 0:28:34.320
<v Speaker 2>Tress that it was so valid field dress so I

0:28:34.359 --> 0:28:38.440
<v Speaker 2>have a friend downstairs in a magic Star Magic school

0:28:38.440 --> 0:28:42.960
<v Speaker 2>bus and she's here to do Yeah.

0:28:43.120 --> 0:28:46.440
<v Speaker 1>Oh my gosh, we're doing Tarot Time outside of the studio. Yeah,

0:28:46.600 --> 0:28:50.239
<v Speaker 1>slash in the studio. Yeah, okay, all right, well let's go.

0:29:14.280 --> 0:29:17.480
<v Speaker 2>Welcome to Tarot Time, and today is a very special

0:29:17.520 --> 0:29:20.600
<v Speaker 2>Tarot Time because we are joined by a very special guest.

0:29:20.960 --> 0:29:25.800
<v Speaker 1>We are on Star Magic school Bus, which we're so

0:29:25.840 --> 0:29:29.720
<v Speaker 1>grateful for, Ashley, your favorite traveling psychic who we happened

0:29:29.720 --> 0:29:32.320
<v Speaker 1>to meet randomly in studio city. Shout out to all

0:29:32.320 --> 0:29:33.760
<v Speaker 1>the Valley girls in the world who know where the

0:29:33.760 --> 0:29:39.880
<v Speaker 1>fuck that is. It was one eleven actually on the day,

0:29:39.920 --> 0:29:42.240
<v Speaker 1>and I was walking outside. We had just finished actually

0:29:42.240 --> 0:29:45.120
<v Speaker 1>our last episode that you guys checked out. Take a hike, bitch, bitch,

0:29:45.120 --> 0:29:48.520
<v Speaker 1>take a hike or take a hike, bitch, and I

0:29:48.560 --> 0:29:52.080
<v Speaker 1>happened to see this amazing school bus parked outside and

0:29:52.160 --> 0:29:54.480
<v Speaker 1>said Tarot. It said Reiki Apothecary. I was like, let

0:29:54.520 --> 0:29:55.720
<v Speaker 1>me go in here and see what the fike is

0:29:55.720 --> 0:29:57.600
<v Speaker 1>going on in here. And then I peeked in and

0:29:57.640 --> 0:30:00.239
<v Speaker 1>there was this beautiful black woman sitting in here. If

0:30:00.240 --> 0:30:01.640
<v Speaker 1>you were from the valley, you know you see the

0:30:01.680 --> 0:30:06.080
<v Speaker 1>Black Girls, we like, hello, Hi, So I was like, Okay,

0:30:06.120 --> 0:30:08.920
<v Speaker 1>I'm gonna come back here. And after we ate, we

0:30:09.000 --> 0:30:11.480
<v Speaker 1>came on the bus and we had an amazing reading

0:30:11.520 --> 0:30:15.080
<v Speaker 1>by you. Thank you, and so you know, good moms

0:30:15.120 --> 0:30:17.120
<v Speaker 1>like what we're good for. We'll come in and be

0:30:17.200 --> 0:30:20.440
<v Speaker 1>like hey. So we were thinking can we shoot an

0:30:20.440 --> 0:30:23.920
<v Speaker 1>episode on her, a little segment of Tarot time, And

0:30:24.160 --> 0:30:26.200
<v Speaker 1>we're so grateful you said yes. And I'm just so

0:30:26.240 --> 0:30:29.360
<v Speaker 1>happy to share what you do and this beautiful space

0:30:29.400 --> 0:30:31.320
<v Speaker 1>that you've created with our audience.

0:30:31.360 --> 0:30:32.880
<v Speaker 4>So thank you, thank you.

0:30:33.240 --> 0:30:36.320
<v Speaker 5>I'm so excited to be here and for this session

0:30:36.720 --> 0:30:41.120
<v Speaker 5>and for the opportunity to share, so thank you.

0:30:41.720 --> 0:30:43.800
<v Speaker 1>Before we start, I just have just a few questions

0:30:43.840 --> 0:30:46.280
<v Speaker 1>because we didn't even really get to ask you anything, right,

0:30:46.640 --> 0:30:48.880
<v Speaker 1>How did you get into taro? Oh? Wow?

0:30:49.080 --> 0:30:52.360
<v Speaker 5>So I've always been ever since I was a kid,

0:30:52.360 --> 0:30:58.280
<v Speaker 5>I've always been obsessed with tarot, magic, astrology, everything that

0:30:58.360 --> 0:31:01.960
<v Speaker 5>has to do with the metaphysical esoteric space. And I've

0:31:01.960 --> 0:31:07.480
<v Speaker 5>always been intuitive, but I didn't necessarily trust my own

0:31:07.520 --> 0:31:13.280
<v Speaker 5>intuition growing up, and it wasn't until I had oh gosh,

0:31:13.320 --> 0:31:16.360
<v Speaker 5>I would say my first like serious dark knight of

0:31:16.400 --> 0:31:19.840
<v Speaker 5>the Dark Night of the Soul Spiritual Awakening or conscious

0:31:19.880 --> 0:31:25.160
<v Speaker 5>spiritual awakening, which was back in twenty eighteen, a little

0:31:25.200 --> 0:31:31.400
<v Speaker 5>after my Staturn return. Actually it was incredible, like that

0:31:31.440 --> 0:31:36.760
<v Speaker 5>first Mercury retrograde, I ran into eleven people from my

0:31:36.880 --> 0:31:39.240
<v Speaker 5>past in a span of like two and a half weeks,

0:31:39.240 --> 0:31:41.840
<v Speaker 5>and I got really freaked out and realized the universe

0:31:41.960 --> 0:31:45.880
<v Speaker 5>was trying to send me a message. And so I

0:31:46.920 --> 0:31:51.000
<v Speaker 5>guess that really sprung me into my spiritual path, where

0:31:51.040 --> 0:31:56.400
<v Speaker 5>I found like a daily practice of grounding, meditation, journaling affirmations.

0:31:56.480 --> 0:32:00.239
<v Speaker 5>And during that process, the meditation really opened me up

0:32:00.280 --> 0:32:05.360
<v Speaker 5>to start receiving messages and downloads and visions, and I

0:32:05.400 --> 0:32:12.840
<v Speaker 5>also developed an interest in herbalism and taro. But really

0:32:13.400 --> 0:32:16.320
<v Speaker 5>I got sober that year, so instead of and it's

0:32:16.320 --> 0:32:19.360
<v Speaker 5>funny because ironically, I'd purchased my first tarot deck the

0:32:19.440 --> 0:32:22.840
<v Speaker 5>year prior, in twenty seventeen, so I messed around with it,

0:32:22.920 --> 0:32:25.320
<v Speaker 5>put it away, and then twenty eighteen happened. All of

0:32:25.320 --> 0:32:29.680
<v Speaker 5>that happened, and instead of going out for New Year's Eve,

0:32:29.720 --> 0:32:32.800
<v Speaker 5>I decided to stay home and watch videos on YouTube

0:32:32.840 --> 0:32:37.320
<v Speaker 5>about numerology, and that sort of spiraled into taro and

0:32:38.240 --> 0:32:40.560
<v Speaker 5>I just ended up knowing the meanings of the cards,

0:32:40.640 --> 0:32:45.400
<v Speaker 5>like without even setting the intention of working with them myself,

0:32:45.920 --> 0:32:46.840
<v Speaker 5>and realized like.

0:32:46.920 --> 0:32:48.760
<v Speaker 4>Oh, I need to do this.

0:32:49.040 --> 0:32:51.040
<v Speaker 5>And so at first when I first started reading, I

0:32:51.080 --> 0:32:54.760
<v Speaker 5>was just offering free readings with the purchase of intention

0:32:54.880 --> 0:32:57.720
<v Speaker 5>candles that I make. And then people just became more

0:32:57.760 --> 0:32:59.800
<v Speaker 5>interested in the taro than the candles, and the taro

0:32:59.880 --> 0:33:02.040
<v Speaker 5>just kind of took off and here we are.

0:33:02.280 --> 0:33:04.160
<v Speaker 1>Amazing, and then it made this beautiful bus.

0:33:04.200 --> 0:33:05.640
<v Speaker 4>And then I made this beautiful bus.

0:33:06.480 --> 0:33:09.320
<v Speaker 1>Wow, this is pretty big deal. This is a beautiful bus.

0:33:09.440 --> 0:33:13.600
<v Speaker 1>Thank you? Are you like a DIY queen like interior designer?

0:33:13.760 --> 0:33:18.160
<v Speaker 5>This is all DIY, no interior design background, no construction background,

0:33:18.440 --> 0:33:22.440
<v Speaker 5>just a lot of basically YouTube university YouTube the.

0:33:22.440 --> 0:33:26.920
<v Speaker 1>Shit out of this. The bus is busting. Okay.

0:33:27.200 --> 0:33:29.600
<v Speaker 2>It is like a little enchanted garden on wheels.

0:33:29.800 --> 0:33:33.840
<v Speaker 5>Yeah, that was my vision, and I didn't like, I

0:33:33.840 --> 0:33:36.239
<v Speaker 5>didn't initially know that I was going to do a

0:33:36.280 --> 0:33:38.880
<v Speaker 5>bus like it started out with just like I said,

0:33:38.920 --> 0:33:39.520
<v Speaker 5>the candles.

0:33:39.600 --> 0:33:40.560
<v Speaker 6>Then word of mouth.

0:33:40.880 --> 0:33:44.480
<v Speaker 5>Eventually I ended up reading in shops like metaphysical shops

0:33:44.520 --> 0:33:49.520
<v Speaker 5>all over LA. And my first shop experience was really

0:33:49.560 --> 0:33:52.400
<v Speaker 5>traumatizing and that's what let me know. Oh, I need

0:33:52.440 --> 0:33:55.400
<v Speaker 5>to create my own space. And being a Sage Moon,

0:33:55.480 --> 0:33:56.920
<v Speaker 5>I was like, okay, I gotta be mobile.

0:33:56.960 --> 0:34:01.760
<v Speaker 1>I don't Sage Moon. Yeah, this is beautiful.

0:34:01.760 --> 0:34:05.400
<v Speaker 2>I'm with you know, I'm with the innovative girl boss

0:34:05.480 --> 0:34:08.480
<v Speaker 2>independent ideas, and this is definitely.

0:34:08.440 --> 0:34:09.200
<v Speaker 1>It, darling.

0:34:09.360 --> 0:34:11.359
<v Speaker 2>So I'm very honored that you allowed us to come

0:34:11.360 --> 0:34:13.600
<v Speaker 2>into your space for a little while for an afternoon,

0:34:14.120 --> 0:34:15.520
<v Speaker 2>and Tarot is down.

0:34:15.880 --> 0:34:19.440
<v Speaker 1>It's beautiful, it's raining, and it feels nice and cozy in.

0:34:19.440 --> 0:34:21.320
<v Speaker 6>Here, and it feels kind of witchy.

0:34:21.600 --> 0:34:23.719
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, we weren't our witchy outfits because me and Eric

0:34:23.760 --> 0:34:27.120
<v Speaker 2>I cannot help but to match every accident every week.

0:34:30.800 --> 0:34:34.239
<v Speaker 1>Well, shall we get to it? I think? So it's

0:34:34.239 --> 0:34:34.960
<v Speaker 1>Tarot time.

0:34:36.120 --> 0:34:38.600
<v Speaker 6>Amazing. Okay, So who's going first?

0:34:39.560 --> 0:34:43.399
<v Speaker 1>Jamila? Jamila? I volunteer you as tribute my dear got it?

0:34:43.800 --> 0:34:46.560
<v Speaker 6>Do you have any specific questions or concerns?

0:34:47.840 --> 0:34:48.719
<v Speaker 1>No concerns.

0:34:49.400 --> 0:34:52.280
<v Speaker 2>I'm just you know, I know that people are nosy

0:34:52.560 --> 0:34:53.799
<v Speaker 2>and ex give me.

0:34:53.880 --> 0:34:54.800
<v Speaker 1>I want to love reading.

0:34:54.960 --> 0:34:57.640
<v Speaker 2>Tell me about my relationship and where it's going and

0:34:57.640 --> 0:35:00.719
<v Speaker 2>what I have in store, and you know, like and

0:35:00.800 --> 0:35:01.399
<v Speaker 2>things like that.

0:35:01.600 --> 0:35:03.920
<v Speaker 1>Just like just put it on, put it on me publicly.

0:35:04.360 --> 0:35:06.120
<v Speaker 6>Okay, great, I love it.

0:35:06.400 --> 0:35:08.839
<v Speaker 5>So first I'll ground our energy with this singing bowl.

0:35:08.840 --> 0:35:10.680
<v Speaker 5>Feel free to close your eyes and take a deep breath.

0:35:15.280 --> 0:35:15.440
<v Speaker 1>Mm.

0:35:36.080 --> 0:35:37.879
<v Speaker 6>Okay, and Jamila, what's your last name?

0:35:38.400 --> 0:35:40.759
<v Speaker 1>Map? M App Map?

0:35:41.560 --> 0:35:44.360
<v Speaker 5>I'll say a quick prayer, Father, Mother, God, Spirit, Universe,

0:35:44.480 --> 0:35:47.680
<v Speaker 5>my angels and guide's, the highest spiritual beings, Sudden, my unfusors,

0:35:47.800 --> 0:35:51.080
<v Speaker 5>my higher self, and all divine entities who love me unconditionally.

0:35:51.520 --> 0:35:55.840
<v Speaker 5>I call upon you for unconditional love, grace, compassion, healing, guidance, protection,

0:35:55.920 --> 0:35:59.080
<v Speaker 5>assistant support. Was some clarity and insight. Now, thank you

0:35:59.080 --> 0:36:00.799
<v Speaker 5>for blessing my work with to Row, and thank you

0:36:00.840 --> 0:36:03.440
<v Speaker 5>for allowing me to connect with Jamila Mapps energy so

0:36:03.480 --> 0:36:06.400
<v Speaker 5>that we receive clear, concise, accurate, one hundred psvent truthful,

0:36:06.640 --> 0:36:12.680
<v Speaker 5>specific messages pertaining to Jamiala Mapps while being abundance, prosperity, love, joy, relationships, career,

0:36:12.719 --> 0:36:14.839
<v Speaker 5>and any other messages you do Marthy. At this time,

0:36:15.200 --> 0:36:17.440
<v Speaker 5>we open up to receive the healing in gidance Jamila

0:36:17.520 --> 0:36:20.280
<v Speaker 5>Map needs most right now and unconditional love through divine

0:36:20.320 --> 0:36:21.399
<v Speaker 5>grace of our own free will.

0:36:21.480 --> 0:36:21.880
<v Speaker 3>So be it.

0:36:22.400 --> 0:36:24.920
<v Speaker 5>Spirit Please tell us what does the future have in

0:36:25.040 --> 0:36:29.480
<v Speaker 5>store for Jamila Maps love Live. What does the future

0:36:29.520 --> 0:36:32.799
<v Speaker 5>have in store for Jamela Mapp regarding love? What does

0:36:32.840 --> 0:36:35.840
<v Speaker 5>the future have in store for Jamala Mapp regarding love.

0:36:43.239 --> 0:36:44.160
<v Speaker 1>More? I don't know.

0:36:44.239 --> 0:36:47.719
<v Speaker 2>Suddenly feels way more intense because yeah, thousands of people

0:36:47.760 --> 0:36:48.240
<v Speaker 2>are listening.

0:36:48.320 --> 0:36:49.400
<v Speaker 1>I feel heavy.

0:36:49.600 --> 0:36:51.480
<v Speaker 4>We'll see what comes up.

0:36:56.640 --> 0:37:01.840
<v Speaker 5>Sexy cards, Yeah, I work with Pictaro Sexual Magic for

0:37:02.000 --> 0:37:03.280
<v Speaker 5>love questions.

0:37:03.800 --> 0:37:05.279
<v Speaker 6>I want a black love deck though.

0:37:05.440 --> 0:37:06.879
<v Speaker 1>On me too, I'm like, do we need to make one?

0:37:06.880 --> 0:37:09.800
<v Speaker 1>Because I've had to Angla.

0:37:09.840 --> 0:37:12.920
<v Speaker 6>I've had this on my heart, like, make me a

0:37:12.960 --> 0:37:17.200
<v Speaker 6>black love deck for years now.

0:37:17.920 --> 0:37:20.600
<v Speaker 5>I just am so busy that I don't have the

0:37:20.719 --> 0:37:22.520
<v Speaker 5>time to like or I haven't had the time.

0:37:22.920 --> 0:37:25.520
<v Speaker 2>There are not enough tarot decks with like black and

0:37:25.560 --> 0:37:28.200
<v Speaker 2>brown images. Shout out to Mahogany Taro that we always use.

