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Speaker 1: Scrubbing in with Beca Tilly and Tanya Red and iHeartRadio.

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Speaker 2: And two time People's Choice Award winning podcast Hello Everybody.

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Speaker 2: We are scrubbing in. Happy Monday.

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Speaker 3: Happy Monday, Everybody, another day to talk. Well, it's actually

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Speaker 3: kind of a wild time because something just happened to

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Speaker 3: me on my son Run. So what happens on Mondays

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Speaker 3: is I do the morning show and then I go

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Speaker 3: on a long run to get my energy back up

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Speaker 3: to do the podcast. Right, So I'm on my son

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Speaker 3: Run And just to be clear, I have been a

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Speaker 3: little bit jumping on my runs lately because like last

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Speaker 3: week I had I ran into like this old trainer

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Speaker 3: of mine from brentwe who I haven't see in years,

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Speaker 3: and he came in like full force during my run

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Speaker 3: and like was chatting with me. And then earlier today

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Speaker 3: I ran into my friend Ashley at the front of

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Speaker 3: like FedEx and she came up and like you know,

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Speaker 3: put her and she was like hey, Like I just like.

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Speaker 4: I saw you before Christmas on your run and I

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Speaker 4: just was like hey and stepped and like step till

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Speaker 4: you'd see me, and you acted like I was about

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Speaker 4: to attack. So I think you're just jumpy.

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Speaker 3: So I'm like very jumpy on my runs, okay, because

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Speaker 3: I also have like my headphones in and I'm just

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Speaker 3: like in a zone, so I'm not really like anticipating

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Speaker 3: other humans, but and.

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Speaker 1: As all been desocialized over the past year.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I think that's a part of it too.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: So I'm on my run and I'm like about to

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Speaker 3: just like run across this crosswalk that I you know

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Speaker 3: ever and I'm on like a really busy street and

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Speaker 3: a smaller street and I'm going it's like the crosswalks

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Speaker 3: as go. So I'm going and this car is making

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Speaker 3: a right hand turn clearly doesn't see me and like

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Speaker 3: kind of doesn't hit me, really doesn't hit me, but

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Speaker 3: startles me so bad. Like it was like Charlotte York

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Speaker 3: status I like Sex and City, where like I like

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Speaker 3: step back and you know, did the whole dramatic.

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Speaker 4: Like like I I might need video footage from the

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Speaker 4: security camera that was able to see this interaction.

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Speaker 3: So he like you know, puts his hand up like

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Speaker 3: I'm so like he was like I'm so sorry, and

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Speaker 3: I you know, it's okay, like super frazzled, but I

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Speaker 3: just like keep running right cut too. I keep running,

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Speaker 3: and this car pulls up on like the side of me,

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Speaker 3: and I just hear this man yell like hey, rolls

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Speaker 3: down his window and pulls out this piece of paper

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Speaker 3: with his phone number on It literally looks like a

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Speaker 3: serial killer. Yeah, wrote in mind you It says, I

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Speaker 3: like to apologize and get you get out, like go

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Speaker 3: and get a drink with you. And I just like

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Speaker 3: literally grabbed it from him and like kept running. I

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Speaker 3: was like, what the f is happening?

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Speaker 5: Wait?

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Speaker 1: How did he have time to write that down? No?

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Speaker 3: He yeah, I don't know how. I mean, maybe that's

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Speaker 3: why it looks like this was no because it was

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Speaker 3: like I when I ran into I don't want to

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Speaker 3: say the streets, but it was.

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Speaker 4: Like I was pretty much sighed, are you talking about

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Speaker 4: one of those side parking lot streets?

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Speaker 3: Yeah? So he went right and then I like he

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Speaker 3: had to probably go all the way around because it

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Speaker 3: was it wasn't very quick after I was like fully

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Speaker 3: back in my run, like you know, back in my element.

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Speaker 3: But the only reason I don't want to reach out.

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Speaker 3: I don't want to. I'm like it's kind of scary,

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Speaker 3: feels like mister wilsh Er two point zero.

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Speaker 6: Like, you know, vehicular manslaughter in there.

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Speaker 3: But here's the thing. Earlier on my run, I run

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Speaker 3: past this leaf and the leaf looks like a butterfly,

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Speaker 3: you guys, It like literally looks like and I to

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Speaker 3: the point where, like I took a picture of it

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Speaker 3: and I posted it on my Instagram. This was like

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Speaker 3: in the beginning of my son run and then I

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Speaker 3: almost get killed, like towards the end.

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Speaker 4: Okay, now she almost got killed, but it wasn't anything earlier,

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Speaker 4: but she almost got killed.

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Speaker 3: Okay, But so I like, that's the only reason why

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Speaker 3: I'm tempted to reach out.

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Speaker 4: Because she saw a leaf that may have resembled a

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Speaker 4: butterfly earlier on.

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Speaker 3: It looked like a butterfly.

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Speaker 4: She's willing to risk her life because something, you know,

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Speaker 4: I'm gonna show you, guys.

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Speaker 2: I note.

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Speaker 4: I was looking at the leaf though that you posted,

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Speaker 4: and it made me think that maybe all leaves kind

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Speaker 4: of could look like a butterfly.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean I could make an argument that looks

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Speaker 1: like a turtle.

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Speaker 4: Basic shape, like, it just feels a little forced.

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Speaker 6: I mean, it looks like a man in a small

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Speaker 6: man in a very large suit.

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Speaker 1: What it is? It looks like whatever you wanted to.

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Speaker 2: Look like, yeah, exactly.

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Speaker 4: It's like when you look at the cloud, do you

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Speaker 4: use your imagination to find the shapes as they look like?

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Speaker 3: Do not find it bizarre that I run into I

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Speaker 3: post this on my story before I even get run over.

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Speaker 1: It looks like a guy riding a giant.

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Speaker 4: Dog that Tanya is wearing a butterfly set as we

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Speaker 4: speak right now. So there's just a lot of symbolism

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Speaker 4: into day's events.

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Speaker 3: There's a lot of symbolism.

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Speaker 2: Okay, So then and obviously it's I just was like, oh,

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Speaker 2: was he like? Was he c like?

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Speaker 1: Were it comes?

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Speaker 4: Sorry I hate to say it, but because that was

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Speaker 4: your only interaction, I'm like, was he cute?

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Speaker 5: Like?

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Speaker 2: Were you attracted to him? And she goes ugly?

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Speaker 4: So you're gonna risk your life because of a butterfly

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Speaker 4: leaf potential with a man who almost killed you according

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Speaker 4: to your story change who you're not even remotely attracted to.

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Speaker 3: I don't know. It's like, you know, when when you're close,

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Speaker 3: when you're near death experience, you don't like look at

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Speaker 3: the man and think like, oh I want to ravage you.

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Speaker 3: Like I looked at him and was like I almost

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Speaker 3: just got run over.

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Speaker 1: Describe him to us.

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Speaker 6: Like if we're police detectives. You know, yeah, i'd.

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Speaker 3: Say, hard to say on the hype, But.

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Speaker 1: Is there a celebrity that he's kind of reminiscent of.

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Speaker 3: That's a good question. Uh yes, Hair like Adam Brody,

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Speaker 3: but like a little bit longer, okay, to like almost

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Speaker 3: surfer vibes. Okay, dark, so like dark curlier curlier hair,

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Speaker 3: not like eastern curly, but like Adam Brody.

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Speaker 2: Okay, Adam Brody.

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Speaker 3: It wasn't Adam Brody. And I would say, I'm trying

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Speaker 3: to get trying to find like a doppelganger.

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Speaker 2: I would say, in a car like car, was it

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Speaker 2: a it was.

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Speaker 3: A I'm terrible with cars, so I don't know it

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Speaker 3: was a Mercedes?

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Speaker 2: Oh no, But what I'm saying, was it suv suv? Okay?

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Speaker 6: Oh, like a g wagon or something?

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Speaker 2: How old? I guess?

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Speaker 3: I guess early thirties. Okay, I'm trying to I'm trying

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Speaker 3: to like really get a good Adam Brody might be

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Speaker 3: the best appel ganger, but like not.

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Speaker 1: It sounds very attractive.

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Speaker 2: Brody is like very good looking.

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Speaker 1: So Adam Brody driving a Mercedes Suv sounds like a

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Speaker 1: catch to me.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, okay, that's you know what. That's the thing. We

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Speaker 3: don't We just don't know. We just don't know.

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Speaker 6: What was the number written on?

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Speaker 1: Again?

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Speaker 6: Is this a scrap of paper? Was it a receipt

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Speaker 6: to something?

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Speaker 3: No, it's a scrap of paper.

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Speaker 6: And and the handwriting is poor, It's very poor.

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Speaker 1: I feel like you should give us the number, and

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Speaker 1: obviously we'll take it out of the podcast and then

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Speaker 1: Easton and I can do some digging.

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Speaker 2: Can we call him on the podcast?

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Speaker 1: I don't know that we want to do that.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, no, no, I here's the thing. I'm like just starting

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Speaker 3: to open myself up to opportunities, and I feel like

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Speaker 3: it's all hitting like at once, like it's all kind

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Speaker 3: of within literally a matter of days. It's like all

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Speaker 3: piling and you know me, like I'm like a little

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Speaker 3: bit of like a one track mind. So it's like,

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Speaker 3: I'm confused, I'm unsure. I feels weird.

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Speaker 1: Well, think about this because honestly, in my perfect world,

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Speaker 1: Seacrest calls him. Well, I'm sorry, that's my perfect world

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Speaker 1: is Seacrest calls him and says, do you do this

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Speaker 1: a lot? I think that would be hilarious.

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Speaker 3: Okay, but you know what, this is interesting to think

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Speaker 3: about it because can I tell you I had this

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Speaker 3: like revolutionary revolutionary is not the right word, A whiplash

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Speaker 3: of whiplash. Sure, Okay, well, I'm just gonna stick with

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Speaker 3: whip blah. I'm gonna make whiplash a thing. I had

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Speaker 3: a whiplash moment with my therapist last week because she

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Speaker 3: was basically telling me. She was like, I don't know

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Speaker 3: why you're so resistant or why you're so closed off

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Speaker 3: to the possibility of men right now. And she's like,

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Speaker 3: I understand you're not wanting to get on dating apps

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Speaker 3: and things like that, like it feels like a lot,

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Speaker 3: but she's like, you have I've been talking to her

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Speaker 3: like I had this guy from my past that's been,

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Speaker 3: you know, found out that I was single and been

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Speaker 3: like coming back in hot and strong and intentional, and

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Speaker 3: then there's another person that wants to set me up

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Speaker 3: with somebody who's like perfectly good, normal and there's like

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Speaker 3: a friend in common, so I know he's not a

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Speaker 3: serial killer. And she was just like, I don't know

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Speaker 3: why you're just so closed off to the possibility. And

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Speaker 3: when she said that, I was like I'm Tanya. I'm

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Speaker 3: open to possibilities. I'm not closed off. But she was right,

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Speaker 3: like she was fully fully right. I've been so kind

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Speaker 3: of like closed off in that sense, you know, And

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Speaker 3: so I kind of had this like whiplash moment in

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Speaker 3: that conversation where I was like, okay, so I started

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Speaker 3: like leaning in, you know, like leaning into these and

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Speaker 3: being open, and then now it's like it's too open,

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Speaker 3: and I like don't know what to do with it,

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Speaker 3: and oh no. And then it led me to the

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Speaker 3: conversation where she said, and I want you got your

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Speaker 3: opinions on this, since you guys are married, she said,

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Speaker 3: I go riddle me this doc I find. I go,

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Speaker 3: you haven't known me for very long.

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Speaker 4: Can you imagine I cannot imagine being your therapist?

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Speaker 3: I said, I'm not one of I'm not a monkey brancher.

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Speaker 3: I don't need to go from a relationship to relationship

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Speaker 3: like I'm cool being single. And I was like, you're

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Speaker 3: telling me. I was like, I dated a lot of

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Speaker 3: people and I've been waiting my whole life to find

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Speaker 3: a love like I had in this past relationship. You're

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Speaker 3: telling me I'm just supposed to walk away and let

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Speaker 3: it go, and she goes, it's not my job to

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Speaker 3: tell you to walk away or to let go of anything.

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Speaker 3: I'm just asking why you're so closed off, because she goes,

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Speaker 3: I think that you're a dream partner for a lot

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Speaker 3: of people. And I think you could find somebody that

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Speaker 3: you are the love of his life and you'll still

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Speaker 3: love him a great deal. It's not settling. A lot

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Speaker 3: of people don't end up with the love of their life.

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Speaker 4: And I was like, what, yeah, but I think you're

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Speaker 4: really holding on to the in Red Star might be

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Speaker 4: the love of your life. But I also think you

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Speaker 4: could have a relationship with someone else and it changed

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Speaker 4: everything and you realize that wasn't the love of my life.

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Speaker 3: But that phrase of not everybody ends up like and

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Speaker 3: then I started thinking. I was like, thinking about it,

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Speaker 3: It's like, you know, people, she said, people pass away,

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Speaker 3: people have to move across the country for work, and

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Speaker 3: like things happen and what are you just not gonna

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Speaker 3: carry on? And I was like, make a point.

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Speaker 4: I know, but I think you're you're going into the

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Speaker 4: next potential relationship dating thinking that you won't ever feel

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Speaker 4: the feelings you feel for Red Star, which I think.

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Speaker 4: I think you can, and I think you will. And

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Speaker 4: I think the most important thing is that that that's reciprocated.

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Speaker 3: Maybe that's where she's trying, Maybe that's where she's trying

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Speaker 3: to get me. But in my mind, I was like

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Speaker 3: so fixated on the on the other part of it,

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Speaker 3: and I was like, do a lot of people not

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Speaker 3: end up with the love of their lives like you

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Speaker 3: markis and you guys are married. Do you think you're

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Speaker 3: with the loves of your life?

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Speaker 1: Absolutely? And I felt that way since very early on,

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Speaker 1: and that feeling has only gotten stronger over the past

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Speaker 1: couple of decades. It's really amazing how your love for

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Speaker 1: someone can grow stronger and deeper over the years. No question,

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Speaker 1: she's the love of my life.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, we've had that conversation before. We think we are

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Speaker 6: with one of the loves of our lives.

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Speaker 2: You know, I think too.

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Speaker 6: You know, I just feel like mathematically, there's got to

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Speaker 6: be many more people that we're compatible with, you know.

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Speaker 6: But like, obviously I would love to go to my

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Speaker 6: grave holding Alison's hand, But we did have the conversation.

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Speaker 6: Should something happen, we'd both be okay with the other

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Speaker 6: one just moving on and finding someone else.

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Speaker 7: That's a sad conversation, you know it is, but but

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Speaker 7: it's it's something that we felt like a lot of

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Speaker 7: people don't have, and and like, what if something horrible

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Speaker 7: happened tomorrow, you know, I'd like to know.

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Speaker 6: That I had Alison's blessing to get back on the horse,

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Speaker 6: you know, not that i'd be able to, of course,

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Speaker 6: i'd be I'd be in mourning. I'd be just terribly depressed,

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Speaker 6: but eventually, you know, I mean, hey, got my whole

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Speaker 6: life out of me.

