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Speaker 1: Wind down with Jana Kramer and I'm Heeartradio podcast.

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Speaker 2: All right, tell us the big reveal Christmas present at

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Speaker 2: the Breastthouse.

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Speaker 3: It was the best Christmas of all time. Preston calls

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Speaker 3: it no more lonely Christmases. We got a puppy, Yeah no.

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Speaker 3: And I was really reluctant. You know, Tyke was eighteen

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Speaker 3: and a half. George lived to be twelve. But letting

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Speaker 3: go Tyke still makes me emotional to even talk about.

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Speaker 3: And so I was afraid I could never love another man.

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Speaker 3: You can, and I do. And he's really sweet and

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Speaker 3: he's fluffy and it's great. And we got him a

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Speaker 3: couple of weeks ago, and it was really tricky because

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Speaker 3: we picked him up and then we took him straight

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Speaker 3: to school. So he went to Jana's dog trainer. Because

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Speaker 3: one thing I know is that I am a little

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Speaker 3: bit at capacity, and so part of my hesitation was

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Speaker 3: just like adding another heartbeat into the mix and another responsibility.

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Speaker 3: And I know Love is terrified of dogs, as you

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Speaker 3: both know, and so like she had opened up her

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Speaker 3: heart to a certain kind of dog. She was like,

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Speaker 3: I can do this kind of dog or that kind

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Speaker 3: of dog. I think because her experiences have been good

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Speaker 3: with those kinds of dogs, and so we're just building trust,

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Speaker 3: one tiny little popprint at a time in our house.

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Speaker 3: And it's sweet. And of course Lyon has no healthy

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Speaker 3: fear of dogs. So we're at a dog park and she,

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Speaker 3: you know, goes up to like a foaming at the

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Speaker 3: mouth German shepherd and she's like, ah, dogdy, you know,

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Speaker 3: and I'm like, okay, okay. So we're just trying to

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Speaker 3: find a sweet little balance. And it's a boy, which

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Speaker 3: is great, so that legend can had a baby.

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Speaker 1: It's a boy and a baby.

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Speaker 3: It's a boy, Legend gets another dude in the house.

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Speaker 3: We're just trying to balance. They been asking, they had

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Speaker 3: been a little bit, but I really just firmly said,

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Speaker 3: it just can't happen right now. I said maybe in

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Speaker 3: the spring. It's too cool to potty train. I can't

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Speaker 3: deal with a puppy. I'm just very much we've been

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Speaker 3: putting them off so and I was a little nervous

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Speaker 3: would they be sad if they didn't get to go

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Speaker 3: pick it out and all the things. But ultimately Preston

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Speaker 3: was like, we have to do some due diligence here.

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Speaker 3: This This is a really it's my first dog with

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Speaker 3: Preston too, so that's kind of cool, like it was

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Speaker 3: our first puppy experience as a couple.

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Speaker 4: Surprising is so fun. We did that with our old

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Speaker 4: dog who since passed, and we surprised them and they

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Speaker 4: just ough.

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Speaker 1: It's so fun to do that.

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Speaker 3: Way to share the video with you, guys, it's really special.

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Speaker 3: I love that.

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Speaker 2: Do we have any New Year's resolutions? And what are

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Speaker 2: we doing for New Year's guys?

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Speaker 3: Oh? Friends, I don't like goals.

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Speaker 1: I don't really have resolutions either.

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Speaker 3: I don't I haven't had a minute to sit with

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Speaker 3: myself to know what the resolution is on. Two little

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Speaker 3: words keep popping in my brain often, and that is

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Speaker 3: more time, and so I'm just prayerful over what that

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Speaker 3: means and if that just I think I have ideas

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Speaker 3: of just like maybe more time for myself, maybe more

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Speaker 3: time with my family, because Preston's been like really gone

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Speaker 3: a lot, and when he's home, he's still gone. So yeah,

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Speaker 3: more time is something I'm marinating on and being prayerful about,

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Speaker 3: but I don't know what it is yet.

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Speaker 4: Mine last year was joy, which I still kind of

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Speaker 4: want to take that in again to this year. But

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Speaker 4: I think it's going to be positivity.

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Speaker 3: Oh good.

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Speaker 4: Not that I'm a super negative person necessarily, and explained,

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Speaker 4: I just really want to try and stay in the

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Speaker 4: positive at all times, because I can be super positive,

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Speaker 4: but then when I get negative, I feel like I

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Speaker 4: go to negative.

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Speaker 2: Or do I think that you're more negative?

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Speaker 1: It just depends.

