Speaker 1: Are you leaving? I you wanna way back home?
Speaker 2: Either way, we want to be.
Speaker 3: There, doesn't matter how much baggage you claim.
Speaker 2: Give us time and a Turmano and gabe A.
Speaker 3: We want to send you off InStyle.
Speaker 1: We wanna welcome you back home.
Speaker 3: Tell us all about it.
Speaker 1: We scared her?
Speaker 4: Was it fine? Now? Porn? Do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Do you need ride?
Speaker 2: With Karen and Chris welcome? Do you need a ride?
Speaker 2: This is Chris Phairbanks is my.
Speaker 1: Name, and this is Karen Kilgareth is my name.
Speaker 2: I don't think I've ever messed up my own name,
Speaker 2: or have.
Speaker 3: I I've never heard you mess up your own name.
Speaker 3: But I feel like you're holding down a lot of
Speaker 3: things in this podcast as the sound man.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but driving. We all know that driving is more
Speaker 2: difficult than just looking at a thing.
Speaker 1: Oh, driving so easy you barely have to pay attention?
Speaker 2: Did I personally? I'm just that's my new gag. I
Speaker 2: forgot to say occasionally, I said, have I done that?
Speaker 2: Messed up my own name? On purpose?
Speaker 4: Joke?
Speaker 2: Yet that's what I meant to say.
Speaker 3: Oh, so you messed up the question of asking about
Speaker 3: messing up your name.
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, it's uh, there's the first time for everything,
Speaker 2: and that one was unsuccessful. My name is Chris Fairbanks.
Speaker 2: This is Do you Need to Ride.
Speaker 1: My name is Karen Kilgara, and it's still Do.
Speaker 2: You Need to Ride. Yes, we have not changed the
Speaker 2: podcast name since the failure of my initial name joke.
Speaker 3: Although if you do have a suggestion of a better
Speaker 3: name for this podcast, you know, we're open minded individuals.
Speaker 1: You'd love to hear.
Speaker 2: Oh what, you're so smart. There was two women on
Speaker 2: the wrong side of the street riding bikes.
Speaker 1: Riding bikes in the in.
Speaker 2: The lanes, so nonchalantly they were, and they didn't even
Speaker 2: recognize the fact that they almost got hit by cars.
Speaker 3: I thought I drove onto a bike lane just there,
Speaker 3: but no, it was just two ladies.
Speaker 2: And they they will leave. They will leave that situation.
Speaker 2: That's what's frustrating. They will leave that situation having learned
Speaker 2: nothing because they stared at the cars like they were
Speaker 2: in the wrong.
Speaker 3: Yeah, because they're probably from elsewhere else. So they're like,
Speaker 3: we're going to ride our bikes to the beach on
Speaker 3: what is a small highway.
Speaker 2: I that was very frustrating.
Speaker 1: That was an almost it was almost murdered.
Speaker 2: Happened right at the corner of something in Lincoln. We
Speaker 2: are head to now do south on Lincoln towards lax
Speaker 2: where we are going to pick up Michelle Balloon.
Speaker 3: Michelle Balloon one of my favorite people, favorite comedians, but
Speaker 3: favorite people.
Speaker 2: She's one of my early favorite people. Before you ever
Speaker 2: even knew.
Speaker 1: Her, Karen, I got into her in the late eighties.
Speaker 2: She was just a futuristic apparition to you, and I
Speaker 2: was already knowing her in the flesh.
Speaker 1: Now where did you meet her?
Speaker 2: Austin, Texas?
Speaker 1: Is that where she started stand up?
Speaker 2: Yes? I remember one time I was hosting the open mic,
Speaker 2: something I do not enjoy doing. Running the list weirdos
Speaker 2: show up. This one guy used to show up. You'd
Speaker 2: do a Christopher walk and then turn around and pee
Speaker 2: in a bucket.
Speaker 1: Oh on streets.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that was his act.
Speaker 1: That is funny.
Speaker 2: Some mentally ill street guys would come in and they'd
Speaker 2: do their hold up qu cards and there was a
Speaker 2: lot of strange people that showed up to the open mic.
Speaker 2: My I just whistled like a Southerner once I'm talking
Speaker 2: about Texas. I can't do it.
Speaker 1: You're like the little pigeon, that little pigeon that blows.
Speaker 2: Up his own feather, the red Neck pigeon.
Speaker 3: You know the cartoon where there's a little or as
Speaker 3: a quail and every time he says an ass, he
Speaker 3: blows his little feather up the Oh.
Speaker 2: Wow, No, I would enjoy him even now. And it's
Speaker 2: I was.
Speaker 3: Just gonna say, what would an open might be without
Speaker 3: the mentally ill contingent that always comes in and makes
Speaker 3: it so much more interesting?
Speaker 2: I guess yeah, I really don't enjoy having to control
Speaker 2: that environment. Anyway. Michelle came one night and she was
Speaker 2: like she had already been a stand up for years,
Speaker 2: and it was like her first time. And I remember saying,
Speaker 2: you are good. You should keep coming back, and she did.
Speaker 2: And so what I'm saying is it's yet another career
Speaker 2: like Brendan Walsh's that I started. I should be getting
Speaker 2: cuts of these incomes.
Speaker 1: You're like the Ed McMahon of Austin. Were you just hey, heyo?
Speaker 2: What did he do? Heyo?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 1: He just yelled hey all the time.
Speaker 3: Hey, Hi, hi, karate boo yah.
Speaker 2: Carson Daddio Carson giant envelope doorstep. Uh, he just said things.
Speaker 1: Have you ever seen Ed McMahon. I guess not.
Speaker 2: I guess I'm creating another person in my head. But yes,
Speaker 2: Michelle and I started stand.
Speaker 1: Up together, and she's great.
Speaker 3: I always heard her name, which is one of those
Speaker 3: great comedy names that you can't ask for a better one.
Speaker 2: Yeah, she didn't. She didn't make it up. Her real
Speaker 2: name is Balloon with an eye.
Speaker 3: It is not a stage name, Balloon with an eye,
Speaker 3: right like Belond Balloon Balloon.
Speaker 2: I do not know. I think it's iland.
Speaker 3: But she she looks so much like my She looks
Speaker 3: like she could be a sister with me and my sister.
Speaker 1: She looks like a midstep between me and my sister.
Speaker 2: Her do eyes and everything. Yeah, it's weird that I
Speaker 2: never even really noticed that.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and she but she has she has a lot
Speaker 3: of my sister's features. So like the last time we
Speaker 3: all did Little Joy together, she was on stage and
Speaker 3: I had this huge wave of like I loved her,
Speaker 3: Like I just had this huge wave of like familiarity
Speaker 3: and like I told you that where I was just
Speaker 3: kind of like so it may it was because I
Speaker 3: was kind of homesick. I think I hadn't seen my
Speaker 3: family in a really long time. But it was also
Speaker 3: just that thing of like watching somebody like I don't know.
Speaker 3: It's when you know people.
Speaker 2: Are like to and so you were watching her and
Speaker 2: not unlike in cartoons where her body turned to a
Speaker 2: chicken's body. Her body turned into your old house with
Speaker 2: your family inside.
Speaker 3: That's right, but it's still I was. It just made
Speaker 3: me hungry for chicken. Oh yeah, that's what made me.
Speaker 2: They made good chicken at your old home.
Speaker 1: Oh my god.
Speaker 3: My hometown is the egg basket of the world, or
Speaker 3: was at one point.
Speaker 2: Well we all know that.
Speaker 1: Do you egg baskets?
Speaker 3: We should drive up for the Butter and Eggs Day parade,
Speaker 3: which is sometime at the end of the mooing Oh is.
Speaker 2: That just after the water mill and seed spitting contest.
Speaker 1: You know what, if you're gonna be rude about it,
Speaker 1: you're not invited.
Speaker 2: I would like to go. I apologize.
Speaker 1: Okay, I'm glad we solved that.
Speaker 2: Well, are you you should let Michelle mill this? Did you?
Speaker 1: No?
Speaker 2: No, don't tell her, Okay.
Speaker 1: Okay, she'll just get all stuck up people.
Speaker 2: You know what, and she will. That's one thing I
Speaker 2: haven't mentioned about Michelle yet. She is a stuck up.
Speaker 3: She's so stuck that word I think I did tell
Speaker 3: her that night. And one's one of those things where.
Speaker 2: Yes, how many how many bodies?
Speaker 1: Let the bodies hit the floor? For Christ's sake?
Speaker 2: Is that disturbed? I got? I should have been in
Speaker 2: a metal band.
Speaker 3: No, that was amazing. Careful you watch your instrument. Here's
Speaker 3: here comes another fire truck. Well, oh no, this is
Speaker 3: it's a five alarm fire.
Speaker 1: Oh god, I mean, they just keep coming that.
Speaker 2: At least we know there's gonna be delicious chili that
Speaker 2: comes out of it.
Speaker 3: That was sincere laugh that I got insecure about halfway through.
Speaker 1: Did you hear that? I meant it?
Speaker 2: And then I all that happens all the time.
Speaker 1: It's embarrassing.
Speaker 2: Well, I make people laugh with things that are really
Speaker 2: dumb because of salesmanship.
Speaker 1: That's exactly right.
Speaker 3: Well, Also, I know how much I'm gonna laugh with you,
Speaker 3: so I'm just constantly. I just I'm so I feel
Speaker 3: so much freer to laugh when you're talking.
Speaker 2: Don't just be open, just open.
Speaker 1: I can trust you. At the end, you're gonna deliver
Speaker 1: something that's laugh worthy.
Speaker 2: Every other one. It's gonna just be good delivery, bad idea.
Speaker 2: But I don't know. Five alarm chili is a thing
Speaker 2: I've heard of.