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Speaker 8: Yeah, it's true though, Like I I my the hopeless

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Speaker 8: romantic part of my brain goes like, how can you

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Speaker 8: ever find a love?

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Speaker 4: How could you ever find more than one? Like loves

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Speaker 4: of your life? But in my mind, I'm like, I

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Speaker 4: found one. I think I found one that I'm with

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Speaker 4: right now, and it's like, should something happen, do I.

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Speaker 3: Think I could find another?

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Speaker 4: And it might be totally different, but it's still I

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Speaker 4: would consider them the love of my one of, you know,

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Speaker 4: one of the kind of And.

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Speaker 3: That's what I mean. Maybe that's what she was getting

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Speaker 3: at because she was like, you the love like because

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Speaker 3: I was like, oh, so I'm supposed to settle, you know,

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Speaker 3: you know me, I get all in my like you

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Speaker 3: know whatever, and she's like, it's not settling you, Like

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Speaker 3: you will have a very deep, deep love and like

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Speaker 3: it'll be different, it'll just be a different kind. And

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Speaker 3: I was like, who.

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Speaker 4: Did you feel like your big breakup before this one?

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Speaker 4: Did you feel like he was the love of your life?

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Speaker 1: No?

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Speaker 4: So this is the first time you this was your

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Speaker 4: first relationship since then.

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Speaker 1: Wait not the one from seven years ago?

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Speaker 3: Correct?

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Speaker 4: Yeah you did not, No, I didn't, But I'm saying

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Speaker 4: this was her first serious relationship since then. So comparing

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Speaker 4: the feelings and how much you've grown as a human being,

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Speaker 4: felt way more significant in the effort, in the what

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Speaker 4: you gave into this relationshipeah.

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Speaker 3: And I also think just because I have dated so much,

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Speaker 3: you know what I mean, and like felt all the things,

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Speaker 3: like every color of the rainbow, it's just like so

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Speaker 3: different and just felt so significant, you know. But it

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Speaker 3: was it was a whiplash conversation, like she got she

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Speaker 3: really got through to me that day, and like guess what.

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Speaker 3: I was like, you know what, this feels weird and

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Speaker 3: this feels scary and I lean leaned into it and

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Speaker 3: it's like, you know, step on the other side of fear.

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Speaker 1: Here she goes, so clearly you're gonna call Adam Brody.

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Speaker 3: I don't know. I don't know about that, you.

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Speaker 1: Know, because when I suggested we do this as a

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Speaker 1: radio bit, you gave me a look like what an

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Speaker 1: asshole you did? And so, and I apologize if if

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Speaker 1: I came off that way as cold and calculating and

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Speaker 1: trying to produce this. But a stranger giving you a

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Speaker 1: phone number to ask you on a date who almost

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Speaker 1: hit you with a car, to me, that's a great bit,

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Speaker 1: but you're seeing it as potential.

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Speaker 2: Clearly she's seeing as a meat I just, yeah, be cute.

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Speaker 3: The butterfly really is like throwing me in a different direction.

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Speaker 3: And I also think that like I want to, like

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Speaker 3: I'm so in my head about everything that's going on

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Speaker 3: that like I don't want to put pressure on any

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Speaker 3: person in particular, do you know what I mean? I

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Speaker 3: just kind of want to like move through it.

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Speaker 1: And no, my thought of calling him on the radio

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Speaker 1: wasn't to set you guys up. It's more to interview

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Speaker 1: this guy who and and hear the story from his

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Speaker 1: side of it and how he wrote the note down.

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Speaker 1: So quickly and that sort of thing. If it turns

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Speaker 1: into something, fine, but that wouldn't be the idea of

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Speaker 1: the idea. Isn't this a funny thing that happened to me.

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Speaker 1: Let's pursue it. But you see this as there's potential here.

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Speaker 3: I don't know. I'm open, Okay.

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Speaker 4: I think maybe we go through our options of people

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Speaker 4: that we know and they feel safe.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't love it.

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Speaker 4: By the way, Also, like if you do it as

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Speaker 4: a bit, can you just be like have you ever

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Speaker 4: done this before?

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Speaker 5: Like do you?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, this is how you pick up women?

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Speaker 3: Like yeah, I know, but do you Becca? Do you

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Speaker 3: remember mister Wilsher?

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Speaker 2: Well, yeah, and then we you were talking to him

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Speaker 2: and gonna go hang out with him that.

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Speaker 3: Night that night day with hands with another woman on

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Speaker 3: this complete other side of town. That's what's like so

347
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Speaker 3: crazy about that. As he lives he lived where I

348
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Speaker 3: don't need to say where, but like Becka and I

349
00:17:39,880 --> 00:17:43,880
Speaker 3: were like basically in Arizona this day, like we're far

350
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Speaker 3: away having lunch, we were not closed, and outcomes mister

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Speaker 3: Wilsher holding hands with some chick the same day that

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Speaker 3: I'm supposed to meet him for dinner. That night.

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Speaker 2: It was uncozy, to say the least.

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Speaker 3: I couldn't even get words out, and I was just like,

355
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Speaker 3: and I don't even how did you know with him?

356
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Speaker 4: I just knew I felt your I felt it, and

357
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Speaker 4: I remembered you described him to me, and I was

358
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Speaker 4: just like, oh my gosh, this is the guy that

359
00:18:11,800 --> 00:18:14,000
Speaker 4: she's supposed to see tonight and he's walking with another

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Speaker 4: woman holding.

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Speaker 3: Hand, holding hands intimately.

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Speaker 2: Because they were interlocked, or.

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Speaker 4: It wasn't a friendly handhold, no, like you do with

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Speaker 4: or with a child. It was more it was like,

365
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Speaker 4: this isn't my sexual tension handhold?

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Speaker 3: Yeah? Yeah, yeah, Well so I'm like, you know, that

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Speaker 3: wasn't great. That didn't leave a great taste in them

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Speaker 3: meeting somebody in a car mouth of mine.

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Speaker 1: And yet there we are, we are, and.

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Speaker 4: Yet we went from I don't know if if I'll

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Speaker 4: do it too, I might do it.

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Speaker 1: I got to look at death, so I think she's

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Speaker 1: doing it.

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Speaker 2: She said, Dad, Now, lay off.

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Speaker 3: My heart has been through the wringer, and I just

376
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Speaker 3: needed to just not I just need to not mess

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Speaker 3: with it right now.

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Speaker 2: That's what you gotta do. You gotta do what you

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Speaker 2: gotta do.

380
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Speaker 3: You gotta do what you gotta do.

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Speaker 2: I feel like there was something else I was gonna

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Speaker 2: talk to you about.

383
00:19:18,720 --> 00:19:19,639
Speaker 3: The Amazing Race.

384
00:19:20,359 --> 00:19:23,440
Speaker 4: Yes, Amazing Race. We're gonna take a break and we'll

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Speaker 4: be right back. All right, we are back. And so Tanya, Okay,

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Speaker 4: I've talked about this already, but I recently, within the

387
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Speaker 4: last few months, started watching Amazing Race for the first

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Speaker 4: time ever.

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Speaker 2: Like, I've never watched it. I've never had any interest

390
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Speaker 2: in it.

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Speaker 4: And then my sister and her girlfriend were like talking

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Speaker 4: about how they were really into it, and they were thinking,

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Speaker 4: like they were like, one day we want to go

394
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Speaker 4: on the show, which they would be epic on it,

395
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Speaker 4: so that'd be cool. And so I've been talking about

396
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Speaker 4: this and Tanya, I don't even think Tanya.

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Speaker 3: I know you've been talking about it. I've never seen

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Speaker 3: a single episode of Amazing Race.

399
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Speaker 4: Hello, okay, But I had never seen an episode, but

400
00:20:14,080 --> 00:20:15,760
Speaker 4: I knew the concept of it, and.

401
00:20:15,720 --> 00:20:17,359
Speaker 3: So there was like a race. But to me, I

402
00:20:17,359 --> 00:20:19,880
Speaker 3: thought it was like, what's the show wipe Out?

403
00:20:21,840 --> 00:20:24,120
Speaker 2: Also would have loved to have been on wipe Out?

404
00:20:24,280 --> 00:20:25,400
Speaker 3: Is it not like Wipeout?

405
00:20:25,520 --> 00:20:29,240
Speaker 2: No, very It's a lot more intellectual than what Oh

406
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Speaker 2: so Okay.

407
00:20:29,800 --> 00:20:32,960
Speaker 3: So I get a DM from somebody and it was

408
00:20:33,000 --> 00:20:35,800
Speaker 3: like lengthy, but the very end he said, PS love

409
00:20:35,840 --> 00:20:41,040
Speaker 3: the podcast. I think you and Becca would crush it.

410
00:20:41,080 --> 00:20:43,359
Speaker 3: I don't know if you've ever thought about doing Amazing Race.

411
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Speaker 3: And so I screenshot it and I sent it to

412
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Speaker 3: Becca because I was like, this is the show she watches.

413
00:20:47,160 --> 00:20:50,000
Speaker 3: I was like, is this something that like normal people do?

414
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Speaker 3: Like I didn't you know, like can we do this?

415
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Speaker 3: And what did you say?

416
00:20:55,720 --> 00:20:59,119
Speaker 4: I said, it would be an absolute disaster. We'd be

417
00:20:59,200 --> 00:21:03,000
Speaker 4: gone within one the episode. It's like, literally, you don't

418
00:21:03,000 --> 00:21:05,359
Speaker 4: have a phone, you don't have AX, you have to

419
00:21:05,440 --> 00:21:09,359
Speaker 4: literally ask for help and directions, and then you have

420
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Speaker 4: to compete and where are.

421
00:21:10,600 --> 00:21:12,879
Speaker 3: You supposed to go? Well, so they need to go.

422
00:21:13,000 --> 00:21:15,440
Speaker 2: You get a clue and they're like, take.

423
00:21:15,920 --> 00:21:17,840
Speaker 3: Where do we talk here in Studio City?

424
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Speaker 4: They start all over the all over the but yeah,

425
00:21:21,600 --> 00:21:25,000
Speaker 4: well yeah they start somewhere in America and then they

426
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Speaker 4: finish in America. And so you start and they're like

427
00:21:29,600 --> 00:21:32,480
Speaker 4: they count down, they introduce all the all the contestants,

428
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Speaker 4: and then they're like.

429
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Speaker 3: And you're in teams, yeah, search for a.

430
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Speaker 2: Clue until you go find the clue and then you open.

431
00:21:37,440 --> 00:21:40,120
Speaker 4: The clue and it's like, take this Ford fiesta. Ford

432
00:21:40,240 --> 00:21:42,600
Speaker 4: is like their big sponsor, Take this sport fiesta and

433
00:21:42,720 --> 00:21:45,080
Speaker 4: drive to the airport and book a flight to Morocco.

434
00:21:45,480 --> 00:21:47,480
Speaker 4: And so you have to get to the airport, find

435
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Speaker 4: the quickest flight to Morocco.

436
00:21:49,320 --> 00:21:52,440
Speaker 3: The problem just zip right over to lax. What's the visue?

437
00:21:52,800 --> 00:21:54,880
Speaker 1: All right, Well, you're in a race with ten other

438
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Speaker 1: couples and then you get to Morocco.

439
00:21:56,680 --> 00:21:57,840
Speaker 3: Everybody has the same clue.

440
00:21:58,000 --> 00:22:02,720
Speaker 4: Yeah, So then you get ram on the car.

441
00:22:02,640 --> 00:22:05,919
Speaker 2: Going like sixty the freeway I would be driving.

442
00:22:06,080 --> 00:22:09,000
Speaker 1: Definitely, only three couples can get on the one o'clock flight,

443
00:22:09,040 --> 00:22:10,840
Speaker 1: and then five couples get down the two o'clock flight.

444
00:22:10,880 --> 00:22:12,960
Speaker 1: Noverbody else gets on the three o'clock flight. So you

445
00:22:13,000 --> 00:22:14,399
Speaker 1: got a race to the airport. And then when you

446
00:22:14,400 --> 00:22:16,000
Speaker 1: get to the airport in Morocco, and then some flights

447
00:22:16,040 --> 00:22:18,280
Speaker 1: are delayed, and then there's all that craziness. Then you

448
00:22:18,320 --> 00:22:19,680
Speaker 1: get to Morocco when you get a new clue that

449
00:22:19,720 --> 00:22:21,400
Speaker 1: says find this statue somewhere, and you.

450
00:22:21,320 --> 00:22:23,560
Speaker 3: Go like, if you get on the later flight, do

451
00:22:23,560 --> 00:22:25,200
Speaker 3: you just you're automatically.

452
00:22:24,640 --> 00:22:26,800
Speaker 2: Like out, well, no, you're just behind. So like if

453
00:22:26,800 --> 00:22:27,080
Speaker 2: you have.

454
00:22:27,040 --> 00:22:29,160
Speaker 3: To go all the way to the rate at the end?

455
00:22:29,240 --> 00:22:33,040
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, So how many days is this race?

456
00:22:33,680 --> 00:22:35,080
Speaker 1: It's like a month around the world.

457
00:22:35,359 --> 00:22:37,560
Speaker 4: It's like a month. Yeah, they go, I'm telling you,

458
00:22:37,600 --> 00:22:40,240
Speaker 4: like around the world. It's not just like a quick

459
00:22:40,280 --> 00:22:42,000
Speaker 4: little Arizona, right.

460
00:22:42,680 --> 00:22:44,520
Speaker 3: This is like some sort of like you know, whip

461
00:22:44,600 --> 00:22:46,760
Speaker 3: blat or not. It wasn't wipe out show. We could

462
00:22:46,800 --> 00:22:48,200
Speaker 3: talk like we could totally do that.

463
00:22:48,359 --> 00:22:49,520
Speaker 2: She was so confident.

464
00:22:49,560 --> 00:22:52,280
Speaker 4: As I'm watching and I I literally every day that

465
00:22:52,359 --> 00:22:55,800
Speaker 4: I watch, I'm thinking, who could I compete? Who could

466
00:22:55,840 --> 00:22:58,320
Speaker 4: be my teammate on this? And when like who could

467
00:22:58,320 --> 00:23:00,439
Speaker 4: I do this with me?

468
00:23:01,000 --> 00:23:01,160
Speaker 3: No?

469
00:23:01,160 --> 00:23:03,320
Speaker 2: No, no, we want it. You don't even you don't

470
00:23:03,320 --> 00:23:06,679
Speaker 2: even know what it is. Mark, you would actually be

471
00:23:06,760 --> 00:23:07,879
Speaker 2: a good I.

472
00:23:07,920 --> 00:23:09,639
Speaker 1: Think I would be. And it's and my wife and

473
00:23:09,680 --> 00:23:11,520
Speaker 1: I've always said if this one reality show we would

474
00:23:11,520 --> 00:23:13,199
Speaker 1: go on in a heartbeat. Is the amazing race. We

475
00:23:13,240 --> 00:23:15,960
Speaker 1: watched like the first I don't know, twenty seasons of

476
00:23:16,000 --> 00:23:17,679
Speaker 1: it and then we kind of bailed because it was

477
00:23:17,680 --> 00:23:20,880
Speaker 1: getting a little repetitive. But uh, it's a great show

478
00:23:20,920 --> 00:23:22,639
Speaker 1: and it's a great concept, and I'd love to do it.

