WEBVTT - Civic Cipher 041721 ft. Shela Yu 0:00:00.080 --> 0:00:02.920 Welcome to another episode of Civic Sipher. I'my host, rams 0:00:03.000 --> 0:00:03.360 is Jah. 0:00:03.440 --> 0:00:05.840 They called me q Ward and that just so happens 0:00:05.880 --> 0:00:07.680 to be my actual name. 0:00:07.800 --> 0:00:12.360 Yes, indeed, another one for you today, a big one 0:00:12.400 --> 0:00:16.560 for you. Crazy week. You say that every week, but 0:00:16.640 --> 0:00:20.520 unfortunate saying that every week. Unfortunately, Yeah, a lot to 0:00:20.560 --> 0:00:24.799 talk about, and the sad reality is that, unfortunately this 0:00:24.840 --> 0:00:27.639 is an hour long show, and so I already know 0:00:27.720 --> 0:00:30.160 that we won't be able to cover everything that's happened 0:00:30.160 --> 0:00:36.320 in this past week, but we will cover some important things, 0:00:36.640 --> 0:00:38.280 some things that are a long time coming, and of 0:00:38.280 --> 0:00:43.560 course we'll try to discuss some of the police interactions 0:00:43.600 --> 0:00:46.879 that have taken place on the streets this week. If 0:00:46.920 --> 0:00:51.360 we have enough time, we're going to talk about what 0:00:51.440 --> 0:00:54.320 happened in Virginia with you know, the police pepper spring, 0:00:54.640 --> 0:00:59.360 the Army lieutenant pulling him out of his vehicle, and 0:00:59.440 --> 0:01:02.560 of course we have to talk about what happened in 0:01:02.600 --> 0:01:07.120 Minnesota with the police officer mistaking her taser for a 0:01:08.959 --> 0:01:14.880 gun and how that resulted in another lost life for 0:01:16.520 --> 0:01:22.559 all of us human beings. And so please stay tuned 0:01:22.600 --> 0:01:26.120 because there's those and like fifteen more that we've discussed 0:01:26.200 --> 0:01:29.240 during this week, you and I and we just know 0:01:29.319 --> 0:01:35.880 that it's very sad. You have to understand that when 0:01:35.880 --> 0:01:37.840 we do this show, we have to watch all of 0:01:37.880 --> 0:01:42.000 these videos, we have to like live that trauma, and 0:01:42.520 --> 0:01:47.960 we do it with the intent of sharing it. And 0:01:48.000 --> 0:01:50.600 again it's not always possible to share everything, but we 0:01:50.640 --> 0:01:55.720 will do our best. But before we get there, we 0:01:55.800 --> 0:02:03.560 have something that is equally important. As I stated, long overdue. 0:02:04.040 --> 0:02:07.320 You know, we we have discussed, you know, things that 0:02:07.320 --> 0:02:13.040 have happened with our Asian American Pacific Islander brothers and sisters, 0:02:13.160 --> 0:02:18.000 and how the climate in the country has kind of 0:02:18.040 --> 0:02:22.280 shifted in such a way to where they are under 0:02:22.680 --> 0:02:25.760 attack more than they have been in recent years. But 0:02:26.160 --> 0:02:29.079 according to the history of this country, it's nothing new 0:02:29.680 --> 0:02:32.240 because they, just like us, are very easy target when 0:02:32.280 --> 0:02:38.520 things become convenient for the majority. But because of you know, 0:02:38.560 --> 0:02:40.760 we had to discuss voter suppression, we had to discuss 0:02:40.800 --> 0:02:42.600 you know, all these things that were happening, and you know, 0:02:42.639 --> 0:02:44.160 the way the schedule of the show works, we didn't 0:02:44.160 --> 0:02:46.880 get to have this conversation until now, but again just 0:02:46.919 --> 0:02:52.400 as important and so on today's episode we have Shela U. 0:02:53.080 --> 0:02:56.720 So thank you very much for joining us, of course, 0:02:56.760 --> 0:03:02.240 of course, and she is a member of the AAPI 0:03:02.639 --> 0:03:06.720 Democratic Caucus as well as an activist and an artist. 