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Speaker 1: Thanks, old man.

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Speaker 2: The as Garden residents are joining us this week and next.

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Speaker 2: I'm so excited for you to hear their stories. All

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Speaker 2: of them are eighty years old and plus, and we

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Speaker 2: have stories from their lives that I'm really honored that

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Speaker 2: they're letting me share with you. This week we have Sandra, Dave,

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Speaker 2: and Carol all joining the show. So sit back and

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Speaker 2: enjoy some very beautiful story times. Miss Sandra joins me

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Speaker 2: right now. I am so excited to chat with you.

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Speaker 2: We have a published author in our midst. How are you.

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Speaker 1: I'm good, I'm happy.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, excited to talk all about some fun stuff of

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Speaker 2: your life in your book. Yes, so, miss Ander, we

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Speaker 2: start with this. How old are you?

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Speaker 1: I am eighty? Well, I'll be eighty four in just

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Speaker 1: a couple of days.

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Speaker 2: Oh, happy early birthday. Yeah, very exciting. But you either

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Speaker 2: just mentioned or a published author. Is this your one book?

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Speaker 2: Are you writing another book? What's happening.

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Speaker 1: I'm writing another book right now and I have space

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Speaker 1: and time to do it here at Abe's Garden, and

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Speaker 1: it is wonderful and I have a lot of support

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Speaker 1: in doing it. But this is the book I have published.

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Speaker 2: Okay, and it's called Sweet Adversity Sweat Adversity. Read the

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Speaker 2: subtitle A Southern writer finds stories and good in everything.

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Speaker 2: Tell me about this, Tell me why you wrote this book.

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Speaker 1: Well, I've worked for thirty four years, and I was

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Speaker 1: so busy with taking raising children, and then I had

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Speaker 1: both the care both my parents for about five years.

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Speaker 1: And I've always written, but I've never been able to

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Speaker 1: get my book done. So when I came to Abes Garden,

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Speaker 1: I started on my book. I've been here two years

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Speaker 1: and it was published on my eighty third birthday last year. Wow,

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Speaker 1: May the thirty first.

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Speaker 2: Did you always want to be a writer?

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Speaker 1: I have always written. I have a journalism degree, and

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Speaker 1: I've always written, and I've taught writing. I've taught creative

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Speaker 1: writing at a community college, and this is just my thing.

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Speaker 1: I don't play cards, I don't smoke or drink or

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Speaker 1: do anything we could. I just write.

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Speaker 2: Do you also like to read too?

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Speaker 1: I love to read. I think you have to read

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Speaker 1: to be a writer. If you don't read, it's very

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Speaker 1: difficult to write.

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Speaker 2: What made you get into journalism and creative writing in

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Speaker 2: the first place.

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Speaker 1: Well, I took journalism in high school even and I

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Speaker 1: worked on the school paper. But the big honor of

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Speaker 1: my life when I was eighteen was I was selected

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Speaker 1: to write the teen Talk topics column for the local paper.

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Speaker 1: I'm from Oakridge, Tennessee, and I went to Oakridge High School.

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Speaker 2: What were you writing about? Teen talk? Oh?

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Speaker 1: My goodness. I did two columns a week for the

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Speaker 1: local newspaper about teen activities. So anything that young people

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Speaker 1: were doing in town, I would write about it. And

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Speaker 1: one of the best things about this I got invited

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Speaker 1: to every party. I got invited to every dance. I

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Speaker 1: got invited to things where I wondered why did they

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Speaker 1: invite me? And then I remembered they want their name in.

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Speaker 2: The paper, So you're writing all the stuff.

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Speaker 1: And I did, and I covered not just the popular people.

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Speaker 1: I covered everybody. So people still remember that. I wrote

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Speaker 1: teen Talk column, the teen Talk Topics column, and I

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Speaker 1: got two dollars a column, so I made four dollars

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Speaker 1: a week writing that book write in the column.

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Speaker 2: Was that really exciting? When you first got that job,

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Speaker 2: You're like, this is what I've wanted to do.

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Speaker 1: It was. I was thrilled.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and then you go on to be I went.

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Speaker 1: To journal them school at the University of Georgia, and

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Speaker 1: I love that and worked on the Red and Black,

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Speaker 1: and I've done some work at the University of Tennessee,

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Speaker 1: worked on the Beacon.

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Speaker 2: Did you always plan that education was going to be

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Speaker 2: in that path?

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Speaker 1: Oh yes, oh yes, so in the.

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Speaker 2: Course of this also being an author, did you ever

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Speaker 2: get married?

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Speaker 1: I did get married. And pardon me for saying this,

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Speaker 1: but I'm very happily divorced.

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Speaker 2: Happily divorced. Tell me about that. Very happy.

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Speaker 1: I met somebody at college. And when you're dating somebody

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Speaker 1: and then after you marry him, they could be quite different.

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Speaker 1: And back in my day, you know, and I will

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Speaker 1: be eighty four on Saturday. Back in my day, if

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Speaker 1: I had lived with him, my parents would have killed me.

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Speaker 1: My grandparents would have died. My grandmother and my mother

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Speaker 1: would have spent hours on the phone crying. We just

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Speaker 1: didn't live with your boyfriend back then. My three pardon

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Speaker 1: me for talking about this.

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Speaker 2: But you can talk about whatever you want.

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Speaker 1: My three grandchildren have lived with their significant others that

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Speaker 1: boyfriends or girlfriends. And the good news is that my

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Speaker 1: grandson lived with his girlfriend and she's a wonderful woman

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Speaker 1: and they're now married. And my middle granddaughter doesn't exactly

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Speaker 1: live with him, but they spend a lot of time together.

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Speaker 2: If you get my drift.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and then my oldest granddaughter lived with her boyfriend

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Speaker 1: and decided this is not gonna work. If I had

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Speaker 1: lived with the person I married, I would have known

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Speaker 1: not to marry in first week.

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Speaker 2: I knew.

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Speaker 1: But that's what are under the bridge.

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Speaker 2: So how long did you guys end up being married for?

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Speaker 1: I hate to tell you this, it's very embarrassing. Thirty

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Speaker 1: nine years.

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Speaker 2: And you knew in the first week of living with

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Speaker 2: him that you should not be married.

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Speaker 1: I did, But you know, back in those days everything's

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Speaker 1: different now. Back in those days, what happened is you

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Speaker 1: try to make the best of it. You know, nice

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Speaker 1: girls don't get divorced. Divorce was very.

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Speaker 2: Rare, okay, But what did he do that this is

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Speaker 2: coming to your mind in that first week. Well, if

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Speaker 2: you want to share.

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Speaker 1: Well, he just was acted sort of crazy that he

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Speaker 1: was bipolar, oh goodness, undiagnosed by polar and he wouldn't

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Speaker 1: take his medication and it was just very difficult. But

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Speaker 1: in the meantime, I had two children, and you know,

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Speaker 1: I was a woman of my time, so I thought, well,

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Speaker 1: I'm going to make the best of it. If he

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Speaker 1: can't manage, I will. So he did make me stronger.

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Speaker 1: He did make me very successful at work because he

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Speaker 1: couldn't keep a job.

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Speaker 2: I did so. And you were raising two kids.

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Speaker 1: I raised two kids and they're really, really nice people.

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Speaker 2: What was that like for you? You're going through this and

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Speaker 2: you're realizing this is not my person, but I'm I'm

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Speaker 2: making things work. I'm holding a job, I have two kids.

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Speaker 2: Most women of my era did that, and why do

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Speaker 2: you feel like that was? That was just the.

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Speaker 1: Norm back then? Divorce was something that nice women didn't do,

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Speaker 1: or if they did, it was very rare.

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Speaker 2: And then the moment finally happens where you do get divorced. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: well what happened? Why did you finally decide this is it?

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Speaker 2: I'm done.

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Speaker 1: You got a girlfriend while you were married.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I was so thrilled. I thought, hot dog.

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Speaker 2: This is out, this is my card, this is it.

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Speaker 1: I wouldn't have divorced him for anything but adultery, but

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Speaker 1: that that took care of it.

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Speaker 2: Wow. And so you signed the papers and then you're like, Okay,

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Speaker 2: this is a new life. Did you feel like you

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Speaker 2: had just a entire life, still litle.

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Speaker 1: Never been happier in my adult life. It's really been

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Speaker 1: really nice.

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Speaker 2: Did you ever have the desire to get married again?

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Speaker 1: You make it the joke.

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Speaker 2: If that's I'm gonna take that asn't know. I love

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Speaker 2: this for you. You're focused on your books and you're writing.

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Speaker 1: You focus on my writing. And I've just had a

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Speaker 1: wonderful time. I've traveled a lot, and I have many

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Speaker 1: many friends, and I've just had such a good life.

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Speaker 1: And I've been able to manage my own money and

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Speaker 1: I made some and I've been able to pick up

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Speaker 1: my own clothes and pick up my own furniture, and

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Speaker 1: I didn't have to ask anybody. And I just love that.

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Speaker 2: If you could go back and do it again, would

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Speaker 2: you not get married?

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Speaker 1: I would probably get married, but I think i'd wait

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Speaker 1: a while and maybe kind of test the waters a

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Speaker 1: little bit before getting married. That's exactly right.

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Speaker 2: But it did bring you your kids, So is that

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Speaker 2: where the how the strength comes from?

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Speaker 1: I have wonderful kids, I really do. My son has

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Speaker 1: a marketing and public relations business Atlanta, and he also

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Speaker 1: does stand up comedy and he's just started out intending

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Speaker 1: just to do stand up comedy when one gig a

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Speaker 1: month and now he's getting something like almost all the time,

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Speaker 1: and he goes to the different comedy clubs in and

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Speaker 1: around Atlanta.

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Speaker 2: Do you think he's funny, he's hilarious.

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Speaker 1: Well, for one thing, he had a crazy father and

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Speaker 1: he had a mother I won't describe myself. And he

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Speaker 1: had my parents who were hilarious, and he had grandparents

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Speaker 1: on the other side who were hilarious. So he tells

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Speaker 1: wonderful stories. I mean, he's got plenty of material, and so.

