1
00:00:00,400 --> 00:00:04,440
Speaker 1: Big Bank DJ screens and Baby J with the number

2
00:00:04,480 --> 00:00:06,880
Speaker 1: one podcast industry, Big Big.

3
00:00:06,960 --> 00:00:10,320
Speaker 2: Facts, a lot from Revolt Studios and the atl's time

4
00:00:10,400 --> 00:00:14,080
Speaker 2: for Big Facts, Big Bank, Baby J DJ scream here

5
00:00:14,120 --> 00:00:16,599
Speaker 2: today with the father of the legends of the late

6
00:00:16,640 --> 00:00:18,400
Speaker 2: Great rich On Me Kawan, Corey Lamar.

7
00:00:18,480 --> 00:00:22,680
Speaker 1: Welcome to What's What's What's up? My brother?

8
00:00:22,720 --> 00:00:23,400
Speaker 3: How you feeling man?

9
00:00:23,400 --> 00:00:25,120
Speaker 1: How you feeling all right?

10
00:00:25,160 --> 00:00:28,840
Speaker 4: Man? Still processing? You know, trying to process, man.

11
00:00:28,760 --> 00:00:33,000
Speaker 5: Yeah, trying to keep one feet in front of another

12
00:00:33,040 --> 00:00:35,360
Speaker 5: one man, still surreal to me, you know what I mean.

13
00:00:36,440 --> 00:00:38,479
Speaker 4: But my faith, man, my faith in.

14
00:00:38,520 --> 00:00:41,880
Speaker 5: God and you know, support man, keep me going.

15
00:00:42,280 --> 00:00:43,800
Speaker 4: But you know, just trying to.

16
00:00:44,479 --> 00:00:47,760
Speaker 3: Ask you that too, what with such a tragedy, like

17
00:00:48,000 --> 00:00:50,360
Speaker 3: who outside of your faith in God?

18
00:00:50,400 --> 00:00:50,800
Speaker 4: Of course?

19
00:00:50,880 --> 00:00:53,880
Speaker 3: Like who or what is your support system to help

20
00:00:53,880 --> 00:00:56,160
Speaker 3: you get by on the day to day man?

21
00:00:56,200 --> 00:00:57,440
Speaker 4: You know who instrumental?

22
00:00:57,520 --> 00:00:57,720
Speaker 3: Man?

23
00:00:57,840 --> 00:01:02,080
Speaker 5: And who had been on me about seeing a therapist

24
00:01:02,120 --> 00:01:10,240
Speaker 5: before corn transition, that boy, take like one take was

25
00:01:10,360 --> 00:01:12,959
Speaker 5: on me on me heaven man, because like I share

26
00:01:12,959 --> 00:01:14,559
Speaker 5: a lot of stuff with him, you know what I'm saying,

27
00:01:14,600 --> 00:01:18,479
Speaker 5: Like that's like my little brother or whatever and him man,

28
00:01:18,600 --> 00:01:20,720
Speaker 5: and like family. You know what I'm saying I'm proud,

29
00:01:20,760 --> 00:01:22,200
Speaker 5: but I'm a loner. You know what I'm saying, Like,

30
00:01:22,240 --> 00:01:24,400
Speaker 5: I don't I don't kick it with a lot of people, man,

31
00:01:24,520 --> 00:01:27,080
Speaker 5: So if I had to just say, like one person

32
00:01:27,120 --> 00:01:29,840
Speaker 5: in direct will be mon Ta Man. You know I

33
00:01:30,560 --> 00:01:34,240
Speaker 5: talked to him about a lot of stuff and no

34
00:01:34,480 --> 00:01:39,600
Speaker 5: ship from the day corn transition that I called him.

35
00:01:39,640 --> 00:01:42,440
Speaker 5: You know, dude, was there, been there even before you

36
00:01:42,520 --> 00:01:45,360
Speaker 5: know what I'm saying, like instrumental in helping me man

37
00:01:45,480 --> 00:01:47,840
Speaker 5: deal with corn and summer corn darkest moments. You know

38
00:01:47,880 --> 00:01:50,760
Speaker 5: what I'm saying, He was there, man, So definitely might

39
00:01:50,880 --> 00:01:51,960
Speaker 5: take shout out man Tayle.

40
00:01:52,520 --> 00:01:55,320
Speaker 6: And that's like, that's one thing that I wanted to

41
00:01:55,320 --> 00:01:58,480
Speaker 6: to ask you, not trying to get too deep into it,

42
00:01:58,520 --> 00:02:02,400
Speaker 6: but being the that you and Kwan were so close

43
00:02:02,560 --> 00:02:05,880
Speaker 6: and you were so hands on and every aspect of

44
00:02:05,920 --> 00:02:11,040
Speaker 6: his life from the music, to your grandkids, to the

45
00:02:11,040 --> 00:02:15,639
Speaker 6: family to like all of that kind of stuff, how

46
00:02:15,680 --> 00:02:19,799
Speaker 6: did you kind of, like scream said, navigate through that

47
00:02:20,320 --> 00:02:23,000
Speaker 6: or through the feeling of knowing that you weren't able

48
00:02:23,040 --> 00:02:26,080
Speaker 6: to be there for him at that time that was

49
00:02:26,120 --> 00:02:27,519
Speaker 6: so important.

50
00:02:28,560 --> 00:02:30,040
Speaker 4: I wouldn't say I wasn't there.

51
00:02:30,639 --> 00:02:33,560
Speaker 6: I mean like physically, like you physically weren't there, because

52
00:02:33,600 --> 00:02:36,040
Speaker 6: you know, when that happens to people sometimes because it's

53
00:02:36,040 --> 00:02:39,200
Speaker 6: happened to me before, you have what they call survivor's remorse.

54
00:02:39,680 --> 00:02:41,520
Speaker 4: Because I don't have that. I don't have that.

55
00:02:41,639 --> 00:02:47,320
Speaker 5: Okay, I guess I could elaborate and say, keep in mind,

56
00:02:48,120 --> 00:02:53,160
Speaker 5: See I was born without my biological father. So the

57
00:02:53,200 --> 00:02:55,200
Speaker 5: first day I met Coorn, the first day I held

58
00:02:55,240 --> 00:02:58,600
Speaker 5: Corn bro my life changed and I knew that.

59
00:03:00,320 --> 00:03:02,040
Speaker 4: My dad fell shut up with me. It wasn't gonna

60
00:03:02,040 --> 00:03:03,560
Speaker 4: happen with me and my kid or kids.

61
00:03:03,760 --> 00:03:06,560
Speaker 5: You follow me, and you have to realize I've been

62
00:03:06,560 --> 00:03:11,480
Speaker 5: in corn life since day one up until his transition.

63
00:03:12,680 --> 00:03:15,120
Speaker 5: And what you have to realize is as a parent,

64
00:03:15,680 --> 00:03:18,600
Speaker 5: you can only raise a child. You call me and

65
00:03:18,760 --> 00:03:21,080
Speaker 5: as you do your best, which I did, and you

66
00:03:21,120 --> 00:03:21,760
Speaker 5: give advice.

67
00:03:22,000 --> 00:03:22,160
Speaker 4: You know.

68
00:03:22,200 --> 00:03:24,079
Speaker 5: I have to tell people like Corn was thirty four,

69
00:03:24,120 --> 00:03:28,840
Speaker 5: he wasn't fourteen. We used to have conversations and I

70
00:03:28,880 --> 00:03:31,120
Speaker 5: would be like, you know, like, hey man, whatever you're

71
00:03:31,160 --> 00:03:34,280
Speaker 5: going through, yeah, I'm saying in a po bottle, a

72
00:03:34,280 --> 00:03:37,920
Speaker 5: liquor bottle, or a syrup bottle. You follow me, and

73
00:03:37,960 --> 00:03:39,120
Speaker 5: at the end of the day, you know, like when

74
00:03:39,120 --> 00:03:41,560
Speaker 5: you had them conversations and you let your child know, hey,

75
00:03:41,560 --> 00:03:44,520
Speaker 5: I'm here for you. You know, I'm an ride with you.

76
00:03:44,640 --> 00:03:46,320
Speaker 5: But at the end of the day, it was my

77
00:03:46,520 --> 00:03:50,600
Speaker 5: responsibility to make him a man. I can't hold his

78
00:03:50,720 --> 00:03:53,400
Speaker 5: hand and say do this and do that. And during

79
00:03:53,440 --> 00:03:55,400
Speaker 5: those times for when you see your kid in a

80
00:03:55,480 --> 00:03:57,560
Speaker 5: dark space, which I saw Corn in a dark space,

81
00:03:57,560 --> 00:04:00,880
Speaker 5: I would never deny that. Those are the times I prayed.

82
00:04:01,200 --> 00:04:02,800
Speaker 5: You know what I'm saying. I just prayed. And you know,

83
00:04:03,440 --> 00:04:09,000
Speaker 5: for the most part, I don't have guilt. I don't

84
00:04:09,040 --> 00:04:12,640
Speaker 5: have sorrow. If you see me crying or you see

85
00:04:12,680 --> 00:04:15,200
Speaker 5: me down, it's because I miss him in the flesh.

86
00:04:15,400 --> 00:04:18,359
Speaker 5: As far as being a parent, I went beyond the

87
00:04:18,440 --> 00:04:20,559
Speaker 5: call of dud, you know what I'm saying, Like cornn

88
00:04:20,640 --> 00:04:23,520
Speaker 5: Corn didn't know about paying bills. Corn a lot of

89
00:04:23,880 --> 00:04:26,480
Speaker 5: And I used to tell my tell bro, we created this.

90
00:04:28,240 --> 00:04:33,120
Speaker 5: And I'm cool with you know my position as a dad. Hindsight,

91
00:04:33,240 --> 00:04:34,320
Speaker 5: Could I have done more?

92
00:04:35,560 --> 00:04:35,920
Speaker 4: Sure?

93
00:04:36,400 --> 00:04:39,200
Speaker 5: I know I could have me Mike Cook, could out

94
00:04:39,240 --> 00:04:41,920
Speaker 5: have like just went and got him in the headlock.

95
00:04:42,160 --> 00:04:44,799
Speaker 5: You know what I'm saying, Like I've set up therapy

96
00:04:44,839 --> 00:04:46,560
Speaker 5: for him. You know, he won a few times, you

97
00:04:46,600 --> 00:04:48,000
Speaker 5: know what I'm saying, But at the end of the day,

98
00:04:48,560 --> 00:04:51,479
Speaker 5: you have to allow a person to be who they are,

99
00:04:51,839 --> 00:04:53,120
Speaker 5: you know, and then at the end of the day,

100
00:04:53,160 --> 00:04:55,159
Speaker 5: guess what, I got a life.

101
00:04:55,520 --> 00:04:56,120
Speaker 4: You know what I'm saying.

102
00:04:56,120 --> 00:04:59,320
Speaker 5: I can't dedicate one percent of my time and I've

103
00:04:59,360 --> 00:05:01,960
Speaker 5: done that so much much of my life, so you know,

104
00:05:02,040 --> 00:05:03,479
Speaker 5: you get to a point where it just have to

105
00:05:03,480 --> 00:05:05,840
Speaker 5: be like, you know what, I love you, I pray

106
00:05:05,960 --> 00:05:08,640
Speaker 5: for you. But at the end of the day, I

107
00:05:08,680 --> 00:05:10,960
Speaker 5: can stand ten toes down and say, as far as

108
00:05:11,040 --> 00:05:14,000
Speaker 5: being a dad, man, Nick can't touch me with that.

109
00:05:14,640 --> 00:05:16,920
Speaker 1: What do you think put him in that dark space?

110
00:05:16,960 --> 00:05:19,680
Speaker 1: Would you say?

111
00:05:20,560 --> 00:05:22,360
Speaker 4: Corn was full of excuses?

112
00:05:22,400 --> 00:05:22,640
Speaker 7: Man?

113
00:05:24,520 --> 00:05:26,159
Speaker 4: Corn was the type of kid you don't do just

114
00:05:26,240 --> 00:05:33,000
Speaker 4: enough to get by. So I would say, the industry,

115
00:05:34,600 --> 00:05:37,719
Speaker 4: you know what I'm saying, And I'll call an asa

116
00:05:37,920 --> 00:05:41,040
Speaker 4: on a spade a spade. You know, the separation with

117
00:05:41,200 --> 00:05:43,800
Speaker 4: him and Thug took a toll on him, man, you know,

118
00:05:44,000 --> 00:05:46,280
Speaker 4: right like like when they when they went their separate ways,

119
00:05:46,560 --> 00:05:48,760
Speaker 4: you know what I'm saying, And you know, like a

120
00:05:48,800 --> 00:05:52,480
Speaker 4: lot of the industry didn't funk with that's just yeah,

121
00:05:52,520 --> 00:05:55,040
Speaker 4: you know, yeah, you said it right picked sides.

122
00:05:55,120 --> 00:05:57,320
Speaker 5: You know what I'm saying. And you know, as a

123
00:05:57,400 --> 00:05:59,560
Speaker 5: dad man, you know you you could see the hurt

124
00:06:00,240 --> 00:06:03,800
Speaker 5: and he's human, you know what I'm saying. And you know,

125
00:06:03,920 --> 00:06:08,080
Speaker 5: like being in situations that you know not beneficial, man,

126
00:06:08,120 --> 00:06:11,200
Speaker 5: but you just there. You know, shit, we all been

127
00:06:11,240 --> 00:06:12,240
Speaker 5: there and done that before.

128
00:06:12,279 --> 00:06:12,479
Speaker 1: Man.

129
00:06:12,520 --> 00:06:15,080
Speaker 5: You know you know thish it ain't beneficial, but you're

130
00:06:15,120 --> 00:06:17,520
Speaker 5: still here, you know what I'm saying. Like when I

131
00:06:17,600 --> 00:06:19,760
Speaker 5: was growing up, man, and I went through adversity, I

132
00:06:19,800 --> 00:06:23,080
Speaker 5: was taught to pray. This new generation man that got

133
00:06:23,120 --> 00:06:25,440
Speaker 5: all these vices that they turn to. Man, you know

134
00:06:25,480 --> 00:06:29,120
Speaker 5: what I'm saying, and they think that's their outlet. You

135
00:06:29,200 --> 00:06:32,120
Speaker 5: follow me so like it's just a lot of hed

136
00:06:32,120 --> 00:06:33,920
Speaker 5: to do with the industry, man, you know what I'm saying.