Speaker 1: It's a real thing.
Speaker 2: I've perhaps heard of that type of chili more than
Speaker 2: that type of for me. But your your dad was
Speaker 2: a fireman, and you grew up around that.
Speaker 1: I grew up around child you.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, my house, we knew, people knew our house
Speaker 2: as the city's chili basket.
Speaker 3: Oh do you have the beans and hot Sauce parade
Speaker 3: every year?
Speaker 2: Yes?
Speaker 1: Is this playing going to land on us?
Speaker 2: It's going to rest gently on the top of your
Speaker 2: fit and we were going to take them the rest
Speaker 2: of away like a space shuttle.
Speaker 1: Do you think audio picked up that?
Speaker 2: Oh? I so, I hope pretty d I definitely heard it,
Speaker 2: and I'd like to think it was through these earphones.
Speaker 3: I was gonna say, though, I did tell I think
Speaker 3: that night at Little Joy, I tried to express that
Speaker 3: feeling I had about Michelle to Michelle, and she was
Speaker 3: in such that Michelle balloon Way was like ohh And
Speaker 3: I was like just looking at you up there and
Speaker 3: I just love you.
Speaker 4: You're the best.
Speaker 2: She No, she's she I remember that when because we
Speaker 2: had been friends for a few years, and uh, you know,
Speaker 2: like the first time I'm a hugger person and I
Speaker 2: remember hugging her and I was like, oh, man, maybe
Speaker 2: where she grew up they don't like hug all willy nilly. Yeah,
Speaker 2: so that's what it is.
Speaker 1: But now, what what was the answer did you ask?
Speaker 4: No?
Speaker 2: I know, I never I you know, I think that
Speaker 2: she's just tougher than me. But once you break her down,
Speaker 2: she's a she's a bucket of sacrain.
Speaker 1: She is from Wisconsinny bucket.
Speaker 2: Yeah. She went to school in Madison, Yes, and I
Speaker 2: think grew up in Madden. I'm not sure I should know.
Speaker 3: Those Wisconsin ights there they pretend to be cold, but
Speaker 3: deep down inside they're warm.
Speaker 1: I guess, so I don't know that one.
Speaker 2: Do you mean the weather?
Speaker 1: I'm not sure. I was just talking. I do that
Speaker 1: a lot. You let the words you follow lord, most
Speaker 1: people do.
Speaker 2: And I it's when someone starts a story and they're
Speaker 2: telling it all interestingly, and they're like, oh, and then
Speaker 2: that we're going to want to go behind this black
Speaker 2: hit man, and they're telling this story with all this emphasis,
Speaker 2: and then you realize halfway through, Oh this is going nowhere,
Speaker 2: and they don't know where it's going either. They're just
Speaker 2: delivering a story with intent. Yeah, but they at the end,
Speaker 2: you know, they're gonna have to make something up. And
Speaker 2: then I killed them, right, and then I, yeah, that's
Speaker 2: what I did. I killed him.
Speaker 1: You got to throw a little something on there, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: a little dash of interest. Me and my sister do
Speaker 1: a thing.
Speaker 3: I think I blame my sister for having this habit
Speaker 3: is that you tell a story and you you expect
Speaker 3: to get laughs in certain spots, and if you don't
Speaker 3: get the reaction that you ask for, you just retell
Speaker 3: the end of the story. So like you very quickly
Speaker 3: recap to try to get the laughter that you feel
Speaker 3: you deserved in the first place.
Speaker 2: We do do that. That's a tactic.
Speaker 1: I do it often.
Speaker 3: And kind of like then they both my sister and
Speaker 3: I both will lean in and kind of stare at you.
Speaker 2: So I went miles door. I saw the guy. He
Speaker 2: went out to my car and he spray painted it.
Speaker 2: And I said, I'll buy that for a dollar.
Speaker 1: I'll buy that for a dollar.
Speaker 3: Oh, up to my car and I say, I'll buy
Speaker 3: that for It was insane.
Speaker 2: And then I actually gave him a dollar, you like,
Speaker 2: add something to.
Speaker 3: It to see if that's what they're looking for. Do
Speaker 3: not do anything for you if I gave him money.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you wanted it to get played out. Okay, well
Speaker 2: it's we are going to be This is gonna work
Speaker 2: out perfect as usual. And this has been a trend lately.
Speaker 2: Flights have come into Lax a half hour early. I
Speaker 2: don't know why they're doing this, all the different airlines.
Speaker 2: It's a conspiracy, yep, they say, oh, she will arrive
Speaker 2: at one now, twelve twenty eight, twelve eight. Anyway, I
Speaker 2: think that technically they're they're there. The time that they're
Speaker 2: posting is when you will be walking out of the
Speaker 2: gate into the gate.
Speaker 1: And what airline is it?
Speaker 2: I will let you know that, uh, and I'm looking
Speaker 2: it up now. She's outside baggage claim at terminal six,
Speaker 2: so continue in the direction you are, okay, right past
Speaker 2: the international arrival sign terminal six.
Speaker 1: Okay.
Speaker 2: I'm having heartburn right now, so excuse me if I'm
Speaker 2: a little speechless.
Speaker 1: What's going on? Did you have something crazy?
Speaker 2: There's never any rhyme or reason in my body pain.
Speaker 1: It just occurs I see.
Speaker 2: It's bad even if I just mentioned five alarm chili.
Speaker 1: You need a little mailox.
Speaker 2: Yeah, maybe I'm homesick.
Speaker 3: Oh well, Michelle Balloon is going to be in the
Speaker 3: car party soon.
Speaker 2: No with me. I see a turkey body, Yeah, yep.
Speaker 1: We're a lot alike that way.
Speaker 2: Yep, yep. You see people as their cartoon.
Speaker 1: Old turkey body.
Speaker 3: I'd kind of love it if that was like the
Speaker 3: new haunt is if your body reminded someone of a
Speaker 3: big roast turkey, as opposed to four pieces of celery
Speaker 3: laying adjacent to each other.
Speaker 2: Oh, like if you drop them and it's like, oh,
Speaker 2: the prophecy has been told and the celery all makes
Speaker 2: a panagram? Is that what you're talking?
Speaker 1: You know?
Speaker 3: I was saying like that models look like four pieces
Speaker 3: of celery. Oh okay, with one maybe five one down
Speaker 3: the middle.
Speaker 4: Is the body?
Speaker 2: You said the new haunt? I immediately thought of ghosts
Speaker 2: and evil spirits?
Speaker 1: Did I say haunt? I did?
Speaker 2: Yeah you did? It was really out of place. No,
Speaker 2: I think, no, that's the new blank.
Speaker 1: I don't remember what.
Speaker 2: Luckily we're recording, it's okay. We don't have to panic
Speaker 2: until we're near terminal set. Okay, that's when we start
Speaker 2: screaming to get and swerving.
Speaker 1: Erratically, and when the bodies hit.
Speaker 2: The floor, let them, Let the bodies out of the floor,
Speaker 2: Just let them. It's that. That's the what's the highlight
Speaker 2: of this podcast?
Speaker 1: Oh, don't pick it already?
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm sorry. It's all downhill from here down with
Speaker 2: the sickness. Oh ship, We're gonna have to pay a
Speaker 2: lot of royalties to go to a lot of bands
Speaker 2: at OZ.
Speaker 1: Fast Now is disturbed? D I s t R.
Speaker 2: It is misspelled in an interesting way. Disturb apostrophe D.
Speaker 1: I doubt disturbed, disturbed I hope?
Speaker 2: So I bet we could just get in weasel in here.
Speaker 1: Okay, here we go, Here we go.
Speaker 2: I'm very excited to have Michelle in the car. We
Speaker 2: have a lot to catch up on. She's living in Philadelphia,
Speaker 2: l City of brotherly love and a cracked bell. They
Speaker 2: wrote the declar of Independence there at least signed it,
Speaker 2: as well as the Constitution. A lot of people don't
Speaker 2: realize both of those happened in Philadelphia.
Speaker 1: I didn't know that at all.
Speaker 2: Well, I might be telling tales that are not learned
Speaker 2: in school.
Speaker 1: Are you doing tales outside the airport.
Speaker 2: No, No, I'm pretty sure both were signed in Philly because
Speaker 2: we went to look at that bell, which, to be
Speaker 2: perfectly honest, it's just a fucking bell.
Speaker 1: You can't say that.
Speaker 2: You know what. Hey, sorry if I'm spitting in your face, America.
Speaker 2: But it's just a cracked bell Philly.
Speaker 1: Oh dang, But.
Speaker 2: Michelle bloone is no cracked bell, and she's about to
Speaker 2: get in the car for do you need a ride?
Speaker 1: She's no crackedbell?
Speaker 2: Is your Do you have a family member riding a
Speaker 2: bike around town? Missus Steth wish.
Speaker 1: I wasn't looking to the left at all. I was.
Speaker 2: I'm pointing at her, searching, searching there she is. Yeah,
Speaker 2: I'm all.
Speaker 1: She's so excited to not have to sit there any longer.
Speaker 2: She made, she made a very excited face. Oh oh
Speaker 2: she is. Maybe I need to help her. She's got
Speaker 2: a big suitcase, she got.
Speaker 1: Hill. Yeah, we'll be right out.
Speaker 2: We're all plugged up, I mean stuffed up, I mean
Speaker 2: plugged in. Got I Hi, Hi, Michelle. Sorry I couldn't
Speaker 2: help you with your bag. I have where we're all
Speaker 2: wired in and your microphone is there. You'll notice there
Speaker 2: are seatbelt holes. So that is a custom cover.
Speaker 4: Oh, we're doing it already, It's already happening. Oh my god. Yeah, Okay,
Speaker 4: I'm gonna set the mic down so I can properly
Speaker 4: do my seatbelt.