0:03:06.800 --> 0:03:08.239 And I've seen some of your art as well, and 0:03:08.760 --> 0:03:15.120 so wonderful to have you on the show today to discuss, 0:03:15.760 --> 0:03:19.320 you know, the goings on with respect to your community. Now, 0:03:19.400 --> 0:03:21.920 because this is a radio show, not everyone can see 0:03:22.720 --> 0:03:25.360 what you look like, and so I'd like for you 0:03:25.400 --> 0:03:29.880 to give them a background of you know, your ethnicity, 0:03:30.120 --> 0:03:33.320 and then also, you know, talk about yourself a little bit. 0:03:33.520 --> 0:03:36.040 You know, your your place in the city and how 0:03:36.080 --> 0:03:38.520 you came to hold these positions and so forth. 0:03:38.640 --> 0:03:44.840 Yeah, I come from Chinese Chinese parents. I'm Chinese American. 0:03:44.880 --> 0:03:48.240 I identify as Chinese American. My parents immigrated here from 0:03:48.280 --> 0:03:52.400 Taiwan with the intention to raise my brother and I 0:03:52.520 --> 0:03:56.720 here in Arizona, to give us better lives. I thought 0:03:56.720 --> 0:03:59.000 that the education system was better here. So here we are, 0:03:59.800 --> 0:04:04.120 and how I came to where I'm at right now, 0:04:07.360 --> 0:04:08.360 that's a long conversation. 0:04:09.120 --> 0:04:12.720 Some people they have a story that's like propelled them 0:04:12.720 --> 0:04:14.800 into like becoming an activist. 0:04:14.400 --> 0:04:18.640 Or whatever, and so yeah, okay, I think if I 0:04:18.720 --> 0:04:22.679 go back. I was thinking about it on the way here. Actually, 0:04:22.920 --> 0:04:27.280 I always root for the underdog because I get really 0:04:27.320 --> 0:04:32.080 frustrated when I see any kind of injustice happening. I 0:04:32.120 --> 0:04:39.559 think fundamentally, I have a sense of empathy and clear 0:04:39.600 --> 0:04:43.440 conscience around humanity and just moral direction, you know, just 0:04:43.440 --> 0:04:46.520 just on the just like flatline, Let's be good people 0:04:46.560 --> 0:04:49.400 to each other, no matter what the background is, you know, 0:04:49.480 --> 0:04:53.120 we all deserve a chance to live good lives. And 0:04:53.800 --> 0:04:57.479 I was a massage therapist for ten years and have 0:04:57.960 --> 0:05:00.599 always had art and music as a part of my life, 0:05:00.760 --> 0:05:06.600 but didn't really feel like I necessarily had the confidence 0:05:06.680 --> 0:05:11.599 to go out strongly. And this last year, twenty twenty 0:05:11.720 --> 0:05:15.440 Crazy year, I had the chance to be at home 0:05:15.480 --> 0:05:18.680 for two months with nothing to do but my art 0:05:18.760 --> 0:05:22.599 and music, and so I took that time to really 0:05:23.640 --> 0:05:26.880 explore and to have that space almost like remember like 0:05:26.960 --> 0:05:28.560 back in the day when you were a kid, like 0:05:28.640 --> 0:05:31.120 summertime and time didn't really exist and you're just out 0:05:31.120 --> 0:05:34.320 there doing your thing. Like I got reacquainted with that 0:05:34.400 --> 0:05:40.400 part of me, and having that spaciousness to sit and 0:05:40.400 --> 0:05:43.440 create and just be with myself and not feel obligated 0:05:43.480 --> 0:05:49.040 to anything else gave me confidence and then wrapped up 0:05:49.080 --> 0:05:52.400 into that, which I think is really key is the 0:05:52.440 --> 0:05:57.760 social unrest. Obviously, the Black Lives Matter movement was a 0:05:57.800 --> 0:06:01.159 really big component of just the whole year twenty twenty. 0:06:01.640 --> 0:06:07.239 I think was really key. Taking the time to listen 0:06:07.760 --> 0:06:16.440 to our current civil rights leaders Tana Sea Coats, I 0:06:16.480 --> 0:06:21.600 was reading even Kendy, you know, just trying to understand 0:06:21.680 --> 0:06:24.480 where I fit into this picture and then wrapped up 0:06:24.480 --> 0:06:29.800 into that was the pandemic and being then targeted as 0:06:29.839 --> 0:06:35.440 a scapegoat and recognizing like I'm just going to jump 0:06:35.520 --> 0:06:39.520 into it. Are okay, Okay. What I think is important 0:06:39.560 --> 0:06:42.440 for Asian Americans, if we are not already feeling this, 0:06:42.560 --> 0:06:44.960 I think we need to recognize that we now know 