WEBVTT - Where Are We on Kidnapping? With Sean Hayes 0:00:00.800 --> 0:00:04.560 Hi, Catherine, it's to be Chelsea. Hi, Chelsea's me Catherine. 0:00:04.640 --> 0:00:06.520 Oh Hi, It's so nice to be in the l 0:00:06.600 --> 0:00:10.080 A studio again. Look at us here. I know, I know, 0:00:10.119 --> 0:00:13.560 and yet we're still zooming from other rooms today. I know, 0:00:13.720 --> 0:00:16.160 but doesn't it feel nice to have the nice fall weather. 0:00:16.320 --> 0:00:20.240 I came back and I'm like, finally it's season. It's season, 0:00:20.320 --> 0:00:23.439 a new season. I know. I put my heat on 0:00:23.520 --> 0:00:27.520 in my house. Yes, I just had my heater replaced 0:00:27.560 --> 0:00:30.680 in my bathroom in my apartment, and I like literally 0:00:30.800 --> 0:00:33.479 thinked it out loud today. I was like, thank you 0:00:33.520 --> 0:00:38.040 for existing. It's just so warm and cozy. Oh yeah, 0:00:38.120 --> 0:00:40.400 nice and cozy. That's right. I got a coat. I 0:00:40.440 --> 0:00:43.600 got a new coat. In New York. Joe bought me 0:00:43.640 --> 0:00:45.680 a new coat and winter coat because we were there 0:00:45.680 --> 0:00:48.200 and we were not prepared. Joe goes shopping in every 0:00:48.200 --> 0:00:50.599 city we go to. He just he starts It's like 0:00:50.760 --> 0:00:53.480 basically he starts out with nothing and then just acquires 0:00:53.520 --> 0:00:56.760 clothing while we're there. So every day is a shopping bananza. 0:00:56.960 --> 0:00:59.160 I love that he loves the shopping, you don't I know. 0:00:59.520 --> 0:01:01.400 I'm like, we can't go to product I go I 0:01:01.440 --> 0:01:03.920 cannot go to product again. I just can't deal with it. 0:01:04.400 --> 0:01:06.720 He's like, come on, I mean every couple has that issue, 0:01:06.840 --> 0:01:12.080 right right exactly. It's like totally the reverse. I love it. 0:01:12.080 --> 0:01:14.400 It's like I'm the male and he's the female. But 0:01:14.480 --> 0:01:17.160 he's fine with that and I actually it works and 0:01:17.200 --> 0:01:19.400 you wind up with having the things you need and 0:01:19.480 --> 0:01:23.240 maybe some product. Yeah, it's some extra things that I need. Yeah, well, 0:01:23.280 --> 0:01:25.759 other people starving in the world. We have as much 0:01:25.800 --> 0:01:29.000 ship as we need. Well, Chelsea, I have an update 0:01:29.040 --> 0:01:32.920 from one of our previous colors. This is from E. 0:01:33.560 --> 0:01:37.600 She is the gal that we talked to whose boyfriend 0:01:37.840 --> 0:01:41.440 was occasionally drinking and he would say nasty things to her. 0:01:42.040 --> 0:01:44.920 Remember this is why I don't want to be with you. Yeah, 0:01:44.959 --> 0:01:47.960 so she says, Oh my gosh, I just heard my 0:01:48.040 --> 0:01:50.960 email response in the episode. Thanks so much for the 0:01:51.000 --> 0:01:53.880 helpful advice. I wanted to update all of you and 0:01:53.920 --> 0:01:55.960 tell you that I gave him one more chance and 0:01:56.040 --> 0:01:58.520 he sucked up. So I broke up with him. And 0:01:58.680 --> 0:02:03.360 guess what. Yeah, since then, my career has skyrocketed, and 0:02:03.520 --> 0:02:06.120 so many other things in my life are coming together now. 0:02:06.320 --> 0:02:08.880 It's crazy what happens when you respect yourself enough to 0:02:09.000 --> 0:02:12.720 know when someone isn't giving you what you deserve. Chelsea, 0:02:12.800 --> 0:02:15.200 I bought tickets to your Vancouver tour and I'm so 0:02:15.280 --> 0:02:17.880 excited to see you live. I love you and thank 0:02:17.880 --> 0:02:21.880 you again. E. Oh my god, how fucking awesome is that? 0:02:22.360 --> 0:02:26.280 It's just delightful. I love taking their power, you know 0:02:26.280 --> 0:02:29.720 what I mean? Like I love saying you don't fucking settle. 0:02:29.880 --> 0:02:32.600 Do not settle for ship. We don't have to settle. 