Speaker 1: You are listening to What in the Winkler and iHeartRadio podcast.
Speaker 2: Welcome back to the next episode.
Speaker 3: Of What in the Winkler with my.
Speaker 1: Two guests, Max Winkler and Henry Winkler. Hi, I just
Speaker 1: want to say, I really don't think that there's like
Speaker 1: a family podcast out there.
Speaker 2: Are king No, I'm not joking.
Speaker 4: Is there probably one million?
Speaker 2: Not one that I know of.
Speaker 1: I mean have sibling revelry, which is amazing, but that's siblings.
Speaker 1: They don't have like a with like all the family. Like,
Speaker 1: it's not like there's like a family.
Speaker 4: I love how you drink water, just full mouth over
Speaker 4: the spout like my daughter. Like it's a hot day
Speaker 4: in the forties and you're drinking out of a hose.
Speaker 4: You suck it down.
Speaker 5: When what can I ask you a question?
Speaker 4: I'm over caffeinated.
Speaker 5: You are okay because you come here with your beautiful
Speaker 5: wife and your baby. Don't girl on the weekends. I
Speaker 5: never see this.
Speaker 4: Personality because I want to be on camera, gotcha.
Speaker 5: I'm with you, okay.
Speaker 4: I'm thinking about starting on Instagram and you should.
Speaker 5: You should because you have a lot to say.
Speaker 3: I'm just telling you right now. He he is on it. Today,
Speaker 3: he is, he.
Speaker 5: Is, I am prepared.
Speaker 4: I want to get real. Let's get real and like,
Speaker 4: let's talk about this. I don't want to talk about
Speaker 4: the ski trip. I want to talk about what we
Speaker 4: didn't even talk about.
Speaker 3: Oh wait, we didn't tell that story.
Speaker 4: We can that story. Wait, a ski trip changed my mind.
Speaker 4: Let's do it. You go first. Wow.
Speaker 2: One time my dad took Max and I.
Speaker 3: To where were we?
Speaker 5: We were in New Mexicano.
Speaker 3: We're in New Mexico and Zanta Fe.
Speaker 4: And Mom passed on the family day.
Speaker 2: She didn't want to go on to New Mexico, didn't.
Speaker 5: She respect fancy should we go along?
Speaker 2: No, No, we're just talking about this, just the squad valley, Okay.
Speaker 1: So we went away and we were driving, I think,
Speaker 1: to a reservation right to see.
Speaker 3: You were taking us to see.
Speaker 4: I remember you were very connected to the Native American story.
Speaker 1: You were because you had taken Jed to see the
Speaker 1: Hopeye reservation. So you were so excited, and I don't know,
Speaker 1: something happened and you pulled over on the side of
Speaker 1: the highway and you got out of the car.
Speaker 5: Yes, I did buy like a crazy mistake life.
Speaker 3: And Max and I locked the doors yes, you did.
Speaker 5: You were on the side of the road for about
Speaker 5: a half an hour.
Speaker 2: And we were laughing so hard.
Speaker 5: It was so funny and it was so cold, and
Speaker 5: I couldn't get back in the car.
Speaker 4: I think we saw Geronimo on that trip. Who I
Speaker 4: think we saw the movie Geronimo in Santa Fe on
Speaker 4: that trip. That's not very important to start. You'd love
Speaker 4: West Study, Okay, Wes Study is great, one of my
Speaker 4: favorite actors.
Speaker 5: He was just in that wonderful series Reservation. He was.
Speaker 4: I just rewatched Last Mohigans and I remember that at
Speaker 4: a very early age, you got me a signed headshot
Speaker 4: from West Study. Yeah, it meant a great deal to me.
Speaker 5: I have to say that that movie, that actor, uh,
Speaker 5: just became like my symbols.
Speaker 4: I remember coming home from school one day and hearing
Speaker 4: the soundtrack blasting from the house, and I tracked the
Speaker 4: source of it, and you were sitting on a small
Speaker 4: stool by yourself in my room blasting it and doing
Speaker 4: a little jig with your feet. And I remember thinking,
Speaker 4: at a very early age, something else must be going
Speaker 4: on here. But here's what's interesting about this podcast. Here's
Speaker 4: what's interesting about this podcast. You ready for him. Are
Speaker 4: you ready for it?
Speaker 5: And I'm sitting on a on a stool.
Speaker 4: Three pm on a school day. No one in the
Speaker 4: world has ever thought that you would be hosting a
Speaker 4: podcast and that we would be talking about West Study
Speaker 4: on it, So we've broken the universe. No one study
Speaker 4: is exactly so that's why this is interesting.
Speaker 3: Okay, I'll look him up when we get when we're down.
Speaker 5: I believe he's Native American.
Speaker 2: Okay, great, Okay, go ahead.
Speaker 3: Bless West Studio.
Speaker 1: I'm excited to know. I'm excited. I can't wait to
Speaker 1: get to know him. How would you describe the dynamic
Speaker 1: between Max and I?
Speaker 5: I would I would say ninety nine percent love and
Speaker 5: then one percent.
Speaker 1: You make him insane, sane, he makes me insane to
Speaker 1: ok we have gotten into.
Speaker 4: Full full Also it's also also I make her insane.
Speaker 1: We get into we've gotten into like full, yes, full
Speaker 1: this fight, I have had to hold him around his
Speaker 1: waist and hold his arms to his waist so that
Speaker 1: he could not go after you.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, I remember twice that it really happened. I
Speaker 4: remember once really happened when Matt Dines was over. Did
Speaker 4: you talk about me trying to push you on the stairs.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we talked about that a few did you.