0:06:45.040 --> 0:06:47.480 what it feels like to have targets on our backs 0:06:47.520 --> 0:06:52.919 in the modern world, and understanding that this is not 0:06:53.839 --> 0:06:57.560 new for our black and brown brothers and sisters, and 0:06:58.320 --> 0:07:01.000 to recognize that we have to do a lot of 0:07:01.120 --> 0:07:06.520 soul searching to know that our struggles, though may appear different, 0:07:06.640 --> 0:07:11.600 are actually very similar. And it is racism, it's perceptions 0:07:11.600 --> 0:07:16.000 of power, it's power over its oppression. So that is 0:07:18.240 --> 0:07:21.680 big component of what I'm trying to reckon with within myself, 0:07:21.720 --> 0:07:23.880 and so I really want to say thank you for 0:07:24.040 --> 0:07:27.080 giving me the opportunity to come set of the table. 0:07:27.440 --> 0:07:31.040 I've been having these conversations with my Asian American friends 0:07:31.080 --> 0:07:34.680 about how this is new for us. Asian Americans have 0:07:34.720 --> 0:07:36.840 been silent, and there's a big history of why that is. 0:07:36.880 --> 0:07:38.600 We can go into that, I can talk about that, 0:07:40.640 --> 0:07:43.840 but it has prevented us from feeling safe or comfortable 0:07:44.000 --> 0:07:47.160 to speak out on matters, and right now is a 0:07:47.480 --> 0:07:50.160 reckoning and we have to take the time to speak up. 0:07:50.200 --> 0:07:51.880 So here I am hello. 0:07:51.920 --> 0:07:55.679 So and we appreciate it, of course, and you're always welcome. 0:07:56.640 --> 0:07:59.280 That's what this space is for. I do want to 0:07:59.320 --> 0:08:05.040 say that you know, this show is not designed to 0:08:05.120 --> 0:08:08.760 look in the past, and we're not looking backwards in 0:08:08.840 --> 0:08:10.800 terms of you know, who did what to who that 0:08:10.880 --> 0:08:14.400 sort of a thing. We're really looking forward generally speaking. Obviously, 0:08:14.400 --> 0:08:15.960 we have to account for the past and we have 0:08:16.080 --> 0:08:19.920 to really deal with it, but that's the space that 0:08:20.200 --> 0:08:24.920 we try to maintain here. So you know, there's really 0:08:24.960 --> 0:08:28.480 no worries. We're all about community and moving forward. So again, 0:08:28.520 --> 0:08:31.160 we appreciate you coming up. This table is your table 0:08:31.200 --> 0:08:33.240 as much as it is anyone else who is a 0:08:33.240 --> 0:08:36.560 part of the human race. It is a decidedly black space, 0:08:37.040 --> 0:08:41.920 but you know, my understanding is that all people are 0:08:41.960 --> 0:08:44.360 born from out of black people, and so this is 0:08:44.360 --> 0:08:46.760 a space for all of our children, if you will, 0:08:47.600 --> 0:08:51.520 So we're going to get there together. I do want 0:08:51.559 --> 0:08:55.840 to share a quick story, and that's that I met 0:08:55.880 --> 0:08:56.920 Shella at. 0:08:56.720 --> 0:09:05.240 A stop Asian hate rally slash candlelight vigil for the 0:09:05.360 --> 0:09:11.000 victims of the shooting in Georgia. 0:09:11.880 --> 0:09:19.720 And that was heavy, and I think that I don't 0:09:19.800 --> 0:09:21.520 know why I'm saying this, but I feel like I 0:09:21.600 --> 0:09:27.560 need to say it. It felt kind of news that 0:09:27.640 --> 0:09:32.640 might be a mouthful, that might be very sad, but 0:09:33.120 --> 0:09:37.560 it's almost like when we hear about black people losing 0:09:37.559 --> 0:09:42.199 their lives at the hands of white supremacy directly, indirectly, 0:09:42.280 --> 0:09:45.480 whatever the kid, the police brutality and justice, you know, 0:09:46.320 --> 0:09:50.720 and so forth, it's almost like a normal kind of pain. 0:09:53.480 --> 0:09:58.000 And because we deal with it so frequently, maybe it's 0:09:58.120 --> 0:10:04.240 that we know how to cry in a way that 0:10:04.480 --> 0:10:08.760 is I don't know, is that I don't want to 0:10:08.800 --> 0:10:11.559 deny anyone's feelings who's lost someone or who has felt 