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Speaker 1: The Nicki Gliser Podcast. Glaser, Hello, welcome to the podcast.

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Speaker 1: It's a Nicky Glazer podcast. It's Nicki Glazer in Saint

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Speaker 1: Louis in studio again. Not alone this time. I've been

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Speaker 1: alone for so for so long in my life. But

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Speaker 1: I'm here with my friend Taylor McGraw, who's been on

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Speaker 1: the show a million times before. Welcome to the show. Tayler,

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Speaker 1: you look so young. What's going on with you? What

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Speaker 1: treatments have you been doing? Brian Frangie's also here, Brian,

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Speaker 1: what's up?

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Speaker 2: Yo?

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Speaker 1: Look in the same age as always.

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Speaker 3: I know Brian's treatments.

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Speaker 1: Does have amazing skin. If you see his face, skin

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Speaker 1: is ridict It's really good. But you haven't been doing

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Speaker 1: any treatments? Is it?

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Speaker 3: The haircut?

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Speaker 1: I'm not getting like a bot like a shorter haircut

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Speaker 1: because I think it makes you look younger.

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Speaker 3: Yeah. I like to hear like this.

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Speaker 1: Really mm hmmm. Well, there's this Netflix documentary about a

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Speaker 1: cult called Dancing in the Dark and this girl joins

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Speaker 1: a cult, this dancing cult on TikTok and she cuts

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Speaker 1: her hair and if you've seen it, you know exactly

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Speaker 1: what we're talking about. When she cut her hair. It

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Speaker 1: was just a good choice. She just looked so cute.

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Speaker 1: And usually when girls cut their hair, it's no bueno.

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Speaker 1: Like when the shorter you go, the more like, less

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Speaker 1: feminine you get. And that's just by society's standards, and

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Speaker 1: I'm trying to adhere to society's standards.

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Speaker 3: I'm going to do my career. All Anya's haircuts are perfect.

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Speaker 1: Everyone, Yeah, they're always scuts. She is just of someone

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Speaker 1: who pays attention like she doesn't never does anything wrong

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Speaker 1: in terms of esthetics. She's very thoughtful. Her outfits are

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Speaker 1: well put together, so are yours, though, I mean, that's

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Speaker 1: maybe why you like it. It was my birthday this weekend.

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Speaker 1: Taylor was not there. She was at a funeral that

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Speaker 1: was pre scheduled for someone who died in January, which

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Speaker 1: I don't really understand, but that's fine. Where are you

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Speaker 1: were in Kansas?

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Speaker 3: The middle of Kansas, Okay?

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Speaker 1: And how was that?

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Speaker 3: It was cool? It wasn't too different than here. It's

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Speaker 3: where my boyfriend is from, Central Kansas, eight hours from here,

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Speaker 3: so I thought it was going to be kind of scary,

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Speaker 3: but so long.

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Speaker 1: Eight hours is far.

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Speaker 3: It is kind of far.

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Speaker 1: Six hours is to since that up to drive, but

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Speaker 1: you broke up to drive.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, we broke up during it.

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Speaker 1: That's good.

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Speaker 3: We broke the drive by stopping.

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Speaker 1: That's an interesting I missed it.

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Speaker 2: So they died in January and the funerals.

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Speaker 3: Because that's when everyone can get together, Like there's like

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Speaker 3: a bunch of grandchildren in college and stuff. So they

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Speaker 3: all had to wait till they were able to get

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Speaker 3: because it's hard to get to the middle of Kansas.

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Speaker 2: No one lives there anymore.

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Speaker 3: But she just she was cremated and they like lowered

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Speaker 3: the little ashes down and I wouldn't see it. Actually,

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Speaker 3: we left and the ashes were still sitting there and

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Speaker 3: we drove away, and I was like, what if someone

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Speaker 3: comes and steals this marble urn?

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Speaker 1: Only you would think of that.

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Speaker 3: You would steal that marble urn, would at least open it.

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Speaker 1: My aunt used to steal flowers from grapesite.

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Speaker 3: I did too, well, not from grave sites, but just

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Speaker 3: like from the cemetery you go like cut branches.

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Speaker 1: Oh, she would steal them from the gravesites. She's like, who,

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Speaker 1: they don't be school, So I hope people are stealing

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Speaker 1: them from hers.

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Speaker 3: Well, because I would I would go get them, you know,

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Speaker 3: how they have a sign that says like they're going to.

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Speaker 1: Be thrown away later I.

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Speaker 3: Get them, lin, I go get them on that date.

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Speaker 3: Oh date they say they're going to throw them away.

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Speaker 1: Oh they say they're gonna oh okay.

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Speaker 3: Sign because they they want them refreshed.

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Speaker 2: God like getting the roll in the back of a

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Speaker 2: bagel store when they're at the end of the day.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I can't believe things aren't marked down. But I

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Speaker 1: go into Whole Foods and I go to the sushi department,

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Speaker 1: and I'm like, none of this is lasting until tomorrow.

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Speaker 1: You're closing in a half hour and all of this

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Speaker 1: is still fourteen dollars.

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Speaker 3: What do they do with it? I hope they give

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Speaker 3: you a food, but of.

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Speaker 1: Course they don't. They don't none of it they it goes,

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Speaker 1: all goes in the trash. And then I think the

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Speaker 1: dumpsters are like locked up. I mean, like they don't

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Speaker 1: want people because everyone would go.

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Speaker 3: Because it's all how is the dumpster big enough?

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Speaker 1: Not everyone? I mean like me, you all, all of

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Speaker 1: us would get lots of people like you would go,

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Speaker 1: but I yeah, it's it's disgusting if anyone Busty's listening

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Speaker 1: in the foods. I don't even tell me what happens

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Speaker 1: with waste. I can't even I can't. My psyche can't

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Speaker 1: take it.

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Speaker 3: I got their own coffee and she was like, I'll

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Speaker 3: remake it, and I was like no, no, and she

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Speaker 3: was like insisting.

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Speaker 1: I was like, is that gonna go to someone else?

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Speaker 1: And sometimes they run out of at Starbucks, they run

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Speaker 1: out of the warmer, the hand warmer things, you know,

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Speaker 1: like the cardboard things, and they'll double cop it, and

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Speaker 1: I go no, because I get extra hot. I definitely

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Speaker 1: needed my hands start, but I guess I gotta get

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Speaker 1: callouses on my hand so I don't need them because

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Speaker 1: my throat is now callous. And I can suck down

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Speaker 1: an extra hot like lat that would burn someone's like

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Speaker 1: just smelling it would burn their the inside of their nostril,

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Speaker 1: and I suck it down like nothing.

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Speaker 3: Woo. Why do you want to extra hot?

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Speaker 1: Because I want to slow my consumption down because if

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Speaker 1: it is just regular hot, I'll drink it in literally,

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Speaker 1: I'll drink a ventie in a minute. I'm just a chugger.

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Speaker 1: My dad has always called me one. I'm just I

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Speaker 1: consume things so quickly. I'm just quick and so when

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Speaker 1: it's extra hot, it slows me a little bit, but

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Speaker 1: it's got to be. And then sometimes the coffee is

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Speaker 1: burnt because I get it so hot.

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Speaker 3: Good coffee that doesn't taste as good or something because

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Speaker 3: it's not as suckle.

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Speaker 1: Well that's not fun.

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Speaker 3: Well it could just it could be good. It just not.

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Speaker 3: I mean, this is addictive substance, isn't it.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, It's like I know, it doesn't matter. I'll find

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Speaker 1: a way to love it, like I used to. I

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Speaker 1: was telling my sister yesterday we got Starbucks, and I

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Speaker 1: used to put like eight splenda, this is like two thousand,

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Speaker 1: how many do you put six? I was such an

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Speaker 1: anorexic and I would just go and I would have

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Speaker 1: like my one latte a day, and that would be

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Speaker 1: like I'll be all I ate for the day, you know,

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Speaker 1: until it was like witching hour, and then I would

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Speaker 1: eat all night. But like I would just have one

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Speaker 1: or like two mistos because it's the cheaper version of

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Speaker 1: a latte. It's half coffee, half milk, and it's probably

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Speaker 1: a dollar fifty cheaper, and so I would get that,

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Speaker 1: and I mean that these prices back then, it was

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Speaker 1: probably like two eighty for a venty and then I

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Speaker 1: would get I would put in. It started out with

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Speaker 1: like two Splenda, and then it just your tolerance goes down.

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Speaker 1: And I was doing like I would have to like

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Speaker 1: hide it and like take do four at the bar.

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Speaker 1: And then if someone saw me take four extra and

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Speaker 1: like save them, it was insane and and it would

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Speaker 1: never stop. It would just be like, Okay, then I'm

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Speaker 1: just gonna be just snorting Splendor eventually, and so I

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Speaker 1: had to back down and now I'm at now I

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Speaker 1: just have one Stevia. No Splender is like super low aspartame,

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Speaker 1: and then Stevia is bad. Yes, Splenda is bad. That

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Speaker 1: sweete from this, I know. We were just talking about

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Speaker 1: like how you are what you eat, and how I

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Speaker 1: feel like I'm just so dry, like I I need

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Speaker 1: to eat more fats, but I'm just so it's so

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Speaker 1: ingrained in me that fat is bad because of the

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Speaker 1: nineties brainwashing for diet culture that I just when I

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Speaker 1: see too much fat in something, I just am too.

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Speaker 3: If you're just eating an actual avocado, I literally think.

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Speaker 1: The thing that okay, Like if it's guacam only and

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Speaker 1: I look at the thing and it's about I literally

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Speaker 1: think there will be guacam only on my thighs, Like

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Speaker 1: it will be like the guacamole will go into my

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Speaker 1: thigh and it will be the texture of it because

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Speaker 1: it's like fat. It's just so it's so only cottage cheese.

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Speaker 1: But I know, I love cottage so much, a miss.

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Speaker 3: But I think, yeah, that you that it will add

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Speaker 3: to a lump layer on my thought.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, but it's she's just fatter than you'd think. I

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Speaker 2: realized that the other day too. What the fuck? I

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Speaker 2: thought it was healthy.

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Speaker 1: You can get zero, but it is healthy because fat

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Speaker 1: is healthy. But it's you can get zero. You can

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Speaker 1: get non fat cottage cheese. And then that has like

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Speaker 1: a lot of sugar and just bullshit.

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Speaker 3: And it bullshit. Yeah, sugar is what makes you.

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Speaker 1: I'm drinking coconut water right now. But it's like has

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Speaker 1: kind of pulp in it, which I love. I love pulp.

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Speaker 1: It's so good. I got a Trader Joe's. Let's see

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Speaker 1: how much fat eight percent of my six grams of fat.

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Speaker 1: That's pretty good. Saturated fat six grams saturate is the

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Speaker 1: one that you don't want, right.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, you do want you don't want trans fat?

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, saturated fat's bad too, but yeah, saturated no.

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Speaker 3: No, no, that's nineties, that's nineties.

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Speaker 2: Really, Yes, saturated fat leads to heart disease.

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Speaker 3: Incorrect.

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Speaker 1: All right, Well, thankfully we don't have anyone to fact check,

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Speaker 1: so we'll just leave that there for someone else to

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Speaker 1: dm us later. But yeah, that's I'm gonna try to

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Speaker 1: because I want to be more supple and I want

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Speaker 1: to like look not so dry and husky.

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Speaker 3: Yeah I'm a husk too, because I.

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Speaker 1: Feel like you are what you eat. And like, if

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Speaker 1: I'm eating rice cakes, I'm gonna look like a rice

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Speaker 1: cake and I'm getting my hair is going to break

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Speaker 1: off like rice cake.

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Speaker 3: You're eating avocado, then you'll be like creamy and like salamahayak.

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Speaker 1: I just want to look like I bet she eats

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Speaker 1: a lot of avocados. Yeah, but you ever watch those

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Speaker 1: things of like what No, you don't because you don't

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Speaker 1: have a phone, but like what I eat in a

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Speaker 1: day and like these influencers, Yeah, and I just don't

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Speaker 1: buy it. And also it seems like I just I

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Speaker 1: get I like to eat a lot, so I get

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Speaker 1: sad if it's just a small little portion of toast

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Speaker 1: with avocado and then I'm like, I want more food

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Speaker 1: than that, Like that's done. And because I eat so fast,

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Speaker 1: I need meals to take a long time, so I

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Speaker 1: need like a big salad because then I'm done with

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Speaker 1: my toast and I'm like, that's it, and I like

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Speaker 1: my stomach isn't full yet because I ate it too fast,

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Speaker 1: so I just want more.

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Speaker 3: Put avocado in the salad and then put like a

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Speaker 3: really fatty dressing.

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Speaker 1: I hate avocado in a salad like I just hate

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Speaker 1: the consistency of avocado on its own.

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Speaker 3: You make it like and you blend, like make a

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Speaker 3: dressing like a Green Goddess dressing, which can be vegan.

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Speaker 1: But then I have to cook, and that's just stressing

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Speaker 1: me out because there's like dirty bowls, and Chris has

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Speaker 1: a way that he washes certain bowls, and I don't

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Speaker 1: really understand the he He does the dish washer like

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Speaker 1: three times a day he's washing dishes, so I don't understand.

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Speaker 3: I don't eat oatmeal.

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Speaker 1: I would never dishwash if I did. I just don't.

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Speaker 1: I would never even.

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Speaker 3: Know, especially like oatmeal which is gooey and like sticks

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Speaker 3: to the edge. I don't know how you do it.

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Speaker 1: Oh, I know how to do it. You just fill

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Speaker 1: the bowl up with water and then you scrape it out,

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Speaker 1: you like brush it off with the soapy fingsh thing,

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Speaker 1: the brush thing, and then you just put in another bowl.

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Speaker 1: Like I don't care if there's residue because it was mine.

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Speaker 1: If it was like someone else's bowl, yeah, I might

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Speaker 1: like rush brush it really hard and wipe it. But

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Speaker 1: if it's me and there's still residue, just more me.

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Speaker 1: But I but bacteria isn't there. And we've talked about

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Speaker 1: this million times. I want to get into my birthday

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Speaker 1: gifts that I got the weekend at my birthday. I

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Speaker 1: have a box of a bag of them. They all

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Speaker 1: fit in a bag.

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Speaker 3: If you're not opened them yet, they're oh, I'm.

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Speaker 1: Just consolidated them and I wanted to go through them.

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Speaker 1: I got Kirsten recycled a birthday card from I gave

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Speaker 1: her this when she was turning fourteen, and I don't

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Speaker 1: know what we don't really get. These are a lot

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Speaker 1: of inside jokes in here. But she gave me back

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Speaker 1: a card I gave her when she was fourteen that

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Speaker 1: said the judge, the jury, and the prosecution are ready.

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Speaker 1: And it says like a courtroom you are sentenced to

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Speaker 1: a fourteenth year of life. And then there's a guy

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Speaker 1: that someone's dad I felt Trad, Yeah, Trad's dad used

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Speaker 1: to a guy that we swam at our pool with

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Speaker 1: was like he was a lawyer and he would prosecute you.