0:37:28.360 --> 0:37:31.600
<v Speaker 6>Yes, I love her deck because you have to feel

0:37:31.640 --> 0:37:31.799
<v Speaker 6>like you.

0:37:31.760 --> 0:37:45.239
<v Speaker 1>Can connect to it. Oh not not try that out

0:37:45.320 --> 0:37:47.040
<v Speaker 1>a game one.

0:37:48.760 --> 0:37:53.480
<v Speaker 6>That's interesting. Okay. Should I keep pulling or just leave

0:37:53.520 --> 0:37:54.000
<v Speaker 6>it at six?

0:37:55.239 --> 0:38:01.200
<v Speaker 1>Whichever you feel I'll pull three more, Okay.

0:38:01.520 --> 0:38:04.880
<v Speaker 5>So I could be picking up on your energy or

0:38:05.000 --> 0:38:08.200
<v Speaker 5>energy around you, So just take it as a resonance.

0:38:08.239 --> 0:38:08.880
<v Speaker 1>Okay, Okay.

0:38:10.360 --> 0:38:12.600
<v Speaker 5>The overall energy is the aid of Wands. So the

0:38:12.640 --> 0:38:15.680
<v Speaker 5>wands rule passion, fire, creativity, and action. The eight of

0:38:15.760 --> 0:38:20.920
<v Speaker 5>Wands has to do with moving quickly, fast movement, travel fast,

0:38:21.040 --> 0:38:27.799
<v Speaker 5>intense communication, even possibly digitally, and also just having like

0:38:28.600 --> 0:38:35.040
<v Speaker 5>you know, an expanded reach with the aid of wands.

0:38:35.080 --> 0:38:37.440
<v Speaker 5>So it feels like, as this is the overall energy,

0:38:37.440 --> 0:38:40.200
<v Speaker 5>there's something in your relationship that is moving very quickly,

0:38:41.040 --> 0:38:45.040
<v Speaker 5>lots of passion, so that's great, spicy, Okay. We have

0:38:45.239 --> 0:38:48.000
<v Speaker 5>the Queen of sorry, excuse me, the King of Wands

0:38:48.040 --> 0:38:51.960
<v Speaker 5>in reverse, the Night of Cops in reverse okay, and

0:38:52.000 --> 0:38:57.279
<v Speaker 5>the Page of Cops in reverse. So the King of

0:38:57.320 --> 0:39:01.360
<v Speaker 5>Wands is divine masculine energy when he's upright, this is

0:39:01.360 --> 0:39:08.000
<v Speaker 5>someone who's a leader, who takes charge, who's passionate, very yeah, passionate, sexual,

0:39:08.200 --> 0:39:11.920
<v Speaker 5>very attractive, very attractive.

0:39:16.280 --> 0:39:20.480
<v Speaker 1>Don't suot Orlando's horn too much. Okay, looks, but it's reverse.

0:39:22.480 --> 0:39:25.200
<v Speaker 5>So it's it's reverse. And then you have the Night

0:39:25.200 --> 0:39:27.440
<v Speaker 5>of Cups in reverse and the Page of Cops in reverse.

0:39:27.640 --> 0:39:30.359
<v Speaker 5>So this feels like someone that's actually not in your

0:39:30.480 --> 0:39:33.919
<v Speaker 5>orbit right now. That's maybe it feels like it's someone

0:39:33.960 --> 0:39:34.640
<v Speaker 5>from the past.

0:39:34.760 --> 0:39:37.640
<v Speaker 2>Really, I just want to keep every preference everybody by

0:39:37.680 --> 0:39:39.520
<v Speaker 2>knowing that not only am I doing a love reading

0:39:39.520 --> 0:39:42.879
<v Speaker 2>in front of thousands of people, but my boyfriend is

0:39:42.920 --> 0:39:43.520
<v Speaker 2>sitting here.

0:39:43.800 --> 0:39:44.040
<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

0:39:44.239 --> 0:39:45.440
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, this is really brave.

0:39:49.640 --> 0:39:52.080
<v Speaker 5>It feels so with the King of Wants showing up

0:39:52.080 --> 0:39:56.640
<v Speaker 5>in reverse, this is someone who is not taking action,

0:39:57.280 --> 0:40:01.560
<v Speaker 5>and something about him actually feels really like and enraged.

0:40:03.719 --> 0:40:08.880
<v Speaker 5>Someone who is upset, Okay, and they have a lot

0:40:08.960 --> 0:40:13.319
<v Speaker 5>of suppressed emotions, and it's because they feel upset because

0:40:13.360 --> 0:40:16.000
<v Speaker 5>they haven't maybe they feel like they missed out on

0:40:16.040 --> 0:40:19.239
<v Speaker 5>their chance or they haven't, like and I want to

0:40:19.239 --> 0:40:23.000
<v Speaker 5>cry too, They haven't. They didn't do what they could

0:40:23.040 --> 0:40:25.680
<v Speaker 5>have done, or what they what they knew you wanted

0:40:26.080 --> 0:40:30.080
<v Speaker 5>them to do, or what they knew what was best

0:40:30.320 --> 0:40:32.760
<v Speaker 5>for you at the time that they had their chance.

0:40:33.160 --> 0:40:38.799
<v Speaker 5>So it feels like someone who is holding holding on

0:40:38.960 --> 0:40:41.120
<v Speaker 5>can't let go of the past. Honestly, especially with this

0:40:41.200 --> 0:40:45.200
<v Speaker 5>four Pinnacles here, the King of Cops is in Sorry,

0:40:45.320 --> 0:40:48.719
<v Speaker 5>excuse me, god, I keep miss speaking. Usually when I misspeak,

0:40:48.719 --> 0:40:52.040
<v Speaker 5>there's something to it, But I'm gonna move on. The

0:40:52.160 --> 0:40:55.160
<v Speaker 5>Night of Coups in reverse is also like an energy

0:40:55.200 --> 0:41:01.360
<v Speaker 5>that just is insincere, insincere, not genuine. And then the

0:41:01.400 --> 0:41:04.080
<v Speaker 5>cups will the heart space, love, compassion, emotion, joy, and intuition.

0:41:04.200 --> 0:41:05.880
<v Speaker 5>So when the Night of Cops is upright, this is

0:41:05.920 --> 0:41:12.720
<v Speaker 5>someone who's very heart led, heart centered, dreamy, romantic, secret

0:41:12.760 --> 0:41:16.000
<v Speaker 5>admire type of energy. But it's in reverse, so it

0:41:16.000 --> 0:41:18.600
<v Speaker 5>feels like someone who doesn't have or who didn't have

0:41:18.640 --> 0:41:22.759
<v Speaker 5>the best intentions and also just isn't emotionally mature. And

0:41:22.800 --> 0:41:25.880
<v Speaker 5>then with the Page of Cops in reverse, when it's upright,

0:41:26.040 --> 0:41:30.040
<v Speaker 5>it's an offering a small gesture of love. It could

0:41:30.080 --> 0:41:32.040
<v Speaker 5>be and I love you and I'm sorry and I

0:41:32.120 --> 0:41:35.640
<v Speaker 5>forgive you, but it's in reverse. So it's like this person,

0:41:36.000 --> 0:41:37.120
<v Speaker 5>it feels like they.

0:41:37.040 --> 0:41:45.680
<v Speaker 6>Want to come forward to share, share their regrets, apologize.

0:41:46.680 --> 0:41:47.120
<v Speaker 1>Beyond.

0:41:47.600 --> 0:41:49.200
<v Speaker 5>I mean, it doesn't even feel like they want to

0:41:49.200 --> 0:41:53.480
<v Speaker 5>be honest, but it's like all of these things.

0:41:51.560 --> 0:41:54.320
<v Speaker 4>That that that they've felt.

0:41:54.400 --> 0:41:57.960
<v Speaker 5>It feels like now they're becoming aware, aware of it,

0:41:58.400 --> 0:42:01.239
<v Speaker 5>but they're not acting on it, and it has them

0:42:01.360 --> 0:42:04.160
<v Speaker 5>very upset. And it feels like they're upset because they're.

0:42:04.000 --> 0:42:04.680
<v Speaker 6>Seeing you.

0:42:07.520 --> 0:42:12.640
<v Speaker 5>Move on with the eight of Ones as your overall energy.

0:42:12.840 --> 0:42:15.200
<v Speaker 5>You have the seven of Ones, the Lovers and the

0:42:15.239 --> 0:42:18.800
<v Speaker 5>Three of Pentacles. Okay, so the Seven of Ones is

0:42:18.840 --> 0:42:22.360
<v Speaker 5>a very protective, defensive energy. It does feel like you're protected,

0:42:22.400 --> 0:42:25.680
<v Speaker 5>it does feel like you are really especially with the

0:42:25.760 --> 0:42:31.560
<v Speaker 5>Nine of Wanes here honoring your boundaries and being protective

0:42:31.800 --> 0:42:34.280
<v Speaker 5>when it comes to this external energy that really doesn't

0:42:34.320 --> 0:42:38.759
<v Speaker 5>have anything to offer, Like the lovers in the heart

0:42:38.800 --> 0:42:42.000
<v Speaker 5>of your reading twin flames soulmate energy, you're protecting your love,

0:42:42.080 --> 0:42:45.360
<v Speaker 5>You're protecting your connection. You do have the Three of Pinnacles.

0:42:45.560 --> 0:42:51.000
<v Speaker 5>The Pinnacles ruled things that are tangible and of the earth, money, career, finances, resources.

0:42:51.160 --> 0:42:55.400
<v Speaker 6>This is a collaborative energy. So this is a stark difference.

0:42:55.040 --> 0:43:00.479
<v Speaker 5>From the King of Wands, Night of Pinnacle Night, Night

0:43:00.600 --> 0:43:05.239
<v Speaker 5>of Cups, Night of Cups, Page of Cups energy. So

0:43:05.280 --> 0:43:09.080
<v Speaker 5>it's like with this Soulmate you're building, you're collaborating.

0:43:09.480 --> 0:43:11.960
<v Speaker 4>This is like competition versus collaboration.

0:43:13.080 --> 0:43:16.080
<v Speaker 5>You have the Nine of Wands, the Four of Panicles,

0:43:16.160 --> 0:43:20.319
<v Speaker 5>and the world in reverse. Now this is interesting. With

0:43:20.440 --> 0:43:24.840
<v Speaker 5>the Nine of Wants, this is wounded warrior, wounded healer energy.

0:43:24.920 --> 0:43:28.600
<v Speaker 5>Someone who's been through a lot, but they're exhausted, they're tired,

0:43:29.360 --> 0:43:30.640
<v Speaker 5>and they're wondering whether or not.

0:43:30.600 --> 0:43:33.600
<v Speaker 6>They can keep they can keep going or move forward.

0:43:33.719 --> 0:43:36.800
<v Speaker 5>The four of panicles, though, suggest that yeah, someone doesn't

0:43:36.840 --> 0:43:39.600
<v Speaker 5>want to move forward, especially with the world in reverse.

0:43:40.280 --> 0:43:43.360
<v Speaker 5>The world of in reverse. I'm hearing something about unfinished business.

0:43:43.520 --> 0:43:46.160
<v Speaker 5>So it feels like in the future, it's like, as

0:43:46.239 --> 0:43:53.160
<v Speaker 5>you continue to build with your soulmates, it feels like

0:43:53.200 --> 0:43:56.640
<v Speaker 5>there will be some sort of challenge to that or

0:43:56.840 --> 0:44:00.160
<v Speaker 5>the person that's watching you live your best life and

0:44:00.239 --> 0:44:06.600
<v Speaker 5>be happy. It feels like there there's a desire to

0:44:06.719 --> 0:44:09.239
<v Speaker 5>hold to hold on, to hold on, and to keep

0:44:09.280 --> 0:44:14.879
<v Speaker 5>you stuck in some sort of cycle. However, Yeah, you're

0:44:14.880 --> 0:44:17.200
<v Speaker 5>moving on. I mean, and you're moving, and you're moving.

0:44:17.400 --> 0:44:18.239
<v Speaker 6>You're moving.

0:44:19.600 --> 0:44:23.000
<v Speaker 4>On and on to bigger, greater things faster.

0:44:23.200 --> 0:44:28.440
<v Speaker 5>A lot of passion here, a lot of passion, passion, creativity, excitement.

0:44:29.640 --> 0:44:30.839
<v Speaker 4>So yeah, just focus on that.

0:44:31.160 --> 0:44:32.640
<v Speaker 6>I don't know why the past is.

0:44:32.560 --> 0:44:35.760
<v Speaker 4>Coming up for like regarding your future.

0:44:36.960 --> 0:44:41.400
<v Speaker 5>However, it feels like even though this person isn't actually

0:44:41.440 --> 0:44:47.400
<v Speaker 5>taking any action, it feels like they have designs.

0:44:47.400 --> 0:44:51.280
<v Speaker 1>Like they're privately, privately just doing doing.

0:44:51.760 --> 0:44:53.239
<v Speaker 6>Yeah, yeah, I can I.

0:44:53.480 --> 0:44:55.040
<v Speaker 1>Can see how this could make sense.

0:44:55.360 --> 0:44:57.279
<v Speaker 2>There's only one person from my past that I could

0:44:57.320 --> 0:45:02.360
<v Speaker 2>think about that would be of any significance and represent

0:45:02.840 --> 0:45:07.960
<v Speaker 2>specifically competition over collaboration. And there's only one person that

0:45:08.000 --> 0:45:16.920
<v Speaker 2>would really have any type of uh control control, and

0:45:16.960 --> 0:45:21.640
<v Speaker 2>that is because we have shared a pressure SKIF, so

0:45:21.800 --> 0:45:24.680
<v Speaker 2>that'd be the only reason. And quite frankly, it's probably

0:45:24.880 --> 0:45:27.240
<v Speaker 2>pretty on point, because I don't know, I've.

0:45:27.080 --> 0:45:28.600
<v Speaker 1>Been feeling that lately a little bit.

0:45:28.960 --> 0:45:30.640
<v Speaker 2>Not that I have a lot of communication because I

0:45:30.680 --> 0:45:35.360
<v Speaker 2>don't because I don't need to, but I can just imagine, honestly,

0:45:35.520 --> 0:45:38.680
<v Speaker 2>like we are living in a very digital world where

0:45:38.680 --> 0:45:42.680
<v Speaker 2>everything is very public and you can see and.

0:45:42.680 --> 0:45:45.480
<v Speaker 1>Checking in on, and this.

0:45:45.400 --> 0:45:48.759
<v Speaker 2>Is someone that I've had a very long relationship with

0:45:49.040 --> 0:45:50.840
<v Speaker 2>that I think probably thought I was always going to

0:45:50.840 --> 0:45:54.160
<v Speaker 2>be around and always be accessible and like able to

0:45:54.160 --> 0:45:57.239
<v Speaker 2>be fucked with, and I'm not. And I think that

0:45:57.320 --> 0:45:59.799
<v Speaker 2>could probably frustrate anybody who thought, like, oh, this is

0:45:59.800 --> 0:46:02.480
<v Speaker 2>how I was going to go down. But again, no

0:46:02.640 --> 0:46:06.880
<v Speaker 2>skill sets to really be honest like wanting something that

0:46:06.880 --> 0:46:09.040
<v Speaker 2>they cannot provide, because there is a lot of hurt.

0:46:09.680 --> 0:46:12.760
<v Speaker 2>And yeah, I feel that, and I feel sad about

0:46:12.920 --> 0:46:14.840
<v Speaker 2>for that person, you know, because at one point we

0:46:14.880 --> 0:46:15.320
<v Speaker 2>were friends.

0:46:15.360 --> 0:46:17.800
<v Speaker 1>But I really realized that they don't have the tools.

0:46:19.040 --> 0:46:22.480
<v Speaker 2>But I think as I glow up and my happiness

0:46:22.600 --> 0:46:26.600
<v Speaker 2>is you know, extended more and more, I feel that

0:46:26.719 --> 0:46:29.960
<v Speaker 2>little bit of like, now are you watching.

0:46:29.560 --> 0:46:32.480
<v Speaker 1>Me but watching a bitch?

0:46:32.600 --> 0:46:32.960
<v Speaker 2>Yeah?

0:46:34.280 --> 0:46:37.480
<v Speaker 1>Right now, Yeah, he's watching you. There's definitely a tether.

0:46:45.760 --> 0:46:49.440
<v Speaker 2>My little podcast, my little I know, my my relationship

0:46:49.640 --> 0:46:52.799
<v Speaker 2>and like how things have blossomed. But the crazy thing

0:46:52.840 --> 0:46:55.319
<v Speaker 2>is that I'm having a vision is like when I

0:46:55.360 --> 0:46:59.239
<v Speaker 2>was struggling for that relationship to work, I remember specifically

0:46:59.280 --> 0:47:01.960
<v Speaker 2>a lot of time as being like, I trust me.