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Speaker 2: Do I, which is why you wrote a book. Yes,

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Speaker 2: So when you're talking in this book, are you talking

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Speaker 2: about this kind of new lease on life and things

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Speaker 2: that changed over the course of time for you?

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Speaker 1: Well, this book has a variety of stories in it.

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Speaker 1: I've got a couple of Vietnam stories in it.

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Speaker 2: Okay, that era, Vietnam War era? Yeah, yeah, what was

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Speaker 2: that like?

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Speaker 1: It was scary, you know, it really was, because there

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Speaker 1: are people here in this country opposed to it, and

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Speaker 1: then there are people, people's sons dying over there. And

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Speaker 1: I was just thinking, I'm so glad my son is young,

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Speaker 1: or he would have been drafted. I mean, they were

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Speaker 1: drafting everybody. So I wrote a story about a young couple.

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Speaker 1: My story. There's a story called Blue Bronco in here.

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Speaker 1: And one of the things I like about this story

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Speaker 1: is a person who is a writer read the story.

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Speaker 1: He was fancy. He's read my whole book and he

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Speaker 1: was very complimentary about it. And he's a writer at

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Speaker 1: Swanee and he's read that book. He read the story

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Speaker 1: the Blue Bronco and he said, I'd like to know

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Speaker 1: more about those characters.

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Speaker 3: Well, what they.

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Speaker 1: Are is young people in high school in Sneadville, Tennessee,

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Speaker 1: and they're seniors in high school. The girl really really

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Speaker 1: wants to get married just as soon as they graduate. Well,

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Speaker 1: the war was raging, and the young man knew that

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Speaker 1: if he didn't join the army or some branch of

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Speaker 1: the service, he was going to get drafted. And she said, oh, no,

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Speaker 1: you won't get drafted. And he said, well, I'm afraid

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Speaker 1: I will. I think I better join up because I

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Speaker 1: think i'd have a better chance of not getting sent

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Speaker 1: to Vietnam. And so this story goes back and forth

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Speaker 1: with her putting the pressure on him and him saying.

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Speaker 2: Oh, I don't know, I don't know.

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Speaker 1: I love you but I don't know. And then at

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Speaker 1: the end, when I graduate from high school, I think

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Speaker 1: he deliberately has a breakup with her, and then he says,

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Speaker 1: pardon me for giving away the end of the story.

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Speaker 1: The day after he graduates from high school, he cleans

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Speaker 1: the mud off his blue Bronco and drivets to Knoxville

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Speaker 1: and joins the army, and he says the last word

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Speaker 1: of the story is war is hell, but getting married

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Speaker 1: is worse.

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Speaker 2: So I feel like there was some inspiration there, something there, yeah,

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Speaker 2: something a little bit. I love that you wrote about

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Speaker 2: this and you share how much of your story when

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Speaker 2: you do look at your life and we talk a

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Speaker 2: little bit about regrets. What's like your favorite moment from

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Speaker 2: your story, because we did talk about your marriage, but

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Speaker 2: I know there was a lot of highlights for you.

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Speaker 1: Well, my brother and I are eighteen months apart, and

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Speaker 1: there's quite a few stories in here about things that

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Speaker 1: my brother and I did when we were young, because

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Speaker 1: we were like twins. And so the first story, Sweet Adversity,

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Speaker 1: is a story about me and my brother, and it's

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Speaker 1: thinly disguised as fiction, but it's really a true story

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Speaker 1: with some fictional touches.

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Speaker 2: Is it related to a big adventure you guys had.

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Speaker 1: Oh it is, yes, okay. My mother was a great

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Speaker 1: giver of Tony Home permanence, and that's something you probably

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Speaker 1: have never heard of.

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Speaker 2: I haven't.

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Speaker 1: They were very much the fad in the early fifties.

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Speaker 1: Everybody wanted a Tony Home permanent. My mother was the

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Speaker 1: queen of giving Tony Home permanence. They had little plastic

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Speaker 1: rollers and and and the solution smelled horrible. It was

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Speaker 1: just terrible.

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Speaker 2: What is a Tony Home.

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Speaker 1: It's a permanent?

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Speaker 2: Well you a.

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Speaker 1: No, no, no, it's like beauty shops used to give permanence.

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Speaker 2: Oh perms.

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Speaker 1: Yeahm yes, it's a perm Okay, pardon me for not

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Speaker 1: using it.

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Speaker 2: No, it's okay, now, it's okay, now I know.

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Speaker 1: But you'd buy the Tony Home Permanent at the at

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Speaker 1: the drug store, and everybody in the neighborhood wanted one. Well,

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Speaker 1: my mother gave all the Tony Home permanence, and she

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Speaker 1: had to get me and my brother out of the

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Speaker 1: house when this was going on because she had to

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Speaker 1: follow a schedule that went to neutralize it and all

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Speaker 1: this kind of stuff. So she was given a perm

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Speaker 1: to my cousin my older cousin. So she told us

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Speaker 1: to go outside, and she told us not to go

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Speaker 1: across the street and play with the children across the

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Speaker 1: street because they were not our kind of people.

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Speaker 2: Did you go play with the kids across the street?

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Speaker 1: Of course we did. I mean that's like saying, I mean,

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Speaker 1: tell me not to do something, that's what I'm going

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Speaker 1: to do. Particularly when I was young.

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Speaker 2: It sounds like a lot of your personality throughout your life.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, So we went across the street and we played

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Speaker 1: with those kids, and a couple of things happened, and

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Speaker 1: their mother got mad, and she came over and she

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Speaker 1: and my mother got into a little a little spat

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Speaker 1: about their mother accused us of misbehavior. My mother accused

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Speaker 1: them of misbehavior. And so you were a wild child, well,

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Speaker 1: not well wild in terms of the era what young

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Speaker 1: people do now, I wouldn't even have thought of.

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Speaker 2: Oh that's fair. Yeah, things were a little bit different.

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Speaker 2: You're a wild child for your time.

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Speaker 1: That's exactly right.

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Speaker 2: I see.

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Speaker 1: And my brother was was very compliant, very quiet, and

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Speaker 1: I could get him to do whatever I wanted him

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Speaker 1: to do.

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Speaker 2: Are you a troublemaker? Now?

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Speaker 1: You?

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Speaker 2: You looked at some people in the room, which made

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Speaker 2: me think that you definitely are well. No, I want

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Speaker 2: to know. This is something that I asked towards the

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Speaker 2: end of this. When you look at your life and

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Speaker 2: all the things that have happened in it, what's a

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Speaker 2: piece of advice or motivation or inspiration that you'd want

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Speaker 2: other people to hear from you.

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Speaker 1: Well, one thing, the first bit of advice I would

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Speaker 1: give is like, this book means a lot to me,

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Speaker 1: and I'm writing another one. And I think older people,

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Speaker 1: just because you get old doesn't mean you can't do

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Speaker 1: something you've always wanted to do. If you want to

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Speaker 1: travel somewhere, get a ticket, if you want to knit

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Speaker 1: a bedspread or whatever, do it. Whatever you want to do,

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Speaker 1: it's possible to do it. You might have to temper

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Speaker 1: it a little bit based on your age and infirmity,

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Speaker 1: but you don't have to sit and moan and say, oh,

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Speaker 1: I'm getting old. You can you can do there's something

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Speaker 1: you can do.

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Speaker 2: That's a really good reminder.

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Speaker 1: And those who live at Apes Garden can do any

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Speaker 1: number of things. I mean, there's a chorus, there's trips,

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Speaker 1: there's outings, there's card games, there's bingo, there's everything. There's

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Speaker 1: there's no excuse for not doing anything.

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Speaker 2: What's something that you wish that you knew about getting older?

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Speaker 1: Well, I've been very surprised at some of the physical

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Speaker 1: things that happen, and I blessedly still have my mind

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Speaker 1: and that may go tomorrow, and I realize that. But

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Speaker 1: your hair gets thinner, your skin gets thinner, you put

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Speaker 1: on weight in places that you don't want weight. They're

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Speaker 1: just things that happened. I mean, I have age spots

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Speaker 1: on my hand, just like my grandmother did. And you

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Speaker 1: wear here in age wear glasses. You just can't win.

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Speaker 1: But it's all worth it to grow older and to

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Speaker 1: be happy.

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Speaker 2: That's a really good part of that.

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Speaker 1: And let me give my commercial bat Ape's Garden too.

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Speaker 2: Okay, bring it to me, Sandra.

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Speaker 1: I am very very happy here. And one reason I'm

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Speaker 1: happy here is because it was my decision to come.

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Speaker 1: I have neuropathy in both of my legs, my lower

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Speaker 1: legs and feet, and I don't walk very well, and

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Speaker 1: so I was a fall risk. And a couple of

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Speaker 1: times I lived in a condo down the street here

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Speaker 1: and a couple of times I fell and I thought,

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Speaker 1: you know, I don't need to be here. By myself

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Speaker 1: in this two bedroom, two bathroom condo. I need to

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Speaker 1: go somewhere where I'm safe. And I visited different places

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Speaker 1: around town, and I walked in the door here and

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Speaker 1: it felt happy. This is a place. Nobody said anything

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Speaker 1: right away, but it just felt good, and it is good.

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Speaker 1: It's very happy.

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Speaker 2: Did you have a misconception of senior living facilities before?

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Speaker 1: Well, other people do. I have so many friends who say, oh,

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Speaker 1: I want to stay in my own home, and my

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Speaker 1: thought and what I usually say, well, isn't it rather lonely?

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Speaker 1: You're in your own home by yourself, isn't it lonely?

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Speaker 1: Or you're in your house with a husband and you're

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Speaker 1: kind of tired of each other, you know, or me,

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Speaker 1: it's just really nice to live in community.

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Speaker 2: I have to ask you this because you've been so

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Speaker 2: honest and so kind. Uh oh, If people are thinking

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Speaker 2: of getting married, would you tell them to still get

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Speaker 2: married despite things that you went through, or you're like,

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Speaker 2: maybe second guess that.

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Speaker 1: I would advise people to check out the product as

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Speaker 1: best they can, get to know the person as best

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Speaker 1: they can, get to know their family, get to know

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Speaker 1: some history, take your time.

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Speaker 2: That's a really good reminder, I think for a lot

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Speaker 2: of people. So thank you so much, Sander for sharing

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Speaker 2: so much and being so open with your whole story,

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Speaker 2: and just thank you for being here.