Speaker 4: Talk about when you told me but.
Speaker 2: The girl that you had a crush on I didn't like you?
Speaker 4: Yeah, and she did, but she did by the way,
Speaker 4: by the way, she's never settled down.
Speaker 3: Okay.
Speaker 4: And I grabbed you by the arms.
Speaker 2: And I think you were sure.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I said something I don't know even were being annoying,
Speaker 1: and I was like, and by the way, she'll never
Speaker 1: like you back or something.
Speaker 4: She did like me, by the okay, And I bought
Speaker 4: her a chrome Heart's ring, probably a little too early
Speaker 4: in the court ship.
Speaker 3: I want to say something.
Speaker 1: Chrome Heart's Ace really really wants that for back. It's
Speaker 1: thirteen hundred dollars for a pair of sweatpants, Like wow,
Speaker 1: I almost passed.
Speaker 5: No, No, I can get your pair of sweatpants and
Speaker 5: we'll just print chrome heart on it.
Speaker 1: I was shook. And you we've talked about that. I'm
Speaker 1: not great with money, and I was shook. To my
Speaker 1: court you're not.
Speaker 5: Okay. Now we're keeping it real.
Speaker 2: We're keeping it real.
Speaker 4: To it wasn't that real.
Speaker 5: So you did. We went right from you left me
Speaker 5: outside in the cold, locked out.
Speaker 1: Now, so our relationship so our relationship is definitely like
Speaker 1: ninety nine point nine. Also, I feel like it's only
Speaker 1: gotten better as we've.
Speaker 5: We'll tell you what I have seen over the years.
Speaker 5: The one thing is Max is amazingly wise. He is
Speaker 5: wise naturally. I'm telling you it is like cosmically wise.
Speaker 5: And I have seen him walk around our living room
Speaker 5: in this house when you are distraught, you are filled
Speaker 5: with tears, and him telling you everything he could think
Speaker 5: of in order to calm you down.
Speaker 2: Would you say, it's often that I'm distraught?
Speaker 4: And do you think we call that Tuesday? I think
Speaker 4: we'd call that Monday before lunch. Oh god, I think
Speaker 4: we call that Thursday at the farm shop between seven
Speaker 4: and four twelve at night.
Speaker 2: Okay, thanks guys, I appreciate it.
Speaker 5: It's okay.
Speaker 3: Do you feel like.
Speaker 1: There was some sort of So there's three of us,
Speaker 1: but Jed was gone at college, you know by the
Speaker 1: time I was nine and Max was six, and I'm
Speaker 1: going to have him on to tell his side and
Speaker 1: his version. But would you say that do you think
Speaker 1: that you and Mom, to the best of your ability,
Speaker 1: treated Max and I the same.
Speaker 5: The all three of you.
Speaker 3: Well, yeah, but Max.
Speaker 1: Is here, so yeah, yeah, yeah, no, I mean we're
Speaker 1: all different kids. But did you have the same rules
Speaker 1: for us?
Speaker 5: All we had the same rules, and I have to
Speaker 5: say that each of you followed the rules differently. This
Speaker 5: is the amazing thing about being a parent. You can
Speaker 5: have multiple children pretty much from the same person, and
Speaker 5: they are completely different being I have that right now.
Speaker 5: Children come onto the earth fully who they are, and
Speaker 5: all we can do is guide them. We can't, you know, really,
Speaker 5: they have their own nature. Itazing and once you submit
Speaker 5: to that, parenting is a lot easier.
Speaker 3: So would you say we're treated the same.
Speaker 5: I think you were treated as best as we could
Speaker 5: the same. Remember, each of you were so different. Like, Okay,
Speaker 5: you had a curfew. You had to be home at
Speaker 5: a certain time. Every time you missed your curfew, you
Speaker 5: lost ten minutes. So eventually you went out, got all ready,
Speaker 5: You went out at eight o'clock, and you were back
Speaker 5: at eight fifteen.
Speaker 2: Right, and Max never missed a curfew.
Speaker 5: Max missed curfews, but he always made sure he called
Speaker 5: to say he was going to be late, which was
Speaker 5: the rule.
Speaker 3: So did I Max, Like would get drunk in the closet.
Speaker 5: Max would get my curfew that way, Okay, can I
Speaker 5: just say that is something I never did that. No,
Speaker 5: you know you're you're a wonderful person. You're a wonderful daughter,
Speaker 5: especially now in your forties. You are so caretaking.
Speaker 2: Yeah, really, you didn't talk about that caretaking.
Speaker 3: You don't think I'm a caretaker.
Speaker 4: I think you are.
Speaker 5: Good at that, very good, very lovely, very thoughtful.
Speaker 4: What do you want, Like, what's the point?
Speaker 5: Like?
Speaker 4: Great?
Speaker 5: Great?
Speaker 1: I'm trying to think, like, what was the most important
Speaker 1: thing that dad, that and Mom instilled in us as siblings?
Speaker 4: Siblings?
Speaker 1: I think Mom and Dad we both didn't have a
Speaker 1: close relationship with their siblings, and so it was always
Speaker 1: very important for you. That is true too, for us
Speaker 1: to always remember that, like, that is true to stay close.
Speaker 4: I only remember having a lot of fun with you, yeah,
Speaker 4: and playing games and thinking you and your friends were
Speaker 4: so cool and wanting to we were be around you.
Speaker 5: You know what I love when we went out into
Speaker 5: the world.
Speaker 1: When he says he loves my friends, it's because he
Speaker 1: slept with more than half of them, just so you.