0:47:02.200 --> 0:47:04.560
<v Speaker 2>When I'm done, I'm done, and you're gonna be so

0:47:04.960 --> 0:47:06.279
<v Speaker 2>fucking sorry you did this.

0:47:06.680 --> 0:47:08.560
<v Speaker 1>I kept saying, like you, I'm only gonna do this

0:47:08.600 --> 0:47:10.840
<v Speaker 1>for so long. I kept saying it like only this

0:47:11.040 --> 0:47:12.399
<v Speaker 1>was long. And then when I when I move about

0:47:12.400 --> 0:47:13.520
<v Speaker 1>it here, I'm never looking back.

0:47:13.880 --> 0:47:16.680
<v Speaker 2>And I feel that like that premonition has is coming

0:47:16.719 --> 0:47:19.360
<v Speaker 2>to reality because there's a lot of things that in

0:47:19.400 --> 0:47:22.759
<v Speaker 2>my life that have blossomed, and especially in love, you know,

0:47:22.840 --> 0:47:25.960
<v Speaker 2>in the last two or three years, and I feel

0:47:26.239 --> 0:47:28.279
<v Speaker 2>the disappointment that like, damn, I think that bitch was

0:47:28.320 --> 0:47:29.439
<v Speaker 2>gonna find love.

0:47:30.600 --> 0:47:34.040
<v Speaker 5>So yeah, with this, I would just say, you know,

0:47:34.400 --> 0:47:39.680
<v Speaker 5>continue to protect your energy set those energetic boundaries, because

0:47:39.719 --> 0:47:42.960
<v Speaker 5>even though let's say he has no knowledge of like

0:47:43.880 --> 0:47:48.000
<v Speaker 5>anything having to do with magic or anything like that,

0:47:48.360 --> 0:47:52.040
<v Speaker 5>it's it's still enter the negative potency, and it's still

0:47:52.120 --> 0:47:57.000
<v Speaker 5>potent exactly. And so even if he isn't consciously aware

0:47:57.360 --> 0:48:02.239
<v Speaker 5>of that, like you and and the way you you

0:48:02.280 --> 0:48:05.680
<v Speaker 5>protect yourself is obviously just by continuing to take care

0:48:05.680 --> 0:48:09.960
<v Speaker 5>of yourself right and really indulge in in that love,

0:48:10.080 --> 0:48:12.600
<v Speaker 5>in that passion, in that excitement, in everything that you're

0:48:12.600 --> 0:48:16.560
<v Speaker 5>creating with your life, and sending the attention to.

0:48:17.120 --> 0:48:22.200
<v Speaker 1>Like as for protection in the as it's happening.

0:48:22.320 --> 0:48:24.799
<v Speaker 4>Yes, exactly, nothing to fear.

0:48:24.960 --> 0:48:26.960
<v Speaker 1>No cards, no babies.

0:48:27.880 --> 0:48:31.840
<v Speaker 5>I mean it's not here, but we can ask about it.

0:48:31.800 --> 0:48:36.520
<v Speaker 1>It's that woman.

0:48:37.800 --> 0:48:41.400
<v Speaker 2>No, and I'm on birth control.

0:48:41.480 --> 0:48:44.120
<v Speaker 1>But is there a baby in there?

0:48:45.440 --> 0:48:48.759
<v Speaker 2>I know magic stumps all things, including have.

0:48:48.680 --> 0:48:51.920
<v Speaker 1>A pregnancy pack. There's no babies. Yeah, I don't know.

0:48:52.000 --> 0:48:54.640
<v Speaker 1>Jamaican's firm can do any copper.

0:48:54.800 --> 0:48:59.640
<v Speaker 2>I U G okay, fuck this cop God's gonna get

0:49:00.120 --> 0:49:01.520
<v Speaker 2>make me marry.

0:49:01.680 --> 0:49:03.480
<v Speaker 6>Yeah, this is You're hilarious.

0:49:03.760 --> 0:49:04.560
<v Speaker 1>This is so great.

0:49:05.120 --> 0:49:08.240
<v Speaker 3>Okay, Erica, I think.

0:49:08.120 --> 0:49:10.160
<v Speaker 1>I have a similar question. I want to know more

0:49:10.239 --> 0:49:11.520
<v Speaker 1>about what the.

0:49:12.800 --> 0:49:16.279
<v Speaker 4>It's the death card, which is real that you love that.

0:49:16.440 --> 0:49:19.359
<v Speaker 6>Yeah, it's very scary, right, I mean in this act. Yeah,

0:49:19.480 --> 0:49:22.880
<v Speaker 6>she's just powerful anyway, sorry.

0:49:23.120 --> 0:49:25.600
<v Speaker 1>Similar, just I want to know, like what's what the

0:49:25.640 --> 0:49:30.280
<v Speaker 1>future holds for me? And love and relationships, intimacy, babies.

0:49:30.360 --> 0:49:32.520
<v Speaker 6>Okay, so let's ground our energy.

0:49:32.719 --> 0:49:36.399
<v Speaker 2>We have a pregnancy pack, so yeah, I.

0:49:36.360 --> 0:49:41.200
<v Speaker 1>Get more insight on that. They what here? You ready?

0:49:41.280 --> 0:50:03.160
<v Speaker 3>Yes, okay, close your eyes, take a deep breath, and.

0:50:03.160 --> 0:50:07.680
<v Speaker 5>It's Dickerson right, yes, ma'am, Okay, thank you for allowing

0:50:07.719 --> 0:50:10.799
<v Speaker 5>me to connect with Erica Jefferson's energy so that we

0:50:10.920 --> 0:50:14.920
<v Speaker 5>receive were concise, accurate, one hundred perry full specific messages

0:50:15.080 --> 0:50:20.120
<v Speaker 5>retaining to Erica Dickerson's while being abundance, prosperity, love, joy, relationships, career,

0:50:20.840 --> 0:50:23.000
<v Speaker 5>and any other messages you do already at the time

0:50:23.040 --> 0:50:25.360
<v Speaker 5>we open up to receive the feeling and guidance Erica

0:50:25.400 --> 0:50:28.160
<v Speaker 5>Dickerson needs most of it now on unconditional love through

0:50:28.200 --> 0:50:30.960
<v Speaker 5>divine grace of our own free will. So be it spirit,

0:50:31.000 --> 0:50:33.200
<v Speaker 5>Please tell us what does the future hold for Erica

0:50:33.280 --> 0:50:37.759
<v Speaker 5>Dickerson Regarding love? What does the future hold for Erica

0:50:37.800 --> 0:50:43.160
<v Speaker 5>Dickerson regarding love? What does the future hold for Erica

0:50:43.239 --> 0:50:44.640
<v Speaker 5>Dickerson regarding love?

0:50:48.280 --> 0:50:55.879
<v Speaker 2>Just An Moore, this is the most fancy tear time

0:50:55.920 --> 0:50:56.520
<v Speaker 2>we ever hit.

0:50:58.000 --> 0:50:59.000
<v Speaker 4>All we need is tea.

0:51:00.000 --> 0:51:01.400
<v Speaker 1>Oh she just told me. Iver brought it down.

0:51:05.000 --> 0:51:12.280
<v Speaker 5>The messages are the tea right, and the tea is hot? Okay, spirit,

0:51:12.400 --> 0:51:15.120
<v Speaker 5>What is the future held for Dickerson regarding that?

0:51:17.520 --> 0:51:19.520
<v Speaker 1>I actually might need to come to my birthday party? Okay,

0:51:19.520 --> 0:51:24.920
<v Speaker 1>it's my birthday t I like that. She looks like

0:51:24.960 --> 0:51:27.000
<v Speaker 1>you're outside, but ne have a balcony.

0:51:27.120 --> 0:51:34.040
<v Speaker 3>Okay, r h it's a future okay.

0:51:35.120 --> 0:51:56.360
<v Speaker 1>H m hmm, Okay, it looks like maybe half wolf

0:51:57.000 --> 0:52:02.000
<v Speaker 1>half me what hmm.

0:52:04.520 --> 0:52:10.040
<v Speaker 5>I need to clarify some of these cards, but we'll see.

0:52:13.239 --> 0:52:16.760
<v Speaker 5>So the overall energy is the seven of Wands in reverse.

0:52:18.360 --> 0:52:23.160
<v Speaker 5>So it feels like you're opening up regarding love, which

0:52:23.200 --> 0:52:27.080
<v Speaker 5>is great when it's uprights defensiveness and reverse. This is

0:52:27.480 --> 0:52:35.239
<v Speaker 5>this is letting our defenses down. It also feels like yeah,

0:52:35.320 --> 0:52:38.520
<v Speaker 5>especially with temperance here. This has to do with leaning

0:52:38.600 --> 0:52:42.760
<v Speaker 5>back too. So when the seven of wands is upright,

0:52:42.800 --> 0:52:45.440
<v Speaker 5>this could be like putting up a fight for something.

0:52:46.040 --> 0:52:49.440
<v Speaker 5>In reverse, it's like Okay. Now I'm now, I'm I'm

0:52:49.520 --> 0:52:55.000
<v Speaker 5>leaning back. I'm releasing that energy, maybe even releasing a

0:52:55.080 --> 0:53:03.359
<v Speaker 5>desire to control or releasing attachment to the outcome with

0:53:03.360 --> 0:53:06.080
<v Speaker 5>the Seven of Wands in reverse. Okay, so you have

0:53:06.320 --> 0:53:09.600
<v Speaker 5>the Page of Swords in reverse temperance and the ten

0:53:09.640 --> 0:53:10.360
<v Speaker 5>of Wands.

0:53:12.760 --> 0:53:14.320
<v Speaker 6>So with the Page of Swords.

0:53:13.960 --> 0:53:17.400
<v Speaker 5>In reverse, it feels like this could be your energy

0:53:17.480 --> 0:53:29.640
<v Speaker 5>or someone around you. But it does feel like there's

0:53:31.320 --> 0:53:35.680
<v Speaker 5>there's a lack of either a lack of communication or

0:53:37.239 --> 0:53:39.360
<v Speaker 5>a lack of searching. It feels like a lack of

0:53:39.360 --> 0:53:45.120
<v Speaker 5>searching with the Page of Wanes. Excuse me, ha, Okay,

0:53:45.160 --> 0:53:47.040
<v Speaker 5>so the page of Swords in reverse and me I've

0:53:47.040 --> 0:53:49.240
<v Speaker 5>spoken to the Page of Wands in reverse, which is interesting.

0:53:49.320 --> 0:53:52.040
<v Speaker 5>So the Page of Wands when it's upright, it has

0:53:52.080 --> 0:53:56.799
<v Speaker 5>to do with a spark inspiration. When it comes to love,

0:53:56.920 --> 0:54:00.480
<v Speaker 5>it's like something well, the wanes are very faul so

0:54:01.120 --> 0:54:06.239
<v Speaker 5>you know, uh, a sexual encounter with with with with

0:54:06.280 --> 0:54:08.920
<v Speaker 5>it just being that like what it is as opposed

0:54:08.960 --> 0:54:11.959
<v Speaker 5>to you know, it's it's not going to evolve into

0:54:12.000 --> 0:54:14.439
<v Speaker 5>some affair or something or like a long term thing.

0:54:14.520 --> 0:54:16.560
<v Speaker 5>It's like the Page of WANs, I interpret it's one

0:54:16.640 --> 0:54:19.520
<v Speaker 5>night stands with it in reverse. It's like, okay, coming

0:54:19.520 --> 0:54:24.840
<v Speaker 5>out of that energy, coming out of yeah, of the

0:54:24.920 --> 0:54:28.960
<v Speaker 5>need to look or to be aware of, like who is,

0:54:29.080 --> 0:54:30.800
<v Speaker 5>who's doing what, Who's where?

0:54:31.080 --> 0:54:32.520
<v Speaker 6>Who can I talk to next?

0:54:34.400 --> 0:54:34.680
<v Speaker 1>Yeah?

0:54:34.760 --> 0:54:38.560
<v Speaker 5>Okay, I love that, especially with temperance here, temperance is healing.

0:54:38.640 --> 0:54:42.000
<v Speaker 5>Temperance is alchemy. Temperance is tempering out your emotions, taking

0:54:42.040 --> 0:54:47.560
<v Speaker 5>your time, taking space, taking taking having patience to really

0:54:47.640 --> 0:54:52.279
<v Speaker 5>heal and alchemize whatever burdens negative experiences you had in

0:54:52.640 --> 0:54:56.040
<v Speaker 5>the past and turning that into something, into your strengths,

0:54:56.040 --> 0:54:57.879
<v Speaker 5>into something positive, into something that.

0:54:57.800 --> 0:54:59.040
<v Speaker 4>Serves you your power.

0:55:00.520 --> 0:55:04.600
<v Speaker 5>The Ten of Wands here, Okay, this is interesting because

0:55:04.640 --> 0:55:09.520
<v Speaker 5>the ten of Wands is a lot of fire. It's

0:55:09.520 --> 0:55:12.520
<v Speaker 5>like the ultimate, the max. The ten represents the end

0:55:12.640 --> 0:55:16.160
<v Speaker 5>of a cycle, and so the ten of Ones usually

0:55:16.160 --> 0:55:19.840
<v Speaker 5>it's carrying some sort of burden, and the message associated

0:55:19.880 --> 0:55:21.520
<v Speaker 5>with the card is okay, well it's time to put

0:55:21.520 --> 0:55:22.200
<v Speaker 5>the burden down.

0:55:23.040 --> 0:55:25.920
<v Speaker 6>But it feels like whatever.

0:55:27.560 --> 0:55:31.880
<v Speaker 5>Whatever you've experienced in the past that has been burdensome

0:55:32.160 --> 0:55:37.960
<v Speaker 5>or stressful, you're alchemizing that and that period is over.

0:55:39.320 --> 0:55:39.560
<v Speaker 4>I mean.

0:55:39.560 --> 0:55:41.680
<v Speaker 5>And also there's a lot of passion in the card too,

0:55:41.840 --> 0:55:44.520
<v Speaker 5>So even though you're no longer looking, maybe you're also

0:55:44.680 --> 0:55:50.200
<v Speaker 5>too getting really tuned into your own sexual energy, passion

0:55:50.239 --> 0:55:53.520
<v Speaker 5>and really cultivating that. You have the two of Cups

0:55:53.560 --> 0:55:56.680
<v Speaker 5>in reverse, the nine of Pinnacles in reverse, and the

0:55:56.760 --> 0:56:00.399
<v Speaker 5>four of Swords in reverse. So with the two cups

0:56:00.400 --> 0:56:02.719
<v Speaker 5>in reverse, it feels like you're letting go of a

0:56:02.760 --> 0:56:06.479
<v Speaker 5>past connection here. The two of cups is soulmate twin

0:56:06.520 --> 0:56:08.840
<v Speaker 5>flame energy, or at least for the time.

0:56:08.680 --> 0:56:09.279
<v Speaker 1>Being, you're not.

0:56:09.800 --> 0:56:13.280
<v Speaker 5>You're you're not in alignment with that, with that energy,

0:56:13.719 --> 0:56:18.920
<v Speaker 5>and that has been quite burdensome considering it's following the

0:56:19.000 --> 0:56:21.839
<v Speaker 5>ten of Wands. But again the ten of wanes, it's

0:56:21.840 --> 0:56:25.080
<v Speaker 5>time to put it down right, releasing the burden. You

0:56:25.120 --> 0:56:27.600
<v Speaker 5>do have the nine of Panacles in reverse here, though,

0:56:28.960 --> 0:56:30.360
<v Speaker 5>so the nine of Pentacles when.

0:56:30.200 --> 0:56:31.480
<v Speaker 4>It's upright, has to do.

0:56:31.640 --> 0:56:37.440
<v Speaker 5>It's a very single, independent, self sufficient, confident energy. But

0:56:37.760 --> 0:56:41.759
<v Speaker 5>with it being in reverse, it's like it has more

0:56:41.800 --> 0:56:46.680
<v Speaker 5>to do with being interdependent. So it feels like you

0:56:46.880 --> 0:56:54.879
<v Speaker 5>are connecting with people, situations, opportunities where you can coexist

0:56:55.120 --> 0:57:02.200
<v Speaker 5>and rely on each other and be interdependent and not codependent.

0:57:02.400 --> 0:57:05.440
<v Speaker 5>Although be careful of codependent energy with the devil as

0:57:05.480 --> 0:57:09.880
<v Speaker 5>your last card, with the four of Swords in reverse.

0:57:12.360 --> 0:57:13.120
<v Speaker 6>It's interesting.

0:57:13.160 --> 0:57:15.040
<v Speaker 5>I'm not sure why the four of Swords isn't in

0:57:15.120 --> 0:57:19.120
<v Speaker 5>reverse the four of Swords when it's upright. It has

0:57:19.160 --> 0:57:25.160
<v Speaker 5>to do with healing, therapy, rest, recuperation, rejuvenation in reverse.