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Speaker 3: Well.

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Speaker 1: I shudder to think what my daughter and son will

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Speaker 1: say when they see this.

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Speaker 2: I think they're gonna love it. You think so I do.

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Speaker 2: You're awesome, You have so much good spirit, and you'll

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Speaker 2: thank you.

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Speaker 3: This has been fun.

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Speaker 2: Davis joining me. Dave, how are you?

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Speaker 4: How you feeling just fine? For a walk in the

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Speaker 4: courtyard earlier today and it was very pleasant out there.

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Speaker 2: I love your outfit too. Can you tell me a

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Speaker 2: little bit about this hat, this shirt, what we got

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Speaker 2: going on.

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Speaker 4: It's just one of these things that I put on

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Speaker 4: for Veterans Day holiday and the Memorial Day and things

376
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Speaker 4: like that, to remind me of my twenty four year

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Speaker 4: career in the Navy.

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Speaker 2: Twenty four years in the Navy, is that always what

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Speaker 2: you wanted to do?

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Speaker 4: It was one of the things that I had an

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Speaker 4: early introduction. My dad was in the Navy as an

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Speaker 4: enlisted sailor right at the end of World War One.

383
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Speaker 4: I was fortunate to have a Navy HOROTC. Sky at

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Speaker 4: the University of Michigan, which got me through college with

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Speaker 4: minimal expense on my part and my family's part. And

386
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Speaker 4: I went into the Navy for six years of active

387
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Speaker 4: duty and stayed, loved it.

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Speaker 2: And daved tell everybody how old you are? Eighty Look

389
00:20:16,320 --> 00:20:18,800
Speaker 2: at you, mister eighty eight? You were cracking a joke.

390
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Speaker 2: What's your nickname?

391
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Speaker 4: A planic man?

392
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Speaker 2: Why is that?

393
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Speaker 4: Because I've got scars on my knees for two knee replacements,

394
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Speaker 4: scars on my hips for two hip replacements, and a

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Speaker 4: bovying a bovine not a poor scene, Heartfelves.

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Speaker 2: Is this from all your time in the Navy? Are

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Speaker 2: you just you're going so hard serving your country.

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Speaker 4: I can't chuck it up to that. No, it's just life.

399
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Speaker 2: Life, okay. And why'd you decide to stay in the Navy?

400
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Speaker 2: You served for six years and then he decided to stay.

401
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Speaker 4: Why the Navy continued to send me the neat places

402
00:20:53,440 --> 00:20:57,920
Speaker 4: in the world, jobs of greater responsibility? And I felt

403
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Speaker 4: like I was serving my country and you.

404
00:21:01,320 --> 00:21:03,480
Speaker 2: Served in the Vietnam War. Is that why you have

405
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Speaker 2: that hat?

406
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Speaker 4: That's why I have that head?

407
00:21:05,760 --> 00:21:07,280
Speaker 2: What was the Vietnam War?

408
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Speaker 4: Like?

409
00:21:07,840 --> 00:21:10,359
Speaker 2: I wasn't born until nineteen ninety three. So I have

410
00:21:10,840 --> 00:21:14,119
Speaker 2: zero experience knowledge of anything besides what they taught us

411
00:21:14,160 --> 00:21:17,000
Speaker 2: in history class. So what was that like living through

412
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Speaker 2: that and serving.

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Speaker 4: I was one of the fortunate ones. I didn't live

414
00:21:20,680 --> 00:21:24,840
Speaker 4: in Vietnam on a long term basis. I was assigned

415
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Speaker 4: to a Navy patrol squadron based in Hawaii. We were

416
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Speaker 4: temporarily deployed to Okinawa in the Pacific for six months,

417
00:21:34,760 --> 00:21:40,000
Speaker 4: and we rotated cruse of flight crews reconnaissance flight cruise

418
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Speaker 4: into Cameron Bay in Vietnam flying patrols in the Tonkin Gulf.

419
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Speaker 4: So we would go in there for a couple weeks

420
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Speaker 4: at a time and that we'd be replaced by another crew.

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Speaker 4: And our function was to report to South Vietnam authorities

422
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Speaker 4: the attempted intrusion by North via Nam by boat into

423
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Speaker 4: the South so that they could intercept and stop them

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Speaker 4: from landing in South Vietnam. And that was our mission,

425
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Speaker 4: plus that we were protecting any of our aircraft carriers

426
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Speaker 4: that were working in the Tonkin Gulf at that time.

427
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Speaker 2: Did you witness things there that were just stuff that

428
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Speaker 2: you wish you never had seen.

429
00:22:24,680 --> 00:22:28,160
Speaker 4: I did not personally know. We were our operation did

430
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Speaker 4: not involve going out in direct contact with the enemy.

431
00:22:32,359 --> 00:22:35,399
Speaker 4: The closest we came was we were raised out of

432
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Speaker 4: the barracks one night. The North Vietnamese were trying to

433
00:22:38,760 --> 00:22:41,920
Speaker 4: come through the fence, and they put us into a

434
00:22:42,119 --> 00:22:47,080
Speaker 4: underground bunker, sandbag bunker until the area could be cleared.

435
00:22:47,840 --> 00:22:50,840
Speaker 4: So I was, like I say, I was very fortunate

436
00:22:50,880 --> 00:22:53,480
Speaker 4: that we were not in the direct line of fire

437
00:22:53,680 --> 00:22:55,600
Speaker 4: like many of our troops were on the ground.

438
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Speaker 2: Did you have a lot of friends that also served

439
00:22:58,040 --> 00:22:59,920
Speaker 2: at the time, quite a few.

440
00:23:00,080 --> 00:23:02,920
Speaker 4: Yes. I lost to several in the fighting in Vietnam,

441
00:23:04,040 --> 00:23:09,640
Speaker 4: and that was tragic. I cannot I don't know whether

442
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Speaker 4: you've ever had a chance to visit the Vietnam Wall

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00:23:12,840 --> 00:23:16,720
Speaker 4: exhibit in Washington, d c. The Black Wall, where they

444
00:23:16,720 --> 00:23:20,800
Speaker 4: have all fifty eight thousand names of people who lost

445
00:23:20,800 --> 00:23:24,760
Speaker 4: their lives, Americans who lost their lives in that war.

446
00:23:25,800 --> 00:23:29,840
Speaker 4: But you can't help see that but be very emotionally

447
00:23:30,040 --> 00:23:34,320
Speaker 4: moved by how many good people were lost.

448
00:23:34,800 --> 00:23:37,520
Speaker 2: And for you as a human outside of being in

449
00:23:37,520 --> 00:23:40,480
Speaker 2: the Navy, what was it like living in a world

450
00:23:40,520 --> 00:23:42,160
Speaker 2: at that time where that was all going on?

451
00:23:43,320 --> 00:23:46,520
Speaker 4: I was part of your daily routine. Basically, it's sad

452
00:23:46,560 --> 00:23:49,399
Speaker 4: to say, but it was a day by day job.

453
00:23:50,160 --> 00:23:53,080
Speaker 4: You got up not knowing what to expect. You knew

454
00:23:53,080 --> 00:23:55,479
Speaker 4: you were going to fly a patrol to do certain things,

455
00:23:56,400 --> 00:23:59,160
Speaker 4: and you knew hopefully that the landing strip would.

456
00:23:58,960 --> 00:24:02,080
Speaker 2: Be there when you got and you were married. Did

457
00:24:02,080 --> 00:24:03,639
Speaker 2: you get married before you started serving?

458
00:24:04,240 --> 00:24:06,560
Speaker 4: No, I got married after I'd been in the Navy

459
00:24:06,640 --> 00:24:08,520
Speaker 4: for about five years.

460
00:24:08,800 --> 00:24:11,480
Speaker 2: Okay, how did you guys meet?

461
00:24:11,840 --> 00:24:13,399
Speaker 4: Oh? I don't know whether we have enough time in

462
00:24:13,440 --> 00:24:14,320
Speaker 4: the interview for that.

463
00:24:14,520 --> 00:24:16,600
Speaker 2: Oh, bring it, I'm ready for it.

464
00:24:18,480 --> 00:24:22,600
Speaker 4: An early squadron mate of mine was stationed with the

465
00:24:22,880 --> 00:24:27,520
Speaker 4: Air America Group CIA Group in Cambodia at the time,

466
00:24:28,160 --> 00:24:31,639
Speaker 4: and he was bringing a gift jacket, red knit jacket

467
00:24:31,720 --> 00:24:35,920
Speaker 4: back from Hong Kong for a buddy of his who

468
00:24:36,000 --> 00:24:39,200
Speaker 4: was my wife, Judy's roommate living in Vallejo, California at

469
00:24:39,200 --> 00:24:41,880
Speaker 4: the time. So I provided transportation to get the code

470
00:24:41,960 --> 00:24:45,479
Speaker 4: up there, and we appeared on the doorstep unannounced with

471
00:24:45,560 --> 00:24:49,479
Speaker 4: this coat draped over our arm, and we met. This

472
00:24:49,640 --> 00:24:53,919
Speaker 4: was in November of nineteen sixty three. I proposed in

473
00:24:53,920 --> 00:24:57,520
Speaker 4: February of sixty four. We were married in August of

474
00:24:57,600 --> 00:25:01,080
Speaker 4: sixty four, and we've been married for sixty almost sixty

475
00:25:01,119 --> 00:25:01,720
Speaker 4: one years.

476
00:25:03,320 --> 00:25:05,600
Speaker 2: So when you arrived on the porch, where you like,

477
00:25:05,840 --> 00:25:06,960
Speaker 2: I'm in love with this woman.

478
00:25:08,000 --> 00:25:10,240
Speaker 4: No, but after we had a couple of dates. We

479
00:25:10,320 --> 00:25:14,159
Speaker 4: had our first date dinner in San Francisco. Our second

480
00:25:14,240 --> 00:25:17,560
Speaker 4: date was on the Veterans Day weekend in Lahole. We

481
00:25:17,600 --> 00:25:20,280
Speaker 4: went to the Napa Valley and drank wine all afternoon.

