Speaker 1: Start dat Up, Star Up Brooklyn by Start Up Brooklyn,
Speaker 1: buy that data. They're making Noise Data up. Episode on
Speaker 1: my birthday, Happy Birthday, Broody, Thank You Good Boys podcast. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I just want to get that out there now, throw
Speaker 1: out there because I'm working on my birthday for the people.
Speaker 1: You really are. I gotta say, I'm pretty shocked at
Speaker 1: your schedule for today. I'm like, dude, where's the let up?
Speaker 1: Where where you're usually? You're not gonna go home. You're
Speaker 1: not gonna do nothing that you gotta work for the people?
Speaker 1: Do you do? You don't really have to go I mean,
Speaker 1: I was kind of excited earlier when Elvis is like, dude, scary,
Speaker 1: your birthday's Monday. Take it off. My birthdays next Monday.
Speaker 1: So your birthdays today, why don't you take off for
Speaker 1: your prost? Of all, who's gonna hang out at seven
Speaker 1: am in the morning? That's redundant. But who's at seven o'clock?
Speaker 1: Who in the morning? Who's gonna what am I gonna
Speaker 1: do eight o'clock in the morning? Call my buds up, Hey,
Speaker 1: you want to hang out before you go to work?
Speaker 1: First of all, I don't have anyth that's my birthday
Speaker 1: I'm everybody. My kids are in school, my wife's at work.
Speaker 1: Where am I going? Let me do sleep late to work.
Speaker 1: I got a cake out of the deal under the
Speaker 1: twelve hours to go here you I mean, yeah, I
Speaker 1: have seven more hours for it worked for the Comedy
Speaker 1: Department parody. We could have did wrote Super Bowl songs yesterday.
Speaker 1: We could have done the podcast, and then you could
Speaker 1: have dipped. You didn't want to do that. Well, we
Speaker 1: haven't done the podcast yet, so after this podcast is over, well,
Speaker 1: if I did, you put your hand up on your hip.
Speaker 1: By the way, I feel like dip you're going into something.
Speaker 1: I feel that's the wrong choice of words for leaving.
Speaker 1: But that's what people say. I don't think that makes sense, though,
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, I gotta dip. No, that's like when you're
Speaker 1: like you when people say you luck out, but you're
Speaker 1: getting luck. No, you dip, you dip, You dip out
Speaker 1: of a place now, but you don't dip out of tips.
Speaker 1: You dip into the salur cream which I hate sing
Speaker 1: but I dip into the the uh, the salsa you
Speaker 1: dip into you know, dip out of sauce. You dip
Speaker 1: into sauce, right, But in this. But but when people
Speaker 1: say they're leaving a party, people say, people say ship.
Speaker 1: They make up phrases. That doesn't mean anything. It doesn't
Speaker 1: make it right. The problem with when someone says that
Speaker 1: they knocked out last night, they knocked out. Well, knocked
Speaker 1: out means you fell asleep. Yeah, you fell asleep. You
Speaker 1: you knocked out, you passed out somebody but you But
Speaker 1: you know. But your analogy to what I just said.
Speaker 1: If you know how the analogy game works, is you
Speaker 1: have to say something that knocked in. He was like, Oh,
Speaker 1: I was so tired. I was. I passed in. But
Speaker 1: you slept in. If I slept in, you slept out. Nope,
Speaker 1: you slept in. You slept in your bed. Sorry, I sorry,
Speaker 1: I slept in, meaning when you missed something. Yeah, I
Speaker 1: slept in. I slept in the house. I missed my
Speaker 1: alarm clock. Right, but you slept in. But dipping is in.
Speaker 1: You dip into things you can't dip out. Why not?
Speaker 1: That doesn't make any sense. You don't dive out of
Speaker 1: a pool. Hey, listen, I didn't create the terminology. People
Speaker 1: say it. I don't care what they say it. I
Speaker 1: have to go along with it. You make up all
Speaker 1: the words you want, they don't make. I still didn't
Speaker 1: make I'm still fighting against lucked out. Oh, man, you
Speaker 1: lucked out, you lucked out. That means you're out of luck.
Speaker 1: That's the opposite of what it means. Doesn't make any sense.
Speaker 1: You should looked in, man, you looked in, you locked in.
Speaker 1: You got a lot of luck. You you lucked in
Speaker 1: like the luck is in you. You got luck, and
Speaker 1: you're full of luck. You don't say you're empty of luck,
Speaker 1: out of luck, lucked out, out of luck, and lucked
Speaker 1: out of the complete opposites of each, and they shouldn't be.
Speaker 1: I locked out, I'm out, I'm out out of luck.
Speaker 1: You look into things way too much. If you check out,
Speaker 1: you're out right checking out right. You go into a hotel,
Speaker 1: you check in, true checking you check out right. So
Speaker 1: if you you luck in, you shouldn't be luck out.
Speaker 1: Doesn't make sense. You can dip out of a party
Speaker 1: the same way you're checking out of a hotel. You
Speaker 1: I'm checked out, man, I'm keeping out. You're you flicked out.
Speaker 1: You could flick out like I'm flicking myself out. So
Speaker 1: let's create something new and just did I just did?
Speaker 1: You just heard me create something with flicking. Flicking. You're
Speaker 1: flicking out, yeah, because like you know, when you flick something,
Speaker 1: it's like flim out. I'm done. You flick a bugger,
Speaker 1: you flick a little chip on the table. I'm flicking out.
Speaker 1: That makes more sense, Yo, let's flick that. We should
Speaker 1: start that. I think we just did. We just flick.
Speaker 1: But I like to be like, we should come up
Speaker 1: with something that's a great idea, scary, just to cover
Speaker 1: something else. I told you, did I talk about that
Speaker 1: that I would try In the in the nineties, I
Speaker 1: tried to create a phrase. Didn't work. Phrase was like
Speaker 1: when like a girl's like on your ship, like John
Speaker 1: your k so they're bothering you, like people on your
Speaker 1: on your case like I was like, So my phrase
Speaker 1: was get off the jeans, like get away from my pants.
Speaker 1: Don't look at my just get off the jeans. Get
Speaker 1: off you, get off the jeans. Like in other words,
Speaker 1: you're too close, you're on me, you're on my strap,
Speaker 1: you're on my you're trying to get on my on
Speaker 1: my sounds like you're mash debating under your clothes. Get
Speaker 1: off your genes, get off onto my jeans, getting off
Speaker 1: onto the genes. See now, would you say get on, like, oh,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna get on, get it on right? Get it
Speaker 1: on right? Is having sex? Right? Let's get it on?
Speaker 1: No jerking off? You're getting on? Are you jerking on?
Speaker 1: You're jerking on and off? But what's the off part?
Speaker 1: You're jerking on something two motions. It's on, off, on, off. No,
Speaker 1: you're jerking. Your hand is on down. After you're jerking,
Speaker 1: your hand is on right, and then whatever happens at
Speaker 1: the end of that lands on something. Where's the off?
Speaker 1: There's no off? Doesn't make any sense to you either. No,
Speaker 1: I mean, listen, it makes a lot of sense to me.
Speaker 1: Get me wrong. I don't think about it. While I'm
Speaker 1: thinking about it, I'm just saying the term jerk off.
Speaker 1: It's like it's all jerked out. See jerk out would work?
Speaker 1: Jerk out was a song from the eighties. It was
Speaker 1: a bad fucking R and B song. Okay, but wouldn't
Speaker 1: you make no sense? Think about it? Jerk out? What'd
Speaker 1: you do? I jerked out? Jerked? Yeah, you jerked something.
Speaker 1: Something came out. You jerked out. Don't worry. I'm not
Speaker 1: looking for help from the outside because you're jerked empty, right,
Speaker 1: you don't jerk or you're not off anything. There's no
Speaker 1: there's no often jerk off. No, unless you're hit in
Speaker 1: the light switch with it. What's the off part? There's
Speaker 1: no off? Wow? Have you ever dip to go jerk off?
Speaker 1: You have a dip out the jerk off? I feel
Speaker 1: like it sounds like I would flick I would flick
Speaker 1: out to jerk out. We do that parties. This party
Speaker 1: is this party is uh parties for ship We should
Speaker 1: flick out? Okay, the what are the phrases are there
Speaker 1: that I hate? Ginormous? Hate it? You've wasted my time
Speaker 1: with ginormous because you took two words that meant ginormous,
Speaker 1: combined them together and created nothing new. Okay, No, you
Speaker 1: did because ginormous means it's bigger than both those words combined,
Speaker 1: so it's the largest. It's not bigger than both gigantic
Speaker 1: and enormous. So that would be like a like two
Speaker 1: times that that's ginormous both words. So if somebody's fat
Speaker 1: and chubby and I call him fubby, does that make
Speaker 1: them fatter? If they're at Do you have a problem
Speaker 1: with zero fox given? No? Because I don't give a
Speaker 1: fuck zero, Right, I don't get I don't give a fuck. Now,
Speaker 1: if you said I couldn't give a fuck, fine, But
Speaker 1: he said I could give a fuck, that's wrong. Then
Speaker 1: you could give a funk. If I don't, I don't
Speaker 1: give a fuck. Right. But if you say I could
Speaker 1: give a funk, that's the same as I could care less.
Speaker 1: If you If you said I could give a fuck,
Speaker 1: then okay, that means you you care enough to give
Speaker 1: a fuck. Okay, right? What about what about spilling the tea?
Speaker 1: Spilling the spill the tea. That's like, you know you
Speaker 1: have some I understand. The team means that some news
Speaker 1: or some gossip. I understand with some gossip. So you're
Speaker 1: spilling it right me? Hear it? Right? But if you
Speaker 1: were drinking the tea right, right, if you're spilling it,
Speaker 1: if I'm listening, I'm drinking it right. But if I
Speaker 1: but but if it was reversed, if you're like, dude,
Speaker 1: you got gossip, I'm gonna drink the tea. It doesn't
Speaker 1: make any sense. You want to spill it so the
Speaker 1: other person can see it. You want to spit it out,
Speaker 1: You want to vomit that tea out. Vomit the gossip.
Speaker 1: Vomit the gossip would be a good website. Vomit the gossip, right,
Speaker 1: my favorite muppet. By the way, remember vomit the gossip.
Speaker 1: You shook right now, I'm woke. You woke or you
Speaker 1: swoll I'm never swollen except when I'm jerking out, by
Speaker 1: the way. Okay, so so on this This is what
Speaker 1: happens plant another We didn't planet ship. No. People say
Speaker 1: when they're having a great day or they're like al
Speaker 1: that they arrive in a in a new country and
Speaker 1: it's a beautiful sunny day, or they're on the beach,
Speaker 1: they say, what a time to be alive? Well, well,
Speaker 1: shouldn't that be every time? I mean, it's not just
Speaker 1: today that it's a great time to be alive. I
Speaker 1: mean I would hope that a time to be alive
Speaker 1: would be any time you're breathing. Well, I would rather
Speaker 1: be alive than dead. But I think the point is, like,
Speaker 1: if I had to live any time in any decade,
Speaker 1: like this is a bit of time, Like you don't
Speaker 1: want to live during the time of the plague right now.
