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Speaker 1: Up next Out Wow what you don't know called part

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Speaker 1: of the Gang, which switch actually football. I don't know

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Speaker 1: about you, but I need a break from politics, so

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Speaker 1: we're gonna do something fun and a little different this week.

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Speaker 1: Trust me, you will want to stick around. This is

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Speaker 1: Out Loud with Gianna Callblow. Welcome Back to Allow with

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Speaker 1: Gianno Caldwell. I got a very special show for you

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Speaker 1: guys this week. For the first time, I'm having on

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Speaker 1: two guests. They're good friends of mine. I've been to

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Speaker 1: their homes, spend time with them, and they are great,

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Speaker 1: great people. I'm talking about Mike Hill and Cynthia Bailey Hill,

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Speaker 1: a power couple have been mary since October of last year.

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Speaker 1: Mike is a veteran broadcaster and television personality who currently

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Speaker 1: works at Fox Sports and the Black News Channel. He's

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Speaker 1: also the author of Open Mic ran On, his memoir

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Speaker 1: about his life that came out last year. His wife, Cynthia,

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Speaker 1: is a model, actress and reality star from the Real

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Speaker 1: Housewives of Atlanta Today. I want to talk to them

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Speaker 1: about all things relationships. Plus I want to get into

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Speaker 1: the entertainment industry and maybe get some inside scoops about

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Speaker 1: their life in the limelight. But before we go there,

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Speaker 1: we're about to address the national debate about racing police

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Speaker 1: shootings that is raging across the country. Let's go. I

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Speaker 1: am so honored to welcome Mike Hill and Cynthia Hill Bailey. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I know, we in here. We here. If I can

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Speaker 1: tell you how many times we say that to each other,

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Speaker 1: like any time your name comes up for the rest

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Speaker 1: of the day, no matter what, we always say, we're

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Speaker 1: in here. I'm so excited that I made such a

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Speaker 1: great impact on your lives, so so thankful for that.

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Speaker 1: So this episode is extremely special to me. It's about relationships,

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Speaker 1: It's about love, and it's something that you all know

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Speaker 1: so much about, having had relationships and years of experience

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Speaker 1: and so much knowledge that you're gonna drop on us today,

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Speaker 1: so much that I'm expecting to learn. But before we

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Speaker 1: get started there, I wanted to just talk about what's

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Speaker 1: going on in the moment in our country, whereas we

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Speaker 1: have a number of police involved shootings that have occurred,

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Speaker 1: We're still in the Derek Chauvin trial from his murdering

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Speaker 1: of George Floyd, and we're the temperature is really high

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Speaker 1: right now, and rightfully so I would argue because there

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Speaker 1: needs to be something done. We need police reform. There

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Speaker 1: has to be solutions, and I wanted to get each

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Speaker 1: of your takes on what's going on in this moment

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Speaker 1: and what could we potentially do to end it till

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Speaker 1: folks can feel safe and we can just live together

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Speaker 1: as a united community. Well that's the tough question because

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Speaker 1: I think if we actually had the solutions, we probably

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Speaker 1: started working towards them. But I think from our side,

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Speaker 1: I think from UH, as a black man who's been

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Speaker 1: pulled over and been harassed, who's been profiled before, I

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Speaker 1: think the first step is, you know, I think the police.

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Speaker 1: And I'm not saying white police, I'm not saying black police.

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Speaker 1: I think it's the blue I don't think it's a

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Speaker 1: black white issue. Most of the time when it comes

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Speaker 1: to police relations with African American people, I think it's

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Speaker 1: more of a blue issue because a lot of times,

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Speaker 1: and I don't know if it's training, I don't know

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Speaker 1: if it's just the mindset, but we're viewed as a

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Speaker 1: threat automatically. We've even heard policemen say that before. When

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Speaker 1: they go into certain neighborhoods, they fear automatically and and

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Speaker 1: that needs to start there. They need to see us

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Speaker 1: as humans and not as somebody they can pick up

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Speaker 1: and and and get points for, you know, doing their

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Speaker 1: job or whatever or whatever you call that, or you know,

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Speaker 1: or just feel like we're automatically out there to get them,

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Speaker 1: We're doing something wrong. There's an issue in this country

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Speaker 1: when uh, three times as many black men and women

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Speaker 1: are killed by police officers than white people, uh and

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Speaker 1: a lot of times many times they're unarmed. We've seen that,

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Speaker 1: as you mentioned with George Floyd. We've seen that with

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Speaker 1: Dante right just moments, you know, not too long ago.

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Speaker 1: We've seen it with Eric Garnand we've seen it so

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Speaker 1: many times and so many names. We can say their

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Speaker 1: names over and over again. But for the smallest infractions

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Speaker 1: as well. It could be a tail light, it can

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Speaker 1: be lucy cigarettes, it can be allegations of a counterfeit

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Speaker 1: twenty dollar bill. So until I think the police black

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Speaker 1: white indifference Latino start seeing us as humans and not

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Speaker 1: just a threat, I think we're gonna have this problem.

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Speaker 1: So we're gonna have police perform whatever we need to do,

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Speaker 1: train and get rid of some of the bad cops.

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Speaker 1: And when you bring in the new cops. They have

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Speaker 1: to have the right mentality, in the right attitude towards

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Speaker 1: Black people to see us the way we need to

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Speaker 1: be seen, and that's as human beings and not as

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Speaker 1: a threat. Right. And um, I would agree with my

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Speaker 1: husband on this one. You know, for the most part,

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Speaker 1: I think one of the most important things we can

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Speaker 1: do is do what we're doing with you just keep

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Speaker 1: the conversation going, you know what I'm saying. Um, you know,

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Speaker 1: keep posting about to keep talking about it. Um, I've

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Speaker 1: been around for a long time. I will say this

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Speaker 1: is the first, you know, since the movement, Like all

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Speaker 1: these things have been happening for years, okay, just on

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Speaker 1: different levels and just you know, just not you know,

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Speaker 1: just worst video footage. The video footage has gotten better,

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Speaker 1: but it's still the same videos of people just and

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Speaker 1: justice happening over and over again to black folks. So

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Speaker 1: I would say, we got to just keep talking about it,

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Speaker 1: and we gotta keep protesting, and we have to keep

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Speaker 1: bringing it up, and we have to keep putting electing people,

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Speaker 1: putting you know, different people in place that can reper

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Speaker 1: s black people to try to make effective change, and

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Speaker 1: just you know, keep the conversation going as parents of

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Speaker 1: young adults who drive. Um, you know, going back to

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Speaker 1: what Mike was saying about like it could be the

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Speaker 1: most I mean, basically, no one could run a stop sign,

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Speaker 1: get pulled over, and literally be in fear of just

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Speaker 1: something a simple arrest or you know, a warning or

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Speaker 1: anything going to the left if she didn't comply in

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Speaker 1: a certain way or they didn't feel like she complied

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Speaker 1: in a certain way. And Mike, you know, used the

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Speaker 1: word you know, they see us. He used the word threat.

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Speaker 1: He said that they see us a threat. Sometimes I

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Speaker 1: don't feel like some of these situations are even seen

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Speaker 1: as a threat. Like if I'm a grown, fifty four

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Speaker 1: year old black woman, if I'm driving my car and

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Speaker 1: I see blue lights behind me, I'm I will immediately

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Speaker 1: go into panic mode. I don't have any warrants, I've

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Speaker 1: broken any laws, but I just feel like I live

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Speaker 1: in Atlanta, Georgia. Uh if I get the wrong police

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Speaker 1: officer to pull me over for whatever reason, as someone

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Speaker 1: who has no criminal history, who has no reason to

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Speaker 1: be afraid, I am honestly afraid. I'm praying that I

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Speaker 1: get a good cop that is going to treat me

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Speaker 1: with respect, asked me for my credentials, run my tax whatever,

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Speaker 1: tell me what I did wrong, and send me on

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Speaker 1: my way as to it ending up going left or

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Speaker 1: being tased or shot for no reason. And then that's

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Speaker 1: and that piggyback and off of that is that's the problem,

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Speaker 1: is that we shouldn't be in fear of somebody that

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Speaker 1: we pay with our tax dollarge us to protect and

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Speaker 1: serve us. We shouldn't have that fear, but we do.

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Speaker 1: And it's not something new, and people think, you know,

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Speaker 1: it's something new, and we're screaming and yelling. We're screaming

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Speaker 1: and yelling because it's been happening our entire lives. It's

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Speaker 1: just now being exposed because of social media. Everybody has

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Speaker 1: a camera phone of course obvious slee uh. Police officers

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Speaker 1: have their body cams now, so it's being exposed and

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Speaker 1: put out there in the open. But you know, other

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Speaker 1: things get rid of qualified immunity. Maybe I don't know

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Speaker 1: if it's completely defunding the police, but it definitely needs

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Speaker 1: to be reformed. There needs to The George Floyd Act

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Speaker 1: needs to be passed in Congress because if there's a

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Speaker 1: bad cop that's doing bad things, and he gets fired

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Speaker 1: from a position in one city, shouldn't just be able

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Speaker 1: to go to another city and get another job. So

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Speaker 1: there needs to be that database. So there are a

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Speaker 1: lot of different issues that need to be rectified. I

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Speaker 1: don't know if I have the correct answer to answer

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Speaker 1: your question, but there's a lot and uh, we we we.

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Speaker 1: There has to be a change because it can't go

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Speaker 1: on for long, and accountability first and foremost. So when

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Speaker 1: you talk about accountability, the reason why a lot of

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Speaker 1: black people are upset is not only because we're being

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Speaker 1: killed in the streets. Unarmed black people are being killed

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Speaker 1: in the streets. And I'm not saying that everybody they

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Speaker 1: gets pulled over doesn't deserve to go to jail, because

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Speaker 1: they do. There's people if if you're committing to crime,

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Speaker 1: you're doing something wrong and you threaten the police in

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Speaker 1: any kind of way, or if you got a weapon

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Speaker 1: or whatever. I get that, But we want the same

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Speaker 1: treatment that we see our white counterparts getting. We want

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Speaker 1: that equality and we want accountability. So if somebody does

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Speaker 1: do something wrong and they get charged, we want an

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Speaker 1: indictment first and foremost. Didn't have that with the Brianna Taylor,

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Speaker 1: we didn't get the we didn't get the charges. But

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Speaker 1: we also have seen numerous times where somebody that could

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Speaker 1: kill a black person who was unarmed, get off and

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Speaker 1: not even be charged. Eric Garner's situation, his copies, his

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Speaker 1: the copass is, you know, back on the force. I mean,

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Speaker 1: so you see those types of things happening and you

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Speaker 1: wonder why. So that's why it's important for this Derek

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Speaker 1: Chauvin trial. Um, I'm praying, I'm praying that there's accountability

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Speaker 1: in that case. I'm praying there's some sense of accountability

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Speaker 1: when it comes to the Dante Rights situation in some ways,

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Speaker 1: because once I think the police officers start seeing that

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Speaker 1: they're having to pay for their transgressions, then that will

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Speaker 1: deter others, hopefully from committing the same crimes, because if

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Speaker 1: they feel like they can do it and get away

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Speaker 1: with it, they're going to continue to be bold, continue

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Speaker 1: to be aggressive, continue to brutalize black people in these streets.

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Speaker 1: And uh, it's just not a good thing at all. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: and and and just in closing, if these police officers

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Speaker 1: feel so bold and so comfortable doing the things that

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Speaker 1: we have seen them do when they know they're being video,

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Speaker 1: what in God's name doing that we don't see you

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Speaker 1: have been doing for years? You know what I'm saying,

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Speaker 1: What if no one's there take what if we don't

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Speaker 1: have the video footage? What if they feel that comfortable

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Speaker 1: doing the things that they have done and they know

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Speaker 1: it's being filmed. I can't imagine what happens when it's

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Speaker 1: not being filmed and they actually make it to the

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Speaker 1: police station, Like what what are the boundaries? Like? What?

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Speaker 1: Like I I just I mean, thank god we actually

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Speaker 1: have video footage, because if we didn't, you know, then

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Speaker 1: what and what happens when it's not being video That's

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Speaker 1: what I'm saying that so so in Bolden, you see

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Speaker 1: Derek Chauvin, no one's being taped, he still put his

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Speaker 1: hand in his pocket and still do it. I mean

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Speaker 1: that's like we're just he's just smirking right in your face.

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Speaker 1: That hurts that that is you know, that's throwing salt

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Speaker 1: in the wound. Were like, I know what I'm doing

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Speaker 1: and I'm getting away with and there's nothing you can

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Speaker 1: do about it. It was literally almost smiling anyway, Hey,

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Speaker 1: I know this is doing I know this is wrong.

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Speaker 1: You know that this is despicable but I don't care.

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Speaker 1: What are you guys gonna do about it? Nothing that change.

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Speaker 1: They do not fear us, they do not respect us,

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Speaker 1: and they do not value us, and that has to change. Well,

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Speaker 1: thank you all for sharing your thoughts on that, and

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Speaker 1: certainly that I agree with a number of your points there.

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Speaker 1: And I've had experiences myself, and of course I have

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Speaker 1: no criminal background or anything like that. But even when

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Speaker 1: I go get my driver's license, I make sure that

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Speaker 1: I have a fresh haircut. I wear a suit and

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Speaker 1: a tie, and I smile. So if someone pulls me

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Speaker 1: over and they see my ID, they think a little

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Speaker 1: deeper about who I might be or because it's not

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Speaker 1: typical to have a suit on and smiling in your

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Speaker 1: in your I d especially with some some of the

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Speaker 1: mean to cut y'all Giano, they don't even wait to

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Speaker 1: see your identification. They pull you over and they're automatically

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Speaker 1: look Lieutenant Nazario, the person of Virginia. You know, he

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Speaker 1: didn't have a tax on his on the back, but

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Speaker 1: he had him in the window. And he pulls over

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Speaker 1: and he feels like his life is in danger. He

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Speaker 1: feels scared. He pulls over in a lit area and

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Speaker 1: the police officers already uh in aggressive mode because he

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Speaker 1: sees that face. George Floyd is sleeping in the clock

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Speaker 1: car at the time, and the cop already has his

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Speaker 1: gun out, so before he can even present any kind

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Speaker 1: of identification, all they see is the black face you

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Speaker 1: know so, and and and and then that's another thing

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Speaker 1: after And I don't mean to cut you off, John,

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Speaker 1: I know who You're not gonna try and take over

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Speaker 1: your podcast, bro, But it's it's it's it's it's that

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Speaker 1: that that's the problem is once again, it's like they

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Speaker 1: it's jumping to the conclusions before we can even identify

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Speaker 1: ourselves to find out who we are. And then even

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Speaker 1: after you get arrested, you get brutalized, you get killed.

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Speaker 1: Then automatically there is another assassination that happens, the character

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Speaker 1: assassination that happens afterwards. We because they bring up everything

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Speaker 1: in your past that had nothing to do with this

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Speaker 1: particular situation that you were in at that moment. So

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Speaker 1: all of that is a big reason why and I

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Speaker 1: understand why you're doing it, but you shouldn't have to.

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Speaker 1: You shouldn't have to. And that's the problem, Giano, is

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Speaker 1: that you shouldn't have to go and get a haircut.

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Speaker 1: You shouldn't have to go that's true. That's true, and

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Speaker 1: I don't disagree with you on that point. I know

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Speaker 1: that for folks that are listening right now, there's gonna

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Speaker 1: be folks who agree with what you're saying, and they're

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Speaker 1: gonna disagree. I think I agree, and I've said to

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Speaker 1: conservatives I said on Fox News where individuals it has

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Speaker 1: nothing to do with the background. I shouldn't be hearing

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Speaker 1: about what George Floyd did in this criminal past. I

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Speaker 1: don't care about that. I don't care about their being

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Speaker 1: drugs in this system. What I do care about it

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Speaker 1: there was an officer who did something that was against

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Speaker 1: this code of conduct. So I hear that completely. So

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Speaker 1: what I'm hearing to summarize the US point of view

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Speaker 1: is we need to have the conversation, continue to talk

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Speaker 1: about it, continue to lift our voices and use our platforms.

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Speaker 1: And although I may not agree with everything that you

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Speaker 1: two have said, I do agree that there's a necessity

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Speaker 1: to have the conversation started. I think the police departments

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Speaker 1: need to be reformed. I don't think the police departments

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Speaker 1: need to be defunded, especially coming from where I come

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Speaker 1: from on the South side of Chicago, not having police

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Speaker 1: could be a death sentence because we got our own

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Speaker 1: people killing each other um as well, So that's a

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Speaker 1: that's another consideration. So you know, this is one of

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Speaker 1: those times where I think we all do need to

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Speaker 1: united as a country and speak out against um police

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Speaker 1: misconduct and and and violence. We gotta really be legitimately

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Speaker 1: have legitimate conversations around it and look to make changes

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Speaker 1: and leave politics out of it. So that's what I

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Speaker 1: personally believe, and I think you offer your your thoughts

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Speaker 1: on that now as we go into something that's a

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Speaker 1: little bit more of a lighter part of it. And

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Speaker 1: my wife said she wasn't gonna say that much about it,

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Speaker 1: but she got a lot to say. I don't I personally,

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Speaker 1: you know, don't you know it's upsetting every time, you know,

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Speaker 1: just even talk about it, because then it makes me

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Speaker 1: think about the news news clips and the videos, and

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Speaker 1: I'm like, and then it just makes me upset. So no,

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Speaker 1: I don't want to consume myself with seven because it's

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Speaker 1: it's depressing. It's very depressing, very depressing. So anyway, moving

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Speaker 1: on to relationship talk, we're talking to Mike Hill and

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Speaker 1: Cynthia Bailey here on the Outloue with gianno Conwell we've

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Speaker 1: got much more with them, ACTI quick, right, thank you

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Speaker 1: all for coming on to educate us on and you

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Speaker 1: know what your experiences at Madam and relationships. And you

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Speaker 1: all are obviously a power couple. You're on television every day. Um,

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Speaker 1: you're you're very viral. You're on the Real Housewives of

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Speaker 1: Atlanta and I think is the number one out of

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Speaker 1: the entire franchise for Bravo. So this is this is

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Speaker 1: a really good time to understand your story and what

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Speaker 1: you all have gone through and experiences, your challenges outside

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Speaker 1: of each other and with each other. And of course, Mike,

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Speaker 1: you wrote a book called Open Mic where you talk

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Speaker 1: deeply given your perspective on relationships. But let's start from

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Speaker 1: the very beginning. So a logical place would be to

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Speaker 1: start with how you all met, And let's let's kick

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Speaker 1: that off. Mike, go ahead, Well, we we met in

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Speaker 1: the most unconventional way. We actually met on the Steve

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Speaker 1: Harvey Show when he had a talk show on NBC.