0:10:11.600 --> 0:10:14.600 their feelings. But what I'm trying to say is that 0:10:14.800 --> 0:10:20.719 this event, the Stop Asian Hate Slash Candlelight Vigil. The 0:10:20.760 --> 0:10:25.360 pain felt different, and I was there and I mourned 0:10:25.400 --> 0:10:31.280 with a people that were coming to terms with you know, 0:10:31.360 --> 0:10:36.960 as you mentioned, a new reality, and for black folks, 0:10:37.000 --> 0:10:40.880 it's not a new reality. It still hurts. And you know, 0:10:41.040 --> 0:10:44.360 I understand that all of us human beings, no matter 0:10:44.360 --> 0:10:47.560 what side you're on, we all love our dearly departed. 0:10:48.120 --> 0:10:55.640 But to mourn with folks who had not, really it's 0:10:55.679 --> 0:11:01.360 like kind of like we're just born to cry, you know, 0:11:02.040 --> 0:11:04.720 and then when you see people who are not, it's like, 0:11:04.760 --> 0:11:07.160 oh no, in your heart goes out in a different way, 0:11:07.200 --> 0:11:10.320 I suppose. But it was very meaningful to meet you 0:11:10.360 --> 0:11:12.600 there and some of the other folks that you work with. 0:11:14.480 --> 0:11:16.200 Of course, it was a beautiful event. I was glad 0:11:16.240 --> 0:11:19.400 that I was able to participate and listen to the leadership. 0:11:21.240 --> 0:11:24.120 I participated just by you know, holding a candle. I 0:11:24.120 --> 0:11:26.320 did not speak. It was not my place to do that. 0:11:26.360 --> 0:11:29.040 I was just there to participate, and it was beautiful 0:11:29.040 --> 0:11:31.840 and it was a time for me to learn, and 0:11:32.360 --> 0:11:36.079 I think that that's something that I learned by watching 0:11:36.280 --> 0:11:38.080 so many of the other folks that came out in 0:11:38.160 --> 0:11:41.320 twenty twenty to the blm rallies, or to the Wee 0:11:41.400 --> 0:11:43.440 Rising events, or to the other events that took place 0:11:43.480 --> 0:11:46.839 on the streets where there were black spaces and black leadership. 0:11:47.480 --> 0:11:51.880 It shared black ideas with black folks and everyone else 0:11:51.920 --> 0:11:56.200 who came to support. And in this space where I 0:11:56.240 --> 0:12:01.000 met you, it was just beautiful to see all the 0:12:01.040 --> 0:12:04.720 members of all but the members that put on the 0:12:04.800 --> 0:12:09.640 event from the API community, you know, take the microphone, 0:12:09.720 --> 0:12:14.320 speak with conviction and so forth, and so not only 0:12:14.400 --> 0:12:16.679 was it beautiful, it was I think it was healthy, 0:12:16.679 --> 0:12:21.040 and it was of course necessary. I want to read something, 0:12:21.080 --> 0:12:24.240 and please forgive me. I think it's very important. I 0:12:24.280 --> 0:12:29.120 had we call her our teacher, doctor Kimilla Westernberg. She 0:12:29.240 --> 0:12:31.400 was on the show when we were first able to 0:12:31.440 --> 0:12:36.760 broach the subject of you know, stop Asian hate, and 0:12:36.840 --> 0:12:38.880 she shared a passage with me that she wanted me 0:12:38.920 --> 0:12:40.800 to read on the radio. And I've been saving it 0:12:40.840 --> 0:12:42.520 for this episode, and so I want to share it 0:12:42.520 --> 0:12:48.720 with our listeners if if there are no objections. So 0:12:49.000 --> 0:12:54.000 this is from a woman named Isabella Wilkerson. It's from 0:12:54.040 --> 0:13:00.640 a book called Cast the Origins of Our Discontents, and 0:13:00.720 --> 0:13:03.160 it goes as follows. We in the developed world are 0:13:03.280 --> 0:13:05.719 like homeowners who inherited a house on a piece of 0:13:05.800 --> 0:13:08.600 land that is beautiful on the outside, but whose soil 0:13:08.720 --> 0:13:12.920 is unstable, loam and rock heaving and contracting over generations, 0:13:13.240 --> 0:13:17.960 cracks patched, but the deeper ruptures waved away for decades centuries. 