Speaker 1: I don't think anyone during the plague was going what
Speaker 1: a time right now? In China. Do you think that
Speaker 1: people with the masks? And by the way, is a
Speaker 1: picture in Today's Daily News in New York is in
Speaker 1: New York, and I'm sure if you google it you'll
Speaker 1: see it. You know, the water bottle jugs. They're cutting
Speaker 1: the bottles off the bottoms, I think, And they're wearing
Speaker 1: water jugs on their head with the open spout at
Speaker 1: the top like an antenna to cover their faces and
Speaker 1: they can breathe out the top. I think. I don't know.
Speaker 1: I didn't read the article. Don't tweat me. The point is,
Speaker 1: do you think those people with the bottles the water
Speaker 1: jugs on their head are going? By the way, that
Speaker 1: was me and a water bottle, not me making fun
Speaker 1: of an Asian accent. You snowflake bastards. By the way,
Speaker 1: can we talk about me Safonia for a second? Problem
Speaker 1: with that? I got the jingle allright. By the way,
Speaker 1: these are they loaded our studio with uts pretzels out
Speaker 1: of Philadelphia. By the way, that Philadelphia area Uts is
Speaker 1: a sponsor the Opstair Morning Show, not a sponsor in
Speaker 1: the Broken Boys podcast. So we used to play a
Speaker 1: game called Who's chewing those chips? Right? And whenever we
Speaker 1: had chips, we would run out too that. We would
Speaker 1: run down to the vending machine and play who's chewing
Speaker 1: those chips? Right? And someone would go and you'd have
Speaker 1: to guess which person on the show those chips? Right? Well,
Speaker 1: who's eat nuts? Who slurp nuts? Beginning by the seven
Speaker 1: going bat ship? Right now bat Ship. So the point
Speaker 1: was Uts came in and there's a rack here, but
Speaker 1: no joke. We'll put pictures up tomorrow on Friday one.
Speaker 1: It's like fifty flavors of US chips. We're not getting
Speaker 1: paid for this. I'm just telling the story, I promise.
Speaker 1: And so it looks like a grocery store set right.
Speaker 1: I mean you look at you walking into a grocery store.
Speaker 1: I mean it's filled with cheeseballs and kettle. I had
Speaker 1: no idea had this many flavors. They got a lot again,
Speaker 1: not a commercial chips. The point was, I said, I
Speaker 1: have an idea, why don't we play who's chewing those chips? Tomorrow?
Speaker 1: And I was told, now, too many people have me Safonia,
Speaker 1: and we'll get offended and hurt and they won't listen. Yeah,
Speaker 1: Safia is, by the way, is when you well let's
Speaker 1: put this way, and just were grossed out of what
Speaker 1: Brody just did, like like the oldest to the proble
Speaker 1: where you couldn't listen to it, then you have me.
Speaker 1: It's it's a real condition. Now phony is in the name,
Speaker 1: but it's a real thing, and I get it. I
Speaker 1: have sympathy for anyone that has anything wrong with them,
Speaker 1: but I feel like the world needs to go on occasionally.
Speaker 1: Yeah right, Like I know this peanut allergies, but I
Speaker 1: still want to eat peanut butter occasionally. Now, if you
Speaker 1: can't have airborne peanuts, I will not eat them around you.
Speaker 1: I totally get that, But Messafoni, I don't want you
Speaker 1: to turn the radio off. All right. So, but we
Speaker 1: have ten million people listening a ten million people. How
Speaker 1: many people, I don't know, but you know what, the
Speaker 1: fact that there's even one means that there's some snow
Speaker 1: Flix out there that will be offended. So we can't,
Speaker 1: but they'll be offended for the mesasa um from the
Speaker 1: Latin They're crazy to the max. My favorite cartoon back
Speaker 1: in the nineties, Wariens. Yeah, what if this someone who
Speaker 1: has who can't tolerate uh nationality names being mangled? Right?
Speaker 1: Now they're going a not nationality, but any kind of
Speaker 1: word like wordplay that people could snowflake us on us
Speaker 1: at any point at any time. We just gotta be
Speaker 1: very careful. You gotta be very careful about what we're saying.
Speaker 1: You can't very careful. Do not offend the snow flakes, Brodie,
Speaker 1: Come on, you know better. Now. I think that's your birthday.
Speaker 1: You should be able to do this on your birthday,
Speaker 1: at least, at the very least on your birthday. You
Speaker 1: should be able to at least say what's on your
Speaker 1: mind without anybody complaining. Can I recap speaking in fact,
Speaker 1: it's my birthday. Just every time I think about the
Speaker 1: word birthday, I think of I think it would happened
Speaker 1: to me in the first grade. So this is not
Speaker 1: gonna be about you. Well, you can go to you.
Speaker 1: I mean, it's my birthday, but birthday's Monday. I was
Speaker 1: just wondering, birthday's Monday. I wonder if you had any
Speaker 1: any embarrassing birthday moments or things that happened on your
Speaker 1: birthday that we just I guess not as bad as
Speaker 1: a story you're dying to tell, So go ahead. I'm
Speaker 1: not trying to tell anything I said, I'm gonna I
Speaker 1: wanted to recap slightly the rant and conversation we had
Speaker 1: on January thirty, Today's Elba Strand fifteen minute morning show.
Speaker 1: We talked about how I couldn't get reservations from my
Speaker 1: and my wife's birthday. We have our birthday's, Melissa. My
Speaker 1: wife's birthday is the same as yours, and so my
Speaker 1: birthdays today and so the day that's equidistant roughly Saturday, right,
Speaker 1: it's two days going back, right, right. So I wanted
Speaker 1: dinner reservations at a restaurant three weeks ago, and they're like,
Speaker 1: we have nothing we can do. We can do like
Speaker 1: four thirty pm roughly or nine o'clock o'clock. So I
Speaker 1: hit them up on social media. No response. A lot
Speaker 1: of our slices love you guys, they all tweeted at
Speaker 1: this restaurant. No response. I'm gonna call them right now.
Speaker 1: I d M them, no response. I'm gonna call them.
Speaker 1: You're not gonna call him. You have the number ready,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna call him right now. On pot. I don't
Speaker 1: think we should call them right now. I was gonna
Speaker 1: be my birthday present to you, making you a reservation
Speaker 1: for a steak paid for. Yeah, we don't get credit
Speaker 1: for that. No, I mean, I'm gonna make you steak
Speaker 1: dinner reservation. So we got a couple of text messages
Speaker 1: today on the on the Big Show, and they said, well,
Speaker 1: if Scary takes you out of steak dinner for your birthday,
Speaker 1: does that count as your steak dinner? And I said, no,
Speaker 1: that would be my birthday steak dinner. It doesn't matter.
Speaker 1: They know. Everybody knows they listen to the morning show.
Speaker 1: I just they're not going to be there at twelve o'clock.
Speaker 1: You don't think so, not on Thursday. I think we
Speaker 1: should find out what Right now, people listening on a
Speaker 1: on a Saturday night, they're listening to this podcast at
Speaker 1: eight o'clock. They're like, why why can't you call now
Speaker 1: it's Saturday at o'clock because that's not when we recorded. Okay,
Speaker 1: we want to put them on. Yeah, I feel awkward
Speaker 1: about it. Why not? You're not gonna pull the Elvis
Speaker 1: Rand card, are you. I'm gonna do what I need
Speaker 1: to do to get you and your reservation in there.
Speaker 1: Might if not, we already have dinner plans at an
Speaker 1: equally wonderful restling those are cancellable. I don't need to cancel.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna beg to get into a good thing and
Speaker 1: give me dirty looks. See this is what you would say,
Speaker 1: they'll spit my food. And thank you for calling Rails,
Speaker 1: New Jersey's premier steak Please press one rail for our dress.
Speaker 1: Press three. This sounds like a sex pressure. Did you
Speaker 1: remain on the line because I can't response. You can't
Speaker 1: press buttons. You press everybody's button. God, thank you for
Speaker 1: calling Rails Steakhouse, steakhouse. And how my sister Allison, how
Speaker 1: are you? Um? This is pretty good. Thanks, I'm doing
Speaker 1: well today. To um, this is scary Jones. I'm with
Speaker 1: the Elvis Duran Morning Show in New York City. How
Speaker 1: are you doing? Okay, I'm doing okay. I promise this
Speaker 1: is not a phone tap. I swear to God, but
Speaker 1: I want I swear. I wanted to do a favor
Speaker 1: for a friend. Uh who's on the show, you know,
Speaker 1: David Brody on our morning shop. I think I've heard
Speaker 1: of his name. Okay, you know, you know he's been
Speaker 1: trying to get he's been trying to get a reservation
Speaker 1: for four people to the steakhouse for Saturday, and uh,
Speaker 1: because it's it's his birthday and his wife's birthday. They
Speaker 1: having a double birthday. And he he called you guys
Speaker 1: about maybe three four weeks ago and all of it,
Speaker 1: and they found out then that there was no reservations
Speaker 1: really available, uh during a prime time for Saturday night.
Speaker 1: But I figured I would give it one last ditch
Speaker 1: effort to see if maybe something might have come available.
Speaker 1: I know you guys have cancelations. People change their mind,
Speaker 1: that happens. Yeah, is there a way that we can
Speaker 1: get him in there. He's not looking for a free
Speaker 1: ride or anything like that. He was just looking for
Speaker 1: a reservation for four at a prime time. And when
Speaker 1: is the ad? It's this Saturday night. By the way,
Speaker 1: you guys, I know you're pretty popular place. But why
Speaker 1: I'm kind of curious why, uh why is it so
Speaker 1: full this specific Saturday or is that just every Saturday?
Speaker 1: Basically every Saturday, every Friday? Right? You guys have you
Speaker 1: have the secret sauce right there? I don't know, it's
Speaker 1: just speak easy and just the atmosphere, yeh um rafters right? Okay,
Speaker 1: So yeah, so he's been tweeting at you guys, do
Speaker 1: you guys check your social media. Um, yes, they do
Speaker 1: check their social media. Yes, who's the social media person? Um?
Speaker 1: I believe it's Pat who check us to social media? Pat?
Speaker 1: All right, well Pat, Pat's been ignoring every every everybody.
Speaker 1: I got listeners. We've talked about this at nausea um
Speaker 1: our listeners have been trying to get through to you guys,
Speaker 1: and and and tweeting at at you guys on social
Speaker 1: media everything like crazy and it was, and nobody's respond
Speaker 1: nobody's in responding. He's even DMed you guys to say, hey,
Speaker 1: please help me out. Oh really okay, right, so what
Speaker 1: do you so? What what do you? What do you think? Um?
Speaker 1: Just when me? Please? You on hold? Okay, okay, thank you?
Speaker 1: Right now, I want to talk like I'm like I'm
Speaker 1: if she recognized the different voice right in to Waco,
Speaker 1: New Jersey. I just got your reservation social welcome. You're welcome,
Speaker 1: and that's your stick. No it's not does not count. No,
Speaker 1: it's all the problem having with my Alexa. Good afternoon,
Speaker 1: rail stickhouse. Mike speak him out. Hey, Mike, I was
Speaker 1: on hold, young lady. You was helping me, uh put
Speaker 1: me on hold? Did she pass along my call to you.
Speaker 1: You know what, it automatically rings down to the office here.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, Oh that's okay, Well, maybe I can help you.
Speaker 1: My name is David. Uh. I was been trying for
Speaker 1: a number of weeks to get a reservation for this Saturday. Uh.
Speaker 1: And the only times that were like it was like
Speaker 1: four or forty five and like ten o'clock at night,
Speaker 1: and I was just seeing if anything was available. I've
Speaker 1: I've tweeted you guys a bunch of times. I haven't
Speaker 1: heard back. I d M your account, I didn't nobody
Speaker 1: got back. I don't know if anybody runs you social media.
