Speaker 1: Are you leaving? I you want your way back home?
Speaker 2: Either way, we want to be there.
Speaker 3: Doesn't matter how much baggage you claim, and give us
Speaker 3: time and a termino and gage.
Speaker 4: We want to send you off in style.
Speaker 5: We wanna welcome you back home.
Speaker 3: Tell us all about it.
Speaker 1: We scared her?
Speaker 6: Was it fine?
Speaker 1: Malforn?
Speaker 4: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 5: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Do your need you ride?
Speaker 7: Ride?
Speaker 8: Do you need.
Speaker 4: With Karen and Chris welcome to Do you need a ride?
Speaker 1: This is Chris Fairbanks and this is Karen Kilgarriff.
Speaker 4: It's a beautiful What time of year is it? We'll
Speaker 4: never know.
Speaker 1: Spring winter, spring.
Speaker 6: It was cold for a couple of weeks, and I
Speaker 6: purchased a bunch of warm clothing and now I do
Speaker 6: not need.
Speaker 1: It until tomorrow.
Speaker 4: Until tomorrow. What happens tomorrow is get this.
Speaker 1: All changes tomorrow?
Speaker 4: Oh good? It all changes because I got some beautiful sweaters.
Speaker 1: Try to figure out a way to wear three in
Speaker 1: one day?
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, I do.
Speaker 6: Even when I don't leave the house, there are costume changes.
Speaker 6: I have alternate flat people laid out of my bed.
Speaker 1: Flat people laid out on your bed.
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's what my dad.
Speaker 6: Used to call them when I put out my little outfits.
Speaker 6: I think I's more organized as a child. I would
Speaker 6: put my outfits on my bed getting ready, and my
Speaker 6: dad called.
Speaker 4: It laying out a flat person. I love it. Yeah,
Speaker 4: it's a cute little See. Let's start with something cute.
Speaker 3: I mean, finally giving the people what they want, precious
Speaker 3: childhood memories.
Speaker 6: That is what you want. Okay, this is a light
Speaker 6: loose lucy, we have it. We keep it loose, keep
Speaker 6: it loose, and we enforce the goose.
Speaker 1: I grew up with two geese at my Aunt Jean's house.
Speaker 3: They are the worst animal, worse than the worst animal
Speaker 3: you can think of, worse than snakes.
Speaker 4: And we're going to get a handwritten letter because of
Speaker 4: that one.
Speaker 3: I hope it's on blue Goose Country stationery, because I
Speaker 3: have a bone to pick with geese.
Speaker 1: They're fucking awful.
Speaker 6: Have you ever hung out with a disgruntled full sized
Speaker 6: turkey not to have a foul contest.
Speaker 1: You're trying to out foul me and it won't work.
Speaker 3: The thing about it is, I'm just gonna make something
Speaker 3: up right now, based on my experience and then just
Speaker 3: me trying to be argumentative. I think geese are smarter
Speaker 3: than turkeys, which makes them more dangerous.
Speaker 4: Right, Like they're they mean it. They have malice.
Speaker 3: They're coming at you and you're a child, that's all.
Speaker 3: It's that they're like feral for six year olds, right.
Speaker 4: And the ones that I spend a lot of time.
Speaker 6: With geese where at the Wilson Harding golf courses.
Speaker 4: Oh, they are everywhere and they're used to people. But
Speaker 4: still you have to be like, I'm coming up.
Speaker 6: My ball is between you, guys, and I've approached them,
Speaker 6: and they're like, they will not move, and I make
Speaker 6: any sudden movement movements, they will start beaking me.
Speaker 3: Well, the thing they do and I don't know if
Speaker 3: they do this at Wilson Harding, but we grew up
Speaker 3: with the kind of geese that hiss at you, right,
Speaker 3: and it is frightening.
Speaker 4: Yeah, because they use them black tongue.
Speaker 3: Yes, and their long necks. It's like their part snake.
Speaker 3: They're a mythical creature.
Speaker 6: They are a sock puppet. I refuse to believe they're
Speaker 6: even real. It's a human hand in a bag.
Speaker 1: Horrifying.
Speaker 6: Yeah, it's a it's a it's a hissing bagpipe.
Speaker 4: But turkeys add sharp edges.
Speaker 3: Yes, they have lots of They can kill things. They're
Speaker 3: not to be messed with. But they're so stupid that
Speaker 3: there are turkey farmers that say, if they look up
Speaker 3: while it's raining, they'll drown. I don't know if that's
Speaker 3: literal or if that's just an example of how truly
Speaker 3: stupid they are.
Speaker 4: But wait, could you could you repeat that if.
Speaker 3: They look up while it's raining, they'll drown, all right,
Speaker 3: because they're like not smart enough.
Speaker 1: To or swallow.
Speaker 4: I like that. I've never heard that. I need to
Speaker 4: hang out with more farmers.
Speaker 3: You need to get up to the Tom Turkey Farm,
Speaker 3: which used to be in Sonoma near my parents' house,
Speaker 3: just for the quotes, just for the fucking yeah, the
Speaker 3: chit chat, chopping it up with those turkey farmers.
Speaker 1: Come on leaning on a fence.
Speaker 4: Oh, it's been a while since I leaned on a fence.
Speaker 3: I mean, that's that's living. You did, You did your work.
Speaker 3: Now you get to lean a little bit.
Speaker 4: It's been a while since I mended a fence. And
Speaker 4: I have mended a fence.
Speaker 1: What type barbed.
Speaker 4: Wire? Those are two different types. I have had.
Speaker 6: There's a documentary about the gathering of artists for the
Speaker 6: We Are the World recording. Heard of it, Yes, and
Speaker 6: and yes, I've the song. I can't get out of
Speaker 6: my head now since I watched it, because I followed
Speaker 6: it up by watching the video over and over. But
Speaker 6: it is so interesting to see who is humbled in
Speaker 6: that room and nervous as hell, like Huey Lewis all
Speaker 6: politics aside, and Bob Dylan are They're like, oh my god,
Speaker 6: I'm in a room with all these people, and Michael
Speaker 6: Jackson's here, and whereas like Diane Warwick was like when.
Speaker 4: Is this thing over?
Speaker 1: She was running the show.
Speaker 6: It is so interesting to watch how nervous people got
Speaker 6: and a lot of the most It really was important
Speaker 6: for me to watch because the people that are most
Speaker 6: nervous killed it. The artist Yes, and it is so
Speaker 6: fun to watch because I knew nothing of that day.
Speaker 6: Lionel Ritchie was hosting like the American Music Awards, I think,
Speaker 6: and had a bunch of you know stuff he had
Speaker 6: to memorize for that, and then that night they were
Speaker 6: they just happened to be recording this We.
Speaker 4: Are the World thing.
Speaker 6: And that the day for him and him writing with
Speaker 6: Michael Jackson. It was just it's a very fun watch.
Speaker 6: I just wanted to endorse that for some reason. Going
Speaker 6: to watch it, I think you're my age especially, you
Speaker 6: will enjoy it.
Speaker 1: I remember when it premiered.
Speaker 3: I remember living my entire life through MTV and the
Speaker 3: things that presented to us. If if if they were
Speaker 3: sad about people in Africa or apartheid or whatever was happening,
Speaker 3: they told me how to feel, and I felt it right.
Speaker 6: And most of the artists that showed up, like Kenny Loggins,
Speaker 6: was like, I knew nothing about apartheid in Africa or famine,
Speaker 6: and because I think it was more yeah about that.
Speaker 4: Yeah. Yeah, And it.
Speaker 6: Premiered globally at the exact same time, like it was
Speaker 6: promoted that things aren't like that anymore. You just get
Speaker 6: it immediately. Yeah, And it did raise a lot of money.
Speaker 6: It's really kind of cool. So I'm deciding this episode
Speaker 6: is dedicated.
Speaker 4: I'm kidding.
Speaker 6: I couldn't even think of a thing because I don't
Speaker 6: want to make light of dedications.
Speaker 3: You want to make a light of people doing good
Speaker 3: with their entertainment platforms, right, Yeah, yes, I get that.
Speaker 6: We are here to be light even though we know
Speaker 6: things are happening, and it's all I think about God damn,
Speaker 6: But you and I are here to be have fun together.
Speaker 3: Right, Yes, absolutely, yes, yes, have fun And then this
Speaker 3: can be a slight break in between people having to
Speaker 3: deal with everything going on.
Speaker 4: There's a lot of pressure.
Speaker 6: People are asking artists and comedians to be the voice,
Speaker 6: and I, for instance, I'm all for protesting.
Speaker 4: You know that.
Speaker 6: Yes, we saw at work that scary murdering cop went
Speaker 6: to jail because people kept protesting.
Speaker 4: I was on the fence about it.
Speaker 6: I'm like, come on, breaking into things, and then it
Speaker 6: worked and I'm like okay.
Speaker 3: And also, did you see any of those stories where
Speaker 3: like the breaking into things was faked and there was
Speaker 3: people that were going around. I mean, like yes, the
Speaker 3: stuff that was actually happening was so mind blowing, and
Speaker 3: it was when people started using video on Twitter, right,
Speaker 3: so like that, I mean, it's just so fascinating of
Speaker 3: like the things that have been exposed and the way
Speaker 3: we understand kind of systemic corruption now where as white
Speaker 3: people we never had to understand it before because it
Speaker 3: didn't come into our lives at all, Right, it's just.
Speaker 1: It's such a good change, but man, is it huge.
Speaker 6: But at the same time, when to put the word
Speaker 6: out about global warming, which is happening, and you and
Speaker 6: I of course know that, but by pouring soup, they
Speaker 6: they got the Mona Lisa again, and I just didn't.
Speaker 6: I just I understand that the reason is people are
Speaker 6: going to pay attention to this, but is it the
Speaker 6: right attention where you're annoyed and angered?
Speaker 1: They threw soup on the Mona Lisa. Yes, but doesn't
Speaker 1: she have a plastic box over her at this point?
Speaker 6: Yes, but it's still a apparently as emitting methane gas
Speaker 6: because they I just don't.
Speaker 3: Yeah, they're just trying to say, none of this will
Speaker 3: be here if the world, if we are flooded and
Speaker 3: we're all dead.
Speaker 4: But why take it out on art, is my point. Yeah.
Speaker 3: I think it is that thing of like it's because
Speaker 3: we're saying, oh, that's too precious, and then the protesters
Speaker 3: are like, no, no, we think our lives are more precious.
Speaker 6: Yeah, and it is the reason I'm talking about it
Speaker 6: right now, which is the purpose.
Speaker 4: But the connection is vague for me. That's all.
Speaker 3: Well, I can think of valuable things that they should
Speaker 3: also ruin right before the most beautiful things that have
Speaker 3: ever seen.
Speaker 6: Exactly, how about defacing many many gas stations.
Speaker 1: Or golf courses have.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I'm on the fence, so now I'm on the
Speaker 6: fence that I just mended. Yeah, it's true. Every time
Speaker 6: I go, I'm like, boy, I'm a water wasting problem contributor.
Speaker 6: And then my swing is perfect. It helps me hit straight.
Speaker 6: But you know, knowing that I'm.
Speaker 1: Wrong, it's we're all kind of wrong in some ways.
Speaker 3: And then the wrongest part is that, especially when it
Speaker 3: comes to like global warming, individual people should feel guilty
Speaker 3: and it's like it's up it's up to us to
Speaker 3: blame each other when and everyone knows this from social media,
Speaker 3: but it's like it's these corporations that if they don't
Speaker 3: change their carbon footprint, it won't matter what we do.