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Speaker 1: And we were always making fun of him for being

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Speaker 1: like he is a Southern loyal who will prosecute.

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Speaker 3: Because we made fun of his son, and he said he.

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Speaker 1: Will persecute, persecute, Ya's persecute, but we were prosecute. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: and we might. I don't even know that he ever

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Speaker 1: said it, but we just gave him that character. And

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Speaker 1: then we were also we made fun of some girl

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Speaker 1: in high school that she was a mistake. We thought

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Speaker 1: that was funny. And so it has him saying the

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Speaker 1: stikes are rosin and we need seventeen identical mistikes. I

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Speaker 1: don't know what that's about. And then I drew a

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Speaker 1: bunch of these girls that were a mistake. We were

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Speaker 1: again we were bullies in quiet like we would talk.

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Speaker 1: We had never seen it was observing, Yes, that these

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Speaker 1: that girl was probably a mistake.

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Speaker 3: We're analysts, yeah, like she came from she was very analyzing.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, she had like fluffy bangs, like kind of eighties

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Speaker 1: bangs left over. I don't even know who it was.

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Speaker 1: I literally don't. And then there are two Siamese cats

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Speaker 1: you remember in the Risk of Cats were psychees, we

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Speaker 1: are saying, and they're sexy cats, and they're like, oh,

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Speaker 1: even a sneaking baby bunker, and they wanted to eat

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Speaker 1: the cat, and they wanted to drink the They wanted

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Speaker 1: to eat the baby or like drink the baby's milk.

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Speaker 3: So they wanted to get the baby out because they

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Speaker 3: used to be the joy of the family and then

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Speaker 3: the baby came, so they.

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Speaker 1: And so I wrote two cats that their tails are

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Speaker 1: like entwined and says we will get in baby bunkie,

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Speaker 1: sneak into womb plenty jelly for me and some for whom.

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Speaker 1: And then there's I drew Adam Sandler and he has

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Speaker 1: a yamaca on it says, get on your hanukkah, it's

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Speaker 1: time for yamica. I don't know, okay. And then I

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Speaker 1: had another guy that was a cool guy and he's

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Speaker 1: in a room and he has jinkos on in air

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Speaker 1: walks and I know their airwalks because I drew an

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Speaker 1: arrow arrow that says airwalks, and there's a lava lamp

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Speaker 1: and a poster that has pot on it. It just

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Speaker 1: says pot and a leaf and then a black light

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Speaker 1: that I wrote black light next to and a three

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Speaker 1: to eleven poster and camel cigarettes and he says, h

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Speaker 1: on my birthday, I get cussed stuff like guns and roses,

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Speaker 1: T shirts and cool video games like Street Fighter. And

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Speaker 1: then we made fun of these girls. I don't even

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Speaker 1: want to say what their names are. I don't remember

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Speaker 1: who they are, but blah blah blah twins, like and

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Speaker 1: it's their last name, and I said, the blah blah

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Speaker 1: blah twins. And then it's two girls in Lisa Frank

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Speaker 1: shirts and they say how much is that doggy in

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Speaker 1: the window? T tih? And then there was another girl.

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Speaker 1: There's another guy and this is I can't even I

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Speaker 1: can't read that one. It's it's it's too much. I can't.

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Speaker 1: It's like a slightly racist I think, I don't even know,

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Speaker 1: like it's not it's not good. But anyway, she just

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Speaker 1: she just gave me back this card and just wrote

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Speaker 1: I love you Nikki on it, so.

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Speaker 3: She didn't she didn't copy it she gave it back.

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Speaker 1: She just gave it back to me and instead of fourteenth,

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Speaker 1: I wrote fortieth.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, let me see it.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, look at the back is a lack a her wrath,

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Speaker 1: you know, you know what it is? Okay. So, and

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Speaker 1: then my niece Poppy, I've been like negotiating with her

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Speaker 1: to get more toys, you know, in cards from her,

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Speaker 1: and she dictated to my sister what to write, and

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Speaker 1: this is so poetic. The cover of it says, I

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Speaker 1: wish you were here okay she's four five, and then

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Speaker 1: on the inside it says, happy birthday, Nikki, thank you

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Speaker 1: for all the toys I she were here for every

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Speaker 1: day and every season. Ah, so beautiful. My dad was like,

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Speaker 1: she got that from Taylor Swift, and I'm like, I

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Speaker 1: don't think so, dude, I don't even know what that is.

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Speaker 3: She got it from, like the birds.

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Speaker 1: My sister gave me. My sister also she got me

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Speaker 1: a Taylor Swift sweatshirt that Taylor Swift was a KU

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Speaker 1: sweatshirt that Taylor Swift was wearing in a video that

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00:14:21,400 --> 00:14:23,920
Speaker 1: she posted and it's back ordered, so she just drew

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Speaker 1: a picture of it. My sister also drew a picture

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Speaker 1: of Taylor Swift and put it on the bag. Isn't

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Speaker 1: that beautiful cut? And the eyes were so hard to

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Speaker 1: do that she erased them so many times that they

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Speaker 1: went through the paper and she had to cut out eyes,

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Speaker 1: make eyes separately and paste them on, soay, she had commit.

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Speaker 1: And then I got a Taylor Swift golden book, you know,

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Speaker 1: like for little kids. That's from my dad's friend Steve.

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Speaker 1: That was really nice. Thank you Steve Schmidt. He's a

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Speaker 1: jazz musician in Cincinnati. And then I got uh. And

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Speaker 1: then Chris got me Taylor's with Sweatpants, which I already

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Speaker 1: got because I was like, Chris, look what I got

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00:15:03,680 --> 00:15:07,720
Speaker 1: sweatpants Torture Poets and he was like, oh god, and

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00:15:07,760 --> 00:15:09,400
Speaker 1: I go did you get these? And he was like yeah,

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00:15:09,480 --> 00:15:11,440
Speaker 1: and I was like that's okay, I want to. So

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00:15:11,520 --> 00:15:14,360
Speaker 1: we got me Taylor's with Sweat Sweatpants, and I now

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Speaker 1: have the Tortured Poet's ear rings, the bracelet, two rings

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Speaker 1: because my parents got me a ring and I got

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Speaker 1: myself a ring. But Swift, no, they're just like it's

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Speaker 1: like for the album, it's like a Torture Poets ring

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Speaker 1: and then the album's called Torture Poets Department, and then

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Speaker 1: Chris got me the Torture Poet's necklace, which I don't

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00:15:34,360 --> 00:15:35,960
Speaker 1: even know how he got because that thing has been

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Speaker 1: on back order and I've been wanting it. So that

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00:15:37,560 --> 00:15:39,600
Speaker 1: was really exciting. And he got me the Torture Poets

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Speaker 1: album and I was very excited about that. My parents, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: they got me the ring. What is in here? Oh yeah,

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00:15:50,240 --> 00:15:53,560
Speaker 1: it's my Holly got me a necklace. She also got

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Speaker 1: me a scavenger hunt. She would she went on, Yeah,

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00:15:59,000 --> 00:16:01,160
Speaker 1: so I had to open a letter and then she

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Speaker 1: would read the letter and then we it would take

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00:16:03,200 --> 00:16:06,040
Speaker 1: us to a destination. So I'll just give an example,

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00:16:06,120 --> 00:16:07,720
Speaker 1: so I'll read the first one. And so we went

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00:16:07,720 --> 00:16:09,600
Speaker 1: to like five different deff We didn't end up going

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Speaker 1: to all of them. We went to three of them.

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Speaker 1: But this is her poem. Today You are so much,

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00:16:16,560 --> 00:16:22,440
Speaker 1: so much Today you are forty and so much lays ahead.

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00:16:22,480 --> 00:16:25,560
Speaker 1: Your career is now soaring. Sorry if this brings you dread,

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00:16:25,800 --> 00:16:28,080
Speaker 1: but so much excitement within these years to come. Think

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00:16:28,120 --> 00:16:30,360
Speaker 1: in twenty years, Taylor may do a Dead Poet's tour.

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Speaker 1: Run Taylor Swift. Sorry, Taylor, we can't see into the

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Speaker 1: future to where this all leads. But since we and

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00:16:36,320 --> 00:16:39,400
Speaker 1: she she's doing a dead poets dead and she said

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00:16:39,440 --> 00:16:42,160
Speaker 1: dead poets, she's doing a torture poets.

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00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:44,040
Speaker 3: Run anyway on this shoh, but who knows.

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Speaker 1: We can't see into the future where this all leads.

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00:16:46,200 --> 00:16:49,240
Speaker 1: But since we can't see forward, can we plead? Can

382
00:16:49,280 --> 00:16:52,200
Speaker 1: we reflect back to days of your please? There is

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00:16:52,240 --> 00:16:54,560
Speaker 1: so much to celebrate in your life, both big and small,

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00:16:54,600 --> 00:16:56,640
Speaker 1: and for a little while, let's look back to connect

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00:16:56,640 --> 00:16:59,640
Speaker 1: some dots for us all. It seems Julie wasn't quite

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00:16:59,640 --> 00:17:02,720
Speaker 1: ready back on June first, nineteen eighty four. Let's get in.

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00:17:03,120 --> 00:17:05,359
Speaker 1: Let's get in one more game of poker before Nicole

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00:17:05,400 --> 00:17:08,720
Speaker 1: Renet takes the floor. Okay, so my mom told us

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Speaker 1: on Friday Night, all my friends that when I was born,

390
00:17:13,480 --> 00:17:15,359
Speaker 1: when I was she was going into labor. She didn't

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00:17:15,480 --> 00:17:17,119
Speaker 1: want she didn't want to be a mom yet, so

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00:17:17,800 --> 00:17:20,639
Speaker 1: she stopped at her brother's house where he was having

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Speaker 1: a poker game and played a couple hands of poker,

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00:17:22,680 --> 00:17:24,600
Speaker 1: and they were like, you need to leave, like you're

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Speaker 1: getting water all over the floor, and so she and

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00:17:29,000 --> 00:17:31,959
Speaker 1: then she also said that when she was in labor,

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Speaker 1: she kept saying she wanted to jump out the window. Okay, okay,

398
00:17:35,920 --> 00:17:38,359
Speaker 1: because she just wasn't ready to be a mom.

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Speaker 3: How old was she She was young twenty.

400
00:17:40,080 --> 00:17:43,239
Speaker 1: Five, But she really explains a lot of I came

401
00:17:43,280 --> 00:17:44,919
Speaker 1: into this world with my mom wanting to jump out

402
00:17:44,920 --> 00:17:47,639
Speaker 1: of the window before, and that's not the true. She

403
00:17:47,680 --> 00:17:49,720
Speaker 1: was very happy that she had me, A small blonde

404
00:17:50,600 --> 00:17:53,120
Speaker 1: with great tits. Could be what the doc could could

405
00:17:53,200 --> 00:17:56,760
Speaker 1: be what the doc said. Nicky has always been a stunner.

406
00:17:56,800 --> 00:17:59,520
Speaker 1: The Glazers were parents for the first time to a daughter.

407
00:18:00,000 --> 00:18:03,040
Speaker 1: Oh this is rhyme. Sorry, moving on a few years

408
00:18:03,119 --> 00:18:10,960
Speaker 1: when when something came? When when a young sister came

409
00:18:11,480 --> 00:18:15,560
Speaker 1: young Lauren Jane two two were The two were friends

410
00:18:15,640 --> 00:18:17,960
Speaker 1: until they were not. And in those moments, boy could

411
00:18:18,000 --> 00:18:20,800
Speaker 1: they rage. Teenage years were rough, They'd tell you, lots

412
00:18:20,800 --> 00:18:23,320
Speaker 1: of screaming and fighting as kids. Though they had built

413
00:18:23,359 --> 00:18:25,600
Speaker 1: in friendships. They had built in friend and each other

414
00:18:25,640 --> 00:18:30,000
Speaker 1: to confide in. Ooh before acne embraces and the Glazers

415
00:18:30,040 --> 00:18:33,600
Speaker 1: were an Ohio breed. Maybe they'd have stayed forever with

416
00:18:33,880 --> 00:18:37,240
Speaker 1: the without with no real plans to leave. But as

417
00:18:37,240 --> 00:18:40,200
Speaker 1: fate would have it, you know, there's no will. That's true,

418
00:18:40,440 --> 00:18:42,680
Speaker 1: that's free. EJ was offered a job in Saint Louis

419
00:18:42,680 --> 00:18:45,760
Speaker 1: with Charter Cable TV, so the family was relocated to

420
00:18:45,760 --> 00:18:47,919
Speaker 1: a city down the river. They moved to Saint Louis.

421
00:18:47,920 --> 00:18:50,680
Speaker 1: Had they been there before? Who knew? Maybe never. Let's

422
00:18:50,760 --> 00:18:53,480
Speaker 1: take a Let's take a jog down memory lane and

423
00:18:53,520 --> 00:18:56,879
Speaker 1: see where all this started, where Nikki became the woman

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00:18:56,920 --> 00:19:00,840
Speaker 1: she is a generous, hilarious starlett Key. Happy birthday with

425
00:19:00,920 --> 00:19:03,040
Speaker 1: an amazing friend. Thank you for gathering us all here

426
00:19:03,040 --> 00:19:06,280
Speaker 1: to celebrate, hang and sing. And then so we went

427
00:19:06,320 --> 00:19:08,639
Speaker 1: to Blaze Avenue, which is where I was. Yeah, and

428
00:19:08,680 --> 00:19:11,120
Speaker 1: then we and then then she read another thing there

429
00:19:11,160 --> 00:19:13,800
Speaker 1: that took us to my elementary school and then high

430
00:19:13,840 --> 00:19:16,919
Speaker 1: school and then the emos where we worked, and it

431
00:19:16,960 --> 00:19:19,760
Speaker 1: was just such Me and Crison worked and there's tons

432
00:19:19,760 --> 00:19:22,119
Speaker 1: of side jokes. No, we didn't go to emos, we

433
00:19:22,119 --> 00:19:25,040
Speaker 1: didn't have time. But we did go to our old

434
00:19:25,119 --> 00:19:26,720
Speaker 1: high school. And I went past the window where they

435
00:19:26,760 --> 00:19:30,040
Speaker 1: would always post like the castings for the plays because

436
00:19:30,040 --> 00:19:31,160
Speaker 1: you would have to go on the weekend. You would

437
00:19:31,160 --> 00:19:33,560
Speaker 1: audition during the week and then on the weekend on Sunday,

438
00:19:33,880 --> 00:19:36,040
Speaker 1: he would finally post the cast list and you would

439
00:19:36,040 --> 00:19:37,560
Speaker 1: go up to the school and look at the window

440
00:19:37,600 --> 00:19:39,199
Speaker 1: to see if you made it, and there were so

441
00:19:39,320 --> 00:19:41,440
Speaker 1: many that window. I cried so many times at that

442
00:19:41,480 --> 00:19:43,520
Speaker 1: window because I just didn't see my name or it

443
00:19:43,560 --> 00:19:46,399
Speaker 1: was just at the very bottom for some you know,

444
00:19:46,480 --> 00:19:51,280
Speaker 1: townsperson role and what else. If my sister worked there

445
00:19:51,359 --> 00:19:54,800
Speaker 1: until this year. So that's uh, she she was working

446
00:19:54,800 --> 00:19:57,200
Speaker 1: there for ten years. And I'm gonna be in the

447
00:19:57,200 --> 00:19:59,840
Speaker 1: Hall of Flame Flame hall of Fame at uh Kirkwood

448
00:19:59,880 --> 00:20:04,960
Speaker 1: Eye School coming up. They're inducting me in February. Yes,

449
00:20:05,040 --> 00:20:07,560
Speaker 1: there's a hall of fame and I all know. But

450
00:20:08,520 --> 00:20:10,679
Speaker 1: it was a huge like I had to like be

451
00:20:10,960 --> 00:20:13,040
Speaker 1: submitted and have to send in all of this stuff,

452
00:20:13,040 --> 00:20:14,360
Speaker 1: and I was kind of like what am I doing?