Speaker 5: Know, Okay, it's a man of taste.
Speaker 4: So never I met a friend is always.
Speaker 3: I didn't like It's really true.
Speaker 2: So gross.
Speaker 5: All right, But when we went out, as when we
Speaker 5: went out, and let's say we were in a department store,
Speaker 5: I always let you go and do what you needed
Speaker 5: to do and be around and take a walk. But
Speaker 5: when I said it was time, we had to go
Speaker 5: now and we had to leave together, you guys always listen.
Speaker 4: And we knew that because you would do your little whistle.
Speaker 3: We have a family whistle. To your family whistle, No
Speaker 3: I can't.
Speaker 4: It was like this, that's exactly right, and you would
Speaker 4: hear it and you'd be at the department store and
Speaker 4: be like, you gotta go.
Speaker 5: We had a family whistle. Yes, one of the few
Speaker 5: things I inherited from my father.
Speaker 2: Got the family whistle. Oh my god.
Speaker 3: And also remember what Dad would do when we would
Speaker 3: hold hands.
Speaker 4: Oh, you would always do that.
Speaker 1: He'd squeeze your hand three times, I love you, and
Speaker 1: then you'd squeeze it back I love you too.
Speaker 5: Yeah. Yeah, it made me so happy. Oh my god.
Speaker 1: The family whistle just brought me like to my knees.
Speaker 1: I totally that is so funny.
Speaker 5: And thank you for being able to whistle. Yeah I
Speaker 5: can't do that anymore.
Speaker 4: Yeah, my great pleasure.
Speaker 5: Yeah, but let me ask you a question. Max. When
Speaker 5: you directed your first movie, Ceremony, and we did press together,
Speaker 5: you said in the media one of your biggest problems
Speaker 5: growing up was that you were loved too much.
Speaker 4: I said that to the media.
Speaker 5: Yes, you did.
Speaker 4: All twelve people who covered that movie.
Speaker 5: I believe that.
Speaker 4: Oh my god, everything is great, and everything is Yes,
Speaker 4: then it's hard for me to accept.
Speaker 3: You're okay. You're okay.
Speaker 4: No, I know you're really I just wanted to.
Speaker 5: Know if why, or what was the genesis of that,
Speaker 5: because let's get real. I said to you, if I
Speaker 5: did it again, I would do it exactly the same way.
Speaker 5: And you were punished, but you you didn't require a
Speaker 5: lot of punishment.
Speaker 4: And to be fair, whenever you spanked me, you always
Speaker 4: asked me to spank you.
Speaker 5: Back my god, Oh my god. Okay, that's great.
Speaker 4: You want to get real.
Speaker 5: Let's get real. So let's get real. When did I
Speaker 5: spank you?
Speaker 4: Never wanted to be spanked right back.
Speaker 5: Never did I spank you. But anyway, let's go.
Speaker 4: I don't remember why I said that. I was twenty
Speaker 4: five and other movie coming.
Speaker 1: By the way, that's exactly what you've always said that
Speaker 1: I thought I was criticized too much, and you felt
Speaker 1: you were you were not criticized enough.
Speaker 4: I've always looked for validation from colder parental figures, and
Speaker 4: I think that was because I was in such a
Speaker 4: warm house and honestly, well, can I see the things
Speaker 4: I've seen. I'll take it all.
Speaker 5: Right, So let me let me start anew and just
Speaker 5: say you're an asshole.
Speaker 4: I love you, and I feel really grateful for the
Speaker 4: example that you set as a father and a provider,
Speaker 4: and I wouldn't change anything now and I we are
Speaker 4: the way we are because of that. And if I
Speaker 4: said that, I probably I don't know why I said
Speaker 4: that I was twenty.
Speaker 3: You've said it many times.
Speaker 4: Yeah, you've said that. Not for a second time, no,
Speaker 4: but it.
Speaker 5: Has always I've always wanted to really get to the
Speaker 5: root of that because I didn't understand it, and I
Speaker 5: understand it.
Speaker 4: I think I was over praised. I think like that's possible,
Speaker 4: and it's not.
Speaker 2: I feel like there's never enough praise for me. Just
Speaker 2: so you both know, Yeah, but you know what.
Speaker 5: I think also, that is part of your own nature,
Speaker 5: you know. It's the lack of self I felt growing up.
Speaker 5: I know where it came from. But I know that feeling,
Speaker 5: so I know how you feel, Zoe.
Speaker 4: But that's interesting because it's it's all part of the
Speaker 4: inner generational chain, because I think you really are determined
Speaker 4: to make your kids feel so seen and heard because
Speaker 4: you didn't feel seen in her.
Speaker 3: That's not true.
Speaker 1: I actually did feel very seen and heard by mom,
Speaker 1: and I always felt like I really I felt beyond
Speaker 1: scene and beyond herd and I felt but I felt
Speaker 1: sometimes misunderstood because I'm so.
Speaker 3: Sensitive and emotional.
Speaker 1: I felt like sometimes I wasn't taken seriously with what
Speaker 1: I was feeling, or I have sometimes a hard time
Speaker 1: explaining what I'm feeling without getting sort of like lost in.
Speaker 3: The emotion of it all.
Speaker 5: You know what I want to say, that that is
Speaker 5: in your core?
Speaker 3: Yeah, you know.
Speaker 1: I'm just say I'm a very sensitive person and I
Speaker 1: don't have the ability. One thing about me is that
Speaker 1: you always know exactly what I'm thinking, so you never
Speaker 1: have to guess I hate that feeling and so, and
Speaker 1: for better or for worse, You'll never I'll never You'll
Speaker 1: never think like, oh, is she upset with me?
