WEBVTT - Self-Actualization and Self-Preservation 0:00:11.880 --> 0:00:15.480 Greetings and welcome to Woke a f with me Danielle Moody. 0:00:15.640 --> 0:00:18.520 As you may already know from my social media platforms 0:00:18.720 --> 0:00:21.400 at D two cents or from listening to previous woke 0:00:21.440 --> 0:00:24.440 AF episodes, I want to bring you conversations that give 0:00:24.480 --> 0:00:27.360 you the tools to embody wokeness in all aspects of 0:00:27.400 --> 0:00:30.760 your life. This week, I'm bringing you insightful taste from 0:00:30.760 --> 0:00:34.520 amazing conversations that I had with two inspiring black women 0:00:34.680 --> 0:00:37.080 on Monday's edition of woke AF Daily, which you can 0:00:37.120 --> 0:00:40.280 hear right now at patreon dot com slash woke AF. 0:00:40.640 --> 0:00:44.559 I shared my full conversation with Black entertainment lawyer extraordinaire 0:00:44.920 --> 0:00:47.960 Marcy Cleary. Take a listen to her valuable insight into 0:00:48.000 --> 0:00:50.920 how black creators can get their work off the ground 0:00:51.000 --> 0:00:53.840 and protect their ownership of it while still sharing their 0:00:53.920 --> 0:01:00.240 vision with peers and mentors. What advice, Marcy, do you 0:01:00.320 --> 0:01:03.880 have for people that are are ready to take a risk, 0:01:04.200 --> 0:01:07.959 that are ready to you know they have a great idea, 0:01:08.200 --> 0:01:10.280 and you know a part of them is just like, 0:01:10.440 --> 0:01:12.960 do I pitch this idea? I'm scared because I don't 0:01:13.000 --> 0:01:14.920 want it. I don't want to get it stolen right, 0:01:15.200 --> 0:01:18.840 but they're ready for the risk. How would you explain 0:01:18.920 --> 0:01:23.120 to them how they begin to navigate this massive industry. No, 0:01:23.280 --> 0:01:26.000 that's a great question because everybody asks it, like because 0:01:26.000 --> 0:01:28.880 everybody's nervous because that's their baby, right to put their 0:01:28.920 --> 0:01:32.200 baby out in the world, and somebody not kidnap, kidnap 0:01:32.240 --> 0:01:36.320 the baby, right, right. I would say basic rules is 0:01:36.440 --> 0:01:39.600 if you have a finished script, like a full script, 0:01:39.760 --> 0:01:43.400 copywriter registered with the copyright Office before you send it out, 0:01:44.160 --> 0:01:48.160 you can protect it's the unique it's the expression of 0:01:48.200 --> 0:01:51.320 a unique idea. So the expression is I'm saying you 0:01:51.360 --> 0:01:53.520 got a full script, like something written out, like you 0:01:53.560 --> 0:01:56.360 don't just have a notepath that says, oh, we have 0:01:56.520 --> 0:02:01.080 this character Danyale in Brooklyn. That's not protectable, right, it's 0:02:01.120 --> 0:02:04.240 not unique and it's not fully thought out. But if 0:02:04.280 --> 0:02:07.640 you have a whole twenty page, thirty page, forty page 0:02:07.680 --> 0:02:11.119 script about Danielle in Brooklyn, Okay, you got here ideas there. 0:02:11.360 --> 0:02:13.919 So I always say, if you have a script, will 0:02:13.960 --> 0:02:17.240 copy richiar with Copyright Office. It costs maybe sixty five 0:02:17.280 --> 0:02:21.520 dollars to do so, right, that's easy. But don't go 0:02:21.560 --> 0:02:25.959 around having people sign in DA's non disclosure agreements before 0:02:26.000 --> 0:02:28.760 you send it. That's a turn off. So some folks 0:02:28.760 --> 0:02:31.560 will say, oh, well before you review it, can you 0:02:31.600 --> 0:02:35.400 please sign this nondisclosure. Well, I'm not gonna tell Oprah 0:02:35.440 --> 0:02:39.079 she can't look at my script before she signed something. Right, 0:02:39.160 --> 0:02:40.959 that's a place. Right. So you also just got to 0:02:41.000 --> 0:02:43.520 trust who you're sharing your material with, right, and know 0:02:43.720 --> 0:02:46.200 that that person is not gonna take the risk. Right, Like, 0:02:46.240 --> 0:02:49.040 if you sharing yourself with somebody you scare gonna take 0:02:49.160 --> 0:02:51.079 you know it's gonna show up on television next year, 0:02:51.160 --> 0:02:54.640 then that's not the person. Yeah, it's somebody you gotta trust. 