0:02:32.639 --> 0:02:35.880 When you settle, then you're not creating a higher standard 0:02:35.919 --> 0:02:38.120 for yourself. And we always want the best of what 0:02:38.200 --> 0:02:41.000 we deserve, and we deserve the best. Every single one 0:02:41.000 --> 0:02:43.880 of us deserves the best. So good for you, E. 0:02:44.240 --> 0:02:46.880 I love it. And it sounds like she just like 0:02:47.040 --> 0:02:50.080 unblocked some energy, like something that was not so great 0:02:50.080 --> 0:02:51.880 in her life, and all of a sudden, this flood 0:02:51.880 --> 0:02:55.160 of wonderful things came to her. Yeah, right, exactly. And 0:02:55.200 --> 0:02:57.320 we should never be caretakers in our lives, you know 0:02:57.320 --> 0:02:59.680 what I mean. Not for romantic partners, unless you know, 0:02:59.720 --> 0:03:02.480 something terrible happens, and that's a different set of circumstances. 0:03:02.520 --> 0:03:05.160 But when somebody has a drinking problem that they can't control, 0:03:05.200 --> 0:03:08.160 that is not your problem right exactly. And you know, 0:03:08.200 --> 0:03:09.680 I mean we talked a little bit about this on 0:03:09.680 --> 0:03:11.320 the episode, but it is a little bit of that 0:03:11.360 --> 0:03:13.800 in vino veritas, Like if somebody is saying something to 0:03:13.840 --> 0:03:16.160 you when they're in an altered state that like it 0:03:16.240 --> 0:03:18.640 might be what they really feel, that they really they're 0:03:18.680 --> 0:03:20.480 really not into it. And guess what, you don't have 0:03:20.560 --> 0:03:22.200 to be into them either. What is it? What is 0:03:22.240 --> 0:03:29.120 the phrase you used in vito vitiation veritas, in vino veritas, 0:03:29.200 --> 0:03:32.000 which is in wine? There is truth or something to that? 0:03:33.200 --> 0:03:36.880 How you say what you really mean when you're you know, 0:03:36.960 --> 0:03:39.560 half in the bag. Okay, I got it, and so 0:03:39.920 --> 0:03:42.720 she is doing great. Um, I was excited to tell 0:03:42.720 --> 0:03:44.760 you about that. Well. I love updates. Please if you've 0:03:44.800 --> 0:03:47.280 called in before, please I we love to hear updates, 0:03:47.360 --> 0:03:50.400 especially positive ones, and even if they're not great, then 0:03:50.480 --> 0:03:53.320 I would like to hear that feedback too. Also, when 0:03:53.320 --> 0:03:55.320 you want to write into the show, it's Dear Chelsea 0:03:55.360 --> 0:03:58.280 project at Gmail. So make sure you are writing into 0:03:58.280 --> 0:04:01.080 the show because we get all kinds submission. So I 0:04:01.160 --> 0:04:03.760 don't think that your problem isn't worthy of being talked 0:04:03.760 --> 0:04:06.400 about or it's not appropriate, like we'll find a way 0:04:06.440 --> 0:04:08.760 to talk about it based on who our guests are, 0:04:08.800 --> 0:04:11.360 and we kind of curate the shows for you know, 0:04:11.600 --> 0:04:14.280 the topics for the guests we have on, so you 0:04:14.320 --> 0:04:18.320 never know when your topic will be relevant exactly. So 0:04:18.400 --> 0:04:24.159 we have a really exciting guest today. Yeah. He yes, 0:04:24.400 --> 0:04:28.400 he has a couple of podcasts actually currently going. Everybody 0:04:28.400 --> 0:04:32.000 knows him from Willing Grace and he is on the 0:04:32.080 --> 0:04:36.320 smash success podcast called SmartLess with Jason and Will Arnett. 0:04:36.800 --> 0:04:38.599 Jason's last name is our net Too because he and 0:04:38.640 --> 0:04:41.400 Will are married, and he also has his own podcast 0:04:41.440 --> 0:04:46.640 called Hypochondria Actor Hypochondria Actor hypochondract Or. He'll tell us 0:04:46.680 --> 0:04:50.720 when you get Hypochondriactor Hypochondriactor, which I've been a guest 0:04:50.720 --> 0:04:52.039 on smart List and I will be a guest on 0:04:52.080 --> 0:04:56.920 Hypochondriactor as well. So please give your attention to one 0:04:56.960 --> 0:05:00.720 of my funniest friends, Sean Hayes. So I saw your 0:05:00.720 --> 0:05:03.159 friend dead missing at my show at the Beacond. She 0:05:03.200 --> 0:05:05.120 came to my show at the Beacond. I love her. Yeah, 0:05:05.279 --> 0:05:07.960 she was cute. She's cute. Can we touch? Of course. 