482
00:25:20,920 --> 00:25:22,359
Speaker 2: Did you get a little wild? This is where she

483
00:25:22,400 --> 00:25:23,200
Speaker 2: saw your wild side?

484
00:25:23,400 --> 00:25:26,199
Speaker 4: So this is it's been a quite a story.

485
00:25:27,000 --> 00:25:29,359
Speaker 2: How did you ask her when you're on that doorstep?

486
00:25:29,440 --> 00:25:32,400
Speaker 2: What sequence of events? There's a stranger standing on her doorstep?

487
00:25:32,840 --> 00:25:34,800
Speaker 2: How did you ask her out on a date?

488
00:25:34,840 --> 00:25:35,359
Speaker 3: What happened?

489
00:25:35,440 --> 00:25:38,639
Speaker 4: She didn't even notice the fact that we were naval officers.

490
00:25:38,680 --> 00:25:42,159
Speaker 4: She just hollered to her roommate. She said, Ellen, your

491
00:25:42,200 --> 00:25:43,520
Speaker 4: redknit code is here.

492
00:25:44,320 --> 00:25:45,160
Speaker 2: And that was it.

493
00:25:46,359 --> 00:25:49,200
Speaker 4: So that was it and the rest is history. Anyway,

494
00:25:49,240 --> 00:25:52,520
Speaker 4: we have a son and a daughter grown living here

495
00:25:52,520 --> 00:25:55,080
Speaker 4: in Nashville, so we're very fortunate in that regard.

496
00:25:55,960 --> 00:25:58,840
Speaker 2: And what's the secret to sixty years together? What did

497
00:25:58,840 --> 00:26:01,840
Speaker 2: you guys do that made that so awesome? In work

498
00:26:01,880 --> 00:26:02,480
Speaker 2: for that long?

499
00:26:05,000 --> 00:26:07,560
Speaker 4: If I knew I would bottle it. Yeah, And make

500
00:26:07,600 --> 00:26:08,320
Speaker 4: a fortune.

501
00:26:08,640 --> 00:26:10,960
Speaker 2: You did something right me the right people.

502
00:26:11,000 --> 00:26:15,200
Speaker 4: I guess we traveled a lot, We spent some time apart,

503
00:26:15,440 --> 00:26:17,760
Speaker 4: which may have helped.

504
00:26:18,440 --> 00:26:20,239
Speaker 2: What is that hard on you guys because you were

505
00:26:20,280 --> 00:26:23,240
Speaker 2: still serving? Is that hard for you guys' relationship?

506
00:26:23,280 --> 00:26:25,640
Speaker 4: And I was very fortunate because the longest we were

507
00:26:25,680 --> 00:26:30,119
Speaker 4: ever separated for a straight period of time was probably

508
00:26:30,160 --> 00:26:35,640
Speaker 4: four or five months. Nothing like some of these sailors

509
00:26:35,680 --> 00:26:38,680
Speaker 4: they go out for a six month deployment, they get

510
00:26:38,680 --> 00:26:42,640
Speaker 4: it extended for nine months, and they've lost a year

511
00:26:42,680 --> 00:26:46,200
Speaker 4: of their lives with their families. I've been blessed.

512
00:26:46,960 --> 00:26:48,879
Speaker 2: And when you first started dating her and you were

513
00:26:48,880 --> 00:26:51,120
Speaker 2: going on all these first date what were the qualities

514
00:26:51,160 --> 00:26:52,960
Speaker 2: that you saw on her and you were just like, Yeah,

515
00:26:52,960 --> 00:26:54,200
Speaker 2: this is going to be my bride.

516
00:26:55,200 --> 00:27:00,320
Speaker 4: She was a Midwestern girl, farm raised in Iowa, up

517
00:27:00,320 --> 00:27:04,159
Speaker 4: in the big city of Detroit. She was down to earth,

518
00:27:05,119 --> 00:27:13,480
Speaker 4: great sense of humor, beautiful blue eyes. One of those

519
00:27:13,520 --> 00:27:15,000
Speaker 4: things it just happened.

520
00:27:15,160 --> 00:27:16,760
Speaker 2: What did you guys spend a lot of time doing

521
00:27:16,800 --> 00:27:18,320
Speaker 2: together in those sixty years that you had said, you

522
00:27:18,359 --> 00:27:20,159
Speaker 2: guys traveled a lot. What were your guys as hoppies.

523
00:27:20,200 --> 00:27:22,320
Speaker 2: What were the things you guys enjoyed together.

524
00:27:22,840 --> 00:27:27,239
Speaker 4: We played golf together. We played tennis, not together, but

525
00:27:27,560 --> 00:27:32,240
Speaker 4: both played tennis. We both enjoyed riding our bicycles, enjoyed

526
00:27:32,240 --> 00:27:35,560
Speaker 4: going to movies. We enjoyed a lot of the same foods.

527
00:27:36,480 --> 00:27:38,280
Speaker 4: She was a good cook. I'm a good eater.

528
00:27:40,720 --> 00:27:43,159
Speaker 2: What was your favorite dish that she made for you?

529
00:27:44,680 --> 00:27:48,080
Speaker 4: Oh, it was probably corn on the cob Iowa.

530
00:27:48,240 --> 00:27:52,920
Speaker 2: Style, Sara and Iowa style that I'm from Kansas and

531
00:27:53,000 --> 00:27:54,680
Speaker 2: we had great corn on the cob.

532
00:27:54,840 --> 00:27:55,600
Speaker 4: I'm sure you did.

533
00:27:55,840 --> 00:27:58,560
Speaker 2: What is the Iowa style that I'm unfamiliar with?

534
00:27:58,880 --> 00:28:01,320
Speaker 4: It was cooked bile, beautiful lady from Iowa.

535
00:28:01,560 --> 00:28:04,040
Speaker 2: I see, this is like the engagement chicken. I don't

536
00:28:04,040 --> 00:28:05,760
Speaker 2: know if you've heard of this, but apparently there's this

537
00:28:06,040 --> 00:28:08,919
Speaker 2: engagement chicken that if you would like your man to

538
00:28:09,000 --> 00:28:12,560
Speaker 2: propose to you, the woman makes this engagement chicken and

539
00:28:12,600 --> 00:28:17,199
Speaker 2: it's supposed to make the process happen quicker happened. So

540
00:28:17,240 --> 00:28:20,439
Speaker 2: it was the Iowa style corn on the cob your ticket.

541
00:28:20,720 --> 00:28:22,600
Speaker 4: I didn't think about it at the time, but maybe

542
00:28:22,600 --> 00:28:22,879
Speaker 4: it was.

543
00:28:23,720 --> 00:28:26,800
Speaker 2: That was the reason. How long were you guys together

544
00:28:26,880 --> 00:28:28,119
Speaker 2: before you had proposed.

545
00:28:28,880 --> 00:28:32,320
Speaker 4: Let's see, she was living in Valley Hill, with her

546
00:28:32,600 --> 00:28:36,159
Speaker 4: friend from Iowa who was a teacher at that time.

547
00:28:36,320 --> 00:28:38,680
Speaker 4: And I was living in Mountain View Station at Moffatt

548
00:28:38,720 --> 00:28:42,800
Speaker 4: Field in California, near San Francisco. And like I say,

549
00:28:42,800 --> 00:28:47,920
Speaker 4: we met in November, I proposed in February. We got

550
00:28:47,920 --> 00:28:52,720
Speaker 4: married in May Island Naval Shipyard Chapel in August of

551
00:28:52,800 --> 00:28:53,960
Speaker 4: nineteen sixty four.

552
00:28:54,280 --> 00:28:57,800
Speaker 2: So all within one year your life changed. Is that

553
00:28:57,880 --> 00:28:59,440
Speaker 2: crazy to think about?

554
00:29:00,080 --> 00:29:02,920
Speaker 4: And very blessed in that way. Everything just fell in place,

555
00:29:03,040 --> 00:29:07,720
Speaker 4: not just from that marriage but from my life in general.

556
00:29:08,440 --> 00:29:11,920
Speaker 2: Were you guys communicating via letters when you were stationed

557
00:29:11,920 --> 00:29:13,360
Speaker 2: apartment letters.

558
00:29:13,040 --> 00:29:16,120
Speaker 4: And we sent periodic and magnetic tape recordings back and

559
00:29:16,160 --> 00:29:20,600
Speaker 4: forth so I could talk to the kids on magnetic

560
00:29:20,640 --> 00:29:24,080
Speaker 4: tape when I was a board ship and undeployments.

561
00:29:25,040 --> 00:29:26,560
Speaker 2: Do you still have those today?

562
00:29:26,840 --> 00:29:28,400
Speaker 4: I still have a lot of them. As a matter

563
00:29:28,440 --> 00:29:30,800
Speaker 4: of fact, A lot of that is stuff that's in

564
00:29:30,880 --> 00:29:35,360
Speaker 4: our apartment waiting to be reread and cleansed.

565
00:29:36,080 --> 00:29:40,720
Speaker 2: Saving for the kids to see one day. Right when

566
00:29:40,760 --> 00:29:42,719
Speaker 2: you look back on your life and you did the Navy,

567
00:29:42,800 --> 00:29:45,720
Speaker 2: and you got married, and all of this sounds so beautiful.

568
00:29:45,800 --> 00:29:48,320
Speaker 2: Was there any regrets that you had over the course

569
00:29:48,360 --> 00:29:49,480
Speaker 2: of time when you look back.

570
00:29:49,680 --> 00:29:54,720
Speaker 4: No regrets at all, No regrets at all. I think

571
00:29:54,800 --> 00:29:58,880
Speaker 4: life is what you make it. Don't think you're guaranteed anything,

572
00:29:59,520 --> 00:30:05,200
Speaker 4: not even life itself. Just go forward as it's there.

573
00:30:05,720 --> 00:30:10,360
Speaker 2: Live very in the present moment. Is this a Navy term?

574
00:30:10,640 --> 00:30:12,800
Speaker 4: That's four years of Spanish I took in high school.

575
00:30:14,480 --> 00:30:15,360
Speaker 2: What does it mean?

576
00:30:16,440 --> 00:30:17,640
Speaker 4: Whatever it will be will be.

