1 00:00:18,880 --> 00:00:22,320 Speaker 1: Hello, everyone, it's your big sister Cheeky's and you've reached 2 00:00:22,320 --> 00:00:26,320 Speaker 1: my personal voicemailbox for the Dear Cheekys podcast. I'm here 3 00:00:26,360 --> 00:00:28,880 Speaker 1: to give you advice on anything and everything you need 4 00:00:28,960 --> 00:00:31,480 Speaker 1: help with, whether you're going through a breakup or having 5 00:00:31,560 --> 00:00:34,000 Speaker 1: issues with your family, or maybe you have a question 6 00:00:34,000 --> 00:00:36,600 Speaker 1: about my personal life. Whatever the case is, I want 7 00:00:36,600 --> 00:00:39,400 Speaker 1: to hear from you. Remember these are my thoughts in 8 00:00:39,440 --> 00:00:42,040 Speaker 1: my opinions, and if you're suffering from a serious issue 9 00:00:42,159 --> 00:00:45,560 Speaker 1: or hardship, you should seek help from a qualified professional. 10 00:00:45,960 --> 00:00:48,800 Speaker 1: All right, now, go ahead and leave your message. At 11 00:00:48,800 --> 00:00:49,800 Speaker 1: the sound of the beeB. 12 00:00:51,520 --> 00:00:56,480 Speaker 2: Hi bb, it's me again, Alexis Sebastis. I have more 13 00:00:56,560 --> 00:00:59,640 Speaker 2: so like a request for you, Like I know you've 14 00:00:59,720 --> 00:01:03,360 Speaker 2: had your different eras in music, you know, and I 15 00:01:03,400 --> 00:01:05,679 Speaker 2: love that right now you're in your healing era, you know, 16 00:01:05,720 --> 00:01:08,400 Speaker 2: the whole flow is. It's so cute. But I have 17 00:01:08,440 --> 00:01:11,080 Speaker 2: a request. I feel like, I don't know, I feel 18 00:01:11,120 --> 00:01:14,120 Speaker 2: like I'm waiting for that sexy era and I know 19 00:01:14,200 --> 00:01:16,119 Speaker 2: you can do it because you know you've given us 20 00:01:16,160 --> 00:01:20,440 Speaker 2: like Baty, you gave us ex I love those songs, 21 00:01:20,480 --> 00:01:22,720 Speaker 2: So I don't know, I feel like I need like 22 00:01:22,800 --> 00:01:25,440 Speaker 2: a whole phase. I'm not saying I'm not going to 23 00:01:25,480 --> 00:01:27,920 Speaker 2: you a hole. I'm the whole. But I don't know, 24 00:01:27,959 --> 00:01:31,400 Speaker 2: I feel like it would eat like a sexy era, 25 00:01:32,040 --> 00:01:33,560 Speaker 2: Like I don't know, I just want to see that 26 00:01:33,680 --> 00:01:35,880 Speaker 2: from you. I don't know, It's just an idea. 27 00:01:36,440 --> 00:01:41,279 Speaker 1: Okay, bye, alexis the bestis love? 28 00:01:43,080 --> 00:01:43,640 Speaker 3: You made me? 29 00:01:44,000 --> 00:01:49,080 Speaker 1: Literally l ol. Yeah, maybe I do need my little 30 00:01:49,080 --> 00:01:51,840 Speaker 1: hoe face And I know exactly what you mean, like 31 00:01:51,880 --> 00:01:56,040 Speaker 1: this sexy kind of like yeah, because I don't want 32 00:01:56,040 --> 00:01:57,520 Speaker 1: to like say names because then I'm not trying to 33 00:01:57,520 --> 00:02:00,200 Speaker 1: call them hose. But like it's that vibe of of 34 00:02:00,440 --> 00:02:03,400 Speaker 1: maybe the Kalu Chiese and like the just like just 35 00:02:03,560 --> 00:02:08,120 Speaker 1: owning your sexuality and like, yes, the Patti for sure 36 00:02:08,360 --> 00:02:12,080 Speaker 1: is that I'm not mad at it. I think with 37 00:02:12,200 --> 00:02:15,440 Speaker 1: the next album that's coming out in March, you'll be 38 00:02:15,520 --> 00:02:17,840 Speaker 1: able to get a little bit of that in my voice, 39 00:02:17,960 --> 00:02:23,320 Speaker 1: especially the songs are very healing and but very sexy. 40 