WEBVTT - Ninja, Please!: Motherf*ckin Mini Episode 0:00:03.360 --> 0:00:10.120 Motherfucking mini episode, mini episode. Motherfucking mini ever. 0:00:10.080 --> 0:00:17.720 Sew baby, turn around and let me see that sexy body. 0:00:17.800 --> 0:00:21.920 Go bump, bump, bump. There it is Gentiles and little 0:00:21.960 --> 0:00:26.640 mamas alike. Welcome to another phenomenal episode of My Mama Told. 0:00:26.440 --> 0:00:29.600 Me, the podcast that dives deep into the pockets of 0:00:29.680 --> 0:00:31.680 black conspiracy theories. 0:00:31.400 --> 0:00:35.479 And we finally work to prove the theories that you the 0:00:35.640 --> 0:00:40.480 listener have at home. It's a motherfucking mini episode. Welcome everyone. 0:00:40.640 --> 0:00:44.800 I'm German, I'm David boy. My apartment stuns like sneak. 0:00:45.080 --> 0:00:47.880 Your apartment smells like steak, but that doesn't get picked 0:00:47.960 --> 0:00:50.519 up on the podcast. That wasn't even something you had 0:00:50.560 --> 0:00:53.040 to tell everybody running back. 0:00:57.280 --> 0:01:03.000 Let's just start the whole I'll tell you one thing 0:01:03.000 --> 0:01:06.839 about me. My apartment don't smell like steak. Yeah yeah, hey, 0:01:06.920 --> 0:01:08.399 well at least something you know. 0:01:08.480 --> 0:01:09.160 I'm not broke. 0:01:11.720 --> 0:01:13.360 It don't smell like fish for lake. 0:01:13.720 --> 0:01:16.400 Yeah yeah, it don't smell like nuggets in here fucking 0:01:16.640 --> 0:01:18.080 Costco Prime. 0:01:17.880 --> 0:01:20.880 Baby, and I smell like fried baloney as steak. 0:01:21.000 --> 0:01:24.399 Bitch is steaky here, bro I get all my meats, 0:01:26.000 --> 0:01:26.840 shouts to Costco. 0:01:26.880 --> 0:01:29.640 Good meeting, I don't know if that's a rich person's 0:01:30.200 --> 0:01:31.600 instinct with with meat. 0:01:31.720 --> 0:01:33.600 But yeah, are you not a costcomer? 0:01:33.959 --> 0:01:36.280 I am not a costco member. No, but what I 0:01:36.360 --> 0:01:40.480 aspire to be. I don't shame anyone who has that 0:01:40.480 --> 0:01:41.920 that sweet opportunity. 0:01:42.560 --> 0:01:45.440 It's it's not a fucking college degree. You could just 0:01:45.440 --> 0:01:47.600 go to Burbank and get one. 0:01:47.920 --> 0:01:53.480 Yeah, I think I think the Burbank is a big, 0:01:53.720 --> 0:01:57.000 a big factor for me. Pretty I'm pretty far from that. 0:01:57.120 --> 0:02:00.720 And it's just, you know, the idea of needing to 0:02:00.760 --> 0:02:03.800 go all the way out there to shop feels super removed. 0:02:03.800 --> 0:02:05.960 So no, I'm not. But I mean the thing is 0:02:05.960 --> 0:02:08.040 you only have to go once every six weeks. 0:02:08.560 --> 0:02:11.959 Yeah, no, six weeks is it's it comes up fast 0:02:12.000 --> 0:02:15.280 for us at this house. All right, all right, kid 0:02:15.400 --> 0:02:19.280 changes things. Man, You really, that's what I hear? You really? 0:02:19.639 --> 0:02:22.639 You think people sound like fucking idiots when you go 0:02:22.720 --> 0:02:25.200 when you hear them talk about like their lives after 0:02:25.240 --> 0:02:28.120 their kids, and you go, bitch, it can't be that hard, 0:02:28.200 --> 0:02:30.680 And then you're doing it and you're like, it's kind 0:02:30.680 --> 0:02:31.040 of hard. 0:02:31.680 --> 0:02:34.600 I Mean, here's the thing about me is I don't 0:02:34.639 --> 0:02:38.720 particularly want a job that never stops okay, and that's 0:02:38.760 --> 0:02:44.200 what like, that's like shit could happen to them when 0:02:44.200 --> 0:02:47.200 they're sleeping, Like, come on, man, I need to I 0:02:47.200 --> 0:02:48.680 need to leave the office every now. 0:02:48.880 --> 0:02:52.200 Yeah, I get you. You need to do not disturb 0:02:52.880 --> 0:02:54.079 on your phone a little bit. 0:02:54.200 --> 0:02:55.520 Yeah, I need some daddy time. 0:02:56.120 --> 0:02:58.760 I got you, not just father time. 0:02:58.840 --> 0:03:00.840 You need big pop a time. 0:03:01.000 --> 0:03:01.480 I got you. 0:03:01.960 --> 0:03:04.320 Whatever I do with my personal life, it's their business. 