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Speaker 1: He was doing a dating segment, UH and A, and

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Speaker 1: he had Cynthia on the show before. He's a good

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Speaker 1: friend of Cynthia's and he wanted to help Cynthia out

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Speaker 1: with her dating life. I was on a dating app

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Speaker 1: and he's old school. Steve is old school. He was like,

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Speaker 1: what the hell are you doing on dating app? You

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Speaker 1: don't need to be on dating ap. You know, I

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Speaker 1: got I know plenty of brothers that would blood to

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Speaker 1: go out with you, So, you know, joking around, I

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Speaker 1: was like, well, if you think you can do a

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Speaker 1: better job than find me somebody and I can then

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Speaker 1: go for it. Joking, you know, I didn't know fast

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Speaker 1: Forward I would actually actually be doing his dating pool. Yeah. So,

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Speaker 1: so there was a producer that reached out and I

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Speaker 1: was doing fast Sports radio and reached out to a

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Speaker 1: friend of mine or my co host at the time,

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Speaker 1: and said, hey, you know what, might be interested in

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Speaker 1: doing a dating show, um and meet one of the

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Speaker 1: real housewives of Atlanta. My first question was which one,

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Speaker 1: because obviously, because not all of them would have gotten

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Speaker 1: my attention. But when he said Cynthia, I'm like, okay, cool, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: go on there. Well that goes without saying that goes

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Speaker 1: without saying I just you know, you know, everybody knows

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Speaker 1: Cynthia Bailey's to find is the most classy one of

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Speaker 1: all the Housewives franchises, but now not true. It really

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Speaker 1: is you, my baby, I can say that, but you know,

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Speaker 1: so I went on there and I didn't expect much.

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Speaker 1: I didn't think Cynthia Bailey was going on there looking

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Speaker 1: for real love. I thought it was just some kind

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Speaker 1: of publicity things. So I was going to go along

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Speaker 1: with it and uh, the whole Obviously, I won the

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Speaker 1: dating pool and went there, and yeah, but it was

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Speaker 1: a slow burn, right, baby, wasn't well. The crazy thing

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Speaker 1: is my PR team didn't want me to actually do

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Speaker 1: the segment. I was on Steve Show promoting Housewives at

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Speaker 1: the time, and we were just playing around and then

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Speaker 1: when they went his when people circled back, and I

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Speaker 1: was like, hey, we really would like for Cynthia to

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Speaker 1: come undo stays dating pool. He really wants to up

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Speaker 1: hook her up. And my PR team at the time

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Speaker 1: was like, you know, we don't really think, you know,

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Speaker 1: it's a good look. Really, we just don't feel really

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Speaker 1: feel like you need to do it. You know, they

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Speaker 1: don't really you know, it's kind of it's not really

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Speaker 1: it's not really like a celebrity version of it, Like

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Speaker 1: basically they're like, it's usually for regular people and not

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Speaker 1: for folks on TV. So from a PR Steff Wonder

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Speaker 1: like it's beneath you basically to do it. You shouldn't

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Speaker 1: do it, but you know what, I'm going hear me

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Speaker 1: some loser like Mike our team and trying they were

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Speaker 1: trying to look at for my best interests. But here's

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Speaker 1: the thing, you know, I always just kind of go

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Speaker 1: with my spirit and my heart and just kind of

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Speaker 1: do whatever I want to do. Like I have a

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Speaker 1: great team of people that you know, give me great advice,

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Speaker 1: but at the end of the day, I'm going to

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Speaker 1: do what I want to do. And it just kind

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Speaker 1: of came up at a time where I was like,

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Speaker 1: you know what, as long as I have to get

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Speaker 1: stuck with nobody that I don't like, as long as

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Speaker 1: I if I don't have to pick anybody, if I

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Speaker 1: don't like any of these dudes, let's go, let's have fun.

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Speaker 1: And it was a free trip to l A and

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Speaker 1: I love being out in l A. So I was like,

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Speaker 1: let's let's go. Let's make it happen. So she made

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Speaker 1: it happen once again. She picked me, and I didn't

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Speaker 1: think anything of it. I like, like I said, I

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Speaker 1: thought i'd see her around, you know, maybe a couple

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Speaker 1: of years later and invent celebrity event of whatever and

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Speaker 1: say hey, let me stop Mike. Okay, first of all,

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Speaker 1: Mike was the cutest one. He was was lined up. Okay,

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Speaker 1: hold on, why why did you hear the shade? She said,

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Speaker 1: like it was Mike and a bunch of I'm like,

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Speaker 1: I'm not an Elba's clan. It's like it wasn't like

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Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying is Mike was definitely the standout. Okay.

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Speaker 1: When I was walking out to the stage, Mike and

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Speaker 1: these two other really nice guys were already out there. Okay,

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Speaker 1: they had three other dudes. They were like backup dudes

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Speaker 1: because I could switch a guy out if I didn't

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Speaker 1: like what I saw when I made it out there.

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Speaker 1: And when I walked past the backup guys, I was like,

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Speaker 1: I hope to hell does some better looking men on

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Speaker 1: this page. The backup plans are not gonna be backing

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Speaker 1: anything up over here. So um, anyway, long story short,

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Speaker 1: and I know we're not making it short. That's okay

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Speaker 1: out in every way, he just came off just super confident.

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Speaker 1: Um fun uh. He came off way more spirit and

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Speaker 1: religious than he actually is the man at he has

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Speaker 1: not taken me to church once we have, we haven't

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Speaker 1: been able to church. This is I've known you almost

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Speaker 1: four years now. If I stepped inside a church with

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Speaker 1: Mike kill at this point, it will probably fall down

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Speaker 1: on us. But I remember what stood out was every

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Speaker 1: question that I asked him, you know, had something about God.

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Speaker 1: So I was like, Okay, now I'm trying to be

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Speaker 1: as lady. I don't know if I want to be

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Speaker 1: the first lady. Is he? Is he getting better go

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Speaker 1: into I mean there's clearly a ministry inside this me. No,

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Speaker 1: But every question that that was a genuine answer. You know,

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Speaker 1: I still have I have a strong belief in God, strong,

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Speaker 1: very spiritual. You know, every night. This is the first

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Speaker 1: man I've ever been with that we get on our

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Speaker 1: knees every name. And so just because we're not in

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Speaker 1: the house of the Lord, doesn't mean that the Lord

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Speaker 1: isn't inside us, you know what I mean? So yeah, absolutely, man,

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Speaker 1: that's what That's what relationship is built on. But once

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Speaker 1: in so she picked me slow burned. I didn't think

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Speaker 1: I was going to actually see her. We went on

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Speaker 1: a date because the producers actually tricked us because it

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Speaker 1: went a couple of weeks right back, it was like

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Speaker 1: a week well, and then so I get I get

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Speaker 1: an email from the producer, and the emails from the

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Speaker 1: produce like Cynthy Bailey really likes you, she really wants

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Speaker 1: to go out with you. Is it okay for you

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Speaker 1: to have her number and give her a call? Like

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Speaker 1: oh really? And lo and behold. It was telling her

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Speaker 1: the same thing, you get in touch with you directly, okay. Well,

427
00:23:35,000 --> 00:23:42,720
Speaker 1: when I was like all right, sweating me so hard. Gone.

428
00:23:44,080 --> 00:23:46,360
Speaker 1: But you know what's funny because one of the things

429
00:23:46,440 --> 00:23:49,600
Speaker 1: I've really walked away when I first initially met when

430
00:23:49,640 --> 00:23:51,800
Speaker 1: I first initially met Mike, before we even went out

431
00:23:51,840 --> 00:23:53,919
Speaker 1: on a date, was just thinking, you know, it just

432
00:23:53,920 --> 00:23:56,360
Speaker 1: seems like a good dude, Like I didn't know, like,

433
00:23:56,520 --> 00:23:58,040
Speaker 1: you know, I wasn't like, oh my god, like I

434
00:23:58,080 --> 00:23:59,760
Speaker 1: can't wait to go out with him, and this is

435
00:23:59,800 --> 00:24:01,640
Speaker 1: death with someone I could see myself spending the rest

436
00:24:01,640 --> 00:24:05,440
Speaker 1: of my life with. My takeaway was he just felt

437
00:24:05,480 --> 00:24:08,439
Speaker 1: like a good guy, Like he just felt like he

438
00:24:08,480 --> 00:24:12,159
Speaker 1: had good intentions and he was funny, and he was cute,

439
00:24:12,240 --> 00:24:16,359
Speaker 1: and you know, he was likable, and he just felt,

440
00:24:17,320 --> 00:24:20,600
Speaker 1: you know, like someone that even if we didn't, you know,

441
00:24:20,840 --> 00:24:23,480
Speaker 1: if it didn't happen for us, I wouldn't mind having

442
00:24:23,560 --> 00:24:26,040
Speaker 1: him as a friend, which is one of the most

443
00:24:26,080 --> 00:24:29,000
Speaker 1: important things you can have in any kind of relationship

444
00:24:29,080 --> 00:24:32,359
Speaker 1: that gets serious, is the friendship first. And I felt

445
00:24:32,440 --> 00:24:34,640
Speaker 1: like I could be friends with the man. Yeah, and

446
00:24:35,240 --> 00:24:37,480
Speaker 1: piggyback off of that, I felt the same way even

447
00:24:37,480 --> 00:24:39,760
Speaker 1: if it wasn't somebody I was going to spend the

448
00:24:39,800 --> 00:24:42,439
Speaker 1: rest of my life with. With Cynthia, when I first

449
00:24:42,800 --> 00:24:45,879
Speaker 1: got to know her, I felt like, I'm going to

450
00:24:45,920 --> 00:24:47,520
Speaker 1: know this woman. She's going to be a part of

451
00:24:47,560 --> 00:24:50,399
Speaker 1: my life in some capacity. I don't know what, but

452
00:24:50,480 --> 00:24:53,159
Speaker 1: I felt a connection with her and she was just

453
00:24:53,200 --> 00:24:55,439
Speaker 1: so sweet, so genuine, which she still lives in this

454
00:24:55,560 --> 00:24:58,320
Speaker 1: very day. Uh. And I was like, maybe I could

455
00:24:58,359 --> 00:25:00,760
Speaker 1: introduce her to her next husband, or she introduced me to,

456
00:25:01,160 --> 00:25:03,320
Speaker 1: you know, my next wife. Who knows. But I knew

457
00:25:04,160 --> 00:25:06,320
Speaker 1: after a short amount of time that she was going

458
00:25:06,359 --> 00:25:08,240
Speaker 1: to be in my life for a long period of time.

459
00:25:08,400 --> 00:25:10,760
Speaker 1: And uh, you know, I'm lucky enough that she's my

460
00:25:10,800 --> 00:25:13,760
Speaker 1: wife and now she's Mrs Hill, not Cynthia. You said

461
00:25:13,760 --> 00:25:16,040
Speaker 1: it was like at first sight rather than love at

462
00:25:16,040 --> 00:25:21,679
Speaker 1: first sight. How did things change to love? Things changed

463
00:25:22,080 --> 00:25:24,760
Speaker 1: well to love. She might not want to get too graphic,

464
00:25:25,200 --> 00:25:29,639
Speaker 1: but things changed over time. You know what, We just

465
00:25:29,680 --> 00:25:34,280
Speaker 1: took our time. You know what, what's important to me

466
00:25:34,480 --> 00:25:39,360
Speaker 1: when someone expresses an interest in getting to know me

467
00:25:39,520 --> 00:25:45,880
Speaker 1: is consistency. You know what I'm saying, Like, and I'm

468
00:25:45,920 --> 00:25:48,680
Speaker 1: not saying you gotta blow me up the whole time,

469
00:25:48,720 --> 00:25:51,520
Speaker 1: but if you start off calling me five times a

470
00:25:51,520 --> 00:25:54,679
Speaker 1: week and then you drop down to once every two weeks,

471
00:25:55,680 --> 00:25:58,280
Speaker 1: that's not gonna work from miss bailing. Now, if you

472
00:25:58,359 --> 00:26:02,160
Speaker 1: start off calling me once every two weeks and that's

473
00:26:02,200 --> 00:26:04,399
Speaker 1: just what we're doing, then that's fine, but you can't, like,

474
00:26:04,520 --> 00:26:07,720
Speaker 1: you gotta be consistent with what, what, whatever it is like,

475
00:26:07,800 --> 00:26:09,720
Speaker 1: you got to be consistent with it. And one of

476
00:26:09,720 --> 00:26:14,199
Speaker 1: the things about Mike was he was consistent. You know,

477
00:26:14,400 --> 00:26:17,840
Speaker 1: he would call and check in. He wasn't like overly

478
00:26:18,280 --> 00:26:20,840
Speaker 1: checking in, but he made it pretty clear that he

479
00:26:21,920 --> 00:26:24,320
Speaker 1: wanted to be in touch. You know, he had some

480
00:26:24,359 --> 00:26:26,920
Speaker 1: distractions going on at the time when I met him,

481
00:26:28,160 --> 00:26:30,200
Speaker 1: have some things he was in the l a street.

482
00:26:30,320 --> 00:26:32,520
Speaker 1: You have some thoughts out there too. I had some

483
00:26:32,600 --> 00:26:34,920
Speaker 1: distractions going on at the time as well, so neither

484
00:26:34,960 --> 00:26:37,280
Speaker 1: one of us was like it in a rush to really,

485
00:26:37,400 --> 00:26:40,520
Speaker 1: you know, do anything. But it just got to a

486
00:26:40,600 --> 00:26:43,360
Speaker 1: point where the more I really started talking to him

487
00:26:43,400 --> 00:26:46,080
Speaker 1: more consistently, and then when we kind of graduated from

488
00:26:46,119 --> 00:26:49,879
Speaker 1: just talking and text into face timing. Um. I just

489
00:26:49,960 --> 00:26:52,919
Speaker 1: remember specifically he he had started writing his book and

490
00:26:52,960 --> 00:26:54,760
Speaker 1: he was like reading me some stuff from his book,

491
00:26:54,800 --> 00:26:57,600
Speaker 1: and I just was I just remember thinking, wow, like, okay,

492
00:26:57,680 --> 00:27:01,040
Speaker 1: guy and his brother been through something, you know, Like

493
00:27:01,119 --> 00:27:02,800
Speaker 1: it just kind of made me want to know more

494
00:27:02,880 --> 00:27:08,600
Speaker 1: about him. And I love um, you know, I don't.

495
00:27:08,600 --> 00:27:10,280
Speaker 1: I don't want to say I love people struggles, but

496
00:27:10,400 --> 00:27:17,040
Speaker 1: I love to see someone want to be better. I

497
00:27:17,160 --> 00:27:21,159
Speaker 1: love people that are trying to be happy. And I

498
00:27:21,400 --> 00:27:24,280
Speaker 1: loved when people are on a quest for peace, and

499
00:27:24,320 --> 00:27:27,639
Speaker 1: I love when people are just trying to live in

500
00:27:27,680 --> 00:27:30,439
Speaker 1: their purpose. And I felt like he was trying to

501
00:27:30,560 --> 00:27:34,000
Speaker 1: figure it out, and I felt like some of the

502
00:27:34,000 --> 00:27:37,520
Speaker 1: things that he was telling me about his past, it

503
00:27:37,640 --> 00:27:41,520
Speaker 1: just didn't seem like he was happy or happy. And

504
00:27:41,640 --> 00:27:47,639
Speaker 1: for me, that is devastating because I'm always on a

505
00:27:47,720 --> 00:27:50,040
Speaker 1: quest for peace. I have peace, and I even want

506
00:27:50,080 --> 00:27:52,480
Speaker 1: more peace Like that is I used to say I

507
00:27:52,520 --> 00:27:54,320
Speaker 1: just want to be happy. I don't say that anymore.

508
00:27:54,359 --> 00:27:56,640
Speaker 1: I say that I want peace because I feel like

509
00:27:57,119 --> 00:28:00,680
Speaker 1: I believe that if I have peace, I have happiness happiness.

510
00:28:00,720 --> 00:28:03,960
Speaker 1: But I could have happiness and I have peace. So

511
00:28:05,080 --> 00:28:07,520
Speaker 1: I wanted to see him when even if I wasn't

512
00:28:07,560 --> 00:28:11,080
Speaker 1: included at the end of his journey, but I wanted

513
00:28:11,640 --> 00:28:14,520
Speaker 1: to be supportive of what he would. It felt like

514
00:28:14,560 --> 00:28:16,920
Speaker 1: he was trying to do for himself, like I felt

515
00:28:16,920 --> 00:28:20,159
Speaker 1: like there was some self love missing or something, and

516
00:28:20,240 --> 00:28:24,440
Speaker 1: I wanted to Um, I don't know, I just roote

517
00:28:24,480 --> 00:28:26,159
Speaker 1: it for him, and then I ain't marrying a man.