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Speaker 4: Like if I'm mad at Nick or if I'm frustrated

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Speaker 4: with anything, sometimes I can just like dwell on it

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Speaker 4: for a minute and just be negative. I just don't

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Speaker 4: like and I don't like that when other people are negative,

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Speaker 4: you know what I mean, Like if Nick's being negative

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Speaker 4: about something, I'm why are you meaning so negative? And

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Speaker 4: then I'll catch myself to doing it too. So I

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Speaker 4: just want to stay in the positive because you can

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Speaker 4: find positives in all situations. It's just hard to do

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Speaker 4: at times, and I would like to stay in the positive.

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Speaker 4: I did find a lot more joy this year, I

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Speaker 4: feel like and seeing the joy in those situations, but

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Speaker 4: just stay in the positive.

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Speaker 3: My question is did you grow up with that modeled

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Speaker 3: for you positive the negatiative?

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Speaker 1: Yeah?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I did too, and I think that's why it's

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Speaker 3: a hard rewire for it. It is like they're always

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Speaker 3: finding the one thing.

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Speaker 4: Yeah. Yeah, And I mean I see this in random people.

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Speaker 1: I know.

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Speaker 4: I'm just kind of like when you see it on

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Speaker 4: the outside, I'm like, why are we being so negative?

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Speaker 4: Like right, move on, you know, right? And so I'm like, oh,

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Speaker 4: that's what it looks like to other people when you're

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Speaker 4: like dwelling and being kindive, you know. So I'm just

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Speaker 4: positive is my word for the new year? Yeah, how

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Speaker 4: about you?

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Speaker 3: I like that.

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Speaker 2: Well, I did this thing, and I'm really proud of

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Speaker 2: myself that I actually have done it throughout the whole

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Speaker 2: entire year. So I started, I'll say, so it's it's

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Speaker 2: the year, right, and January. Every single month I did

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Speaker 2: like a diary of my year, like the highest close

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Speaker 2: of it. So January, February, March, abley, June, July.

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Speaker 3: So I'm so good at that.

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Speaker 2: So November or whatever and now December and so but

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Speaker 2: I I really it was one of those things where

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Speaker 2: it's been such a good reflective moment to kind of

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Speaker 2: look back and see, Okay, what where maybe relationally I

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Speaker 2: need some we might need some help, or where you know,

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Speaker 2: where this area might be lacking or what's really great

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Speaker 2: and like, hey, what really worked for us? So like

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Speaker 2: I look back in like February, it's like February was

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Speaker 2: a stressful month, wanting a break and feeling like I

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Speaker 2: was doing this alone where it was sick with COVID

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Speaker 2: group strap and and so I am saying, like highlights

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Speaker 2: was the amazing Valentine's there that Alan made for me,

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Speaker 2: incorporate the kids. I really needed a break of a

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Speaker 2: get getaway, like kind of knowing where I'm at. So

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Speaker 2: like for next February, I'm like, I know now that

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Speaker 2: I need something. I need a trip during that month

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Speaker 2: or something that brings me a little bit alike, because

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Speaker 2: it's very gloomy and dark and you know here in Nashville.

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Speaker 2: So and then just kind of looking back and looking

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Speaker 2: back at you know how March was. You know, we

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Speaker 2: went to the Bahamas, but then the next day I'm

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Speaker 2: flying to film movie and like the how things can

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Speaker 2: so quickly turn to from you know, from a minute,

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Speaker 2: And so I think it's it's been really nice to

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Speaker 2: Now I'll look back and go through it and go, Okay,

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Speaker 2: these were some really high high is these where some

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Speaker 2: this was a low and this is what I can

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Speaker 2: take in to do better next year, or to also

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Speaker 2: go okay in the moments where I feel like I'm

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Speaker 2: never going to work again or this is not happening,

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Speaker 2: It's like, no, can't you see back in March when

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Speaker 2: this happened very last minute that it's you're okay. And

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Speaker 2: so to take a pause and to take a breath

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Speaker 2: and to not get to and I think that's my

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Speaker 2: thing is to yeah, to look back and go enjoy

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Speaker 2: today because tomorrow is going to probably change drastically.

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Speaker 4: I think it's also really like you said, like with

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Speaker 4: the February thing, like recognizing like, okay, come February, I'm

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Speaker 4: usually pretty antsy and excloom me and I need to

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Speaker 4: get out and like planning ahead for that. So it's

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Speaker 4: not like we're not letting ourselves get to that point, yes,

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Speaker 4: because then we have something to look forward to, you know.

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Speaker 4: I mean, I think that's really important. That's smart to do.

