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Speaker 1: Welcome to Dirty Rush, The Truth about Sorority Life with

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Speaker 1: your hosts me Gia Judice.

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Speaker 2: Daisy Kent, and Jennifer Kessler. Hi, you guys, welcome back

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Speaker 2: to another episode of Dirty Rush, Rush Week, Best Week

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Speaker 2: of your life or absolute nightmare. Today on Dirty Rush,

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Speaker 2: we're talking Rush, love it or hate it and hearing

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Speaker 2: directly from people who lived it and survived it. So

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Speaker 2: first we are bringing in Kate Hi. Kate Hi, Hi,

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Speaker 2: where'd you go to school?

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Speaker 1: I went to school at TCU.

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Speaker 2: Ah Texas girl. Yeah, I went to ut SO and TCU.

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Speaker 2: From what I hear, TCU has an intense rush.

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Speaker 3: It is pretty intense.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: We have thirteen houses and there's so many girls, so

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Speaker 1: it's really interesting.

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Speaker 2: Wow. Well listen today I want to hear from you

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Speaker 2: if you loved it or you hated it. We're talking

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Speaker 2: about the whole process of it and obviously it could

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Speaker 2: be nerve wracking, thrilling, scary. So we're just trying to,

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Speaker 2: you know, talk to some of you guys and see

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Speaker 2: different opinions.

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Speaker 4: How was it for you? How is rush personally?

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Speaker 1: I like following my sisters to my school was really

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Speaker 1: interesting because one of my sisters has graduated and one

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Speaker 1: is currently an active member and she's a senior, and

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Speaker 1: so I went in with a lot of preconceived notions

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Speaker 1: about like sororities, and like I knew their friends that

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Speaker 1: were in their sororities were in different ones.

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Speaker 3: And then my sister who's currently a senior, she lives with.

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Speaker 1: All Kappas, but she's a Sigma Kappa, so like I

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Speaker 1: knew her Kapa friends, and I just like knew so

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Speaker 1: many people going in. So it was nice to see

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Speaker 1: like the type of girls that were in each But

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Speaker 1: I think that like I really didn't know until I went,

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Speaker 1: like what I would actually think about the sororities.

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Speaker 3: But I think it was nice like being able to.

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Speaker 1: Go in with like an idea of what I was

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Speaker 1: setting myself up for and what kind of girls were.

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Speaker 2: Like it was it helped us sort of like it

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Speaker 2: helped us sort of dissipate the nerves a little bit.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, totally.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, although I'm I mean, you tell me, were you nervous?

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Speaker 2: I was?

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Speaker 4: I remember?

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Speaker 3: I was, Yeah, I was nervous.

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Speaker 1: I mean it's a lot to live up to, especially

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Speaker 1: both of like my older sisters being in an austhrority

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Speaker 1: going through RUSSI and it going pretty well for both

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Speaker 1: of them, So that was interesting. But I think I

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Speaker 1: was more excited than nervous because I knew that I

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Speaker 1: like felt confident and like had so many resources, and yeah,

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Speaker 1: I was just more excited.

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Speaker 4: I think, did you know you kind of know? Did

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Speaker 4: you kind of know what it was going to be

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Speaker 4: like before?

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Speaker 2: You know? I think some people go in blind, but

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Speaker 2: it sounds like I know you probably knew the rundown, right.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, totally.

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Speaker 4: Do you have an easy time talking to people?

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Speaker 1: I do have a pretty easy time talking to people.

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Speaker 1: I think that like knowing especially what question like what

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Speaker 1: type of questions they were going to ask, and like

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Speaker 1: what we're going to be talking about and what not

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Speaker 1: to mention and things like that. I think that it

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Speaker 1: was like really easy. And I'm a people person, so

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Speaker 1: it was like just exciting to have conversations with girls

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Speaker 1: my age.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, of course, so you were kind of you were prepared. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: I think it probably does change things, you know, it

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Speaker 2: just kind of knowing how it's going to go, especially

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Speaker 2: like what kind of questions you're gonna get asked?

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Speaker 4: What kind of questions did you get asked?

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Speaker 1: I mean it's a lot of the same conversation over

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Speaker 1: and over again, like going into the different houses and

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Speaker 1: especially it depends on the round. But like philanthropy was

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Speaker 1: so baseline, just like where are you from, what do

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Speaker 1: you like to do? What's your major? Like what building

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Speaker 1: do you live in? And like how's move in and

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Speaker 1: stuff like that, because I did it's false semester rush

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Speaker 1: and so it was all very general and then like

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Speaker 1: as it went on, just like not mentioning like what

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Speaker 1: do they say, like the three b's or whatever and stuff.

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Speaker 4: Like that, what are those?

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Speaker 1: It's booze boys and Bible? And then other people say

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Speaker 1: like Biden's like not politics or there's another I can't remember,

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Speaker 1: but like you just like shouldn't mention those things. But

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Speaker 1: like in probably half of the conversations I had, I

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Speaker 1: mentioned them.

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Speaker 3: Really I won't say, I'll.

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Speaker 1: Like advise that, but I think it's like okay, if

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Speaker 1: you let us sleep a few times, because we're all

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Speaker 1: like humanues just girls having conversations. But yeah, it was

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Speaker 1: all like very similar conversations every time I'd go into

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Speaker 1: like a different house. But it's just like fun talking

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Speaker 1: to like girls my age about fun things.

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Speaker 2: Were there any were there any points of it even

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Speaker 2: though you know, you did sort of know what you

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Speaker 2: were getting into. Were there any points where you were

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Speaker 2: really nervous or you know, stressed because you love the

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Speaker 2: girls that you didn't expect to love, or was there

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Speaker 2: any of that or was it just did you sort

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Speaker 2: of we were able to breeze through it.

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Speaker 1: I wouldn't say it was like a total breeze through

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Speaker 1: for me because obviously, like I kind of well, my

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Speaker 1: sister is like a senior, so she's an active member,

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Speaker 1: and going in I like thought of her soulrity obviously

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Speaker 1: as an option, so I didn't really like know if

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Speaker 1: that's what I like for sure wanted or not. But

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Speaker 1: like going into the houses that I got back, I

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Speaker 1: was most nervous about s K, which is signal happened

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Speaker 1: which my sister's in, because I like felt so under

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Speaker 1: pressure because like if I didn't care, I didn't even

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Speaker 1: know if I wanted it for sure, but like if

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Speaker 1: I didn't get it or if it didn't go well,

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Speaker 1: I just felt like, oh, like that's weird, Like I

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Speaker 1: should like be good in it because like my sister's.

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Speaker 4: In it, So that's pressure and right, some that I.

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Speaker 3: Didn't know any about.

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Speaker 1: It was really fun to go to those ones because

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Speaker 1: like I didn't have any like expectations that I could

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Speaker 1: just like really freely like say whatever, and like the

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Speaker 1: girls were so nice, So that was fun.

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Speaker 3: Like there are some other ones that, like.

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Speaker 1: Some girls from my high school that are like older

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Speaker 1: when so seeing them was pretty nerve wracking, but it

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Speaker 1: was really fun to like have familiar faces.

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Speaker 4: Do you feel like you rushed?

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Speaker 2: Well, you went in, I guess because you you were

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Speaker 2: definitely going to rush, there was no doubt about it.

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Speaker 2: But did you feel like maybe I didn't need to

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Speaker 2: take this path or did you ever you know, regret

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Speaker 2: it or were you did it all just feel like

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Speaker 2: this is what I was supposed to do.

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Speaker 1: I mean, yeah, there's like a little bit of both.

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Speaker 1: I don't think that if I had older sisters, I

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Speaker 1: would have been the type of person to rush.

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Speaker 4: Really why not?

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Speaker 3: I don't know.

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Speaker 1: I Also, like with going to TCU, I don't think

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Speaker 1: I would have gone there if like a bunch of

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Speaker 1: people from my high school. Yeah, because we're from Nevada.

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Speaker 1: It's like so random to go to Texas from Nevada. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: just like eventually, like people started going a lot, and

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Speaker 1: then both my sisters went, and then I visited so

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Speaker 1: much that I ended up loving it. But I think

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Speaker 1: that if I didn't go to TC, I would have

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Speaker 1: gone to like Boulder or something more like outdoors or

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Speaker 1: like something like that. But I mean, I'm so glad

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Speaker 1: that like I have like been brat on this path

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Speaker 1: and like followed my sisters because it's so much fun,

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Speaker 1: and like I think that now it's like totally where

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Speaker 1: I was meant to be. But I don't know if

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Speaker 1: I would have like sought it out myself and then

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Speaker 1: like in terms of RUSH, I think I maybe would

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Speaker 1: have done it like no matter where I went, but

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Speaker 1: like doing it out of Southern School is obviously like

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Speaker 1: very different than other things. But yeah, I think it

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Speaker 1: worked out well.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm so glad. All right, guys, So now we

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Speaker 2: are bringing in Sabine Hi. Sabine Hi, so happy, so

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Speaker 2: happy to have you.

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Speaker 4: Welcome.

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Speaker 2: We're talking today about Rush. Loved it, hated it. So

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Speaker 2: I'm just gonna shoot some questions at you. First, I

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Speaker 2: think that you rushed as a junior, Is that right?

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Speaker 4: Yeah?

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Speaker 5: I rushed as a junior, A bit of an unconventional experience,

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Speaker 5: but seriously, like only the highest compliments the entire process,

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Speaker 5: like I had the most in the same time.

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Speaker 4: Really through recruitment.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I rushed as a junior too, and I

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Speaker 2: remember feeling I had a I mean, I enjoyed it.

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Speaker 2: I went in there with sort of these you know,

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Speaker 2: I sort of knew where I wanted to be. I

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Speaker 2: was a junior and I had friends in a certain storty.

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Speaker 2: But it was a little strange for me just with

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Speaker 2: all the freshmen. I don't know, you felt like you

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Speaker 2: didn't feel any of that.