0:13:18.000 --> 0:13:21.400 Even many people may rightly say I had nothing to 0:13:21.400 --> 0:13:24.120 do with how this all started. I have nothing to 0:13:24.160 --> 0:13:27.240 do with the sins of the past. My ancestors never 0:13:27.280 --> 0:13:31.720 attacked indigenous people, never owned slaves, and yes, none of 0:13:31.800 --> 0:13:36.280 us was here when this house was built. Our immediate 0:13:36.280 --> 0:13:39.160 ancestors may have had nothing to do with it. But 0:13:39.240 --> 0:13:42.400 here we are, the current occupants of a property with 0:13:42.480 --> 0:13:46.240 stress cracks and bowed walls and fissures built into the foundation. 0:13:46.880 --> 0:13:49.480 We are the heirs to whatever is right or wrong 0:13:49.520 --> 0:13:53.679 with it. We did not erect the uneven pillars or joists, 0:13:53.960 --> 0:13:56.959 but they are ours to deal with now, and any 0:13:57.040 --> 0:14:01.680 further deterioration is in fact on our hands. Unaddressed, the 0:14:01.760 --> 0:14:05.679 ruptures and diagonal cracks will not fix themselves. The toxins 0:14:05.679 --> 0:14:10.120 will not go away, but rather will spread, leech, and mutate, 0:14:10.320 --> 0:14:13.640 as they already have. When people live in an old house. 0:14:13.840 --> 0:14:17.920 They come to adjust to the idiosyncrasies and outright dangers 0:14:17.960 --> 0:14:21.080 skulking in an old structure. They put buckets under a 0:14:21.080 --> 0:14:24.440 wet ceiling, prop up groaning floors, learn to step over 0:14:24.480 --> 0:14:29.080 that rotting wood tread in the staircase. The awkward becomes acceptable, 0:14:29.480 --> 0:14:33.800 and the unacceptable will becomes merely inconvenient. Live with it 0:14:33.840 --> 0:14:40.960 long enough, and the unthinkable becomes normal. And so I 0:14:41.080 --> 0:14:45.240 did want to talk about some of the historic events 0:14:45.320 --> 0:14:48.160 that have taken place, and I know that we don't 0:14:48.200 --> 0:14:50.280 have time to go into all of them, and so 0:14:50.360 --> 0:14:53.680 I implore you, if you're listening to our show today to 0:14:53.920 --> 0:14:59.160 check out our social media. Everything is at Civic Cipher 0:14:59.320 --> 0:15:02.000 CIVS C C I P H E R. But in 0:15:02.040 --> 0:15:05.680 this moment, I'm referring to our Instagram or our Facebook page. 0:15:05.720 --> 0:15:10.360 And we posted earlier in the weeks some examples of 0:15:11.080 --> 0:15:17.480 some historic examples of discrimination against the AAPI community in 0:15:17.840 --> 0:15:22.760 mass by the government. It's not hidden, it's not written 0:15:22.800 --> 0:15:25.920 in a funny way. It's it's not you know, disguised. 0:15:25.960 --> 0:15:30.320 You know they like to disguise racism and legally and 0:15:30.360 --> 0:15:36.800 you know, bills and whatever legislature. No, it was outright 0:15:37.400 --> 0:15:43.600 written that way. And you know, I'm not sure how 0:15:43.640 --> 0:15:46.200 it feels to grow up with that history. I'm not 0:15:46.200 --> 0:15:47.880 sure if a lot of folks know about it. But 0:15:49.440 --> 0:15:52.520 we the Black Delegation, have certainly done our best to 0:15:52.560 --> 0:15:56.520 hold this country accountable for things like that, and far 0:15:56.560 --> 0:15:58.400 be it from us to forget about those things right 0:15:58.440 --> 0:16:00.480 now when our brothers and sisters are in a time 0:16:00.480 --> 0:16:04.440 of need and we need government action and government protections 0:16:04.480 --> 0:16:07.400 and so forth. But I did want to ask you 0:16:09.680 --> 0:16:14.120 what was it that went through your head when you 0:16:14.240 --> 0:16:23.880 saw and I'm sure you did, that video of the 0:16:23.920 --> 0:16:26.200 man attacking the woman out in front of the hotel, 0:16:26.520 --> 0:16:28.280 or what went through your head when you learned that 0:16:28.480 --> 0:16:32.640 a person went into these this massage parlor and you know, 0:16:32.680 --> 0:16:34.440 what is it like to wake up on that morning? 