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Speaker 2: I'ry no, you should try it. So, yeah, it's like

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Speaker 2: the year, so what you do it. So what I

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Speaker 2: do is every once it becomes a new month, so

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Speaker 2: it'll be you know, at the end of January, I'll

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Speaker 2: say the highs and lows of the month, and then

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Speaker 2: if you want to put a goal or if you

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Speaker 2: want to put you know what you want to work

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Speaker 2: on or yeah, it just kind of holds each month

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Speaker 2: accountable as opposed to being like joy for the year,

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Speaker 2: which is great, you know what I mean, Like it's

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Speaker 2: so good, but it's such a hard thing to do

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Speaker 2: when we're not looking at it at least by month.

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Speaker 4: Absolutely, it would be so much easier because I'm listening

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Speaker 4: to what you're saying and I'm like, okay. For me,

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Speaker 4: I'm like, okay, So instead of getting negative about what's

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Speaker 4: going on here, how do I see the positive in that?

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Speaker 4: You know, and getting more specific and really digging in.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I like that. And it's almost like too for you.

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Speaker 2: It could be instead of maybe writing the highs and lows,

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Speaker 2: it could just be like, what were you really grateful

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Speaker 2: for that month? Right? So then it's really stamping on

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Speaker 2: highlighting joy.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: And me and Alan we've been doing this thing where

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Speaker 2: we've got every week we have this journal where because

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Speaker 2: again I think in marriage, it's so easy to just

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Speaker 2: be like you're not doing this dah, or just like tensions,

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Speaker 2: especially around holiday seasons and travel and a lot of that,

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Speaker 2: so what we've been doing is and sometimes we don't

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Speaker 2: know what the other person is thinking, so and it's

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Speaker 2: been really really good for us. So we both have

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Speaker 2: a journal and once a week we'll go I'll grab

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Speaker 2: his and he'll grab mine whenever. I don't know when

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Speaker 2: he does it, but we just like he's been mostly

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Speaker 2: doing on Mondays and I'll write in his like just

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Speaker 2: be like, hey, thank you and just like just a

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Speaker 2: grateful list of like the things that I'm really grateful

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Speaker 2: for with him, or just writing him a little note,

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Speaker 2: and it's just really nice to go, oh, Okay, I

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Speaker 2: didn't It's just sweet to remember that he was so

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Speaker 2: appreciative of everything that I did and that felt really nice.

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Speaker 2: And and then I can sit down too, and instead

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Speaker 2: of maybe calling out the negative stuff, I can be like, hey,

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Speaker 2: like you rocked it with this, and I really appreciate

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Speaker 2: you being like so patient and mind and yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 2: it's easy to really nice.

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Speaker 1: I know.

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Speaker 2: So that's something that we also, like, I've been able

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Speaker 2: to look back on and it's been nice, and it

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Speaker 2: also centers me to a place of gratitude for him. Yes,

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Speaker 2: And I think sometimes as women we can not go

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Speaker 2: to gratitude first, and we might be more go to

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Speaker 2: like frustration and so.

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Speaker 4: We're focusing on the things they're not doing versus the

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Speaker 4: things they are doing.

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Speaker 1: How lot of the time and helpful starting with that positivity, guys.

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Speaker 3: So for what it's worth, I always take all of

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Speaker 3: January to collect my resolution. So if you are like

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Speaker 3: me and haven't resoluted, that's totally fine. I give myself

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Speaker 3: the month of January to put Christmas dicreations away, take

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Speaker 3: a deep breath, let the winter silence telp me determine

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Speaker 3: where we're headed.

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Speaker 2: But I will just say though, if you guys did

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Speaker 2: write something like I bet you the men will show

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Speaker 2: up Like men show up more when they're rewarded by

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Speaker 2: behind this and when they feel like we I ap

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Speaker 2: appreciate that because most men want that, like you were

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Speaker 2: great and you're amazing and you're doing awesome and you're

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Speaker 2: being so handsome and they need that, like but they

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Speaker 2: really do because they want to like make us proud. Yes,

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Speaker 2: for sure, you know, so the Burton Ernie story. Maybe

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Speaker 2: back when you don't have to get a book, but

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Speaker 2: put a little sticky note on the side and just

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Speaker 2: be like, I'm really grateful for you and list a

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Speaker 2: few things. Yeah, and then they might be like, they'll

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Speaker 2: show up even more for you.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely try it. You're not going to I would, Yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I would.

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Speaker 3: Preston won't do that. But we have our own little

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Speaker 3: system and I think it's but you do it to Preston. No,

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Speaker 3: Like I have a little system with him that is

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Speaker 3: sweet and it works for him, but he's not you guys.

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Speaker 3: Anything that smells like homework or a journal or a paper.

