WEBVTT - "Does It Ever Get Easier?" - Part 1 0:00:00.480 --> 0:00:04.439 I won't let my body out me out wait everything 0:00:04.480 --> 0:00:07.960 that I'm made, don't won't spend my life trying to change. 0:00:08.680 --> 0:00:12.479 I'm learning love who I am, I get I'm strong, 0:00:12.880 --> 0:00:17.840 I feel free, I know everybody of me is beautiful 0:00:19.480 --> 0:00:24.479 and that will always out way if you feel it. 0:00:24.520 --> 0:00:29.000 But she'll some love to the food. Get there, say 0:00:29.200 --> 0:00:34.800 go one day, Anita, did you and die out way? 0:00:35.200 --> 0:00:36.360 Happy Saturday out way. 0:00:36.520 --> 0:00:39.240 I'm Leanne Ellington, and we are here to talk about 0:00:39.240 --> 0:00:41.920 one of the questions that I hear all the time 0:00:42.360 --> 0:00:45.440 from women that are stuck inside the food and body prison, 0:00:45.600 --> 0:00:49.960 which is does it get easier? And that really is 0:00:50.040 --> 0:00:55.040 the million dollar question that doesn't have a completely simple answer, 0:00:55.080 --> 0:00:57.279 but we are going to simplify it as much as 0:00:57.280 --> 0:01:00.680 we possibly can today, okay, and then stay next week. 0:01:00.720 --> 0:01:02.640 I'm going to give you kind of like a nitty 0:01:02.640 --> 0:01:05.959 gritty checklist that you can literally use to make sure 0:01:06.000 --> 0:01:09.959 that you are teaching your brain how to practice ease 0:01:10.560 --> 0:01:13.440 versus teaching your brain to practice hard. And it's kind 0:01:13.480 --> 0:01:16.080 of like learning how to speak the language of ease 0:01:16.440 --> 0:01:19.440 that your nervous system is looking to learn, not just 0:01:19.560 --> 0:01:22.040 your mind. So we're going to distinguish between those two things. 0:01:22.319 --> 0:01:24.479 But I'm going to go ahead and just dive on in. 0:01:25.080 --> 0:01:27.479 So I know it's April of twenty twenty four right 0:01:27.480 --> 0:01:30.200 now when I'm recording this, but I want to flash 0:01:30.319 --> 0:01:33.280 back to the holiday season of two thousand and eight 0:01:33.680 --> 0:01:37.720 through twenty thirteen, and so back in what really seems 0:01:37.760 --> 0:01:40.679 like a former lifetime. When I own my own fitness 0:01:40.680 --> 0:01:44.000 studio for women, I used to offer this thing called 0:01:44.080 --> 0:01:48.320 a twenty eight day Holiday Body Challenge, and so every 0:01:48.360 --> 0:01:50.800 single year, what would happen is fifty or so women 0:01:50.840 --> 0:01:52.880 would sign up to work with me during you know 0:01:52.960 --> 0:01:55.680 that tricky time of year between Halloween and New Year's 0:01:56.080 --> 0:01:58.760 while I guided them through the process of you know, 0:01:58.760 --> 0:02:01.600 I'm putting this in air quotes, but dropping pounds fast 0:02:01.760 --> 0:02:04.880 or getting in their skinny genes by New Year's or 0:02:05.200 --> 0:02:07.720 getting rid of that muffin top or whatever words I 0:02:07.760 --> 0:02:09.880 was using in my marketing at the time, right And 0:02:09.919 --> 0:02:12.600 so for the record, I'm no, I'm not proud of that, 0:02:12.720 --> 0:02:15.200 but it's just who I was at the time, and 0:02:15.320 --> 0:02:17.680 I didn't know what I didn't know, and I used 0:02:17.680 --> 0:02:20.639 to punish myself more or less for you know, passing 0:02:20.680 --> 0:02:24.480 on the diet mentality to other women, but I've reconciled 0:02:24.480 --> 0:02:27.200 that shame now and here I am, and I believe 0:02:27.240 --> 0:02:30.960 I'm using it for good. But back to this holiday challenge. Okay, 0:02:31.360 --> 0:02:33.760 So no, it wasn't rocket science. I would just put 0:02:33.800 --> 0:02:36.880 