Speaker 1: And that's the that's the deep down truth.
Speaker 6: This person, Yeah, they don't care. They know they're big,
Speaker 6: they know they weigh several one hundred tons. That's probably
Speaker 6: wrong at least ten. And this truck just pulled in
Speaker 6: front of us.
Speaker 1: I mean he was like, he's clearly pro global warming.
Speaker 6: It was that's fine, Tomato soup in your face, sir, Yeah,
Speaker 6: is what I say.
Speaker 3: Throw a big fucking thing of chunky Campbell's right onto that.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, kunky chambles.
Speaker 1: What you say?
Speaker 6: Thank you, thank you for remembering old jokes that I'm
Speaker 6: ashamed of. Trambles Kunkie gradually turned into character character which you.
Speaker 1: Know what that makes me think of? Have I ever
Speaker 1: told you about it?
Speaker 3: Dina Martina, who is a drag queen that is the
Speaker 3: funniest performer.
Speaker 4: I don't know that I do know her as.
Speaker 3: This character, Dina Martina mispronounces, she like confuses and switches
Speaker 3: around g's and j's, and she does it so consistently,
Speaker 3: and the character is almost like your mom's kooky drunk friend, right,
Speaker 3: And it is the funniest, Like go home and look
Speaker 3: her up on YouTube. One of the funniest live comedy
Speaker 3: acts I've ever seen.
Speaker 4: Just like example, be Gallapenno.
Speaker 3: I can't do it because it's so fucking specific and
Speaker 3: it's so subtle and it's they never miss one.
Speaker 1: I believe she likes to be called her.
Speaker 6: I believe I Yeah, the person I'm a huge fan
Speaker 6: of that I almost want to go see live. It's
Speaker 6: that Broadway Barbara. Nothing makes me laugh harder. It's the character.
Speaker 6: It's a woman who's playing an older dancer that is.
Speaker 1: From Yes, Yes, Yes, and I've seen her.
Speaker 6: She's so deep in the character and says the funniest shit.
Speaker 6: It's just my favorite. I laughed so hard I rewatch it.
Speaker 6: I just want Broadway, Barbara.
Speaker 3: I bet you could see that performer at a live
Speaker 3: show somewhere, don't you think?
Speaker 4: I think so?
Speaker 6: I think so, yeah, And then I'm like, am I
Speaker 6: going to see a musical? There's certain I need to
Speaker 6: quit with my hang ups. I was scarred by Ghost
Speaker 6: the Musical. I need to start going and seeing live
Speaker 6: not stand up performance.
Speaker 1: Ghost the Musical the first musical you ever saw.
Speaker 6: Yes, And I was laughing out loud because it was
Speaker 6: in English.
Speaker 4: I think it was an opera. It was what I
Speaker 4: believe it was an opera.
Speaker 1: Is this real?
Speaker 6: It was real and it was amazing. After I was
Speaker 6: making fun of it for a while because the on
Speaker 6: stage special effects where they mimicked scenes from Ghosts. It
Speaker 6: started with hilarity because it's like, I love our new place.
Speaker 4: We should put the couch over there.
Speaker 6: And so I'm like, oh my god, what have I
Speaker 6: gone to for free. But then scenes like where the
Speaker 6: mugger gets carried off by demons they were projecting I
Speaker 6: feel like I've talked about this before, but it's still
Speaker 6: on my mind. They were projecting like these ghost images
Speaker 6: on a screen in front of the stage and carrying
Speaker 6: them off on like cables.
Speaker 4: So it really looked like.
Speaker 6: More so than in the movie where the special effects
Speaker 6: were you know, from the late eighties, it really looked
Speaker 6: like demons were carrying this guy off.
Speaker 4: Like I was terrified a couple times.
Speaker 6: Oh, the scene where the guy is teaching him how
Speaker 6: to flick a penny on the subway they are on,
Speaker 6: it's just people standing and then behind them projected was
Speaker 6: everything rushing by as if they were on a moving subway,
Speaker 6: and projected in front of them was the actual subway car,
Speaker 6: so it looked like people on a subway car. It
Speaker 6: was absolutely amazing.
Speaker 4: And that's it was.
Speaker 1: That's Broadway.
Speaker 4: That's Broadway, baby.
Speaker 3: I mean, that's the cool thing is that the people
Speaker 3: designing stagecraft for Broadway, they're the people.
Speaker 1: They're the top of the top.
Speaker 3: So that kind of shit, like, that's that's what they're
Speaker 3: known for, right, because what's happening on the stage is
Speaker 3: just as important as who's in it, how good of
Speaker 3: a singer they are, how good songs are.
Speaker 4: Whatever.
Speaker 6: Yeah, that work, and just props in general. When I
Speaker 6: props to props, this is what you're doing. When I
Speaker 6: did ConA in a very very long time ago, I
Speaker 6: think ten years when we first started podcasting, remember that,
Speaker 6: and I gave you called me and gave me a
Speaker 6: good luck you got this kid message yep, which I appreciate.
Speaker 4: Thank you, You're welcome.
Speaker 1: Ten years later.
Speaker 4: Yes, I never said thank you. Yes you did well.
Speaker 4: Here it is again.
Speaker 1: It's a reunion.
Speaker 6: Yes, I hope you never tire of the thanks I give.
Speaker 6: But backstage at CONAIN they were just making giant props
Speaker 6: for jokes, mostly like and it looked like the funnest job.
Speaker 6: If I were to quit show business, well I wouldn't
Speaker 6: be quitting.
Speaker 4: I would. I would go into the props department.
Speaker 6: No, you should, You're built for that. I enjoy making things.
Speaker 6: I appreciate the work. And I want to be in
Speaker 6: a union.
Speaker 1: Yes as all yeah, all good reasons.
Speaker 3: You know.
Speaker 4: I'm union strong.
Speaker 3: I wonder if there's ever going to be a show
Speaker 3: that would need miniatures made for it.
Speaker 6: Oh, that would be really I mean, if I could
Speaker 6: be just But then I think, what what if I
Speaker 6: was making backgrounds for Wallace and Grammont or something. One
Speaker 6: of the reasons I got into miniatures because those are
Speaker 6: like little dioramas and they do the stop motion little
Speaker 6: Clay people.
Speaker 1: Right, I uh, your man explaining Wallace and Grommitt to
Speaker 1: me right now?
Speaker 6: Yes, yes, as a man, let me tell you how
Speaker 6: that show works.
Speaker 7: Great?
Speaker 6: Yes, uh, your dainty fingers can't quite grasp if you will.
Speaker 4: That's actually pretty good.
Speaker 6: It's distracting from the very offensive character I was doing.
Speaker 4: I uh, do you?
Speaker 6: I Actually often I feel like people don't realize things
Speaker 6: like Chicken run are Clay being manipulated during my frame?
Speaker 6: So I do explain it to people because very often,
Speaker 6: and I'll be a boy, or.
Speaker 4: They assume it's computers. Yes, it's everybody.
Speaker 3: No, you're right though, that is a huge achievement, or
Speaker 3: like any of those I almost said Will Wheaton, Wes
Speaker 3: Anderson movies, Yeah, come on in here, you stupid asshole. Yeah, sorry, Freeway,
Speaker 3: the wes Anderson movies like Fantastic Mister Fox. We will
Speaker 3: watch that anytime we're flipping around and I met my
Speaker 3: dad's with Nora. We love that movie so much, and
Speaker 3: it is all of that was done by hand, none
Speaker 3: of it is.
Speaker 4: It takes years, yeah, to make this.
Speaker 1: Stuff just moving. You know, a little fox in a
Speaker 1: grocery store.
Speaker 6: Take a picture, love a whisker, so it's flapping in
Speaker 6: the wind. That's so am I am I ready to
Speaker 6: sign up for those kind of hours.
Speaker 4: That's my only issue.
Speaker 1: Well, because it'll cut into your golfing.
Speaker 4: I cut man of leisure.
Speaker 1: Yes, you don't like working really.
Speaker 4: No years of fence mending.
Speaker 1: I was, Oh, this was like a honk.
Speaker 4: To let us know. Either you get sideswiped or heed
Speaker 4: my call.
Speaker 1: Sir. Now I'm going to go faster. You will not
Speaker 1: be get.
Speaker 4: God.
Speaker 1: I love to box out a land Rover. Fuck you.
Speaker 3: Okay, calm down, everybody, everyone, calm down, stop it, knock
Speaker 3: it off.
Speaker 6: Let's we're all one. We're all one organism moving together.
Speaker 6: That's how you have to look at traffic.
Speaker 1: That's true. We leave our brothers out.
Speaker 4: We are plate. Let's trying to mend an aortic.
Speaker 6: Uhsort take this a hole in a part of a heart.
Speaker 4: That's I think.
Speaker 6: What's happening right now in my brain is what I'm describing.
Speaker 3: You're describing the actions of your brain as it's breaking.
Speaker 6: Yes, yes, oh God, play by play of my mental breakdown.
Speaker 1: Listen to it live, platelet by platelet.
Speaker 7: Wait.
Speaker 1: I had a going off of what we were just
Speaker 1: talking about.
Speaker 4: I do change the subject a lot.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yes, yeah.
Speaker 4: We were talking about musicals.
Speaker 1: It doesn't.
Speaker 4: Then we talked about broad White, Barbara, we.
Speaker 1: Talked about Dina Martinez, even.
Speaker 4: Though we didn't want to. I brought up fences again.
Speaker 1: Oh, fences, That's what it was.
Speaker 3: Oh see you you've built a barbed and you've built
Speaker 3: a plane wire or just barbed or were lying?
Speaker 6: I mean I was kind of bending the truth a
Speaker 6: little bit. But I just do want people to know
Speaker 6: that for a time I did work with my hands
Speaker 6: and I helped bury snowmaking equipment.
Speaker 4: I worked at a ski area.
Speaker 1: What is enough to do with fence?
Speaker 4: There was fences.
Speaker 1: There and you had to sometimes mend them.
Speaker 4: Yes, yes, are you what?
Speaker 1: Why are you lying? It seems like I'm not.
Speaker 4: I'm not. I'm not.
Speaker 6: I'm just trying to remember as I as I make
Speaker 6: things or recall the truth.
Speaker 3: I see, I see yes, and in the meantime you'll
Speaker 3: just say whatever.
Speaker 6: Oftentimes yes, you know me, it's just my mouth is
Speaker 6: a scruntled man with diarrhea.
Speaker 4: I have a lot of them. Were snow fences.
Speaker 1: Okay? What are those made of metal?
Speaker 6: Sometimes with like a plastic lattice like mesh. Oh, yes,
Speaker 6: okay that I don't know what the I should know
Speaker 6: more about them since I was in charge of them,
Speaker 6: but I think.
Speaker 1: It keeps pee skiers out of the main.
Speaker 6: It might have to do something with directing traffic, but
Speaker 6: it also holds snow into place, maybe for avalanches.
Speaker 4: Sure I should know this.
Speaker 3: I mean, did you actually work there or were you
Speaker 3: just touching the fences after you snow.
Speaker 6: Did Every year I've worked off my season pass, which
Speaker 6: was expensive. You know, it's like five hundred bucks probably
Speaker 6: now it's a thousand and so I drive up to
Speaker 6: this gay area all summer and new just maintenance jobs. Oh,
Speaker 6: carrying dirt from one place the other. Sometimes it was dynamite. No,
Speaker 6: always in a truck called the war Pig, which I
Speaker 6: was not licensed to drive.