0:02:55.880 --> 0:02:58.440 But the basis of its copyrighted, Have it written down, 0:02:58.520 --> 0:03:01.000 have it is thought out as possile before you share. 0:03:01.000 --> 0:03:04.320 Because it's easy to just take a sketch idea. Anybody 0:03:04.360 --> 0:03:07.519 can have a similar idea and make it better. And 0:03:07.919 --> 0:03:10.200 it's I don't know how to protect you man, got it? 0:03:10.440 --> 0:03:13.360 Got it? No, that's really important. I think that you know, 0:03:13.600 --> 0:03:15.760 you hear all of these horror stories and then you 0:03:15.840 --> 0:03:18.520 have people that are like, well I'm just gonna you know, 0:03:18.560 --> 0:03:20.400 I'm gonna take the risk, or they're gonna sit on 0:03:20.440 --> 0:03:23.680 something that's great because they're afraid. Yeah, and so I 0:03:23.720 --> 0:03:27.839 think that there's this this part of needing to let 0:03:27.880 --> 0:03:31.440 go of fear. Really, like, this really is in the industry, right, 0:03:31.840 --> 0:03:34.840 It's not the industry for fear and fear of rejection too. 0:03:35.080 --> 0:03:38.160 That's a huge one, you know, Like I would say, 0:03:38.160 --> 0:03:40.440 my clients are tougher than I am because you're gonna 0:03:40.560 --> 0:03:45.040 hear no fifty thousand times before you get that one yes, 0:03:45.200 --> 0:03:47.839 and all you need is a one yes. But you're 0:03:47.880 --> 0:03:50.560 gonna have to tweak it a lot. Everybody's gonna give 0:03:50.560 --> 0:03:53.400 you notes, you know, like for a long time before 0:03:53.400 --> 0:03:58.360 it becomes great. But that's art. Yeah. Well, Marci, you 0:03:58.400 --> 0:04:03.920 are champion in a whole field of black content creators. 0:04:03.920 --> 0:04:07.360 And I pray that this is not just a moment, 0:04:07.560 --> 0:04:10.640 as I say, but it is a movement of you know, 0:04:11.000 --> 0:04:14.600 us changing this industry from all different aspects of it 0:04:14.680 --> 0:04:17.680 because I feel like when we own things, you know, 0:04:17.880 --> 0:04:21.359 then we create the path that other folks can follow. 0:04:21.880 --> 0:04:25.800 You know what else is crucial, Danielle is sharing information. Right. 0:04:26.360 --> 0:04:30.320 I can't tell you the reason why other folks have 0:04:30.320 --> 0:04:32.599 had a jump in this industry is because they talk 0:04:32.640 --> 0:04:35.280 to each other, right, Like they tell each other they 0:04:35.320 --> 0:04:37.520 have role models of like this is what you do, 0:04:37.600 --> 0:04:41.479 this is what you don't do. Right, So I would say, like, 0:04:41.680 --> 0:04:44.760 you know, it's great, everybody's building, era's getting their deals, 0:04:44.920 --> 0:04:47.600 but you gotta talk to each other and say, you know, 0:04:47.800 --> 0:04:51.560 are you agreeing to this much like this amount of money? Okay? 0:04:51.720 --> 0:04:55.640 Like share information. Don't be so private and it's hard 0:04:55.680 --> 0:04:58.280 because you know you win, and you don't want to 0:04:58.279 --> 0:05:01.000 tell people about the losses as openly as you talk 0:05:01.080 --> 0:05:03.920 about the winds. But that's just as important because that's 0:05:03.920 --> 0:05:06.320 how we build, that's how we learn, right, and that's 0:05:06.320 --> 0:05:08.839 how we grow. And I think that's also is what 0:05:08.960 --> 0:05:11.839 creates the sustainability. That's why I have in the Macros 0:05:11.880 --> 0:05:14.480 and the Spree Hills is so important because they're sharing 0:05:14.600 --> 0:05:20.080 information amongst a community. So that's crucial too. It is crucial. 