1
00:00:01,360 --> 00:00:04,400
Speaker 1: All right, it's time now forward today's Strawberry Letter and listen.

2
00:00:04,440 --> 00:00:07,840
Speaker 1: If you need advice on relationships, work, sex, parenting, and more,

3
00:00:08,160 --> 00:00:11,280
Speaker 1: please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEFM dot com.

4
00:00:11,440 --> 00:00:14,040
Speaker 1: All you have to do is click submit Strawberry Letter.

5
00:00:14,080 --> 00:00:17,639
Speaker 1: We could be reading your letter live on the air,

6
00:00:17,720 --> 00:00:20,640
Speaker 1: just like we're gonna read this one right here, right now.

7
00:00:21,200 --> 00:00:23,119
Speaker 1: All right, ladies and gentlemen, it is time for the

8
00:00:23,320 --> 00:00:27,120
Speaker 1: Strawberry re Letter. My good friend, Shirley Strawberry. Are we

9
00:00:27,160 --> 00:00:32,479
Speaker 1: really good? Stevens Junior? I were really good? Okay? Subject?

10
00:00:33,360 --> 00:00:36,560
Speaker 1: Thank you. Subject. I'm trying not to run him away.

11
00:00:37,840 --> 00:00:40,880
Speaker 1: Dear Stephen, Shirley, I'm a forty seven year old woman

12
00:00:41,159 --> 00:00:44,280
Speaker 1: and I'm with a man that is out of my league.

13
00:00:44,560 --> 00:00:47,120
Speaker 1: Don't get me wrong. I have a great job and

14
00:00:47,280 --> 00:00:51,599
Speaker 1: I'm educated, but my past is sketchy. He's a surgeon

15
00:00:51,840 --> 00:00:55,480
Speaker 1: and his daughter just finished medical school. He's been divorced

16
00:00:55,520 --> 00:00:58,680
Speaker 1: for six years, and he's ready to settle down with me.

17
00:00:59,400 --> 00:01:03,040
Speaker 1: We met on a site for professional singles and we've

18
00:01:03,040 --> 00:01:06,400
Speaker 1: been dating for almost a year. I've never been married,

19
00:01:06,600 --> 00:01:09,480
Speaker 1: but I worked as an escort and lived with a

20
00:01:09,520 --> 00:01:13,279
Speaker 1: man for fourteen years. Some say he was my pimp,

21
00:01:13,760 --> 00:01:16,120
Speaker 1: but I looked at it as a business that we

22
00:01:16,240 --> 00:01:19,680
Speaker 1: ran together and we made a lot of money. During

23
00:01:19,720 --> 00:01:21,920
Speaker 1: that time. I had a son by one of the

24
00:01:21,959 --> 00:01:25,399
Speaker 1: guys I saw regularly. The guy found out he was

25
00:01:25,480 --> 00:01:29,040
Speaker 1: the father and he filed for custody and one because

26
00:01:29,040 --> 00:01:32,559
Speaker 1: of my lifestyle. I have a good relationship with my son,

27
00:01:32,840 --> 00:01:35,520
Speaker 1: and I paid for his private school tuition up until

28
00:01:35,560 --> 00:01:38,880
Speaker 1: he graduated two years ago. I want to share this

29
00:01:38,959 --> 00:01:41,679
Speaker 1: part of my past with my new boyfriend, but I

30
00:01:41,760 --> 00:01:44,600
Speaker 1: do not want to run him away. I can't get

31
00:01:44,640 --> 00:01:47,400
Speaker 1: that time back that I wasted as an escort, but

32
00:01:47,480 --> 00:01:50,919
Speaker 1: I made sure that I changed my life for the better.