0:57:25.440 --> 0:57:25.920
<v Speaker 6>It's this.

0:57:28.680 --> 0:57:36.280
<v Speaker 5>So it's this lack of mental peace or resistance to

0:57:38.200 --> 0:57:42.360
<v Speaker 5>mental health still mined with it being in reverse here.

0:57:44.480 --> 0:57:45.720
<v Speaker 6>It feels like.

0:57:52.280 --> 0:57:57.560
<v Speaker 5>It feels like there could be something challenging, especially when

0:57:57.560 --> 0:57:58.640
<v Speaker 5>it comes.

0:57:58.320 --> 0:58:02.640
<v Speaker 6>To it's like, even though.

0:58:06.400 --> 0:58:10.240
<v Speaker 5>Even though there's this energy of okay, I am getting

0:58:10.240 --> 0:58:14.560
<v Speaker 5>in tune with the passion, my own fire, my sacral chakra,

0:58:16.800 --> 0:58:20.080
<v Speaker 5>there still could be something that's like challenging about that

0:58:20.120 --> 0:58:23.520
<v Speaker 5>when it comes to mentally like it's not it's not

0:58:24.000 --> 0:58:25.040
<v Speaker 5>peaceful yet.

0:58:25.520 --> 0:58:26.600
<v Speaker 6>Does that make sense.

0:58:27.240 --> 0:58:29.520
<v Speaker 5>It doesn't mean it won't get there, but that too,

0:58:29.840 --> 0:58:33.720
<v Speaker 5>is a part of the leaning back, letting go energy.

0:58:35.720 --> 0:58:38.640
<v Speaker 6>I'm gonna pull a card to clarify that though, just

0:58:38.720 --> 0:58:39.720
<v Speaker 6>to make sure.

0:58:40.120 --> 0:58:42.880
<v Speaker 5>It does feel like you are making new investments here

0:58:43.080 --> 0:58:48.000
<v Speaker 5>with the page with the page of Pinnacles, so investing

0:58:48.040 --> 0:58:52.320
<v Speaker 5>in a new connection, a new collaborative connection, which is

0:58:52.480 --> 0:59:03.040
<v Speaker 5>great but clarify the four of Swords in reverse for Erica. Yeah,

0:59:03.480 --> 0:59:07.280
<v Speaker 5>oh sorry, clarify the four of Swords in reverse. You

0:59:07.400 --> 0:59:11.480
<v Speaker 5>got the Queen of Wands in reverse, the three of

0:59:11.560 --> 0:59:15.720
<v Speaker 5>Cups in reverse. Yeah, someone here is so this could

0:59:15.720 --> 0:59:19.439
<v Speaker 5>be you or someone around you, but someone here.

0:59:21.680 --> 0:59:25.520
<v Speaker 6>Is a little stressed out.

0:59:25.640 --> 0:59:33.200
<v Speaker 5>Uneasy around lack of initiative, lack of lack of movement

0:59:33.760 --> 0:59:35.280
<v Speaker 5>on your end, a.

0:59:35.320 --> 0:59:44.560
<v Speaker 4>Lack of uh yeah, a lack of or not, a lack.

0:59:44.400 --> 0:59:50.120
<v Speaker 5>Of healing, not not reuniting here. So the four of

0:59:50.160 --> 0:59:53.000
<v Speaker 5>Swords is in reverse. It's clarified by the Queen of

0:59:53.040 --> 0:59:57.919
<v Speaker 5>Wands in reverse. So this is divine, feminine energy that

0:59:58.520 --> 1:00:04.360
<v Speaker 5>isn't taking initiative, that's not putting up a fight, right.

1:00:05.880 --> 1:00:08.400
<v Speaker 5>The three of Cups in reverse, the three of cups

1:00:08.440 --> 1:00:13.720
<v Speaker 5>when it's upright, This is a very social, social, lighthearted,

1:00:13.760 --> 1:00:17.320
<v Speaker 5>playful energy. It's also the energy of reconciliation and reunion.

1:00:17.320 --> 1:00:20.120
<v Speaker 5>It's in reverse, so there is no reconnection with this person.

1:00:20.560 --> 1:00:24.680
<v Speaker 5>And then with the seven of Pinnacles, you know, there's

1:00:24.760 --> 1:00:27.240
<v Speaker 5>this energy of assessing the situation.

1:00:28.560 --> 1:00:29.720
<v Speaker 6>What have you been invested?

1:00:29.760 --> 1:00:32.240
<v Speaker 5>This feels like from the past, right, So what had

1:00:32.320 --> 1:00:36.400
<v Speaker 5>you invested your energy, effort, money, resources into maybe they

1:00:36.440 --> 1:00:38.760
<v Speaker 5>feel like they invested in you, you know what I mean.

1:00:38.880 --> 1:00:40.040
<v Speaker 6>And so now it's like.

1:00:41.720 --> 1:00:42.920
<v Speaker 1>How are you looking at it like that I could

1:00:42.960 --> 1:00:43.360
<v Speaker 1>look at you.

1:00:45.040 --> 1:00:45.440
<v Speaker 6>Yeah.

1:00:45.680 --> 1:00:49.640
<v Speaker 5>So now it's like, but it's over. What do you

1:00:49.680 --> 1:00:51.800
<v Speaker 5>mean it's over? It can't be over. With the death

1:00:51.840 --> 1:00:53.400
<v Speaker 5>card here at the bottom of the deck, that is

1:00:53.440 --> 1:00:56.280
<v Speaker 5>your energy. You're grounded in your energy, which means you

1:00:56.520 --> 1:00:59.800
<v Speaker 5>showing up as the queen of wants in reverse pertaining

1:00:59.800 --> 1:01:05.000
<v Speaker 5>to this connection, this situation, this burden you've already released.

1:01:09.600 --> 1:01:13.320
<v Speaker 5>I still feel like there's energetically still some shedding to do.

1:01:13.520 --> 1:01:21.520
<v Speaker 5>So it's not you're it's complete. Yes, you're no longer connected, yes,

1:01:24.520 --> 1:01:28.040
<v Speaker 5>but but but you absolutely have made the choice to

1:01:29.120 --> 1:01:32.760
<v Speaker 5>not not put up a fight, not act, not not engaged,

1:01:32.800 --> 1:01:37.600
<v Speaker 5>not reunite. And so yeah, it's causing some uneasiness.

1:01:37.760 --> 1:01:38.959
<v Speaker 1>He thinks he's gonna spin the block.

1:01:40.200 --> 1:01:44.080
<v Speaker 5>Yes, basically he thinks he's going to spin the block exactly.

1:01:44.680 --> 1:01:45.520
<v Speaker 6>Yeah, the devil.

1:01:45.760 --> 1:01:52.360
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, my tarot gifts just came in right now, thank

1:01:52.400 --> 1:01:52.800
<v Speaker 2>you Lord.

1:01:54.080 --> 1:01:57.160
<v Speaker 5>Yeah, but yeah, but but but it's not happening with

1:01:57.200 --> 1:01:59.320
<v Speaker 5>the three A F cups in reverse. And so now

1:02:00.160 --> 1:02:05.800
<v Speaker 5>that energy is stressing over it, right, maybe you are.

1:02:05.680 --> 1:02:09.240
<v Speaker 1>Too stressing over whether this person's gonna spend.

1:02:09.280 --> 1:02:11.040
<v Speaker 5>Not no, not whether or not this person is going

1:02:11.120 --> 1:02:22.600
<v Speaker 5>to spin the block, but as far as just knowing

1:02:22.600 --> 1:02:27.560
<v Speaker 5>that that presence, that energy is still there. Okay, So

1:02:27.680 --> 1:02:29.800
<v Speaker 5>again the Page of Pinnacles in reverse, the Three of

1:02:29.880 --> 1:02:31.600
<v Speaker 5>Pannicles and the Devil.

1:02:31.680 --> 1:02:32.880
<v Speaker 6>So, yeah, we're new.

1:02:32.920 --> 1:02:38.240
<v Speaker 5>We're focusing on planting new seeds, new opportunities, new collaborative partnerships,

1:02:38.680 --> 1:02:43.000
<v Speaker 5>entities like situations. Yeah, you're building something new with people

1:02:43.320 --> 1:02:47.680
<v Speaker 5>who want to collaborate build with you. The Devil card, though,

1:02:47.840 --> 1:02:52.600
<v Speaker 5>is your last card. That's an interesting ending. So yeah,

1:02:52.600 --> 1:02:55.560
<v Speaker 5>someone's obsessed with the devil and the four of Swords

1:02:55.560 --> 1:02:58.360
<v Speaker 5>in reverse. Someone is obsessed.

1:02:57.720 --> 1:02:59.640
<v Speaker 1>Why so obsessed with me?

1:03:01.640 --> 1:03:04.200
<v Speaker 5>But look, the death card and the two of Cops

1:03:04.280 --> 1:03:06.480
<v Speaker 5>is in reverse again. It is meant to say in reverse,

1:03:06.520 --> 1:03:09.040
<v Speaker 5>you are not meant to be with this person. Regardless

1:03:09.040 --> 1:03:12.080
<v Speaker 5>of whether or not there was some sort of soul

1:03:12.160 --> 1:03:15.400
<v Speaker 5>tie soule connection, it definitely feels more karmic than anything else,

1:03:15.640 --> 1:03:20.040
<v Speaker 5>which is the purpose of a karmic connection is the lesson, right,

1:03:20.280 --> 1:03:23.120
<v Speaker 5>it's not. It's not to hold on to forever. It's

1:03:23.120 --> 1:03:27.919
<v Speaker 5>to receive the lesson, let go and grow. So yeah,

1:03:27.960 --> 1:03:30.720
<v Speaker 5>with a devil card, someone's obsessed, They're they're going to

1:03:30.800 --> 1:03:33.880
<v Speaker 5>try to hold on to you. Whether they're taking action

1:03:33.960 --> 1:03:35.960
<v Speaker 5>towards you or not, it doesn't matter. They are pissed

1:03:35.960 --> 1:03:39.240
<v Speaker 5>that you are not taking action towards them.

1:03:39.360 --> 1:03:45.000
<v Speaker 1>That's just okay.

1:03:45.120 --> 1:03:45.560
<v Speaker 6>How is that?

1:03:47.200 --> 1:03:50.320
<v Speaker 1>Yeah? Interesting? I really resonate with that. I think that

1:03:50.440 --> 1:03:54.800
<v Speaker 1>I've been in a period of really trying to make

1:03:54.880 --> 1:03:59.640
<v Speaker 1>sure that I'm clearing space, like I'm really fully removed

1:03:59.680 --> 1:04:07.320
<v Speaker 1>from that energy completely, so that what's next for me

1:04:07.680 --> 1:04:10.920
<v Speaker 1>is really pure and not interrupted by any sort I'm

1:04:10.920 --> 1:04:14.240
<v Speaker 1>not bringing any of that into this. And I do

1:04:14.320 --> 1:04:18.200
<v Speaker 1>feel like I can feel the energy of my of

1:04:18.320 --> 1:04:21.120
<v Speaker 1>my last relationship is still present, and it's not me,

1:04:21.200 --> 1:04:23.360
<v Speaker 1>it's him. I can and we haven't spoke, we haven't

1:04:23.360 --> 1:04:25.040
<v Speaker 1>spoken to each other, we haven't reached out to one another.

1:04:25.320 --> 1:04:31.919
<v Speaker 1>But there is a level of obsession why I don't

1:04:31.960 --> 1:04:33.880
<v Speaker 1>want to, Like God, we might listen to this episode.

1:04:33.880 --> 1:04:36.280
<v Speaker 1>I don't think. I'm not saying he's because you're obsessed,

1:04:37.240 --> 1:04:41.720
<v Speaker 1>but but our relationship for you did, our relationship did

1:04:41.800 --> 1:04:45.080
<v Speaker 1>feel very karmic, and that's what I felt why I

1:04:45.120 --> 1:04:47.120
<v Speaker 1>went back for the lesson because we ended our relationship.

1:04:47.160 --> 1:04:49.600
<v Speaker 1>I went back because I felt like the lesson wasn'tcomplete.

1:04:49.640 --> 1:04:52.480
<v Speaker 1>And I've said, like, this relationship was so hard for

1:04:52.480 --> 1:04:54.200
<v Speaker 1>me to depart from and I didn't know why, Like

1:04:54.280 --> 1:04:57.720
<v Speaker 1>I've left people for less like I've I've had relationships

1:04:57.720 --> 1:04:59.200
<v Speaker 1>there was so much easier for me to walk away

1:04:59.200 --> 1:05:02.160
<v Speaker 1>from people that didn't hurt me as deeply as this

1:05:02.200 --> 1:05:04.960
<v Speaker 1>person hurt me. So why is this Why does it

1:05:05.000 --> 1:05:06.880
<v Speaker 1>feel so karmic? And that's what I said, It feels

1:05:06.920 --> 1:05:09.560
<v Speaker 1>like it's something karmic here that a lesson I was

1:05:09.680 --> 1:05:12.080
<v Speaker 1>meant to learn, and I knew that I had to

1:05:12.080 --> 1:05:14.200
<v Speaker 1>depart from it to get the blessing that was on

1:05:14.240 --> 1:05:16.880
<v Speaker 1>the other side for me, and and and even in

1:05:16.880 --> 1:05:19.560
<v Speaker 1>readings that's literally the thing that comes up over and

1:05:19.640 --> 1:05:22.440
<v Speaker 1>over and over again was that like this needs to

1:05:22.440 --> 1:05:24.200
<v Speaker 1>be released so you can get your blessing. This needs

1:05:24.200 --> 1:05:26.880
<v Speaker 1>to be releasing your blessing. This is dead, dead dead,

1:05:28.920 --> 1:05:31.720
<v Speaker 1>over and over and over, including my dear friend who.

1:05:31.560 --> 1:05:34.720
<v Speaker 2>Also psychic friend, who said it like five times in

1:05:34.800 --> 1:05:40.240
<v Speaker 2>different languages gently not so gently, subliminally.

1:05:40.640 --> 1:05:44.200
<v Speaker 6>And the death card telepathically, and the death card.

1:05:44.120 --> 1:05:46.160
<v Speaker 5>In this deck was the first card to come out

1:05:46.200 --> 1:05:49.080
<v Speaker 5>before I even started shuffling for you, and he heard

1:05:49.160 --> 1:05:49.640
<v Speaker 5>this again.

1:05:50.920 --> 1:05:56.200
<v Speaker 2>Yeah oh yeah, yeah yeah.

1:05:56.400 --> 1:06:02.080
<v Speaker 1>So yes, this feels affirming and it feels like, yeah,

1:06:02.120 --> 1:06:03.840
<v Speaker 1>thank you. I feel like I really needed to hear

1:06:03.880 --> 1:06:08.120
<v Speaker 1>this message. So I appreciate that You're welcome. You hear that, nigga.

1:06:08.240 --> 1:06:11.000
<v Speaker 1>So anybody, for any.

1:06:10.840 --> 1:06:14.440
<v Speaker 2>Of the women or men's out there listening wondering what

1:06:14.480 --> 1:06:17.400
<v Speaker 2>does this all mean? It means you're the shit and

1:06:17.440 --> 1:06:20.439
<v Speaker 2>your ex is probably obsessing over you because you've grown

1:06:20.480 --> 1:06:22.800
<v Speaker 2>and you've done the work and.

1:06:24.560 --> 1:06:25.400
<v Speaker 1>You're a bad bitch.

1:06:25.560 --> 1:06:28.200
<v Speaker 2>Keep on moving, don't look back, even if people are

1:06:28.240 --> 1:06:30.080
<v Speaker 2>secretly plotting on you.

1:06:30.160 --> 1:06:30.760
<v Speaker 6>Exactly.

1:06:32.720 --> 1:06:33.080
<v Speaker 1>Love this.

1:06:33.160 --> 1:06:36.320
<v Speaker 2>Well, Thank you, Ashley, Thank you Ashley. We tell everybody

1:06:36.360 --> 1:06:39.000
<v Speaker 2>where they can find you. Ashley is obviously in our

1:06:39.040 --> 1:06:42.040
<v Speaker 2>hood in La. She does parties, she pulls up, she

1:06:42.080 --> 1:06:43.880
<v Speaker 2>pulls up in different places in La. If you're as

1:06:43.920 --> 1:06:46.160
<v Speaker 2>lucky as us, you know to find her in Studio

1:06:46.200 --> 1:06:49.440
<v Speaker 2>City or Abic Kenny or any of the classy Pacific palisades.

1:06:49.640 --> 1:06:52.760
<v Speaker 2>Wherever she goes, tell her good Mom sent you. And

1:06:52.800 --> 1:06:56.040
<v Speaker 2>if you have a birthday party, a shindig, a corporate party,

1:06:56.040 --> 1:06:56.600
<v Speaker 2>coming up.