Speaker 1: But yeah, actually actually for this this past week, actually
Speaker 1: the persons in Mexico on vacation. But because I had
Speaker 1: like thirty people tweet at you and uh Saturdays. Uh yeah.
Speaker 1: The best way to get ahold of this is obviously
Speaker 1: through our through our website or just call. Yeah. No,
Speaker 1: I did call it, but I figured, you know, try
Speaker 1: social also, you know. Yeah, I know, we haven't. I know,
Speaker 1: Saturday has been been really busy. How many people it's four?
Speaker 1: See here here's the thing. What's your name, sir. I'm
Speaker 1: sorry to bother you. Mike, Hey, Mike. Sorry, it's my
Speaker 1: birthday today. A. And it's my wife's birthday Monday, thank
Speaker 1: you very much. And my wife her birthday's Monday. We're
Speaker 1: so Saturday is right in the middle, and Rails is
Speaker 1: her favorite restaurant, and so she said pick a place,
Speaker 1: and I said, let's go to Rails, because she goes
Speaker 1: there all the time and I have not been there yet.
Speaker 1: And every time she goes with a friend, she's like, oh,
Speaker 1: we gotta go, we gotta go. So it was my
Speaker 1: job to call three weeks ago and get a reservation,
Speaker 1: and I have been unable to do that. Can I
Speaker 1: figure it as we get closer, I give it a shot,
Speaker 1: all right, we'll getting closer hard. Three weeks ago A
Speaker 1: three weeks ago. Yeah, they told me you've locked up
Speaker 1: late and early. Let me just I'm just opening up
Speaker 1: the reservation system now. Thanks. So only only are so
Speaker 1: you only have the one guy checking the socials. That's
Speaker 1: too bad. Um, Let me spend some time work seeing
Speaker 1: if I can't move stuff around. Let me see what
Speaker 1: I can do. I'll give you a call back. That
Speaker 1: would be great. Mike, appreciate it, all right, take care?
Speaker 1: All right? Okay, by the way, I got news for you.
Speaker 1: She transferred the call or the call bounced to him
Speaker 1: without the Elvis Duran show and Scary Jones magic touch.
Speaker 1: That's what happened there. Well not, Well, the problem is
Speaker 1: you got this guy on the phone, but I'm not
Speaker 1: gonna tell him she's from. Maybe you still go to him,
Speaker 1: Maybe she'll tell him now. Yeah, well I guess the
Speaker 1: two are gonna now talk. But she he clearly don't know.
Speaker 1: He clearly didn't know. She was like, I've heard the name,
Speaker 1: so she was smiling. I heard it in her voice.
Speaker 1: But here's the thing. If they get me a table
Speaker 1: not knowing where I work, and I don't we're working here,
Speaker 1: I shouldn't get a table for that. I know it's
Speaker 1: a bill because it's your birthday. Yes, absolutely, that's why
Speaker 1: it's a double birthday, right that being said, And by
Speaker 1: the way, you're gonna pay full price. Of course, it's
Speaker 1: not like you're hanging with me. Yeah. If I get
Speaker 1: it and they make room for me, that means there
Speaker 1: was room. Not really, unless they put us up against
Speaker 1: the next table so close that you don't that you
Speaker 1: want to die. You didn't allow me to make the connection.
Speaker 1: I can't allow you because that got no, because you
Speaker 1: want to scary that guy. Okay, can we can we
Speaker 1: tell the Brooklyn Boys audience what you did? I said
Speaker 1: on the fifty minute morning show. Uh, Scary called up
Speaker 1: a restaurant years so it's right. That changes everything because
Speaker 1: it was years ago. Scary called up a restaurant to
Speaker 1: make reservations for Elvis Duran plus one. Right, he gets
Speaker 1: to the restaurant. It was never for Elvis durand was
Speaker 1: for Scary and his girlfriend. He gets here and he
Speaker 1: says checking in for Albus durand h plus one. They go, oh, uh,
Speaker 1: you don't Alvis Durrand. No, I was his plus one,
Speaker 1: but Elvis is sick tonight, so I brought a plus one.
Speaker 1: But I was on the reservation all time. I was
Speaker 1: the plus one. They were like, oh yeah, all right, okay,
Speaker 1: well here's the problem with that. My girlfriend and I
Speaker 1: were celebrating an anniversary and I will go to any
Speaker 1: length to get the table in the hot restaurant because
Speaker 1: that's the restaurant that we wanted to go to. Restaurant restaurant.
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, but you lied and said you amas trying.
Speaker 1: See what you did here was I had to get
Speaker 1: I had to use the power of the show this time.
Speaker 1: Just now, well I use my own name this right,
Speaker 1: But you said you're from this show. Dropped the name.
Speaker 1: But what you from somewhere right right? But what you
Speaker 1: did last time was you claim to be the man himself.
Speaker 1: Well that was years ago. You bat you bait and
Speaker 1: switch them, is what you did. I needed to get
Speaker 1: that res that was for It was for an an anniversary.
Speaker 1: It was a special occasion. I will go through any
Speaker 1: length speaking of reservations. But hold on, I'm I want
Speaker 1: to just say that one other thing that you know,
Speaker 1: you know and I do. He uses everybody uses something
Speaker 1: to get ahead, but nobody calls us like, hey, I'm
Speaker 1: Mike from Do you know how many people will call
Speaker 1: a restaurant that it's impossible to get into, and they
Speaker 1: will they will use someone to call it, and then
Speaker 1: they'll they'll they'll add on, oh, and I'm a doctor,
Speaker 1: oh and on a lawyer or because if you add
Speaker 1: these suffixes to your name or whatever or some kind
Speaker 1: of a prefix, the suffix and the doctor no doctors,
Speaker 1: no no. At the end, you have a like you
Speaker 1: want to don to tag your your PhD something PhD
Speaker 1: at the end, nobody PhD fix suffix. You will give
Speaker 1: that stuff because it will resonate and no and you
Speaker 1: it will get you the table over the quote. Person
Speaker 1: that doesn't have the edge, I'm just gonna say, the
Speaker 1: common person. And unfortunately every here's the thing to think about.
Speaker 1: Everyone has an edge if they think about it, and
Speaker 1: they can use that edge to get ahead. And that's
Speaker 1: my advice to everybody listening to this podcast. I'm saying
Speaker 1: that it just happens to be. I'm on a radio show.
Speaker 1: I'm just saying that we're possible. I'm just saying, you love.
Speaker 1: What if that restaurant that you lied two years ago,
Speaker 1: what if someone was like, you know what? Uh, I
Speaker 1: was gonna call it sick. I don't really feel well,
Speaker 1: but I heard Elvis Durrand's coming for dinner tonight. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna come in even though I don't feel well. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna come and work. And then Elvis doesn't come in,
Speaker 1: well they shouldn't. That that's they have ill intentions. Intentions Alvis. Now, listen,
Speaker 1: my money is just as good as anyone else's dollar.
Speaker 1: But dollar, your Instagram photo is not as valuable as Elvis's.
Speaker 1: It doesn't matter. My my money is just as good
Speaker 1: as his. Hey, what are you pitching about? I just
Speaker 1: almost got you. I think I got you that reservation
Speaker 1: you almost did. That girl was like Elvis Durant, Why
Speaker 1: he didn't know squat about Deadley is what she didn't.
Speaker 1: She thought she was being phone taps. She was kicking
Speaker 1: you know what she did? She got She took the phone.
Speaker 1: She's like, I'll be right back, and she flicked out
Speaker 1: of that conversation. She flicked out. She flicked it, She
Speaker 1: flicked it right out. She flicked out. What are you hitting? Buttons? Buttons?
Speaker 1: Commercial break? Oh, so we'll be right back after this. Yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: I want to say give a shout out to Vinny
Speaker 1: from City Bank, who's day of this week. I was,
Speaker 1: I don't know, three minutes late, so the show had
Speaker 1: just started. So i have my Heart Radio on my
Speaker 1: phone and I'm listening to the beginning of the show.
Speaker 1: So technically I'm like four minutes late because with the
Speaker 1: late on my heart and I'm walking down the street
Speaker 1: listening with the I Heart Radio app, no no headphones,
Speaker 1: just in my in my pocket loud as. I'm walking
Speaker 1: down the cold street and this guy walks by and
Speaker 1: he goes, hey, brother, it's done like that. Hey, it's gone, man.
Speaker 1: He says, uh, it's me Vinny. And I looked at me,
Speaker 1: go Vinny. And then he told me who he was
Speaker 1: on on social media and I said, oh, Vinny, I
Speaker 1: know him from social media. So he says, I'm listening
Speaker 1: right now. I said, then you must know I'm late.
Speaker 1: The show already started. I got I gotta run. He
Speaker 1: was going to the opposite direction I was. So he says, nah,
Speaker 1: listening to Brooklyn Boys to the show the air right.
Speaker 1: I said, put the show is on. He goes, I
Speaker 1: get it later. I'm listening to the episodehere you guys
Speaker 1: in bb REXA. I go, that's all you're up to.
Speaker 1: He goes, no, I'm looping. He's looping. So that's looping around.
Speaker 1: He hoped it so today, Uh hold on, hold on,
Speaker 1: hold on a second. This is Patty pat day, young up.
Speaker 1: Patty was calling and wish me happy birthday. You know
Speaker 1: Patty from the record label. Gotta be nice to the
Speaker 1: record label. Guys. Patty's the best bet. He never forgets
Speaker 1: my birthday. He calls everybody. He calls everybody. Call you again. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: he's gonna come again. Okay. So today I'm running fifteen
Speaker 1: minutes early. So I'm walking down the same street. There's
Speaker 1: no way you can run into the same guy. Vinny
Speaker 1: walks by me again at so okay, he goes, I go,
Speaker 1: you got the show on? Hees because we weren't on yet.
Speaker 1: He goes, No, I'm I got the Brooklyn Boys on.
Speaker 1: That's my walk. So he walks. It works at City Bank,
Speaker 1: a couple of blocks from here, west or whatever. So
Speaker 1: if you've got a seven minute walk, but here's my thing.
Speaker 1: Yesterday I'm four or five minutes late. Today I'm fifteen
Speaker 1: minutes early. Is he waiting on the corner and then
Speaker 1: as I come he starts to walk. Is he just
Speaker 1: waiting for me? No, there's no way. There's no way.
Speaker 1: Like I may show up tomorrow an hour late and
Speaker 1: see if he's there. It was a cool sidens really
Speaker 1: the exact same time, two days in a row. Definitely.
Speaker 1: I feel like he's like, Wow, I know how Brody
Speaker 1: gets down Pad. I don't know. I like Vinnie, but
Speaker 1: I feel like if I bump in him tomorrow at
Speaker 1: a random time, something's up, you should come in an
Speaker 1: hour early. Tomorrow. I just said hour late. It's the
Speaker 1: same thing. But yeah, see if my point is I'm
Speaker 1: not Yeah, I just experiment when I come and see
Speaker 1: if he's there waiting, comes waiting on the corner an
Speaker 1: hour early. Okay I just said. I just said an
Speaker 1: hour later, because then I get to be late and
Speaker 1: it always yells at me. I can go. I was.