577
00:30:18,680 --> 00:30:21,280
Speaker 2: I like it. This is a good life motto that

578
00:30:21,320 --> 00:30:24,320
Speaker 2: we lived. Your life by those very small years of Spanish.

579
00:30:24,680 --> 00:30:27,760
Speaker 4: Boy scouts, be prepared, you have to be.

580
00:30:27,960 --> 00:30:33,959
Speaker 2: Were you also a boy scout very briefly? Okay, you

581
00:30:34,000 --> 00:30:36,360
Speaker 2: do seem like you got the boy scout mentality in there.

582
00:30:37,920 --> 00:30:41,240
Speaker 4: I was a boy scout for sure, the tenderfoot rating.

583
00:30:41,320 --> 00:30:43,080
Speaker 4: And then in Detroit I had to go out in

584
00:30:43,120 --> 00:30:46,360
Speaker 4: the wintertime. We're on a camping trip overnight, and we

585
00:30:46,440 --> 00:30:49,880
Speaker 4: had to go out in a snowfall and find dry

586
00:30:49,960 --> 00:30:52,400
Speaker 4: enough wood that we could build a fire to cook

587
00:30:52,440 --> 00:30:56,360
Speaker 4: a steak. And that steak was terrible. It was cold.

588
00:30:59,040 --> 00:31:01,560
Speaker 4: I gave up scouting and went to softball instead.

589
00:31:02,440 --> 00:31:06,000
Speaker 2: The fair change. I understand when you're looking at your

590
00:31:06,040 --> 00:31:10,680
Speaker 2: life in those stories, First, what's one of your favorite moments?

591
00:31:10,720 --> 00:31:13,000
Speaker 2: What is your favorite memory that you wish you could

592
00:31:13,040 --> 00:31:14,320
Speaker 2: live over and over again.

593
00:31:19,760 --> 00:31:22,440
Speaker 4: There are so many. I feel very blessed at having

594
00:31:22,520 --> 00:31:28,360
Speaker 4: so many. Some things that still create great emotion for me,

595
00:31:29,720 --> 00:31:32,360
Speaker 4: as being in the presence of the United States Marine

596
00:31:32,400 --> 00:31:36,000
Speaker 4: Corps band when they play our national anthem.

597
00:31:37,600 --> 00:31:38,880
Speaker 2: I bet that sounds really cool.

598
00:31:39,160 --> 00:31:42,240
Speaker 4: Something that's here and it always will be.

599
00:31:43,520 --> 00:31:46,440
Speaker 2: Does it remind you of the time you were serving?

600
00:31:46,600 --> 00:31:47,640
Speaker 2: What's that emotion?

601
00:31:48,560 --> 00:31:51,840
Speaker 4: A very blessed life. You can't look around the world

602
00:31:51,880 --> 00:31:56,160
Speaker 4: today and see what's going on and not feel very blessed.

603
00:31:57,480 --> 00:32:01,120
Speaker 4: Even in the midst of a fire drill. Things happen

604
00:32:01,200 --> 00:32:03,680
Speaker 4: backlog on Interviewees.

605
00:32:07,760 --> 00:32:10,400
Speaker 2: You are so funny certain days.

606
00:32:10,440 --> 00:32:12,520
Speaker 4: Oh, but you look at what the people in Gaza

607
00:32:12,560 --> 00:32:15,120
Speaker 4: and Ukraine are going through right now. They have nothing.

608
00:32:15,680 --> 00:32:18,960
Speaker 4: Everything they've lived and worked for, in cases died for

609
00:32:19,160 --> 00:32:20,880
Speaker 4: is laying out.

610
00:32:20,880 --> 00:32:25,280
Speaker 2: There's rubble in the streets, watching things and just events

611
00:32:25,280 --> 00:32:27,880
Speaker 2: as they've happened. With everything that you've experienced and all

612
00:32:27,920 --> 00:32:32,840
Speaker 2: that you've done, what's your takeaway as you look at

613
00:32:32,880 --> 00:32:34,080
Speaker 2: the world today.

614
00:32:34,280 --> 00:32:38,920
Speaker 4: There we need to do better mankind, not just us.

615
00:32:39,520 --> 00:32:42,920
Speaker 4: Mankind needs to do better about looking out for.

616
00:32:42,960 --> 00:32:46,400
Speaker 2: Mankind people, looking out for people a.

617
00:32:46,400 --> 00:32:50,680
Speaker 4: Little bit better, exactly exactly. This is one of the

618
00:32:50,800 --> 00:32:54,000
Speaker 4: one of the things that I appreciate about being here

619
00:32:54,040 --> 00:32:59,520
Speaker 4: at Abes. It's the fact that I'm ancient along with

620
00:32:59,560 --> 00:33:03,080
Speaker 4: all the other the residents here here. Not ancient, but

621
00:33:03,320 --> 00:33:06,920
Speaker 4: I'm so blessed in terms of physical and mental health

622
00:33:07,880 --> 00:33:11,360
Speaker 4: that I have that I can be of assistance to

623
00:33:11,440 --> 00:33:15,680
Speaker 4: many of those here who don't have all of it.

624
00:33:16,680 --> 00:33:20,360
Speaker 4: If I can do that's a plus. Shooting got a

625
00:33:20,480 --> 00:33:23,640
Speaker 4: very nice certificate signed by the Secretary of the Navy

626
00:33:24,600 --> 00:33:28,080
Speaker 4: thanking her for her service as a Navy spouse.

627
00:33:29,000 --> 00:33:30,440
Speaker 2: What did you feel like when she got that?

628
00:33:30,720 --> 00:33:39,800
Speaker 4: I was very greatly rewarded. Because the spouse very often

629
00:33:39,840 --> 00:33:43,400
Speaker 4: got left at that time, mostly male but now male

630
00:33:43,520 --> 00:33:46,920
Speaker 4: or female, is ordered to go someplace else for duty.

631
00:33:47,720 --> 00:33:50,760
Speaker 4: They get left with cleaning up the house, getting the

632
00:33:50,840 --> 00:33:55,520
Speaker 4: kids packed, and making the move, and they don't get

633
00:33:55,520 --> 00:33:58,880
Speaker 4: thanked for that very often. And I think that it's

634
00:33:58,920 --> 00:34:02,720
Speaker 4: important that somebody the higher echelons there understand what they

635
00:34:02,800 --> 00:34:05,280
Speaker 4: have to go through every time we made a move.

636
00:34:06,600 --> 00:34:09,640
Speaker 2: You saying this, Dave, makes me want to ask you,

637
00:34:10,160 --> 00:34:12,600
Speaker 2: there's so many guys out there, and a lot of

638
00:34:12,600 --> 00:34:14,560
Speaker 2: people who are trying to day learning what it means

639
00:34:14,560 --> 00:34:17,200
Speaker 2: to be a partner. What advice would you give guys

640
00:34:17,800 --> 00:34:20,440
Speaker 2: that you feel like they might be missing to have

641
00:34:20,520 --> 00:34:22,399
Speaker 2: a marriage and a success that you've had.

642
00:34:23,520 --> 00:34:26,920
Speaker 4: The biggest thing I would say would be to recognize

643
00:34:26,960 --> 00:34:33,120
Speaker 4: that when you make that proposal, recognize the fact that

644
00:34:33,200 --> 00:34:38,480
Speaker 4: you are asking her to participate in a life of

645
00:34:38,520 --> 00:34:42,920
Speaker 4: the two of you together. I have a nephew, for example,

646
00:34:42,960 --> 00:34:46,400
Speaker 4: who was married many years ago. They was married for

647
00:34:46,440 --> 00:34:51,160
Speaker 4: six months, and what it evolved was the fact that

648
00:34:51,560 --> 00:34:58,319
Speaker 4: they got married for marriage sake, but neither one of

649
00:34:58,360 --> 00:35:04,160
Speaker 4: them gave up their sa relationships. He did his things

650
00:35:04,200 --> 00:35:07,480
Speaker 4: with his buds, She continued to do her things with

651
00:35:07,640 --> 00:35:13,640
Speaker 4: her buds, and they didn't form any relationships involving the

652
00:35:13,680 --> 00:35:16,160
Speaker 4: both of them. And I don't think you can do

653
00:35:16,200 --> 00:35:20,319
Speaker 4: it that way. You gotta. It's an all or nothing thing.

654
00:35:20,920 --> 00:35:24,319
Speaker 4: Not to say you can't maintain those relationships, but not

655
00:35:24,440 --> 00:35:28,279
Speaker 4: that let them take priority for the relationships you build

656
00:35:28,320 --> 00:35:29,880
Speaker 4: between the two of you.

657
00:35:29,920 --> 00:35:32,840
Speaker 2: See, you have so much wisdom to share, lived a

658
00:35:32,880 --> 00:35:33,480
Speaker 2: lot of life.

659
00:35:34,880 --> 00:35:36,359
Speaker 4: Not the gray hair is surprise you.

660
00:35:36,760 --> 00:35:40,160
Speaker 2: They're not surprising me at all. I would like you

661
00:35:40,200 --> 00:35:42,520
Speaker 2: to share one more piece of advice if you will,

662
00:35:42,560 --> 00:35:44,520
Speaker 2: Maybe it's two people out there who are your age,

663
00:35:44,520 --> 00:35:47,320
Speaker 2: maybe younger, or just anything that you think is important

664
00:35:47,360 --> 00:35:50,000
Speaker 2: to share that you've learned over the course of your life.

665
00:35:54,880 --> 00:35:58,640
Speaker 4: Enjoy it for as long as you have it, use it,

666
00:35:58,960 --> 00:36:01,880
Speaker 4: or lose it. Philosop be about exercise.

667
00:36:01,800 --> 00:36:02,760
Speaker 2: Kind of like the knees.

668
00:36:02,920 --> 00:36:05,600
Speaker 4: Yeah, go out and walk every day, go out and

669
00:36:05,680 --> 00:36:08,520
Speaker 4: ride the bike and the gym down there. Do something

670
00:36:08,600 --> 00:36:12,840
Speaker 4: to keep active as active as you can, and eventually

671
00:36:12,840 --> 00:36:14,920
Speaker 4: it's going to catch up. The old body just doesn't

672
00:36:14,920 --> 00:36:16,080
Speaker 4: hold up the way it used to.

