Speaker 1: The Blaze is going to playte is going to hate
Speaker 1: going to.
Speaker 2: The Mother's going to ball. I don't mind what people
Speaker 2: say you do, but I don't mind what do you
Speaker 2: believe to you?
Speaker 3: Are you leave on getting your mother? Because what they do,
Speaker 3: what they do ain't nothing to do play. They don't
Speaker 3: playing and hate ball shot coming, Welcome back.
Speaker 2: This is good mom's bad choices. I'm Erica and I'm Nila,
Speaker 2: and we're back.
Speaker 3: I feel like we've took her two weeks off. I
Speaker 3: feel like this has been a while. Well, be recorded. Yeah,
Speaker 3: that's what I mean. Yeah, take two weeks off. We're prerecorded. Yeah,
Speaker 3: it wasn't as a like before. It wasn't like VAKA
Speaker 3: like on vacation. You're right, yeah, yeah, is that girl?
Speaker 3: What did it do? I think there's a plane passing.
Speaker 3: There's always a plane passing. Can you hear like the crickets?
Speaker 3: Like the outdoors.
Speaker 2: I wonder have you ever have you ever listened to
Speaker 2: Oprah's Super Soul Sunday podcast or watched it on the
Speaker 2: own networks. She's always outside in her garden, like drinking lemonade.
Speaker 2: There's like the birds like yeah, so I kind of we.
Speaker 3: Know we're doing our own version of the Super Soul
Speaker 3: Sunday Good Monster. That's I was thinking. Maybe it's like
Speaker 3: we're camping.
Speaker 2: Yeah, basically odd. We were out there and there was
Speaker 2: a rat that was Yeah, there's crickets. My backyard is
Speaker 2: very active.
Speaker 3: Why did we take oh, because why did we take
Speaker 3: two weeks off? Oh? You went to Jersey. I went
Speaker 3: to Jersey and you went to Florida. I went to Florida.
Speaker 3: We said, it's like fucking every week because I mean
Speaker 3: I went, like, I feel like I'm in Florida. A
Speaker 3: lot that's going on. I was Florida. It was cool,
Speaker 3: you know. We we were doing work out there and ts. No,
Speaker 3: I'm done with Tinder.
Speaker 2: Although you know.
Speaker 3: I was going to hang out with Jasmine je sitting Jasmine.
Speaker 3: Oh we didn't. We didn't. I didn't have time. We didn't.
Speaker 3: We haven't made it happen. We're gonna hang out.
Speaker 2: Hopefully the next time I go out there and chill,
Speaker 2: maybe I'll get some fetish trainings.
Speaker 3: Oh that would be nice. You could come.
Speaker 2: Sure, that'd be really nice because I always kink it
Speaker 2: up a little more, always step up my game.
Speaker 3: I'm always into like tips and tricks. If you guys
Speaker 3: have any tips and tricks, you please also don't tell
Speaker 3: me those.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think all women continues some act like speaking
Speaker 2: of tips and tricks, can you please send us your
Speaker 2: horries book service announcement.
Speaker 3: We're gonna start with us at the top.
Speaker 2: We're trying to do like a fun, hoary Halloween episodes,
Speaker 2: so we need like all the top horries.
Speaker 4: Yeah, we need all your hotels, scary scary horror stories,
Speaker 4: juicy ones, ones you wish you never that never happened, embarrassing.
Speaker 3: We need an effer an episode, which is I know
Speaker 3: it's asking a lot. We need on enough for well,
Speaker 3: we need at least like six good ones. Yeah, but
Speaker 3: yeah six to ten.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, I fucking just you could pick me
Speaker 2: up from like the crab Shack or whatever the fuck
Speaker 2: b by Crabby crab on fan eyes right across from
Speaker 2: the thatches that.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 2: I love crab and ship and like the eating pill.
Speaker 2: But I fucking smell like occasion. You do you actually
Speaker 2: smell like I still smell the kids spurt? Is that
Speaker 2: what it is?
Speaker 3: Spicy peppery? She got in my car and I thought
Speaker 3: she had food with her and she was like, no,
Speaker 3: it's me, but listen, the thing is like I love it,
Speaker 3: but every time I go, I'm like, do I don't
Speaker 3: have anything to do tonight?
Speaker 2: And I was like, you can't do it.
Speaker 3: No, you ain't going. You better not go try to
Speaker 3: go to house. No like that.
Speaker 2: Goddamn sure, No, you need like a two day details.
Speaker 2: You didn't like sit in Vinegar like it's so strong.
Speaker 2: I couldn't live in New Orleans. That would just be
Speaker 2: a occasions. Okay, anyway, sorry I took myself off the beat.
Speaker 3: How was journey? Okay? So yeah, Florida was cool?
Speaker 2: How kinks and tricks? Speaking of kinks and tricks, oh Flora? Okay, okay, okay,
Speaker 2: I say you actually have a kink or a trick?
Speaker 3: Oh? Do I have a king trip? Yeah? A kinky trick? Yeah,
Speaker 3: like any tips or kinky tricks?
Speaker 2: Like to add, I'm always into what other women's kinky
Speaker 2: trips like chips are because then you can implement them
Speaker 2: in your bedroom and like spice of that maybe something
Speaker 2: you didn't know about.
Speaker 3: Are you asking me what of mine right now? Currently?
Speaker 5: Oh?
Speaker 3: My god, put the spot.
Speaker 2: I just want to know if you're some shit I
Speaker 2: don't I'm not doing and if anybody else has any,
Speaker 2: I mean we should share them, right because they you like,
Speaker 2: step up everybody's secks. Games is like a community situation.
Speaker 3: I mean, I always like, I think role play is
Speaker 3: really fun. I like to role play. Some people are
Speaker 3: I'm down for it. Some people are you gotta feel
Speaker 3: it out.
Speaker 2: I am into role play too, but I feel like
Speaker 2: that that sad suggestion kind of scares people and they can.
Speaker 3: Come off so I know, what do you mean, come
Speaker 3: off wrong? Not come off wrong? Like I don't think.
Speaker 3: I like, I don't think everybody can get into it,
Speaker 3: and of course not.
Speaker 2: They're not an a star actress, action, a working actor,
Speaker 2: an active actor.
Speaker 3: You're not an active actor. You may not want to
Speaker 3: be engaged in such.
Speaker 2: A we literally someone recently, an actor, said that they're
Speaker 2: an active actor and I was dead, like, what do
Speaker 2: you mean.
Speaker 3: An active okay?
Speaker 2: Anyway, okay, because there was a time like I was
Speaker 2: in a relationship and I was like, oh, like that's
Speaker 2: role play.
Speaker 3: Like halfway through he was like, all right, like I
Speaker 3: don't want to but I want to fuck you. This
Speaker 3: is like he couldn't.
Speaker 2: He couldn't like, yeah, yeah, I think role play is
Speaker 2: like Okay, maybe this isn't a good kink trick because
Speaker 2: it's more for I feel like, for me, I do
Speaker 2: a deeper in relationship, like it's not like straight off
Speaker 2: the bat day one. But maybe maybe if you did,
Speaker 2: maybe if you did, it would like, you know, open
Speaker 2: up the relationship to be like more like it would
Speaker 2: be a broader, open relationship earlier, because.
Speaker 3: Why do we wait till to de fan to do
Speaker 3: kinky ship. You're right, maybe I need to step up
Speaker 3: my role play again with happy Bay.
Speaker 2: But then I also would be scared to just like
Speaker 2: go out to character and hope that the first catch
Speaker 2: catches alone. You know, Okay, you know what I think
Speaker 2: would be a good way intro love. I've never known this,
Speaker 2: but I've always wanted to intro level role play, Like
Speaker 2: I meant to do this fuck and like get a
Speaker 2: hotel and then maybe like you go down to the
Speaker 2: bar first, or like he goes or meet somewhere and
Speaker 2: just schedule the meet and then.
Speaker 3: Act like you're, oh, like you're new, You're like like
Speaker 3: you're like a couple, a stranger. That's like level one, right, Yeah,
Speaker 3: it makes it easier.
Speaker 2: I think you kind of give a idea just like
Speaker 2: an idea for like a married couple a relationship for
Speaker 2: a long time time to spice it up. Speaking of this,
Speaker 2: I have a hair dressesdn't tell me this crazy story
Speaker 2: that she was at the buzz stop and this this
Speaker 2: woman pulled up on.
Speaker 3: Her and was like, oh did that like like I
Speaker 3: have you so beautiful?
Speaker 2: Like I have a guy friend that is single, and
Speaker 2: I think you guys like some weard shit like this
Speaker 2: she got. She goes back and forth with this woman,
Speaker 2: texting they made up at a bar her in this
Speaker 2: guy meets stuff and she's like, it's obvious that they
Speaker 2: are married have a relationship.
Speaker 3: And then if she's just steady playing and this is
Speaker 3: this friend that she's trying to like pass her on,
Speaker 3: took her up with and it's just a screaky crazy
Speaker 3: so she wanted her to suck her man, but she
Speaker 3: kept saying she said they kept sucking up and saying like, babe,
Speaker 3: did she did?
Speaker 2: Wait? Did the wife or girlfriend end up wanting to
Speaker 2: be a part of it? I need to like get
Speaker 2: this girl because this is a random haare dresser told
Speaker 2: me the story, but there's not going to but she
Speaker 2: I forgot. I think she finally was like, you know,
Speaker 2: I know what's up.
Speaker 3: I know what you're trying to do. Like I can
Speaker 3: tell that you guys.
Speaker 2: Know each otherday, like you guys are sucking and I
Speaker 2: think that they're like finally admitted that, like yeah, they're
Speaker 2: just like trying to open up.
Speaker 3: But I thought, wow, what you went to level of
Speaker 3: ten and that's kind of hot, Like who knows to what?
Speaker 3: Like to what extreme will you keep your your sex
Speaker 3: life active?
Speaker 2: It's coming soon topic, yeah, maybe to any extreme because
Speaker 2: then it's you know, it's kind of like that kinky
Speaker 2: little secret just between you guys.
Speaker 3: You know what's going on. And actually she kind of
Speaker 3: got preyed upon for sure.
Speaker 2: Yes, that's very yeah, I want to do that. That's
Speaker 2: kind of like that's sexy about it's sexy for them
Speaker 2: for that. For her, it's like girl, like I like
Speaker 2: turned on by like.
Speaker 3: My partner.
Speaker 2: How far shall we go together? We're of your predators,
Speaker 2: let's get But I was like, damn, that's what I'm
Speaker 2: thought about about the couple. Oh my god, Oh but
Speaker 2: that's what that's what I mean. Okay, obviously they went
Speaker 2: to Great lumps Cape their marriage popping, but that's what
Speaker 2: I mean.
Speaker 3: Like, that's why we should share with you. What's your
Speaker 3: trick tip?
Speaker 2: Oh tip, I told you what I think level like
Speaker 2: a nice entry level. Well no, but else is that
Speaker 2: you know that's gone wrong for me? I kind of
Speaker 2: did that sort of in my last relationship. I rented
Speaker 2: a hotel. It wasn't like a secret like that, but
Speaker 2: it was like I went to a hotel room. I
Speaker 2: like got all these sexy games we could play, like spice.
