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Speaker 1: Oh my god, we're in person. Oh I'm not gonna lie.

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Speaker 1: I mean, I think just being around you makes me dump.

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Speaker 1: I think that's a coin. It's like drunk drunken. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: we'd be all night. I love when I tried to

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Speaker 1: from like I'm Beyonce. Um. You know what's so interesting

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Speaker 1: is that when you got here, I was like, I'm

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Speaker 1: gonna have a cocktail, and then literally we talked. This

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Speaker 1: is what always happens that, right, we start talking. So

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Speaker 1: I'm now one of my second Martine. I'm gonna paint

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Speaker 1: a picture. She had like a tumbler full of Martin. Listen,

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Speaker 1: it's like soccer mom, martini tumbler. Well that's basically my

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Speaker 1: life now, by the way, But also, can I just

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Speaker 1: like stand up for myself for just a second. I

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Speaker 1: personally don't ever make martini's. My boyfriend is really good

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Speaker 1: at them, and so I'm always like, hey, they will

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Speaker 1: make me a martini. And that's become a new program.

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Speaker 1: When I actually want to have a cocktail, it's like

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Speaker 1: I do a martini and then a glass of wine.

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Speaker 1: Like it's like it's like the perfect combination of tipsy

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Speaker 1: for me. Right, it's not too drunk, but your tipsy,

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Speaker 1: but you know we'll get you. I got a little buzz.

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Speaker 1: I'm like feeling the flow. You know, I'm not going

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Speaker 1: to go like ride a mechanical bull downtown, but I'm

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Speaker 1: like feeling that takes tequila. That takes tend tequila drinks, right,

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Speaker 1: I mean a little off the tequila lately because COVID

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Speaker 1: and I've been at home too much. But um, anyway,

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Speaker 1: and so he's not here, and I just was like, oh,

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Speaker 1: but I have a hankering for a martini, so I

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Speaker 1: googled a recipe, but I think I made a double. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: and you know people are listening to this on Friday

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Speaker 1: morning right, well, you know it's five o'clock somewhere. I mean,

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Speaker 1: it is, that's true. Can you we should invent like

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Speaker 1: a tequila martini? Well, I think they have that. I

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Speaker 1: don't know, or we should just try it. It's just

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Speaker 1: cold chilled tequila. Yeah, it's just chilled tequila with all

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Speaker 1: of you. I mean I like them dirty, yeah, as

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Speaker 1: you do. You know. I mean I feel like if

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Speaker 1: you can make it with gin or vodka, you can

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Speaker 1: make it with tequila. Right. It seems like you tequila

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Speaker 1: has a little bit of a smoky flavor. So maybe

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Speaker 1: it's like we come up with some recipe that's like

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Speaker 1: a smoking smoky more tot. I love that we always

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Speaker 1: like say they's ideas we're going to do and never Okay,

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Speaker 1: on my to do list this at the top of

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Speaker 1: the year, I wrote, we're making a merging store. We're

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Speaker 1: doing it. We're doing that. We were moving to me

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Speaker 1: the other day, tried ain't all It's like I should

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Speaker 1: be offended by that, but I actually just laughed. Now

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Speaker 1: we're doing it, Like in the next four weeks we

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Speaker 1: will have a merged store. Okay, I promised that putting

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Speaker 1: it out there. It's a full moon. It's a full moon, like,

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Speaker 1: oh okay, so um, we're in person and it's actually

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Speaker 1: the first time this year, which makes me so happy

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Speaker 1: because I feel like this is so different for us,

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Speaker 1: the first time since November. Oh yeah, because you were

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Speaker 1: in Virginia for yes, So this is going to be

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Speaker 1: maybe our best episode ever. Be clearly no, but I

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Speaker 1: do feel like in person is so much better. And

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Speaker 1: you and I were talking earlier and I was like,

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Speaker 1: you know, the topics. I feel I have a moment

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Speaker 1: this week that really registers casual for me, and you

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Speaker 1: said you did too. And I feel like, right now

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Speaker 1: what we want to do is just spitball these topics

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Speaker 1: back and forth. Do you want to go first? I

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Speaker 1: feel like yours is actually pretty well. You know, I

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Speaker 1: haven't been blessed with this actual um thing um, but

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Speaker 1: this is more something that I've witnessed, like when you

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Speaker 1: become a meme, you know, like first of all, like

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Speaker 1: when a picture of anybody sort of takes off on

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Speaker 1: the internet, like Kim Kardashian was trying, Yeah, um yeah

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Speaker 1: it's and it becomes a meme and it takes off.

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Speaker 1: There is literally nothing that you can do other than

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Speaker 1: to act casual about it. And obviously there's the big

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Speaker 1: story this week was the Bernie Sanders from the inauguration,

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Speaker 1: Like I mean, it literally gave me life, can you?

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Speaker 1: And they're still rolling in and they're all so good.

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Speaker 1: I thought that I would be sick of it by now,

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Speaker 1: but I'm really not, Like it won't. I don't think

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Speaker 1: it will ever not be funny. In fact, I order

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Speaker 1: so the way that he acted casual, he recognized the moment,

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Speaker 1: and this is brilliant. He put it on a T

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Speaker 1: shirt and a sweatshirt and um sold it for the

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Speaker 1: proceeds going to meals on wheels and to to date

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Speaker 1: they've raised one point eight million. That's insane. First point.

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Speaker 1: I mean, that is literally the epitome of acting casual.

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Speaker 1: You lean into whatever it is that is is being

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Speaker 1: put out there and you just laugh at yourself. To me,

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Speaker 1: I've said this to you before, and I keep referencing

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Speaker 1: the Kardashians, which makes me mad when I do this

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Speaker 1: too much. But they do, like they figured out how

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Speaker 1: to lean into whatever it is they're being made fun

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Speaker 1: of and actually capitalize on it. You capitalize on it,

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Speaker 1: which I love that. Bernie Sanders, who does not need

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Speaker 1: the money, was like, Hey, this is an opportunity for

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Speaker 1: me to raise a ton of money for a good

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Speaker 1: cause because this is not going so I might as well.

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Speaker 1: Brilliant Musgraves did something similar, like there was a meme

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Speaker 1: that happened with her when she one album of the

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Speaker 1: Year and I think she was saying like she was

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Speaker 1: mid saying what and her face was all scrunched up,

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Speaker 1: and it became a meme it's actually your socket. She

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Speaker 1: recognized that and she had a pop socket made and

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Speaker 1: sold millions of them. Probably when I was on Very Cavaliery.

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Speaker 1: A friend of ours paused at the show and screenshot

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Speaker 1: in my face and it looked like that, you know

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Speaker 1: that emoji that has the like windy smile or that's

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Speaker 1: the only way I know how to describe it, is

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Speaker 1: like squiggly face. But it's like it would be what

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Speaker 1: you would do when you feel awkward and uncomfortable and

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Speaker 1: maybe I need to act casual and I'm not quite

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Speaker 1: there yet. My face was that, and he made it

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Speaker 1: into his own kind actually was like I should have

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Speaker 1: sold those because I would have done really well. Oh,

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Speaker 1: I guess, like a really missed opportunity. But let's go

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Speaker 1: back to Bernie Sanders, because this has taken over the nation,

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Speaker 1: and okay, there's a couple of things I want to

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Speaker 1: say about that. I feel like, first of all, this

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Speaker 1: is the first week we have felt comfortable drinking, talking,

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Speaker 1: having fun, acting casual life, and like our country has

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Speaker 1: felt so heavy for so long, and we both said

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Speaker 1: this week, you know, it feels a little lighter. It

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Speaker 1: just feels a little lighter. And I honestly felt like

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Speaker 1: the Bernie meme, like, regardless of your political stance, regardless

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Speaker 1: of how you feel about him, you could look at

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Speaker 1: that and laugh. And we collectively had one thing for

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Speaker 1: one second that we were like, oh my gosh, let's

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Speaker 1: laugh at this, the fact that he had like an

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Speaker 1: envelope in his hand, and it was like, means that

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Speaker 1: like swinging by the inauguration, then swinging by the post office,

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Speaker 1: like I love you know, I love it. There was

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Speaker 1: that one that was like listed off his time schedule,

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Speaker 1: was like swinging by the post office at ten eleven o'clock.

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Speaker 1: Joe's thing, like, no big deal. Just Also, have you

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Speaker 1: seen the video where it's like it's like the person

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Speaker 1: who made Bernie's mitten and it's like the paparazzi chasing them.