Speaker 3: Because I'll be very clear that I am.
Speaker 5: I don't do well with people putting a spin on
Speaker 5: their answer, and it is not directly clearly exactly yes
Speaker 5: or no or whatever.
Speaker 1: But I definitely felt seen and heard by Mom and Dad.
Speaker 1: I just felt a little bit misunderstood, and my version
Speaker 1: of like what was the truth was my version of
Speaker 1: the truth, and so I just felt like sometimes I
Speaker 1: was misunderstood.
Speaker 5: But you know what a parent you there, there are
Speaker 5: so many things coming at you so quickly, so often
Speaker 5: that you you have to pick and choose. Yeah, you know,
Speaker 5: and sometimes, oh my godness, Max just reached over our
Speaker 5: couch and gave his sister a kiss on the films.
Speaker 5: All right, I forgot we're modern.
Speaker 4: But I guess the thing I'm thinking about is who cares?
Speaker 5: Who cares about? What?
Speaker 3: What does wrong with you?
Speaker 5: We're talking about Max?
Speaker 4: I feel or heard like you had everything, Max, Like,
Speaker 4: what are we talking about? It's not it's a difference,
Speaker 4: and like you loved like they did the best they could.
Speaker 5: Max.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And I'm not saying yeah, so you felt too praised?
Speaker 1: You had everything? The most fucking thing I've ever heard
Speaker 1: nine times in the media.
Speaker 5: About it, but we are talking about it, and I
Speaker 5: have to tell you right now, your daughter is becoming
Speaker 5: a self. I mean, her personality is emerging, and it's.
Speaker 4: Because I don't praise her that she has such a
Speaker 4: good personality.
Speaker 2: You don't praise her, no, praise her all.
Speaker 4: I don't raise her. I praise her when she does
Speaker 4: things deserving of praise every three or four minutes. When
Speaker 4: she does things deserving of praise, are you praise I
Speaker 4: can't tell her just joking, of course I praise her.
Speaker 4: I love her.
Speaker 5: But like, also, like what I'm saying, do you understand
Speaker 5: that people who are going on are having exactly the
Speaker 5: same thoughts or problems or conversation And he.
Speaker 1: Doesn't understand because he just told me on the prior
Speaker 1: episode last week that he actually doesn't give a fuck
Speaker 1: about like saying hello to people or do things like
Speaker 1: that because because no, no, no.
Speaker 5: But he is, like.
Speaker 4: I disagree with that. I don't think I have a
Speaker 4: d d oh, yeah's on film.
Speaker 5: I don't have to say he leaned across and gave
Speaker 5: his sister a kiss.
Speaker 4: But like, I just like what you Let's not talk
Speaker 4: about being like not seen or heard greatly?
Speaker 5: Okay, let's what would.
Speaker 3: Because would you like to talk about Max?
Speaker 4: Because talk about the spankings.
Speaker 1: You are unable to get into the real thing about life,
Speaker 1: and you say you try to be funny and you
Speaker 1: talk about this.
Speaker 4: Okay, so let's get into the real stuff. I just like,
Speaker 4: I feel like I'm guessing that people on the podcast,
Speaker 4: your listeners know already that you felt misunderstood as a.
Speaker 2: Kid, and we've never actually talked about it.
Speaker 4: Okay, great.
Speaker 1: Also, I want to just say something that for this
Speaker 1: is my experience, and so it's what if and if
Speaker 1: I I think that it is really important to say, like, yes,
Speaker 1: I did have more than I could ever hope for
Speaker 1: in the world, and I still feel sometimes like I
Speaker 1: don't know, I don't feel good enough about myself.
Speaker 3: I think that's like a really right. Oh, thank you
Speaker 3: so much. That's interesting to you. Okay, guys, we found
Speaker 3: something that's interesting to Max Winkler.
Speaker 1: God bless very Okay, great, great, oh perfect, Okay, thank you.
Speaker 5: Here it is. It's go go back to exactly what
Speaker 5: we said. No matter what your experience is, your core
Speaker 5: doesn't always filter what is happening in the real world
Speaker 5: with what is happening emotionally in your mind. The way
Speaker 5: your mind is wired.
Speaker 3: Oh so in life.
Speaker 1: You're constantly like, if I do this, if I get
Speaker 1: this job, if I lose this amount of weight, if
Speaker 1: I marry that guy, I'll feel good. And sometimes it
Speaker 1: is only it is only in yourself, that's right.
Speaker 4: It's an unfillable hole, that's right. I think that not.
Speaker 5: You, everybody for everyone, everybody, not.
Speaker 4: You, Zo. There are parts of you that are an
Speaker 4: unfillable hole.
Speaker 5: But it is. But Max, sometimes I you are so
Speaker 5: lost in the universe.
Speaker 4: Prove it. I'm not lost. There are things about me
Speaker 4: that are the way I am. It drives my wife crazy.
Speaker 4: I forget to close drawers. I am who I am?
Speaker 3: Okay, well, I think you know what I am? Who
Speaker 3: I am is an excuse. I think you can say
Speaker 3: I am.
Speaker 4: Saying I'm trying the best I can is and.
Speaker 3: Didn't say that word.
Speaker 1: Always never said that. I don't ever say that. No,
Speaker 1: because mom told me that she hates that.
Speaker 2: What Oh no, wait, my mom.
Speaker 3: Says that all the time. My husband told me, Bob.
Speaker 5: Told me hold my fingernails.
Speaker 3: Yeah, okay, guys, you know what long fingernails.