0:05:08.000 --> 0:05:09.680 I want you to slide in here, come as close 0:05:09.680 --> 0:05:11.840 as you want. I just want to be able to 0:05:11.839 --> 0:05:18.480 feel this little baby right there. Attention today. Why are 0:05:18.480 --> 0:05:21.960 you so tired? Honey? Mr Muscles feel nice? Thanks? I 0:05:22.040 --> 0:05:25.400 got up like, yeah, I got up at five today. 0:05:25.600 --> 0:05:28.600 I don't know, so did I I drank too much 0:05:28.640 --> 0:05:31.360 this weekend? I think me too. And I got up 0:05:31.360 --> 0:05:34.120 at five. I got up at five and today, yeah, 0:05:34.200 --> 0:05:35.839 this morning I got up at five and I said 0:05:35.839 --> 0:05:38.400 to Joe Koy. He goes, are you getting up? And 0:05:38.440 --> 0:05:40.359 I go, yeah, I think I'm going to get up, 0:05:40.400 --> 0:05:41.680 and he goes, I'll get up with you. And I go, 0:05:41.800 --> 0:05:43.599 all right, I'm going to get on the peloton. He's like, 0:05:43.600 --> 0:05:45.680 I'll get on the treadmill. Then we did that. I go, 0:05:45.760 --> 0:05:48.200 I'm going to my trainers at seven five and he goes, 0:05:48.240 --> 0:05:49.880 I'll do that with you too, and I go, this 0:05:49.920 --> 0:05:52.240 is fucking awesome. I go, you just do whatever I do. 0:05:52.360 --> 0:05:54.680 I love it for two years and then you're like, 0:05:55.839 --> 0:06:00.000 we need to get my boyfriend and you just start dating. 0:06:00.000 --> 0:06:03.320 That's when I'll started dating women, because that's going to 0:06:03.400 --> 0:06:06.839 happen at some point. You mean it hasn't well, I mean, 0:06:06.920 --> 0:06:09.760 you know, just for a night or two, nothing serious. 0:06:10.680 --> 0:06:13.520 Are you enjoying your podcasts that you're doing SmartLess. You 0:06:13.560 --> 0:06:16.520 sound like you Yeah. Yeah, Oh my god, I laugh 0:06:17.000 --> 0:06:21.120 so hard. It's so fucking funny this one. Yeah, this 0:06:21.240 --> 0:06:27.520 is well news flash, you're funny. Hey, how about how 0:06:27.520 --> 0:06:30.080 about thirty minutes we talk, thirty minutes we nap, and 0:06:30.080 --> 0:06:31.760 then we wrap it up. Yeah, don't worry, it's going 0:06:31.800 --> 0:06:34.120 to be like that. We go an hour and that's 0:06:34.120 --> 0:06:36.240 our limit, so don't worry about going over. You know 0:06:36.240 --> 0:06:39.880 what's so funny is podcasts that go for two hours, 0:06:39.880 --> 0:06:42.479 like taxes. Yeah, Dox thought he was going to be 0:06:42.520 --> 0:06:44.160 here for two hours too. I had to cut him off. 0:06:44.200 --> 0:06:48.360 I was like, nobody, nobody, nobody's going for that long, 0:06:48.600 --> 0:06:51.200 by the way, for me to for me to catch 0:06:51.960 --> 0:06:54.360 for me to catch up with a podcast in my car, 0:06:54.640 --> 0:06:57.960 I have like a twenty minute I don't have time 0:06:58.000 --> 0:07:00.480 to listen to a two hour fucking interview. When people 0:07:00.520 --> 0:07:02.159 like did you listen to so and so on Stern, 0:07:02.200 --> 0:07:05.160 I'm like, or Mick Jagger was just on Stern. I tried, well, 0:07:05.200 --> 0:07:07.880 that was because he's also you know, like, well he's 0:07:07.880 --> 0:07:10.400 experiencing dementia or something, because he couldn't get his thoughts 0:07:10.440 --> 0:07:13.640 like yeah, I think he's all he's like eighty, but 0:07:13.800 --> 0:07:16.400 I was like, I cannot listen to this for two hours. 0:07:16.480 --> 0:07:18.920 It's too fuacking long. Yeah. Well, and you know I 0:07:18.920 --> 0:07:22.240 don't have Rolling Stones on my playlist. Okay, so any 0:07:22.280 --> 0:07:24.560 you have add but mostly did you hear the new one? 0:07:25.080 --> 0:07:28.080 It's fantastic. My friend today goes by the name of 0:07:28.120 --> 0:07:35.360 Sean Hayes. He he he is an actor extraordinaire. He 0:07:35.520 --> 0:07:38.760 is a flaming homosexual. Are we allowed to say that anymore? 