Speaker 1: Okay.
Speaker 2: Michelle Balloon in the car, in.
Speaker 1: The car with us in Los Angeles.
Speaker 2: Fresh, I imagine Philly, unless she was somewhere other than home,
Speaker 2: and I imagine Philadelphia.
Speaker 1: How was it cold?
Speaker 4: No, it was. Actually the weather's been very nice in Philly,
Speaker 4: which I like it. When I'm going somewhere that has
Speaker 4: nice weather. I like it where the place that I'm
Speaker 4: from has bad weather. So I'm kind of disappointed that
Speaker 4: their weather's going to be nice.
Speaker 2: Wait, you like it.
Speaker 4: I want it to be cold there. I want to
Speaker 4: be cold and windy and rainy and awful.
Speaker 2: Oh but it's nice.
Speaker 4: It's nice right now.
Speaker 2: Oh well, that's okay. If both places are nice, that
Speaker 2: just means you made two good decisions in your life.
Speaker 3: Did you just want to feel that difference of like
Speaker 3: that you have traveled all the way across the whole country.
Speaker 4: I just want to feel that like I've I'm somewhere
Speaker 4: else and I'm doing better than the people that I
Speaker 4: left in the other city.
Speaker 2: Oh okay, it's a competition thing with your immediate fans.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that makes sense.
Speaker 2: So you want your baby girl to be cold right now?
Speaker 4: You know, she runs kind of warm, so I feel
Speaker 4: that she's more more prepared equipped to deal with it.
Speaker 4: And she's got she just got I just got a
Speaker 4: really nice raincoat. He's very excited to you, So I
Speaker 4: think that she she'd be fine with it.
Speaker 2: So, yeah, it's out of her best interest because she
Speaker 2: runs hot, so it should be colder there exactly.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 1: How old is she?
Speaker 4: She's two and a half.
Speaker 2: It's pretty cute kid, because she's.
Speaker 4: She's an adorable child.
Speaker 2: She's a very pretty child.
Speaker 4: She's very pretty. She's like she's I mean, she's she's
Speaker 4: blonde hair and blue eyes. She's not that classic you know,
Speaker 4: knee jerk your kids is very cute kind of Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that awful, classic knee jerk Hitler reaction.
Speaker 4: I used to say. I used to feel like like
Speaker 4: it was almost like I was embarrassed that my child
Speaker 4: was so aryan baby. It was just like, oh, I
Speaker 4: just felt like it was just you know, the Ariyan
Speaker 4: nation coming up to me, you know, and telling me
Speaker 4: how pretty my.
Speaker 1: Kid, Thank you for making another one.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I had a joke about ones, but it never worked.
Speaker 4: It worked occasionally, but not enough to where I felt
Speaker 4: it outweigh the fact that I sounded really racist when
Speaker 4: I also had this joke that that I stopped doing
Speaker 4: for the same reason, where like this uh Latina cashier
Speaker 4: said how she wanted to have a baby just like mine,
Speaker 4: and I'm like, uh, are you gonna fuck a ghosts?
Speaker 2: Did you do it? Did you do a Latina accent
Speaker 2: when you did that job?
Speaker 4: You know? I I did not. I shouldn't know. You
Speaker 4: shouldn't or called in somebody to do one for you.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you should. That's what I do when it when
Speaker 2: there's accents in my act, I coin at someone in
Speaker 2: the audience. You Mexican, you'll have this accent. I'm not racist,
Speaker 2: so I'm not gonna do the accent.
Speaker 4: Would you say these words and hand Rich Gabe style?
Speaker 4: Hand them an index card?
Speaker 2: But I'm Panamanian. It's okay. You'll still be able to
Speaker 2: do it. You like them, And that's just so I'm
Speaker 2: not racist. Rich Gabe. What happened on Rich Gabe?
Speaker 4: Oh, I don't know. He lives in Portland, and married.
Speaker 2: Yeah we have. It's one of these comics.
Speaker 4: He did like two bits that were very very.
Speaker 2: Great and they were a total like it was an
Speaker 2: entire act these bits. It like took exactly five.
Speaker 4: Minutes to do, and everybody loved him and he won
Speaker 4: the Funniest Person and off I dated him for a time.
Speaker 2: We forgot about that slap the skin, but yeah, it's
Speaker 2: like one happen.
Speaker 4: He was very funny travel thing.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he was great.
Speaker 4: Just lazy, I mean just lazy. No, you just didn't want.
Speaker 2: To have to a lot of people just stopped doing it.
Speaker 3: No he did.
Speaker 4: He just did not want to. I have to do
Speaker 4: more stuff and and be somewhere. No, that's not good.
Speaker 1: He's hard.
Speaker 2: The podcast and so rich Rich Rich.
Speaker 4: I just said you were very funny.
Speaker 1: He felt were having a private conversation and.
Speaker 2: We only meant lazy when you were working working at
Speaker 2: the bookshelf store.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, I forgot about that was when I dated it.
Speaker 4: But yeah, and I love his wife Susan now like
Speaker 4: we do the rest of the podcast.
Speaker 1: Dedicate it to him.
Speaker 4: I forget that. I forget that when I'm in public,
Speaker 4: that there's other people that live around me that might
Speaker 4: know the people I'm talking about when I'm on a microphone.
Speaker 3: You know, when you were talking about sir, I was
Speaker 3: gonna say, for that guy, what's his name again?
Speaker 4: Rich Gabe? Rich Gabe, very funny, very nice person.
Speaker 3: But also I completely relate to that. When I started
Speaker 3: stand up, it was like what I wanted to do
Speaker 3: all my life. And then once I started, I was like,
Speaker 3: this fucking sucks. It's like constant work, constant and constant work.
Speaker 4: I want to quit all the time.
Speaker 1: It's all not that much payoff.
Speaker 4: I get like, if you get to make oh, this
Speaker 4: is gonna be great that I'm gonna do. But then
Speaker 4: it's like I actually have to do it, like I
Speaker 4: wish there was, Like I always wish there's like a
Speaker 4: just a comedy robot version of me I could send.
Speaker 4: You actually have to do it. Oh, I have to
Speaker 4: be the one to do that thing that's a lot
Speaker 4: of pressure.
Speaker 1: And stand there when they don't like it. That's been happening.
Speaker 1: I've been doing music with Brendon Davis.
Speaker 4: Yes, which I've seen you do music and I love
Speaker 4: it very much.
Speaker 1: Thank you, Michelle. I love you. I've already told you though.
Speaker 2: You tell people that one time a year, and it's
Speaker 2: usually during.
Speaker 3: Christmas, and it's and I make it worthy because I
Speaker 3: just really overdo it to the point where they get uncomfortable.
Speaker 1: And that makes up for the rest of the year
Speaker 1: where I'm just kind of cold.
Speaker 4: Right now, you're still building me up.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's right.
Speaker 1: We're still on the upswing there, ready for it to
Speaker 1: fall down. But uh oh we we for two nights
Speaker 1: in a row.
Speaker 3: He agreed to shows in a row to do shows
Speaker 3: at this place called the Clubhouse, which is like almost like.
Speaker 1: A generic version of UCB.
Speaker 3: It's like someone bought a storefront and there's like four
Speaker 3: different rooms and they have improv classes during the day
Speaker 3: and then they have all kinds of different comedy shows
Speaker 3: at night.
Speaker 4: There.
Speaker 2: I like that place. Yeah, it's and it's it's somewhere
Speaker 2: in La kind of by.
Speaker 3: It's off Vermont, you know where the John's on Vermont
Speaker 3: is by fat It's in that strip.
Speaker 1: So it's like a weird storefront.
Speaker 2: You would kind of never could I was looking for
Speaker 2: it and I had mapped to it, wast to it, whatever,
Speaker 2: and I was standing there and I couldn't see the sign. Yes,
Speaker 2: someone had to come out of the door, which was
Speaker 2: right in front of me, but the sign had this
Speaker 2: creaky like crooked ass like the clubhouse no girls allowed
Speaker 2: sky but it was yeah, it's very nice, Okay, continuell.
Speaker 3: My only point was just for so two nights in
Speaker 3: a row, we had to do shows there, and so
Speaker 3: it's not it's not a place where I would see
Speaker 3: necessarily see like my peers or people that I know.
Speaker 3: It's a lot of people who are new to comedy
Speaker 3: or just trying stuff out. And I realized I was
Speaker 3: like sitting in the back, like I'm the hugest diva
Speaker 3: in the world because I never want to do shows
Speaker 3: like this or rooms where I don't automatically have like
Speaker 3: the earned goodwill.
Speaker 4: Of just you know what I mean, Like people know
Speaker 4: are like, oh, I all Karen's coming.
Speaker 3: Up, yeah right, Instead like in that place, I was
Speaker 3: just one of the two of us, were just another
Speaker 3: act on the show where everyone kind of brought their
Speaker 3: own friends or it was a lot of improf people
Speaker 3: like and I was just sitting back there getting all
Speaker 3: like super uncomfortable.
Speaker 1: And it was like, Oh, that's because you.
Speaker 3: Expect, right like to basically to be lauded everywhere you go,
Speaker 3: and you haven't even done anything yet.
Speaker 2: Just just earn it just in case you feel uncomfortable
Speaker 2: feeling that way. That's exactly how I felt too. I'm like,
Speaker 2: I really was like, oh shit, no one here knows me,
Speaker 2: and they're aren't. They're here to see sketch and stuff
Speaker 2: and I and they weren't. Once I started talking, They're like,
Speaker 2: there's this guy, and I'm like, what, I have to
Speaker 2: prove myself.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I've been doing.
Speaker 2: This in this town for many years.