Speaker 4: I know.
Speaker 3: I love that.
Speaker 5: I've seen It's been maybe the shade. You haven't seen
Speaker 5: the shade I mean, it's long, it's been something.
Speaker 2: It's been, it's been a new it's been my vibe
Speaker 2: for a quite some time now.
Speaker 1: Thanks so much. Anna who does my nails, is so
Speaker 1: incredibly talented and I am obsessed with her. Anyways, I'll
Speaker 1: take that as accomplishment.
Speaker 5: That is a wonderful thing. The when you actually see
Speaker 5: the people in front of you, whoever they are doing
Speaker 5: your nails, doing your hair, serving you dinner, When you
Speaker 5: actually see them there are it's just human beings are
Speaker 5: just an incredible thing. I am here first. I'm so
Speaker 5: happy I'm on this earth.
Speaker 3: Me too, I'm thrilled, thank God.
Speaker 1: So what I was saying was that I think it's
Speaker 1: important to always talk if we're talking about, like talking
Speaker 1: about the truth is that people assume things are one way,
Speaker 1: just by the way you look at them, or just
Speaker 1: by the way you look, or just by the life
Speaker 1: that people think.
Speaker 3: You live, right, and it's important.
Speaker 1: I also agree saying I'm doing the best I can
Speaker 1: is overused and means nothing, because you can always do better.
Speaker 1: And I do feel like, for all, I have a
Speaker 1: million faults and I have a million shortcomings, but I
Speaker 1: really do try to work on myself and to do better.
Speaker 1: I really do.
Speaker 4: And you don't have a million faults or everyone does,
Speaker 4: not a million, not a million, and I have.
Speaker 5: Both of you have done extraordinary work on improving yourself
Speaker 5: as beings on the earth.
Speaker 2: You have to you constantly have to change a while
Speaker 2: to get there.
Speaker 5: I started ten.
Speaker 4: Years got into therapy a little late, I think ten years.
Speaker 3: Ago, but you gave us the biggest gift.
Speaker 2: You started me at seven for therapy, very very early,
Speaker 2: seven years old. Doctor barks at.
Speaker 5: That time a chunk of Swiss cheese with a lot
Speaker 5: of holes, and I am working on becoming a chunk
Speaker 5: of Cheddar.
Speaker 1: Used to describe me as a cupcake that wasn't fully
Speaker 1: baked inside that I was still like a little raw
Speaker 1: or like a turtle without its shell. Because everything, because
Speaker 1: everything really just like made me feel. I feel everything
Speaker 1: so deeply, and I think that there was like that
Speaker 1: is a muscle that you have to exercise, muscle trying
Speaker 1: to not take everything, you know.
Speaker 5: Rowing some people who literally cut off all of that feeling. Yeah,
Speaker 5: and then they are they are last in that way.
Speaker 4: Yeah, you know, you would have benefited from some tough love.
Speaker 1: I think I have tough love. Mom, is very tough
Speaker 1: but for you, but for.
Speaker 5: Me, huh oh the meow turned out.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't really, I don't.
Speaker 1: Tough love doesn't work for me, and it doesn't work
Speaker 1: for my some one of like a few of my kids.
Speaker 1: It just I don't feel like that. Also, I think
Speaker 1: is a myth. I mean, yes, if I was like
Speaker 1: a drug addict or something.
Speaker 5: But likes but it works specifically.
Speaker 1: And and some people, yeah, and some people that's what
Speaker 1: they need. And clearly that's what you needed more of.
Speaker 1: That's not what I needed more of.
Speaker 5: But it never dawned on me. I never that he
Speaker 5: needed tough love. All I knew he didn't.
Speaker 2: He's just fine.
Speaker 3: He needed nothing else.
Speaker 5: He could never have been tougher than I was because
Speaker 5: of what I went.
Speaker 1: I would never, by the way, if I were like that,
Speaker 1: if I was tough on my kids, they would feel
Speaker 1: So it's funny because actually last night I Jewles had
Speaker 1: his championship baseball game.
Speaker 5: I was there.
Speaker 3: Yeah, oh, you.
Speaker 2: Were right, and he last.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but he he played.
Speaker 2: He played amazing in the last game, this nice game.
Speaker 5: Played. He made two outs, fielding the ball and throwing
Speaker 5: the unbelievable.
Speaker 1: And he hit amazing, but but it was the other
Speaker 1: So the coaches are coaches we've never had before, and
Speaker 1: and they were tough. And one of them was extremely tough,
Speaker 1: and his son was on the team.
Speaker 5: With the kid with the man with the red sweaterir No.
Speaker 1: The other one, and he was very tough on his son.
Speaker 1: And I watched the whole thing and it was funny
Speaker 1: because I was watching it because Jewels.
Speaker 3: Sometimes Jewles is.
Speaker 1: Very emotional, and so when he makes a mistake or
Speaker 1: when when they lost the game, he was really sad.
Speaker 1: He was crying, and I wanted him to just like
Speaker 1: make the mistake during the game and move on and
Speaker 1: just like go on to the next play. But he
Speaker 1: gets emotional. And I was watching this man speak to
Speaker 1: his son and it was like very very, very tough,
Speaker 1: and the kid was still crying and the kids still
Speaker 1: felt bad.
Speaker 3: And then I thought to.
Speaker 1: Himself, like, what does that do, right, He's seeing it
Speaker 1: and it's not doing the job.
Speaker 2: It's not making the kids stop crying.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's not making the kid.