137
00:06:34,520 --> 00:06:37,800
Speaker 1: Like what you do you think it was like trying

138
00:06:37,839 --> 00:06:40,599
Speaker 1: to stand in hot space? Like you know how it go.

139
00:06:40,720 --> 00:06:43,159
Speaker 1: Most artists go through this, like they come out so

140
00:06:43,360 --> 00:06:47,560
Speaker 1: hot and then you know when you ain't dropping in

141
00:06:47,600 --> 00:06:51,440
Speaker 1: in a while and you gotta go. You gotta still

142
00:06:51,520 --> 00:06:54,640
Speaker 1: be rich homing when you walk outside, but inside you

143
00:06:54,680 --> 00:06:58,400
Speaker 1: don't feel like you're doing your you know what I'm saying.

144
00:06:58,600 --> 00:07:01,280
Speaker 5: And that's a great to put it. But I used

145
00:07:01,320 --> 00:07:04,400
Speaker 5: to tell Corn, you know, like bro, you know what

146
00:07:04,520 --> 00:07:07,279
Speaker 5: come with the game when you chosen you gotta know

147
00:07:07,279 --> 00:07:09,640
Speaker 5: how to turn on the quantas and turn on rich

148
00:07:09,720 --> 00:07:09,920
Speaker 5: on me.

149
00:07:10,120 --> 00:07:10,760
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying.

150
00:07:11,160 --> 00:07:13,000
Speaker 5: And at the end of the day, like me being

151
00:07:13,120 --> 00:07:18,680
Speaker 5: older and watching from afar, I knew this shit was temporary. Man,

152
00:07:18,720 --> 00:07:21,560
Speaker 5: I know ain't nothing in life. However, man, so girl,

153
00:07:21,600 --> 00:07:26,360
Speaker 5: we're gonna do. We're gonna milk it doing our alloted time.

154
00:07:27,160 --> 00:07:30,239
Speaker 5: We're gonna put these chips up and when the time

155
00:07:30,360 --> 00:07:32,760
Speaker 5: come for us to pass the torch, we okay. But

156
00:07:32,880 --> 00:07:36,600
Speaker 5: as an artist, they don't see it like that. Forever

157
00:07:37,160 --> 00:07:38,440
Speaker 5: forever you feel what I'm saying.

158
00:07:38,440 --> 00:07:40,440
Speaker 1: But become a drug, that becoming an addiction.

159
00:07:40,760 --> 00:07:43,600
Speaker 5: It's an addiction because like you said, for you travel

160
00:07:43,600 --> 00:07:46,400
Speaker 5: the world, you know, people treat you like roy to

161
00:07:46,440 --> 00:07:49,920
Speaker 5: wherever you go, you fly first class, you eat the

162
00:07:49,960 --> 00:07:52,240
Speaker 5: best of foods, you stay in the best of hotels.

163
00:07:52,240 --> 00:07:52,480
Speaker 8: Shit.

164
00:07:53,040 --> 00:07:55,200
Speaker 4: I used to say, man, I used to see Corn

165
00:07:55,320 --> 00:07:56,040
Speaker 4: turn out ship.

166
00:07:56,120 --> 00:08:01,200
Speaker 5: I wish I could rapt and follow dollars brother for

167
00:08:01,360 --> 00:08:02,560
Speaker 5: thirty minutes of your time.

168
00:08:03,160 --> 00:08:07,600
Speaker 1: You don't feel like, Wow, they got couln't.

169
00:08:07,400 --> 00:08:09,480
Speaker 5: Have for twist this year all to me make a

170
00:08:09,520 --> 00:08:11,200
Speaker 5: thousand dollars.

171
00:08:11,800 --> 00:08:13,520
Speaker 4: They may have took two days for me to make

172
00:08:13,560 --> 00:08:15,480
Speaker 4: a ract. You know what I'm saying.

173
00:08:15,680 --> 00:08:18,600
Speaker 5: Shit, and now you got the you got the ability

174
00:08:19,680 --> 00:08:22,680
Speaker 5: to open your mouth. You think, Bro, you got a

175
00:08:22,720 --> 00:08:25,480
Speaker 5: forty five minutes sit may DJ go out there entertainer

176
00:08:25,480 --> 00:08:27,960
Speaker 5: for fifteen minutes and they.

177
00:08:27,920 --> 00:08:29,280
Speaker 1: Gonna put you up in the nice and shit.

178
00:08:29,440 --> 00:08:33,560
Speaker 4: Come on, man. So I used to be like, Bro,

179
00:08:33,640 --> 00:08:35,720
Speaker 4: you don't know what I went through to get where

180
00:08:35,760 --> 00:08:37,559
Speaker 4: I'm at. You know what I'm saying, And.

181
00:08:37,520 --> 00:08:40,480
Speaker 5: That's why, like man, like like this young generation understand.

182
00:08:40,600 --> 00:08:42,959
Speaker 5: You know that ship that we went through, Bro, the

183
00:08:43,000 --> 00:08:47,360
Speaker 5: sacrifices that we made. So it's like like you said, man, honestly,

184
00:08:47,400 --> 00:08:49,559
Speaker 5: man sometimes should be a good fan of curse man.

185
00:08:50,360 --> 00:08:53,120
Speaker 5: That should be a good friend, especially especially when you

186
00:08:53,160 --> 00:08:56,600
Speaker 5: come from like you said, you come from having a

187
00:08:57,080 --> 00:09:02,160
Speaker 5: good parent and having because it it kind of create entitlement.

188
00:09:02,640 --> 00:09:04,760
Speaker 1: You get what I'm saying. So you you always been

189
00:09:05,080 --> 00:09:07,800
Speaker 1: had somebody to have your back, so you feel like

190
00:09:07,840 --> 00:09:11,600
Speaker 1: you can relax because somebody got your back. I couldn't

191
00:09:11,640 --> 00:09:15,400
Speaker 1: never relax. It's like Nigga, if I relax. I'm gonna

192
00:09:15,400 --> 00:09:17,720
Speaker 1: be somewhere on my back on the street. You get

193
00:09:17,760 --> 00:09:18,960
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. So I ain't no relax.

194
00:09:19,040 --> 00:09:21,079
Speaker 1: You gotta go hard like you said, nigga. I gotta

195
00:09:21,120 --> 00:09:23,480
Speaker 1: cut nigga. Do like you said, nigga, I got done

196
00:09:23,520 --> 00:09:25,920
Speaker 1: to cut every I gotta be run to every car

197
00:09:26,080 --> 00:09:27,960
Speaker 1: like you said. You gotta sit there and cut every outlet.

198
00:09:28,080 --> 00:09:29,240
Speaker 1: I gotta run to every car.

199
00:09:29,600 --> 00:09:31,679
Speaker 4: And get what sitting at the barber shop. You gotta

200
00:09:31,679 --> 00:09:34,360
Speaker 4: hope and pray, motherfucker, pull up. You know what I'm saying.

201
00:09:34,559 --> 00:09:37,000
Speaker 5: You gotta hold and pray you meet your quota. You

202
00:09:37,000 --> 00:09:38,679
Speaker 5: gotta hold and pray that you get to be of

203
00:09:38,800 --> 00:09:41,040
Speaker 5: money and then have some money to say. But I

204
00:09:41,120 --> 00:09:43,720
Speaker 5: see like I ain't like me and coryn a conversation, man,

205
00:09:44,040 --> 00:09:47,199
Speaker 5: a few months for your pass, Like damn, man, everything

206
00:09:47,320 --> 00:09:49,319
Speaker 5: you buy me, everything I buy you, man, you take

207
00:09:49,360 --> 00:09:50,719
Speaker 5: it back and you tell me you don't want to

208
00:09:50,760 --> 00:09:53,760
Speaker 5: tell them coin. I ain't accustomed to that. If you

209
00:09:53,880 --> 00:09:55,840
Speaker 5: buy me some Gucci shoes, I ain't going to buy

210
00:09:55,840 --> 00:09:57,040
Speaker 5: the bell in the shirt man.

211
00:09:57,280 --> 00:09:59,199
Speaker 4: Not for me. So don't buy me that shit. Give

212
00:09:59,240 --> 00:10:01,680
Speaker 4: me some amacs on I don't.

213
00:10:01,800 --> 00:10:04,199
Speaker 5: I don't require all that, man, you know, like when

214
00:10:04,240 --> 00:10:06,719
Speaker 5: you call me and say pop, when you look at

215
00:10:06,720 --> 00:10:08,760
Speaker 5: the critic card man, I just bought me a watch

216
00:10:08,800 --> 00:10:10,200
Speaker 5: and I go looking it over and you spent the

217
00:10:10,240 --> 00:10:13,800
Speaker 5: filthy man at the lord have mercy money where I

218
00:10:13,800 --> 00:10:15,200
Speaker 5: call from all the.

219
00:10:15,280 --> 00:10:17,480
Speaker 4: Watch man like I ain't had it like that, you

220
00:10:17,520 --> 00:10:18,080
Speaker 4: know what I'm saying.

221
00:10:18,160 --> 00:10:21,439
Speaker 5: Like I worked for this paper man, and I used

222
00:10:21,480 --> 00:10:23,600
Speaker 5: to always be taught, Hey, man, work the good days

223
00:10:23,640 --> 00:10:25,280
Speaker 5: so on the bad was come, you be all right,

224
00:10:25,520 --> 00:10:26,199
Speaker 5: you know what I'm saying.

225
00:10:26,400 --> 00:10:29,000
Speaker 1: So so I would raise old school man. See now,

226
00:10:29,040 --> 00:10:31,480
Speaker 1: but the industry money is kind of like lick money.

227
00:10:31,640 --> 00:10:33,800
Speaker 1: It come easy. They let it go easy. See when

228
00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:35,800
Speaker 1: you work hard, this ship come hard. So it ain't

229
00:10:35,840 --> 00:10:38,040
Speaker 1: going it ain't going easy, that's right. You know what

230
00:10:38,040 --> 00:10:39,760
Speaker 1: I'm saying. My shit too hard for me to get.

231
00:10:39,880 --> 00:10:41,800
Speaker 1: Like like now niggas be calling at this ship. Was

232
00:10:41,800 --> 00:10:44,160
Speaker 1: different when I was in the streets. Yeah, this street money,

233
00:10:44,320 --> 00:10:47,720
Speaker 1: Yeah we get this ship plentiful because getting easy. But

234
00:10:47,840 --> 00:10:50,120
Speaker 1: now I get up and go to work. She ain't

235
00:10:50,160 --> 00:10:52,840
Speaker 1: coming easy. It ain't going easy, you know.

236
00:10:53,280 --> 00:10:56,520
Speaker 5: And and see that was always my mindset, like I

237
00:10:56,600 --> 00:10:58,520
Speaker 5: never want when to come out to the financer.

238
00:10:59,160 --> 00:11:01,040
Speaker 4: I never want to have no regrets.

239
00:11:01,559 --> 00:11:03,280
Speaker 5: I didn't want to say, damn, bro, if I had

240
00:11:03,360 --> 00:11:07,800
Speaker 5: a bought that dumb ass item, you know, maybe I

241
00:11:07,800 --> 00:11:10,320
Speaker 5: could have been in a better situation. So, like when

242
00:11:10,320 --> 00:11:13,480
Speaker 5: the paper started coming in, man, like Nigga had corn

243
00:11:13,600 --> 00:11:16,160
Speaker 5: on a salary. Man, you feel me like, hey man,

244
00:11:17,040 --> 00:11:19,760
Speaker 5: you're back in your money. This other money to law

245
00:11:19,880 --> 00:11:22,440
Speaker 5: have mercy money, man, And you know I would go

246
00:11:22,480 --> 00:11:24,320
Speaker 5: to them, Hey man, look I find invest in this

247
00:11:24,400 --> 00:11:27,040
Speaker 5: you want to be a part of. Yeah, So that's

248
00:11:27,040 --> 00:11:29,880
Speaker 5: how we started buying properties and stuff. I started putting

249
00:11:29,880 --> 00:11:31,839
Speaker 5: that money in dirt. Man, you feel what I'm saying,

250
00:11:31,920 --> 00:11:36,040
Speaker 5: baking lots of about the beltline and Airbnb's and and

251
00:11:36,040 --> 00:11:39,079
Speaker 5: and like back in the day when when when condos

252
00:11:39,080 --> 00:11:42,000
Speaker 5: were cheap downtown you know, bought a condo, you know

253
00:11:42,000 --> 00:11:45,320
Speaker 5: what I'm saying. So I was always looking at trying

254
00:11:45,320 --> 00:11:48,920
Speaker 5: to get my kids and grandkids ahead started, you know

255
00:11:48,920 --> 00:11:51,439
Speaker 5: what I'm saying. So that that's been my mindset for

256
00:11:51,600 --> 00:11:54,719
Speaker 5: as like just being disciplined, man, and just staying.

257
00:11:54,440 --> 00:11:57,000
Speaker 4: In my lane, bro, not worrying about what everybody else doing.

258
00:11:58,160 --> 00:11:58,400
Speaker 1: Shit.

259
00:11:58,840 --> 00:12:02,480
Speaker 3: Yeah you do know, Like but with the material items.

260
00:12:02,800 --> 00:12:04,959
Speaker 3: I know that you know it that you can never

261
00:12:05,080 --> 00:12:06,920
Speaker 3: repay the people that brought you in this word and

262
00:12:06,960 --> 00:12:09,320
Speaker 3: raise you. But that was probably his way of saying,

263
00:12:10,120 --> 00:12:12,840
Speaker 3: I'll give you anything, Pops, I do anything for you.

264
00:12:12,840 --> 00:12:15,199
Speaker 3: You know what I'm saying, because because you raised me

265
00:12:15,240 --> 00:12:16,480
Speaker 3: and you taught me how to be a man, and

266
00:12:16,520 --> 00:12:18,240
Speaker 3: you brought me this far. Now that I got it,

267
00:12:18,520 --> 00:12:20,680
Speaker 3: I willing to do whatever for you. But in response

268
00:12:20,720 --> 00:12:22,440
Speaker 3: you saying I don't need all that. All I need

269
00:12:22,440 --> 00:12:24,160
Speaker 3: is just my son.

270
00:12:24,440 --> 00:12:27,319
Speaker 4: Yeah. Yeah, Like at the end of the day, I

271
00:12:27,320 --> 00:12:28,360
Speaker 4: was raised by my granddad.

272
00:12:28,760 --> 00:12:33,360
Speaker 5: My granddad never gave me nothing, but he gave me opportunity.