them on a calorie restricted meal plan and have them 0:02:36.919 --> 0:02:39.760 come to my personal training studio or my fitness studio 0:02:39.800 --> 0:02:42.320 at least three times a week to work out, and 0:02:42.360 --> 0:02:45.520 then we would strategically use the holiday so things like 0:02:45.560 --> 0:02:49.240 Thanksgiving Day or Christmas Day as a cheat day. And 0:02:49.320 --> 0:02:51.680 again I'm putting that in air quotes, and I know 0:02:52.200 --> 0:02:55.000 I don't like to use words like cheat anymore, but 0:02:55.120 --> 0:02:57.519 again I didn't know what I didn't know, and those 0:02:57.520 --> 0:02:59.600 were the words that I was using, right, And so, 0:02:59.720 --> 0:03:02.240 of course, as you do when you're in that weight 0:03:02.320 --> 0:03:06.160 loss challenge mode, we took pictures and measurements and body 0:03:06.200 --> 0:03:09.760 fat percentages to measure their progress. And so, as you 0:03:09.840 --> 0:03:14.160 can probably imagine, you know, pounds were dropped and physiques 0:03:14.200 --> 0:03:18.400 were chiseled, and body shaping happened right before our very eyes. 0:03:18.960 --> 0:03:23.440 And yeah, it all worked until it didn't work anymore, right, 0:03:23.919 --> 0:03:26.800 And so things were great for thirty days or six weeks, 0:03:27.160 --> 0:03:30.640 But what happened after that Well, that's the part that 0:03:30.720 --> 0:03:33.840 my own shame and fear of failure really didn't allow 0:03:33.919 --> 0:03:35.600 me to share for a long time. 0:03:35.680 --> 0:03:37.280 Because the truth is is. 0:03:37.200 --> 0:03:41.520 That come January first, that dreaded bounce back effect was 0:03:41.640 --> 0:03:45.200 already in full force. Okay, they had grown tired of 0:03:45.280 --> 0:03:48.640 eking out the energy to monitor and count and measure 0:03:48.680 --> 0:03:51.320 and track every morsel of food that touched their lips, 0:03:51.440 --> 0:03:55.240 and their bodies were exhausted. They were sore and overtrained 0:03:55.360 --> 0:03:59.200 and in need of some major recovery after the literal 0:03:59.240 --> 0:04:02.800 and metaphorical sprint that they just participated in. But also 0:04:03.000 --> 0:04:05.520 their mojo was shot, like they just spent all of 0:04:05.560 --> 0:04:10.040 that time and energy using their limited stores of willpower 0:04:10.080 --> 0:04:13.440 and motivation to keep things going for that few weeks 0:04:13.440 --> 0:04:15.560 that they were there, that by the time the new 0:04:15.640 --> 0:04:18.920 year struck, they had officially nothing left to give, right, 0:04:18.960 --> 0:04:22.839 and their mindsets were starting to bounce back to whatever 0:04:23.040 --> 0:04:27.560 their default was, and oftentimes it was that good, bad, black, 0:04:27.560 --> 0:04:30.560 white in out all or nothing thought process that was 0:04:30.640 --> 0:04:34.600 perpetuating their problems in the first place. And so yes, 0:04:35.000 --> 0:04:38.599 I'm sharing examples from the holiday season, but the problem 0:04:38.640 --> 0:04:42.039 that I'm talking about here is this year round thing right, 0:04:42.440 --> 0:04:46.680 and looking back, I know exactly why it happened to Okay, 0:04:47.000 --> 0:04:51.080 we only made over part of them. We didn't do 0:04:51.400 --> 0:04:54.760 what needed to be done on the inside, like the headwork, 0:04:54.880 --> 0:04:58.479 addressing the actual problem, addressing the right problem, I should say, 0:04:58.839 --> 0:05:03.680 and creating actual brain change. We never address the cause 0:05:03.880 --> 0:05:07.839 of their struggles, their relationship with food, their relationship with 0:05:07.920 --> 0:05:12.279 their body. We just essentially threw another diet, another plan, 0:05:12.480 --> 0:05:15.800 and another short term band aid at the bigger problem. 