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Speaker 1: They're literally jumping down an escalator trying to run from

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Speaker 1: the paparazzi because it's so bad. But it's just stuff

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Speaker 1: like that, like it literally just thinking of Bernie Sanders

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Speaker 1: and all these different places. I made one with a

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Speaker 1: velvet disco queen. I mean, I made one for Lindsay

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Speaker 1: Hell's off. It's just fun, you know, it's just so fun.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god. It was like where's Waldo, but like

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Speaker 1: where's Bernie? Where? Like surely it was not him that

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Speaker 1: thought to like put it on the t or probably

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Speaker 1: someone on his team, but a man of his age

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Speaker 1: with the wherewithal to be like, you know what doing,

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Speaker 1: Oh do your thing, Let's raise some money like that.

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Speaker 1: I mean, and I've I've never been like a huge

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Speaker 1: Bernie supporter, but I mean, I think it's really fucking cool.

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Speaker 1: Like I like him now more after this meme. Oh

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Speaker 1: my god, me too, I think regards That's what I'm saying.

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Speaker 1: Regardless of your politics, you can be like, all right, well,

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Speaker 1: used it for it a very good thing. Um, what

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Speaker 1: was your favorite one? Do you have a favorite one? Oh?

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Speaker 1: My god, Like there's so many, Like I've seen him,

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Speaker 1: Like I've seen him on like a roller coaster in Hollywood,

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Speaker 1: or that really famous photo of like the men building

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Speaker 1: a skyscraper, like sitting on that beam like him him

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Speaker 1: being you would know it if you saw it. I

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Speaker 1: don't know what it's called. It's a really famous photo.

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Speaker 1: It's like workers taking a lunch break onto like a

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Speaker 1: beam that's hanging like in the sky. And then there's Bernie.

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Speaker 1: Like my favorite ones are like where you it takes

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Speaker 1: them inte even see him, and then you're like, oh my,

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Speaker 1: there's herd. He's like always in the background. Or it's

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Speaker 1: like there was there was a couple that I saw

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Speaker 1: that like the whole entire crowd would be Bernie, but

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Speaker 1: you wouldn't notice it, like exactly what I loved. There

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Speaker 1: was one I saw. It was the Lion King, you

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Speaker 1: know when they hold the baby up and it's like, nah,

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Speaker 1: it was berniee so good. There was a fourst gumboe

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Speaker 1: that I loved. I'm trying to think Star Wars. I

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Speaker 1: mean it was all the is there just like a

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Speaker 1: Parker to me, like broke because like you know, they're

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Speaker 1: doing a sex in the City reboot or did they

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Speaker 1: put him in without Samantha. I couldn't do it. So

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Speaker 1: it was the three of them in Bernie. It's brilliant good.

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Speaker 1: It's so smart. The Internet like never ceases to amazement.

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Speaker 1: People are so funny. Well, and whoever I just googled

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Speaker 1: who started the Bernie meme? Because who, like, who ever

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Speaker 1: thought of that and whoever noticed him in the crowd

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Speaker 1: is one of the funniest people I've ever But let's

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Speaker 1: let's go back to literally where was he sitting Like

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Speaker 1: it looked it's like he was relegated to the general

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Speaker 1: admission section. He probably was, I mean, but he wasn't

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Speaker 1: dressed for the occasion, so it says okay. Brendan's I

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Speaker 1: can't pronounce his last name, Similoowski. He's a Washington based

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Speaker 1: photojournalist who covers politics for Wire Service, shot the image

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Speaker 1: of Sanders. That picture is really not that great. It's

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Speaker 1: not the nicest composition in the world. But for whatever reason,

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Speaker 1: I guess he posted it somewhere and someone picked up.

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Speaker 1: I'm trying to see if there's anything else a couple

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Speaker 1: of people like this, says Ashley small As, a PhD

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Speaker 1: student at Penn State, shared the photo photo on her Twitter,

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Speaker 1: writing this could have been an email and so then

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Speaker 1: that that really got went viral. It got one point

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Speaker 1: one million likes, one thirty nine thousands, seven hundred retweets,

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Speaker 1: and then it just picked up and people kept putting

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Speaker 1: in places like do you even know that? Um, what's

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Speaker 1: the sign? Guy? Jewish? Yeah, dude with a sign or whatever?

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Speaker 1: I mean, he had one, like everyone. It was just everywhere.

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Speaker 1: It caught one and it was everywhere, and it was

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Speaker 1: so like it was wholesome and funny. That's right. Honestly,

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Speaker 1: it was the wholesome version of the guy with the

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Speaker 1: big penis that oh what you know what I'm talking about.

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Speaker 1: His name is Mr. Wood. Everyone has seen his penis

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Speaker 1: because it was like the meme that took over the

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Speaker 1: pandemic Bernie was the wholesome version of It was way

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Speaker 1: before the pandemic that this well, that guy had been

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Speaker 1: around for a while, but he took off during the pandemic. Okay,

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Speaker 1: well took off as such a weird word to use,

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Speaker 1: and we're talking about a penis. It's just like there's

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Speaker 1: so many things right now. I meanwhile, he could not

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Speaker 1: casual because sadly he had died years ago, so dark,

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Speaker 1: can you? Okay, let's back check because what if people

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Speaker 1: don't know about this? And we just kind of dropped

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Speaker 1: a couple of little like notes. I mean, there was

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Speaker 1: this guy. He was a point He shot like a

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Speaker 1: point in star. I don't know that he was a

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Speaker 1: porn star, but that photo is from a porn shoot.

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Speaker 1: His name is Mr. Wood. I don't know what his

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Speaker 1: last is, Like, what else would his name be? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: how apropos And he literally has the most giant penis

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Speaker 1: you have ever loved. That you used a fancy word

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Speaker 1: right before you say, he's the biggest giant penis. And

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Speaker 1: it's like one of those things where it's like, I

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Speaker 1: think what made it really take off during COVID was

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Speaker 1: the um people would send a text that was like

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Speaker 1: a COVID update, like click here for an update, and

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Speaker 1: it would just be like and it would just be

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Speaker 1: it would just take you to that picture. But it

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Speaker 1: was then it was um people got really creative and

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Speaker 1: like inserted him into like scenarios, just like they did

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Speaker 1: with Bernie. Obviously that one was the not safe for

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Speaker 1: a work version, and the Bernie is very wholesome. This

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Speaker 1: is like, I mean, talk about acting casual. If you

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Speaker 1: ever see that picture you're like, oh, yeah, are is shocking?

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Speaker 1: Then all I can think when I look at it

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Speaker 1: is like, oh my god, painful. Where where does that?

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Speaker 1: It doesn't even fit in pants? Who is that guy

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Speaker 1: have sex with? I don't know who is she? I

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Speaker 1: need to talk to her because I am so confused

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Speaker 1: how that worked. Yeah, I mean for that a blowjob

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Speaker 1: literally is blowing on it. Oh, i mean you're like

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Speaker 1: testing a tip if you're lucky, it's insane. But also yeah,

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Speaker 1: I mean like I honestly felt like it was a

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Speaker 1: burden for him. It probably was. I don't know what

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Speaker 1: if do we know what happened to him. I'm not

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Speaker 1: sure how he died. Um, but if there is a

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Speaker 1: story on Vice, because when it like started to blow up,

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Speaker 1: Vice like started digging to figure out who he was

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Speaker 1: and what his history was. So there's I think there's

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Speaker 1: a couple of articles that I've read on Vice, but

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Speaker 1: I don't know if it's said. If either of them

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Speaker 1: said how he died, well I might have just been like, well,

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Speaker 1: I was going to try to make it too. I

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Speaker 1: don't know. Maybe maybe I'll try to edit myself a

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Speaker 1: little bit. But yeah, like that picture in and of

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Speaker 1: itself was a lot and it's limp is being honest,

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Speaker 1: like what it's like a football He's he's a show

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Speaker 1: or not a grower though probably yeah, I may We're

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Speaker 1: really good just thinking a lot this right, Let's get

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Speaker 1: back to well, yeah, everyone's like having to pull over

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Speaker 1: on there where to work on Friday? Google Mr wood

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Speaker 1: Penis please. I guess we should put like some sort

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Speaker 1: of disclaimer before kids listen to. Hopefully at this point

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Speaker 1: people know not to do at casual with their kids.

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Speaker 1: But anyway, I think the Bernie meme was so well

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Speaker 1: handled and it was the best description of an at

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Speaker 1: casual moment because you just like what else are you

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Speaker 1: going to leave in? And you just embrace it and

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Speaker 1: you use it for good. Like that is literally the

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Speaker 1: definition of acting casual. Yeah, I think about like random

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Speaker 1: people like obviously Bernie Sanders was famous before that happened,

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Speaker 1: but like you know, there are there are like everyday

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Speaker 1: people who end up in memes. They get passed around

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Speaker 1: like and the thing is is, like my advice would

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Speaker 1: be like laugh about it, Like so what you got labeled?