518
00:28:26,200 --> 00:28:29,520
Speaker 1: What do you want me to say? Yeah, it's interesting

519
00:28:29,600 --> 00:28:33,120
Speaker 1: because I've had the honor and privilege of knowing Mike

520
00:28:33,440 --> 00:28:37,080
Speaker 1: before he met you, Cynthia. And one thing I realized

521
00:28:37,080 --> 00:28:39,320
Speaker 1: when Mike and I we would go out. We may

522
00:28:39,840 --> 00:28:43,640
Speaker 1: go to a restaurant, bar, or whatever the situation was,

523
00:28:43,680 --> 00:28:58,000
Speaker 1: and I just remember, whatever you need to say correctly.

524
00:29:05,640 --> 00:29:10,120
Speaker 1: That was the old man the new man here. But

525
00:29:10,280 --> 00:29:14,280
Speaker 1: no I saw I saw a sincere change in Mike.

526
00:29:14,480 --> 00:29:18,520
Speaker 1: When y'all begin dating in I'll never forget you said

527
00:29:18,520 --> 00:29:20,480
Speaker 1: that again, Like what kind of change when you say

528
00:29:20,520 --> 00:29:24,520
Speaker 1: a sincere change? Like what meaning? He was all about you?

529
00:29:24,600 --> 00:29:27,680
Speaker 1: And I think everyone realized that from seeing social media,

530
00:29:28,000 --> 00:29:30,080
Speaker 1: Instagram and all of that good stuff. But I'll never

531
00:29:30,120 --> 00:29:32,120
Speaker 1: forget talking to you, Mike. We were a town. It

532
00:29:32,200 --> 00:29:37,920
Speaker 1: was a Friday night in Los Angeles hangout. We were

533
00:29:37,960 --> 00:29:47,840
Speaker 1: there all the time that I'm sorry to take that

534
00:29:47,920 --> 00:29:51,200
Speaker 1: part out. That's gonna be a beat. John put a

535
00:29:51,280 --> 00:29:58,120
Speaker 1: beat Cassi producing, he'll beat that word. But sincerely, though,

536
00:29:58,160 --> 00:30:00,360
Speaker 1: I remember talking to you on a Friday night, Mike.

537
00:30:00,400 --> 00:30:02,680
Speaker 1: I don't remember if you you remember this. I don't

538
00:30:02,680 --> 00:30:05,320
Speaker 1: know if you remember this, but I was like, man, bro,

539
00:30:05,480 --> 00:30:09,480
Speaker 1: like are you in love? Like you? And he was like, Bro,

540
00:30:10,320 --> 00:30:15,280
Speaker 1: it's real, um and love. I'm like, man, because you

541
00:30:15,280 --> 00:30:19,240
Speaker 1: were going so hard. I'm like, I never seen this before.

542
00:30:19,280 --> 00:30:22,840
Speaker 1: So it was just so interesting to see that transition

543
00:30:23,000 --> 00:30:26,360
Speaker 1: just take place and it hit hard. It was almost

544
00:30:26,400 --> 00:30:29,560
Speaker 1: like you know when you you data celebrity, like y'all

545
00:30:29,600 --> 00:30:31,880
Speaker 1: both celebrities. You have both been on television. That's all

546
00:30:31,920 --> 00:30:35,120
Speaker 1: good and fun, but sometimes you kind of you go

547
00:30:35,200 --> 00:30:38,040
Speaker 1: in slow just to see how a person responds to

548
00:30:38,080 --> 00:30:40,120
Speaker 1: you and you don't you know, you don't take it

549
00:30:40,160 --> 00:30:42,360
Speaker 1: up a notch too quickly. But Bro was hit nor

550
00:30:43,560 --> 00:30:46,080
Speaker 1: I couldn't believe it. So it was almost like a certainty,

551
00:30:46,160 --> 00:30:48,880
Speaker 1: like you knew, Mike, did you know that this was

552
00:30:48,920 --> 00:30:51,960
Speaker 1: gonna be your wife? Like? When did you know? You know?

553
00:30:52,000 --> 00:30:53,840
Speaker 1: I didn't know, like I said, in the beginning of

554
00:30:53,880 --> 00:30:56,040
Speaker 1: our relationship, and a lot of people didn't know about

555
00:30:56,040 --> 00:30:59,280
Speaker 1: our relationship for a while, obviously, because when you're dating

556
00:30:59,480 --> 00:31:02,520
Speaker 1: a select really you need to keep that quiet for

557
00:31:02,560 --> 00:31:04,640
Speaker 1: a while because you know, people come for you and

558
00:31:04,800 --> 00:31:08,160
Speaker 1: and it's a different animal once you're out in the open.

559
00:31:08,360 --> 00:31:11,200
Speaker 1: Even if I've been on television, Cynthia is the celebrity.

560
00:31:11,240 --> 00:31:13,320
Speaker 1: I'm just a dude that's on television. I've been on

561
00:31:13,360 --> 00:31:15,760
Speaker 1: television for a while. But she's a celebrity and I

562
00:31:15,840 --> 00:31:17,960
Speaker 1: understand that, and it's a different animal that's out there.

563
00:31:18,000 --> 00:31:21,720
Speaker 1: So we didn't uh tell people publicly for a long

564
00:31:21,720 --> 00:31:24,920
Speaker 1: period of time, maybe about four months into a us

565
00:31:25,000 --> 00:31:28,960
Speaker 1: dating uh And then during my birthday, she did something

566
00:31:29,040 --> 00:31:32,400
Speaker 1: really special and it kind of made me say, like, oh, okay,

567
00:31:32,480 --> 00:31:35,120
Speaker 1: well she's she's a little different. She did something that

568
00:31:35,160 --> 00:31:36,960
Speaker 1: nobody had ever done from me, but nobody else. Still

569
00:31:37,040 --> 00:31:39,800
Speaker 1: my birthday party, so pretty much threw the man a

570
00:31:39,800 --> 00:31:42,440
Speaker 1: birthday party and he was in Well it wasn't but

571
00:31:42,480 --> 00:31:44,280
Speaker 1: it wasn't just a birthday party, but it was like

572
00:31:44,320 --> 00:31:48,080
Speaker 1: an intimate affair. She had set up her wind seller

573
00:31:48,120 --> 00:31:51,880
Speaker 1: before it actually had gotten built out, you know, candle lights, whatever,

574
00:31:52,200 --> 00:31:55,880
Speaker 1: cater and I'm like, this is this is for me.

575
00:31:56,200 --> 00:31:58,760
Speaker 1: I've always been I've always been a giver in relationships.

576
00:31:58,800 --> 00:32:02,120
Speaker 1: I've always been the one that has been asked to give,

577
00:32:02,480 --> 00:32:04,800
Speaker 1: and you know, you know, you receive a little bit,

578
00:32:04,840 --> 00:32:08,240
Speaker 1: but I never really expected it. And if I received something,

579
00:32:08,280 --> 00:32:11,560
Speaker 1: that was always in return or something I've given. Nobody's

580
00:32:11,600 --> 00:32:14,720
Speaker 1: ever given me something without me actually giving them something.

581
00:32:14,960 --> 00:32:17,200
Speaker 1: So when Cynthia did that for me and always tried

582
00:32:17,240 --> 00:32:19,480
Speaker 1: to look out for him, like she's a little different

583
00:32:19,520 --> 00:32:21,400
Speaker 1: and it had nothing to do with her celebrity or

584
00:32:21,400 --> 00:32:24,280
Speaker 1: her family whatnot. I wanted to date the individual. I

585
00:32:24,320 --> 00:32:27,440
Speaker 1: wanted to date the person Cynthia Deniece Bailey, and that's

586
00:32:27,480 --> 00:32:29,480
Speaker 1: why I found out. So over a period of time,

587
00:32:30,040 --> 00:32:32,600
Speaker 1: I just started to open up a little bit more

588
00:32:32,640 --> 00:32:34,880
Speaker 1: because you'll tell you I in the beginning, I was

589
00:32:35,000 --> 00:32:39,320
Speaker 1: very guarded, guarded. Michael's very guarded when I met him. Uh,

590
00:32:39,360 --> 00:32:42,400
Speaker 1: he was always kind of looking like literally was trying

591
00:32:42,400 --> 00:32:44,800
Speaker 1: to get in the door, but had an exit, exit

592
00:32:44,840 --> 00:32:49,920
Speaker 1: strategy the whole time. Yeah. Um, he was afraid to fall,

593
00:32:50,520 --> 00:32:53,400
Speaker 1: afraid to commit, afraid to be honest, he was just

594
00:32:53,400 --> 00:32:58,320
Speaker 1: afraid of everything. Yeah, And it was obvious. And I'm

595
00:32:58,360 --> 00:33:00,360
Speaker 1: you know, he met me at a point in my

596
00:33:00,480 --> 00:33:03,680
Speaker 1: life where not only do I know what I want,

597
00:33:04,000 --> 00:33:05,800
Speaker 1: I know what I don't want. You know what I mean.

598
00:33:05,880 --> 00:33:08,040
Speaker 1: And I'm like, look, we're doing this, we're not doing this.

599
00:33:08,200 --> 00:33:13,800
Speaker 1: Like I'm not like I don't go for me relationships.

600
00:33:14,120 --> 00:33:16,040
Speaker 1: You know, I don't have like a fear, like I

601
00:33:16,080 --> 00:33:19,760
Speaker 1: just love my pisces. I jumped all in with both feet.

602
00:33:20,320 --> 00:33:22,120
Speaker 1: If it works out, it works out. If it doesn't,

603
00:33:22,120 --> 00:33:24,120
Speaker 1: it doesn't. It ain't that deep, so I'm not really

604
00:33:24,120 --> 00:33:26,720
Speaker 1: trying to be halfway in and trying to be halfway out.

605
00:33:26,800 --> 00:33:30,160
Speaker 1: And I was like, dude, like, either we're gonna do

606
00:33:30,240 --> 00:33:32,400
Speaker 1: this or we're not gonna do this, Like this is

607
00:33:32,440 --> 00:33:36,560
Speaker 1: not a host situation we want if you're scared, if

608
00:33:36,560 --> 00:33:39,840
Speaker 1: you're that concerned and you just don't know if you

609
00:33:40,000 --> 00:33:42,920
Speaker 1: if this is making you this uncomfortable. We don't have

610
00:33:43,000 --> 00:33:45,200
Speaker 1: to be together. But but but but it wasn't an

611
00:33:45,280 --> 00:33:47,920
Speaker 1: uncomfortable with just me still figuring it out. I was

612
00:33:47,960 --> 00:33:49,880
Speaker 1: still going through my process, and like you said, I

613
00:33:49,920 --> 00:33:51,640
Speaker 1: was writing my book at the time, and I was

614
00:33:52,040 --> 00:33:54,760
Speaker 1: working through my issues. As I told you before, Giano,

615
00:33:54,880 --> 00:33:57,400
Speaker 1: my book was my first form of therapy. We talked

616
00:33:57,440 --> 00:33:59,960
Speaker 1: about this as black men growing up in certain environ

617
00:34:00,080 --> 00:34:03,080
Speaker 1: ments or just in general. You know, it's just not

618
00:34:03,480 --> 00:34:07,360
Speaker 1: something that we have in our community is therapy. And

619
00:34:07,640 --> 00:34:10,520
Speaker 1: my book became my therapy. And as I was writing

620
00:34:10,520 --> 00:34:13,280
Speaker 1: my book and I was sharing some of my stories

621
00:34:13,320 --> 00:34:16,960
Speaker 1: in my past and my truths with Cynthia, she was

622
00:34:17,040 --> 00:34:20,239
Speaker 1: the first woman that really accepted and didn't judge me

623
00:34:20,320 --> 00:34:22,600
Speaker 1: for him as a matter of fact, that brought us closer.

624
00:34:23,080 --> 00:34:25,799
Speaker 1: And as I started, as I started talking about a

625
00:34:25,800 --> 00:34:28,319
Speaker 1: little bit more, I felt like I can trust her

626
00:34:28,360 --> 00:34:31,280
Speaker 1: because I can tell her some of my most intimate

627
00:34:31,320 --> 00:34:34,600
Speaker 1: details that I probably hadn't even told people before. And

628
00:34:34,640 --> 00:34:37,080
Speaker 1: the reaction that she gave me made me feel like

629
00:34:37,160 --> 00:34:40,560
Speaker 1: I could trust her a little bit more. So I well,

630
00:34:40,560 --> 00:34:42,640
Speaker 1: I will say this and then we can move on

631
00:34:42,680 --> 00:34:46,680
Speaker 1: to the next question. I'm a very secure woman. I'm

632
00:34:46,719 --> 00:34:50,000
Speaker 1: extremely secure, and I think it's very rare to find

633
00:34:50,000 --> 00:34:52,759
Speaker 1: someone that says it and it's actually true. Like I'm

634
00:34:52,800 --> 00:34:56,960
Speaker 1: not going to question stuff. I'm not trying to check

635
00:34:57,000 --> 00:35:00,600
Speaker 1: your messages. I don't care about any that. I don't

636
00:35:00,600 --> 00:35:03,120
Speaker 1: give a damn who you following. I don't care. But

637
00:35:03,440 --> 00:35:04,839
Speaker 1: as long as you if you're with me, as long

638
00:35:04,880 --> 00:35:07,000
Speaker 1: as you're being appropriate, I don't care about you. Like

639
00:35:07,160 --> 00:35:16,600
Speaker 1: it that part, And she's a classy one on the

640
00:35:16,640 --> 00:35:25,760
Speaker 1: house because people don't anyway. But like there's like I think, like,

641
00:35:26,239 --> 00:35:29,200
Speaker 1: you know, I don't know what Mike was used to,

642
00:35:29,280 --> 00:35:31,320
Speaker 1: but I feel like I know, I know l a dating.

643
00:35:31,520 --> 00:35:33,759
Speaker 1: I know that's like and I feel like it's a

644
00:35:33,760 --> 00:35:36,560
Speaker 1: lot of game playing and like, oh, you know you

645
00:35:36,640 --> 00:35:39,200
Speaker 1: gotta be like, oh, let me try to you know,

646
00:35:39,280 --> 00:35:41,439
Speaker 1: if you text me, let me wait two or three

647
00:35:41,520 --> 00:35:44,640
Speaker 1: days the texting back, like playing all these stupid games

648
00:35:44,680 --> 00:35:47,040
Speaker 1: that I do not play. If I like you, I'm

649
00:35:47,080 --> 00:35:49,400
Speaker 1: going to act like I like you. And if you're

650
00:35:49,440 --> 00:35:52,120
Speaker 1: looking for a challenge, if you think me calling you

651
00:35:52,120 --> 00:35:54,120
Speaker 1: a couple of times a day that I'm not being

652
00:35:54,120 --> 00:35:56,719
Speaker 1: a challenge anymore, that's a turn off. And you can

653
00:35:56,760 --> 00:35:58,600
Speaker 1: miss me with all of that, Like, I'm not playing

654
00:35:58,680 --> 00:36:00,719
Speaker 1: any of those games at this point in my life.

655
00:36:00,719 --> 00:36:03,040
Speaker 1: I've never played those games. I'm certainly not going to

656
00:36:03,080 --> 00:36:06,360
Speaker 1: do it now. And I felt like, you know, Michael's

657
00:36:06,440 --> 00:36:08,400
Speaker 1: used to at L a dating style, and it was

658
00:36:08,480 --> 00:36:10,239
Speaker 1: like I think he had been, you know, in some

659
00:36:10,280 --> 00:36:13,040
Speaker 1: situations before me that maybe didn't work out for him,

660
00:36:13,040 --> 00:36:14,799
Speaker 1: that he would have liked for them to work out,

661
00:36:14,920 --> 00:36:17,239
Speaker 1: and I think those people may have been playing games.

662
00:36:17,280 --> 00:36:20,920
Speaker 1: So it was just kind of like a weird like like,

663
00:36:21,840 --> 00:36:23,799
Speaker 1: you know, we just had to kind of just have

664
00:36:23,880 --> 00:36:27,680
Speaker 1: a come to Jesus on it because I'm not I'm secure.

665
00:36:28,320 --> 00:36:30,279
Speaker 1: I don't care what you did. It is what it is.

666
00:36:30,560 --> 00:36:34,080
Speaker 1: If you want to be with me, then be with me.

667
00:36:34,200 --> 00:36:36,600
Speaker 1: And if you don't gonna be with somebody else, Like

668
00:36:36,719 --> 00:36:39,759
Speaker 1: it's just not that complicated. And if you want to

669
00:36:39,800 --> 00:36:41,440
Speaker 1: call me, if I want to call you fifty five

670
00:36:41,520 --> 00:36:44,279
Speaker 1: times a day, I'm going to call you fifty six

671
00:36:44,320 --> 00:36:47,480
Speaker 1: times a day. That's how something of Bailey rolls. And

672
00:36:47,520 --> 00:36:50,080
Speaker 1: if I don't feel like talking, I'm gonna say, hey,

673
00:36:50,280 --> 00:36:52,400
Speaker 1: I love you, babe. I don't feel like talking today.