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Speaker 5: So my experience was a bit different because I'm in

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Speaker 5: a dual degree program, so I spent my first two

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Speaker 5: years studying abroad in France, And so when I got

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Speaker 5: to Berkeley, I only knew like my high school best

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Speaker 5: friends that had chosen to go to school in Berkeley,

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Speaker 5: but and I knew what storties they were in. But

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Speaker 5: I made the mental note before the process that I

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Speaker 5: didn't want to join a house that my friends were

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Speaker 5: in because I wanted it to be like my own

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Speaker 5: unique experience. I went into it with like zero I

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Speaker 5: knew the houses they were in, and I knew kind

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Speaker 5: of the vibes of the house is. But I went

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Speaker 5: into it and I was like, I'm gonna take this

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Speaker 5: experience as my own. I'm gonna meet the girls, I'm

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Speaker 5: gonna feel the energy of the house, I'm gonna see

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Speaker 5: how the process goes, and I'm gonna go where my

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Speaker 5: gut is. And it wasn't kind of the process. It

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Speaker 5: wasn't the feeling of like I know which one I

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Speaker 5: want to be in and I'm going to do the

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Speaker 5: whole recruitment process just for that house, right like I

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Speaker 5: was there to kind of. I've been thinking a lot

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Speaker 5: about the process in general because I've seriously gained so

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Speaker 5: much from it and being in like I'm in DG

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Speaker 5: now and it's been the most amazing, Like it's been

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Speaker 5: like the experience that changed my time at Berkeley.

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Speaker 4: Really it is DG. Not the one that your friends

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Speaker 4: from high school were in.

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Speaker 5: No, so none of I didn't know anyone going into it, Okay,

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Speaker 5: And I've been reflecting a lot about the process, and

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Speaker 5: I think what changed it for me and what made

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Speaker 5: it this much like this just so incredible, was that

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Speaker 5: for me going into recruitment and joining authority could only

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Speaker 5: be net positive, Like I only was thinking about it

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Speaker 5: in the sense that, like, I got to Berkeley with

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Speaker 5: the most amazing best friends from France, and I felt

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Speaker 5: such an amazing community already that I was like, if

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Speaker 5: I'm going to join a sorority, it's only gonna be awesome, Like,

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Speaker 5: I'm not gonna do it if it's kind of like

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Speaker 5: a in between experiences.

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Speaker 2: Well, okay, So I just have to ask you, because

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Speaker 2: I think that is such a wonderful, positive, fabulous way

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Speaker 2: right to enter into this crazy experience.

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Speaker 4: Are you like that all over the place in real life?

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Speaker 5: I've I really try to be Yeah. Yeah for contact. So,

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Speaker 5: my sister was in a sorority. She went to Purdue

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Speaker 5: University and she was in five U and she also

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Speaker 5: had that experience. So she went through recruitment during COVID,

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Speaker 5: so she did all of her recruitment on zoom. She

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Speaker 5: ended up in a house that fit her like a glove,

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Speaker 5: met the most amazing people, and like I always saw,

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Speaker 5: I saw her experience in her four years in college,

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Speaker 5: and I was like, I want that. But then I

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Speaker 5: went to France, which had nothing close to a sorority. Course,

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Speaker 5: I had a bunch of international students who knew nothing

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Speaker 5: about sorority life, and I've always had this feeling in me,

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Speaker 5: like I was class president in high school. I've always

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Speaker 5: had this sense of like, I know that if I

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Speaker 5: went to a traditional US university for four years, I

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Speaker 5: probably would have done the full like exec sorority experience

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Speaker 5: and have been really involved, just because that's that's a

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Speaker 5: space where I feel the most myself, kind of like

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Speaker 5: a leadership position with a bunch of really positive girls

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Speaker 5: who are happy to be there and want to be

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Speaker 5: a part of this experience and like love just like

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Speaker 5: because you're not in a sorority if you don't want

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Speaker 5: to be in it, you know what I mean. It's

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Speaker 5: like you're paying the dues and you're showing up to

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Speaker 5: the house and you're going to chapter, and if you

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Speaker 5: don't want to be in it, then that really shows.

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Speaker 5: And so I was like, I think I could so

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Speaker 5: see myself in a space in which I'm surrounded by

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Speaker 5: people who all want to be there and all want

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Speaker 5: to be a part of it, And so I think

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Speaker 5: I definitely try and carry that through other parts of

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Speaker 5: my life and do things that feel like they just

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Speaker 5: click for me. And so I went into the experience

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Speaker 5: being like I if this doesn't work on day one,

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Speaker 5: I'll just drop. And then day one I was like,

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Speaker 5: this is awesome, Like this is so fun, like I'm

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Speaker 5: just chatting with people, like everyone's happy to be here,

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Speaker 5: like it was. It was seriously a week that was

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Speaker 5: just fun, Like it was just super fun.

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Speaker 2: I mean, listen, because we're bringing in girls that did

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Speaker 2: not love the process as well, so we're.

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Speaker 4: Talking to a mix.

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Speaker 2: But I think what what is resonating with me is

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Speaker 2: what you said about you knew going in that it

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Speaker 2: was going to be good, right, like you have and

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Speaker 2: I'm sure you know that kind of power positive thinking

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Speaker 2: carries over in all different aspects of your life. But

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Speaker 2: you know, for our listeners, I don't know. I mean

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Speaker 2: I think that that probably made a huge difference. I

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Speaker 2: don't know how to tell people to get in that mindset, right,

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Speaker 2: but if you're going in saying it's going to be

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Speaker 2: good period, that it can't sort of not be maybe,

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Speaker 2: I don't know.

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Speaker 5: I think that in a way for me, like it

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Speaker 5: was definitely a mindset switch because I knew even as

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Speaker 5: a sophomore when I was in France that I when

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Speaker 5: I got to cal that I would want to join

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Speaker 5: a sorority. So I kind of already had it in

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Speaker 5: the back of my mind, and so I went into

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Speaker 5: the summer before junior year being like, this is gonna

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Speaker 5: be really Like in my head, I was like, this

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Speaker 5: is gonna be weird. Like it's gonna be weird to

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Speaker 5: be a twenty year old with a bunch of seventeen

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Speaker 5: year olds going into recruitment with people who have just

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Speaker 5: moved out of their house and like their hometowns, and

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Speaker 5: you know, I had all that craziness as a freshman,

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Speaker 5: and I was in my head, I'm like, if I

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Speaker 5: was a freshman like I was, I was really thinking

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Speaker 5: back to my time, and I was like, if I

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Speaker 5: was a freshman in France and I had to go

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Speaker 5: and do recruitment, I don't know I would I didn't

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Speaker 5: feel like myself at that time because I had just

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Speaker 5: moved out of my house. I had just moved like

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Speaker 5: thousands and thousands of miles away from my parents and

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Speaker 5: everything that I had known. And I feel like if

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Speaker 5: I had gone into that experience and tried to do

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Speaker 5: recruitment in that mindset, like that version of me, I

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Speaker 5: don't think I would have ended up in the most

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Speaker 5: perfect place that I'm in now, if that makes sense.

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Speaker 4: It does make sense.

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Speaker 2: And I think, you know, for our listeners either sometimes

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Speaker 2: rush doesn't go well and maybe they want to try

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Speaker 2: again as a sophomore or a junior, or for kids

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Speaker 2: or you know, girls that are transferring. Right what you're

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Speaker 2: describing right now, I think is super interesting and insightful,

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Speaker 2: because you know, you could kind of go two ways, right,

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Speaker 2: Like I was sort of like as a junior, huh,

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Speaker 2: Like I feel kind of silly with all these freshmen,

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Speaker 2: but what you just said, I wouldn't have been the

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Speaker 2: same person freshman year, right, right, And so in terms

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Speaker 2: of my own just self confidence, just sort of growing

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Speaker 2: into myself, I had definitely had more of that as

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Speaker 2: a junior. So just an interesting point for listeners who

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Speaker 2: are thinking about maybe not rushing freshman year, rushing after.

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Speaker 5: That, right, I think I needed the time because I

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Speaker 5: think when I think about like, just like my life

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Speaker 5: in general, I think freshman year is the time that

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Speaker 5: I grew the most, like in a span of time.

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Speaker 5: Because obviously it's so crazy to move abroad. That's like

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Speaker 5: the most insane like uproot of everything you've ever known.

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Speaker 5: But then you're also kind of being forced to live

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Speaker 5: alone and you're taking really hard classes and you're by yourself,

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Speaker 5: Like I didn't know anyone when I moved abroad and

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Speaker 5: I didn't even speak French. So like a lot of

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Speaker 5: really crazy, just like super crazy life experiences that over

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Speaker 5: the span of the year. When I got back the

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Speaker 5: summer after my freshman year, I was like, I feel different,

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Speaker 5: Like I could actively feel that I like had grown

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Speaker 5: and had experienced things that I never would have realized.

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Speaker 5: And I think that is like one of my biggest

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Speaker 5: pieces of advice is if you think you like the

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Speaker 5: idea of being in a sorority, and you like the

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Speaker 5: concept of like what it has to offer in that

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Speaker 5: sense of like community and sisterhood, but you don't feel

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Speaker 5: like when you get to school you're yourself, Like it

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Speaker 5: seriously doesn't do any harm to join as a sophomore,

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Speaker 5: or to try it later, or to do like some

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Speaker 5: schools offers spring recruitment or cob and do the whole

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Speaker 5: like kind of get yourself some time to settle in

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Speaker 5: and to start to feel like yourself again those first

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Speaker 5: couple of weeks at least for me, and I can

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Speaker 5: confidently say for a lot of my friends were so

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Speaker 5: like unnerving and like unsettling because you just didn't you

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Speaker 5: were in a space that you didn't recognize. And so

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Speaker 5: to do all that and to feel that way and

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Speaker 5: then to also have to like basically elevate elevator pitch

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Speaker 5: yourself to girls for a week straight is very weird.

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Speaker 4: I would think.

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Speaker 2: So, I mean especially coming from you know, being abroad,

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Speaker 2: and I so I picture sort of you know abroad

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Speaker 2: is so being it's so worldly, right, You're in you

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Speaker 2: said you didn't speak the language, and you are just

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Speaker 2: being exposed to this culture and then you're all of

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Speaker 2: a sudden becoming a sorority girl, and I whatever that means, right,

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Speaker 2: And I.

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Speaker 4: Would think that that would be a huge pivot.

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Speaker 2: But you know, interestingly enough, the way you're describing it,

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Speaker 2: it worked for you, right, Like if you think of, oh,

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Speaker 2: I'm gonna I don't know if it was it Paris,

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Speaker 2: I don't know where you were.