Speaker 3: It up, and it did not go well. Why he
Speaker 3: was like offended? Guys are stupid. It was off immediately.
Speaker 2: Huh you cut that off immediately? No, okay, it was
Speaker 2: it was a rough patch offended. Yeah, I mean no,
Speaker 2: you shouldn't be offended. She actually offended. I'm trying.
Speaker 3: That was a sign. Yeah, I don't know why I
Speaker 3: see it earlier.
Speaker 2: I think like sex ships just like a surprise pussy wax,
Speaker 2: if you don't always do that, like hey, look what
Speaker 2: I've done today, you know, look at this or like that,
Speaker 2: or like if you were like an outfit that you
Speaker 2: can't tell or something sexy underneath and then like let
Speaker 2: that person in.
Speaker 3: Just even like that.
Speaker 2: It's a little bit sexy if you've been in like
Speaker 2: a like a you know, same old same, to give
Speaker 2: them those panties that vibrant you got to go to dinner.
Speaker 3: What you seen those? Give yourself the panties and you
Speaker 3: give them to your partner so you're out with people.
Speaker 3: He can press the bike.
Speaker 2: Oh oh yeah, I control the vibration. No, oh my god,
Speaker 2: that's sounds fun. Right where you get those? Oh okay,
Speaker 2: that's interesting.
Speaker 3: But I feel like you can be like vibrating.
Speaker 2: Loud, polightly pull them down. I think I saw that
Speaker 2: in the movie Clear Any real person have this experience,
Speaker 2: But it sounds like a grind. Its sound a good idea.
Speaker 2: I think I'm going to do that, even like we're
Speaker 2: pulling out a video camera.
Speaker 3: It can be kind of sexy.
Speaker 2: I definitely you have to really trust that person, though,
Speaker 2: well you know what. I did it at Dang Bay
Speaker 2: and Jersey speaking of my trip, and he did it
Speaker 2: on my phone and I was like, this seems incriminating.
Speaker 3: He's like, it's your phone and I was like, proceeds
Speaker 3: to put an extra work, open the secret drop box
Speaker 3: right for blackmail. I'll get you, mecga.
Speaker 2: You want revenge porn? Totally kidding. Happened, Yeah, I found
Speaker 2: myself before, but I have to like for hours. It
Speaker 2: was like a regular thing that place your ship. Oh
Speaker 2: yeah yeah, but that was a lot of information. Sorry,
Speaker 2: I did it all.
Speaker 3: Every time. Call me coverport, just call me kid. This one,
Speaker 3: this one is from the part.
Speaker 2: Well hence that if you guys never heard this, this
Speaker 2: one episode where I tell Horry where my dad turned
Speaker 2: on my computer that was connected to my TV. This
Speaker 2: is like the most embarrassing episode. And literally the thing is,
Speaker 2: it's all the way across the screen and my head
Speaker 2: is caught to the side, full thing, full throttle up
Speaker 2: and down on it, and my dad's like steady tenntion
Speaker 2: in computer off and he can't and I'm just going
Speaker 2: to town.
Speaker 3: It's like my face, closest flock, the biggest fun on.
Speaker 2: The TV and a penis and that's like my favorite
Speaker 2: hor Almost I forgot about that, but okay, so that's
Speaker 2: maybe that's not a good kink chure.
Speaker 3: Don't fuck no if you're gonna record.
Speaker 2: Oh, I know one we ever observed to killing it,
Speaker 2: but I'm sure we're thinking about the one we needed
Speaker 2: submission And I think it's a sexy if you're a guy,
Speaker 2: is like at work or like not with you or
Speaker 2: send them out a video playing with yourself.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, that's like you do that all the time.
Speaker 3: I've done it.
Speaker 5: Yeah yeah, yeah, Oh my god, we're high. Obviously I'm crying.
Speaker 3: I'm crying. Okay, I'm gonta make.
Speaker 2: Up of this.
Speaker 3: Jesus Christ. Okay, wow, okay, anyway, I don't know if
Speaker 3: you guys that's funny, but yeah, okay. Oh oh, so
Speaker 3: I went to Jersey. We scheduled to have uh therapy.
Speaker 3: She said, do what you want to go?
Speaker 2: Yeah, screwity is some screty. No, I'm anyway, whatever fu it.
Speaker 3: We did Molly therapy. We got a hotel room and
Speaker 3: we did Molly therapy. Well that was what we called it.
Speaker 3: We just did. When when you told me that, I
Speaker 3: was was.
Speaker 2: I was really curious how that was gonna go. Because
Speaker 2: I don't feel like Molly's the drug to have therapy.
Speaker 3: I think it is. I think mushrooms more. Really have
Speaker 3: you ever done mushrooms?
Speaker 2: I have, but yeah, Molly's more like it doesn't make
Speaker 2: you tell like a lot of your true feelings. Molly,
Speaker 2: I think, yeah, I think it's just immense love, which
Speaker 2: which yes you I mean that, which if you're someone
Speaker 2: you love and it's amazing. But I feel like it's
Speaker 2: it's like one of those like one trick pony drugs.
Speaker 2: It's like always a mense love or it's like you're small,
Speaker 2: you're in a bad it's that bad. Yeah, I mean
Speaker 2: it was actually a pretty lightweight.
Speaker 3: Wow, it was fine.
Speaker 2: It's that you want to go out, you want to yeah, exactly,
Speaker 2: trying to therapy, Yeah, yeah, fun. Yeah, we've been like
Speaker 2: even tell me everything. Let's talk about that dancing, yeah,
Speaker 2: because I think it hit like a little bit before
Speaker 2: we left and we were.
Speaker 3: Just like dancing a little bit, like alright, but to
Speaker 3: go okay, kissing, to go to dinner and.
Speaker 6: Ate not.
Speaker 2: I'm not why did we even come, but you know what,
Speaker 2: we like walked It was like ocean like I don't
Speaker 2: know how you say, like New Jersey like uh, edge
Speaker 2: water or not Edgewater like you know, prank cross with
Speaker 2: the fucking cityre no, like yeah yeah yeah, and we
Speaker 2: like walked along the water. It was a brisk fall weather,
Speaker 2: the moon was shining. That was like a bit therapeutic
Speaker 2: for like the ten minutes there, and that was nice.
Speaker 2: It was fun.
Speaker 3: We drank and smoked whatever. You know, bad choice is shit.
Speaker 2: But I didn't have my kid diverybing now because my
Speaker 2: kid was not Molly therapy.
Speaker 3: So like you me, Yeah, that's pretty much it.
Speaker 2: Oh and oh this.
Speaker 3: Weekend, you're gonna talk about a weekend? Oh yeah, this
Speaker 3: weekend I went to my friend.
Speaker 2: My girlfriend was having a huge runway show during LA
Speaker 2: Fashion Week.
Speaker 3: Shout out to the Model Experience.
Speaker 2: Anybody who's aspiring to be a model in somewhere, you
Speaker 2: should definitely go. Yeah, her, her company is legit. If
Speaker 2: you're trying to be a model, get experience. You don't
Speaker 2: know where to start. You need runway experience. You need headshots,
Speaker 2: you need to look fly a ship, you want cute
Speaker 2: Instagram photos.
Speaker 3: At the Model Experience.
Speaker 2: Anyway, I was one of her shows and h Happy
Speaker 2: Bay was there. Oh oh, I didn't know that he
Speaker 2: was teaching.
Speaker 3: Oh he did. Yeah, Oh, I didn't know that we
Speaker 3: had like five shows that day. He d all all
Speaker 3: shows and uh yeah. So we went there and then
Speaker 3: we were gonna go.
Speaker 2: We were like all we were talking about, like what
Speaker 2: we're gonna do after the celebrates, like someone of her
Speaker 2: biggest shows's ever done. Three hundred models blah blah blah.
Speaker 2: I'm like, okay, we gotta go Sam's because you know,
Speaker 2: a bitch love Sam's. We've talked about not Sam's Club,
Speaker 2: the supermarket, but sam right, just in case anyone thinks
Speaker 2: like rim and they were not talking about Samson Market.
Speaker 2: Were We're talking about Sam's. The strip cluff that's local
Speaker 2: downtown in LN. Yeah, the Sam's hoff b Yeah, it's
Speaker 2: a strip club that I don't frequent, but when I go,
Speaker 2: I go in it's like.
Speaker 3: A monthst the better ones in La went. It's like
Speaker 3: the only one that crazy girls, crazy girls. I hate
Speaker 3: people even say that one so bad. Yeah, there's back downtown.
Speaker 3: I had LA ship clubs. I've never remember Rhino, have you.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's just like classy because they don't have like State.
Speaker 2: I don't like classic, like cheatah, I like, well, I
Speaker 2: like classy, right, I like classy ratchet. Yeah, La sucks
Speaker 2: for ship clubs. It's not like if I'm gonna go,
Speaker 2: I guess I go to Sam's.
Speaker 3: But but yeah, So we got out of that and
Speaker 3: then we pulled into Oh. I told Jamila to come
Speaker 3: meet me. I was like, come meet me at like
Speaker 3: two o'clock. That afternoon, We're going to Sam. I was like, yeah,
Speaker 3: it must find Sam. What's going down? So then she
Speaker 3: she's coming. I'd like to ask for all day. She's coming.
Speaker 3: She's like, gabbage, I'm coming. Okay.
Speaker 2: So I pull into Sam's with the happy Bay, who
Speaker 2: is amazing still, and then with Ashley and who else
Speaker 2: my diffriend Ashley and I pull in and the first
Speaker 2: thing I see is my baby Daddy's jeep in the
Speaker 2: parking lot at the strip club.
Speaker 3: And immediately I'm just like, fuck, like I have happy
Speaker 3: with me, Like he doesn't.
Speaker 2: I mean, obviously I'm single, but like he's never really
Speaker 2: we don't talk about me dating. I'm sure he knows
Speaker 2: that I'm dating, obviously, he doesn't inquire, He's never said
Speaker 2: anything about it. And it just felt like immediately I
Speaker 2: felt anxiety. I was like, I don't want to be here.
Speaker 3: This is awkward. Me and him are, you know, on
Speaker 3: and off in a weird place.
Speaker 2: And I just didn't think that the strip club was
Speaker 2: like the right opportunity is that the first time him
Speaker 2: meeting someone in dating, especially him drinking him I know
Speaker 2: you've been drinking.
Speaker 3: I know, it's just not going to be weird. It
Speaker 3: wasn't going to be good. It's just very weird.
Speaker 2: And that was like that first time that like I've
Speaker 2: been encountered with that, with that dilemma. I guess it's
Speaker 2: not a dilemma. It's just like a real life thing
Speaker 2: that's bound to happen. But I'm going to be dating
Speaker 2: someone and at some point my ex is going to
Speaker 2: meet him in some in either a planned capacity or
Speaker 2: an out of the blue one.
Speaker 3: But I just didn't feel like the strip club was
Speaker 3: the appropriate you.