273
00:12:33,600 --> 00:12:35,840
Speaker 4: I had to work for what I wanted. And my

274
00:12:35,920 --> 00:12:37,599
Speaker 4: kids were the same way that.

275
00:12:37,760 --> 00:12:40,319
Speaker 5: Just like Nick can't call me then ask for no money, nigga,

276
00:12:40,400 --> 00:12:42,240
Speaker 5: my kids don't even call at me for money.

277
00:12:42,240 --> 00:12:46,240
Speaker 1: Man, Bro, you just said this is my slogan. My

278
00:12:46,360 --> 00:12:50,319
Speaker 1: kids don't even add me like the rent money and

279
00:12:50,720 --> 00:12:53,240
Speaker 1: they figured out and guess I'm going to give it

280
00:12:53,280 --> 00:12:53,959
Speaker 1: to somebody.

281
00:12:53,720 --> 00:12:56,480
Speaker 4: Else and get what I just told somebody the other day.

282
00:12:56,559 --> 00:12:57,520
Speaker 4: Man as me and.

283
00:12:57,640 --> 00:13:00,600
Speaker 5: You gotta figure it out, brol me. I don't give

284
00:13:00,679 --> 00:13:04,120
Speaker 5: for what's going on brou for every problem, it's a solution.

285
00:13:04,240 --> 00:13:06,120
Speaker 5: My dad used to tell me, Hey, man, I don't

286
00:13:06,120 --> 00:13:09,040
Speaker 5: want to talk about the problem, tell me your solution.

287
00:13:09,920 --> 00:13:13,199
Speaker 5: And it was programmed in me, man, because at the

288
00:13:13,280 --> 00:13:15,920
Speaker 5: end of the day, man like I was so disciplined.

289
00:13:15,920 --> 00:13:18,080
Speaker 5: I ain't have room to mess no money up. Bro,

290
00:13:18,640 --> 00:13:21,600
Speaker 5: you feel me. I wasn't in the streets when everybody

291
00:13:21,679 --> 00:13:23,920
Speaker 5: was going left. I was going right when them nigga

292
00:13:23,960 --> 00:13:26,160
Speaker 5: would go on to Floorda kicking it and stuff and

293
00:13:26,200 --> 00:13:29,640
Speaker 5: going to Lake Lanill. I wanted to do it, but

294
00:13:29,720 --> 00:13:31,240
Speaker 5: I wasn't doing what they were doing. So I didn't

295
00:13:31,280 --> 00:13:33,040
Speaker 5: have the money they had, so I had to take

296
00:13:33,080 --> 00:13:36,400
Speaker 5: my little chips home put them up. But that discipline

297
00:13:36,600 --> 00:13:38,720
Speaker 5: panned out over the years. You know what I'm saying.

298
00:13:38,920 --> 00:13:41,240
Speaker 5: And another thing is to where people don't realize. One

299
00:13:41,280 --> 00:13:43,959
Speaker 5: of my partners told me, said, man, this fo coin passed.

300
00:13:44,320 --> 00:13:46,240
Speaker 5: He said, I saw a nigga told me man corn

301
00:13:46,280 --> 00:13:49,080
Speaker 5: and fell off. He said, I told nigga, I just

302
00:13:49,080 --> 00:13:50,720
Speaker 5: went to the Nigga house. Nigga got a one point

303
00:13:50,760 --> 00:13:52,319
Speaker 5: fired me in all the house and he got a

304
00:13:52,400 --> 00:13:55,240
Speaker 5: raif nigarad nigg got to escalating his draiveaway heir cats

305
00:13:55,240 --> 00:13:58,000
Speaker 5: swim pool. If that's falling off, I want to fall off,

306
00:13:58,280 --> 00:14:00,520
Speaker 5: you feel me. So the reality is, you know, in

307
00:14:00,880 --> 00:14:04,640
Speaker 5: society today, if you're not in the lin like, you

308
00:14:04,720 --> 00:14:05,520
Speaker 5: ain't doing it.

309
00:14:05,440 --> 00:14:06,560
Speaker 1: Attention to current.

310
00:14:06,600 --> 00:14:07,000
Speaker 4: Believe that.

311
00:14:07,240 --> 00:14:10,319
Speaker 5: So if they can't see it, you done fell I

312
00:14:10,440 --> 00:14:12,120
Speaker 5: was seeing a lot of people don't realize like the

313
00:14:12,160 --> 00:14:14,000
Speaker 5: way stuff was set up in structured.

314
00:14:14,840 --> 00:14:18,320
Speaker 4: Corn was spoiled by the money that was put up, man.

315
00:14:18,960 --> 00:14:20,680
Speaker 5: And you got to realize, man, when you got a house,

316
00:14:20,720 --> 00:14:24,400
Speaker 5: you got cars and everything paid for, and you don't

317
00:14:24,440 --> 00:14:28,280
Speaker 5: have monthly bills like the average person, and you still

318
00:14:28,360 --> 00:14:30,920
Speaker 5: getting your publishing checks coming in and stuff.

319
00:14:31,280 --> 00:14:32,160
Speaker 4: He didn't have.

320
00:14:32,120 --> 00:14:34,280
Speaker 5: To move, you know, like everybody else because at the

321
00:14:34,360 --> 00:14:36,720
Speaker 5: end of the day, like we just had them conversations,

322
00:14:36,760 --> 00:14:38,520
Speaker 5: you know, like, Man, you know you got kids, Like

323
00:14:38,560 --> 00:14:41,760
Speaker 5: Corn got a sign seventeen. Bro, Yeah, Corn got a

324
00:14:41,840 --> 00:14:45,840
Speaker 5: sign twelve. One of the beautiful things about it that

325
00:14:45,880 --> 00:14:50,360
Speaker 5: I'm proud of them. Before the transition, Man, he developed

326
00:14:50,360 --> 00:14:53,640
Speaker 5: a relationship with all his kids, a personal relationship with

327
00:14:53,920 --> 00:14:55,880
Speaker 5: you know what I'm saying, And everybody got their own

328
00:14:55,960 --> 00:14:59,120
Speaker 5: memories of being with their dad. Now that's that's rich

329
00:14:59,200 --> 00:14:59,440
Speaker 5: to me.

330
00:14:59,560 --> 00:15:00,560
Speaker 4: Man. You feel me.

331
00:15:00,960 --> 00:15:03,800
Speaker 5: The money, the material stuff, that's cool, but you know,

332
00:15:03,920 --> 00:15:06,000
Speaker 5: talking to these kids and you know, like they go

333
00:15:06,120 --> 00:15:08,880
Speaker 5: through it brouh. You know, like I miss my dad,

334
00:15:08,920 --> 00:15:10,880
Speaker 5: you know, like I talked to him, like let's talk.

335
00:15:11,640 --> 00:15:13,520
Speaker 5: What you missed. I missed my daddy picking me up

336
00:15:13,520 --> 00:15:16,880
Speaker 5: from school. I miss my daddy being in the swimming pool.

337
00:15:16,920 --> 00:15:17,040
Speaker 8: Man.

338
00:15:17,040 --> 00:15:19,400
Speaker 5: I miss my daddy making me do my homework. I

339
00:15:19,440 --> 00:15:22,520
Speaker 5: miss sitting down just eating with him. See that's that.

340
00:15:22,680 --> 00:15:24,560
Speaker 5: That's what I'm big on, man. You know, like if

341
00:15:24,560 --> 00:15:26,680
Speaker 5: you get it right with your kids, regardless of what

342
00:15:26,720 --> 00:15:29,080
Speaker 5: they do or how they come out, bro, because when

343
00:15:29,080 --> 00:15:30,720
Speaker 5: it's all said and done, you got to give an

344
00:15:30,760 --> 00:15:31,960
Speaker 5: account for your actions.

345
00:15:31,960 --> 00:15:32,160
Speaker 4: Man.

346
00:15:33,040 --> 00:15:35,400
Speaker 5: So so so that's just that's just how I look

347
00:15:35,440 --> 00:15:39,160
Speaker 5: at it, man. The money, the material stuff, that's cool, grateful,

348
00:15:39,720 --> 00:15:41,080
Speaker 5: but at the end of the day, man.

349
00:15:41,200 --> 00:15:43,840
Speaker 4: He's more so the morals and the badges and integrative

350
00:15:43,960 --> 00:15:44,520
Speaker 4: to me. Man.

351
00:15:45,040 --> 00:15:47,960
Speaker 5: So he had like more than one baby mama, right,

352
00:15:49,200 --> 00:15:51,280
Speaker 5: five kids, four baby mama.

353
00:15:51,400 --> 00:15:53,640
Speaker 1: So how you so so that following you? How you

354
00:15:53,680 --> 00:15:56,400
Speaker 1: how you juggling? So you got four baby mamas now

355
00:15:56,440 --> 00:15:58,800
Speaker 1: basically and why I can't deal with one woman never

356
00:15:59,040 --> 00:16:02,440
Speaker 1: left four of them? Everybody got their own attitude. And

357
00:16:02,760 --> 00:16:05,880
Speaker 1: that's a million dollar question. That's a great question.

358
00:16:07,520 --> 00:16:11,720
Speaker 5: And understand this, man, I buried a lot of my

359
00:16:11,800 --> 00:16:15,560
Speaker 5: family moments. I know the process, but wore I'm at

360
00:16:15,680 --> 00:16:18,080
Speaker 5: now this shit foreigner than me, Bro.

361
00:16:18,200 --> 00:16:18,640
Speaker 4: It's new.

362
00:16:20,240 --> 00:16:25,120
Speaker 5: I'm trying to do what's right, deal with all this

363
00:16:25,640 --> 00:16:28,360
Speaker 5: that that's been presented to me and grieve at the

364
00:16:28,400 --> 00:16:31,240
Speaker 5: same time. But I just look at it like, but

365
00:16:31,520 --> 00:16:35,480
Speaker 5: just keeping it the book, man, Like, hey, Quorn didn't

366
00:16:35,520 --> 00:16:39,760
Speaker 5: have a kid by hisself. Her kids with somebody. So

367
00:16:39,840 --> 00:16:43,200
Speaker 5: when you become a parent, you have to step up

368
00:16:43,240 --> 00:16:46,360
Speaker 5: and be a parent, you understand. And at the end

369
00:16:46,400 --> 00:16:49,440
Speaker 5: of the day, an the event something happened to a

370
00:16:49,600 --> 00:16:52,840
Speaker 5: mama or daddy, then that responsibility falls on the parent

371
00:16:52,920 --> 00:16:55,760
Speaker 5: that's there, and you have to think about all that

372
00:16:55,800 --> 00:16:57,240
Speaker 5: when you choose to have kid.

373
00:16:58,040 --> 00:16:59,480
Speaker 4: So my model real simple.

374
00:16:59,520 --> 00:16:59,600
Speaker 2: Bro.

375
00:16:59,720 --> 00:17:01,360
Speaker 5: If I can't do for all of them, I ain't

376
00:17:01,400 --> 00:17:03,480
Speaker 5: doing for one of them. Man, you feel me, it's

377
00:17:03,480 --> 00:17:06,040
Speaker 5: a it's an even playing field with me, man, if

378
00:17:06,040 --> 00:17:08,800
Speaker 5: they need me, and it makes sense I now, But

379
00:17:08,920 --> 00:17:11,960
Speaker 5: if it's for just like sure, I ain't with that, man,

380
00:17:12,440 --> 00:17:15,120
Speaker 5: I ain't with that. I'm gonna be here from grandkids.

381
00:17:15,400 --> 00:17:18,240
Speaker 5: And that's and I and like I know Corn would say, pop,

382
00:17:18,320 --> 00:17:21,240
Speaker 5: make sure my kids good. That's my number one part

383
00:17:21,560 --> 00:17:23,560
Speaker 5: making sure them kids set for life.

384
00:17:23,600 --> 00:17:26,240
Speaker 1: Man, I can't make sure the mama be sitting.

385
00:17:26,440 --> 00:17:26,480
Speaker 8: No.

386
00:17:26,760 --> 00:17:28,760
Speaker 5: I mean like like if they get in the hardship.

387
00:17:28,800 --> 00:17:31,320
Speaker 5: But if they get in a hardship black and they

388
00:17:31,640 --> 00:17:36,280
Speaker 5: trying and they handling their business and fall short, damn right,

389
00:17:36,280 --> 00:17:39,360
Speaker 5: I don't standing the paint. But but but if I'm

390
00:17:39,359 --> 00:17:42,400
Speaker 5: not here, still get me some money. You gotta get

391
00:17:42,400 --> 00:17:43,200
Speaker 5: you some money, man.

392
00:17:43,280 --> 00:17:47,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, I can't. I can't uphold your life down. No,

393
00:17:48,359 --> 00:17:50,040
Speaker 1: I can't.

394
00:17:49,760 --> 00:17:55,240
Speaker 5: I can't because guess what, I live on a budget myself, man,

395
00:17:55,840 --> 00:17:59,800
Speaker 5: So so care what I've accepted the fact that my

396
00:17:59,800 --> 00:18:03,240
Speaker 5: son ain't coming back and whatever he did or do

397
00:18:03,440 --> 00:18:06,439
Speaker 5: for others, you have to understanding coming back. So you

398
00:18:06,440 --> 00:18:08,960
Speaker 5: got to make adjustments, man. And if that means you

399
00:18:09,040 --> 00:18:11,200
Speaker 5: getting you a job, going to work, by all means

400
00:18:11,280 --> 00:18:11,640
Speaker 5: do that.

401
00:18:13,440 --> 00:18:15,679
Speaker 1: Let me ask you something you because and it's a

402
00:18:15,720 --> 00:18:19,359
Speaker 1: crazy question, but let me ask you, even though you

403
00:18:19,640 --> 00:18:23,280
Speaker 1: hurting and going through grief, whatever, do you feel like

404
00:18:24,240 --> 00:18:26,080
Speaker 1: him passing gave you some type of strength?

405
00:18:27,520 --> 00:18:31,520
Speaker 5: No doubt, no doubt because like Prime example. Man, like

406
00:18:32,000 --> 00:18:33,240
Speaker 5: I was in the tag. I was a couple of

407
00:18:33,280 --> 00:18:35,320
Speaker 5: months ago picking a tag of one of the vans,

408
00:18:35,359 --> 00:18:40,040
Speaker 5: and I ain't know this. Later the lady said you strong.

409
00:18:41,400 --> 00:18:44,320
Speaker 5: I said, you know me? She said, yeah, you going dad.