00:02:23,400 --> 00:02:27,320 Speaker 1: I'm using like a different side of my voice. But yeah, 41 00:02:27,400 --> 00:02:30,040 Speaker 1: I'm definitely cooking something up with this music. So I 42 00:02:30,040 --> 00:02:34,079 Speaker 1: think it's definitely gonna eat the way you say. But hey, 43 00:02:34,120 --> 00:02:36,320 Speaker 1: that's not a bad suggestion. I appreciate that, and I 44 00:02:36,360 --> 00:02:38,480 Speaker 1: think I could do it. I think I could, I 45 00:02:38,520 --> 00:02:42,399 Speaker 1: just don't know when. But yeah, actually there's a song 46 00:02:42,440 --> 00:02:45,880 Speaker 1: on this album that I can probably bring that forward. 47 00:02:46,120 --> 00:02:48,160 Speaker 1: And I don't know, I don't know. I got you. 48 00:02:48,320 --> 00:02:51,399 Speaker 1: Don't even triplexis we'll make it happen sooner rather than later. 49 00:02:51,400 --> 00:02:53,600 Speaker 1: Don't even trip, but thank you. I love the suggestions. 50 00:02:53,680 --> 00:02:59,680 Speaker 1: Keep them coming, Okay, guys. Next question comes from oh 51 00:03:00,160 --> 00:03:01,600 Speaker 1: nomous listener Let's see. 52 00:03:01,840 --> 00:03:06,200 Speaker 3: Hi, Ti Giz. I'm a mother of three currently going 53 00:03:06,240 --> 00:03:10,560 Speaker 3: through postpartum seven weeks to be exact, with my new baby. 54 00:03:11,040 --> 00:03:13,280 Speaker 3: I'm just feeling lonely these. 55 00:03:13,120 --> 00:03:18,240 Speaker 4: Days and feeling like a single married mother raising these 56 00:03:18,360 --> 00:03:19,560 Speaker 4: kids all by myself. 57 00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:21,079 Speaker 3: I don't know what to do. 58 00:03:22,000 --> 00:03:24,320 Speaker 4: I like that my husband provides for us and gives 59 00:03:24,360 --> 00:03:27,840 Speaker 4: us the lifestyle that we have, but it just sucks 60 00:03:27,919 --> 00:03:31,240 Speaker 4: that I don't get the help that I need. I 61 00:03:31,280 --> 00:03:36,360 Speaker 4: feel like I'm mentally breaking down constantly. I don't get 62 00:03:36,400 --> 00:03:40,520 Speaker 4: a break, and it sucks. I love my kids, I 63 00:03:40,560 --> 00:03:44,000 Speaker 4: love my husband, but I don't know what to do. 64 00:03:45,160 --> 00:03:48,920 Speaker 4: I'm better off being single. I mean, if this man 65 00:03:49,720 --> 00:03:55,440 Speaker 4: is not helping me, he just thinks by providing is 66 00:03:55,480 --> 00:03:58,480 Speaker 4: the help that I need, and by him giving us 67 00:03:58,560 --> 00:04:01,280 Speaker 4: what we want, that's it's not what we want. I 68 00:04:01,400 --> 00:04:03,960 Speaker 4: want him to be here and be hands on and 69 00:04:04,000 --> 00:04:07,800 Speaker 4: help me. But then people tell me I'm selfish because 70 00:04:08,600 --> 00:04:11,040 Speaker 4: they're like, you wouldn't be able to afford the lifestyle 71 00:04:11,160 --> 00:04:15,480 Speaker 4: you have if your husband's not working, and I just 72 00:04:15,520 --> 00:04:16,240 Speaker 4: feel stuck. 73 00:04:17,200 --> 00:04:20,520 Speaker 3: I don't know what to do. I pray and pray 74 00:04:20,560 --> 00:04:24,360 Speaker 3: on it, but I'm lost. 75 00:04:26,080 --> 00:04:31,200 Speaker 1: Hi. I wish I know your name, but it's okay, totally, 76 00:04:31,279 --> 00:04:33,840 Speaker 1: I totally get you. I thank you for leaving this 77 00:04:33,920 --> 00:04:37,599 Speaker 1: question and being honest because I know that this is 78 00:04:37,680 --> 00:04:40,840 Speaker 1: very common and a lot of mothers just press forward 79 00:04:41,640 --> 00:04:44,080 Speaker 1: and don't really speak about this. And this is very real. 80 00:04:44,320 --> 00:04:46,720 Speaker 1: I mean, you just had a baby seven weeks ago postpartum. 