673
00:36:17,960 --> 00:36:20,320
Speaker 2: Something about you, though, tells me that you're still living

674
00:36:20,440 --> 00:36:21,160
Speaker 2: just like you used to.

675
00:36:22,400 --> 00:36:25,120
Speaker 4: I don't play golf anymore or tennis because I'm afraid

676
00:36:25,160 --> 00:36:27,839
Speaker 4: that if I swing a club two yard, I'm gonna

677
00:36:27,880 --> 00:36:30,560
Speaker 4: fall down on the t box and that's kind of embarrassing.

678
00:36:30,719 --> 00:36:34,960
Speaker 2: So I don't feel like anything would be embarrassing for you.

679
00:36:35,320 --> 00:36:37,319
Speaker 2: I think you'd make a really good joke out of it.

680
00:36:38,080 --> 00:36:41,120
Speaker 2: Try were you a prankster in your family? Would you

681
00:36:41,120 --> 00:36:42,040
Speaker 2: prank with the kids?

682
00:36:42,120 --> 00:36:44,440
Speaker 4: And No, it was a very straight laced guy. As

683
00:36:44,480 --> 00:36:49,600
Speaker 4: I recall, my memory is deteriorated now.

684
00:36:49,680 --> 00:36:53,839
Speaker 2: You just make jokes all the time. Oh, Dave, thank

685
00:36:53,880 --> 00:36:56,279
Speaker 2: you for being here with me sharing your story, and.

686
00:36:57,880 --> 00:36:59,240
Speaker 4: Thank you for being so kind.

687
00:37:00,560 --> 00:37:08,280
Speaker 2: You're always welcome. Carol joins me right now. Hi, Carol,

688
00:37:08,280 --> 00:37:09,239
Speaker 2: thank you for being here.

689
00:37:09,440 --> 00:37:10,799
Speaker 3: Oh, thank you for asking me.

690
00:37:11,000 --> 00:37:13,600
Speaker 2: I'm excited to hear your story. Can you share with

691
00:37:13,640 --> 00:37:14,840
Speaker 2: everyone how old you are?

692
00:37:15,640 --> 00:37:17,719
Speaker 3: I'm eighty five, eighty.

693
00:37:17,480 --> 00:37:19,520
Speaker 2: Five, very young, eighty five. You look wonderful.

694
00:37:19,640 --> 00:37:20,000
Speaker 3: Thank you?

695
00:37:20,200 --> 00:37:21,080
Speaker 2: You feel wonderful.

696
00:37:22,160 --> 00:37:26,319
Speaker 3: I do. I'm not every day, but most of the time.

697
00:37:26,600 --> 00:37:29,879
Speaker 2: Hey, well take that. That's better than most. Right. And

698
00:37:30,080 --> 00:37:32,440
Speaker 2: what did you spend a lot of your life doing, Carol?

699
00:37:32,520 --> 00:37:33,520
Speaker 2: Occupation wise?

700
00:37:33,719 --> 00:37:36,840
Speaker 3: Oh? Well, I was mostly a mother of five children

701
00:37:37,840 --> 00:37:42,759
Speaker 3: and a wife to my husband. And we moved to

702
00:37:42,880 --> 00:37:47,759
Speaker 3: Florida in nineteen seventy eight because my husband had heart problems,

703
00:37:47,800 --> 00:37:51,040
Speaker 3: so we went so we had the warm weather and

704
00:37:51,520 --> 00:37:54,040
Speaker 3: we ended up living there forty years.

705
00:37:54,320 --> 00:37:56,239
Speaker 2: How long were you and your husband married for?

706
00:37:56,680 --> 00:37:59,040
Speaker 3: If he was alive today, it would have been sixty

707
00:37:59,200 --> 00:38:02,520
Speaker 3: six years. It was fifty six years when he died

708
00:38:03,160 --> 00:38:04,120
Speaker 3: that we've been together.

709
00:38:04,360 --> 00:38:06,160
Speaker 2: Were you high school sweethearts? Or how to tell me?

710
00:38:06,239 --> 00:38:06,319
Speaker 4: No?

711
00:38:06,400 --> 00:38:07,440
Speaker 3: I met him in college.

712
00:38:07,880 --> 00:38:10,800
Speaker 2: Was it fun love at first sight? You knew? No?

713
00:38:11,040 --> 00:38:13,800
Speaker 3: Because I was coming. I was on the stairs and

714
00:38:13,840 --> 00:38:16,680
Speaker 3: I was coming in the door to the classroom and

715
00:38:16,840 --> 00:38:18,960
Speaker 3: he was coming the other way and knocked me down.

716
00:38:19,480 --> 00:38:23,160
Speaker 2: He knocks you down, and you still said he did?

717
00:38:23,560 --> 00:38:24,239
Speaker 2: You'll take him?

718
00:38:24,560 --> 00:38:25,560
Speaker 3: Yes? Exactly?

719
00:38:27,760 --> 00:38:30,280
Speaker 2: Was that the first moment and you guys started dating

720
00:38:30,360 --> 00:38:30,759
Speaker 2: after that?

721
00:38:31,080 --> 00:38:31,239
Speaker 4: Well?

722
00:38:31,400 --> 00:38:34,680
Speaker 3: Because I didn't know him before then. He was a

723
00:38:34,760 --> 00:38:38,600
Speaker 3: year ahead of me, And no, I didn't really know him.

724
00:38:38,760 --> 00:38:40,840
Speaker 3: I might have seen him in the halls or something.

725
00:38:41,239 --> 00:38:42,640
Speaker 2: What were you studying in college?

726
00:38:42,920 --> 00:38:44,000
Speaker 3: Teach to be a teacher?

727
00:38:44,480 --> 00:38:46,280
Speaker 2: So did you end up doing any teaching?

728
00:38:46,560 --> 00:38:48,520
Speaker 3: Or I had children instead?

729
00:38:48,920 --> 00:38:50,879
Speaker 2: Okay, and became a stay at home mom.

730
00:38:51,080 --> 00:38:53,439
Speaker 3: I taught my children. I hope, yeah.

731
00:38:54,000 --> 00:38:55,560
Speaker 2: Were they homeschool or they.

732
00:38:55,440 --> 00:38:58,719
Speaker 3: Would know they are. But I hope that we set

733
00:38:58,760 --> 00:39:02,040
Speaker 3: a good example for and made rules that you know,

734
00:39:02,120 --> 00:39:03,000
Speaker 3: they abided by.

735
00:39:03,440 --> 00:39:05,600
Speaker 2: It's a lot of kiddos. Was that always the plan?

736
00:39:06,280 --> 00:39:10,040
Speaker 3: No, My mother had nine and I knew that I

737
00:39:10,080 --> 00:39:13,640
Speaker 3: didn't want nine, and I didn't even really think about five.

738
00:39:14,920 --> 00:39:18,920
Speaker 3: I really four was the idea because I had two

739
00:39:19,000 --> 00:39:21,160
Speaker 3: boys and two girls, and I thought, well, that's the

740
00:39:21,200 --> 00:39:27,240
Speaker 3: perfect family. But then when we moved to Florida, probably

741
00:39:27,280 --> 00:39:30,480
Speaker 3: because maybe a little homesick or whatever. I got pregnant

742
00:39:31,080 --> 00:39:32,080
Speaker 3: with the fifth one.

743
00:39:32,680 --> 00:39:35,600
Speaker 2: Is there a big age gap between the four and

744
00:39:35,640 --> 00:39:36,040
Speaker 2: that one?

745
00:39:36,320 --> 00:39:40,399
Speaker 3: Uh? Well, yeah, there's I see Mary Beth who works here.

746
00:39:41,080 --> 00:39:45,120
Speaker 3: She was eight years old when Jennifer was born. It

747
00:39:45,239 --> 00:39:47,800
Speaker 3: was like an eight year but I had a sixteen

748
00:39:47,840 --> 00:39:52,160
Speaker 3: year old daughter and she it was almost like it

749
00:39:52,200 --> 00:39:52,920
Speaker 3: was her child.

750
00:39:53,560 --> 00:39:53,880
Speaker 2: Really.

751
00:39:54,040 --> 00:39:57,400
Speaker 3: Yeah, we'd go out and like to the pool or whatever,

752
00:39:57,840 --> 00:40:00,000
Speaker 3: because she always was with her and looking at her,

753
00:40:01,239 --> 00:40:03,520
Speaker 3: and they all thought I was a grandmother and she

754
00:40:03,719 --> 00:40:04,200
Speaker 3: was the mother.

755
00:40:06,400 --> 00:40:07,840
Speaker 2: You're like, no, that is my child.

756
00:40:08,000 --> 00:40:10,160
Speaker 3: Yeah it is. I mean, if you want to take over.

757
00:40:11,239 --> 00:40:16,319
Speaker 2: And now, do your kids all have grandkids for you?

758
00:40:16,640 --> 00:40:21,680
Speaker 3: Yes? I have eleven grandchildren and I have two great

759
00:40:21,719 --> 00:40:23,480
Speaker 3: grandchildren and one on the way.

760
00:40:24,239 --> 00:40:27,000
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, what's that been like for you to get

761
00:40:27,040 --> 00:40:28,960
Speaker 2: to see the different generations? Now?

762
00:40:29,480 --> 00:40:34,759
Speaker 3: It's good. I really enjoyed the great grandchildren, especially they're

763
00:40:34,800 --> 00:40:39,360
Speaker 3: small now they're five and three, but it's so much nicer.

764
00:40:39,440 --> 00:40:42,480
Speaker 3: They're not yours, and you don't have to well you

765
00:40:42,560 --> 00:40:46,120
Speaker 3: do worry, but you don't have that responsibility, so you

766
00:40:46,360 --> 00:40:47,520
Speaker 3: sort of enjoy a more.

767
00:40:47,920 --> 00:40:49,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, you'd have a little bit more fun. They're not

768
00:40:49,880 --> 00:40:54,080
Speaker 2: technically yours to worry about exactly. Do you like the

769
00:40:54,520 --> 00:40:58,720
Speaker 2: title more now of grandma or mom? Which one feels

770
00:40:58,760 --> 00:41:01,680
Speaker 2: more meaningful to you? Because I know they both are.