Speaker 1: If you really want to research, and you really want
Speaker 1: to experiment, you think he's getting there. Four come in
Speaker 1: all arbitrary times. You come in an hour early one day,
Speaker 1: and come in minutes the next day, next day, fifteen
Speaker 1: minutes right, exactly right? How many days in a row?
Speaker 1: Leave them, put your headphones down, Go walk to corner
Speaker 1: right now. If he's there. If he is there, I
Speaker 1: guess what. Well, he's not gonna be waiting for me
Speaker 1: to walk in that direction because I'm already here. He's
Speaker 1: he'll be. So the question is how many days qualifies
Speaker 1: for stalk? It's three days. Stalk is three days unbelievable.
Speaker 1: I think three days is an unbelievable quincide, four days
Speaker 1: of stalk, four days of stalk at four different times.
Speaker 1: What if I take what if I walk a different
Speaker 1: way to work and he still bumps into me. What
Speaker 1: if he comes up I never have known. What if
Speaker 1: he comes up from behind me? What if he's by
Speaker 1: the garage? If he pops out of a man hole,
Speaker 1: that's what I'm What if he's in the backseat of
Speaker 1: my car and then he dips that's a stalk. Then
Speaker 1: I'll flick him out and flick him out like him out.
Speaker 1: I think, flick out hash take flick out, dude, I
Speaker 1: that was that a terrible party last night? Had to
Speaker 1: flick out a jerk out? Jut? I wouldn't he would
Speaker 1: do that before you leave? Right? You do it after?
Speaker 1: That would be crazy. Imagine somebody just starts jerking out
Speaker 1: in the middle of the party. Imagine that's the only
Speaker 1: way to leave. Imagine that's the entertainment, right, you can't
Speaker 1: leave you haven't jerked out, all right? Think about it? Okay,
Speaker 1: isn't a blowjob to suck job? Like people? Okay, people
Speaker 1: tap out? Right? But that's what you say. Blow job
Speaker 1: is really a such job? Yeah, I have a blowjob story.
Speaker 1: Remind me, let's go there right now. But people do
Speaker 1: tap out, and the same thing is dipping out. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but tap out is a wrestling term, you tap your
Speaker 1: partner so you can get out the other person's tapping in.
Speaker 1: You don't tap out to go in the ring. You
Speaker 1: tap out to leave the ring. Dude, I'm dropping wrestling
Speaker 1: knowledge on you. This podcast has everything we really do.
Speaker 1: By the way, that's gonna be a Brooklyn Boys. Uh
Speaker 1: quote from the Brooklyn Boys quote? Guy on Twitter? Did
Speaker 1: you see have you've been following it? He's hilarious. Well
Speaker 1: you know what, No, wait a minute. If a guy
Speaker 1: puts up quotes from our show, aren't we hilarious? No,
Speaker 1: he's hilarious because he found it and capsualized it, transcribed
Speaker 1: it and capsualized and capsulate encapsulated it. Yeah, it's not
Speaker 1: capsulized encapsulated it. And yeah he gets the credit. There
Speaker 1: was a couple here on my phone here where uh
Speaker 1: was a quote favorite episode? Yeah? So Uh. Brodie tells
Speaker 1: his thoughts on Thanksgiving raps having Mayo episode seventy nine
Speaker 1: at the Sevree Mark Uh says, quote to me, at,
Speaker 1: David Brodie, you tell me where in the history books
Speaker 1: did the Pilgrims come to Americo? Mayonnaise? How dare you
Speaker 1: put mayonnaise in a Thanksgiving rap bullshit, so stuff like that. Uh,
Speaker 1: if you follow it daily Brooklyn Boys quotes on Twitter. Yeah, yeah, okay.
Speaker 1: Do you want to hear the blow jobs? Stay? I
Speaker 1: want to hear it yet, please because in the meantime
Speaker 1: there's a very funny comedian. Or do you have to
Speaker 1: call her a comic because actresses are now actors. You
Speaker 1: could call her comic or comic stand up comics. She's
Speaker 1: either way, it works. She's stand up comic. Quest she's
Speaker 1: a she. Uh, you know what, I don't know she
Speaker 1: identifies the woman she says, I just want to be careful.
Speaker 1: She may have another I believe. I believe she is
Speaker 1: a woman who identifies as a woman. All that she's
Speaker 1: a comedian or an actor. I can't whatever it is. Anyway,
Speaker 1: she does a one woman show, or if she identifies
Speaker 1: as a woman, one woman show. Uh, it's produced by
Speaker 1: Natasha Leone. Everybody loves Natasha Leone. The show is called
Speaker 1: Get on Your Knees Now. I saw her as a
Speaker 1: guest on seth Meyers on Colbert on Fallon promoting this
Speaker 1: show to one woman show eighty minutes long and the
Speaker 1: show it's an off Broadway show and the whole show
Speaker 1: is about herror life as a young woman as a virgin,
Speaker 1: and her experiences with giving her first blow job, being
Speaker 1: afraid to give her first one, and then how she
Speaker 1: progressed in life and got better at it to pride
Speaker 1: in it scared guys off, but it's it's very well crafted,
Speaker 1: it's very funny. It's a great show. So I mentioned
Speaker 1: my friend Jeff a bunch of times on the podcast.
Speaker 1: I say, Jeff, Friday night, why don't we just go
Speaker 1: to this show. I don't know. I don't know anyth
Speaker 1: about it. I don't I don't know. I said, I
Speaker 1: heard good things. She's very funny. Let's go to the show. Okay, alright, fine,
Speaker 1: we'll go. We had dinner. We went to a place
Speaker 1: called Emmetts. It's been Emmetts, I have not I've heard
Speaker 1: about it. So Emmetts is a place in New York
Speaker 1: City Manhattan here that serves deep Dish pizza Chicago style
Speaker 1: deep dish pizza. Okay, so we're like, hey, I really
Speaker 1: like deep dish pizza. You know, you really can't get
Speaker 1: deep Dish other than going to Juno's in New York.
Speaker 1: There's not a lot of places to serve it. So
Speaker 1: we went there. It's not far from where we're going
Speaker 1: to see the show. They put us to the table
Speaker 1: next to so it's a converted store like it looks
Speaker 1: like it used to be an apartment but now it's
Speaker 1: like a store front off the street. Open the door
Speaker 1: and there's the tables right off the sidewalk. So the
Speaker 1: front is all glass windows and doors, all glass Florida ceiling.
Speaker 1: We sit next to a table table by the window,
Speaker 1: which is like right off the sidewalk, and there's cork.
Speaker 1: So it was like it was what do you call us? Like? Um,
Speaker 1: the windows that open on hinges like double windows, they're
Speaker 1: like shutters, but their windows they're shutting. They're closed, and
Speaker 1: they have cork closing the gap between them bottom sides.
Speaker 1: In the middle the cold has worn that away, so
Speaker 1: the cold air is just shooting through the glass, shooting
Speaker 1: right through it. So there's tables next to us. There's
Speaker 1: a fore top and a two top, but the two
Speaker 1: top is next to really loud, obnoxious people. So I
Speaker 1: say the guy, can we take the fore top? I
Speaker 1: don't want to take away your fore top because the
Speaker 1: two top was sitting at his a round table like
Speaker 1: Sidel's fox sidel's full, so we can't move. So we're
Speaker 1: sitting there. We tell him. He goes, oh, man, look
Speaker 1: at that the corks coming off. Oh my god, I
Speaker 1: feel terrible. People get up. We moved tables with that.
Speaker 1: Another couple that looks like their work friends. They go
Speaker 1: and sit at the table we were at. They take
Speaker 1: the coats off and we're laughing. Now we're like, they're
Speaker 1: gonna sit at the cold table, frozen off their asses, right, nothing.
Speaker 1: They don't complain, they don't say a word. Now we
Speaker 1: look like the assholes because we were cold, Like maybe
Speaker 1: we're not maybe weren't cold. Maybe we'll maybe we're just
Speaker 1: like catchy, Like, how did I not cold? I don't know.
Speaker 1: The wind is whistling through the door, like it's coming
Speaker 1: through the window. Everyone has a different threshold. I guess.
Speaker 1: All right, So the pizza comes. It's delicious, all right,
Speaker 1: But if you've ever had deep dish, bless you the
Speaker 1: deep dish. How would you describe deep dish pizza? Not
Speaker 1: a definition of what it is. Describe it in terms
Speaker 1: of the height of the cross the middle pot. Maybe
Speaker 1: you got an inch of two inches, an inch and
Speaker 1: a half of of of crust, and the middle it's
Speaker 1: a pillowy it's a pillowy, fluffy thing going on in there.
Speaker 1: And then on the middle part is you know, you've
Speaker 1: got some cheese and you've got some sauce on the
Speaker 1: top of that, and with what maybe more? Have you
Speaker 1: never had deep dish pizza. It's toppings you okay, pan,
Speaker 1: it's in a square black around comes around und all right, right,
Speaker 1: deep but deep Chicago. Yeah, So deep dish pizza like
Speaker 1: a two inch rust and maybe and here's the thing.
Speaker 1: The inside passed. The crust is about an inch and
Speaker 1: a half inch and three quarters it's almost as high
Speaker 1: as the deep crust correct, and it's loaded like a lasagna, bread, cheese, meat, sauce,
Speaker 1: really thick. The pizza emmetts delicious. The crust is really high.
Speaker 1: It looks great. The middle about as thick as a
Speaker 1: regular slice of pizza. It was like deep crust pizza.
Speaker 1: But the pizza wasn't like I don't know if it
Speaker 1: was ever up. I don't know if it was like
Speaker 1: the weight of the sauce and it sunk. It was
Speaker 1: a meat lover's but it was a sin. The crust
Speaker 1: was went high. But when then you could look into it.
Speaker 1: It was like a crater. It was like a crater.
Speaker 1: That's terrible. It's like a bowl of soup. That's and
Speaker 1: so we were looking at it all the tables, going
Speaker 1: was as was that was that what we're looking and now?
Speaker 1: So then so then Mike Jeff says to me, you
Speaker 1: can't complain. We already complained about the call. Old. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you already got your your red flag. I got my
Speaker 1: red flag. I got to it on the table, already
Speaker 1: moved tables, so I couldn't say anything because it was
Speaker 1: also delicious, but three dollars bottle of soda, no refills?
Speaker 1: All right, but where's the where's the bad part? No,
Speaker 1: the bad part is it wasn't deep dish pizza. Okay,
Speaker 1: you're no. They do one thing there. They sell deep
Speaker 1: dish pizza, so they're not a deep dish pizza deep.
Speaker 1: But it wasn't filled. It was like a pot. It
Speaker 1: was a deep crater pizza. That's what I'm saying. Okay,
Speaker 1: So and and then the wind okay, so what what
Speaker 1: did you have to do with someone giving a blowjob?
Speaker 1: I'm getting there. The dinner was great. We walked to
Speaker 1: the theater. You take very long these days, maybe I
Speaker 1: should You should pop a see Alice, you want to
Speaker 1: do it? Viagara, don't be a jerk on? Okay? All right,
Speaker 1: God called back, don't be a hashtag, don't be a
Speaker 1: jerk on. Okay. So we go to the show, and
Speaker 1: you know, I don't really care. I didn't look into
Speaker 1: the show. I didn't read reviews. But of the audience
Speaker 1: is twenty thirty something young women. Okay, good place to
Speaker 1: go to pick up a girl who's into blowjobs. This show, okay.
Speaker 1: The rest of the crowd looked like very flamboyant gay men, couples, gays,
Speaker 1: and then us. How do you know that these weren't lesbian?