Speaker 4: Yeah, that'sinitely because I do stand up in New York
Speaker 4: now a lot, like usually like every few weeks, and
Speaker 4: there's so many comics I don't know. So I get
Speaker 4: on these shows by virtue of you know, people I
Speaker 4: know from here, and then you know pretty much the
Speaker 4: whole lineup, unless people are coming in from LA. You know,
Speaker 4: I don't know it. So it's like, Okay, well, I
Speaker 4: guess I have to do something where they think I'm funny.
Speaker 4: I guess that guys, I wouldn't care, but right now
Speaker 4: I guess. I guess I want to be funny so
Speaker 4: they know I'm funny and they remember.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's it's so funny, and it's like, uh, what
Speaker 3: isn't that the reason that I'm there in the first play.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, yeah, but.
Speaker 3: It actually isn't. It's like I think I'm there to
Speaker 3: get my hair brushed by you know, a door quote
Speaker 3: unquote adoring fans. Right, It's like, what are you talking about?
Speaker 3: It's supposed to be a comedian.
Speaker 2: For me, it has to be one or the other.
Speaker 2: I because I really really enjoy it when I'm in
Speaker 2: a place like I was just in boise Ido, no
Speaker 2: one really knows me except for the staff there. And
Speaker 2: then it's that's very freeing and I can be uh,
Speaker 2: you know, do old jokes or ah, yeah, like I
Speaker 2: used to in a way that I don't do anymore
Speaker 2: around here, or I don't know. It's kind of ringing,
Speaker 2: like we're.
Speaker 4: Out of la or New York and you're just like, oh,
Speaker 4: people aren't going to be like what kind of premises
Speaker 4: are they doing?
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, yeah, I got a lot of experts like armchairs.
Speaker 4: Yeah yeah.
Speaker 2: So it's freeing to have support, and it's also freeing
Speaker 2: to have absolutely no one know who you are. But
Speaker 2: it's that mixed situation. But like a bunch of audience
Speaker 2: people that don't know you, And then my Dad's sitting
Speaker 2: in the middle. That's what That's a nightmare to me.
Speaker 4: Like Philly has been nice for like you did stand
Speaker 4: up there when we were you know, you did the
Speaker 4: like that one bar show we went to. You also
Speaker 4: to stand the club, Like yeah, it's it was like,
Speaker 4: it's so great to like you after being in LA
Speaker 4: for ten years to move to Philly. I mean it's
Speaker 4: not the best, but it's so it's great for a
Speaker 4: lot of reasons. Is that I get all, I was
Speaker 4: new to all these people, mostly new and and it's
Speaker 4: just like they're so like happy that I'm there now,
Speaker 4: you know, right, And it's just so because it's you know,
Speaker 4: just all there's a huge scene there, the young scene,
Speaker 4: and they're they're really really funny guys. And but yeah,
Speaker 4: it's so that's been like it's like I am able
Speaker 4: to write more because it's lower stakes comedy. Yeah, and
Speaker 4: then forcing myself to write and so then I can
Speaker 4: just do stuff there, force myself to write and like
Speaker 4: actually risk on doing some premises and then go to
Speaker 4: LA New York and and and sort of try to
Speaker 4: sound cool.
Speaker 2: How do you get to New York from Philly?
Speaker 4: I did the train, Oh.
Speaker 2: The train public transits something that exists in every American city.
Speaker 2: Ohcept Los Angeles.
Speaker 4: Yeah, no, it's awesome. Yeah, an hour and twenty minutes.
Speaker 2: That's great.
Speaker 1: Oh that's nice.
Speaker 4: Yeah. And I just was in DC on Friday and
Speaker 4: and I took the train there and that was I
Speaker 4: took the Acela because I wasn't paying for it and
Speaker 4: which is the fast train, And that was only an
Speaker 4: hour and a half. Wow, to get to d C.
Speaker 2: That's great. It's so cool that you're like in the.
Speaker 4: Midle there's so many things.
Speaker 2: Yeah, all those cities are so close to each other.
Speaker 2: And when I when you compare it to just the
Speaker 2: state of California, Montana, where I'm from, it's like, oh,
Speaker 2: I want to go see my uncle. That's a three
Speaker 2: day drive. Like we're old Wild West people. I don't know.
Speaker 4: Did you was how close is Boise from from Missoula?
Speaker 2: Oh? Nine hours?
Speaker 4: Oh okay, so your dad did not make the trip?
Speaker 2: No, no, But I have cousins there and they they
Speaker 2: it was interesting too to hook up with them again
Speaker 2: because they both spent quite a bit of time in
Speaker 2: prison and hard times when we were younger, uh, in
Speaker 2: foster homes and stuff. But they were great, and I
Speaker 2: was talking to them, and even though I could tell
Speaker 2: there's been this rough life that they've led, they really
Speaker 2: were kind of like me. Like the the way my
Speaker 2: cousin was talking, I was like, oh man, you are
Speaker 2: related to me. Yeah, So then I feel like I
Speaker 2: have spent some time in prison. So I feel like
Speaker 2: I came back from Boise a little harder.
Speaker 1: Yeah, oh yeah, and you got that tear drop?
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, there is the fact that I got this
Speaker 2: tear drop.
Speaker 4: You're going to be in get hard to Oh my.
Speaker 2: God, I I get angry when I see that billboard?
Speaker 2: Does anyone else get angry about it? Existing? Kevin Hart
Speaker 2: can just go straight to hack as far as I'm concerned.
Speaker 4: Are you said? What that same hack? Kind of your
Speaker 4: tear drop test?
Speaker 2: You know what? This is fun?
Speaker 4: We'll give you you kiss and excuse me.
Speaker 2: But I've I have some cousins that are in gangs.
Speaker 2: It's it's that's do It's this damn figgly foo that
Speaker 2: he's been up to. That's that's chit canery. And I'm.
Speaker 4: Get I don't like this. I don't like to swear
Speaker 4: around Tenny and so, but it's really hard for me
Speaker 4: not to be in the car not say motherfucker. So
Speaker 4: I I I say buster now instead, it will just
Speaker 4: really no, I just say buster. Look at that buster,
Speaker 4: Look at that Buster.
Speaker 2: Oh that's great, that Buster.
Speaker 4: And it's satisfying. It's satisfying in a way that I
Speaker 4: needed to be because motherfucker.
Speaker 2: So and my sister was saying motherfucker in front of
Speaker 2: her kids the whole time, and they just knew that
Speaker 2: they couldn't. And when she said it, she got a
Speaker 2: fuck her and they go up, you owe us. She
Speaker 2: had to put money in a jar or something, and
Speaker 2: they get the money. So if my sister continues to swear,
Speaker 2: and they never do swear, they make money. She she
Speaker 2: made a little business out of her. Yeah, yeah, for
Speaker 2: the kids. But Tenny is Tenny is.
Speaker 4: My mom never swore around me, so I just it's weird.
Speaker 4: I've always felt like uncomfortable about swearing around kids.
Speaker 3: My parents always swore around me. And then when I
Speaker 3: would swear, my dad be like what it? Oh my god,
Speaker 3: I've heard you say.
Speaker 4: Yeah. See that's why, like I would feel like it's permissive,
Speaker 4: even if you're saying it's not.
Speaker 2: I'm afraid that friends used to come to my house
Speaker 2: and as entertainment. Watch me swear around.
Speaker 1: My mom because she didn't care, like she doesn't know.
Speaker 2: I mean, well, I was angry at her. Oh I
Speaker 2: see I didn't care. Ah yeah, sorry, sorry forty year
Speaker 2: old mom. Sorry I said things.
Speaker 1: That's that's what you were supposed to do as a teen.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I was angry. Man.
Speaker 1: That was the setup you were.
Speaker 4: You had it all like you were like an eighties
Speaker 4: movie wrapped up, you know, angry teen skateboarding away.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I was that way crazy.
Speaker 4: Want to hair?
Speaker 2: Oh we don't.
Speaker 1: Oh no, no, I just didn't know.
Speaker 2: Oh, we're going to a hotel in Fairfax and Melrose.
Speaker 3: Okay, maybe we'll just go down.
Speaker 4: It's just am I being kidnapped?
Speaker 2: That yeah?
Speaker 4: Sorry, And I mean you do love me.
Speaker 1: I love you so much. When I'm taking you to
Speaker 1: my house and I'm gonna hobble you.
Speaker 2: Oh, and I'm gonna hobble you. She's gonna hobble your peach.
Speaker 2: Everyone here knows I'm talking about turning you to shoes. Yeah,
Speaker 2: we're gonna yeah, sorry, we put a bag on your head,
Speaker 2: but we will be dropping you off. We're kidnapping you,
Speaker 2: but we are taking you to the hotel. You will.
Speaker 2: So it's actually pretty low stakes.
Speaker 1: It's a service of the hotel.
Speaker 2: Yes.
Speaker 4: Oh it's a small world. Yeah, I mean it really is.
Speaker 2: It's just a virtual experience that they've been trying at
Speaker 2: that hotel Oculus Rift.
Speaker 4: Yah.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 4: The satellite plan.
Speaker 2: Yes, they're like, do you want to violently experience our
Speaker 2: kidnap plan?
Speaker 4: You checked that it was defaulted.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 4: The website website. I don't want to be opted in
Speaker 4: right away websites. I think that's against the ftc uham
Speaker 4: Loss or the FDA.
Speaker 2: I'm not either way. It's not approved.
Speaker 3: Look, it's the policy of the days in so that's yeah.
Speaker 4: You're supposed to be like, oh, I won't say the name,
Speaker 4: but it's something like blaze Blind.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, it's the hotel low Hotel Blicks. Yeah, not
Speaker 2: that they blow sponsor if do you need to ride?