Speaker 4: And you were oh yeah, with T and T.
Speaker 6: With T and T and sometimes with a bit of
Speaker 6: alcohol buzz. Yes, because it was boring work. And I
Speaker 6: think I for a good portion of my life maybe
Speaker 6: had a drinking problem.
Speaker 4: You know, I've talked about that well.
Speaker 1: I mean, yeah, if you're a comic.
Speaker 6: It was also the weekend, you know, a lot of
Speaker 6: it was the weekend that we'd go up there. One
Speaker 6: time in the war pig, I was like, we can
Speaker 6: navigate these giant things of dirt and I broke I
Speaker 6: hope you're listening, Pat, my old boss.
Speaker 4: I broke the axle.
Speaker 6: On the war pig. Oh shit, And I heard it crunch.
Speaker 6: And then one other wheels just wasn't steering. I think
Speaker 6: it was the how.
Speaker 1: Many steering wheels was in the war pick?
Speaker 6: Just one just for the driver. The other one was
Speaker 6: plastic of Fisher price one. So my worker friend felt
Speaker 6: like he was contributing.
Speaker 1: He worked with Maggie Simpson.
Speaker 4: He was a child.
Speaker 6: Yes, amazing on the saxophone, but it took away from
Speaker 6: the work we're doing.
Speaker 4: But woodn't hear for music? A little yellow bastard?
Speaker 1: Wait what Okay?
Speaker 3: You were driving the warpig with and one other person
Speaker 3: was with you, and you were lighting off sticks of
Speaker 3: dynamite and throwing them into potential avalanche areas, and that
Speaker 3: was boring for you.
Speaker 1: I was not.
Speaker 4: I was not lighting that.
Speaker 6: I simply moved the dynamite that was later to be
Speaker 6: used in the winter for purposefully making avalanches happen, so
Speaker 6: they didn't happen.
Speaker 3: Accidentally being involved in dynamite in any way, and boredom,
Speaker 3: I don't think should go hand in hand.
Speaker 4: I know, you should at least have a boiler's license or.
Speaker 3: Something, but I mean that would add to the lack
Speaker 3: of boredom. But you're not able to handle right it,
Speaker 3: and yet you're being forced to.
Speaker 1: Yes, I know, and you're still bored because it's the weekend.
Speaker 6: I don't I appreciate the work now, you know, when's
Speaker 6: the last time I had a blister?
Speaker 4: These hands, they're so dainty.
Speaker 6: Anyway, the following weekend we went up there and we
Speaker 6: had to pile into the war pig and Pat was like, God,
Speaker 6: damn it, I just broke the axle.
Speaker 1: And I's like you did, Oh no, well you shouldn't
Speaker 1: have done that.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I steer it more carefully than you do. Like
Speaker 6: last weekend when I was driving it. You can't wrench
Speaker 6: it like that, Pat, I had broken.
Speaker 1: It yeah, yeah, and Pat took the hit.
Speaker 4: Pat took the hit. Sorry Pat?
Speaker 1: Did Pat have to pay?
Speaker 4: I don't know.
Speaker 6: I don't know that they ever fixed it. I think
Speaker 6: they probably just kept driving it around. This was a
Speaker 6: like from the sixties.
Speaker 4: Yeah. It was big and heavy.
Speaker 3: And filled with tant Yes, you were like, let's definitely
Speaker 3: not repair this or make this any safer.
Speaker 6: I do it is it's it just was buried in
Speaker 6: my memory that I was.
Speaker 4: Responsible for explosives at one point.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's that's a big one. Bring it to the front.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I say, you can trade right to the front
Speaker 3: of it. If your memory is you holding a handful
Speaker 3: of cards, you trade that one out with hip surgery.
Speaker 3: Just just blank that out entirely and bring TNT right
Speaker 3: to the front and center.
Speaker 6: Chris Fairbanks explosives expert and.
Speaker 3: Then also comedian, Yeah, but also real blase like barely
Speaker 3: can get interested.
Speaker 4: Yeah, can you can you tell me more? You know what,
Speaker 4: I like to keep it behind me.
Speaker 1: I like to forget about it all the time.
Speaker 4: Yeah, that was Those were good times. And I did
Speaker 4: work very hard.
Speaker 1: You're working for the ski, I mean.
Speaker 4: It was a good time. Yeah, other people worked harder
Speaker 4: than me.
Speaker 6: And sometimes I would remind them, you know, at the
Speaker 6: end of this, I get the same season pass as you,
Speaker 6: and then I put straw in my mouth and lower
Speaker 6: my hat down and they'd be like, oh, fair BENCHWAYZ
Speaker 6: he's so cool. What were other people doing more of?
Speaker 3: Do you think they just knew how to do stuff
Speaker 3: and you were just kind of apprenticing?
Speaker 6: No, none of us, None of us were skilled in
Speaker 6: any way.
Speaker 1: Nobody was.
Speaker 4: We simply showed up.
Speaker 6: I don't even remember how we found out you could
Speaker 6: work off a pass.
Speaker 4: I don't even know that they do.
Speaker 3: That sounds like something you heard on the Grapevine. Yes, yes,
Speaker 3: along the Grapevine.
Speaker 6: Yes, up Grapevine hillpe Cree.
Speaker 4: But yeah. And the boss that was the owner.
Speaker 6: Of the the ski area was also a doctor, and
Speaker 6: he mended my nose every time I got broken, you know,
Speaker 6: for my smart mouth.
Speaker 1: All over that hill, people punching you.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 6: I remember one time we were watching him dig and
Speaker 6: his leg was trembling, trying to push the shovel in
Speaker 6: the dirt because he was showing us what he wanted
Speaker 6: us to do, But the dirt was very firm and
Speaker 6: he couldn't get it in there. And when I was
Speaker 6: months later high on I believe cocaine. Oh, that they
Speaker 6: get administered during the straightening of my broken nose for real.
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's what my mom told me.
Speaker 6: But my mom also told me that I was like
Speaker 6: roasting him about how he couldn't get the.
Speaker 4: Shovel in the ground while he was fixing my.
Speaker 1: Nose because you were so high on coke.
Speaker 4: Yes, wow, And but he was laughing about it. My
Speaker 4: mom said, he wasn't upset.
Speaker 3: Well, he did give you coke, so yeah, I think
Speaker 3: it was a form of cocaine.
Speaker 4: Oh, I don't know if that makes sense. It was
Speaker 4: unless it drogged though.
Speaker 3: I feel like if you call it coke, that means
Speaker 3: you snorted it off of a rolling Stones mirror right
Speaker 3: in his like back room.
Speaker 4: Rolling stones mirror, like the kind you went at the fair.
Speaker 3: Yeah, exactly, wooden frame, yeah you had that.
Speaker 1: Or the heavy metal.
Speaker 6: Logo, oh god, everywhere that heavy metal logo was everywhere.
Speaker 4: And then I finally watched the movie and it really
Speaker 4: didn't hold on. No, it just isn't all it was
Speaker 4: cracked up to be.
Speaker 1: Well, it's a cult classic.
Speaker 3: I worked at a movie theater in Sacramento and I
Speaker 3: wore a little red vest.
Speaker 1: We all did.
Speaker 4: And this was when you were a shriner.
Speaker 3: This kind of this is when I was like a
Speaker 3: freshman in college, still acting like I was going to college.
Speaker 3: And it was a movie theater behind a motel, so
Speaker 3: it's real, like, not a lot of foot traffic, very
Speaker 3: odd placed odd people that came there.
Speaker 1: And on the week ends they would.
Speaker 3: Show at midnight either Quadraphenia, Rocky Horror, heavy metal, and.
Speaker 1: What was the fourth cult.
Speaker 4: Classes, Pink Floyd's The Wall.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 6: Maybe, I imagine people going to those movies were just
Speaker 6: passing time before they retired to the motel, and a
Speaker 6: lot of them were in relationships not recognized.
Speaker 3: By the lord or their spouses at home or the
Speaker 3: state of California.
Speaker 4: Yep, I think you're right. I'm talking about cheaters.
Speaker 1: That's right.
Speaker 3: I think we had an episode of cheaters taking place
Speaker 3: in our lobby.
Speaker 4: The most uncomfortable show I've ever watched.
Speaker 3: Did show for children raised by alcoholics who crave chaos?
Speaker 6: Yes, oh, just the it's Jerry Springer, but outdoors Jerry
Speaker 6: Springer by the lake. Pardon me, sir, I'm here with
Speaker 6: your wife. Can you explain what you're doing? Watching Quadrafina
Speaker 6: with your but I but I and that guy got
Speaker 6: punched so much.
Speaker 4: The host of that show.
Speaker 1: Yeah, he must have liked that.
Speaker 4: He I think it is.
Speaker 6: He's like a ball in the mouth in the in
Speaker 6: the old bedroom type of a guy.
Speaker 1: She's that guy for such.
Speaker 4: He's part of the job.
Speaker 1: I love eighties dirty guy.
Speaker 7: Yeah.
Speaker 4: I don't remember his name.
Speaker 6: Chrint, the Chris Hansen of marriage you like to expose people?
Speaker 4: Was it Mark Summers? No doubled there?
Speaker 6: Have you ever seen the Mark Summers uh and Bert
Speaker 6: Reynolds on a talk.
Speaker 4: Show clip where he tries to say.
Speaker 6: Something to Burt Reynolds and Bert Reynolds just takes his
Speaker 6: drink and splashes it in his face.
Speaker 4: Oh shit, it's very intense.
Speaker 1: Does Burt Reynolds hate him?
Speaker 4: Yes? And I think it went on for a long time, like.
Speaker 3: Uh, it was just like you're not cool and.
Speaker 1: I'm don't talk to me? Or was they had beef?
Speaker 6: I think that it was what Mark Summers said, and
Speaker 6: I understand wanting to throw a drink in his face.
Speaker 6: He just overstepped like who are you? And he was
Speaker 6: on there promoting a kid's game show. It was very
Speaker 6: strange of him to get in Burt Reynolds's face.
Speaker 4: Yeah, we're talking about the bandit man, you guys, a legend.
Speaker 6: And good his good friend made those spices clawback. Last episode,
Speaker 6: Oh god.
Speaker 1: Deep Paul pr Dome cut.
Speaker 4: Yes.
Speaker 3: You know what show I really loved and I really
Speaker 3: miss and I think they should bring back is the
Speaker 3: show Blind Date where they had the little bubbles pop
Speaker 3: up to like talk shit on the people that were
Speaker 3: going on the date. Yeah, as you watch, it was
Speaker 3: talk about uncomfortable sometimes when they weren't on a good date.
Speaker 1: It was crazy bad.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's I mean that was the beginning.
Speaker 6: Now there's entire seasons of shows on Netflix, like do
Speaker 6: you want to watch these awkward people have a forced
Speaker 6: love life in front of cameras?
Speaker 1: Normally you do?
Speaker 4: Tell me nervous, I do not want to watch it, except.
Speaker 1: For have you watched Love on the Spectrum, which.
Speaker 6: Is I was just going to say, the only one,
Speaker 6: but even that I get uncomfortable.
Speaker 4: Well, it is very vulnerable, but it is so sweet.
Speaker 3: They are so sweet and also so simple about things.