453
00:20:14,400 --> 00:20:16,639
Speaker 1: Like Halla's dad was our principal and so he was

454
00:20:16,640 --> 00:20:18,560
Speaker 1: the one that spearheaded it and was like, you need

455
00:20:18,600 --> 00:20:19,879
Speaker 1: to send me this and this, and I was like,

456
00:20:20,040 --> 00:20:21,639
Speaker 1: I don't know if I have any of that. What

457
00:20:21,720 --> 00:20:24,560
Speaker 1: volunteer work have you done? I'm like I don't. I've

458
00:20:24,560 --> 00:20:27,760
Speaker 1: made a lot of money for animals. Here's my peda campaign.

459
00:20:27,800 --> 00:20:29,879
Speaker 1: And then he jerked off and then send it in

460
00:20:29,920 --> 00:20:34,359
Speaker 1: and then not gonna eat and say that. But uh yeah,

461
00:20:34,359 --> 00:20:36,040
Speaker 1: so that's all happening. It was a really fun weekend.

462
00:20:36,080 --> 00:20:37,600
Speaker 1: We'll get to more of it when we come back

463
00:20:37,680 --> 00:20:38,359
Speaker 1: after this.

464
00:20:41,119 --> 00:20:42,560
Speaker 2: Who else is in the Hall of Fame.

465
00:20:43,080 --> 00:20:45,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a good question. I mean, I don't he

466
00:20:45,760 --> 00:20:47,840
Speaker 1: Scott Bacula went to my high school.

467
00:20:48,080 --> 00:20:49,040
Speaker 2: What is Scott?

468
00:20:49,760 --> 00:20:51,360
Speaker 3: What is the disease?

469
00:20:51,880 --> 00:20:57,200
Speaker 1: He was? He was the quantum leap. I think you're

470
00:20:57,240 --> 00:20:59,680
Speaker 1: too young. You're too young to know. I was even

471
00:20:59,680 --> 00:21:00,359
Speaker 1: too young at the.

472
00:21:00,359 --> 00:21:02,440
Speaker 3: Time to haughty. My mom was in love with him.

473
00:21:02,520 --> 00:21:04,360
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, she went to high school with him, right.

474
00:21:04,440 --> 00:21:06,600
Speaker 3: Yeah. We have a picture of him at her house.

475
00:21:06,640 --> 00:21:08,680
Speaker 3: He's like really small on a football field. My mom

476
00:21:08,680 --> 00:21:10,800
Speaker 3: took a picture of him because it was such a haughty.

477
00:21:10,920 --> 00:21:15,040
Speaker 1: I think you'll know. Uh Maclin, what's his last name?

478
00:21:15,880 --> 00:21:16,720
Speaker 2: Jeremy Macklin.

479
00:21:16,880 --> 00:21:20,399
Speaker 1: Yeah, Jeremy Macklin. There Roshawn Mackels, wide receiver.

480
00:21:20,480 --> 00:21:21,240
Speaker 2: Jeremy Macklin.

481
00:21:21,600 --> 00:21:25,800
Speaker 1: Yeah, there you go. Wow, Okay, here's here's Scott Bagula

482
00:21:25,800 --> 00:21:29,240
Speaker 1: class in nineteen seventy three. Dylan Brady, he's the member

483
00:21:29,320 --> 00:21:31,639
Speaker 1: of the musical duo one hundred gets. I don't know

484
00:21:31,640 --> 00:21:35,200
Speaker 1: what that college X Colin Donald, which I've talked about before.

485
00:21:35,359 --> 00:21:39,359
Speaker 1: He is in the The Affair on Showtime. He's in

486
00:21:39,480 --> 00:21:43,200
Speaker 1: Chicago grade Colin Donald. Yeah, he was my first date.

487
00:21:43,480 --> 00:21:45,600
Speaker 1: We went to go see the Barnaked Ladies at the

488
00:21:45,640 --> 00:21:48,040
Speaker 1: Keel Center. I didn't know it was a date.

489
00:21:48,400 --> 00:21:49,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, what do you mean?

490
00:21:49,080 --> 00:21:51,680
Speaker 1: But until later and then I was like, oh, I

491
00:21:51,760 --> 00:21:55,240
Speaker 1: think this was a date that you said we did

492
00:21:55,320 --> 00:21:58,439
Speaker 1: play together. Yeah. He was always so good and he

493
00:21:58,520 --> 00:21:58,959
Speaker 1: still is.

494
00:21:59,760 --> 00:22:02,000
Speaker 3: Let's see, he's a real actor now.

495
00:22:02,240 --> 00:22:07,240
Speaker 1: Defensive coordinator for the Washington Huskies football. William Ingey, Kyle Hawkins,

496
00:22:07,280 --> 00:22:11,639
Speaker 1: prominent men's lacrosse team coach and gay rights pioneer. Okay,

497
00:22:11,680 --> 00:22:14,040
Speaker 1: Marcus Harris American football player. Do you know that is

498
00:22:15,080 --> 00:22:18,920
Speaker 1: Jeremy Macklin class of two thousand and six. I can't

499
00:22:18,920 --> 00:22:20,880
Speaker 1: believe you know who Jeremy Macklin is. That's pretty cool.

500
00:22:21,520 --> 00:22:23,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's pretty cool to know who he is.

501
00:22:23,840 --> 00:22:29,000
Speaker 1: There's someone named Slater with three why's, and he's a singer. Wow,

502
00:22:29,160 --> 00:22:31,960
Speaker 1: and he was born in nineteen six, nineteen oh Catherine

503
00:22:32,000 --> 00:22:37,960
Speaker 1: Grace Garner, professionally known as Slator. Hell, yeah, nineteen ninety six. Okay.

504
00:22:37,880 --> 00:22:40,920
Speaker 2: They're leading pretty heavily into athletics in the arts. There's

505
00:22:40,960 --> 00:22:43,439
Speaker 2: not a lot of like I found the cure for

506
00:22:44,040 --> 00:22:48,960
Speaker 2: diabetes two or whatever. I invented a type of car

507
00:22:49,000 --> 00:22:50,600
Speaker 2: part that makes the horsepower go.

508
00:22:51,080 --> 00:22:54,840
Speaker 1: No, it's all NFL players. Oh, David Sanborn class of

509
00:22:54,920 --> 00:22:59,040
Speaker 1: nineteen sixty three Grammy Award winning recording Artists and musician Born.

510
00:22:59,119 --> 00:23:03,479
Speaker 1: It's yeah, there's no no one discovered anything. Yeah, and

511
00:23:03,520 --> 00:23:04,359
Speaker 1: from our school.

512
00:23:04,680 --> 00:23:08,439
Speaker 2: Feels like it feels like they neglected to include people

513
00:23:08,440 --> 00:23:13,359
Speaker 2: who have like achieved things in business or science. Except

514
00:23:13,400 --> 00:23:16,399
Speaker 2: for that one gay rights activist. There's only athletes and

515
00:23:17,119 --> 00:23:17,639
Speaker 2: an artist.

516
00:23:17,720 --> 00:23:19,679
Speaker 1: But with Wikipedia, doesn't don't be a want to like

517
00:23:19,720 --> 00:23:23,520
Speaker 1: submit it, so like no one just knows what you know,

518
00:23:23,600 --> 00:23:25,720
Speaker 1: Discoveries are being made. Someone could have discovered a new

519
00:23:25,840 --> 00:23:28,760
Speaker 1: species of bark and they wouldn't care. No one care.

520
00:23:29,200 --> 00:23:30,679
Speaker 2: Oh this is I thought. This is a hall of

521
00:23:30,680 --> 00:23:32,280
Speaker 2: fame that your school was putting. This is in your

522
00:23:32,280 --> 00:23:33,440
Speaker 2: Wikipedia page.

523
00:23:33,560 --> 00:23:35,440
Speaker 1: That's what Well, I just looked it up. This is it.

524
00:23:35,560 --> 00:23:37,400
Speaker 1: I don't know who's in the hall of Okay, let's

525
00:23:37,400 --> 00:23:40,040
Speaker 1: look at the actual hall of fame, Kirkwood High School

526
00:23:40,119 --> 00:23:40,760
Speaker 1: Hall of Fame.

527
00:23:41,960 --> 00:23:44,520
Speaker 3: That was just notable Kirkwood. Yeah, okay, I.

528
00:23:44,920 --> 00:23:47,399
Speaker 1: Don't think Maclin's in yet, but he should be.

529
00:23:48,160 --> 00:23:50,760
Speaker 3: I was like Slater or is in this hall of fame.

530
00:23:51,400 --> 00:23:55,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, no, there's an athletics Hall of Fame and outstanding alumni. Okay,

531
00:23:55,760 --> 00:23:59,080
Speaker 1: let's see. Oh no, this is about how to submit.

532
00:23:59,160 --> 00:24:01,520
Speaker 1: So it's not even listed anywhere.

533
00:24:01,720 --> 00:24:03,000
Speaker 3: You might be the first one in it.

534
00:24:03,320 --> 00:24:06,080
Speaker 1: No, there's others. There's look at I'm looking at like

535
00:24:06,119 --> 00:24:08,120
Speaker 1: there's been a ceremonies and stuff.

536
00:24:08,440 --> 00:24:10,040
Speaker 3: I oh the ceremony.

537
00:24:10,080 --> 00:24:15,800
Speaker 1: I'm going to coaches athletes. Greg Warren, Hey, yeah, Greg

538
00:24:15,840 --> 00:24:18,680
Speaker 1: Warren went to my high school and it looks like

539
00:24:18,720 --> 00:24:21,080
Speaker 1: he was inducted last year. Okay, so my friend Greg Warren,

540
00:24:21,560 --> 00:24:23,760
Speaker 1: he can set me, you can walk me through the process.

541
00:24:24,080 --> 00:24:29,760
Speaker 1: He is i think eighteen years older than seventeen years older. Yes,

542
00:24:29,880 --> 00:24:33,200
Speaker 1: and he discovered a new type of.

543
00:24:34,040 --> 00:24:36,920
Speaker 2: Atomic un sponge. Yes.

544
00:24:37,080 --> 00:24:39,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, he was doing work in a submarine for a

545
00:24:39,640 --> 00:24:41,280
Speaker 1: while and discovered that. So that's pretty cool.

546
00:24:42,800 --> 00:24:44,159
Speaker 2: Yeah.

547
00:24:44,440 --> 00:24:46,879
Speaker 1: I mean it does feel good though, like to get

548
00:24:46,960 --> 00:24:49,479
Speaker 1: record like that actually meant something to me more than

549
00:24:49,760 --> 00:24:52,120
Speaker 1: most things of like, okay, good my high school, because

550
00:24:52,119 --> 00:24:55,040
Speaker 1: that's what inspires all this. We were talking about Enneagram

551
00:24:55,119 --> 00:24:59,080
Speaker 1: this weekend as we always do, and like my shock

552
00:24:59,160 --> 00:25:01,960
Speaker 1: at how like a is not like most musicians, musicians

553
00:25:02,000 --> 00:25:04,080
Speaker 1: and actors. I'm like, I'm just like, why aren't they

554
00:25:04,119 --> 00:25:08,440
Speaker 1: all threes? Because why would you want to create art

555
00:25:08,720 --> 00:25:11,160
Speaker 1: unless it was to get people to like you? No,

556
00:25:11,600 --> 00:25:14,160
Speaker 1: that's a three mind, I know, but like, what would

557
00:25:14,240 --> 00:25:16,080
Speaker 1: inspire anyone to do it otherwise?

558
00:25:16,240 --> 00:25:17,360
Speaker 2: You express that's.

559
00:25:18,760 --> 00:25:21,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, but okay, okay, Well here's the thing that's no, no, no, no,

560
00:25:22,359 --> 00:25:24,840
Speaker 1: here's I'll poke a hole in it. Then why don't

561
00:25:24,840 --> 00:25:26,800
Speaker 1: you just fucking sing in your room alone? Why do

562
00:25:26,840 --> 00:25:27,679
Speaker 1: you have to disseminate it?

563
00:25:27,720 --> 00:25:30,120
Speaker 2: Why do you kind of has that trait of hers

564
00:25:30,119 --> 00:25:31,919
Speaker 2: because she doesn't really want it. She didn't want to

565
00:25:31,920 --> 00:25:35,680
Speaker 2: break through and achieve sort of commercial success, so she says, so.

566
00:25:35,600 --> 00:25:38,399
Speaker 1: She I put out an album at all for money.

567
00:25:38,600 --> 00:25:39,399
Speaker 1: I mean, this is not.

568
00:25:39,440 --> 00:25:41,920
Speaker 3: Even the main reason. The main reason is because you're

569
00:25:41,920 --> 00:25:44,000
Speaker 3: doing it and then people are telling you it's good

570
00:25:44,040 --> 00:25:46,040
Speaker 3: and then you can make money. But you're not doing

571
00:25:46,040 --> 00:25:47,399
Speaker 3: it specifically to get.

572
00:25:47,359 --> 00:25:50,439
Speaker 1: I understand that now because I don't care about making

573
00:25:50,600 --> 00:25:52,920
Speaker 1: money and people like me anymore. But I think initially

574
00:25:52,960 --> 00:25:56,240
Speaker 1: I don't understand why, like now that I'm having like

575
00:25:56,280 --> 00:25:58,119
Speaker 1: I just had a meeting with a production company yesterday,

576
00:25:58,119 --> 00:25:59,520
Speaker 1: and I wasn't trying to sound cool, but I was like,

577
00:26:00,119 --> 00:26:02,480
Speaker 1: I just don't want to do anything. I don't need

578
00:26:02,480 --> 00:26:03,919
Speaker 1: to do anything. I don't want to stand in a

579
00:26:03,920 --> 00:26:05,720
Speaker 1: trailer all day. I don't want to write scripts that

580
00:26:05,760 --> 00:26:08,960
Speaker 1: I'm not inspired by. I just I don't. The only

581
00:26:09,000 --> 00:26:10,600
Speaker 1: reason I want to do something is if it's fun,

582
00:26:10,960 --> 00:26:13,240
Speaker 1: and it's like, actually is getting a message out there

583
00:26:13,240 --> 00:26:14,920
Speaker 1: that I feel like is good? And I'm like, oh wait,

584
00:26:14,960 --> 00:26:17,000
Speaker 1: maybe I'm like kind of transitioning out of three.