Speaker 2: No tel sex thank you?
Speaker 4: Do you guys have sponsors?
Speaker 2: Nos?
Speaker 4: Yeah I do. Oh oh my god, I forgot about
Speaker 4: this thing that I get to do that you just reminded.
Speaker 4: My mom said for because they have these uncomfortable bowling shirts.
Speaker 4: Uh huh okay, and I can't remember who's who's sponsoring them.
Speaker 4: Her bowling team City, Yeah, in Sun City, Arizona. And
Speaker 4: I said how much would nice bowling shirts cost? And
Speaker 4: she's like, I don't know, like you know, twenty five
Speaker 4: thirty dollars each. I'm like, if I buy you guys
Speaker 4: bowling shirts, can I sponsor your team? She goes yes,
Speaker 4: will you call them? Like it was like she said
Speaker 4: that they're called the Zoo Crew that's part of the deal.
Speaker 4: I'm like, can they be called Michelle balloon Zu Crew?
Speaker 1: Yes?
Speaker 4: Can I put a big picture of myself?
Speaker 1: No? Sure?
Speaker 4: How about I do some designs? And she's totally gonna
Speaker 4: let me sponsor her team. She says there has to
Speaker 4: be an animal in it. I thought i'd remember when
Speaker 4: we went and go saw those tigers. Chris, I have
Speaker 4: this Polari picture holding a baby tiger. It's a terrible
Speaker 4: picture of me, but I am holding a baby tiger
Speaker 4: and that would be great to put on a bowling jersey.
Speaker 2: It would be hard to but you have to heat
Speaker 2: transfer a photo of it.
Speaker 4: Or oh sounds like you know how to do it.
Speaker 2: I do. I do, and it's not gonna look good.
Speaker 2: You want their shirts.
Speaker 4: To look good, I'm gonna have to have.
Speaker 2: You're gonna want to maybe some original artwork, some vectorized
Speaker 2: line art.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, you know. Chris worked at a T shirt
Speaker 4: place in Austin, Texas, met him.
Speaker 1: What was it called text screen?
Speaker 4: Yeah, it was right by that tie place, wasn't it ice.
Speaker 2: Yeah. I lived above the type place. Oh yeah, the
Speaker 2: noodle house. And then at the end of the week,
Speaker 2: I would go down to Night's that do you have
Speaker 2: any leftover food? And she would give me.
Speaker 4: I didn't know that. That's funny.
Speaker 2: I was poor.
Speaker 4: We would have food in our house, like we we
Speaker 4: We'd be like, I don't really want to eat this, Well,
Speaker 4: maybe Chris will come over.
Speaker 1: And eat it.
Speaker 2: I literally I would drive across county people, I would.
Speaker 4: I would just have things. And one time you ate
Speaker 4: my roommates left over, I'm gonna no one knows that
Speaker 4: this person is Tiffany. Remember she had like eat the
Speaker 4: opium food and you ate the leftovers and then she
Speaker 4: got really mad at you.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, and I'm okay with I'm okay with that.
Speaker 4: She's kind of a dour person.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and a huge listener of this show.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I know, I feel apology Republican.
Speaker 1: Leftovers.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I would eat him again. I would eat him again,
Speaker 2: and I would still knock knock over Jason's badger dancing Badgers.
Speaker 2: It was like I'd spit on a family member. He
Speaker 2: had this college mascot that would dance the Wisconsin who
Speaker 2: were just they would just play duke, and I wondered
Speaker 2: if it would break up their marriage.
Speaker 4: It did not know.
Speaker 2: They're still They're still living there, living hard, living hard
Speaker 2: with like Kevin Hart hard livers.
Speaker 4: But anyhow, enough about people we don't really care about.
Speaker 2: I did work. I work shirt yeah, t shirt shopping.
Speaker 4: Chris and I have known each other for quite a
Speaker 4: long time. We started doing stand up together in two
Speaker 4: thousand and two thousand is when I started. But you
Speaker 4: started a few months before.
Speaker 2: My back up my story that I told before she
Speaker 2: got in the cover. Let's see, Okay, okay, so tell
Speaker 2: us more about this first time you did comedy.
Speaker 4: Oh, the first time I did stand Okay, the first
Speaker 4: time I did stand up. John Raven was the open
Speaker 4: my coat.
Speaker 2: She's backing up.
Speaker 4: But I know what you're talking about. You were this
Speaker 4: now here. I know what he's talking about. The second
Speaker 4: time I did stand up, Okay. Chris Fairbanks was the host. Okay,
Speaker 4: he had a mustache, he had handcuffs, and he called
Speaker 4: himself the Comedy Cup and I thought he was like
Speaker 4: twenty years older than I was. It was and I
Speaker 4: thought I was like thought he was. I mean, I
Speaker 4: just I was like, didn't call myself, you call the
Speaker 4: comedy car And who is this guy? I did that night?
Speaker 2: I was doing a character.
Speaker 4: I didn't know anything about comedy started.
Speaker 2: I'm scared to start doing stand up?
Speaker 1: What did you? Sorry? Can I just ask what would
Speaker 1: the comedy cops say? When he got on stage?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Don't remember I pulled over a woman named Miranda the
Speaker 2: other day. I didn't have no alright, already what.
Speaker 3: You slid right into that like you've been waiting to
Speaker 3: say it for twenty years.
Speaker 2: I don't know. I think that's how I said it
Speaker 2: was so I remember it being very popular at the time.
Speaker 1: You were a cop that was doing comedy.
Speaker 2: I didn't know what else to do.
Speaker 4: Okay, how long and when did you start? So I
Speaker 4: started in February two thousand. You started just before that, right?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah, yeah, so I was I had reached the
Speaker 2: ranks of hosting the open mic.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'll be a room open mic.
Speaker 2: That's where we started.
Speaker 4: That is the valve, Karen, you shouldn't. And our friend
Speaker 4: Mary Mario to Giorgio, is doing a great, great job
Speaker 4: with it.
Speaker 2: A lot of people call Mario, but his name's Mary.
Speaker 4: It is the people. Do you call Mario?
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's spelled.
Speaker 4: I fucking hate that place. That Mormon they're building one
Speaker 4: of these big Mormon castles. Is anybody Mormon in here
Speaker 4: and they're building on it. I'm so mad because Philadelphia
Speaker 4: so historic with such beautiful old buildings, and I love
Speaker 4: it so much, and then they're building this fake, like
Speaker 4: like luxurious castle where people are gonna go by and
Speaker 4: be like, oh look, let's take a picture in front
Speaker 4: of this famous building, like fuck you, it's it's wait.
Speaker 3: Mormons are like opening up places in Philadelphia.
Speaker 4: Yeah, the huge like that. It looks like that, and
Speaker 4: it's right in the middle of town.
Speaker 1: Organized religion can be so creepy sometimes.
Speaker 4: No, And I brought my old my older sister was
Speaker 4: visiting me here and we drove past that and night
Speaker 4: it gets all lit up and and she's like, oh,
Speaker 4: she's I've seen that before. I'm like, no, you haven't. No,
Speaker 4: I swear, And though you want to think that you've
Speaker 4: seen it before. You've never seen it before. I said,
Speaker 4: it's just faice to look like it's some sort of auspicious.
Speaker 4: Is that the word I'm thinking of, right, auspicious, important, ostentatious, ostentatious,
Speaker 4: that's probably better ridiculous, sinister. Oh but yeah. And I
Speaker 4: was like, and I got angry about it because I'm like, no, God,
Speaker 4: it's just like fucking you know, like it's like scientology,
Speaker 4: fake psychiatry museum, just checking you.
Speaker 3: You know, So they basically made themselves look like they
Speaker 3: were also a historic thing that you should visit in Philadelphia.
Speaker 4: That's my opinion of it, because I feel like that's
Speaker 4: how it comes off, you know, And I just I
Speaker 4: find it.
Speaker 2: Just well, these are strong words coming from a woman
Speaker 2: who's currently sitting on a sheet with holes in to
Speaker 2: use the No, it's our old joke. We don't know
Speaker 2: the difference between Judaism and but like we said, we
Speaker 2: don't like it organized.
Speaker 1: Why?
Speaker 4: I like, why do you have you have dogs?
Speaker 1: Yes? Okay, can't you see all of the hair everywhere?
Speaker 2: I want to start the world whir first? Unorganized religion?
Speaker 4: Okay, just when.
Speaker 2: Where's the phone number to the pastor again like that
Speaker 2: kind of like we really just don't know what we're doing.
Speaker 1: Every it's always a half number la.
Speaker 2: I don't like about organized religion is because everything is
Speaker 2: in order and everything.
Speaker 4: Why does it have to be Sundays all the time?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Yeah, I want mine to be.
Speaker 4: Can we read a different book again?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 4: Mind?
Speaker 2: The gods are gonna flip flop opinions will change from
Speaker 2: one week to the next, and we don't have anyone's
Speaker 2: phone number. Do you guys like my unorganized religion?
Speaker 1: I like it better than the comedy CoP's.
Speaker 2: He was great. The comedy Cop brought people joy.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but he killed a lot of people too.
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's the dark side of the common.
Speaker 1: You guys, look right now, they're tearing that building apart.
Speaker 4: I had a cardiac arrest Beverly Hill.
Speaker 1: They're they're drilling into the just.
Speaker 2: Now getting started.
Speaker 4: Are they? Are they getting out with clues for Whitney
Speaker 4: Houston's mysterious death?
Speaker 1: Is that where she went down?
Speaker 4: That's where she.
Speaker 2: Died, right there on that ledge. We got a got
Speaker 2: a hammer. Oh, here's a drop of Bobby brown'siz. That's
Speaker 2: what they're saying. I knew he did it. I knew
Speaker 2: he did. That is interesting. I love you know, when
Speaker 2: it comes down to it, we're all just fucking seven
Speaker 2: year old boys are excited about.