479
00:23:22,680 --> 00:23:24,359
Speaker 1: And I think if you two wanted to do it,

480
00:23:24,400 --> 00:23:26,040
Speaker 1: you'd be on in a heartbeat because you got the

481
00:23:26,040 --> 00:23:28,320
Speaker 1: bachelor thing going on, you got the seacrest angle they

482
00:23:28,359 --> 00:23:29,000
Speaker 1: would take you to.

483
00:23:29,800 --> 00:23:32,080
Speaker 4: I know it feels like it makes me very so

484
00:23:32,359 --> 00:23:34,320
Speaker 4: bummed to be out within two.

485
00:23:34,200 --> 00:23:38,760
Speaker 2: Seconds, and I just know I resent that.

486
00:23:38,840 --> 00:23:41,480
Speaker 3: What do you have a bad scavenger hunter?

487
00:23:42,320 --> 00:23:43,200
Speaker 2: That's the problem.

488
00:23:43,280 --> 00:23:46,640
Speaker 4: It's not a scavenger hunt, sound, it's a race, it's

489
00:23:46,680 --> 00:23:47,400
Speaker 4: a competition.

490
00:23:47,520 --> 00:23:49,200
Speaker 3: It's like an easter egg hunt.

491
00:23:49,720 --> 00:23:51,760
Speaker 2: Well, maybe if you went in with that mentality, we

492
00:23:51,840 --> 00:23:52,600
Speaker 2: might have a chance.

493
00:23:52,680 --> 00:23:55,119
Speaker 4: If you just think of it as it easy around

494
00:23:55,160 --> 00:23:59,080
Speaker 4: the world easter egg hunt with some task in.

495
00:24:00,119 --> 00:24:02,920
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, do you just have like a backpack and yeah, you're.

496
00:24:02,760 --> 00:24:06,359
Speaker 4: Like literally they're like traveling in the same clothes that

497
00:24:06,400 --> 00:24:08,920
Speaker 4: they just competed in. They'll like hop on a That's

498
00:24:08,920 --> 00:24:10,960
Speaker 4: what I'm mostly stressed about is the lack of sleep

499
00:24:11,000 --> 00:24:12,080
Speaker 4: and the lack of showering.

500
00:24:12,240 --> 00:24:14,320
Speaker 3: Yeah, do you like what if you're in your period.

501
00:24:14,680 --> 00:24:22,320
Speaker 4: You better have that flex cup in. Honestly, that would

502
00:24:22,359 --> 00:24:25,080
Speaker 4: be ideal. Like the earlier seasons, I don't know. The

503
00:24:25,160 --> 00:24:26,440
Speaker 4: earlier seasons.

504
00:24:26,080 --> 00:24:27,879
Speaker 2: Are crazy because they give me showers.

505
00:24:28,320 --> 00:24:30,280
Speaker 4: I mean a lot of times if they if there's

506
00:24:30,359 --> 00:24:32,560
Speaker 4: like a stop in the travel or whatever you say,

507
00:24:32,560 --> 00:24:35,080
Speaker 4: at a hotel, or they have mandatory rest times so

508
00:24:35,119 --> 00:24:36,240
Speaker 4: they make everyone.

509
00:24:35,960 --> 00:24:36,680
Speaker 3: Stop, right.

510
00:24:37,080 --> 00:24:38,880
Speaker 2: But yeah, it's it's pretty intense.

511
00:24:39,080 --> 00:24:42,600
Speaker 3: Well to the scrubber that suggested this clearly doesn't listen

512
00:24:42,640 --> 00:24:45,800
Speaker 3: well because it's not.

513
00:24:46,560 --> 00:24:49,520
Speaker 2: Thinking of entertainment, which we would be entertainment.

514
00:24:49,960 --> 00:24:52,199
Speaker 1: It's stressful. How do you think you two would react

515
00:24:52,320 --> 00:24:55,120
Speaker 1: under stress working together in a stressful situation.

516
00:24:55,880 --> 00:24:56,760
Speaker 3: I wouldn't like it.

517
00:24:57,119 --> 00:24:59,840
Speaker 4: No, I think you'll see a new side of Tanya

518
00:24:59,840 --> 00:25:02,080
Speaker 4: that you haven't seen. I would be pretty consistent with

519
00:25:02,160 --> 00:25:04,639
Speaker 4: like myself, and I would probably yell at tonya, but

520
00:25:04,680 --> 00:25:06,840
Speaker 4: I think she would yell back what y'all don't see.

521
00:25:07,080 --> 00:25:09,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't think i'd like it. I don't even

522
00:25:09,640 --> 00:25:11,760
Speaker 3: like I like, actually I like escape rooms, but like

523
00:25:11,760 --> 00:25:15,440
Speaker 3: when people get so into it and they're like, I'm like, oh,

524
00:25:17,520 --> 00:25:18,000
Speaker 3: would be.

525
00:25:17,920 --> 00:25:20,480
Speaker 1: The amazing race contest that flirts with a guy in

526
00:25:20,520 --> 00:25:23,879
Speaker 1: another couple and then you know, not a couple, couple.

527
00:25:24,440 --> 00:25:27,040
Speaker 2: Guys an alliance.

528
00:25:26,760 --> 00:25:28,679
Speaker 1: Form an alliance. That's what would happen for sure.

529
00:25:29,400 --> 00:25:34,080
Speaker 2: Oh that's not that could be that our ticket in

530
00:25:34,320 --> 00:25:34,880
Speaker 2: But what's it good.

531
00:25:34,880 --> 00:25:36,760
Speaker 3: And what's good with an alliance.

532
00:25:36,680 --> 00:25:38,760
Speaker 4: You help each other out, so like if if we

533
00:25:38,800 --> 00:25:41,160
Speaker 4: need a clue or like, they can help us get

534
00:25:41,200 --> 00:25:43,360
Speaker 4: it something to get to the next race, and.

535
00:25:43,280 --> 00:25:46,560
Speaker 2: Then you fall in love and then you're a millia

536
00:25:46,920 --> 00:25:49,640
Speaker 2: or like you have like half well probably taxes.

537
00:25:50,160 --> 00:25:53,399
Speaker 3: This sounds great. So anyway, what station is this on?

538
00:25:54,840 --> 00:25:59,920
Speaker 3: Is it NBC, CBS, CBS, CBS holler at you girls?

539
00:26:00,520 --> 00:26:02,720
Speaker 4: Yeah, well I don't know when they're going to be

540
00:26:02,760 --> 00:26:05,760
Speaker 4: doing amazing race with COVID times.

541
00:26:05,840 --> 00:26:10,840
Speaker 1: But uh, speaking of TV shows, I have been inundated

542
00:26:11,160 --> 00:26:14,720
Speaker 1: with direct messages on Facebook, on Instagram, on Twitter of

543
00:26:14,800 --> 00:26:18,280
Speaker 1: people who watched Derek Delgaudio's in and of itself. Becca

544
00:26:18,440 --> 00:26:21,000
Speaker 1: texted me we had a lovely conversation about what a great,

545
00:26:21,040 --> 00:26:23,199
Speaker 1: great show this was. Tanya told me she was going

546
00:26:23,280 --> 00:26:25,480
Speaker 1: to watch it. Then I never heard from her again,

547
00:26:25,560 --> 00:26:28,000
Speaker 1: so I have to assume she did not like it.

548
00:26:29,240 --> 00:26:32,720
Speaker 3: First of all, I didn't not like it. I loved it. Oh,

549
00:26:33,359 --> 00:26:35,720
Speaker 3: but I did not weep like I thought I was

550
00:26:35,760 --> 00:26:39,280
Speaker 3: going to weep. Okay, I definitely cried and it moved me,

551
00:26:40,240 --> 00:26:43,840
Speaker 3: but I wasn't like like I've I've been crying more

552
00:26:43,880 --> 00:26:44,760
Speaker 3: watching Virgin River.

553
00:26:46,320 --> 00:26:48,840
Speaker 1: Okay, now I would not cry at Virgin River, so

554
00:26:48,880 --> 00:26:50,719
Speaker 1: you know, to reach their own. But like you sent

555
00:26:50,800 --> 00:26:52,879
Speaker 1: me the text saying I'm watching it now, I was

556
00:26:53,000 --> 00:26:55,760
Speaker 1: watching the clock. An hour and a half later. I

557
00:26:55,800 --> 00:26:58,160
Speaker 1: was like, oh, she finished it. I should be hearing

558
00:26:58,240 --> 00:27:00,719
Speaker 1: any minute when she thought of it, and then nothing

559
00:27:01,080 --> 00:27:02,080
Speaker 1: for days.

560
00:27:03,040 --> 00:27:05,919
Speaker 2: She had to put on Virgin River because it was

561
00:27:05,960 --> 00:27:06,320
Speaker 2: like late.

562
00:27:06,400 --> 00:27:07,720
Speaker 3: I think I finished it like late, and then I

563
00:27:07,800 --> 00:27:08,480
Speaker 3: just like went to bed.

564
00:27:09,000 --> 00:27:12,000
Speaker 1: Okay, I just assume that you didn't like it. I

565
00:27:12,040 --> 00:27:13,800
Speaker 1: wasn't offended that you didn't tell me. I just assume

566
00:27:13,840 --> 00:27:15,600
Speaker 1: that might you know, nothing good to say about it,

567
00:27:15,640 --> 00:27:16,919
Speaker 1: But that's good. I'm glad you enjoyed it.

568
00:27:17,000 --> 00:27:17,840
Speaker 3: I did enjoy it.

569
00:27:18,640 --> 00:27:19,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, it was.

570
00:27:19,400 --> 00:27:22,600
Speaker 4: It was interesting because when it started there was this

571
00:27:23,560 --> 00:27:25,600
Speaker 4: sense of is this going to be scary?

572
00:27:26,119 --> 00:27:26,479
Speaker 3: Yeah.

573
00:27:26,520 --> 00:27:29,280
Speaker 4: The way it was shot, the music, he was very

574
00:27:29,720 --> 00:27:31,640
Speaker 4: he seemed like he was on the verge of tears

575
00:27:31,680 --> 00:27:36,080
Speaker 4: the whole movie to me or episode whatever. Yes, like

576
00:27:36,480 --> 00:27:38,399
Speaker 4: every point I was like, oh, this is about to

577
00:27:38,440 --> 00:27:43,760
Speaker 4: be emotional, and so I was just the magic aspect

578
00:27:43,800 --> 00:27:44,240
Speaker 4: of it was.

579
00:27:45,200 --> 00:27:47,560
Speaker 2: I still don't understand what happened.

580
00:27:48,119 --> 00:27:50,720
Speaker 1: But the interesting thing is when I watched a magic show.

581
00:27:51,320 --> 00:27:52,919
Speaker 1: I try to think of how they did it, and

582
00:27:52,960 --> 00:27:54,680
Speaker 1: I want to know how they did it, And this one,

583
00:27:54,720 --> 00:27:56,280
Speaker 1: I do not want to know how they did it,

584
00:27:56,359 --> 00:27:58,320
Speaker 1: especially the end I have. I do not want to

585
00:27:58,359 --> 00:28:00,840
Speaker 1: know how any of that was done because I'm baffled,

586
00:28:01,040 --> 00:28:02,600
Speaker 1: but happily baffled.

587
00:28:03,119 --> 00:28:05,320
Speaker 3: Yeah, it was pretty incredible, And I do like how

588
00:28:05,359 --> 00:28:08,320
Speaker 3: they like cut to like it was multiple shows, you

589
00:28:08,320 --> 00:28:09,760
Speaker 3: know what I mean, Like it was like, Okay, you're

590
00:28:09,800 --> 00:28:12,080
Speaker 3: the whatever, and then like it just took all the

591
00:28:12,119 --> 00:28:14,359
Speaker 3: different people. Like I do like that too. That's not

592
00:28:14,400 --> 00:28:18,520
Speaker 3: just like one yeah show, It's like multiples that they've

593
00:28:18,520 --> 00:28:19,360
Speaker 3: obviously filmed.

594
00:28:19,680 --> 00:28:23,760
Speaker 4: I just it was so fascinating because and I think

595
00:28:23,800 --> 00:28:26,879
Speaker 4: everyone probably takes when you watch something like that, I

596
00:28:26,880 --> 00:28:31,000
Speaker 4: think everyone probably takes away something from it. Different has

597
00:28:31,040 --> 00:28:34,600
Speaker 4: like a different perspective or what they got out of it.

598
00:28:34,680 --> 00:28:39,480
Speaker 4: And I think because I have been really focused recently

599
00:28:39,560 --> 00:28:42,680
Speaker 4: on like my identity and what I believe and who

600
00:28:42,720 --> 00:28:45,680
Speaker 4: I am and who you know, what I was taught

601
00:28:45,760 --> 00:28:48,720
Speaker 4: versus what I'm learning now, It's like I took away

602
00:28:48,840 --> 00:28:51,560
Speaker 4: so much of how much of our identity and how

603
00:28:51,600 --> 00:28:55,560
Speaker 4: people view us is based on just what we see

604
00:28:55,680 --> 00:28:59,760
Speaker 4: or like like political beliefs or religious beliefs, and like

605
00:28:59,800 --> 00:29:05,200
Speaker 4: we tacked that on beyond without even like going beyond

606
00:29:05,200 --> 00:29:08,880
Speaker 4: the surface. And it really made me realize how when

607
00:29:08,920 --> 00:29:11,920
Speaker 4: he said something about the like we're all born pure,

608
00:29:12,200 --> 00:29:16,520
Speaker 4: we don't have any preconceived ideas of what we believe

609
00:29:16,800 --> 00:29:18,880
Speaker 4: or what we're going to become. Like we're all in

610
00:29:18,920 --> 00:29:22,840
Speaker 4: the same page when we're born. That like really hit

611
00:29:22,920 --> 00:29:27,520
Speaker 4: me because we're all just like this innocent being coming

612
00:29:27,560 --> 00:29:28,160
Speaker 4: into the world.

613
00:29:28,560 --> 00:29:31,560
Speaker 3: You Know what really hit me is because for some reason,

614
00:29:31,600 --> 00:29:33,880
Speaker 3: I don't know why I did this in the very

615
00:29:33,920 --> 00:29:35,960
Speaker 3: beginning of my career. I think I was like so

616
00:29:36,160 --> 00:29:39,720
Speaker 3: scarred because of how I started in this career and

617
00:29:39,800 --> 00:29:42,360
Speaker 3: like you know, the lack of faith in me and

618
00:29:42,400 --> 00:29:45,560
Speaker 3: the like it was just like I wasn't welcomed with

619
00:29:45,600 --> 00:29:47,760
Speaker 3: open arms, you know what I mean. So I never

620
00:29:47,840 --> 00:29:49,960
Speaker 3: put like kiss FM or on air with Ryan or

621
00:29:49,960 --> 00:29:52,600
Speaker 3: any of that stuff on my like Instagram bio because

622
00:29:53,520 --> 00:29:57,880
Speaker 3: I was so like, I mean, mar Mark laughs, because

623
00:29:57,880 --> 00:29:58,560
Speaker 3: it's like you've known me.