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Speaker 5: I was right outside of Paris.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, So you go to Paris for two years,

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Speaker 2: you learn to speak the language, you're on Parisians, and

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Speaker 2: now all of a sudden you're a sorority girl, right,

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Speaker 2: Like what And I think that's so cool that that

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Speaker 2: that that the way that that worked for you. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: I think that, Like as a mom, I remembered really

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Speaker 2: trying to convince both my kids, but particularly my daughter,

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Speaker 2: to take a gap year because I I just think

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Speaker 2: that it's an opportunity to sort of grow and grow

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Speaker 2: into who you are and maybe become a little more

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Speaker 2: self confident and self aware.

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Speaker 4: She didn't. He didn't, But.

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Speaker 2: I think that it it for anybody maybe considering waiting

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Speaker 2: a year.

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Speaker 4: I agree with you.

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Speaker 2: I think it's it's it can be a sort of

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Speaker 2: fabulous way to just not be bombarded when you start

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Speaker 2: in school, right.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, And I think I've definitely there's this sense of

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Speaker 5: when I've when I think about my time in d G,

384
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Speaker 5: I have this sense of like big sister feeling, which

385
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Speaker 5: has been like, I'm I'm an older sister, so I've

386
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Speaker 5: always grown up being the younger sister, and I very

387
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Speaker 5: much like have all the traits of a younger sister.

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Speaker 5: And then I joined DG, and I'm best friends with

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Speaker 5: girls that are two years younger than me. Like I

390
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Speaker 5: got into a friend group of a bunch of freshmen

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Speaker 5: as a junior, and I started to feel this sense

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Speaker 5: of like purpose by joining it's kind of weird, Like

393
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Speaker 5: I joined a sorority and you'd expect that it's like

394
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Speaker 5: the stereotypes of like sorority girl and like parties and

395
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Speaker 5: all this stuff, but then you join it and you're like, no,

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Speaker 5: like I feel like very like maternal over like girls

397
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Speaker 5: that are younger than I feel this sense of like,

398
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Speaker 5: I have so much that I want to tell you

399
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Speaker 5: and wisdom and all this stuff that I never have

400
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Speaker 5: had a space to give because I've always been the

401
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Speaker 5: younger sister, right, And I like join a house of

402
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Speaker 5: girls that I'm like, I care so much about you

403
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Speaker 5: guys and want you guys to have the best college experience,

404
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Speaker 5: and so I want to like give you all this

405
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Speaker 5: advice of things that I've been learning over my time.

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Speaker 4: I felt like that too.

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Speaker 2: That's so interesting because I definitely, you know, brushed as

408
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Speaker 2: a junior and then even to live in the house

409
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Speaker 2: as a senior, so you know, I'm a senior and

410
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Speaker 2: they're all sophomores. And there was absolutely a difference in

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Speaker 2: a good way because I loved the whole pledge class.

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Speaker 4: But that's so interesting.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and I think I don't know the big sort

414
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Speaker 2: of the big point I'm getting out of like just

415
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Speaker 2: talking to you, and if we can convey this is

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Speaker 2: that you don't have to do it as a freshman

417
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Speaker 2: and maybe even better.

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Speaker 5: Right, Yeah, you kind of see this portrayal of sorority

419
00:18:30,920 --> 00:18:35,000
Speaker 5: life through like movies and Instagram and stories you hear

420
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Speaker 5: from older sisters and aunts and moms about like your

421
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Speaker 5: time in a sorority and how it completely changes your

422
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Speaker 5: life and you meet your bridesmaids. And I think I

423
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Speaker 5: had this perception in my head that those are all

424
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Speaker 5: things that happen when you're a freshman, like you meet

425
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Speaker 5: your forever friends when you're a freshman, right, And then

426
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Speaker 5: I show up at cal as a junior. And if

427
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Speaker 5: you had told me three years ago that I'd still

428
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Speaker 5: be making best friends like my junior and senior of

429
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Speaker 5: college with girls, then me that I wouldn't have believed

430
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Speaker 5: you because in your head and think like, oh, you

431
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Speaker 5: meet your friends like right when you get to college

432
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Speaker 5: and those are the people you stick with. But like

433
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Speaker 5: for me, and I've said this phrase to people before

434
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Speaker 5: because I always get the like, oh, you're in a sorority,

435
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Speaker 5: like especially for my friends in France, like they kind

436
00:19:16,280 --> 00:19:19,280
Speaker 5: of give me. They're kind of like, oh, you're a

437
00:19:19,320 --> 00:19:22,520
Speaker 5: sorority girl. Being in a sorority to me is the

438
00:19:22,560 --> 00:19:24,520
Speaker 5: gift that keeps on giving. Like that's the phrase I

439
00:19:24,640 --> 00:19:27,119
Speaker 5: use because like you meet people and you become friends

440
00:19:27,119 --> 00:19:29,320
Speaker 5: with people, and it's amazing, and then you're like I

441
00:19:29,359 --> 00:19:32,359
Speaker 5: can already see myself Like when I graduate in May,

442
00:19:33,000 --> 00:19:36,480
Speaker 5: I've already been meeting DG alum who are like, oh

443
00:19:36,520 --> 00:19:38,480
Speaker 5: my god, Like I want to chat, like how is

444
00:19:38,480 --> 00:19:41,160
Speaker 5: your time? Like everyone it's like a seriously the community.

445
00:19:41,800 --> 00:19:44,879
Speaker 5: It's you feel that sense of like everyone was happy

446
00:19:44,920 --> 00:19:46,600
Speaker 5: to be a part of it, and everyone's happy to

447
00:19:46,640 --> 00:19:49,200
Speaker 5: continue to give back to it. And we have moms

448
00:19:49,200 --> 00:19:51,439
Speaker 5: who come in and come to our chapter meetings and

449
00:19:51,480 --> 00:19:53,680
Speaker 5: talk to us and like share their experiences and talk

450
00:19:53,680 --> 00:19:56,320
Speaker 5: about their jobs and like help us with like networking,

451
00:19:56,800 --> 00:19:59,160
Speaker 5: like events and things like that. Like there's so much

452
00:19:59,440 --> 00:20:02,800
Speaker 5: to offer that It's not just that thing you do

453
00:20:02,880 --> 00:20:04,720
Speaker 5: as a freshman to make friends. It's like you can

454
00:20:04,760 --> 00:20:07,439
Speaker 5: do it whenever it works for you, and you still

455
00:20:07,560 --> 00:20:10,639
Speaker 5: feel that like amazing return, Like there's all there's so

456
00:20:10,760 --> 00:20:13,000
Speaker 5: much that keeps on being given to you.

457
00:20:13,040 --> 00:20:15,359
Speaker 2: I guess yeah, I love everything about that and it

458
00:20:15,480 --> 00:20:16,680
Speaker 2: just because I'm a negative human.

459
00:20:16,720 --> 00:20:18,960
Speaker 4: Is there anything about it that you didn't like? Not

460
00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:19,520
Speaker 4: really much.

461
00:20:20,600 --> 00:20:22,720
Speaker 5: I was trying to think about that. I was I've

462
00:20:22,720 --> 00:20:26,920
Speaker 5: been thinking, honestly, this is gonna sound really dumb. The

463
00:20:27,760 --> 00:20:30,280
Speaker 5: only thing that I would say as a negative is

464
00:20:30,640 --> 00:20:33,240
Speaker 5: the out of body experience you have when you're a

465
00:20:33,320 --> 00:20:36,359
Speaker 5: junior and you step into a frat like I would

466
00:20:37,520 --> 00:20:40,600
Speaker 5: I would go to initially when I joined that first semester,

467
00:20:40,760 --> 00:20:42,639
Speaker 5: I would go to events with the girls in my

468
00:20:42,720 --> 00:20:45,480
Speaker 5: PC who are all freshmen, because like it's a bonding

469
00:20:45,520 --> 00:20:48,440
Speaker 5: thing and it's fun, and like your chapter president kind

470
00:20:48,440 --> 00:20:50,280
Speaker 5: of tells you it's required to like go to these

471
00:20:50,480 --> 00:20:53,440
Speaker 5: social events. And I show up and I'm like, I

472
00:20:53,640 --> 00:20:57,040
Speaker 5: feel old, Like I feel weird than I'm like at

473
00:20:57,080 --> 00:21:00,159
Speaker 5: a frat. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, like twenty twenty one,

474
00:21:00,200 --> 00:21:02,520
Speaker 5: and I'm like, I shouldn't. Like it's kind of the

475
00:21:02,560 --> 00:21:04,399
Speaker 5: sense of like the target audience, Like I am not

476
00:21:04,440 --> 00:21:06,920
Speaker 5: the target audience for this type of event, and that's

477
00:21:06,960 --> 00:21:09,960
Speaker 5: completely fine, and it's I can it's fun because I'm

478
00:21:09,960 --> 00:21:12,840
Speaker 5: with my like my best friends and we're having fun whatever.

479
00:21:12,920 --> 00:21:15,440
Speaker 5: But I'd say that's the only thing that like has

480
00:21:15,480 --> 00:21:17,760
Speaker 5: never it never got like easier.

481
00:21:18,160 --> 00:21:20,160
Speaker 2: I get that I never like going into the frat

482
00:21:20,200 --> 00:21:23,920
Speaker 2: houses period. So but wait, but in terms of rush though,

483
00:21:23,960 --> 00:21:25,679
Speaker 2: is there anything just that.

484
00:21:25,400 --> 00:21:28,679
Speaker 5: That honestly like the recruitment process for me? I think

485
00:21:28,840 --> 00:21:33,560
Speaker 5: the only thing that felt weird was like, I really

486
00:21:33,560 --> 00:21:35,640
Speaker 5: try to live my life in like a very honest,

487
00:21:36,280 --> 00:21:39,760
Speaker 5: authentic way, and I felt guilty and almost kind of

488
00:21:39,800 --> 00:21:42,280
Speaker 5: like it's a weird feeling to go to houses that

489
00:21:42,320 --> 00:21:44,080
Speaker 5: you know, right off the bat you just don't click with.

490
00:21:44,119 --> 00:21:46,760
Speaker 5: And there's nothing wrong with that, Like, there's absolutely nothing

491
00:21:46,760 --> 00:21:49,600
Speaker 5: wrong with being because I I'm really lucky.

492
00:21:49,640 --> 00:21:49,919
Speaker 6: I was.