0:05:20.720 --> 0:05:23.839 Marcy Cleary, I'm so happy that you came on woke 0:05:24.080 --> 0:05:27.440 f to talk to us about this new world. It's 0:05:27.480 --> 0:05:29.560 not it's not new, but I think that I think 0:05:29.560 --> 0:05:33.120 what it's new and exciting about it is that I 0:05:33.240 --> 0:05:36.760 just want to see more beautiful black stars. That's what 0:05:36.839 --> 0:05:39.000 I want to see. I want to see. I want 0:05:39.040 --> 0:05:41.240 to see as EASTERI said, I want to see us win, 0:05:42.160 --> 0:05:45.160 and it's wonderful to know that we are. There are 0:05:45.200 --> 0:05:49.360 people like yourself who have our back right and then 0:05:49.440 --> 0:05:52.400 can usher us through. Thank you so much for coming 0:05:52.440 --> 0:06:02.280 on woke f appreciate you. Thank you. Whatever our role 0:06:02.480 --> 0:06:06.080 is on this earth, be it creating, leading, serving, we 0:06:06.120 --> 0:06:08.760 all need to make spaces in our lives for ritual 0:06:08.839 --> 0:06:11.920 and self preservation. I was so happy in honor to 0:06:12.000 --> 0:06:15.560 be joined by my spiritual big sister ricikat Okay Day 0:06:15.760 --> 0:06:18.560 on this week's Feel Good Friday edition of Woke af 0:06:18.720 --> 0:06:22.360 Daily to tell us what self preservation and ritual really mean, 0:06:22.560 --> 0:06:25.520 how they're different from what we call self care and habits, 0:06:25.640 --> 0:06:27.920 and how we can put them into practice in our 0:06:27.960 --> 0:06:34.120 everyday lives. What have you noticed over the past year 0:06:34.480 --> 0:06:39.400 receive as we are moving through this multiple pandemics, right, 0:06:39.400 --> 0:06:43.040 we're moving through and kind of trying to figure out 0:06:43.080 --> 0:06:47.800 how to manifest ourselves in this new normal space, and 0:06:47.839 --> 0:06:50.159 so what have you found in terms of the way 0:06:50.160 --> 0:06:53.320 that people are trying to connect and trying to ground 0:06:53.480 --> 0:06:58.920 with themselves. So the big thing is that a lot 0:06:58.960 --> 0:07:01.760 of people I haven't been doing it, don't know how 0:07:01.800 --> 0:07:04.599 to do it because our life you know, pre COVID 0:07:05.000 --> 0:07:07.520 was go go, go, go, go, go go. And so 0:07:08.279 --> 0:07:11.480 while yeah, I make tea blends and you know, I 0:07:11.560 --> 0:07:15.080 like candles, and you know, I'm do full moon and 0:07:15.240 --> 0:07:17.840 New Moon rituals. That was there was there was a 0:07:17.880 --> 0:07:19.680 part of my life that was that was a very 0:07:19.680 --> 0:07:22.760 small group of people that um kind of operated in 0:07:22.760 --> 0:07:26.720 that space naturally. And when the pandemic hit and folks 0:07:26.760 --> 0:07:30.679 were forced to sort of sit still, you start asking 0:07:30.760 --> 0:07:32.480 questions like, well, what the hell am I doing here 0:07:32.520 --> 0:07:36.760 and why is this happening? And in order to address, like, 0:07:36.840 --> 0:07:38.240 you know, a lot, I had a lot of friends 0:07:38.280 --> 0:07:40.440 that I you know, had to talk off the tree 0:07:40.560 --> 0:07:42.400 I call it, to prefer a real tree where I'm 0:07:42.440 --> 0:07:44.000 literally at the basis tree like all right, come on, 0:07:44.040 --> 0:07:46.080 you can come down now, not know and it's like no, 0:07:46.160 --> 0:07:48.320 but you can really come down. It's okay. What happens 0:07:48.440 --> 0:07:51.760 is that when you were forced to sit with yourself, 0:07:51.760 --> 0:07:54.200 you were forced to face things. And what you find 0:07:54.320 --> 0:07:56.600 is that a lot of us, myself included, had not 0:07:56.720 --> 0:07:58.800 been doing our due diligence when it came to our 0:07:58.840 --> 0:08:01.960 self preservation. And don't I don't like the term self 0:08:02.000 --> 0:08:04.040 care because it can you know, for a lot of people, 0:08:04.440 --> 0:08:06.400 visions of spa days and getting your nails done and 0:08:06.440 --> 0:08:09.520 backrubs come in and that's not really what self care 0:08:09.600 --> 0:08:12.960 is about. It really is asking you to preserve the self. 0:08:13.080 --> 0:08:16.200 And that looks like you know, meditation for others. That 0:08:16.320 --> 0:08:19.960 looks like you know, turning off Twitter for some And 0:08:20.440 --> 0:08:24.520 we initially are so wedded to our technology because that's 0:08:24.520 --> 0:08:26.120 the only way for us to stay in touch that 0:08:26.200 --> 0:08:28.400 I think a lot of people just want into overdrive. 0:08:28.840 --> 0:08:30.520 And then at some point when you realize this was 0:08:30.600 --> 0:08:33.839 not going to end quietly and quickly, and as more 0:08:33.920 --> 0:08:36.280 things started to get canceled, you start to see people 0:08:36.360 --> 0:08:39.840 really start delving in too, like you have to find 0:08:39.880 --> 0:08:41.640 some balance, You have to figure out how your life 0:08:41.679 --> 0:08:43.720 is going to look because you can't go outside and 0:08:43.760 --> 0:08:46.760 you can't you know, socialize, and people start finding ways 0:08:47.040 --> 0:08:50.760 to manage. But they also start to realize that in 0:08:50.880 --> 0:08:55.320 the absence of constant motion, that their lives, if they 0:08:55.360 --> 0:08:59.040 allow it, are actually more enriched in the staying still 0:08:59.640 --> 0:09:02.720 and sort of not having there because part of the 0:09:02.840 --> 0:09:05.760 going going on is the expectation that somebody's looking for you, 0:09:06.679 --> 0:09:09.839 or the idea that you that's a that's proof of 0:09:09.880 --> 0:09:13.280 your hustle or proof that you're making moves because you're going, going, going. 0:09:13.640 --> 0:09:17.120 For some it's a way to fill the void. And 0:09:17.160 --> 0:09:20.439 so when all of that goes away and you're kind 0:09:20.440 --> 0:09:22.840 of forced to sit, you start to really think deep 0:09:22.880 --> 0:09:26.280 and ask questions. And there's only so much netflix benching 0:09:26.280 --> 0:09:28.080 that you can do. There's only so much you know, 0:09:28.320 --> 0:09:31.839 you know, pandemic eating that you can do before you're like, okay, well, 0:09:31.840 --> 0:09:33.960 what exactly what does my life look like now? And 0:09:34.000 --> 0:09:37.040 I think a lot of us are finding that previous, 0:09:37.320 --> 0:09:40.240 pre pandemic, we were doing a ship job of taking 0:09:40.240 --> 0:09:44.000 care of ourselves. And now that you have no choice 0:09:44.040 --> 0:09:46.320 because it's just you and your kids, or you and 0:09:46.360 --> 0:09:49.719 your family or whoever's in your household, if you want 0:09:49.760 --> 0:09:51.439 to be here when it's all said and done, then 0:09:51.679 --> 0:09:54.360 self care, self preservation becomes a natural part of this. 0:09:54.760 --> 0:09:57.120 And folks are finding that they actually like it. Like 0:09:57.200 --> 0:09:59.960 a lot of folks that I'm talking to, they don't 0:10:00.200 --> 0:10:02.680 trying to go back to whatever was normal before. They 