Speaker 4: I was wondering if perhaps and I don't mean to
Speaker 4: be crafts, but may I hold your hand?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 4: And then they're holding heads and then the girl goes,
Speaker 4: I guess I like this. Then moments like that, It's great.
Speaker 4: It's the best.
Speaker 3: Also, there was one where and this was like I've
Speaker 3: never related to another human being more these It's the
Speaker 3: guy that they were kind of following.
Speaker 4: Oh here's a baby, and he thank you.
Speaker 1: That is very important. Yes, and he yeap.
Speaker 4: That was straight out of a driver's ad video.
Speaker 3: Yeah for real, because I'm like, I need to tell
Speaker 3: my story that baby can go to hell.
Speaker 4: Look a red bouncing ball and a child from the seventies.
Speaker 1: Don't care. I must tell my anecdote and not pay attention.
Speaker 4: Oh.
Speaker 3: So point being the guy that they were following, who's
Speaker 3: who was super Everyone loved him. He was kind of
Speaker 3: like the star of the show, very intense. And he
Speaker 3: goes out on a dinner date with this girl and
Speaker 3: he's super like, got all these plans and he's telling
Speaker 3: his mom he's going to do this and say this
Speaker 3: and all this stuff.
Speaker 1: And they go on the date, they sit down.
Speaker 3: He's very like, you know, bewildered, Like it's just they're
Speaker 3: acting out everybody being on a first day and all
Speaker 3: the kind of weird feelings you have and then and
Speaker 3: he's doing really well and like asking all these questions
Speaker 3: and all this stuff, and then at one point she goes,
Speaker 3: I have to and then she just gets open leaves
Speaker 3: and it's like she just the intensity, like she just
Speaker 3: kind of couldn't take the pressure right. And it's the
Speaker 3: most relatable, like it's you've wanted to do it a
Speaker 3: million times in your life, but she just does it right,
Speaker 3: and it is It was one of my favorite things
Speaker 3: I've ever seen.
Speaker 1: But she was just like Okay, bye, gotta go.
Speaker 6: And what I'm learning from that show, oftentimes people on
Speaker 6: the spectrum there, it's pretty hard to hurt feelings anyway.
Speaker 6: It's probably like okay, good, I kind of want to
Speaker 6: go too, or I do now, like they're I don't.
Speaker 6: That's what I like about watching that show, as people
Speaker 6: are just inherently kind.
Speaker 4: Yeah they aren't.
Speaker 3: There's no anger, no, no, They're very understanding and kind
Speaker 3: of like because also they're getting really good help and
Speaker 3: training in their dating coach, right, Like they have dating
Speaker 3: coaches that are like, well, wouldn't you want to be
Speaker 3: asked a question?
Speaker 1: And they're like, oh, I get it. That's yeah, that
Speaker 1: makes sense.
Speaker 3: Like it's very it's data boiled down to its simplest parts,
Speaker 3: and then being like, oh, yeah, this isn't this doesn't work,
Speaker 3: or it does.
Speaker 4: Right, we could all use those coaches.
Speaker 3: For real, yeah, or the right to just get up
Speaker 3: and leave with no explanation and a funny look on
Speaker 3: your face.
Speaker 4: We all want to do that. And then I dive
Speaker 4: out of the car right now. No, no, don't be crazy,
Speaker 4: I'm not. I refree, Well I was, but I'll stop.
Speaker 6: I love every every time we come out this way,
Speaker 6: or or when I've come out this way to do
Speaker 6: stand up.
Speaker 4: I've done some shows out here.
Speaker 1: I've come out here too.
Speaker 7: The I've come out.
Speaker 4: Here a lot.
Speaker 1: I've come out her a couple of times.
Speaker 4: I was here yesterday.
Speaker 6: Anyway, those those mountains, I always forget we're surrounded by
Speaker 6: mountains here.
Speaker 4: Look at that thing.
Speaker 6: Yes, that is one hell of a rocket straight out
Speaker 6: of the Prudential logo.
Speaker 1: It's great looking.
Speaker 3: I have friends who live kind of like the No
Speaker 3: brag at the base of the mountain, and then their
Speaker 3: view is the mountain behind that mountain.
Speaker 4: Stop bragging that you're friends with mountains.
Speaker 1: I have to tell you.
Speaker 4: People that are currently mending fences.
Speaker 1: My friend Grizzly Adams lives right there.
Speaker 4: So good with geese.
Speaker 3: Surprisingly, he loves geese and he understands them.
Speaker 6: This dog in the back of this car up here
Speaker 6: that does look like a trooper's cruiser looks like a
Speaker 6: retired eighties guard dog. Yeah, not a Doberman pincher. Those
Speaker 6: came a little later. But this dog German shepherd. Yes, yeah,
Speaker 6: thank you, you're welcome. That is a German shepherd. You
Speaker 6: don't see the mountain the wild.
Speaker 1: I'm good with celebrity names. I always have been.
Speaker 4: German German shepherd. Pleased to meet you.
Speaker 3: He's being driven. What's the word I'm looking for? Show around?
Speaker 4: Yes, that's a retired actor from Canine Coop.
Speaker 6: Well, now it seems like I'm making it up because
Speaker 6: the dog duck down thinks we're paparazzi.
Speaker 1: That dog is dating Lady GEGAA.
Speaker 4: Oh, they're gone now.
Speaker 6: I always assume things about someone's personality when they drive
Speaker 6: the same issue of car as a police Yeah, well.
Speaker 1: Yeah, is this cosplay? Why would you buy that car?
Speaker 6: Are you about to make a citizen's arrest? You have
Speaker 6: the car, you have the dog, but you're wearing.
Speaker 1: A cart again, are you seventy eight years old? Right?
Speaker 4: A lot of times it's just an oldie. Yep, let's
Speaker 4: follow him. We are the paparazzi.
Speaker 3: You're not getting away that the paparazzi.
Speaker 4: Yeah, because you're following a dog.
Speaker 6: I didn't want to I didn't want to say it.
Speaker 6: I would like to write it.
Speaker 3: You said it, and then I said it like I
Speaker 3: was the one making joke.
Speaker 1: You're the one making the joke. I know.
Speaker 4: Thanks for taking the hit on my very bad pun.
Speaker 1: I enjoyed it, but I thought I thought of it.
Speaker 1: That's the sad part.
Speaker 4: Oh right, No, we do hang out a lot, I
Speaker 4: know her.
Speaker 1: That's true.
Speaker 4: Beauty. Ah, look at these beautiful little houses.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I'm more attracted now to houses that I feel
Speaker 6: like one day all a foard than I am big giant,
Speaker 6: fancy ones.
Speaker 1: These are better houses.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 3: You only are ever in two rooms usually, and then
Speaker 3: you go to the bath.
Speaker 6: My biggest fear is is living in a house where
Speaker 6: you can hear echoes.
Speaker 1: That's your biggest fear.
Speaker 4: Yes, that and snakes.
Speaker 1: Have you heard of cancer?
Speaker 7: Sorry?
Speaker 4: The biggest fear is one day living in a house
Speaker 4: of cancer.
Speaker 3: So much cancer at echoes. This is are we Meltada?
Speaker 3: I believe so this place.
Speaker 6: Is the greatest, made famous by, of course, the milk.
Speaker 4: I think that might not even be a joke.
Speaker 3: Well, it's not a joke, and I wouldn't say it's famous,
Speaker 3: would you.
Speaker 4: No, I think that's a regional milk, isn't it.
Speaker 1: Yep? Yeah, I do think it is.
Speaker 4: How about Metal Gold?
Speaker 6: Do you remember that Meadow Gold? Meadow Gold. No, that's
Speaker 6: a milk that's regional to my childhood. Every soccer team
Speaker 6: I was ever on was a Meadow Gold milk T
Speaker 6: shirt in Missoula.
Speaker 4: Yeah, in Missoula. Thank you. I know I did that
Speaker 4: talk about bouncing around?
Speaker 3: Well, no, I just like to fill in that information
Speaker 3: for the new listener.
Speaker 1: We must always think about.
Speaker 6: It, right, No, I'm reminding of remembering the time where
Speaker 6: I jumped from Texas to Montana to hear.
Speaker 4: Yes, my soccer days whereas a.
Speaker 6: Child in mont Hannah and Metal Gold it was like
Speaker 6: responsible for the I remember my soccer coaches were teenagers
Speaker 6: that chewed Copenhagen, and they were but I vividly remember
Speaker 6: how good they were with kids, and like these guys
Speaker 6: like they're they're still kind of kids themselves, but they
Speaker 6: were older and I could tell they were just they
Speaker 6: got it openly using tobacco. Was I influenced? Yes, I
Speaker 6: did chew for a while. I just remembered.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Well, I think though, if you were anywhere near the
Speaker 3: countryside as a boy between the ages of twelve.
Speaker 1: And fourteen, you kind of had to try it.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 6: I was wedged right there between the country and the
Speaker 6: foot of the hill. You were going to be pressured
Speaker 6: to get into that inevitable that you will put tobacco
Speaker 6: in your mouth, even as a joke, and it looks
Speaker 6: like you like it and immediately become addicted.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that one I didn't get because look at that chair.
Speaker 1: Should we grab that chair?
Speaker 4: Sure, I've done it before. I've found chairs and walked
Speaker 4: for miles with them just to put them on my
Speaker 4: porch and then realize I don't like the chair.
Speaker 3: But it was free because they always look good when
Speaker 3: they're sitting out by themselves on the sidewalk.
Speaker 4: How about Bubba Gump? Is that a regional port at
Speaker 4: company or a very you familiar with Bubba? There? He
Speaker 4: is not Bubba Gump. I confused my shrimp and my shitters.
Speaker 1: You're all the same.
Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, look at that friendly face he is.
Speaker 4: We have a guest today.
Speaker 6: You might know him from clubs and colleges across the country.
Speaker 6: He's a writer, he's an actor, he's a comedian. He's
Speaker 6: our friend.
Speaker 4: Put your ears together for Chris Garcia. Glarcia, it's good
Speaker 4: to see you.
Speaker 7: Good to see you too.
Speaker 1: Really enjoying your neighborhood.
Speaker 7: Are you really do you come out here often?
Speaker 6: I was just bragging about how there's a little theater
Speaker 6: here that has something to.
Speaker 4: Do with Bud Diaz and I did a.
Speaker 6: Show at it recently. We were on the main street
Speaker 6: and I think it was on that street.
Speaker 7: Oh yeah, that little theater.
Speaker 2: Yeah, PDA, it's called right, it's like and only if
Speaker 2: it's like fifteen people.
Speaker 6: But you can be publicly affectionate, Yeah you can't. And
Speaker 6: we are in a driver's head video. Now there's clones
Speaker 6: laid out.
Speaker 7: Yeah, it's wild.
Speaker 2: There's no sidewalks, there's people drive by the rules of
Speaker 2: their home countries. Yeah, and yeah, Chiwawa just stole my
Speaker 2: catalytic conversion.
Speaker 7: It's really wild. But Maria Bamford lives nearby, which.
Speaker 2: Is fun, and we do the there's a little open
Speaker 2: mic at that at the little ramshackle theater down the street,
Speaker 2: and we go there every Monday in the valley.
Speaker 7: Maybe only like six.
Speaker 2: Or seven other comedians, maybe ten comedians go and we
Speaker 2: just work out her stuff there.
Speaker 1: That's great.
Speaker 4: I love it.