493
00:21:50,000 --> 00:21:51,960
Speaker 5: I went through the recruitment process, and then this past

494
00:21:52,000 --> 00:21:53,800
Speaker 5: fall I was a part of the recruitment process, so

495
00:21:53,880 --> 00:21:55,639
Speaker 5: I was on the other side of it. It was

496
00:21:55,720 --> 00:21:59,200
Speaker 5: really interesting to see, like there are certain houses you

497
00:21:59,240 --> 00:22:01,200
Speaker 5: just don't click with. And on one end of it,

498
00:22:01,240 --> 00:22:02,879
Speaker 5: when you're going through recruitment, you kind of feel like

499
00:22:02,920 --> 00:22:04,240
Speaker 5: you need to fake it, and you kind of feel

500
00:22:04,240 --> 00:22:06,280
Speaker 5: like you need to still like give them your best

501
00:22:06,280 --> 00:22:07,800
Speaker 5: and give them your all because you don't want to

502
00:22:07,840 --> 00:22:09,760
Speaker 5: be rude, you don't want to like act like you

503
00:22:09,800 --> 00:22:12,399
Speaker 5: don't care. But then on the other end of it,

504
00:22:12,440 --> 00:22:17,080
Speaker 5: when you are recruiting. It's really heart wrenching to see

505
00:22:17,119 --> 00:22:19,600
Speaker 5: girls that you know are amazing and would be friends

506
00:22:19,600 --> 00:22:21,359
Speaker 5: with any day of the week and are awesome, but

507
00:22:21,400 --> 00:22:24,480
Speaker 5: it's almost like you kind of need to make these

508
00:22:24,560 --> 00:22:27,200
Speaker 5: like judgment calls of like are they the best fit

509
00:22:27,240 --> 00:22:30,800
Speaker 5: for us? But also are we the best fit for them?

510
00:22:31,200 --> 00:22:33,800
Speaker 5: Like can we do? Would they love our house as

511
00:22:33,880 --> 00:22:36,159
Speaker 5: much as we think they might love this house? And

512
00:22:36,240 --> 00:22:38,280
Speaker 5: so it's kind of like that was always the weirdest

513
00:22:38,280 --> 00:22:39,679
Speaker 5: part for me on both ends of it was like

514
00:22:39,720 --> 00:22:43,399
Speaker 5: the mind not mind games that sounds like dramatic, but

515
00:22:43,440 --> 00:22:44,960
Speaker 5: like the behind the scenes of like.

516
00:22:46,359 --> 00:22:47,359
Speaker 4: No, I get it, believe me.

517
00:22:47,880 --> 00:22:51,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, because you're you are sort of weeding people

518
00:22:51,920 --> 00:22:54,400
Speaker 2: out and weeding people in, and it's a it's a strategy.

519
00:22:54,480 --> 00:22:57,040
Speaker 4: What did you enjoy more being on which side of it?

520
00:22:57,359 --> 00:23:01,560
Speaker 5: Definitely going through recruitment, Yeah, like being the cause. I

521
00:23:01,600 --> 00:23:04,480
Speaker 5: love I love to chat, I love like, I love

522
00:23:04,960 --> 00:23:08,359
Speaker 5: I love a like random stranger interaction, I love an

523
00:23:08,359 --> 00:23:10,680
Speaker 5: elevator pitch like I It's just kind of just my thing.

524
00:23:10,680 --> 00:23:13,439
Speaker 5: I'm very extra good and I enjoy it, so I

525
00:23:13,480 --> 00:23:17,840
Speaker 5: almost I actually had a Snapchat story during the whole

526
00:23:17,880 --> 00:23:19,719
Speaker 5: week of recruitment that I added some of my like

527
00:23:19,800 --> 00:23:22,080
Speaker 5: hometown friends and my friends friends on and I like

528
00:23:22,080 --> 00:23:24,720
Speaker 5: would post a little like outfit checks, like this is

529
00:23:24,720 --> 00:23:26,600
Speaker 5: what I'm wearing today, this is what the round is.

530
00:23:26,600 --> 00:23:28,320
Speaker 5: And then I would after each house, I would like

531
00:23:28,480 --> 00:23:31,520
Speaker 5: take a picture and be like, oh, my gosh, had

532
00:23:31,520 --> 00:23:34,119
Speaker 5: the best conversation about this, like love just also to

533
00:23:34,160 --> 00:23:38,200
Speaker 5: help me remember everything, right. But I remember doing that

534
00:23:38,359 --> 00:23:41,080
Speaker 5: and being like, honestly, this is like really good practice

535
00:23:41,119 --> 00:23:43,919
Speaker 5: for like awkward conversations that you Yeah. I was like,

536
00:23:43,960 --> 00:23:47,600
Speaker 5: this is good, like interview network, like great awkward practice.

537
00:23:48,200 --> 00:23:50,480
Speaker 5: And so I kind of interpreted the whole week, especially

538
00:23:50,480 --> 00:23:52,240
Speaker 5: coming into it as a junior, I was like, this

539
00:23:52,280 --> 00:23:54,840
Speaker 5: is good just like life experience. Like I'm not seeing

540
00:23:54,840 --> 00:23:56,480
Speaker 5: this as like the end will be all because I'm

541
00:23:56,520 --> 00:23:59,040
Speaker 5: already feeling so good in myself as a junior in

542
00:23:59,080 --> 00:24:00,720
Speaker 5: college and in the friends that I have that it

543
00:24:01,680 --> 00:24:04,040
Speaker 5: it wasn't everything to me, which I almost think that's

544
00:24:04,080 --> 00:24:06,600
Speaker 5: also maybe a bit of advice. I almost think that

545
00:24:06,680 --> 00:24:09,080
Speaker 5: maybe taking some of the pressure off that like it'll

546
00:24:09,119 --> 00:24:11,520
Speaker 5: work out. It always does, And people say that and

547
00:24:11,560 --> 00:24:13,080
Speaker 5: you think it's a joke and you think it's cliche,

548
00:24:13,160 --> 00:24:15,960
Speaker 5: but it really really does, like it always finds a

549
00:24:15,960 --> 00:24:17,840
Speaker 5: way to work itself out. You might not end up

550
00:24:17,880 --> 00:24:19,479
Speaker 5: in the house that you thought you were gonna be in,

551
00:24:19,520 --> 00:24:22,040
Speaker 5: but you will find your people regardless. You might not

552
00:24:22,080 --> 00:24:24,480
Speaker 5: even end up in a house at all, and you

553
00:24:24,520 --> 00:24:26,600
Speaker 5: will go to a different route in college, or you'll

554
00:24:26,600 --> 00:24:29,520
Speaker 5: still be friends with girls and sororities, but you just

555
00:24:29,520 --> 00:24:31,560
Speaker 5: won't be a part of it. Like it will always

556
00:24:31,600 --> 00:24:33,800
Speaker 5: work itself out. And I think when I was going

557
00:24:33,840 --> 00:24:36,800
Speaker 5: through the recruitment process as a junior, I just felt

558
00:24:36,840 --> 00:24:39,639
Speaker 5: that sense of like, I'm gonna take from this what

559
00:24:39,720 --> 00:24:41,560
Speaker 5: I can get and I'm not going to stress about

560
00:24:41,560 --> 00:24:43,399
Speaker 5: all the other things. Like it's just like I was, like,

561
00:24:43,440 --> 00:24:46,400
Speaker 5: it's just gonna be fun, Like it's just gonna be practiced.

562
00:25:00,440 --> 00:25:04,280
Speaker 2: All right, you guys. So now we are bringing in Grace. Hi, Grace, Hi,

563
00:25:04,480 --> 00:25:04,879
Speaker 2: how are you?

564
00:25:04,960 --> 00:25:05,680
Speaker 4: How are you good?

565
00:25:05,720 --> 00:25:08,880
Speaker 2: How are you doing good? We're talking about rush, the good,

566
00:25:08,920 --> 00:25:12,760
Speaker 2: the bad, the ugly. And I believe, for my little

567
00:25:12,800 --> 00:25:16,160
Speaker 2: notes here that you actually were not a huge fan

568
00:25:16,320 --> 00:25:17,879
Speaker 2: of the rush process.

569
00:25:18,600 --> 00:25:22,239
Speaker 3: I was not. I have kind of mixed feelings, right,

570
00:25:23,080 --> 00:25:26,719
Speaker 3: So I my freshman year of college was twenty twenty,

571
00:25:27,000 --> 00:25:31,000
Speaker 3: so obviously when I was Rushing, it was very different

572
00:25:31,320 --> 00:25:35,040
Speaker 3: than other people's experience because we did it all online.

573
00:25:35,160 --> 00:25:37,480
Speaker 3: It was via Zoom, and I just feel like it's

574
00:25:37,480 --> 00:25:40,280
Speaker 3: harder to connect with people that way, and especially when

575
00:25:40,280 --> 00:25:44,160
Speaker 3: you're making such a big decision on a house, it's

576
00:25:44,200 --> 00:25:46,679
Speaker 3: hard to not be in that environment and get to

577
00:25:46,760 --> 00:25:48,399
Speaker 3: interact with people face to face.

578
00:25:48,880 --> 00:25:49,120
Speaker 4: Yeah.

579
00:25:49,200 --> 00:25:51,080
Speaker 3: I feel like that kind of threw a wrench in

580
00:25:51,200 --> 00:25:57,760
Speaker 3: my experience initially and going through Zoom recruitment just it

581
00:25:57,760 --> 00:25:59,920
Speaker 3: didn't end up going very well for me. I got

582
00:26:00,040 --> 00:26:02,080
Speaker 3: dropped by a lot of the houses, and I took

583
00:26:02,119 --> 00:26:05,119
Speaker 3: it all very personally because I did care about it

584
00:26:05,160 --> 00:26:08,560
Speaker 3: a lot and I really wanted to get into, especially

585
00:26:08,600 --> 00:26:10,640
Speaker 3: at the time, like what I considered a top house.

586
00:26:10,680 --> 00:26:12,680
Speaker 3: I cared so much about that freshman year.

587
00:26:13,000 --> 00:26:13,560
Speaker 4: What is it called?

588
00:26:13,560 --> 00:26:15,320
Speaker 2: What are they called top tier? They did call it

589
00:26:15,320 --> 00:26:17,320
Speaker 2: that when I went the top Yeah.

