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Speaker 1: It's the radio segment that just challenged Adam Sandler to

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Speaker 1: a weird mouth noises contest. Yeah, whoever wins, the entire

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Speaker 1: audience loses. Oh, audience participation not encouraged.

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Speaker 2: But get your tickets now with stories.

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Speaker 1: The secondary weird news stories around the globe, just like

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Speaker 1: everyone else does, except we've got a laser. Those other

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Speaker 1: mouth weirdos just don't This first laser stories out of Canada.

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Speaker 1: Thirty four year old Nick Faturo's just spent the last

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Speaker 1: year living and surfing in Costa Rica.

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Speaker 3: Oh damn so jealous.

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Speaker 1: And when he got home to Toronto, he opened his

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Speaker 1: mail to find a shocking letter from the government saying

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Speaker 1: he was dead.

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Speaker 3: I didn't know. That's how you found out. Yeah, screw

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Speaker 3: the light at the end of the tunnel. You actually

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Speaker 3: get it.

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Speaker 1: You have to open an envelope to let you know.

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Speaker 1: It was a long one too. The fourteen page letter

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Speaker 1: from the Ministry of Justice was hoping to collect money

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Speaker 1: from his estate for an outstanding speeding ticket that he

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Speaker 1: never paid. Well, that was somebody's got.

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Speaker 3: To And how does a thirty four year old who

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Speaker 3: just spent a year surfing in Costa Rica have an estate.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, he does remember contesting it back in twenty twenty two,

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Speaker 1: but totally forgot about it during his extended vacation.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, as one would.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. More than anything, Nick is just very grateful his

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Speaker 1: mother never saw the letter. Who was collecting his mail

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Speaker 1: at the time. Mom, He said, that would have been

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Speaker 1: a major shocker for her. Oh regardless. He's tried to

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Speaker 1: call the government to let them know that he is

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Speaker 1: very much alive, but can't get anybody on the phone.

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Speaker 3: Okay, maybe he needs to write a letter back.

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Speaker 1: Thankfully, they did respond to the news station covering the

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Speaker 1: story and said while they are happy to find out

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Speaker 1: Nick is alive, it doesn't erase the one thousand and

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Speaker 1: ninety two dollars that he owes them for the old

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Speaker 1: speeding ticket. Oh whoops, looking at that. He's dead again.

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Speaker 2: Country.

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Speaker 1: This next laser story is out of Ohio. A thirty

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Speaker 1: seven year old dad named Adam Sizemoors facing charges after

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Speaker 1: he kept calling his son's school to complain that they

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Speaker 1: were giving the kid too much homework. Oh yeah, he did.

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Speaker 1: He called the elementary school multiple times in just two

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Speaker 1: days to say his son had so much homework that

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Speaker 1: they didn't have any time to hang out with each other.

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Speaker 2: That's kind of sad.

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Speaker 1: It's kind of sweet though that. Yeah, he really wants

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Speaker 1: quality time with his sons and he wants to play

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Speaker 1: video games.

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Speaker 3: Amount of time you called the school and complained you

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Speaker 3: could have just gotten the homework done.

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Speaker 1: And also when he told school officials this news, he

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Speaker 1: was verbally abusive to the staff and used vulgar language.

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Speaker 3: I just want to bleep and hang out with my

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Speaker 3: bleeping kid.

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Speaker 2: They say.

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Speaker 1: He threatened the principal at one point and told him

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Speaker 1: he better quote put his big boy pants on because

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Speaker 1: he might be coming down there.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, threaten people. He gets the job done.

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Speaker 1: The school eventually stopped picking up his calls. Okay, so

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Speaker 1: Adam called his local police department instead.

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Speaker 2: I hope the police arrested Adam.

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Speaker 3: Sounds like that may have been the case.

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Speaker 1: And he didn't just call once, but eighteen times. He

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Speaker 1: kept asking to talk to the chief of police and

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Speaker 1: said things like, I.

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Speaker 2: Pay your salary.

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Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, he cares about his kids.

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Speaker 2: Is that what it is? Yes.

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Speaker 1: Eventually he spoke with the chief's assistant, who told him

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Speaker 1: that he could come down to the station and talk

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Speaker 1: to the chief of police. In person. Yeah, Well, Adam

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Speaker 1: wasn't okay with that. He demanded the chief of police

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Speaker 1: come to his.

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Speaker 3: House and Baby gave him options I pay the gas

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Speaker 3: in those cars.

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Speaker 1: That didn't happen. Yeah, but several officers did show up

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Speaker 1: at his house to arrest him.

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Speaker 3: That's a homework lesson for the kid Consolation prize.

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Speaker 1: He was charged with menacing and telecommunications harassment, both misdemeanors.