0:03:04.440 --> 0:03:06.920 It's none of your goddamn business. And I say that 0:03:06.960 --> 0:03:10.360 to my daughter, but she don't listen. She she seems 0:03:10.360 --> 0:03:13.840 pretty intent on being very much in my business for 0:03:13.880 --> 0:03:14.480 the rest. 0:03:14.240 --> 0:03:17.080 Of my life. Damn. In the mix, in the mix, 0:03:17.240 --> 0:03:19.079 don't you want a day where you could just sleep? 0:03:20.280 --> 0:03:27.280 David? Yes, what is this line of questioning? Absolutely I do. 0:03:29.520 --> 0:03:35.960 I dream about it constantly, But I built a bond 0:03:36.240 --> 0:03:39.440 that I can't untether, So no, it doesn't. I don't 0:03:39.480 --> 0:03:41.800 get that anymore. And I have to make peace with that. 0:03:42.360 --> 0:03:43.760 Man. Your life is hard, bro. 0:03:44.120 --> 0:03:47.120 Yeah, no, it's you know, it's not ideal all the time. 0:03:47.160 --> 0:03:49.280 But it could be me over here making. 0:03:49.000 --> 0:03:52.400 Steaks, making stinky steaks. 0:03:52.920 --> 0:03:55.680 It's not it's not sticky, it's just like not a smell. 0:03:55.720 --> 0:03:57.960 You want wingering. 0:03:57.760 --> 0:04:00.800 Not a constant smell. You need an your house. 0:04:00.760 --> 0:04:02.640 Like you don't want to wake up to it. You 0:04:02.760 --> 0:04:04.800 know what I mean? I got you, that's the problem. 0:04:05.080 --> 0:04:05.320 Yeah. 0:04:05.360 --> 0:04:07.120 Anyways, we got an email. We don't need to talk 0:04:07.120 --> 0:04:07.600 about stake. 0:04:07.640 --> 0:04:10.000 So we got an email, an email from a person 0:04:10.080 --> 0:04:14.400 who you I feel. I haven't read the email, but 0:04:14.520 --> 0:04:18.760 you have. And you couldn't have been more excited about 0:04:19.000 --> 0:04:22.560 this individual and their contributions to our emails. 0:04:22.839 --> 0:04:31.640 I this guy might be Carlos esque, okay, in his fervor, 0:04:32.640 --> 0:04:41.400 in passion and devotion. This guy, man, this is crazy. 0:04:41.560 --> 0:04:44.280 I'll read it and then you can. Yeah, you'll you'll 0:04:44.320 --> 0:04:44.720 feel it. 0:04:44.800 --> 0:04:47.280 Well, I will say before we even get started. We're 0:04:47.320 --> 0:04:51.400 always looking for new enemies, and it sounds like we 0:04:51.480 --> 0:04:54.760 may have earned ourselves one via the podcast. 0:04:54.800 --> 0:04:56.920 So no, I think this guy's on our side. He's 0:04:57.000 --> 0:04:59.960 just crazy, okay's also what we're looking for. 0:05:00.320 --> 0:05:03.320 He's Dennis Rodman on the on the ninety seven Bulls 0:05:03.360 --> 0:05:03.600 kind of. 0:05:03.720 --> 0:05:06.560 He might marry Madonna, he might marry himself, might be 0:05:06.760 --> 0:05:09.320 up an addressed like, oh this is exciting, man. Yeah, 0:05:09.360 --> 0:05:12.000 I'm really I'm really happy for this. Let's jump in 0:05:12.360 --> 0:05:14.760 all right. This is from he doesn't say. He doesn't 0:05:14.760 --> 0:05:16.320 want us to say his name, so I'm just gonna 0:05:16.360 --> 0:05:19.040 say it. I also don't think he's involved in the 0:05:19.080 --> 0:05:21.440 world where we can't say this is from Jay Shan. 0:05:23.160 --> 0:05:24.520 We don't under say his last night. 