0:07:39.160 --> 0:07:43.400 I doubt it? But he's also well, he's so talented, 0:07:43.640 --> 0:07:47.240 so fucking talented. Remember, well, we've talked about this so 0:07:47.240 --> 0:07:49.120 many times, so maybe we don't need to revisit it, 0:07:49.160 --> 0:07:52.200 but remember how talented you were on the set of 0:07:52.200 --> 0:07:55.440 Will and Grace and how what a basket case I was. 0:07:55.800 --> 0:07:59.040 The only part I don't like about rehashing this with 0:07:59.120 --> 0:08:01.640 you is you pretend that I wasn't. No, I'm agreeing 0:08:01.640 --> 0:08:03.880 with you. You're a basket case. Okay, thank you. But 0:08:03.880 --> 0:08:05.880 but what I'm saying is it's hard to come in 0:08:06.040 --> 0:08:08.480 any set that's been like around that long, because you're 0:08:08.800 --> 0:08:11.520 you're coming into the quote unquote house or the home 0:08:11.720 --> 0:08:14.360 of these people who have relationships ready, so you're trying 0:08:14.360 --> 0:08:17.160 to figure out your place in a week. But that's 0:08:17.160 --> 0:08:19.160 not what That's not what that was about. But I 0:08:19.200 --> 0:08:21.680 was going through something and that was the difference through. 0:08:22.520 --> 0:08:24.960 Yeah I'm through okay, Yeah, yeah through it. If that 0:08:25.080 --> 0:08:28.280 was still going on, I'd probably be fucking dead. How 0:08:28.320 --> 0:08:31.280 are you? I'm great? Yeah? Many of these do you 0:08:31.320 --> 0:08:33.559 do a day? This is my second one today, but 0:08:33.640 --> 0:08:36.160 yeah I usually do too. Maybe three a day? Is 0:08:36.200 --> 0:08:38.400 that hard for you to keep it up? Two is 0:08:38.440 --> 0:08:40.640 not hard? Three gets a little bit tricky. And then 0:08:40.640 --> 0:08:44.960 what do you do? Kind of check out? Well somebody talking? Yeah, no, 0:08:45.120 --> 0:08:47.920 I'm not like that. Usually I can pretty much focus, 0:08:48.600 --> 0:08:51.480 but yeah, that couldn't happen on the third hour. I'm 0:08:51.559 --> 0:08:54.320 much better at focusing now than I used to be. 0:08:54.320 --> 0:08:56.240 Like when I did my talk show, if somebody was 0:08:56.280 --> 0:08:58.920 fucking boring, I would literally just be thinking about lunch. 0:08:59.160 --> 0:09:01.640 Really yeah, like what did you? How did you? Wasn't 0:09:01.679 --> 0:09:04.040 it scary to kind of like have your mind wander 0:09:04.240 --> 0:09:06.920 and how would get because I and my mind wandering 0:09:06.960 --> 0:09:09.160 was better for the show than me listening to their dribble. 0:09:12.360 --> 0:09:16.320 It's so funny. So many talk shows have I and 0:09:16.440 --> 0:09:18.360 you think I've only had two. Oh, I feel like 0:09:18.360 --> 0:09:21.520 you've had more. I've had two, but they've I've done 0:09:21.520 --> 0:09:25.480 them both for Chelsea Lately, Chelsea and everything else was 0:09:25.559 --> 0:09:30.319 documentaries and then after Late like other shows, nothing talk show. Well, 0:09:30.320 --> 0:09:31.920 you're so good at it. Why did you never want 0:09:31.960 --> 0:09:34.040 to do like a daytime or a nighttime I know 0:09:34.160 --> 0:09:36.800 Chelsea Lately was a nighttime thing and Chelsea and Chelsea 0:09:36.920 --> 0:09:40.199 was streaming, but didn't you want to do something mainstreaming? 0:09:41.360 --> 0:09:42.720 All right? I don't want to be told what to 0:09:42.720 --> 0:09:44.760 do by a bunch of old white guys, all right. 