Speaker 2: I mean, at first, I was annoyed because I'm not
Speaker 2: gonna lie like I can only at the house to
Speaker 2: go to strip up and I meant to text you
Speaker 2: and I left and we were just talking about I mean,
Speaker 2: after first.
Speaker 3: I was like, I wouldn't have wanted to defend me.
Speaker 2: I'm so glad that you weren't alone, though I thought
Speaker 2: was like are you yeah, You're lied to be like wait,
Speaker 2: are you alone?
Speaker 3: I'm like, no, yes, baby, baby, I'll be there in
Speaker 3: a second. Okay. Anyway, it was just it was just
Speaker 3: it was weird. It was weird, and.
Speaker 2: It's like, you know, after after we left, Happy Bay
Speaker 2: asked me like, did you not go in there because
Speaker 2: of me like, like it's it because she's like, what
Speaker 2: was that? I'm just curious, and I I could tell
Speaker 2: he was like I feel a little concern, maybe a
Speaker 2: little insecure, but like you know, And then I was like, no,
Speaker 2: it's not not really, it didn't. It doesn't really have
Speaker 2: anything to do with him per se, but it does
Speaker 2: in a way. It's not really him, it's it's what
Speaker 2: he represents like new relationship new, like this is something new,
Speaker 2: you know what I mean.
Speaker 3: It's has nothing to do with him. He is great.
Speaker 2: He would approach a situation in the best way possible.
Speaker 2: He's so loving and great, you know what I mean.
Speaker 3: It's not that, it's just that I also have so
Speaker 3: much respect for him.
Speaker 2: I didn't he doesn't deserve to for this encounter, this
Speaker 2: first encounter with male testosterone and all that, to be
Speaker 2: in a strip club tennes Yeah. Yeah. And baby Daddy
Speaker 2: spent a lot of time in that strip club prior
Speaker 2: to this moment, so he, you know, he is very
Speaker 2: comfortable in there. And I just didn't feel like it
Speaker 2: was like even a fair playing ground of even like
Speaker 2: an introduction to something.
Speaker 3: So that was weird. And now I'm like, what the
Speaker 3: fuck does this look like, like how does this?
Speaker 2: How?
Speaker 3: What is the appropriate time and play to do?
Speaker 2: Because when you said it and me think like, damn,
Speaker 2: will there ever be in time? Well, obviously eventually at
Speaker 2: some point where we're gonna have to be around our
Speaker 2: new dud. Well, he knows you have a dude, I know,
Speaker 2: but like, well, because he lives out of town, the
Speaker 2: likeliness of him ever meeting him is is very slim,
Speaker 2: especially because it's not No, it's not because he'll come
Speaker 2: out here and I know I'm not gonna let you purposely, Yeah,
Speaker 2: why not though he's your man? Like you couldn't just
Speaker 2: like maybe you're dropping Luna off to go to take him.
Speaker 2: Were he wunna come in and stand in the car? Yeah,
Speaker 2: but if he came.
Speaker 3: Outside, you know what I mean? Like you can only
Speaker 3: hide in that situation for song. You shouldn't.
Speaker 2: You shouldn't, Oh my god, seeking this okay? So perfect
Speaker 2: example actually, but not perfect because it's not a thing.
Speaker 2: So obviously I was in Jersey, I had to like,
Speaker 2: you know, I'm facetiming Lou and usually I do. I
Speaker 2: avoid it, like I watch till him alone, and I
Speaker 2: did wait till I was long, But like he started
Speaker 2: coming back up like up the stairs. Well was on
Speaker 2: the phone, wasn't gonna like but I knew be D
Speaker 2: was holding the phone from how because I can actually
Speaker 2: see your face because three year old told a FaceTime
Speaker 2: it's fucking like what is it called a.
Speaker 3: Yeah? So he comes in the camera and he's like, hello,
Speaker 3: what she doing? Hang her out like talking to her.
Speaker 3: And I didn't want to be like no, no, get
Speaker 3: out the.
Speaker 2: Camera, but I was just like I just let it ride,
Speaker 2: and I like sack like moments later, like I waited
Speaker 2: like fifteen seconds for it, and then the phone hung
Speaker 2: up mysteriously and he said this phone night.
Speaker 3: But I know that it was just like he could
Speaker 3: see him. It was awkward.
Speaker 2: That's a preview what that's gonna look like, right, Well,
Speaker 2: I mean he's so mature, That's why I would like, he.
Speaker 3: Probably wouldn't do shit. He probably so quiet. If you
Speaker 3: met Anthony, you probably wouldn't do shit. He wouldn't. He's
Speaker 3: not gonna do shit. But I'm just I just know
Speaker 3: it would be awkward. I mean, I just I can
Speaker 3: totally understand where you're coming from.
Speaker 2: Not wanting to give in that situation in any way
Speaker 2: shape form or fashion, especially.
Speaker 3: At a ship club.
Speaker 2: And it's not like it's not like in passing you're
Speaker 2: about to leave. You just up in there, chilling, sitting
Speaker 2: Sharon looking at it, pissy and drink drinks.
Speaker 3: Like I just have a feeling had I went in
Speaker 3: there like he would have like.
Speaker 1: Went hard with girls in front of me because it's
Speaker 1: hurt right, well yeah, probably yeah, And it's not that
Speaker 1: I it's not that I'm like romantically even have I
Speaker 1: don't have romantic feelings for him anymore really, but just
Speaker 1: I don't need that visual.
Speaker 3: No, nobody wants that visual.
Speaker 2: And you know what, it's not like fresh and new. However,
Speaker 2: you haven't had to see that, right, that is fresh
Speaker 2: and new. That is fresh and new, yeah.
Speaker 3: And yeah, and not that it might not even ever happen.
Speaker 2: That's just like what I was what I didn't want
Speaker 2: to have to be. I didn't want to have to
Speaker 2: see that and experience that with I didn't want him
Speaker 2: to feel my energy shift, right and change. And he
Speaker 2: did anyway, he felt my energy shift when we left,
Speaker 2: and he was like, are you okay? And he was like,
Speaker 2: I want you to know, like if you want to
Speaker 2: go in there like and I don't want me to
Speaker 2: stop you and your friends.
Speaker 3: From having a good time. I was like, me and
Speaker 3: my friends are not gonna have a good time to
Speaker 3: go on because I don't want to be there.
Speaker 2: I would rather I would much rather go somewhere else
Speaker 2: together together, yeah, or just not go at all.
Speaker 3: Right, But anyway, that was interesting. I just it's like
Speaker 3: the first time that that's happened.
Speaker 2: I'm sure like that's happened to many people before, probably
Speaker 2: some of our listeners and stuff. If you have any
Speaker 2: advice as to how you introduce introduce your insignificant other
Speaker 2: or even just someone you're dating to your baby daddy smoothly,
Speaker 2: let me know, right well.
Speaker 3: Then me try to make it seem like it's cool.
Speaker 3: You know, it's so good, Like you know that's that
Speaker 3: I give a fuck.
Speaker 2: You know it's so good, like you'll never have to
Speaker 2: worry about you know, it would be weird a friend
Speaker 2: of like your friend.
Speaker 3: I'm like, I guess anyway, awkward, but it is awkward anyway.
Speaker 3: This weekend we also got our first hater. Yeah we did.
Speaker 3: We got like a friend. We've got a hater. We've
Speaker 3: had a hater before, not like this, though. The other one. Yeah,
Speaker 3: we have like a hater before, but like it was
Speaker 3: my fuck up. Oh wait oh yeah yeah that hard. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 3: is that what you're talking about? Yeah, you're talking about Yeah,
Speaker 3: when I talk about we're like in high school.
Speaker 6: Yeah, at least, well we got a thread of ship
Speaker 6: talking basically about.
Speaker 3: I think it's it's kind of it tickles me a little.
Speaker 2: About us basically talking too freely and openly about sex
Speaker 2: in front of our kids.
Speaker 3: M h. I think that we've been doing this for
Speaker 3: eight months and we've gotten so much love that I'm like,
Speaker 3: I mean, this is the thing, is that I feel
Speaker 3: like I'm careful about what I say in front of
Speaker 3: my daughter, you know, like nobody's gonna be more conscious
Speaker 3: than us, Like of course my daughter is.
Speaker 2: Of course maybe well maybe to some people, I am
Speaker 2: too free with her, you know what I mean, And
Speaker 2: that's fine, But I know what I feel. I know
Speaker 2: that I have good boundaries, and I know that I'm
Speaker 2: teaching her, you know, about sex, body parts and all
Speaker 2: those things, so that it's it shouldn't be an awkward conversation.
Speaker 3: It shouldn't be like some secret conversation.
Speaker 2: Of course I'm not having like like I don't want
Speaker 2: her to be in the room I'm talking about, Like,
Speaker 2: I don't want her to be listening to me talking
Speaker 2: about my like nastiest horror story.
Speaker 3: No, not really, I don't. And how about this, you guys,
Speaker 3: you're not here?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Ho about you're not here? And we pause, we
Speaker 2: edit this shit sometimes. So yeah, it just kind of
Speaker 2: like opened up this conversation. It's bigger conversation for me
Speaker 2: about just how people judge people as parents because and
Speaker 2: I was telling Jamilla this, like I feel like everyone's
Speaker 2: everyone's experience as a parent is so based off of
Speaker 2: whatever they experience growing up, and everyone's experience is unique.
Speaker 2: Every experience is different, and so when you base your
Speaker 2: parenting off of the way you grew up or what
Speaker 2: you saw and you wish you had more of, you know,
Speaker 2: every experience is gonna be tailored and curated differently.
Speaker 3: How about this, who the fuck are you?
Speaker 2: No, there's that too, more like this Chris girl was
Speaker 2: so disrespectful though, Like she was talking about our kids, like, yeah,
Speaker 2: I mean, and of course we put ourselves out there, Okay,
Speaker 2: we do have I mean, yeah, we're very transparent, and
Speaker 2: that's a part of the whole reason why we did
Speaker 2: this is like we're going to do it and be
Speaker 2: honest or not do it, and we obviously our kids
Speaker 2: are a part of it because we're moms and that's inevitable.
Speaker 2: So I'm not like, you know, people like put theirselves
Speaker 2: out there and then I'm surprised and they get criticism.
Speaker 2: I'm not surprised your shocks. People are gonna have their opinions.
Speaker 2: But yeah, like worry about yourself and your parenting, Like.
Speaker 3: That's just the bottom you know, Like that's the bottom line.
Speaker 3: Like who if you felt real concerned.
Speaker 2: This is the funny part is that the this this
Speaker 2: blog that had this stream of comments, The woman who
Speaker 2: wrote the blog post kept commenting like when of the
Speaker 2: people would comment, but like respond, this woman had listened
Speaker 2: to like almost all of our episodes. She's like she
Speaker 2: was like referring to the titles and the names and
Speaker 2: the different guests we had, and I'm like, here's my thing.
Speaker 2: If you have such a problem with my podcast, why
Speaker 2: the fuck are you listening to every single episode?
Speaker 3: If it's such a problem, Right, you like it? Yeah?
Speaker 2: You like just you like it?