771
00:41:02,360 --> 00:41:07,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, I guess mom still means the most. You know.

772
00:41:07,840 --> 00:41:10,399
Speaker 3: Some of my children call me mom and some call

773
00:41:10,480 --> 00:41:12,239
Speaker 3: me mother mother. Yeah.

774
00:41:12,320 --> 00:41:14,600
Speaker 2: Is that when you're you're doing something bad and their mother?

775
00:41:14,800 --> 00:41:17,120
Speaker 3: That's my daughter, Mary Beth, the one that works there,

776
00:41:17,200 --> 00:41:18,080
Speaker 3: She calls me mother.

777
00:41:20,600 --> 00:41:22,960
Speaker 2: It might just be a younger thing. I know sometimes

778
00:41:23,000 --> 00:41:27,960
Speaker 2: we call people mother. That's a very young term to use. Yeah.

779
00:41:28,000 --> 00:41:30,440
Speaker 2: What was that like for you? Being a stay at

780
00:41:30,440 --> 00:41:32,839
Speaker 2: home mom? Is that something that you're so happy you did?

781
00:41:33,000 --> 00:41:33,839
Speaker 2: Or did you have any ever?

782
00:41:33,960 --> 00:41:34,600
Speaker 1: Graduated?

783
00:41:34,840 --> 00:41:37,279
Speaker 3: I enjoyed it. I did go to work when my

784
00:41:37,400 --> 00:41:41,320
Speaker 3: last one, Jennifers, when she was two. My neighbor next

785
00:41:41,360 --> 00:41:45,160
Speaker 3: door was watching kids like a little in the house nursery.

786
00:41:46,040 --> 00:41:49,560
Speaker 3: And I went to work part time for Macy's in

787
00:41:49,680 --> 00:41:53,040
Speaker 3: their cash return office, and then I from there I

788
00:41:53,080 --> 00:41:56,279
Speaker 3: went to banking, and then from there I went to

789
00:41:56,520 --> 00:42:02,760
Speaker 3: a health center where I did data entry for people

790
00:42:02,800 --> 00:42:06,800
Speaker 3: that made God false fell and felt like the residents

791
00:42:06,840 --> 00:42:10,880
Speaker 3: when they fall. You had to write this whole, you know, paper,

792
00:42:10,960 --> 00:42:12,720
Speaker 3: and I put it in the computer.

793
00:42:13,360 --> 00:42:14,960
Speaker 2: Do you feel like you had kind of a second

794
00:42:15,000 --> 00:42:16,640
Speaker 2: life when you started working again.

795
00:42:16,719 --> 00:42:18,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, I did. I did.

796
00:42:18,520 --> 00:42:21,040
Speaker 2: Was that always the plan or did it just kind of.

797
00:42:21,000 --> 00:42:25,640
Speaker 3: Fall in my whole life? Nothing was planned. My husband

798
00:42:25,680 --> 00:42:28,279
Speaker 3: had heart trouble. He was at twenty eighty at his

799
00:42:28,400 --> 00:42:33,360
Speaker 3: first heart attack, and we didn't realize what was happening

800
00:42:33,520 --> 00:42:35,680
Speaker 3: until they found you know, they told us he had

801
00:42:35,680 --> 00:42:39,040
Speaker 3: a heart attack. He had to stay in bed. Back then,

802
00:42:39,560 --> 00:42:42,439
Speaker 3: they didn't have as much knowledge as they have now.

803
00:42:42,960 --> 00:42:46,279
Speaker 3: They have to stay in bed for six weeks. And

804
00:42:46,560 --> 00:42:52,240
Speaker 3: so then four years later he had a bypass surgery

805
00:42:52,680 --> 00:42:57,839
Speaker 3: where they took care of the bad artery. And then

806
00:42:58,080 --> 00:43:02,600
Speaker 3: twenty years later he had open heart surgery. Wow, he

807
00:43:02,680 --> 00:43:07,200
Speaker 3: got someone's heart and then from there he lived twenty years.

808
00:43:07,520 --> 00:43:10,240
Speaker 2: Those are not things you're anticipating national find.

809
00:43:10,080 --> 00:43:12,640
Speaker 3: Someone, But we got through it.

810
00:43:13,360 --> 00:43:16,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, were those hard, especially that first one he was so.

811
00:43:16,520 --> 00:43:19,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, it was hard because for one thing, we weren't

812
00:43:19,840 --> 00:43:21,960
Speaker 3: living at home. We were living in Kentucky at the

813
00:43:22,000 --> 00:43:25,080
Speaker 3: time because he had been in the Service, and when

814
00:43:25,080 --> 00:43:26,640
Speaker 3: he got out of the Service, we had made so

815
00:43:26,719 --> 00:43:30,560
Speaker 3: many good friends we just decided to stay and so

816
00:43:30,680 --> 00:43:33,040
Speaker 3: there wasn't anybody really around to help.

817
00:43:33,200 --> 00:43:33,440
Speaker 4: You know.

818
00:43:34,000 --> 00:43:38,960
Speaker 3: I had my oldest daughter and my oldest son were

819
00:43:39,000 --> 00:43:43,160
Speaker 3: babies then, so yeah, it wasn't easy then, but we

820
00:43:43,320 --> 00:43:43,719
Speaker 3: made it.

821
00:43:43,920 --> 00:43:45,800
Speaker 2: And you were also a military spouse.

822
00:43:46,080 --> 00:43:49,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, what was that? He was just a lab check

823
00:43:49,760 --> 00:43:54,319
Speaker 3: at Port Hawks and he never was sent anywhere there

824
00:43:54,400 --> 00:43:58,719
Speaker 3: was dangerous or anything. He just worked on animals and

825
00:43:58,800 --> 00:43:59,640
Speaker 3: all that stuff.

826
00:44:00,080 --> 00:44:02,520
Speaker 2: Well, I'm happy he didn't have to experience that too, And.

827
00:44:02,640 --> 00:44:06,600
Speaker 3: Then he goes, yeah, no, I'm happy to Yeah.

828
00:44:07,040 --> 00:44:10,160
Speaker 2: And when you lost him, what was that experience like

829
00:44:10,280 --> 00:44:13,320
Speaker 2: for you? Because after being together for so many years,

830
00:44:13,960 --> 00:44:14,640
Speaker 2: that's all you know.

831
00:44:15,320 --> 00:44:16,640
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's true.

832
00:44:16,920 --> 00:44:18,640
Speaker 2: What was that like when he passed?

833
00:44:18,640 --> 00:44:25,600
Speaker 3: And when he passed, well, my friend passed, my husband passed.

834
00:44:27,000 --> 00:44:30,080
Speaker 3: I still have to regret that he's not around where

835
00:44:30,719 --> 00:44:33,680
Speaker 3: I can confide any you know, tell him things that

836
00:44:33,719 --> 00:44:37,239
Speaker 3: I'm excited about. When I was in Franklin, I did

837
00:44:38,080 --> 00:44:41,279
Speaker 3: eucharistic minister and I took communion to people in the

838
00:44:41,320 --> 00:44:44,080
Speaker 3: hospital and I took it to this one lady and

839
00:44:44,200 --> 00:44:49,200
Speaker 3: she was somebody we had known when we were in college.

840
00:44:49,840 --> 00:44:52,600
Speaker 3: And I just couldn't and in my mind, I couldn't

841
00:44:52,600 --> 00:44:56,080
Speaker 3: wait to get home to tell Larry and he wasn't there.

842
00:44:56,239 --> 00:44:59,279
Speaker 3: I mean, he wasn't there anymore, and that hurt. So

843
00:44:59,360 --> 00:45:02,480
Speaker 3: I regret that he's gone for that, but I know

844
00:45:02,560 --> 00:45:03,680
Speaker 3: he's in a better place.

845
00:45:04,920 --> 00:45:08,200
Speaker 2: And his name was Larry, Yeah, Larry. What was your

846
00:45:08,239 --> 00:45:10,640
Speaker 2: favorite memory that you had with Larry?

847
00:45:10,880 --> 00:45:20,440
Speaker 3: With Larry, Well, we went fishing in a secluded pond

848
00:45:20,560 --> 00:45:23,840
Speaker 3: on this farm friend of his, and I was pregnant

849
00:45:23,920 --> 00:45:27,239
Speaker 3: with my first child, so I was out to hear

850
00:45:28,160 --> 00:45:32,880
Speaker 3: and she I got chiggers all over my stomach. I

851
00:45:32,920 --> 00:45:38,600
Speaker 3: mean it was ugly looking all over. And always blame

852
00:45:38,680 --> 00:45:43,239
Speaker 3: him for that. He's the one that took me.

853
00:45:44,680 --> 00:45:45,480
Speaker 2: That's his fault.

854
00:45:45,719 --> 00:45:46,120
Speaker 3: Yeah.

855
00:45:46,160 --> 00:45:47,200
Speaker 2: Did he take the blame for.

856
00:45:47,160 --> 00:45:50,160
Speaker 3: That, Yeah, he did. There's a lot of moments with

857
00:45:50,280 --> 00:45:54,160
Speaker 3: him too, like when he came out of surgery, you know,

858
00:45:54,200 --> 00:45:57,360
Speaker 3: getting the new heart and seeing him there and he

859
00:45:57,480 --> 00:46:02,359
Speaker 3: was hooked up to so many machines, you know, so

860
00:46:02,440 --> 00:46:06,840
Speaker 3: the heart would not reject him. And those were really

861
00:46:06,880 --> 00:46:10,640
Speaker 3: happy moments. We had a lot of good moments.

862
00:46:10,960 --> 00:46:14,960
Speaker 2: What was your favorite quality about Larry that really made

863
00:46:15,040 --> 00:46:16,880
Speaker 2: it like this is going to be my husband?

864
00:46:17,080 --> 00:46:23,960
Speaker 3: Okay? He was very gentle, very gentle, soft spoken, very gentle.

865
00:46:24,000 --> 00:46:26,400
Speaker 3: I'm not that way. I mean, I can be gentle,

866
00:46:26,440 --> 00:46:31,839
Speaker 3: but I'm not soft spoken, and it would be his

867
00:46:31,840 --> 00:46:33,560
Speaker 3: his honesty and patience.