0:05:15.920 --> 0:05:19.400 And so here's what inevitably happened as a result. Okay, 0:05:19.800 --> 0:05:24.200 the change was temporary and to be on, they always 0:05:24.279 --> 0:05:26.360 had to be on, like they were playing a game 0:05:26.440 --> 0:05:28.960 of all or nothing, and they were either in or 0:05:29.000 --> 0:05:32.720 they were out, and we were addressing the symptoms and 0:05:32.800 --> 0:05:36.600 never addressed the causes going on upstream in their brain. 0:05:37.000 --> 0:05:38.839 So think about it once all of that, you know, 0:05:39.200 --> 0:05:42.239 go hard or go home kind of motivational. 0:05:41.680 --> 0:05:42.799 Raw raw wears off. 0:05:43.200 --> 0:05:46.000 We all go back to our own default thinking, in 0:05:46.080 --> 0:05:49.080 our own default way of living in habits, because we 0:05:49.320 --> 0:05:52.120 are creatures of habit and like that part really is 0:05:52.200 --> 0:05:55.640 just science, right, And boy oh boy, the truth that 0:05:55.680 --> 0:05:59.600 I'm sharing today costs me a lot of shame and heartache. 0:06:00.120 --> 0:06:02.240 And again the truth was, I didn't know what I 0:06:02.240 --> 0:06:02.680 didn't know. 0:06:02.960 --> 0:06:06.120 But in reality, this was some of the most valuable 0:06:06.160 --> 0:06:09.960 experimentation that I ever conducted, because here's what I discovered 0:06:10.000 --> 0:06:13.200 as a result. Some of my clients really only did 0:06:13.320 --> 0:06:16.600 need to change their diet or start exercising more, or 0:06:16.640 --> 0:06:18.919 just be mindful of what they were eating. And so 0:06:19.040 --> 0:06:21.599 for some of those women work out in nutrition programs, 0:06:21.839 --> 0:06:24.839 that was enough to completely change their life forever, right, 0:06:25.240 --> 0:06:27.720 But most of them needed more. Most of them were 0:06:27.760 --> 0:06:30.800 being held back by something bigger, and most of them 0:06:30.839 --> 0:06:33.400 were caught up in the same up down, short term 0:06:33.480 --> 0:06:35.520 you know roller coaster that I had been stuck on 0:06:35.600 --> 0:06:38.560 for decades, And it's that same roller coaster that kept 0:06:38.560 --> 0:06:41.720 me feeling like a slave to dieting and a slave 0:06:41.800 --> 0:06:44.599 to working out harder, faster more. And just like me, 0:06:45.000 --> 0:06:47.960 none of them really had a food problem per se, 0:06:48.120 --> 0:06:51.880 or a motivation problem. It was a thinking problem. It 0:06:51.960 --> 0:06:54.400 was the kind of thinking that they downloaded, they developed. 0:06:54.440 --> 0:06:56.640 It was a language that they learned to speak, and 0:06:56.680 --> 0:07:00.400 more specifically, it was the diet mentality language that was 0:07:00.480 --> 0:07:04.200 causing and perpetuating the problem. And so that all or nothing, 0:07:04.320 --> 0:07:08.640 black white up down roller coaster was the problem. But again, 0:07:08.760 --> 0:07:10.880 if you think that that's normal, or you think that 0:07:10.880 --> 0:07:13.400 that's something that you want to keep getting good at, 0:07:13.680 --> 0:07:15.520 you keep getting back on it, back on it, back 0:07:15.560 --> 0:07:18.480 on it until you realize that that's the real problem. 