Speaker 3: I like it. You're right, just like it because I
Speaker 3: listened to like twenty minutes old podcast. She tried to say,
Speaker 3: like she tried to like, that's why I don't like
Speaker 3: what You're gonna just hate. They just hate. Don't like
Speaker 3: try to be nice and then hate. Like she was like, oh,
Speaker 3: you know, they seem really smart, but like, that's what
Speaker 3: do you take that's how kids turn out fast?
Speaker 2: Actually, dude, kids tearing out fast because the moms are
Speaker 2: not having the conversation. It's completely avoided. They're not educated
Speaker 2: in those manners. They're basically the fuck oblivious. But one
Speaker 2: thing is for sure, and few things. I'm sorry we're
Speaker 2: not talking about it to our three year olds about specifics,
Speaker 2: but they're definitely gonna be exposed and they're definitely gonna
Speaker 2: be knowledgeable and educated, and it's not going to be
Speaker 2: some taboo conversation.
Speaker 3: So you know, I was just really good the whole thing.
Speaker 3: The funny part is like we got a comment that
Speaker 3: referred to like this this some some blog that we've
Speaker 3: never we've never been on. So I'm like, what does
Speaker 3: this comment? What does this mean? I call her like
Speaker 3: do you see this? What does this mean?
Speaker 2: She's like what? I was like, what is this?
Speaker 3: So I come over.
Speaker 2: We're like trying to go on the internet and figure
Speaker 2: it out. And if you can see us to school, Like,
Speaker 2: just like, how do.
Speaker 3: You work it? What shopping? We gotta sign up for
Speaker 3: a membership. Yeah, we have to sign up for a memory.
Speaker 2: So people signed up for a membership to get talk
Speaker 2: share about other people. Yeah you go, you can through
Speaker 2: great lens to just talk some shit.
Speaker 3: Just call your home the fuck Like it's like a member.
Speaker 2: She had to get approved. I don't think I ever
Speaker 2: got approved. I was probably a waiting list calling people
Speaker 2: like you got an account at him?
Speaker 3: Okay. I'm like, maybe if we put it on the Google.
Speaker 2: Googling this shit bag, I'm a pictures two hundred and
Speaker 2: sixty three pages and one topic.
Speaker 3: How will we ever find it? Oh my god, let
Speaker 3: me find it? Like we found it. I was like, what, Okay,
Speaker 3: So the girl who whatever. I don't spend too much
Speaker 3: time on this woman because she is trying pictures. She's trash.
Speaker 2: But that's not even not she didn't even I'm talking
Speaker 2: about the girl. I'm talking about the girl who made
Speaker 2: us aware of this, Like the girl who wrote the
Speaker 2: post on the blog.
Speaker 3: She was she was a hater too, But the one
Speaker 3: who made it aware, made us aware of this. She's
Speaker 3: really the she.
Speaker 2: Was the one who started all of this. She told
Speaker 2: us about it because she wanted to get us round up.
Speaker 2: That's what you know, Like it's those people that like
Speaker 2: plant little seeds if this what was her point of
Speaker 2: She wanted to to know that people were talking about
Speaker 2: us and that she agreed with them, but she likes
Speaker 2: us too.
Speaker 3: Why thank you to that girl? I thank you? Sher
Speaker 3: mom is still listening now, I know she is. Father's
Speaker 3: still listening now. Guess what. It's crash.
Speaker 2: But it's actually, honestly very flattering. I think it's very flattering,
Speaker 2: Like you're listening? Are you went all into our Instagram
Speaker 2: and found this and then proceeded to write long paragraphs
Speaker 2: talking mad Ship in detail because I told her to. Second, Dick,
Speaker 2: I did because I just gonnat believe like all the
Speaker 2: things she said about like Luna and just I can't.
Speaker 3: I just can't believe it. You know, she sounded like
Speaker 3: someone doesn't have a kid. Mommy, I don't want my past.
Speaker 3: It's still in my bulletdouts. I don't want it. Oh
Speaker 3: so you were Is that what you're telling me? Because
Speaker 3: you just told me that you ate it, and I
Speaker 3: was gonna find out that you did it. Okay, we'll
Speaker 3: go get a snack. There's one, there's you know where
Speaker 3: they are. Anyway, it was just it just the whole situation.
Speaker 3: It made me angry at first, and then it made
Speaker 3: me laugh and then I was like, well, you know what,
Speaker 3: we're doing something right, because if you don't have any haters,
Speaker 3: they're not doing nothing. You need a few haters, you
Speaker 3: need a lot of them. So and we now with success,
Speaker 3: the haters come. It's called balance, baby, you know. And
Speaker 3: I think it's great.
Speaker 2: But it just made me realize, like maybe really think about, yeah,
Speaker 2: just how we as women judge each other and judge
Speaker 2: judge other mothers. Mothers judge mothers, baby baby, Okay, you
Speaker 2: have the chicks close the door a little bit. Okay,
Speaker 2: just a little bit, thank you, a little bit more,
Speaker 2: a little.
Speaker 3: Bit more.
Speaker 2: Perfect, perfect, that's great. Just how mothers judge judge other mothers.
Speaker 2: People who aren't mothers judge mothers.
Speaker 3: Because they think that everyone has this idea and the
Speaker 3: type of mother they're going to be. And then you're
Speaker 3: a mother and they are like.
Speaker 2: All my conversations, like you're not going to filter every conversation,
Speaker 2: like something like there's just all these my plans you
Speaker 2: had for motherhood go out the window, and then you
Speaker 2: just do what just comes naturally, and you know, and
Speaker 2: and and like I said, based based off of experience
Speaker 2: from your past and things that you either repeat or
Speaker 2: you want.
Speaker 3: To change or are just habit because of that, you
Speaker 3: know what I mean. So I don't know.
Speaker 2: I just was like all these women in this little
Speaker 2: chat room talking and I'm like, this is like such
Speaker 2: like a microcosm of like what what really happens though,
Speaker 2: because so many women are are these women involves but
Speaker 2: in real life just judging women at the grocery store,
Speaker 2: judging you know, the single mom dropping the kid off
Speaker 2: the scroll. But you know, it's just it's just it's
Speaker 2: just sad and it's crazy because we're I mean, there's
Speaker 2: I've definitely judged mothers too, I've judged people, I've judged parenting.
Speaker 2: I do it now, but I think then from that situation,
Speaker 2: so it made me a little bit more since like
Speaker 2: sensitive about the only the same shot too. Yeah, I
Speaker 2: think that's true. I think that's honest. I definitely have
Speaker 2: been like I have friends and I mean Okay, this
Speaker 2: is another thing for this person. Oh the whatever the
Speaker 2: comments began with. I have friends who have kids who
Speaker 2: are like older and maybe like I know my kid, like,
Speaker 2: my kid's smart and they obviously understand specifics. Probably not
Speaker 2: because these are not words for teaching them or they're
Speaker 2: hearing often, but like, I've been around friends who have
Speaker 2: much older kids.
Speaker 3: Like I have a girlfriend and she's crazy, and she's.
Speaker 2: Like a ten year old boy and she's like, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 2: not sex this month. I'm like, yo, I'm not having
Speaker 2: a conversation with you in front of him, but she
Speaker 2: knows what you're saying. I tell her, like in front
Speaker 2: of him, like, girl, stop, are you really going to
Speaker 2: talk like this right now? And then the fact that
Speaker 2: I'm conscious in front of her kid. I know I'm
Speaker 2: conscious in front of mine.
Speaker 3: You know what I'm saying. Well, I'm gonna kid her. Well,
Speaker 3: I cous in front of my kid, which is not good.
Speaker 3: But my kid is also the cousin police. She tells
Speaker 3: me not to. I mean a Christopher of Iry too.
Speaker 3: I try, I try, I try. It's three years old.
Speaker 2: No, no, no, I mean honestly, Okay, let's think honestly.
Speaker 2: Do you recall any conversations from when you were three,
Speaker 2: or do you call feelings and energy and things that
Speaker 2: were happening.
Speaker 3: I don't recall conversation.
Speaker 2: I can't recall necessarily conversations with feelings and energy that
Speaker 2: we're behind the conversations I do.
Speaker 3: Do you know what I mean? Honestly? If I'm saying
Speaker 3: d I c K in front of her, like she's
Speaker 3: not going to know what that means?
Speaker 2: What I mean?
Speaker 3: I think if you don't even know what that means,
Speaker 3: because I call it the real thing exactly. I mean too,
Speaker 3: like if we're referring to it in real life. If
Speaker 3: I'm showing, like telling you because it's it's it's it's
Speaker 3: a penis, this whole conversation is stupid, This whole thing
Speaker 3: is No.
Speaker 2: I don't think it's stupid though, because so many women
Speaker 2: like don't understand it, And there's probably women right now
Speaker 2: listening to this right now that are like you are
Speaker 2: judging or saying like no, I don't have those conversations,
Speaker 2: or maybe thinking like huh, maybe I should have those conversations.
Speaker 3: Yeah, not have those not like purposely like I'm going
Speaker 3: to talk about pens What a freak I am you know,
Speaker 3: And I was kidding like you know, but no.
Speaker 2: But there's gonna be a realistic approach about the ship
Speaker 2: because guess what if it's not me, it's gonna be
Speaker 2: your homegirl.
Speaker 3: Okay, just stabbed. It's probably the underwi. We're gonna see
Speaker 3: your Victoria's secret. Hate the hate your products, hate your products,
Speaker 3: anyway you can rude yourself. I've ever been ventory secret
Speaker 3: mode the wings. I don't want to be Maybe I
Speaker 3: do with this pony. I know that Pony's given me
Speaker 3: Contreia secret red.
Speaker 2: Erica shout out to Vivia Vivica Fox hair stenter is
Speaker 2: a beautiful ponytail.
Speaker 3: I'm about to what do you remember what waves this is?
Speaker 3: I don't, but it's it doesn't natural hair. It kind
Speaker 3: of does. Yeah, it's as closest I was gonna get.
Speaker 3: It's proffin. I'm gonna go anyway. Uh yeah, So I
Speaker 3: don't know. I just feel like I want to be
Speaker 3: more conscious of it.
Speaker 2: I do think, though, that there are bad parents. I
Speaker 2: think that there are parents that you know, could be better.
Speaker 2: I think even me, I'm sure it could be better
Speaker 2: in certain ways.
Speaker 3: I'm not the perfect parent.
Speaker 2: That's why I started this podcast to begin with because
Speaker 2: of these conversations and like I do my self self
Speaker 2: realizations I've had in like the past thirty two episodes
Speaker 2: we've recorded, you know what I mean, things that I
Speaker 2: realized I could be better at. Things I can realize
Speaker 2: I can loosen up on, you know what I mean,
Speaker 2: that I overthink. And that's why I started this that
Speaker 2: we started this podcast because I because my perspective has
Speaker 2: changed on things. You know, I do feel more liberal
Speaker 2: about things, and I also and then I do feel
Speaker 2: more like educated about things and will make more informed
Speaker 2: choices for me and my child, you know, just having
Speaker 2: conversations with like Jessica about like talking about sex.
Speaker 3: And try and like you know, body parts. And there's
Speaker 3: so many conversations we.