1:06:56.840 --> 1:06:58.760
<v Speaker 1>This is your girl. This is a beautiful bus.

1:06:58.880 --> 1:07:02.400
<v Speaker 2>Support black businesses and get your love reading here.

1:07:03.360 --> 1:07:04.280
<v Speaker 1>Yes, thank you?

1:07:05.560 --> 1:07:07.760
<v Speaker 5>Every ready where they can find you so you can

1:07:07.760 --> 1:07:11.520
<v Speaker 5>find me on Instagram, Star Magic Taro and my website

1:07:11.600 --> 1:07:13.280
<v Speaker 5>is Starmagic Tarot dot com.

1:07:13.400 --> 1:07:14.400
<v Speaker 1>And I'm in La.

1:07:14.520 --> 1:07:17.000
<v Speaker 5>I go all over the place Wednesday through Sunday from

1:07:17.080 --> 1:07:20.560
<v Speaker 5>nine am to five pm. I always post my locations

1:07:20.640 --> 1:07:22.680
<v Speaker 5>on Instagram.

1:07:22.680 --> 1:07:26.280
<v Speaker 1>Perfect, Thank you, thank you. I was so thorough. I'm

1:07:26.280 --> 1:07:27.480
<v Speaker 1>so yeah. I love this.

1:07:27.520 --> 1:07:31.280
<v Speaker 2>You gotta get media in the Magic school Bus. Star

1:07:31.400 --> 1:07:33.600
<v Speaker 2>Magic school Bus, thank you? Are you head ready to

1:07:33.640 --> 1:07:41.919
<v Speaker 2>head back up? I'm ready, let's go finish this episode. Okay, Wow,

1:07:42.080 --> 1:07:44.360
<v Speaker 2>that was amazing. I love Ashley.

1:07:44.440 --> 1:07:45.000
<v Speaker 1>I love her too.

1:07:45.120 --> 1:07:48.360
<v Speaker 2>That is very much a magical fucking bus from someone

1:07:48.400 --> 1:07:50.120
<v Speaker 2>who loved the Magic school Bus.

1:07:50.520 --> 1:07:52.920
<v Speaker 1>My woodchy dreams have come true me too. I'm so

1:07:52.960 --> 1:07:55.480
<v Speaker 1>happy that God just blessed us with her on that

1:07:55.520 --> 1:08:02.640
<v Speaker 1>one one one one one day. How did you enjoy

1:08:02.640 --> 1:08:05.080
<v Speaker 1>your reading? I did? I did.

1:08:05.200 --> 1:08:07.800
<v Speaker 2>I mean, it's interesting for someone to tell you to

1:08:07.840 --> 1:08:11.040
<v Speaker 2>prepare for protection, you know, but.

1:08:12.560 --> 1:08:14.840
<v Speaker 1>Most of the things I already knew in my gut.

1:08:15.440 --> 1:08:16.920
<v Speaker 1>I mean, I think she was just more so saying

1:08:16.920 --> 1:08:19.120
<v Speaker 1>like you need to just whatever boundaries you have, just

1:08:19.200 --> 1:08:22.960
<v Speaker 1>make sure that they're solid and legit, cause I think

1:08:23.000 --> 1:08:25.240
<v Speaker 1>like you've struggled with that in the past with him,

1:08:25.479 --> 1:08:27.599
<v Speaker 1>you know, and like feeling like you need to be

1:08:27.640 --> 1:08:31.320
<v Speaker 1>more flexible, be flexible or be understanding or also you're

1:08:31.360 --> 1:08:32.880
<v Speaker 1>good at you know, you've been really good at like

1:08:33.439 --> 1:08:35.760
<v Speaker 1>kind of just bee like it's fine, it's whatever, it's

1:08:35.760 --> 1:08:38.479
<v Speaker 1>not a big deal, and like not knowing how that

1:08:38.560 --> 1:08:41.799
<v Speaker 1>really has affected your your energy and your energetic body,

1:08:41.840 --> 1:08:43.880
<v Speaker 1>not even just your physical body, but just like you

1:08:44.000 --> 1:08:46.600
<v Speaker 1>kind of pushing things away and saying, oh, he disrespected

1:08:46.640 --> 1:08:48.040
<v Speaker 1>me and called me all these things, but I'm fine,

1:08:48.200 --> 1:08:50.639
<v Speaker 1>totally just being nice. I'm gonna call him. It's fine.

1:08:50.720 --> 1:08:52.280
<v Speaker 1>I need to do laundry. I'm gonna to his house

1:08:52.280 --> 1:08:54.360
<v Speaker 1>and wash laundry. No bitch, she called you a fucking

1:08:54.400 --> 1:08:57.719
<v Speaker 1>horror last week. You can't go wash laundry at his house.

1:08:58.040 --> 1:08:59.880
<v Speaker 1>So you've come a long way. I mean I have

1:09:00.160 --> 1:09:01.120
<v Speaker 1>come a long way. I have.

1:09:01.280 --> 1:09:02.960
<v Speaker 2>Even when she was mentioning, I'm like, who could the

1:09:02.960 --> 1:09:04.640
<v Speaker 2>fuck she could be talking about? And maybe there's only

1:09:04.680 --> 1:09:10.080
<v Speaker 2>really one person that has any any strings attached. But yeah,

1:09:10.160 --> 1:09:13.439
<v Speaker 2>I think you're right. It is a matter of keeping

1:09:13.479 --> 1:09:17.559
<v Speaker 2>strong boundaries and minimal communication, because that's what it is.

1:09:17.600 --> 1:09:20.600
<v Speaker 2>And I think it's also really just like releasing not

1:09:20.720 --> 1:09:23.559
<v Speaker 2>the care because obviously we have a common thing that

1:09:23.640 --> 1:09:26.720
<v Speaker 2>I care about, but just releasing that I have no

1:09:26.800 --> 1:09:29.320
<v Speaker 2>control over this person and how they show up for

1:09:29.640 --> 1:09:30.200
<v Speaker 2>my person.

1:09:30.640 --> 1:09:33.000
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, but also having the boundaries for her too, because

1:09:33.000 --> 1:09:35.280
<v Speaker 1>she might she doesn't necessarily have those tools yet, you know,

1:09:35.360 --> 1:09:37.880
<v Speaker 1>like she's only nine and she's just under she's just

1:09:38.000 --> 1:09:39.960
<v Speaker 1>I mean, that's her dad, So creating boundaries around your

1:09:40.040 --> 1:09:43.519
<v Speaker 1>dad at nine is absolutely impossible. So you have to

1:09:43.560 --> 1:09:45.639
<v Speaker 1>do that for her. You have to create the boundary

1:09:45.680 --> 1:09:48.760
<v Speaker 1>for her if that's necessary. And maybe that's also the

1:09:48.800 --> 1:09:54.599
<v Speaker 1>message too, around just like really protecting her from whatever

1:09:54.800 --> 1:09:56.800
<v Speaker 1>she needs protection from, yeah, and.

1:09:56.840 --> 1:10:01.160
<v Speaker 2>Just yea having conversations and keeping it up. But and

1:10:01.200 --> 1:10:05.960
<v Speaker 2>also just not caring because you haven't really shown me

1:10:07.000 --> 1:10:10.320
<v Speaker 2>care and like, so I can't really care. I'm out

1:10:10.320 --> 1:10:13.960
<v Speaker 2>in the space for that. How did you feel about yours?

1:10:14.479 --> 1:10:16.639
<v Speaker 2>Which you guys is only going to be on Patreon.

1:10:16.720 --> 1:10:19.439
<v Speaker 2>We only have enough time for one reading on this episode,

1:10:19.479 --> 1:10:23.360
<v Speaker 2>and Eric is being very scorpio mysterious private about her

1:10:23.439 --> 1:10:24.920
<v Speaker 2>love life right now, So.

1:10:25.439 --> 1:10:28.120
<v Speaker 1>I and this reading was very telling about my love life.

1:10:28.160 --> 1:10:32.240
<v Speaker 1>It was very direct, and I felt like, what.

1:10:32.520 --> 1:10:34.759
<v Speaker 2>Do you think that she Well, yes, it was very direct.

1:10:36.040 --> 1:10:38.840
<v Speaker 2>It's been yeah, But do you think she was telling

1:10:38.880 --> 1:10:41.920
<v Speaker 2>you to watch your like not watch your back, but

1:10:42.120 --> 1:10:44.800
<v Speaker 2>like your front and your back kind of.

1:10:44.880 --> 1:10:46.479
<v Speaker 1>I think this is a trend that I've had that

1:10:46.520 --> 1:10:48.519
<v Speaker 1>I've a message that I have been receiving a lot.

1:10:48.800 --> 1:10:53.479
<v Speaker 1>Do you think you're just something crazy? No, no, ego

1:10:53.640 --> 1:10:55.960
<v Speaker 1>better fucking not be you ass you won't do that.

1:10:56.080 --> 1:11:05.040
<v Speaker 1>But it was just I think you don't know no, no.

1:11:03.920 --> 1:11:07.439
<v Speaker 2>No, not that I think like harmful, violent, But I

1:11:07.479 --> 1:11:09.400
<v Speaker 2>don't think. I don't think the ego is as strong

1:11:09.439 --> 1:11:09.960
<v Speaker 2>as you think.

1:11:10.160 --> 1:11:11.360
<v Speaker 1>I don't think that it is.

1:11:11.920 --> 1:11:14.160
<v Speaker 2>Oh okay, I think that like I think like the

1:11:14.200 --> 1:11:16.920
<v Speaker 2>craziness of like the obsession of wanting someone. I this

1:11:16.960 --> 1:11:19.320
<v Speaker 2>is from my own This is from my own experience.

1:11:19.680 --> 1:11:21.960
<v Speaker 2>When you're obsessed, your ego goes out the window. You're like,

1:11:22.000 --> 1:11:24.120
<v Speaker 2>fuck it, I'm gonna do it. I'ma do the crazy thing.

1:11:24.760 --> 1:11:25.519
<v Speaker 2>I'm gonna show up.

1:11:25.640 --> 1:11:28.360
<v Speaker 1>But when time goes by, I would think that that

1:11:28.360 --> 1:11:32.400
<v Speaker 1>that that feeling numbs more like the call to do

1:11:32.439 --> 1:11:34.479
<v Speaker 1>that maybe numbs more, but I don't know.

1:11:34.439 --> 1:11:36.439
<v Speaker 2>It also might up it more because you're like, I'm

1:11:36.479 --> 1:11:38.200
<v Speaker 2>expecting you to pick up, I'm expecting you to call,

1:11:38.200 --> 1:11:40.479
<v Speaker 2>I'm expecting you to come around. And then the longer

1:11:40.479 --> 1:11:43.080
<v Speaker 2>it goes, like the obsession might get crazier.

1:11:43.160 --> 1:11:44.759
<v Speaker 1>I don't know, but the reading was kind of crazy.

1:11:45.040 --> 1:11:50.880
<v Speaker 1>Just listen to Ashley do my reading. It's something that yeah,

1:11:50.960 --> 1:11:52.720
<v Speaker 1>I don't know, it's it's something that's been coming up

1:11:52.840 --> 1:11:54.600
<v Speaker 1>a few different times from a few different people that

1:11:54.640 --> 1:11:57.880
<v Speaker 1>have read me, and I don't want to ignore it,

1:11:58.880 --> 1:11:59.920
<v Speaker 1>but I also don't want to put a lot of

1:12:00.120 --> 1:12:04.679
<v Speaker 1>energy towards it because I am very protected in my life.

1:12:04.760 --> 1:12:07.200
<v Speaker 1>I've just genuinely been very protected when it comes to

1:12:07.240 --> 1:12:09.759
<v Speaker 1>like matters of that of that degree, even if matters

1:12:09.760 --> 1:12:12.599
<v Speaker 1>of the heart, like things being revealed to me and

1:12:12.640 --> 1:12:16.080
<v Speaker 1>like the at in divine timing at crucial moments in

1:12:16.080 --> 1:12:17.879
<v Speaker 1>my life where I'm about to make a big decision

1:12:18.439 --> 1:12:23.080
<v Speaker 1>moving getting married, like all these things, like I'm always

1:12:23.080 --> 1:12:25.880
<v Speaker 1>protected when I'm about to make very big choices you're

1:12:25.880 --> 1:12:28.960
<v Speaker 1>not supposed to, even like with Iri, like having Iri,

1:12:29.160 --> 1:12:32.160
<v Speaker 1>like God said, no, I want this soul to come through,

1:12:32.320 --> 1:12:34.840
<v Speaker 1>even knowing that like I was going to be hurt

1:12:34.840 --> 1:12:39.400
<v Speaker 1>through the process, you know, so I think that I

1:12:39.400 --> 1:12:42.040
<v Speaker 1>think either way, I'm fine, and I wish that person

1:12:42.920 --> 1:12:46.040
<v Speaker 1>love in space and all the things. But yeah, the

1:12:46.080 --> 1:12:50.120
<v Speaker 1>reading was intense, but also as a reminder of like

1:12:50.200 --> 1:12:51.960
<v Speaker 1>the path that I'm on, which is like is the

1:12:52.000 --> 1:12:55.040
<v Speaker 1>self love is the protect is like the cleansing of

1:12:55.040 --> 1:13:01.679
<v Speaker 1>my of like the energies from before from my body

1:13:01.720 --> 1:13:04.599
<v Speaker 1>and my soul. And that's really like the vibe I've

1:13:04.600 --> 1:13:06.360
<v Speaker 1>been on. And that's actually why I got this deck

1:13:06.400 --> 1:13:09.120
<v Speaker 1>for us. By the way, Self Love Deck.

1:13:09.439 --> 1:13:13.160
<v Speaker 2>Oh from are we really strangers? We're not not really strangers.

1:13:13.439 --> 1:13:15.599
<v Speaker 1>I don't know if you guys have heard of this brand,

1:13:15.640 --> 1:13:19.000
<v Speaker 1>but I really love it and the self Love Deck

1:13:19.160 --> 1:13:23.479
<v Speaker 1>has been interesting. It's like prompting me to really have

1:13:23.560 --> 1:13:29.680
<v Speaker 1>to like deeply reflect on my wants, my needs, my desires,

1:13:30.400 --> 1:13:33.519
<v Speaker 1>my x and I wanted to pull a few cards

1:13:33.520 --> 1:13:37.000
<v Speaker 1>with you today if that's okay, my dear, Okay, danky,

1:13:37.800 --> 1:13:41.320
<v Speaker 1>But first I want will a joint because it's time. Yeah,

1:13:41.800 --> 1:13:47.000
<v Speaker 1>you guys, we've been in the studio for ten hours.

1:13:47.960 --> 1:13:49.760
<v Speaker 1>My poor child has been in the other room for

1:13:49.840 --> 1:13:52.439
<v Speaker 1>ten hours. Just I don't even know what she's been entertained.

1:13:52.439 --> 1:13:55.719
<v Speaker 1>I think now her bestie is here, so it's better.

1:13:55.800 --> 1:13:58.599
<v Speaker 1>But it's been a long day for working moms.

1:13:59.040 --> 1:14:01.799
<v Speaker 2>I'm so grateful that kids have each other. I mean, honestly,

1:14:01.800 --> 1:14:03.640
<v Speaker 2>I'm grateful our kids have each other. I'm grateful we

1:14:03.680 --> 1:14:06.479
<v Speaker 2>have each other. I'm grateful that we have Orlando now,

1:14:07.040 --> 1:14:10.160
<v Speaker 2>Like it's literally each piece is an intricate part of

1:14:10.240 --> 1:14:12.599
<v Speaker 2>everything that happens in our world.

1:14:12.800 --> 1:14:13.280
<v Speaker 1>And like.

1:14:15.000 --> 1:14:18.240
<v Speaker 2>I know you're talking before about our like your parents,

1:14:18.280 --> 1:14:21.800
<v Speaker 2>your mom, like our famili's being ready for certain like, hey,

1:14:21.840 --> 1:14:24.360
<v Speaker 2>what's up? You know, I think women's like women parents

1:14:24.400 --> 1:14:26.760
<v Speaker 2>do that, but I forget like now that as a mom,

1:14:27.160 --> 1:14:29.840
<v Speaker 2>I mean, what's up? Like am I going to meet someone?

1:14:29.840 --> 1:14:30.880
<v Speaker 2>Am I going to meet their parents?

1:14:30.920 --> 1:14:31.000
<v Speaker 5>Oh?