Speaker 1: It's just actually making the kid feel worse for feeling
Speaker 1: whatever it is that he's feeling. There's somewhere in the middle, Yeah,
Speaker 1: there's somewhere in the middle, you know, it's not you
Speaker 1: don't have to baby them and say like, oh, you know,
Speaker 1: but and you also don't have to shame them.
Speaker 3: You just so I think, I don't.
Speaker 2: I don't.
Speaker 1: I don't believe all the time that tough love, Like
Speaker 1: I don't always think it works, because it made one
Speaker 1: of my kids, you know, not want to play club
Speaker 1: baseball anymore because he was like, I'm not I don't
Speaker 1: like it anymore. Like it's not even fun for me anymore,
Speaker 1: you know.
Speaker 5: So, but that's not tough love.
Speaker 2: Well the coach it.
Speaker 3: Was, you know, like it was like tough you know. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 3: so I don't know.
Speaker 5: I don't. I don't. I don't know his.
Speaker 1: Yeah he does, but not he he didn't he left
Speaker 1: that particularly.
Speaker 5: Yeah, but that was like I saw some of those
Speaker 5: games that was it was I didn't like being there.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it wasn't great.
Speaker 5: Also, the frankfooter at the stand wasn't good.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it was gross. But yeah, but I I I,
Speaker 3: I don't know.
Speaker 1: I feel like there were so many things, more things
Speaker 1: than not that I try to do similar in.
Speaker 2: Raising my kids than not.
Speaker 3: Don't you think what is that face.
Speaker 5: About?
Speaker 4: What I'm just thinking about the different styles of parenting.
Speaker 3: No, you're not.
Speaker 2: You're like thinking about what you're going to have for
Speaker 2: lunch or something.
Speaker 4: I literally was just thinking about what I was going
Speaker 4: to have for lunch. That's incredible.
Speaker 5: I know each other so well.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I was wondering if it's amazing.
Speaker 2: I feel super close to you. I feel very lucky
Speaker 2: that and I feel super close to his wife.
Speaker 4: Yeah, and I'm so grateful for that, and I feel
Speaker 4: grateful for my parents, and I feel grateful for all
Speaker 4: of it.
Speaker 1: And I feel very close to his child, and I
Speaker 1: know how close my kids feel to them. So I
Speaker 1: feel at the end of the day even like with
Speaker 1: all the stuff.
Speaker 5: But stuff, there is nobody in the universe that doesn't
Speaker 5: have a bag of stuff around their necks.
Speaker 3: I agree, And it's literally just and.
Speaker 5: It's how you deal with the stuff. How you you
Speaker 5: you lighten that bag of stuff, how you just put
Speaker 5: your head down and move forward instead of letting the
Speaker 5: stuff weigh you down into a stop.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I still feel like you favored Max though.
Speaker 5: Yeah, but it's not true. Just saying it's not true.
Speaker 5: And I think that you know what I have written down.
Speaker 3: And I think that Max loves it.
Speaker 5: He loves love it.
Speaker 4: I don't love being the favorite. It's the only way
Speaker 4: I've ever known my existence. So it's not that I
Speaker 4: love it. I don't know anything different. I don't know, Prince,
Speaker 4: I don't.
Speaker 3: That's right, the Prince, That is exactly right.
Speaker 4: I don't know what it's like to not be the favorite,
Speaker 4: to be honest with you, and so maybe it's been
Speaker 4: the youngest.
Speaker 2: Maybe it's you think you try to sometimes.
Speaker 3: Did you think that.
Speaker 4: You like never, I would never want to spike the
Speaker 4: football in front of you. It's you're too scary. I
Speaker 4: never like purposely try. Yes, when you were in a
Speaker 4: bad mood. Yes, it was at Laticia's wedding and oh.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, at a broken foot and I was in
Speaker 1: devastating and I was in pain, and I.
Speaker 4: Had Feller knows you had a broken foot.
Speaker 3: I didn't even realize. But I had COVID.
Speaker 4: Well, that explains it. I didn't know that that was this.
Speaker 5: I'm not talking about any rose.
Speaker 4: I'm it was a thing of was a product of COVID.
Speaker 4: Like I know, like people in the world still have COVID,
Speaker 4: and like, don't inflict abuse on everyone in there like way,
Speaker 4: I'm that beautiful. You forget about being wa Hawkan dancing
Speaker 4: and you were just like this where the Wahawkan dancers
Speaker 4: were going your signess.
Speaker 3: I was not. I loved the wedding. You annoy me
Speaker 3: sometimes and.
Speaker 1: Literally you were like breathing and you were just being
Speaker 1: a jerk, and you didn't check on me, check on
Speaker 1: I want to.
Speaker 4: I want to use this podcast as an opportunity to
Speaker 4: tell you I'm so sorry that I breathed, and I'm
Speaker 4: so sorry that when you are in such a heinous,
Speaker 4: terrifying mood that you are completely unapproachable that I find
Speaker 4: the best thing to do is just give you space.
Speaker 5: No, no, but you haven't.
Speaker 2: All you had to do was like come up and
Speaker 2: ask me if I was okay?
Speaker 5: Really, nobody, that's not fair.
Speaker 3: I was going through a hard time and I was
Speaker 3: very clear.
Speaker 4: But I didn't find out about it until a week later.
Speaker 4: So the whole time my wife and I thinking what
Speaker 4: did we do? Why she mad at us? And then
Speaker 4: a week later you do.
Speaker 3: Have all the time, and I'm exhausted by them.
Speaker 4: And I'm like, okay, great, that makes sense. How can
Speaker 4: I be helpful?
Speaker 2: Okay? Well, sometimes it takes me a minute.