0:07:18.520 --> 0:07:20.600 But when you're in it, when you're on it, it 0:07:20.640 --> 0:07:23.320 feels like you can't ever get off of it, or 0:07:23.360 --> 0:07:25.640 if you do, you just become terrified that you're going 0:07:25.720 --> 0:07:27.440 to go, you know, gain a bunch of weight or 0:07:27.480 --> 0:07:30.080 go off this metaphorical deep end. And either way, what 0:07:30.200 --> 0:07:32.440 happens is you end up just feeling like a slave 0:07:32.480 --> 0:07:35.640 to it, like you are a hostage. It controls you, 0:07:35.720 --> 0:07:38.160 It controls your life more than you do. And so 0:07:38.320 --> 0:07:40.920 we've talked about this a lot on this podcast, and 0:07:40.960 --> 0:07:43.080 the fact that you're never going to be able to 0:07:43.160 --> 0:07:47.720 outdiet or out willpower or outsmart your relationship with food, 0:07:47.760 --> 0:07:49.520 like never, it's not going to be able to happen, 0:07:50.160 --> 0:07:53.680 and trying to address your internal struggles or the current 0:07:53.840 --> 0:07:57.320 wiring in your brain that's causing you to think and 0:07:57.400 --> 0:07:59.679 act and feel and behave the way that you currently 0:07:59.720 --> 0:08:03.160 are around food or just feel about your body, and 0:08:03.280 --> 0:08:07.840 trying to combat that with another diet or another exercise program. 0:08:08.120 --> 0:08:09.800 I mean it with so much love, but it really 0:08:09.840 --> 0:08:11.360 is just a recipe for failure. 0:08:11.440 --> 0:08:13.960 Like I can flat out guarantee that that will not 0:08:14.120 --> 0:08:17.240 solve the bigger problem because again, you'll never be able 0:08:17.280 --> 0:08:21.160 to outwill power or outsmart your current relationship with food, 0:08:21.160 --> 0:08:24.760 your current relationship with your body, and really until you 0:08:24.800 --> 0:08:27.080 swim upstream. And I'm putting that in air quotes because 0:08:27.120 --> 0:08:28.720 what I really mean is I'm pointing to the brain, 0:08:29.120 --> 0:08:32.520 the nervous system, the source of the problem, and really 0:08:32.559 --> 0:08:35.760 go address your relationship with food and the wiring in 0:08:35.840 --> 0:08:39.840 your brain and go heal that. Diets will end and 0:08:40.120 --> 0:08:42.679 they will fail you, and not because you're a failure, 0:08:42.720 --> 0:08:45.439 but they set you up to fail because your brain 0:08:45.480 --> 0:08:48.520 will never get good at them, and you're going to 0:08:48.600 --> 0:08:51.920 stay stuck on that all or nothing diet roller coaster 0:08:52.320 --> 0:08:55.719 because the solution does not live in another diet or 0:08:55.800 --> 0:08:56.720 program or plan. 0:08:56.840 --> 0:08:58.760 And trust me, like I wish it did. 0:08:58.800 --> 0:09:01.040 At one point in time, I try to outdiet and 0:09:01.080 --> 0:09:04.160 outwill my food struggles and the sugar addictions that I 0:09:04.200 --> 0:09:06.400 realized were not really sugar addiction. It was just I 0:09:06.440 --> 0:09:09.280 practiced a thought process and a pattern of it was 0:09:09.320 --> 0:09:12.000 more like a recipe of thoughts and beliefs and behaviors 0:09:12.240 --> 0:09:14.640 that made me feel like I was addicted to sugar, 0:09:14.679 --> 0:09:17.880 and that's what I was practicing for decades. But bottom line, 0:09:18.080 --> 0:09:20.679 you can't outdiet that it will never get healed from 0:09:20.720 --> 0:09:23.400 a diet or a losing weight or a workout program, 0:09:23.760 --> 0:09:27.400 because you'll just bring the old thinking with you, which 0:09:27.440 --> 0:09:29.959 is really that definition of insanity, you know, doing the 0:09:30.000 --> 0:09:32.640 same thing over and over and again and expecting a 0:09:32.640 --> 0:09:36.360 different result. But when you change what you are seeing, 0:09:36.440 --> 0:09:38.680 and when I say seeing, I mean seeing in you, 0:09:39.040 --> 0:09:41.200 when you're what you're seeing when it comes to what 0:09:41.280 --> 0:09:43.520 you think food will like, the void that it will 0:09:43.600 --> 0:09:46.800 or will not fill, right, and what you're saying to 0:09:47.080 --> 0:09:49.480 yourself and about yourself. So when you see what when 0:09:49.520 --> 0:09:51.520 you change what you're seeing and saying to yourself and 0:09:51.520 --> 0:09:54.400 about yourself, which is really the self image and the identity. 