33
00:01:51,960 --> 00:01:54,480
Speaker 1: My new man and I have run into my ex

34
00:01:54,520 --> 00:01:57,320
Speaker 1: pimp or whatever he was, and I told my boyfriend

35
00:01:57,520 --> 00:02:00,800
Speaker 1: that he's an ex boyfriend. In the past, my exp

36
00:02:01,200 --> 00:02:04,960
Speaker 1: purposely destroyed a great relationship I was in simply because

37
00:02:05,000 --> 00:02:08,160
Speaker 1: he was jealous. I can't let my new man find

38
00:02:08,240 --> 00:02:10,880
Speaker 1: out that way. I have not even told him that

39
00:02:10,919 --> 00:02:13,640
Speaker 1: I have a son. What kind of man will be

40
00:02:13,680 --> 00:02:16,680
Speaker 1: okay with this? I feel like the longer I wait,

41
00:02:16,919 --> 00:02:19,920
Speaker 1: the worse it will be. I have been in counseling

42
00:02:20,000 --> 00:02:22,440
Speaker 1: because I don't feel worthy of a good man like this,

43
00:02:22,600 --> 00:02:25,720
Speaker 1: But I know we all have skeletons. Do you think

44
00:02:25,760 --> 00:02:31,000
Speaker 1: he will judge me or dump me? Well, he might

45
00:02:31,080 --> 00:02:35,000
Speaker 1: do both, but that of course depends on how he

46
00:02:35,040 --> 00:02:37,720
Speaker 1: feels about you and the plans he has for you. Guys,

47
00:02:37,760 --> 00:02:41,000
Speaker 1: moving forward, you said he wants to settle down with you,

48
00:02:41,440 --> 00:02:43,680
Speaker 1: but he doesn't have all the facts. He doesn't know

49
00:02:43,720 --> 00:02:46,200
Speaker 1: about your past, and he doesn't know that you have

50
00:02:46,280 --> 00:02:51,160
Speaker 1: a son. Everyone in life, each and every one of us,

51
00:02:51,360 --> 00:02:55,040
Speaker 1: has a past. Yours is different, and yours is way

52
00:02:55,080 --> 00:02:58,080
Speaker 1: more colorful than a lot of people's. Yes, it is,

53
00:02:58,440 --> 00:03:01,800
Speaker 1: But the thing is, you say you are no longer

54
00:03:01,880 --> 00:03:04,280
Speaker 1: that person. That's what I'm going to focus on. You've

55
00:03:04,360 --> 00:03:07,839
Speaker 1: changed for the better, but you can't seem to get

56
00:03:07,880 --> 00:03:10,680
Speaker 1: past your past. So how do you expect others to

57
00:03:10,720 --> 00:03:16,200
Speaker 1: get past your past? You are constantly judging yourself. You're ashamed,

58
00:03:16,320 --> 00:03:18,959
Speaker 1: you haven't forgiven yourself. You're living with all this guilt

59
00:03:19,000 --> 00:03:22,040
Speaker 1: and fear. This has to be eating you up inside.

60
00:03:22,320 --> 00:03:25,520
Speaker 1: But who are you now? Who are you now? That

61
00:03:25,600 --> 00:03:29,600
Speaker 1: should be your focus. You know you do need to

62
00:03:29,600 --> 00:03:31,560
Speaker 1: sit down with this man and tell him you have

63
00:03:31,639 --> 00:03:35,280
Speaker 1: a son who stays with his dad. Not telling him

64
00:03:35,320 --> 00:03:38,640
Speaker 1: that looks very suspicious, like what else is she hiding?

65
00:03:38,720 --> 00:03:41,080
Speaker 1: He's going to be thinking. You do not want him

66
00:03:41,120 --> 00:03:43,640
Speaker 1: to think you're faking. You do not want him to

67
00:03:43,680 --> 00:03:45,800
Speaker 1: think that you're not who he thought you were. I mean,

68
00:03:45,840 --> 00:03:49,200
Speaker 1: you're not, but you know you will have to explain that.

69
00:03:49,480 --> 00:03:51,640
Speaker 1: You don't want him to find out from someone else.