1:14:31.360 --> 1:14:34.200
<v Speaker 2>You know, like wanting you to wanting to basically like

1:14:34.320 --> 1:14:37.679
<v Speaker 2>leave you and save hands. Yeah, not that anyone's going anywhere,

1:14:37.720 --> 1:14:39.240
<v Speaker 2>but I just when you said that, I just didn't

1:14:39.240 --> 1:14:41.280
<v Speaker 2>think about it. But it's like there have been times

1:14:41.280 --> 1:14:45.160
<v Speaker 2>in relationships where I felt good and then suddenly I

1:14:45.160 --> 1:14:48.240
<v Speaker 2>felt unsafe, you know, like that drop like someone's done

1:14:48.240 --> 1:14:50.439
<v Speaker 2>something crazy to me, and then suddenly I feel alone

1:14:50.439 --> 1:14:53.360
<v Speaker 2>in the world, you know, and that's a very scary feeling,

1:14:53.400 --> 1:14:55.360
<v Speaker 2>like oh I feel safe or good, and then you'd

1:14:55.600 --> 1:14:57.519
<v Speaker 2>slap me or some shit, and then I'm like, oh no,

1:14:57.560 --> 1:14:59.320
<v Speaker 2>like I gotta call my dad, and I'm like, bitch,

1:14:59.320 --> 1:15:02.840
<v Speaker 2>you're not twelve, you know. And then it's like even then,

1:15:02.880 --> 1:15:04.360
<v Speaker 2>it's like you can't call your dad because then like

1:15:04.400 --> 1:15:06.360
<v Speaker 2>at this point we're all adults, and like that's maybe

1:15:06.400 --> 1:15:07.960
<v Speaker 2>asking for your dad to go to jail.

1:15:08.840 --> 1:15:09.080
<v Speaker 6>You know.

1:15:09.120 --> 1:15:11.360
<v Speaker 1>There's like all these there's there's all these things that

1:15:11.400 --> 1:15:13.559
<v Speaker 1>we like, I don't know, there's that, there's so much

1:15:13.560 --> 1:15:16.519
<v Speaker 1>to that. It's like, don't call your dad because yeah,

1:15:16.520 --> 1:15:18.760
<v Speaker 1>there's that. There's also like maybe I'll go back together

1:15:18.800 --> 1:15:19.920
<v Speaker 1>with him, and then it's going to be a bigger

1:15:19.920 --> 1:15:21.400
<v Speaker 1>deal than it needs to be, and I don't want

1:15:21.439 --> 1:15:23.960
<v Speaker 1>to expose him. I need to protect my family. It's

1:15:24.000 --> 1:15:26.920
<v Speaker 1>like all these things, all these layers that a woman

1:15:26.960 --> 1:15:28.920
<v Speaker 1>goes through and thinks about or maybe you don't have

1:15:28.960 --> 1:15:31.840
<v Speaker 1>a dad, you know, maybe you don't have a dad.

1:15:31.920 --> 1:15:33.519
<v Speaker 2>Maybe you don't have a dad that's going to show

1:15:33.600 --> 1:15:36.160
<v Speaker 2>up that way, or brothers or whatever. But like I

1:15:36.200 --> 1:15:39.240
<v Speaker 2>do I really I've felt I've felt that feeling of

1:15:39.240 --> 1:15:41.280
<v Speaker 2>being a vult, like being vulnerable as a woman in

1:15:41.320 --> 1:15:44.400
<v Speaker 2>the world, especially having a child, and feeling like I

1:15:44.479 --> 1:15:49.320
<v Speaker 2>feel much more powerful in partnership with you, with Orlando,

1:15:49.520 --> 1:15:51.960
<v Speaker 2>Like I feel like I have my people and people

1:15:52.000 --> 1:15:53.960
<v Speaker 2>have my back, and there's people who are not going

1:15:54.040 --> 1:15:55.720
<v Speaker 2>to do things that are blatantly going to have me

1:15:55.800 --> 1:15:57.400
<v Speaker 2>out here, you know what I mean.

1:15:57.439 --> 1:15:59.120
<v Speaker 1>And so as a mom, I can.

1:15:59.080 --> 1:16:02.960
<v Speaker 2>Understand how that how I would want that from my child,

1:16:02.960 --> 1:16:04.519
<v Speaker 2>Not that I'm going to be the mom like you know,

1:16:04.720 --> 1:16:08.400
<v Speaker 2>or we're gonna get some grandkids, but like just feeling like, oh,

1:16:08.520 --> 1:16:10.599
<v Speaker 2>I don't have to worry about you and this person,

1:16:11.240 --> 1:16:12.400
<v Speaker 2>you know, I don't have to worry about this person

1:16:12.479 --> 1:16:15.120
<v Speaker 2>doing some crazy shit to you, you know. And maybe

1:16:15.120 --> 1:16:17.280
<v Speaker 2>because I've been in relationships where niggas have done crazy

1:16:17.280 --> 1:16:18.720
<v Speaker 2>shit to me, like put their hands on me and

1:16:18.760 --> 1:16:19.320
<v Speaker 2>shit like that.

1:16:19.720 --> 1:16:20.839
<v Speaker 1>But I think that.

1:16:22.439 --> 1:16:25.519
<v Speaker 2>Women generally are supposed to be wild and free and

1:16:25.560 --> 1:16:30.360
<v Speaker 2>manifest and like utilize their intuitiveness and their magic. But

1:16:30.680 --> 1:16:33.519
<v Speaker 2>we've been so we've so rarely been protected and felt

1:16:33.560 --> 1:16:38.000
<v Speaker 2>safe enough to do that that we have not been

1:16:38.040 --> 1:16:39.840
<v Speaker 2>able to tap into that because we haven't been with

1:16:39.880 --> 1:16:43.200
<v Speaker 2>safe relationships, and so I think safety brings like a

1:16:43.200 --> 1:16:47.240
<v Speaker 2>whole different level to your ability to manifest.

1:16:48.000 --> 1:16:49.760
<v Speaker 1>It does because the man are supposed to protect us

1:16:49.800 --> 1:16:50.439
<v Speaker 1>so that we can.

1:16:50.479 --> 1:16:53.240
<v Speaker 2>Stay so we can stay wild and be magical.

1:16:53.479 --> 1:16:55.280
<v Speaker 1>Wait, you guys, I want to show you these joint

1:16:55.280 --> 1:16:58.600
<v Speaker 1>papers because this is like very exciting breaking news. Me

1:16:58.680 --> 1:17:01.800
<v Speaker 1>and Mila have our own joint papers.

1:17:01.479 --> 1:17:07.880
<v Speaker 2>And we also have matches and guess what, they're pink.

1:17:08.720 --> 1:17:12.439
<v Speaker 1>Our papers are also pink to match our matches. And

1:17:12.720 --> 1:17:17.200
<v Speaker 1>because we're some coordinating beaches. Have you have you realijoint? Oh?

1:17:17.240 --> 1:17:20.519
<v Speaker 2>We did RELI joint with them already. Yes, we know

1:17:20.520 --> 1:17:23.760
<v Speaker 2>it because it says manifest with us. I'm gonna light

1:17:23.840 --> 1:17:26.120
<v Speaker 2>it and I'm gonna let's take a moment to manifest

1:17:26.120 --> 1:17:29.600
<v Speaker 2>some things and love and in partnership.

1:17:29.920 --> 1:17:38.080
<v Speaker 1>Let's put some energy into this. Okay, hmm, I was

1:17:38.080 --> 1:17:42.400
<v Speaker 1>really envisioned you me at your wedding. Well, there you go.

1:17:43.120 --> 1:17:44.160
<v Speaker 1>Taste like marriage?

1:17:44.280 --> 1:17:48.280
<v Speaker 2>Taste like marriage? How do you think marriage tastes.

1:17:51.360 --> 1:17:56.519
<v Speaker 1>Melted caramel? I like caramel, salty, extra sweet. Yeah, I

1:17:56.520 --> 1:18:03.280
<v Speaker 1>can see that. Okay, are you ready to play the

1:18:03.360 --> 1:18:07.640
<v Speaker 1>self love game? I'm ready. Okay, let's start. Should we

1:18:07.640 --> 1:18:14.439
<v Speaker 1>start with past. Let's see, is it past, past, present, future? Oh?

1:18:14.479 --> 1:18:16.639
<v Speaker 1>I didn't realize that that was just one, two, three levels.

1:18:17.640 --> 1:18:20.680
<v Speaker 1>Maybe I'll do a little shuffle, little tarot shuffle since

1:18:20.680 --> 1:18:25.040
<v Speaker 1>we already got our tarots out of the way. Oh god,

1:18:25.040 --> 1:18:30.479
<v Speaker 1>it's gonna be on. Okay, can you pick one? Uh

1:18:30.560 --> 1:18:37.439
<v Speaker 1>huh mm hmm past?

1:18:39.520 --> 1:18:41.960
<v Speaker 2>What did you feel bad for at the time, but

1:18:42.000 --> 1:18:42.880
<v Speaker 2>are glad you did?

1:18:42.920 --> 1:18:49.960
<v Speaker 1>Anyway? A lot of shit? Are you asking? Is that

1:18:50.200 --> 1:18:52.680
<v Speaker 1>is he asking me? We're supposed to ask yourselves. We're

1:18:52.720 --> 1:18:55.080
<v Speaker 1>asking ourselves. What is it? You know?

1:18:55.320 --> 1:18:55.479
<v Speaker 3>Think?

1:18:55.600 --> 1:18:57.640
<v Speaker 2>What did you feel bad for at the time, but

1:18:57.680 --> 1:19:03.680
<v Speaker 2>you're glad you did anyway? I'm glad I cheated on

1:19:03.760 --> 1:19:09.599
<v Speaker 2>Adventure bay. Oh I needed to go and he needed

1:19:09.640 --> 1:19:10.960
<v Speaker 2>to make me go fast.

1:19:11.800 --> 1:19:16.200
<v Speaker 1>That was good? Am I a slpos to answer this

1:19:16.240 --> 1:19:18.040
<v Speaker 1>as well? I think? So what did I feel bad

1:19:18.080 --> 1:19:24.760
<v Speaker 1>for in the past that I did? Anyway? Drop out

1:19:24.760 --> 1:19:28.559
<v Speaker 1>of college? Yeah, I felt really guilty about that, but

1:19:28.600 --> 1:19:31.320
<v Speaker 1>then it ended up working out got pretty good. I

1:19:31.320 --> 1:19:37.599
<v Speaker 1>got a job traveling the world soon after that. Yeah,

1:19:37.800 --> 1:19:39.080
<v Speaker 1>set me on this journey here.

1:19:40.040 --> 1:19:41.760
<v Speaker 2>It isn't crazy to think the kids that we were

1:19:42.120 --> 1:19:49.639
<v Speaker 2>hesitant to have. Literally, there's a word I'm trying to set.

1:19:49.680 --> 1:19:53.720
<v Speaker 1>Held propelled us into this well the other day, what

1:19:53.840 --> 1:19:55.360
<v Speaker 1>was it yesterday? It was like, wow, we have a

1:19:55.360 --> 1:19:57.760
<v Speaker 1>whole have a mom? How the fuck do I have

1:19:57.840 --> 1:20:01.600
<v Speaker 1>a mom brand? Essentially? And I didn't even want kids?

1:20:02.120 --> 1:20:05.960
<v Speaker 1>Like that's a fucking what do they call it? A change?

1:20:05.960 --> 1:20:08.880
<v Speaker 1>When it's like in a movie, when it's like a

1:20:08.880 --> 1:20:12.200
<v Speaker 1>plot twist. Yeah, that's a plot twist because that was

1:20:12.320 --> 1:20:16.200
<v Speaker 1>not on my mind when I was in my twenties

1:20:16.360 --> 1:20:18.519
<v Speaker 1>at all. I just wanted to have fun and be

1:20:18.560 --> 1:20:20.600
<v Speaker 1>a famous actress.

1:20:20.800 --> 1:20:22.240
<v Speaker 2>I wanted to be a mom, but I don't think

1:20:22.240 --> 1:20:24.320
<v Speaker 2>I really thought it out. I didn't want to be

1:20:24.320 --> 1:20:26.040
<v Speaker 2>a mom in the situation that I was in. But

1:20:26.200 --> 1:20:30.200
<v Speaker 2>you know, a tarot reading, we'll do it? Am I

1:20:30.240 --> 1:20:39.160
<v Speaker 2>pulling from the top titty reminder. I don't know if

1:20:39.160 --> 1:20:39.759
<v Speaker 2>this is a question.

1:20:39.960 --> 1:20:40.960
<v Speaker 1>I think it's just a reminder.

1:20:40.960 --> 1:20:43.840
<v Speaker 2>Then it may be hard to see now, but you

1:20:43.880 --> 1:20:45.880
<v Speaker 2>did the best you could at the time.

1:20:46.240 --> 1:20:55.519
<v Speaker 1>Mm hmm. Yeah. I was trying to think of a

1:20:55.560 --> 1:21:01.400
<v Speaker 1>moment that I can feel that way about. Still processing,

1:21:01.400 --> 1:21:04.080
<v Speaker 1>I'm probably still not. I probably still don't feel that

1:21:04.080 --> 1:21:06.519
<v Speaker 1>way yet. I guess should I pick one? Are are you

1:21:06.520 --> 1:21:07.000
<v Speaker 1>a shuffle.

1:21:08.880 --> 1:21:12.519
<v Speaker 2>Oh look at this fancy we're using now that we're

1:21:12.600 --> 1:21:14.520
<v Speaker 2>dressing old timey permanently.

1:21:14.880 --> 1:21:16.240
<v Speaker 1>We also I need to make.

1:21:16.120 --> 1:21:16.599
<v Speaker 3>It look old.

1:21:18.000 --> 1:21:20.120
<v Speaker 1>I need to make it look old time.

1:21:24.960 --> 1:21:28.000
<v Speaker 2>I think I need to trademark the word old timey.

1:21:28.200 --> 1:21:29.000
<v Speaker 2>It's an adjective.

1:21:34.760 --> 1:21:40.800
<v Speaker 1>Bitch. All right, I got lost. I'm really committing to

1:21:40.840 --> 1:21:44.880
<v Speaker 1>this life. Okay. I used to say in the olden

1:21:44.960 --> 1:21:47.880
<v Speaker 1>days when I was talking to my grandfather that Papa

1:21:48.000 --> 1:21:55.680
<v Speaker 1>was like in the olden days, Okay, what forced you

1:21:55.760 --> 1:22:03.480
<v Speaker 1>to grow even if it was hard? Motherhood? Yeah, motherhood rejection.

1:22:05.680 --> 1:22:13.280
<v Speaker 1>Uh yeah, those two things. Mother I would say, avoidance,

1:22:13.360 --> 1:22:18.600
<v Speaker 1>avoiding shit. I go to level two. Level two is

1:22:19.000 --> 1:22:35.000
<v Speaker 1>present the present. They're not terarot cards.

1:22:35.000 --> 1:22:52.600
<v Speaker 2>Okay, what do you have great taste in everything? I

1:22:52.960 --> 1:22:56.160
<v Speaker 2>like my fashion sense. I like how I dress and

1:22:56.200 --> 1:23:02.320
<v Speaker 2>how I decorate. I agree, what do you have a

1:23:02.360 --> 1:23:05.160
<v Speaker 2>great What do you think you have great taste in?

1:23:06.280 --> 1:23:07.560
<v Speaker 2>And how I make businesses?

1:23:10.160 --> 1:23:17.479
<v Speaker 1>I think I have great taste in fashions. I think

1:23:17.520 --> 1:23:23.439
<v Speaker 1>I have great taste in just aesthetically like what I

1:23:23.640 --> 1:23:26.760
<v Speaker 1>envision the energy and the vibeing like I can. I'm

1:23:26.840 --> 1:23:31.400
<v Speaker 1>a vibe a curator. I would say, and I think

1:23:31.439 --> 1:23:36.439
<v Speaker 1>I have good taste in go friends. I was gonna

1:23:36.439 --> 1:23:38.840
<v Speaker 1>say that friends, Yeah, a good taste in friends. I

1:23:38.840 --> 1:23:42.600
<v Speaker 1>have a really well curated friend group. It took me

1:23:43.080 --> 1:23:46.200
<v Speaker 1>thirty six years to find all of them, and it's

1:23:46.280 --> 1:23:49.080
<v Speaker 1>ever evolving. But for the most part, I have a

1:23:49.240 --> 1:23:52.519
<v Speaker 1>very strong foundation. I don't really see it. I really

1:23:52.520 --> 1:23:58.200
<v Speaker 1>don't see the foundation shifting anytime soon. What are you

1:23:58.240 --> 1:24:00.360
<v Speaker 1>spending more energy on than you have to give?

1:24:04.360 --> 1:24:09.920
<v Speaker 2>Stress, stressing, negative thoughts, spending more energy on negative thoughts

1:24:10.000 --> 1:24:13.120
<v Speaker 2>and stress than I have to give because I don't

1:24:13.160 --> 1:24:15.960
<v Speaker 2>have any time to give to anything negative. But sometimes

1:24:16.000 --> 1:24:25.559
<v Speaker 2>I find myself having fleeting but still self self doubt,

1:24:25.600 --> 1:24:27.400
<v Speaker 2>self doubt, negative self talk.