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Speaker 1: A Karen? You know, like the only the only meme

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Speaker 1: that you don't want to be in is like when

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Speaker 1: it's you doing something that's like racist and totally funked

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Speaker 1: up and you get called out for it, don't Karen

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Speaker 1: when you do that? Yeah? Probably, But but if it is,

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Speaker 1: if it's something that's like not related at all to

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Speaker 1: what the picture is, and it becomes a funny meme,

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Speaker 1: like lead into it, like I have a friend, we

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Speaker 1: have a friend um or I have a friend um

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Speaker 1: who she and her brother like if you google like

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Speaker 1: ugly family photos, she and her brother, she and her

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Speaker 1: brother or one of them, and she thinks it's when

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Speaker 1: they were little too. Did how did they get I

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Speaker 1: don't know. I don't know. Um, like she'll she'll give

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Speaker 1: people like Christmas presents of that photo on a blanket,

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Speaker 1: like and I'm sure she had the process of grieving

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Speaker 1: it because like she was little, you know, it's not

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Speaker 1: like it's a current photo of her that people are like, God,

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Speaker 1: they're ugly. Well, I think all of our egos are

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Speaker 1: big enough to where you can get offended at first.

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Speaker 1: But the people who win are the people who embrace

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Speaker 1: acting casual and they're just like, you know what, this

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Speaker 1: is happening regardless, and you cannot stop the Internet. You can't,

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Speaker 1: you can't, Okay, So do you want to know about

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Speaker 1: mine that year? It's a little bit different than yours.

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Speaker 1: And it came from a friend of a mutual friend

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Speaker 1: of ours actually, and at first he was like super

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Speaker 1: upset about this, And I was upset that he was

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Speaker 1: upset because I felt like it was offensive and I

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Speaker 1: was literally like, we have bigger issues to be upset about.

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Speaker 1: This is not a thing. Why are you texting me

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Speaker 1: about this? But he was upset because he lives near

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Speaker 1: a funeral home. If this could go dark, you gotta

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Speaker 1: help me, like positive, Um, he lives near your funeral home,

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Speaker 1: and so like sometimes when he's driving, he gets stuck

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Speaker 1: in funeral processions, and so last week it happened and

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Speaker 1: he was just like, oh my god, like I have

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Speaker 1: places to go, and I'm like, really, where are you going?

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Speaker 1: Where are we in a rush to get to right now? Um?

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Speaker 1: But he was annoyed because he was kind of just like,

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Speaker 1: I don't understand this. How do I always get caught in?

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Speaker 1: How do I get caught in these things? We go

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Speaker 1: so slow. It's like there's just complete disregard for everyone

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Speaker 1: else and we're all supposed to stop because of something.

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Speaker 1: And I was like, right, but you have to like

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Speaker 1: kind of empathize. Yes, absolutely, And so I got a

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Speaker 1: text woman today that was so interesting because it felt

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Speaker 1: like not casual shift to me. But he was upset,

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Speaker 1: you know, and I was just like, literally, you need

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Speaker 1: to your fucking role here, dude, you were then the

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Speaker 1: wrong and we had this over station. He was like, Okay, fine,

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Speaker 1: I'm just probably being a diva, you know whatever. Um,

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Speaker 1: And then he texted me today this video that I

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Speaker 1: said to you, and it was so good in some

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Speaker 1: way that I kind of felt like this was acting casual.

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Speaker 1: He got caught in another one and he just decided

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Speaker 1: he would join. Yeah. He was like, you can't hold

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Speaker 1: me back. He threw those flashes on and got and

337
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Speaker 1: fell in line. Yeah, and he was actually thrilled about it.

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Speaker 1: He was like, we don't have to stop at stop signs.

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Speaker 1: And I mean, as I'm saying this, I'm kind of like,

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Speaker 1: I hope that people can like laugh about this with

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Speaker 1: us and not feel like we're paying any disrespect to

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Speaker 1: the families or anyone who's passed away. That is my

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Speaker 1: argument to him was, just like pay respect. These people

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Speaker 1: have lost someone they like. In fact, I think you

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Speaker 1: said he's fucking with karma. I did. I told him.

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Speaker 1: I was like, you're going to get some bad, fucking

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Speaker 1: karma goodness. But yeah, like that's the whole point. It's like, look,

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Speaker 1: we've all gotten stuck at a stop sign where you know,

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Speaker 1: there's this long line of cars. We're in a hurry.

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Speaker 1: He lives in a he lives in Nashville, but it's

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Speaker 1: a little rural. He lives a little outside of town,

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Speaker 1: and so I can imagine it's he doesn't have many

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Speaker 1: options for roads when he's trying to go. So when

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Speaker 1: you get stuck at a stop sign and there's a

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Speaker 1: funeral procession, it's like being stopped at a railroad when

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Speaker 1: you have no idea when the train's gonna end. Yes,

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Speaker 1: so if you can fall in line, fall in line,

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Speaker 1: like and then he like felt happy about it. It

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Speaker 1: was like, you know what, I'm going to support this family.

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna ride it out with them, and I'm going

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Speaker 1: to skip the stop signs. That's would have been if

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Speaker 1: he had ended up at the funeral like consoling somebody.

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Speaker 1: I mean, I think it's like it's, yeah, I hope

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Speaker 1: we don't sound insensitive. This is the one thing because

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Speaker 1: it's like, you know, I do have this high level

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Speaker 1: of empathy, and especially with death, I have a really

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Speaker 1: hard time. Like I've always felt this way, even if

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Speaker 1: it's like people in my peripheral that die, like for

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Speaker 1: some reason, it's death is super difficult for me. So

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Speaker 1: like that was my point to him, was like, be

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Speaker 1: fucking sensitive, dude, Like what the fun He's going for

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Speaker 1: a laugh? Too? Was he goes extreme for a laugh?

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Speaker 1: But also I think the point for him was is

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Speaker 1: why is this the tradition? Like why do we do it?

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Speaker 1: So I actually googled that. I was like, why is

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Speaker 1: this the thing? And it's the reason that people move

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Speaker 1: slowly in a procession is so they don't lose other

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Speaker 1: people in the party. And so you're following the hearse

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Speaker 1: because you're normally, yeah, you're following the hearse. You're you're

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Speaker 1: going generally from the church to the site and a

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Speaker 1: lot of a lot of people, you know, you theoretically

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Speaker 1: people would be from out of town. They don't know

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Speaker 1: where they are, so you're trying not to lose people.

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Speaker 1: That's why you put the flashers on. That's why you're

385
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Speaker 1: like there's usually cop at the front and the back

386
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Speaker 1: to right right. And I think that was his point,

387
00:20:45,400 --> 00:20:48,359
Speaker 1: was like why did they get this like entitlement to

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Speaker 1: the road basically? And I'm like, because these people are mourning,

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Speaker 1: you know, like they're going through this really hard time.

390
00:20:55,320 --> 00:20:57,520
Speaker 1: What in your day is more important than that if

391
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Speaker 1: you really think about it. But so that was sort

392
00:20:59,880 --> 00:21:02,640
Speaker 1: of when he embraces He's like Berry's motherfucking boot camp

393
00:21:04,960 --> 00:21:08,359
Speaker 1: classes late, he did take a step back and he

394
00:21:08,400 --> 00:21:10,520
Speaker 1: was like, you're right, like, these people went through a

395
00:21:10,520 --> 00:21:12,320
Speaker 1: really difficult time and I need to think about that

396
00:21:12,440 --> 00:21:14,120
Speaker 1: versus like what I need to do in my day.

397
00:21:14,160 --> 00:21:17,280
Speaker 1: But it is a frustrating tradition. And so today to

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00:21:17,440 --> 00:21:20,479
Speaker 1: casual and just joined it them. I was like, all right,

399
00:21:20,680 --> 00:21:23,600
Speaker 1: imagine if he calls an accident trying to merge, Oh

400
00:21:23,680 --> 00:21:25,919
Speaker 1: my god, I can't. I mean, actually I can. And

401
00:21:26,119 --> 00:21:27,520
Speaker 1: you would have called me to bail him out, is

402
00:21:27,560 --> 00:21:29,320
Speaker 1: the thing. He actually I told him we were going

403
00:21:29,359 --> 00:21:30,760
Speaker 1: to talk about this today. I was like, you just

404
00:21:30,800 --> 00:21:34,119
Speaker 1: gave me my topic where today and he was like,

405
00:21:34,119 --> 00:21:36,359
Speaker 1: you can use my real name, and I decided not,

406
00:21:36,520 --> 00:21:38,760
Speaker 1: so we won't. We won't do that. He gives us

407
00:21:38,800 --> 00:21:42,480
Speaker 1: too much content already. I mean, honestly, he's he's been

408
00:21:42,520 --> 00:21:45,600
Speaker 1: the he's been the guest on the show probably five

409
00:21:45,720 --> 00:21:52,720
Speaker 1: or six times without anyway, those are at casual moments

410
00:21:52,720 --> 00:21:54,080
Speaker 1: of the week. I mean, I actually feel like I've

411
00:21:54,080 --> 00:21:56,280
Speaker 1: probably had a couple of other but like some of

412
00:21:56,320 --> 00:21:58,240
Speaker 1: them or maybe not things I would want to share.