0:09:44.920 --> 0:09:47.079 I'd like to tell them like, this is how it's 0:09:47.080 --> 0:09:49.640 going to be in blah blah blah. And by the way, Sean, 0:09:49.720 --> 0:09:52.360 this is not an interview show where you interview me. 0:09:52.800 --> 0:09:55.880 This is an interne show where we talk about your 0:09:55.880 --> 0:09:58.720 sex life. For the first thirty minutes, that's about You 0:09:58.720 --> 0:10:00.760 don't need that long. I want to tell well, I 0:10:00.800 --> 0:10:06.520 know that. Yeah, he's not lying everybody. His lover partner, lifesaver, 0:10:06.760 --> 0:10:13.720 actually husband, husband extraordinaire. His name is Scottie, and he's 0:10:13.760 --> 0:10:18.400 exactly how you'd picture him, adorable. And Sean is about 0:10:18.440 --> 0:10:22.000 as useful as an ashtray on a motorcycle when it 0:10:22.640 --> 0:10:26.719 comes when it comes to domesticity, I mean you are 0:10:26.800 --> 0:10:30.560 worse than I because I've been there. Well, you didn't 0:10:30.600 --> 0:10:32.560 learn it from me, because we just met as adult, 0:10:32.640 --> 0:10:34.240 so I don't know where the funk you learned it. 0:10:34.559 --> 0:10:37.040 But you come from a big family with a lot 0:10:37.080 --> 0:10:39.439 of kids where you had to fucking or in your 0:10:39.559 --> 0:10:41.560 keep in a different way. I don't understand why you 0:10:41.559 --> 0:10:45.640 can't do anything, but I remember reading I remember you 0:10:45.720 --> 0:10:49.080 telling me and also reading about you saying I don't 0:10:49.080 --> 0:10:50.560 know how to turn the TV on. I don't know 0:10:50.600 --> 0:10:53.160 how any text things work. I got this house thing like, 0:10:53.160 --> 0:10:54.400 I don't know if a door bricks, I don't know how. 0:10:54.400 --> 0:10:57.240 Then you know knob works. And I'm exactly the same 0:10:57.280 --> 0:10:59.520 way if I get a Google doc, if I see 0:10:59.600 --> 0:11:01.760 something in an email and it says google doc, I 0:11:01.840 --> 0:11:05.720 shut my computer down because I'm so scared that I 0:11:05.760 --> 0:11:07.760 will get in I will get in there and I 0:11:07.760 --> 0:11:11.560 will delete another person's work or something untoward will happen, 0:11:11.800 --> 0:11:14.400 and I just I'm like, fuck. If I get a 0:11:14.520 --> 0:11:17.120 drop box and just give my phone to my assistant, 0:11:17.160 --> 0:11:18.880 and I'm like, what is this? I know I can't 0:11:19.040 --> 0:11:21.040 but it's such an indicator of our age now that 0:11:21.120 --> 0:11:23.199 I want to fight against it. You know, only when 0:11:23.200 --> 0:11:25.520 you got your internet, like your first like I was 0:11:25.559 --> 0:11:28.400 living in l A. I think I was at first Internet. Yeah, 0:11:30.160 --> 0:11:32.120 like email address and all that. Well that by the way, 0:11:32.160 --> 0:11:33.800 I have the same email address I did when I 0:11:33.840 --> 0:11:37.560 was nineteen years old. No, yeah, I still pay month. 0:11:40.520 --> 0:11:43.120 You and me are the last two people that say, well, agree, 0:11:45.760 --> 0:11:49.400 we're so lazy. It's so lazy. First of all, I 0:11:49.480 --> 0:11:51.320 would love to cut off all the people that have 0:11:51.400 --> 0:11:53.320 that address, you know what I mean, Like there's so 0:11:53.400 --> 0:11:56.160 much motivation to change, and it feels like that's the 0:11:56.200 --> 0:11:57.839 easiest one to hack. What are they going to hack 0:11:57.920 --> 0:12:01.520 for me? I'm already like like drop boxes and Gmail. 0:12:01.640 --> 0:12:07.559 Well yes, but there's match nothing interesting attachment. Anytimever seen attachment, 0:12:07.559 --> 0:12:11.000 I just delete that. You know. It's like a contract 0:12:11.040 --> 0:12:13.280 is super important country, like I never got it. How's 0:12:13.280 --> 0:12:15.920 it going? How it's like these questions are amazing. It's 0:12:15.960 --> 0:12:19.280 going great. Yeah, yeah, Sean is a fucking asshole, by 0:12:19.320 --> 0:12:22.400 the way, So just prepare yourself for that ship. I 0:12:22.520 --> 0:12:24.720 don't know. How's it going. It's going great, busier than ever. 0:12:24.920 --> 0:12:27.280 You know, you figured it, you know, during during the 0:12:27.440 --> 0:12:31.480 during the my god, I almost said something horrible during 0:12:43.120 --> 0:12:49.199 We've lost them, It's over, It's over. During the pandemic, 0:12:52.240 --> 0:12:54.840 for some people, it was like a holidays. That's why 0:12:54.880 --> 0:13:00.000 I probably thought of that during the pandemic. During the pandemic, 0:13:00.080 --> 0:13:03.000 you know, like everybody we pivoted because that's a real 0:13:03.040 --> 0:13:16.960 popular word. You were you triggered by the Holocaust? No, 0:13:17.160 --> 0:13:19.880 I was. I wasn't triggered by the panic, as you know. 0:13:20.000 --> 0:13:22.120 I do smart List with Jason Bateman and we'll learn 0:13:22.200 --> 0:13:24.160 that and we're literally just like, hey, let's do a 0:13:24.200 --> 0:13:27.720 podcast literally just to hang out because nobody could go anywhere. 