Speaker 1: The women, I don't know. I'm just telling. I didn't
Speaker 1: say they were straight, but they were at a blowjob show. Uh.
Speaker 1: You know, By the way, do you want to review
Speaker 1: the show? Yes, I'm gonna review the show. We're walking
Speaker 1: down the street in the village reminded me of a
Speaker 1: joke one of my favorite comics from years ago, Greg
Speaker 1: ro Gall great very funny comic. He was talking about
Speaker 1: how his friend is so stupid and he's like, he
Speaker 1: says the dumbest things. He's walking down the street with
Speaker 1: him in the in the Greenwich village of Manhattan, and
Speaker 1: he turns to Greg ro gall And and turning to
Speaker 1: the story, and he says, you know, when you see
Speaker 1: two guys walking together in the village, they're gay. And
Speaker 1: then he says to his friend, we're we're walking down
Speaker 1: the street, like doesn't make any sense, right, So I
Speaker 1: can't assume that every two guys in the theater was
Speaker 1: gay because I was with my buddy and we're not correct,
Speaker 1: But it looked like from the hand holding that we
Speaker 1: were in a maybe we were the only ones in
Speaker 1: that whole theater that are not not in the business
Speaker 1: or have the experience of giving blow jobs. So we
Speaker 1: we see the show. I'm laughing the whole show, but
Speaker 1: because I talked him into going. Throughout the show, I'm
Speaker 1: looking over at him, going is he smiling? Isn't a
Speaker 1: good time and he hasn't look on his face like
Speaker 1: it's amusing. Yeah. I hear him chuckle once or twice,
Speaker 1: and I assume he's chuckling a lot, but I only
Speaker 1: heard it once or twice. I laughed out loud a
Speaker 1: couple of times. He didn't like it nearly as much,
Speaker 1: but we walk out, and I like, how good was that?
Speaker 1: I hated it? What I hated it? Yeah, I don't.
Speaker 1: I just I don't. So now you're gonna you're gonna
Speaker 1: pay for his ticket. So hold on, no, why not?
Speaker 1: He didn't have you invited him into this experience. Maybe
Speaker 1: you could up now I'm not doing that. I'm not sure.
Speaker 1: Maybe I don't like female comics. I don't know. I
Speaker 1: don't know. The whole thing was drawing out. It should
Speaker 1: have been shorter, it could have been funnier in forty minutes.
Speaker 1: It was eighty minutes twenty. So I was like, all right, man, listen,
Speaker 1: I'm sorry to like it. I really enjoyed it. I
Speaker 1: thought this part was great. That part was great. I
Speaker 1: thought a delivery was fantastic. She's she's very pretty. It
Speaker 1: was just an amusing show to watch. It was just good. Okay.
Speaker 1: So he drives home and in the car right, He's like, yeah, man,
Speaker 1: the pizza was good at a good time. Tonight was
Speaker 1: fun night out, you know, away from the family. Whatever.
Speaker 1: I gotta tell you, I really didn't enjoy the show.
Speaker 1: I'm like, no, I get it. I yep, got it.
Speaker 1: You didn't like the show. Fine, Okay, at this point,
Speaker 1: that's enough. Right, you'd get it. I would get it.
Speaker 1: I'm like, all right, great, I struck out on this right,
Speaker 1: I was wrong. And I said to him, I feel
Speaker 1: bad I brought you out. He but he kept he
Speaker 1: kept keeping on. The next day he sends me, he
Speaker 1: sends me links to three articles that reviewed the show
Speaker 1: it didn't like the show, that said it was too long,
Speaker 1: too many the same jokes. You know what it sounds
Speaker 1: like to me, Brodie sounds like he's trying to get
Speaker 1: some free dessert at it. Yes, that's what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: So I texted and I go, dude, don't do this again,
Speaker 1: or we're not going anywhere ever, like and I got it, Like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I gotta stop. He needed to make you feel like
Speaker 1: a piece of ship. So I said, are you trying
Speaker 1: to make me feel like a piece of ship? Basically
Speaker 1: said he's like no, I just wanted you to know
Speaker 1: that other people think to what I do. I said, Well,
Speaker 1: he's watching it feel justified in his thoughts. He thought
Speaker 1: maybe he was what you said. The whole audience was
Speaker 1: going crazy right now. People liked it. I think if
Speaker 1: you're a young woman who can relate firsthand of the
Speaker 1: experience of the first time and then the second time
Speaker 1: and the all think it might hit home with you more, right.
Speaker 1: But she had some very funny like jokes about like
Speaker 1: what do you do with the balls? I don't I
Speaker 1: asked a woman who who said she was the queen
Speaker 1: of it, and she knew what She's just talking me,
Speaker 1: like lift them up a little bit, like it was funny,
Speaker 1: like her explaining like not knowing what to do and
Speaker 1: and what her thought process was during the first It's
Speaker 1: all very funny. He didn't find it funny, but three
Speaker 1: reviews like, oh, this one gave it a seventy nine,
Speaker 1: and uh, he would have thought would be fun. He
Speaker 1: thought he thought it sucked. He's like that. That's the
Speaker 1: exact point of the show blue right. I will say,
Speaker 1: like the restaurant where Pat who does social media for
Speaker 1: rails went to Mexico. My impression is that Jacqueline Novak
Speaker 1: went to Mexico because I tweeted at her, I love
Speaker 1: the show, I posted on Instagram. Nothing I followed her. Whatever,
Speaker 1: Jacquelinovac and Pat who let me tell you something, Pat
Speaker 1: went off the rails. That's right. Jacquelinovac is a very
Speaker 1: talented woman. But I have But she has like seventeen
Speaker 1: thousand followers on Twitter, which is a nice amount if
Speaker 1: you don't have a lot of followers. I've got a
Speaker 1: lot more than that, and I try to keep up
Speaker 1: with every tweet. What I'm saying is, I don't think
Speaker 1: she has so much that every seventeen every every one
Speaker 1: of those people is seventeen thousand tweets a day. Where
Speaker 1: she didn't see my tweet, I feel like I'm defending him,
Speaker 1: sticking up, I'm advertising for you. Tweet me back. Enjoyed
Speaker 1: the show, Hey, thanks glad you could make it. You
Speaker 1: know something, I'll blow your side and whatever. By the way,
Speaker 1: she did not say jerk on. I should have told
Speaker 1: her that in the tweet, right, yeah, A very least
Speaker 1: she could have said jerk out, jerk out, So my
Speaker 1: friend clearly wanted to flick out of that show. In
Speaker 1: the middle, you would have dipped. I would have dipped.
Speaker 1: I definitely would have dipped. You know me way too well.
Speaker 1: I know you're way too well. Um should we You
Speaker 1: said you had a thing. I got a lot of
Speaker 1: things I don't have. I have a couple of things.
Speaker 1: I mean, I got some things to reason. I wanted
Speaker 1: to follow up on something that was originally gonna bring
Speaker 1: up here on this podcast, but it came out on
Speaker 1: the fifteen minute morning show because Danielle made me so
Speaker 1: angry with it. Well yeah, but if you did it,
Speaker 1: you yelled after we stopped the podcast, You're like, should
Speaker 1: have saved it for the broad Book on Boys podcast.
Speaker 1: The point is, I was we were talking about shopping
Speaker 1: versus your shopping in person, versus having groceries come to you.
Speaker 1: Danielle prefers her groceries to come to her. But the
Speaker 1: one thing that I love most in life in going places.
Speaker 1: I mean, I you know me, I like, I'm a
Speaker 1: man of convenience. I like coming to me too, your
Speaker 1: couch guy. I love that. But when it comes to
Speaker 1: groceries and shopping, I need to do it for myself.
Speaker 1: And she called the bougie for that, but I think
Speaker 1: it's bougie to shop from your phone, so touche. However,
Speaker 1: I should have had the clip of you screaming when
Speaker 1: you yelled no, they give you bad produce on fresh.
Speaker 1: I went in his firsthand. I went to a Whole
Speaker 1: Foods a couple of weeks ago. I went to the
Speaker 1: Whole Foods a couple of days ago, and and I'm
Speaker 1: looking at all the shoppers shopping for people on their phone,
Speaker 1: like there's like a whole fleet of them that come
Speaker 1: in in the middle afternoon, and I see, I know
Speaker 1: that all these groceries are going to end up on
Speaker 1: some people's doorsteps. Well, they take no pride and no
Speaker 1: care in in shopping for people. They have their list
Speaker 1: on their phone and they run through the supermarket as
Speaker 1: fast as they can to get those orders fulfilled. They
Speaker 1: don't check the produce, they don't check sell by dates
Speaker 1: on things. You know, I want. The one time I
Speaker 1: got food on the milk from the back, I got
Speaker 1: cottage cheese that expired the next day. Like what the
Speaker 1: hell am I supposed to do with cottage cheese? Because
Speaker 1: because I know that when I'm there in person, I'm
Speaker 1: going behind. I'm going to the back of the display
Speaker 1: because that's where they put the new stock. The new
Speaker 1: stock is used when you go to the big stock.
Speaker 1: You go to Walmart, they have like a hundred milk
Speaker 1: out hundred jugs of milk. The ones that are fresh,
Speaker 1: you got the ones in the back. The guy just
Speaker 1: restocked because they put the freshest in the back. Just
Speaker 1: grab the ones in the back, right, there's no law
Speaker 1: against that. There's no Why do you want the milk
Speaker 1: that expires in four days? Get the one in the
Speaker 1: back the night when somebody else is doing the shopping
Speaker 1: and it's not their money front, they'll just grab what
Speaker 1: they grab and go, grabb and go. It's hapless, it's
Speaker 1: it's rushed. Sometimes they second milk has five or six
Speaker 1: extra days, and that's a cell by date. By the way,
Speaker 1: you have to be carefully. You don't confuse sell by
Speaker 1: with used by. Well, my girlfriend is it all the
Speaker 1: time with the used by date. She completely f stet up.
Speaker 1: She's like, oh no, she throws it away. I'm like,
Speaker 1: what are you doing? That's sell by? You still got
Speaker 1: another good week in this right. That means you're gonna
Speaker 1: they know you're gonna have the milk in your house
Speaker 1: for a week. You do the stiff test because they
Speaker 1: don't know how long you're gonna you're gonna open it up,
Speaker 1: leave it on the table. They just wanted out of
Speaker 1: this store before it goes bad. I just wanted to
Speaker 1: have peace of mind. I'm really done with this conversation.
Speaker 1: You go go to the fifteen minute morning show if
Speaker 1: you want to hear five people screaming at each other.
Speaker 1: It was good. It was like the Brooklyn Boys, but
Speaker 1: more people, with more people. Um, did I talk about signaling?
Speaker 1: Did I talk about that last week with what I
Speaker 1: got it? Okay? Oh yeah? Left? No no no no.
Speaker 1: When you're driving and I talked about this when you
Speaker 1: we talked to this on the podcast and I said,
Speaker 1: your signal then you slow down? Yes, yes, yes, okay,
Speaker 1: I got. I got into a fight yesterday. My mom
Speaker 1: in the car right so we're driving, mom, leave your
Speaker 1: mom alone. She was my mom was fighting. My mom
Speaker 1: was in the car, so I'm driving in the right lane. Okay.