0:16:35.840 --> 0:16:37.720 Because a lot of folks don't know what what that 0:16:37.840 --> 0:16:38.600 experience is like. 0:16:42.040 --> 0:16:48.880 Well, m it feels like an attack on your body. 0:16:50.560 --> 0:16:56.160 As a young Chinese American woman who has dealt with 0:16:56.440 --> 0:17:11.399 a number of sexualization over the years and having this 0:17:11.560 --> 0:17:15.720 is the thing about the Asian American experience is that 0:17:15.800 --> 0:17:19.240 so much are shoved under the table, and so most 0:17:19.240 --> 0:17:23.199 of the time we don't have spaces to deal with 0:17:23.240 --> 0:17:27.160 the trauma, deal with the pain. I'm really grateful I've 0:17:27.240 --> 0:17:33.080 had a group of Asian American, mostly women, that I've 0:17:33.119 --> 0:17:34.960 been able to hold space for each other because it 0:17:35.040 --> 0:17:39.200 had that particular week when I found out about the shootings. 0:17:43.160 --> 0:17:53.240 It was really painful. It was it made me walk differently, 0:17:53.280 --> 0:17:56.800 It made me carry myself differently. When I when I've 0:17:56.800 --> 0:17:59.840 walked into public spaces, it's like suddenly I'm I'm walking 0:17:59.840 --> 0:18:02.240 around with armor, and like my whole body is tense 0:18:02.760 --> 0:18:09.399 and whereas my natural demeanor is smiling, friendly. I like 0:18:09.440 --> 0:18:14.359 to say hi to everybody. But these experiences are forcing 0:18:14.440 --> 0:18:22.719 us to really question why I've had to recognize and 0:18:22.920 --> 0:18:28.360 take some time with myself and realize like part of 0:18:28.680 --> 0:18:31.720 how I carry myself and why I make a point 0:18:31.760 --> 0:18:36.680 to speak is because I want people to recognize really quickly, 0:18:36.800 --> 0:18:39.080 like hey, I'm from here. I don't have an accent. 0:18:39.400 --> 0:18:44.560 But the truth is not everybody can show up that way. 0:18:44.800 --> 0:18:50.680 Like my parents, they both have accents. It's it's harder 0:18:50.720 --> 0:18:55.800 to hide, you know, And especially right now we've got 0:18:55.840 --> 0:19:01.120 masks on, we're walking into spaces like there have been 0:19:01.119 --> 0:19:09.439 moments when I've left public places, stores, like walking at 0:19:09.440 --> 0:19:11.240 a home deep way. The other day. I actually ended 0:19:11.320 --> 0:19:15.440 up calling a friend because I was on the brink 0:19:15.440 --> 0:19:20.200 of a panic attack. It's like that feeling where I 0:19:20.200 --> 0:19:22.399 I don't know if something's about to happen, and you 0:19:22.480 --> 0:19:24.800 walk out of a public space and feel like, oh, wow, 0:19:24.920 --> 0:19:28.200 I just I survived. I didn't I survive without any 0:19:28.280 --> 0:19:33.159 racial slurs, without any dirty looks. And a lot of 0:19:33.200 --> 0:19:35.360 Asian Americans are feeling that way. We're feeling that way 0:19:35.359 --> 0:19:42.359 before these shootings because of the former occupant of the 0:19:42.400 --> 0:19:46.760 White House saying scapegoating Asians. 0:19:47.400 --> 0:19:48.640 Yeah, you don't have to say what he said. 0:19:49.080 --> 0:19:54.359 Yeah, yeah, we know what he did, causing that discomfort. 0:19:56.160 --> 0:20:00.480 And so this, this is showing the true colors of 0:20:01.480 --> 0:20:05.800 what that kind of languaging does to this like underbelly 0:20:05.800 --> 0:20:07.959 of America. Right, I've been like sitting a lot with like, 0:20:08.040 --> 0:20:12.840 oh we really, we really exist in two Americas. 