Speaker 2: Have with like like with Jasmine and King, you know
Speaker 2: what I mean, These all these different situations, and this
Speaker 2: journey of podcasting is definitely and is teaching me and
Speaker 2: is changing my perspective or solidifying my perspective. And this
Speaker 2: is why we're here because maybe you'll have the opportunity
Speaker 2: to actually listen and understand where're coming from and change
Speaker 2: your perspective. And also even as if you're listening as
Speaker 2: a mom, change your own expectation of yourself, like not
Speaker 2: to say not to hold yourself to this high standard,
Speaker 2: but don't hold yourself to this very limited.
Speaker 3: Like square of only what it looks like to be
Speaker 3: a mom.
Speaker 2: Because as women as people were human life, there's there's
Speaker 2: such a there's such a huge spectrum of all the
Speaker 2: things being body as parents, and we all do it differently.
Speaker 2: And you know another thing like from women to women
Speaker 2: doing it like you said, hella dads rappers, gang rappers, why.
Speaker 3: Are you talking about my baby daddy? That was very
Speaker 3: FuG raps. You know, like we don't hear people criticizing
Speaker 3: fucking your baby daddy. Because I was on the store too.
Speaker 3: I saw her on baby daddy snapchat. She seemed like
Speaker 3: a good mom. Then oh all fifteen seconds of the snapitch,
Speaker 3: I seemed like a good mom. Oh yeah, she seemed
Speaker 3: like a good mom.
Speaker 2: But you know, typical, like they were going in on me,
Speaker 2: but nobody but brought me all types of names. I
Speaker 2: was like, what nobody says shit about him being a
Speaker 2: good or bad dad based on his lyrics?
Speaker 3: When she gets six, you're gonna be able to google
Speaker 3: it or his music videos.
Speaker 2: And I'm not trying to put him out there like
Speaker 2: that him. I'm just saying, in gender in general, men, yeah.
Speaker 3: Men don't don't have this high Like no one's like,
Speaker 3: oh you know what. I'm just saying, like.
Speaker 2: It's just not met and high to hell to a
Speaker 2: different standard and for her equal parents. I mean, obviously
Speaker 2: the mother is the mother, but it's everything. Women always
Speaker 2: carry the burden of everything. We're not allowed to have
Speaker 2: more sex because we're we haven't we take we take
Speaker 2: things internally, right right, We're not allowed to have fun
Speaker 2: because suddenly we're like these people that like we're just
Speaker 2: mothers and we have.
Speaker 3: Like three more three more, three people were house after five,
Speaker 3: you're done, not eligible for marriage? Like oh you guys?
Speaker 3: About how many people Nope? Cancel? Yeah like that.
Speaker 2: I like you.
Speaker 3: Yeah, so that's true. That's true. That's true.
Speaker 2: It was all women. I mean, this this site is
Speaker 2: mostly women. I feel like it would be with women
Speaker 2: and gay men.
Speaker 3: Yeah. Well I hope I hope that nobody has time
Speaker 3: for this ship. Clearly they have a lot of time.
Speaker 2: Site is popping for years, a lot of a lot
Speaker 2: of the talk about a lot of podcasts on this
Speaker 2: site specifically, and the site's been around for a really
Speaker 2: long time. I'm not saying the site because I'm sure
Speaker 2: when the money'll I'll figure it out anyway through.
Speaker 3: Black But like, I just don't want to.
Speaker 2: I don't want to encourage people to go look up
Speaker 2: not just our stuff, but just all the negativity that
Speaker 2: is on there. It's just really sad, Like it's just
Speaker 2: I mean, it's like any social media properm I guess,
Speaker 2: like Twitter, It's just this is like the one that
Speaker 2: is literally dedicated to like gossip. Instagram is like I
Speaker 2: was say, like seventy gossip.
Speaker 3: I would say, if you have enough time to go
Speaker 3: visit a site to read up about in in.
Speaker 2: Use your name, make comments, and read up about two
Speaker 2: perfectly strangers that are nice enough to tell you their
Speaker 2: hoary stories on the internet interweb, then you could probably
Speaker 2: invest your time doing something more productive.
Speaker 3: Why don't you start your own vanilla podcast? I can't
Speaker 3: kind of talk shit.
Speaker 2: Yeah okay, okay, I copy, We'll be sure to tune
Speaker 2: in and comment of it. I will leave that Apple
Speaker 2: podcast review. I was like, I wond I'm just gonna
Speaker 2: go and like try to like leave a bad review.
Speaker 2: We don't really have any only for bad thing anyone's
Speaker 2: ever said is that our kids are annoying and maybe
Speaker 2: they need something.
Speaker 3: Once. You know, it's not for everybody. We're not for
Speaker 3: everybody in that's cool, you know what I mean. I
Speaker 3: love the community that have I love the people that
Speaker 3: we talk to. I love that we have moms.
Speaker 2: I love that we have people who don't have kids yet,
Speaker 2: but like you know, feel like they can still relate
Speaker 2: to us because at the end of the day, we're
Speaker 2: just women and we're just people, and we're we have
Speaker 2: we're having these like real experiences, and you know, some
Speaker 2: people just don't feel comfortable sharing those type of things,
Speaker 2: you know, publicly said some by don't I don't share
Speaker 2: everything about my life.
Speaker 3: I'm just saying I don't some things I just can't.
Speaker 3: If you know how something we.
Speaker 2: I mean to let things play out first internally each
Speaker 2: so before I expose. But for the for for everybody else,
Speaker 2: I hope that a big ship. Honestly, being honest on
Speaker 2: the interweb has made me more open and honest with
Speaker 2: myself and honestly like liberated, like you know, this is
Speaker 2: this is my life, this is my all, this is
Speaker 2: my alt.
Speaker 3: Yeah, honestly, I forget what I say me too.
Speaker 2: We just upload these while we put the music on,
Speaker 2: and then I do a little editing, but I don't
Speaker 2: ever really listen to it. I just look for the
Speaker 2: breaks where I need to put like elevator music where
Speaker 2: like my child is chomping on chips, like right now, you.
Speaker 3: Can't You're not gonna be a little to buzz this
Speaker 3: out and oh baby.
Speaker 2: I'm all you could eat marsham on us. And I.
Speaker 3: Don't really listen.
Speaker 2: I just uploaded so like even the other day, like
Speaker 2: my friend called me and was like, yo, I just
Speaker 2: lied to you episode.
Speaker 3: He's like, you are like wild and I was like,
Speaker 3: what did I say? And he was talking about that's long, slim, long,
Speaker 3: thick episode we did.
Speaker 2: I got some damn And I was like, guys wanted
Speaker 2: to know what we were saying about their dongs? I know.
Speaker 2: He was like, I was like, did I say your name?
Speaker 2: He's like, I don't know where you talking about me.
Speaker 2: I was like I don't know, but I was like, yeah,
Speaker 2: I don't even remember what that. I had to go
Speaker 2: back and relisten and I was like, oh, yeah, that
Speaker 2: was funny, but anyway, yeah, okay, have you ever had
Speaker 2: other than this are fifteen minutes.
Speaker 3: The same have you ever had?
Speaker 2: So I want to be this is too Well, someone
Speaker 2: judge you based on your parenting outside of this, judge me, Yeah,
Speaker 2: like made a common.
Speaker 3: Yeah my own's family member. Yeah yeah, I'm just be
Speaker 3: talking all the time.
Speaker 2: But I feel like family members moms will do that
Speaker 2: because moms, you know, like they like, yeah, they like
Speaker 2: I mean, of course, and you know what I take
Speaker 2: into consideration.
Speaker 3: My mom's because she's a mom, that she has been
Speaker 3: a mom longer than me.
Speaker 2: And but if there's certain things that I'm just like, well,
Speaker 2: you know, I don't want to do it like that,
Speaker 2: you know, like I don't want to do it how
Speaker 2: you did it.
Speaker 3: I didn't like that, I mean, but then there's other
Speaker 3: things where I'm like, I should listen to this, you know.
Speaker 3: And it's also an approach. Everybody knows parenting is a
Speaker 3: very touchy subject. It's very personal.
Speaker 2: Tak it very personally, and if you really genuinely care
Speaker 2: about someone, you're going to be very I mean.
Speaker 3: Not that I expect I don't gonna just care about.
Speaker 2: Our feelings or whatever, but just like you're just like, hey, sis,
Speaker 2: you know, study show that if you say d I
Speaker 2: c K fifty times, right, they've repeated, even though I'm
Speaker 2: sure there's those studies.
Speaker 3: That she and iriate like that.
Speaker 2: Oh no, it's true. I mean, irin stop, either sit
Speaker 2: down or go in another room. I think that I
Speaker 2: actually recently had a situation.
Speaker 3: Well it was, it was, it was.
Speaker 2: It wasn't like she was so basically I was at
Speaker 2: a football game. Irie got mad at my mom for
Speaker 2: like I was at my.
Speaker 3: Brother's football game. I got mad at my mom for
Speaker 3: like taking something from her, and she like got in
Speaker 3: her face and was like hey, and I was like what. No.
Speaker 3: I was like you need to say I'm sorry. And
Speaker 3: she refused to say I'm sorry, like refused and was
Speaker 3: like a thing. And so I was pissed because I
Speaker 3: was like, no, you need to say you're sorry.
Speaker 2: And I think it's so she was crying, and she
Speaker 2: was crying and I was like this is so stupid.
Speaker 2: Like so then you know my grandma, I was, yeah,
Speaker 2: so my mom, my grandma. She can't handle when I
Speaker 2: research crent like the moment, like like what happened. She's
Speaker 2: like stressing out.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, my god, oh my god.
Speaker 2: And because she's like she's that like maternal person in
Speaker 2: her life. That's she just gives her whatever she wants
Speaker 2: at any time.
Speaker 3: You know what I mean.
Speaker 2: And so anyway, my mom's friend saw what was happening,
Speaker 2: and she was like, oh, Erica, stop being mean to her.
Speaker 2: Just let her have the let her have the cupcake.
Speaker 2: And I looked at her and I said, excuse me,
Speaker 2: I'm teaching my daughter a lesson. Please don't undermind my
Speaker 2: parenting seriously, and like it just like came out of me,
Speaker 2: like I said it in the most respectful way.
Speaker 3: But I was like, ah, don't fuck me, don't interrupt
Speaker 3: what I'm doing right here. Yeah, and then too, and
Speaker 3: then like she was like ooh and then.
Speaker 2: So like Iri finally chilled out. She apologized, and then
Speaker 2: I was like I was low key like fuming inside.
Speaker 3: I was like so annoyed, right, and it was your
Speaker 3: mom's friend. This is my mom's friend. And then so
Speaker 3: then I was like, okay, I need to be respectful.
Speaker 3: Did your mom saything? No, she's saying, I mean, you
Speaker 3: was really respectful.
Speaker 2: So I turned around to her and I said, look,
Speaker 2: I apologize, But I was like, I have a bunch
Speaker 2: of women around that don't let don't that. Do not
Speaker 2: let me discipline my child. And I'm the one that
Speaker 2: has to go home with her at the end of
Speaker 2: the night and deal with all of the all this
Speaker 2: mixed messaging. And she was like, it's cool you checked me,
Speaker 2: and I was like, no, I really didn't check you.