81 00:04:47,160 --> 00:04:49,400 Speaker 1: From what I hear is real. I mean I saw 82 00:04:49,400 --> 00:04:52,039 Speaker 1: it with my sister, so I know that it is 83 00:04:52,120 --> 00:04:54,039 Speaker 1: real and I validate your feelings. I want you to 84 00:04:54,120 --> 00:04:57,400 Speaker 1: know that I completely see what you're saying and you're 85 00:04:57,440 --> 00:05:01,520 Speaker 1: not being ungrateful. Thank God your husband has a good 86 00:05:01,600 --> 00:05:04,599 Speaker 1: job and is able to provide for you guys, but 87 00:05:04,800 --> 00:05:07,920 Speaker 1: quality time is very important and for you to feel 88 00:05:08,120 --> 00:05:11,440 Speaker 1: like you could have a break if need be is important. 89 00:05:12,120 --> 00:05:15,479 Speaker 1: Here's my suggestion. As I was listening to your voice, note, 90 00:05:15,800 --> 00:05:18,599 Speaker 1: I think what would help you if he can't be 91 00:05:18,680 --> 00:05:21,479 Speaker 1: there physically. I think you need to have a conversation. 92 00:05:21,600 --> 00:05:25,200 Speaker 1: I think you're confused, and I'm telling you because when 93 00:05:25,240 --> 00:05:28,000 Speaker 1: I feel I'm confused and I don't know which direction 94 00:05:28,120 --> 00:05:32,760 Speaker 1: to take, it's usually because I'm not voicing my feelings 95 00:05:33,320 --> 00:05:36,320 Speaker 1: and I'm not expressing what it is that I need. 96 00:05:36,800 --> 00:05:40,960 Speaker 1: So I start suppressing and repressing, and then it becomes frustration, 97 00:05:41,120 --> 00:05:43,400 Speaker 1: and it becomes anxiety, and I want to cry and 98 00:05:43,440 --> 00:05:46,400 Speaker 1: I want to scream because I'm not expressing. There's so 99 00:05:46,480 --> 00:05:49,400 Speaker 1: much power in expressing. I think you need to sit 100 00:05:49,440 --> 00:05:52,359 Speaker 1: your husband down and say, look, I am grateful for 101 00:05:52,440 --> 00:05:58,200 Speaker 1: what you're doing. Grateful, thank you. I need my husband though, 102 00:05:59,279 --> 00:06:01,839 Speaker 1: even if it's an hour a night where you come home. 103 00:06:01,880 --> 00:06:04,640 Speaker 1: I know you work, but I also have been home 104 00:06:04,640 --> 00:06:07,280 Speaker 1: with the kids, and explain to him everything that you do, 105 00:06:07,400 --> 00:06:09,360 Speaker 1: like this is what I do on a daily basis. 106 00:06:09,839 --> 00:06:11,640 Speaker 1: I don't have time for myself. You get to go 107 00:06:11,839 --> 00:06:15,000 Speaker 1: out and be yourself and he doesn't worry about what's 108 00:06:15,000 --> 00:06:17,640 Speaker 1: happening in the house. That's your identity right now. Or 109 00:06:17,680 --> 00:06:20,119 Speaker 1: your children in the house, everything that everyone else needs, 110 00:06:20,360 --> 00:06:23,240 Speaker 1: what about you. So you need to explain that to him, 111 00:06:23,720 --> 00:06:26,680 Speaker 1: Say hey, at least an hour a weekend where it's 112 00:06:26,720 --> 00:06:29,360 Speaker 1: like it's not work and it's just us and I'm 113 00:06:29,400 --> 00:06:31,919 Speaker 1: able to have my husband and feel my partner that 114 00:06:32,040 --> 00:06:35,359 Speaker 1: companionship of him helping with the kids. They're not just 115 00:06:35,400 --> 00:06:37,839 Speaker 1: your kids, they're his kids too, and that's okay for 116 00:06:37,920 --> 