0:09:54.679 --> 0:09:57.240 But then also, yeah, you do need a better strategy 0:09:57.240 --> 0:09:59.280 and system of thinking around food because the whole eat 0:09:59.360 --> 0:10:02.280 less move more calories in, calories out thing. That's a 0:10:02.360 --> 0:10:05.920 logic and reason solution to a deeper emotional struggle. Right, 0:10:06.360 --> 0:10:08.520 But when you change all of that and yes, get 0:10:08.520 --> 0:10:12.480 a better strategy. That is when the diet madness, or 0:10:12.600 --> 0:10:17.320 the body dysmorphia, or the toxic disordered relationship with food 0:10:17.400 --> 0:10:20.600 can finally come to an end and the real healing 0:10:20.679 --> 0:10:21.199 can begin. 0:10:26.440 --> 0:10:28.559 But when you change all of that and yes. 0:10:28.440 --> 0:10:32.199 Get a better strategy, that is when the diet madness, 0:10:32.440 --> 0:10:37.000 or the body dysmorphia, or the toxic disordered relationship with 0:10:37.080 --> 0:10:40.120 food can finally come to an end and the real 0:10:40.240 --> 0:10:44.080 healing can begin. And so that's the part where it's like, okay, Leanne, simple, 0:10:44.160 --> 0:10:46.880 not easy, especially if I've been practicing this my whole life. 0:10:46.920 --> 0:10:49.679 And that's where you know, it's like, okay, is there 0:10:49.720 --> 0:10:51.360 a catch? It's the number one thing I hear when 0:10:51.600 --> 0:10:54.040 people are like, Leanne, I don't even know if that's possible. 0:10:54.120 --> 0:10:56.160 Is there a catch? And there is a catch. 0:10:56.240 --> 0:10:58.199 And it's really like a catch twenty two more and 0:10:58.280 --> 0:10:59.880 more so, I should say, and I call it the 0:11:00.080 --> 0:11:03.240 catch twenty two of dieting because I've never met a 0:11:03.280 --> 0:11:06.520 woman that struggles with food or struggles with her body 0:11:06.760 --> 0:11:10.600 that isn't absolutely one thousand percent sick and tired of 0:11:10.640 --> 0:11:14.000 dieting right, or sick and tired of constantly weighing and 0:11:14.040 --> 0:11:16.600 measuring and calculating because that's what she thinks will keep 0:11:16.600 --> 0:11:19.560 her in control, or sick of, you know, stressing and 0:11:19.600 --> 0:11:22.600 guessing and obsessing over every morsel of food that touches 0:11:22.640 --> 0:11:25.160 her lips or her weight, right, and then of course, 0:11:25.240 --> 0:11:27.320 like you can't help but be sick of all of 0:11:27.360 --> 0:11:29.880 the judgment and the self criticism and the self loathing, 0:11:30.280 --> 0:11:32.200 and don't even get me started on the shame, like 0:11:32.280 --> 0:11:34.800 the shame prison that that keeps you in, and then 0:11:34.880 --> 0:11:38.319 of course getting sick of valuing yourself based on how 0:11:38.400 --> 0:11:40.440 much you weigh or how much you ate that day, 0:11:40.960 --> 0:11:44.040 and sick of absolutely living in a prison, right, a 0:11:44.080 --> 0:11:47.280 prison that is, it's a body prison, it's a food prison, 0:11:47.320 --> 0:11:50.080 it's an emotional prison that when you're in it, you 0:11:50.120 --> 0:11:51.880 don't even know how to get out of it because 0:11:51.920 --> 0:11:54.439 it seems like it just seems normal. And so when 0:11:54.480 --> 0:11:56.880 I talk to women about what they're currently doing to 0:11:57.000 --> 0:12:00.440 address all of those