0:10:02.720 --> 0:10:06.960 really want They like getting up and working from you know, 0:10:07.080 --> 0:10:09.600 working from a place that is not the office. They 0:10:09.679 --> 0:10:13.000 like you know, taking their time, you know, they like 0:10:13.679 --> 0:10:16.520 the idea of setting boundaries because COVID has taught us 0:10:16.520 --> 0:10:19.280 a set boundary. So I'm not taking meetings after six pm, 0:10:19.440 --> 0:10:22.320 or I'm not you know, taking meetings at eight o'clock 0:10:22.320 --> 0:10:24.120 of the morning or whatever it is that you're doing. 0:10:24.520 --> 0:10:27.840 And people are like, yo, this way of living is 0:10:27.840 --> 0:10:31.840 not ideal because we didn't expect it. But it's teaching 0:10:31.920 --> 0:10:34.360 us all some things. And one of the big lessons 0:10:34.440 --> 0:10:37.000 is that the life, the way we were living before 0:10:37.720 --> 0:10:40.559 was just it was insane. It was absolutely insane, and 0:10:40.640 --> 0:10:44.920 that was considered normal. Tell us about ritual and why 0:10:45.000 --> 0:10:48.440 that's important for how we develop and show up in 0:10:48.480 --> 0:10:51.800 the world. So for me, ritual is something you do 0:10:51.880 --> 0:10:53.920 with intention. There are a lot of things we do 0:10:53.960 --> 0:10:57.600 out of habit, and you know, the issue with habit 0:10:57.679 --> 0:10:59.600 is that there's no thought to it. It's just something 0:10:59.640 --> 0:11:03.120 that you So it becomes easy over time to not 0:11:03.240 --> 0:11:06.400 realize that you're doing it, or to not realize that 0:11:06.440 --> 0:11:08.360 you might be harming people and doing it because it's 0:11:08.360 --> 0:11:09.760 just like if you have people say, well, that's just 0:11:09.800 --> 0:11:13.080 the way we've always done it. For me, ritual is 0:11:13.160 --> 0:11:16.280 really about being intentional, and I think anything can be 0:11:16.360 --> 0:11:18.800 ritualized if you take a minute to think about what 0:11:18.840 --> 0:11:21.280 it is that you're doing. So when you get into 0:11:21.280 --> 0:11:23.680 a space where ritual is sort of how you leave 0:11:23.840 --> 0:11:27.720 your day, what ends up happening is you prepare yourself. 0:11:28.040 --> 0:11:30.520 And some of us, let's be honest, we live in spaces, 0:11:30.559 --> 0:11:33.800 We operate in spaces. Our soul contracts require us to 0:11:33.840 --> 0:11:37.720 be in service. You are in service, and so those 0:11:37.720 --> 0:11:40.080 of us who are born to be in service and 0:11:40.120 --> 0:11:45.600 to lead as servant leaders, oftentimes we don't have caretakers. 0:11:45.400 --> 0:11:49.160 It's just it's this weird thing. But what happens is 0:11:49.200 --> 0:11:51.840 that you have been given certain amount of knowledge and 0:11:51.920 --> 0:11:54.400 you are surrounded by people who can show you how 0:11:54.440 --> 0:11:57.560 to care for yourself. And when you remove the sort 0:11:57.600 --> 0:11:59.400 of human aspect of oh, well, what I want to 0:11:59.400 --> 0:12:01.000 want to take care of me? Yes, we would all 0:12:01.040 --> 0:12:03.320 love that. But in order for you to do your job, 0:12:03.360 --> 0:12:05.360 in order for you to do what you came to do, 0:12:05.400 --> 0:12:07.679 you have to be fully charged. That means that you 0:12:07.720 --> 0:12:09.720 have to be intentional about what you put in your body. 0:12:09.920 --> 0:12:11.880 You have to be intentional about the colors that you 0:12:11.960 --> 0:12:14.400 might wear that day, or intentional about you know, who 0:12:14.440 --> 0:12:16.800 you talk to that day. Just because if your goal 0:12:16.880 --> 0:12:18.920 is to get this information out and you know that 0:12:18.920 --> 0:12:22.160 there's going to be very little reciprocity. Then that means 0:12:22.160 --> 0:12:23.880 you charge up and you go out into the world 0:12:23.960 --> 0:12:27.600 protected and you can sustain yourself. It's so easy to 0:12:27.600 --> 0:12:30.920 fall off the cliff. Like that's the thing about ritual 0:12:30.920 --> 0:12:33.720 and it's about about you know, sort of self preservation. 