868
00:46:34,160 --> 00:46:37,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, and those are really important quality traits. When your

869
00:46:37,560 --> 00:46:41,120
Speaker 2: kids were looking for partners, yes, were you like they

870
00:46:41,120 --> 00:46:44,400
Speaker 2: have to be like Larry. Larry's a great example.

871
00:46:44,560 --> 00:46:49,040
Speaker 3: I hoped, but I didn't put any preference for them.

872
00:46:49,160 --> 00:46:52,400
Speaker 2: If you just look back on your life that you

873
00:46:52,440 --> 00:46:54,480
Speaker 2: didn't do, or maybe you did do and you wish you.

874
00:46:54,520 --> 00:46:58,960
Speaker 3: Didn't, I'm trying to think. I mean, it was a

875
00:46:59,000 --> 00:47:01,719
Speaker 3: big void and my life although I still had the

876
00:47:01,800 --> 00:47:05,240
Speaker 3: five kids that kept me busy. I mean they were grown,

877
00:47:05,520 --> 00:47:09,000
Speaker 3: going to school when some were married. But it's just

878
00:47:09,080 --> 00:47:12,680
Speaker 3: avoid when you spend that much time with somebody, and

879
00:47:12,719 --> 00:47:15,600
Speaker 3: it's hard to get used to it. But it does

880
00:47:15,640 --> 00:47:16,160
Speaker 3: with time.

881
00:47:17,000 --> 00:47:20,160
Speaker 2: Do you feel like it did? Over time? Start to

882
00:47:20,200 --> 00:47:21,040
Speaker 2: feel better.

883
00:47:20,960 --> 00:47:26,959
Speaker 3: It'll be He's been deceased for ten years now, so yeah,

884
00:47:27,040 --> 00:47:30,399
Speaker 3: it is much easier. But I still, you know, think

885
00:47:30,440 --> 00:47:33,160
Speaker 3: of him and things will come in my head, just

886
00:47:33,280 --> 00:47:36,640
Speaker 3: like this person I met that we both knew. I

887
00:47:36,680 --> 00:47:39,880
Speaker 3: wanted to go home tell him about it because I

888
00:47:39,920 --> 00:47:43,000
Speaker 3: knew he'd be excited that she was in town.

889
00:47:43,280 --> 00:47:46,640
Speaker 2: So did it help you to ever? Still share those

890
00:47:46,640 --> 00:47:49,279
Speaker 2: stories with him, like do you have a photo of him?

891
00:47:49,320 --> 00:47:51,440
Speaker 3: And oh I have? You know, I have two photos

892
00:47:51,480 --> 00:47:52,280
Speaker 3: in my apartment.

893
00:47:52,320 --> 00:47:55,040
Speaker 2: I mean, and telling those stories does that help?

894
00:47:55,840 --> 00:47:58,239
Speaker 3: You know? I did tell him the one about her

895
00:47:58,560 --> 00:48:01,799
Speaker 3: seeing her in the hospital and how I wish he

896
00:48:01,840 --> 00:48:02,560
Speaker 3: had been there.

897
00:48:03,600 --> 00:48:07,080
Speaker 2: What's things that you do now activity wise or maybe

898
00:48:07,440 --> 00:48:11,080
Speaker 2: other things that help you remember that life you guys

899
00:48:11,120 --> 00:48:12,840
Speaker 2: had together bring you joy?

900
00:48:13,280 --> 00:48:15,520
Speaker 3: Well, I really don't do a lot of things that

901
00:48:16,320 --> 00:48:20,200
Speaker 3: I used to do when when he was alive. We

902
00:48:20,320 --> 00:48:25,080
Speaker 3: played golf every Sunday with this souther couple and he

903
00:48:25,200 --> 00:48:28,040
Speaker 3: taught me to play golf, even then when I wasn't

904
00:48:28,480 --> 00:48:31,799
Speaker 3: reacting very well to his teaching, like comy lessons from

905
00:48:31,840 --> 00:48:35,200
Speaker 3: somebody else. But he was a good golfer. So we'd

906
00:48:35,200 --> 00:48:37,680
Speaker 3: play golf every Sunday. And you know, I don't do

907
00:48:37,800 --> 00:48:39,759
Speaker 3: that anymore. I didn't even do that when I was

908
00:48:40,120 --> 00:48:43,120
Speaker 3: before I you know, fell and all that good stuff.

909
00:48:43,760 --> 00:48:47,600
Speaker 3: But yeah, there's a lot of things like getting together

910
00:48:48,480 --> 00:48:51,640
Speaker 3: with the kids for dinner or going out. You know,

911
00:48:52,560 --> 00:48:53,480
Speaker 3: you're miss him.

912
00:48:53,520 --> 00:48:57,200
Speaker 2: What about you when you look back at your happiest

913
00:48:57,239 --> 00:49:00,000
Speaker 2: moments of your life and you're thinking of half time,

914
00:49:00,840 --> 00:49:02,959
Speaker 2: what was that one moment that kind of takes you back.

915
00:49:06,239 --> 00:49:09,680
Speaker 3: I think the happiest moment would be when he was

916
00:49:09,840 --> 00:49:13,239
Speaker 3: told that a heart was available for him. Because we

917
00:49:13,280 --> 00:49:16,319
Speaker 3: had come back from Indiana on vacation and he had

918
00:49:16,320 --> 00:49:21,520
Speaker 3: an appointment at Gainesville at the hospital there and for

919
00:49:21,640 --> 00:49:26,400
Speaker 3: a checkup, and when they checked him, the muscle in

920
00:49:26,440 --> 00:49:31,240
Speaker 3: his heart was just rodding away because of all the

921
00:49:31,280 --> 00:49:34,640
Speaker 3: problems he had. His muscle wasn't good anymore, and they

922
00:49:34,680 --> 00:49:37,759
Speaker 3: put him in the hospital right away. He didn't even

923
00:49:37,800 --> 00:49:41,440
Speaker 3: go home with me. I went home by myself, and

924
00:49:41,880 --> 00:49:44,560
Speaker 3: four weeks later they had a heart for him.

925
00:49:45,960 --> 00:49:48,480
Speaker 2: You had so many different experiences of your life, and

926
00:49:48,520 --> 00:49:50,759
Speaker 2: I feel like so much knowledge to share from a

927
00:49:50,800 --> 00:49:54,520
Speaker 2: lot of these. If you could give anybody, whether they're

928
00:49:54,560 --> 00:49:58,080
Speaker 2: your age or younger, or at any point in their life,

929
00:49:58,560 --> 00:50:03,480
Speaker 2: a piece of advice or motivation or inspiration, what do

930
00:50:03,480 --> 00:50:04,360
Speaker 2: you think you would share?

931
00:50:05,480 --> 00:50:08,680
Speaker 3: Oh, God, there's so much you can.

932
00:50:08,560 --> 00:50:09,759
Speaker 2: Share, as much as you want to.

933
00:50:10,960 --> 00:50:13,319
Speaker 3: I do know that I never thought that I'd be

934
00:50:13,360 --> 00:50:17,680
Speaker 3: spending my golden years by myself and not with my husband.

935
00:50:17,719 --> 00:50:20,200
Speaker 3: You know, even though he had heart problems, I knew

936
00:50:20,239 --> 00:50:23,759
Speaker 3: that he'd probably leaves this earth before I did, but

937
00:50:24,239 --> 00:50:28,480
Speaker 3: I just never never thought of it that way, And

938
00:50:29,880 --> 00:50:33,920
Speaker 3: so I think people they need to think more about

939
00:50:33,960 --> 00:50:41,040
Speaker 3: when they get old and be prepared physically, mentally, and financially,

940
00:50:41,719 --> 00:50:44,399
Speaker 3: because when you're alone like that, you have no one

941
00:50:44,440 --> 00:50:47,880
Speaker 3: you can depend on, so you've got to start preparing

942
00:50:48,640 --> 00:50:49,440
Speaker 3: ahead of time.

943
00:50:50,040 --> 00:50:52,279
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a really good piece of advice. And I

944
00:50:52,320 --> 00:50:54,840
Speaker 2: just thank you so much for sharing your story.

945
00:50:55,080 --> 00:50:56,399
Speaker 3: Oh you're welcome.

946
00:50:56,120 --> 00:50:58,960
Speaker 2: In parts of your life with us. Okay, thank you.

947
00:50:59,120 --> 00:51:03,040
Speaker 3: I'm glad to do it. I love talking about him.

948
00:51:03,680 --> 00:51:06,720
Speaker 2: I love hearing you talk about him. It was so lovely.

949
00:51:06,719 --> 00:51:07,640
Speaker 2: Thank you for being here.

950
00:51:07,960 --> 00:51:08,359
Speaker 3: Thank you.

951
00:51:09,000 --> 00:51:10,680
Speaker 2: If you love this week as much as I did,

952
00:51:10,840 --> 00:51:13,160
Speaker 2: get ready for next week because we have even more

953
00:51:13,239 --> 00:51:17,480
Speaker 2: residents from Abes Garden joining to share their stories. Larry,

954
00:51:17,560 --> 00:51:20,839
Speaker 2: Brenda Ward, and Shirley all will be on next week

955
00:51:20,840 --> 00:51:24,200
Speaker 2: with more stories from their lives and experiences. So get

956
00:51:24,239 --> 00:51:27,080
Speaker 2: subscribed so you don't miss a single thing, and follow

957
00:51:27,200 --> 00:51:30,120
Speaker 2: the Instagram page at take this personally so you can

958
00:51:30,440 --> 00:51:33,520
Speaker 2: see photos and videos of all of the residents this

959
00:51:33,600 --> 00:51:36,080
Speaker 2: week and next, and of course all the other posts

960
00:51:36,120 --> 00:51:38,800
Speaker 2: and everything that's all up there. It's a huge support.

961
00:51:38,800 --> 00:51:41,040
Speaker 2: When you guys go and follow those. Thank you and

962
00:51:41,080 --> 00:51:43,600
Speaker 2: thank you for being here. As always, I love you.

963
00:51:44,040 --> 00:51:47,480
Speaker 2: Have a very safe and happy Fourth of July weekend.

964
00:51:47,760 --> 00:51:48,719
Speaker 2: We'll talk next week.