0:05:24.760 --> 0:05:27.120 All right. That was my father justin cut that out, 0:05:27.960 --> 0:05:30.560 all right, Just for the record, for all Chinese listeners 0:05:30.560 --> 0:05:34.040 out there, we love you all here at my mama 0:05:34.160 --> 0:05:38.040 told me the reviews of Jay Sean do not reflect 0:05:38.040 --> 0:05:40.800 the views of like Snon David. In fact, we don't 0:05:40.800 --> 0:05:45.240 know this nigga. He's clearly crazy. Okay. The title of 0:05:45.279 --> 0:05:53.680 the email is watch your pops here we go. No punctuation, by. 0:05:53.600 --> 0:05:57.600 The way, not not a single period or comma throughout 0:05:57.600 --> 0:05:59.919 this whole thing. I would say, there's there's. 0:05:59.720 --> 0:06:08.359 Some capitals though, all right, all right, yeah, I was 0:06:08.440 --> 0:06:10.760 just listening and one of y'all said, your pops is white. 0:06:11.000 --> 0:06:13.800 Hold on, can we talk about how insane it is 0:06:13.839 --> 0:06:17.000 to start an email with Yeah, I was just listening. 0:06:17.480 --> 0:06:23.760 No greeting, no no uh, no pleasantries, just immediately in 0:06:23.800 --> 0:06:26.720 the middle of a sentence. But go ahead, yeah, okay. 0:06:26.600 --> 0:06:28.599 All right, yeah, I was just listening and one of 0:06:28.640 --> 0:06:30.839 y'all said, your pops is white. Yo. I know that 0:06:30.920 --> 0:06:40.920 nigga probably cool and everything. Yeah, I met your fond 0:06:41.000 --> 0:06:43.640 cool guy. Yeah guy, But Yo, you might want to 0:06:43.720 --> 0:06:45.800 keep an eye on him because you never know, he 0:06:45.920 --> 0:06:47.960 might be hanging out with some other white people that 0:06:48.080 --> 0:06:50.560 he thinks is cool and they could be playing him 0:06:50.560 --> 0:06:53.279 and getting all kinds of info about you. The next 0:06:53.360 --> 0:06:55.400 thing you know, they all in your shit. 0:06:55.920 --> 0:07:04.920 WHOA. I had never considered the possibility my father my 0:07:05.080 --> 0:07:10.040 canoodle with other whites and that would be the potential 0:07:10.080 --> 0:07:11.000 to my downfall. 0:07:11.160 --> 0:07:13.480 It's also that he thinks your father would set you up. 0:07:13.760 --> 0:07:17.560 Yeah, my dad is just like weirdly bad mouthing me 0:07:17.800 --> 0:07:21.080 to other white people and they're rubbing their hands together 0:07:21.200 --> 0:07:23.560 like birdman, just waiting for the chance. 0:07:24.000 --> 0:07:27.280 Also that your dad could be tricked into, like you know, 0:07:27.720 --> 0:07:36.200 he's like, oh, were I'm sorry, that was cool? That was. 0:07:37.640 --> 0:07:40.280 I don't know, Jayshawn, I'm thirty six. I think it's 0:07:40.280 --> 0:07:44.600 my dad. I think my dad were gonna like snitch 0:07:44.680 --> 0:07:47.680 on me to the white community. He had an ampul 0:07:47.720 --> 0:07:49.280 opportunity up to this point. 0:07:49.600 --> 0:07:51.200 It would have been done in childhood. 0:07:51.200 --> 0:07:54.520 We're pretty far into the game. But I'm listening. I'm 0:07:54.560 --> 0:08:04.280 listening get ready for a tone shift. And that reminds 0:08:04.320 --> 0:08:07.080 me you can't trust them Chinese because. 0:08:06.760 --> 0:08:12.640 Either oh. 0:08:20.680 --> 0:08:24.440 You gotta you gotta be employed someday, Jay Sean. 0:08:24.240 --> 0:08:27.600 What are you doing? It's this special kind of racist 0:08:27.600 --> 0:08:30.000 guy who conflates white and Asian people. 0:08:30.480 --> 0:08:31.840 What fuck? 0:08:32.880 --> 0:08:33.280 All right? 0:08:34.640 --> 0:08:36.080 Let me some. 0:08:36.000 --> 0:08:40.320 People truly only see black white, right, like you ever 0:08:40.360 --> 0:08:42.319 mentionedbody like that where it's like, I don't think they 0:08:42.320 --> 0:08:43.920 are aware that there's like other. 