1:24:27.920 --> 1:24:30.120
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I was gonna say negative self talk. I would say,

1:24:30.479 --> 1:24:36.040
<v Speaker 1>talking badly about myself, about my body to myself. And

1:24:36.080 --> 1:24:41.080
<v Speaker 1>then also I think because I'm I think I'm a realist,

1:24:41.080 --> 1:24:43.000
<v Speaker 1>and I think because I am such a deep reflector

1:24:43.080 --> 1:24:46.880
<v Speaker 1>of like all scenarios, sometimes I can focus on the

1:24:46.880 --> 1:24:51.160
<v Speaker 1>worst case scenario, even though I've also acknowledged the like

1:24:51.320 --> 1:24:54.160
<v Speaker 1>the best case scenario, and I know that either one

1:24:54.240 --> 1:24:57.559
<v Speaker 1>is possibility. But the worst case scenario also, I think

1:24:57.600 --> 1:24:59.880
<v Speaker 1>often I think it probably just rattles me more so

1:25:00.040 --> 1:25:01.800
<v Speaker 1>it sticks with me, and so it's always kind of

1:25:01.880 --> 1:25:06.400
<v Speaker 1>lingering in the background, even when I'm moving towards the

1:25:06.439 --> 1:25:07.919
<v Speaker 1>path of the best case scenario.

1:25:08.800 --> 1:25:12.599
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, yes, yeah, I will probably think about the worst

1:25:12.640 --> 1:25:17.400
<v Speaker 2>case scenario first, and much more than the best case.

1:25:17.560 --> 1:25:20.480
<v Speaker 1>I think I think of the first, the best case first,

1:25:20.680 --> 1:25:22.840
<v Speaker 1>and then the worst comes in and creeps in with

1:25:22.920 --> 1:25:28.840
<v Speaker 1>heavy motherfucking a vengeance. It's like, hey, bitch, don't forget

1:25:28.880 --> 1:25:31.280
<v Speaker 1>about this nig go over here, because we can fuck

1:25:31.320 --> 1:25:31.760
<v Speaker 1>all this shit.

1:25:31.840 --> 1:25:31.960
<v Speaker 6>Ut.

1:25:32.960 --> 1:25:37.000
<v Speaker 2>I challenge everyone to check themselves when they have when

1:25:37.040 --> 1:25:40.719
<v Speaker 2>they visualize or think of the most negative outcome first.

1:25:41.520 --> 1:25:45.240
<v Speaker 2>I really challenge you to just in every situation think

1:25:45.240 --> 1:25:48.920
<v Speaker 2>about the best outcome first, and the most and astudents

1:25:48.960 --> 1:25:51.439
<v Speaker 2>something else creeps in. Let it go like the very best,

1:25:51.520 --> 1:25:53.680
<v Speaker 2>like even more than your mind desires. M.

1:25:55.000 --> 1:25:57.080
<v Speaker 1>That's a great practice.

1:25:57.280 --> 1:25:59.439
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I really invite you to do that, like, and

1:25:59.479 --> 1:26:02.120
<v Speaker 2>don't limit yourself either, like, oh, that can't happen.

1:26:02.160 --> 1:26:02.559
<v Speaker 1>No, Like.

1:26:04.040 --> 1:26:05.920
<v Speaker 2>After I found out the five richest niggas in the

1:26:05.960 --> 1:26:09.679
<v Speaker 2>world double their fucking wealth in fucking four years, I'm like, bitch,

1:26:09.720 --> 1:26:10.519
<v Speaker 2>I can ask for anything.

1:26:10.640 --> 1:26:14.160
<v Speaker 1>It's basically like, let's up the delusion and let's up

1:26:14.200 --> 1:26:18.680
<v Speaker 1>the delusion, like let's just be actually crazy. And you

1:26:18.720 --> 1:26:21.160
<v Speaker 1>know what those positive delusion and those are the ones,

1:26:21.200 --> 1:26:23.360
<v Speaker 1>those are the people that are often most successful. I

1:26:23.360 --> 1:26:27.640
<v Speaker 1>mean yeah, they have insane delusion around things and it

1:26:27.760 --> 1:26:32.479
<v Speaker 1>just works. So yeah, your turn is it? I think?

1:26:32.520 --> 1:26:33.680
<v Speaker 1>So I just read this one.

1:26:39.600 --> 1:26:43.600
<v Speaker 2>What's an outfit you feel great in my naked body?

1:26:46.080 --> 1:26:52.200
<v Speaker 1>This outfit's pretty cute. Mmm, like a silky like a

1:26:52.320 --> 1:26:56.439
<v Speaker 1>silky low cut dress like that shows my titty so

1:26:56.479 --> 1:26:57.920
<v Speaker 1>I don't have to wear a bra like you can

1:26:57.960 --> 1:27:00.599
<v Speaker 1>see them hang. And then also is cut very low

1:27:00.640 --> 1:27:04.599
<v Speaker 1>in the back and it's form fitting but just enough

1:27:04.720 --> 1:27:09.679
<v Speaker 1>movement that it just like lightly just envelopes my body.

1:27:10.479 --> 1:27:14.280
<v Speaker 1>And some sexy heels.

1:27:14.920 --> 1:27:17.960
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, give me a six inchill, give me a high

1:27:18.040 --> 1:27:20.439
<v Speaker 2>slit and yes, I love a low lo low almost

1:27:20.479 --> 1:27:23.960
<v Speaker 2>to my ass crack back. Yeah, and a low and

1:27:23.960 --> 1:27:25.559
<v Speaker 2>a low plunge for my little titties.

1:27:25.920 --> 1:27:27.040
<v Speaker 1>I also love lingerie.

1:27:27.479 --> 1:27:29.479
<v Speaker 2>I like see through lace, like lace that I can

1:27:29.479 --> 1:27:33.480
<v Speaker 2>see through. I like it's like classy but also pursh.

1:27:34.360 --> 1:27:37.160
<v Speaker 1>And if we're talking clothes, like actual clothes that I

1:27:37.200 --> 1:27:41.679
<v Speaker 1>have to put on that are cover me high waisted gens,

1:27:41.960 --> 1:27:47.360
<v Speaker 1>high wasted bell bottom jeans like those. Yeah yeah, it's

1:27:47.400 --> 1:27:52.719
<v Speaker 1>the ass just right, accentuates the the waist flair perfect

1:27:52.880 --> 1:27:55.920
<v Speaker 1>never flair, never goes out of style. They tried, they

1:27:56.000 --> 1:27:57.639
<v Speaker 1>tried to make it go out of style, and they

1:27:57.720 --> 1:28:01.479
<v Speaker 1>always bring that bitch back. You can't. You can't because

1:28:01.520 --> 1:28:03.160
<v Speaker 1>people try to make fun of you, like why is

1:28:03.200 --> 1:28:05.880
<v Speaker 1>she wearing bell bottoms? Like they try to make bell

1:28:05.920 --> 1:28:10.400
<v Speaker 1>bottoms seem dorky every now and then in history. I

1:28:10.439 --> 1:28:13.599
<v Speaker 1>don't know where I pulled this information, but I remember

1:28:13.640 --> 1:28:20.679
<v Speaker 1>it feeling this way. Okay, oh my god, don't embarrass

1:28:20.760 --> 1:28:30.960
<v Speaker 1>us with her matches. Can't be her match? Okay, last one, Okay, three,

1:28:31.600 --> 1:28:36.360
<v Speaker 1>We're going to future. We've done past, we're in the present.

1:28:37.360 --> 1:28:41.639
<v Speaker 1>Now we're heading to the future. I also love these cards.

1:28:41.680 --> 1:28:43.280
<v Speaker 1>They have the kids ones too, And I played with

1:28:43.320 --> 1:28:45.840
<v Speaker 1>Iri and at first I could tell she she was

1:28:45.840 --> 1:28:47.120
<v Speaker 1>playing with Marae and then I came in and I

1:28:47.160 --> 1:28:48.439
<v Speaker 1>was like, oh, let me play it. She's like why.

1:28:48.640 --> 1:28:49.519
<v Speaker 1>I was like, what the fuck?

1:28:50.040 --> 1:28:52.240
<v Speaker 2>Are kids like programmed to hate the person that brought

1:28:52.280 --> 1:28:52.800
<v Speaker 2>them in this bit?

1:28:52.880 --> 1:28:56.920
<v Speaker 1>I was like why, because I want to know you,

1:28:56.960 --> 1:28:58.800
<v Speaker 1>don't you want to know me. Yeah, you know, I

1:28:59.479 --> 1:29:01.080
<v Speaker 1>like this, I did it and then she was into it.

1:29:01.160 --> 1:29:02.120
<v Speaker 1>I'm like, just shut up.

1:29:02.160 --> 1:29:04.760
<v Speaker 2>Even like the like the like irritation they get with us,

1:29:04.800 --> 1:29:07.040
<v Speaker 2>like I still I do it to you, but lik

1:29:07.080 --> 1:29:07.479
<v Speaker 2>it does.

1:29:07.320 --> 1:29:09.040
<v Speaker 1>It to me. I'm like, why am I annoying you?

1:29:09.120 --> 1:29:11.040
<v Speaker 1>What the fuck did I do? Can feed you every day?

1:29:11.120 --> 1:29:14.519
<v Speaker 1>Like what? I guess? Like the disrespect is so crazy.

1:29:17.479 --> 1:29:21.080
<v Speaker 1>I mean generally my daughter she's pretty respectful. It's just

1:29:21.080 --> 1:29:23.960
<v Speaker 1>whatever because she is so respectful, Like whenever she gets

1:29:23.960 --> 1:29:24.599
<v Speaker 1>out of line.

1:29:24.400 --> 1:29:25.200
<v Speaker 2>That's absurd.

1:29:25.840 --> 1:29:30.400
<v Speaker 1>It's absurd. I'm like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa whoa. Okay,

1:29:30.400 --> 1:29:33.000
<v Speaker 1>why see these you know what I have? I have

1:29:33.240 --> 1:29:37.200
<v Speaker 1>a please stay lit. You gotta be careful almost very

1:29:37.240 --> 1:29:51.960
<v Speaker 1>fiery fire. Yeah hmm. What quality do you want to

1:29:52.000 --> 1:30:06.360
<v Speaker 1>cultivate in yourself? Hm hmm, Like more here you go there?

1:30:06.840 --> 1:30:09.840
<v Speaker 1>Oh sorry, God, there's a few things I would like

1:30:09.880 --> 1:30:20.960
<v Speaker 1>to cultivate more. I would say I want to cultivate

1:30:21.200 --> 1:30:26.360
<v Speaker 1>more like leadership, but like really positive leadership qualities where

1:30:26.400 --> 1:30:31.760
<v Speaker 1>I'm like impactful in my leadership that it's actually changing

1:30:32.640 --> 1:30:35.759
<v Speaker 1>the world, which I think do we do and I'm doing.

1:30:35.840 --> 1:30:38.000
<v Speaker 1>But I just feel like I could be a better leader.

1:30:38.040 --> 1:30:42.480
<v Speaker 1>I could be a softer leader, maybe a more even

1:30:44.040 --> 1:30:45.439
<v Speaker 1>I don't know. I just I feel like I have

1:30:45.479 --> 1:30:49.519
<v Speaker 1>a lot more more to learn in that space because

1:30:49.520 --> 1:30:51.800
<v Speaker 1>I was an unexpected I've always been a leader. I

1:30:51.800 --> 1:30:55.360
<v Speaker 1>feel like I've always been a leader, but I feel

1:30:55.360 --> 1:30:57.920
<v Speaker 1>like I've always had these qualities in me, but I

1:30:58.000 --> 1:30:59.880
<v Speaker 1>never expected. I didn't know what it was going to be,

1:31:00.040 --> 1:31:03.559
<v Speaker 1>what it was going to look like. And now that

1:31:03.760 --> 1:31:06.080
<v Speaker 1>we're here and we lead in ways in so many

1:31:06.120 --> 1:31:08.840
<v Speaker 1>different ways. Actually is in our parenthood, our motherhood, in

1:31:08.880 --> 1:31:13.400
<v Speaker 1>our business, I think even like leading ourselves, like really

1:31:13.400 --> 1:31:17.040
<v Speaker 1>feeling confident that I can trust myself and that I

1:31:17.040 --> 1:31:19.320
<v Speaker 1>would want to be led by myself, like I would

1:31:19.360 --> 1:31:25.120
<v Speaker 1>want to work for me. Yeah, and about that, right,

1:31:27.520 --> 1:31:29.120
<v Speaker 1>I think that quality.

1:31:31.040 --> 1:31:31.519
<v Speaker 2>Mm hmm.

1:31:32.640 --> 1:31:50.080
<v Speaker 1>Maybe being even more playful serious resides design in my design.

1:31:51.360 --> 1:31:54.479
<v Speaker 1>But I want to tap into more of that freedom.

1:31:54.880 --> 1:31:58.040
<v Speaker 1>And I think I already have that in me. I

1:31:58.040 --> 1:32:00.639
<v Speaker 1>think I already live in that space, but I feel

1:32:00.680 --> 1:32:04.280
<v Speaker 1>like I can there's even more. So I'm excited and

1:32:03.600 --> 1:32:07.800
<v Speaker 1>I'm and I want to cultivate more of that playfulness

1:32:07.800 --> 1:32:12.320
<v Speaker 1>that I already zude. What about you? I think those

1:32:12.320 --> 1:32:13.120
<v Speaker 1>are really good ones.

1:32:13.320 --> 1:32:16.080
<v Speaker 2>I concur I would Yeah, I would like to be

1:32:16.120 --> 1:32:21.280
<v Speaker 2>a better leader, just hone into those skills more. I

1:32:21.320 --> 1:32:31.320
<v Speaker 2>would like to be more discipline. I procrastinate and I

1:32:31.320 --> 1:32:33.040
<v Speaker 2>have like this avoidance, Like when I know I need

1:32:33.040 --> 1:32:35.240
<v Speaker 2>to do something like call the credit man, do this,

1:32:35.439 --> 1:32:39.200
<v Speaker 2>I'm just like avoid avoid and then like I'm mad

1:32:39.240 --> 1:32:42.160
<v Speaker 2>at myself, so I do. I think it's time to

1:32:42.280 --> 1:32:44.840
<v Speaker 2>not be a twelfth grader that needs to do the

1:32:44.920 --> 1:32:51.040
<v Speaker 2>project on Friday but doesn't. And yeah, better leader and

1:32:51.160 --> 1:32:56.160
<v Speaker 2>more play. I think as there's a level of conscious play,

1:32:56.240 --> 1:33:00.240
<v Speaker 2>you have to be intentional in practice because adult hood

1:33:00.280 --> 1:33:04.519
<v Speaker 2>comes with so much stress and so many real issues

1:33:04.560 --> 1:33:09.440
<v Speaker 2>that feel urgent, and like motherhood too, and just survival,

1:33:09.960 --> 1:33:12.880
<v Speaker 2>especially living in like La and living at a you know,

1:33:12.960 --> 1:33:16.920
<v Speaker 2>just this time, this season and the world, and I

1:33:16.960 --> 1:33:20.160
<v Speaker 2>would like to just stop taking everything seriously like I'm

1:33:20.200 --> 1:33:23.920
<v Speaker 2>pretty chill. But yes, I agree the level of play

1:33:24.000 --> 1:33:31.000
<v Speaker 2>could always be up and just be more brave and

1:33:31.040 --> 1:33:33.720
<v Speaker 2>like have less self doubt. I'm like always like what

1:33:33.760 --> 1:33:34.040
<v Speaker 2>do you think?

1:33:34.080 --> 1:33:36.160
<v Speaker 1>What do you think? What do you think? Bitch?

1:33:36.320 --> 1:33:41.200
<v Speaker 2>Just to do it, you know, it's like that liver rationality,

1:33:41.280 --> 1:33:44.480
<v Speaker 2>like this perspective, this perspective, this perspective.