624
00:29:58,480 --> 00:30:00,640
Speaker 1: The longest, You're saying.

625
00:30:00,520 --> 00:30:03,000
Speaker 3: Yes, yeah. So for some reason, I just like never

626
00:30:03,080 --> 00:30:05,640
Speaker 3: did that. I just kept my bio just like about me,

627
00:30:05,840 --> 00:30:08,440
Speaker 3: like as Tanya. You know, so it's just like modern

628
00:30:08,480 --> 00:30:12,840
Speaker 3: woman smile always, you know whatever. And it's interesting because

629
00:30:13,040 --> 00:30:16,240
Speaker 3: I remember I had a friend who worked in radio

630
00:30:16,320 --> 00:30:19,520
Speaker 3: and she was so attached to kiss FM and her

631
00:30:19,640 --> 00:30:21,280
Speaker 3: job and like that was all over her bio and

632
00:30:21,320 --> 00:30:24,560
Speaker 3: that's like what's her identity, And when she lost that job,

633
00:30:25,440 --> 00:30:28,720
Speaker 3: it was such this like you kind of have like

634
00:30:28,760 --> 00:30:31,160
Speaker 3: an identity crisis, you know, because it's like you don't

635
00:30:31,160 --> 00:30:33,840
Speaker 3: know what you are outside of that job. And like

636
00:30:33,920 --> 00:30:36,440
Speaker 3: this document or this was a documentary or the show

637
00:30:36,520 --> 00:30:36,960
Speaker 3: whatever it.

638
00:30:36,920 --> 00:30:38,920
Speaker 1: Was what you'd call it, but yeah, sure, either, whatever

639
00:30:38,960 --> 00:30:39,480
Speaker 1: you call it.

640
00:30:39,480 --> 00:30:42,520
Speaker 3: It was that that triggered that in me about how

641
00:30:42,560 --> 00:30:45,520
Speaker 3: we can so we can tie ourselves to like I

642
00:30:45,600 --> 00:30:47,920
Speaker 3: am a nurse or I am a this, and like

643
00:30:47,960 --> 00:30:50,600
Speaker 3: tie yourself to a profession or a career or a

644
00:30:50,840 --> 00:30:55,680
Speaker 3: specific company. And it's like really dangerous to do that

645
00:30:55,880 --> 00:30:58,160
Speaker 3: because you have no control in that, and like when

646
00:30:58,200 --> 00:31:00,960
Speaker 3: you wrap your identity into something like that, it can

647
00:31:01,000 --> 00:31:03,120
Speaker 3: be really damaging if it goes away.

648
00:31:03,360 --> 00:31:07,200
Speaker 1: It's true, but for some people, nurse is who they are,

649
00:31:07,360 --> 00:31:09,680
Speaker 1: a teacher is who they are. But I see, I

650
00:31:09,720 --> 00:31:10,640
Speaker 1: see where you're pointing.

651
00:31:10,760 --> 00:31:12,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, maybe not like the best examples that I'm using,

652
00:31:12,840 --> 00:31:14,880
Speaker 3: but like I don't know, like I for me, it

653
00:31:14,960 --> 00:31:18,600
Speaker 3: was always something that I I never attached myself to

654
00:31:18,880 --> 00:31:22,320
Speaker 3: because of the way that I started in the industry.

655
00:31:22,840 --> 00:31:25,240
Speaker 3: I probably had I not been, had it not been

656
00:31:25,240 --> 00:31:27,600
Speaker 3: so rocky for me, I probably would have had it

657
00:31:27,680 --> 00:31:29,719
Speaker 3: splatter all over every you know what I mean, like

658
00:31:30,160 --> 00:31:33,200
Speaker 3: on air with Ryan Seacrest from six to ten am weekdays,

659
00:31:33,240 --> 00:31:36,160
Speaker 3: and the vibe and scrubbing in from this and that,

660
00:31:36,320 --> 00:31:37,320
Speaker 3: like you know what I mean, Like I would have

661
00:31:37,320 --> 00:31:39,720
Speaker 3: been that would have been all over my stuff, And

662
00:31:39,760 --> 00:31:43,560
Speaker 3: I was so uh it was just such a thing

663
00:31:43,600 --> 00:31:46,360
Speaker 3: for me, And I'm like so glad that I never

664
00:31:46,480 --> 00:31:49,840
Speaker 3: did that, especially after this happened to my friend and

665
00:31:49,880 --> 00:31:51,840
Speaker 3: I like watched it happen in front of my eyes.

666
00:31:51,880 --> 00:31:56,440
Speaker 3: I was like, whoa, yeah, so what would.

667
00:31:56,160 --> 00:31:58,360
Speaker 1: You guys pick? So, just if you haven't seen the

668
00:31:58,400 --> 00:32:00,280
Speaker 1: show outs on Hulu, Derek De'll go do. He was

669
00:32:00,280 --> 00:32:02,000
Speaker 1: in and of itself. When the audience arrives at this

670
00:32:02,040 --> 00:32:04,440
Speaker 1: live show, their face with a wall of little slips

671
00:32:04,440 --> 00:32:07,440
Speaker 1: of paper, they all say, I am something, and some

672
00:32:07,480 --> 00:32:11,560
Speaker 1: of them are jobs, some of them are not. One

673
00:32:11,600 --> 00:32:16,360
Speaker 1: was the part of party. Yes, some of them were sad,

674
00:32:16,480 --> 00:32:20,400
Speaker 1: I am an artist, I am the life of the party,

675
00:32:20,440 --> 00:32:22,479
Speaker 1: I am the one that got away. I am a loner,

676
00:32:22,640 --> 00:32:27,560
Speaker 1: I am nobody. But some of them were, Yeah, anyway,

677
00:32:28,640 --> 00:32:30,840
Speaker 1: what would you choose if you saw that infinite wall

678
00:32:30,880 --> 00:32:32,600
Speaker 1: of these I ams? What is you? How do you

679
00:32:32,640 --> 00:32:33,520
Speaker 1: finish that sentence?

680
00:32:36,680 --> 00:32:37,120
Speaker 2: I don't know.

681
00:32:37,200 --> 00:32:40,920
Speaker 4: I had this conversation and I said, I said, I'm

682
00:32:40,920 --> 00:32:44,719
Speaker 4: an impath because I feel like that right now is

683
00:32:44,760 --> 00:32:48,960
Speaker 4: like really something that's on my mind of like taking

684
00:32:49,000 --> 00:32:53,800
Speaker 4: on other It's not necessarily something that I love, but

685
00:32:54,040 --> 00:32:55,560
Speaker 4: I do feel like it is who I am and

686
00:32:55,600 --> 00:32:59,920
Speaker 4: something I'm working on. But like taking on people's expectations,

687
00:33:00,080 --> 00:33:04,000
Speaker 4: their feelings and their emotions, I feel like I do

688
00:33:04,120 --> 00:33:04,560
Speaker 4: that a lot.

689
00:33:04,760 --> 00:33:08,680
Speaker 3: So I said that I love that you're an Empathough,

690
00:33:08,720 --> 00:33:11,080
Speaker 3: I think I know it has pro I know it all.

691
00:33:11,120 --> 00:33:17,040
Speaker 3: They all have their programs. I would say, I'm hopeful. Okay,

692
00:33:17,520 --> 00:33:19,200
Speaker 3: all right, is that is that?

693
00:33:19,560 --> 00:33:21,960
Speaker 1: I think that's I think that's exactly yeah.

694
00:33:21,800 --> 00:33:22,920
Speaker 3: Or like I'm an optimist.

695
00:33:23,160 --> 00:33:23,560
Speaker 1: That's good.

696
00:33:23,640 --> 00:33:26,800
Speaker 6: Yeah, Okay, I just want to be upfront with you.

697
00:33:26,840 --> 00:33:28,360
Speaker 6: I have not watched this yet.

698
00:33:28,720 --> 00:33:31,040
Speaker 1: That's okay. I'm hoping you can understand what we're trying

699
00:33:31,080 --> 00:33:31,640
Speaker 1: to go for here.

700
00:33:31,760 --> 00:33:34,520
Speaker 6: We've been talking about watching it, but everyone says they

701
00:33:34,560 --> 00:33:36,200
Speaker 6: cry during it, and Allison and I've been trying to

702
00:33:36,200 --> 00:33:37,160
Speaker 6: find a good night to cry.

703
00:33:37,240 --> 00:33:37,560
Speaker 3: So we have.

704
00:33:37,680 --> 00:33:40,560
Speaker 1: Well Tanya didn't, or maybe a little, but yeah, I.

705
00:33:40,520 --> 00:33:42,760
Speaker 3: Had some tears. I wasn't like weepy.

706
00:33:42,920 --> 00:33:46,920
Speaker 1: Like it's basically, what is your true identity? I am what?

707
00:33:47,720 --> 00:33:51,160
Speaker 6: I'm a pal. I want everyone to get along, like

708
00:33:51,240 --> 00:33:52,440
Speaker 6: being around people. I'm a pal.

709
00:33:52,560 --> 00:33:53,720
Speaker 3: That's cute. I like that.

710
00:33:53,960 --> 00:33:55,680
Speaker 2: Yeah, what's yours? Mark?

711
00:33:55,920 --> 00:33:57,720
Speaker 1: I don't know. I go back and forth and a bunch.

712
00:33:57,760 --> 00:34:01,040
Speaker 1: I like optimist because I am an optimist, always an optimist.

713
00:34:01,400 --> 00:34:03,560
Speaker 1: I am a dad. I don't think there's any you know.

714
00:34:03,600 --> 00:34:06,160
Speaker 1: That one does seem kind of true, although to me

715
00:34:06,240 --> 00:34:09,440
Speaker 1: it's only been fourteen years. It's been a fraction of

716
00:34:09,480 --> 00:34:11,040
Speaker 1: my life. I don't feel like I was a dad

717
00:34:11,080 --> 00:34:11,640
Speaker 1: before that.

718
00:34:12,440 --> 00:34:14,479
Speaker 3: Well, you could be an optimistic dad.

719
00:34:14,719 --> 00:34:16,000
Speaker 1: Maybe I'm an optimistic dad.

720
00:34:16,120 --> 00:34:19,080
Speaker 3: Okay, no rules, there's no rules in this game.

721
00:34:20,480 --> 00:34:22,160
Speaker 1: Right, Yeah, okay, that's what I am.

722
00:34:22,280 --> 00:34:22,600
Speaker 3: Yeah.

723
00:34:22,800 --> 00:34:26,160
Speaker 4: I also liked he said at the very beginning. He says,

724
00:34:28,120 --> 00:34:30,439
Speaker 4: from a young age, we're asked what do you want

725
00:34:30,480 --> 00:34:33,680
Speaker 4: to be? And then once we grow up, it's what

726
00:34:33,680 --> 00:34:36,759
Speaker 4: do you do? And I thought that was so fascinating

727
00:34:36,800 --> 00:34:39,600
Speaker 4: that we do put so much when we meet people

728
00:34:39,680 --> 00:34:41,640
Speaker 4: it is like, well, what do you do? Or you know,

729
00:34:41,719 --> 00:34:44,440
Speaker 4: like we always are wanting to know like your accomplishments

730
00:34:44,600 --> 00:34:48,360
Speaker 4: or what you've succeeded in. And although it's like something

731
00:34:48,600 --> 00:34:50,880
Speaker 4: of course to be proud of when you've reached success

732
00:34:50,880 --> 00:34:53,359
Speaker 4: in milestones, but we do put so much of our

733
00:34:53,400 --> 00:34:56,080
Speaker 4: identity in that that that was kind of an eye

734
00:34:56,120 --> 00:34:58,319
Speaker 4: opening moment too, of like our whole life is kind

735
00:34:58,320 --> 00:35:02,080
Speaker 4: of spent with people asked what have we accomplished?

736
00:35:02,280 --> 00:35:06,080
Speaker 2: Like what have we done in our lives? You know?

737
00:35:06,200 --> 00:35:09,560
Speaker 3: That makes me think of what Matthew Hussey always says

738
00:35:09,719 --> 00:35:12,839
Speaker 3: when like dating, He's like, it's not you shouldn't really

739
00:35:12,840 --> 00:35:15,319
Speaker 3: like he's like the asking of the what do you do?

740
00:35:15,440 --> 00:35:18,400
Speaker 3: It's like whatever, It's like why do you like what

741
00:35:18,480 --> 00:35:20,880
Speaker 3: you do? You know what I mean? Like what about

742
00:35:21,520 --> 00:35:24,280
Speaker 3: your job? What do you like about it? What keeps

743
00:35:24,280 --> 00:35:26,759
Speaker 3: you going in it? Like what's your day to day?

744
00:35:26,960 --> 00:35:29,000
Speaker 3: Like what you know what I mean? What excites you?

745
00:35:29,080 --> 00:35:30,959
Speaker 3: It's not so much what do you do? But it's

746
00:35:31,040 --> 00:35:33,560
Speaker 3: just like kind of getting to the why of what

747
00:35:33,600 --> 00:35:35,560
Speaker 3: you do what you do, you know, because like, okay,

748
00:35:35,640 --> 00:35:40,480
Speaker 3: I can say it's hard to like do examples that

749
00:35:40,520 --> 00:35:41,080
Speaker 3: are not you.

750
00:35:41,719 --> 00:35:45,319
Speaker 4: It's almost like you answer like, let's say someone has

751
00:35:45,320 --> 00:35:47,520
Speaker 4: a job and it's not their passionate job, it's not

752
00:35:47,560 --> 00:35:50,440
Speaker 4: like their dream job, but they're like, I do the

753
00:35:50,480 --> 00:35:52,680
Speaker 4: reason why I do this is so that I can

754
00:35:52,719 --> 00:35:54,960
Speaker 4: make money and have a lifestyle.

755
00:35:55,239 --> 00:35:58,160
Speaker 2: But what I'm passionate about is doing this.

756
00:35:58,280 --> 00:36:01,479
Speaker 4: And I do this job that I don't necessarily find

757
00:36:01,480 --> 00:36:03,200
Speaker 4: to be my dream job. I do that so that

758
00:36:03,239 --> 00:36:05,799
Speaker 4: I can do this. Yeah, And I think a lot

759
00:36:05,840 --> 00:36:09,080
Speaker 4: of times we go like, you know, even when we

760
00:36:09,160 --> 00:36:11,520
Speaker 4: talk about our friend's dating, it's like what does he do?

761
00:36:11,760 --> 00:36:13,239
Speaker 4: Like what do you do for a living? Yeah, it's

762
00:36:13,280 --> 00:36:16,440
Speaker 4: like who cares? Like does he love what he does?

763
00:36:16,520 --> 00:36:18,200
Speaker 4: Like is he passionate about what he does? Or what

764
00:36:18,200 --> 00:36:20,080
Speaker 4: are his passions outside of work?

765
00:36:20,400 --> 00:36:21,080
Speaker 3: Right?

766
00:36:21,120 --> 00:36:23,160
Speaker 1: So would what would you do if you could do anything?

767
00:36:23,160 --> 00:36:25,239
Speaker 1: Our paths of letters to this point, But what would

768
00:36:25,280 --> 00:36:26,840
Speaker 1: you do if you could do anything in the world?