struggles that I just mentioned, ironically, 0:12:00.600 --> 0:12:03.400 dieting is the number one thing I hear, or controlling 0:12:03.440 --> 0:12:06.160 themselves more is the number one thing I hear. And 0:12:06.200 --> 0:12:09.840 so what's happening is, you know, when you're in that cycle, 0:12:09.920 --> 0:12:12.000 like I said, it feels impossible to get out of it. 0:12:12.280 --> 0:12:15.560 You're actively voting on the thing that you hate and 0:12:15.720 --> 0:12:19.280 actively choosing the thing that's keeping you stuck in the prison, 0:12:19.720 --> 0:12:24.000 and actively choosing something that you've probably identified hasn't worked 0:12:24.040 --> 0:12:26.760 and isn't working, and if you get really honest with yourself, 0:12:27.040 --> 0:12:29.600 you know will never work. And that's why I call 0:12:29.679 --> 0:12:32.080 it a catch twenty two because first of all, there's 0:12:32.160 --> 0:12:35.120 absolutely no shame and no judgment around this whatsoever, Like 0:12:35.240 --> 0:12:37.680 this is the cycle that I was stuck in for decades, 0:12:38.160 --> 0:12:40.520 And of course there's nothing but love and compassion for 0:12:40.600 --> 0:12:42.800 those of you if you're listening to this and you're 0:12:42.840 --> 0:12:44.839 stuck on that same up and down roller coaster. 0:12:45.360 --> 0:12:48.760 But it absolutely stinks, right and it is a prison. 0:12:48.840 --> 0:12:50.720 And that's why I'm simply here to just point it 0:12:50.760 --> 0:12:53.520 out and shed some awareness and hopefully just shine a 0:12:53.600 --> 0:12:56.360 light on this catch twenty two that a lot of 0:12:56.360 --> 0:13:00.559 women don't even realize they have become entangled in. Importantly, 0:13:00.640 --> 0:13:03.080 it's really an invitation, because that's what this podcast is 0:13:03.080 --> 0:13:06.040 all about. We're here for just weekly doses of inspiration 0:13:06.120 --> 0:13:09.680 and motivation, but also an invitation, like what if instead 0:13:09.720 --> 0:13:13.320 of committing to another diet or another quick fix. You 0:13:13.559 --> 0:13:18.640 first identified and got really clear on what's not working right, 0:13:18.720 --> 0:13:21.360 and you created an awareness of what not to do 0:13:21.440 --> 0:13:23.840 more of and the road to not keep going down. 0:13:23.880 --> 0:13:27.280 Like what if that was the first step, right, instead 0:13:27.280 --> 0:13:30.200 of committing to another thing or to do or you know, 0:13:30.280 --> 0:13:31.520 do this, eat this. 0:13:31.480 --> 0:13:34.000 Don't eat that. It's like, no, I am going to 0:13:34.160 --> 0:13:35.600 just draw that line on the stand. 0:13:35.480 --> 0:13:37.600 And stop committing to all the things that I know 0:13:37.720 --> 0:13:40.520 don't work and not witness myself trying to commit to 0:13:40.559 --> 0:13:43.040 something that I know will never work. And that's when 0:13:43.080 --> 0:13:45.720 you can get really curious about your struggles instead of 0:13:45.840 --> 0:13:49.080 keeping you in them, and you can identify what's not 0:13:49.200 --> 0:13:52.040 working instead of going down the roads that aren't working. 0:13:52.120 --> 0:13:54.520 Like that's a big difference too, Like, and what if 0:13:54.559 --> 0:13:56.080 that was the game plan? 0:13:56.360 --> 0:13:58.560 And again, I know that might not sound as sexy 0:13:58.559 --> 0:13:59.120 as you know. 0:13:59.240 --> 0:14:02.320 Oh, I've got to get into action action action, because 0:14:02.360 --> 0:14:03.360 it's not a game plan. 0:14:03.440 --> 0:14:04.640 There's no action steps. 