Speaker 6: That's something I've always noticed and loved about Maria is
Speaker 6: she is not above any stage. All the work she's
Speaker 6: done and now good she's been for so long, I
Speaker 6: am not surprised when I see her at a coffee
Speaker 6: shop store and.
Speaker 2: She really loves it, and she comes out every Monday.
Speaker 2: Sometimes she'll do shows at eight o'clock in the morning.
Speaker 2: She'll like put on from two shows.
Speaker 1: And lately she's.
Speaker 2: Been doing crowd work and paying the people that she
Speaker 2: interacts with. You're kidding, She'll get Yeah, she did it Monday,
Speaker 2: she did crowd work. She asked someone a question that
Speaker 2: she had it up twenty dollars for their service.
Speaker 7: It was awesome.
Speaker 2: She's sucking great and it speaks to the cookie spirit
Speaker 2: of our little town.
Speaker 7: Yeah, just a cookie little places.
Speaker 4: I love it here.
Speaker 6: And how often do you just stare at that mountain
Speaker 6: and you're like, oh, all.
Speaker 7: The time, there's bears up there. It's so funny.
Speaker 4: There's bears and Ms thirteen graffiti.
Speaker 7: Really, it's funny.
Speaker 4: It's like a little bit of anything, do you Jackson.
Speaker 1: Are they the ones that are against each other?
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like the blood and the crips of our
Speaker 2: neighborhood is the Grizzlies and the Salvatorians.
Speaker 1: Wow.
Speaker 4: And seriously there's gangs and then they're hills.
Speaker 7: No, No, it's okay, it's not that yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but there's there is graffiti on it on trees
Speaker 2: and rock sure.
Speaker 6: Yeah, sure everyone everyone likes to go hiking, even machete
Speaker 6: wielding tough guys.
Speaker 4: Wow. And have you seen bears?
Speaker 7: Uh No, there's a lot of coyotes.
Speaker 4: Sure, seen. I've heard of.
Speaker 2: There is a bear down by my daughter's preschool, like a.
Speaker 7: Month ago or something during the day.
Speaker 2: Wow. But more up like, if you live up this block,
Speaker 2: you have to have a bare box for your trash.
Speaker 2: So they're actually they're like out and around right in
Speaker 2: the foothills here.
Speaker 7: There's a museum up here.
Speaker 2: That is a bunny museum and it just has like
Speaker 2: all sorts of dilapidated rabbits and then you can rint
Speaker 2: an electric bike there too. It really feels like northern California,
Speaker 2: like a sister city to some Oakland or Santa ROSA
Speaker 2: type of my.
Speaker 4: Favorite is multitasking businesses.
Speaker 3: Get it done, Get her done. That is so great, Chris,
Speaker 3: I wanted to get coffee. Would you be opposed to
Speaker 3: us going to the McDonald's stride through to get a
Speaker 3: McCafe of some kind?
Speaker 2: Oh that sounds great. Okay, Yeah, that sounds awesome. It's
Speaker 2: a real fun McDonald's.
Speaker 4: Yeah, think about what you want.
Speaker 2: Yeah, well you should you coffee to be great, ice colored.
Speaker 2: I think those are the two options at that McCafe.
Speaker 6: Have you been doing I feel like I personally haven't
Speaker 6: been doing stand up as much as I used to
Speaker 6: or enjoy, But.
Speaker 4: I'm okay with that. Also, how have you been doing
Speaker 4: stand up a lot?
Speaker 7: You know? I hadn't, you know. I think I stopped
Speaker 7: in like November or something.
Speaker 2: It just gets too cozy around the holidays, sure, and
Speaker 2: too nice.
Speaker 7: I'm like, I don't want.
Speaker 1: To go outside or anything.
Speaker 2: But you know, actually seeing Maria out on a Monday
Speaker 2: night at a nine o'clock Mike, I was like, what
Speaker 2: am I doing?
Speaker 4: Do I write this? And I do?
Speaker 2: And so that started getting me out on Mondays, and
Speaker 2: then that just made me want to go out more.
Speaker 2: So in the last month or so, I've really been
Speaker 2: out there again. And at first, you know, it's so scary.
Speaker 2: It feels like you've never done it in your whole life, right,
Speaker 2: what are you even doing anymore?
Speaker 7: And then you have one good set and you're a
Speaker 7: genius from the future, and.
Speaker 2: Then it again and you a shit yeah and that ride.
Speaker 6: Yeah, That's the one thing I love about stand up
Speaker 6: is a time travel.
Speaker 3: The last set I did, and I think this is
Speaker 3: probably why it's the last set I did, because it
Speaker 3: was pre COVID obviously, but it was so bad and
Speaker 3: I had to follow James Fritz and I was like, oh,
Speaker 3: what the fuck am I doing? It was like one
Speaker 3: of those what am I doing with my life?
Speaker 1: Sets?
Speaker 3: And then COVID hit and then I was like, well,
Speaker 3: I'm not going to address that ever again. But it
Speaker 3: was really it's I think I can't leave that. I
Speaker 3: can't let that be my last set. You can't because
Speaker 3: it was so bad.
Speaker 4: It wasn't your last set. I was your most recent.
Speaker 1: Most recent, most painful.
Speaker 2: I remember I forgot got his name, but this guy
Speaker 2: killed before me on my own show, and we had
Speaker 2: to show a little joy called the Business, and he
Speaker 2: killed it so hard and I just couldn't follow him.
Speaker 2: I felt like I was following fucking Jimmy with like
Speaker 2: a kazoo or like a kid xylophone or something, and
Speaker 2: I still try to be like, oh, yeah, well check
Speaker 2: out this kazoo or whatever. And I just ate it
Speaker 2: so hard on my own show that I walked home,
Speaker 2: Oh to lot.
Speaker 4: Like a forty five minute walk of shame.
Speaker 1: Did you do it like right after your set? Like
Speaker 1: you just left?
Speaker 7: Yeah? I just laughed like I was walking into the horizon.
Speaker 4: Wow, And you left your car there? Or had I had?
Speaker 4: That's where we go.
Speaker 1: You you had not driven?
Speaker 7: No, I had not driven.
Speaker 3: Okay, that would be super dramatic if you just walked
Speaker 3: like you were in a daze.
Speaker 1: Yeah, forgot you drove.
Speaker 7: Then I don't walk back. That'd be so sad.
Speaker 1: And just then everyone's gathering around in the parking lot. Yeah,
Speaker 1: make fun of you.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 7: Do you know how to get to make tons?
Speaker 2: Well?
Speaker 1: I put it, Oh you got it. I put in that.
Speaker 2: It seems like, oh yeah, that's right, so that it'll
Speaker 2: work right somehow, did not see the giant TV in
Speaker 2: front of you.
Speaker 6: I miss that stage where you had your show. Yeah
Speaker 6: that that bar is now a a hotspot. There's a
Speaker 6: line out front, there's a velvet rope.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it seems to have turned into some sort of
Speaker 2: Mexico City cocaine bar. It used to be a Los
Speaker 2: Angeles City cocaine bar.
Speaker 6: No, it's where I started and peaked and have resigned
Speaker 6: in my in my billiard's career.
Speaker 4: Also just because I can't it's so packed. And then
Speaker 4: do they still have it in there?
Speaker 6: The pool table is in there, but I just you know,
Speaker 6: I just don't touch the stuff anymore.
Speaker 4: And when I say I mean cocaine, mean the cocaine.
Speaker 1: They make you do it as you playpool. That's part
Speaker 1: of it.
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's the reason I was sinking so many balls.
Speaker 1: Look at this.
Speaker 4: Yes, this whole day has been a driver's ad video.
Speaker 1: Yeah for real, Like you're missus and.
Speaker 7: It's a real frogger situation.
Speaker 4: It's really and it's real.
Speaker 2: And now that I have a kid, you know, like
Speaker 2: I've I get so mad, like even when she's not
Speaker 2: in the.
Speaker 7: Car, just because I have a family, and I don't know,
Speaker 7: I'm not.
Speaker 1: I haven't.
Speaker 2: I've turned almost Republican except for how I vote or
Speaker 2: think or anything just in terms of my road range.
Speaker 4: And I still don't have a gun, but I just get.
Speaker 2: I still get really mad, and I just like I
Speaker 2: was driving, and it adds up because I'm like, jeez.
Speaker 4: You didn't you ran that stop or whatever.
Speaker 2: I was actually let maybe like a month and a
Speaker 2: half ago, I was driving home from Torrance where my
Speaker 2: mom lives, with my daughter in the back of the car,
Speaker 2: and uh, you know, it's kind of crazy traffic, and
Speaker 2: I'm on the one ten.
Speaker 7: Which is the crazy craziest it's.
Speaker 2: Like Mario Kart for people that don't have insurance, like
Speaker 2: driving crazy and this car and I see like the
Speaker 2: sea of red brake lights coming up, and so I
Speaker 2: start slowing down because traffic is slowing down. And the
Speaker 2: guy behind me is in one of those Rivians.
Speaker 4: Electric fancy truck.
Speaker 7: Yeah, like a fancy truck.
Speaker 1: A new type of car.
Speaker 7: Yeah, And he's just not stopping and he's right behind me.
Speaker 4: Uh, and so I pull off.
Speaker 2: I'm on the right, I'm in the right lane, and
Speaker 2: I pull off to the shoulder or whatever so he
Speaker 2: doesn't hit me. Right and he's he eventually slams his
Speaker 2: brakes and he almost hits.
Speaker 4: The car that was in front of me, So you
Speaker 4: would have gotten I would.
Speaker 2: Have gotten hit with my daughter in him back and uh,
Speaker 2: I like roll down my window and I'm like farous.
Speaker 2: I'm like furious, and I'm seeing red and I'm like
Speaker 2: trying to get back onto the freeway and.
Speaker 7: He's not letting me. Oh is this like looking at
Speaker 7: his phone or something, and he just doesn't let me.
Speaker 2: And I have I have a Lacroix that's like I
Speaker 2: haven't that was just dead like I took two SIPs
Speaker 2: like two weeks ago. I like where this is going
Speaker 2: and I'm just like I'm holding it in my hand
Speaker 2: and I just chucked it at his car. I threw
Speaker 2: it at his car like sideways, like a quarterback that
Speaker 2: was about and I just like chucked it at his
Speaker 2: car and it hit his car and there was a
Speaker 2: huge thud, and he like looked up and I was
Speaker 2: just like like yelling and stuff.
Speaker 7: And then and then he like scampered it. He like
Speaker 7: drove away.
Speaker 4: I love it. He was scared of me.
Speaker 7: I mean it was really dumb of me. Like I
Speaker 7: love my daughter was in the back that did not
Speaker 7: feel good. And then who knows, I mean this guy did.
Speaker 4: Did she start crying? You got upset?
Speaker 2: No, she seemed kind of thrilled a little bit, which
Speaker 2: was kind of scary for me because I was like, oh, nice,
Speaker 2: but I get really I get really mad in traffic
Speaker 2: now and I don't. And now I turned around her
Speaker 2: car seat. She's like outgrown her car seat, so she
Speaker 2: has to like face forward now, And now I'm really
Speaker 2: scared that she gets to see everything.
Speaker 3: Knows, whether it's technical stupidity or it's just that weird
Speaker 3: every man for himself. Fuck it, I don't care. I'm
Speaker 3: not gonna I'm gonna cut you off before I yield.
Speaker 7: No one will yield anymore, No one yields at all.
Speaker 2: And it really I just can't. I'm gonna go on
Speaker 2: full like falling down.