674
00:36:52,600 --> 00:36:56,640
Speaker 1: Like I just think honesty and transparency and realness is

675
00:36:56,680 --> 00:36:59,200
Speaker 1: what really matters at the end of the day. And

676
00:36:59,200 --> 00:37:02,759
Speaker 1: then somebody's checking for you. They hear you because they

677
00:37:03,120 --> 00:37:04,920
Speaker 1: like you, but if they ain't really checking for you

678
00:37:04,960 --> 00:37:07,400
Speaker 1: that hard, they're gonna find a reason to not go

679
00:37:07,520 --> 00:37:12,000
Speaker 1: with whatever you're what, whatever you're trying to be honest about.

680
00:37:12,120 --> 00:37:13,279
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying, because at the end of

681
00:37:13,280 --> 00:37:15,200
Speaker 1: the day, if I'm telling you the truth and telling

682
00:37:15,200 --> 00:37:17,200
Speaker 1: you how I feel and I'm being vulnerable and putting

683
00:37:17,200 --> 00:37:19,759
Speaker 1: it out there and you use it against me in

684
00:37:19,800 --> 00:37:22,960
Speaker 1: some way, that's childish, that's stupid. That's playing games like

685
00:37:23,040 --> 00:37:25,120
Speaker 1: I don't. I don't like stuff like that, and I'm

686
00:37:25,120 --> 00:37:28,319
Speaker 1: not that girl. And again I feel like i'm I don't.

687
00:37:28,400 --> 00:37:29,759
Speaker 1: I can say I don't know who else. I do

688
00:37:29,880 --> 00:37:31,319
Speaker 1: know a lot of people who's been he's been with,

689
00:37:31,440 --> 00:37:34,600
Speaker 1: but I'm secure, I don't know if that was always

690
00:37:34,600 --> 00:37:37,960
Speaker 1: his experience. So the rules change when you're dealing with

691
00:37:38,000 --> 00:37:40,760
Speaker 1: someone that actually is curious. So then you gotta be like, Okay,

692
00:37:40,840 --> 00:37:43,440
Speaker 1: well this is different. She's not harassing me. She let

693
00:37:43,440 --> 00:37:45,480
Speaker 1: me hang out. Mike has like more girlfriends that he

694
00:37:45,520 --> 00:37:49,000
Speaker 1: has guy friends. I don't care. Yeah, and I know

695
00:37:49,120 --> 00:37:53,160
Speaker 1: him all like being around a lot of women, also

696
00:37:53,239 --> 00:37:56,279
Speaker 1: a flir. He's a lot of those things. But as

697
00:37:56,280 --> 00:37:59,960
Speaker 1: long as he's not disrespectful to me or being inappropriate,

698
00:38:00,480 --> 00:38:03,279
Speaker 1: if he's with me, I don't care. Do whatever you

699
00:38:03,280 --> 00:38:06,040
Speaker 1: gotta do to feel good. Brother, whatever you got going on,

700
00:38:06,320 --> 00:38:08,440
Speaker 1: ain't got nothing to do with me. What you need,

701
00:38:08,680 --> 00:38:10,920
Speaker 1: what you need to feel good, and got nothing to

702
00:38:10,960 --> 00:38:15,799
Speaker 1: do with me. So if um, you know, however you move,

703
00:38:15,880 --> 00:38:18,759
Speaker 1: as long as it's not disrespecting me, if you're with me,

704
00:38:19,680 --> 00:38:24,120
Speaker 1: we're good. Mm hmm. Now you know what's interesting social

705
00:38:24,120 --> 00:38:27,080
Speaker 1: media these days? And Cynthy, I know you have three

706
00:38:27,080 --> 00:38:30,040
Speaker 1: point three million followers on Instagram and it's it's a

707
00:38:30,120 --> 00:38:34,320
Speaker 1: popular culture thing. And to be very honest with you all,

708
00:38:34,440 --> 00:38:37,680
Speaker 1: I feel a little hopeless with where the culture is

709
00:38:37,800 --> 00:38:40,080
Speaker 1: when it comes to dating and social media and the

710
00:38:40,120 --> 00:38:43,600
Speaker 1: girls being half naked. And I'm recently out of a

711
00:38:43,680 --> 00:38:46,960
Speaker 1: relationship that I thought was gonna go the distance but

712
00:38:47,080 --> 00:38:49,840
Speaker 1: it didn't, and it it kind of made me feel

713
00:38:50,080 --> 00:38:54,080
Speaker 1: a bit bad about what dating may look like, uh

714
00:38:54,440 --> 00:38:56,640
Speaker 1: kind of moving forward and almost, like, to be honest

715
00:38:56,680 --> 00:38:59,640
Speaker 1: with you, I seemingly don't really want to date and

716
00:38:59,640 --> 00:39:02,480
Speaker 1: that's really the feeling that I get because it just

717
00:39:02,520 --> 00:39:04,799
Speaker 1: seems like it's a lot of trash out there and

718
00:39:05,520 --> 00:39:08,360
Speaker 1: women these days, at least from what I've seen in

719
00:39:08,400 --> 00:39:10,600
Speaker 1: a number of instances. I know that's not all women,

720
00:39:11,000 --> 00:39:13,440
Speaker 1: but it just seems like it's just a fast paced

721
00:39:13,600 --> 00:39:16,840
Speaker 1: kinda l a vibe and you know, how much money

722
00:39:16,840 --> 00:39:19,640
Speaker 1: do you have? What can you do for me? And

723
00:39:19,719 --> 00:39:23,359
Speaker 1: it's just it seems like a very toxic culture um

724
00:39:23,440 --> 00:39:26,279
Speaker 1: these days. What advice would with you both either you know?

725
00:39:26,400 --> 00:39:29,400
Speaker 1: Please both of you responded, is what advice would you

726
00:39:29,440 --> 00:39:32,040
Speaker 1: have for those who are interested in getting married and

727
00:39:32,080 --> 00:39:34,319
Speaker 1: feel hopeless? Because I'm almost feeling like, man, I don't

728
00:39:34,320 --> 00:39:36,439
Speaker 1: know if I'm gonna ever get married, and I'm thirty four,

729
00:39:36,960 --> 00:39:38,480
Speaker 1: and I feel like, you know, Mike, I know you've

730
00:39:38,480 --> 00:39:40,799
Speaker 1: been married a couple of a couple of times. I'm like,

731
00:39:40,840 --> 00:39:42,360
Speaker 1: my man has been married a couple of times. I

732
00:39:42,400 --> 00:39:46,160
Speaker 1: can't even get one, like what's going on all my

733
00:39:46,200 --> 00:39:49,120
Speaker 1: alimony payments. I appreciate that and all the money I've

734
00:39:49,120 --> 00:39:51,480
Speaker 1: lost over the years in a heartache, and thank you

735
00:39:51,560 --> 00:39:53,080
Speaker 1: for ripping off the band ai G. I know I

736
00:39:53,120 --> 00:39:56,920
Speaker 1: appreciate that, but go ahead, I'm sorry you got a

737
00:39:56,960 --> 00:40:00,000
Speaker 1: lot of advice to get we're being real, I would

738
00:40:00,000 --> 00:40:04,520
Speaker 1: you were here here well, first of all, first and foremost,

739
00:40:04,600 --> 00:40:07,680
Speaker 1: I was sad to hear that your last relationship didn't

740
00:40:07,680 --> 00:40:10,640
Speaker 1: work out. You know. Michael was kind of you know,

741
00:40:10,640 --> 00:40:12,480
Speaker 1: I was kind of hearing things from him, how it

742
00:40:12,600 --> 00:40:15,319
Speaker 1: happy you were, and it just seemed like it was

743
00:40:15,560 --> 00:40:18,440
Speaker 1: it was the one. And then when he said that,

744
00:40:18,480 --> 00:40:20,719
Speaker 1: you guys, it didn't work out, and I don't don't

745
00:40:20,719 --> 00:40:22,759
Speaker 1: even remember the reason, maybe didn't even tell him, I

746
00:40:22,760 --> 00:40:27,440
Speaker 1: can't remember, but whatever he told me didn't work out. So, um,

747
00:40:27,480 --> 00:40:29,400
Speaker 1: I was sad to hear that because it seemed like

748
00:40:29,440 --> 00:40:33,360
Speaker 1: you were happy, um with In regards to the question

749
00:40:33,440 --> 00:40:36,399
Speaker 1: that you're asking me, I would say to you, first

750
00:40:36,440 --> 00:40:40,200
Speaker 1: of all, don't let you know the fact when things

751
00:40:40,239 --> 00:40:45,640
Speaker 1: don't work out, sometimes it's a good thing because that

752
00:40:45,680 --> 00:40:47,520
Speaker 1: person could be in the way of the person that

753
00:40:47,600 --> 00:40:50,680
Speaker 1: you're supposed to be with when it happens, you know

754
00:40:50,719 --> 00:40:53,680
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. So that's just part of your journey,

755
00:40:53,920 --> 00:40:56,239
Speaker 1: that's part of whatever you whatever. Take the good of,

756
00:40:56,360 --> 00:40:58,840
Speaker 1: whatever the good was, let you know, let it be

757
00:40:58,880 --> 00:41:02,919
Speaker 1: a teachable moment, whatever, and go into this next thing

758
00:41:03,040 --> 00:41:06,200
Speaker 1: whenever it HAPs definitely a teachable moment, that's for sure.

759
00:41:08,960 --> 00:41:13,839
Speaker 1: You write about that one. I got notes learn you're

760
00:41:13,880 --> 00:41:19,040
Speaker 1: gonna learnt trust me notes well, but but don't but

761
00:41:19,120 --> 00:41:21,960
Speaker 1: don't let you know. We all have been through relationships

762
00:41:21,960 --> 00:41:24,440
Speaker 1: that didn't maybe end the way that we would have

763
00:41:24,480 --> 00:41:26,879
Speaker 1: liked for them to end. But please don't like put

764
00:41:27,080 --> 00:41:30,520
Speaker 1: bring that into the new situation when that's become a situation,

765
00:41:30,880 --> 00:41:33,279
Speaker 1: because that's not fair to the new person, you know

766
00:41:33,280 --> 00:41:35,799
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. But I would say, in terms of

767
00:41:35,840 --> 00:41:39,799
Speaker 1: social media, you gotta figure out what you what you

768
00:41:39,840 --> 00:41:41,520
Speaker 1: what you want? You know what I mean. There's a

769
00:41:41,520 --> 00:41:44,040
Speaker 1: lot of temptation out there on social media. There's a

770
00:41:44,040 --> 00:41:47,879
Speaker 1: lot of beautiful women out there on social media there,

771
00:41:48,040 --> 00:41:50,319
Speaker 1: some of them good, some come in peace, and some

772
00:41:50,440 --> 00:41:54,480
Speaker 1: come with bad intentions. So I would say, you gotta

773
00:41:54,560 --> 00:41:57,480
Speaker 1: figure out. You gotta figure out what you want and

774
00:41:57,520 --> 00:41:59,520
Speaker 1: what you're looking for. You know what I'm saying. If

775
00:41:59,520 --> 00:42:04,040
Speaker 1: you just want, you know, some eye candy, just something

776
00:42:04,080 --> 00:42:06,040
Speaker 1: to look good at, somebody with a bunch of following,

777
00:42:06,120 --> 00:42:08,040
Speaker 1: somebody with a bunch of likes and all that stuff,

778
00:42:08,160 --> 00:42:10,200
Speaker 1: you gotta figure out what you really are looking for.

779
00:42:10,680 --> 00:42:13,360
Speaker 1: And I feel like once you kind of figured that out.

780
00:42:13,400 --> 00:42:16,960
Speaker 1: Like take your time and like be selective because you

781
00:42:17,040 --> 00:42:20,160
Speaker 1: gotta remember you are a prize as well, you know

782
00:42:20,200 --> 00:42:23,920
Speaker 1: what I'm saying, So who not only look for what

783
00:42:23,960 --> 00:42:27,879
Speaker 1: you want, but who deserves you? You know? Who told

784
00:42:27,920 --> 00:42:30,120
Speaker 1: me that on social media you might be able to

785
00:42:30,120 --> 00:42:32,400
Speaker 1: find on social media because I'm not gonna I'm not

786
00:42:32,480 --> 00:42:36,640
Speaker 1: going to rule that out. But it's so funny because

787
00:42:36,680 --> 00:42:38,799
Speaker 1: you just said that you are a prize as well,

788
00:42:38,880 --> 00:42:41,240
Speaker 1: and someone told me that just two weeks ago, my

789
00:42:41,239 --> 00:42:43,960
Speaker 1: my sister And now who's a part of your franchise,

790
00:42:44,000 --> 00:42:47,040
Speaker 1: Anie Kate Williams. She was saying, listen, Giano, you a

791
00:42:47,160 --> 00:42:49,360
Speaker 1: prize as well. You gotta keep that in mind. And

792
00:42:49,360 --> 00:42:53,000
Speaker 1: I think that's important for guys to know, as the

793
00:42:53,239 --> 00:42:55,839
Speaker 1: folks who are listening when you pursue women know your

794
00:42:55,920 --> 00:42:58,400
Speaker 1: value as well. Yeah, yeah, when you know who you

795
00:42:58,440 --> 00:43:00,720
Speaker 1: are and you know what and I'm saying you don't.

796
00:43:01,000 --> 00:43:03,120
Speaker 1: I think sometimes when it comes like you can have

797
00:43:03,200 --> 00:43:05,480
Speaker 1: your stuff just like a woman kid, you could have

798
00:43:05,560 --> 00:43:07,960
Speaker 1: everything together and then when it comes to the affairs

799
00:43:07,960 --> 00:43:10,640
Speaker 1: of the heart, just end up being a fool basically,

800
00:43:10,840 --> 00:43:13,759
Speaker 1: you know what I mean? Just love? Can you know fools? Water,

801
00:43:13,840 --> 00:43:16,759
Speaker 1: fools fall in love. You know what I'm saying. You

802
00:43:16,840 --> 00:43:21,080
Speaker 1: have to just be just as focused and strategic and

803
00:43:21,200 --> 00:43:24,040
Speaker 1: your personal life as you are in your professional life

804
00:43:24,400 --> 00:43:26,239
Speaker 1: when it comes to what you want and what you

805
00:43:26,280 --> 00:43:28,319
Speaker 1: don't want, and when you sit when you see those

806
00:43:28,360 --> 00:43:32,120
Speaker 1: signs come up when you meet somebody, Because there are signs, brother,

807
00:43:32,920 --> 00:43:37,839
Speaker 1: now you can acknowledge them, you know. Science. That's where

808
00:43:37,880 --> 00:43:40,280
Speaker 1: you need to fall back a little bit and be like, wait, okay,

809
00:43:40,280 --> 00:43:44,040
Speaker 1: now what is that? What is that that feeling you get?

810
00:43:44,080 --> 00:43:45,920
Speaker 1: We're like, oh, that didn't really feel right? Non't here?

811
00:43:46,040 --> 00:43:49,320
Speaker 1: Right up? Pay attention to that, you know what I'm saying,

812
00:43:49,360 --> 00:43:52,800
Speaker 1: because it means something. If you feel something, it means something.

813
00:43:53,520 --> 00:43:56,839
Speaker 1: And and just be honest with yourself. If you want

814
00:43:56,840 --> 00:44:00,640
Speaker 1: a nice girl, look for a nice girl. If you

815
00:44:00,680 --> 00:44:03,279
Speaker 1: want a boss, look for a boss. If you want

816
00:44:03,280 --> 00:44:06,000
Speaker 1: an Instagram thought, go live your happy life with the

817
00:44:06,080 --> 00:44:11,120
Speaker 1: Instagram thought looking for don't want the temptations and the

818
00:44:11,120 --> 00:44:13,520
Speaker 1: distractions of Instagram thought, and then really want to be

819
00:44:13,600 --> 00:44:16,479
Speaker 1: overre with somebody classy. No, it doesn't work like that.

820
00:44:16,880 --> 00:44:20,840
Speaker 1: Do do you figure out what you really want? Because

821
00:44:21,239 --> 00:44:24,480
Speaker 1: the two are not the same. The two are not

822
00:44:24,560 --> 00:44:29,040
Speaker 1: the same, be honest with yourself absolutely, And for those

823
00:44:29,080 --> 00:44:32,120
Speaker 1: who may not know, a thought is a loose woman

824
00:44:32,760 --> 00:44:40,319
Speaker 1: in kind terms over there, but this is you know,

825
00:44:40,400 --> 00:44:54,640
Speaker 1: your audience, babies, it's just like just still, you know, okay, thought?