00:06:40,360 Speaker 1: you to express it. And it's also okay this This 117 00:06:40,440 --> 00:06:43,440 Speaker 1: was my other suggestion. It seems like he does well 118 00:06:43,920 --> 00:06:46,600 Speaker 1: for himself and for your family. What if you get 119 00:06:46,600 --> 00:06:49,159 Speaker 1: a sitter doesn't have to be every day. It could 120 00:06:49,200 --> 00:06:52,440 Speaker 1: be twice a week, someone that you trust, someone that 121 00:06:52,480 --> 00:06:56,560 Speaker 1: you guys pay interview a few people. But you do 122 00:06:56,680 --> 00:07:00,920 Speaker 1: need you time, and that's okay. Right now, you're going 123 00:07:01,000 --> 00:07:04,600 Speaker 1: through a lot again. Understand that your hormones have it. 124 00:07:04,600 --> 00:07:07,080 Speaker 1: It's going to take a while for them to come 125 00:07:07,120 --> 00:07:10,920 Speaker 1: back to balance. So have some compassion because your body 126 00:07:10,960 --> 00:07:14,600 Speaker 1: just went through a lot. But there's nothing wrong with 127 00:07:14,640 --> 00:07:16,960 Speaker 1: you needing a break and needing a breather. Even if 128 00:07:16,960 --> 00:07:18,600 Speaker 1: you don't leave the house and you're just in your 129 00:07:18,680 --> 00:07:21,240 Speaker 1: room watching whatever you want to watch and doing whatever 130 00:07:21,240 --> 00:07:23,120 Speaker 1: you want to do, even if it's just taking a nap, 131 00:07:23,560 --> 00:07:26,320 Speaker 1: having someone there to help you to clean the house, 132 00:07:26,400 --> 00:07:28,760 Speaker 1: to do this, to do that. Like, I think that 133 00:07:28,800 --> 00:07:31,280 Speaker 1: would be good for you to go out and say, hey, 134 00:07:31,280 --> 00:07:33,080 Speaker 1: stay with the kids just for a couple hours. I'm 135 00:07:33,080 --> 00:07:34,840 Speaker 1: going to go get my nels done. That's having you 136 00:07:35,000 --> 00:07:37,160 Speaker 1: time and then you're going to come back and be 137 00:07:37,240 --> 00:07:39,160 Speaker 1: happy and be with your children. You're not having you 138 00:07:39,160 --> 00:07:42,400 Speaker 1: don't have that right now. So I think those are 139 00:07:42,400 --> 00:07:44,120 Speaker 1: the two things that you should probably talk to your 140 00:07:44,160 --> 00:07:47,480 Speaker 1: husband about and always start the conversation with how grateful 141 00:07:47,480 --> 00:07:51,240 Speaker 1: you are with like a positive affirmation and positive reinforcement, 142 00:07:51,320 --> 00:07:54,760 Speaker 1: because again you're not being ungrateful. But a man sees 143 00:07:54,800 --> 00:07:57,800 Speaker 1: things as okay, very logical. I go to work, I 144 00:07:57,840 --> 00:07:59,680 Speaker 1: come back, I'm working, I'm providing, I have a roof 145 00:07:59,680 --> 00:08:03,600 Speaker 1: over eye head. Yeah, but there's much more to that. 146 00:08:04,120 --> 00:08:08,080 Speaker 1: So yeah, I would definitely talk to him as soon 147 00:08:08,080 --> 00:08:10,760 Speaker 1: as possible and let him know. Again, express your feelings, babe, 148 00:08:10,760 --> 00:08:13,760 Speaker 1: and it's all how we deliver our message, and really 149 00:08:13,840 --> 00:08:16,440 Speaker 1: think about that. Think about having someone come help you. 150 00:08:17,040 --> 00:08:19,200 Speaker 1: I think that will definitely alleviate a lot of it, 151 00:08:19,520 --> 00:08:22,360 Speaker 1: and yeah, let us know what happens Okay, I'm sending 152 00:08:22,400 --> 00:08:24,320 Speaker 1: you a big, big hug. You got this, girl, You 153 00:08:24,400 --> 00:08:26,320 Speaker 1: got this. It's gonna be all right. And cry if 154 00:08:26,360 --> 00:08:28,320 Speaker 1: you need to cry, because crying is also a form 155 00:08:28,320 --> 00:08:37,400 Speaker 1: of releasing, so just let that shit out. Okay, guys. 156 00:08:37,440 --> 00:08:38,360 Speaker 1: Last question comes. 