413
00:21:58,560 --> 00:22:01,320
Speaker 1: I mean I've literally just been at home, so I

414
00:22:01,400 --> 00:22:08,440
Speaker 1: know your life sounds a little like tame right now. Yeah, well,

415
00:22:08,720 --> 00:22:12,280
Speaker 1: God give me that vaccine. I'll suck anybody. Oh you

416
00:22:13,480 --> 00:22:17,640
Speaker 1: people heard it here first? Who out there? Also, you're

417
00:22:17,640 --> 00:22:21,199
Speaker 1: looking really good these days. That palets on at keyto.

418
00:22:21,480 --> 00:22:23,760
Speaker 1: I've been doing that keyto. I am been in ketos

419
00:22:23,920 --> 00:22:26,600
Speaker 1: is not for two weeks of all seventeen pounds since

420
00:22:26,680 --> 00:22:32,439
Speaker 1: January four. It's crazy. It's just my body eating itself. Basically.

421
00:22:32,520 --> 00:22:35,560
Speaker 1: Ketosis is like I'm not I haven't had any carbohydrates,

422
00:22:35,560 --> 00:22:38,560
Speaker 1: so my body is using my fat for fuel. Okay,

423
00:22:38,600 --> 00:22:42,760
Speaker 1: so that's how you lose weight? Yeah? Crazy, Yeah, So

424
00:22:42,880 --> 00:22:45,920
Speaker 1: it's your body does this like flip thing where it stops.

425
00:22:45,960 --> 00:22:48,040
Speaker 1: It doesn't have carbohydrates to feed off, so it feeds

426
00:22:48,080 --> 00:22:51,359
Speaker 1: off the fat. Oh my god. It's pretty incredible. And

427
00:22:51,440 --> 00:22:54,320
Speaker 1: I mean i've been I had there was a there

428
00:22:54,359 --> 00:22:56,600
Speaker 1: was a COVID scare, so I was I've been around

429
00:22:56,640 --> 00:23:03,600
Speaker 1: somebody who tested positive. So I isolated and so I

430
00:23:03,640 --> 00:23:06,960
Speaker 1: was just like, I'm going to hunker down and do this.

431
00:23:07,640 --> 00:23:10,360
Speaker 1: So for the last two weeks i've been. It's been

432
00:23:10,520 --> 00:23:12,159
Speaker 1: and I've got these p strips that showed me that

433
00:23:12,160 --> 00:23:15,200
Speaker 1: I'm in qutosis And really, are you laying off booze?

434
00:23:15,359 --> 00:23:18,520
Speaker 1: That's the thing. Um. This is probably the first drink

435
00:23:18,560 --> 00:23:20,000
Speaker 1: i've had in two weeks because I mean I've just

436
00:23:20,040 --> 00:23:22,000
Speaker 1: been I don't really drink at home. I don't really

437
00:23:22,080 --> 00:23:23,760
Speaker 1: drink at home by myself either, Yeah I don't. I

438
00:23:23,760 --> 00:23:26,359
Speaker 1: mean it's I've never really been much of a drinker

439
00:23:26,359 --> 00:23:30,480
Speaker 1: at home. When I lived in l A the first year, Um,

440
00:23:30,560 --> 00:23:35,520
Speaker 1: I lived with two friends, and um, only one of

441
00:23:35,560 --> 00:23:37,360
Speaker 1: them had a job, Like I didn't have a job

442
00:23:37,400 --> 00:23:40,840
Speaker 1: when I got there. And so we were like and

443
00:23:41,359 --> 00:23:43,439
Speaker 1: and Trader Joe's was new to us, so we like

444
00:23:44,440 --> 00:23:46,399
Speaker 1: when we moved into the house that we runt it. It

445
00:23:46,320 --> 00:23:49,159
Speaker 1: It had a wine rack that was the size of

446
00:23:49,200 --> 00:23:51,040
Speaker 1: the whole the back wall of the closet. So we

447
00:23:51,080 --> 00:23:53,000
Speaker 1: went to two and got enough Tuo buck chuck to

448
00:23:53,040 --> 00:23:55,960
Speaker 1: fill it. So we were like drinking every day at home.

449
00:23:56,600 --> 00:23:59,320
Speaker 1: And um, and I think that was like I don't

450
00:23:59,320 --> 00:24:01,280
Speaker 1: need to be doing this. But that's different when you

451
00:24:01,320 --> 00:24:04,000
Speaker 1: live with people. If you're by yourself drinking, it can

452
00:24:04,040 --> 00:24:07,240
Speaker 1: get kind of dark. Yeah, I mean there it is

453
00:24:07,400 --> 00:24:10,639
Speaker 1: a very I've got beers in my fridge, like, but

454
00:24:10,920 --> 00:24:12,560
Speaker 1: I never think like, oh I need a beer at

455
00:24:12,600 --> 00:24:14,639
Speaker 1: the end of the day, or I literally only have

456
00:24:14,720 --> 00:24:17,480
Speaker 1: alcohol and hamas in my refrigerator. We know this, yeah,

457
00:24:18,640 --> 00:24:22,399
Speaker 1: but when I'm by myself at my house, it doesn't

458
00:24:22,480 --> 00:24:26,280
Speaker 1: like it does everyone crosses my mind if it really doesn't.

459
00:24:26,760 --> 00:24:28,719
Speaker 1: Maybe if it's a Friday and I'm like, you know what,

460
00:24:28,760 --> 00:24:30,560
Speaker 1: I have had a week. I'm gonna have a beer

461
00:24:31,400 --> 00:24:35,000
Speaker 1: and it's one, but if I have friends over, I

462
00:24:35,000 --> 00:24:38,080
Speaker 1: will drink four beers. You know, we're not trying to act,

463
00:24:39,040 --> 00:24:42,720
Speaker 1: but I'm like sipping and my parents, like they drink

464
00:24:42,800 --> 00:24:45,840
Speaker 1: every night they have they start having well I mean

465
00:24:45,840 --> 00:24:49,160
Speaker 1: now like but now it's even worse because they're retired,

466
00:24:49,200 --> 00:24:51,359
Speaker 1: so my dad has like a bloody Mary at breakfast.

467
00:24:51,720 --> 00:24:54,040
Speaker 1: They don't have responsive they don't have responsibilities. But when

468
00:24:54,200 --> 00:24:56,919
Speaker 1: they when I was younger and they were like working people,

469
00:24:57,480 --> 00:25:00,000
Speaker 1: they would come home and pour cocktails and they would

470
00:25:00,080 --> 00:25:02,760
Speaker 1: drink three or four cocktails at and it was just

471
00:25:02,840 --> 00:25:05,160
Speaker 1: kind of so I grew up around that and it

472
00:25:05,240 --> 00:25:08,280
Speaker 1: wasn't like I never for a second thought my parents

473
00:25:08,280 --> 00:25:11,560
Speaker 1: are raging alcoholics. So it's like, I don't know, it's

474
00:25:11,560 --> 00:25:15,359
Speaker 1: not I'm not my way because I experienced something where

475
00:25:15,400 --> 00:25:17,120
Speaker 1: I was like, I don't want to turn into that

476
00:25:17,560 --> 00:25:21,359
Speaker 1: because my parents are really fun, but yeah, I don't know,

477
00:25:21,480 --> 00:25:23,520
Speaker 1: it just never really appealed to me, I think as

478
00:25:23,560 --> 00:25:25,800
Speaker 1: long as you feel like you're doing. I don't know

479
00:25:25,800 --> 00:25:28,080
Speaker 1: how we got on this topic. This cut like we

480
00:25:28,080 --> 00:25:31,720
Speaker 1: were drinking. We are drinking. It is such a weird

481
00:25:31,760 --> 00:25:34,120
Speaker 1: balance because I always try to balance too between like

482
00:25:34,760 --> 00:25:37,600
Speaker 1: like what is enough? What is like what is too much?