769
00:36:28,760 --> 00:36:29,640
Speaker 3: Honestly think this?

770
00:36:30,200 --> 00:36:32,319
Speaker 2: I know I think I'm doing I think I'm doing

771
00:36:32,320 --> 00:36:34,799
Speaker 2: what Wow? Yeah, I think if I do?

772
00:36:34,880 --> 00:36:38,080
Speaker 4: Think if I had there's a lot of ifs in this,

773
00:36:38,239 --> 00:36:41,040
Speaker 4: but there is something about being in like and maybe

774
00:36:41,040 --> 00:36:42,880
Speaker 4: it's just my love for Gray's anatomy, but like the

775
00:36:42,960 --> 00:36:45,600
Speaker 4: idea of being able to help people and save people,

776
00:36:45,800 --> 00:36:52,200
Speaker 4: like having the intelligence to be a doctor or someone

777
00:36:52,239 --> 00:36:56,280
Speaker 4: that is like that, but I don't have the desire

778
00:36:56,320 --> 00:36:58,640
Speaker 4: to do the necessary requirements.

779
00:36:58,840 --> 00:37:03,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's because I recently met this guy and he

780
00:37:03,120 --> 00:37:06,800
Speaker 3: asked me, he goes, do you like being a public figure?

781
00:37:06,920 --> 00:37:09,400
Speaker 3: And I guess I forget. It's like I am, you know,

782
00:37:09,480 --> 00:37:11,000
Speaker 3: but you know, I don't, you know, you don't see

783
00:37:11,040 --> 00:37:14,800
Speaker 3: it like that. And I was like, it's an interesting

784
00:37:14,880 --> 00:37:17,120
Speaker 3: question because I don't see myself as a public figure

785
00:37:17,120 --> 00:37:19,320
Speaker 3: because it's like I see myself as like a big

786
00:37:19,360 --> 00:37:21,640
Speaker 3: sister almost, you know what I mean, Like I see

787
00:37:21,680 --> 00:37:24,719
Speaker 3: myself and like I don't. It feels like I have

788
00:37:24,840 --> 00:37:28,680
Speaker 3: this community of women and people that I get to

789
00:37:28,760 --> 00:37:32,239
Speaker 3: like engage with and have conversations with and relate to,

790
00:37:32,440 --> 00:37:37,120
Speaker 3: and it's just like this weird, like loving, beautiful community.

791
00:37:37,400 --> 00:37:42,239
Speaker 3: And I was like, yeah, I do. Yeah, but he

792
00:37:42,400 --> 00:37:44,160
Speaker 3: like I think it was like caught him off guards.

793
00:37:44,239 --> 00:37:47,040
Speaker 3: I think so, so you hear so many people being like, eh,

794
00:37:47,080 --> 00:37:49,640
Speaker 3: like it sucks because like everybody like bumps in at

795
00:37:49,680 --> 00:37:54,600
Speaker 3: your dad, you know. Na, It's like, no, it's actually

796
00:37:54,600 --> 00:37:57,160
Speaker 3: really awesome, and I feel very like purpose filled.

797
00:37:57,719 --> 00:37:59,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's interesting.

798
00:37:59,160 --> 00:38:03,000
Speaker 4: I mean I think there there's some days where it's

799
00:38:03,200 --> 00:38:05,239
Speaker 4: just like the greatest thing ever, and then there's days

800
00:38:05,280 --> 00:38:09,360
Speaker 4: where you get like troll messages and you're like that sucks.

801
00:38:09,440 --> 00:38:10,439
Speaker 2: You know, it doesn't feel good.

802
00:38:10,600 --> 00:38:12,319
Speaker 4: But like, for the most part, I think we both

803
00:38:12,360 --> 00:38:14,360
Speaker 4: have like really a really burn.

804
00:38:15,800 --> 00:38:16,879
Speaker 2: We have a great thing.

805
00:38:17,120 --> 00:38:20,040
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's actually really funny. I got like this d

806
00:38:20,080 --> 00:38:22,279
Speaker 3: group DM from some scrubbers and it was like three

807
00:38:22,320 --> 00:38:25,360
Speaker 3: girls and they cause I told you that there's like

808
00:38:25,440 --> 00:38:27,520
Speaker 3: this guy from my past that's like popping up, and

809
00:38:27,560 --> 00:38:29,480
Speaker 3: they like did some sleuthing, you know, the scrubbers like

810
00:38:29,520 --> 00:38:32,279
Speaker 3: do some sleuthing, and they like connected the dots on

811
00:38:32,360 --> 00:38:36,560
Speaker 3: Instagram somehow and basically send me this DM saying like,

812
00:38:36,960 --> 00:38:40,480
Speaker 3: you know, we saw this, blah blah blah, we're not

813
00:38:40,520 --> 00:38:42,480
Speaker 3: going to put in the Facebook group because we respect

814
00:38:42,520 --> 00:38:47,399
Speaker 3: your privacy. And then see if like we just want

815
00:38:47,400 --> 00:38:49,160
Speaker 3: you to be happy, so whatever makes you happy. And

816
00:38:49,200 --> 00:38:51,560
Speaker 3: I was like, not only does this bless my heart

817
00:38:51,600 --> 00:38:55,040
Speaker 3: because the level of sleuthing is so legit. But the

818
00:38:55,080 --> 00:38:57,440
Speaker 3: fact that they were like, we want to respect your privacy,

819
00:38:57,480 --> 00:38:59,040
Speaker 3: so we're not gonna do anything with it, and we

820
00:38:59,120 --> 00:39:00,960
Speaker 3: just want you to be happy. I just like, who

821
00:39:01,120 --> 00:39:04,319
Speaker 3: are you? People? Like you're amazing, you know, like it's

822
00:39:04,360 --> 00:39:05,200
Speaker 3: like so cool.

823
00:39:06,160 --> 00:39:11,319
Speaker 4: It's just our virtual bff. Yeah, yeah, it's really cool. Yeah.

824
00:39:11,360 --> 00:39:14,359
Speaker 4: But yeah, I really do appreciate that recommendation for that

825
00:39:14,400 --> 00:39:18,080
Speaker 4: movie because I don't think I would have ever watched it.

826
00:39:17,920 --> 00:39:20,600
Speaker 3: Without I agree never. I still had to, like I

827
00:39:20,640 --> 00:39:22,359
Speaker 3: had to ask Mark three times what it was called.

828
00:39:24,320 --> 00:39:26,439
Speaker 1: It doesn't flow, No, it's not. But I do feel

829
00:39:26,440 --> 00:39:27,880
Speaker 1: like it's starting to blow up a little bit now

830
00:39:27,880 --> 00:39:29,839
Speaker 1: people are really starting to find it good.

831
00:39:29,920 --> 00:39:30,960
Speaker 2: Yeah.

832
00:39:30,200 --> 00:39:34,040
Speaker 4: I really enjoyed it. Yeah, it was eye opening for

833
00:39:34,120 --> 00:39:35,200
Speaker 4: me personally.

834
00:39:36,640 --> 00:39:37,840
Speaker 3: Are you gonna watch the super Bowl?

835
00:39:38,840 --> 00:39:39,040
Speaker 8: Yeah?

836
00:39:39,160 --> 00:39:40,719
Speaker 3: Probably should be watched together.

837
00:39:41,320 --> 00:39:44,560
Speaker 1: Don't Tony. Did you buy any snacks or anything?

838
00:39:44,600 --> 00:39:47,040
Speaker 3: Yeah? So wait, So as of right now, I'm watching

839
00:39:47,040 --> 00:39:50,160
Speaker 3: the super Bowl with like one human, right, just one?

840
00:39:51,000 --> 00:39:51,360
Speaker 2: Is that me?

841
00:39:52,000 --> 00:39:54,720
Speaker 3: I'm not saying that if I would like to emerge,

842
00:39:54,760 --> 00:39:57,680
Speaker 3: so then it would be three. Okay, But so I

843
00:39:57,719 --> 00:39:59,520
Speaker 3: buy this because I'm like, I want to make it cute,

844
00:39:59,520 --> 00:40:01,239
Speaker 3: you know, like it's Super Bowl Like you know me,

845
00:40:01,320 --> 00:40:04,080
Speaker 3: I love a theme. So I ordered this thing to

846
00:40:04,120 --> 00:40:05,880
Speaker 3: make like one of those stadiums, you know, like all

847
00:40:05,880 --> 00:40:10,080
Speaker 3: the snacks, like so that I can put like sandwiches

848
00:40:10,120 --> 00:40:12,800
Speaker 3: around the outside and then like maybe pretzel.

849
00:40:12,800 --> 00:40:12,920
Speaker 4: You know.

850
00:40:12,960 --> 00:40:18,000
Speaker 3: It's like a stadium of snack stadium. So I order it.

851
00:40:19,000 --> 00:40:23,440
Speaker 3: I ordered a freaking basketball stadium and it has like

852
00:40:23,440 --> 00:40:25,520
Speaker 3: it says, like hoops on the side. It is like

853
00:40:25,560 --> 00:40:29,279
Speaker 3: a basketball court. And I'm just like, this is the

854
00:40:29,280 --> 00:40:34,080
Speaker 3: most Tanya thing ever, Like I can't even buy the

855
00:40:34,160 --> 00:40:36,239
Speaker 3: right game stadium.

856
00:40:36,800 --> 00:40:39,600
Speaker 2: I thought, though, Yeah, I'm still gonna use it.

857
00:40:39,680 --> 00:40:43,640
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, I think.

858
00:40:43,520 --> 00:40:46,120
Speaker 4: With your craft skills you can cover the at a

859
00:40:46,160 --> 00:40:47,800
Speaker 4: little goalpost or something.

860
00:40:47,880 --> 00:40:51,719
Speaker 3: Yeah. Maybe put a name of a team on the side. Yeah,

861
00:40:52,560 --> 00:40:57,040
Speaker 3: Tom Brady he played for Florida.

862
00:40:57,520 --> 00:40:59,560
Speaker 2: Okay, close, you almost there.

863
00:41:00,120 --> 00:41:00,880
Speaker 3: Kansas City.

864
00:41:01,280 --> 00:41:02,440
Speaker 2: That's one of the teams.

865
00:41:02,680 --> 00:41:05,200
Speaker 3: To both teams Florida Kansas City. Well, I don't know

866
00:41:05,200 --> 00:41:05,680
Speaker 3: their names.

867
00:41:05,920 --> 00:41:09,839
Speaker 1: Is that they're in Florida, but then city to have Florida. Yeah,

868
00:41:09,880 --> 00:41:11,040
Speaker 1: they go by the city.

869
00:41:10,800 --> 00:41:11,680
Speaker 3: Not to Tampa.

870
00:41:11,760 --> 00:41:13,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, Tampa Bay Nice.

871
00:41:14,080 --> 00:41:15,000
Speaker 3: And Kansas City.

872
00:41:15,239 --> 00:41:17,919
Speaker 1: Yeah, you don't know why the team mascot.

873
00:41:18,080 --> 00:41:20,839
Speaker 2: No, okay, we're gonna go Chiefs and Buccaneers.

874
00:41:21,200 --> 00:41:24,400
Speaker 3: Buccaneers. I didn't know that that's Tom Brady's team, right, Yes.

875
00:41:24,280 --> 00:41:26,759
Speaker 4: Okay, I'm sure all the players who have been there

876
00:41:26,760 --> 00:41:29,640
Speaker 4: for years really appreciate that it's Tom Brady's team after

877
00:41:29,680 --> 00:41:30,120
Speaker 4: one year.

878
00:41:30,200 --> 00:41:33,120
Speaker 3: But sorry, you got to hand it to the guy.

879
00:41:33,280 --> 00:41:34,399
Speaker 3: I mean that is some.

880
00:41:34,600 --> 00:41:36,320
Speaker 2: Pretty good huh, pretty good.

881
00:41:36,840 --> 00:41:42,240
Speaker 3: I mean that is wild forty three. He's forty three, right, yeah,

882
00:41:42,400 --> 00:41:44,320
Speaker 3: playing these twenty two year olds.

883
00:41:44,560 --> 00:41:48,960
Speaker 4: Yeah, he's really taking care of himself. You'd probably be

884
00:41:49,120 --> 00:41:50,880
Speaker 4: very intrigued with his like health.

885
00:41:50,680 --> 00:41:52,680
Speaker 3: Original I would love to dive into that.

886
00:41:52,719 --> 00:41:53,080
Speaker 2: You should have.

887
00:41:53,160 --> 00:41:55,799
Speaker 4: They have documentaries on it. They do, Yeah, they've done

888
00:41:55,800 --> 00:41:58,720
Speaker 4: a TV the follow it. Well, I'm sure YouTube whatever

889
00:41:58,840 --> 00:41:59,799
Speaker 4: you could probably find it.

890
00:42:00,080 --> 00:42:01,680
Speaker 3: I'm be interested. I do know that he doesn't eat

891
00:42:01,760 --> 00:42:06,799
Speaker 3: night shades? What's that? Like tomatoes and like eggplant?

892
00:42:07,320 --> 00:42:09,560
Speaker 2: Night shades? Night shapes?

893
00:42:09,560 --> 00:42:10,520
Speaker 6: What kind of life is that?

894
00:42:12,440 --> 00:42:16,480
Speaker 4: How does she get vine without eating potatoes or eggplant?

895
00:42:16,880 --> 00:42:19,440
Speaker 1: Hard pass?

896
00:42:20,239 --> 00:42:23,480
Speaker 3: There's more to it than that. There's it's like tomatoes, eggplant,

897
00:42:23,520 --> 00:42:26,440
Speaker 3: There's more things than those only ones I can think of. Okay,

898
00:42:26,520 --> 00:42:27,920
Speaker 3: mark to a google. What's a night.

899
00:42:27,800 --> 00:42:30,880
Speaker 1: Shade, a family of flowering plants that ranges from manual

900
00:42:30,960 --> 00:42:34,400
Speaker 1: and perennial herbs to vines and then shrubs and trees

901
00:42:34,440 --> 00:42:34,960
Speaker 1: and there you go.

902
00:42:35,520 --> 00:42:41,480
Speaker 3: It feels like a lot of stuff. Yeah, so potato, tomato, peppers, tobacco.

903
00:42:42,440 --> 00:42:44,680
Speaker 3: Sounds like I could steer clear of that stuff too.

904
00:42:45,400 --> 00:42:47,680
Speaker 4: That's probably what has made him go to the super

905
00:42:47,719 --> 00:42:50,240
Speaker 4: Bowl so many times the night. The lack of night shades.

906
00:42:50,320 --> 00:42:51,479
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's the one thing.

907
00:42:52,960 --> 00:42:57,279
Speaker 4: Wait, this is totally switching gears, but kind of also relevant.

908
00:42:57,400 --> 00:42:58,719
Speaker 4: So you know, Claire and.

909
00:42:58,760 --> 00:42:59,480
Speaker 2: Dale broke up.

910
00:42:59,680 --> 00:43:01,760
Speaker 3: Yeah, and I.

911
00:43:01,640 --> 00:43:03,640
Speaker 2: Feel like her.