Speaker 1: Because people have guns and want to show them off.
Speaker 4: I know that is that's true. I really have to
Speaker 4: cool it.
Speaker 7: I really have to cool it for Sunny's sake. Please,
Speaker 7: for Sonny's sake, you're right.
Speaker 6: Or catch them off guard and just go, wow, that's
Speaker 6: a really nice gun. Where'd you get it? Because that's
Speaker 6: kind of what they.
Speaker 2: Want the other thing that I, oh my god, this
Speaker 2: is really bad. But instead of flipping people off if
Speaker 2: they start yelling at me, which has happened before. I
Speaker 2: don't feel like I instigate any thing. But people just
Speaker 2: yeall have.
Speaker 4: Gone like this.
Speaker 7: I like look at him and I go, you know,
Speaker 7: you wipe my tears.
Speaker 6: You do the cry baby baby face. That is bo
Speaker 6: That'll make do that for a while.
Speaker 4: And me stop.
Speaker 7: And now I just do the smile.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, that is yeah. It just all feels bad.
Speaker 1: It does.
Speaker 4: Just do they kind and smile.
Speaker 2: During the podcast near car accidents, No.
Speaker 6: No, we I think the closest famously we ever got
Speaker 6: to taking a comedian out of the scene was Eddie
Speaker 6: Pepatone I think.
Speaker 4: But there was a close but it was someone else.
Speaker 4: It wasn't us. Karen's a great ride.
Speaker 1: Uh well. Also I drive really slowly so just to
Speaker 1: make sure.
Speaker 3: But there was also the guy that tried to hit
Speaker 3: like he I think he thought I cut him off,
Speaker 3: so he tried to hit the front of the car
Speaker 3: with a bike lock.
Speaker 4: I was hackling. I'm like, yeah, yeah, we know you're
Speaker 4: on a bike.
Speaker 1: It was super crazy.
Speaker 6: He didn't understand I was being funny on a podcast.
Speaker 6: That's so it was a miscommunication and he not only.
Speaker 4: As he swung the.
Speaker 6: Lock at the car, he just darted into an intersection.
Speaker 4: Were all stopped at a red light.
Speaker 6: We almost watched him take his own life in anger
Speaker 6: towards in a ridge. Yeah, and and yeah, so we've
Speaker 6: seen things like that, but no, I don't think. I'm
Speaker 6: almost certain we will never be in a fender bender?
Speaker 4: Did you decide what you wanted?
Speaker 3: I know what I'm I'm going to get a like
Speaker 3: a mocha or something like a latte with chocolate or something.
Speaker 1: Could I get a do you still have.
Speaker 3: Like the Can I get a latte?
Speaker 1: Are you still making those now?
Speaker 3: Just like a hot coffee with milk and flavor in it?
Speaker 3: If you haven't, Oh, I was gonna do. Can I
Speaker 3: just do a small latte? If you still serve those
Speaker 3: a vanilla?
Speaker 4: I'll get a small iced coffee.
Speaker 1: And can we get a small iced coffee?
Speaker 4: Do you want a flavor at a little bit of caramel?
Speaker 1: Caramel?
Speaker 7: Please, Chris, I'm gonna get that same exactly.
Speaker 1: Can we get two of those? And on the leaves?
Speaker 1: And can I also get a small sprite? And that's
Speaker 1: it those four drinks. Thank you. She was incredibly.
Speaker 3: Patient, She really was, because I was doing that. This
Speaker 3: is the thing I do, and I do it all
Speaker 3: a fucking time, especially if I'm on the phone. I
Speaker 3: start to anticipate how they're going to misinterpret me, and
Speaker 3: then I say the thing that I was saying of
Speaker 3: I don't even know if you make these anymore? And
Speaker 3: she then I was just blabbering, and she's like, do
Speaker 3: you want coffee with milk in it?
Speaker 2: Like?
Speaker 4: What do you want? I want to talk about McDonald's
Speaker 4: menu history.
Speaker 3: I don't want to assume that you still are making
Speaker 3: lattes if you're not, because God forbid.
Speaker 1: It's like I can't ask a question.
Speaker 3: I'm just weirdly phrasing my thing in a way that
Speaker 3: makes it the least understandable. I used to do it,
Speaker 3: like trying to get like customer service people where they'd
Speaker 3: be like, and my voice woul always go up really high.
Speaker 3: It's like I was wondering if and it's like, no
Speaker 3: one needs any backstory.
Speaker 1: Just pick a thing and say it's.
Speaker 4: Say say what it is.
Speaker 7: It was a picture of it on the screen, Gary.
Speaker 3: No, but I want I kind of wanted to mocha,
Speaker 3: and I knew if I introduced that, like a totally
Speaker 3: different thing, that would be kind of wild because that
Speaker 3: wasn't on the menu.
Speaker 4: I'd like to order something, but I'd also like to
Speaker 4: tell you some of my fears.
Speaker 3: I certainly don't want to be so uncute, is to
Speaker 3: try to order something from the miccafe if you have
Speaker 3: closed it down.
Speaker 1: That's my worst That's the worst thing I could do.
Speaker 2: My voice goes up to I still do it anytime
Speaker 2: I order Ranch dressing or something.
Speaker 7: I i'd have a sign a ranch too.
Speaker 1: He don't hurt me.
Speaker 6: Do you still have those paper crowns?
Speaker 4: Oh no, well you're offended.
Speaker 1: Can I have that walet?
Speaker 6: They just get a wallet they can put over your shoulder,
Speaker 6: just the wallet.
Speaker 4: Oh oh, I thought you were making a purse joke.
Speaker 7: Carrying Your hair looks great, by the way, Chris, thank you.
Speaker 1: That is really nice for you to say. I got
Speaker 1: this haircut.
Speaker 3: And I could have sworn when I said I wanted
Speaker 3: a bob, I was like, down here under the chin
Speaker 3: with it. But she gave me the very trendy like
Speaker 3: this is the bob that all the twenty five year olds.
Speaker 1: Are getting, where I.
Speaker 3: Was like, don't do that, it's like easy, But then
Speaker 3: I think it turned out good.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Plus, that Bob is the Bob that I think we
Speaker 2: had when it was first.
Speaker 4: Bobbed or whatever, you know what I mean. Yes, that's
Speaker 4: our Bob.
Speaker 1: This was the night. This is Karen in the nineties
Speaker 1: for sure.
Speaker 4: Yes, the original Bob. I was unsure of pulling.
Speaker 2: Like I went to my mom's house and I found
Speaker 2: a bunch of old stuff. I was just like going
Speaker 2: through boxes and stuff and a pair of old Dickeys,
Speaker 2: and I was like, it's time to dusty soft.
Speaker 7: And I was like, am I gonna look like a
Speaker 7: like an idiot wearing these dickies?
Speaker 6: And no, Dickies are back and they're forever, They're classic,
Speaker 6: and now they come stretchy, yeah, which was really weird. Yeah,
Speaker 6: because that's one thing we didn't like about a Dicky
Speaker 6: is that it was very, very firm and starched.
Speaker 1: Ye had at least fifty times.
Speaker 4: Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 6: Ever since they started having a skateboarding team, they put
Speaker 6: Lykra in that fabric and now they're like Chuck Norris
Speaker 6: kick jeans.
Speaker 7: Chris, did you wear Jenko's back in the day. Jenko's guy.
Speaker 6: No, Jenko's were, Uh, Jenkos were more for inline skaters.
Speaker 4: I think it was just like a brand thing.
Speaker 6: It's very hard to break into if you aren't actually
Speaker 6: a skateboard company. To break into the into skateboarding. The
Speaker 6: only people that did it were Supreme. But somehow, without
Speaker 6: being a skate company, they're just like, we're going to
Speaker 6: dictate what skateboarders wear.
Speaker 4: I don't know how that worked, but yeah.
Speaker 6: Jenko, although I have seen him out there, Jenco's back
Speaker 6: and now I kind of want them as much as
Speaker 6: I want a pair of cross colors.
Speaker 7: Oh my gosh, I had cross colors.
Speaker 4: I had.
Speaker 7: I have to find this picture.
Speaker 2: I wore bright yellow cross color overall shorts with a
Speaker 2: Malcolm X hat shirt when I was a freshman in.
Speaker 4: High School's great.
Speaker 7: I really thought I was the hardest gangster that ever.
Speaker 4: That's so great.
Speaker 2: I was going through and I was a tagger, but
Speaker 2: I had like I looked like I was a fly
Speaker 2: girl and living colored.
Speaker 4: That's great.
Speaker 6: I would have been your friend immediately with my giant
Speaker 6: mustard colored pants.
Speaker 4: Oh that's great.
Speaker 3: Thank you, there's yours, Thank you, thank you very much.
Speaker 4: Oh look at that. It says drinking of you?
Speaker 7: Thank you?
Speaker 1: Are we in high school?
Speaker 2: I don't like it talking about big pants and drilling
Speaker 2: around drink and McDonald's.
Speaker 3: Wait, if you guys had to choose, we'll go around
Speaker 3: the car Ben Davis or Dickies.
Speaker 4: Oh for me, it's dickies all day.
Speaker 6: Okay, But when it comes to a work shirt with
Speaker 6: those train engineer denim stripes Ben Davis for the top, okay, yeah,
Speaker 6: but Geky's bottoms.
Speaker 2: I was the same, Dickies on the bottom. I never had,
Speaker 2: even though I like the snaps. I think they had
Speaker 2: like a button snap that Ben Davis. But I just
Speaker 2: always had dickies. I think they were easier to find
Speaker 2: or something. But then the pin stripe, the pin stripe
Speaker 2: Bent Davis shirt is just a classic.
Speaker 6: It is have you taken a sip yet, Chris of
Speaker 6: your coffee?
Speaker 1: Yes?
Speaker 4: It is a melted ice cream? Is wild? I am
Speaker 4: not sure. Let's go back and ask if we were
Speaker 4: a dairy queen. Because my.
Speaker 9: Shoulder tattoo is literally moving. It is moving. That is insane.
Speaker 9: My teeth hurt. I've never even I brag about this.
Speaker 9: A lot have had a cavity, but I.
Speaker 6: Now have all my molars holes in them.
Speaker 4: And I'm gonna take another sip because.
Speaker 2: It almost is like a Vietnamese ice coffee butt somehow.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm not mad at it.
Speaker 6: I just have to be surprised by this kind of
Speaker 6: sweetness and then I understand chasing it.
Speaker 7: It's gonna have a couple of little more.
Speaker 1: It is pretty.
Speaker 3: Mine smells like maple syrup, but it's a vanilla lae.
Speaker 1: It was good.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I've I don't even know. This is an unrelatable
Speaker 6: amount of sweets. Really, I grew up in a house
Speaker 6: of carab chips.
Speaker 2: And.
Speaker 1: Oh boy, we're just going crazy.
Speaker 4: But I'm already a quarter done. I get it. I mean,
Speaker 4: I get it. Yeah, I get it.
Speaker 1: Everyone delicious.
Speaker 4: My tooth is officially sweet.
Speaker 6: I Chris stopped drinking recently. I don't know where you
Speaker 6: stand on the alcohol intake, but I like an old
Speaker 6: Mark Maron joke. I now crave candy and sweet and
Speaker 6: I never was a.
Speaker 4: Sweet tooth before.
Speaker 7: Oh, Congratula, When did you stop? Congratulations?
Speaker 6: Oh it's nine months nice.
Speaker 4: I stopped on years.