Speaker 1: I got pulled over to unrelated to this star. I
Speaker 1: pulled over yesterday. Did you pulled David Brodye? Well, no,
Speaker 1: I pulled it. I pulled a mom of Brody because
Speaker 1: the police officer went to her side of the car,
Speaker 1: and so the windows rolled down and I said, I'm
Speaker 1: tell we sorry, officer. I wanted to get my mom home.
Speaker 1: And she says, officer, I'm so sorry. I have to
Speaker 1: pee very badly and I have a bladder condition, and
Speaker 1: he goes, I'm so sorry. Please continue. Oh that's great,
Speaker 1: that's awesome. I've already got us out. And because you know,
Speaker 1: my my husband was a police officer, and I you know,
Speaker 1: I wouldn't have asked my son to make that. She
Speaker 1: pulled the car. She pulled the card my father. Second
Speaker 1: second pull you pulling the card, my father. We were
Speaker 1: on the job at one. But that's legitimate matter that
Speaker 1: I legitimately weren't here for this range. But you're not
Speaker 1: legitimately of us. My mother didn't say. My mother didn't
Speaker 1: say she was a police officer. We're gonna be eating really,
Speaker 1: because I just got you four. Everybody hurt wing. By
Speaker 1: the way, we have to edit that because that guy
Speaker 1: I can't have his There is no reason have his
Speaker 1: voice on that. I feel like we should. We'll chop
Speaker 1: that down. We'll chop it down. It's already been choped
Speaker 1: by the time. He has already been chopped. And don't
Speaker 1: ask for the uncut because no, just no, just no,
Speaker 1: Brody is going to dinner. I don't know. We'll find
Speaker 1: out next week. Okay, So we're driving on this. It's
Speaker 1: a three two lane road. Right, left, lane is was
Speaker 1: it an old town road? No? No, because I didn't
Speaker 1: I didn't take my horse. And so the left lane
Speaker 1: is moving slowly and the right lanes moving okay, but
Speaker 1: I want to go I'm gonna go straight, so I
Speaker 1: get in the right lane. And this is the bullshit
Speaker 1: about public roads. Everybody has one of these. There's no
Speaker 1: signs that say the right lane is right lane only
Speaker 1: until you get right up to the end of the lane.
Speaker 1: And then there's an arrow painted on the ground which
Speaker 1: you can't see because they will are the cars in
Speaker 1: front of you on top of that arrow. So why
Speaker 1: is that right lane is right? Turn on? Right turn on?
Speaker 1: So I want to go straight, so I've got no
Speaker 1: choice now. Then this is before I got pulled up
Speaker 1: with the left lane. Have the arrow going forward? And yeah,
Speaker 1: right forward and to the left it's most No, it's forward.
Speaker 1: So when the when the light changes, I'm four car
Speaker 1: lengths from the light because now I've stopped and I
Speaker 1: realized I'm far lengths length you said links length lengths Yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: So I stopped and I put my time, I put
Speaker 1: I put my signal on in hopes that someone will
Speaker 1: let me in. Now I'm not a chiseler. I didn't
Speaker 1: drive up on the end to cut in it. The
Speaker 1: last second I realized I can't go straight to common
Speaker 1: mistake innocent enough, and I put my signal on. Hopefully
Speaker 1: there's no one behind me. Someone will be kind enough
Speaker 1: to know I'm fucked. Can you just let me in? Right?
Speaker 1: I looked to my left to see if I can
Speaker 1: get in. I haven't moved my moved my car, I
Speaker 1: haven't made an attempt to cut in front of anybody.
Speaker 1: And a woman in an suv I can see on face,
Speaker 1: has a look on a mean face going She's like,
Speaker 1: you're not fucking getting in here? Fuck you, you're fucking yeah.
Speaker 1: Of course I haven't done anything except I looked like.
Speaker 1: So she rides she she fucking rides the ass of
Speaker 1: the of the car in front of her. So I
Speaker 1: say to my mom, hold on, that woman just cursed
Speaker 1: me out. My mom says, David, don't, don't do it, mom.
Speaker 1: She goes, all right, fine, So so I give her
Speaker 1: the look. I go, you know what, I wasn't gonna
Speaker 1: cut in, not fucking going in front of you, and
Speaker 1: you got in front of her. So as we go,
Speaker 1: I'm pulling up I'm on the right side. No, so that.
Speaker 1: So what happens is the car in front of horror
Speaker 1: when it goes to the intersection, speeds up like like
Speaker 1: boom goes because the other car in front of that
Speaker 1: car pulled to the right lane. So the car in
Speaker 1: front of hard pull. So I zoomed the cutter, but
Speaker 1: she gave me the look you're not gonna pass me.
Speaker 1: I got a hand me, dude, I got a charger.
Speaker 1: I went right, blue hut doors off cut in front
Speaker 1: of her, and I see her in my rear of
Speaker 1: a mirrorging so so, so I I give her the
Speaker 1: reverse fingers through the back window. I do the dance.
Speaker 1: I'm doing the waves, the whole thing. I open up
Speaker 1: my moon roof for give her the wave. Did she
Speaker 1: see all of it? She saw all of it. So
Speaker 1: then I she said, we're pulling up to the next line.
Speaker 1: I see her pull into the left lane, the right lane. Rather,
Speaker 1: I'm in the left lane. Now she's in the right lane,
Speaker 1: one car behind me. So that there's a truck next
Speaker 1: to me, pickup truck. She's behind me. My mother says,
Speaker 1: you gotta go straight. Here I go, Mom, I'm making
Speaker 1: a right She says, no, no, no, no, you gotta
Speaker 1: go straight and go. Mom, make the right and I'll
Speaker 1: turn around later. I'm making a right, she says. He says,
Speaker 1: it's just to me. You're not gonna let it go,
Speaker 1: are you? No? So I say to the guy I
Speaker 1: waved to the truck driver, and I go, I want
Speaker 1: to pull him behind you can you go? And goes
Speaker 1: oh yeah, okay. So he goes through the street and
Speaker 1: I cut her off again and make it right. But
Speaker 1: you don't have to go right. But I waited. I
Speaker 1: cut her off, wait until the light was gonna change. Right.
Speaker 1: I made a spite right and I made the right
Speaker 1: and it was a no turn on red, so I
Speaker 1: made the right and then I the light changed so
Speaker 1: she couldn't make the right on red. So then what
Speaker 1: I did? She stuck at the light. I then I
Speaker 1: make a you turn on this side street because now
Speaker 1: I gotta go back and make the right. She's stuck
Speaker 1: at the light. She's at the light. So I go
Speaker 1: up to the light now and she's to my left
Speaker 1: at the light and I'm there again. Yeah, I'm like
Speaker 1: the light. I'm like a horror movie villain, and I
Speaker 1: give it a light delight. I give her the finger again.
Speaker 1: Now perpendicular, I give her a finger again, and my
Speaker 1: mother goes, are you done? Now? You got it? Three times?
Speaker 1: I said, yes, right now, I'm done. Now I'm done.
Speaker 1: She was a new driver, she was seventeen. This cry
Speaker 1: fuck you suv lady. No, no, she was. Yeah, look
Speaker 1: at me, the jungle in the road, kicking the road.
Speaker 1: The woman in the suv, guy in the pickup truck
Speaker 1: could do it every wance. That one snuck up on me.
Speaker 1: Gotta be quick, you gotta be quick. You got I
Speaker 1: was quick. I cut that woman off. I got you.
Speaker 1: See this horrific haircut. Yeah, I'm looking at Chelsea, not you.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, Dick. Sure I didn't see it on Google.
Speaker 1: She googled like this, this awesome haircut. It's one of
Speaker 1: those under shave cuts where you lift up the hair
Speaker 1: and then it's all shaved underneath, and then they design.
Speaker 1: These are good, the design and the scal Yes. But
Speaker 1: what she what she questioned, was this, and what she
Speaker 1: got was this. She showed a picture of the pattern, right,
Speaker 1: and so what she got was like a map you'd
Speaker 1: see on a kid's menu at a bad at a
Speaker 1: theme restaurant. It's all over the place. It's terrible, and
Speaker 1: she says, I wanted this haircut. I had not received
Speaker 1: a professional haircut in about a year. I always still
Speaker 1: I always have an undercut because my hair is so
Speaker 1: thick shaved underneath. However, this time I wanted to spice
Speaker 1: it up, and I gave them the design that I
Speaker 1: wanted shaved. So she assured me she can do it yeah,
Speaker 1: and started cutting. However, she totally funked up, as you
Speaker 1: can see by these pictures. I had no idea until
Speaker 1: I asked my nana to take a picture because I
Speaker 1: obviously can't see the back of my head. Now wait
Speaker 1: a second, pause, don't they show you give you a mirror,
Speaker 1: wouldn't she ask to see the mirror of what the
Speaker 1: hair look left? Halfway she went turns like. She went
Speaker 1: home and saw her nana, and her nana was like,
Speaker 1: what the funk happened to your hair? She was shocked
Speaker 1: when she found this out. I was, I was, why
Speaker 1: don't you go to a place that like it's best.
Speaker 1: They specialize. They have all the pictures of the graphics
Speaker 1: and the designs. You gotta go to a place that's
Speaker 1: that's their thing. Well it's not apparently wasn't their thing.
Speaker 1: She wants to know how she gets free dessert out
Speaker 1: of this situation. Uh. She loves us so much, loves
Speaker 1: us on The Big Show and the Brooklyn Boys podcast
Speaker 1: Crack Me Up. That is from Chelsea hashtag slice for Life.
Speaker 1: Al Right, well, I I got and be honest. Um,
Speaker 1: you just gotta take him to task. You just gonna
Speaker 1: go back and say hate my haircut? You can't do
Speaker 1: it a month later? No, yeah, you strike while the
Speaker 1: iron is hot. Yeah, and it looks like that's what
Speaker 1: they used, by the way to cut her iron. Melissa
Speaker 1: Rose on Twitter, I wished to be a happy birthday.
Speaker 1: She said, may your diet coke be ice free and
Speaker 1: your food di well, she wrote void, but I know
Speaker 1: she meant devoid devoid of anything green. That was really nice.
Speaker 1: Now am I wrong that I told back there and
Speaker 1: I said, just you know it's devoid. I want to know. No,
Speaker 1: you gotta correct? Um? Can I talk about Mark carg
Speaker 1: real quick? Mark car saw this on the J. C.
Speaker 1: Penny website and was confused as fuck. There's a men's
Speaker 1: section and a guy's section. What exactly is the difference? Uh?
Speaker 1: You're you're in the guy's section. I would be in
Speaker 1: the man's section. That's the difference men's drop down men's clothing, right,
Speaker 1: and that's this guy's clothing and their separate sections. So
Speaker 1: guys are what for guys are for boys? Well, no
Speaker 1: guys is like you like Brooklyn Industrial, Hey look at
Speaker 1: that guy. That's you. Hey, look at that guy. Way
Speaker 1: guys formal men's man, it's like a man's like, look
Speaker 1: at look at that man. That man's dressed. Well, that's
Speaker 1: a good looking man, dressed man. That's dressed man. So
Speaker 1: someone walking out of the cover of someone on a
Speaker 1: GQ magazine, that's a well dressed man. That's a man, right,
Speaker 1: guy closing with clothing would be like, hey, look at
Speaker 1: that guy. That would be Peter Millar. Yeah, that's a
Speaker 1: good guy. Yeah, look at that guy that Guys like
Speaker 1: the Abercrombie guy. Hey, look at that guy you Brooklyn Industrial,
Speaker 1: they were like, hey, look at that guy. Scary. You
Speaker 1: don't dress like a man all the time. You're just
Speaker 1: a guy. You look at guy you draw smoking jacket on,
Speaker 1: you know, you know a man in a jacket. Look
Speaker 1: at that guy in the jacket. A couple of episodes ago.