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Speaker 1: He's no, you do it for him.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, but I like it's weird, like right different, Yeah yeah,

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Speaker 3: well that's fair, not written like yeah yeah, yeahyeah, yeah yeah.

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Speaker 3: We're working on and I've been apologizing more. I said

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Speaker 3: I'm sorry three times last week.

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Speaker 1: Are you proud of me?

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Speaker 3: I am? And now heartfelt I'm sorry. That's great, not

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Speaker 3: like I'm sorry, I'm sorry like a sorry, Yeah, I'm sorry,

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Speaker 3: you suck. No, I really was, like I love you

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Speaker 3: and I'm really sorry.

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Speaker 1: Period.

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Speaker 3: That was it. It's like ripping off a band aid.

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Speaker 3: Why don't you do it? Kind of feels good? You know.

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Speaker 3: Those little resolutions are sneaky, but we're trying. Time. Is

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Speaker 3: anyone doing a physical New Year's resolution? This year.

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Speaker 4: I mean I always could work out more for sure,

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Speaker 4: But is that what you mean, like.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, walks with me?

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Speaker 4: I will, Okay, yeah, I'll start walking for sure.

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Speaker 1: I need to.

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Speaker 4: I'm not as like lethargic on the medicine anymore.

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Speaker 1: We should do which.

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Speaker 3: Is not an excuse, but maybe we tack on a

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Speaker 3: little something to the wind down days. So yeah, but

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Speaker 3: I really enjoy I want to do like a once

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Speaker 3: a month walk out Percy or Radner.

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Speaker 1: Oh, I love that.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, right absolutely, And that doesn't see your idea because

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Speaker 4: he used it.

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Speaker 1: I kind of figured that's what his idea want. I

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Speaker 1: knew it too. We got to go back to this lot. Okay, wow,

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Speaker 1: that was the part two. We're going to go pin this.

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Speaker 4: We're going to come back to this, or or at

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Speaker 4: least we are so for me, that doesn't I don't

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Speaker 4: even know, and we don't.

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Speaker 3: Have to know.

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Speaker 1: We have to. Well, I'm going to keep us going back.

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Speaker 4: That seems less like like once a month plan whatever

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Speaker 4: on the calendar feels better than just like come walk

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Speaker 4: with me every day, you know what I mean?

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Speaker 1: Not better, it's easier.

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Speaker 4: For some reason in my mind, it's like planned, and

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Speaker 4: it's scheduled and it's whatever and let's go, and it's

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Speaker 4: like I love it.

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Speaker 3: Well.

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Speaker 2: So it's so hard because so one of my neighbor's

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Speaker 2: Joy that I walk with and Joy, yeah, love love

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Speaker 2: to actually want to have her on because she's a

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Speaker 2: resentment coach hotly.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, she listens to us like, man, you'll need some coaching.

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Speaker 2: No, she's she's a life coach, but she she deals

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Speaker 2: around like resentment. She's lot forses and stuff. She's great,

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Speaker 2: I really have just like I just think she's great.

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Speaker 2: And so so we've been walking a bunch and she's

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Speaker 2: kind of like she works from home, so I'm able

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Speaker 2: to be like, hey, I'm going for a walk in

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Speaker 2: twenty one to go, you know what I mean. So

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Speaker 2: she's but then one of the other neighbors saw us

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Speaker 2: walking and was like, hey, let us let me know

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Speaker 2: next time you're walking. And it's like, right, we're not

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Speaker 2: like every nine like, I can't schedule mostly a walk

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Speaker 2: right because it's just like and it just changes.

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Speaker 4: And that's what makes it hard because everyone just like

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Speaker 4: I'm like, can you come in town. I'm like, yeah, no,

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Speaker 4: I can't be there in ten minutes. Yeah, I mean

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Speaker 4: it's gonna take me twelve to get there, and yeah,

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Speaker 4: that's what makes it. But if we did like a

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Speaker 4: but I'm saying if we have once a month or

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Speaker 4: where we could plan a time and we had a like.

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Speaker 2: That is more sustainable. I can't be like Tuesdays. What

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Speaker 2: about like that's I would cancel every single one, right.

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Speaker 4: And that's where it gets hard. So we all understand.

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Speaker 4: That's why it's easier when you have your people in

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Speaker 4: your neighborhood. Yeah, for sure, but I love the idea.

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Speaker 4: Let's do the once a month at Bradner.

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Speaker 1: Which Happy New Year.

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Speaker 3: I'm really glad someone's okay.

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Speaker 2: All right, Well on that note, happy to year, guys.

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Speaker 2: It's going to be the best your yet. Let's shed

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Speaker 2: the snake.

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Speaker 1: And grab onto that horse bite bite