590
00:26:16,920 --> 00:26:24,040
Speaker 3: Like top house or tier house. Yeah. And I feel

591
00:26:24,040 --> 00:26:28,280
Speaker 3: like after it not going well the first time and

592
00:26:28,680 --> 00:26:31,080
Speaker 3: having kind of a year of distance from it, I

593
00:26:31,160 --> 00:26:33,600
Speaker 3: initially thought I would never do it again. But I

594
00:26:33,640 --> 00:26:36,840
Speaker 3: did end up deciding to go through with Rush again

595
00:26:37,320 --> 00:26:40,960
Speaker 3: sophomore year after not goeting in the first time and

596
00:26:41,080 --> 00:26:43,399
Speaker 3: I will say I had a much better experience the

597
00:26:43,440 --> 00:26:46,720
Speaker 3: second time because we got to do it in person.

598
00:26:47,000 --> 00:26:51,399
Speaker 3: I felt like I got a more cohesive vibe of

599
00:26:51,400 --> 00:26:53,479
Speaker 3: each of the houses, and I had already made some

600
00:26:53,520 --> 00:26:57,920
Speaker 3: friends in each one, which made it really a better experience.

601
00:26:58,080 --> 00:27:00,720
Speaker 3: Just having connections, I think is so important when it

602
00:27:00,760 --> 00:27:05,760
Speaker 3: comes to rush, and so I think the second time

603
00:27:05,880 --> 00:27:08,920
Speaker 3: doing it redeems itself a little bit. But I don't

604
00:27:08,960 --> 00:27:12,399
Speaker 3: know the whole thing. For me, it just felt very

605
00:27:13,800 --> 00:27:17,480
Speaker 3: judgmental and you kind of feel like this spotlight is

606
00:27:17,520 --> 00:27:21,360
Speaker 3: put on you, and I don't know, it was an

607
00:27:21,359 --> 00:27:22,800
Speaker 3: interesting experience.

608
00:27:23,400 --> 00:27:26,480
Speaker 2: Can you give any dove any like specific memories of

609
00:27:26,520 --> 00:27:29,280
Speaker 2: it where you know you just felt like you were

610
00:27:30,000 --> 00:27:31,240
Speaker 2: being judged or.

611
00:27:32,400 --> 00:27:34,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, I feel like I can think of two examples.

612
00:27:34,960 --> 00:27:35,200
Speaker 6: One.

613
00:27:36,080 --> 00:27:37,879
Speaker 3: I don't know how it works at other schools, but

614
00:27:37,960 --> 00:27:40,240
Speaker 3: at the school that I was at, the first round

615
00:27:40,240 --> 00:27:43,240
Speaker 3: of recruitment, you actually don't talk to the girls at all.

616
00:27:43,680 --> 00:27:48,560
Speaker 3: You submit a slide with a picture or a couple

617
00:27:48,520 --> 00:27:51,000
Speaker 3: of pictures of you, and then you answer these three

618
00:27:51,119 --> 00:27:55,880
Speaker 3: questions and all the girls in the sorties go through

619
00:27:55,920 --> 00:27:58,600
Speaker 3: these slides, and then the first round of recruitment is

620
00:27:58,640 --> 00:28:01,040
Speaker 3: them going through the slides and pick girls that they

621
00:28:01,119 --> 00:28:05,200
Speaker 3: want back based on those, and then from a potential

622
00:28:05,200 --> 00:28:08,480
Speaker 3: new member's perspective, you watch a video of each sorority

623
00:28:09,080 --> 00:28:12,400
Speaker 3: and you kind of rank them based on the vibe

624
00:28:12,440 --> 00:28:14,080
Speaker 3: of the video and like where you think you might

625
00:28:14,119 --> 00:28:18,120
Speaker 3: fit in best. And I feel like, because they did

626
00:28:18,119 --> 00:28:21,120
Speaker 3: it that way, it feels very impersonal and like they're

627
00:28:21,160 --> 00:28:22,840
Speaker 3: just looking at a picture of you and kind of

628
00:28:22,920 --> 00:28:27,520
Speaker 3: ruling you out and you can't get a feel for

629
00:28:27,560 --> 00:28:28,800
Speaker 3: the person really at all.

630
00:28:29,119 --> 00:28:32,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think that sounds hideous if I'm being honest,

631
00:28:33,040 --> 00:28:35,000
Speaker 2: Like it's like, Okay, we're judging you on your looks.

632
00:28:35,119 --> 00:28:37,960
Speaker 3: Go yeah, absolutely, And I mean you know that these

633
00:28:37,960 --> 00:28:41,120
Speaker 3: girls are using Instagram and TikTok and social media just

634
00:28:41,360 --> 00:28:44,320
Speaker 3: kind of stock people beforehand too. And so I think

635
00:28:44,600 --> 00:28:47,160
Speaker 3: for me, what made me feel really judged off the

636
00:28:47,160 --> 00:28:51,720
Speaker 3: bat was like almost like how impersonal the first round was,

637
00:28:52,200 --> 00:28:54,720
Speaker 3: and that's your first impression, you know, and if you.

638
00:28:54,640 --> 00:28:56,560
Speaker 4: Can't redeem some of the houses you want to.

639
00:28:56,680 --> 00:28:58,880
Speaker 3: Yeah, I got dropped by a lot of them, especially

640
00:28:58,920 --> 00:29:01,200
Speaker 3: the first time that I rush, And honestly, the second

641
00:29:01,240 --> 00:29:03,320
Speaker 3: time that I rushed, I got more. I dropped by

642
00:29:03,400 --> 00:29:06,360
Speaker 3: more than I expected. To as well, and I think

643
00:29:06,720 --> 00:29:10,560
Speaker 3: it's hard when you can't make your own first impression.

644
00:29:10,720 --> 00:29:14,640
Speaker 3: It feels like you're just ruling people out too early.

645
00:29:14,720 --> 00:29:16,719
Speaker 2: I think it's so interesting also just talking to you

646
00:29:16,800 --> 00:29:20,520
Speaker 2: and looking at you, and you're clearly you're pretty, and

647
00:29:20,560 --> 00:29:24,680
Speaker 2: you're clearly sweet and smart in all of that, right, So,

648
00:29:24,960 --> 00:29:28,400
Speaker 2: but I'm sure it does take a toll. You're putting

649
00:29:28,400 --> 00:29:30,200
Speaker 2: your picture out there and somebody saying no, I don't

650
00:29:30,240 --> 00:29:33,600
Speaker 2: want you, which is hard for me to imagine looking

651
00:29:33,600 --> 00:29:36,240
Speaker 2: at you, but it happens to everyone totally.

652
00:29:36,360 --> 00:29:39,400
Speaker 3: It's hard not to take personal, especially it's such a

653
00:29:39,440 --> 00:29:41,600
Speaker 3: pivotal time in your life where you're coming into this

654
00:29:41,720 --> 00:29:45,280
Speaker 3: new environment. You're probably moving states or moving out of

655
00:29:45,280 --> 00:29:48,000
Speaker 3: your home for the first time. I think you're more

656
00:29:48,520 --> 00:29:50,640
Speaker 3: likely to take things personal. And I know that that's

657
00:29:50,680 --> 00:29:52,320
Speaker 3: kind of where I was at when I was eighteen

658
00:29:52,400 --> 00:29:54,720
Speaker 3: years old, So I think that that first round, just

659
00:29:54,720 --> 00:29:57,000
Speaker 3: the way that they did it at my school, to me,

660
00:29:57,240 --> 00:29:59,880
Speaker 3: felt a little bit more judgmental. And then I feel

661
00:29:59,880 --> 00:30:03,960
Speaker 3: like within Russian stuff, you know, your conversations can go

662
00:30:04,000 --> 00:30:06,200
Speaker 3: a million different ways. And the house that I ended

663
00:30:06,280 --> 00:30:09,240
Speaker 3: up in I had great conversations with and I didn't

664
00:30:09,240 --> 00:30:12,160
Speaker 3: feel judged for a second. But some people like to

665
00:30:12,240 --> 00:30:16,920
Speaker 3: ask more invasive questions about boys or parties and stuff

666
00:30:16,960 --> 00:30:19,200
Speaker 3: like that, and those kind of conversations, I feel like

667
00:30:21,400 --> 00:30:24,680
Speaker 3: LUNs can get blurred and people can misinterpret things and

668
00:30:24,960 --> 00:30:28,000
Speaker 3: it feels give an example, there was one house that

669
00:30:28,080 --> 00:30:31,640
Speaker 3: I talked to, and this was when I rushed sophomore

670
00:30:31,680 --> 00:30:34,040
Speaker 3: year the second time, and they were like, so, how

671
00:30:34,040 --> 00:30:36,520
Speaker 3: many boys have you hooked up with since you've been

672
00:30:36,560 --> 00:30:37,120
Speaker 3: at school?

673
00:30:37,680 --> 00:30:37,880
Speaker 6: Wow?

674
00:30:38,040 --> 00:30:41,320
Speaker 3: I was like, first of all, what kind of questions?

675
00:30:41,360 --> 00:30:44,440
Speaker 3: Why isn't that? Second of all, yeah, what are you

676
00:30:44,520 --> 00:30:46,280
Speaker 3: gonna take from that?

677
00:30:47,240 --> 00:30:47,920
Speaker 4: Yes, exactly?

678
00:30:48,000 --> 00:30:51,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, like what about that adds value to me or

679
00:30:51,840 --> 00:30:53,400
Speaker 3: something like that? You know, it's weird.

680
00:30:53,480 --> 00:30:55,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, we had a guess before you who said that

681
00:30:56,000 --> 00:30:59,920
Speaker 2: there were three bees that she couldn't talk about. Boy,

682
00:31:00,960 --> 00:31:04,440
Speaker 2: the Bible, and maybe Bose or something. Yeah.

683
00:31:04,760 --> 00:31:06,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, they ask those questions anyways, And I feel like

684
00:31:06,960 --> 00:31:09,760
Speaker 3: it's always those kind of questions that make you feel like, oh,

685
00:31:10,200 --> 00:31:11,920
Speaker 3: is this somewhere I want to be If they're judging

686
00:31:11,920 --> 00:31:13,880
Speaker 3: me based off of these things, you know, I mean.

687
00:31:13,960 --> 00:31:15,600
Speaker 2: What are you supposed to say, Oh, my god, I

688
00:31:15,640 --> 00:31:17,440
Speaker 2: have been with so many boys? I can't even keep

689
00:31:17,480 --> 00:31:20,680
Speaker 2: track or like, no, what do you want me to say?