0:14:04.679 --> 0:14:06.600 It's not like a go get them tiger, let's raw 0:14:06.679 --> 0:14:10.280 rah and hustle, right, It's really just an awareness and 0:14:10.480 --> 0:14:13.680 thought and mindfulness and insight and a decision to stop 0:14:13.720 --> 0:14:15.120 going down the roads that you. 0:14:15.160 --> 0:14:16.240 Know won't ever work. 0:14:16.600 --> 0:14:19.680 And so when you commit to just stopping the insanity, 0:14:20.240 --> 0:14:23.040 what thoughts does that spark in your beautiful brain? 0:14:23.240 --> 0:14:23.440 Right? 0:14:23.480 --> 0:14:25.400 And that's really what we're here to do today is 0:14:25.480 --> 0:14:29.080 help you shift the thinking that's causing your current results 0:14:29.080 --> 0:14:32.360 and outcomes. And if you're listening to this podcast, it's 0:14:32.440 --> 0:14:35.960 probably because you know the subject of health or what 0:14:36.080 --> 0:14:37.720 to eat or what not to eat, or food or 0:14:37.760 --> 0:14:40.800 your body, they are eluding you, right, And if you're 0:14:40.840 --> 0:14:44.240 stuck in the prison or feeling like a prisoner to 0:14:44.520 --> 0:14:46.360 you know, gaining and losing and gaining and losing, or 0:14:46.360 --> 0:14:50.000 feeling obsessed over that loss or that gain, or simply 0:14:50.040 --> 0:14:52.480 stuck in the black white, all or nothing binge restrict 0:14:52.600 --> 0:14:55.560 roller coaster, or if you're like me and you are 0:14:55.640 --> 0:14:58.440 just falling through the cracks because maybe you don't fit 0:14:58.680 --> 0:15:02.200 neat and tidy into a category of a typical eating disorder. 0:15:02.200 --> 0:15:03.840 That was for me, I was just like, Okay, if 0:15:03.880 --> 0:15:05.600 I don't have an eating disorder, what is this? It 0:15:05.600 --> 0:15:08.480 felt like a gray area, right, And that gray area 0:15:08.520 --> 0:15:09.560 can make you feel. 0:15:09.400 --> 0:15:10.480 Very stuck and alone. 0:15:10.640 --> 0:15:13.320 But that's why it's so important to just have these 0:15:13.360 --> 0:15:17.200 conversations like to get really real and yeah, I mean, 0:15:17.240 --> 0:15:19.200 you can play the diet game and you can play 0:15:19.200 --> 0:15:21.320 it over and over again and never break the cycle. 0:15:21.920 --> 0:15:23.840 Or you can do what we're doing right here, which 0:15:23.880 --> 0:15:26.640 is to change your thinking and get really real about 0:15:26.640 --> 0:15:29.680 the problem that's causing the struggles so that you can 0:15:30.080 --> 0:15:33.160 break out of the definition of insanity. But that being said, 0:15:33.200 --> 0:15:34.640 and I mean this with so much love, and I 0:15:34.640 --> 0:15:36.840 hope you're taking it with the love that I mean it. 0:15:37.320 --> 0:15:39.880 If you want to do differently, you do have to 0:15:39.920 --> 0:15:42.320 think differently, and you have to break the cycle of 0:15:42.320 --> 0:15:45.640 insanity and not fool yourself into thinking like, oh maybe 0:15:45.680 --> 0:15:49.600 one day control, restrict, deprive, you know, obsess over my food, 0:15:49.800 --> 0:15:51.840 over food and my weight will actually work, because I'm 0:15:51.840 --> 0:15:54.600 telling you, it will just create more of the obsession. 0:15:54.920 --> 0:15:55.680 And here's the thing. 0:15:55.720 --> 0:15:59.440 Most women, unfortunately, I mean, they won't stop and do this, 0:15:59.760 --> 0:16:02.120 or they don't think that this work is sexy. It's 0:16:02.120 --> 0:16:04.280 not as sexy as lose twenty pounds and twenty minutes, 0:16:04.320 --> 0:16:04.600 you know. 0:16:04.520 --> 0:16:04.960 What I mean. 0:16:05.520 --> 0:16:07.520 And a lot of women will just go look for 0:16:07.560 --> 0:16:10.120 the next game of control or the next action item. 0:16:10.200 --> 0:16:13.680 But those of you that do that, stop the definition 0:16:13.720 --> 0:16:16.400 of insanity you're going to find that your journey to 0:16:16.480 --> 0:16:20.080 healing and to finally ending the suffering and struggling can 0:16:20.120 --> 0:16:23.560 actually begin. And so, coming back to the question at 0:16:23.560 --> 0:16:25.440 the top of this episode of like, does it ever 0:16:25.520 --> 0:16:26.280 get easier? 