585
00:26:17,280 --> 00:26:19,480
Speaker 3: You're just not focusing on the main three.

586
00:26:19,840 --> 00:26:22,160
Speaker 1: Yeah. Well, Brian always says that you're not a traditional

587
00:26:22,160 --> 00:26:25,320
Speaker 1: three because I don't I'm not showy with things.

588
00:26:25,520 --> 00:26:27,280
Speaker 2: Well that would make you more of a seven. But

589
00:26:27,520 --> 00:26:32,440
Speaker 2: I think what you know about enneagrams, yeah, only recently

590
00:26:32,520 --> 00:26:36,520
Speaker 2: because we were talking about it because of it. Yeah, yeah,

591
00:26:36,560 --> 00:26:39,800
Speaker 2: but now I'm really into it. And yes, I think

592
00:26:40,200 --> 00:26:42,840
Speaker 2: I do think you're a three. I think that you

593
00:26:43,400 --> 00:26:45,840
Speaker 2: maybe mask some of your threes with like things that

594
00:26:45,880 --> 00:26:49,000
Speaker 2: sevens might say. But I think deeps down inside your.

595
00:26:48,840 --> 00:26:51,040
Speaker 3: Seveny I thought she was a seven at first.

596
00:26:51,040 --> 00:26:51,639
Speaker 1: What's a seven?

597
00:26:51,920 --> 00:26:55,240
Speaker 3: Sevens have like the dilettants have like lots of different

598
00:26:55,240 --> 00:26:57,439
Speaker 3: things that they pursue, lots of different interests, so they

599
00:26:57,480 --> 00:26:58,359
Speaker 3: can be scattered.

600
00:26:59,240 --> 00:27:03,280
Speaker 2: But sevens are like a thrill seeker. They get bored easily.

601
00:27:03,560 --> 00:27:05,840
Speaker 2: That's why that's another element of being a seven for

602
00:27:05,880 --> 00:27:07,320
Speaker 2: you is that you want to jump from thing to

603
00:27:07,359 --> 00:27:09,679
Speaker 2: think the thing because you get bored. I have something,

604
00:27:09,960 --> 00:27:11,880
Speaker 2: you want to just keep moving doing the next thing

605
00:27:11,920 --> 00:27:16,120
Speaker 2: and keep things exciting. But then, but then sevens don't

606
00:27:16,160 --> 00:27:21,679
Speaker 2: really care about getting outside approval if it's boring. So

607
00:27:21,840 --> 00:27:24,480
Speaker 2: like if you receive an award that you don't really

608
00:27:24,520 --> 00:27:26,359
Speaker 2: care about, Like if let's say you receive an award

609
00:27:26,400 --> 00:27:27,720
Speaker 2: for like, I don't.

610
00:27:27,560 --> 00:27:29,640
Speaker 1: Know, hall of Fame at Kirkwod High School.

611
00:27:29,680 --> 00:27:31,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, like you're receiving a ward like hall of Fame

612
00:27:31,040 --> 00:27:34,080
Speaker 2: at Kirkward High School. A seven would be like would

613
00:27:34,080 --> 00:27:36,800
Speaker 2: maybe not even show up to the ceremony, right, but

614
00:27:37,200 --> 00:27:40,280
Speaker 2: three would relish the opportunity to be applauded by all

615
00:27:40,320 --> 00:27:42,399
Speaker 2: of his I don't like the I.

616
00:27:42,400 --> 00:27:45,520
Speaker 1: Don't like to be applauded because I'm embarrassed of it

617
00:27:45,600 --> 00:27:48,760
Speaker 1: and I think that it's undeserved. I really I don't

618
00:27:48,760 --> 00:27:51,879
Speaker 1: feel I don't like hearing your colicious credit but I

619
00:27:51,920 --> 00:27:55,000
Speaker 1: do want. I want everyone to I'm amazing, but I

620
00:27:55,000 --> 00:27:55,960
Speaker 1: don't want to hear about.

621
00:27:55,720 --> 00:27:57,640
Speaker 3: The three is three ever if you're trying to get

622
00:27:57,640 --> 00:27:58,040
Speaker 3: out of it.

623
00:27:58,200 --> 00:28:00,600
Speaker 1: I like being a three. Taylor switches three. I want

624
00:28:00,600 --> 00:28:02,560
Speaker 1: to be a three. They're called the achiever who doesn't

625
00:28:02,600 --> 00:28:03,960
Speaker 1: want everyone wants to be a three.

626
00:28:04,400 --> 00:28:06,480
Speaker 3: I think I don't want to be a three at all.

627
00:28:06,560 --> 00:28:08,840
Speaker 1: Why wouldn't you want to be a three because I don't.

628
00:28:08,920 --> 00:28:11,000
Speaker 1: I know listeners are being like Nikki because everyone wants

629
00:28:11,040 --> 00:28:12,320
Speaker 1: to be here. But I don't think that.

630
00:28:12,440 --> 00:28:16,120
Speaker 3: Three coming from the mindset of a three. When you're

631
00:28:16,119 --> 00:28:18,040
Speaker 3: asking these questions, well the.

632
00:28:17,960 --> 00:28:20,280
Speaker 1: Point of like everyone when you fill out the when

633
00:28:20,320 --> 00:28:23,199
Speaker 1: you take the anagram quiz or whatever, you're instantly like

634
00:28:23,400 --> 00:28:26,400
Speaker 1: why but everyone answers this one? Like you think everyone's

635
00:28:26,440 --> 00:28:27,359
Speaker 1: going to be like you.

636
00:28:27,200 --> 00:28:30,760
Speaker 3: Know, you just you want there's different like kind of

637
00:28:31,520 --> 00:28:34,560
Speaker 3: I want to have, like people recognize that I'm smart.

638
00:28:34,600 --> 00:28:37,880
Speaker 3: I want everyone to say you like the enneagram. First,

639
00:28:37,880 --> 00:28:40,040
Speaker 3: good job for getting us into the enneagram.

640
00:28:40,160 --> 00:28:41,320
Speaker 1: That's important to you.

641
00:28:41,400 --> 00:28:43,280
Speaker 3: Yes, I don't want people thank you for that.

642
00:28:43,280 --> 00:28:45,080
Speaker 1: That is true. You did get us into it. I

643
00:28:45,120 --> 00:28:47,800
Speaker 1: did consult the book that you gave me you were,

644
00:28:48,160 --> 00:28:49,280
Speaker 1: I will say I did.

645
00:28:50,800 --> 00:28:53,040
Speaker 3: And I want people to say you're right. I don't

646
00:28:53,040 --> 00:28:55,640
Speaker 3: want people to want to be right or like I

647
00:28:55,680 --> 00:28:58,600
Speaker 3: want to be acknowledged for my brain.

648
00:28:59,000 --> 00:29:01,480
Speaker 1: Okay, you want like a library after you on like

649
00:29:01,520 --> 00:29:02,280
Speaker 1: a black.

650
00:29:02,160 --> 00:29:05,640
Speaker 3: I want people to be yes, good job, Brian. Wow.

651
00:29:06,200 --> 00:29:08,840
Speaker 3: I want people to say everything that you've been working

652
00:29:08,960 --> 00:29:12,080
Speaker 3: so hard on has a value. But I don't want

653
00:29:12,120 --> 00:29:14,760
Speaker 3: any I want that or any attention. But it's just

654
00:29:15,360 --> 00:29:18,280
Speaker 3: mine is So it's a scale. So like your threehood

655
00:29:18,320 --> 00:29:20,840
Speaker 3: is much heavier than that. You're going to have different

656
00:29:21,880 --> 00:29:22,760
Speaker 3: different parts.

657
00:29:23,720 --> 00:29:25,880
Speaker 2: That makes sense, you're and you know what else makes

658
00:29:25,920 --> 00:29:29,720
Speaker 2: you a five tailor is that you have uh you

659
00:29:29,840 --> 00:29:34,400
Speaker 2: waver between different sides of morality based on what's practical.

660
00:29:34,720 --> 00:29:36,680
Speaker 2: So like I'll take the ern because why wouldn't I

661
00:29:36,760 --> 00:29:38,200
Speaker 2: take the earth? You know, like stuff like that is

662
00:29:38,320 --> 00:29:42,040
Speaker 2: very practical thinking, regardless of what side of the morality is,

663
00:29:42,040 --> 00:29:43,400
Speaker 2: which is a very five thing to do.

664
00:29:43,560 --> 00:29:46,040
Speaker 3: I have my own, yeah, my own ethical code that

665
00:29:46,080 --> 00:29:48,800
Speaker 3: has nothing to do with anyone other anybody else, and

666
00:29:48,840 --> 00:29:50,240
Speaker 3: I follow it very strongly.

667
00:29:50,320 --> 00:29:53,480
Speaker 1: And then ones have their or following ethical that follow

668
00:29:53,560 --> 00:29:55,440
Speaker 1: the rules the ones that okay.

669
00:29:55,200 --> 00:29:57,600
Speaker 3: So wait, let me, think what Brian is. I think

670
00:29:58,200 --> 00:30:04,360
Speaker 3: Brian is a seven. No, I don't know, you.

671
00:30:04,520 --> 00:30:06,080
Speaker 2: Know, because the seven would be a thrill seeker and

672
00:30:06,120 --> 00:30:07,800
Speaker 2: there's nothing I want less than thrills.

673
00:30:08,000 --> 00:30:10,920
Speaker 1: You like to go to national parks, that's so thrilling,

674
00:30:11,000 --> 00:30:12,840
Speaker 1: and that's like and if you like to go on hike.

675
00:30:13,640 --> 00:30:18,280
Speaker 2: But what is motivating me to go to these parks.

676
00:30:17,840 --> 00:30:19,959
Speaker 1: To scratch off the list of I went to that

677
00:30:20,000 --> 00:30:22,520
Speaker 1: park exactly? Okay, so what is that five?

678
00:30:23,280 --> 00:30:27,160
Speaker 2: No? That makes me? That makes me one? Yeah, I'm

679
00:30:27,160 --> 00:30:30,680
Speaker 2: a perfectionist. I'm going to I'm not going to the parks.

680
00:30:30,840 --> 00:30:33,320
Speaker 2: I want to go to all sixty three parks.

681
00:30:33,440 --> 00:30:35,800
Speaker 1: Yes, God, but when you get there, aren't you like?

682
00:30:35,880 --> 00:30:37,400
Speaker 1: And why pick parks though?

683
00:30:37,560 --> 00:30:37,640
Speaker 3: Like?

684
00:30:37,920 --> 00:30:40,280
Speaker 2: Why then when I go to the park, I have

685
00:30:40,360 --> 00:30:43,240
Speaker 2: a complete uh itinerary that I'm that I follow, so

686
00:30:43,240 --> 00:30:45,120
Speaker 2: I make sure that I hit everything that to make

687
00:30:45,160 --> 00:30:47,720
Speaker 2: the to maximize my trip to the park, which is

688
00:30:47,720 --> 00:30:48,720
Speaker 2: a very one thing to do.

689
00:30:49,320 --> 00:30:50,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a good point.

690
00:30:51,000 --> 00:30:52,080
Speaker 3: Chris is also one.

691
00:30:52,160 --> 00:30:57,320
Speaker 1: Chris is a one. Yes, he yes, he likes crystals travel.

692
00:30:57,760 --> 00:31:01,200
Speaker 1: Chris is very black and white one like things are wrong,

693
00:31:01,360 --> 00:31:04,120
Speaker 1: people are bad, or people are and he would not

694
00:31:04,200 --> 00:31:06,600
Speaker 1: say this that he realizes that there is a gray area.

695
00:31:06,640 --> 00:31:09,760
Speaker 1: But I think his initial instinct is that if he

696
00:31:09,800 --> 00:31:12,520
Speaker 1: had a rough time when I would say, like, you know,

697
00:31:12,960 --> 00:31:15,680
Speaker 1: for instance, my ex boy, I can't even call him

698
00:31:15,680 --> 00:31:18,240
Speaker 1: a boyfriend. But Pete Lee, I like, he broke my heart.

699
00:31:18,280 --> 00:31:20,040
Speaker 1: I hated him for years, and when I met Chris,

700
00:31:20,080 --> 00:31:23,760
Speaker 1: I still hated Pete, and so I talked about him

701
00:31:23,800 --> 00:31:25,960
Speaker 1: in a way that was just like, he broke my heart.

702
00:31:26,000 --> 00:31:27,520
Speaker 1: He cheated on his girlfriend with me, and then he

703
00:31:27,640 --> 00:31:29,520
Speaker 1: chose her over me, and then he married her, and

704
00:31:29,520 --> 00:31:31,720
Speaker 1: then I'm so glad they. I just made this whole

705
00:31:31,760 --> 00:31:33,800
Speaker 1: story up about how awful he was. And then when

706
00:31:33,840 --> 00:31:35,600
Speaker 1: Chris and I broke up. In that time we were

707
00:31:35,600 --> 00:31:38,440
Speaker 1: broken up, I became friends with Pete again. And then

708
00:31:38,520 --> 00:31:39,880
Speaker 1: when Chris and I got back together, I was like,

709
00:31:39,920 --> 00:31:41,880
Speaker 1: Pete's great, and he was like, no, he's bad.

710
00:31:42,360 --> 00:31:44,360
Speaker 3: And I'm like, I have everyone so many chances you

711
00:31:44,440 --> 00:31:44,840
Speaker 3: and I.

712
00:31:44,920 --> 00:31:48,360
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm like, no, like you please, I can forgive anyone,

713
00:31:48,720 --> 00:31:52,120
Speaker 1: and he's forgivable. And honestly, I was the problem in

714
00:31:52,120 --> 00:31:53,959
Speaker 1: that scenario. And he's just like, I don't get that,

715
00:31:54,000 --> 00:31:55,760
Speaker 1: like in my mind he was bad. It's hard for

716
00:31:55,880 --> 00:31:58,840
Speaker 1: me to just suddenly let go of all that when

717
00:31:58,880 --> 00:32:01,480
Speaker 1: in my mind he was in this category and so

718
00:32:01,600 --> 00:32:03,040
Speaker 1: that's hard for him to transition.

719
00:32:03,160 --> 00:32:05,920
Speaker 2: Well, the reason why you can forgive anybody is because

720
00:32:05,960 --> 00:32:09,200
Speaker 2: three's main goal is to get approval from others, and

721
00:32:09,240 --> 00:32:12,520
Speaker 2: so any if anybody disapproves of you, you will fight

722
00:32:12,560 --> 00:32:14,560
Speaker 2: to get their approval, even if they're bad.

723
00:32:15,080 --> 00:32:18,120
Speaker 1: Ooh yeah. I mean I definitely have nightmares where my

724
00:32:18,160 --> 00:32:21,480
Speaker 1: mom witnesses me be nice to Donald Trump and she's

725
00:32:21,560 --> 00:32:23,320
Speaker 1: just disgusted with me, even though she would do the

726
00:32:23,320 --> 00:32:25,280
Speaker 1: same thing, because I believe she's of a three.