690
00:31:20,720 --> 00:31:21,160
Speaker 4: Exactly?

691
00:31:21,280 --> 00:31:23,520
Speaker 3: Exactly? It's hard because I feel like you can't really

692
00:31:23,520 --> 00:31:24,760
Speaker 3: give a right answer.

693
00:31:24,440 --> 00:31:27,280
Speaker 7: To that question right right, right, because.

694
00:31:27,080 --> 00:31:28,760
Speaker 3: Judgment can be placed either way.

695
00:31:28,920 --> 00:31:32,920
Speaker 2: Do you feel like after you know you got rejected

696
00:31:32,920 --> 00:31:36,280
Speaker 2: from the first round or whatever from did your mood change?

697
00:31:36,320 --> 00:31:36,400
Speaker 5: Like?

698
00:31:36,480 --> 00:31:38,520
Speaker 4: Was it harder for you then to like?

699
00:31:38,640 --> 00:31:39,240
Speaker 5: I just know.

700
00:31:40,760 --> 00:31:44,880
Speaker 2: Sometimes in life, right, if we get rejected, it sets

701
00:31:44,880 --> 00:31:48,040
Speaker 2: a tone, Like if you're having an experience like this,

702
00:31:48,240 --> 00:31:50,200
Speaker 2: right and it doesn't go well at the beginning, it

703
00:31:50,240 --> 00:31:51,800
Speaker 2: can set a tone for the rest of it, and

704
00:31:51,800 --> 00:31:54,200
Speaker 2: you could feel more nervous, more insecure.

705
00:31:54,200 --> 00:31:55,760
Speaker 4: Do you feel like it that's what happened.

706
00:31:56,040 --> 00:31:58,520
Speaker 3: Yeah, I do feel like that's kind of what happened.

707
00:31:58,560 --> 00:32:02,720
Speaker 3: I remember freshmen when I rushed. That kind of did

708
00:32:02,760 --> 00:32:04,280
Speaker 3: set the tone for me. I got dropped by a

709
00:32:04,280 --> 00:32:07,080
Speaker 3: lot of houses initially, and I was like, oh, wow,

710
00:32:07,520 --> 00:32:11,200
Speaker 3: already my expectations have not been met. I'm really thrown

711
00:32:11,280 --> 00:32:13,800
Speaker 3: for a loop. I'm taking it personal, And I feel

712
00:32:13,800 --> 00:32:16,440
Speaker 3: like that kind of snowballed into maybe my attitude throughout

713
00:32:16,480 --> 00:32:19,320
Speaker 3: the rest of Rush, which in turn ended up being

714
00:32:19,360 --> 00:32:22,440
Speaker 3: a huge life lesson for me when I redid Rush

715
00:32:22,480 --> 00:32:25,560
Speaker 3: sophomore year, and I feel like that time maybe what

716
00:32:25,760 --> 00:32:27,880
Speaker 3: pushed me through to the end or what made me

717
00:32:27,920 --> 00:32:30,920
Speaker 3: more successful in it, was the fact that I kind

718
00:32:30,960 --> 00:32:34,040
Speaker 3: of realized, like, Okay, maybe people will help me out

719
00:32:34,080 --> 00:32:36,160
Speaker 3: in the beginning, but that doesn't mean that I can't

720
00:32:36,240 --> 00:32:38,840
Speaker 3: redeem myself in the conversations that I have later on,

721
00:32:39,040 --> 00:32:42,080
Speaker 3: or keep an open mind to houses that maybe I

722
00:32:42,120 --> 00:32:45,880
Speaker 3: didn't expect having great connections with and stuff like that.

723
00:32:46,080 --> 00:32:50,680
Speaker 3: So I feel like to your point, yeah, I definitely

724
00:32:51,120 --> 00:32:53,920
Speaker 3: feel like that could have been maybe a downfall for

725
00:32:53,960 --> 00:32:56,200
Speaker 3: me the first time I went through Rush and somewhere

726
00:32:56,200 --> 00:32:58,960
Speaker 3: where I was actually able to redeem myself the second time.

727
00:33:00,000 --> 00:33:02,680
Speaker 2: All right, And what advice would you give to our

728
00:33:02,720 --> 00:33:05,320
Speaker 2: listeners who have had a similar experience they didn't get,

729
00:33:05,840 --> 00:33:08,600
Speaker 2: you know, to be able to not only do it,

730
00:33:08,720 --> 00:33:11,840
Speaker 2: but also sort of maybe even enjoy the rush process

731
00:33:12,680 --> 00:33:13,680
Speaker 2: the second time around.

732
00:33:14,040 --> 00:33:17,680
Speaker 3: I think that the second time around, it's almost like

733
00:33:17,960 --> 00:33:20,440
Speaker 3: you really have nothing to lose. You know, you're going

734
00:33:20,480 --> 00:33:23,160
Speaker 3: into this again, You've already created a life for yourself

735
00:33:23,200 --> 00:33:27,080
Speaker 3: at school where you are a little more settled with

736
00:33:27,120 --> 00:33:29,960
Speaker 3: your friends hopefully or a little more settled in a

737
00:33:30,040 --> 00:33:33,120
Speaker 3: new city or whatever the case may be. And so

738
00:33:33,240 --> 00:33:36,280
Speaker 3: it's like, if you've already built ground for yourself and

739
00:33:36,400 --> 00:33:40,600
Speaker 3: gotten through freshman year, maybe without having been in a sorority.

740
00:33:40,800 --> 00:33:44,160
Speaker 3: I think it's just realizing, like, Okay, I feel secure

741
00:33:44,200 --> 00:33:47,680
Speaker 3: in what I've built beforehand. I'm going into this and

742
00:33:47,720 --> 00:33:50,720
Speaker 3: if it goes well, awesome. But if it doesn't, I

743
00:33:50,840 --> 00:33:52,680
Speaker 3: know that I'm going to be able to recover. So

744
00:33:52,720 --> 00:33:55,160
Speaker 3: I'd say, like, give yourself credit for what you've already

745
00:33:55,160 --> 00:33:57,560
Speaker 3: been through, because it is kind of hard to feel

746
00:33:57,560 --> 00:33:59,400
Speaker 3: like you're on the outside of something if you didn't

747
00:33:59,400 --> 00:34:03,520
Speaker 3: get into a sorority freshman year. And I think that

748
00:34:04,320 --> 00:34:07,760
Speaker 3: it's all about just like being grateful for what you

749
00:34:07,800 --> 00:34:11,640
Speaker 3: do have and keeping in mind that it's not a

750
00:34:11,719 --> 00:34:13,799
Speaker 3: huge loss if it doesn't go well, but it could

751
00:34:13,800 --> 00:34:15,600
Speaker 3: be a great addition if it does go right.

752
00:34:16,120 --> 00:34:18,920
Speaker 4: I love that. Thanks well.

753
00:34:19,080 --> 00:34:21,520
Speaker 2: So the house that you're in when you got into,

754
00:34:22,320 --> 00:34:25,200
Speaker 2: was that a house that you expected or you wanted

755
00:34:25,320 --> 00:34:27,759
Speaker 2: to get into or was did that was that you know?

756
00:34:27,920 --> 00:34:29,880
Speaker 2: Part like the first time around the set versus the

757
00:34:29,920 --> 00:34:30,760
Speaker 2: second time around.

758
00:34:31,719 --> 00:34:34,560
Speaker 3: I remember really liking this house the first time around,

759
00:34:34,560 --> 00:34:36,120
Speaker 3: and I was kind of shocked that I got dropped

760
00:34:36,120 --> 00:34:38,160
Speaker 3: by them, so they were definitely on my radar when

761
00:34:38,160 --> 00:34:40,880
Speaker 3: I went back sophomore year, although a lot of my

762
00:34:40,880 --> 00:34:43,480
Speaker 3: friends were in different houses, so I was like, do

763
00:34:43,520 --> 00:34:45,040
Speaker 3: I want to do what my friends want to do

764
00:34:45,200 --> 00:34:47,400
Speaker 3: or what I maybe want to join this house that

765
00:34:47,880 --> 00:34:49,880
Speaker 3: I don't have as many friends in. But I remember

766
00:34:49,920 --> 00:34:53,520
Speaker 3: really liking and Yeah, I ended up just kind of

767
00:34:53,560 --> 00:34:57,840
Speaker 3: having the best conversations there and it definitely was like

768
00:34:57,920 --> 00:35:00,120
Speaker 3: one that was towards the top of my list. I

769
00:35:00,160 --> 00:35:02,120
Speaker 3: was really happy to get it, and I feel like

770
00:35:03,239 --> 00:35:06,440
Speaker 3: I was really happy to then make more connections within it,

771
00:35:06,480 --> 00:35:09,120
Speaker 3: and the girls were great and it ended up being

772
00:35:09,120 --> 00:35:10,360
Speaker 3: a really, really fun.

773
00:35:11,600 --> 00:35:11,799
Speaker 8: Time.

774
00:35:12,160 --> 00:35:14,600
Speaker 4: Yeah, is there any my last question?

775
00:35:15,000 --> 00:35:17,440
Speaker 2: You think there's anything you could suggest that would make

776
00:35:17,520 --> 00:35:23,040
Speaker 2: RUSH a better experience? You know, it's interesting obviously, you know,

777
00:35:23,120 --> 00:35:26,680
Speaker 2: doing it the way you did submitting pictures freshman year,

778
00:35:27,400 --> 00:35:29,440
Speaker 2: I'm thinking you would say that's not a good idea.

779
00:35:30,040 --> 00:35:32,560
Speaker 4: Yeah, I wouldn't suggest that, But anything.

780
00:35:32,280 --> 00:35:34,160
Speaker 2: Else you any twist or things that you think could

781
00:35:34,160 --> 00:35:36,000
Speaker 2: make it a better process.

782
00:35:36,640 --> 00:35:39,000
Speaker 3: I feel like, kind of what I was talking about earlier,

783
00:35:39,440 --> 00:35:42,439
Speaker 3: attitude and perspective is everything. If you're someone who's going

784
00:35:42,480 --> 00:35:46,040
Speaker 3: into rush. It's just really important, I think, mostly to

785
00:35:46,120 --> 00:35:49,640
Speaker 3: keep an open mind because yeah, and I think I

786
00:35:49,640 --> 00:35:52,879
Speaker 3: would also recommend not really talking to other people about it.