Speaker 4: So you were amazing. When you are in like a
Speaker 4: sort of as we used to say with Hamlet or
Speaker 4: red zone, you are unapproachable.
Speaker 1: Now you're comparing me to the dog that no, no,
Speaker 1: no bites people.
Speaker 5: Perhaps you bit people. The dog is no longer with it.
Speaker 3: I thank god I was happy when the dog.
Speaker 5: I have to say I was not a fan.
Speaker 4: Yeah, because you're a bitch.
Speaker 5: And no, that is not true. How long did you
Speaker 5: leave that dog?
Speaker 4: In greatest gift you've ever given said, he left the
Speaker 4: dog here, Like the greatest gift you've ever given me.
Speaker 4: I didn't leave it here.
Speaker 5: You left him.
Speaker 1: You left him here if it wasn't safe enough for
Speaker 1: you and your child to be around, why would it
Speaker 1: be safe enough for a seventy.
Speaker 4: Never care. It's the greatest gift you've ever given me.
Speaker 2: Is okay for a seventy nine year rated man, and
Speaker 2: it stopped.
Speaker 4: The greatest gift you've ever given me in my life
Speaker 4: was taking care of Hamlet, and I did take good
Speaker 4: care for in my life. The greatest gift you ever
Speaker 4: gave me was taking care of that dog for three
Speaker 4: years of my daughter's life. And the greatest gift that
Speaker 4: dog ever gave me, besides eternal friendship and love, was
Speaker 4: never going after my daughter. And he knew he did
Speaker 4: a saint.
Speaker 3: My brother in law to the point where he had
Speaker 3: to go to the hospital.
Speaker 4: Arthur asked for it, but to be fair, he handled
Speaker 4: himself incredibly good. He never told a soul, he never snitched,
Speaker 4: and for that, Arthur has my undying protection.
Speaker 3: I want to explain something to you.
Speaker 1: If that dog, if it was someone else, like someone
Speaker 1: that worked at the event that I was having, or
Speaker 1: something a dad could have been sued for like millions of.
Speaker 4: Dollars, wasn't.
Speaker 5: But it was Arthur.
Speaker 4: And I'm glad it was Arthur because he handled himself
Speaker 4: incredibly well. And Arthur will forever be taken care of.
Speaker 4: Arthur handled himself like a mensch.
Speaker 2: That day he bit your wife, he bit Schmid.
Speaker 4: He they were all asking for it.
Speaker 5: Oh my god.
Speaker 4: You don't walk around a dog when he's eating. You
Speaker 4: don't enter a room.
Speaker 3: I have dogs, and I know what my.
Speaker 4: Dogs, zeros in the world would be A better dog
Speaker 4: was insane. He had had trauma, had trauma.
Speaker 1: And unless you're going to care for the dog, then
Speaker 1: there's I don't want to talk about the dog anymore.
Speaker 1: It's taking time and it's boring.
Speaker 3: No one cares.
Speaker 4: But I will never I will never get mad at
Speaker 4: you because of what you've done for him. Thank you,
Speaker 4: Thank you.
Speaker 5: I love you. I love you too.
Speaker 3: You don't get mad?
Speaker 5: Why would you be mad?
Speaker 4: Never? Because he took care of him.
Speaker 5: What did I do that?
Speaker 4: Nothing? I'm just saying it will always mean if I did,
Speaker 4: it is the greatest gift anyone has ever given me.
Speaker 3: I'll still get mad at you.
Speaker 5: Yeah, but you haven't in the longest time. But when
Speaker 5: you did get mad at me, I stood right there
Speaker 5: in the kitchen on the phone, and I swear to God,
Speaker 5: the entire mechanism meltics.
Speaker 4: One's very scared when you get mad.
Speaker 3: First of all, I want to say something.
Speaker 1: The other day, you were a little bit spicy with me,
Speaker 1: was yep, And usually like that, you were just like
Speaker 1: you were snippy and usually and I'm a human being, right,
Speaker 1: but usually for me as a very for me, as
Speaker 1: a very emotional person, I would get snippy back. And
Speaker 1: I didn't, and you apologized and we moved on. And
Speaker 1: it wasn't it could that could have been?
Speaker 5: That could have been again.
Speaker 4: You both have anger problems.
Speaker 2: What are you talking?
Speaker 5: You know what? I might have talk about it. I
Speaker 5: do get angry, but not often. When I do, it's explosive.
Speaker 3: Have you ever gotten mad at you ever? In your
Speaker 3: entire but.
Speaker 4: When he gets angry at you, it's very scary.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's exactly right. You've never gotten mad at him ever?
Speaker 4: Yeah, you did. When Schmid and I stayed out past
Speaker 4: curfew and Hawaii, you really were scary.
Speaker 5: And when we sat on the on the on the
Speaker 5: soccer trip, no, or on a on a soccer.
Speaker 4: It wasn't wasn't soccer. No, it wasn't soccer. Wasn't soccer.
Speaker 4: When you've been mad at Zoe before, uh, and you've
Speaker 4: used the F word, it's been scary.
Speaker 3: But I I yeah, I would say you are a
Speaker 3: great dad.
Speaker 4: And I think you have incredible work ethic, and.
Speaker 3: You like maybe that's where you get your work ethic.
Speaker 4: I know it is.
Speaker 1: That was one of the things I said about him
Speaker 1: that I really admire. I missed that, but he got that.
Speaker 5: Wait a minute, let's back up a little bit. First
Speaker 5: of all, Max at Ten said I want to be
Speaker 5: a director. He kept his word. In January I don't
Speaker 5: want he hired me.