727
00:32:25,120 --> 00:32:27,800
Speaker 3: Is like, you know what, maybe you weren't so bad.

728
00:32:28,080 --> 00:32:31,200
Speaker 1: And I used to have a joke that I if I

729
00:32:31,360 --> 00:32:32,600
Speaker 1: you know, they always say like, if you had a

730
00:32:32,600 --> 00:32:34,680
Speaker 1: time machine, go back and kill Hitler. And I'm like, yeah,

731
00:32:34,800 --> 00:32:36,280
Speaker 1: I'm gonna go do that. And then I come back

732
00:32:36,320 --> 00:32:38,040
Speaker 1: from the time machine and they're like did you kill him?

733
00:32:38,040 --> 00:32:41,040
Speaker 1: And I'm like, uh yeah, yeah, and they're like, wait,

734
00:32:41,080 --> 00:32:43,440
Speaker 1: why what's that And I'm like nothing, and they're like

735
00:32:43,480 --> 00:32:45,280
Speaker 1: what are you holding And I'm like it's his autograph.

736
00:32:45,360 --> 00:32:47,880
Speaker 1: I'm sorry. I just wanted to like he's scary, and

737
00:32:47,920 --> 00:32:50,960
Speaker 1: I wanted to like me, Like, I want everyone to

738
00:32:51,760 --> 00:32:54,080
Speaker 1: like me, even if they're bad, Like I feel like, also,

739
00:32:54,160 --> 00:32:56,160
Speaker 1: if someone's really evil and they like me, I feel like,

740
00:32:56,200 --> 00:32:58,320
Speaker 1: Oh now I have power over them, and I can

741
00:32:58,480 --> 00:33:01,640
Speaker 1: do something to control the power. I can get in

742
00:33:01,680 --> 00:33:04,160
Speaker 1: there and maybe convince them to not be so bad.

743
00:33:04,520 --> 00:33:06,320
Speaker 2: Well, you know, Trump's probably a three. Also.

744
00:33:07,000 --> 00:33:09,280
Speaker 1: Oh absolutely, so you guys are both Yeah, but he

745
00:33:09,360 --> 00:33:13,240
Speaker 1: is also associated. He doesn't have.

746
00:33:14,440 --> 00:33:16,080
Speaker 2: I have a challenger.

747
00:33:17,080 --> 00:33:20,600
Speaker 1: Oh really, yeah, okay, good. I don't want to be him,

748
00:33:20,760 --> 00:33:23,560
Speaker 1: I will say. Can I report a story that happened

749
00:33:23,600 --> 00:33:26,800
Speaker 1: over the weekend that was so it kind of talks

750
00:33:26,800 --> 00:33:29,240
Speaker 1: about this threeness of wanting them to like me? This

751
00:33:29,320 --> 00:33:32,959
Speaker 1: guy I was walking into Starbucks, because where else am

752
00:33:32,960 --> 00:33:35,480
Speaker 1: I walking into? It's like one of two places, my

753
00:33:35,520 --> 00:33:38,360
Speaker 1: bedroom or Starbucks. I was walking in and I was

754
00:33:38,360 --> 00:33:40,040
Speaker 1: really distracted. I was on my phone and I was

755
00:33:40,040 --> 00:33:41,920
Speaker 1: answering an email I just couldn't get to while I

756
00:33:41,960 --> 00:33:44,000
Speaker 1: was driving, obviously, So as soon as I got done driving,

757
00:33:44,000 --> 00:33:46,040
Speaker 1: I'm like in this email and I'm walking with my

758
00:33:46,080 --> 00:33:49,720
Speaker 1: phone blindly into the store. I opened the door. The

759
00:33:49,920 --> 00:33:53,840
Speaker 1: door pushes into the restaurant, so it opens in right.

760
00:33:53,880 --> 00:33:57,920
Speaker 1: The door is er in and I'm step one foot

761
00:33:57,920 --> 00:33:59,560
Speaker 1: into the restaurant and I see that there's a guy

762
00:33:59,600 --> 00:34:02,040
Speaker 1: like right about to leave, right like, so I kind

763
00:34:02,040 --> 00:34:04,000
Speaker 1: of like as he was about to pull the door,

764
00:34:04,080 --> 00:34:06,560
Speaker 1: I pushed it. So he's right there. What would you

765
00:34:06,600 --> 00:34:09,000
Speaker 1: do in that circumstance there's some one right there, Oh

766
00:34:09,040 --> 00:34:11,400
Speaker 1: you out of the store? Or do you quickly go

767
00:34:11,480 --> 00:34:12,520
Speaker 1: around him and go sorry?

768
00:34:13,160 --> 00:34:15,040
Speaker 3: Go around him and go sorry because you're already in.

769
00:34:15,000 --> 00:34:17,200
Speaker 1: The store, right you have the right of way, Like

770
00:34:17,239 --> 00:34:19,239
Speaker 1: you're a car that pulled out too soon and you're like, fuck,

771
00:34:19,280 --> 00:34:22,080
Speaker 1: I'm sorry. You just instead of backing up and being

772
00:34:22,120 --> 00:34:25,280
Speaker 1: like like making a big you just go faster around.

773
00:34:25,480 --> 00:34:27,759
Speaker 3: I would say sorry like ten times, yeah, to be fair,

774
00:34:27,880 --> 00:34:29,040
Speaker 3: but I would go around.

775
00:34:29,080 --> 00:34:32,000
Speaker 1: Okay, So that's what I did. I just go oh, sorry,

776
00:34:32,040 --> 00:34:34,239
Speaker 1: and I and I quickly scowed it, and I even

777
00:34:34,280 --> 00:34:36,240
Speaker 1: pushed the door out so he would have a little

778
00:34:36,280 --> 00:34:38,120
Speaker 1: like he wouldn't have to get it again, you know,

779
00:34:38,239 --> 00:34:40,520
Speaker 1: like I like flung the door so he would get it.

780
00:34:40,680 --> 00:34:42,440
Speaker 1: And then I quickly went in front of him and

781
00:34:42,480 --> 00:34:46,000
Speaker 1: around and neither is ideal because I was walking blindly

782
00:34:46,120 --> 00:34:48,600
Speaker 1: looking at my phone, and he goes, oh, that's how

783
00:34:48,600 --> 00:34:50,600
Speaker 1: it's gonna be. And by the way, this guy was

784
00:34:50,640 --> 00:34:53,120
Speaker 1: carrying one drink in a tray, like he had a

785
00:34:53,160 --> 00:34:55,759
Speaker 1: tray for four drinks and he had one drink and

786
00:34:55,760 --> 00:34:59,319
Speaker 1: and he was maybe wearing a poly hat. Taylor has

787
00:34:59,360 --> 00:35:02,319
Speaker 1: defined people that are poly amorous relationships that they wear

788
00:35:02,360 --> 00:35:06,440
Speaker 1: poly hats, which are like us or a newsboy.

789
00:35:06,520 --> 00:35:10,880
Speaker 3: How it's uh extra extra Yeah, yeah, why if you

790
00:35:10,960 --> 00:35:16,000
Speaker 3: were it's it's a flat.

791
00:35:15,719 --> 00:35:17,239
Speaker 2: Cap, a flat cap.

792
00:35:17,760 --> 00:35:21,360
Speaker 3: It's not it's newsboys. But yeah, you could wear fedora

793
00:35:21,360 --> 00:35:21,960
Speaker 3: if you wanted to.

794
00:35:22,120 --> 00:35:24,040
Speaker 1: He had a fedora. What were you gonna say, Brian, if.

795
00:35:23,880 --> 00:35:26,399
Speaker 2: You're feel like those people have don't have sex at all?

796
00:35:27,120 --> 00:35:28,920
Speaker 3: I know, but some I know, why are they Polly

797
00:35:29,000 --> 00:35:29,439
Speaker 3: when they don't?

798
00:35:29,520 --> 00:35:31,520
Speaker 1: We call it poly hats for some? Because Taylor was

799
00:35:31,560 --> 00:35:34,360
Speaker 1: like oop, like she was just really going nuts on

800
00:35:34,400 --> 00:35:36,719
Speaker 1: Polly's the couple of years because.

801
00:35:36,600 --> 00:35:39,360
Speaker 3: My partner was saying they wanted to be Polly.

802
00:35:39,560 --> 00:35:41,440
Speaker 1: Well, if you want to reveal those okay, people.

803
00:35:41,160 --> 00:35:43,719
Speaker 3: Were gonna come into my house wearing those hats. What

804
00:35:46,200 --> 00:35:47,120
Speaker 3: how No?

805
00:35:47,600 --> 00:35:50,239
Speaker 1: Wait, okay, I recently was like, am I Polly? And

806
00:35:50,280 --> 00:35:53,200
Speaker 1: I was so disgusted with the idea of being Polly?

807
00:35:53,239 --> 00:35:55,520
Speaker 1: Because you have made them out to be so.

808
00:35:56,560 --> 00:35:58,919
Speaker 3: I mean, you see, I'm sure there's plenty of Polly

809
00:35:58,960 --> 00:36:01,600
Speaker 3: people that are fine, but they're are also a large portion.

810
00:36:01,719 --> 00:36:03,800
Speaker 3: You have to admit that wear those hats.

811
00:36:03,960 --> 00:36:08,000
Speaker 1: I don't know that. Oh my god. We're watching We're

812
00:36:08,040 --> 00:36:11,440
Speaker 1: watching a couple's therapy on Showtime, which is like Anya's

813
00:36:11,440 --> 00:36:13,919
Speaker 1: favorite show. It's this woman who's a therapist named Orna,

814
00:36:13,920 --> 00:36:16,040
Speaker 1: and she talks to these couples and this season there's

815
00:36:16,080 --> 00:36:19,160
Speaker 1: a poly couple. And guess what the woman who's in

816
00:36:19,160 --> 00:36:20,960
Speaker 1: the poly relationship does for a living?

817
00:36:21,280 --> 00:36:22,120
Speaker 3: I mean therapist?

818
00:36:22,400 --> 00:36:25,000
Speaker 1: No, no, no, Like it's around what you were just saying, like,

819
00:36:25,120 --> 00:36:27,120
Speaker 1: what's the crazy, Like if you're writing a character of

820
00:36:27,320 --> 00:36:29,600
Speaker 1: a woman who's in a poly relationship.

821
00:36:29,200 --> 00:36:35,359
Speaker 4: Rope walker, My god, she's a circus. See I know

822
00:36:35,480 --> 00:36:41,120
Speaker 4: about Polly just from analyzing my whole life.

823
00:36:41,160 --> 00:36:43,799
Speaker 1: It does like archery with her feet, you know what

824
00:36:43,800 --> 00:36:47,080
Speaker 1: I'm saying. From a trappie and she's so poly and

825
00:36:47,120 --> 00:36:49,520
Speaker 1: like she'll have a braid and it'll it's this really long,

826
00:36:49,680 --> 00:36:51,960
Speaker 1: lustious braid, but you'll put a wire through it so

827
00:36:52,000 --> 00:36:54,400
Speaker 1: that it'll go like so the braid will like be

828
00:36:54,560 --> 00:36:55,520
Speaker 1: zig zaggy.

829
00:36:55,360 --> 00:36:58,040
Speaker 2: Now I feel like I feel like you're allowed to

830
00:36:58,080 --> 00:37:01,040
Speaker 2: make fun of polly people because you choose to be poly.

831
00:37:01,239 --> 00:37:03,799
Speaker 2: It's not like gay or just like born that.

832
00:37:03,760 --> 00:37:05,319
Speaker 3: Way and you're born that way.

833
00:37:05,320 --> 00:37:06,800
Speaker 1: I would say, they say they're born.

834
00:37:06,640 --> 00:37:10,400
Speaker 2: That way, they're born. That's a lifestyle.

835
00:37:10,600 --> 00:37:15,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, No, they're not conforming to monogamy.

836
00:37:15,080 --> 00:37:15,960
Speaker 2: But it's still a choice.

837
00:37:16,000 --> 00:37:18,600
Speaker 1: It's not like we all probably are poly and we're

838
00:37:18,600 --> 00:37:19,200
Speaker 1: all conformed.

839
00:37:19,280 --> 00:37:23,319
Speaker 3: Maybe it's a trait of your personality, it's not it's

840
00:37:23,360 --> 00:37:24,239
Speaker 3: on a disability.

841
00:37:24,680 --> 00:37:27,839
Speaker 2: No, but well not, it's not a sexuality. I don't

842
00:37:27,840 --> 00:37:30,080
Speaker 2: think it's not sexuality. I think it's a life that

843
00:37:30,360 --> 00:37:33,120
Speaker 2: It's like, you could choose to be emo. You're not

844
00:37:33,239 --> 00:37:35,719
Speaker 2: born emo. Maybe you feel like your emo the same

845
00:37:35,760 --> 00:37:38,359
Speaker 2: thing as you can make fun of an EMO person

846
00:37:38,360 --> 00:37:41,319
Speaker 2: because they chose that, and or you can celebrate them

847
00:37:41,320 --> 00:37:41,880
Speaker 2: if you want to.

848
00:37:42,280 --> 00:37:44,680
Speaker 1: Well, I will say it leads to some pretty celebrating,

849
00:37:44,760 --> 00:37:47,560
Speaker 1: dynamic things. That's just how well in a poly relationship,

850
00:37:47,560 --> 00:37:49,560
Speaker 1: they have like a primary partner, but they've changed the

851
00:37:49,640 --> 00:37:52,600
Speaker 1: name to anchor so that it doesn't have a hierarchy ranking,

852
00:37:53,360 --> 00:37:55,720
Speaker 1: which makes sense to me. Anchors on the bottom scrapes

853
00:37:56,480 --> 00:37:58,680
Speaker 1: this poly guy with a tray that had one drink

854
00:37:58,719 --> 00:38:00,920
Speaker 1: in it. I'll tell you what happen after we get

855
00:38:00,960 --> 00:38:07,080
Speaker 1: back from r Okay. So this poly guy is.

856
00:38:07,200 --> 00:38:08,920
Speaker 2: I don't know, he's only got one drink.

857
00:38:09,040 --> 00:38:12,920
Speaker 3: How hesist and he doesn't get other.

858
00:38:14,560 --> 00:38:16,520
Speaker 2: He just believes he should have many partners and no

859
00:38:16,520 --> 00:38:17,120
Speaker 2: one should care.

860
00:38:17,640 --> 00:38:20,440
Speaker 1: Why would anyone carry one drink in a tray? I

861
00:38:20,480 --> 00:38:24,479
Speaker 1: need to know this because on the edge fill, Yeah,

862
00:38:24,520 --> 00:38:26,640
Speaker 1: I just don't understand what was happening there.

863
00:38:26,680 --> 00:38:29,359
Speaker 3: But that's how it's gonna be.

864
00:38:29,480 --> 00:38:31,480
Speaker 1: He goes, that's how it's gonna be. And he looked

865
00:38:31,480 --> 00:38:34,600
Speaker 1: he just seemed like he had like a weird mustache,

866
00:38:34,640 --> 00:38:37,680
Speaker 1: and he just seemed like he seemed like it like

867
00:38:38,040 --> 00:38:40,640
Speaker 1: someone who builds sets in high school musical. You gotta

868
00:38:40,640 --> 00:38:41,839
Speaker 1: be Cary'll know what they're like.