157 00:08:38,160 --> 00:08:40,079 Speaker 3: From Kathy Hey t G. 158 00:08:40,520 --> 00:08:47,760 Speaker 5: Since you raised or help raise your four siblings, how 159 00:08:47,800 --> 00:08:52,200 Speaker 5: did you get vied? They're a teenage era that is 160 00:08:53,240 --> 00:09:00,160 Speaker 5: very rocky and could change based on their mood. How 161 00:09:00,160 --> 00:09:05,680 Speaker 5: did you maneuver them being able to come to you 162 00:09:06,840 --> 00:09:13,880 Speaker 5: and not seeing you as like the annoying parent or 163 00:09:15,280 --> 00:09:20,720 Speaker 5: worst like enemy or like you're always strong but my 164 00:09:20,840 --> 00:09:24,120 Speaker 5: peers are right type of thing? Kind of stuck here. 165 00:09:25,200 --> 00:09:30,200 Speaker 1: Thanks Hi, Kathy. You know, I really appreciate this question 166 00:09:30,400 --> 00:09:33,680 Speaker 1: because I'm not a mom yet, but the fact that 167 00:09:33,800 --> 00:09:36,560 Speaker 1: you trust me enough to give you advice because you 168 00:09:36,559 --> 00:09:38,920 Speaker 1: know I've raised my siblings means a lot to me, 169 00:09:39,120 --> 00:09:42,680 Speaker 1: for real, because sometimes I feel bad giving mom's advice 170 00:09:42,720 --> 00:09:46,000 Speaker 1: because I'm not a mom yet myself. But I really feel, like, 171 00:09:46,520 --> 00:09:48,559 Speaker 1: well not really feel I did raise my siblings and 172 00:09:48,600 --> 00:09:52,080 Speaker 1: it was tough and those years are difficult, Kathy, So 173 00:09:52,120 --> 00:09:55,800 Speaker 1: I get you. I didn't have that much trouble with Jenica, 174 00:09:56,840 --> 00:09:59,520 Speaker 1: too much trouble. She was always just like a very 175 00:10:00,720 --> 00:10:03,240 Speaker 1: introverted type of girl, which would worry me, so I 176 00:10:03,240 --> 00:10:05,680 Speaker 1: would try to pull things out of her. But I 177 00:10:05,679 --> 00:10:07,240 Speaker 1: didn't really have a lot of trouble. She just did 178 00:10:07,240 --> 00:10:10,000 Speaker 1: what she had to do. Johnny, on the other hand, 179 00:10:11,440 --> 00:10:12,720 Speaker 1: gave me a run for my money. 180 00:10:12,720 --> 00:10:13,160 Speaker 3: Girl. 181 00:10:14,040 --> 00:10:16,920 Speaker 1: I went through a lot with him. I was very stern, 182 00:10:17,640 --> 00:10:22,360 Speaker 1: very stern. It's hard to find the balance between being 183 00:10:22,600 --> 00:10:25,800 Speaker 1: the parent and wanting to be a friend. I think 184 00:10:25,840 --> 00:10:28,280 Speaker 1: it just depends on the type of child you have 185 00:10:28,400 --> 00:10:31,839 Speaker 1: or what you're dealing with. Because I see my sister 186 00:10:31,960 --> 00:10:35,520 Speaker 1: right now, Jackie and Jayla is in her teenage years. 