410
00:18:45,200 --> 00:18:48,439
Speaker 5: She said, I watch you from Afar. She said you

411
00:18:48,440 --> 00:18:51,360
Speaker 5: got hell of strength. And I told her, I said

412
00:18:51,359 --> 00:18:53,400
Speaker 5: it ain't me. Man like black Eye, keep it real

413
00:18:53,400 --> 00:18:56,000
Speaker 5: with sometimes broad wake up at six fifteen in the morning,

414
00:18:57,400 --> 00:18:59,280
Speaker 5: I look at the clock, Man at twelve or nineteen.

415
00:18:59,320 --> 00:19:02,919
Speaker 4: I ain't left out the bedroom, bro. Like days be

416
00:19:03,080 --> 00:19:04,840
Speaker 4: fucked up, you know what I'm saying.

417
00:19:05,400 --> 00:19:10,000
Speaker 5: So at the end of the day, I feel Corn presence,

418
00:19:10,920 --> 00:19:15,680
Speaker 5: you know what I'm saying, Like I feel him saying, Damn,

419
00:19:15,720 --> 00:19:23,000
Speaker 5: I'm sorry that you're dealing with this. But I'm here,

420
00:19:23,800 --> 00:19:25,800
Speaker 5: you know what I'm saying. And I can't get it

421
00:19:25,880 --> 00:19:29,399
Speaker 5: right every time, Bro, But at the end of the day,

422
00:19:29,520 --> 00:19:33,480
Speaker 5: as long as I do what's right in my eyes,

423
00:19:35,240 --> 00:19:39,000
Speaker 5: and I take time to listen to what Corn would

424
00:19:39,040 --> 00:19:41,240
Speaker 5: say or what God would have me to do, that's

425
00:19:41,280 --> 00:19:42,880
Speaker 5: all I can do, you know what I'm saying.

426
00:19:42,920 --> 00:19:43,840
Speaker 4: Like I know.

427
00:19:45,320 --> 00:19:49,119
Speaker 5: Here around Prime example, somebody gave me, you know them

428
00:19:49,160 --> 00:19:51,600
Speaker 5: little glass things with the people, you know, like your

429
00:19:51,600 --> 00:19:53,360
Speaker 5: loved ones. On with the little base with the light

430
00:19:53,400 --> 00:19:57,640
Speaker 5: on it. Land night, I was laying down, the lights blinked.

431
00:19:58,480 --> 00:20:03,000
Speaker 5: So when they blinked, I was laying in the and

432
00:20:03,119 --> 00:20:03,720
Speaker 5: it came on.

433
00:20:06,720 --> 00:20:08,399
Speaker 1: I looked. I said, damn, Corn.

434
00:20:09,680 --> 00:20:12,120
Speaker 4: So I lay down for a little while. So I said,

435
00:20:12,119 --> 00:20:12,800
Speaker 4: I fin to go to bed.

436
00:20:12,800 --> 00:20:15,800
Speaker 5: About one o'clock in the morning, I cut the light

437
00:20:15,840 --> 00:20:17,480
Speaker 5: off on the thing.

438
00:20:19,080 --> 00:20:21,159
Speaker 4: I woke up the morning about seven o'clock. Brother, light,

439
00:20:21,200 --> 00:20:22,119
Speaker 4: we're back on again.

440
00:20:23,760 --> 00:20:24,280
Speaker 1: What it is?

441
00:20:24,520 --> 00:20:26,720
Speaker 5: And I just know that be Corn, you feel what

442
00:20:26,760 --> 00:20:31,280
Speaker 5: I'm saying, Like he haven't come to see me, you know,

443
00:20:31,600 --> 00:20:36,000
Speaker 5: since he transitioned. I saw him, but we didn't get

444
00:20:36,040 --> 00:20:38,200
Speaker 5: to talk. And when I woke up, I'm like, damn,

445
00:20:38,200 --> 00:20:41,479
Speaker 5: why I wake up. But then when I was helping

446
00:20:41,520 --> 00:20:43,639
Speaker 5: one of my partners to the car in the dream,

447
00:20:44,680 --> 00:20:48,000
Speaker 5: and when I googled it, it said, if you see

448
00:20:48,000 --> 00:20:51,040
Speaker 5: a loved one and y'all don't get a chance to communicate,

449
00:20:52,160 --> 00:20:55,959
Speaker 5: and you with somebody else, he's waiting to have your

450
00:20:56,040 --> 00:20:57,080
Speaker 5: undivided attention.

451
00:20:58,320 --> 00:20:59,760
Speaker 4: So I take it for what it's worth.

452
00:20:59,840 --> 00:21:01,840
Speaker 5: Like I ride my bike five days a week, I

453
00:21:02,000 --> 00:21:04,520
Speaker 5: walked five days a week, I see all kind of

454
00:21:04,560 --> 00:21:07,399
Speaker 5: cardinals flying by. You know what I'm saying, And I

455
00:21:07,880 --> 00:21:11,040
Speaker 5: know that's corn. You know what I'm saying, Like the

456
00:21:11,640 --> 00:21:16,720
Speaker 5: pain will never go away. Hell, even even when I'm

457
00:21:17,000 --> 00:21:20,880
Speaker 5: think I'm doing better. That ship don't get it.

458
00:21:20,840 --> 00:21:24,880
Speaker 1: Can be, Nigga, it can be. It's simply I don't

459
00:21:24,880 --> 00:21:27,679
Speaker 1: even put everything on around you. I wouldn't give a

460
00:21:27,680 --> 00:21:29,520
Speaker 1: fuck what it is. You could ride down the street

461
00:21:29,560 --> 00:21:32,600
Speaker 1: and see anything. This ship is crazy. You can smell

462
00:21:32,680 --> 00:21:35,240
Speaker 1: some ship and remember where you smelled at when you

463
00:21:35,320 --> 00:21:35,840
Speaker 1: were with Heim.

464
00:21:38,160 --> 00:21:42,560
Speaker 5: I got a corn only daughter stays in Lakeland, Florida,

465
00:21:43,240 --> 00:21:45,280
Speaker 5: and she was doing a recital.

466
00:21:46,440 --> 00:21:48,920
Speaker 4: So I was excited to fly in and surprised at

467
00:21:48,920 --> 00:21:53,240
Speaker 4: the recital. Right, So I'm excited to go get dropped

468
00:21:53,240 --> 00:21:55,320
Speaker 4: off at the airport. When I get to my gate,

469
00:21:57,119 --> 00:22:01,879
Speaker 4: she tore me up. Bro, it's done on me. How

470
00:22:01,960 --> 00:22:05,119
Speaker 4: much time we used to travel together. You know, we

471
00:22:05,720 --> 00:22:08,480
Speaker 4: get to the gate, how we moved.

472
00:22:08,800 --> 00:22:15,359
Speaker 5: Yeah, see, I'm now our early coin tutes get you know,

473
00:22:15,440 --> 00:22:18,439
Speaker 5: like like I'm sitting on playing what Nigga, I'm nervous,

474
00:22:20,080 --> 00:22:22,399
Speaker 5: you know, like he come on like i'm't gonna make it,

475
00:22:23,200 --> 00:22:26,320
Speaker 5: and like I would always sit like if it's eight

476
00:22:26,440 --> 00:22:28,840
Speaker 5: rows in first class, I might get on the eighth row.

477
00:22:29,200 --> 00:22:31,320
Speaker 5: Make sure he on the second row, and I'm gonna

478
00:22:31,320 --> 00:22:33,440
Speaker 5: sit on this side so I can always look at.

479
00:22:33,400 --> 00:22:35,080
Speaker 4: Him because you know, first thing, he to pull his

480
00:22:35,080 --> 00:22:35,560
Speaker 4: hood over there.

481
00:22:35,600 --> 00:22:37,800
Speaker 5: They going to sleep, and I got to get him

482
00:22:37,840 --> 00:22:40,160
Speaker 5: up when they say raised your chair, backs up.

483
00:22:40,080 --> 00:22:40,480
Speaker 4: And all that.

484
00:22:40,800 --> 00:22:42,359
Speaker 5: So as you sitting in there, I put you just

485
00:22:42,400 --> 00:22:44,879
Speaker 5: playing that over and over again. She just fucked me up.

486
00:22:44,920 --> 00:22:45,080
Speaker 4: Man.

487
00:22:45,119 --> 00:22:50,520
Speaker 5: I'm talking about like memories like at my house, at

488
00:22:50,600 --> 00:22:53,320
Speaker 5: my mama house, you know, like he just everywhere.

489
00:22:53,359 --> 00:22:53,479
Speaker 2: Bro.

490
00:22:53,680 --> 00:22:56,760
Speaker 5: Like sometime I'd be like, damn man, nigga, sit in there,

491
00:22:56,800 --> 00:22:59,160
Speaker 5: chance to chop it up with me? You know, come

492
00:22:59,320 --> 00:23:01,479
Speaker 5: just lay cross to bed, you know, like you just

493
00:23:01,560 --> 00:23:03,959
Speaker 5: be like. But it be like, man, I guess it be.

494
00:23:06,000 --> 00:23:08,639
Speaker 5: I told Goots this one day. I said, Man, you

495
00:23:08,680 --> 00:23:11,560
Speaker 5: know all them meetings and stuff. We used to have

496
00:23:11,600 --> 00:23:13,800
Speaker 5: a corn house and you know, buy Chick fil A,

497
00:23:13,920 --> 00:23:16,240
Speaker 5: coming in and chop it up. And he be in

498
00:23:16,280 --> 00:23:17,840
Speaker 5: the booth. I come in here, be in the booth.

499
00:23:17,880 --> 00:23:19,680
Speaker 5: He stopped pop. I'll be out in a minute. You

500
00:23:19,720 --> 00:23:21,320
Speaker 5: know what I'm saying. I like when the nigga hugged me,

501
00:23:21,400 --> 00:23:23,119
Speaker 5: kiss me on my neck. You know what I'm saying,

502
00:23:23,200 --> 00:23:26,960
Speaker 5: Like all that shit you take for granted, man, because

503
00:23:27,000 --> 00:23:30,560
Speaker 5: you just realize, you know, I got time gonna happen again,

504
00:23:30,840 --> 00:23:33,040
Speaker 5: you know, just to see that, nigga. They ain't come

505
00:23:33,080 --> 00:23:35,560
Speaker 5: up in the phone, man, or you know, sometimes be

506
00:23:35,600 --> 00:23:36,479
Speaker 5: so fucked up at night.

507
00:23:36,560 --> 00:23:38,560
Speaker 4: Right, just go back and read old text messages. You

508
00:23:38,600 --> 00:23:40,159
Speaker 4: know what I'm saying, Papa, I ain't want nothing. I

509
00:23:40,200 --> 00:23:40,600
Speaker 4: want to tell you.

510
00:23:40,600 --> 00:23:43,080
Speaker 5: I love you, I appreciate you. You know shit, you

511
00:23:43,200 --> 00:23:44,800
Speaker 5: just wish you. I'm gonna tell you what you did.

512
00:23:44,840 --> 00:23:46,359
Speaker 5: I started to steal it, but I ain't take it

513
00:23:46,359 --> 00:23:46,639
Speaker 5: from you.

514
00:23:46,640 --> 00:23:47,760
Speaker 1: I respect you got it.

515
00:23:48,160 --> 00:23:51,720
Speaker 4: You got it. When I bed going, I was gonna

516
00:23:51,760 --> 00:23:56,240
Speaker 4: dry at her. I said, some shit you got leaving.

517
00:23:59,080 --> 00:24:02,919
Speaker 5: It was so the first time I had ever seen it,

518
00:24:03,000 --> 00:24:03,680
Speaker 5: you know what I'm saying.

519
00:24:04,280 --> 00:24:06,320
Speaker 4: I got to solute you for that. I had never

520
00:24:06,400 --> 00:24:10,880
Speaker 4: seen that. I had never seen that one before.

521
00:24:13,240 --> 00:24:18,120
Speaker 1: Always drive me around, ride real shit.

522
00:24:18,200 --> 00:24:20,920
Speaker 4: That was all I fucked with that for real.

523
00:24:21,040 --> 00:24:25,040
Speaker 1: No man, just man, we gotta switch give man dot

524
00:24:25,119 --> 00:24:25,800
Speaker 1: switch gives.

525
00:24:30,040 --> 00:24:34,840
Speaker 6: So I know, yeah, for sure. So I know that

526
00:24:34,960 --> 00:24:37,439
Speaker 6: like a lot of times, like when you're dealing with

527
00:24:38,359 --> 00:24:41,439
Speaker 6: rappers and people that are in the industry sometimes, like

528
00:24:42,119 --> 00:24:43,760
Speaker 6: the streets in the industry have a.

529
00:24:43,680 --> 00:24:45,000
Speaker 4: Tendency to mix.

530
00:24:45,240 --> 00:24:48,920
Speaker 6: And then a while back, you had a situation where

531
00:24:49,160 --> 00:24:52,920
Speaker 6: there was a shooting at your barber shop. So at

532
00:24:52,960 --> 00:24:57,680
Speaker 6: that point, did that ever kind of make you want

533
00:24:57,680 --> 00:24:59,800
Speaker 6: to go to coin and just be like, man, fuck,

534
00:24:59,840 --> 00:25:02,440
Speaker 6: did shit, We're not finna, We're not finna keep doing

535
00:25:02,480 --> 00:25:04,800
Speaker 6: this like this ain't what we're in it for. So

536
00:25:05,119 --> 00:25:07,800
Speaker 6: just we gotta figure something else out, or maybe like

537
00:25:07,880 --> 00:25:10,040
Speaker 6: go a different direction, or did.

538
00:25:09,880 --> 00:25:14,000
Speaker 8: You feel like, like Black said, was that the fuel

539
00:25:14,200 --> 00:25:16,640
Speaker 8: to make you want to go harder to show these

540
00:25:16,720 --> 00:25:20,000
Speaker 8: niggas like, hey, this ain't what we do and we're

541
00:25:20,000 --> 00:25:21,280
Speaker 8: gonna overcome.

542
00:25:20,880 --> 00:25:27,120
Speaker 5: This great question when I okay, it was two separate incidents, okay,

543
00:25:27,280 --> 00:25:29,359
Speaker 5: and I know people getting misconstrued.

544
00:25:30,840 --> 00:25:34,840
Speaker 4: Barbershop got shot up and then I got shot at

545
00:25:34,880 --> 00:25:36,719
Speaker 4: the barbershop apart.

546
00:25:36,800 --> 00:25:40,800
Speaker 5: Yeah, got your months apart, So keep in mind, But

547
00:25:41,000 --> 00:25:42,119
Speaker 5: you know, I'm at the barber shop.