912
00:43:05,000 --> 00:43:07,640
Speaker 4: Response to the breakup and how she's coping with it

913
00:43:07,680 --> 00:43:10,000
Speaker 4: is very similar to you, and how she's just like

914
00:43:10,560 --> 00:43:13,120
Speaker 4: finding things that make her happy and doing things that

915
00:43:13,239 --> 00:43:15,640
Speaker 4: like take her mind off of it and distract her.

916
00:43:16,239 --> 00:43:17,080
Speaker 2: And I thought it was.

917
00:43:17,360 --> 00:43:19,719
Speaker 4: I was like watching her story and it was like

918
00:43:20,560 --> 00:43:25,880
Speaker 4: very much a similar vibe into like her just keeping positive.

919
00:43:26,000 --> 00:43:28,160
Speaker 4: And you know, she was like, right now we're going

920
00:43:28,239 --> 00:43:30,040
Speaker 4: up to the snow. I'm with my sister and I

921
00:43:30,120 --> 00:43:33,319
Speaker 4: just want to stay home, but no, I'm like fighting it.

922
00:43:33,320 --> 00:43:37,320
Speaker 4: I'm getting fresh air and like going out, and I

923
00:43:37,360 --> 00:43:37,640
Speaker 4: you know.

924
00:43:37,600 --> 00:43:39,600
Speaker 2: I was like, you know what, that's some Tanya energy

925
00:43:39,719 --> 00:43:40,080
Speaker 2: right there.

926
00:43:40,239 --> 00:43:43,080
Speaker 3: Thanks so much. Although, do you remember the day after

927
00:43:43,200 --> 00:43:43,960
Speaker 3: when I was with you?

928
00:43:44,280 --> 00:43:46,520
Speaker 4: Okay, well she's had some days too, Okay, I'm like

929
00:43:46,600 --> 00:43:49,359
Speaker 4: that first day a freaking mess.

930
00:43:49,400 --> 00:43:52,560
Speaker 3: You remember my whole My whole rule of a breakup

931
00:43:52,680 --> 00:43:54,960
Speaker 3: is like you give yourself one roll of toilet paper

932
00:43:55,960 --> 00:43:58,440
Speaker 3: and then you stop crying. I literally went through an

933
00:43:58,600 --> 00:44:01,279
Speaker 3: entire role the next day. I was like, what do

934
00:44:01,320 --> 00:44:01,960
Speaker 3: I do now?

935
00:44:02,080 --> 00:44:04,759
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's easier to say those things until you know,

936
00:44:04,840 --> 00:44:08,200
Speaker 4: it's easier when you're not in this situation to you know,

937
00:44:08,280 --> 00:44:08,879
Speaker 4: do those things.

938
00:44:09,000 --> 00:44:12,480
Speaker 1: I thought there was a timing mechanism, like you can

939
00:44:12,520 --> 00:44:14,600
Speaker 1: you can be sad as long as the toilet paper

940
00:44:14,600 --> 00:44:16,479
Speaker 1: exists on the role, But once you have to change

941
00:44:16,480 --> 00:44:18,279
Speaker 1: the role, that's when you know it's time to move on.

942
00:44:18,760 --> 00:44:20,400
Speaker 1: You mean, is that what you mean? You mean like

943
00:44:20,400 --> 00:44:21,520
Speaker 1: to stop up your tears?

944
00:44:21,880 --> 00:44:23,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, like you give yourself like a role.

945
00:44:24,040 --> 00:44:27,080
Speaker 4: I think, you know, but I think to stop your

946
00:44:27,080 --> 00:44:29,879
Speaker 4: tears saying is like do you have a whole role

947
00:44:29,960 --> 00:44:31,239
Speaker 4: to use in the bathroom?

948
00:44:31,360 --> 00:44:33,440
Speaker 2: And then once that roll's gone? Is that what you're right?

949
00:44:33,600 --> 00:44:35,480
Speaker 1: Like, if it takes you four days to go through

950
00:44:35,480 --> 00:44:37,440
Speaker 1: a roll of toilet paper. That's how long it should

951
00:44:37,440 --> 00:44:38,759
Speaker 1: take you to move on and stop?

952
00:44:39,080 --> 00:44:39,200
Speaker 8: Oh?

953
00:44:39,239 --> 00:44:41,640
Speaker 3: No, like you have a specific role that you just

954
00:44:41,680 --> 00:44:43,520
Speaker 3: like take with you, like to the side of your

955
00:44:43,520 --> 00:44:44,840
Speaker 3: bed or the box of.

956
00:44:44,840 --> 00:44:46,120
Speaker 1: Cleanex white toilet paper.

957
00:44:46,120 --> 00:44:48,960
Speaker 3: That seems unpleasant, you know, I don't know why it

958
00:44:49,200 --> 00:44:53,799
Speaker 3: just happened to happened that way. And so I was like,

959
00:44:54,000 --> 00:44:57,200
Speaker 3: you know, it's a large role. You know, you can

960
00:44:57,200 --> 00:45:00,520
Speaker 3: get a jumbo size we want.

961
00:45:00,960 --> 00:45:05,440
Speaker 6: Yeah, do you find yourself like really small pieces to

962
00:45:05,480 --> 00:45:08,480
Speaker 6: make it last?

963
00:45:10,920 --> 00:45:13,160
Speaker 3: I literally been through one in like a day, and

964
00:45:13,239 --> 00:45:18,400
Speaker 3: I was like, well, there goes that rule out the window.

965
00:45:19,200 --> 00:45:21,879
Speaker 4: So just one one and done quickly like that.

966
00:45:22,280 --> 00:45:27,040
Speaker 3: Yeah, didn't work for me, but hopefully it works for you.

967
00:45:28,280 --> 00:45:32,480
Speaker 4: Did you also see Catherine Heigel's reaction to the Alex

968
00:45:32,520 --> 00:45:33,520
Speaker 4: and Izzy reunion.

969
00:45:34,360 --> 00:45:37,239
Speaker 3: No, so I just.

970
00:45:37,200 --> 00:45:42,160
Speaker 4: Read it from our rundown, But she she was basically like,

971
00:45:42,640 --> 00:45:45,280
Speaker 4: wasn't he Like when they told her that they got reunited,

972
00:45:45,280 --> 00:45:48,480
Speaker 4: she was like, wasn't he with someone? She didn't see it,

973
00:45:48,560 --> 00:45:51,799
Speaker 4: but she was basically like, wasn't didn't he have like

974
00:45:52,120 --> 00:45:57,840
Speaker 4: a relationship with someone else? And she said like, listen,

975
00:45:57,960 --> 00:46:03,640
Speaker 4: isn't that an asshole move? She was like, and then

976
00:46:03,719 --> 00:46:07,360
Speaker 4: they said she didn't exactly approve of the storyline, but

977
00:46:07,440 --> 00:46:10,719
Speaker 4: she has no intention of writing writing this wrong. In

978
00:46:10,760 --> 00:46:13,279
Speaker 4: an upcoming episode, she said, I would never say never,

979
00:46:13,360 --> 00:46:15,680
Speaker 4: but it's not likely like that she'll be back.

980
00:46:15,760 --> 00:46:16,080
Speaker 2: Yeah.

981
00:46:16,120 --> 00:46:18,440
Speaker 3: Well yeah, I feel like they didn't part ways happily.

982
00:46:18,640 --> 00:46:20,840
Speaker 4: Well I don't think Patrick Dempsey did either, from what

983
00:46:20,920 --> 00:46:25,160
Speaker 4: I gathered true. Did you see he posted a selfie

984
00:46:25,200 --> 00:46:26,719
Speaker 4: the other day and said good morning and an Alan

985
00:46:26,800 --> 00:46:28,160
Speaker 4: Pompeii I said.

986
00:46:28,480 --> 00:46:31,480
Speaker 3: And nothing makes me happier than celebrities that like tickle

987
00:46:31,520 --> 00:46:33,080
Speaker 3: our wickles, you know what I mean. Like it's like

988
00:46:34,480 --> 00:46:36,880
Speaker 3: they know, like they know what they're doing, they know

989
00:46:37,000 --> 00:46:39,919
Speaker 3: exactly what they're doing, and they like to stir it up.

990
00:46:40,000 --> 00:46:41,759
Speaker 3: And nothing makes me happier than that.

991
00:46:41,920 --> 00:46:43,480
Speaker 2: Like you, no, I hear what you're saying that you

992
00:46:43,560 --> 00:46:44,960
Speaker 2: just said, tickle our wickles.

993
00:46:45,080 --> 00:46:50,160
Speaker 3: Yeah, tickle Like Jessica Simpson responding to the Subway, like

994
00:46:50,200 --> 00:46:52,439
Speaker 3: you know when she's like, Subway said they're getting sued

995
00:46:52,440 --> 00:46:55,560
Speaker 3: because they're not really too She's like, it is confusing

996
00:46:55,680 --> 00:46:59,439
Speaker 3: so much. I know, Like Jessica Simpson, like she knew

997
00:46:59,440 --> 00:47:02,360
Speaker 3: what she was doing, and I respect it because it

998
00:47:02,400 --> 00:47:03,160
Speaker 3: makes me laugh.

999
00:47:03,640 --> 00:47:05,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's really good stuff.

1000
00:47:05,760 --> 00:47:07,520
Speaker 3: I wish more celebrities would do it.

1001
00:47:08,680 --> 00:47:08,919
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1002
00:47:08,960 --> 00:47:12,000
Speaker 4: Well this is our plea for all of you celebrities

1003
00:47:12,000 --> 00:47:17,360
Speaker 4: who listen to our podcast to to do that. Yeah, Okay,

1004
00:47:17,480 --> 00:47:18,960
Speaker 4: we are going to take a break. I know we

1005
00:47:19,000 --> 00:47:21,880
Speaker 4: have emails to get to, so we're going to hear

1006
00:47:21,920 --> 00:47:24,680
Speaker 4: from some of our wonderful sponsors and we'll be right back.

1007
00:47:40,080 --> 00:47:46,400
Speaker 2: All right, we are back and we have emails. Mark,

1008
00:47:47,120 --> 00:47:48,800
Speaker 2: it's go time, sure thing.

1009
00:47:48,640 --> 00:47:50,920
Speaker 1: Here we go, Abigail says. In a recent episode of

1010
00:47:50,920 --> 00:47:53,840
Speaker 1: the podcast, Becka discussed the revelation she had in therapy.

1011
00:47:53,920 --> 00:47:56,200
Speaker 1: She realized that the way she argues can actually fall

1012
00:47:56,200 --> 00:47:59,520
Speaker 1: into the category of gaslighting. I'm a newlywed and I'm

1013
00:47:59,560 --> 00:48:01,560
Speaker 1: having to learn and how to argue with my husband.

1014
00:48:01,920 --> 00:48:04,359
Speaker 1: I've been realizing that I do the exact same thing

1015
00:48:04,400 --> 00:48:06,880
Speaker 1: as Becca. I tend to believe that my way is

1016
00:48:06,920 --> 00:48:10,280
Speaker 1: the absolute truth, which I know sounds a bit delusional,

1017
00:48:10,320 --> 00:48:11,600
Speaker 1: but it's how I usually feel.

1018
00:48:11,920 --> 00:48:12,000
Speaker 4: That.

1019
00:48:12,160 --> 00:48:14,000
Speaker 1: Being said, Becca, do you think you could talk a

1020
00:48:14,000 --> 00:48:16,760
Speaker 1: little bit more about how you're working to change this behavior.

1021
00:48:16,960 --> 00:48:19,399
Speaker 1: What are some specific actions or thoughts you have been

1022
00:48:19,400 --> 00:48:20,760
Speaker 1: practicing when arguing?

1023
00:48:21,239 --> 00:48:23,080
Speaker 3: Wait, can I before you start. Can I just say

1024
00:48:23,160 --> 00:48:25,920
Speaker 3: that I am very proud of you just as a

1025
00:48:26,040 --> 00:48:31,239
Speaker 3: human being because I have watched you walk through so

1026
00:48:31,480 --> 00:48:35,160
Speaker 3: much and like, you just take accountability. Are you crying?

1027
00:48:35,560 --> 00:48:36,799
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm emotional.

1028
00:48:36,880 --> 00:48:39,919
Speaker 3: Well you really like you're taking accountab Like everybody has

1029
00:48:39,960 --> 00:48:41,520
Speaker 3: their their stuff, you know what I mean, Like we

1030
00:48:41,560 --> 00:48:45,359
Speaker 3: all have our things, and you've really taken accountability for it,

1031
00:48:45,520 --> 00:48:49,960
Speaker 3: and you've recognized the things that aren't working with you

1032
00:48:50,200 --> 00:48:53,800
Speaker 3: and you want to correct them for yourself, only for yourself.

1033
00:48:54,040 --> 00:48:55,520
Speaker 3: And I'm just so proud of you because I've just

1034
00:48:55,560 --> 00:48:58,080
Speaker 3: been like watching you do it and it's just awesome.

1035
00:48:58,239 --> 00:48:59,719
Speaker 2: Thank you, so nice?

1036
00:49:00,040 --> 00:49:08,120
Speaker 4: Get me a little teary eyed, Abigail. So I So,

1037
00:49:08,360 --> 00:49:11,120
Speaker 4: when I had this revelation with my therapist, she I

1038
00:49:11,200 --> 00:49:14,520
Speaker 4: asked her, like, what should I say or do when

1039
00:49:14,800 --> 00:49:16,520
Speaker 4: I have.

1040
00:49:16,640 --> 00:49:18,400
Speaker 2: My own version of what happened?

1041
00:49:18,440 --> 00:49:20,520
Speaker 4: Like, how do I say that without saying that's not

1042
00:49:20,600 --> 00:49:24,080
Speaker 4: what happened, which is the phrase that I typically go for.

1043
00:49:24,680 --> 00:49:28,240
Speaker 4: And she said, you know, saying something along the lines

1044
00:49:28,280 --> 00:49:33,240
Speaker 4: of that's not that wasn't my experience, or that wasn't

1045
00:49:33,480 --> 00:49:36,239
Speaker 4: that wasn't I think what it was was that wasn't

1046
00:49:36,239 --> 00:49:39,080
Speaker 4: my experience. I hear what you're saying. It's valid, but

1047
00:49:39,200 --> 00:49:42,759
Speaker 4: that wasn't my experience. I also said, because that's not

1048
00:49:42,840 --> 00:49:46,280
Speaker 4: really typically something I would if I'm in an argument

1049
00:49:46,440 --> 00:49:51,160
Speaker 4: that I'm common enough to accurate, like say in a

1050
00:49:51,239 --> 00:49:53,600
Speaker 4: graceful way, I don't think that would be natural. But

1051
00:49:53,640 --> 00:49:55,480
Speaker 4: if I said something along the lines of like, that's

1052
00:49:55,480 --> 00:49:58,080
Speaker 4: not really how I saw it, I saw it differently,

1053
00:49:58,200 --> 00:50:01,280
Speaker 4: or something along those lines, that's not just crediting their version,

1054
00:50:01,400 --> 00:50:04,680
Speaker 4: but also letting them know that that's not the same

1055
00:50:04,760 --> 00:50:07,960
Speaker 4: experience you had. I think is what's important. But also

1056
00:50:08,120 --> 00:50:12,800
Speaker 4: a problem that I've had when arguing is that, especially

1057
00:50:12,840 --> 00:50:16,640
Speaker 4: in my relationship, when I get heated, I like to

1058
00:50:16,800 --> 00:50:20,560
Speaker 4: take a beat and like process things in silent or

1059
00:50:20,600 --> 00:50:23,120
Speaker 4: like by myself and take some deep breaths and think

1060
00:50:23,120 --> 00:50:25,239
Speaker 4: about what we're arguing about so that I can come

1061
00:50:25,280 --> 00:50:28,840
Speaker 4: back and be more rational and level headed in my

1062
00:50:28,920 --> 00:50:31,920
Speaker 4: responses without getting because sometimes we just go on circles

1063
00:50:31,960 --> 00:50:35,840
Speaker 4: and it gets so exhausting that I get so much, which.