0:13:27.760 --> 0:13:30.000 So we set it up on zoom and we just 0:13:30.280 --> 0:13:32.120 did it for like we're gonna let's just do like 0:13:32.160 --> 0:13:33.840 five of these and be done. And here we are, 0:13:34.120 --> 0:13:38.200 Oh my god, really super fun. And then I do Hypochondriactor, 0:13:38.280 --> 0:13:40.120 which you're gonna come on because I'm an actor who's 0:13:40.200 --> 0:13:43.560 hypochondract is you know, And um, I can show this 0:13:43.640 --> 0:13:45.400 on the thing, right, So I got my Now I 0:13:45.480 --> 0:13:48.840 got a foot boot because he has his toe hurts, 0:13:49.080 --> 0:13:52.880 so he's wearing a foot boots. Yeah. It's pretty dramatic 0:13:53.080 --> 0:13:55.679 and it falls right in line with being a hypocontract, 0:13:55.880 --> 0:14:02.679 hypochontract actor, hypochontrac actor, hypochondria actor, hypochondria actor. Right, Okay, 0:14:03.280 --> 0:14:05.520 I didn't really, I didn't realize you and Will and 0:14:05.600 --> 0:14:08.840 Jason were such good friends for a long, long, long, 0:14:08.880 --> 0:14:11.560 long time. Yet those guys are so funny. Oh my god, 0:14:11.840 --> 0:14:14.559 they make me laugh so hard. Yeah. Yeah, So that's 0:14:14.600 --> 0:14:16.200 how I've been That's what I've been doing. I'm also 0:14:16.280 --> 0:14:20.000 doing a play called Goodnight Oscar, where I play Oscar Event, 0:14:20.040 --> 0:14:22.120 who is George Gershwin's best friend. And the story is 0:14:22.280 --> 0:14:25.720 very kind of Saliary Mozart, a very contentious, you know, 0:14:25.840 --> 0:14:30.120 love hate relationship between Oscar and Georgie's music and h 0:14:30.240 --> 0:14:33.160 but it also takes the whole play takes place backstage 0:14:33.200 --> 0:14:36.080 of The Tonight Show when Jack Parr hosted, and Oscar 0:14:36.160 --> 0:14:39.360 Event is very famous for talking about mental health publicly 0:14:39.400 --> 0:14:41.680 before anybody else did in the fifties, and it was 0:14:41.720 --> 0:14:44.120 super shocking to hear it back then, and he ended 0:14:44.200 --> 0:14:47.000 up in mental institutions and he was addicted to prescription drugs. 0:14:47.160 --> 0:14:50.080 He used to say things like he's super super, super 0:14:50.080 --> 0:14:53.600 witty and funny. Anyway, so I'm doing that and where 0:14:53.720 --> 0:14:55.520 where can we see that play that's at the Goodman 0:14:55.640 --> 0:14:59.280 Theater in Chicago. That's your hometown, hometown. We open there 0:14:59.280 --> 0:15:01.040 and then I think we're going to Broadway after that. 0:15:01.280 --> 0:15:03.480 Oh how exciting and smart Liss is on the road 0:15:03.520 --> 0:15:06.800 because I was just in Boston performing at the Fillmore 0:15:06.800 --> 0:15:09.400 and I saw that Smartness was at the way. I think, right, 0:15:09.440 --> 0:15:11.080 you guys, I don't even I mean I have to. 0:15:11.160 --> 0:15:13.640 I don't memorize the two Are you going or did 0:15:13.640 --> 0:15:15.600 you go already? No? No, it's it's the first two 0:15:15.600 --> 0:15:18.440 weeks of February. Oh how exciting is that to do that? 0:15:18.840 --> 0:15:20.520 And then I do the first two weeks on tour 0:15:20.640 --> 0:15:22.480 of Smartness in February. Then I go do the play 0:15:22.520 --> 0:15:25.800 for probably six months, and then I have this other 0:15:25.960 --> 0:15:29.320 big project that if it goes, I'll go right into that. Okay, 0:15:29.320 --> 0:15:33.200 And is that a