Speaker 7: Year's Eve.
Speaker 1: I stopped of this year.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Well yeah, well, I was in New York with
Speaker 2: friends and down I went with the family to hang
Speaker 2: out with a high school friend and his family and
Speaker 2: it's really sweet. And we went out to see this
Speaker 2: grateful dead cover band and the only way I can
Speaker 2: really get through it was to really drink so much.
Speaker 2: Like I was like, this is and it's like not
Speaker 2: even like here, It's like upstate New York level white people, right,
Speaker 2: It's like I can't I can't see you guys have.
Speaker 4: So much goofy joy all in one boy. And it
Speaker 4: did not feel good. Yeah, just thinking about being there is.
Speaker 2: And I got wasted, and I will I woke up
Speaker 2: feeling so bad the next morning.
Speaker 3: Were there any stories about bad behavior or just physically bad.
Speaker 1: Just physically bad.
Speaker 2: I mean, we were goofy and stuff that night. And
Speaker 2: the worst thing I did was eat an entire brain
Speaker 2: taco and no brain burrito brito with brains in it
Speaker 2: brain which it seems like a lot.
Speaker 4: Of brains brains of abe just.
Speaker 7: A living monkey, a living of a living monkey.
Speaker 2: And it just it just made me feel bad the
Speaker 2: next morning. But the next morning, I was like, I
Speaker 2: never want to feel like this again. And I think
Speaker 2: it turned out it turned out to be COVID, you know,
Speaker 2: And I got I got COVID while I was there.
Speaker 2: I woke up with COVID. But still I was like,
Speaker 2: I don't know if I'm gonna do this. This might
Speaker 2: be a graceful exit.
Speaker 6: Yeah, like not necessarily a rock bottom situation where it's
Speaker 6: something you have a story to tell.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but yeah, there's been plenty of close calls like that. Right,
Speaker 2: I'm like, maybe I could just use this as a
Speaker 2: good excuse have cold for a week and then not drinking. Right,
Speaker 2: I have been eating a lot of Trader Joe's Swedish swimmers.
Speaker 1: Right, so good.
Speaker 4: It starts with the gummy candies. That's what got me.
Speaker 6: I'm like, sure, off some worms and bears and now
Speaker 6: I'm just officially craving. I mean it actually it started
Speaker 6: for me with mangoes, dried mangoes and.
Speaker 3: The and mangos are the fruit with like the most
Speaker 3: sugar in them. So it makes sense that you went
Speaker 3: to those first version.
Speaker 4: I still go to them.
Speaker 6: But yeah, it's so good. I had a pretty uneventful exit. Also,
Speaker 6: when a month before that I've fell in my shower
Speaker 6: and ripped down the curtain and hit my head, that
Speaker 6: you would think day after that I would, but no,
Speaker 6: I just wanted to make some dietary changes, but in
Speaker 6: retrospect that that showerfall maybe had something.
Speaker 4: To do with it.
Speaker 7: How do you feel now?
Speaker 6: I feel great. My brain works a little better, a
Speaker 6: little better.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm feeling pretty good, even though it's only been
Speaker 2: like a month or something. But it reminds me that
Speaker 2: Kyle Kinane, I think he had like a tweet or
Speaker 2: something He's like, haven't drank in three days?
Speaker 4: Feels great.
Speaker 2: Shit, I don't want to feel good.
Speaker 6: That was That was always I was always trying when
Speaker 6: Twitter was like an art form for me, trying to
Speaker 6: come up with the perfect version of a tweet where
Speaker 6: you decide something or something happens in the middle.
Speaker 4: I don't I don't know if I'm describing what you just.
Speaker 6: Said is a perfect example that that is the tweet
Speaker 6: that I always wanted to come up with.
Speaker 4: There it is, man, this.
Speaker 2: Is I could feel like my tongue and the rest
Speaker 2: of my mouth feels like it's one in the scene.
Speaker 1: You know what I mean?
Speaker 6: Right?
Speaker 7: The sweetness of this thing, it's kind of yes, it's.
Speaker 1: The unification of the meccafe.
Speaker 6: Well, one thing I forgot to do. Uh, And it
Speaker 6: seems like such a rookie mistake is to mix it.
Speaker 6: I think I was just the first couple of drinks
Speaker 6: was the let's call it syrup? Oh, they put it
Speaker 6: there and now now it's now it's fine.
Speaker 1: They should have shook that up for you.
Speaker 3: I know I'm lifting the strong good idea, Chris, Are
Speaker 3: you watching anything that I should be watching?
Speaker 4: Yeah? Or writing on something we should be watching.
Speaker 7: Let's see, am I watching anything I'm watching?
Speaker 2: Oh?
Speaker 7: Yeah, Karen, you gotta you gotta start watching this Premier.
Speaker 4: League League football?
Speaker 2: Really, I think you will love it. I mean Chelsea
Speaker 2: versus Liverpool.
Speaker 7: Today, what a storyline?
Speaker 4: Right?
Speaker 2: I mean clop is about to retire now, clop Yeah,
Speaker 2: clop Is he just.
Speaker 7: Announced he's gonna retire.
Speaker 4: It sounds like it would be the mascot you clops out.
Speaker 7: Oh there goes Clap again.
Speaker 2: But let's see he wrote on Oh the show Minx
Speaker 2: Show season two.
Speaker 7: It came out recently.
Speaker 4: That was fun.
Speaker 7: It was a fun show.
Speaker 3: We had Oscar Montoya. He was on so delightful, like
Speaker 3: so much fun.
Speaker 7: He is so sweet and so funny. Yeah, so really
Speaker 7: fun to write for.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I bet are you? Are you guys pals now?
Speaker 2: Yeah, we're pals because you know, he is like the
Speaker 2: Latino guy in the show, and I was only Latino
Speaker 2: guy in the room.
Speaker 7: So sometimes I'd be like, whoa.
Speaker 4: Whoa, whoa, whoa whoa.
Speaker 2: Colombians don't necessarily have larger cheekbones everybody.
Speaker 8: Colombians don't have extra bones, like say, Ben, let's scale
Speaker 8: that one I have. You know, fewer bones, have less bones.
Speaker 8: They live in alter altitude, right, some of them fly,
Speaker 8: so they do have burdens, they don't necessarily have more
Speaker 8: of them.
Speaker 7: So there's some stuff like that.
Speaker 3: But just dispelling all of the missing rumors in Hollywood
Speaker 3: about Colombia getting it taken care of I did.
Speaker 2: I did manage to put like a fun inside joke
Speaker 2: that I did not tell anyone else about that. There's
Speaker 2: like a I think they go out to eat at
Speaker 2: a Mexican restaurant or something or like a cantina, and.
Speaker 4: They're like, Christ, do you want to name it?
Speaker 7: And uh and so I was like sure, and I had.
Speaker 2: To pass clearances and all that stuff, so I just
Speaker 2: called it I think chat cantina, you know, and everyone.
Speaker 7: I was like, oh cool is you know?
Speaker 2: I think they just assumed it his name after a
Speaker 2: family member or something like yeah, I thinks actually someone
Speaker 2: asked that. I was like, yeah, yeah, yeah, but it's
Speaker 2: just what It's just short for chut the fuck up.
Speaker 1: I choked that.
Speaker 7: A lot of friends that I used to have like, hey,
Speaker 7: do you know chut that fuck up?
Speaker 2: And it was just inside Latino friends and I growing up,
Speaker 2: but like, oh, chat, that must be a grandma Taser.
Speaker 2: Tita's are a Filipino, right, And I was like, no,
Speaker 2: it's just short.
Speaker 4: Fuck up right across from up Dog Cafe. Yeah, that's
Speaker 4: so great. That's good.
Speaker 7: But yeah, that was fun to write for.
Speaker 2: And then oh, and there's a cartoon that's coming up
Speaker 2: that doesn't comes out in the fall, or something called
Speaker 2: the Hogy Brothers that's gonna be on fault.
Speaker 6: I read for many thirty voices on the Brothers really,
Speaker 6: oh yeah, over and over to Whea's like I want
Speaker 6: to paycheck for how many these I bought this?
Speaker 4: But it was very funny.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and then Maria Baffer turns around and gives you
Speaker 3: twenty dollars.
Speaker 6: I can never It might be riddled with uh, well
Speaker 6: known people, but it was what I read, which was
Speaker 6: a lot of it was really funny.
Speaker 4: Awesome.
Speaker 7: Thanks.
Speaker 2: You know what the funniest part is is that I
Speaker 2: think the creator guy ended up.
Speaker 4: Doing all the voices. Oh that's funny.
Speaker 2: Every time there's a new voice, and he's very funny.
Speaker 4: That makes me feel better.
Speaker 7: He's like, I'll just do it.
Speaker 4: There's a lot of coaches and football guys, right, yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's kind of like a guys It's not really
Speaker 2: a guys.
Speaker 6: Show, but I had a lot of like gruff sounding
Speaker 6: men who sounded like this like I over and over
Speaker 6: and I'm like, well, I'm just gonna use the same
Speaker 6: voice again.
Speaker 4: But yeah, that was that's so funny.
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna fold all these characters into one.
Speaker 4: Yeah. I can't wait to watch that.
Speaker 7: Yeah, it should be fun.
Speaker 2: Other than that, just watching, I'm real deep on love
Speaker 2: on the Spectrum.
Speaker 4: We were just literally just just right before we picked
Speaker 4: you up. Really yeah, awesome.
Speaker 1: What do you think?
Speaker 7: Are you all caught up? Well?
Speaker 3: No, I love it, but we're talking about like the
Speaker 3: vulnerability part that makes it like to watch, like it
Speaker 3: feels like you got to gird your loins to watch it.
Speaker 4: Anyway.
Speaker 6: Yeah, we went into it after talking about the show Cheaters,
Speaker 6: so that was kind of the rout cheaters.
Speaker 4: That was the route we took.
Speaker 3: You've never watched jets from the nineties, sounds like a
Speaker 3: nineties or two where the these.
Speaker 7: Uh was hosted by Chris hardwickers.
Speaker 4: No, No, not Chris Hansen either. It was we couldn't
Speaker 4: remember the wormy guy that was the host. But what's
Speaker 4: very nice was it?
Speaker 6: No, he was warmy though, and he would he would
Speaker 6: uh you know with uh the spouse that knew they
Speaker 6: were getting cheated on our girl friend show up with
Speaker 6: them at a gas station. Well while the guy was
Speaker 6: with another woman or something. He'd actually confront cheaters people.
Speaker 2: Well, so they would do it out in the wild,
Speaker 2: ye Like. It wasn't like in front of a live
Speaker 2: studio and show up it.
Speaker 1: They would literally show up.
Speaker 3: A car would be parked in front of a lake,
Speaker 3: this is what we were talking about, and two people
Speaker 3: would be in that car cheating and then the host
Speaker 3: would be like open the door and be like, you're
Speaker 3: we caught you.
Speaker 4: You're cheating sometimes having yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1: Well that's the whole thing. Wasn't all conversation?
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, obviously mixed the two cheaters on the spectrum.
Speaker 4: Let's do it. I just get it.
Speaker 7: It's time, it's time.
Speaker 4: I think this is what.
Speaker 7: Mad TV writers did.
Speaker 4: They would drink something from the from the midcafe.
Speaker 1: I and station. Did you see that? Girls, No, she
Speaker 1: was she was going to think this to try to
Speaker 1: make me go buy faster.