0:12:34.280 --> 0:12:37.959 It is amazing. It is much harder to get back 0:12:38.040 --> 0:12:40.679 off the cliff than it is to get you know 0:12:40.720 --> 0:12:43.080 what I'm saying. When you fall off that cliff, if 0:12:43.120 --> 0:12:46.920 you don't catch it and recalibrate immediately, it is so 0:12:47.040 --> 0:12:49.040 much harder to get back up there. Like for all 0:12:49.080 --> 0:12:51.600 of that momentum that you build the minute you fall off, 0:12:52.000 --> 0:12:54.440 it's such a hard place to get back from. So 0:12:54.760 --> 0:12:56.720 that's the part, you know. I remember I would have 0:12:56.760 --> 0:12:58.520 clients who would you know, I would work with and 0:12:58.520 --> 0:13:01.440 we would put blends together, and that would say, if 0:13:01.440 --> 0:13:05.040 this works, don't let it run out, because once it 0:13:05.120 --> 0:13:07.360 runs out and you've gone two or three weeks without it, 0:13:07.559 --> 0:13:09.280 we're gonna have to go through a whole process to 0:13:09.320 --> 0:13:12.560 get you back and sink. And those that listened fared well, 0:13:12.600 --> 0:13:16.160 and those that didn't. You know, here we are so 0:13:16.280 --> 0:13:19.160 It is important that you recognize them as rituals and 0:13:19.200 --> 0:13:22.080 you recognize them as intentions, and that you know you 0:13:22.120 --> 0:13:24.000 have people around you be like, hey, did you did 0:13:24.000 --> 0:13:26.120 you do? Did you drink or smoothe today? You seem 0:13:26.160 --> 0:13:28.720 a little on edge because it's easy, right all right, 0:13:28.760 --> 0:13:32.520 back off? Yeah, Accountability partners is also a big part 0:13:32.600 --> 0:13:35.120 of how we take care of each other. Everybody can't 0:13:35.160 --> 0:13:37.360 maybe everyone can't take care of you, but people can 0:13:37.400 --> 0:13:39.920 ask did you drink water? Did you eat today? You know? 0:13:39.960 --> 0:13:42.080 Have you you know, have you gone outside? You know 0:13:42.240 --> 0:13:44.920 you're taken a stop for a minute and done some 0:13:45.000 --> 0:13:47.800 deep breathing. And that is just as that is just 0:13:47.840 --> 0:13:50.560 as critical I think we're not We can't do it 0:13:50.600 --> 0:13:53.719 by ourselves, like we definitely need our village to help us. 0:14:00.120 --> 0:14:02.280 I tell you I could have talked to Risikat for 0:14:02.320 --> 0:14:04.920 a full hour about all the ways we can preserve 0:14:05.000 --> 0:14:08.560 and enrich our lives in this unprecedented moment. If you 0:14:08.600 --> 0:14:10.959 want to hear more of her knowledge and insight, check 0:14:11.000 --> 0:14:14.600 out our full forty minute conversation at patreon dot com. 0:14:14.679 --> 0:14:18.160 Slash woke af as always, five dollars a month gets 0:14:18.160 --> 0:14:21.200 you five full one hour shows every week. And I 0:14:21.240 --> 0:14:24.160 have some great conversations coming up that I'm so excited 0:14:24.200 --> 0:14:26.360 to share with all of you, So head over now 0:14:26.400 --> 0:14:28.800 and subscribe so you don't miss any of the wokeness 0:14:28.800 --> 0:14:31.560 that I'm dishing out until then, Power to the people 0:14:31.640 --> 0:14:34.600 and to all the people. Power, get woke, and stay 0:14:34.840 --> 0:14:35.560 woke as fuck.