Speaker 2: But I this is this is my job and my experience,
Speaker 2: and I need to make sure that my daughter is
Speaker 2: my daughter is a respectful young woman one day and
Speaker 2: this is not okay, it's this is when it starts,
Speaker 2: you know what I mean. And so when she left,
Speaker 2: she got up at like twin ten minutes later, I
Speaker 2: was like, Mom, I was like, was I was that rude?
Speaker 3: Was I disrespectful?
Speaker 2: My mom was like, absolutely not. And I was actually
Speaker 2: surprised that she took my side because sometimes, you know,
Speaker 2: my mom don't agree on certain things, and even.
Speaker 3: She sometimes can look at me as a child, right,
Speaker 3: you know what I mean?
Speaker 2: Yeah, and you have to Yeah, I think within that
Speaker 2: moment she she really she like tered me as an
Speaker 2: adult a parent, and she was like, no, absolutely, I
Speaker 2: really needs to learn and that's not Lee's place. And
Speaker 2: then okay, yeah, I mean and I agree, and sometimes
Speaker 2: even yeah, and then sometimes because even with the like
Speaker 2: like you.
Speaker 3: Said, like, well grandparents, you know, there's this this spoiler
Speaker 3: spoil you come. I come home from a trip and
Speaker 3: she's been with them, and she's like acting all I'm like,
Speaker 3: ah no, no, no, no.
Speaker 2: No, no, let's reprogramm the brain because you don't get
Speaker 2: whatever you want whenever you cry, right, you know.
Speaker 3: No. That irritates the shit on me too, And I think,
Speaker 3: I mean, yeah, I think that was appropriate.
Speaker 2: But that's what I'm saying, like interfering with parenting, judging parenting.
Speaker 2: I think sometimes there's been place. There's been times though,
Speaker 2: when I've seen parents that I felt borderline abusive and
Speaker 2: I felt inclined to interfere like friends, no, not friends,
Speaker 2: but like in public, like oh yeah. And then even
Speaker 2: then you're like, yeah, can I over set up boundaries?
Speaker 2: So I've seen kids that I wanted to like pull this.
Speaker 2: I have before I've been like, yo, what what are
Speaker 2: you doing?
Speaker 3: Okay? Yeah? Really yeah, Well.
Speaker 7: There's there was one time this kid, this this woman
Speaker 7: was screaming at her kid in the parking line, just
Speaker 7: like he was like crying and walking away, and she
Speaker 7: just kept screaming, maybe like five me yesterday.
Speaker 3: Oh it's beautiful.
Speaker 2: Thank you.
Speaker 3: When when you asked the lady, are you okay? She
Speaker 3: was like mind mind, and I was like, oh damn,
Speaker 3: a five year old. Yeah, it was a bit.
Speaker 2: It was and I would never like, it has to
Speaker 2: be really bad for me to interfere with me. But
Speaker 2: I was low key when I left there. I felt
Speaker 2: sad for that kid. I was like, what does this
Speaker 2: kid deal with daily? And then I know, like iuse,
Speaker 2: I know, like some times all yell at irin, you
Speaker 2: know what I mean.
Speaker 3: I try not to. I try to really like just
Speaker 3: like enforce, you know. I try to like her to
Speaker 3: know what my like voices, you know, like no right,
Speaker 3: you know when I get like that, she knows I
Speaker 3: shouldn't have to.
Speaker 2: Just been very few times, I like, it's usually because
Speaker 2: I'm tired or I don't know. I think like the
Speaker 2: first time I ever went crazy.
Speaker 3: Was when she was like first starting school and she was.
Speaker 2: Just acting a crazy fool every time I would take
Speaker 2: her to school, crying hysterically.
Speaker 3: I know it is not getting in her car seat.
Speaker 3: Like remember once I were fighting, I was like fighting
Speaker 3: her in her car seat. She would not get into
Speaker 3: the car seat. Oh my goodness you me. Yeah, you
Speaker 3: wouldn't get in your car seat. Remember when you used
Speaker 3: to cry and went to school? Why'd you cry?
Speaker 2: Nice?
Speaker 3: Because what you say I wanted.
Speaker 2: I know, I always want you too, But you got
Speaker 2: to learn we all went to school, and your school's
Speaker 2: really cool.
Speaker 3: Still, mom, of course I did, did I know, hold
Speaker 3: on baby one second? But yeah, you know, but I
Speaker 3: but I do realize how personal it is. But even
Speaker 3: you yelling.
Speaker 2: Said, you know, saying something to a parent doesn't necessarily
Speaker 2: change anything.
Speaker 3: That's still that's the thing, Like.
Speaker 2: That's what I realized, Like, okay, me yelling at this
Speaker 2: woman about her kid, like maybe it'll help her like
Speaker 2: snap out of her like rage of anger. But ultimately,
Speaker 2: like that's what makes me maybe.
Speaker 3: Sad, is like she's gonna go home with this kid
Speaker 3: and who knows what, who knows what she does.
Speaker 2: But maybe she was just having a moment, you know,
Speaker 2: like who knows. You know, as parents, we have moments
Speaker 2: where that we're not proud of. You know, I've had
Speaker 2: moments where I've had sam sorry, yeah yeah, And I
Speaker 2: think that's where.
Speaker 3: Parents.
Speaker 2: A lot of parents have a problem apologizing to their children.
Speaker 2: You know, I know my moms. She's gotten better as
Speaker 2: I've gotten.
Speaker 3: Older, but she never would apologize when she would do
Speaker 3: what I felt was like to going too far, not
Speaker 3: going too far like physically anything, but just like she
Speaker 3: was wrong, you know what I mean, right, but that happened.
Speaker 3: I mean the human like just.
Speaker 2: Like having a roommate or a friend that she lived
Speaker 2: with twenty for seven forever and at no point you're
Speaker 2: gonna like be ignited and being in a feeling and
Speaker 2: then later say I apologize, Like that's human nature. Yeah,
Speaker 2: but our children are just so precious, but they're so smart,
Speaker 2: and they're so they just mean so much to us.
Speaker 2: As I'm sure mothers listening know that when someone tells
Speaker 2: you like you or like questions your love for them.
Speaker 2: As a parent, who parent, where we whether they're well being,
Speaker 2: or who they're going to be, Because that's all I
Speaker 2: think about as a parent is who I'm like shaving
Speaker 2: my child to be. I mean, of course I'm shaping.
Speaker 2: I'm like I'm putting out some sort of blueprint. But
Speaker 2: she's gonna, you know, follow whatever she wants to do.
Speaker 2: But I do know that what I do greatly influences that,
Speaker 2: and those are things I think about all the time.
Speaker 2: So for someone to like come out who doesn't know
Speaker 2: me and try to make me feel that way, I
Speaker 2: was like, damn, how many women experience this Like this
Speaker 2: isn't I'm so we're so early in our parenting journey
Speaker 2: like this is this is gonna happen so many more times? Yeah,
Speaker 2: you know, and like so how do I deal with
Speaker 2: this where it doesn't Oh, I don't let it enrage me.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, that's why I had to think about it,
Speaker 2: like I'm not taking this ship personally. Bitch, isn't be bored?
Speaker 2: I said, I'm not taking shit personally, bitch, just be bored.
Speaker 2: You know clearly you're bored. So I'm happy I'm in
Speaker 2: a place in my life in general where like there's
Speaker 2: not much that could really fuck with me.
Speaker 3: Do you feel that way? Yeah, Like it's not someone's
Speaker 3: opinion of me. I mean, of course sometimes shot of course,
Speaker 3: shit you think about it, but like from a stranger,
Speaker 3: like I'm no, not really. Yeah, it definitely annoyed me.
Speaker 3: It annoyed me, but like I said, like I expect it,
Speaker 3: and it's gonna just be more. It's gonna be just
Speaker 3: be more.
Speaker 2: And I like there was comments made about Luna, Like
Speaker 2: and first of all, if you're if you're so ignorant
Speaker 2: to talk about a child, you're not on my level
Speaker 2: to begin with. I just feel like also like throwing
Speaker 2: insults about your physical like about your body and like
Speaker 2: the way you look, it's just like what else?
Speaker 3: Who does that?
Speaker 2: Like like like it's like some high school really is
Speaker 2: it was like some h yeah, but you know what,
Speaker 2: I can't even remember like the last time I got
Speaker 2: in a fight and someone talked about my body, Like
Speaker 2: I just feel like, I mean, I know what happens.
Speaker 2: Body shaming is a real thing, but like like I
Speaker 2: don't know, it just seemed like so yeah.
Speaker 3: It's obviously juvenile. It's crazy, and first of all, like
Speaker 3: I do, yeah, I do. That's sad.
Speaker 2: Well you're just a child hereby it probably is a
Speaker 2: kid really like someone young and stupid.
Speaker 3: I don't even physically it's not I know, a look
Speaker 3: good Like I'm.
Speaker 2: Not like none of that really like bothers me shit
Speaker 2: like that because I already went to high school, Like
Speaker 2: I already did.
Speaker 3: I've been there, done that.
Speaker 2: Like there's a place in your life and you're like,
Speaker 2: first of all, there's nothing you can't tell me about.
Speaker 3: Me that I obviously I'm not aware of. I have
Speaker 3: this body my whole life, so I'm just like not
Speaker 3: placed by it at all. But yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 3: Bullying is a real thing. Bullying bullying adults is a
Speaker 3: real thing, like Haschal lives on.
Speaker 2: This is when I say now that I think about
Speaker 2: when I think about bullying adults, I think about Kanye
Speaker 2: being honest and now being like.
Speaker 3: They were trying to bully me backstage. They trying to
Speaker 3: wear this hat, bullying me. They trying to get me
Speaker 3: not to wear my hat. They're bullying.
Speaker 2: It was it was my.
Speaker 3: Anyway, that was a travesty. Sorry about that.
Speaker 2: I don't know if you know, but I have an
Speaker 2: extreme fear, like like extreme fear of bugs. And I
Speaker 2: thought I thought of Jamilla thought something landed on her shoulder.
Speaker 2: I thought I saw it.
Speaker 3: I bumped my daughter's head on the table.
Speaker 2: As I'm talking about like being trying to be I
Speaker 2: am like we talk, was gonna have a lump on
Speaker 2: her head because.
Speaker 3: I'm afraid of bugs. To self for bugs here, not
Speaker 3: to self serve and protect your child anyway, What are
Speaker 3: you saying, Kanye West? Is that Oh Kanye saying that
Speaker 3: was bullying him. Oh yeah, I was saying it.
Speaker 2: That me, Like that's how I feel when I say,
Speaker 2: like I'm being bullied as an adult, but like an asshole.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but it's a real thing. I mean it's so
Speaker 3: it's so minute right now, but like I'm colding me.
Speaker 2: Kiss it, kiss it.
Speaker 3: Did we talk about Kanye meeting with Trump? No, that's
Speaker 3: just so he's so over for me. I'm done with him.
Speaker 2: I don't care what people try to spend his his
Speaker 2: cause as down a minute, We're almost got down, promise.