1:33:44.880 --> 1:33:48.559
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I think as I'm listening to talk to I

1:33:48.600 --> 1:33:51.280
<v Speaker 1>think I'm realizing that a lot of this what I

1:33:51.960 --> 1:33:55.080
<v Speaker 1>want to in like the play space is really genuinely

1:33:55.120 --> 1:33:58.280
<v Speaker 1>at its core, just more presence, like being more present

1:33:59.040 --> 1:34:03.840
<v Speaker 1>so that my natural play can really thrive. Whatever that

1:34:03.880 --> 1:34:11.160
<v Speaker 1>looks like me in my most present, relaxed like thriving,

1:34:12.000 --> 1:34:15.519
<v Speaker 1>cup filling space, Like who am I? If I can

1:34:15.560 --> 1:34:19.760
<v Speaker 1>do that? And if I can create and cultivate the

1:34:19.920 --> 1:34:21.840
<v Speaker 1>environment so that I can do that, And I think

1:34:21.880 --> 1:34:25.640
<v Speaker 1>that like I'm on a pretty good start, you know,

1:34:25.720 --> 1:34:29.200
<v Speaker 1>of creating that environment where I'm playing. Right now, I'm

1:34:29.200 --> 1:34:32.800
<v Speaker 1>sitting here with my best friend smoking a joint, you know,

1:34:32.880 --> 1:34:37.400
<v Speaker 1>debating or you know, contemplating what play is and about

1:34:37.439 --> 1:34:40.120
<v Speaker 1>to leave to Costa Rica on my retreat to play,

1:34:40.240 --> 1:34:43.120
<v Speaker 1>to go play with a bunch of amazing, incredible stranger

1:34:43.160 --> 1:34:46.120
<v Speaker 1>women that are going to be my friends in about

1:34:46.439 --> 1:34:49.840
<v Speaker 1>twelve days and the next I'm going to go on

1:34:49.920 --> 1:34:52.639
<v Speaker 1>tour and go like tap into a different space and play,

1:34:52.680 --> 1:34:56.240
<v Speaker 1>get a realm of different play. I am a different part,

1:34:56.320 --> 1:34:57.519
<v Speaker 1>and I'm going to come home and I'm going to

1:34:57.600 --> 1:35:00.479
<v Speaker 1>be a mom and I'm going to explore what play

1:35:00.600 --> 1:35:03.640
<v Speaker 1>is like for this person that I brought through and

1:35:03.680 --> 1:35:07.080
<v Speaker 1>like what we create together, and then me and my

1:35:07.160 --> 1:35:10.040
<v Speaker 1>lover are going to play and create a whole other

1:35:10.120 --> 1:35:12.360
<v Speaker 1>space of whatever the fuck that means for us. Like

1:35:13.040 --> 1:35:16.040
<v Speaker 1>I think I'm on a pretty good start. So I

1:35:16.080 --> 1:35:20.920
<v Speaker 1>think it's like trusting that experience, like remember like being

1:35:20.960 --> 1:35:23.960
<v Speaker 1>present enough to know what's happening. Like you're in the play, bitch,

1:35:24.360 --> 1:35:26.679
<v Speaker 1>you're in it. You're playing trying to get to the play.

1:35:26.720 --> 1:35:28.840
<v Speaker 1>You're in it. If you would just relax right.

1:35:28.720 --> 1:35:31.519
<v Speaker 2>And be like like, oh I asked for all this.

1:35:31.840 --> 1:35:33.840
<v Speaker 1>Oh my god, I yes, I have business calls because

1:35:33.880 --> 1:35:37.400
<v Speaker 1>that's what play involves too. This is an adult play involved. Yeah,

1:35:37.840 --> 1:35:41.120
<v Speaker 1>like yeah, that's that's real shit. So it's like, yes,

1:35:41.320 --> 1:35:48.599
<v Speaker 1>it's cultivating more presence and really looking around and opening

1:35:48.680 --> 1:35:51.840
<v Speaker 1>up my eyes and seeing like, oh, okay, wow, look

1:35:51.880 --> 1:35:55.479
<v Speaker 1>at that. Oh I'm here. Oh wow, I'm sitting in

1:35:55.520 --> 1:35:57.200
<v Speaker 1>front of cameras and no one's in the room and

1:35:57.240 --> 1:35:59.040
<v Speaker 1>I'm talking to my friend and I used to be

1:35:59.080 --> 1:36:02.479
<v Speaker 1>sitting in my living room dining room table and just

1:36:02.520 --> 1:36:07.439
<v Speaker 1>like appreciating every moment and every part of it and

1:36:07.479 --> 1:36:11.280
<v Speaker 1>acknowledging the evolution of whatever that is to you, you know,

1:36:11.520 --> 1:36:14.160
<v Speaker 1>and you start to look around and you're like, you

1:36:14.680 --> 1:36:15.760
<v Speaker 1>you start to be proud of.

1:36:15.720 --> 1:36:20.000
<v Speaker 2>Yourself because play, play really got got you here, you know,

1:36:20.200 --> 1:36:22.840
<v Speaker 2>play had you arrived at this moment, like the moment

1:36:22.880 --> 1:36:26.639
<v Speaker 2>you started to kind of like explore the play that's when.

1:36:30.200 --> 1:36:34.200
<v Speaker 1>So yeah, cultivating more play and presence.

1:36:34.560 --> 1:36:37.719
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, and you're right, like bringing that more into all

1:36:37.840 --> 1:36:40.559
<v Speaker 2>the aspects of your life, you know, and sometimes it's

1:36:40.600 --> 1:36:43.160
<v Speaker 2>it's just nice to remember that, like even like.

1:36:43.160 --> 1:36:46.439
<v Speaker 1>Thinking about like not like writing down what type of play,

1:36:46.520 --> 1:36:48.720
<v Speaker 1>Like what is the play you have with Like how

1:36:48.720 --> 1:36:52.400
<v Speaker 1>would you define the play we share and versus the

1:36:52.400 --> 1:36:55.920
<v Speaker 1>play you and Orlando share versus the play you have

1:36:56.080 --> 1:36:59.240
<v Speaker 1>with Luna versus the play you have in your business.

1:36:59.360 --> 1:37:01.760
<v Speaker 1>Like you can literally you can think of something. You

1:37:01.840 --> 1:37:04.640
<v Speaker 1>might not land on it exactly, but there is a

1:37:04.640 --> 1:37:06.880
<v Speaker 1>feeling behind each one that exists.

1:37:07.000 --> 1:37:08.560
<v Speaker 2>Well, and I also I feel like, yes, there's a

1:37:08.560 --> 1:37:11.000
<v Speaker 2>feeling behind each one that exists, and there's also like

1:37:11.080 --> 1:37:14.759
<v Speaker 2>a there's also a string that attaches them all.

1:37:14.600 --> 1:37:16.320
<v Speaker 1>To absolutely because we all kind of.

1:37:16.240 --> 1:37:17.880
<v Speaker 2>Play in the same way, because we're all.

1:37:17.880 --> 1:37:20.080
<v Speaker 1>Kind of a web. It becomes a web of the

1:37:20.160 --> 1:37:22.759
<v Speaker 1>people too, and where you guys meet in your play

1:37:22.960 --> 1:37:25.479
<v Speaker 1>on their journeys that are separate from yours, and it

1:37:25.640 --> 1:37:28.880
<v Speaker 1>just becomes this big web. And that's really like kind

1:37:28.960 --> 1:37:31.960
<v Speaker 1>of what I feel like our existence here is about

1:37:32.040 --> 1:37:35.040
<v Speaker 1>at its core, but we've we've come so far away

1:37:35.120 --> 1:37:39.840
<v Speaker 1>from from the play and what life is supposed to

1:37:39.840 --> 1:37:43.719
<v Speaker 1>be at its essence and its core. Yeah, and play

1:37:43.760 --> 1:37:49.000
<v Speaker 1>then is now almost looks like either a privilege or silly,

1:37:49.200 --> 1:37:53.519
<v Speaker 1>so like yeah, obsolete or yeah necessary.

1:37:53.160 --> 1:38:00.240
<v Speaker 2>And necessary is a big one like selfish, immature. Yeah

1:38:00.280 --> 1:38:02.920
<v Speaker 2>that's so true. But I don't know, I think our

1:38:03.000 --> 1:38:09.160
<v Speaker 2>play is like it's like care free. But also it

1:38:09.200 --> 1:38:12.920
<v Speaker 2>just reminds me of like I just remember this one time,

1:38:13.000 --> 1:38:15.320
<v Speaker 2>and like I think it was like fourth grade or

1:38:15.320 --> 1:38:19.559
<v Speaker 2>fifth grade and each class had was put in small

1:38:19.560 --> 1:38:21.320
<v Speaker 2>groups and it was the first time it was like

1:38:21.640 --> 1:38:23.960
<v Speaker 2>make a business. And I was like, that was the

1:38:23.960 --> 1:38:26.719
<v Speaker 2>first time I ever had like the concept of someone

1:38:26.760 --> 1:38:30.000
<v Speaker 2>giving me the power and like whatever, our group or

1:38:30.000 --> 1:38:33.600
<v Speaker 2>whatever like made everyone in the school collect coins. It

1:38:33.680 --> 1:38:38.519
<v Speaker 2>was like called blank coin Challenge. I'm just skipping it

1:38:38.520 --> 1:38:43.959
<v Speaker 2>because it's also her school now, but we just collected

1:38:44.000 --> 1:38:46.120
<v Speaker 2>coins from everybody in the school, and then we donated

1:38:46.160 --> 1:38:48.840
<v Speaker 2>them and I was like, oh shit, like we made

1:38:48.840 --> 1:38:51.200
<v Speaker 2>an idea and everybody listened. And then I remember, like

1:38:51.200 --> 1:38:52.679
<v Speaker 2>me and Danielle like so then we're going to start

1:38:52.680 --> 1:38:56.439
<v Speaker 2>like a rhinestone rhinestone princess T shirt company and like

1:38:56.479 --> 1:39:00.519
<v Speaker 2>writing business plans on the Microsoft word and like ironing things.

1:39:02.000 --> 1:39:06.000
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, for real. But our relationship.

1:39:05.439 --> 1:39:08.960
<v Speaker 2>Gives me that energy that like it's boundless because then

1:39:09.040 --> 1:39:11.240
<v Speaker 2>those times like I had this idea like oh I

1:39:11.280 --> 1:39:14.400
<v Speaker 2>could really do anything, I really felt that way. And

1:39:14.439 --> 1:39:17.280
<v Speaker 2>then somewhere along the way, like all these other like

1:39:17.400 --> 1:39:21.639
<v Speaker 2>doubts and things came in. And when we're together, I

1:39:21.680 --> 1:39:26.240
<v Speaker 2>feel infinite possibilities and it feels fun. It feels fun like,

1:39:26.400 --> 1:39:28.519
<v Speaker 2>oh what could we come up with? And also just

1:39:28.640 --> 1:39:32.040
<v Speaker 2>like someone who we could just get into so much

1:39:32.120 --> 1:39:34.719
<v Speaker 2>shit with, but also know we're always gonna be okay,

1:39:34.880 --> 1:39:38.799
<v Speaker 2>like somehow like okay, we're gonna get back. Yeah, someone's

1:39:38.840 --> 1:39:40.439
<v Speaker 2>gonna get us back. We're gonna figure it out. That's

1:39:40.439 --> 1:39:41.720
<v Speaker 2>that's a stranger. They're gonna know.

1:39:42.040 --> 1:39:44.880
<v Speaker 1>We can't look at our phones, but they can, like

1:39:45.320 --> 1:39:51.160
<v Speaker 1>just like the most fun, protected, free, liberating fun.

1:39:51.680 --> 1:39:53.839
<v Speaker 2>You know that I've only experienced with like a handful

1:39:53.880 --> 1:39:54.280
<v Speaker 2>of people.

1:39:55.479 --> 1:39:58.160
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, when I was thinking of our play, I felt

1:39:58.160 --> 1:40:01.960
<v Speaker 1>like I felt the word conjuring come up, like and

1:40:02.000 --> 1:40:05.240
<v Speaker 1>it's that feeling of like being able to like create anything.

1:40:05.280 --> 1:40:08.479
<v Speaker 1>It's such a creative play, but it's also like a

1:40:08.560 --> 1:40:14.600
<v Speaker 1>protective and like it's just adventurous play.

1:40:15.240 --> 1:40:17.880
<v Speaker 2>And it is adventurous. I do feel like like like

1:40:18.439 --> 1:40:21.600
<v Speaker 2>going on an exploration. That's what I feel like my

1:40:21.880 --> 1:40:24.400
<v Speaker 2>like my real adventure, Betty, Like let's let's do it.

1:40:24.439 --> 1:40:26.759
<v Speaker 2>Let's pack our bags and just get in and start

1:40:26.760 --> 1:40:29.519
<v Speaker 2>the engine. Yeah, and then like we've literally done that.

1:40:29.600 --> 1:40:31.720
<v Speaker 2>But just in life, I feel like you're my ride

1:40:31.760 --> 1:40:35.760
<v Speaker 2>or die. Like literally we're riding and we're like just

1:40:36.000 --> 1:40:38.080
<v Speaker 2>in the in the infinite universe.

1:40:38.320 --> 1:40:40.200
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, we're gonna leave our stamp somewhere along the way

1:40:40.240 --> 1:40:44.960
<v Speaker 1>in the spaceship. Never seen this before, it's ours. Give

1:40:44.960 --> 1:40:46.479
<v Speaker 1>me one of those stickers, give me one of those good.

1:40:46.320 --> 1:40:48.559
<v Speaker 2>Monsters, put it here all right, keep going.

1:40:49.840 --> 1:40:52.960
<v Speaker 1>Oh my god. Yeah, Yeah, I think that's a great idea,

1:40:53.040 --> 1:40:54.920
<v Speaker 1>is like being able to name the type of play

1:40:54.960 --> 1:40:57.280
<v Speaker 1>you create in each space and then how you can

1:40:57.280 --> 1:40:59.599
<v Speaker 1>cultivate that type of play even more in that space

1:41:00.439 --> 1:41:04.160
<v Speaker 1>and yeah, creating more play in your life.

1:41:04.520 --> 1:41:07.200
<v Speaker 2>And I think about people, even our friends or people listening,

1:41:07.479 --> 1:41:10.200
<v Speaker 2>like you bitches seem like you play a lot and

1:41:10.240 --> 1:41:11.880
<v Speaker 2>we do, and we do, and we have a lot

1:41:11.880 --> 1:41:14.360
<v Speaker 2>of stories because we've been willing to, like do all

1:41:14.360 --> 1:41:17.880
<v Speaker 2>the crazy shit, you know, Coachellas and ecstasies and mushrooms

1:41:17.920 --> 1:41:22.639
<v Speaker 2>and cars with you know, strangers and all types of shit.

1:41:22.760 --> 1:41:31.200
<v Speaker 2>But ultimately, I don't know, I just feel like even more,

1:41:31.320 --> 1:41:33.679
<v Speaker 2>do it even more, like up and just being president

1:41:33.960 --> 1:41:37.080
<v Speaker 2>and just like if you think we have juicy lives

1:41:37.120 --> 1:41:38.880
<v Speaker 2>and we still feel like we need to play more,

1:41:39.000 --> 1:41:40.920
<v Speaker 2>this is your sign you.

1:41:40.920 --> 1:41:46.280
<v Speaker 1>Haven't done enough. I haven't done enough. Yeah, yeah, I

1:41:46.320 --> 1:41:52.920
<v Speaker 1>feel that. Oh well, I love this. This is beautiful. Yes,

1:41:53.040 --> 1:41:55.920
<v Speaker 1>thank you indulging me and playing the self love game.

1:42:00.680 --> 1:42:02.439
<v Speaker 1>I think it's time to get out of here. I

1:42:02.479 --> 1:42:06.679
<v Speaker 1>think it's twenty minutes to eight pm. Perfect.

1:42:08.680 --> 1:42:11.840
<v Speaker 2>Well, you guys, you know where to find us. Good

1:42:11.880 --> 1:42:14.880
<v Speaker 2>Mom's Underscore, Bad Choices on Instagram. You can find me

1:42:15.160 --> 1:42:17.080
<v Speaker 2>Mila Underscore map with an.

1:42:17.120 --> 1:42:20.559
<v Speaker 1>H You'll find me at watch Erica. Make sure you

1:42:20.680 --> 1:42:23.040
<v Speaker 1>check all the links in this episode description. We're going

1:42:23.040 --> 1:42:25.559
<v Speaker 1>on tour we're coming to your city. We're doing a

1:42:25.600 --> 1:42:29.760
<v Speaker 1>Mother's Day retreat in May in Atlanta, and yeah, we

1:42:29.840 --> 1:42:32.280
<v Speaker 1>just we be out. We be outside, so we'd be

1:42:32.320 --> 1:42:35.559
<v Speaker 1>doing events with the people, with the community. And make

1:42:35.600 --> 1:42:38.679
<v Speaker 1>sure you check out our Patreon. This season ends in March,

1:42:38.800 --> 1:42:41.439
<v Speaker 1>and we're only going to be releasing full episodes during

1:42:41.439 --> 1:42:43.760
<v Speaker 1>our off season on Patreon, so make sure you check

1:42:43.760 --> 1:42:48.680
<v Speaker 1>out all of our Patreon offerings. And I Love you,

1:42:49.320 --> 1:42:59.719
<v Speaker 1>I Love you, Love yourself, Love on yourself, play play Bye,

1:43:00.240 --> 1:43:09.920
<v Speaker 1>I Love that soo.

1:43:12.560 --> 1:43:23.280
<v Speaker 5>So is y Ellena j Solo baa record Elas