826
00:44:54,680 --> 00:44:57,640
Speaker 1: Then he has to give the definition of a thought

827
00:44:57,760 --> 00:45:05,359
Speaker 1: a lose lose lady. Eat. Okay, that's question. No, I'll

828
00:45:05,400 --> 00:45:09,920
Speaker 1: just let you talk. You realize perspective. Well, I'm not

829
00:45:09,920 --> 00:45:13,600
Speaker 1: gonna be able to finish my thought anyway. So it's saying,

830
00:45:15,239 --> 00:45:17,640
Speaker 1: go ahead, Mike, go ahead, Mike, and Cynthia, I'm enjoying

831
00:45:17,680 --> 00:45:19,840
Speaker 1: your your commentary. Thank you so much. Mike. What are

832
00:45:19,880 --> 00:45:22,279
Speaker 1: your thoughts? This popular culture is so important now and

833
00:45:22,320 --> 00:45:24,719
Speaker 1: it it seems as though a lot of people lead

834
00:45:24,880 --> 00:45:29,359
Speaker 1: with Instagram these days. They don't lead with how can

835
00:45:29,440 --> 00:45:31,080
Speaker 1: we get to know each other? Can I take you

836
00:45:31,080 --> 00:45:33,839
Speaker 1: on a date? Can I be a gentleman? And it's like, oh,

837
00:45:33,880 --> 00:45:36,560
Speaker 1: how many followers do you have on Instagram? As though

838
00:45:36,680 --> 00:45:38,880
Speaker 1: that that determines you're prominent on how you're going to

839
00:45:38,920 --> 00:45:41,160
Speaker 1: treat a person, and it's it's become a very toxic,

840
00:45:41,760 --> 00:45:45,000
Speaker 1: toxic culture. In my opinion, you can meet on candy

841
00:45:45,040 --> 00:45:47,120
Speaker 1: on Instagram. I don't know if you're gonna meet your wife,

842
00:45:47,400 --> 00:45:48,920
Speaker 1: I don't know if you're gonna meet you your your

843
00:45:49,000 --> 00:45:52,840
Speaker 1: queen necessarily on Instagram. There are different ways obviously that

844
00:45:52,880 --> 00:45:55,640
Speaker 1: you can meet people through dating apps, through Instagram. Social

845
00:45:55,640 --> 00:45:59,400
Speaker 1: media is huge these days, obviously, But you know what

846
00:45:59,719 --> 00:46:02,359
Speaker 1: about old school ways of doing things? I mean, and

847
00:46:02,400 --> 00:46:04,960
Speaker 1: it's not just about the pictures. It's not about the looks.

848
00:46:04,960 --> 00:46:07,400
Speaker 1: It's not about how many lights that they have or

849
00:46:07,440 --> 00:46:10,480
Speaker 1: how many times that they can throw out these pictures

850
00:46:10,480 --> 00:46:12,560
Speaker 1: out there on their stories, on their on their posts

851
00:46:13,120 --> 00:46:16,520
Speaker 1: and and throw face tune on to it, and and

852
00:46:16,560 --> 00:46:20,400
Speaker 1: they know their angles. But how about getting to know somebody,

853
00:46:20,800 --> 00:46:24,160
Speaker 1: being able to talk to somebody, getting to feel somebody.

854
00:46:24,280 --> 00:46:26,640
Speaker 1: Uh As as Cynthia was talking about, You're not gonna

855
00:46:26,640 --> 00:46:29,279
Speaker 1: find somebody who's perfect. You're never gonna find a perfect woman.

856
00:46:29,320 --> 00:46:32,080
Speaker 1: You just need to find somebody's perfect for you. And

857
00:46:32,320 --> 00:46:34,719
Speaker 1: like everybody told you, like I tell my daughters all

858
00:46:34,760 --> 00:46:37,680
Speaker 1: the time, you know you're worth You know you are

859
00:46:37,719 --> 00:46:40,520
Speaker 1: a king. If you feel like you're a king, you

860
00:46:40,560 --> 00:46:44,360
Speaker 1: need to be with somebody who is a queen and

861
00:46:44,480 --> 00:46:47,040
Speaker 1: vice versa. And if you find yourself a queen, you

862
00:46:47,080 --> 00:46:48,919
Speaker 1: need to be worthy of the crown that you said

863
00:46:48,920 --> 00:46:50,920
Speaker 1: that you're gonna put on your on your head yourself,

864
00:46:51,239 --> 00:46:54,239
Speaker 1: so you gotta act that way. Bottom line is, man,

865
00:46:54,320 --> 00:46:57,799
Speaker 1: look you know, um, you just have to go out

866
00:46:57,840 --> 00:47:01,920
Speaker 1: there and and be encouraged, be discouraged. Everything happens for

867
00:47:01,960 --> 00:47:05,000
Speaker 1: a reason. What you went through with that young lady

868
00:47:05,120 --> 00:47:08,480
Speaker 1: happen for a reason. It allows you to grow, uh,

869
00:47:08,520 --> 00:47:11,040
Speaker 1: and it's gonna prepare you for life to come in

870
00:47:11,120 --> 00:47:13,520
Speaker 1: one way or another with the next person that you're with.

871
00:47:13,840 --> 00:47:17,040
Speaker 1: But when you go into your next relationship, make sure

872
00:47:17,040 --> 00:47:19,440
Speaker 1: you go into your next relationship as a whole person.

873
00:47:19,760 --> 00:47:22,120
Speaker 1: So you can go intore looking for somebody that is

874
00:47:22,920 --> 00:47:25,560
Speaker 1: perfect or somebody that's great and this whole and has

875
00:47:25,640 --> 00:47:29,239
Speaker 1: everything to offer, but make sure that you are prepared

876
00:47:29,520 --> 00:47:33,200
Speaker 1: first before that happens. And I always say that your

877
00:47:33,520 --> 00:47:36,959
Speaker 1: best relationships are between two people who are a whole.

878
00:47:37,400 --> 00:47:40,719
Speaker 1: And on my analogy is you can take a two

879
00:47:40,800 --> 00:47:43,359
Speaker 1: layer cake. You can have that first layer, it's got

880
00:47:43,360 --> 00:47:46,160
Speaker 1: to be perfectly rounded, right. That means that cake is whole,

881
00:47:46,560 --> 00:47:49,239
Speaker 1: and the other layer has to be perfectly rounded. That

882
00:47:49,320 --> 00:47:51,479
Speaker 1: cake is whole, and then you stack them on top.

883
00:47:51,560 --> 00:47:53,440
Speaker 1: Everything that you create on top of that is like

884
00:47:53,480 --> 00:47:56,920
Speaker 1: the icing on the cake, literally pretty much and figuratively right.

885
00:47:57,040 --> 00:47:59,640
Speaker 1: But if you've got somebody who isn't whole or they're

886
00:47:59,640 --> 00:48:02,520
Speaker 1: missing something, a slice that's not gonna look the same.

887
00:48:02,760 --> 00:48:07,040
Speaker 1: So then you find yourself supplementing, uh, something that you're

888
00:48:07,080 --> 00:48:10,440
Speaker 1: looking for in a relationship because you're missing something, so

889
00:48:10,480 --> 00:48:12,520
Speaker 1: you're taking that from that person, and that then that

890
00:48:12,520 --> 00:48:15,080
Speaker 1: person takes that away from you. Then you're longing for

891
00:48:15,120 --> 00:48:18,000
Speaker 1: that person, and that person might not be necessarily right

892
00:48:18,080 --> 00:48:21,359
Speaker 1: for you. So once again, y'ano, don't be discouraged by

893
00:48:21,520 --> 00:48:23,880
Speaker 1: don't say you know, social media is out there and

894
00:48:23,880 --> 00:48:26,480
Speaker 1: I can't find a woman because I'm sliding somebody's d ms.

895
00:48:26,520 --> 00:48:29,319
Speaker 1: They're sliding in my dms. You know. I know it's

896
00:48:29,360 --> 00:48:31,520
Speaker 1: Corona and COVID and you're not able to get out

897
00:48:31,520 --> 00:48:34,279
Speaker 1: and socialize. But get out socialized and meet somebody, and

898
00:48:34,280 --> 00:48:38,400
Speaker 1: then then they might necessarily not necessarily look like Holly Berry.

899
00:48:38,520 --> 00:48:40,719
Speaker 1: They might not be the perfect tin, But there ain't

900
00:48:40,760 --> 00:48:43,640
Speaker 1: nothing wrong with a good eight and a great personality

901
00:48:44,040 --> 00:48:47,759
Speaker 1: and a spiritual person and somebody who loves and respects

902
00:48:47,880 --> 00:48:50,560
Speaker 1: and honors you. And then all of a sudden, that

903
00:48:50,680 --> 00:48:53,360
Speaker 1: eight that you saw before turns out to be the

904
00:48:53,400 --> 00:48:55,120
Speaker 1: tin that you need. I want to pick up from

905
00:48:55,120 --> 00:49:01,160
Speaker 1: there at the moment, but first let's go to break. Now,

906
00:49:01,239 --> 00:49:06,920
Speaker 1: let's be clear saying like options I got low list,

907
00:49:09,360 --> 00:49:11,879
Speaker 1: you may not get a T, but you can get

908
00:49:11,880 --> 00:49:15,879
Speaker 1: a three and a half and uh. People. But see,

909
00:49:15,920 --> 00:49:18,840
Speaker 1: the thing is like everybody's everybody's looking for that woman

910
00:49:18,960 --> 00:49:22,000
Speaker 1: that is out there, that it's that Instagram model and

911
00:49:22,400 --> 00:49:26,040
Speaker 1: everybody wants him whatever, you know, but sometimes those women

912
00:49:26,120 --> 00:49:28,360
Speaker 1: aren't prepared for you, that they're not the right woman

913
00:49:28,440 --> 00:49:30,799
Speaker 1: for you. Just because if I agree with that, I

914
00:49:30,800 --> 00:49:33,399
Speaker 1: don't think everybody's looking for an Instagram model. I think

915
00:49:33,400 --> 00:49:35,240
Speaker 1: there's a lot of man out here that are looking

916
00:49:35,320 --> 00:49:39,239
Speaker 1: for a successful woman that has her own stuff going on,

917
00:49:39,360 --> 00:49:42,200
Speaker 1: that's looking for a boss. You know. That's that's that

918
00:49:42,239 --> 00:49:44,640
Speaker 1: would be me. That's what you ain't got, Like no

919
00:49:44,760 --> 00:49:48,160
Speaker 1: Instagram model, Um, just somebody that has it going on,

920
00:49:48,239 --> 00:49:51,400
Speaker 1: somebody that you have some kind of connection with. Uh.

921
00:49:51,640 --> 00:49:53,919
Speaker 1: But I would say I would say this, I think

922
00:49:54,040 --> 00:49:55,920
Speaker 1: I agree with a lot of things that Mike said.

923
00:49:56,480 --> 00:49:58,520
Speaker 1: But if you're going to go to the Gram and

924
00:49:58,560 --> 00:49:59,920
Speaker 1: a lot of times a lot of people don't have

925
00:50:00,040 --> 00:50:01,800
Speaker 1: lot of other options. But to go to the Graham,

926
00:50:02,080 --> 00:50:06,120
Speaker 1: I would definitely played by your own rules. Shorten a

927
00:50:06,200 --> 00:50:08,920
Speaker 1: betting process. You know what I'm saying. If you meet somebody,

928
00:50:08,920 --> 00:50:11,440
Speaker 1: if you somebody seems like they're interested in you, and

929
00:50:11,480 --> 00:50:14,120
Speaker 1: you guys, get some kind of dialogue and dams, cut

930
00:50:14,160 --> 00:50:18,200
Speaker 1: the damns out quickly. Okay, I'm not gonna be sitting

931
00:50:18,239 --> 00:50:20,760
Speaker 1: up dam and no food for three or four weeks

932
00:50:20,760 --> 00:50:23,520
Speaker 1: and months. No, you don't want to get you're in

933
00:50:23,560 --> 00:50:26,400
Speaker 1: my damns. That means you're telling me that you're interested

934
00:50:26,440 --> 00:50:29,239
Speaker 1: in some way. So what do you want and communicate?

935
00:50:29,320 --> 00:50:31,680
Speaker 1: Stop the texting to I'm not gonna do that. You're

936
00:50:31,680 --> 00:50:34,120
Speaker 1: not gonna text me. I'm get if I gave my

937
00:50:34,120 --> 00:50:37,960
Speaker 1: phone number, call me and then let's talk. And if

938
00:50:37,960 --> 00:50:39,520
Speaker 1: you ain't talking about none, if you don't like what

939
00:50:39,560 --> 00:50:42,160
Speaker 1: I'm talking about, then you don't have to lose You

940
00:50:42,200 --> 00:50:43,759
Speaker 1: don't have to lose it because I'm just gonna block you.

941
00:50:43,800 --> 00:50:46,840
Speaker 1: And that's what I don't understand people out here on

942
00:50:46,920 --> 00:50:48,960
Speaker 1: one of DM they want to text. They don't even

943
00:50:48,960 --> 00:50:50,759
Speaker 1: ask for phone numbers these days. It's like, what's your

944
00:50:50,800 --> 00:50:53,600
Speaker 1: I G that's that's what That's what a lot of

945
00:50:53,640 --> 00:50:57,880
Speaker 1: people are doing. These days. Secret I'm on Instagram. I

946
00:50:57,920 --> 00:51:01,880
Speaker 1: have quite a few followers. I've had men sliding my dams.

947
00:51:02,280 --> 00:51:07,239
Speaker 1: Any any famous when you and if I feel like

948
00:51:07,280 --> 00:51:09,480
Speaker 1: I want to get to know you, I'm going to

949
00:51:09,520 --> 00:51:12,960
Speaker 1: give you my phone upp. If I'm not checking for

950
00:51:13,000 --> 00:51:15,879
Speaker 1: you and I'm playing games and I got ten other

951
00:51:15,880 --> 00:51:18,040
Speaker 1: guys in my d MS, I'm kind of wearing my options.

952
00:51:18,160 --> 00:51:20,239
Speaker 1: I'm not going to give you my phone up. But

953
00:51:20,280 --> 00:51:22,800
Speaker 1: if I'm interested, I'll give you. I'll give you my

954
00:51:22,880 --> 00:51:25,279
Speaker 1: number and say, hey, but why are you? Why men

955
00:51:25,320 --> 00:51:27,239
Speaker 1: sliding in d ms when they have an opportunity to

956
00:51:27,280 --> 00:51:29,279
Speaker 1: meet that person face to face, A lot of times

957
00:51:29,320 --> 00:51:33,120
Speaker 1: they could be right in that person's face state, but no, well,

958
00:51:33,160 --> 00:51:34,760
Speaker 1: I mean, if they're in a different state. I understand

959
00:51:34,760 --> 00:51:36,440
Speaker 1: that we've got a lot of suitors out there because

960
00:51:36,480 --> 00:51:39,000
Speaker 1: you know all your your thoughts. You know, we already

961
00:51:39,000 --> 00:51:40,440
Speaker 1: know what thoughts me, and we don't have to explain

962
00:51:40,480 --> 00:51:44,160
Speaker 1: that anymore. We have to explained that anymore. So it

963
00:51:44,320 --> 00:51:46,400
Speaker 1: is the thing. But you know the thing is, if

964
00:51:46,480 --> 00:51:48,400
Speaker 1: I'm in the same space with you, I'm in the

965
00:51:48,440 --> 00:51:51,160
Speaker 1: same city, and I've been in the same room with you,

966
00:51:51,239 --> 00:51:53,000
Speaker 1: and I met you that night, why am I sliding

967
00:51:53,000 --> 00:51:54,959
Speaker 1: any your d MS instead of talking to you face

968
00:51:55,000 --> 00:51:56,800
Speaker 1: to face and getting to know you and getting the

969
00:51:56,880 --> 00:52:00,080
Speaker 1: vibe with you and finding maybe finding a connect you

970
00:52:00,320 --> 00:52:03,440
Speaker 1: right away and then once I do talk to you,

971
00:52:03,480 --> 00:52:06,040
Speaker 1: if I reach out to you because I didn't meet

972
00:52:06,040 --> 00:52:07,680
Speaker 1: you in person, I meet you through d M. You

973
00:52:07,719 --> 00:52:10,120
Speaker 1: send me your number. I'm not texting you over and

974
00:52:10,200 --> 00:52:14,439
Speaker 1: over and over again. I'm calling you. We're having a conversation. Yeah,

975
00:52:14,440 --> 00:52:16,600
Speaker 1: I don't. I don't feel like if I meet you

976
00:52:16,680 --> 00:52:18,440
Speaker 1: right away, I'm going to meet in person because I

977
00:52:18,480 --> 00:52:19,839
Speaker 1: want to get to know you a little bit better.

978
00:52:19,880 --> 00:52:23,000
Speaker 1: I'm big on talking on the phone, not texting, but

979
00:52:23,120 --> 00:52:25,719
Speaker 1: having phone conversation and then when I get a little comfortable,

980
00:52:26,000 --> 00:52:28,680
Speaker 1: I'm big on face timing with you so I can

981
00:52:28,760 --> 00:52:37,560
Speaker 1: just kind of seeing a house. Let me ask you

982
00:52:37,560 --> 00:52:40,080
Speaker 1: all about this. Y'all familiar with a brother by the

983
00:52:40,160 --> 00:52:42,800
Speaker 1: name of Kevin Samuels. He has a big YouTube channel,

984
00:52:42,800 --> 00:52:44,960
Speaker 1: big following. I've been trying to get him on the podcast.

985
00:52:45,000 --> 00:52:48,880
Speaker 1: He talks about relationships quite frequently and he often mentioned

986
00:52:49,160 --> 00:52:52,480
Speaker 1: high value men. He talks about what a high value

987
00:52:52,520 --> 00:52:54,759
Speaker 1: man wants, and he wants a woman that's gonna be

988
00:52:54,800 --> 00:52:58,920
Speaker 1: submissive to him, and he talks about if you're if

989
00:52:58,960 --> 00:53:01,319
Speaker 1: you're a high value man, and then women shouldn't pay

990
00:53:01,360 --> 00:53:04,480
Speaker 1: for anything. He says he feels insulted if a woman

991
00:53:04,560 --> 00:53:09,880
Speaker 1: chooses to try to try to pay for anything, a meal, rent, mortgage, anything.