0:08:44.320 --> 0:08:46.839 Yeah, that's true, where it's just like white and black 0:08:46.880 --> 0:08:50.280 and then and and I feel like what they always 0:08:50.320 --> 0:08:58.360 are is white, black, jew Chinese. I think I think 0:08:58.400 --> 0:09:01.280 those of the four categories. He is that that people 0:09:01.320 --> 0:09:05.640 with that intense racism tend to hold tight is white, black, 0:09:05.840 --> 0:09:10.920 jew never Jewish. It ain't Jewish people, it's jew Chinese. 0:09:11.720 --> 0:09:11.880 Uh. 0:09:13.080 --> 0:09:16.120 And I feel like Jayshawn is probably living in that 0:09:16.320 --> 0:09:18.400 deep seated level of racism. 0:09:18.559 --> 0:09:21.839 I also several family members. I got cousins who will 0:09:21.840 --> 0:09:24.079 tell you, if you're not born in Africa, you're not black. 0:09:25.679 --> 0:09:26.520 They say that to me. 0:09:30.160 --> 0:09:33.120 The most Africanized man that ever was. 0:09:33.440 --> 0:09:36.880 Their cousin not born in Africa black as all. Anyways, 0:09:36.880 --> 0:09:40.120 all right, you know what Chinese niggas sol karate from us. Right, 0:09:42.600 --> 0:09:44.600 my man kind of put me onto this, but I 0:09:44.640 --> 0:09:53.040 figured out most of it myself. We could tell he 0:09:53.120 --> 0:09:57.120 did his own research. Uh so, my main my man 0:09:57.160 --> 0:10:00.360 tells me about how these egypt niggas invented karate, but 0:10:00.440 --> 0:10:02.880 when they was warring with them Greek or Roman niggas, 0:10:03.080 --> 0:10:05.880 the Chinese niggas slid in there and stole all kinds 0:10:05.920 --> 0:10:08.679 of shit and took all the karate books. And then 0:10:08.720 --> 0:10:10.640 the karate teachers all died in the war. 0:10:10.960 --> 0:10:16.280 Whoa, So it was the books that we were learning 0:10:16.280 --> 0:10:18.160 the karate from. That that was the way that we 0:10:18.160 --> 0:10:21.160 were passing down the lineage of martial arts. 0:10:21.480 --> 0:10:25.000 I'm the books. I'm still with him, like people, man, listen, 0:10:25.040 --> 0:10:28.080 stolen people, steal culture during wars. 0:10:27.840 --> 0:10:30.120 Stolen artifacts is a very real thing. 0:10:30.520 --> 0:10:34.360 Come on. Our museums built on that. Most come on. 0:10:35.720 --> 0:10:39.000 So I start wondering why they invented karate. And I 0:10:39.080 --> 0:10:41.680 remember I watched the show one night about how these 0:10:41.679 --> 0:10:44.720 alien niggas was here and showed the egypt niggas and 0:10:44.760 --> 0:10:48.000 some other niggas in like South America or some shit, 0:10:48.440 --> 0:10:50.960 how to build pyramids. And this is some real shit 0:10:51.040 --> 0:10:57.480 you could look up. I don't remember the name of 0:10:57.480 --> 0:11:00.439 the planet, but it's called like Neibu or something like that, 0:11:00.800 --> 0:11:03.520 and every like three thousand years, it's close enough that 0:11:03.559 --> 0:11:06.120 the niggas that lived there can just pull up on us. 0:11:06.360 --> 0:11:10.480 So I started realizing these egypt niggas must have been, like, Yo, 0:11:10.600 --> 0:11:13.079 these niggas seem cool, but next time they come around, 0:11:13.080 --> 0:11:15.200 they might be on some different type of timing. And 0:11:15.240 --> 0:11:18.280 you gotta remember, they didn't have guns and bombs or 0:11:18.320 --> 0:11:20.560 none of that shit back then. They had like swords 0:11:20.559 --> 0:11:23.320 and shit. So they came up with karate just in 0:11:23.360 --> 0:11:26.600 case something popped off, they could give them that action. Okay, 0:11:27.400 --> 0:11:31.080 but them Chinese niggas stole it. They stole all that 0:11:31.120 --> 0:11:34.160 shit and been keeping it secret all these years. I 0:11:34.200 --> 0:11:39.880 think that's oh wow, wait wait, I think that's why 0:11:39.880 --> 0:11:40.640 they killed that nigga. 