483
00:25:37,640 --> 00:25:40,320
Speaker 1: It's like it's it's a weird thing, and like I've

484
00:25:40,359 --> 00:25:42,959
Speaker 1: never really known a healthy relationship with that, and so

485
00:25:43,119 --> 00:25:46,560
Speaker 1: like trying to navigate that myself has been something I've

486
00:25:46,560 --> 00:25:49,320
Speaker 1: done as an adult. But what's funny because I've never

487
00:25:49,359 --> 00:25:53,080
Speaker 1: worried about like what's too much? Like I am like

488
00:25:53,359 --> 00:25:58,359
Speaker 1: i'd go full, and I just I just don't. It

489
00:25:58,440 --> 00:26:00,119
Speaker 1: just doesn't cross my mind. Oh, I know how we

490
00:26:00,160 --> 00:26:01,680
Speaker 1: got on to it. You asked me if I was

491
00:26:01,760 --> 00:26:04,200
Speaker 1: laying off the booze, because to me, when a lay

492
00:26:04,240 --> 00:26:08,040
Speaker 1: off the booze, immediately my stomach gets flat, like it's like, oh,

493
00:26:09,119 --> 00:26:12,679
Speaker 1: that's what that little poof was or something. Yeah, but

494
00:26:12,760 --> 00:26:14,520
Speaker 1: it's like because like sometimes you just have a glass

495
00:26:14,520 --> 00:26:16,440
Speaker 1: of on with dinner, but like you don't realize, oh,

496
00:26:16,480 --> 00:26:26,480
Speaker 1: that's extra calories or that's actually the worst worst. I

497
00:26:26,480 --> 00:26:28,119
Speaker 1: actually have some emails I want to read through you

498
00:26:28,160 --> 00:26:30,879
Speaker 1: because we've gotten We've got a lot, but these I

499
00:26:30,920 --> 00:26:33,920
Speaker 1: picked the top. Well, I think maybe I'll just do too,

500
00:26:33,920 --> 00:26:35,800
Speaker 1: because we've kind of gone a little longer than I thought.

501
00:26:35,920 --> 00:26:39,800
Speaker 1: But um, this came from Erica, who we actually talked

502
00:26:39,920 --> 00:26:43,640
Speaker 1: to last week or maybe this is two weeks ago.

503
00:26:43,960 --> 00:26:46,000
Speaker 1: We talked about her and she was having the trouble

504
00:26:46,040 --> 00:26:49,160
Speaker 1: with her HR manager. Do you remember this? Okay? So

505
00:26:49,200 --> 00:26:52,160
Speaker 1: she wrote back because she listened to the episode where

506
00:26:52,160 --> 00:26:54,439
Speaker 1: we did talk to her, and she said, hey, friends,

507
00:26:54,480 --> 00:26:57,280
Speaker 1: thanks for reading my email on the podcast. I'm following

508
00:26:57,320 --> 00:26:59,560
Speaker 1: up to let you know I appreciate your advice on it.

509
00:26:59,640 --> 00:27:02,120
Speaker 1: I just wanted to say that when HR said those

510
00:27:02,160 --> 00:27:04,800
Speaker 1: uncomfortable things, my supervisor was there and she was able

511
00:27:04,800 --> 00:27:07,040
Speaker 1: to take it to our manager, who was able to

512
00:27:07,080 --> 00:27:09,720
Speaker 1: address it so that the employees didn't have to because

513
00:27:09,720 --> 00:27:11,520
Speaker 1: I remember we were like, Erica, you need to just

514
00:27:11,680 --> 00:27:15,240
Speaker 1: address yeah, So she didn't have to, which I actually

515
00:27:15,280 --> 00:27:19,520
Speaker 1: loved for her because that's such an uncomfortable situation. She said,

516
00:27:19,520 --> 00:27:21,399
Speaker 1: I have to say, I'm also an impath, and I

517
00:27:21,480 --> 00:27:24,600
Speaker 1: take things to heart quite easily. This woman also told

518
00:27:24,640 --> 00:27:27,119
Speaker 1: a black man who doesn't work for the company anymore

519
00:27:27,160 --> 00:27:30,320
Speaker 1: that her fiance is a cop, which she thought was

520
00:27:30,359 --> 00:27:32,639
Speaker 1: a threat because it was during the summer as well.

521
00:27:33,200 --> 00:27:35,760
Speaker 1: She also basically told me my engagement ring was ugly,

522
00:27:36,400 --> 00:27:39,359
Speaker 1: so that I responded, it's the ring my fiance gave

523
00:27:39,400 --> 00:27:41,959
Speaker 1: me and for that, I absolutely love it, which I

524
00:27:42,000 --> 00:27:47,800
Speaker 1: agree with Erica here, trying to be so sounds like

525
00:27:47,800 --> 00:27:51,240
Speaker 1: an idiot, just sounds like a bit. Yeah, I definitely

526
00:27:51,240 --> 00:27:54,080
Speaker 1: don't want to cancel her per se, but sometimes I

527
00:27:54,119 --> 00:27:56,680
Speaker 1: feel the need to distance myself to protect my feelings.

528
00:27:56,680 --> 00:27:59,000
Speaker 1: I'm also a tourist of the stubborn trait and me

529
00:27:59,080 --> 00:28:02,240
Speaker 1: can be aggressive of I've been working on extending grace

530
00:28:02,280 --> 00:28:06,000
Speaker 1: to people I don't agree with on things that includes

531
00:28:06,080 --> 00:28:08,479
Speaker 1: people who may hurt me. Your advice made me realize

532
00:28:08,520 --> 00:28:11,080
Speaker 1: I need to start advocating for myself and feeling more

533
00:28:11,320 --> 00:28:15,439
Speaker 1: even if it's uncomfortable and awkward. Love the podcast and

534
00:28:15,480 --> 00:28:17,919
Speaker 1: thanks thanks for being the friends I look forward to

535
00:28:18,000 --> 00:28:23,000
Speaker 1: hearing from every Friday. Erica also she sent a picture

536
00:28:23,040 --> 00:28:27,920
Speaker 1: of her and her fiance and they're beautiful, like insanely gorgeous.

537
00:28:27,920 --> 00:28:32,120
Speaker 1: It looks like an ad from a magazine. But um, anyway,

538
00:28:32,440 --> 00:28:34,359
Speaker 1: so I'm just glad that she didn't have to handle

539
00:28:34,400 --> 00:28:36,800
Speaker 1: that herself. And I also just think this lady needs

540
00:28:36,840 --> 00:28:41,320
Speaker 1: to go. Yeah, why is she the HR person? I

541
00:28:41,360 --> 00:28:46,640
Speaker 1: can't process sup at work? The person she's actually kind

542
00:28:46,680 --> 00:28:50,320
Speaker 1: of a great character for a movie, Like, Yeah, it's

543
00:28:50,360 --> 00:28:54,800
Speaker 1: like the HR person who just sucks everything up would

544
00:28:54,800 --> 00:28:58,440
Speaker 1: happened on the office. The person who is not supposed

545
00:28:58,440 --> 00:29:00,239
Speaker 1: to be in that job is in that job, And

546
00:29:00,320 --> 00:29:02,520
Speaker 1: that kind of sounds like this person to me, like

547
00:29:02,920 --> 00:29:06,880
Speaker 1: she should not be in this job. It's not the

548
00:29:07,000 --> 00:29:11,040
Speaker 1: right job they should. Like, how can you like funk

549
00:29:11,160 --> 00:29:13,880
Speaker 1: over an HR person really well at work? Like? How

550
00:29:13,920 --> 00:29:16,240
Speaker 1: can you make her mess up her job so bad?

551
00:29:16,760 --> 00:29:20,080
Speaker 1: I don't think you have to make her messian that's

552
00:29:19,440 --> 00:29:21,800
Speaker 1: a point. I think you would just have to report her.

553
00:29:21,840 --> 00:29:24,400
Speaker 1: But to me, I'm like, Erica, you just put your

554
00:29:24,440 --> 00:29:27,480
Speaker 1: head down into your work and keep doing you boo

555
00:29:27,520 --> 00:29:30,360
Speaker 1: because you look so beautiful and so happy, and don't

556
00:29:30,360 --> 00:29:41,400
Speaker 1: worry about this bitch by give me my insurance. Okay,

557
00:29:41,600 --> 00:29:45,600
Speaker 1: So this one she wants to remain anonymous, although this

558
00:29:45,680 --> 00:29:49,560
Speaker 1: was hilarious to me. She wouldn't sign the email even

559
00:29:49,560 --> 00:29:54,600
Speaker 1: though it comes. But I'm like, oh, sweetie, your email

560
00:29:54,680 --> 00:29:59,080
Speaker 1: says your day. But I respect her signed unsigned, she

561
00:29:59,160 --> 00:30:01,560
Speaker 1: said I I, she said, I can't think of a

562
00:30:01,560 --> 00:30:03,760
Speaker 1: fun name about lying, but I don't want to use

563
00:30:03,840 --> 00:30:07,120
Speaker 1: my real name. Baha ha ha ha. The struggle it's real.

564
00:30:07,760 --> 00:30:10,600
Speaker 1: And I was like, but I know your name, Karen,

565
00:30:10,920 --> 00:30:17,400
Speaker 1: just kidding. It's not Karen, um No, I know anonymous. Yeah, Annie,

566
00:30:17,440 --> 00:30:19,880
Speaker 1: I like it, um No, But I love her emails,

567
00:30:19,880 --> 00:30:23,520
Speaker 1: so we're gonna read that. Hey, Kelly and Chip, longtime listener,

568
00:30:23,680 --> 00:30:26,360
Speaker 1: first time writer here. I love listening to your podcast

569
00:30:26,360 --> 00:30:28,479
Speaker 1: because it feels like I'm just shooting the ship with friends.