Speaker 3: He's pretty terrible. Someone said he was a freedom writer,
Speaker 3: that he's like what is he like a genius? He's
Speaker 3: getting good with the Trump and that he's gonna change
Speaker 3: the world.
Speaker 2: Is that what people?
Speaker 3: Is? That what people think the girl? They think he's
Speaker 3: that that intelligent, that way his own plot and scheme
Speaker 3: to get in. That's what I was thinking. I was like,
Speaker 3: whonder people think that?
Speaker 2: Like they think that he's actually scheming and plotting and
Speaker 2: this isn't all like a narcissists like playground, like he's.
Speaker 3: Like infiltrating on the Yeah.
Speaker 6: No, he's just.
Speaker 3: No for himself for theeasy government. In his own brainy
Speaker 3: I kind of feel bad for Kim. I feel bad too.
Speaker 3: You know that she's probably a little bit miserable. She
Speaker 3: has to deal with that crazy.
Speaker 2: Every day talk to have him talk about crazy Now,
Speaker 2: how amazing he is all the time.
Speaker 8: Don't Like, I'm not doubting his genius. I'm not doubting
Speaker 8: his innovative ideas. I'm not doubting that he can create musings.
Speaker 8: But there's there's something, there's that other side of him
Speaker 8: at Gemini that just can't help but kind.
Speaker 2: Of sabotage all that for himself, Like his it gets
Speaker 2: in the way all of that greatness.
Speaker 3: He gets in the way of it by just opening
Speaker 3: his mouth.
Speaker 2: I just can't get with the Like, if you can't
Speaker 2: intelligently communicate these very top secret ideas that everyone keeps
Speaker 2: suggesting he has, then.
Speaker 3: I can't take him seriously. Have you seen that three
Speaker 3: D thing? Have you ever watched any of his stories? Yeah,
Speaker 3: like the hologram that's just crazy? Is that real? I
Speaker 3: think so?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 3: I think so too. I Mean they're not maybe not
Speaker 3: necessarily his ideas, but he's in some way part of it.
Speaker 3: And like that's what I'm saying, Like he has just
Speaker 3: a new phone. Is it a new phone? The new iPhone?
Speaker 3: Is it? I said to her, Oh, maybe not if
Speaker 3: he's out. No, let me loosen it a little bit.
Speaker 3: I don't know, dude. No, I'm not gonna take it off.
Speaker 3: I'm just gonna losten it because it's I don't want
Speaker 3: your hair to be this tight when you go to sleep.
Speaker 3: I don't know, like him talking about.
Speaker 2: Him being in the Kardashian family, there's a lot of
Speaker 2: there's not a lot of male energy, so he could
Speaker 2: relate to Donald Trump's campaign more than Hillary's. Clinton's I'm coming. No,
Speaker 2: I just feel bad for him. But I feel bad
Speaker 2: for him yet I know she's she's probably like he's
Speaker 2: bad ship.
Speaker 3: I'm telling your knew what she was.
Speaker 2: I mean, she didn't care what she was getting herself into.
Speaker 2: She she loved him, sure she sure that probably still does.
Speaker 2: But also it was all about he was the coolest
Speaker 2: rapper at the time, you know, and that was what
Speaker 2: it was him for him too. She's the finest girl, right,
Speaker 2: And that's what happens when you are both narcissists and
Speaker 2: you marry each other, you know what I mean, Something's
Speaker 2: bound to go wrong.
Speaker 3: And one of y'all gonna be crazier than the other.
Speaker 3: And obviously we know who that is, poor baby or
Speaker 3: Boo boo. But I don't know how I got it. Oh,
Speaker 3: I was just I don't know how I got it, Kanye,
Speaker 3: But I guess I was talking about bullying. Yes, baby,
Speaker 3: should we do our advice? Oh?
Speaker 2: Yeah. So we got a message from one of our listeners, Anonymous,
Speaker 2: and actually it was a good one.
Speaker 3: I think it's one that needs to be talked about.
Speaker 3: What is it, ladies, Anonymous?
Speaker 2: Please, this is a long This is a long story,
Speaker 2: but backstory is important, I think before you can answer
Speaker 2: or give advice. In two thousand and nine, I met
Speaker 2: a guy at work. I was an admin at the
Speaker 2: hospital and he was sort of a custodian. Immediately, I
Speaker 2: was not attracted to him on a dating level, but
Speaker 2: he was always pleasant, et cetera.
Speaker 3: Eventually we exchange numbers.
Speaker 2: I learned that he had multiple kids and multiple women,
Speaker 2: and it was kind of a turn with multiple women
Speaker 2: and it was kind of a turnoff. However, we remained
Speaker 2: friends and kept chatting. After about nine months, we started
Speaker 2: to chill and flirt, and that led us to sleeping together.
Speaker 2: He was in your average low life with a low paying,
Speaker 2: debt end job and multiple baby mothers. He began school
Speaker 2: when we met, and I encourage and also helped with
Speaker 2: late night homework, etc.
Speaker 3: He was also a.
Speaker 2: Phenomenal father to all of his kids, and there was
Speaker 2: zero baby mama drama. So between those things his charm
Speaker 2: and consistency in life. So between those things, his charm
Speaker 2: and consistency in life, we began a relationship.
Speaker 3: We moved in together after a few months, and not
Speaker 3: even a year had gone by before one of his
Speaker 3: sons moved in with us. We lived decent as a
Speaker 3: blended family. He finished school, he came home daily at
Speaker 3: a decent hour from work. We cooked together, discussed marriage
Speaker 3: at one point. His career after school began to take off.
Speaker 2: After five years of cohabitating, the relationship began to feel
Speaker 2: tense and rocky.
Speaker 3: There was never any suspicion in the.
Speaker 2: Cheating, however, you could tell we're both visibly and happy
Speaker 2: and merely settling for our current relationship. With the state
Speaker 2: of it, however, ung in there without doing anything to
Speaker 2: really rectify or even acknowledge that there was an issue
Speaker 2: with the relationship.
Speaker 3: But you could just feel in the air.
Speaker 2: Our sessions became fewer and far between, meaning sex sex,
Speaker 2: but still often enough that no one got the itch
Speaker 2: for outside sex. The last year of the relationship, we
Speaker 2: discussed moving into separate places. While he suggested this, I
Speaker 2: felt like it was a step backwards in the relationship,
Speaker 2: and he said, why move and still stay together? We
Speaker 2: should slip. At first, it was tough. We've gotten a
Speaker 2: lot of arguments over petty stuff. He even told me
Speaker 2: at one point go get tested, which, because I had
Speaker 2: never suspected any I mean none cheating, I felt he
Speaker 2: was being an asshole and was fewy mean words to
Speaker 2: hurt me anyway. After lots of back and forth, and
Speaker 2: despite my reluctancy, we remained friends and spent together and
Speaker 2: spent time together as a family with the kids, but
Speaker 2: as friends. We had a total of three sexual encounters
Speaker 2: after the fact, all which he led, all which he
Speaker 2: led me to believe that he was so desperate that
Speaker 2: he wasn't with anyone else. I hadn't been with anyone
Speaker 2: anyone but him the whole time, so, needless to say,
Speaker 2: we didn't use protection. Months later, at my GYN visit,
Speaker 2: I was made aware that I had chlamydia, which it
Speaker 2: had been at least six months since we had slept together,
Speaker 2: and truthfully, I couldn't tell you at which point I
Speaker 2: contracted it from him before or after the move.
Speaker 3: It would mean he either cheated on me or still
Speaker 3: put me.
Speaker 2: At Han's risk by knowingly sleeping with me raw after
Speaker 2: being with some other girl raw. Either way, I was
Speaker 2: crushed and cried, and I got the news nonetheless, Nonetheless,
Speaker 2: I got treated. I called him immediately, which at this
Speaker 2: point our communication had been tapering off a lot. I
Speaker 2: let him know the deal, and he swore he had
Speaker 2: just been to the doctors and was good, which made
Speaker 2: me wonder if when he told me months back to
Speaker 2: go get tested he was telling me something then, which
Speaker 2: would mean he had this while we were still living together. Anyway,
Speaker 2: I cursed him out, told him to get the girl
Speaker 2: tested and stay out of my life.
Speaker 3: Four months later, I miss him. I'm not mad anymore.
Speaker 2: I thought no communication at all, he would at least
Speaker 2: call to apologize, make an effort, but he hasn't.
Speaker 3: I know.
Speaker 2: I'm silly for even wanting to reach out, send an email,
Speaker 2: et cetera. But this is someone I spent practically a
Speaker 2: decade with while I have been on tender and met
Speaker 2: random sorry pause for fish already need sext me feel well.
Speaker 2: I have been on Tinder and met randoms, none of
Speaker 2: them the quality, d family, orientation, et cetera. Things that
Speaker 2: I loved about him. I also I also realized part
Speaker 2: of the disinterest may have been me weight gain, my
Speaker 2: career remained at a standstill while his grew no longer
Speaker 2: trying to be cute or sexy. I realized these things
Speaker 2: now after the fact, and when I brought them to
Speaker 2: him months before the results were uncovered, he would swear
Speaker 2: that wasn't it. He just wanted to focus on him
Speaker 2: and his growth, and that they were no longer and
Speaker 2: that we were no longer.
Speaker 3: Growing as a couple. Any advice for me? I know
Speaker 3: this is dumb, stupid, long, but I really need your
Speaker 3: advice because that was long. Girl.
Speaker 2: Oh y'all still tune in. Basically, she was with a
Speaker 2: guy she wasn't even interested in. They you know, they
Speaker 2: ended up getting together, cohabitating with their kids or his kid,
Speaker 2: and naturally their relationships started to kind of dissipate, and
Speaker 2: eventually he suggested.
Speaker 3: That they move out.
Speaker 2: She didn't really want to break up, but they did anyway,
Speaker 2: And in spite of their breakup, he had said that
Speaker 2: she should get tested.
Speaker 3: She thought he was just being rude.
Speaker 2: Find out later, like six months later, after they've had
Speaker 2: sex a few times randomly, that she has an STD.
Speaker 2: Now she was angry, months have gone by, she's not
Speaker 2: angry anymore, and now she misses him, and it's wondering
Speaker 2: if it's her fault essentially in some way, or if
Speaker 2: she's crazy for wanting to get back together with him.
Speaker 3: And that's basically what this is in the summary. I
Speaker 3: told her first of all, she wasn't even interested to
Speaker 3: begin with. It kind of like grew on her.
Speaker 2: And it got comfortable. Comfortable love isn't the love to chase.
Speaker 2: It's very easy to get comfortable with people because they're there,
Speaker 2: because it's easy, because it's it's routine. And if he
Speaker 2: suggested that they move separately, he wasn't really focused on
Speaker 2: growing the relationship to begin with.
Speaker 3: He obviously was out of sex. That's someone outside of it,
Speaker 3: which means it doesn't respect her. He certainly didn't respect
Speaker 3: her health enough to give her to protect her.
Speaker 2: And and your female intuition is telling you that he
Speaker 2: said that get tested stuff early on, then you're probably right.
Speaker 3: Honestly, that just.