0:11:40.679 --> 0:11:49.760 Bruce Lee famously assassinated. 0:11:50.960 --> 0:11:53.240 That nigga. Bruce Lee was cool with black people's and 0:11:53.360 --> 0:11:56.640 was teaching them karate, but then he started teaching But then, 0:11:58.200 --> 0:12:01.120 but then he started teaching that basketball nigga. Kareem Abdul 0:12:01.160 --> 0:12:02.120 Jabbar karate. 0:12:03.720 --> 0:12:08.400 Can I just say how insane it is to both no. 0:12:08.600 --> 0:12:12.600 Kareem Abdul Jabbar's name and still refer to him as 0:12:12.720 --> 0:12:17.080 that basketball nigga. 0:12:18.040 --> 0:12:21.199 Okay, so then you started teaching that basketball nigga Kareem 0:12:21.200 --> 0:12:24.360 ab dul Jabbar karate. So them Chinese government niggas must 0:12:24.360 --> 0:12:26.920 have been like, yo, he fucking with a Muslim niggas. 0:12:26.960 --> 0:12:30.920 Now you know how they get down. So they had 0:12:30.920 --> 0:12:33.439 that nigga popped. I think they killed his son too, 0:12:33.520 --> 0:12:35.959 probably just to make sure he didn't try nothing if 0:12:36.000 --> 0:12:38.520 he found out how they did his pops. Imagine if 0:12:38.559 --> 0:12:42.079 these Chinese niggas never stole that shit and Phara Malcolmects 0:12:42.120 --> 0:12:45.120 and them niggas had that karate shit right out the gate, yo, 0:12:45.160 --> 0:12:46.679 shit would be different right about now. 0:12:47.200 --> 0:12:58.560 Damn, we're calling upon you because we have we have 0:12:58.679 --> 0:13:02.199 new merch. We have very exciting merch that we are 0:13:02.240 --> 0:13:05.680 now selling and it's it's fucking great. We love it 0:13:05.760 --> 0:13:06.200 so much. 0:13:06.320 --> 0:13:08.320 Just sleek, it's sexy. 0:13:08.880 --> 0:13:10.600 Come on, you want to tell them what we have? 0:13:10.800 --> 0:13:13.600 Yeah, we have three different types of hats, which is 0:13:13.640 --> 0:13:17.160 really fun. We have a two tone hat, an alien 0:13:17.240 --> 0:13:20.760 dad hat, the traditional logo in black and khaki. Then 0:13:20.800 --> 0:13:23.199 we have the enamel pin with an alien who has 0:13:23.240 --> 0:13:25.480 a cooofie on it. Since my mama told me. And 0:13:25.520 --> 0:13:28.320 then we have t shirts that say proud little Mama, 0:13:28.360 --> 0:13:29.320 which is who you are. 0:13:29.840 --> 0:13:32.400 Yeah, you can buy the merch now, go to my 0:13:32.559 --> 0:13:36.080 mama told me dot merch table dot com. It's a 0:13:36.120 --> 0:13:39.080 brand new name, but it's the same old merch and 0:13:39.080 --> 0:13:40.840 we would love for you to get some if you 0:13:40.920 --> 0:13:43.800 haven't got it already, and we want you to have 0:13:43.880 --> 0:13:45.440 all the sweet stuff, so get it. 0:13:48.280 --> 0:13:52.880 I honestly think jayshon Ford possibly the best email anyone's 0:13:52.880 --> 0:13:53.480 ever sent me. 0:13:53.880 --> 0:13:55.360 It's a high caliber email. 0:13:55.440 --> 0:13:58.720 It's like, if you're gonna, if you're gonna send us shit. 0:13:59.280 --> 0:14:01.080 We don't want to hear about how much you like 0:14:01.160 --> 0:14:03.679 the show. Yes, stop, you don't want to hear about 0:14:03.720 --> 0:14:05.200 how handsome you think we are. 0:14:05.400 --> 0:14:08.880 Stop trying to fuck us, Stop trying to butter us up. 0:14:09.280 --> 0:14:13.000 Get to the crazy, Get right to the fucking nutcase 0:14:13.240 --> 0:14:14.920 that's outside of You. 0:14:15.080 --> 0:14:23.840 Start out with us testing our familial bonds, and. 0:14:24.200 --> 0:14:26.520 You come in and you make me doubt whether or 0:14:26.600 --> 0:14:30.320 not my father is a terrorist, uh some sort of 0:14:30.400 --> 0:14:33.520 like spy, a co op of some kind, and then 0:14:33.720 --> 0:14:38.360 and psyop and then and then and then you transition 0:14:38.600 --> 0:14:44.040 into asking us to not trust entire races and ethnicities 0:14:44.040 --> 0:14:44.520 of people. 