570
00:30:28,680 --> 00:30:31,040
Speaker 1: It also makes me laugh on my walks with my dogs,

571
00:30:31,040 --> 00:30:33,840
Speaker 1: so I'm pretty sure my neighbors think I'm insane. Thanks

572
00:30:33,880 --> 00:30:36,560
Speaker 1: for all the good times. I'm hoping you can weigh

573
00:30:36,560 --> 00:30:38,440
Speaker 1: in on a situation I've been dealing with for a

574
00:30:38,520 --> 00:30:41,680
Speaker 1: very long time. I'm a mid thirties doctor and I

575
00:30:41,760 --> 00:30:44,000
Speaker 1: met one of my best friends in med school. You

576
00:30:44,080 --> 00:30:46,840
Speaker 1: go through the trenches together in med school and your

577
00:30:46,880 --> 00:30:50,760
Speaker 1: other trenches, so you're really forming lasting friendships. My best

578
00:30:50,760 --> 00:30:53,760
Speaker 1: friend has always been known in our very long large

579
00:30:53,880 --> 00:30:57,240
Speaker 1: friend group as the one downer that's in air quotes,

580
00:30:57,800 --> 00:31:00,680
Speaker 1: if life, I'm sorry in lie. If there are people

581
00:31:00,720 --> 00:31:02,840
Speaker 1: who like to one up you. But in the medical

582
00:31:02,880 --> 00:31:05,360
Speaker 1: training there are one downers, and these are the people

583
00:31:05,400 --> 00:31:08,440
Speaker 1: who constantly tell you how much harder they have it

584
00:31:08,440 --> 00:31:11,239
Speaker 1: than everyone else. We've been friends for eight years, so

585
00:31:11,320 --> 00:31:13,760
Speaker 1: at this point I've accepted that she's a one downer.

586
00:31:14,080 --> 00:31:19,720
Speaker 1: Her schedule is always the hardest, she works the most.

587
00:31:19,960 --> 00:31:23,840
Speaker 1: Also in quotes, her patients are the sickest. Also in quote.

588
00:31:24,280 --> 00:31:27,600
Speaker 1: I saw this trend as we continue our medical training,

589
00:31:27,720 --> 00:31:32,640
Speaker 1: during residency, fellowship, and now being attendings I'm recently, I've

590
00:31:32,680 --> 00:31:35,520
Speaker 1: recently come to realize these people need to know that

591
00:31:35,560 --> 00:31:42,160
Speaker 1: I'm drinking. This is too hard Annie Um. I've recently

592
00:31:42,200 --> 00:31:46,600
Speaker 1: come to realize that she is blatantly lying about how

593
00:31:46,640 --> 00:31:50,400
Speaker 1: often she works. For example, a few weeks ago back,

594
00:31:50,760 --> 00:31:53,880
Speaker 1: she told me she was working at the hospital all weekend.

595
00:31:54,240 --> 00:31:56,480
Speaker 1: When she told our other friend, who lives out of town,

596
00:31:56,600 --> 00:31:59,360
Speaker 1: she was off, she told me she didn't have one

597
00:31:59,440 --> 00:32:03,480
Speaker 1: day for three weeks, which wasn't true. My other friend

598
00:32:03,560 --> 00:32:07,800
Speaker 1: confirmed it. Now I've noticed that she'll complain about how patients,

599
00:32:08,520 --> 00:32:10,880
Speaker 1: how many patients she sees in a clinic, so I

600
00:32:10,920 --> 00:32:13,360
Speaker 1: got curious and I checked her schedule. Anyone in the

601
00:32:13,440 --> 00:32:16,240
Speaker 1: system can look at that low and behold she's lying

602
00:32:16,240 --> 00:32:18,880
Speaker 1: about that. She will exaggerate about how many patients she

603
00:32:18,960 --> 00:32:22,640
Speaker 1: sees by at least two or more patients a day,

604
00:32:22,920 --> 00:32:26,080
Speaker 1: and how late they're scheduled. This is so strange to me,

605
00:32:26,120 --> 00:32:29,840
Speaker 1: because who the funk cares exactly? I don't care if

606
00:32:29,880 --> 00:32:31,920
Speaker 1: she works more than me or if she works less

607
00:32:31,920 --> 00:32:33,880
Speaker 1: than me. I just don't like being lied to you

608
00:32:33,880 --> 00:32:36,720
Speaker 1: by someone I trust. We are in completely different specialties

609
00:32:36,800 --> 00:32:40,240
Speaker 1: or our jobs don't resemble each other. I purposely choose

610
00:32:40,680 --> 00:32:43,600
Speaker 1: chose a specialty with decent work life balance, and she

611
00:32:43,720 --> 00:32:47,000
Speaker 1: chose one that's notorious for poor life balance. Mostly just

612
00:32:47,480 --> 00:32:51,520
Speaker 1: thorough training. I'm happy with my choices, and I don't

613
00:32:51,520 --> 00:32:54,400
Speaker 1: feel bad about it. I still end up working very hard,

614
00:32:54,440 --> 00:32:57,520
Speaker 1: and I'm proud of that. My questions for you one,

615
00:32:57,880 --> 00:33:00,360
Speaker 1: why do you think she's doing this too? What are

616
00:33:00,360 --> 00:33:04,320
Speaker 1: your thoughts about the white lies? Three? I'm very non confrontational,

617
00:33:04,400 --> 00:33:06,720
Speaker 1: so I don't want to say anything to her, but

618
00:33:06,880 --> 00:33:15,440
Speaker 1: would you? Four? Annie, I'm tired. Can you be friends

619
00:33:15,520 --> 00:33:19,080
Speaker 1: with someone who is constantly telling you white lies? Or

620
00:33:19,200 --> 00:33:25,240
Speaker 1: is that the harbinger? Do you know what that means? Harbinger?

621
00:33:25,680 --> 00:33:27,800
Speaker 1: What does that mean? How does she finish it for

622
00:33:27,920 --> 00:33:32,760
Speaker 1: something worse. Yeah, it's like a sign it's good. M

623
00:33:33,520 --> 00:33:36,880
Speaker 1: this is why. That's a harbinger of something. Yeah, here's

624
00:33:36,920 --> 00:33:43,920
Speaker 1: my thought. She lying about more serious things. PS. I

625
00:33:43,960 --> 00:33:46,040
Speaker 1: know this sounds like sixteen year old drama, but I'm

626
00:33:46,040 --> 00:33:48,520
Speaker 1: pretty shocked by how many things I've noticed recently that

627
00:33:48,560 --> 00:33:52,239
Speaker 1: she's purposely lying about. Thanks for your help, sincerely, I

628
00:33:52,280 --> 00:33:54,560
Speaker 1: can't think of fun name, but I'm lying about my

629
00:33:54,640 --> 00:34:03,960
Speaker 1: real name, Annie um any. Yeah, you know. Here's the thing.

630
00:34:04,040 --> 00:34:07,360
Speaker 1: It's like the funny thing is is like everything that

631
00:34:07,400 --> 00:34:11,000
Speaker 1: she's lying about is misery. So it's like she's taking

632
00:34:11,640 --> 00:34:17,120
Speaker 1: she finds pleasure in her situation being worse than everyone else.

633
00:34:17,480 --> 00:34:20,400
Speaker 1: I wonder if it's like And obviously we don't know

634
00:34:20,440 --> 00:34:23,040
Speaker 1: any of these people, so there's so many circumstances in

635
00:34:23,080 --> 00:34:27,040
Speaker 1: the situation that we just don't know. But like, is

636
00:34:27,040 --> 00:34:29,879
Speaker 1: she the only single one? Is she? Like? Are there

637
00:34:29,880 --> 00:34:34,759
Speaker 1: reasons for her to amplify like why her life is worse? Look,

638
00:34:35,040 --> 00:34:39,759
Speaker 1: we we know people like this, my eyes, we know

639
00:34:39,880 --> 00:34:44,640
Speaker 1: people like this, and we also know people like this

640
00:34:44,800 --> 00:34:49,680
Speaker 1: whose situation isn't nearly as terrible as they want the

641
00:34:49,680 --> 00:34:53,280
Speaker 1: world to think it is. And I think it's a weird,

642
00:34:53,440 --> 00:34:57,960
Speaker 1: sort of outwardly form of self pity. Um. And the

643
00:34:58,000 --> 00:35:01,040
Speaker 1: truth is is like Anni lated out, she chose this

644
00:35:01,120 --> 00:35:04,000
Speaker 1: line of specialty. Like the bed that she is in

645
00:35:04,239 --> 00:35:09,759
Speaker 1: she made. So why is it everyone else's responsibility to

646
00:35:09,880 --> 00:35:16,279
Speaker 1: make it better? It's not. It's not. And first of all,

647
00:35:16,360 --> 00:35:18,799
Speaker 1: like nobody wants to be around somebody who's complaining all

648
00:35:18,800 --> 00:35:23,760
Speaker 1: the time. It's just not a good characteristic. Well also,

649
00:35:23,960 --> 00:35:27,080
Speaker 1: it's not a competition about your life is worse than mine, Like,

650
00:35:27,160 --> 00:35:31,799
Speaker 1: it's just not. And like there's some stuff that I think, Uh,

651
00:35:33,280 --> 00:35:35,560
Speaker 1: I have a couple of things in my mind, all right, well,

652
00:35:35,560 --> 00:35:38,600
Speaker 1: because there was there was something that publicly was said

653
00:35:38,600 --> 00:35:41,600
Speaker 1: about me about that and that's not true for me.