Speaker 4: I love seeing cement mixers. I'm gonna just throw that
Speaker 4: out there. What I like cement mixers? Oh okay, I
Speaker 4: don't know. I like eddie mixers. Apparently it is fun
Speaker 4: to walk.
Speaker 1: It's so funny you can really hear it.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, Oh wow, they're really getting after it. And
Speaker 2: look at that guy spraying. He sprang it with water
Speaker 2: at talube. The the puncher, Oh looks sparks.
Speaker 4: I hope that was really high tech. It doesn't look
Speaker 4: like you're your grandpa's whole whole puncher. No, no, they're moving.
Speaker 2: This is your grandson's whole puncher. I mean I hope
Speaker 2: they marked lines in the power line, you know. I
Speaker 2: hope that's That's one thing that Beverly Hills Hotel doesn't need.
Speaker 2: It is a needless outage. Look, they started, they're a
Speaker 2: little bit.
Speaker 4: Are they Is this place being demolished?
Speaker 2: Are you about to are if they have the right
Speaker 2: to be doing that?
Speaker 4: Do you kind if I find it's such a historic building?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Are those what if we're just watching really rich vandals. Ye,
Speaker 2: like we bought this equipment.
Speaker 1: We bought this huge weird poker. It seems to be
Speaker 1: able to knock anything down.
Speaker 2: The big weird with the I like to call it
Speaker 2: a puncher. Maybe loop the puncher you guys love then.
Speaker 4: Maybe the installation art like eye way ways. It's like signifying.
Speaker 2: Right, I was gonna say, what they're doing is just
Speaker 2: the new graffiti.
Speaker 1: That's right, bear it all down?
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's what that means. It really stands for a
Speaker 4: lot of bigger things. Yeah, that I can't think of.
Speaker 2: Yeah, well, the Berlin Mall comes to mind. Nineteen eighty nine.
Speaker 4: It was it eighty nine.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that one time.
Speaker 2: Time, remember and David Hasselhoff came out in a suit
Speaker 2: made of lights and performed what looked on a feeling
Speaker 2: yes on the walk it up on the Berlin guys.
Speaker 2: These girls are teaming up on me and I'm.
Speaker 1: Just asking a question that wasn't really you think.
Speaker 4: That clip would play over and over and over until
Speaker 4: the end of time.
Speaker 2: He had a suit that lit up like urban cowboys,
Speaker 2: and it was lit up. It was like a mariachi
Speaker 2: person souper.
Speaker 4: But my memory of the comedy cop maybe exaggerated.
Speaker 2: As as there. I wasn't called the comedy cop. I
Speaker 2: was just like, Hey, I'm a detective so and so
Speaker 2: from the third precinct. I've been wanting to try some jokes.
Speaker 2: It wasn't like, Hey, I'm Chris the comedy cop. Let's
Speaker 2: see what I got in this bag here? Oh, this
Speaker 2: is called Michael Jackson's bicycle.
Speaker 1: That would be the comedy mail man.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I guess so, oh who addressing Michael Jackson's next
Speaker 2: letter is to Rush Limbaugh. I wonder what he has
Speaker 2: to say. Then I'd go into an impression. I actually
Speaker 2: like this act that we're writer.
Speaker 3: I think you should read premiere it at your one
Speaker 3: hour special at Meltown's.
Speaker 2: I would love to, but I don't have a mustache.
Speaker 1: Michelle. If you have a show to night, are you
Speaker 1: gonna go to Chris's show?
Speaker 4: I did I text you Chris saying I was sorry
Speaker 4: I'm not going, or emailed in some form of communication,
Speaker 4: or maybe I thought it really loud.
Speaker 2: Had I accepted it?
Speaker 4: But I don't.
Speaker 2: I don't know.
Speaker 4: Maybe maybe you're not speaking to me, but no, but no,
Speaker 4: I have a I have a show tonight, and is
Speaker 4: your down to tomorrow, Yes, tomorrow show.
Speaker 2: The head is in the clouds right now. Yeah, show tomorrow.
Speaker 4: I'm going did I say tonight? Yeah?
Speaker 3: Yeah, And now everyone's gonna go, oh, guys, don't listen
Speaker 3: to me, I'm.
Speaker 4: Doing the business tomorrow night. And when I told Jim
Speaker 4: Hamilton that I was doing the business, he goes trader, Oh,
Speaker 4: it's a little joy and he thinks he owns all
Speaker 4: comedy a little doy. Yes, I said it, Jim, even
Speaker 4: though I know you don't listen to podcasts.
Speaker 2: Oh, that's hilarious. Even though that during his show, one
Speaker 2: of the girls that runs the business feeds some free
Speaker 2: drinks all night. He's gotta be like, oh, we're letting
Speaker 2: you have it.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I own comedy.
Speaker 2: Yeah we what do we call him? He was a
Speaker 2: rape comic?
Speaker 4: Oh go because he his and it's better now.
Speaker 2: But he's a great comic.
Speaker 4: He's a great I'm not saying he's better now. I'm
Speaker 4: saying the content is better, right right right to rapy
Speaker 4: humor he used to do. I am got my extra.
Speaker 2: Extra long fingers, so they know I'll do it joke,
Speaker 2: Hamilton's old joke that I still really love. It's like
Speaker 2: I'll do they say in the.
Speaker 4: Bedroom, that's how I used to talk on stage. He
Speaker 4: doesn't do it.
Speaker 2: Your physical attributes and I have really long fingers. So
Speaker 2: the next time we were in bed, I fucking choked.
Speaker 4: Her a ram.
Speaker 2: It was I did it wrong. I think everyone's like
Speaker 2: bracing themselves. It's like, oh no, he's gonna do a
Speaker 2: fingering joke.
Speaker 3: Got it is a mislead into a rape show.
Speaker 2: Is just because he's you're right.
Speaker 1: It was just a choke. You're right. He could be
Speaker 1: doing any anything.
Speaker 2: With the She could be saying, I like it when
Speaker 2: men choke me. We're living in that era now.
Speaker 3: He could be leaning off the bed and to it
Speaker 3: and just gently choking.
Speaker 2: Maybe she was giving the international sign of please choke me.
Speaker 1: Maybe there's a lot of bitches that want it.
Speaker 4: Fortunately, we don't know how she was dressed exactly.
Speaker 2: She might have been wearing choke me shorts. What okay?
Speaker 4: What?
Speaker 1: So many emergencies today.
Speaker 4: Oh they're going to like next, we're gonna drive another
Speaker 4: black and there's gonna be a fruit cart in away.
Speaker 2: We're not have to run rights, I'm gonna have to
Speaker 2: dive onto an awning.
Speaker 1: Suddenly we're on the Cinamonica Peer. I don't want to
Speaker 1: drive down here.
Speaker 2: I don't want to mess up. The city is set up.
Speaker 1: We're in Beverly Hills now, Michelle, do you feel you're
Speaker 1: finally at home?
Speaker 4: I am. I'm getting. It's like I'm reaching. I'm reaching
Speaker 4: where I feel most comfortable.
Speaker 2: Oh. I remember that city hall as being the police
Speaker 2: in Beverly Hills. Cop.
Speaker 3: I wonder if there are any comedy cops inside of.
Speaker 4: This comedy cop would notice it's a weird comedy.
Speaker 2: Before I even said Beverly Hills Cop, you had started
Speaker 2: your sentence. I know you were wondering if anything was
Speaker 2: in there, and you changed it.
Speaker 1: No, that's not true. I was going to say comedy cop,
Speaker 1: no matter what, no matter what you said.
Speaker 4: So you said on Twitter that this was coming out today.
Speaker 4: Do you really put out your podcast the same day.
Speaker 2: In emergency situations? Yes, it was. We are usually our
Speaker 2: episodes come out Monday morning. First thing.
Speaker 4: Huh. Oh that's we should have this conversation a few
Speaker 4: a minute ago, because then he could have said emergency
Speaker 4: and then a fire truck.
Speaker 2: All right, great, and I could have done my five
Speaker 2: alarm chili joke again. You missed that.
Speaker 4: Comedy chili chef?
Speaker 2: Do you still make chili shell?
Speaker 4: I never made chili.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you used to make a mean chili.
Speaker 4: Are you?
Speaker 2: Yeah, you made chili ones.
Speaker 4: I made spaghetti.
Speaker 2: Ah, spaghetti same death.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Well you were supposed to ask me if I'm still
Speaker 2: calling spaghetti chili?
Speaker 4: Are you still calling spaghetti chili?
Speaker 2: Yeah? I always have, always will.
Speaker 4: Okay, happening? Is this back to your improproots? Am I
Speaker 4: dropping the ball here?
Speaker 2: No? If you're just no ending me.
Speaker 4: I know, no, I'm done.
Speaker 2: Oh we're going. When I first moved to Los Angeles,
Speaker 2: I lived here in West Hollywood and it's where a
Speaker 2: lot of gay men live and women, I think probably,
Speaker 2: but mostly men. And I would go to the gymnasium
Speaker 2: here at twenty four hour fitness and I'd go up
Speaker 2: there and it was like nineteen ninety nine, so back
Speaker 2: then it was a different time, and maybe I was
Speaker 2: a little nervous.
Speaker 4: It wasn't ninety nine, it was two thousand, like three
Speaker 4: or four.
Speaker 2: Yeah, this was around three or oh, and I uh,
Speaker 2: And I would go there and I'm kind of getting there.
Speaker 2: I'm like, oh, man, what if what if? You know
Speaker 2: one of these guys is gonna snap me in the
Speaker 2: butt with a towel or something, right, and they fucking
Speaker 2: all ignored me like it was an ugly troll. Yeah,
Speaker 2: I would like.