0:20:13.960 --> 0:20:16.359 Actually that was kind of what I was thinking. It 0:20:16.480 --> 0:20:18.879 might feel like. Now this is not the same, And 0:20:18.880 --> 0:20:21.440 this is only me trying to empathize, not trying to 0:20:21.480 --> 0:20:26.200 write the story. But I would imagine it's like one 0:20:26.280 --> 0:20:29.560 day waking up and feeling like a stranger in your 0:20:29.560 --> 0:20:36.560 own house. You know, you mentioned your parents, and I 0:20:38.680 --> 0:20:42.960 know what it's like to worry about your parents. That 0:20:43.080 --> 0:20:46.479 feeling sucks because you can't. You have to. You know, 0:20:46.720 --> 0:20:48.520 this is capitalism. We have to get out here and 0:20:48.520 --> 0:20:51.200 get busy, so you can't. You know, watch folks every day, 0:20:51.240 --> 0:20:53.439 especially people who are vulnerable, people who don't have the 0:20:53.480 --> 0:20:59.639 same fight in them, and you recognize that they're in 0:20:59.640 --> 0:21:03.560 a vulnerable stage, and so, you know, I think it 0:21:03.760 --> 0:21:11.200 really helps to know what that's like so that we 0:21:11.359 --> 0:21:15.240 can understand and better empathize. You know, I want to 0:21:15.320 --> 0:21:19.520 share something briefly. You know, before Q and I started 0:21:19.520 --> 0:21:25.080 the show, we had a conversation with my older brother 0:21:25.359 --> 0:21:32.440 whose mother is Korean. His name is raka Iris Science 0:21:32.480 --> 0:21:35.240 of the Dilated Peopils for folks who don't know, and 0:21:35.359 --> 0:21:37.720 he's the one who made sure that we built into 0:21:37.840 --> 0:21:40.040 the show, which we put down of course, but he 0:21:40.080 --> 0:21:45.000 wanted to make it a point that it was a 0:21:45.040 --> 0:21:48.800 space where we could also allow other folks to come 0:21:48.840 --> 0:21:51.199 to the table and share their stories. It was it 0:21:51.240 --> 0:21:58.639 was important that we rise in solidarity. And you know, 0:21:58.760 --> 0:22:01.480 his mother is one of those people. You know, she's 0:22:01.520 --> 0:22:03.840 an Asian woman. I know her. She used to change 0:22:03.840 --> 0:22:08.480 my diapers when I was little, you know so, and 0:22:08.760 --> 0:22:11.200 she still loves me, she loves my kids, you know everything, 0:22:12.440 --> 0:22:15.399 the kindest person and to know how vulnerable she was 0:22:15.880 --> 0:22:22.639 and it is now is particularly concerning. But also he 0:22:23.080 --> 0:22:26.440 made sure to mention some some resources that folks can, 0:22:27.280 --> 0:22:30.480 you know, check out if they want to be more supportive. 0:22:30.520 --> 0:22:31.919 So I want to read some of the things that 0:22:32.000 --> 0:22:34.600 he mentioned, and of course I want you to offer 0:22:34.640 --> 0:22:38.159 some resources for folks who can, who are willing to 0:22:38.200 --> 0:22:41.840 offer even just showing up and holding a candle, they 0:22:41.880 --> 0:22:44.200 want to donate money, any anything like that. But before 0:22:44.200 --> 0:22:51.840 we get there, you know, I checked out some resources 0:22:51.880 --> 0:22:55.600 on social media and if you're on Instagram, these will 0:22:56.080 --> 0:23:00.920 really work for you. One is Asians with Attitudes on Instagram. 0:23:00.920 --> 0:23:03.000 If you look those guys up there right on top 0:23:03.080 --> 0:23:05.560 of this, they have a lot of things that really 0:23:05.920 --> 0:23:10.960 shine a light into the AAPI community and experience that 0:23:11.000 --> 0:23:14.560 you otherwise would not know about. And we follow them 0:23:14.600 --> 0:23:17.119 from the Civic Sipher page and we've been able to 0:23:17.320 --> 0:23:19.840 have establish a dialogue and let them know that we're 0:23:20.000 --> 0:23:23.880 willing to support whenever we can. Another one is at 0:23:24.160 --> 0:23:28.680 Next Shark, which is another group that does the same thing. 0:23:28.880 --> 0:23:32.040 And then there's another one Asians never die. I like 0:23:32.119 --> 0:23:35.760 that word or I like that name. But that's another one, 0:23:37.080 --> 0:23:40.919 you know that he mentioned. And then of course we 0:23:40.960 --> 0:23:44.119 went on to have a conversation about the history between 0:23:44.400 --> 0:23:47.280 black people and Asian people in this country and how 0:23:47.480 --> 0:23:49.240 you know, in a lot of ways we've been able 0:23:49.280 --> 0:23:51.120 to support each other, but in a lot of ways 0:23:51.200 --> 0:23:53.280 there's still a lot of growth that we need in 