0:14:44.960 --> 0:14:47.720 By the way, no sign off that shit just ended. 0:14:48.160 --> 0:14:50.760 Yeah, No, he doesn't say goodbye, He doesn't say hello, 0:14:51.280 --> 0:14:54.360 he doesn't say goodbye. He starts in the middle of 0:14:54.400 --> 0:14:57.880 the sentence. And that sentence runs on for a page 0:14:57.920 --> 0:15:01.040 and a half and and all of it glorious. And 0:15:01.080 --> 0:15:03.120 he tells us a lot. He tells us that that 0:15:03.200 --> 0:15:13.920 the Egyptian niggas were the ones who invented karate. He 0:15:14.040 --> 0:15:17.600 tells us that that the only reason that Egyptians do 0:15:17.720 --> 0:15:20.920 not continue to practice karate is because it was stolen 0:15:21.120 --> 0:15:24.160 the literature, that sort of how's the karate was stolen 0:15:24.520 --> 0:15:28.200 and our greatest karate masters were murdered off. And then 0:15:28.240 --> 0:15:32.440 he goes on to say that Bruce Lee in fact, 0:15:32.760 --> 0:15:37.320 was going to gift karate back to the black community 0:15:37.360 --> 0:15:41.040 and specifically the most dangerous of blacks, the black Muslims, 0:15:41.440 --> 0:15:53.000 before he was quote unquote assassinated popped Una Pops for 0:15:53.240 --> 0:15:56.120 his decision to share with the Muslim community. 0:15:56.680 --> 0:15:59.560 So I just want to say, even though Jayshawn has 0:15:59.600 --> 0:16:04.400 brought us a bounty of ideas, some informed, some maybe 0:16:04.480 --> 0:16:08.560 not fully informed, we should clarify the origin of karate 0:16:08.760 --> 0:16:11.200 as we know it is a type of martial arts 0:16:11.560 --> 0:16:16.360 from Japan with some Chinese influence, But I mean, listen, 0:16:17.720 --> 0:16:21.520 I as a theory, I'm I'm I love it. I 0:16:21.600 --> 0:16:24.320 love it. I will I would love to go deeper 0:16:24.640 --> 0:16:27.120 because here's what this got me thinking. The way he 0:16:27.240 --> 0:16:30.280 was like, I just figured that shit out. I was like, yeah, 0:16:30.320 --> 0:16:32.520 you could just make up your world. 0:16:32.880 --> 0:16:36.000 It's a nice thing that I think we don't celebrate 0:16:36.120 --> 0:16:40.200 enough in conspiracy theory. I think, oftentimes, if we're gonna 0:16:40.240 --> 0:16:43.560 take this into a little bit more of a wide 0:16:43.680 --> 0:16:46.800 lens of what conspiracy theory is, and it's part of 0:16:46.840 --> 0:16:49.480 the root of what this what makes this show so fun. 0:16:50.040 --> 0:16:55.239 Oftentimes conspiracy theory gets treated like it's it's the terrors 0:16:55.280 --> 0:16:58.720 of the fringes of society, right that it's just the 0:16:58.800 --> 0:17:02.200 worst people making up the worst ideas, and they're bad 0:17:02.280 --> 0:17:04.399 for having done it, and we should be ashamed to 0:17:04.480 --> 0:17:07.200 allow them to do it. And I and I think 0:17:07.280 --> 0:17:11.480 you disagree. I think it sometimes can be the best 0:17:11.560 --> 0:17:14.920 thing that a human being has to offer is their 0:17:15.000 --> 0:17:20.359 psychotic musings on a subject they know absolutely nothing about. 0:17:21.119 --> 0:17:24.520 I honestly often would rather hear from that than experts. 