Speaker 2: Seems a bit random, especially when there's no suspicion at all,
Speaker 2: Like what the fuck?
Speaker 3: Yeah he knew and I get okay, I hate a woman?
Speaker 3: Why didn't we do this?
Speaker 2: Like?
Speaker 3: Oh, was it me? What could I have done? I
Speaker 3: could have been dressing sexier? I should.
Speaker 2: All these things are dun all about stuff reflecting and
Speaker 2: taking accountability because there's always two parts in a relationship.
Speaker 2: But even in that I told her, there's a way
Speaker 2: to communicate to your partner. There's a way to make
Speaker 2: you feel sexy. There's there's like when there's someone who's
Speaker 2: really invested in the relationship winning and I know after
Speaker 2: time sometimes this shit is more difficult. But if you're
Speaker 2: really conscious about an adamant about, like wanting your partner
Speaker 2: to be your partner, you're gonna be like, that's go
Speaker 2: to the gym together, bag, Why don't you start playing
Speaker 2: for these jobs?
Speaker 3: To look at these things as friends?
Speaker 2: We do that So if you're not he wasn't committed
Speaker 2: to a relationship, the SCD was definitely the killed and
Speaker 2: the fact that he hasn't called him four months since
Speaker 2: that's happened.
Speaker 3: Is even more really like obvious that that's that he
Speaker 3: did that it was him.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he's a shame to call you. He's not a
Speaker 2: calling to a power dies because he he's like, damn,
Speaker 2: she hasn't called. Oh I'm off Scott Free. We don't
Speaker 2: got to talk about it. No, men don't want to
Speaker 2: talk about nothing. They'd rather did not talk about it
Speaker 2: and never talk to you again. We're just gonna have
Speaker 2: to acknowledge it and be like, yeah, maybe it was me, right,
Speaker 2: I mean, not that I want to be with any Yeah.
Speaker 2: Do you think if you had a guy give you
Speaker 2: an STD, could.
Speaker 3: You like get back together with him?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 3: Mom? You you.
Speaker 2: Oh with it?
Speaker 3: I mean, hey, we all have been in situations they're like,
Speaker 3: I would never do that. I was late? Is that
Speaker 3: so I will never go back to him?
Speaker 2: And you do?
Speaker 4: That?
Speaker 3: Bends to dumbership, honestly, And I'm not judging anybody, but
Speaker 3: do we deserve that? Fuck now?
Speaker 2: But I think that's the problem even in this case,
Speaker 2: is that we don't realize that we deserve better. And
Speaker 2: the moral of the stood is they're just dishonesty. There's
Speaker 2: no respect for ship your life because it's eventually like
Speaker 2: when you're fucking multiple people are all you're does what
Speaker 2: you're risky and you know who knows what You're fucking
Speaker 2: whole ass just transmitting and if you like give a
Speaker 2: fuck about somebody, at the very least, she'll throw in
Speaker 2: a rubber.
Speaker 3: I think it's super selfish.
Speaker 2: And I think you feeling that way out of comfort
Speaker 2: and wanting companion, you know, cuffing seasons coming is probably
Speaker 2: getting cold, and you just thinking you're thinking crazy, girl,
Speaker 2: You're thinking crazy.
Speaker 3: So I feel you. I feel you in the cuff
Speaker 3: and season. Just get some hot tea and some blankets.
Speaker 3: It'll be fine Netflix and show alone. Yeah, definitely, he's
Speaker 3: not worth your time and I am. And she says
Speaker 3: we spent a decade together and fuck that too. Oh
Speaker 3: and he also was one of the first people she
Speaker 3: has a She has like a crippling like insecurity about
Speaker 3: her feet.
Speaker 2: We've talked about her on another episode, and she has
Speaker 2: a crippling insecurity about her feet where she like wears socks,
Speaker 2: like doesn't ever let guys see her feet. And this
Speaker 2: person never ever stands even if a she or socks
Speaker 2: like she wouldn't, so he has seen he's seen all
Speaker 2: of her, seen her feet, and she feels buld. Yeah,
Speaker 2: and he touched and so I get that that he has.
Speaker 3: She feels like she can be totally vulnerable. But I
Speaker 3: guess that, babe, you can be that with someone else.
Speaker 3: If you can do that with him, you can do
Speaker 3: it again. You really can't. I know you might not
Speaker 3: want to do it again, but just because of that
Speaker 3: is not a reason.
Speaker 2: I know.
Speaker 3: It's not just that.
Speaker 2: I know that there's it's deeper than that, but that
Speaker 2: shouldn't even play a factor in this decision. Like this
Speaker 2: dude told you he wanted to move out basically so
Speaker 2: you can go be with other women, whether or not
Speaker 2: you want.
Speaker 3: To admit that or not.
Speaker 2: If that's basically what's happening here, then told you to
Speaker 2: get it tested because low ki, he probably knew something
Speaker 2: was fishy with him. Then you got you got what
Speaker 2: was it called the smack clap this smack I even
Speaker 2: wanting to use that term forever.
Speaker 3: I was like, I know I can't.
Speaker 2: You're glad, yes, And and hasn't called you, So that
Speaker 2: tells you right there, like if he hasn't called you,
Speaker 2: like he's trying to shame you. Too, and so making
Speaker 2: you feel crazy like you suddenly came up with this
Speaker 2: out of nowhere, you magically gained.
Speaker 3: Yourself an STD. Right. No, I've only been with you,
Speaker 3: you know, so somebody else. There's better guys out there,
Speaker 3: there are, they do exist, and they're beautiful. I've seen you.
Speaker 2: I felt your energy, like you you can do you can,
Speaker 2: you can and you will do better. You can will
Speaker 2: do better.
Speaker 3: But first you gotta like remember that ship.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and and like you brought up your weight and
Speaker 2: and like your career being at a standstill and all
Speaker 2: these things that you know could have possibly been that
Speaker 2: you're taking accountability for. But even I said, I told
Speaker 2: you what I emailed you, Like, if that's how you
Speaker 2: feel about you, Like, if you're not feeling sexy for yourself,
Speaker 2: you're not feeling like you're in the best shape, then
Speaker 2: take this time and focus.
Speaker 3: On you don't really feel good, you know, like so
Speaker 3: and take this into your next relationship. Maybe you could
Speaker 3: be like, you know, more conscious of you know, like stay,
Speaker 3: I'm all about keeping shit sexy.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but as one when we always want to put
Speaker 2: the blame on ourselves when it comes to that, I
Speaker 2: used to I did that like I felt like after
Speaker 2: I had like irie, like I.
Speaker 3: Just need it to be more sexy.
Speaker 2: That's why I bleach my hair blonde, because I was
Speaker 2: trying to be like this other vert like this new
Speaker 2: I'm fun mom, I'm still sexy, Like I still got it.
Speaker 3: I could change it up and be like wild, you
Speaker 3: know what I mean. And it's not.
Speaker 2: It's it's not your fault. It's not your fault. If
Speaker 2: you gained weight, it's not your fault. Maybe it's your
Speaker 2: fault with your career is at a sandstill. But guess what,
Speaker 2: Like that's what relationships. Your relationship is going.
Speaker 3: To go through that and push it.
Speaker 2: You can't And if they can't see that, and if
Speaker 2: you can't be if you're going to use that and
Speaker 2: as a as a reason to justify like the endings of.
Speaker 3: Your relationship, then you don't need to be in a relationship.
Speaker 3: And I mean not yet. You got some work to do,
Speaker 3: and you discussed in the beginning he was the custodian.
Speaker 3: Did you put you read that? Yeah, at the place
Speaker 3: you worked, so obviously you were more than willing to
Speaker 3: stick with him and be.
Speaker 2: There when he needed help studying and all these late
Speaker 2: night things and you know he was, and he was,
Speaker 2: you know, bettering himself, and shit, give yourself some credit.
Speaker 3: A lot of pictures wouldn't do that, a lot.
Speaker 2: Of which wouldn't have been interested when to say he
Speaker 2: has multiple baby mamas there, you know you you had your.
Speaker 3: Own reservations and you stuck through him with that. You
Speaker 3: saw him get better in bro, you helped aid that.
Speaker 2: And the fact that he hasn't I mean, even if
Speaker 2: if that's the case, hasn't aided you in the same
Speaker 2: way and push you, then fuck him because a good
Speaker 2: person is going to be like, you know, hey, babe,
Speaker 2: how are we gonna make this better for us?
Speaker 3: What do you think we could do better next time?
Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying, Like, I just and I
Speaker 2: only say that because I'm now for the first time
Speaker 2: in like a situationship with somebody who is like that,
Speaker 2: and it's different, you know, and I like it. You
Speaker 2: know that someone is I'm so once to wants to
Speaker 2: push me to be the better version of myself that.
Speaker 3: Sometimes we forget it's true. It's true anyway.
Speaker 2: I uh, I'm wishing you luck, girlfriend, and I hope
Speaker 2: that you have not emailed him.
Speaker 3: Delete the emails. Don't pick up the phone, don't do it,
Speaker 3: but uh anything else.
Speaker 2: No, we are working on merch and we're gonna have
Speaker 2: that merch up on the site soonersh Jia is looking at.
Speaker 3: Me like we are don't say date, don't launch date,
Speaker 3: no very soon, And so our merch is gonna be
Speaker 3: so cute, guys would be so cute. And not that normal,
Speaker 3: not that normal merch, not that normal podcast merger. Nobody
Speaker 3: wants to wear pod podcast on it. No one wants
Speaker 3: to wear a shirt that says podcast. No, absolutely not.
Speaker 2: I don't.
Speaker 3: I don't, even if you're my bestest friend. I mean no,
Speaker 3: we just do something now. Yeah, it's actually cute.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and make sure you follow Mela at Mila's Mobile spa.
Speaker 2: If you guys need any lash extensions in the LA.
Speaker 3: Area or.
Speaker 2: Microblading or facials all your spandates, she travels to you
Speaker 2: in the comfort of your own go onto her Instagram
Speaker 2: because you'll see.
Speaker 3: All of her transformations.
Speaker 2: One second, she's gonna do my lashes for mar d Day,
Speaker 2: so I'll be her next model.
Speaker 3: And yeah, that's it. We'll catch you next week. Make
Speaker 3: sure to follow us on at Good Mom's Underscore Bad
Speaker 3: choices if you have any, like you said, course stories,
Speaker 3: you can d m us, or you can email us,
Speaker 3: or you can actually can go our web.
Speaker 2: That's not only where we get all our message. Oh yeah,
Speaker 2: we gotta go to our website, Good Bumps, Bad Choices
Speaker 2: dot com. And then you can just write on our
Speaker 2: contact sheet or you can d m us whatever's easier,
Speaker 2: like just reach out, send a pigeon, send us some
Speaker 2: pictures or something.
Speaker 3: You know, keep it fun, keep it fun, Send we
Speaker 3: love news. Oh no, oh no, we're so bad our
Speaker 3: same boo. Anyway, we just show our boobs. Okay, I
Speaker 3: guess that's good night, night by bye, follows dude began,
Speaker 3: that's the way it is.
Speaker 2: Playing say play fun play.
Speaker 3: He didn't think shot it ou