992
00:53:10,719 --> 00:53:13,120
Speaker 1: Y'all familiar with Kevin Timmys, y'all agree with some of

993
00:53:13,120 --> 00:53:20,560
Speaker 1: that rhetoric about sister, you know, like I need yeah

994
00:53:20,600 --> 00:53:24,120
Speaker 1: stands for now. I do now. I do think a

995
00:53:24,200 --> 00:53:28,000
Speaker 1: man should be prepared to pay for those things if

996
00:53:28,000 --> 00:53:30,960
Speaker 1: he asks a woman out. But here's my rule, and

997
00:53:31,000 --> 00:53:33,000
Speaker 1: this is you know, obviously I'm married now, so I'm

998
00:53:33,040 --> 00:53:35,719
Speaker 1: not looking. I'm not out there before anymore. But when

999
00:53:35,760 --> 00:53:39,360
Speaker 1: I was dating, if I asked you out, I'm definitely

1000
00:53:39,400 --> 00:53:41,640
Speaker 1: paying for the first meal. I'm paying for the second meal.

1001
00:53:41,719 --> 00:53:43,759
Speaker 1: More likely I'm taking care of all that. But if

1002
00:53:43,800 --> 00:53:45,960
Speaker 1: we go out, we continue to go out by the

1003
00:53:46,080 --> 00:53:49,520
Speaker 1: third or fourth meal. If you don't even fame or

1004
00:53:49,920 --> 00:53:53,000
Speaker 1: fake like you're going for the bill or say something like,

1005
00:53:53,040 --> 00:53:56,279
Speaker 1: oh you always pay, Let me buy you dessert, let

1006
00:53:56,280 --> 00:53:58,800
Speaker 1: me buy you a drink, let me make you dinner.

1007
00:53:59,320 --> 00:54:02,080
Speaker 1: I'm wondering. I really am wondering now, and I'm an

1008
00:54:02,120 --> 00:54:04,000
Speaker 1: old school guy and not get that or whatever. But

1009
00:54:04,040 --> 00:54:06,120
Speaker 1: at the same time, I want to see that the

1010
00:54:06,200 --> 00:54:09,959
Speaker 1: woman is with me for more than just a foodie call.

1011
00:54:10,400 --> 00:54:13,920
Speaker 1: And that is and l A is like that a

1012
00:54:13,920 --> 00:54:16,239
Speaker 1: lot women they are going on dates with guys just

1013
00:54:16,280 --> 00:54:18,960
Speaker 1: for food foodiecause that's what they call them, foodie calls.

1014
00:54:19,160 --> 00:54:21,319
Speaker 1: It ain't a booty call. It's a booty call. I

1015
00:54:21,320 --> 00:54:24,680
Speaker 1: can't even wrap my head around that. That's just I

1016
00:54:24,760 --> 00:54:27,719
Speaker 1: just yeah, that's because for his birthday, you running head,

1017
00:54:27,800 --> 00:54:32,040
Speaker 1: de private chef a whole admit for the brothers understood,

1018
00:54:32,080 --> 00:54:34,759
Speaker 1: you have value woman, So I get that. Now, let

1019
00:54:34,760 --> 00:54:36,719
Speaker 1: me ask you all this because I know how much

1020
00:54:36,760 --> 00:54:39,640
Speaker 1: time with y'all is. We're recording on a Friday night.

1021
00:54:39,719 --> 00:54:42,279
Speaker 1: This comes out on Monday, so y'all got things to

1022
00:54:42,320 --> 00:54:44,799
Speaker 1: do and it's kind of late. But what do you

1023
00:54:44,840 --> 00:54:47,319
Speaker 1: think are the most important things that make a relationship

1024
00:54:47,800 --> 00:54:54,360
Speaker 1: and a marriage last? What are those? Honesty? Trust, trust, compatibility,

1025
00:54:54,480 --> 00:54:59,600
Speaker 1: commitment and and and and and willing to work out

1026
00:55:00,160 --> 00:55:03,319
Speaker 1: differences and understand that they're going to be issues in

1027
00:55:03,360 --> 00:55:06,920
Speaker 1: your relationship. Yeah, and friendship. Friendship, you gotta be friends

1028
00:55:06,920 --> 00:55:10,759
Speaker 1: with your you have to like your husband, you gotta

1029
00:55:10,800 --> 00:55:13,640
Speaker 1: love them and you gotta like them two different things.

1030
00:55:13,640 --> 00:55:16,000
Speaker 1: You ain't gonna like them all the time, but like

1031
00:55:16,120 --> 00:55:17,480
Speaker 1: most of the time, you gotta like them most of

1032
00:55:17,520 --> 00:55:19,840
Speaker 1: the time, and you gotta be well. Once again, I

1033
00:55:19,840 --> 00:55:23,120
Speaker 1: think working through the issues that you have and finding

1034
00:55:23,200 --> 00:55:26,520
Speaker 1: somebody that is worth working through those issues. When you do,

1035
00:55:26,600 --> 00:55:28,200
Speaker 1: when you do that, that's when you I think when

1036
00:55:28,200 --> 00:55:31,359
Speaker 1: you're in love. I really do. Yeah, I agree. I

1037
00:55:31,400 --> 00:55:34,560
Speaker 1: agree with that. Um, everyone you know my cast is issues.

1038
00:55:34,840 --> 00:55:38,040
Speaker 1: I have my issues. You're not getting Thanks for saying that. Well,

1039
00:55:38,040 --> 00:55:41,160
Speaker 1: it's the truth both of us. I said, you had

1040
00:55:41,200 --> 00:55:42,560
Speaker 1: yours and I happen. I don't know if he was

1041
00:55:42,560 --> 00:55:44,759
Speaker 1: going to say your other part though, that's what I'm saying.

1042
00:55:44,800 --> 00:55:47,560
Speaker 1: I don't know. We both everyone has issues. We do

1043
00:55:47,680 --> 00:55:50,520
Speaker 1: okay whatever those issues are. Some may have more issues

1044
00:55:50,560 --> 00:55:53,400
Speaker 1: than the next person. But everyone has issues. You have

1045
00:55:53,520 --> 00:55:56,200
Speaker 1: to decide, you know. I want to know, Like when

1046
00:55:56,200 --> 00:55:58,360
Speaker 1: I get to know someone, I don't want to just

1047
00:55:58,400 --> 00:55:59,920
Speaker 1: want to know the good things about Tell me to

1048
00:56:00,040 --> 00:56:02,560
Speaker 1: asta and so so I can know if I want

1049
00:56:02,560 --> 00:56:05,840
Speaker 1: to sign off sign up for that. Tell me the

1050
00:56:05,920 --> 00:56:12,360
Speaker 1: bad stuff? What are your what are the flaws? Because

1051
00:56:12,600 --> 00:56:14,120
Speaker 1: I need to know if I want to hang around

1052
00:56:14,120 --> 00:56:18,400
Speaker 1: for the flaws, around for the good stuff. Tell me

1053
00:56:18,440 --> 00:56:22,480
Speaker 1: the bad stuff. What's your worst thing about you? What's

1054
00:56:22,480 --> 00:56:27,240
Speaker 1: your weakness? What what you know? What are your deal breakers?

1055
00:56:27,840 --> 00:56:29,640
Speaker 1: What are your dealings? You know? For me, my deal

1056
00:56:29,680 --> 00:56:32,720
Speaker 1: breakers are I'm definitely not going to be with someone

1057
00:56:33,760 --> 00:56:40,400
Speaker 1: who is who I can't trust. I just can't. I

1058
00:56:40,400 --> 00:56:43,160
Speaker 1: don't have time. I can't do it. I cannot do it.

1059
00:56:43,239 --> 00:56:47,719
Speaker 1: I cannot do it. So I gotta feel comfortable. You

1060
00:56:47,760 --> 00:56:50,000
Speaker 1: can't make me feel comfortable. We can't be together. I

1061
00:56:50,000 --> 00:56:54,759
Speaker 1: gotta feel um peace. You don't bring me peace. We

1062
00:56:54,800 --> 00:56:59,839
Speaker 1: can't rob It's not gonna happen. So, yeah, issues like

1063
00:57:00,080 --> 00:57:06,319
Speaker 1: what are you willing to ride with somebody on or

1064
00:57:06,360 --> 00:57:10,920
Speaker 1: with through through? What are you willing to do because

1065
00:57:10,920 --> 00:57:13,480
Speaker 1: some stuff you may not want to be like you

1066
00:57:13,480 --> 00:57:15,640
Speaker 1: know what, I just ain't gonna be able to do

1067
00:57:15,680 --> 00:57:18,000
Speaker 1: the like that's one of your things. Like it. Mike said,

1068
00:57:18,280 --> 00:57:26,360
Speaker 1: this is an extreme example, and Mike said, Um, I

1069
00:57:26,400 --> 00:57:31,800
Speaker 1: like doing cocaine. Wait a minute, is this a confession

1070
00:57:33,760 --> 00:57:36,800
Speaker 1: because I've never seen it? But tell us, Mike, do

1071
00:57:36,920 --> 00:57:41,680
Speaker 1: you like cocaine. I'm just gonna call you cocaine. This

1072
00:57:42,880 --> 00:57:47,360
Speaker 1: is I've never used cocaine in my life, right, so

1073
00:57:47,480 --> 00:57:50,800
Speaker 1: even if he I know this is a hypothetical, but

1074
00:57:50,920 --> 00:57:53,080
Speaker 1: to say he did have you know, because people do

1075
00:57:53,520 --> 00:57:56,000
Speaker 1: you know, people are on drugs and stuff, all right,

1076
00:57:57,000 --> 00:58:00,120
Speaker 1: I would say, do I want to do it with that?

1077
00:58:00,480 --> 00:58:02,320
Speaker 1: You wouldn't help me get cleaned up? Baby? I mean

1078
00:58:02,360 --> 00:58:05,760
Speaker 1: I could. I could say, Hey, you know what, I'm

1079
00:58:05,760 --> 00:58:08,640
Speaker 1: gonna see you through this, help you get off cocaine,

1080
00:58:08,760 --> 00:58:10,520
Speaker 1: and I'm gonna be there with you. I'm gonna go

1081
00:58:10,560 --> 00:58:13,800
Speaker 1: to cocaine anonymous with you and all that stuff. You

1082
00:58:13,840 --> 00:58:17,560
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying. But I have to ask myself

1083
00:58:18,680 --> 00:58:20,480
Speaker 1: do I want to do I want to go through?

1084
00:58:21,200 --> 00:58:23,200
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying. I dated somebody that is

1085
00:58:23,200 --> 00:58:29,680
Speaker 1: an alcoholic, and at one point he wanted to date again,

1086
00:58:30,600 --> 00:58:38,200
Speaker 1: and he cannot drink because he's an alcoholic. I like

1087
00:58:38,360 --> 00:58:43,960
Speaker 1: to drink, and I didn't feel like I don't want

1088
00:58:43,960 --> 00:58:46,280
Speaker 1: to not drink around him because he's an alcoholic. That's

1089
00:58:46,280 --> 00:58:48,480
Speaker 1: this problem. You know what I'm saying, I want to

1090
00:58:48,480 --> 00:58:51,360
Speaker 1: go to the restaurant and order margarita. But now I

1091
00:58:51,400 --> 00:58:53,360
Speaker 1: got to be feeling some kind of way. But because

1092
00:58:54,200 --> 00:58:56,840
Speaker 1: you know, it may break him down, I don't want that.

1093
00:58:56,960 --> 00:58:58,920
Speaker 1: I can't be in a relationship with somebody that is

1094
00:58:58,920 --> 00:59:02,760
Speaker 1: an alcoholic when I'd like to drink, So that alone

1095
00:59:02,800 --> 00:59:04,520
Speaker 1: wasn't different break. I was like, look, dude, I wish

1096
00:59:04,520 --> 00:59:06,200
Speaker 1: you well and I hope you meet somebody, but I'm

1097
00:59:06,240 --> 00:59:08,760
Speaker 1: might have my cocktails. I'm a reality starter. I need

1098
00:59:11,920 --> 00:59:15,480
Speaker 1: I can't do it. That's an issue I didn't want

1099
00:59:15,520 --> 00:59:18,960
Speaker 1: to take on. So that conversation couldn't go further than that.

1100
00:59:20,360 --> 00:59:24,520
Speaker 1: So cocaine okay, but alcohol no good, no, no no,

1101
00:59:25,240 --> 00:59:28,240
Speaker 1: I just used alcohol was like real situation that happened

1102
00:59:28,280 --> 00:59:30,720
Speaker 1: to me. The cocaine, you know, the drugs and black

1103
00:59:30,720 --> 00:59:32,880
Speaker 1: I said, some people are willing to put you know

1104
00:59:33,080 --> 00:59:35,920
Speaker 1: do uh. You gotta be true to yourself. I don't

1105
00:59:35,960 --> 00:59:38,000
Speaker 1: want to deal with that. Well for me, I want

1106
00:59:38,000 --> 00:59:40,200
Speaker 1: to know the rules. Give me the rules. Let me

1107
00:59:40,240 --> 00:59:42,720
Speaker 1: know what we're doing in the beginning, because if you

1108
00:59:42,760 --> 00:59:45,120
Speaker 1: can do it, I can do it, bottom line, and

1109
00:59:45,160 --> 00:59:47,400
Speaker 1: I want to see if you say you want to

1110
00:59:47,400 --> 00:59:49,360
Speaker 1: do it, if I want to deal with it, and

1111
00:59:49,480 --> 00:59:53,040
Speaker 1: vice versa. So it's not gonna be a double standard.

1112
00:59:53,080 --> 00:59:55,200
Speaker 1: It's not gonna be one rule for one person and

1113
00:59:55,280 --> 00:59:57,600
Speaker 1: not the other. I want to play by the same

1114
00:59:57,640 --> 01:00:00,400
Speaker 1: set of rules that you're playing by. Equality is big

1115
01:00:00,440 --> 01:00:03,880
Speaker 1: for me across the board in any way. So if

1116
01:00:04,240 --> 01:00:07,080
Speaker 1: you're able to do this on social media, get away

1117
01:00:07,080 --> 01:00:09,800
Speaker 1: with it. I'm able to do this on social media

1118
01:00:09,880 --> 01:00:13,000
Speaker 1: and get away with it, bottom line, across the board.

1119
01:00:13,040 --> 01:00:15,320
Speaker 1: So I don't like that double standards are no no

1120
01:00:15,520 --> 01:00:17,680
Speaker 1: from me. And well, let me just point out that

1121
01:00:17,680 --> 01:00:20,440
Speaker 1: Mike is definitely the petty one in the relationship, so

1122
01:00:21,120 --> 01:00:25,240
Speaker 1: trust and belief he can get petty petty petty. Okay,

1123
01:00:25,520 --> 01:00:28,000
Speaker 1: if if I do something and it rings in the

1124
01:00:28,000 --> 01:00:31,120
Speaker 1: wrong way, oh brother, mad over here, gonna gonna pay

1125
01:00:31,120 --> 01:00:33,760
Speaker 1: me back. Now, Well where the other I'm gonna know

1126
01:00:33,960 --> 01:00:36,280
Speaker 1: that I hadn't hurt this man feelings in some way.

1127
01:00:36,480 --> 01:00:39,720
Speaker 1: He's going to go there for sure. So what is

1128
01:00:39,760 --> 01:00:41,720
Speaker 1: it like being in a relationship where both of you

1129
01:00:41,760 --> 01:00:45,960
Speaker 1: are in the public eye. M h blessing and a curse?

1130
01:00:46,680 --> 01:00:51,000
Speaker 1: You know, it's it's it's it's difficult. You know a

1131
01:00:51,000 --> 01:00:53,840
Speaker 1: lot of great things have come out of it. But

1132
01:00:53,960 --> 01:00:57,920
Speaker 1: at the same time, you know, when you sign on,

1133
01:00:58,160 --> 01:01:00,360
Speaker 1: like for me, I'll just speak for myself. I signed

1134
01:01:00,400 --> 01:01:04,360
Speaker 1: on to be a reality star, so I gave up

1135
01:01:04,400 --> 01:01:07,480
Speaker 1: my privacy. Today, I decided to be a cast member

1136
01:01:07,600 --> 01:01:11,440
Speaker 1: of the Real Houseways of Atlanta. Um. With that said,

1137
01:01:11,680 --> 01:01:14,560
Speaker 1: you know, my life is out there. I put my

1138
01:01:14,600 --> 01:01:17,360
Speaker 1: life out there. I am not surprised to shock when

1139
01:01:17,360 --> 01:01:21,160
Speaker 1: people have opinions about my life, good or bad. It

1140
01:01:21,240 --> 01:01:25,920
Speaker 1: just is what it is. Um. You know, for the

1141
01:01:25,960 --> 01:01:29,400
Speaker 1: most part, I try to conduct myself in a way,

1142
01:01:29,800 --> 01:01:32,440
Speaker 1: carrying myself in a way where I don't get a

1143
01:01:32,560 --> 01:01:36,120
Speaker 1: lot of hate and scrutiny. But at the same time,

1144
01:01:36,320 --> 01:01:40,960
Speaker 1: I'm always expecting it because you know, hat's gonna hate.

1145
01:01:41,320 --> 01:01:45,000
Speaker 1: You know, it just is what it is. So the privacy.