Speaker 1: Hold on, I got a question for you. Back to
Speaker 1: my friend Jeff. He he bought a suit. He went
Speaker 1: to a an Asian tailor. It's important I say that
Speaker 1: to the story, I think, and she says to him,
Speaker 1: it is. It's still funny this podcast. It's funny. So
Speaker 1: the woman syste him, how do you want your cuffs?
Speaker 1: He says, what do you mean? She says, regular or original?
Speaker 1: Regular or original? Oh, I know what that means. I'll
Speaker 1: tell you how it is. But that's that's that's the
Speaker 1: same thing when okay, I don't know how it is
Speaker 1: in the cuff world, but in the in the alteration
Speaker 1: of genes world, regular and original are different. Original means
Speaker 1: they literally cut the bottom of the genes off, and
Speaker 1: then when they restitch it, the bottom of the genes,
Speaker 1: no matter how short they make it is the original gene.
Speaker 1: Regular is when they just make they just make the
Speaker 1: the alteration and you know they folded in the whatever
Speaker 1: they do their own, it's not the original bottom. It's
Speaker 1: much it's much more expensive. It's much more expensive to
Speaker 1: get the original bottoms of the genes. Yeah, that's what that.
Speaker 1: So cuffs maybe the same way. Brodie where it's do
Speaker 1: you want the original cuff the way it was on
Speaker 1: the sleeve or do you want us to do a
Speaker 1: hack job and we it's cheaper when it's regular? Is
Speaker 1: that what it is? That is I'm applying something that
Speaker 1: I know is fact to another part of a different
Speaker 1: article of clothing. I'm that's how they do jeans for sure. Yeah,
Speaker 1: because the alterations are always different. It sounds to be
Speaker 1: like regular and original mean the same thing. Okay, okay,
Speaker 1: so uh someone just texted me and said, are you available?
Speaker 1: Who works in our industry? And I wrote back, I'm recording,
Speaker 1: not Let's see what they say. Right back again. No,
Speaker 1: let's see what they say. Hold on, I wanted to
Speaker 1: read something here. Oh oh, I gotta I gotta free
Speaker 1: ship for us. Okay, go ahead, Well no, I was
Speaker 1: gonna all right, continue, I want to thank uh Margaret, Hey, Uren,
Speaker 1: that's too long, I can't read it. But free ship
Speaker 1: for us. Hey, guys. Per the last podcast, our merchandise podcast,
Speaker 1: we talked about the merchandise who want to create? I
Speaker 1: got you, guys, Brooklyn Boys pop sockets. I'm sending these
Speaker 1: in the mail today from Virginia. Let me know once
Speaker 1: you get them so good boys to give the stuff
Speaker 1: free for us. So you blew that one on us. Okay,
Speaker 1: So what they did was they took our logo off
Speaker 1: of one of the podcasts or the websites whatever, and
Speaker 1: they went to pop Grip, not a sponsor, and created
Speaker 1: Brooklyn Boys pop sockets. That's amazing. Thank you so much
Speaker 1: for doing that. They spent their their hard earned money
Speaker 1: on us. They designed it. So I think we will
Speaker 1: definitely have Brooken Boys podcast pop sockets. We're gonna have
Speaker 1: merchandise are now we are scary and iro in the
Speaker 1: process of planning our live broadcast. Oh my god, hold on,
Speaker 1: we probably shouldn't say something because it hasn't been planned.
Speaker 1: It's gonna be sometime between now in the summer. Bertie,
Speaker 1: you do realize that on my previous podcast we would
Speaker 1: make these empty promises and we talked about and we
Speaker 1: never deliver. We're gonna have a merch store. We're gonna
Speaker 1: have free dessert, yes, yes, And I don't want to
Speaker 1: give away another thing. You had a great idea. I'm
Speaker 1: not gonna had an amazing We have some amazing ideas.
Speaker 1: We won't we won't pop the amazing idea off until
Speaker 1: we were there the pop socket, though we did mention
Speaker 1: the pop sockop sockets sockets. Kevin Kozlowski, UM, I want
Speaker 1: what I heard us talking about cashhos, cash shoes, cash
Speaker 1: cash shoes. He said we should do a parody to
Speaker 1: Boogie Shoes by Casey and trying bag Mama my cas shoes.
Speaker 1: I want to put on my ma, ma mama, my
Speaker 1: cash shoes and eat them with you. You wouldn't put
Speaker 1: on cash shoes. That's leave the parodies to me. I
Speaker 1: do like that song like Kevin Kaslowski said, yeah, you've
Speaker 1: got something there, Bertie, Yeah, maybe like I want to
Speaker 1: eat some I want to eat some big cash shoes
Speaker 1: ka ka ka kat cash shoes. I just did it
Speaker 1: without the kaka. I want to eat some good cashoes.
Speaker 1: Madeline Jerasi or Jerossi wrote, I can't wait for the
Speaker 1: merch uh. I hope this store opened soon. I will
Speaker 1: Pop sockets are a must. Just wanted to thank you
Speaker 1: all for letting us into the ins and outs of
Speaker 1: your daily lives and frustrations, more frustrations than anything else.
Speaker 1: I hope you all get higher than nine this week now.
Speaker 1: He felt a number twelve on the I Heart Radio
Speaker 1: Top one podcast. I'll tell you why. We had the
Speaker 1: the senior vice president of our company in the studio
Speaker 1: here on thusday, and I said, I said, hey, Tom,
Speaker 1: uh because, oh you know what, it was pissed me off.
Speaker 1: He didn't mean to piss me off. He's he's a
Speaker 1: good man, especially since he you know, he's the king
Speaker 1: of the company, one of the he's the he's the
Speaker 1: prince of the company, one of the princes. And I said, oh,
Speaker 1: you know, Tom, you've been posting some really great stuff
Speaker 1: on your Instagram. He's been going to some cool small
Speaker 1: venue clubs with major celebrities. He hangs out with the superstars.
Speaker 1: But to him, it's like when I grow up. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you gonna throw his last name around. That's fine. Anyway.
Speaker 1: I love him. I love Tom Palmer. He hired me.
Speaker 1: I gotta love him. You know what he did for
Speaker 1: me one night. He took me out and brought me
Speaker 1: a steak dinner. He did. He took me out to
Speaker 1: buy stake dinner too. Got for a big gass. He
Speaker 1: took me up. Yeah, no, Tom's got the got the
Speaker 1: company called. I love Tom anyway. So Tom says, yeah,
Speaker 1: you know, I've been to some great events. This month.
Speaker 1: I went to the Heart Radio Music and goes the
Speaker 1: I Heart Podcast Awards. So I said, oh, yeah about that.
Speaker 1: I said, how's Calling O'Brien doing And he says, what
Speaker 1: do you mean. I said, well, Tom Caran O'Brian won
Speaker 1: an award for Best Comedy Podcast. He says, oh, yeah,
Speaker 1: yeah he did. Yeah. Oh he's nice. He got to
Speaker 1: meet everybody. Yeah, I said, you know, Scary and I
Speaker 1: weren't there. He says, how come. I said, well, we
Speaker 1: weren't nominated, and uh, you guys weren't paying for it
Speaker 1: like you did last year. You flew us out. So
Speaker 1: he's like, you know, not really involved in the podcast selection.
Speaker 1: But I said, you know, Tom, Scary and I two
Speaker 1: weeks ago were number nine in the whole company and
Speaker 1: we were the highest ranked podcast if anyone who works
Speaker 1: all I Heart Radio. Your company, Tom, the company that
Speaker 1: you helped run. And he went, really, that's interesting, really,
Speaker 1: and he goes, let me look at the chart this week.
Speaker 1: I go, all right, this week with number two behind
Speaker 1: Breakfast Club. But they had a big movie. Well we know,
Speaker 1: but the second holdest employee, right, And I don't mind
Speaker 1: losing to the Breakfast club but the Breakfast Clubs podcast
Speaker 1: is a rebroadcast of the podcast, right, we're doing an
Speaker 1: original content. So I could then rephrase it and say
Speaker 1: for original content podcasts, we were number one again this
Speaker 1: week for I Heart employees. So I said, you know,
Speaker 1: it would be great if maybe next year we you know,
Speaker 1: you nominate some of the I Heart media employees who
Speaker 1: are highly ranked, you know. And so he was like, no, no,
Speaker 1: it's a great idea. And I was a couple of
Speaker 1: things to well, hopefully, hopefully we'll see what happens. But uh,
Speaker 1: look here comes the hold on. Okay, hold on, okay,
Speaker 1: hold on, hey man, we're recording a podcast right now.
Speaker 1: And I said, I wonder if the guy I just
Speaker 1: texted and told him I was recording will text back
Speaker 1: even though I just told him I'm recording, period, I
Speaker 1: just won five bucks love you? Period? Was that voice
Speaker 1: to text? And so, so, why when you say I'm recording,
Speaker 1: they feel the need to text back again? Right? So
Speaker 1: I just yeah, okay, he's gonna text back now, like
Speaker 1: she's sorry, who is this person? I'm not gonna tell you,
Speaker 1: but he handles all of our affiliates alright, Kelsey, Why
Speaker 1: don't we a funny tweet from Kelsey you go alright
Speaker 1: at K pair twenty one at David Brody thought you'd
Speaker 1: find this funny. Reminded me of the Brooklyn Boys episode
Speaker 1: where we heard a clip saying a little less than
Speaker 1: over a minute one of the best clips we've played
Speaker 1: a little leges. So she said, she sent me this, Um,
Speaker 1: I guess it's a news report tweet from wherever San
Speaker 1: Miguel is. San Miguel Sheriff tweeted this out. There's a
Speaker 1: picture of a police car and a boulder in the
Speaker 1: middle of the road, and the caption says, large boulder
Speaker 1: the size of a small boulder is completely blocking eastbound
Speaker 1: Like if like, what we're they trying to say large
Speaker 1: balld in the size of a small planet? What were
Speaker 1: they saying, large ball in the size of a small boulder?
Speaker 1: What is that? That's at sheriff alert? Oh that's a
Speaker 1: good twitter. Louis Zavala said, I have a quick and simple,
Speaker 1: funny sex story. What's up? This was the sex quick
Speaker 1: and funny. Well you'll hear in a second, but this
Speaker 1: was in relation to the episode where we were talking
Speaker 1: about how I someone someone fell all right, someone fell
Speaker 1: asleep while I was having sex with them. Remember that? Mhm,
Speaker 1: what's up? Guys. My name is Louise and I'm from Miami,
Speaker 1: but I'm actually in l A for dental school. You
Speaker 1: guys are the bomb and help with some major distraction
Speaker 1: from the stress, so I appreciate you. Long story short,
Speaker 1: I was once with my ex girlfriend and one night
Speaker 1: we were doing our business. I found myself down south
Speaker 1: pleasing her, and I actually ended up being the one
Speaker 1: to fall asleep while I was down there. Oh, I
Speaker 1: caught myself dozing off, and I honestly couldn't believe. What's
Speaker 1: this person's name, Louise, Louise, Louise fell asleep? Yeah, I
Speaker 1: started chuckling at the thought of it while I was
Speaker 1: still down there. We broke up a while ago, and
Speaker 1: to this day, I'm not sure if she is aware
Speaker 1: of that happening, but I can probably say I have
Speaker 1: pleased a woman in my sleep. Hashtag slice for life.