70
00:03:52,000 --> 00:03:55,080
Speaker 1: You will lose his trust that way. You gotta tell

71
00:03:55,160 --> 00:03:57,760
Speaker 1: him you have a son. He will ask you why

72
00:03:57,800 --> 00:04:00,080
Speaker 1: you didn't tell him before. That's going to be a

73
00:04:00,160 --> 00:04:03,440
Speaker 1: flag for him. So I honestly think it's best to

74
00:04:03,480 --> 00:04:07,840
Speaker 1: come clean with your guy now, right now, and tell

75
00:04:07,920 --> 00:04:09,920
Speaker 1: him about your past. You've got to do it. You

76
00:04:09,960 --> 00:04:13,320
Speaker 1: don't have to tell him every little detail. And please

77
00:04:13,360 --> 00:04:16,240
Speaker 1: don't want to mention the word pimp to him. Please

78
00:04:16,279 --> 00:04:19,400
Speaker 1: don't do that. But tell him something you have to

79
00:04:19,680 --> 00:04:22,640
Speaker 1: because at some point you're gonna have to face your past,

80
00:04:22,800 --> 00:04:25,840
Speaker 1: deal with it, let it go. It happened, you cannot

81
00:04:25,920 --> 00:04:29,720
Speaker 1: change it. You're better personnel, You're worthy and valuable. You're

82
00:04:29,720 --> 00:04:33,080
Speaker 1: seeing a therapist. I hope that they're telling you not

83
00:04:33,120 --> 00:04:35,800
Speaker 1: to beat yourself up. You beat yourself up enough about

84
00:04:35,800 --> 00:04:38,240
Speaker 1: your past. It's time to look to the future. If

85
00:04:38,279 --> 00:04:40,480
Speaker 1: your boyfriend really loves you and wants you, he will

86
00:04:40,520 --> 00:04:43,920
Speaker 1: accept you for who you are now. But you also

87
00:04:44,400 --> 00:04:47,400
Speaker 1: you also have to accept who you are and who

88
00:04:47,440 --> 00:04:51,960
Speaker 1: you were, deal with that and move on with your life. Steve,

89
00:04:52,920 --> 00:04:56,960
Speaker 1: I don't know if I can. It wasn't because what

90
00:04:57,080 --> 00:04:58,720
Speaker 1: I'm gonna tell you it's going to be a little

91
00:04:58,720 --> 00:05:03,080
Speaker 1: bit different from what ship we say, and you have

92
00:05:03,120 --> 00:05:05,640
Speaker 1: to wear it out for yourself. All right, let's go.

93
00:05:06,000 --> 00:05:09,159
Speaker 1: I'm trying not to run him away. I'm a forty

94
00:05:09,200 --> 00:05:11,400
Speaker 1: seven year old woman. I'm with the man that's out

95
00:05:11,440 --> 00:05:14,000
Speaker 1: of my league. Don't get me wrong. I have a

96
00:05:14,040 --> 00:05:16,840
Speaker 1: great job and I'm educated, but my past is sketching.

97
00:05:17,960 --> 00:05:22,400
Speaker 1: Whenever you start a letter like this, we have a problem.

98
00:05:22,440 --> 00:05:24,679
Speaker 1: How are you dating a manness out of your league

99
00:05:25,640 --> 00:05:33,040
Speaker 1: when clearly men have one objective to marry up. We

100
00:05:33,040 --> 00:05:38,240
Speaker 1: will get the best chick that we could get, the

101
00:05:38,279 --> 00:05:42,840
Speaker 1: one that makes us look and feel the best. So

102
00:05:42,960 --> 00:05:45,640
Speaker 1: stop thinking you're out of his league, because you're not.

103
00:05:47,640 --> 00:05:50,560
Speaker 1: Now because I know the whole letter I was going

104
00:05:50,640 --> 00:05:55,719
Speaker 1: to tell you. You say, I'm educated, but my past

105
00:05:55,800 --> 00:05:57,920
Speaker 1: is sketchling. I know a lot of people, some sketchy

106
00:05:57,960 --> 00:06:03,600
Speaker 1: pass I can't tell you for mine. He's a surgeon

107
00:06:03,600 --> 00:06:06,159
Speaker 1: and his daughter just finished medical school. He's been divorced

108
00:06:06,200 --> 00:06:08,480
Speaker 1: for six years, and he's ready to settle down with me.