0:17:25.320 --> 0:17:27.680 Come on, it's just so much more fun. 0:17:28.240 --> 0:17:31.280 You think I want to talk to some taekwondo master, No, 0:17:31.320 --> 0:17:32.600 I want to talk to Jean. 0:17:33.200 --> 0:17:36.119 I want Jay Jon to write a book about the 0:17:36.200 --> 0:17:37.640 ancient art of taekwondo. 0:17:38.880 --> 0:17:43.560 Here's yeah, here's what I'm thinking in my head. This 0:17:43.800 --> 0:17:48.040 is what I go down. Bruce Lee was foretold in 0:17:48.080 --> 0:17:51.800 a prophecy, and now we're waiting on the true karate Messiah. 0:17:53.359 --> 0:17:56.600 That's what I wanted to be. Okay, I like it 0:17:56.680 --> 0:17:59.720 back for us to teach his people karate and through 0:18:00.800 --> 0:18:03.639 we will liberate because we had, we've Black people have 0:18:03.720 --> 0:18:07.639 always had flirtations with karate. We love karate, we love karate. 0:18:07.640 --> 0:18:09.679 I have a joke about we love karate, we. 0:18:09.800 --> 0:18:12.720 Love them about some of the greatest drug dealers of 0:18:13.680 --> 0:18:17.719 New York name themselves Wu Tang just because they liked 0:18:17.840 --> 0:18:19.760 watching karate films too much. 0:18:21.840 --> 0:18:28.119 I would argue, there's no such thing as too much. So, like, 0:18:28.560 --> 0:18:31.480 where does that love of karate come from? It? It 0:18:31.520 --> 0:18:33.920 would make sense that it's instilled in us on a 0:18:34.040 --> 0:18:36.800 genetic level from the ancient time. 0:18:37.160 --> 0:18:40.240 Right, And if if I want to play this game, 0:18:40.440 --> 0:18:44.800 if we think about what hieroglyphics are, they're always in 0:18:45.040 --> 0:18:49.400 poses that do sort of look a little bit like karate. 0:18:50.080 --> 0:18:52.680 It's a lot of this and a lot of it's 0:18:52.760 --> 0:18:57.000 a lot of karate chops in those hieroglyphic pro poses, 0:18:57.480 --> 0:19:00.000 and we've been presuming that they're running or they're made 0:19:00.000 --> 0:19:03.680 making grain or whatever the fuck is the suggested thing. 0:19:03.840 --> 0:19:07.639 But I think more realistically, they're probably karate chopping like 0:19:07.800 --> 0:19:11.359 fucking crocodiles and shit out there, just. 0:19:11.920 --> 0:19:15.960 Like man and I would just love for it. Here's 0:19:16.000 --> 0:19:21.000 my only issue with Jay Summons. Yeah logic, because I'm 0:19:21.040 --> 0:19:23.720 with most of it, he makes it sound like the 0:19:23.840 --> 0:19:26.840 Chinese people have been hiding karate from us. 0:19:27.400 --> 0:19:30.399 That is where there's a little bit of a fault 0:19:30.520 --> 0:19:31.640 line in this whole thing. 0:19:32.000 --> 0:19:35.359 Karate is you could go find it, I'd argue at 0:19:35.400 --> 0:19:37.080 your closest tripmon. 0:19:37.359 --> 0:19:39.840 I think it's real hard to not find a karate 0:19:40.000 --> 0:19:41.320 class nowadays. 0:19:41.800 --> 0:19:44.320 Yeah, yeah, yeah, Now whether or not you're too embarrassed 0:19:44.359 --> 0:19:45.680 to sign up for one, yeah. 0:19:46.280 --> 0:19:48.840 And also whether or not it's a legit karate class 0:19:48.920 --> 0:19:50.920 or if it's being taught by like a you know, 0:19:51.280 --> 0:19:55.720 thirty five year old white guy who just is seeking 0:19:55.840 --> 0:19:58.800 employment and figuring out a way to scam people. That's 0:19:58.840 --> 0:19:59.720 a different question. 