654
00:35:41,680 --> 00:35:46,920
Speaker 1: It's just not so I mean that was I'm struggling here,

655
00:35:47,320 --> 00:35:50,759
Speaker 1: help me get out of this situation. I just like

656
00:35:51,040 --> 00:35:54,280
Speaker 1: it's like I think that certain people can be very insensitive,

657
00:35:54,719 --> 00:35:57,359
Speaker 1: and so obviously those are not people you want your

658
00:35:57,360 --> 00:36:00,480
Speaker 1: life either. But it doesn't sound like our friend Annie

659
00:36:00,560 --> 00:36:03,320
Speaker 1: air quotes is like that. It sounds like she actually

660
00:36:03,360 --> 00:36:08,040
Speaker 1: wants to be a good friend to people. And I

661
00:36:08,080 --> 00:36:10,520
Speaker 1: think that what I hear in this is just like

662
00:36:10,800 --> 00:36:13,120
Speaker 1: why are you friends with this person? Like? What is

663
00:36:13,160 --> 00:36:16,239
Speaker 1: she bringing to your life? Like that That's the thing

664
00:36:16,280 --> 00:36:19,439
Speaker 1: that we've had to think about about some situations we've

665
00:36:19,440 --> 00:36:21,960
Speaker 1: been in and now, like I just like I don't understand,

666
00:36:22,000 --> 00:36:26,560
Speaker 1: like she's lying to you, She's things that don't matter matter,

667
00:36:26,760 --> 00:36:30,000
Speaker 1: But like, so like why is this a relationship you're

668
00:36:30,080 --> 00:36:32,880
Speaker 1: continuing to pursue. What it sounds like to me is

669
00:36:32,920 --> 00:36:36,480
Speaker 1: that the friend is not very mature. Because if you're

670
00:36:36,480 --> 00:36:39,040
Speaker 1: telling one person you're working, and you're telling someone else

671
00:36:39,080 --> 00:36:41,360
Speaker 1: that you're not, you're telling the person that you're working

672
00:36:41,800 --> 00:36:43,840
Speaker 1: for a reason because you don't want to do what

673
00:36:43,880 --> 00:36:48,600
Speaker 1: they're asking you to do. There's something you say, thank

674
00:36:48,640 --> 00:36:50,440
Speaker 1: you for the invite, but I don't really feel like

675
00:36:50,480 --> 00:36:52,840
Speaker 1: doing that this weekend. But you also, like as an adult,

676
00:36:52,880 --> 00:36:54,800
Speaker 1: would know how to set the boundaries so that you

677
00:36:54,800 --> 00:36:57,359
Speaker 1: can take care of yourself. You don't have to lie, right, Yeah,

678
00:36:57,880 --> 00:37:01,440
Speaker 1: So I mean I think it's I think the conundrum

679
00:37:01,480 --> 00:37:04,759
Speaker 1: that Annie is in. You either have to address it,

680
00:37:05,239 --> 00:37:07,719
Speaker 1: and I think there's non confrontational ways to address it

681
00:37:08,120 --> 00:37:10,040
Speaker 1: if you want this person to stay in your life,

682
00:37:10,680 --> 00:37:12,960
Speaker 1: or you have to recognize that this person is a liar.

683
00:37:13,680 --> 00:37:17,839
Speaker 1: And those sorts of things do sort of snowball, like

684
00:37:18,160 --> 00:37:21,640
Speaker 1: if she's willing to lie about stupid shit, Like I

685
00:37:21,719 --> 00:37:24,280
Speaker 1: have more patients a day than you. You don't understand

686
00:37:24,280 --> 00:37:28,080
Speaker 1: how hard my day is. Like everybody's day is hard,

687
00:37:28,360 --> 00:37:31,440
Speaker 1: and it's all relative in there is not one person

688
00:37:31,560 --> 00:37:34,040
Speaker 1: a relative and be like, my life is harder than

689
00:37:34,080 --> 00:37:39,960
Speaker 1: your everyone's life is collectively hard. That is what the

690
00:37:40,040 --> 00:37:42,440
Speaker 1: universe is teaching us right now, is that everyone has

691
00:37:42,480 --> 00:37:46,280
Speaker 1: their own ship. I just believe that so but it's snowballs.

692
00:37:46,320 --> 00:37:48,959
Speaker 1: And I think that people who are inherent liars, like

693
00:37:49,440 --> 00:37:52,080
Speaker 1: when they get away with it, it is fuel for

694
00:37:52,120 --> 00:37:55,960
Speaker 1: them to lie about bigger and bigger things, and that

695
00:37:56,320 --> 00:38:00,400
Speaker 1: you know, it breaks down trust. It's just I'm like,

696
00:38:00,560 --> 00:38:03,640
Speaker 1: I don't want relationships with liars, Like at this point

697
00:38:03,680 --> 00:38:06,480
Speaker 1: in my life, I'm making conscious decisions about who I

698
00:38:06,560 --> 00:38:09,400
Speaker 1: allow in my life, and like I don't know who

699
00:38:09,520 --> 00:38:11,840
Speaker 1: it annie is, but I'm just kind of I'm in

700
00:38:11,840 --> 00:38:15,480
Speaker 1: my mid thirties at this point. Shouldn't you just be like, hey,

701
00:38:15,680 --> 00:38:18,759
Speaker 1: not worth my fucking time, man, Like you can't tell

702
00:38:18,800 --> 00:38:22,200
Speaker 1: me the truth, You can't just like have any sort

703
00:38:22,200 --> 00:38:24,719
Speaker 1: of empathy for anyone else. It's all about you all

704
00:38:24,719 --> 00:38:26,440
Speaker 1: the time. You're not going to get what are you

705
00:38:26,560 --> 00:38:29,960
Speaker 1: getting from this relationship? That's what I just would want

706
00:38:30,000 --> 00:38:35,560
Speaker 1: to know. It's like when you have a history with somebody, though,

707
00:38:35,680 --> 00:38:39,120
Speaker 1: it's hard to sort of just like toss people aside,

708
00:38:39,320 --> 00:38:42,000
Speaker 1: especially if they're still in your life, you know. Like

709
00:38:43,320 --> 00:38:45,239
Speaker 1: I mean, for me, some of my best friends who

710
00:38:45,520 --> 00:38:47,880
Speaker 1: from college like that are still some of them. I

711
00:38:47,920 --> 00:38:50,480
Speaker 1: would consider them some of my best friends, but I

712
00:38:50,480 --> 00:38:53,160
Speaker 1: don't talk to them every day, like, so I don't

713
00:38:53,200 --> 00:38:55,520
Speaker 1: have that same sort of attachment because it sounds like

714
00:38:55,560 --> 00:38:58,200
Speaker 1: they're still in each other's lives. Do sound like in

715
00:38:58,480 --> 00:39:00,399
Speaker 1: a major way, but if you have to see each

716
00:39:00,440 --> 00:39:04,680
Speaker 1: other a lot, I just I guess I'm just very

717
00:39:04,760 --> 00:39:07,160
Speaker 1: guarded of my energy as of late, and so I'm

718
00:39:07,200 --> 00:39:11,120
Speaker 1: reading this and I'm like, I don't know. I'm also confrontational,

719
00:39:11,239 --> 00:39:14,600
Speaker 1: like if I have an issue, I'm going to address it.

720
00:39:14,719 --> 00:39:19,839
Speaker 1: So I am having a harder time relating. However, I

721
00:39:19,880 --> 00:39:22,600
Speaker 1: can empathize and and say like, yeah, you've been through

722
00:39:22,640 --> 00:39:24,719
Speaker 1: a lot together. But like I think when you get

723
00:39:24,719 --> 00:39:26,920
Speaker 1: to your mid thirties, especially as the point in your

724
00:39:26,960 --> 00:39:30,080
Speaker 1: life where you ask yourself, what is this person giving me?