109
00:06:08,839 --> 00:06:10,680
Speaker 1: We went on the site for We met on the

110
00:06:10,680 --> 00:06:14,960
Speaker 1: site for professional singles. We've been dating for almost a

111
00:06:15,040 --> 00:06:20,040
Speaker 1: year now. I've never been married, but I worked as

112
00:06:20,040 --> 00:06:22,559
Speaker 1: an escort and live with the man for fourteen years.

113
00:06:22,560 --> 00:06:28,560
Speaker 1: Some say he was my pimp right here, Hold on, Steve, Yeah,

114
00:06:28,680 --> 00:06:32,600
Speaker 1: we got to kill all this right here. It's going

115
00:06:32,760 --> 00:06:38,200
Speaker 1: down here with these two escort pimp down here, friendin't on,

116
00:06:38,320 --> 00:06:40,520
Speaker 1: find anybody got a pass? Shoot what we're going to do?

117
00:06:41,400 --> 00:06:44,919
Speaker 1: All right, Hang on, Steve. Part two of your responses

118
00:06:44,920 --> 00:06:47,920
Speaker 1: coming up at twenty three minutes after the hour. Today's

119
00:06:47,920 --> 00:06:50,599
Speaker 1: Strawberry Letters subject I'm not trying to run him away.

120
00:06:50,760 --> 00:06:54,040
Speaker 1: We'll get back into it right after this. You're listening

121
00:06:54,240 --> 00:06:57,479
Speaker 1: to Steve Harvey Morning Show. All right, come on, Steve,

122
00:06:57,520 --> 00:07:01,960
Speaker 1: let's recap today's Strawberry letter subject I'm trying not to

123
00:07:02,040 --> 00:07:04,880
Speaker 1: run him away. Well, it's forty seven year old lady

124
00:07:04,880 --> 00:07:07,040
Speaker 1: that's dating a man. She claims he's out of league,

125
00:07:07,080 --> 00:07:09,520
Speaker 1: and she just says, don't get me wrong, I got

126
00:07:09,520 --> 00:07:13,160
Speaker 1: a great job and educated. But my passes sketching, well,

127
00:07:13,240 --> 00:07:18,840
Speaker 1: her passes sketching. But you shouldn't be You shouldn't allow

128
00:07:19,000 --> 00:07:22,560
Speaker 1: yourself to be married to your past. It's the future

129
00:07:22,600 --> 00:07:25,800
Speaker 1: and who you are now that's the key to this

130
00:07:25,840 --> 00:07:29,240
Speaker 1: whole thing, right. But now we have problems because we're

131
00:07:29,240 --> 00:07:32,280
Speaker 1: gonna get some informa. He's been divorced for six years,

132
00:07:32,400 --> 00:07:33,960
Speaker 1: rady to settle down with me. We met on the

133
00:07:34,000 --> 00:07:37,600
Speaker 1: site for professional singles. We've been dating for almost a year.

134
00:07:38,560 --> 00:07:41,120
Speaker 1: I've never been married, but I worked as an escort

135
00:07:41,160 --> 00:07:43,200
Speaker 1: and I lived with a man for fourteen years, and

136
00:07:43,360 --> 00:07:46,240
Speaker 1: something say he was my pimp. Some say he was

137
00:07:46,280 --> 00:07:48,440
Speaker 1: my pimp, but I looked at it as a business

138
00:07:49,040 --> 00:07:52,160
Speaker 1: and that we ran together and we made a lot

139
00:07:52,160 --> 00:07:59,040
Speaker 1: of money. Don't repeat that ignorant ass nine to nobody else. Now,

140
00:07:59,080 --> 00:08:02,920
Speaker 1: we can't help if you're gonna keep saying dumb sugar honey,

141
00:08:03,200 --> 00:08:10,520
Speaker 1: iced tea and that's all this is. Damn it. Write

142
00:08:10,600 --> 00:08:13,360
Speaker 1: us with this information and then want some damn health

143
00:08:14,520 --> 00:08:16,960
Speaker 1: talking about I've been mad. I worked as an escort

144
00:08:17,000 --> 00:08:18,960
Speaker 1: and I live with a man fourteen years. Something say