869
00:38:42,239 --> 00:38:44,680
Speaker 2: You gotta be careful, Nikki with these interactions, because any

870
00:38:44,680 --> 00:38:47,040
Speaker 2: one of these interactions could turn into an article where

871
00:38:48,680 --> 00:38:50,719
Speaker 2: she did drink.

872
00:38:50,840 --> 00:38:53,240
Speaker 1: That is not why I wasn't a bit in the scenario.

873
00:38:53,400 --> 00:38:55,520
Speaker 1: It was not on my mind that I could be recognized.

874
00:38:55,560 --> 00:38:57,839
Speaker 1: It's not at that level yet, But I will say

875
00:38:57,840 --> 00:39:01,080
Speaker 1: that I just was like, I'm trying. I saw this

876
00:39:01,360 --> 00:39:03,759
Speaker 1: fucking Reeal a couple of weeks ago, and I think

877
00:39:03,760 --> 00:39:06,640
Speaker 1: I've talked about it already, but it said, what if

878
00:39:07,400 --> 00:39:10,160
Speaker 1: you let everyone off the hook for everything?

879
00:39:10,239 --> 00:39:10,399
Speaker 2: Oh?

880
00:39:10,480 --> 00:39:12,360
Speaker 1: I always what if you did this? What if you

881
00:39:12,440 --> 00:39:14,360
Speaker 1: let yourself off the hook for things? What if you

882
00:39:14,440 --> 00:39:16,160
Speaker 1: left your husband off the hook for that thing? He

883
00:39:16,200 --> 00:39:20,600
Speaker 1: didn't do the thing he said. I mean, honestly, like,

884
00:39:20,840 --> 00:39:23,440
Speaker 1: what if you let everyone off the hook? Like, just

885
00:39:23,520 --> 00:39:25,880
Speaker 1: try what would happen? And I've been trying to do

886
00:39:25,920 --> 00:39:29,239
Speaker 1: it more consciously when I find myself getting into but.

887
00:39:29,160 --> 00:39:31,480
Speaker 2: You already to do it, that's like something you don't

888
00:39:31,520 --> 00:39:32,880
Speaker 2: need help with you already?

889
00:39:32,960 --> 00:39:35,520
Speaker 1: No, I know, I hold onto things and I'm like,

890
00:39:35,600 --> 00:39:38,040
Speaker 1: why could they do this? If if they behave that

891
00:39:38,080 --> 00:39:41,000
Speaker 1: way I'm talking about my relationship, then I can't be

892
00:39:41,760 --> 00:39:44,759
Speaker 1: with someone that ever would say like this. I just

893
00:39:44,800 --> 00:39:47,239
Speaker 1: go like, that's gonna be my whole life? Is that

894
00:39:47,360 --> 00:39:49,880
Speaker 1: someone that didn't even notice that I got a haircut

895
00:39:49,880 --> 00:39:51,640
Speaker 1: and he did notice and he didn't say the right

896
00:39:51,719 --> 00:39:54,239
Speaker 1: like shit like that. That's not that's just example I'm

897
00:39:54,239 --> 00:39:57,080
Speaker 1: making up. But like I go into like if they

898
00:39:57,120 --> 00:40:02,279
Speaker 1: have it's again they've show they're just I kind of

899
00:40:02,320 --> 00:40:05,879
Speaker 1: get into one territory. If they're like they're bad, I can't.

900
00:40:05,960 --> 00:40:08,600
Speaker 3: Can you think about it and analyze the situation?

901
00:40:08,640 --> 00:40:10,600
Speaker 1: And then I just go, wait, what the fuck? I

902
00:40:10,640 --> 00:40:12,840
Speaker 1: am so fucked up. There's so many things about my

903
00:40:13,080 --> 00:40:16,440
Speaker 1: personality that I would never recommend anyone being in a relationship.

904
00:40:16,440 --> 00:40:18,400
Speaker 1: If they said that this partner was this and this,

905
00:40:18,440 --> 00:40:21,000
Speaker 1: I'd be like, get away from her. So, but you

906
00:40:21,080 --> 00:40:23,400
Speaker 1: got to forgive people for things, and no one, literally

907
00:40:23,400 --> 00:40:24,880
Speaker 1: no one's going to be perfect. And I know that

908
00:40:24,960 --> 00:40:26,960
Speaker 1: everyone is supposed to know that, but I just kind

909
00:40:26,960 --> 00:40:29,080
Speaker 1: of didn't know it until recently. But I've just been

910
00:40:29,160 --> 00:40:32,560
Speaker 1: letting things go. I just like let I don't, especially

911
00:40:32,600 --> 00:40:36,160
Speaker 1: in my relationship, things that used to bother me. I'm

912
00:40:36,200 --> 00:40:38,160
Speaker 1: just like doing what this girl said in this real

913
00:40:38,239 --> 00:40:39,960
Speaker 1: and saying, like, what if I just let him off

914
00:40:39,960 --> 00:40:41,399
Speaker 1: the hook for that, Let's try for the next minute

915
00:40:41,400 --> 00:40:42,680
Speaker 1: to let him off the hook. And then a minute

916
00:40:42,719 --> 00:40:44,600
Speaker 1: later I don't remember what he even was, or if

917
00:40:44,600 --> 00:40:46,200
Speaker 1: I do, I go, let me do one more minute

918
00:40:46,200 --> 00:40:48,000
Speaker 1: of letting him off the hook. Oh I'm still mad

919
00:40:48,040 --> 00:40:49,920
Speaker 1: about it. Okay, maybe I do need to talk about it.

920
00:40:50,080 --> 00:40:53,040
Speaker 1: So this guy, so because I've been doing it consciously

921
00:40:53,120 --> 00:40:56,000
Speaker 1: it's been happening quicker, you know, like I can just

922
00:40:56,040 --> 00:40:59,160
Speaker 1: go to it quickert. So this guy goes, oh, that's

923
00:40:59,160 --> 00:41:01,959
Speaker 1: how it's gonna be, and he thought I wasn't gonna

924
00:41:01,960 --> 00:41:03,680
Speaker 1: say anything. He kind of said it under his breath

925
00:41:03,680 --> 00:41:05,719
Speaker 1: in a way that I maybe wouldn't hear my my

926
00:41:05,760 --> 00:41:07,640
Speaker 1: earphones were in, but he didn't know I wasn't listening

927
00:41:07,640 --> 00:41:12,799
Speaker 1: to anything. So I go, yeah, it is. I go,

928
00:41:12,880 --> 00:41:15,960
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, and he goes, I go, I was on

929
00:41:16,000 --> 00:41:18,479
Speaker 1: my phone, so I didn't see you. I literally didn't.

930
00:41:18,480 --> 00:41:19,719
Speaker 1: I would never have stepped in front of you. I

931
00:41:19,719 --> 00:41:21,160
Speaker 1: didn't see you because I was on my phone. He goes,

932
00:41:21,239 --> 00:41:23,560
Speaker 1: you know what, and that's the problem that right there

933
00:41:23,600 --> 00:41:27,160
Speaker 1: was probably go off the hook no, And I go,

934
00:41:27,280 --> 00:41:29,719
Speaker 1: it is a problem. This is a problem, and thank

935
00:41:29,760 --> 00:41:32,279
Speaker 1: you for reminding I needed this reminder that I need

936
00:41:32,280 --> 00:41:34,040
Speaker 1: to get out of my phone. I go, thank you

937
00:41:34,080 --> 00:41:38,640
Speaker 1: for this lesson today, and he just like baffled and confused,

938
00:41:38,840 --> 00:41:41,560
Speaker 1: just mumbled to himself and walked out like it was

939
00:41:41,640 --> 00:41:44,080
Speaker 1: completely diffused. He couldn't tell if I was being a

940
00:41:44,120 --> 00:41:46,799
Speaker 1: bit or not, because I couldn't even tell because saying

941
00:41:46,840 --> 00:41:49,720
Speaker 1: thank you for this lesson sounds sarcastic, but it actually

942
00:41:49,920 --> 00:41:52,359
Speaker 1: was like I was two in my phone, like this

943
00:41:52,400 --> 00:41:52,759
Speaker 1: isn't well.

944
00:41:52,840 --> 00:41:56,080
Speaker 2: You think, thank you for this lesson, professor genius. Then

945
00:41:56,080 --> 00:41:56,880
Speaker 2: you've curtseyed it.

946
00:41:57,400 --> 00:42:01,360
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, over the edge. But he didn't know what

947
00:42:01,400 --> 00:42:05,239
Speaker 1: to do and it could have escalated. But wow, my

948
00:42:05,239 --> 00:42:08,359
Speaker 1: adrenaline went up so much with that confutation. Holy fuck,

949
00:42:08,560 --> 00:42:10,440
Speaker 1: my body felt like it was on fire.

950
00:42:11,200 --> 00:42:14,600
Speaker 3: I feel like I actually have seen red when somebody

951
00:42:14,640 --> 00:42:16,040
Speaker 3: just says something stupid.

952
00:42:15,920 --> 00:42:19,480
Speaker 1: It's crazy. But we never really confront anyone like That's

953
00:42:19,520 --> 00:42:22,839
Speaker 1: why we can just be We're so divided. I think

954
00:42:22,840 --> 00:42:24,880
Speaker 1: because we can just be assholes all the time in

955
00:42:24,920 --> 00:42:28,440
Speaker 1: our cars and we and online and we never actually

956
00:42:28,480 --> 00:42:31,640
Speaker 1: talked to one another. We see each other side of things,

957
00:42:31,719 --> 00:42:33,200
Speaker 1: and that's what I did in that moment. I felt

958
00:42:33,200 --> 00:42:34,200
Speaker 1: like it really helped.

959
00:42:34,000 --> 00:42:35,840
Speaker 2: Sing each other side of things. Is definitely something. But

960
00:42:35,840 --> 00:42:39,280
Speaker 2: I confront people constantly. Yeah, I feel like that's another

961
00:42:39,360 --> 00:42:41,680
Speaker 2: three things to think is that you don't you don't

962
00:42:41,680 --> 00:42:42,880
Speaker 2: I always confront people.

963
00:42:43,000 --> 00:42:45,400
Speaker 3: Do you do it like snarky or do you just

964
00:42:45,600 --> 00:42:47,640
Speaker 3: like face to face goes.

965
00:42:48,040 --> 00:42:49,920
Speaker 2: You're out their side to argue my side and I

966
00:42:49,960 --> 00:42:51,719
Speaker 2: try to convince them of my side.

967
00:42:52,280 --> 00:42:54,640
Speaker 1: Yes. Well, final thought, one time Brian and I got

968
00:42:54,680 --> 00:43:00,359
Speaker 1: into a really intense like argument like debate. I'd say

969
00:43:00,360 --> 00:43:03,000
Speaker 1: it was a debate about free will. No no, no is

970
00:43:03,040 --> 00:43:05,160
Speaker 1: in front of It was on f Boy Island, which

971
00:43:05,160 --> 00:43:08,040
Speaker 1: he was writing on and producing on, and so he

972
00:43:08,360 --> 00:43:11,080
Speaker 1: was in It was in my dressing room, pretty much

973
00:43:11,080 --> 00:43:13,200
Speaker 1: my room that I was living in over the summer,

974
00:43:13,719 --> 00:43:17,279
Speaker 1: and my makeup and stylast girls were in the room

975
00:43:17,280 --> 00:43:19,520
Speaker 1: and they were just like so awkward because they were like,

976
00:43:19,560 --> 00:43:21,120
Speaker 1: oh my god, this is getting so heated. But Brian

977
00:43:21,120 --> 00:43:23,839
Speaker 1: and I were like thriving in it.

978
00:43:23,840 --> 00:43:26,480
Speaker 3: It doesn't happen. It's scary to have so much.

979
00:43:26,320 --> 00:43:28,760
Speaker 1: Fun with it. What was the last time you confronted someone? Brian?

980
00:43:30,800 --> 00:43:34,720
Speaker 2: Well, I mean I call my friend robster in almost

981
00:43:34,800 --> 00:43:38,239
Speaker 2: every day and then we argue about something every phone call.

982
00:43:38,600 --> 00:43:41,000
Speaker 1: Do you ever walk away from that having your mind changed?

983
00:43:43,520 --> 00:43:46,320
Speaker 2: Rarely? I think nine times out of ten, my mind's

984
00:43:46,360 --> 00:43:49,359
Speaker 2: not changed, but everyone out of ten it is.

985
00:43:50,000 --> 00:43:51,360
Speaker 3: It's his Enneagram number.

986
00:43:52,440 --> 00:43:54,640
Speaker 2: I've been thinking about that and I can't figure it out.

987
00:43:54,640 --> 00:43:56,880
Speaker 3: Because that's an interesting Send them a quiz.

988
00:43:57,440 --> 00:44:00,719
Speaker 1: Well, I this weekend talked to a friend of mine

989
00:44:00,800 --> 00:44:03,200
Speaker 1: about like something with her and her husband, and she

990
00:44:03,200 --> 00:44:06,399
Speaker 1: she was like when she loses things all the time

991
00:44:07,200 --> 00:44:10,040
Speaker 1: and misplaces her own stuff. So she lost her wallet

992
00:44:10,040 --> 00:44:11,520
Speaker 1: for a couple of weeks because she acidentally put it

993
00:44:11,520 --> 00:44:14,600
Speaker 1: in her daughter's bag, like her backpack when she was cleaning,

994
00:44:14,680 --> 00:44:17,319
Speaker 1: like you know, just like eighty D stuff. Yeah, forgot it.

995
00:44:17,520 --> 00:44:19,200
Speaker 1: Obviously didn't know she put it in there, would never

996
00:44:19,200 --> 00:44:20,920
Speaker 1: even looked, but that's where it ended up being for

997
00:44:20,960 --> 00:44:22,960
Speaker 1: like three weeks and then they eventually found it. But

998
00:44:23,040 --> 00:44:25,000
Speaker 1: in that three weeks, he lent her his credit card

999
00:44:25,040 --> 00:44:27,759
Speaker 1: because she was trying. She knew she didn't like it,

1000
00:44:27,800 --> 00:44:29,560
Speaker 1: didn't get stolen, her wallet was gonna show up, so

1001
00:44:29,640 --> 00:44:31,799
Speaker 1: she used this credit card and then he can I

1002
00:44:31,800 --> 00:44:33,319
Speaker 1: get my credit card back? And she looked in her

1003
00:44:33,320 --> 00:44:34,680
Speaker 1: bag that she put it in and she was like, oh,

1004
00:44:34,760 --> 00:44:36,680
Speaker 1: that's not here. I'll find it. And he was just

1005
00:44:36,719 --> 00:44:39,319
Speaker 1: like he kind of blew up, like how do you

1006
00:44:39,480 --> 00:44:41,920
Speaker 1: keep losing everything? And now you've lost my thing? And

1007
00:44:41,920 --> 00:44:44,200
Speaker 1: he's like, you need to be better about this, and

1008
00:44:44,239 --> 00:44:46,400
Speaker 1: she's just like, I am the way I am, Like

1009
00:44:46,480 --> 00:44:49,839
Speaker 1: I can't remember to remember things. And I said, well,

1010
00:44:49,840 --> 00:44:51,840
Speaker 1: maybe you ask him for help. I'm like if this

1011
00:44:51,960 --> 00:44:53,480
Speaker 1: was happening with me and Chris. Chris would be like,

1012
00:44:53,680 --> 00:44:55,759
Speaker 1: I'll get you a little like sensor to put in

1013
00:44:55,840 --> 00:44:57,440
Speaker 1: your wallet so that you can have an app on

1014
00:44:57,440 --> 00:44:59,480
Speaker 1: your phone. Chris would find a way that fits the

1015
00:44:59,480 --> 00:45:02,000
Speaker 1: way I think. But instead her husband was just like,

1016
00:45:02,320 --> 00:45:04,480
Speaker 1: just think more like I do. And she's like, well,

1017
00:45:04,520 --> 00:45:06,160
Speaker 1: I don't have the same brain as you, and they don't.