1146
01:01:45,040 --> 01:01:46,720
Speaker 1: But you know, I've been I've been in the game

1147
01:01:46,760 --> 01:01:49,000
Speaker 1: for a long time now, I'm kind of you know,

1148
01:01:49,000 --> 01:01:53,400
Speaker 1: I have a tough skin. I pretty much I don't

1149
01:01:53,480 --> 01:01:55,280
Speaker 1: enjoy it. But I can deal with this point and

1150
01:01:55,280 --> 01:01:59,240
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna lose sleep over. Um. You know, people

1151
01:01:59,280 --> 01:02:01,800
Speaker 1: saying nasty things about me or just not liking me

1152
01:02:01,960 --> 01:02:03,920
Speaker 1: or whatever it is. You know, they, you know, the

1153
01:02:03,960 --> 01:02:07,040
Speaker 1: trolls may say, or the blogs and may say, Like

1154
01:02:07,080 --> 01:02:10,280
Speaker 1: I just can't really consume myself with that because at

1155
01:02:10,320 --> 01:02:13,480
Speaker 1: the end of the day, I don't know these people. Um,

1156
01:02:13,520 --> 01:02:17,080
Speaker 1: you know, if Michelle Obama and Oprah was somewhere wearing

1157
01:02:17,120 --> 01:02:19,400
Speaker 1: me out, then maybe my feelings will be hurt. But

1158
01:02:19,520 --> 01:02:23,520
Speaker 1: you know, usually you know, I don't really you know,

1159
01:02:23,840 --> 01:02:27,440
Speaker 1: if someone I respected, you know, if I disappointed in

1160
01:02:27,520 --> 01:02:31,000
Speaker 1: some way, then that would be hard for me. But

1161
01:02:31,040 --> 01:02:33,560
Speaker 1: as far as just trolls on social media, bloggers that

1162
01:02:33,600 --> 01:02:38,400
Speaker 1: I don't know, you know, their opinion does not matter

1163
01:02:38,440 --> 01:02:40,840
Speaker 1: to me, and they're entitled to have it. But I

1164
01:02:41,160 --> 01:02:43,600
Speaker 1: don't I get I get to still not care, but

1165
01:02:43,680 --> 01:02:45,840
Speaker 1: they're entitled to happen. I think of us something form

1166
01:02:45,840 --> 01:02:49,080
Speaker 1: of relationship aspect. It's tough, and I'm just gonna speak

1167
01:02:49,120 --> 01:02:53,040
Speaker 1: for me because you know, I've been on national news

1168
01:02:53,120 --> 01:02:56,840
Speaker 1: for the last sixteen seventeen years. ESPN had a following there,

1169
01:02:56,880 --> 01:02:59,480
Speaker 1: but this is a different animal for me, and it

1170
01:02:59,640 --> 01:03:03,320
Speaker 1: took me a long time. Is actually adjust to the scrutiny,

1171
01:03:03,400 --> 01:03:07,400
Speaker 1: the criticism that comes with it, because your every move

1172
01:03:07,680 --> 01:03:12,120
Speaker 1: is scrutinized. I could be having lunch with a female

1173
01:03:12,120 --> 01:03:14,640
Speaker 1: companion that's a friend that I could just have face

1174
01:03:14,800 --> 01:03:18,480
Speaker 1: time with with Cynthia, and somebody can take my picture

1175
01:03:18,520 --> 01:03:19,800
Speaker 1: and try and put it in the blog and make

1176
01:03:19,840 --> 01:03:22,480
Speaker 1: it seem like it's worse than what it is. And

1177
01:03:22,600 --> 01:03:25,760
Speaker 1: once it happens, then automatically people just want to believe it.

1178
01:03:26,360 --> 01:03:27,919
Speaker 1: I can take a picture and put it on social

1179
01:03:27,960 --> 01:03:30,960
Speaker 1: media and they're gonna find something wrong with They always

1180
01:03:31,000 --> 01:03:33,160
Speaker 1: have an issue and they always want to say something

1181
01:03:33,160 --> 01:03:35,480
Speaker 1: about our relationship. In the beginning, it was fake. It's

1182
01:03:35,560 --> 01:03:39,320
Speaker 1: for storyline. Uh. It's like, oh, he's a cheater, he's

1183
01:03:39,360 --> 01:03:42,080
Speaker 1: doing all this, he's gonna do number, cheat on or whatnot.

1184
01:03:42,560 --> 01:03:44,720
Speaker 1: Uh oh, and they're the h they're engaged. I was

1185
01:03:44,760 --> 01:03:46,480
Speaker 1: for the storyline, and then all of a sudden, you

1186
01:03:46,520 --> 01:03:48,840
Speaker 1: get married or it's the only gonna last for three months,

1187
01:03:48,840 --> 01:03:50,959
Speaker 1: I'll give it a year. You see all that type

1188
01:03:50,960 --> 01:03:52,840
Speaker 1: of stuff, and you understand where it's coming from. And

1189
01:03:52,840 --> 01:03:55,680
Speaker 1: like Cynthia said, you know, a hater has never done

1190
01:03:55,680 --> 01:03:58,720
Speaker 1: anything that's better than you, So you gotta understand where

1191
01:03:58,720 --> 01:04:01,120
Speaker 1: it's coming from and and the type of person that's

1192
01:04:01,160 --> 01:04:03,960
Speaker 1: coming from. But it's still tough to get used to

1193
01:04:04,560 --> 01:04:07,600
Speaker 1: because it is our relationship. It is our love and

1194
01:04:07,640 --> 01:04:10,520
Speaker 1: we know how genuine it is and we don't want

1195
01:04:10,560 --> 01:04:13,080
Speaker 1: anybody questioning. But the people who are questioning it, we

1196
01:04:13,200 --> 01:04:16,240
Speaker 1: have to just pray for them, and uh, you know,

1197
01:04:16,280 --> 01:04:18,480
Speaker 1: I hope that they can find something as good as

1198
01:04:18,520 --> 01:04:23,320
Speaker 1: we have them. Well, but you know, at the same time,

1199
01:04:23,360 --> 01:04:25,080
Speaker 1: you you pray for him, and you pray that they

1200
01:04:25,160 --> 01:04:30,280
Speaker 1: find somebody as as wonderful, uh and and as loving

1201
01:04:30,360 --> 01:04:33,720
Speaker 1: and have a relationship as beautiful as we have, so

1202
01:04:33,840 --> 01:04:36,240
Speaker 1: they don't really care what they do. Well, then that's

1203
01:04:36,240 --> 01:04:39,040
Speaker 1: your that's your soul, My soul. My spirit basically says,

1204
01:04:39,080 --> 01:04:40,600
Speaker 1: you know, I block them to but I'm still gonna

1205
01:04:40,600 --> 01:04:44,240
Speaker 1: pray for him as I block them. Bottom line. Yeah,

1206
01:04:44,360 --> 01:04:46,480
Speaker 1: you gotta you know, see, I still got the spirit

1207
01:04:46,520 --> 01:04:48,680
Speaker 1: in my baby, see the bottom But you know, but no,

1208
01:04:49,360 --> 01:04:52,080
Speaker 1: bottom line is, man, It's it's tough. It really is

1209
01:04:52,160 --> 01:04:57,640
Speaker 1: tough sometimes being in this celebrity relationship and having you know,

1210
01:04:58,280 --> 01:05:02,360
Speaker 1: people having their opinions and seeing anything that they want

1211
01:05:02,400 --> 01:05:05,280
Speaker 1: to about you at any particular time. You know, sometimes

1212
01:05:05,280 --> 01:05:08,360
Speaker 1: I just wish I could be uh dating just a

1213
01:05:08,400 --> 01:05:10,600
Speaker 1: regular person or just a regular person and not have

1214
01:05:10,680 --> 01:05:13,560
Speaker 1: to worry about, you know, how I'm dressed, or if

1215
01:05:13,600 --> 01:05:16,120
Speaker 1: I put something on social media, how you know, if

1216
01:05:16,120 --> 01:05:18,160
Speaker 1: it's gonna be scrutinized. But I just want to just

1217
01:05:18,200 --> 01:05:20,960
Speaker 1: have fun and be myself sometimes. Yeah, I can understand

1218
01:05:21,000 --> 01:05:24,120
Speaker 1: why some celebrities, you know, when they get to a

1219
01:05:24,200 --> 01:05:27,480
Speaker 1: certain level. And I use the word celebrity loosely when

1220
01:05:27,520 --> 01:05:32,160
Speaker 1: it comes to me, I just consider myself a reality star. Um.

1221
01:05:32,200 --> 01:05:35,080
Speaker 1: But anyway, UM, I can see how some of the

1222
01:05:35,120 --> 01:05:37,120
Speaker 1: bigger celebrities, and I think celebrity, I think, like Eddie

1223
01:05:37,160 --> 01:05:39,160
Speaker 1: Murphy is somebody, you know what I'm saying. I could

1224
01:05:39,200 --> 01:05:42,280
Speaker 1: see why they kind of become introverts and kind of

1225
01:05:42,320 --> 01:05:47,080
Speaker 1: isolate themselves. I can understand that the more fame I get,

1226
01:05:47,120 --> 01:05:52,840
Speaker 1: the more um piece I crave. Um. The more I

1227
01:05:52,880 --> 01:05:55,280
Speaker 1: don't like being in the spotlight, the more I don't

1228
01:05:55,320 --> 01:05:57,000
Speaker 1: like to be that social media around a lot of

1229
01:05:57,040 --> 01:06:01,200
Speaker 1: different people because you know, you don't know what people

1230
01:06:01,240 --> 01:06:05,040
Speaker 1: want from you. And also, I'm very protective of my energy,

1231
01:06:05,320 --> 01:06:07,680
Speaker 1: and I don't like certain energy around me, So I'm

1232
01:06:07,800 --> 01:06:15,200
Speaker 1: very protective of that. Um Yeah, I mean it's stuff.

1233
01:06:15,560 --> 01:06:20,600
Speaker 1: It's tough, but it's it's part. It's you know. I mean,

1234
01:06:20,640 --> 01:06:23,240
Speaker 1: I think about my little bit of little little bit

1235
01:06:23,240 --> 01:06:25,840
Speaker 1: of celebrity I have, and I think about somebody life

1236
01:06:25,840 --> 01:06:29,960
Speaker 1: beyond it. I'm like, with ch'awd, what is she doing?

1237
01:06:30,000 --> 01:06:33,640
Speaker 1: I can't imagine her? Hater is goodness gracious, but you

1238
01:06:33,680 --> 01:06:36,840
Speaker 1: know what, I look at what I see and in

1239
01:06:36,960 --> 01:06:41,040
Speaker 1: her life and her relationship, it seems like, you know,

1240
01:06:41,360 --> 01:06:44,320
Speaker 1: they protect each other. They protect each other. You know,

1241
01:06:44,440 --> 01:06:47,520
Speaker 1: they do what they need to do too. They have

1242
01:06:47,720 --> 01:06:51,560
Speaker 1: figured out a way to have peace that celebrity, and

1243
01:06:51,600 --> 01:06:53,760
Speaker 1: I think that's the trick. There's a reason. You know,

1244
01:06:54,600 --> 01:06:57,360
Speaker 1: I live on a lake. I need peace. I need

1245
01:06:57,400 --> 01:06:59,400
Speaker 1: that balance in my life. I need to be able

1246
01:06:59,400 --> 01:07:04,840
Speaker 1: to come home to peace. I think that's very, very important.

1247
01:07:04,920 --> 01:07:07,560
Speaker 1: So when the noise is going on, in the chaos

1248
01:07:07,640 --> 01:07:11,840
Speaker 1: and the trolling and whatever, it doesn't take me out

1249
01:07:12,240 --> 01:07:16,080
Speaker 1: because I have peace. No matter what you don't like me,

1250
01:07:16,240 --> 01:07:18,920
Speaker 1: I still get to come on the peace. I had

1251
01:07:18,960 --> 01:07:23,440
Speaker 1: a bad episode, I still get to come on to peace. Um.

1252
01:07:23,520 --> 01:07:27,600
Speaker 1: You know, the the things that I care about, I'm

1253
01:07:27,640 --> 01:07:31,600
Speaker 1: clear about the things I care about my family. You know.

1254
01:07:32,480 --> 01:07:34,040
Speaker 1: That's it. That's what I happened at the end of

1255
01:07:34,080 --> 01:07:37,920
Speaker 1: the day, you know, And that's it. In your in

1256
01:07:37,960 --> 01:07:41,880
Speaker 1: your relationships, isn't your Your relationship isn't scripted for the show.

1257
01:07:42,000 --> 01:07:45,160
Speaker 1: It's it's real life. And people may assume that it's scripted,

1258
01:07:45,160 --> 01:07:47,439
Speaker 1: but it's real life. Oh trust me. So I wish

1259
01:07:47,480 --> 01:07:50,760
Speaker 1: it was scripted, it would be easier. I wish we

1260
01:07:50,800 --> 01:07:52,720
Speaker 1: could just come up and make it up. This is

1261
01:07:52,760 --> 01:07:56,919
Speaker 1: our real life, and um, I wouldn't have it any

1262
01:07:56,960 --> 01:08:00,760
Speaker 1: other ways. To be honest, I've been on reality TV

1263
01:08:00,840 --> 01:08:03,240
Speaker 1: for over a decade now, and all I've ever done

1264
01:08:03,400 --> 01:08:09,080
Speaker 1: was be me and be transparent. Show my ups, downs, peaks, valleys, highs, lows,

1265
01:08:09,640 --> 01:08:13,560
Speaker 1: strong points, weak points, be vulnerable, be a mess, be

1266
01:08:13,640 --> 01:08:17,920
Speaker 1: a boss, be strong. I've shown it all and with that,

1267
01:08:20,360 --> 01:08:24,400
Speaker 1: I'm inspiring somebody. I'm motivating somebody to do something. And

1268
01:08:24,520 --> 01:08:27,880
Speaker 1: I always just choose to focus on the positive. You know,

1269
01:08:28,080 --> 01:08:30,840
Speaker 1: my real life is my real life, and I show

1270
01:08:31,320 --> 01:08:33,599
Speaker 1: if I'm gonna be a reality show, a reality start,

1271
01:08:33,600 --> 01:08:36,240
Speaker 1: I have to show my real life. Social Media is

1272
01:08:36,280 --> 01:08:40,360
Speaker 1: a choice. I have to participated that phone too, know

1273
01:08:40,360 --> 01:08:43,640
Speaker 1: what I mean. My job, my life, the job that

1274
01:08:43,680 --> 01:08:47,719
Speaker 1: I've chose to have, you know, that's all a choice.

1275
01:08:47,840 --> 01:08:53,400
Speaker 1: Everything else, you know, you know, well, those are the

1276
01:08:53,439 --> 01:08:56,920
Speaker 1: things that I want to do. Um participating on social media,

1277
01:08:56,960 --> 01:09:02,400
Speaker 1: that's that's my choice, you know. Engaging you know, that's

1278
01:09:02,439 --> 01:09:05,559
Speaker 1: my choice. Well, as we as we bring this to

1279
01:09:06,280 --> 01:09:09,559
Speaker 1: a close, I wanted to ask you, Mike a question

1280
01:09:10,120 --> 01:09:12,840
Speaker 1: because when you're on TV. You're such a positive and

1281
01:09:12,920 --> 01:09:16,680
Speaker 1: upbeat person in life, and for my experience with your

1282
01:09:16,760 --> 01:09:19,479
Speaker 1: very positive and upbeat but as we know from your

1283
01:09:19,479 --> 01:09:22,519
Speaker 1: amazing memoir Open Mic, which came out last year, you've

1284
01:09:22,520 --> 01:09:26,280
Speaker 1: battled your share of enter demons. Why did you write

1285
01:09:26,280 --> 01:09:27,960
Speaker 1: the book and if you would tell us some of

1286
01:09:27,960 --> 01:09:32,280
Speaker 1: your personal struggles from from childhood. Well, I wrote the

1287
01:09:32,280 --> 01:09:34,439
Speaker 1: book because I needed to write the book. It was time.

1288
01:09:34,960 --> 01:09:40,000
Speaker 1: I I started writing it because a friend of mine

1289
01:09:40,000 --> 01:09:42,120
Speaker 1: told me I needed to write a memoir because I

1290
01:09:42,200 --> 01:09:45,640
Speaker 1: was telling her about my about my past and some

1291
01:09:45,680 --> 01:09:48,200
Speaker 1: of the things that dealt with over my career and

1292
01:09:48,280 --> 01:09:50,920
Speaker 1: my personal life. But I didn't feel like it was

1293
01:09:51,040 --> 01:09:52,720
Speaker 1: time to write because I didn't think anybody was going

1294
01:09:52,760 --> 01:09:54,479
Speaker 1: to read it. I'm like, who am I'm not a celebrity,

1295
01:09:54,520 --> 01:09:57,519
Speaker 1: I'm not anybody big, nobody cares about my life. But

1296
01:09:57,600 --> 01:09:59,880
Speaker 1: then I picked it back up and started writing again

1297
01:10:00,040 --> 01:10:01,960
Speaker 1: about three or four years later, because I felt like

1298
01:10:01,960 --> 01:10:04,080
Speaker 1: I needed to write it because if I didn't write

1299
01:10:04,080 --> 01:10:06,760
Speaker 1: it at that particular time, which was about three or

1300
01:10:06,800 --> 01:10:09,559
Speaker 1: four years ago, I wouldn't be here right now. And

1301
01:10:09,600 --> 01:10:12,479
Speaker 1: I really truly believe that Giano, I really feel like

1302
01:10:13,520 --> 01:10:15,280
Speaker 1: I would have had a stroke, I would have died

1303
01:10:15,320 --> 01:10:17,880
Speaker 1: of a heart attack because I had so much internal

1304
01:10:18,200 --> 01:10:21,680
Speaker 1: pain and trauma and sadness that was embedded in me

1305
01:10:21,800 --> 01:10:24,760
Speaker 1: that I had just suppressed for so many years that

1306
01:10:24,880 --> 01:10:28,000
Speaker 1: needed to be released. And as I told you earlier

1307
01:10:28,000 --> 01:10:31,840
Speaker 1: in the podcast, open Mic was my therapy that I

1308
01:10:31,880 --> 01:10:35,160
Speaker 1: didn't even realize I needed to have. So once I

1309
01:10:35,160 --> 01:10:39,840
Speaker 1: started writing a book, uh, everything started flowing out and

1310
01:10:39,880 --> 01:10:43,160
Speaker 1: I started feeling a sense of relief, and I had

1311
01:10:43,200 --> 01:10:46,320
Speaker 1: to even write more and more. And once I started writing,

1312
01:10:46,680 --> 01:10:50,360
Speaker 1: I couldn't stop writing. And uh So some of those pains,

1313
01:10:50,360 --> 01:10:52,439
Speaker 1: some of those traumas, you know, we deal with as

1314
01:10:52,720 --> 01:10:55,400
Speaker 1: uh we talked about it, as as being growing up

1315
01:10:55,400 --> 01:10:58,960
Speaker 1: in certain environments as a black man, you know, seeing

1316
01:10:59,080 --> 01:11:01,840
Speaker 1: domestic violence. You know, at an early age. One of

1317
01:11:01,840 --> 01:11:04,240
Speaker 1: the first memories I had in my life was seeing

1318
01:11:04,280 --> 01:11:07,479
Speaker 1: my mom, you know, brutally beaten by my dad. Uh

1319
01:11:08,160 --> 01:11:11,519
Speaker 1: finding out my dad, my stepfather who who raised me,

1320
01:11:11,520 --> 01:11:14,680
Speaker 1: because my biological father wasn't in my life. My stepfather

1321
01:11:14,840 --> 01:11:17,599
Speaker 1: was a hit man who spent the last nine years

1322
01:11:17,640 --> 01:11:20,200
Speaker 1: of his life in prison for murder for higher you know,

1323
01:11:20,320 --> 01:11:21,840
Speaker 1: a lot of the things that I saw and didn't

1324
01:11:21,840 --> 01:11:23,200
Speaker 1: see a lot of love and didn't see a lot

1325
01:11:23,240 --> 01:11:26,760
Speaker 1: of positive male role models in my life growing up.