0:23:53.280 --> 0:23:56.159 that relationship so that we can really be there for 0:23:56.200 --> 0:23:58.399 each other in the ways that are really important. So 0:23:58.520 --> 0:24:00.600 you know, more to come on that, But before we 0:24:00.640 --> 0:24:04.200 go to break, I want you to mention any resources 0:24:04.200 --> 0:24:07.320 that you may know that books can take advantage of. 0:24:07.520 --> 0:24:12.119 Yeah, something I think is great is these bystander intervention 0:24:12.720 --> 0:24:17.840 workshops that have been coming out. I was on the 0:24:17.880 --> 0:24:22.359 Asian Americans Advancing Justice website. They're out of Chicago and 0:24:22.400 --> 0:24:26.320 they do online workshops and so a lot of them 0:24:26.320 --> 0:24:28.359 are flow right now, but stay on and like you know, 0:24:28.440 --> 0:24:30.600 check them out and make sure that you can see 0:24:30.600 --> 0:24:34.040 what they're doing. And then also in Arizona there's a 0:24:34.200 --> 0:24:38.520 z A A NHPI for Equity and they do a 0:24:38.560 --> 0:24:40.359 lot of great work to provide resources. 0:24:40.520 --> 0:24:41.520 More time, what was that. 0:24:41.720 --> 0:24:47.479 A Z A NHPI for equity. Okay, they've got a 0:24:47.480 --> 0:24:48.600 lot of great resources. 0:24:48.720 --> 0:24:52.560 Awesome, Okay, very good. So a lot to work with there. 0:24:54.400 --> 0:24:56.880 And if you're just tuning into Civic Cipher, I'm your host, Rams, 0:24:56.880 --> 0:24:59.399 It's Josh. They call me q Ward Special guests in 0:24:59.440 --> 0:25:02.880 the building. Shella, you was a member of the A 0:25:02.880 --> 0:25:08.200 A p I Democratic Caucus who is just a wonderful 0:25:08.240 --> 0:25:13.480 human being and helping share an experience with all of 0:25:13.560 --> 0:25:15.920 us that we may not know about. And of course 0:25:15.960 --> 0:25:20.959 resources to help support our Asian American and Pacific Islander 0:25:21.000 --> 0:25:25.200 brothers and sisters. And uh, we also need to talk 0:25:25.240 --> 0:25:32.400 about the goings on of this week. Q I want 0:25:32.440 --> 0:25:36.440 you to do this because this week has been really 0:25:36.440 --> 0:25:38.360 tough for me. I know it's been super tough for you, 0:25:39.240 --> 0:25:41.600 but I want to share a story before I pass 0:25:44.720 --> 0:25:48.240 the mic off. You know, as as I mentioned when 0:25:48.240 --> 0:25:54.439 we started the show, we have to watch all of 0:25:54.480 --> 0:25:57.399 these videos. It's not like you know that if you 0:25:57.560 --> 0:26:01.000 if you know, you know that at a point you 0:26:01.160 --> 0:26:02.720 just don't need to see it. You know, the way 0:26:02.720 --> 0:26:04.800 the story goes, you don't need to see a human 0:26:04.840 --> 0:26:08.119 being get executed, or you don't need to see someone 0:26:08.200 --> 0:26:12.840 get hurt. It doesn't it's not cool to watch it. 0:26:12.560 --> 0:26:16.959 It's so taxing and draining emotionally on your spirit. And 0:26:17.000 --> 0:26:19.760 then once everything is drained from your spirit, you find 0:26:19.760 --> 0:26:23.160 that all that's left in that space is tears. And 0:26:23.240 --> 0:26:25.320 you know, you try to be as tough guy as 0:26:25.320 --> 0:26:27.400 you want to be. You know, I don't really try 0:26:27.440 --> 0:26:32.920 to be a tough guy, but you know, I'm old 0:26:33.000 --> 0:26:35.240 enough to feel what I feel and not makeing excuses 0:26:35.280 --> 0:26:37.280 for it. And I really do feel it. But this 0:26:37.320 --> 0:26:45.480 week I was. I picked up my son from school. 0:26:45.840 --> 0:26:48.840 You know, he's in kindergarten. You got out at ten 0:26:48.960 --> 0:26:52.480 thirty or whatever. And then we went to grandma's house, 0:26:54.480 --> 0:26:57.520 and I know she's listening, So I love you, Gotti. 0:27:00.080 --> 0:27:02.160 We went there and you my son got to hang 0:27:02.160 --> 0:27:03.639 out with his grandma, and then he went upstairs to 0:27:03.640 --> 0:27:06.760