787
00:35:53,239 --> 00:35:55,640
Speaker 3: I think maybe freshman year where I got so in

788
00:35:55,680 --> 00:35:59,480
Speaker 3: my head about it was we're on these zooms, it's COVID,

789
00:35:59,640 --> 00:36:01,960
Speaker 3: my room is sitting next to me on zooms, and

790
00:36:02,000 --> 00:36:04,319
Speaker 3: it's all going really well for her, and then we're

791
00:36:04,360 --> 00:36:07,400
Speaker 3: spending hours talking about it after and everyone in my

792
00:36:07,480 --> 00:36:09,560
Speaker 3: dorm is like, what house do you like? What house

793
00:36:09,560 --> 00:36:10,600
Speaker 3: do you think you're getting into?

794
00:36:11,040 --> 00:36:11,200
Speaker 6: This?

795
00:36:11,360 --> 00:36:11,520
Speaker 2: What?

796
00:36:11,640 --> 00:36:17,440
Speaker 3: That? And I think just being mindful of canceling out

797
00:36:17,480 --> 00:36:19,759
Speaker 3: some of that noise and maybe not asking all the

798
00:36:19,840 --> 00:36:22,399
Speaker 3: questions to other people, or not giving away too much

799
00:36:22,440 --> 00:36:25,560
Speaker 3: information to other people, and just keeping it more of

800
00:36:25,600 --> 00:36:27,880
Speaker 3: a personal experience. I feel like that would have been

801
00:36:27,960 --> 00:36:29,880
Speaker 3: kind of helpful for me, because at the end of

802
00:36:29,920 --> 00:36:32,000
Speaker 3: the day, it is your decision, and you never want

803
00:36:32,040 --> 00:36:34,799
Speaker 3: other people's opinions or judgment to cloud your own.

804
00:36:35,120 --> 00:36:37,720
Speaker 2: Okay, I think that is great advice. I think, actually,

805
00:36:37,719 --> 00:36:41,200
Speaker 2: I'm thrilled that that's what you are offering to our listeners.

806
00:36:41,239 --> 00:36:45,360
Speaker 2: I think that it sounds to me as an older person,

807
00:36:45,440 --> 00:36:47,720
Speaker 2: like that's going to be something really helpful that.

808
00:36:47,560 --> 00:36:48,840
Speaker 3: Our listeners helped send you.

809
00:36:49,080 --> 00:37:03,919
Speaker 7: So yeah, I hope well done.

810
00:37:05,160 --> 00:37:08,760
Speaker 2: All right, guys, So now we have Molly. Hi, Mollie,

811
00:37:08,760 --> 00:37:09,920
Speaker 2: thank you so much for coming on.

812
00:37:10,560 --> 00:37:11,400
Speaker 5: Yeah.

813
00:37:11,480 --> 00:37:15,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, we're talking about Rush, and we've had callers that

814
00:37:15,320 --> 00:37:18,680
Speaker 2: have loved it and callers that have hated it. And

815
00:37:19,600 --> 00:37:22,080
Speaker 2: this must be about me somehow that I want to

816
00:37:22,120 --> 00:37:24,240
Speaker 2: talk more to the ones that hated it than once

817
00:37:24,320 --> 00:37:26,839
Speaker 2: it loved it. I don't know why I feel that way,

818
00:37:26,880 --> 00:37:28,680
Speaker 2: but I just think it's, first all, it's a very

819
00:37:28,680 --> 00:37:31,160
Speaker 2: hard thing, and I think talking about that is going

820
00:37:31,200 --> 00:37:33,799
Speaker 2: to help a lot of our listeners because I think that,

821
00:37:34,160 --> 00:37:37,480
Speaker 2: you know, people have all kinds of experiences, and I

822
00:37:37,520 --> 00:37:41,600
Speaker 2: think especially talking to people like you who didn't like

823
00:37:41,680 --> 00:37:45,200
Speaker 2: Rush and still ended up in a sorority. So tell

824
00:37:45,239 --> 00:37:48,960
Speaker 2: me a little bit about your experience. How did it

825
00:37:49,000 --> 00:37:51,560
Speaker 2: go and why wasn't it the best?

826
00:37:52,560 --> 00:37:53,960
Speaker 3: Yeah?

827
00:37:54,000 --> 00:37:56,399
Speaker 7: So I didn't love it.

828
00:37:56,760 --> 00:38:01,040
Speaker 8: I actually really didn't like it because I felt like

829
00:38:02,200 --> 00:38:06,320
Speaker 8: they were trying to have me be a certain way,

830
00:38:06,560 --> 00:38:11,279
Speaker 8: talk a certain way, and it also was kind of

831
00:38:11,920 --> 00:38:15,160
Speaker 8: it felt degrading the way that they chose who was

832
00:38:15,239 --> 00:38:17,360
Speaker 8: gonna talk the most, who was going to be on

833
00:38:17,440 --> 00:38:21,520
Speaker 8: the floor, it was very clear the system that they

834
00:38:21,560 --> 00:38:22,240
Speaker 8: were doing.

835
00:38:23,360 --> 00:38:24,920
Speaker 3: Whether it was looks or.

836
00:38:24,920 --> 00:38:30,240
Speaker 8: It was I don't know, like they just they wanted

837
00:38:30,239 --> 00:38:34,719
Speaker 8: to put like the certain people forward, and it was

838
00:38:35,360 --> 00:38:40,320
Speaker 8: kind of degrading. It wasn't a fair wasn't a fair

839
00:38:40,680 --> 00:38:48,959
Speaker 8: representation of the entire group, so that I didn't love.

840
00:38:50,239 --> 00:38:54,000
Speaker 8: But yeah, mostly I would say it was they wanted

841
00:38:54,080 --> 00:38:56,000
Speaker 8: us to use a specific dialogue.

842
00:38:56,040 --> 00:38:58,440
Speaker 3: And I love to talk to people.

843
00:38:58,480 --> 00:39:00,520
Speaker 8: I love to get to know people, and I know

844
00:39:00,680 --> 00:39:06,560
Speaker 8: that people enjoy me as well, so I was excited

845
00:39:06,560 --> 00:39:06,960
Speaker 8: to do this.

846
00:39:07,080 --> 00:39:10,080
Speaker 6: At first, I couldn't discuss a lot.

847
00:39:09,880 --> 00:39:13,000
Speaker 8: Of the topics that would be fun to talk about,

848
00:39:13,960 --> 00:39:18,640
Speaker 8: which I can understand to an extent, but it definitely

849
00:39:18,640 --> 00:39:22,480
Speaker 8: felt like they were trying to put something forward that

850
00:39:22,600 --> 00:39:24,480
Speaker 8: wasn't specific to the individual.

851
00:39:24,840 --> 00:39:28,319
Speaker 6: In my experience, we weren't allowed to talk about boys, booze,

852
00:39:28,520 --> 00:39:31,600
Speaker 6: and write the bees and I can't remember the third bee,

853
00:39:31,600 --> 00:39:35,960
Speaker 6: but it would maybe, yeah, okay, that could be it,

854
00:39:36,040 --> 00:39:38,800
Speaker 6: but and like I didn't need to talk about boys

855
00:39:39,000 --> 00:39:43,600
Speaker 6: or booze or anything, but that's one for example that

856
00:39:44,920 --> 00:39:47,440
Speaker 6: we weren't allowed to. But it definitely made it uncomfortable

857
00:39:47,440 --> 00:39:50,200
Speaker 6: when they would bring it up and we had to

858
00:39:50,239 --> 00:39:54,120
Speaker 6: like redirect a conversation. It was just a very forced

859
00:39:54,239 --> 00:39:57,640
Speaker 6: discussion and it just made me feel very unnatural. And

860
00:39:57,680 --> 00:40:03,960
Speaker 6: then I'm stressed. The other onemen are stressed, and everyone's

861
00:40:04,000 --> 00:40:06,280
Speaker 6: kind of putting on a face or putting on a show,

862
00:40:06,920 --> 00:40:13,160
Speaker 6: and it's just becomes like inauthentic versus, like the versus,

863
00:40:13,200 --> 00:40:18,840
Speaker 6: like the fraternities. It's just a lot more laid back,

864
00:40:18,960 --> 00:40:23,480
Speaker 6: and I think it shows who the boys are.

865
00:40:24,000 --> 00:40:28,000
Speaker 2: More than the rush process was yeah right, yeah, so

866
00:40:28,880 --> 00:40:30,000
Speaker 2: I just want to make sure I have it.

867
00:40:30,160 --> 00:40:30,800
Speaker 4: I understand.

868
00:40:30,880 --> 00:40:34,000
Speaker 2: So they would tell you don't talk about boys, and

869
00:40:34,040 --> 00:40:38,160
Speaker 2: then you would have these girls bringing up boys and

870
00:40:38,200 --> 00:40:40,040
Speaker 2: you had it like was did they know.

871
00:40:40,000 --> 00:40:41,080
Speaker 4: That they were doing that to you?

872
00:40:41,239 --> 00:40:43,600
Speaker 2: Is it purposeful that they were trying to see how

873
00:40:43,640 --> 00:40:46,279
Speaker 2: you could evade a question or or you don't even know,

874
00:40:46,360 --> 00:40:46,960
Speaker 2: Maybe you don't know.

875
00:40:47,280 --> 00:40:49,839
Speaker 8: I think they would forget, because I do know that

876
00:40:50,560 --> 00:40:56,799
Speaker 8: they have the same rules, so they're not supposed to

877
00:40:56,800 --> 00:40:58,600
Speaker 8: bring it up. But I think they would maybe forget,

878
00:40:58,680 --> 00:41:03,560
Speaker 8: or maybe they would try and show that they're oh, whoops,

879
00:41:03,600 --> 00:41:05,880
Speaker 8: I didn't know, but I do like to party, or

880
00:41:05,880 --> 00:41:09,160
Speaker 8: like they would want to say something right, And I

881
00:41:09,200 --> 00:41:15,560
Speaker 8: do know that some of the sororities would not completely

882
00:41:15,600 --> 00:41:17,920
Speaker 8: follow the rules, and then I think that was like

883
00:41:18,080 --> 00:41:21,240
Speaker 8: a good look, but not a good.