548
00:25:42,440 --> 00:25:43,120
Speaker 4: That's what I do.

549
00:25:43,359 --> 00:25:46,800
Speaker 5: I've been there twenty six years. Bro appeal in the community.

550
00:25:46,880 --> 00:25:48,959
Speaker 5: Ain't never had no issue, never had no problems at

551
00:25:48,960 --> 00:25:53,400
Speaker 5: the barbershop exactly, And at this time cool and see

552
00:25:53,400 --> 00:25:56,040
Speaker 5: a cool one to me, I don't see him as

553
00:25:56,160 --> 00:25:56,760
Speaker 5: rich homing.

554
00:25:56,920 --> 00:25:59,880
Speaker 4: Yeah, this is just my son.

555
00:26:01,000 --> 00:26:04,400
Speaker 5: So when the shot gets shot up to be earnest,

556
00:26:04,440 --> 00:26:06,639
Speaker 5: I don't know where the fuck it come from, right,

557
00:26:07,440 --> 00:26:11,400
Speaker 5: But I ain't Joe blow dumb. I'm like, hey, man,

558
00:26:11,440 --> 00:26:15,000
Speaker 5: you got something going on on, know about and we

559
00:26:15,119 --> 00:26:21,199
Speaker 5: talked and when I got shot and I got to

560
00:26:21,240 --> 00:26:26,480
Speaker 5: the bottom of it, I wasn't really fueled by Yeah.

561
00:26:26,720 --> 00:26:30,480
Speaker 4: You know my mind. First of all, I always.

562
00:26:30,040 --> 00:26:34,359
Speaker 5: Looked at situations like this here, man, I can't act

563
00:26:34,400 --> 00:26:37,720
Speaker 5: off a cord. I have to look at if I

564
00:26:37,800 --> 00:26:41,160
Speaker 5: go out here and do something crazy, do something dumb, bruh.

565
00:26:41,680 --> 00:26:46,760
Speaker 5: It don't only affect me. Yes, yes, shit like a computer. Man,

566
00:26:46,800 --> 00:26:48,960
Speaker 5: if I get a virus, a lot of shit shut down.

567
00:26:49,040 --> 00:26:51,520
Speaker 5: But so so at the end of the day, like,

568
00:26:51,960 --> 00:26:55,920
Speaker 5: did it fuel me? No, Because I stayed in the

569
00:26:55,960 --> 00:27:00,439
Speaker 5: hospital seventy two days, black seventy two, I felt like

570
00:27:00,480 --> 00:27:02,639
Speaker 5: great with Milk and his shy car. But I kidded,

571
00:27:03,000 --> 00:27:06,879
Speaker 5: I got nigga. I got hit more than seventys But

572
00:27:07,080 --> 00:27:10,360
Speaker 5: I get it. But I'm gonna tell you what message

573
00:27:10,400 --> 00:27:13,920
Speaker 5: I got out of it. Yeah, I had a house

574
00:27:13,960 --> 00:27:20,000
Speaker 5: in Stone Mountain. I was raised on Grisham Road. I

575
00:27:20,080 --> 00:27:23,399
Speaker 5: used to ride past Gresham every day to go to

576
00:27:23,480 --> 00:27:27,399
Speaker 5: Stone Mountain. The lady that raised me, my grandmother, who

577
00:27:27,440 --> 00:27:29,880
Speaker 5: I look at as my mother, she stayed on Gresham

578
00:27:29,960 --> 00:27:35,399
Speaker 5: Road no matter how tired I was or what I

579
00:27:35,440 --> 00:27:38,639
Speaker 5: had going on. Long as I was helping Mama financially,

580
00:27:38,680 --> 00:27:42,520
Speaker 5: I felt like I was doing my part. But when

581
00:27:42,560 --> 00:27:46,639
Speaker 5: I was in that hospital, I lost her. She passed

582
00:27:46,680 --> 00:27:49,280
Speaker 5: while I was in the hospital, and I know she

583
00:27:49,400 --> 00:27:53,159
Speaker 5: worried herself to death. So I looked at it like,

584
00:27:53,240 --> 00:27:55,399
Speaker 5: you know what did God? We're shoing you man, what

585
00:27:55,520 --> 00:27:58,320
Speaker 5: you think important and important? You know what I'm saying.

586
00:27:59,080 --> 00:28:02,800
Speaker 5: And that same house that I ride, that I rode by,

587
00:28:04,000 --> 00:28:08,000
Speaker 5: I literally stay in that house now. So no matter

588
00:28:08,040 --> 00:28:13,800
Speaker 5: what happened, I always think from a mature place.

589
00:28:14,080 --> 00:28:14,840
Speaker 4: You know what I'm saying.

590
00:28:15,560 --> 00:28:19,840
Speaker 5: Like my thing is, I can't let nobody play me

591
00:28:19,880 --> 00:28:23,439
Speaker 5: out my position. Man, You feel what I'm saying, because

592
00:28:23,480 --> 00:28:26,359
Speaker 5: because at the end of the day, like if I

593
00:28:26,440 --> 00:28:30,399
Speaker 5: go tat for Tator, you know, play the game that

594
00:28:30,520 --> 00:28:35,160
Speaker 5: be played, I'm playing myself in the end, man, even

595
00:28:35,160 --> 00:28:38,120
Speaker 5: if I don't do it, even if I she gonna

596
00:28:38,120 --> 00:28:39,000
Speaker 5: spin back to me.

597
00:28:39,160 --> 00:28:39,360
Speaker 1: Man.

598
00:28:39,520 --> 00:28:41,320
Speaker 5: You feel what I'm saying. And at the end of

599
00:28:41,360 --> 00:28:47,840
Speaker 5: the day, man, like I understand, I understand life. Man,

600
00:28:48,400 --> 00:28:50,120
Speaker 5: I understand what comes with it. And I used to

601
00:28:50,160 --> 00:28:53,040
Speaker 5: tear a coin like this shit come with the territory, man.

602
00:28:53,600 --> 00:28:55,240
Speaker 5: So you know, I can't sit up here and we

603
00:28:55,600 --> 00:28:58,320
Speaker 5: can't just take the glory out of it. Like my

604
00:28:58,440 --> 00:29:00,360
Speaker 5: past used to say, y'all see my glory, but you

605
00:29:00,360 --> 00:29:03,479
Speaker 5: don't know my story. It's a lot come with it.

606
00:29:03,520 --> 00:29:03,680
Speaker 1: Man.

607
00:29:03,720 --> 00:29:05,520
Speaker 4: You feel what I'm saying. Look at you, Look at

608
00:29:05,560 --> 00:29:06,320
Speaker 4: your transition.

609
00:29:06,400 --> 00:29:09,400
Speaker 5: Man, nigga, the bulls are probably big on your back

610
00:29:09,440 --> 00:29:11,520
Speaker 5: now that when you was in the streets. You know

611
00:29:11,560 --> 00:29:14,120
Speaker 5: what I'm saying, and you'll have to realize. Mike Tyson

612
00:29:14,160 --> 00:29:15,640
Speaker 5: said something that I live by.

613
00:29:15,720 --> 00:29:15,960
Speaker 4: Man.

614
00:29:16,760 --> 00:29:18,560
Speaker 5: Mike say this shit years ago. He said, just as

615
00:29:18,600 --> 00:29:20,400
Speaker 5: hard as I work to do right, the DEVI would

616
00:29:20,400 --> 00:29:21,920
Speaker 5: work twice, it's hard to get me to do wrong.

617
00:29:22,040 --> 00:29:22,200
Speaker 1: Man.

618
00:29:22,560 --> 00:29:24,960
Speaker 5: And guess what I put that in my life. So

619
00:29:25,320 --> 00:29:27,400
Speaker 5: when I'm trying to go to straight and narrow path,

620
00:29:27,600 --> 00:29:31,160
Speaker 5: I know what opposition come fact. And the crazy part

621
00:29:31,160 --> 00:29:33,680
Speaker 5: about a lot of time, be the motherfucker closest to you, bro.

622
00:29:34,440 --> 00:29:37,959
Speaker 5: You feel so like we were speaking on like now bro,

623
00:29:38,200 --> 00:29:41,480
Speaker 5: Like if I can leave without corn Bro, and leave

624
00:29:41,560 --> 00:29:44,600
Speaker 5: without my mom and my dad and my brother bro,

625
00:29:45,600 --> 00:29:48,959
Speaker 5: nothing else matter, man, whether it's a woman, whether it's

626
00:29:49,000 --> 00:29:52,560
Speaker 5: a relationship, whether it's a business deal. Hey bro, listen,

627
00:29:53,200 --> 00:29:55,720
Speaker 5: long as I wake up the next ya got a chance, man.

628
00:29:55,600 --> 00:29:57,160
Speaker 1: That's what I was speaking on. And I asked you

629
00:29:57,200 --> 00:30:01,920
Speaker 1: about strength like it be. You be going through it

630
00:30:02,040 --> 00:30:05,000
Speaker 1: mentally big and your heart be broken and ship, but

631
00:30:05,800 --> 00:30:07,360
Speaker 1: you really be getting stressed.

632
00:30:07,560 --> 00:30:08,680
Speaker 4: You get stressed because you.

633
00:30:08,680 --> 00:30:12,200
Speaker 1: Know, I know, like the worst thing has happened and

634
00:30:12,280 --> 00:30:16,040
Speaker 1: I'm living. Hey man, I'm built the last And guess what,

635
00:30:16,120 --> 00:30:18,360
Speaker 1: that's how that shit goes. Even though I hurt every day,

636
00:30:18,440 --> 00:30:20,800
Speaker 1: I cry every day. I think about this ship every day,

637
00:30:21,200 --> 00:30:25,760
Speaker 1: but I'm still shame there, still living, still helped it.

638
00:30:26,240 --> 00:30:31,160
Speaker 1: So hey man, bitch, nigga, y'all get the fuck you

639
00:30:31,240 --> 00:30:31,760
Speaker 1: come and go.

640
00:30:32,160 --> 00:30:33,880
Speaker 4: Believe that I don't.

641
00:30:33,680 --> 00:30:36,680
Speaker 1: Care because I see I can survive without you, without you.

642
00:30:36,800 --> 00:30:38,640
Speaker 1: I survived without part of my heart.

643
00:30:39,000 --> 00:30:40,920
Speaker 5: You believe that nigga got a void that will never

644
00:30:40,960 --> 00:30:43,400
Speaker 5: be filled again. So so at the end of the day,

645
00:30:43,440 --> 00:30:45,560
Speaker 5: that that's how I look at it, Like he said, Nigga,

646
00:30:45,560 --> 00:30:47,440
Speaker 5: I have some day. Bro, I'm so weak, I can't

647
00:30:47,520 --> 00:30:49,800
Speaker 5: talk myself. But get what fail? You ain't an option

648
00:30:49,880 --> 00:30:52,520
Speaker 5: where I come from, I don't. I don't have an

649
00:30:52,520 --> 00:30:53,400
Speaker 5: option to fail.

650
00:30:53,480 --> 00:30:53,680
Speaker 4: Man.

651
00:30:53,880 --> 00:30:55,560
Speaker 5: You follow me, so I know at the end of

652
00:30:55,600 --> 00:31:02,200
Speaker 5: the day, ay boy, moan grown cluse. Yeah, but get

653
00:31:02,240 --> 00:31:04,520
Speaker 5: what one thing I would talk? What this shit called

654
00:31:04,560 --> 00:31:06,760
Speaker 5: life ain't gonna stop cause of what you're going through.

655
00:31:07,240 --> 00:31:09,440
Speaker 5: My granddaddy alwayd taught me it's okay to pause, but

656
00:31:09,560 --> 00:31:12,080
Speaker 5: you can't stop. So so I keep my pauses to

657
00:31:12,120 --> 00:31:15,400
Speaker 5: a minimum. Man, I'll guess what. Everybody love rich home.

658
00:31:15,440 --> 00:31:17,720
Speaker 5: But yeah, we're coming up on a year bruh. Next

659
00:31:17,760 --> 00:31:20,720
Speaker 5: month gonna be a year coin being gone. Get what, man,

660
00:31:20,800 --> 00:31:22,800
Speaker 5: life go home bruh. And I get it. And I

661
00:31:22,920 --> 00:31:25,320
Speaker 5: know my son mentality. He gonna come out of there

662
00:31:25,320 --> 00:31:27,440
Speaker 5: the cemetery, he gonna fuck with me, he gonna miss me,

663
00:31:27,480 --> 00:31:29,040
Speaker 5: he gonna go get attacked too or something.

664
00:31:29,080 --> 00:31:29,520
Speaker 4: Forget what.

665
00:31:29,560 --> 00:31:32,480
Speaker 5: He gonna still get to his bag. Man. And that's

666
00:31:32,520 --> 00:31:34,960
Speaker 5: the mindset I have to have too, man. Like you said,

667
00:31:36,520 --> 00:31:39,600
Speaker 5: with more responsibilities, man, And when you're trying to do right,

668
00:31:39,640 --> 00:31:42,920
Speaker 5: man like, more haters come with it. I may be

669
00:31:43,040 --> 00:31:47,360
Speaker 5: undeveloped more opposition since he passed. Forget what it don't

670
00:31:47,360 --> 00:31:49,920
Speaker 5: stop my mission. Man, I know what I got to do.

671
00:31:50,280 --> 00:31:52,360
Speaker 4: I know I got grand kids. Man, you understand.

672
00:31:52,560 --> 00:31:54,600
Speaker 5: I know I got other kids, man, Like I tell

673
00:31:54,640 --> 00:31:56,280
Speaker 5: my other kids like, Man, look y'all, y'all, I need

674
00:31:56,360 --> 00:31:57,440
Speaker 5: y'all to understand the man.

675
00:31:58,120 --> 00:31:59,200
Speaker 4: I might be a little bit.

676
00:31:59,080 --> 00:32:01,840
Speaker 5: More tight grip now, brof this new terror toys. But

677
00:32:02,440 --> 00:32:04,120
Speaker 5: if I call you man, I ain't trying to get

678
00:32:04,160 --> 00:32:06,120
Speaker 5: in your business. I do to make sure you're okay. Man,

679
00:32:06,160 --> 00:32:08,320
Speaker 5: You know what I'm saying. Coryn told me a long time.

680
00:32:08,240 --> 00:32:10,280
Speaker 4: Hey, Dad, you let do get away way more and

681
00:32:10,320 --> 00:32:11,440
Speaker 4: you let me get away with me.