1064
00:50:35,600 --> 00:50:39,080
Speaker 2: Is kind of like I have a sting. Yeah, I

1065
00:50:39,120 --> 00:50:39,600
Speaker 2: like to stink.

1066
00:50:39,719 --> 00:50:42,960
Speaker 4: But also she was saying, so what I established, So

1067
00:50:43,080 --> 00:50:46,960
Speaker 4: I hate confrontations, So me just even being in the

1068
00:50:47,160 --> 00:50:50,600
Speaker 4: argument is stressful for me, Like I want to withdraw

1069
00:50:50,920 --> 00:50:52,800
Speaker 4: right off the bat, but like just being in the

1070
00:50:52,880 --> 00:50:56,040
Speaker 4: argument itself is like a feat for me, And so

1071
00:50:56,880 --> 00:51:02,000
Speaker 4: being able to communicate and be rational and express how

1072
00:51:02,040 --> 00:51:06,440
Speaker 4: I feel is a very.

1073
00:51:05,040 --> 00:51:06,400
Speaker 2: Hard thing for me, to be honest.

1074
00:51:06,440 --> 00:51:10,919
Speaker 4: It's something I've been working on and but I've told

1075
00:51:10,960 --> 00:51:12,879
Speaker 4: ninety five p Like when I say that I need

1076
00:51:12,920 --> 00:51:16,359
Speaker 4: a break, I'm not saying like I'm I or if

1077
00:51:16,360 --> 00:51:18,520
Speaker 4: I'm saying I need space to think. I'm not saying

1078
00:51:18,560 --> 00:51:20,680
Speaker 4: like we're breaking up or I'm not coming back or

1079
00:51:20,719 --> 00:51:22,960
Speaker 4: I'm just staying mad. I'm just saying I need a

1080
00:51:23,080 --> 00:51:26,000
Speaker 4: moment to calm down so that I can respond to

1081
00:51:26,040 --> 00:51:28,400
Speaker 4: you how you need me to respond to you without

1082
00:51:28,480 --> 00:51:30,879
Speaker 4: us going in a circle. So that's what I do,

1083
00:51:30,960 --> 00:51:34,680
Speaker 4: and ninety five has to be willing to let me

1084
00:51:34,840 --> 00:51:38,680
Speaker 4: do that without it being an issue. So that's kind

1085
00:51:38,719 --> 00:51:40,920
Speaker 4: of where I'm working on it. But it's hard, and

1086
00:51:41,000 --> 00:51:43,640
Speaker 4: like when we've gotten in argument, even though I am aware,

1087
00:51:43,719 --> 00:51:46,799
Speaker 4: I still have to like check myself and what I'm

1088
00:51:46,840 --> 00:51:50,920
Speaker 4: saying without saying something that falls into that category of

1089
00:51:50,920 --> 00:51:55,799
Speaker 4: gas lighting or invalidating the other person. Yeah, it's hard though,

1090
00:51:55,840 --> 00:51:58,680
Speaker 4: because when you're mad, you're just like, oh, you're wrong.

1091
00:51:58,760 --> 00:52:00,600
Speaker 3: And I also think it's just like nature, you know

1092
00:52:00,600 --> 00:52:03,839
Speaker 3: what I mean, Like we all see something through our

1093
00:52:03,880 --> 00:52:05,839
Speaker 3: own eyes, So it's like how do you not see that?

1094
00:52:05,960 --> 00:52:08,240
Speaker 3: You know? But it's like everybody's perspective is so different.

1095
00:52:08,560 --> 00:52:10,000
Speaker 2: I know, it's bizarre.

1096
00:52:10,080 --> 00:52:13,040
Speaker 3: It's bizarre, Like like it's like if you if we

1097
00:52:13,040 --> 00:52:15,359
Speaker 3: were running down, if we were running together and you

1098
00:52:15,400 --> 00:52:17,560
Speaker 3: saw all that, you would literally not even think twice

1099
00:52:17,560 --> 00:52:19,480
Speaker 3: about any of it. Yeah, And in my mind, I'm like,

1100
00:52:19,520 --> 00:52:21,799
Speaker 3: oh my gosh, the butterfly and the this and that,

1101
00:52:21,880 --> 00:52:22,439
Speaker 3: you know what I mean.

1102
00:52:22,600 --> 00:52:27,520
Speaker 4: It's like And also I have always thought like when

1103
00:52:27,600 --> 00:52:30,440
Speaker 4: I think if I'm arguing with someone and we're just different,

1104
00:52:30,480 --> 00:52:32,480
Speaker 4: like we don't see eye to eye, I've always been like,

1105
00:52:33,400 --> 00:52:36,759
Speaker 4: especially in this relationship, I'm like, we're so different, Like

1106
00:52:36,880 --> 00:52:39,200
Speaker 4: is there is it ever gonna work if like every

1107
00:52:39,239 --> 00:52:41,319
Speaker 4: time we argue we have a different perspective, Like we're

1108
00:52:41,360 --> 00:52:44,319
Speaker 4: so different. My therapist was like, why can't it just

1109
00:52:44,320 --> 00:52:47,160
Speaker 4: be that you're different and it not be a bad thing?

1110
00:52:47,320 --> 00:52:49,160
Speaker 4: And I was like, you know what, You're right, instead

1111
00:52:49,200 --> 00:52:51,839
Speaker 4: of like making it such a negative thing of like, oh,

1112
00:52:51,880 --> 00:52:54,239
Speaker 4: we're different, Like, how is this ever gonna work? I

1113
00:52:54,280 --> 00:52:56,840
Speaker 4: should celebrate the differences that we challenge each other. And

1114
00:52:56,840 --> 00:52:59,399
Speaker 4: my therapist is like, you don't even have to celebrate them.

1115
00:52:59,480 --> 00:53:01,920
Speaker 4: Why can't you just let your differences be differences? And

1116
00:53:01,960 --> 00:53:06,640
Speaker 4: I was like, okay, can work on that. Seems weird

1117
00:53:06,680 --> 00:53:08,840
Speaker 4: that it's not put in a category, but okay.

1118
00:53:10,320 --> 00:53:13,160
Speaker 3: So that you're never going to find somebody that's exactly.

1119
00:53:12,800 --> 00:53:14,879
Speaker 4: Like you, I know, But I was saying, like, when

1120
00:53:14,880 --> 00:53:18,320
Speaker 4: you argue, you know, if you're like always seeing things differently, Yeah,

1121
00:53:18,440 --> 00:53:20,640
Speaker 4: it's like, where do you ever come to resolution? But

1122
00:53:20,719 --> 00:53:24,040
Speaker 4: she's she was like just allowed to, like, don't overthink

1123
00:53:24,040 --> 00:53:25,799
Speaker 4: what the differences mean.

1124
00:53:26,040 --> 00:53:27,879
Speaker 3: Yeah, so I thought that was good.

1125
00:53:30,000 --> 00:53:32,680
Speaker 1: All right. This is from Lindsay another sad email. I

1126
00:53:32,719 --> 00:53:35,080
Speaker 1: was so sorry and sad to hear about Tanya and Redstar.

1127
00:53:35,200 --> 00:53:37,160
Speaker 1: I know how committed Tanya was and how she put

1128
00:53:37,160 --> 00:53:39,640
Speaker 1: her whole self into that relationship. Well, I'm in that

1129
00:53:39,680 --> 00:53:42,560
Speaker 1: situation and really struggling through a breakup. I was with

1130
00:53:42,640 --> 00:53:44,840
Speaker 1: him for two years and he was even going to propose,

1131
00:53:45,200 --> 00:53:46,680
Speaker 1: but we just didn't work out. At the end of

1132
00:53:46,719 --> 00:53:49,120
Speaker 1: the day. My question is how do I get through

1133
00:53:49,120 --> 00:53:50,920
Speaker 1: this breakup? It feels like a part of me is

1134
00:53:50,960 --> 00:53:53,319
Speaker 1: missing because he was my whole world and what I

1135
00:53:53,400 --> 00:53:55,839
Speaker 1: thought to be my future. Do any of y'all have

1136
00:53:55,920 --> 00:53:58,000
Speaker 1: practical tips or advice on how to move on?

1137
00:54:02,120 --> 00:54:04,080
Speaker 3: Well, let me tell you. You can get a roll of

1138
00:54:04,120 --> 00:54:08,680
Speaker 3: toilet paper and just give yourself square by square, square

1139
00:54:08,719 --> 00:54:11,879
Speaker 3: by square, and once that role is empty, girl, your

1140
00:54:11,960 --> 00:54:14,680
Speaker 3: tears are no longer welcome here.

1141
00:54:17,280 --> 00:54:17,400
Speaker 8: No.

1142
00:54:17,560 --> 00:54:21,040
Speaker 3: I think I think trying to focus on like just

1143
00:54:21,080 --> 00:54:23,839
Speaker 3: things that make you happy and really just kind of

1144
00:54:24,960 --> 00:54:28,160
Speaker 3: listening to your own heart in that regard, you know

1145
00:54:28,200 --> 00:54:30,320
Speaker 3: what I mean. It's like everybody has an opinion, everybody

1146
00:54:30,360 --> 00:54:33,600
Speaker 3: thinks different things, like things that you should do, different things,

1147
00:54:33,640 --> 00:54:35,680
Speaker 3: and I think if you just kind of follow your

1148
00:54:35,719 --> 00:54:38,680
Speaker 3: heart and do it at your own pace. And it

1149
00:54:38,840 --> 00:54:40,840
Speaker 3: sucks because I don't really know. She didn't really explain

1150
00:54:40,920 --> 00:54:44,200
Speaker 3: like how it all went down, But I think I

1151
00:54:44,200 --> 00:54:47,600
Speaker 3: think sometimes the hardest thing is like when for me,

1152
00:54:47,760 --> 00:54:51,360
Speaker 3: the hardest thing was when it's not a mutual decision

1153
00:54:51,640 --> 00:54:54,359
Speaker 3: and it's just somebody makes a decision for you. It's

1154
00:54:54,400 --> 00:54:57,200
Speaker 3: like you just have to accept it. And I think

1155
00:54:57,280 --> 00:55:01,000
Speaker 3: that was really hard for me, you know what I mean? Oh, Okay,

1156
00:55:01,040 --> 00:55:04,920
Speaker 3: so I just Okay, so I just accept it and

1157
00:55:04,960 --> 00:55:06,760
Speaker 3: that's it. So it's just you just have to focus

1158
00:55:06,760 --> 00:55:09,560
Speaker 3: on things that make you happy, whatever that is your friends,

1159
00:55:09,800 --> 00:55:16,520
Speaker 3: your family, your work, your runs, your crafts, saging, do whatever,

1160
00:55:16,719 --> 00:55:19,520
Speaker 3: like whatever just makes you happy. Just focus on that.

1161
00:55:20,800 --> 00:55:21,480
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1162
00:55:21,520 --> 00:55:23,960
Speaker 4: And I also think that there's some an element of

1163
00:55:24,760 --> 00:55:28,680
Speaker 4: remembering that he did this. It sounds like he was

1164
00:55:28,719 --> 00:55:30,719
Speaker 4: the one to break Do we get that?

1165
00:55:30,960 --> 00:55:32,960
Speaker 3: No, see, we don't know. She said didn't work out.

1166
00:55:33,360 --> 00:55:35,319
Speaker 1: I felt like that was implied, but I don't know.

1167
00:55:35,600 --> 00:55:37,640
Speaker 4: Yeah, I think if he was the one to do that,

1168
00:55:37,680 --> 00:55:40,359
Speaker 4: I think it's important to remind yourself that he made

1169
00:55:40,400 --> 00:55:41,640
Speaker 4: that decision to lose you.

1170
00:55:41,960 --> 00:55:43,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, and like stay in that.

1171
00:55:43,120 --> 00:55:47,480
Speaker 4: Headspace of he made the decision that he was willing

1172
00:55:47,520 --> 00:55:51,040
Speaker 4: to let you go and allow yourself to move on

1173
00:55:51,560 --> 00:55:53,919
Speaker 4: knowing that, because I think it's and it's so much

1174
00:55:54,000 --> 00:55:56,200
Speaker 4: easier so that when you're in a situation and there's

1175
00:55:56,280 --> 00:55:59,080
Speaker 4: love there and there's hurt and there's heartbreak, it's so

1176
00:55:59,120 --> 00:56:01,719
Speaker 4: easy to be like, well, you know, move on and

1177
00:56:01,760 --> 00:56:06,200
Speaker 4: know you're worth but you're in a sense and from

1178
00:56:06,239 --> 00:56:09,120
Speaker 4: what this email says, it sounds like he her identity

1179
00:56:09,200 --> 00:56:12,480
Speaker 4: kind of became that relationship, and she said he was

1180
00:56:12,520 --> 00:56:15,240
Speaker 4: her whole world and in her future, in her future.

1181
00:56:15,239 --> 00:56:17,719
Speaker 4: And I think being able to know that you are

1182
00:56:18,320 --> 00:56:21,960
Speaker 4: your own person and you're one hundred percent whole even

1183
00:56:22,000 --> 00:56:24,480
Speaker 4: without him, like together with the person, you should be

1184
00:56:24,520 --> 00:56:27,320
Speaker 4: two hundred percent and not just one hundred percent together.

1185
00:56:27,360 --> 00:56:31,239
Speaker 4: And I think being able to know that if he

1186
00:56:31,280 --> 00:56:33,759
Speaker 4: made the decision to let you go, then you need

1187
00:56:34,360 --> 00:56:35,680
Speaker 4: to let the relationship go.

1188
00:56:35,920 --> 00:56:36,360
Speaker 3: Yeah.

1189
00:56:36,480 --> 00:56:38,200
Speaker 1: This goes back to what we talked about earlier, about

1190
00:56:38,200 --> 00:56:40,440
Speaker 1: how we put ourselves into a job or something and

1191
00:56:40,480 --> 00:56:42,239
Speaker 1: it becomes your whole world. You put yourself in a

1192
00:56:42,239 --> 00:56:45,360
Speaker 1: relationship that's your whole world, and this is what it

1193
00:56:45,480 --> 00:56:47,960
Speaker 1: ends up being. And I know this is impossible to

1194
00:56:48,040 --> 00:56:51,040
Speaker 1: know at the time, but as an old person, I'll

1195
00:56:51,040 --> 00:56:54,879
Speaker 1: tell you it'll all make sense one day. You'll look

1196
00:56:54,920 --> 00:56:57,600
Speaker 1: back and you'll realize that I'm so glad I'm not

1197
00:56:57,680 --> 00:56:59,879
Speaker 1: with him anymore. I never would have met so and so,

1198
00:57:00,040 --> 00:57:01,960
Speaker 1: or I never would have done this or whatever it is.