145
00:08:19,000 --> 00:08:21,160
Speaker 1: he was my pimp, but I looked at it as

146
00:08:21,160 --> 00:08:23,360
Speaker 1: a business that we ran together. We made a lot

147
00:08:23,360 --> 00:08:27,160
Speaker 1: of money. But during that time I had a son

148
00:08:27,240 --> 00:08:30,640
Speaker 1: by one of the guys. I saw regularly what the

149
00:08:30,800 --> 00:08:32,800
Speaker 1: guy found out he was a father and file for

150
00:08:32,880 --> 00:08:39,200
Speaker 1: custody in one because of my lifestyle, what lady, you

151
00:08:39,360 --> 00:08:42,720
Speaker 1: can't tell listen to no damn body, it ain't going

152
00:08:42,800 --> 00:08:46,760
Speaker 1: over good with me. I don't even want you, and

153
00:08:46,880 --> 00:08:52,680
Speaker 1: you don't judge like that. I don't. But you give

154
00:08:52,760 --> 00:08:55,600
Speaker 1: me this information and the next word out of my

155
00:08:55,640 --> 00:09:00,120
Speaker 1: mouth is I want to marry you. Some wrong with

156
00:09:00,240 --> 00:09:02,240
Speaker 1: me at this point, I'm just gonna be honest with

157
00:09:02,320 --> 00:09:05,400
Speaker 1: all y'all listening. Steve, give a hope and all like that.

158
00:09:05,960 --> 00:09:10,640
Speaker 1: You messed up though, because you started the relationship wrong.

159
00:09:11,240 --> 00:09:15,160
Speaker 1: You didn't divulge this information, and you can't pop this

160
00:09:15,320 --> 00:09:18,560
Speaker 1: on this man. Now. I have a good relationship with

161
00:09:18,600 --> 00:09:21,000
Speaker 1: my son and I paid for his private school tuition

162
00:09:21,120 --> 00:09:24,840
Speaker 1: until he graduated two years ago. I want to share

163
00:09:24,920 --> 00:09:28,280
Speaker 1: this part of my past with my new boyfriend, but

164
00:09:28,559 --> 00:09:31,080
Speaker 1: I don't want to run him away later. He gone.

165
00:09:33,120 --> 00:09:36,960
Speaker 1: As soon as you say this, he gone, And I

166
00:09:37,040 --> 00:09:43,360
Speaker 1: can't thinking no man that would state unless his other

167
00:09:43,520 --> 00:09:48,199
Speaker 1: hustle when he ain't being a surgeon. Is is he him? What?

168
00:09:56,000 --> 00:09:58,440
Speaker 1: I don't know of a guy that can sign up

169
00:09:58,480 --> 00:10:03,480
Speaker 1: for this. I can't get that time back that I

170
00:10:03,559 --> 00:10:05,880
Speaker 1: wasted as an escort, but I made sure that I

171
00:10:06,040 --> 00:10:08,240
Speaker 1: changed my life for the better. Okay, now we're working

172
00:10:08,280 --> 00:10:12,040
Speaker 1: with the positive. You've changed your life, you're moving forward.

173
00:10:12,160 --> 00:10:16,680
Speaker 1: That's good. Congratulations. But the thing about seeing is that

174
00:10:16,800 --> 00:10:19,880
Speaker 1: I learned it cost you more than you want to pay,

175
00:10:20,760 --> 00:10:23,319
Speaker 1: and it makes you stay longer than you want to stay.

176
00:10:23,880 --> 00:10:26,920
Speaker 1: And everybody gotta seeing that they got to deal with.