682
00:32:11,680 --> 00:32:14,920
Speaker 5: But I told him I was learning this like like

683
00:32:15,120 --> 00:32:16,840
Speaker 5: I was learning with you.

684
00:32:16,840 --> 00:32:18,960
Speaker 4: You know like that, I know like like sometimes I

685
00:32:19,040 --> 00:32:19,600
Speaker 4: might have been.

686
00:32:19,480 --> 00:32:21,480
Speaker 1: Too too strong on you.

687
00:32:21,600 --> 00:32:23,440
Speaker 4: So I kind of easing up for a little bit.

688
00:32:23,520 --> 00:32:24,320
Speaker 4: You see what I'm saying.

689
00:32:24,680 --> 00:32:26,680
Speaker 5: So so like like man, you know, like, but but

690
00:32:26,760 --> 00:32:30,120
Speaker 5: one thing I'm I'm grateful for. Man, when I sit

691
00:32:30,200 --> 00:32:31,840
Speaker 5: down and I think about it, bro we got a

692
00:32:31,880 --> 00:32:35,240
Speaker 5: lot of memories. You know, we travel. You know, I

693
00:32:35,280 --> 00:32:37,200
Speaker 5: got to travel the world with my son. Man, you

694
00:32:37,200 --> 00:32:39,520
Speaker 5: know what I'm saying. Like, we had some good times. Man,

695
00:32:39,560 --> 00:32:42,240
Speaker 5: We went to fights. We We've been to Mexico a

696
00:32:42,280 --> 00:32:43,120
Speaker 5: couple of times.

697
00:32:43,120 --> 00:32:43,800
Speaker 4: You know what I'm saying.

698
00:32:43,840 --> 00:32:45,720
Speaker 5: So when you sit back and look at it, you

699
00:32:45,760 --> 00:32:48,920
Speaker 5: know thing my past used to always say, instead of

700
00:32:48,960 --> 00:32:52,000
Speaker 5: focusing on what God took away from you, focus on

701
00:32:52,040 --> 00:32:54,040
Speaker 5: what he gave you when he gave you that person.

702
00:32:54,120 --> 00:32:54,320
Speaker 1: Man.

703
00:32:55,760 --> 00:32:58,720
Speaker 5: The memory, the love, the respect, the honor that we

704
00:32:58,840 --> 00:32:59,600
Speaker 5: have each other.

705
00:32:59,680 --> 00:33:02,120
Speaker 4: Man, Like that keeps.

706
00:33:01,880 --> 00:33:04,120
Speaker 5: Me going too. Man, You feel what I'm saying, because

707
00:33:04,160 --> 00:33:06,360
Speaker 5: I know, like our shit was different.

708
00:33:06,400 --> 00:33:06,600
Speaker 8: Man.

709
00:33:06,920 --> 00:33:11,680
Speaker 5: You know, were we global to a certain degree? Did

710
00:33:11,800 --> 00:33:13,960
Speaker 5: we make three four hundred million dollar guess what?

711
00:33:14,120 --> 00:33:16,200
Speaker 4: Black? Where I come from? We wonon bro?

712
00:33:17,080 --> 00:33:21,000
Speaker 1: We want come from?

713
00:33:21,880 --> 00:33:24,479
Speaker 4: Like we won where I come from? Bro. Like So,

714
00:33:24,480 --> 00:33:26,560
Speaker 4: so I don't care what nobody's saying. You know what

715
00:33:26,600 --> 00:33:27,000
Speaker 4: I'm saying.

716
00:33:27,280 --> 00:33:29,480
Speaker 5: And I used to tell Coin all the time, and

717
00:33:29,560 --> 00:33:31,160
Speaker 5: I gave Miss Flowers. I used to tell him, Hey,

718
00:33:31,200 --> 00:33:33,680
Speaker 5: I'm gonna tell you something. What I used to say,

719
00:33:33,800 --> 00:33:37,160
Speaker 5: thank you, man, thank you for your talent. Because of

720
00:33:37,200 --> 00:33:39,440
Speaker 5: your talent, I met people I would have never met.

721
00:33:39,480 --> 00:33:39,640
Speaker 3: Bro.

722
00:33:40,360 --> 00:33:42,320
Speaker 5: I was able to go places I probably would have

723
00:33:42,440 --> 00:33:45,959
Speaker 5: dreamed of. Probably wouldn't have never went. And I used

724
00:33:46,000 --> 00:33:48,080
Speaker 5: to tell him I appreciate that, man. So it's like

725
00:33:48,880 --> 00:33:53,800
Speaker 5: losing him death is inevitable for all of us, man exactly.

726
00:33:53,960 --> 00:33:59,760
Speaker 5: But some of the things that personally I've been afforded, Man,

727
00:33:59,800 --> 00:34:02,080
Speaker 5: I feel wild be greatful to my son man and

728
00:34:02,120 --> 00:34:06,000
Speaker 5: God for blessing him with that talent. Man, And like, wow, man,

729
00:34:06,040 --> 00:34:09,720
Speaker 5: hey bro, like we won man, Nigga say we fell

730
00:34:09,760 --> 00:34:13,560
Speaker 5: off for whatever? Hey bro, listen, man, why come from man?

731
00:34:14,320 --> 00:34:16,480
Speaker 5: Getting up being at a barber shop at seven o'clock

732
00:34:16,520 --> 00:34:19,239
Speaker 5: in the morning, eight o'clock at night, hoping to make

733
00:34:19,280 --> 00:34:20,240
Speaker 5: four to five hundred?

734
00:34:21,440 --> 00:34:22,719
Speaker 4: How cuts were like they.

735
00:34:22,640 --> 00:34:26,120
Speaker 5: Were now, broy we were trying ten dollars, eight dollars.

736
00:34:26,160 --> 00:34:28,399
Speaker 1: You feel what I'm saying, y'all used to be.

737
00:34:28,400 --> 00:34:30,600
Speaker 4: Hoping to have two hundred for twelve o'clock. That's a

738
00:34:30,600 --> 00:34:36,319
Speaker 4: good day for I have it like that, Black. I

739
00:34:36,360 --> 00:34:39,959
Speaker 4: couldn't take appointment. Niggas first come first whatever?

740
00:34:40,080 --> 00:34:40,480
Speaker 1: Hear this?

741
00:34:40,520 --> 00:34:41,040
Speaker 4: Who get it?

742
00:34:41,080 --> 00:34:43,759
Speaker 1: You feel what I'm saying.

743
00:34:43,719 --> 00:34:48,319
Speaker 5: To the next before? Yeah, like like where I come from.

744
00:34:48,400 --> 00:34:51,680
Speaker 5: But it's totally different, man. So like in my eye, man,

745
00:34:51,719 --> 00:34:57,279
Speaker 5: we wonon bro. Like in society, y'all entirer th that, bro?

746
00:34:57,719 --> 00:35:01,560
Speaker 1: Do you think like like grief playing part your relationship

747
00:35:01,680 --> 00:35:03,600
Speaker 1: like with your with your old lady or whatever.

748
00:35:05,960 --> 00:35:08,160
Speaker 4: Most most definitely broke or like.

749
00:35:09,840 --> 00:35:11,040
Speaker 1: I'm a loner.

750
00:35:12,640 --> 00:35:17,360
Speaker 4: And then not only them sometime, bro, Like sometimes I

751
00:35:17,360 --> 00:35:18,000
Speaker 4: won't be bought.

752
00:35:18,040 --> 00:35:22,120
Speaker 5: Sometimes this needs my space, like like like like dealing

753
00:35:22,160 --> 00:35:25,120
Speaker 5: with with this depth, like I don't know how to

754
00:35:25,160 --> 00:35:28,040
Speaker 5: deal with it. Yeah, I see a therapist, but but

755
00:35:28,120 --> 00:35:30,359
Speaker 5: she can't stop the hurt. She can't stop the pain.

756
00:35:30,960 --> 00:35:34,279
Speaker 5: That's my time to dump. You feel what I'm saying

757
00:35:34,560 --> 00:35:39,279
Speaker 5: to get this ship up off me. But sometimes I

758
00:35:39,360 --> 00:35:42,520
Speaker 5: be feeling like, hey man, check yourself, break attitude fucked up?

759
00:35:42,640 --> 00:35:44,600
Speaker 4: You know what I'm saying. I know it be fucked up, bro,

760
00:35:44,760 --> 00:35:45,800
Speaker 4: because I be bitter.

761
00:35:46,400 --> 00:35:48,840
Speaker 5: You don't think sometimes I say out all these sliming

762
00:35:48,920 --> 00:35:51,920
Speaker 5: niggas in the street while my son, You know what

763
00:35:51,960 --> 00:35:54,560
Speaker 5: I'm saying, this nigga do this, this nigga do that,

764
00:35:54,640 --> 00:35:57,080
Speaker 5: But then my son gone, you know what I'm saying?

765
00:35:57,360 --> 00:35:59,960
Speaker 5: Or when I or like when I had them grain

766
00:36:00,160 --> 00:36:02,880
Speaker 5: kids over there, man and they in the bed sleeping

767
00:36:02,920 --> 00:36:04,760
Speaker 5: them up. You don't think I look at them kids

768
00:36:04,760 --> 00:36:07,719
Speaker 5: and be like, damn they daddy, go, man, you don't

769
00:36:07,760 --> 00:36:12,160
Speaker 5: think my heart hurt thinking about they Daddy? I got

770
00:36:12,239 --> 00:36:15,040
Speaker 5: one royal man spinning image of Coin?

771
00:36:15,160 --> 00:36:15,359
Speaker 3: Man?

772
00:36:16,239 --> 00:36:19,160
Speaker 5: Is that spinning image of man I'm talking about looking

773
00:36:19,200 --> 00:36:22,799
Speaker 5: at him jenlight raising corn all over again? And you

774
00:36:22,880 --> 00:36:26,399
Speaker 5: see the hurting that kid man? When you saw Coin,

775
00:36:26,480 --> 00:36:28,279
Speaker 5: you saw him. He grew up in the house with him.

776
00:36:28,320 --> 00:36:28,560
Speaker 2: Brother.

777
00:36:30,120 --> 00:36:33,399
Speaker 4: So I get caught up in the things like that.

778
00:36:33,480 --> 00:36:36,120
Speaker 5: But then I come back to rail and say, hey, man, listen,

779
00:36:36,640 --> 00:36:38,160
Speaker 5: heavy is the head to wear the crown.

780
00:36:38,400 --> 00:36:39,120
Speaker 4: You know what I'm saying.

781
00:36:40,040 --> 00:36:42,800
Speaker 5: You know what you got to do? So do I

782
00:36:42,800 --> 00:36:44,759
Speaker 5: ain't never been wanting to make excuse you. Man, you

783
00:36:44,800 --> 00:36:46,440
Speaker 5: feel me. I don't make no excuse.

784
00:36:46,480 --> 00:36:46,640
Speaker 7: Man.

785
00:36:46,760 --> 00:36:49,359
Speaker 5: I say life like playing cards. I don't play nothing

786
00:36:50,040 --> 00:36:52,439
Speaker 5: or whatever hand. I gotta make the best of it. Brother,

787
00:36:52,520 --> 00:36:55,080
Speaker 5: I can't throw it in. I got to try to

788
00:36:55,120 --> 00:36:57,200
Speaker 5: spread or get lower as I can give me a

789
00:36:57,200 --> 00:37:00,440
Speaker 5: better hand. So that's how I look at life. And like,

790
00:37:00,440 --> 00:37:03,160
Speaker 5: like I said, Man, with the things that I've been facing,

791
00:37:03,360 --> 00:37:07,399
Speaker 5: like man, I got an attitude. Brother, I never thought

792
00:37:07,440 --> 00:37:09,880
Speaker 5: I have, man, and sometimes be like fuck it.

793
00:37:10,560 --> 00:37:11,960
Speaker 8: So let me so let me ask you this.

794
00:37:12,040 --> 00:37:16,560
Speaker 6: With that being said, what are your thoughts on when

795
00:37:16,600 --> 00:37:18,920
Speaker 6: people say you're never supposed to question God.

796
00:37:22,360 --> 00:37:25,719
Speaker 5: I try to live by the Bible, and there are

797
00:37:25,800 --> 00:37:31,920
Speaker 5: times why I want to question him. But once again,

798
00:37:32,080 --> 00:37:34,680
Speaker 5: death is inevitentle for all of us man. And at

799
00:37:34,719 --> 00:37:37,200
Speaker 5: the end of the day, mister Crawford, I could have

800
00:37:37,280 --> 00:37:40,560
Speaker 5: with for years. You just tell me all the time, son,

801
00:37:40,560 --> 00:37:42,359
Speaker 5: the only way you don't leave here, you don't come.

802
00:37:43,600 --> 00:37:45,560
Speaker 5: But just as sure as you come here, you going

803
00:37:45,640 --> 00:37:49,120
Speaker 5: away from him. We all got that appointed time. Do

804
00:37:49,200 --> 00:37:50,359
Speaker 5: I want to question God?

805
00:37:50,440 --> 00:37:50,640
Speaker 8: Yeah?

806
00:37:50,719 --> 00:37:53,160
Speaker 4: Do Sometimes I have questions. I didn't tell you no

807
00:37:53,239 --> 00:37:53,880
Speaker 4: line say I have.

808
00:37:56,239 --> 00:37:58,799
Speaker 5: Disrespectful but but at the end of the day, like

809
00:37:58,880 --> 00:38:00,239
Speaker 5: sometimes I just be right.

810
00:38:01,680 --> 00:38:03,960
Speaker 4: How much more am I to endure?

811
00:38:04,520 --> 00:38:06,840
Speaker 1: I think that Bible scam you.

812
00:38:07,520 --> 00:38:08,120
Speaker 4: I agree.

813
00:38:09,440 --> 00:38:11,759
Speaker 1: They tell you everything just to make you feel like,

814
00:38:11,880 --> 00:38:14,759
Speaker 1: don't question God. I mean, don't don't question God. Don't

815
00:38:14,840 --> 00:38:18,839
Speaker 1: question the Bible. That because nigga, we always gonna have questions.

816
00:38:19,239 --> 00:38:21,080
Speaker 1: So if you tell you don't don't question God, that

817
00:38:21,200 --> 00:38:24,520
Speaker 1: means whatever you don't understand, whatever don't seem right, nigga,

818
00:38:24,560 --> 00:38:29,000
Speaker 1: just go for it because I said it. Because it's rope. Yeah,

819
00:38:29,040 --> 00:38:30,879
Speaker 1: exactly who heard God say? This ship?