1199
00:57:02,080 --> 00:57:04,160
Speaker 1: It's all part of the plan and you'll figure that

1200
00:57:04,200 --> 00:57:06,399
Speaker 1: out someday. It'll be so clear. But I know that's

1201
00:57:06,400 --> 00:57:07,759
Speaker 1: impossible to realize right now.

1202
00:57:07,800 --> 00:57:10,520
Speaker 3: Yeah, But and also, don't let it like, don't let

1203
00:57:10,560 --> 00:57:12,320
Speaker 3: it harden your heart, you know what I mean. I

1204
00:57:12,360 --> 00:57:15,080
Speaker 3: think that's like the biggest thing. And I see it

1205
00:57:15,120 --> 00:57:17,640
Speaker 3: happen to a lot of people, like they get you know,

1206
00:57:17,760 --> 00:57:20,120
Speaker 3: I think it's heartbreak sucks, and like you don't want

1207
00:57:20,120 --> 00:57:21,720
Speaker 3: to put yourself you don't want to be vulnerable again.

1208
00:57:21,760 --> 00:57:24,840
Speaker 3: You don't want to open yourself up to potentially get

1209
00:57:24,880 --> 00:57:29,280
Speaker 3: hurt again. But like if you want to do life

1210
00:57:29,280 --> 00:57:31,800
Speaker 3: with somebody and you see that in your future, like

1211
00:57:31,880 --> 00:57:34,600
Speaker 3: you have to just keep your heart open and like

1212
00:57:35,160 --> 00:57:37,840
Speaker 3: love as hard as you can, like give everything, you

1213
00:57:38,280 --> 00:57:40,760
Speaker 3: give it all, give everything, you're all, because then you'll

1214
00:57:40,760 --> 00:57:44,120
Speaker 3: have no regrets. So don't let it harden you.

1215
00:57:45,240 --> 00:57:48,680
Speaker 4: And we're very sorry you're going through this. Varings sucks

1216
00:57:49,640 --> 00:57:53,320
Speaker 4: and that's just sometimes you just got to say this sucks.

1217
00:57:53,800 --> 00:57:57,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, Oh I found the I have to read this quote.

1218
00:57:58,440 --> 00:58:02,160
Speaker 4: So it's a it's the account on Instagram is black

1219
00:58:02,200 --> 00:58:05,120
Speaker 4: female Therapist and it is such a good account. But

1220
00:58:06,040 --> 00:58:07,880
Speaker 4: it's like a post of a tweet, I guess, and

1221
00:58:07,920 --> 00:58:10,080
Speaker 4: she said. I asked my therapist why I couldn't get

1222
00:58:10,080 --> 00:58:12,760
Speaker 4: past something I really needed to get past, and we

1223
00:58:12,880 --> 00:58:16,000
Speaker 4: concluded I couldn't even admit to myself how much it

1224
00:58:16,080 --> 00:58:18,120
Speaker 4: hurt because I didn't want to be hurt, so I

1225
00:58:18,160 --> 00:58:21,360
Speaker 4: refuse to be hurt. But here I am years later

1226
00:58:21,720 --> 00:58:26,360
Speaker 4: hurting feel your feelings. And I was like, wow, we

1227
00:58:26,400 --> 00:58:28,840
Speaker 4: do this. I do this so often where I'm like, well,

1228
00:58:29,120 --> 00:58:31,200
Speaker 4: I'm not hurt because like I don't want to admit

1229
00:58:31,280 --> 00:58:34,160
Speaker 4: that I'm hurt, and yet years later it shows up

1230
00:58:34,200 --> 00:58:37,959
Speaker 4: in something because I didn't allow myself to feel the hurt.

1231
00:58:38,120 --> 00:58:41,200
Speaker 4: And it's like we should be feeling that even though

1232
00:58:41,240 --> 00:58:44,080
Speaker 4: it sucks to feel that. You know, it's like you

1233
00:58:44,240 --> 00:58:47,240
Speaker 4: experience the hurt and you also experience the love and

1234
00:58:47,280 --> 00:58:50,560
Speaker 4: the joy and all that. So it's like, allow yourself

1235
00:58:50,640 --> 00:58:55,680
Speaker 4: to be hurt in this breakup and then you can

1236
00:58:56,040 --> 00:58:57,200
Speaker 4: process it and move on.

1237
00:58:57,440 --> 00:59:01,320
Speaker 3: That's such a good point. A girlfriend of mine just

1238
00:59:01,360 --> 00:59:03,400
Speaker 3: got I wouldn't say dumped. They weren't. I don't know

1239
00:59:03,440 --> 00:59:05,560
Speaker 3: if they weren't. I don't really know the logistics of it,

1240
00:59:05,600 --> 00:59:07,960
Speaker 3: but they were like seeing each other for a few months,

1241
00:59:08,160 --> 00:59:10,919
Speaker 3: and she he was kind of like Sanzie with her,

1242
00:59:11,480 --> 00:59:14,160
Speaker 3: and she basically said, like, I don't want to I'm

1243
00:59:14,200 --> 00:59:16,880
Speaker 3: not gonna have sex until I'm in a committed relationship.

1244
00:59:17,040 --> 00:59:20,520
Speaker 3: And then he kind of just like checked out and

1245
00:59:21,240 --> 00:59:23,520
Speaker 3: it sucked, and she like was going through it, and

1246
00:59:23,560 --> 00:59:26,840
Speaker 3: she's just like, I'm just happy that a that I

1247
00:59:26,920 --> 00:59:28,600
Speaker 3: was able to like listen to my heart and really

1248
00:59:28,640 --> 00:59:31,560
Speaker 3: like you know, stand up for what I wanted. But

1249
00:59:31,600 --> 00:59:33,800
Speaker 3: I'm also like so grateful that I can have these

1250
00:59:33,840 --> 00:59:36,520
Speaker 3: feelings and like it sucks, and but I know that

1251
00:59:36,600 --> 00:59:39,520
Speaker 3: like the next one, like it's just it's all gonna

1252
00:59:39,560 --> 00:59:41,240
Speaker 3: like be worth it. And I was like, it's so true.

1253
00:59:41,240 --> 00:59:46,440
Speaker 3: It's like hurting sucks like the worst, but it's like

1254
00:59:46,480 --> 00:59:49,439
Speaker 3: at least we can feel. Yeah, I'm that's worth it.

1255
00:59:50,120 --> 00:59:51,680
Speaker 2: I know. I think we numb.

1256
00:59:51,800 --> 00:59:53,720
Speaker 4: We numb a lot of our pain so that we

1257
00:59:53,760 --> 00:59:56,520
Speaker 4: don't It's always there though, Like even if you numb

1258
00:59:56,560 --> 01:00:00,320
Speaker 4: it during the time it comes, it resurfaces because you

1259
01:00:00,440 --> 01:00:03,440
Speaker 4: do have to let go and feel the things.

1260
01:00:03,480 --> 01:00:04,480
Speaker 2: And then yeah, I.

1261
01:00:04,480 --> 01:00:08,960
Speaker 3: Let myself feel things I don't. I like look in

1262
01:00:09,040 --> 01:00:10,240
Speaker 3: the mirror and cry.

1263
01:00:10,720 --> 01:00:15,120
Speaker 5: I Like I used to look in the mirror and

1264
01:00:15,160 --> 01:00:16,680
Speaker 5: cry when I was a kid, Like when i'd get

1265
01:00:16,720 --> 01:00:18,280
Speaker 5: in trouble, I'd go back to my mirror and I'd

1266
01:00:18,320 --> 01:00:20,600
Speaker 5: just like watch myself cry and see like how hard

1267
01:00:20,640 --> 01:00:21,480
Speaker 5: I could cry.

1268
01:00:22,200 --> 01:00:24,520
Speaker 3: Or I like do things. It's like why would you

1269
01:00:24,640 --> 01:00:27,120
Speaker 3: Why would I ever pull out like a photo or

1270
01:00:27,160 --> 01:00:30,200
Speaker 3: like the cards and like read them and just torture myself,

1271
01:00:30,200 --> 01:00:30,680
Speaker 3: you know what I mean?

1272
01:00:30,720 --> 01:00:34,600
Speaker 4: And just like cry put on like sad break up.

1273
01:00:34,760 --> 01:00:40,600
Speaker 3: Yeah, like all the songs, just let it go. Well.

1274
01:00:41,760 --> 01:00:46,000
Speaker 2: On another note, we have our Gallantine's.

1275
01:00:45,360 --> 01:00:51,560
Speaker 4: Day, and I think it's perfect because like whether you

1276
01:00:51,680 --> 01:00:53,640
Speaker 4: love Valentine's Day or you don't like it, or it

1277
01:00:53,640 --> 01:00:56,400
Speaker 4: doesn't excite you this year, or you're going through stuff,

1278
01:00:56,720 --> 01:00:59,439
Speaker 4: we are here for a fun night with some love,

1279
01:00:59,760 --> 01:01:04,320
Speaker 4: some laughs, alcohol, like you name it, We're going to

1280
01:01:04,400 --> 01:01:07,400
Speaker 4: have it. And you don't even need a significant other

1281
01:01:07,440 --> 01:01:10,520
Speaker 4: for this party. In fact, unless they want to show

1282
01:01:10,640 --> 01:01:12,479
Speaker 4: up and be modern women, leave them at home.

1283
01:01:12,760 --> 01:01:16,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, because it's Gallantine to day Valentine's Date.

1284
01:01:16,440 --> 01:01:21,120
Speaker 4: It's happening on February tenth at five pm Pacific time.

1285
01:01:20,920 --> 01:01:23,920
Speaker 3: Which is eight pm Eastern. You got it. It's important

1286
01:01:23,960 --> 01:01:28,240
Speaker 3: to note that because I actually had I had a

1287
01:01:28,520 --> 01:01:32,640
Speaker 3: free Grammy event that I was attending that started at

1288
01:01:32,640 --> 01:01:37,440
Speaker 3: seven o'clock Eastern. Was not aware. Oh I thought it

1289
01:01:37,480 --> 01:01:39,120
Speaker 3: was Pacific, So just not the time.

1290
01:01:39,560 --> 01:01:42,480
Speaker 2: Good to know. Where can they get the tickets? Tony.

1291
01:01:42,640 --> 01:01:46,640
Speaker 3: They can go to on location live dot com slash

1292
01:01:46,760 --> 01:01:49,880
Speaker 3: scrubbing in and you can go right there. A portion

1293
01:01:49,920 --> 01:01:51,600
Speaker 3: of the proceeds from the live event are going to

1294
01:01:51,680 --> 01:01:55,920
Speaker 3: go to save our stages and that is basically helping

1295
01:01:56,040 --> 01:01:59,680
Speaker 3: these small music venues that haven't been working because of

1296
01:01:59,680 --> 01:02:04,040
Speaker 3: the penn really just stay put and just help them

1297
01:02:04,080 --> 01:02:07,040
Speaker 3: in any way possible. So a portion of prosteds are

1298
01:02:07,080 --> 01:02:09,880
Speaker 3: going to go to that and it's just gonna be

1299
01:02:09,880 --> 01:02:10,439
Speaker 3: a fun night.

1300
01:02:10,800 --> 01:02:14,160
Speaker 4: Yeah, And you can get your new merch so that

1301
01:02:14,400 --> 01:02:15,880
Speaker 4: you have it for the event.

1302
01:02:16,880 --> 01:02:17,880
Speaker 2: We have the cue.

1303
01:02:17,880 --> 01:02:22,800
Speaker 4: I'm telling you, the quality and coziness of these sweatshirts

1304
01:02:22,960 --> 01:02:26,120
Speaker 4: is next level. And we also restoked the Amabecca I'm

1305
01:02:26,120 --> 01:02:29,200
Speaker 4: Atanya t shirt, So get those while you can.

1306
01:02:31,960 --> 01:02:32,680
Speaker 2: That's all I got.

1307
01:02:32,920 --> 01:02:34,560
Speaker 3: I actually got the socks downstairs.

1308
01:02:34,800 --> 01:02:35,320
Speaker 2: I saw her.

1309
01:02:35,920 --> 01:02:37,880
Speaker 3: Yeah, I was like, that's a pair for me, right Yeah.

1310
01:02:38,000 --> 01:02:42,040
Speaker 4: Okay, So on that note, we cannot wait to see

1311
01:02:42,040 --> 01:02:46,160
Speaker 4: you there, and we will be back next Monday.

1312
01:02:46,560 --> 01:02:50,880
Speaker 3: Next Monday for more of this Next Monday. It's February first.

1313
01:02:51,240 --> 01:02:52,680
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's February finally.

1314
01:02:52,760 --> 01:02:53,040
Speaker 6: Wow.

1315
01:02:53,400 --> 01:02:56,240
Speaker 3: So next Monday is the eighth. That's soon.

1316
01:03:00,160 --> 01:03:02,240
Speaker 1: Under is fascinating isn't it.

1317
01:03:02,240 --> 01:03:04,640
Speaker 3: It really is a fascinating thing. But it's like when

1318
01:03:04,680 --> 01:03:06,960
Speaker 3: you're in the quarantine and all the days just like

1319
01:03:07,040 --> 01:03:09,360
Speaker 3: blur together. It's like, and I'm so glad that I

1320
01:03:09,440 --> 01:03:11,200
Speaker 3: just realized it's February. First, I have to put my

1321
01:03:11,320 --> 01:03:12,040
Speaker 3: rent check.

1322
01:03:11,880 --> 01:03:13,320
Speaker 2: In, I know, I have to. Yeah.

1323
01:03:13,480 --> 01:03:18,480
Speaker 4: Same, yeah, always fun. We love you, guys, We love you.

1324
01:03:18,960 --> 01:03:23,520
Speaker 4: I hope you have a wonderful week, a wonderful.

1325
01:03:23,080 --> 01:03:24,720
Speaker 2: Week, feeling all the feelings.

1326
01:03:25,400 --> 01:03:27,240
Speaker 3: I also want to say, I don't want to jinx

1327
01:03:27,240 --> 01:03:30,040
Speaker 3: anything that I hope this time next week we have

1328
01:03:30,080 --> 01:03:35,960
Speaker 3: a significant announcement from you.

1329
01:03:36,200 --> 01:03:40,320
Speaker 2: Oh same. So this is if you follow me on Instagram.

1330
01:03:40,320 --> 01:03:42,439
Speaker 2: I'm buying. I'm in the process of looking for a home.

1331
01:03:42,520 --> 01:03:43,320
Speaker 3: So nice.

1332
01:03:43,560 --> 01:03:46,640
Speaker 4: Yeah, but anyway, so hopefully we'll have that. If not,

1333
01:03:46,760 --> 01:03:48,200
Speaker 4: it's fine, We'll have one eventually.

1334
01:03:48,400 --> 01:03:48,680
Speaker 3: Yep.

1335
01:03:48,840 --> 01:04:03,120
Speaker 4: And on that note, we love you all, love you, Goodbye, goodbye,