0:16:26.400 --> 0:16:27.600 And so the short. 0:16:27.400 --> 0:16:31.480 Answer is yes if you practice ease, and the short 0:16:31.520 --> 0:16:36.000 answer is no if you practice hard. And so we're 0:16:36.040 --> 0:16:37.680 going to get into the nitty gritty of what I 0:16:37.720 --> 0:16:40.760 mean by that and what that looks like specifically next week, 0:16:40.840 --> 0:16:42.520 and I'm literally going to give you a checklist of 0:16:42.520 --> 0:16:45.040 what your brain and your nervous system dictates as hard 0:16:45.080 --> 0:16:47.640 and easy so that you can, like, you know, use 0:16:47.680 --> 0:16:49.880 it as kind of a check in with yourself to 0:16:49.960 --> 0:16:53.000 make sure that you're teaching your brain ease as opposed 0:16:53.040 --> 0:16:55.800 to taking it down the dead end road of practicing hard. Okay, 0:16:56.280 --> 0:16:59.360 So I hope today's conversation simply opened your eyes, or 0:16:59.400 --> 0:17:01.960 maybe just played some seeds, or sometimes we just need 0:17:02.000 --> 0:17:04.360 a mirror to be held up to us to realize, Okay, 0:17:04.600 --> 0:17:06.439 what I'm doing is not working and it's not going 0:17:06.480 --> 0:17:09.000 to create happiness, and it's actually out voting health and 0:17:09.160 --> 0:17:12.320 out voting happiness. And that's the conversation I needed to 0:17:12.359 --> 0:17:14.679 have and so if that's all you needed today, then 0:17:14.720 --> 0:17:16.719 I'm glad that you got that. But we are going 0:17:16.800 --> 0:17:18.680 to be back next week with more of the nitty 0:17:18.720 --> 0:17:21.959 gritty and some actionable steps that you can take in 0:17:22.000 --> 0:17:24.680 the meantime, If you do want to learn more about 0:17:24.720 --> 0:17:26.680 how to turn off the part of your brain that's 0:17:26.720 --> 0:17:30.040 obsessed with food or obsessed with your weight and really 0:17:30.200 --> 0:17:33.640 rewire your own brain for peace and freedom, then head 0:17:33.680 --> 0:17:36.520 on over to stressless eeating dot com and just sign 0:17:36.600 --> 0:17:39.600 up to watch the Stressless Eating sneak preview where I've 0:17:39.720 --> 0:17:43.240 literally peeled back. It's really the system that I teach 0:17:43.280 --> 0:17:46.480 my clients to heal themselves of the all or nothing 0:17:46.520 --> 0:17:50.800 diet mentality for good, but without restriction and punishing your body, 0:17:50.880 --> 0:17:54.359 and definitely without having to use words like Macro's or 0:17:54.440 --> 0:17:55.840 low carb or calorie count. 0:17:55.920 --> 0:17:57.760 Right. So it's all there for. 0:17:57.800 --> 0:18:00.960 You, easy to access over at stress life eating dot 0:18:01.000 --> 0:18:04.560 com and if you like outweigh, I actually have another 0:18:04.640 --> 0:18:07.560 podcast here on iheartwhere I talk about all of this 0:18:07.640 --> 0:18:10.679 self image and body image stuff but from the perspective 0:18:10.760 --> 0:18:15.000 of where brain science intersex faith okay, and so it's 0:18:15.000 --> 0:18:17.159 called What's God Got to Do with It? And You 0:18:17.240 --> 0:18:20.320 can access it here on iHeart or wherever you get 0:18:20.359 --> 0:18:23.520 your podcast. So that is it for today. I am 0:18:23.640 --> 0:18:28.680 Leanne Ellington and I will talk to you soon. Bye.