820
00:38:31,000 --> 00:38:31,120
Speaker 8: Though?

821
00:38:31,200 --> 00:38:33,680
Speaker 1: Is what I want like I believe in God, wholehearted

822
00:38:33,719 --> 00:38:35,759
Speaker 1: without God and when none of us be here. But

823
00:38:35,840 --> 00:38:39,480
Speaker 1: I'm not finna believe in no book. It's a lot

824
00:38:39,480 --> 00:38:41,560
Speaker 1: of shipping them up for that resonates, and wein't gonna

825
00:38:41,560 --> 00:38:41,840
Speaker 1: start this.

826
00:38:41,960 --> 00:38:46,680
Speaker 6: I always say, transcribed and translations a great story.

827
00:38:46,719 --> 00:38:49,560
Speaker 1: I can tell a great story, like sitting here, he

828
00:38:49,760 --> 00:38:52,920
Speaker 1: told great stories about his son that resonate to make

829
00:38:53,040 --> 00:38:55,600
Speaker 1: us feel it, right, like yeah here, yeah, bro, Like

830
00:38:55,680 --> 00:38:58,359
Speaker 1: come on, I got stories that the same ship with Dave,

831
00:38:59,120 --> 00:39:01,600
Speaker 1: so like yeah, but I can't say that's the Bible.

832
00:39:03,280 --> 00:39:05,960
Speaker 1: Your story happened in his life that resonates with minds

833
00:39:06,400 --> 00:39:08,080
Speaker 1: Why this can't be the same type ship.

834
00:39:08,560 --> 00:39:11,560
Speaker 5: But go ahead, man, But I mean answer your course

835
00:39:11,600 --> 00:39:14,279
Speaker 5: and yeah, man, like I'm human, I definitely question them.

836
00:39:14,360 --> 00:39:14,520
Speaker 4: You know.

837
00:39:14,760 --> 00:39:18,319
Speaker 5: It's a lot of yeah because because guess what, it's

838
00:39:18,320 --> 00:39:22,280
Speaker 5: the most controversial book in the world, because everybody perceives

839
00:39:22,320 --> 00:39:24,480
Speaker 5: it different, you know what I'm saying. So I think

840
00:39:24,560 --> 00:39:26,719
Speaker 5: I think, like, yeah, I go to church, man, I

841
00:39:26,760 --> 00:39:30,000
Speaker 5: have a relationship with God. But I just try to

842
00:39:30,080 --> 00:39:35,000
Speaker 5: focus on what I can do, man, And and you know,

843
00:39:35,120 --> 00:39:36,440
Speaker 5: like get what benefit me?

844
00:39:36,560 --> 00:39:36,799
Speaker 4: Man?

845
00:39:36,920 --> 00:39:39,600
Speaker 5: You know what I'm saying, Like like I have come

846
00:39:39,760 --> 00:39:42,359
Speaker 5: say that, and I don't want to be judgmental when

847
00:39:42,360 --> 00:39:45,560
Speaker 5: it comes to your beliefs, your beliefs, your beliefs, and

848
00:39:45,640 --> 00:39:48,839
Speaker 5: I believe my belief Guess what we got to see.

849
00:39:49,080 --> 00:39:54,000
Speaker 5: That's what I'm gonna respect your belief respect mine. And

850
00:39:54,040 --> 00:39:55,880
Speaker 5: you can be like man that nigga stupid fun. But

851
00:39:55,880 --> 00:39:58,840
Speaker 5: that's just respect my belief. I'm gonna respect yours and

852
00:39:59,000 --> 00:39:59,680
Speaker 5: like that.

853
00:39:59,680 --> 00:40:01,799
Speaker 4: That that that's just how I try, you know, to

854
00:40:01,880 --> 00:40:02,680
Speaker 4: live my life.

855
00:40:02,680 --> 00:40:05,239
Speaker 1: Man, I just me personally. How I live my life

856
00:40:05,280 --> 00:40:09,239
Speaker 1: personally is I can't believe nothing. I don't fully understand

857
00:40:10,000 --> 00:40:12,799
Speaker 1: just who I am as a person. If you can't

858
00:40:12,800 --> 00:40:14,480
Speaker 1: break it down to me, make it make sense that

859
00:40:15,120 --> 00:40:16,319
Speaker 1: I can't it can't make sense.

860
00:40:16,360 --> 00:40:16,959
Speaker 4: That's just like.

861
00:40:19,320 --> 00:40:21,279
Speaker 1: I can't if it don't make sense. Man, I think

862
00:40:21,280 --> 00:40:21,680
Speaker 1: you're right.

863
00:40:21,719 --> 00:40:21,879
Speaker 8: Man.

864
00:40:22,120 --> 00:40:25,520
Speaker 3: For me, it's always like you said, I respect. When

865
00:40:25,560 --> 00:40:28,840
Speaker 3: you get to go in around the world, Buddhists, Muslims

866
00:40:28,880 --> 00:40:31,000
Speaker 3: and all this other stuff, it's still the same feeling

867
00:40:31,040 --> 00:40:33,680
Speaker 3: you feel like, Okay, this person believe in a higher power.

868
00:40:33,760 --> 00:40:37,080
Speaker 3: I'm not religious at all, none of them right, But

869
00:40:37,800 --> 00:40:40,200
Speaker 3: like he said, everybody gonna find their own path. I

870
00:40:40,280 --> 00:40:41,680
Speaker 3: just hope that you find your path.

871
00:40:42,640 --> 00:40:44,040
Speaker 4: That's all. That's it.

872
00:40:44,200 --> 00:40:47,400
Speaker 1: That's but the main ship that they try to dump.

873
00:40:47,200 --> 00:40:49,920
Speaker 3: On us, you can't. It can't get dumped on it.

874
00:40:49,920 --> 00:40:51,799
Speaker 3: It can't get dumped on you unless you're allowed to

875
00:40:51,800 --> 00:40:52,480
Speaker 3: be dump But if you.

876
00:40:52,440 --> 00:40:55,600
Speaker 1: Don't know as a kid, you don't know you raised

877
00:40:55,600 --> 00:40:57,759
Speaker 1: this way, people raised this way, So that's the way

878
00:40:57,800 --> 00:41:00,160
Speaker 1: you stay because you don't want to question your parents,

879
00:41:00,160 --> 00:41:02,839
Speaker 1: your grandparents and folks see the same way you don't.

880
00:41:02,960 --> 00:41:06,399
Speaker 6: It's like the same way you don't. Because a lot

881
00:41:06,440 --> 00:41:10,799
Speaker 6: of people view their parents and their preachers and all

882
00:41:10,840 --> 00:41:13,279
Speaker 6: that kind of ship the same way that they're taught

883
00:41:13,320 --> 00:41:15,799
Speaker 6: to view God. So the same way that you don't

884
00:41:15,800 --> 00:41:18,279
Speaker 6: want to question them is the same way that you

885
00:41:18,880 --> 00:41:22,719
Speaker 6: like feel kind of like afraid to question God. But

886
00:41:22,760 --> 00:41:24,080
Speaker 6: it's just like at the end of the day, like

887
00:41:24,120 --> 00:41:27,520
Speaker 6: you said, if it's something that you don't understand as

888
00:41:27,560 --> 00:41:33,160
Speaker 6: a human being, you are do some sort of understanding.

889
00:41:33,239 --> 00:41:35,839
Speaker 6: If this is something that you're being told that you're

890
00:41:35,840 --> 00:41:36,840
Speaker 6: supposed to live by.

891
00:41:36,960 --> 00:41:42,640
Speaker 3: Or or or my personal no middle man to me

892
00:41:43,040 --> 00:41:44,839
Speaker 3: or middle person to die. If I want to talk

893
00:41:44,880 --> 00:41:45,400
Speaker 3: to God.

894
00:41:45,400 --> 00:41:47,520
Speaker 1: I respect that. That's what I know. That's the one.

895
00:41:47,560 --> 00:41:52,680
Speaker 3: I read all these books, right because they're cool books.

896
00:41:53,040 --> 00:41:56,479
Speaker 3: But I'm not religiously binded to know what man.

897
00:41:56,800 --> 00:42:05,000
Speaker 1: No man like I'm telling you manship regular bank, because

898
00:42:05,520 --> 00:42:07,640
Speaker 1: that ain't how I talk. He he know how to

899
00:42:07,719 --> 00:42:09,080
Speaker 1: talk on the record. So if I get down and

900
00:42:09,120 --> 00:42:11,480
Speaker 1: there on my knees and start trying to speak in tongues,

901
00:42:11,840 --> 00:42:14,400
Speaker 1: what you fake? I can't even see this from you.

902
00:42:14,400 --> 00:42:17,560
Speaker 5: Because this is not even your bank, and you know

903
00:42:17,640 --> 00:42:20,440
Speaker 5: what it's you know, like when you look at it, now,

904
00:42:22,120 --> 00:42:23,399
Speaker 5: what what you just said?

905
00:42:23,480 --> 00:42:23,760
Speaker 4: Screen?

906
00:42:23,840 --> 00:42:27,160
Speaker 5: Like you got to have your own personal relationship because

907
00:42:27,280 --> 00:42:30,640
Speaker 5: like I ain't throwing nothing out there, bro, but church

908
00:42:30,760 --> 00:42:35,759
Speaker 5: so commercialized. Yeah, you feel like it's like everything is

909
00:42:35,800 --> 00:42:36,840
Speaker 5: about a dollar.

910
00:42:40,600 --> 00:42:44,239
Speaker 6: Where the pastor nigga shut the doors and locked the

911
00:42:44,320 --> 00:42:46,279
Speaker 6: door until the plates were filled up.

912
00:42:46,640 --> 00:42:52,160
Speaker 5: Like no security can hold me down locking a dope,

913
00:42:52,239 --> 00:42:54,320
Speaker 5: hey man, let me up out of him. Ain't in

914
00:42:54,400 --> 00:42:55,600
Speaker 5: the right place exactly.

915
00:42:56,600 --> 00:42:58,360
Speaker 6: And it's like going back to what you said about

916
00:42:58,520 --> 00:43:00,200
Speaker 6: the middleman and all that ship, like.

917
00:43:01,719 --> 00:43:03,480
Speaker 3: What like with what we do.

918
00:43:04,080 --> 00:43:06,800
Speaker 6: The only middle people that we have our ancestors, and

919
00:43:06,920 --> 00:43:10,719
Speaker 6: these are people that know us personally, that know what

920
00:43:11,040 --> 00:43:13,239
Speaker 6: we're trying to say, and that know like even if

921
00:43:13,280 --> 00:43:14,960
Speaker 6: we're not saying it the right way, they know how

922
00:43:15,040 --> 00:43:17,000
Speaker 6: to get it to him because they're right up there,

923
00:43:17,120 --> 00:43:19,439
Speaker 6: like with him, you get what I'm saying. So that's

924
00:43:19,600 --> 00:43:24,040
Speaker 6: like maybe that might be a whole other conversation, but like, yeah,

925
00:43:24,080 --> 00:43:26,239
Speaker 6: it's just it's it's a lot of it's a lot

926
00:43:26,360 --> 00:43:28,080
Speaker 6: of trickery.

927
00:43:28,320 --> 00:43:33,480
Speaker 1: Like just because we got him here, do you think

928
00:43:33,600 --> 00:43:35,560
Speaker 1: Corn up that with God right now? Tell the God

929
00:43:35,640 --> 00:43:44,000
Speaker 1: Man makes sure my PAP's good. Yeah, bugging man, get

930
00:43:44,040 --> 00:43:46,359
Speaker 1: the nigga some screen man pop got salt to day

931
00:43:46,400 --> 00:43:48,120
Speaker 1: on it, man, get him right for sure.

932
00:43:48,440 --> 00:43:50,920
Speaker 4: You know what I'm saying. I feel it. I feel it.

933
00:43:50,960 --> 00:43:53,319
Speaker 5: You know what I'm saying. I feel like the day bro,

934
00:43:53,480 --> 00:43:57,480
Speaker 5: and I be like down, something gonna happen to brighten

935
00:43:57,480 --> 00:43:58,200
Speaker 5: me up a little bit.

936
00:43:59,000 --> 00:43:59,320
Speaker 1: You know what?

937
00:43:59,480 --> 00:43:59,919
Speaker 4: What weather?

938
00:44:00,040 --> 00:44:03,840
Speaker 5: It's my grandbaby calling me, like I got my grandbaby

939
00:44:04,680 --> 00:44:06,680
Speaker 5: a Lakeland because she get mad when I say Orlando.

940
00:44:07,200 --> 00:44:10,560
Speaker 5: She'll call me like why you doing. I'll be like,

941
00:44:10,640 --> 00:44:13,560
Speaker 5: I'm good, how you I'm good? So what you do today?

942
00:44:14,280 --> 00:44:16,239
Speaker 5: And when I hear her voice, I see her brother.

943
00:44:16,280 --> 00:44:18,800
Speaker 5: She looks like Corn br So it's like when I

944
00:44:18,920 --> 00:44:24,360
Speaker 5: see them kids, I see him all over there, like

945
00:44:24,719 --> 00:44:27,000
Speaker 5: even even their man of realsm. Bro, you know what

946
00:44:27,040 --> 00:44:30,200
Speaker 5: I'm saying, Like their man of realsm, the way they move,

947
00:44:30,320 --> 00:44:32,640
Speaker 5: and I just be like, you know, Lord, I thank

948
00:44:32,719 --> 00:44:35,480
Speaker 5: you for me just being able to see this. I

949
00:44:35,480 --> 00:44:37,279
Speaker 5: don't know when my time up, man, you know what

950
00:44:37,280 --> 00:44:41,200
Speaker 5: I'm saying. But like back to that Grease ship, bro. Listen, man,

951
00:44:43,400 --> 00:44:45,759
Speaker 5: when it hit it hit. Bro, I'm talking about like

952
00:44:46,600 --> 00:44:49,320
Speaker 5: I get to the point, man, well not get in

953
00:44:49,400 --> 00:44:52,160
Speaker 5: the car and go ride, man, And she mind a

954
00:44:52,200 --> 00:44:54,480
Speaker 5: little different, bro, because like you know, I don't.

955
00:44:54,360 --> 00:45:00,120
Speaker 4: Beard my brothers, my aunts, my grandmama, my granddad. You

956
00:45:00,520 --> 00:45:01,080
Speaker 4: deal with it.