725
00:39:30,239 --> 00:39:33,080
Speaker 1: What are they bringing to my life that's positive? And

726
00:39:33,120 --> 00:39:36,160
Speaker 1: if they're not, who has space for that anymore? Well?

727
00:39:36,160 --> 00:39:38,040
Speaker 1: And I also think if if it has gotten to

728
00:39:38,080 --> 00:39:41,680
Speaker 1: the point where you and you're going on whatever data

729
00:39:41,719 --> 00:39:45,080
Speaker 1: system your office has to be like wait a minute, no,

730
00:39:45,280 --> 00:39:47,359
Speaker 1: she wasn't working that day. And these are the number

731
00:39:47,360 --> 00:39:49,839
Speaker 1: of patients like you have been pushed to the point

732
00:39:49,840 --> 00:39:53,799
Speaker 1: where you're investigating. You're wasting your time on someone who,

733
00:39:53,880 --> 00:39:56,239
Speaker 1: like it, probably isn't giving a second thought to you.

734
00:39:56,760 --> 00:40:00,000
Speaker 1: Which that is where like I would say to any

735
00:40:00,120 --> 00:40:02,960
Speaker 1: protect your energy and put it into something positive, or

736
00:40:03,920 --> 00:40:06,840
Speaker 1: you care enough you have to address it, or yes, exactly,

737
00:40:06,840 --> 00:40:08,880
Speaker 1: it's one of the two things. Put your put your

738
00:40:08,960 --> 00:40:12,239
Speaker 1: energy into something other relationships that are more positive and

739
00:40:12,280 --> 00:40:15,160
Speaker 1: fulfilling for you, or address it with her. And I mean,

740
00:40:15,320 --> 00:40:17,480
Speaker 1: I don't think this girl sounds like she could handle

741
00:40:18,160 --> 00:40:21,279
Speaker 1: being confronted, but see how it goes. Maybe she could

742
00:40:21,320 --> 00:40:24,600
Speaker 1: respond and like make some changes. Maybe she's unaware. You

743
00:40:24,600 --> 00:40:26,279
Speaker 1: could also have some fun with it. You could just

744
00:40:26,320 --> 00:40:30,080
Speaker 1: be like you could like play the let's see if

745
00:40:30,280 --> 00:40:33,600
Speaker 1: she'll one up everybody and like everyone come with like

746
00:40:33,640 --> 00:40:38,560
Speaker 1: a you won't believe what happened today, Like you just

747
00:40:38,600 --> 00:40:40,759
Speaker 1: have to like see if she'll be like, well I

748
00:40:40,800 --> 00:40:44,840
Speaker 1: had you know, it's so crazy because I had fifty

749
00:40:44,880 --> 00:40:48,640
Speaker 1: and it was in and then the other person is like, yeah,

750
00:40:48,640 --> 00:40:50,480
Speaker 1: I had sixty two, and then you're like yeah, and

751
00:40:50,520 --> 00:40:52,720
Speaker 1: then someone's like, bitch, you weren't even at work today,

752
00:40:52,880 --> 00:40:57,600
Speaker 1: like you you forgot, but I checked her schedule. You

753
00:40:57,640 --> 00:41:01,319
Speaker 1: didn't go to work. I saw you at Walmart at

754
00:41:01,360 --> 00:41:11,279
Speaker 1: three o'clock and you didn't see him. Sure, Walmart downtime shoplifting,

755
00:41:11,360 --> 00:41:15,200
Speaker 1: for sure. She has so much money, but she shot

756
00:41:16,080 --> 00:41:18,759
Speaker 1: because her life is hard and she needs it. She's like,

757
00:41:18,760 --> 00:41:22,080
Speaker 1: I deserve this. I deserve these panties. I mean I

758
00:41:22,160 --> 00:41:26,200
Speaker 1: just hands panties. I deserve them because I had more

759
00:41:26,239 --> 00:41:30,080
Speaker 1: patients than anybody can actually officially have it. Like, I

760
00:41:30,120 --> 00:41:32,800
Speaker 1: don't know about y'all, but even though I had no patience,

761
00:41:33,000 --> 00:41:37,080
Speaker 1: I had more patience. I worked overtime just to have

762
00:41:37,160 --> 00:41:41,040
Speaker 1: more patience. So I deserve these panties. Yeah, they free

763
00:41:43,360 --> 00:41:48,600
Speaker 1: paint her. I gotta go. I just gotta go. Oh God,

764
00:41:48,960 --> 00:41:51,000
Speaker 1: I wish you all could see this. She's got her

765
00:41:51,560 --> 00:41:53,960
Speaker 1: she's got her Martini glass up against the side of

766
00:41:53,960 --> 00:41:57,760
Speaker 1: the picture. I'll fucking boast. It is a bad idea.

767
00:41:58,080 --> 00:42:01,359
Speaker 1: This is the worst idea I ever put it back

768
00:42:01,440 --> 00:42:06,080
Speaker 1: near your face, like doing business. I mean, this is

769
00:42:06,080 --> 00:42:09,520
Speaker 1: not is this business? This is like sadly a business.

770
00:42:09,600 --> 00:42:14,600
Speaker 1: But like I look so terrible right now, you guys,

771
00:42:15,040 --> 00:42:19,160
Speaker 1: two more tins. Oh I need to go to bed. Literally,

772
00:42:19,800 --> 00:42:23,480
Speaker 1: the sun literally just have to go to bed. Not

773
00:42:23,520 --> 00:42:26,920
Speaker 1: even six isn't Why are martinis like, oh it's sexy?

774
00:42:28,360 --> 00:42:31,279
Speaker 1: Al right? Well that note. Okay. I'm just glad that

775
00:42:31,320 --> 00:42:34,760
Speaker 1: we're back. Like this feels like maybe we're making movement

776
00:42:34,840 --> 00:42:38,080
Speaker 1: forward and we're back. Yeah, we're back. Gosh. Okay, So

777
00:42:38,120 --> 00:42:40,640
Speaker 1: you guys keep the questions coming to at casual at

778
00:42:40,719 --> 00:42:44,200
Speaker 1: Velvet's Edge dot com, because we're fucking we're back, and

779
00:42:44,280 --> 00:42:47,160
Speaker 1: we're gonna birch and we're gonna kill the We're gonna

780
00:42:47,239 --> 00:42:52,080
Speaker 1: kill this game whatever that means. Whatever that means. We'll

781
00:42:52,120 --> 00:42:54,480
Speaker 1: sets and I'll be like, why did I do that?

782
00:42:54,560 --> 00:42:55,960
Speaker 1: You know what, Chip, I'm going to kill the game

783
00:42:55,960 --> 00:42:58,640
Speaker 1: more than you're going to kill the game. Yeah, you know,

784
00:42:59,320 --> 00:43:02,040
Speaker 1: I'm gonna I've got twice as many game killers as

785
00:43:02,080 --> 00:43:04,200
Speaker 1: you know. The way that I kill the game is

786
00:43:04,280 --> 00:43:06,160
Speaker 1: better than the way that you kill the game. Well,

787
00:43:06,360 --> 00:43:11,880
Speaker 1: I'm off tomorrow anyway. Actually, I have a full have

788
00:43:11,960 --> 00:43:14,840
Speaker 1: so much. I have a full day tomorrow too, whatever.

789
00:43:14,880 --> 00:43:18,759
Speaker 1: Monday is fuller. Well, I have a birthday launch. Oh

790
00:43:18,800 --> 00:43:21,120
Speaker 1: well I have a dinner, so I have a happy

791
00:43:21,160 --> 00:43:26,600
Speaker 1: hour too. Oo. See you there, No mind's earlier than you.

792
00:43:28,520 --> 00:43:31,359
Speaker 1: We gotta we gotta go. Okay, you guys send your

793
00:43:31,360 --> 00:43:34,120
Speaker 1: emails to at casual at velvet edge dot com, or

794
00:43:34,160 --> 00:43:36,280
Speaker 1: you can hit us up on Instagram. I'm at Velvet

795
00:43:36,360 --> 00:43:39,719
Speaker 1: Edge and Chip is at Chip for that for the

796
00:43:39,719 --> 00:43:43,719
Speaker 1: people though, h I P D O R s H.

797
00:43:44,200 --> 00:43:48,840
Speaker 1: I mean mine's easier. This is longer. You're like minds longer.

798
00:43:48,880 --> 00:43:51,680
Speaker 1: It's like got more like vs. It has more like

799
00:43:51,920 --> 00:43:55,120
Speaker 1: edge things like that. Okay, anyway, we gotta go. I

800
00:43:55,200 --> 00:43:58,520
Speaker 1: gotta gotta go. Drinks on water. You guys have a

801
00:43:58,520 --> 00:44:01,640
Speaker 1: great week. Thanks for listening. As always, isn't always remembered.

802
00:44:01,960 --> 00:44:04,240
Speaker 1: Act Casual Bite