Speaker 1: Thank you, Louis. I think we've all pleased a woman
Speaker 1: and I'll sleep. He fell asleep at the wheel, Yeah, yeah, yeah?
Speaker 1: Did he just use it as a pillow just like
Speaker 1: I don't know. I want to put my head down.
Speaker 1: You didn't get involved in this conversation very much. But
Speaker 1: Shady Ju Mobster, who was one of our loyal tweeters. Um,
Speaker 1: they wrote, remember last week, we're talking about the movie
Speaker 1: of You, and you kept giving away clues as to
Speaker 1: the movie. Yeah, so he wrote, this is for Scary
Speaker 1: jo Oh, this is Scary Jones. According you, I'm not
Speaker 1: giving anything away, but Jim Carrey serious movie surprise ending, Browsky,
Speaker 1: you gave it away. No one's wondering if what you
Speaker 1: were talking about. Um okay, So I wrote back, Hey man,
Speaker 1: Scary did I didn't give anything away? So he says, um, no,
Speaker 1: I was. I was referring to Scary, So I said,
Speaker 1: but you called him Browsky. Brosky is a nickname for
Speaker 1: like Brodie Brody Brosky. You wouldn't call Scary Brosky. So
Speaker 1: when you called him Browsky, I assumed you meant I
Speaker 1: gave the end of the movie away. So he says,
Speaker 1: I didn't know you had the singular ownership of Browsky.
Speaker 1: So first of all, so then he goes, all right,
Speaker 1: I'll refer to Scary Jones a brocef. I go, no,
Speaker 1: you're missing the point. Bro is brody. People call me
Speaker 1: Browsky sometimes Joe, what's up? Brosky? Like is a goof.
Speaker 1: So I said, like, you should call him like like
Speaker 1: Jonesie or like scares Key. But you can't call scary Brosky,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. But he was talking about
Speaker 1: you though, He was like, dude, you get way into
Speaker 1: the movie Brosky. But wouldn't you think that was he
Speaker 1: was talking about me? Yeah? Right, yeah, I didn't give
Speaker 1: away anything. This was someone sent this to us. It's
Speaker 1: not Look, I'm not making fun of the tragedy, Okay,
Speaker 1: I'm just telling you what the caption said. And one
Speaker 1: of our listeners sent this to us and said, that's unfortunate.
Speaker 1: And I heard three newscasters say this. This was about
Speaker 1: the helicopter crash. I'm not making fun of the crash.
Speaker 1: The caption on Breaking News says l A County fire
Speaker 1: chief quote. Unfortunately, all survivors on board perished. They're right,
Speaker 1: they're not survivors. Yeah, all passengers perish. You wouldn't say, yeah,
Speaker 1: all survivors on board. There were no survivors, right, survivors
Speaker 1: didn't perish. That's terrible right there, that's terrible. Who wrote
Speaker 1: that the sheriff said it, and then the new service
Speaker 1: quoted him. Uh Nelson Abrams on Twitter. I love that.
Speaker 1: Just heard a new one to add to the then
Speaker 1: number eight TM machine conversation. First time I've ever heard
Speaker 1: someone call it a GPS system. I guess that person
Speaker 1: is not a slice. That's correct GPS system. That would
Speaker 1: be that silly Global Positioning system. Uh. T White Senor,
Speaker 1: huge fan of the podcast and Walkers and Talkers. According
Speaker 1: to Scary, the hat is cool because if you know,
Speaker 1: you know, but then the same rule doesn't apply to
Speaker 1: the f you Ape seventy seven shirt. You said no
Speaker 1: one would get the joke, but you said if you
Speaker 1: know the Miami do you know what? I retract that
Speaker 1: then yes, that's why APE seventy seven shirt could work. Okay,
Speaker 1: but that goes along with my argument that if you know,
Speaker 1: you know, if you don't know, then you don't know.
Speaker 1: Tara Up, Yes, I I take that back, Tara Bagaman,
Speaker 1: I just don't think they're gonna sell very many a right.
Speaker 1: Tara Baghman a fan of both of my podcasts our
Speaker 1: She's the dog trainer, um she uh the agility dog
Speaker 1: Agility trainer. Uh Brooklyn Boys my favorite podcast ever. That
Speaker 1: means Walkers and Talkers a second favorite. I'm fine with that.
Speaker 1: And I will buy everything and your highly anticipated merch store.
Speaker 1: I will proudly run my agility dogs in an f
Speaker 1: U A set i'd love. Also, I'd love a water
Speaker 1: bottle or a glass that says no ice hashtag broken boys, merch. Uh,
Speaker 1: let's say a couple more here. Oh, this person says,
Speaker 1: they know, damn well, what movie you're talking about? Damn
Speaker 1: you scary? Hashtag brody and scary. And it's okay that
Speaker 1: you do. And it doesn't adn't give anything away, right,
Speaker 1: you've seen the trailer, say Levy Monum says no disrespect
Speaker 1: scary Jones being from Miami. If my girls and I
Speaker 1: saw a guy wearing a hat from eleven Miami, we'd
Speaker 1: think they were a douche or trying too hard hashtag
Speaker 1: don't do it. Um. Okay, let's see, Oh, Olympus Olympus
Speaker 1: five wants Olympus s five. I don't know what they
Speaker 1: want property of shirts. They want property boys. That's a definite,
Speaker 1: and that's a definite. Uh, that's a given. Okay, and
Speaker 1: then uh, you benefited from benefiting. Okay, what can we
Speaker 1: do for what can we do exclusively for women? I
Speaker 1: need you to help me with this so we could
Speaker 1: false not false. Let me think about that, well, tank
Speaker 1: top maybe little tank top. Okay, Kayla has a question
Speaker 1: for both of us. Saw this on a dating app.
Speaker 1: Should I like him back just so I can correct
Speaker 1: his spelling and then remove the like? Yes, that is
Speaker 1: what Dale forty one years old wrote. I'm on my
Speaker 1: second and now see this is why I said, don't
Speaker 1: attack the guy. He says on my second career, I'm
Speaker 1: retired from the navy. Right away, I was like, no,
Speaker 1: he served our country, don't go after him. But he wrote,
Speaker 1: definitely have my life together, been to twenty five countries,
Speaker 1: lived on three continents. I'm blah blah blah, hater of drama,
Speaker 1: someone who doesn't have their life together. Oh, I'm a
Speaker 1: hater of drama. Comma. But then the way the sentence
Speaker 1: is phrased, it doesn't play right. Hater of drama, comma,
Speaker 1: someone who doesn't have their life together, comma, no respect
Speaker 1: comma and misuse of grammar. Okay, first of all, it
Speaker 1: looks like he's saying, I'm a hater of drama. I'm
Speaker 1: someone who doesn't have their life together. I don't have
Speaker 1: any respect and misuse of grammar. He capitalized grammar and
Speaker 1: then spelled it with an E R. I love that.
Speaker 1: I love that. That is the best. That's ironic. That
Speaker 1: is ironic. So everybody who says the police on a
Speaker 1: misspelling and they spell grammar with an e R is
Speaker 1: a hater of people who misuse grammar. I spelled grammar
Speaker 1: with an E R. Are you sure he wasn't doing
Speaker 1: it on purpose? Nope? Alright. And this person sent a
Speaker 1: sign which when we do our live show, we'll be
Speaker 1: able to show the show with this sign. It says,
Speaker 1: do not touch bread with hands, please use tongue. And
Speaker 1: then I have one quick free desert story from DJ
Speaker 1: Sky just wanted to share with you. I got a
Speaker 1: four credit from Verizon because of an hour way time
Speaker 1: and lack of communication on their end. Thank you for
Speaker 1: teaching me the way, Master, This is the way, which
Speaker 1: is a Mandalorian quote. Slice for Life brought and scary
Speaker 1: so free dessert. They got four in twenty hours. Um,
Speaker 1: all right, so you you're you're in a rant city
Speaker 1: right now. I am the mayor of Rant City. But
Speaker 1: I did. I did the I did the rant about
Speaker 1: I did a rant already. I'll throw one more thing.
Speaker 1: And I want to give a tribute to my friend
Speaker 1: Carlos as we get out of it today, because my
Speaker 1: birthday and I want to go celebrate. It's about time.
Speaker 1: Carlos was is from Peru. Originally we worked together when
Speaker 1: we managed I managed restaurants. Were both assistant managers at
Speaker 1: the time, and Carlos was in the country maybe six
Speaker 1: or seven eight years, spoke English fairly well, but he
Speaker 1: wasn't add percent comfortable with the idios ms atic idiomsdy.
Speaker 1: I corrected myself right away. I apologize. And so you
Speaker 1: know the old expression, oh you got a quarter inch
Speaker 1: dick right quarter foot? Why did you give what the ending?
Speaker 1: Because you've told that joke on here ten times. I'm
Speaker 1: catching people up to yeah, because Elvis brought it up
Speaker 1: in the room this week and I was like, should again? No?
Speaker 1: I no, I was just bringing people up to speed
Speaker 1: for the because well where else would have gone? But
Speaker 1: the punchline you just gave away episodes. I can't remember
Speaker 1: everything we've talked about. We've done that joke three times
Speaker 1: on this podcast. It again quot baby. Yeah right, okay,
Speaker 1: you wanted to add to that. Hey remember that story
Speaker 1: in that joke, now, why don't you there was a
Speaker 1: follow up about Car about Car. I just wanted to
Speaker 1: bring it up because, uh, it's just Elvis brought up again.
Speaker 1: It's them my life FML. I can I can't, I
Speaker 1: can't leave what salary man? Okay? So what about all
Speaker 1: the people with me? Safonia, the Arians, the pans. Where
Speaker 1: do we come up with? Yeah? Okay, the people crazy
Speaker 1: to the max? No, I'm not making my say. I'm
Speaker 1: not consensitive to the max, not calling pretty crazy. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna have a happy birthday. I will let you guys
Speaker 1: know next week if I ended up with dinner reservations
Speaker 1: at the steakhouse, that's scary tribe but failed to get
Speaker 1: me help. And by the way, Bertie, yeah, don't forget
Speaker 1: super Bowl this weekend. You made me pick my pick.
Speaker 1: You chose my pick for me. Yeah, on the last episode,
Speaker 1: we did it live on the episode I did. I
Speaker 1: have Kansas City chiefs think by a point and a half,
Speaker 1: so they have to one by two in order for
Speaker 1: me to cover. For me to call up, I'll be fine.
Speaker 1: But if you're losing on my fault. I don't know
Speaker 1: any money you ship you and Jeff. I'm not giving
Speaker 1: him a penny either. He didn't like Jeff. He didn't
Speaker 1: he didn't like to play. It's not my problem. You
Speaker 1: made a pick for Jeff. No, I picked a plate.
Speaker 1: Didn't like it. Huh. Happy birthday, buddy, thank you. One
Speaker 1: day this week, trip to Brooklyn, nice boy after dr
Speaker 1: Fat loss is done by jingle. Hit the jingle. I
Speaker 1: don't care if the show's over. You can't do that over. No,
Speaker 1: you don't get to hit the chang. Hit the damn jingle, Bitch,
Speaker 1: it's my birthday. Dick was a scary