Speaker 1: Because I think you might be. Oh, I'm sorry to.
Speaker 2: Tell you there was two thousand and three, Karen. I
Speaker 2: was looking pretty fucking good.
Speaker 3: I'm saying, of course you were looking good. But these
Speaker 3: men are there.
Speaker 2: They were all huge. Yeah, they were all physical specimens,
Speaker 2: and I was that quality.
Speaker 4: Twenty four hour fitness and the crunch I think on
Speaker 4: sunset are both. I was, you can't, you can't. You
Speaker 4: can't bring your stuff up in there expect to.
Speaker 2: Get They were not wanting any of my stuff. No, no,
Speaker 2: I was really it really did hurt my feelings. I
Speaker 2: was like, God, no one will give me the time
Speaker 2: of day. Here.
Speaker 4: Is that when you grew out your mustache?
Speaker 2: No, it's when I grew out of Yes, no, I
Speaker 2: didn't have I.
Speaker 1: Didn't started wearing those really smalldn I'm sure.
Speaker 2: Yes, it's when I just just spid the I started
Speaker 2: having love making with men. Now do you guys like me?
Speaker 4: Yeah, look at me a second, this dick.
Speaker 2: See I could be like you guys, see.
Speaker 1: Mich where did you live when you lived.
Speaker 4: Here, I when I when I first moved here, I
Speaker 4: lived with Maria Bamford and lose feelss because I was
Speaker 4: house sitting for her while she was at the Melbourne
Speaker 4: Comedy Festival. And then I stayed living with her until Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 4: you came over a bunch of times, I think, Chris,
Speaker 4: and then and then I got my own place on
Speaker 4: uh Orange on Sycamore and Franklin close right by there's
Speaker 4: like a crack park right there's right across the street
Speaker 4: from the Magic Castle. Actually right across the street from
Speaker 4: the Highland Gardens Hotel, which is where Janice Joplin.
Speaker 2: Oh drank herself to do Right now, they're punching holes
Speaker 2: in the side of that holding to prove it. Oh,
Speaker 2: that was a different exhausted callback.
Speaker 1: I can't it was a crawlback.
Speaker 2: That's great. Thanks callback.
Speaker 4: It's Chris. You can use that the next time.
Speaker 3: He'ssen tonight at You're One Hour Special at Miltown time.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm tomorrow tomorrow. I can make it now that
Speaker 4: I think about it.
Speaker 2: Tomorrow everyone's going to go to the wrong comedy concert.
Speaker 4: But what if people listen to this in the morning tomorrow?
Speaker 4: You need to establish that. Tomorrow is April.
Speaker 2: Fourteenth, at nine pm. I'm doing a comedy show at
Speaker 2: the nerd Mouth Theater. It's an evening with Chris Fairbanks.
Speaker 4: And I'm actually across the street at toy I'm doing
Speaker 4: an hour an hour comedy.
Speaker 2: You're doing You're doing an hour. It gets hour over
Speaker 2: a plate of pad tie.
Speaker 1: You're just cheats very.
Speaker 4: Slowly, going to be there for an hour.
Speaker 3: She's gonna be muttering to herself for an hour while
Speaker 3: she eats dinner.
Speaker 4: If anyone wants to come, how things have changed vangelism
Speaker 4: my life.
Speaker 2: I remember when these noodles weren't so sh Oh, there's
Speaker 2: that twenty four hour fitness there. It is nothing, nothing changes.
Speaker 2: How guys, you won't even look at me.
Speaker 1: Everyone was turned away.
Speaker 4: And that was a little bit of a hike from
Speaker 4: your place too. I ran, oh, look at you.
Speaker 2: I would run from.
Speaker 4: And they didn't even that, and I Chris.
Speaker 2: When I got here, I was like, oh, oh, somebody's
Speaker 2: got to get into shape, and I would run. I
Speaker 2: mean that lasted for not very long, but.
Speaker 1: Yeah, well, could you didn't keep going back to the
Speaker 1: well when it was dry?
Speaker 2: Yes, very healthy. The exercise well yeah, the gay sex.
Speaker 1: Well that wasn't paying off for you.
Speaker 4: No, the bucket, here's the bucket. No dicks, dick.
Speaker 1: One more time.
Speaker 2: But it's a weird way to find out you're not
Speaker 2: gay is that they won't accept you. That's how I
Speaker 2: knew the bricks mug. Okay, okay, I guess I'll just
Speaker 2: stay with my girlfriend at the time, hangs out. Do
Speaker 2: you still hang out with that?
Speaker 4: Yes?
Speaker 1: We talk.
Speaker 4: We talked because you know, I hope we have kids
Speaker 4: of similar age. Oh really, yeah, they had and we
Speaker 4: we we we had we had a at their house.
Speaker 4: Three she just had a third kid. They're all all
Speaker 4: their names start with h A, which is which is?
Speaker 4: And their last name starts with h A. So oh wow,
Speaker 4: And I think maybe I'll have to stop now because
Speaker 4: they're running out of names that aren't you know, and
Speaker 4: then you can't have the fourth one I can't think of, Well,
Speaker 4: I'm Marriott. The first one was was, uh why I
Speaker 4: wonder what Hannah? The second one was Harper, and then
Speaker 4: this last one is Haley.
Speaker 2: Oh wow, Okay, that seems you know, when you're young
Speaker 2: and people have kids and even though they aren't twins,
Speaker 2: they have a name thing, and they all wear matching
Speaker 2: like ships like rugby shirts, but they aren't twins.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I don't know. That's hard to keep up. I
Speaker 4: couldn't keep it up, you know what I mean. And
Speaker 4: I'm only having one kid, so I could pretend I'm
Speaker 4: I'm going to name all of my children.
Speaker 2: They're going to be any I want. I'm a big
Speaker 2: fan of if your kids says, hey, I want to
Speaker 2: dress like Superman all week and start calling me Scott.
Speaker 2: You just do that?
Speaker 1: No? Yeah? Why not?
Speaker 2: Yeah? My I told my parents I want to be
Speaker 2: Scott and they called me Scott for months and months.
Speaker 4: That is awesome.
Speaker 2: And I and then.
Speaker 4: I named dys morphia. Yeah, I was very serious, you
Speaker 4: know what.
Speaker 2: I don't want to They got better. Wait. I just
Speaker 2: wanted to be Scott because some kid at my daycare
Speaker 2: he had like these blue and yellow Adidas shoes and
Speaker 2: I his name was Scott, and I was like, I
Speaker 2: want to be Scott. I like the name Scott to
Speaker 2: this day. I kind of like Scott. So my dad's like,
Speaker 2: all right, call you Scott. And then after a while
Speaker 2: I really got sick of it, and I wanted to
Speaker 2: be Chris again.
Speaker 4: I don't know what.
Speaker 2: They kept calling me Scott and.
Speaker 1: Then they started hitting you in the face.
Speaker 2: Yeah, a lot of choking. Yeah, dad had long fingers.
Speaker 4: He used to do. Yeah, he used to really do
Speaker 4: like a character on Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, our friend and so we called.
Speaker 4: Him he's very funny, very and I'm not. Yeah, he's
Speaker 4: currently funny. Never stopped them stand up, very very funny.
Speaker 2: And then one and then once time I think it
Speaker 2: was didn't Brandan put him up to it? Where were
Speaker 2: suspenders and he'd like pull on.
Speaker 4: Him and he really sounds like yeah yeah, but he.
Speaker 2: Was yeah yeah.
Speaker 4: Oh has he done? Has Brendan Walshed done the podcast?
Speaker 2: Yes, he has been on. He has been on.
Speaker 1: He just did it recently.
Speaker 4: Yeah. Nice.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he was in a great mood.
Speaker 4: Good, I'm glad.
Speaker 2: What is this place that used to be? Wait a minute, what.
Speaker 4: Did that used to be?
Speaker 2: The Silver Spoon or that, It doesn't matter, We're just yeah,
Speaker 2: I like that place.
Speaker 4: See you're the one doing it. Oh man, you're the
Speaker 4: one muttering toy on tie and I'll do your fucking hour.
Speaker 2: I remember when this pack tie it wasn't so goddamn salty.
Speaker 4: No, that isn't that the Silver Spoon? Connie and Ted's
Speaker 4: and this you're right, yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you're right, Well, okay location, yes.
Speaker 3: They also were they were closing the French market.
Speaker 1: People like this should be murdered.
Speaker 3: Someone that just rolls into the left lane, Like what
Speaker 3: am I doing over here?
Speaker 2: What is Conye and teds? Why does it look like?
Speaker 1: That was the Silver Spin they renamed it.
Speaker 4: I think it's supposed to be good. I remember Alex
Speaker 4: and I'm meaning to go there and never having gone there.
Speaker 2: I like Silver Spoon. I like things the way they were.
Speaker 4: I'm sorry, that's all right, it's all right. We're nearing.
Speaker 4: We're nearing my hotel. I'm on Melrose in Fairfax. Hello,
Speaker 4: right on fair Fa my hotel. Actually, if you ever
Speaker 4: went to the Heart and Hunter, don't the restaurant. It's
Speaker 4: that is where the hotel is. Although the Heart and
Speaker 4: Hunter changed chefs, and the chefs from Heart and the
Speaker 4: Hunter now are at a place on Satel. I can't
Speaker 4: remember the name. It's some funny name.
Speaker 2: Michelle is more of a foodie person. Oh no, she
Speaker 2: goes like fancy restaurants. I don't ever you know about
Speaker 2: all the restaurants in town. I never know about any
Speaker 2: of them.
Speaker 4: You know, and then I just yeah, I like going
Speaker 4: to different restaurants.