1326
01:11:26,800 --> 01:11:28,880
Speaker 1: So I didn't know how to love. I didn't know

1327
01:11:28,880 --> 01:11:30,880
Speaker 1: how to commit to anybody. The first person I ever

1328
01:11:30,960 --> 01:11:34,080
Speaker 1: told I love this woman looked at me like I

1329
01:11:34,120 --> 01:11:36,519
Speaker 1: was crazy, and it affected me for so many years.

1330
01:11:36,520 --> 01:11:39,479
Speaker 1: So it was so many different things that happened to

1331
01:11:39,479 --> 01:11:42,720
Speaker 1: me at an early age that we as black men

1332
01:11:42,760 --> 01:11:44,880
Speaker 1: a lot of times just deal with because we feel

1333
01:11:44,920 --> 01:11:47,680
Speaker 1: like that's life and we're never gonna get the the

1334
01:11:47,720 --> 01:11:51,759
Speaker 1: help that we need. And so the reason you asked

1335
01:11:51,760 --> 01:11:54,280
Speaker 1: me why I wrote the book, it is because at

1336
01:11:54,320 --> 01:11:56,760
Speaker 1: the time, I needed to write that book, uh, and

1337
01:11:56,800 --> 01:11:59,080
Speaker 1: that became my first sense of therapy, and once I

1338
01:11:59,120 --> 01:12:01,800
Speaker 1: got that out, I was able to follow up with

1339
01:12:02,160 --> 01:12:04,760
Speaker 1: a counselor and I've been doing that ever since. Bro

1340
01:12:06,360 --> 01:12:09,360
Speaker 1: and Gianno just really quickly. If Mike had written that book,

1341
01:12:10,000 --> 01:12:14,200
Speaker 1: I don't think we would be together. M Honestly, I

1342
01:12:14,280 --> 01:12:21,800
Speaker 1: really don't. I don't think he would um. I don't

1343
01:12:21,840 --> 01:12:24,840
Speaker 1: think he would have been able to be with someone

1344
01:12:24,920 --> 01:12:28,000
Speaker 1: like me, and I don't think I would have wanted

1345
01:12:28,000 --> 01:12:30,840
Speaker 1: to be with him. You know, I wouldn't have been ready.

1346
01:12:30,920 --> 01:12:33,400
Speaker 1: I wasn't because you know, there was a lot of things,

1347
01:12:33,400 --> 01:12:34,880
Speaker 1: and it cost me a lot of relationships. And I

1348
01:12:34,880 --> 01:12:37,760
Speaker 1: wrote that in open mic. It cost me because I

1349
01:12:37,800 --> 01:12:41,240
Speaker 1: wasn't whole, because I didn't realize that I was hurting

1350
01:12:41,280 --> 01:12:45,160
Speaker 1: myself one way, but I was hurting the people around

1351
01:12:45,160 --> 01:12:47,160
Speaker 1: me because of the things that was affected me in

1352
01:12:47,320 --> 01:12:49,960
Speaker 1: my life that I didn't even really know about. And

1353
01:12:50,040 --> 01:12:51,720
Speaker 1: I was reaching out, like I was telling, you know,

1354
01:12:51,800 --> 01:12:53,680
Speaker 1: since you I didn't trust a lot of people in

1355
01:12:53,680 --> 01:12:56,599
Speaker 1: the beginning because I didn't trust myself because I wasn't

1356
01:12:56,600 --> 01:12:58,519
Speaker 1: in love with myself. I couldn't fall in love with

1357
01:12:58,560 --> 01:13:01,559
Speaker 1: somebody else, and that you to my ex wise, you know,

1358
01:13:01,640 --> 01:13:03,960
Speaker 1: I could love somebody, but I could not fall in

1359
01:13:04,040 --> 01:13:06,680
Speaker 1: love with somebody, and that was a big difference. And

1360
01:13:06,720 --> 01:13:09,679
Speaker 1: I was hurting myself and I was hurting other people

1361
01:13:09,680 --> 01:13:12,320
Speaker 1: around me. So yeah, until I was able to become whole,

1362
01:13:12,360 --> 01:13:16,240
Speaker 1: I wasn't able to accept somebody, uh like Cynthia, because

1363
01:13:16,479 --> 01:13:19,280
Speaker 1: you know, I was playing games. I was being a

1364
01:13:19,360 --> 01:13:22,800
Speaker 1: boy and acting like a man and thinking I was

1365
01:13:22,840 --> 01:13:25,639
Speaker 1: a man, you know. So once I wrote the book,

1366
01:13:25,680 --> 01:13:28,880
Speaker 1: I was able to start stepping into my manhood. And

1367
01:13:28,920 --> 01:13:31,800
Speaker 1: I'm still doing that to this very day. Wow. Yeah.

1368
01:13:31,800 --> 01:13:33,760
Speaker 1: And I have a copy of your book. It's a

1369
01:13:33,800 --> 01:13:36,000
Speaker 1: great memoir and I encourage people to buy it. And

1370
01:13:36,040 --> 01:13:39,040
Speaker 1: I also want to thank you for supporting my book.

1371
01:13:39,080 --> 01:13:41,920
Speaker 1: Taking for granted you and Cynthia went out and bought

1372
01:13:41,960 --> 01:13:43,360
Speaker 1: it on your own. I didn't have to give a

1373
01:13:43,400 --> 01:13:44,920
Speaker 1: free copy and you didn't have to do that for

1374
01:13:45,000 --> 01:13:47,200
Speaker 1: me because I supporting each other. So I appreciate that.

1375
01:13:47,320 --> 01:13:49,479
Speaker 1: And I want to thank you all for spending you'all

1376
01:13:49,520 --> 01:13:52,880
Speaker 1: Friday night with me. It's currently a p m on

1377
01:13:52,920 --> 01:13:55,120
Speaker 1: the Friday, and I know y'all probably got the drink

1378
01:13:55,160 --> 01:13:58,040
Speaker 1: stirring in the background and ready for that for the

1379
01:13:58,160 --> 01:14:00,800
Speaker 1: for the Bailey Bailey drink. What's what's the name of

1380
01:14:00,840 --> 01:14:05,839
Speaker 1: your drink, Cynthia Um Peach Bellini, Sigrums Escapes, Peach Bellini,

1381
01:14:06,160 --> 01:14:08,920
Speaker 1: Peach Bellini, So I know those that's that's getting ready

1382
01:14:09,400 --> 01:14:12,439
Speaker 1: for your Friday night. Now before we go, what's next

1383
01:14:12,479 --> 01:14:14,280
Speaker 1: for you guys? Do you have any big projects coming

1384
01:14:14,360 --> 01:14:16,720
Speaker 1: up for the folks at home that they should know about?

1385
01:14:16,760 --> 01:14:18,479
Speaker 1: What can people find you on social media? And that's

1386
01:14:18,520 --> 01:14:21,240
Speaker 1: where elsewhere? And what's next for the Real Housewives of

1387
01:14:21,280 --> 01:14:24,920
Speaker 1: Atlanta and and certainly. UM, plug your your morning show,

1388
01:14:25,200 --> 01:14:29,400
Speaker 1: Mike on Black News Channel. Okay, what's next in terms

1389
01:14:29,439 --> 01:14:32,439
Speaker 1: of Real Housewives of Atlanta. Um, we just finished film

1390
01:14:32,439 --> 01:14:35,880
Speaker 1: of the reunion, three part reunion that's coming up. That's

1391
01:14:35,880 --> 01:14:39,519
Speaker 1: always fun to watch. Not as much fun to do,

1392
01:14:39,600 --> 01:14:43,000
Speaker 1: but definitely fun for y'all to watch. It's a long day,

1393
01:14:43,080 --> 01:14:45,200
Speaker 1: a lot going on, but I actually enjoyed the region

1394
01:14:45,240 --> 01:14:48,040
Speaker 1: because it's our time to have the face to face

1395
01:14:48,080 --> 01:14:50,960
Speaker 1: and just get closure with whatever issues. Um, Mike and

1396
01:14:51,040 --> 01:14:54,880
Speaker 1: I have a couple of other TV projects that we're

1397
01:14:54,880 --> 01:14:59,040
Speaker 1: working on together. We can't really say right now, but

1398
01:14:59,120 --> 01:15:02,160
Speaker 1: as soon as we are able to officially announce them,

1399
01:15:02,200 --> 01:15:04,040
Speaker 1: we will come back on your show and we'll let

1400
01:15:04,080 --> 01:15:06,920
Speaker 1: you thank you. But yeah, we got a lot of

1401
01:15:06,960 --> 01:15:10,040
Speaker 1: things going on. You guys know, if you're in Atlanta, Uh,

1402
01:15:10,479 --> 01:15:12,600
Speaker 1: come have a glass of wine. But that's at the

1403
01:15:12,640 --> 01:15:17,599
Speaker 1: Bailey Wine Seller. Um. Absolutely, But we're good right now.

1404
01:15:17,680 --> 01:15:20,360
Speaker 1: You know, we're like six months into our marriage. Our

1405
01:15:20,400 --> 01:15:24,680
Speaker 1: biggest project right now, our biggest job right now is

1406
01:15:25,160 --> 01:15:28,200
Speaker 1: now that we have tied the knot. You know, getting

1407
01:15:28,200 --> 01:15:30,840
Speaker 1: married is one thing. Stand married, you know, just working

1408
01:15:30,840 --> 01:15:34,679
Speaker 1: on our relationship, just keeping it going, you know, getting

1409
01:15:34,760 --> 01:15:37,320
Speaker 1: here is one part like just stand, like just being

1410
01:15:37,439 --> 01:15:40,240
Speaker 1: keep standing in this place of love and happiness and peace.

1411
01:15:40,360 --> 01:15:42,559
Speaker 1: You know that takes work. You just don't get married

1412
01:15:42,600 --> 01:15:45,080
Speaker 1: and then it just magically everything is perfect. You gotta

1413
01:15:45,120 --> 01:15:47,400
Speaker 1: work on it. You gotta keep you know, you gotta

1414
01:15:47,479 --> 01:15:50,000
Speaker 1: keep your marriage going and keep it happy and healthy.

1415
01:15:50,479 --> 01:15:52,160
Speaker 1: Which is why my man is about taking me to

1416
01:15:52,200 --> 01:15:56,560
Speaker 1: dinner on a date. Yeah. But now I got you know,

1417
01:15:56,600 --> 01:15:58,719
Speaker 1: I got the Black News Channel. Man, it's just started

1418
01:15:58,760 --> 01:16:01,519
Speaker 1: and we just launched in marsh re launched. You'll start

1419
01:16:01,560 --> 01:16:05,200
Speaker 1: your day with sharing the mike, so getting up super

1420
01:16:05,200 --> 01:16:07,080
Speaker 1: early in the morning, having a good time. It's part

1421
01:16:07,080 --> 01:16:09,040
Speaker 1: of talk show, a part news shannel. We keep it

1422
01:16:09,080 --> 01:16:13,519
Speaker 1: real great platform. But also you know, at Cynthia said,

1423
01:16:13,520 --> 01:16:15,240
Speaker 1: we got a couple of projects that we're working out

1424
01:16:15,240 --> 01:16:18,720
Speaker 1: that's coming out pretty soon. Open Mic still in bookstores,

1425
01:16:19,280 --> 01:16:26,720
Speaker 1: Bonds and Nobles, Target, Walmart, and um one more place Amazon, Amazon,

1426
01:16:26,760 --> 01:16:29,240
Speaker 1: there you go, Amazon dot Com. Semo. Man is always

1427
01:16:29,240 --> 01:16:31,760
Speaker 1: looking out for me there and uh, I got my

1428
01:16:31,800 --> 01:16:34,320
Speaker 1: open mic sessions that I'm doing and just you know,

1429
01:16:34,400 --> 01:16:36,920
Speaker 1: enjoying life, man, that's what it's all about. And hanging

1430
01:16:36,920 --> 01:16:41,439
Speaker 1: out my man. Gia L. A but he's hanging in

1431
01:16:41,479 --> 01:16:45,160
Speaker 1: Miami so much. Now you come see me anymore? Brother, Yeah,

1432
01:16:45,200 --> 01:16:47,479
Speaker 1: now I'm gonna be with you. And I saw that

1433
01:16:47,600 --> 01:16:49,880
Speaker 1: I rather I didn't see a lot of people told

1434
01:16:49,880 --> 01:16:51,880
Speaker 1: me that I made the Real Housewives of Atlanta when

1435
01:16:51,920 --> 01:16:55,920
Speaker 1: I was at your wedding. So yeah, you was dancing, bro, Yeah,

1436
01:16:56,000 --> 01:16:58,519
Speaker 1: that's one of my biggest skill sets. I hit the

1437
01:16:58,600 --> 01:17:01,920
Speaker 1: dance floor. You have a the time, man, you absolutely

1438
01:17:02,160 --> 01:17:05,439
Speaker 1: you already know indeed, Well, thank you all for joining

1439
01:17:05,479 --> 01:17:08,479
Speaker 1: out lout with Gianno calledwell and it's been an honor

1440
01:17:08,520 --> 01:17:12,640
Speaker 1: to hear your story again and expose my audience to

1441
01:17:13,600 --> 01:17:16,240
Speaker 1: uh your lives and it's it's really an honor to

1442
01:17:16,280 --> 01:17:18,600
Speaker 1: see where you all are and where you're going. And

1443
01:17:18,600 --> 01:17:21,400
Speaker 1: I'm so thankful to be a friend to you both

1444
01:17:21,560 --> 01:17:24,080
Speaker 1: and and just see it up close and personal. And

1445
01:17:24,400 --> 01:17:27,879
Speaker 1: thank you for sharing that light with with with my listeners. Giano,

1446
01:17:27,960 --> 01:17:29,639
Speaker 1: Thank you man for having us on May We really

1447
01:17:29,680 --> 01:17:32,639
Speaker 1: appreciate your brother absolutely, Thank you, my guy. I want

1448
01:17:32,640 --> 01:17:35,720
Speaker 1: to thank Mike Hill and Cynthia Baby Hill again for

1449
01:17:35,760 --> 01:17:38,280
Speaker 1: the great interview. If you're enjoying the show, please leave

1450
01:17:38,360 --> 01:17:40,000
Speaker 1: us a review and rate us with five stars on

1451
01:17:40,040 --> 01:17:43,040
Speaker 1: Apple podcasts. If you have any questions for me, please

1452
01:17:43,040 --> 01:17:45,080
Speaker 1: email me at out Loud at get your Street sixty

1453
01:17:45,160 --> 01:17:46,720
Speaker 1: dot com and I'll try to answer them in our

1454
01:17:46,720 --> 01:17:50,719
Speaker 1: future episode. You can also find me on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook,

1455
01:17:50,720 --> 01:17:53,400
Speaker 1: and parlor at Gianno Caldwell. And if you're interested in

1456
01:17:53,479 --> 01:17:55,599
Speaker 1: learning more about my story, please pick up a copy

1457
01:17:55,600 --> 01:17:58,280
Speaker 1: of my best selling book title Taken for Granted, How

1458
01:17:58,280 --> 01:18:01,639
Speaker 1: Conservatism Can Win Back the Americans at Liberalism Failed. Special

1459
01:18:01,680 --> 01:18:05,200
Speaker 1: thanks for our producer John Cassio, researcher Aaron Klingman, and

1460
01:18:05,320 --> 01:18:09,000
Speaker 1: executive producers Debbie Meyers and speaker New Gingridge, all part

1461
01:18:09,000 --> 01:18:10,479
Speaker 1: of the Ginglidge three sixty network