1018
00:45:06,200 --> 00:45:08,239
Speaker 1: They just come do a like you know ahead, and

1019
00:45:08,280 --> 00:45:11,120
Speaker 1: then she gets really defensive, like I didn't mean to

1020
00:45:11,520 --> 00:45:13,560
Speaker 1: and you know what, You're so mean, and like she

1021
00:45:13,560 --> 00:45:16,520
Speaker 1: gets immediately defensive. So then I told her to do

1022
00:45:16,560 --> 00:45:18,560
Speaker 1: the thing that I always do with Chris, which is

1023
00:45:18,600 --> 00:45:21,560
Speaker 1: like or like with really anyone i'm arguing with, especially

1024
00:45:21,600 --> 00:45:24,160
Speaker 1: my sister. When we used to fight. I used to

1025
00:45:24,719 --> 00:45:26,439
Speaker 1: she used to say I hate you, and I would say,

1026
00:45:27,000 --> 00:45:29,640
Speaker 1: I know exactly how you feel because I hate you.

1027
00:45:30,160 --> 00:45:31,799
Speaker 1: She'd be like, I literally wouldn't care if you died,

1028
00:45:31,840 --> 00:45:34,040
Speaker 1: and I was like, Lauren, it's so weird because I

1029
00:45:34,080 --> 00:45:36,000
Speaker 1: know that exact feeling, like I want you to die,

1030
00:45:36,000 --> 00:45:37,399
Speaker 1: and she's like, I want you to die, and we'd

1031
00:45:37,400 --> 00:45:40,360
Speaker 1: like find a common ground, but I was like, your

1032
00:45:40,480 --> 00:45:43,560
Speaker 1: husband is getting just as frustrated. He can't believe when

1033
00:45:43,600 --> 00:45:46,000
Speaker 1: you lose his credit card, he's thinking you don't love

1034
00:45:46,120 --> 00:45:49,520
Speaker 1: him like you you are taking his property and being

1035
00:45:49,560 --> 00:45:51,719
Speaker 1: like willy nilly with it. You're so when you don't

1036
00:45:51,719 --> 00:45:53,319
Speaker 1: put that credit card back in a place you know

1037
00:45:53,360 --> 00:45:56,200
Speaker 1: it will be found, you're not caring about him. And

1038
00:45:56,239 --> 00:45:58,840
Speaker 1: that's what it feels like. And so when he yells

1039
00:45:58,880 --> 00:46:02,279
Speaker 1: at you about this the way that you feel like,

1040
00:46:02,320 --> 00:46:03,640
Speaker 1: how could he yell at me like this? How can

1041
00:46:03,680 --> 00:46:06,600
Speaker 1: he talk to me like this? That's so disrespectful. It's

1042
00:46:06,760 --> 00:46:08,960
Speaker 1: literally the same way he feels about you losing his

1043
00:46:09,000 --> 00:46:11,200
Speaker 1: credit card. And you both don't mean to do it

1044
00:46:11,239 --> 00:46:13,200
Speaker 1: to each other, because no one really wants to make

1045
00:46:13,239 --> 00:46:16,640
Speaker 1: someone else feel horrible unless you know, but it is

1046
00:46:16,680 --> 00:46:19,680
Speaker 1: a shaming thing, like the shame. But she was like, oh,

1047
00:46:19,719 --> 00:46:22,960
Speaker 1: that's a good point. Just try to see from their perspective,

1048
00:46:23,160 --> 00:46:25,359
Speaker 1: because generally, if you're frustrated with someone, they're just as

1049
00:46:25,360 --> 00:46:27,640
Speaker 1: frustrated with you, and you have that in common. And

1050
00:46:27,680 --> 00:46:30,000
Speaker 1: that's helped me. Like that guy hated me as much

1051
00:46:30,040 --> 00:46:30,920
Speaker 1: as I hated.

1052
00:46:30,719 --> 00:46:34,320
Speaker 3: Him for and I don't understand what the problem.

1053
00:46:34,360 --> 00:46:36,160
Speaker 1: But because I just like cut in front of I

1054
00:46:36,200 --> 00:46:38,640
Speaker 1: didn't see him and that guy is aging. He's probably

1055
00:46:38,680 --> 00:46:42,040
Speaker 1: not be he never got seen by women. Here's another woman,

1056
00:46:42,640 --> 00:46:45,520
Speaker 1: and I'm like, forty, I'm about to not be seen.

1057
00:46:45,640 --> 00:46:48,360
Speaker 2: The technology thing probably pisses him off too, that everyone's

1058
00:46:48,360 --> 00:46:49,319
Speaker 2: down their phones now.

1059
00:46:49,680 --> 00:46:51,319
Speaker 1: And yeah, that's another thing.

1060
00:46:53,400 --> 00:46:54,080
Speaker 3: In New York.

1061
00:46:54,719 --> 00:46:56,520
Speaker 2: When I lived in New York City, there there were

1062
00:46:56,560 --> 00:47:00,799
Speaker 2: people who would paint on the sidewalk look up, like said,

1063
00:47:00,920 --> 00:47:03,360
Speaker 2: to get you to like stop looking down at your phone.

1064
00:47:04,000 --> 00:47:06,240
Speaker 1: Sorry, I'm looking at my phone on the sidewalk.

1065
00:47:06,680 --> 00:47:08,240
Speaker 3: Yeah, not looking at your shoes.

1066
00:47:08,560 --> 00:47:11,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, emo there. And then there's this other thing I've

1067
00:47:11,960 --> 00:47:14,480
Speaker 1: been doing that. I mean, there are some things you

1068
00:47:14,520 --> 00:47:16,920
Speaker 1: get from your phone that have been helpful. I think

1069
00:47:16,920 --> 00:47:18,920
Speaker 1: I shared this too, but I guess I'll just repeat it.

1070
00:47:18,960 --> 00:47:21,960
Speaker 1: But when I'm really having a hard time, if you

1071
00:47:21,960 --> 00:47:24,399
Speaker 1: talk to yourself in third person, it's supposed to really work,

1072
00:47:24,760 --> 00:47:27,440
Speaker 1: oh as opposed to saying like you've got this, like

1073
00:47:27,800 --> 00:47:30,160
Speaker 1: keep going, Like when I'm in these really hard, stupid

1074
00:47:30,160 --> 00:47:33,480
Speaker 1: pilates classes and I'm like I want to give up.

1075
00:47:33,560 --> 00:47:36,520
Speaker 1: I just go, Nicki, you can do this. Nikki, You're amazing. Nicki,

1076
00:47:36,560 --> 00:47:39,600
Speaker 1: I say Niki in my head, and so in that

1077
00:47:39,719 --> 00:47:42,040
Speaker 1: is supposed to. There's been studies that motivate you so

1078
00:47:42,160 --> 00:47:43,719
Speaker 1: much more if you say your name and you talk

1079
00:47:43,760 --> 00:47:46,480
Speaker 1: to yourself like you're a friend, yeah, you sting than

1080
00:47:46,520 --> 00:47:48,640
Speaker 1: if you just are like good job you or whatever.

1081
00:47:48,719 --> 00:47:51,640
Speaker 2: I concur I agree with this statement. I feel like

1082
00:47:51,640 --> 00:47:54,319
Speaker 2: it works for you that I call myself Brie even

1083
00:47:54,360 --> 00:47:56,840
Speaker 2: which is like a oh that's loving. Yeah, I go,

1084
00:47:56,880 --> 00:47:58,279
Speaker 2: come on, Briy, you can do this.

1085
00:47:58,920 --> 00:48:01,319
Speaker 1: When have you done that to your like working out

1086
00:48:01,360 --> 00:48:03,239
Speaker 1: you're talking about or like when when do you need

1087
00:48:03,280 --> 00:48:03,640
Speaker 1: to do that?

1088
00:48:03,760 --> 00:48:05,560
Speaker 2: The last time I recall doing it was when I

1089
00:48:05,640 --> 00:48:09,000
Speaker 2: was I was confronting death in the shower again and

1090
00:48:09,040 --> 00:48:10,840
Speaker 2: I was screaming, and then I said, Briy, you just

1091
00:48:10,880 --> 00:48:12,880
Speaker 2: got to stop thinking about it. Just make an agreement

1092
00:48:13,160 --> 00:48:14,880
Speaker 2: that you're not gonna that you don't have to think

1093
00:48:14,920 --> 00:48:17,560
Speaker 2: about it for a year. It's okay for you.

1094
00:48:17,880 --> 00:48:21,080
Speaker 1: That's interesting, Like do that test of like let's you know,

1095
00:48:21,360 --> 00:48:23,719
Speaker 1: we'll revisit this later. Yeah, you can always get back

1096
00:48:23,760 --> 00:48:24,080
Speaker 1: to it.

1097
00:48:24,239 --> 00:48:28,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, and then yeah, constant just yeah, just anything really,

1098
00:48:28,120 --> 00:48:30,239
Speaker 2: anything that you're trying to push yourself through or you're

1099
00:48:30,280 --> 00:48:32,280
Speaker 2: trying to redirect your attention.

1100
00:48:33,719 --> 00:48:35,960
Speaker 1: I've been trying to just let go. I mean, I've

1101
00:48:36,000 --> 00:48:38,319
Speaker 1: read that book letting Go. I didn't finish it because

1102
00:48:38,360 --> 00:48:41,040
Speaker 1: I just need to absorb it all. I haven't let

1103
00:48:41,080 --> 00:48:44,000
Speaker 1: go with the book even but I'm just find that

1104
00:48:44,080 --> 00:48:46,680
Speaker 1: when I let go, like my relationship has improved so

1105
00:48:46,760 --> 00:48:48,879
Speaker 1: much since I've just done this thing of like letting

1106
00:48:48,960 --> 00:48:51,280
Speaker 1: people off, like letting go, like just stop trying.

1107
00:48:51,080 --> 00:48:53,120
Speaker 2: To game here off the hook, like.

1108
00:48:53,080 --> 00:48:56,279
Speaker 1: It's true if you just let go. But then I

1109
00:48:56,360 --> 00:48:58,920
Speaker 1: also realized that so many of my achievements are not

1110
00:48:58,960 --> 00:49:01,759
Speaker 1: from letting go. They're from working very hard and putting

1111
00:49:01,800 --> 00:49:03,839
Speaker 1: a ton of pressure on myself. So I just don't

1112
00:49:03,840 --> 00:49:06,240
Speaker 1: know which is which. But I do know that with singing,

1113
00:49:06,320 --> 00:49:09,200
Speaker 1: I'm like really hitting a roadblock. I'm so disappointed with myself.

1114
00:49:09,239 --> 00:49:11,680
Speaker 1: I sang. The thing about singing is we did karaoke

1115
00:49:11,800 --> 00:49:14,399
Speaker 1: this weekend for my birthday, and I love it so much,

1116
00:49:14,440 --> 00:49:18,239
Speaker 1: But I always suffer a depression after the night after,

1117
00:49:18,360 --> 00:49:19,840
Speaker 1: like when I go home and sleep. None of my

1118
00:49:19,840 --> 00:49:21,279
Speaker 1: friends know this, that's saying with me, But I go

1119
00:49:21,320 --> 00:49:23,400
Speaker 1: through a depression because I don't sound as good as

1120
00:49:23,400 --> 00:49:27,920
Speaker 1: I want to sound, and I'm like taking less I

1121
00:49:27,920 --> 00:49:31,480
Speaker 1: can hear myself. There's a microphone it's amplified and everyone

1122
00:49:31,560 --> 00:49:36,120
Speaker 1: knows you know when you do good, like people say wow.

1123
00:49:36,040 --> 00:49:38,840
Speaker 2: Like the get quiet back and people actually listen.

1124
00:49:39,880 --> 00:49:42,680
Speaker 1: Yes, Like my dad gets showered with accolades when he

1125
00:49:42,719 --> 00:49:44,600
Speaker 1: sings because he's a really good singer. So I know

1126
00:49:44,680 --> 00:49:46,919
Speaker 1: what the bar is. I know what people will say

1127
00:49:46,920 --> 00:49:48,759
Speaker 1: when you're good, and I'm not expecting that, like I'm

1128
00:49:48,800 --> 00:49:50,960
Speaker 1: not like no one said it was good. Please to

1129
00:49:51,000 --> 00:49:53,440
Speaker 1: the girls listening from the girls Chat, Yeah you did

1130
00:49:53,480 --> 00:49:55,440
Speaker 1: not disappoint me by not saying I was good singer.

1131
00:49:55,760 --> 00:49:57,440
Speaker 1: I want it when I deserve it. But I just

1132
00:49:57,480 --> 00:49:58,040
Speaker 1: didn't deserve it.

1133
00:49:58,080 --> 00:49:58,560
Speaker 2: But because.

1134
00:50:00,440 --> 00:50:02,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, oh, and they would never plagate me like that,

1135
00:50:02,960 --> 00:50:05,040
Speaker 1: I really trust them not to. But because I can

1136
00:50:05,040 --> 00:50:07,399
Speaker 1: see through all of Yeah I could, I could see

1137
00:50:07,400 --> 00:50:12,319
Speaker 1: through it. They'd be like, you're right, bit jab. But

1138
00:50:12,760 --> 00:50:14,400
Speaker 1: I just went to a voice lesson today and it

1139
00:50:14,520 --> 00:50:18,120
Speaker 1: was just another he's just like you. Your voice is

1140
00:50:18,160 --> 00:50:20,399
Speaker 1: in you. You are just like holding it back because

1141
00:50:20,440 --> 00:50:21,920
Speaker 1: you're so scared of what it will sound like if

1142
00:50:21,960 --> 00:50:24,439
Speaker 1: you let go of it. You're not like you want

1143
00:50:24,440 --> 00:50:26,000
Speaker 1: it on, You have it on a leash. So I

1144
00:50:26,000 --> 00:50:28,000
Speaker 1: have to be like non monogamous with my voice. Like

1145
00:50:28,040 --> 00:50:30,480
Speaker 1: the way I want to be with like I like

1146
00:50:30,560 --> 00:50:33,200
Speaker 1: I always talk about non monogamy of like I don't

1147
00:50:33,239 --> 00:50:35,200
Speaker 1: really care. Like I wouldn't care if Chris hooked up

1148
00:50:35,200 --> 00:50:37,759
Speaker 1: with another girl because I don't want. I don't want

1149
00:50:37,800 --> 00:50:40,799
Speaker 1: him to obviously, but he has the to me, he

1150
00:50:40,840 --> 00:50:43,200
Speaker 1: has the option, which he never would go through with.