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Speaker 1: So it begs the question is this guy total psycho

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Speaker 1: or best dad ever? Yeah?

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Speaker 2: I want my parents to fight for me to knock.

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Speaker 3: Yes, my dad went to jail for my a in math.

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Speaker 3: That's right.

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Speaker 1: Let's go to your next laser story out of London.

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Speaker 1: Those who are lactose intolerant should probably avoid trips to

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Speaker 1: Europe in the foreseeable future. And I say that because

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Speaker 1: we've all heard of sushi conveyor about restaurants.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I still want to my god, are you telling

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Speaker 3: me they're gonna combine it?

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Speaker 1: Well, in Britain they're doing the same thing, but with cheese.

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Speaker 3: Yes, Could I just put my mouth at the into

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Speaker 3: the conveyor belt and have everything go in?

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Speaker 1: The innovative restaurant is called pick and Cheese and Their

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Speaker 1: conveyor belt is almost one hundred and fifty feet long,

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Speaker 1: delivering an array of cheese plates all around the restaurant,

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Speaker 1: paired with complimentary condiments and snacks.

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Speaker 2: So you have like the crackers waiting.

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Speaker 1: I'm showing them the pictures too. It looks like really

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Speaker 1: fancy dishes.

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Speaker 3: They're all under glass, which you know, very different than

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Speaker 3: the sushi place I go to.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly.

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Speaker 1: And if that isn't enough, patrons can also enjoy a

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Speaker 1: selection of charcouteries that are circling around the room.

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Speaker 2: Like some honeycomb.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, give me some pershudo. You know.

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Speaker 1: Maybe the best part for cheese lovers is that Pick

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Speaker 1: and Cheese offers a bottomless plates experience every Wednesday for

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Speaker 1: less than thirty dollars per person.

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Speaker 3: I'm hopping on the cheese tray and jaff and I'm

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Speaker 3: not getting off.

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Speaker 1: During this hour and fifteen minute session, guests can enjoy

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Speaker 1: as many plates of cheese off of the belt as

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Speaker 1: they so desire.

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Speaker 3: This is so good to backfire on them.

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Speaker 1: Reservations are highly recommended in order to secure a spot

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Speaker 1: for this cheese filled feast. Wow, and then probably make

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Speaker 1: a reservation with your doctor.

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Speaker 3: My god, can we put the wine on the conveyor

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Speaker 3: belt too?

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Speaker 2: Desert?

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Speaker 3: God?

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Speaker 1: How lazy are we? Patant just have a wine hose

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Speaker 1: next to it?

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Speaker 3: I guess just suck up.

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Speaker 2: This next lazer stories.

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Speaker 1: Out of the interwebs. Are you one of those responsible

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Speaker 1: adults who gets back to zero unread emails each day?

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Speaker 1: Or is your inbox full of them? I'm a hybrid,

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Speaker 1: so I keep it out A thousand oh' that's responsible.

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Speaker 3: I bet I have over thirty thousand oh my.

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Speaker 1: Well, A new study found letting it stay cluttered like

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Speaker 1: that might be affecting you and your mental health more

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Speaker 1: than you realize.

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Speaker 3: I get rid of them. I'm like subscribed to eighty

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Speaker 3: different things just because I want ten percent said.

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Speaker 2: Off, Yeah, unsubscribing is the hardest part Brook.

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Speaker 1: They found that a cluttered inbox can leave you feeling

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Speaker 1: flustered and disorganized all the time, and it could even

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Speaker 1: be costing you hundreds of dollars a year in things

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Speaker 1: like unnecessary late fees if you miss a bill that's

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Speaker 1: stuck in there Somewhere. That said, fifty two percent of

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Speaker 1: people with cluttered inboxes claim they like the way they

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Speaker 1: do things and they aren't going to delete Jack.

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Speaker 3: Oh, I hate email. I am so over it. If

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Speaker 3: you need something from me text, I think everything should

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Speaker 3: be on text.

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Speaker 1: Or find me in person. Oh wild, Yeah, come come

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Speaker 1: to where I work and tell me face to face

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Speaker 1: if it's really that important.

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Speaker 3: Just the electrical company, like, excuse me, Jeffer.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that's why this guy doesn't even have an email anymore.

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Speaker 1: If you want to reach him, he's kind of like Batman.

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Speaker 1: He's got to throw a spotlight up into the sky

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Speaker 1: with a Nike high top in there.

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Speaker 3: That'd be so sweet, and he's.

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Speaker 1: Going to be there before you know it. And that's

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Speaker 1: how means Laser Stories has come to an end for

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Speaker 1: the day. We'll do it again at the same

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Speaker 2: Time on Monday, brooking Jeffrey in the morning and