187 00:10:35,600 --> 00:10:38,680 Speaker 1: My niece she is sixteen, and right now we're going 188 00:10:38,720 --> 00:10:42,880 Speaker 1: through it with her doing normal kid stuff. But right 189 00:10:42,920 --> 00:10:45,800 Speaker 1: now is the time, right now before they turn eighteen, 190 00:10:46,000 --> 00:10:48,080 Speaker 1: is where it's like, this is the time that I 191 00:10:48,080 --> 00:10:49,439 Speaker 1: have where I can tell you what to do and 192 00:10:49,559 --> 00:10:51,440 Speaker 1: you have to do it, especially if you're living under 193 00:10:51,440 --> 00:10:54,280 Speaker 1: my roof. These are my rules. And that's how I 194 00:10:54,520 --> 00:10:57,160 Speaker 1: was because that's what I learned from my mom, and 195 00:10:57,200 --> 00:10:59,000 Speaker 1: that's how I was with Johnny because that's what I 196 00:10:59,040 --> 00:11:01,400 Speaker 1: had to learned from my mother. My mom was very 197 00:11:01,480 --> 00:11:04,520 Speaker 1: much no locked doors in the house, you come home 198 00:11:04,559 --> 00:11:07,280 Speaker 1: at a certain time. There's no cussing. Even if I cuss, 199 00:11:07,520 --> 00:11:09,520 Speaker 1: there's no cussing in my home. You respect my home. 200 00:11:09,960 --> 00:11:12,360 Speaker 1: I pay the bills here. If you don't like my rules, 201 00:11:12,400 --> 00:11:15,480 Speaker 1: get out, you know. And that's the truth. It's kind 202 00:11:15,480 --> 00:11:17,960 Speaker 1: of like, yeah, you're right, gotta follow. Doesn't matter if 203 00:11:18,000 --> 00:11:19,880 Speaker 1: I'm twenty three living in your house. I can't be 204 00:11:19,920 --> 00:11:23,240 Speaker 1: getting home at one am. It's disrespectful. So anyway, the 205 00:11:23,280 --> 00:11:27,040 Speaker 1: point is that I think you need to choose if 206 00:11:27,040 --> 00:11:29,520 Speaker 1: you want to be a friend to your child or 207 00:11:29,559 --> 00:11:32,439 Speaker 1: a strict parent, whether they like it or not, if 208 00:11:32,440 --> 00:11:36,120 Speaker 1: you're having difficulty with them speaking to you. Jackie just 209 00:11:36,160 --> 00:11:37,560 Speaker 1: started doing this with her kids, and I thought it 210 00:11:37,600 --> 00:11:40,640 Speaker 1: was genius. She started journaling with them, asking them a 211 00:11:40,720 --> 00:11:43,880 Speaker 1: question every other day in their journal what can I 212 00:11:43,920 --> 00:11:45,959 Speaker 1: do to be a better mom? And then they answer 213 00:11:46,040 --> 00:11:47,960 Speaker 1: and then they leave you a question like So they 214 00:11:47,960 --> 00:11:51,240 Speaker 1: were asking each other back and forth, and that's a 215 00:11:51,280 --> 00:11:53,600 Speaker 1: good way to communicate because sometimes it's a little scary 216 00:11:53,600 --> 00:11:55,400 Speaker 1: to do it in person. So I thought that was 217 00:11:55,480 --> 00:11:57,640 Speaker 1: really cool that she's doing that. That's a good suggestion. 218 00:11:58,240 --> 00:12:02,920 Speaker 1: But I think children want structure. They appreciate structure. That's 219 00:12:02,960 --> 00:12:05,520 Speaker 1: showing that we care, that we love them, that we 220 00:12:05,559 --> 00:12:07,360 Speaker 1: want the best for them. And they're not always gonna 221 00:12:07,400 --> 00:12:10,160 Speaker 1: like it, and they're gonna bitch and freaking cry about it. 222 00:12:10,200 --> 00:12:13,280 Speaker 1: But it's okay, you're doing what's best for them. But 223 00:12:13,320 --> 00:12:17,160 Speaker 1: when you're trying to be a child's friend, the lines 224 00:12:17,200 --> 00:12:21,400 Speaker 1: get blurred and disrespect starts happening, and they feel too 225 00:12:21,400 --> 00:12:24,880 Speaker 1: comfortable and they just start doing things and it's kind 226 00:12:24,880 --> 00:12:27,040 Speaker 1: of like they kind of need to be a little scared. 