0:20:00.160 --> 0:20:03.280 Up saying my joke. I literally that's a joke I 0:20:03.359 --> 0:20:06.240 have because it's like and I love that. No, it's okay, 0:20:06.560 --> 0:20:08.520 it's okay. They should still buy tickets to come see 0:20:08.560 --> 0:20:12.840 me the rest of the hours. Dude. I loved the 0:20:12.960 --> 0:20:15.600 idea of a fake you know what this This is 0:20:15.680 --> 0:20:18.600 why I love a fake karate dude because I knew 0:20:18.640 --> 0:20:23.000 this guy when we were like probably like twenty, and 0:20:23.320 --> 0:20:28.600 he his whole persona was we called him Ninja. It 0:20:28.760 --> 0:20:32.800 was his whole persona, hed the dojo, he taught kids. 0:20:33.240 --> 0:20:34.840 He was one of those guys you know where you 0:20:34.880 --> 0:20:37.040 would you know when you know, martial arts guys. And 0:20:37.119 --> 0:20:39.200 he show me some karate and he comes up and 0:20:39.280 --> 0:20:40.560 he's like, if I had a knife, I would just. 0:20:42.119 --> 0:20:44.280 Yeah, yeah, yeah, you know what I mean. 0:20:44.480 --> 0:20:46.280 And then you got to fall out. We were like, no, 0:20:46.480 --> 0:20:49.680 this is crazy, blah blah blah blah blah. And he 0:20:49.800 --> 0:20:52.040 had a good life. He had a good life. He 0:20:52.080 --> 0:20:54.040 had a job, he had a girlfriend, he had a 0:20:54.160 --> 0:20:56.280 good life, and he had a lot of moves that 0:20:56.359 --> 0:20:59.479 could murder you. A lot of dude at their parties 0:20:59.520 --> 0:21:04.879 all drunk. My man, my man gets out of jail, 0:21:05.400 --> 0:21:08.320 right and we're throwing a party for him, and Ninja 0:21:08.440 --> 0:21:13.360 is there and the homies like, I don't believe that ship. Oh, 0:21:13.880 --> 0:21:16.080 and we're like, we're like, no, just. 0:21:17.840 --> 0:21:18.440 Let him live. 0:21:20.320 --> 0:21:25.320 No, we got we got we got to fight. Oh no, 0:21:26.320 --> 0:21:28.639 he throws him through a bookcase. 0:21:29.040 --> 0:21:40.280 Fucks and it ruined his whole life. O. Bro, he 0:21:40.520 --> 0:21:44.880 threw him through a book It was fast, of course 0:21:44.960 --> 0:21:48.720 it was. It was like it was like maybe twenty seconds. 0:21:48.920 --> 0:21:52.200 No, this fight wasn't meant to last long. Bro, He's 0:21:52.280 --> 0:21:54.560 been building it up too far, for too long. He 0:21:54.680 --> 0:21:56.600 made he had a thing in his head and then 0:21:56.680 --> 0:21:59.520 this prison nigga shows up and he just he ate 0:21:59.600 --> 0:21:59.960 him alive. 0:22:00.720 --> 0:22:04.520 Bro through the man through a bookcase. He gets embarrassed 0:22:04.640 --> 0:22:09.680 and goes out to his car, right like, and I 0:22:09.760 --> 0:22:10.960 would be embarrassed as well. 0:22:11.840 --> 0:22:14.040 We didn't go to get something. He just went to 0:22:14.160 --> 0:22:15.080 go get a bro. 0:22:15.400 --> 0:22:17.399 That story gets so much worse. His story gets so 0:22:17.520 --> 0:22:20.240 much worse. He went to his car and then his 0:22:20.440 --> 0:22:24.639 girl was in there also, which is terrible. So his 0:22:24.800 --> 0:22:28.159 girl saw the whole thing happen and she had to 0:22:28.240 --> 0:22:32.600 go out and like console him. He doesn't come back 0:22:32.640 --> 0:22:35.320 to the party. His girl comes back and to get 0:22:35.359 --> 0:22:35.720 his ship. 0:22:36.240 --> 0:22:37.840 We're like, what. 0:22:41.960 --> 0:22:47.520 She's like. She's like, She's like, he just feels as 0:22:47.600 --> 0:22:54.000 if he's lost his honor. And I swear to you, 0:22:54.080 --> 0:22:56.960 I haven't seen dudes since man Bro. I don't even 0:22:57.080 --> 0:23:00.280 like telling the story in public. I have second it 0:23:00.400 --> 0:23:01.440 was so embarrassing. 0:23:01.640 --> 0:23:04.320 You gotta you gotta write that bit that's so funny. 0:23:04.920 --> 0:23:06.560 It's not a bit that's what happened. 0:23:06.760 --> 0:23:10.119 I'm saying it needs to be one. It surely is. 0:23:11.160 --> 0:23:12.560 What a phenomenal story. 0:23:13.000 --> 0:23:16.200 I always after that. I always thought about like. I 0:23:16.280 --> 0:23:18.680