1151
00:50:43,600 --> 00:50:45,640
Speaker 1: But he does have the option to me because I don't.

1152
00:50:45,680 --> 00:50:47,319
Speaker 1: I want a dog that's off leash. I want a

1153
00:50:47,320 --> 00:50:49,000
Speaker 1: dog that chooses to be with me, even though it

1154
00:50:49,040 --> 00:50:52,560
Speaker 1: has chicken. But my voice, I'm so scared of it

1155
00:50:52,680 --> 00:50:56,040
Speaker 1: sounding bad that I'm always like keeping it in. So

1156
00:50:56,040 --> 00:50:58,839
Speaker 1: I've been doing a lot of manifestations of letting go

1157
00:50:59,120 --> 00:51:03,640
Speaker 1: and trying to I'm like really deep in the manifestation community.

1158
00:51:04,200 --> 00:51:07,080
Speaker 1: Neville Goddard. Have you heard of him? Have you ever

1159
00:51:07,080 --> 00:51:10,160
Speaker 1: gotten into that? Oh my god. Well it's based in

1160
00:51:10,239 --> 00:51:13,520
Speaker 1: like science and physics and quantum physics. I believe it,

1161
00:51:13,640 --> 00:51:16,399
Speaker 1: and it like you can have you can like get

1162
00:51:16,480 --> 00:51:19,960
Speaker 1: money from manifest Okay, it's crazy, but I.

1163
00:51:19,880 --> 00:51:23,359
Speaker 3: Mean not to sing like I have money, I have this,

1164
00:51:23,440 --> 00:51:24,840
Speaker 3: I have a new sub and then you write it

1165
00:51:24,840 --> 00:51:25,959
Speaker 3: in the but you.

1166
00:51:25,920 --> 00:51:28,800
Speaker 1: Have to you have to like feel it though the

1167
00:51:29,200 --> 00:51:33,640
Speaker 1: problem is I can't convince myself it's already happened. I've

1168
00:51:33,640 --> 00:51:36,759
Speaker 1: already manifested one thing it's happening. I'm not even gonna

1169
00:51:36,760 --> 00:51:38,279
Speaker 1: say what it is because I've already did it and

1170
00:51:38,320 --> 00:51:40,879
Speaker 1: it hasn't it is happened. It's there's just no way

1171
00:51:40,880 --> 00:51:42,239
Speaker 1: it's gonna happen because I'm so sure of it. So

1172
00:51:42,239 --> 00:51:44,600
Speaker 1: I don't need to manifest that one anymore. But there

1173
00:51:44,600 --> 00:51:47,640
Speaker 1: are ones, like I'm trying to manifest being a good singer,

1174
00:51:47,680 --> 00:51:49,680
Speaker 1: and it's just not every time I do it. I

1175
00:51:49,719 --> 00:51:51,600
Speaker 1: do these, Man, it's right before you go to sleep.

1176
00:51:51,600 --> 00:51:53,200
Speaker 1: You're supposed to do it right before you fall asleep.

1177
00:51:53,239 --> 00:51:55,279
Speaker 1: There's like this window where you're in kind of like

1178
00:51:55,280 --> 00:51:57,160
Speaker 1: a twilight, you know, right before you go asleep, but

1179
00:51:57,200 --> 00:52:00,400
Speaker 1: you're like still awake. That's where your body's really relaxed

1180
00:52:00,480 --> 00:52:07,000
Speaker 1: enough to change change your life and and project all

1181
00:52:07,040 --> 00:52:09,839
Speaker 1: these changes into your physical matter. Like you can get

1182
00:52:09,880 --> 00:52:12,680
Speaker 1: bigger boobs from doing it, like people have reported clear

1183
00:52:12,760 --> 00:52:16,640
Speaker 1: skin overnight, bigger boobs in fifteen minutes. Like this ship

1184
00:52:16,880 --> 00:52:19,480
Speaker 1: will happen if you tap into the but it's really

1185
00:52:19,520 --> 00:52:21,799
Speaker 1: hard to do because you have to relax completely and

1186
00:52:21,840 --> 00:52:25,160
Speaker 1: you have to fucking believe that it's already is real.

1187
00:52:25,800 --> 00:52:27,360
Speaker 1: You don't have to believe, like what would it be

1188
00:52:27,400 --> 00:52:29,680
Speaker 1: like to have big boobs like whoa, they're growing? You

1189
00:52:29,719 --> 00:52:32,239
Speaker 1: have to like feel in your body you have big

1190
00:52:32,320 --> 00:52:34,520
Speaker 1: tits and know what that would feel like and feel

1191
00:52:36,000 --> 00:52:36,879
Speaker 1: I don't know. I just like.

1192
00:52:39,120 --> 00:52:39,239
Speaker 2: This.

1193
00:52:39,280 --> 00:52:42,800
Speaker 1: One girl on my subreddit was like about Nevill Goddard,

1194
00:52:42,880 --> 00:52:44,839
Speaker 1: who is the guy that created this kind of form

1195
00:52:44,880 --> 00:52:47,680
Speaker 1: of manifestation. She was like, I had a bra that

1196
00:52:47,760 --> 00:52:50,279
Speaker 1: was too big, and I just decided to like, oh

1197
00:52:50,320 --> 00:52:52,080
Speaker 1: what if I just tried to get Like, let me

1198
00:52:52,120 --> 00:52:54,520
Speaker 1: just instead of returning this because it's such a passle

1199
00:52:54,520 --> 00:52:56,680
Speaker 1: to return, I'll just see if I can do a

1200
00:52:56,680 --> 00:53:01,640
Speaker 1: fifteen minute manifestation fit yes, And she was like, I

1201
00:53:01,640 --> 00:53:03,600
Speaker 1: thought it would be like maybe a week of doing it.

1202
00:53:03,680 --> 00:53:05,680
Speaker 1: She was like I tried it on later because I

1203
00:53:05,719 --> 00:53:07,560
Speaker 1: literally didn't have another broad a wear and it was

1204
00:53:07,680 --> 00:53:10,879
Speaker 1: fifteen minutes later my boobs fit in it. Who knows

1205
00:53:10,920 --> 00:53:12,719
Speaker 1: if the shit is real? I'm gonna have to try this,

1206
00:53:12,880 --> 00:53:16,080
Speaker 1: but I really do. I am a skeptic about everything,

1207
00:53:16,120 --> 00:53:17,520
Speaker 1: and I think that there's something to this.

1208
00:53:17,840 --> 00:53:21,040
Speaker 2: I mean, you maybe subconsciously directed your brain to send

1209
00:53:21,040 --> 00:53:23,520
Speaker 2: more like fluid to the tits to make them bigger.

1210
00:53:23,560 --> 00:53:24,120
Speaker 3: I think you can.

1211
00:53:24,320 --> 00:53:27,640
Speaker 2: You probably have control over things within your own body

1212
00:53:28,040 --> 00:53:31,080
Speaker 2: to a degree. Yeah, so maybe it's possible.

1213
00:53:32,160 --> 00:53:34,040
Speaker 1: I'm about to purge so much stuff.

1214
00:53:34,200 --> 00:53:34,520
Speaker 3: Taylor.

1215
00:53:34,600 --> 00:53:37,279
Speaker 1: We got to go because Taylor is going to get

1216
00:53:37,320 --> 00:53:40,000
Speaker 1: rid of that suitcase is filled with purge, and then

1217
00:53:40,040 --> 00:53:42,239
Speaker 1: that there's another suitcase that's filled with purge. But I

1218
00:53:42,280 --> 00:53:44,719
Speaker 1: want to go through another one and just make a

1219
00:53:44,760 --> 00:53:46,240
Speaker 1: pile of purge stuff.

1220
00:53:46,440 --> 00:53:46,760
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1221
00:53:46,840 --> 00:53:49,279
Speaker 1: I just want to get rid of everything in my life,

1222
00:53:49,480 --> 00:53:53,239
Speaker 1: get rid of chords. I just got it. I got

1223
00:53:53,239 --> 00:53:57,560
Speaker 1: to get rid of her keeping moment. I got a

1224
00:53:57,560 --> 00:54:00,640
Speaker 1: new computer, I got a new phone today, and I'm

1225
00:54:00,680 --> 00:54:03,440
Speaker 1: getting a new car soon, and I'm getting I'm just

1226
00:54:03,560 --> 00:54:06,160
Speaker 1: upgrading all the things that will keep my life simple.

1227
00:54:06,800 --> 00:54:09,400
Speaker 3: I'll take this cash payout of two dollars. It's a

1228
00:54:09,400 --> 00:54:09,920
Speaker 3: good purpose.

1229
00:54:09,920 --> 00:54:12,400
Speaker 1: Oh is that a there's a yeah, great, here's a

1230
00:54:12,680 --> 00:54:15,200
Speaker 1: scratch a ticket right over there. Oh yeah, take it.

1231
00:54:16,000 --> 00:54:18,000
Speaker 1: Getting rid of that, getting rid of that two dollars.

1232
00:54:18,239 --> 00:54:20,760
Speaker 2: This is like literally spring cleaning.

1233
00:54:20,800 --> 00:54:21,719
Speaker 1: You're letting go.

1234
00:54:22,040 --> 00:54:25,719
Speaker 2: This is what's happening. It's spring or is it summer? Now?

1235
00:54:26,760 --> 00:54:31,400
Speaker 1: It's not so summer till twenty first. I'm getting rid

1236
00:54:31,440 --> 00:54:34,400
Speaker 1: of stuff. I just it's too much. I'm feeling cluttered,

1237
00:54:34,400 --> 00:54:37,000
Speaker 1: I'm feeling too small in my space. Got to get

1238
00:54:37,080 --> 00:54:40,120
Speaker 1: rid of stuff. Even though I did go to Target

1239
00:54:40,160 --> 00:54:41,520
Speaker 1: yesterday and I got some new stuff.

1240
00:54:41,640 --> 00:54:42,759
Speaker 3: So one in, one out.

1241
00:54:43,200 --> 00:54:45,400
Speaker 1: Okay, you gotta get rid of old ship. Yeah, I

1242
00:54:45,400 --> 00:54:46,920
Speaker 1: gotta get rid of T shirts. But what do you

1243
00:54:46,960 --> 00:54:49,160
Speaker 1: do with T shirts that have sentimental valley?

1244
00:54:49,320 --> 00:54:51,440
Speaker 3: You just put them at the thrift store and let

1245
00:54:51,440 --> 00:54:51,680
Speaker 3: it go.

1246
00:54:52,520 --> 00:54:53,040
Speaker 1: Let go.

1247
00:54:53,160 --> 00:54:55,520
Speaker 3: It's hard, I know, because you have you have T

1248
00:54:55,600 --> 00:54:57,480
Speaker 3: shirts from like every show you've done, and.

1249
00:54:57,640 --> 00:55:01,359
Speaker 2: I have one little I have one container for sentimental

1250
00:55:01,400 --> 00:55:03,799
Speaker 2: T shirts and that's where all the sentimental T shirts go,

1251
00:55:04,000 --> 00:55:08,240
Speaker 2: or sentimental things even yeah, one Ben, yeah, one Ben.

1252
00:55:08,560 --> 00:55:09,759
Speaker 2: You know't don't want to get rid of all like

1253
00:55:09,800 --> 00:55:12,480
Speaker 2: I have. I still up shirts from like the deli

1254
00:55:12,560 --> 00:55:15,480
Speaker 2: I worked at at high school, or like my group

1255
00:55:15,480 --> 00:55:16,680
Speaker 2: in college, and I don't want.

1256
00:55:16,520 --> 00:55:18,279
Speaker 3: To get rid of those I had high school shirt

1257
00:55:18,440 --> 00:55:20,320
Speaker 3: because one day there will be like a Nikki museum

1258
00:55:20,320 --> 00:55:23,879
Speaker 3: and you can frame them. I do want things, yeah,

1259
00:55:23,920 --> 00:55:25,879
Speaker 3: but I just make sure it's a bin and then

1260
00:55:25,920 --> 00:55:27,680
Speaker 3: you if it gets too full, you go through and

1261
00:55:27,719 --> 00:55:28,920
Speaker 3: you go. Look, I don't really need this.

1262
00:55:28,960 --> 00:55:30,640
Speaker 1: Okay, we got to go stack some. We got to

1263
00:55:30,680 --> 00:55:33,520
Speaker 1: go stuff some stack and sentimental stuff and Bin's Thank

1264
00:55:33,520 --> 00:55:35,239
Speaker 1: you guys for listening to the podcast. We will be

1265
00:55:35,520 --> 00:55:38,160
Speaker 1: here next week on the show. Don't you think we

1266
00:55:38,239 --> 00:55:42,520
Speaker 1: won't This weekend Salt Lake City, Boulder, Colorado. Two shows

1267
00:55:42,520 --> 00:55:46,480
Speaker 1: on Saturday night next week Indianapolis and Cleveland. Yeah, it'll

1268
00:55:46,520 --> 00:55:49,960
Speaker 1: be so fun. Two shows in Boulder. So excited. Thank

1269
00:55:50,000 --> 00:55:52,000
Speaker 1: you for coming to shows so many At niku lazer

1270
00:55:52,000 --> 00:55:55,200
Speaker 1: dot com. I'm literally on tour every single week for

1271
00:55:55,239 --> 00:55:57,880
Speaker 1: the rest of the year, so so I'm going everywhere.

1272
00:55:57,920 --> 00:56:00,400
Speaker 1: If I'm not near you just you just drive a

1273
00:56:00,400 --> 00:56:02,919
Speaker 1: couple hours and you'll hit me. Can't wait to see

1274
00:56:02,920 --> 00:56:04,120
Speaker 1: you guys on the road. Thank you for listening to

1275
00:56:04,160 --> 00:56:06,200
Speaker 1: the podcast. Thank you for being besties. Thank you to

1276
00:56:06,280 --> 00:56:08,759
Speaker 1: the person who came to the girls at Starbucks this

1277
00:56:08,800 --> 00:56:10,680
Speaker 1: weekend and said, is this girl's chat live and then

1278
00:56:10,760 --> 00:56:14,359
Speaker 1: just left. It was the coolest driver. And shout out

1279
00:56:14,400 --> 00:56:16,759
Speaker 1: to Andrew, my new bestie friend at Whole Foods. I

1280
00:56:16,760 --> 00:56:19,240
Speaker 1: love you too. All right, Thank you guys for listening.

1281
00:56:19,239 --> 00:56:20,719
Speaker 1: We'll see you next time. It'll be good bye

1282
00:56:20,800 --> 00:56:21,759
Speaker 3: Bye you'll be good