227 00:12:27,640 --> 00:12:30,719 Speaker 1: I feel I was scared of my mom, maybe a 228 00:12:30,760 --> 00:12:34,800 Speaker 1: little too much, so there's a balance there. But she 229 00:12:34,960 --> 00:12:36,599 Speaker 1: really kept me in line because I didn't want to 230 00:12:36,600 --> 00:12:38,520 Speaker 1: disappoint her. There was a lot of like, this is 231 00:12:38,559 --> 00:12:40,719 Speaker 1: what needs to happen in this household. And maybe that's 232 00:12:40,760 --> 00:12:42,160 Speaker 1: why I am the way that I am as far 233 00:12:42,160 --> 00:12:44,520 Speaker 1: as like getting shit done, because she put that in 234 00:12:44,559 --> 00:12:47,480 Speaker 1: my head so much. But she had a really good 235 00:12:47,559 --> 00:12:52,720 Speaker 1: balance between, hey, we're cool, but these are my rules, 236 00:12:53,320 --> 00:12:56,520 Speaker 1: you know. And it's tough. I know it is, but again, 237 00:12:56,559 --> 00:12:58,480 Speaker 1: I wish I had a little more information as far 238 00:12:58,520 --> 00:13:01,559 Speaker 1: as like what exactly is how happening with your children, 239 00:13:01,760 --> 00:13:03,760 Speaker 1: so I can give you better advice. But I think 240 00:13:03,800 --> 00:13:05,400 Speaker 1: that question that I told you to ask yourself, if 241 00:13:05,440 --> 00:13:06,560 Speaker 1: you want to be a friend or more of a 242 00:13:06,559 --> 00:13:09,920 Speaker 1: strict parent, I think you can start there. But if 243 00:13:09,920 --> 00:13:11,480 Speaker 1: you want to leave me another voice note and tell 244 00:13:11,480 --> 00:13:13,319 Speaker 1: me and give me more details, I'd be more than 245 00:13:13,400 --> 00:13:17,079 Speaker 1: happy because I feel like I do have quite a 246 00:13:17,080 --> 00:13:20,079 Speaker 1: bit of advice because I was raising children that aren't 247 00:13:20,200 --> 00:13:23,960 Speaker 1: or didn't come out of me. But I feel you, girl, 248 00:13:24,880 --> 00:13:30,080 Speaker 1: those years are tough, Johnny from eleven it started eleven 249 00:13:30,160 --> 00:13:34,840 Speaker 1: years old, twelve years old to like nineteen, Oh my gosh, 250 00:13:35,679 --> 00:13:40,000 Speaker 1: ooh girl, But it's okay. I think it's a great kid. 251 00:13:40,240 --> 00:13:43,760 Speaker 1: I was very strict with him, very strict, and I 252 00:13:43,800 --> 00:13:47,400 Speaker 1: do believe in discipline. Whatever that means to you. Discipline 253 00:13:47,440 --> 00:13:51,520 Speaker 1: I think is important. Okay, miss Kathy. I hope that helped, 254 00:13:51,600 --> 00:13:55,280 Speaker 1: And thank you Alexis to our ananymous listener and to Kathy, 255 00:13:55,320 --> 00:13:57,880 Speaker 1: Thank you guys for your questions, Thank you for taking 256 00:13:57,920 --> 00:13:59,880 Speaker 1: the time, and I hope I was able to help 257 00:13:59,880 --> 00:14:02,600 Speaker 1: you with my advice. And if you have a question, 258 00:14:02,640 --> 00:14:05,280 Speaker 1: guys you already know Speakpipe dot Com, slash Cheekys and 259 00:14:05,360 --> 00:14:07,960 Speaker 1: Chill Podcast your favorite podcast. I'll catch you here on 260 00:14:07,960 --> 00:14:15,000 Speaker 1: the next episode of Dear Cheeky's. This is a production 261 00:14:15,160 --> 00:14:19,320 Speaker 1: of iHeartRadio and the Michael Dura podcast Network. Follow us 262 00:14:19,320 --> 00:14:22,480 Speaker 1: on Instagram at Michael Dura Podcasts and follow me Cheeky's 263 00:14:22,560 --> 00:14:25,320 Speaker 1: That's c h I q U i s. For more 264 00:14:25,360 --> 00:14:29,560 Speaker 1: podcasts from iHeart, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or 265 00:14:29,600 --> 00:14:31,760 Speaker 1: wherever you listen to your favorite podcast.