Speaker 2: Yeah, goddamn, I'm going to have.
Speaker 4: My show and Echo Park tonight, and I'm like, where
Speaker 4: should I go over there?
Speaker 2: Oh, like they have that big part of your evening. Yeah,
Speaker 2: I'm always on the way out, hovered over the sink.
Speaker 4: Eating lived here, I would, Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2: It is if you're visiting somewhere, you're right. Yeah, when
Speaker 2: I was in Philly, I was like, where should I
Speaker 2: eat tonight? And exactly, of course, I forget what it's
Speaker 2: like to be in a in a new town.
Speaker 4: It was nice when you came to Philly. It wasn't
Speaker 4: have my friends in Philly because you know, I didn't
Speaker 4: really know anybody.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, that's that she hasn't Jim.
Speaker 4: Jim, I know.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 4: Cost of living in Philly much low, way lower. Yeah.
Speaker 4: For we have like just a row house condo that's
Speaker 4: like three bedrooms, two and a half bath, finished basement
Speaker 4: one for less than we were paid. You know how
Speaker 4: much it is. Yeah, it's twenty two I can actually
Speaker 4: be twenty one fifty.
Speaker 2: It got some break Yeah you're kidding.
Speaker 4: No, I'm not kidding. And it's right in the city.
Speaker 2: It's like you lived in Feelings beautiful.
Speaker 4: It's like it's that it's a great walkable neighborhood. It's amazing.
Speaker 4: I'm going right, oh on fair facts, I mean a
Speaker 4: mel Rose. Yes, you're going right. Although I think you can,
Speaker 4: I can't remember. It might actually be.
Speaker 2: One thing I noticed about Philly is the people that
Speaker 2: live there do not like my voice or the things
Speaker 2: I said.
Speaker 4: I was just not I think you need to go
Speaker 4: back and try to time.
Speaker 2: Oh I'm afraid. Uh yeah, I have my opinions about it,
Speaker 2: but you you.
Speaker 4: But you know what, though I haven't headlined there, you
Speaker 4: know what I mean, it may be you know.
Speaker 2: So yeah, I guess that makes a difference.
Speaker 4: You know, Yeah, it does make a difference. Yeah. So
Speaker 4: I can't really I can't. I don't think you should. Yeah,
Speaker 4: it's this. It's this like ground building. If you take
Speaker 4: a left on this street on Hayworth, it's that building
Speaker 4: on the corner. There is a really nice place.
Speaker 2: It looks like a hostel or used to be.
Speaker 4: At That's why in all the rooms kind of look
Speaker 4: like regular bedrooms. Wow, it's really cool and it's not
Speaker 4: it's kind of I mean, it's not like cheap, but
Speaker 4: I mean it's not it's reasonable compared to other places
Speaker 4: that aren't es Central.
Speaker 1: And yeah, it's right.
Speaker 4: Here because I don't runt a car here anymore because
Speaker 4: I just use Uber, you know, and walk.
Speaker 2: It's changed the game that Uber.
Speaker 4: Oh yes, big time, big time. So what happens now?
Speaker 4: Is there like some sort of ritual.
Speaker 2: You get the song? Yes, we have a bit of
Speaker 2: a ritual. I mean you can predict what it might be,
Speaker 2: but we I love that you knew that there would
Speaker 2: be one.
Speaker 4: Oh my god.
Speaker 3: Okay, so but wait, before we started, you have to
Speaker 3: tell us if like, what your shows are this week,
Speaker 3: if people want to go.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, yeah. So if it's tonight, I'm doing the
Speaker 4: Business at nine o'clock and Little Joy Jim Hamilton's comedy Establishment.
Speaker 4: Tomorrow night, I'm doing put your Hands Together, you see,
Speaker 4: be on Franklin. I have to establish what you see
Speaker 4: beer talking about? You see to be Franklin's at eight, Yes,
Speaker 4: and then I'm going to be jetting on over to
Speaker 4: to sleep away camp at the Downtown Independence.
Speaker 2: That's a fun thing.
Speaker 4: Oh is it? Okay? Good?
Speaker 1: Because and then those boys are very nice?
Speaker 4: Oh good, I'm like, yeah, there's so many new shows
Speaker 4: it's crazy, and I was just like, what else can
Speaker 4: I do? And then Wednesday and how many plans I
Speaker 4: was gonna hang out? And Thursday I'm doing Big Money,
Speaker 4: which I always do what I'm in town. I love it.
Speaker 4: And then I'm doing Little Joy at Jim Hamilton's Comedy Establishment,
Speaker 4: booked by Jim Hamilton.
Speaker 2: Yeah, those are all the funest shows. You're gonna have
Speaker 2: a great time.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm super excited.
Speaker 2: That'll be great.
Speaker 4: And I wish I could go to your hour tomorrow night.
Speaker 4: I cannot.
Speaker 2: It's quite all right, And Karen, I like a room
Speaker 2: full strength.
Speaker 4: Sorry, we can't see each other every night, Michelle.
Speaker 3: What you don't know is I'm going to see you.
Speaker 3: This is where I reveal and it gets super weird.
Speaker 1: Hi, I get to see you again.
Speaker 2: I told you i'd be here.
Speaker 4: It weird.
Speaker 2: I'll just we'll talk after you. We'll talk after I.
Speaker 3: Honestly feel like that is the one thing like when
Speaker 3: people show up to see me, like at first you're like, oh, neat, yeah,
Speaker 3: and then it turns into this awful like because it's like, oh, well,
Speaker 3: if you don't do well, that's one thing. Yeah, or
Speaker 3: if you do or blah blah blah, No, it's gonna
Speaker 3: talk to them after whatever. It always makes me want
Speaker 3: to run.
Speaker 4: It's hard, like I have to like sort of like
Speaker 4: it's like you have to force it. This thing you
Speaker 4: have to put on, this sort of like conversational thing.
Speaker 4: I have to do that a lot in Philly and
Speaker 4: a lot when I'm in other cities, you know, Like
Speaker 4: I was in Minnesota doing a lot of stand up
Speaker 4: and it's just it's exhausting.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and it's different than it just being a fan
Speaker 2: of com I like when a fan comes and they're like,
Speaker 2: can I talk to you after? Sure? But even that's
Speaker 2: a cousin, my cousins. Yeah, I got so nervous because
Speaker 2: I haven't seen these kids. I mean one of them
Speaker 2: I hadn't seen since he was fourteen. Wow. I was
Speaker 2: so nervous. But then once you're on stage, it all
Speaker 2: makes sense.
Speaker 1: No.
Speaker 4: And I I did stand up in Minnesota, and I
Speaker 4: headlined this small which is really fun and I made
Speaker 4: a ton of money actually, and uh, in Minneapolis, the
Speaker 4: Comedy Corner Underground is great club. But every so that
Speaker 4: is basically where all my family lives. I went to
Speaker 4: high school about in Wisconsin, about an hour and a
Speaker 4: half away. I had aunts, uncles, cousins, my sisters, my nephew,
Speaker 4: my people I went to high school with, people I
Speaker 4: went to college with. They were sold out shows, so
Speaker 4: thank god. But it was like it was insane because
Speaker 4: I was like, please don't talk to me on on stage.
Speaker 4: Please don't.
Speaker 2: You don't understand that is what they do.
Speaker 4: You don't get how this works. And it and it
Speaker 4: it went pretty well. I mean I I did well,
Speaker 4: but people did interact at certain points, but I handled it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's and then you have to go those are
Speaker 2: my friends that are heckling me right now. These are
Speaker 2: the people that didn't pay to get in. And then
Speaker 2: they're like, hey, he's talking about us. We're helping him.
Speaker 2: I could not be smart.
Speaker 1: Aren't they usually drunk? Oh yeah, like a party night.
Speaker 1: And then it's like yeah, you're basically their dancing monkey.
Speaker 4: No, and it's just like, oh, I'm going to heckle you.
Speaker 4: Do you have no idy? When you say that, it's
Speaker 4: like you're you're telling me like you're fucking ugly. Like
Speaker 4: I don't want to hear. I don't want to have
Speaker 4: to explain comedy to you right now.
Speaker 2: You know I'm gonna heckle you. Oh I'm so mad
Speaker 2: at your family.
Speaker 1: Oh my god.
Speaker 4: But they were very good. They're well behaved, and.
Speaker 2: I'm not mad at them.
Speaker 4: Yes, they were good. They're like fifteen minutes of my set.
Speaker 4: My set right now is making fun of my twin
Speaker 4: sister and the fact that she is such a good
Speaker 4: sport during it makes her pretty terrific.
Speaker 2: Oh that's great.
Speaker 4: Yeah, Sarah, she's good. She's good. She's visiting me at
Speaker 4: Philly at the end of this month.
Speaker 2: Well, we're at your pretentious fucking hipster Yeah that I
Speaker 2: thought you weren't going to reveal that time. Why don't
Speaker 2: you go in and tell the guy you like his
Speaker 2: stalin haircut?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Take that. Yeah, I'd like to end it with some jabs.
Speaker 2: But it's good to have you. Thank you for finally
Speaker 2: being on our phae.
Speaker 1: Yes, thank you.
Speaker 4: I'm happy to have done it. And hey, look I
Speaker 4: got a ride from That's the great part, the fact
Speaker 4: that you're doing this your heroes.
Speaker 1: Thank you. We feel pretty hard.
Speaker 4: What do I do? Throw the mic at one of you?
Speaker 2: That's usually how we end it. We just like to
Speaker 2: have you in anger throw the mic but before.
Speaker 1: You do, we're going to do our signal.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Well, thank you Michelle for being on Do you Need
Speaker 2: a Ride You've been listening to Do you Need a Ride?
Speaker 2: D y n a r