Speaker 6: Oh well, that's what we're talking about. This is that's great.
Speaker 2: The vulnerability though, is I mean I as someone who
Speaker 2: is too vulnerable sometimes on podcasts and cries on stage
Speaker 2: and stuff like that, even for me, because I mean,
Speaker 2: it's so beautiful in a way.
Speaker 7: There's there's it's just.
Speaker 2: So nice to see and it's so sweet and it's
Speaker 2: so pure that at a certain point.
Speaker 10: You're like, oh my god, going and it brings back
Speaker 10: all these personal things about taking that leap of trying
Speaker 10: to kiss for a relative stranger for the first time,
Speaker 10: right and then but then.
Speaker 1: But then they're trying so hard and they're putting something and.
Speaker 2: You want them to go so much, and it's just, yeah,
Speaker 2: it's too much. I found myself in the fetal position
Speaker 2: in the kitchen like a part of an episode.
Speaker 4: Well.
Speaker 3: Also, the other people get really good at like communicating
Speaker 3: where they're just like, I've really liked meeting you, but
Speaker 3: I just don't feel a spark or whatever. We're like,
Speaker 3: this is more like adult communication and more like emotionally
Speaker 3: intelligent communication that I've ever had in any relationship.
Speaker 1: It's so true.
Speaker 2: On the one we wanted to say, it's just like, hey,
Speaker 2: so I'm a little nervous right now, I'm not feeling
Speaker 2: super comfortable. I mean, what have we met two and
Speaker 2: a half times? Like just like being like super forthright
Speaker 2: about it. Yeah, and then they and then she kind
Speaker 2: of opened up too, and then they just went on
Speaker 2: from there, and I noticed it.
Speaker 7: I was like, oh my god, I wish every interact,
Speaker 7: not every interaction, but like dates could just be like that.
Speaker 7: It was just really really lovely.
Speaker 4: I need to revisit it. Yeah, I it did.
Speaker 6: It made me uncomfortable, but not in the way Cheeters did,
Speaker 6: where I thought someone would have a gun.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 7: Did that ever happen on Cheeters?
Speaker 4: Oh yeah?
Speaker 6: There was like that man is a train killer and
Speaker 6: you're knocking on his window telling him.
Speaker 4: That he's a cheater. It was so terrifying.
Speaker 7: Yeah, if you make a lot here, it's kind of cute.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, Christmas Tree Lane, Oh yeah.
Speaker 1: Okay, great.
Speaker 4: I hope they still have their lights up, they don't nuts.
Speaker 1: January thirty three.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I wouldn't be surprised.
Speaker 6: Still, oh yeah, there are houses in my hometown that,
Speaker 6: but just all year round.
Speaker 4: They were the Christmas house.
Speaker 7: Do you know anyone that's kept keeps a Christmas tree
Speaker 7: on for super long time?
Speaker 2: Mm hmm.
Speaker 7: Do you guys know Kevin Avery?
Speaker 4: Probably yeah, yeah, of course.
Speaker 2: The podcaster, Yeah, comedian podcaster guy from San Francisco.
Speaker 7: He would have his and he's he's an adult, grown person.
Speaker 7: He would have it on till like April, his Christmas tree.
Speaker 1: Wow.
Speaker 7: And you would turn the lights on and stuff, Wow.
Speaker 4: I couldn't believe it.
Speaker 2: Not a real tree or a real tree, and they
Speaker 2: would just get like kind of musty and crispy and Christmas.
Speaker 4: I don't know does he does? He love house fires?
Speaker 2: It seems like he was asking for But it must
Speaker 2: have been March when I was at his house and
Speaker 2: it was still it was still going.
Speaker 7: He's like, I don't know, I kind of like it.
Speaker 3: That's crazy. And this smell too, oh that old dog.
Speaker 3: This smell of like a dried up and out of season.
Speaker 3: That really makes a big difference. YEA three months out,
Speaker 3: four months out Wow, these trees, there's like really nice.
Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah, I love Oh, I like I love a
Speaker 6: street that is just lined with old trees.
Speaker 4: This is great. This reminds me of And.
Speaker 1: There are lights.
Speaker 6: Yeah, there's there's bulbs, the big the big bulbs, the classic.
Speaker 4: Night light bulbs.
Speaker 1: We have to climb up to that fuse box and
Speaker 1: turn him on.
Speaker 6: Yeah, oh wow, those have been up there for decades.
Speaker 4: Yeah, my U.
Speaker 6: I had a little night light when I was a kid,
Speaker 6: and every time the bulb burnt out, my dad had
Speaker 6: to climb up to the attic and pull one out
Speaker 6: of our Christmas lights.
Speaker 4: That's what those always remind me of.
Speaker 7: Oh it's really sweet.
Speaker 1: I just got down to the bottom.
Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, yeah, Oh my god.
Speaker 6: It was a reverse experience. You're in an alternate universe
Speaker 6: from in my mouth. You made the right choice coming
Speaker 6: down this street. I want to let's drive slower so
Speaker 6: we can look in the windows.
Speaker 4: They have a fish tank.
Speaker 7: How long did you did you have a night? A night?
Speaker 4: I really hate it dark.
Speaker 6: Oh totally, I don't. It's funny because I don't have
Speaker 6: bad dreams anymore. I'm not bragging, but it's all just
Speaker 6: fun or just boring. Human interaction. I don't really have nightmare,
Speaker 6: but as a kid, I had the most terrifying nightmares
Speaker 6: and I needed.
Speaker 4: I couldn't be in the dark. I couldn't do it either.
Speaker 4: I one big one I remember.
Speaker 2: Is that I was convinced the Pope Like I don't
Speaker 2: know why, but I had convinced myself that the Pope
Speaker 2: was in my closet.
Speaker 7: That was a Catholic school, and I.
Speaker 1: Was Catholic, so Catholic, but I.
Speaker 7: Was like, he's in there, and he's not happy.
Speaker 2: And I didn't think he was gonna do anything, you know,
Speaker 2: sexual or anything.
Speaker 7: I didn't even know if I'm.
Speaker 4: Just judging your outfits.
Speaker 1: Just generally not approving of you.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and I army crawled to my parents room and
Speaker 2: I explained the whole situation. I think I just started
Speaker 2: watching scary movies too early, too, like Nightmare on Elm
Speaker 2: Street and stuff. I just watched all that stuff and
Speaker 2: I just freaked down. I wouldn't leave their bed, and
Speaker 2: my parents immediately started taking me to a child psychologist.
Speaker 4: Really me too, I went. I went to one as well.
Speaker 6: Yeah, it wasn't because of scary dreams, it was it
Speaker 6: was other issues that I won't go into but yeah,
Speaker 6: at age twelve, I went to a child psychologist who
Speaker 6: I've mentioned on here.
Speaker 4: His name was Richard Come.
Speaker 1: And I knew and it was spelled that's all k
Speaker 1: k U M M.
Speaker 4: Grosser.
Speaker 6: And I mean I don't even have to remind everyone
Speaker 6: that Dick.
Speaker 4: Is short for Richard. He actually has.
Speaker 6: A daughter who was I think a psychologists. Now I
Speaker 6: look because I wanted to look up if I had
Speaker 6: made up that name, and indeed it was Richard Come.
Speaker 6: But yeah, I specifically think that the fact that nightmare
Speaker 6: on Elm Street was Oh, this, let's make a monster
Speaker 6: that comes do while you sleep, is meant specifically to
Speaker 6: scare children.
Speaker 1: It's a great idea.
Speaker 4: Oh god, it was terrifying.
Speaker 1: It's amazing.
Speaker 7: Uh you know it's really I this is kind of funny. Wait,
Speaker 7: your psychologist was named Richard Come.
Speaker 2: Yes, I went to a dentist as a child named
Speaker 2: mister Dentist, which tell me it was legally changed.
Speaker 4: Uh no it was not.
Speaker 7: I don't know it just I mean he was a
Speaker 7: bad dentist.
Speaker 2: Did share it was like a budget dentist, And he
Speaker 2: did share a bathroom with like the smog check place, and.
Speaker 7: So everyone had to use the same squeegee.
Speaker 4: That's attached to the key to use the bathroom. Love multitasking,
Speaker 4: and my teeth are still not greet that's.
Speaker 6: So, mister dentist. Maybe it's more like a hey to
Speaker 6: put people at ease. Uh, based in the fact I
Speaker 6: have no training. Let's put the doctor aside. I'm just mister.
Speaker 4: That's yeah, that's that was his legal loophole. No, no,
Speaker 4: I did.
Speaker 6: I never said I was a doctor. It's miss mister dentist.
Speaker 6: I went to art school. I paint teeth white.
Speaker 4: Wow. That is absolutely amazing.
Speaker 6: I would love if if a dentist actually changed there.
Speaker 4: I met this this hippie kid.
Speaker 6: In a bar once, like a you know, a white
Speaker 6: kid with readlocks, and he said, hey, what's up.
Speaker 4: My name's Fun and I'm like, no, it isn't.
Speaker 6: And he pulled out his driver's license and it was
Speaker 6: just the word fun. No last name whoa really yeah?
Speaker 6: And the no name no, it just said the word fun,
Speaker 6: Mike macdona.
Speaker 4: And he was he wasn't fun. He was not fun.
Speaker 1: Turns out he had a personality.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 4: He thought it could change it with his id.
Speaker 1: Chris, you you have to go pack.
Speaker 3: Yeah, oh right, I was just going to keep driving
Speaker 3: around and then I'm like, oh no, there's.
Speaker 1: A heart out.
Speaker 4: What's your heart out? Do you want to talk about it?
Speaker 7: Pick up my daughter from.
Speaker 4: I just like hate having her be the last kid
Speaker 4: to get picked.
Speaker 7: Yeah, oh yeah, so I would do it for you, guys.
Speaker 3: I mean that was so it's so lovely to see you,
Speaker 3: so frank to see you.
Speaker 7: Thanks for having me.
Speaker 1: Thank you for this the worst coffee of all time.
Speaker 1: Do you have anything to plug?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 2: I have a parenting podcast with the very funny American
Speaker 2: Gaily and Kurt brown Eler called I Love my Kid
Speaker 2: but and uh yeah, I love it really fun.
Speaker 4: I'm gonna listen to that. I like a lot of.
Speaker 6: You and yeah, and and you're the best.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's good to see you. I'll go to that
Speaker 4: open mic with you.
Speaker 7: It's on Mondays.
Speaker 4: Okay. It's really fun.
Speaker 2: It's like us and a bunch of kids that love
Speaker 2: stand up and are making fun mistakes.
Speaker 4: That's great.
Speaker 2: It feels like going to Mexican for like when you
Speaker 2: first start. Don't tell anyone about.
Speaker 6: It, Okay, under wraps, allright, you guys, so good to.
Speaker 4: That.
Speaker 1: Beep.
Speaker 4: Lets you know that you've been listening to Do You
Speaker 4: Need a Ride? D y n a Are Beep. This
Speaker 4: has been an exactly right.
Speaker 5: Production produced by Elise Nelson.
Speaker 4: Mixed by Edson Choi.
Speaker 5: Our talent booker is Patrick Kottner.
Speaker 4: Theme song by Karen Kilgarrett.
Speaker 5: Artwork by Chris Fairbanks.
Speaker 3: Follow the show on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook at dinar
Speaker 3: podcast That's d y nar Podcast.
Speaker 6: For more information, go to exactly rightmedia dot com.
Speaker 1: Thank you both, You're welcome