884
00:41:21,040 --> 00:41:23,600
Speaker 4: Look for so complicated, right, It's.

885
00:41:23,440 --> 00:41:26,760
Speaker 8: Like, yeah, it's just kind of ridiculous.

886
00:41:26,480 --> 00:41:29,160
Speaker 4: Yeaheah, it could just be I know it.

887
00:41:30,200 --> 00:41:34,080
Speaker 2: We're talking to, you know, quite a number of you

888
00:41:34,160 --> 00:41:36,200
Speaker 2: guys today and a lot of people that really just

889
00:41:36,239 --> 00:41:39,360
Speaker 2: loved every single minute of it and then those that didn't.

890
00:41:39,600 --> 00:41:42,560
Speaker 2: And I can kind of, you know, relate to both

891
00:41:42,680 --> 00:41:46,319
Speaker 2: because it's very hard to be your authentic self in

892
00:41:46,360 --> 00:41:49,279
Speaker 2: these situations, right when you're trying to please people and

893
00:41:49,320 --> 00:41:54,000
Speaker 2: you're trying to put forth your best self, not even

894
00:41:54,120 --> 00:41:58,080
Speaker 2: knowing what that really is. Would you have any advice

895
00:41:58,239 --> 00:42:01,960
Speaker 2: for our listeners that either well, you know, some of

896
00:42:01,960 --> 00:42:03,799
Speaker 2: our listeners they've already there in now or they're going

897
00:42:03,840 --> 00:42:06,840
Speaker 2: to go through spring, or like any advice for girls

898
00:42:06,840 --> 00:42:09,320
Speaker 2: that are hating it and feeling all of these ways

899
00:42:09,360 --> 00:42:11,600
Speaker 2: about it, and you know, is there anything you could

900
00:42:11,680 --> 00:42:13,280
Speaker 2: suggest that could help?

901
00:42:14,719 --> 00:42:17,839
Speaker 6: I mean, I would say to be yourself. I know,

902
00:42:17,880 --> 00:42:21,440
Speaker 6: like everyone says that, but I really mean it, like

903
00:42:23,600 --> 00:42:26,080
Speaker 6: you just want to put yourself forward and show who

904
00:42:26,080 --> 00:42:30,600
Speaker 6: you are and the right sorority who sees the value

905
00:42:30,600 --> 00:42:34,840
Speaker 6: in you will come. But it's also at the same time,

906
00:42:35,440 --> 00:42:37,560
Speaker 6: the system is so messed up that even if you

907
00:42:37,600 --> 00:42:40,360
Speaker 6: are showing your best self, you never know like what

908
00:42:41,160 --> 00:42:43,880
Speaker 6: the qualifications are that they need, Like maybe your grades

909
00:42:43,920 --> 00:42:45,719
Speaker 6: aren't it, or if you're in a sport and they

910
00:42:45,760 --> 00:42:49,880
Speaker 6: won't they don't want people in a sport, or I

911
00:42:49,880 --> 00:42:52,600
Speaker 6: don't know, like there's a lot of things that will

912
00:42:52,640 --> 00:42:55,000
Speaker 6: get you denied and it has nothing to do with

913
00:42:55,400 --> 00:42:58,080
Speaker 6: you or like your personality or whatever.

914
00:42:58,760 --> 00:43:00,560
Speaker 3: So I would definitely say I do.

915
00:43:00,520 --> 00:43:06,120
Speaker 6: Not take it personal whatsoever, because it's literally the weirdest

916
00:43:06,160 --> 00:43:09,440
Speaker 6: system ever. So that's kind of my advice, I guess.

917
00:43:09,640 --> 00:43:11,600
Speaker 2: I mean, I think it's so great because we're having again,

918
00:43:11,640 --> 00:43:15,000
Speaker 2: we're having these girls on here that loved it, and

919
00:43:15,040 --> 00:43:18,319
Speaker 2: I think that that's helpful for our listeners because they

920
00:43:18,360 --> 00:43:21,600
Speaker 2: can get excited about the process, and you know, also

921
00:43:21,719 --> 00:43:26,680
Speaker 2: just some girls like you that are very honest and

922
00:43:26,719 --> 00:43:30,200
Speaker 2: real about it and say it wasn't the best, but

923
00:43:30,239 --> 00:43:32,279
Speaker 2: in the end, I'm glad I did it, you know,

924
00:43:32,440 --> 00:43:36,640
Speaker 2: so we can kind of help maybe set expectations here.

925
00:43:37,120 --> 00:43:38,359
Speaker 4: And I know it's true.

926
00:43:38,400 --> 00:43:40,560
Speaker 2: It's like that's advice for at my age, you know,

927
00:43:40,600 --> 00:43:44,120
Speaker 2: that's I get the advice just be yourself. I don't

928
00:43:44,120 --> 00:43:46,880
Speaker 2: even know at your age, I didn't know who myself was.

929
00:43:47,120 --> 00:43:49,919
Speaker 2: So that was not an easy thing, right And now

930
00:43:49,920 --> 00:43:52,120
Speaker 2: it's like the buzzwords are all about it's all, you know,

931
00:43:52,239 --> 00:43:57,720
Speaker 2: be authentic. And at again, now at age fifty seven,

932
00:43:58,040 --> 00:44:01,040
Speaker 2: I'm way more aware of who I am, and it's

933
00:44:01,080 --> 00:44:04,360
Speaker 2: way easier for me to be authentically Jennifer. But I

934
00:44:04,360 --> 00:44:07,000
Speaker 2: think that's probably hard for a lot of people, you know,

935
00:44:07,040 --> 00:44:12,000
Speaker 2: at eighteen and but just as opposed to I mean,

936
00:44:12,040 --> 00:44:16,360
Speaker 2: I just remember wanting everyone to like me so badly,

937
00:44:16,440 --> 00:44:18,120
Speaker 2: and it didn't matter if I knew I wasn't going

938
00:44:18,160 --> 00:44:20,000
Speaker 2: to even me in the house, like I don't, this

939
00:44:20,080 --> 00:44:22,360
Speaker 2: is not the house for me. I still it was

940
00:44:22,360 --> 00:44:26,520
Speaker 2: so much pressure, pressure to try to impress everyone totally.

941
00:44:27,040 --> 00:44:29,759
Speaker 4: Yeah, And so I mean that that aspect of it

942
00:44:29,800 --> 00:44:31,120
Speaker 4: can be really difficult.

943
00:44:31,200 --> 00:44:35,160
Speaker 6: So I do think about like I totally understand that,

944
00:44:35,360 --> 00:44:37,640
Speaker 6: or like you don't really know who you are. But

945
00:44:37,719 --> 00:44:40,799
Speaker 6: I think when I say be yourself, it's like in

946
00:44:40,840 --> 00:44:46,360
Speaker 6: that moment because I feel like I feel like the

947
00:44:46,400 --> 00:44:49,279
Speaker 6: way to be authentic is just to kind of be

948
00:44:49,600 --> 00:44:54,279
Speaker 6: vulnerable and like stay because I feel like each week,

949
00:44:54,280 --> 00:44:56,760
Speaker 6: I agree, I'm in a different place each week.

950
00:44:57,000 --> 00:45:01,120
Speaker 8: Literally, So like if I'm just vulnera about what I'm

951
00:45:01,160 --> 00:45:05,799
Speaker 8: feeling in my experience when this happened or read question

952
00:45:06,120 --> 00:45:09,640
Speaker 8: like I don't know who I am, but like that's

953
00:45:09,680 --> 00:45:10,480
Speaker 8: what I'm feeling, and this.

954
00:45:10,480 --> 00:45:12,040
Speaker 2: Is what that's like the truth of what's going on

955
00:45:12,080 --> 00:45:16,200
Speaker 2: with you. So I tell that to my daughter, and

956
00:45:16,520 --> 00:45:19,480
Speaker 2: I've learned that I'm so impressed that you know this

957
00:45:19,600 --> 00:45:23,680
Speaker 2: about yourself because being vulnerable now, after all, you know,

958
00:45:24,600 --> 00:45:29,239
Speaker 2: after going through college and life and marriage and kids,

959
00:45:29,239 --> 00:45:33,839
Speaker 2: and I connect with people most when I'm being vulnerable,

960
00:45:33,960 --> 00:45:36,359
Speaker 2: honest and vulnerable, and I.

961
00:45:36,320 --> 00:45:39,120
Speaker 4: Have found again was off topics.

962
00:45:39,160 --> 00:45:41,719
Speaker 2: So excuse me, but if I had to, you know,

963
00:45:42,239 --> 00:45:44,480
Speaker 2: in part any advice to someone your age, and I'm

964
00:45:44,520 --> 00:45:46,480
Speaker 2: not saying go in and on a first meeting and

965
00:45:46,520 --> 00:45:51,759
Speaker 2: tell everyone your deepest, darkest necessarily, but be comfortable being vulnerable.

966
00:45:51,800 --> 00:45:53,200
Speaker 2: You know, I don't know, I'm really this is the

967
00:45:53,239 --> 00:45:54,879
Speaker 2: whole thing is a lot for me, and you know,

968
00:45:55,360 --> 00:45:59,080
Speaker 2: I am kind of a shy person or whatever it is,

969
00:45:59,120 --> 00:46:01,480
Speaker 2: and not just in during rush, right, but to be

970
00:46:01,480 --> 00:46:03,880
Speaker 2: open because people will almost always at least that's in

971
00:46:03,920 --> 00:46:08,759
Speaker 2: my experience. Then be vulnerable, vulnerable with you, and it's

972
00:46:08,880 --> 00:46:11,759
Speaker 2: really it's a great way to connect. So solve all

973
00:46:11,800 --> 00:46:13,279
Speaker 2: the world's problems here.

974
00:46:13,280 --> 00:46:16,480
Speaker 6: Seriously, right, everyone needs to tune into this and you'll

975
00:46:16,480 --> 00:46:17,000
Speaker 6: fa yes.

976
00:46:16,880 --> 00:46:20,719
Speaker 2: Please, yes please. I loved having you. I'm sorry you

977
00:46:20,719 --> 00:46:23,359
Speaker 2: didn't love Rush, but it sounds like you did love

978
00:46:23,800 --> 00:46:27,919
Speaker 2: being in a sorority absolutely, and you're do any thing now. Yes,

979
00:46:28,360 --> 00:46:30,319
Speaker 2: it all works out, okay, Levy