177
00:10:27,400 --> 00:10:30,880
Speaker 1: Congratulations on pulling yourself together and climbing up and changing

178
00:10:30,920 --> 00:10:33,600
Speaker 1: your life. And I commend you with that system. My

179
00:10:33,679 --> 00:10:36,280
Speaker 1: new man and I have run into my ex pimp

180
00:10:36,800 --> 00:10:40,000
Speaker 1: or what I've just told you to say. Stop saying

181
00:10:40,080 --> 00:10:43,800
Speaker 1: that I just told your ass full lines back, Stop

182
00:10:43,840 --> 00:10:46,800
Speaker 1: saying escort and pimp. Now you're talking about you ran

183
00:10:46,920 --> 00:10:49,520
Speaker 1: up into your ex pimp or whatever he was. You

184
00:10:49,600 --> 00:10:53,640
Speaker 1: know what he was. He was the pimp. Y'all run

185
00:10:53,640 --> 00:10:55,960
Speaker 1: a business together and you're the only one with the product,

186
00:10:56,400 --> 00:10:59,240
Speaker 1: and he's staying at the house collecting money. That's a pimp.

187
00:11:00,480 --> 00:11:03,800
Speaker 1: And I told my boyfriend that he's an ex boyfriend

188
00:11:03,840 --> 00:11:07,280
Speaker 1: in the past, my ex pimpton. Damn it, I just

189
00:11:07,559 --> 00:11:13,520
Speaker 1: told you to quit saying pimp. My ex pimp purposely

190
00:11:13,600 --> 00:11:16,560
Speaker 1: destroyed a great relationship I was in simply because he

191
00:11:16,640 --> 00:11:19,760
Speaker 1: was jealous. I can't let my new man find out

192
00:11:19,800 --> 00:11:23,880
Speaker 1: that way. Well, how gonna find out? I have not

193
00:11:24,040 --> 00:11:28,480
Speaker 1: even told him that I have a son. Later. What

194
00:11:28,640 --> 00:11:30,680
Speaker 1: kind of man will be okay with this? I don't

195
00:11:30,679 --> 00:11:37,400
Speaker 1: know unless he pimp'd a pimpt flash surgeon told. Unless

196
00:11:37,440 --> 00:11:39,480
Speaker 1: he is a surgeon and he's pimping on the side,

197
00:11:41,120 --> 00:11:43,520
Speaker 1: I feel the longest I wait, the worst thing will

198
00:11:43,559 --> 00:11:47,880
Speaker 1: be you already been a year. I will be in.

199
00:11:48,040 --> 00:11:50,640
Speaker 1: I've been in counseling because I don't feel worthy of

200
00:11:50,679 --> 00:11:52,840
Speaker 1: a good man like this. You can get out of counseling.

201
00:11:52,920 --> 00:11:55,920
Speaker 1: You need prayer. But I do know we have all

202
00:11:55,960 --> 00:11:58,520
Speaker 1: halves keleton. Do you think he would judge me and

203
00:11:58,600 --> 00:12:06,640
Speaker 1: dump me? He gonna go right this one off? Start over, douces.

204
00:12:07,480 --> 00:12:11,079
Speaker 1: The next man you meet, tell him that you have

205
00:12:11,120 --> 00:12:14,680
Speaker 1: a son. You can leave your path out of this.

206
00:12:15,559 --> 00:12:19,440
Speaker 1: What have you been doing? I've been working various jobs.

207
00:12:20,280 --> 00:12:23,480
Speaker 1: Stop saying that escort. Stop saying you had a pimp.

208
00:12:23,760 --> 00:12:26,240
Speaker 1: You don't have to report that news to nobody. It

209
00:12:26,280 --> 00:12:29,920
Speaker 1: ain't nobody's damn business. Everybody deserves to recover and get

210
00:12:29,960 --> 00:12:33,600
Speaker 1: it right right now. You now, I think you should

211
00:12:33,600 --> 00:12:37,000
Speaker 1: go ahead and tell this guy and see what he do.

212
00:12:39,520 --> 00:12:43,320
Speaker 1: All right, Steve, Please leave your kind of letter on

213
00:12:43,480 --> 00:12:47,280
Speaker 1: Instagram at Steve Harvey FM and check out trying not

214
00:12:47,400 --> 00:12:54,480
Speaker 1: to running when you tell him this. Up next, it

215
00:12:54,640 --> 00:12:58,719
Speaker 1: is Sports Talk with a newly married junior. Right after this,

216
00:12:59,800 --> 00:13:02,559
Speaker 1: you are listening to the Day Harvey Morning Show