Speaker 1: He doesn't want does he specifically said he doesn't want
Speaker 1: to talk about it?
Speaker 5: Okay, fine, that's number one.
Speaker 4: Tell the media.
Speaker 5: Okay, I'm going to I will tell anybody that listens.
Speaker 5: But you miss you, miss you? Are you?
Speaker 4: Let's not call it work ethics. I'm just kidding you.
Speaker 5: I'm over here. That's what I'm bringing up over here.
Speaker 5: Missus is over here. I went to her class. Did
Speaker 5: you go to off of me?
Speaker 3: I need him off of me?
Speaker 5: Yeah, no, he's just being call it what it is.
Speaker 4: Let's get off the script and talk.
Speaker 2: I'm not okay.
Speaker 4: This is what we love though, this is why we too.
Speaker 5: So what you do is you don't take it personally.
Speaker 5: You just let him. He's a tornado of nothing over there.
Speaker 4: That's all the does that.
Speaker 5: I'll tell you what it means. You have no idea
Speaker 5: what you're saying. Can I finishe You're sitting on your couch,
Speaker 5: you see a news program that is true, you decide
Speaker 5: I have to do something about it. You created. This
Speaker 5: is about humanity. You've raised four million dollars. No money
Speaker 5: goes to anything but the children need. I would say
Speaker 5: that's a work ethic.
Speaker 3: No, absolutely.
Speaker 5: I I don't say you didn't get it.
Speaker 3: I know that I did, and I have a great
Speaker 3: work ethic.
Speaker 4: Here's what I'll say, you do have work ethic.
Speaker 3: Okay.
Speaker 1: I feel like we both got a lot of amazing
Speaker 1: qualities from our parents, and we've.
Speaker 4: Also gotten some from mom.
Speaker 2: Mom, you're generous too.
Speaker 1: She's very thoughtful about so are you. But she's very
Speaker 1: thoughtful about like if someone says something that they like,
Speaker 1: or if some.
Speaker 2: She's she's she listens to.
Speaker 3: She can listen to.
Speaker 1: Like many things at once, and so she always and
Speaker 1: she can remember.
Speaker 2: She'll remember like great host, great, great host, great.
Speaker 3: And she'll remember details about people.
Speaker 5: And then But I'm interested, what is the difference in
Speaker 5: in generosity between you.
Speaker 4: And It hurts it hurts you more to spend money.
Speaker 4: Say it again, it hurts you more to spend money.
Speaker 5: It hurts it hurts me to waste the amount of money.
Speaker 4: It's wastefully generous, but it means a lot to people.
Speaker 4: You are, We're the hardest worker you try.
Speaker 2: I think you're extremely generous.
Speaker 4: You are generous, You're incredible.
Speaker 1: Extremely and it's just like in every way, like even
Speaker 1: the way that you bill hater talks about it all
Speaker 1: the time and went that the bunt cake and that
Speaker 1: you always like you're always treating the crew to every
Speaker 1: I mean, you're.
Speaker 4: Just a generous in a more hurt She's incredible. You're thoughtful,
Speaker 4: but she's thoughtful in a way that she remembers something
Speaker 4: and then follows up on it. You're thoughtful in the moment.
Speaker 3: You guys are both very thoughtful people.
Speaker 5: It's not a competition, no, I know, I just I
Speaker 5: was merely interested in the difference.
Speaker 4: Like you're great. You did great, Like you've got a
Speaker 4: wonderful legacy.
Speaker 5: Thank you, you made me feel great.
Speaker 4: Celebrate you. Thank you like you did it, like you.
Speaker 5: Know what, one of the great walks that I remember
Speaker 5: in my whole life. Your first movie came out. It
Speaker 5: was small, the company did not have a lot of
Speaker 5: money to support it.
Speaker 3: What was that movie called?
Speaker 5: I don't know. It was Ceremony?
Speaker 2: Who was it? I'm just kidding, I know what it is.
Speaker 5: I'm just being abded, Okay.
Speaker 4: But anyway, Yes, I said I wanted to retire.
Speaker 5: You said I made every decision. Dad, How does this happen?
Speaker 5: I picked every song with care. I'm never going to
Speaker 5: do this again, and I said, you will, this too
Speaker 5: will pass. But you were so open it I'll never
Speaker 5: forget it as long as I live. That that moment
Speaker 5: in time and then.
Speaker 3: He was close shut for the rest of his life.
Speaker 3: After that.
Speaker 4: Well, it was a horrible loss for me. But it
Speaker 4: wasn't good enough.
Speaker 5: Do you know what? Can I just say one thing
Speaker 5: before we stop?
Speaker 3: Would you say, I'm not like a very I'm not saying.
Speaker 5: He's not annoying at all. He is not an annoying person.
Speaker 1: It's not like a very demonstrative person except for my kids.
Speaker 3: I'm not right.
Speaker 4: You're absolutely not. And here's why. Get over here. Get
Speaker 4: over here, my sister, You're absolutely not.
Speaker 3: I don't are you joking? Do you need some water?
Speaker 5: I'm better now. In between coughs, I've got to say
Speaker 5: a sentence. I cannot believe that this actually happened, That
Speaker 5: we are no matter how it turns out, that we
Speaker 5: are together.
Speaker 1: Thank you so much for joining us for another episode
Speaker 1: of What.
Speaker 3: In the Winkler.
Speaker 1: Please tell a friend You can follow us at What
Speaker 1: in the Winkler Pod.
Speaker 3: On Instagram, TikTok and leave us.
Speaker 4: Are you doing