transition that is? Um? Yeah? And 0:15:33.240 --> 0:15:35.560 so for the smart List podcast, you guys are gonna 0:15:35.600 --> 0:15:37.840 what are you gonna do? Bring guests on for the show. 0:15:37.960 --> 0:15:39.640 So we're gonna do it just like the podcast, which 0:15:39.640 --> 0:15:41.680 I don't know if people know the conceit of our 0:15:41.720 --> 0:15:44.680 show of our smart List, it's called is one of 0:15:44.720 --> 0:15:46.280 us brings on the guests that the other two don't 0:15:46.280 --> 0:15:48.720 know about, and it's a surprise to the other two, 0:15:48.920 --> 0:15:51.080 so they interview them without being prepared or anything. That 0:15:51.160 --> 0:15:53.240 just asked questions in real time like we're doing right now, 0:15:53.560 --> 0:15:56.760 and so we'll do this to our just exactly the same. So, 0:15:56.880 --> 0:15:58.680 which is gonna be really fun to try to keep 0:15:58.680 --> 0:16:02.240 it hidden. Yeah, how many backstage like and and you're 0:16:02.400 --> 0:16:06.920 huge big names. How fun is that? How cool? Yeah? 0:16:06.960 --> 0:16:08.640 I had a great time being on the podcast. Thank 0:16:08.640 --> 0:16:10.920 you for asking, Thank you for coming on. You're so funny. 0:16:10.960 --> 0:16:13.560 Oh my god, that story about that car ride, that 0:16:13.680 --> 0:16:18.200 the road trip with the guy in the hotel and cocaine. Yeah, 0:16:18.240 --> 0:16:20.960 that cocaine story was a good wit. I want to 0:16:20.960 --> 0:16:23.080 ask you something that because you you seem to have 0:16:23.200 --> 0:16:27.760 like unbelievably boundless energy. You are always and I'm not 0:16:27.840 --> 0:16:30.840 just saying this, it's really inspiring to me and I'm 0:16:30.840 --> 0:16:33.440 sure other people that want to do this, But you 0:16:33.560 --> 0:16:36.000 just seem to be always on the road, always creating something, 0:16:36.000 --> 0:16:38.880 always writing a book, always just in it and creating 0:16:38.880 --> 0:16:41.880 and creating and creating. Why where do you get that from? 0:16:42.360 --> 0:16:44.360 Don't you ever get exhausted and you want to quit? 0:16:44.480 --> 0:16:47.680 Like what's the deal. I think that's a question for 0:16:47.720 --> 0:16:49.240 the end of the show, when you're supposed to ask 0:16:49.240 --> 0:16:53.280 me a question. You just got here so a way 0:16:53.320 --> 0:16:54.920 to try and get the funk out of here as 0:16:54.960 --> 0:16:57.120 soon as you sat down. This is just like hanging 0:16:57.120 --> 0:17:00.440 out with you in real life. And to tell the 0:17:00.520 --> 0:17:03.600 story about bringing you to Chicago with me, that was 0:17:03.640 --> 0:17:05.600 so fun. That was so fun, But you were such 0:17:05.600 --> 0:17:08.520 a pain in the ass about it. Because remember I 0:17:08.560 --> 0:17:10.119 was doing my book tour for Life Will be the 0:17:10.160 --> 0:17:12.320 Death of Me and you and Scottie were coming. You 0:17:12.359 --> 0:17:13.920 were nice enough to say, yes, you were going to 0:17:14.000 --> 0:17:16.679 interview me somewhere in Chicago. I said, do I have 0:17:16.680 --> 0:17:18.960 to read the book? You're like, I'm not talking. Yes, 0:17:19.000 --> 0:17:20.680 I said, yeah, you got to read the fucking book, 0:17:20.720 --> 0:17:22.520 you asshole, Like, I mean, how hard is it to 0:17:22.520 --> 0:17:24.200 read a book? But apparently in this town it is 0:17:24.240 --> 0:17:28.480 fucking hard the whole thing. Yes, Because then you realize 0:17:28.480 --> 0:17:31.560 we had so many commonalities and similarities in our upbringing 0:17:31.600 --> 0:17:34.000 and just like kind of Mayhem, and you come from 0:17:34.040 --> 0:17:36.639 a large family that's dysfunctional as well. I mean, I 0:17:36.680 --> 0:17:39.359 don't know many families that aren't were dysfunctional. At this point, 0:17:39.960 --> 0:17:42.399 and then we had a couple of drinks before we 0:17:42.440 --> 0:17:45.840 went on stage. Yeah yeah, which was the theme of 0:17:45.840 --> 0:17:48.359 that tour. Everyone who I brought on that tour needed 0:17:48.359 --> 0:17:50.760 to drink before they got on stage. So by the 0:17:50.800 --> 0:17:52.919 time we got on stage with half the people, like 0:17:53.040 --> 0:17:55.880 Leah REMANI did my l a one and she had 0:17:55.920 --> 0:17:58.720 Fireball for the very first time in her life. She 0:17:58.720 --> 0:18:02.080 had four shots of fireballs Fireball exactly. I didn't I 0:18:02.119 --> 0:18:03.960 didn't know this until then either. And now I know 0:18:04.000 --> 0:18:06.760 it's the thing or something. It's well, you don't even 0:18:06.800 --> 0:18:08.359 have to light because it feels like it's it tastes 0:18:08.400 --> 0:18:11.160 like it's a lit already. Now I know it from 0:18:11.160 --> 0:18:13.800 skiing because my friend from skiing like fireball. So it's 0:18:13.800 --> 0:18:15.840 a great like warming drink, like if you need to 0:18:15.880 --> 0:18:20.400 warm up in your yeah, something like that. And they 0:18:20.440 --> 0:18:22.480 say it actually has like a little bit of anti 0:18:22.560 --> 0:18:24.680 freeze in it, like not feel anti freeze, but it's 0:18:24.680 --> 0:18:27.400 banned in Europe. It's like hot cinnamon is very bad 0:18:27.400 --> 0:18:29.160 for you. Okay, Well, I don't mind drinking a little 0:18:29.160 --> 0:18:31.000 bit of anti freeze. I mean there are worse things 0:18:31.000 --> 0:18:34.199 that I put in this body. Yeah, did you get 0:18:34.280 --> 0:18:37.800 COVID by the way, oh quit high five? Did you know? 0:18:37.960 --> 0:18:40.600 I did it right? But wait, we were talking about 0:18:40.640 --> 0:18:44.160 the tour drinking and we came out. Oh yeah, Sorry, 0:18:44.160 --> 0:18:46.760 I've got a bit discursive today because I'm so excited 0:18:46.800 --> 0:18:49.560 to see you, seeing you, and so long I know, 0:18:49.960 --> 0:18:53.560 to be here and on you and you and inside 0:18:53.560 --> 0:18:58.879 of me. Yes, it's such a dream come true. I 0:18:58.920 --> 0:19:01.640 remember the remember the time we ever, ever, ever met. 0:19:01.760 --> 0:19:05.879 It was out of charity backstage, and you remember there 0:19:05.880 --> 0:19:09.080 were a lot of balls. It was. I think it 0:19:09.080 --> 0:19:12.200 was an Alzheimer's benefit. Okay, and you go and this 0:19:12.240 --> 0:19:16.440 one goes never met, and she's sitting in the like 0:19:16.720 --> 0:19:19.200 you're sitting backstage up against the wall with your legs crossed, 0:19:19.240 --> 0:19:20.880 kind of slouched over with a drink in your hand, 0:19:21.080 --> 0:19:23.560 kind of like just like a real judge. Look. And 0:19:23.640 --> 0:19:28.040 I walked past you go, hey, Jack's will here, And 0:19:28.080 --> 0:19:30.600 I was like, I don't that doesn't sound like me 0:19:30.640 --> 0:19:33.760 at all. I think when I met you told me 0:19:33.800 --> 0:19:36.560 that you weren't out of the closet. I did. I 0:19:36.600 --> 0:19:39.320 think you did. I think you were joking and I 0:19:39.680 --> 0:19:42.560 and that made me laugh, Like I said something about 0:19:42.560 --> 0:19:44.840 you being gay, and you said, I'm not out of 0:19:44.880 --> 0:19:47.600 the closet and I started laughing hysterically. I was like, 0:19:47.720 --> 0:19:52.760 whether you are or not? You are? No, I was, well, 0:19:52.840 --> 0:19:56.200 ever since yeah, ever since you started well expressing yourself, 0:19:56.440 --> 0:20:01.119 really chatting, how was I would imagine that you enjoyed 0:20:01.200 --> 0:20:05.399 COVID with Scottie because you're antisocial. No, I'm not. I 0:20:05.400 --> 0:20:07.640 I mean, yeah, you are. No, not really, I mean 0:20:07.640 --> 0:20:10.840 are you? Are you sometimes? Yeah? No? No, I am 0:20:10.880 --> 0:20:13.480 antisocial because of COVID question. Let me tell you something. 0:20:13.480 --> 0:20:16.000 I learned a lot from Maria Striver, who's you know, 0:20:16.760 --> 0:20:18.639 you have to go over there by the way Sunday 0:20:18.720 --> 0:20:21.640