957
00:45:01,200 --> 00:45:05,000
Speaker 5: You go to cemetery, you see him. But bray ever

958
00:45:05,120 --> 00:45:07,440
Speaker 5: being god damn sitting so over man and look at

959
00:45:07,480 --> 00:45:10,000
Speaker 5: your phone. Niggas seen some shit where they playing coin

960
00:45:10,120 --> 00:45:13,480
Speaker 5: at a stadium somewhere, you feel me, Or you just

961
00:45:13,719 --> 00:45:15,960
Speaker 5: ride and you hear a song come on the radio,

962
00:45:16,800 --> 00:45:19,840
Speaker 5: or you know, you just playing songs and you got

963
00:45:20,000 --> 00:45:23,440
Speaker 5: a playlist, and now he go, and when you hear him,

964
00:45:24,160 --> 00:45:27,920
Speaker 5: you like you start seeing a nigga smile, You start

965
00:45:28,000 --> 00:45:30,640
Speaker 5: seeing how nice he look and you just be like

966
00:45:31,600 --> 00:45:34,640
Speaker 5: Brud just saying like he just left so soon, brother,

967
00:45:34,880 --> 00:45:37,399
Speaker 5: or too soon? Like like you know I done heard

968
00:45:37,520 --> 00:45:41,720
Speaker 5: gone too soon all my days, maw when I lost

969
00:45:41,760 --> 00:45:44,319
Speaker 5: my son in reality to sit in that shit hit

970
00:45:44,480 --> 00:45:47,640
Speaker 5: different now, man, gone too soon? Going out to the

971
00:45:47,719 --> 00:45:53,000
Speaker 5: cemetery in the mausoleum. Man, when I touch his space,

972
00:45:54,440 --> 00:45:58,840
Speaker 5: shit move a little bit. I had mindset. Well, I

973
00:45:58,920 --> 00:46:02,000
Speaker 5: just want to rip that shit down, man. Man, Come on, man,

974
00:46:02,760 --> 00:46:05,839
Speaker 5: come on, get on man, like oh I JB want

975
00:46:05,880 --> 00:46:07,800
Speaker 5: her to say pop, man, let go. You know what

976
00:46:07,840 --> 00:46:10,680
Speaker 5: I'm saying, so so them the time, like when I'm

977
00:46:10,719 --> 00:46:14,919
Speaker 5: by myself. Man, you feel me like I tell people

978
00:46:14,960 --> 00:46:17,160
Speaker 5: all the time. Bro, I should tell Coin this man,

979
00:46:18,600 --> 00:46:20,680
Speaker 5: the decisions you make don't only affect you.

980
00:46:20,800 --> 00:46:25,279
Speaker 4: Man. And to see that I'm sitting there, bro.

981
00:46:25,760 --> 00:46:28,799
Speaker 5: I don't wish this shit on't nobody because it's one

982
00:46:28,800 --> 00:46:31,839
Speaker 5: of them cliches. Well, when you laugh, the world laugh

983
00:46:31,960 --> 00:46:32,200
Speaker 5: with you.

984
00:46:32,800 --> 00:46:35,600
Speaker 4: But when you cry, you cry alone. You know how

985
00:46:35,680 --> 00:46:37,000
Speaker 4: many at nights I crying?

986
00:46:38,400 --> 00:46:41,400
Speaker 5: Quick story, man, I told you I lost Meat eighteen

987
00:46:41,520 --> 00:46:42,760
Speaker 5: months before I lost Coin.

988
00:46:42,960 --> 00:46:43,160
Speaker 8: Yeah.

989
00:46:44,480 --> 00:46:46,440
Speaker 4: I used to sit and look at my mama sometime

990
00:46:47,680 --> 00:46:48,879
Speaker 4: and see the hurt in the pain.

991
00:46:49,000 --> 00:46:53,480
Speaker 5: On all right, you're behind me, cause that was her baby, boy, yeah,

992
00:46:54,440 --> 00:46:57,640
Speaker 5: and I would be like, I wonder how my mama

993
00:46:57,800 --> 00:47:03,279
Speaker 5: really feel losing something you bought in this world. And

994
00:47:03,360 --> 00:47:09,840
Speaker 5: then eighteen months later I got that feeling, bro, I

995
00:47:10,000 --> 00:47:12,680
Speaker 5: got that feeling. I don't have to wonder no more, man,

996
00:47:14,239 --> 00:47:15,640
Speaker 5: I don't have to wonder no more.

997
00:47:15,719 --> 00:47:15,879
Speaker 4: Man.

998
00:47:16,120 --> 00:47:21,160
Speaker 5: And it's like, man, Nigga sacrifice so much for his kids, man,

999
00:47:22,920 --> 00:47:25,480
Speaker 5: and then you start thinking like, damn, brother, I do

1000
00:47:25,600 --> 00:47:31,640
Speaker 5: all I could do? Or will this pain ever stop?

1001
00:47:32,880 --> 00:47:35,239
Speaker 5: I don't care where I go, I don't care what

1002
00:47:35,440 --> 00:47:39,960
Speaker 5: I try to do. I remember on one died in September.

1003
00:47:39,960 --> 00:47:44,440
Speaker 5: I went to Tuloom, Mexico, first of November, gonna get away, man,

1004
00:47:44,520 --> 00:47:46,720
Speaker 5: go clear my mind, look at me some water.

1005
00:47:48,440 --> 00:47:54,920
Speaker 4: I was just in a different location. Caught it right.

1006
00:47:56,760 --> 00:48:00,520
Speaker 5: It ain't going nowhere never, man, never, Like like I'll

1007
00:48:00,560 --> 00:48:03,040
Speaker 5: be telling people, man, I'm trying to adapt to my

1008
00:48:03,200 --> 00:48:08,520
Speaker 5: new norm. You know, when you talk to a kid

1009
00:48:08,680 --> 00:48:11,279
Speaker 5: ten eleven times a day, man, you know what I'm saying,

1010
00:48:12,080 --> 00:48:15,719
Speaker 5: parp sometime by nothing, by bout nothing, just just just

1011
00:48:15,840 --> 00:48:18,759
Speaker 5: what you're doing. Like I hate got to the point

1012
00:48:18,760 --> 00:48:20,880
Speaker 5: where sometimes Coryn went out some a car because it

1013
00:48:21,000 --> 00:48:24,719
Speaker 5: be business, business business, So I got to the point

1014
00:48:24,760 --> 00:48:26,719
Speaker 5: where I called be like Pop, what you I don't

1015
00:48:26,760 --> 00:48:28,759
Speaker 5: need nothing, so I just call tell you I love you. Man,

1016
00:48:28,800 --> 00:48:31,080
Speaker 5: I'm just checking on you. How you doing so, so

1017
00:48:31,160 --> 00:48:33,920
Speaker 5: we'd start building that report. Cause sometimes, bro, you get

1018
00:48:34,000 --> 00:48:38,680
Speaker 5: so programmed into the business you forget to like just

1019
00:48:39,000 --> 00:48:40,480
Speaker 5: you know, like be normal.

1020
00:48:40,560 --> 00:48:43,600
Speaker 4: Man. It's okay a person, Yeah, be a dad.

1021
00:48:44,080 --> 00:48:44,239
Speaker 2: You know.

1022
00:48:44,480 --> 00:48:46,480
Speaker 5: They don't have to be about work or business or

1023
00:48:46,840 --> 00:48:48,920
Speaker 5: money or like what you need to do or what

1024
00:48:49,040 --> 00:48:50,960
Speaker 5: you got to do all the time. Like like I

1025
00:48:51,040 --> 00:48:52,719
Speaker 5: got some texts on my phone where I text and

1026
00:48:52,800 --> 00:48:54,160
Speaker 5: one day I had went on to the house, got

1027
00:48:54,160 --> 00:48:57,320
Speaker 5: there about one o'clock, my grandkids came home. We was

1028
00:48:57,360 --> 00:49:00,839
Speaker 5: outside shooting basketball, and I shot a text like, man,

1029
00:49:00,920 --> 00:49:03,160
Speaker 5: I really enjoyed, you know, coming over there, just kicking it,

1030
00:49:03,239 --> 00:49:05,239
Speaker 5: you know, with you and Royal and he hit me

1031
00:49:05,320 --> 00:49:06,560
Speaker 5: back somebody all that, Like, Pop, I.

1032
00:49:06,600 --> 00:49:08,600
Speaker 4: Was sleeping when out fin the text. You the same thing.

1033
00:49:09,400 --> 00:49:12,960
Speaker 5: So sometimes we get so caught up into hustling, working

1034
00:49:13,040 --> 00:49:16,320
Speaker 5: and paying the bills. Nigga, forget to live, man, feel me,

1035
00:49:16,640 --> 00:49:18,520
Speaker 5: you got to live in the process of allady And

1036
00:49:18,560 --> 00:49:19,880
Speaker 5: that's just where my life at now.

1037
00:49:20,000 --> 00:49:20,160
Speaker 1: Man.

1038
00:49:20,200 --> 00:49:22,120
Speaker 5: Were Like like I said, if I want to do

1039
00:49:22,239 --> 00:49:26,440
Speaker 5: something like it, I'm doing it because guess what losing

1040
00:49:26,560 --> 00:49:30,160
Speaker 5: him showed me. Man, the shit you be thinking you

1041
00:49:30,280 --> 00:49:32,680
Speaker 5: got time to do, You don't have time to do it. Man,

1042
00:49:32,800 --> 00:49:35,000
Speaker 5: You don't have time doing. If you love somebody, man,

1043
00:49:35,080 --> 00:49:35,520
Speaker 5: let him know.

1044
00:49:35,640 --> 00:49:35,799
Speaker 1: Man.

1045
00:49:36,280 --> 00:49:38,880
Speaker 4: And and I share this on podcasts too.

1046
00:49:39,000 --> 00:49:39,200
Speaker 2: Man.

1047
00:49:40,560 --> 00:49:43,720
Speaker 4: If you got anybody around you, man, and you feel

1048
00:49:43,840 --> 00:49:46,480
Speaker 4: like them folks going through something, man, extend your hand.

1049
00:49:46,600 --> 00:49:46,759
Speaker 8: Man.

1050
00:49:47,760 --> 00:49:49,239
Speaker 4: Hey, brother, you don't want to talk to me, go

1051
00:49:49,360 --> 00:49:51,520
Speaker 4: talk to somebody because I see that shit on you. Man.

1052
00:49:51,680 --> 00:49:53,480
Speaker 5: You feel me talked one of my partner that a

1053
00:49:53,520 --> 00:49:55,480
Speaker 5: couple of months ago came back here to holler leve it.

1054
00:49:55,560 --> 00:50:00,400
Speaker 5: Man said, you ain't looking right, man. I said, bray,

1055
00:50:00,480 --> 00:50:04,040
Speaker 5: look rough, it's hell man, you canna find it. He

1056
00:50:04,200 --> 00:50:05,840
Speaker 5: been going through some shit man. He was like, Bro,

1057
00:50:05,880 --> 00:50:07,680
Speaker 5: I appreciate you pointing that out to me, though you

1058
00:50:07,719 --> 00:50:09,719
Speaker 5: feel what I'm saying. And I'm like, bro, I'm here.

1059
00:50:10,080 --> 00:50:14,160
Speaker 5: You feel me so like anytime, man, because like mental

1060
00:50:15,360 --> 00:50:18,520
Speaker 5: depression amongst black men is at all time high, bro,

1061
00:50:19,360 --> 00:50:22,399
Speaker 5: just like I said when Coin passed, man, like when

1062
00:50:22,480 --> 00:50:23,240
Speaker 5: I was raised.

1063
00:50:23,360 --> 00:50:25,600
Speaker 4: Bro, if you cry, you weaker, you soft?

1064
00:50:26,880 --> 00:50:29,200
Speaker 5: Od I got man, I realized crying is a sound

1065
00:50:29,280 --> 00:50:32,120
Speaker 5: of pain, man, And it's okay, brother, get that ship out,

1066
00:50:32,320 --> 00:50:33,719
Speaker 5: cleansing it just like.

1067
00:50:33,840 --> 00:50:34,480
Speaker 4: It cleans you.

1068
00:50:34,560 --> 00:50:34,719
Speaker 1: Man.

1069
00:50:34,760 --> 00:50:37,480
Speaker 5: Guess what, every time I shared a till for the home,

1070
00:50:37,600 --> 00:50:39,320
Speaker 5: I think about something we did and I and I

1071
00:50:39,440 --> 00:50:42,040
Speaker 5: and I get in my mold once I get myself

1072
00:50:42,120 --> 00:50:44,399
Speaker 5: bare right, and I feel better, man, because I got

1073
00:50:44,440 --> 00:50:45,239
Speaker 5: something out of me.

1074
00:50:45,400 --> 00:50:45,600
Speaker 1: Man.

1075
00:50:46,000 --> 00:50:50,560
Speaker 5: That shit lead the ulcers like heart problem, like stress, stress,

1076
00:50:50,840 --> 00:50:53,520
Speaker 5: nigga be carrying shit, bro be carving shit.

1077
00:50:53,560 --> 00:50:54,640
Speaker 4: I get what it be.

1078
00:50:54,840 --> 00:50:58,440
Speaker 5: So much pressure on a black man. Broh, you know

1079
00:50:58,560 --> 00:51:01,160
Speaker 5: you you you, You gotta fa family, you got kids,

1080
00:51:01,239 --> 00:51:04,040
Speaker 5: you got old lady, you got a job. People don't

1081
00:51:04,120 --> 00:51:06,600
Speaker 5: know what you go through because where you Superman in

1082
00:51:06,719 --> 00:51:10,160
Speaker 5: their eyes. But at some point, man, Superman gotta get it.

1083
00:51:10,239 --> 00:51:12,560
Speaker 5: Krypto nite. You feel me, So you gotta find out

1084
00:51:12,600 --> 00:51:14,919
Speaker 5: what your Kryptoite is. Man, And it's still that ship

1085
00:51:15,000 --> 00:51:18,160
Speaker 5: in you and I done learned saying coin gone me

1086
00:51:18,400 --> 00:51:19,480
Speaker 5: just being doing me.

1087
00:51:19,680 --> 00:51:22,840
Speaker 4: Man, you feel give a fuck who don't like what

1088
00:51:23,000 --> 00:51:23,359
Speaker 4: you say?

1089
00:51:23,640 --> 00:51:26,200
Speaker 5: That's fine because all of the year, bro, Like, I've

1090
00:51:26,280 --> 00:51:28,960
Speaker 5: been caring a lot of shit, man, and it's time

1091
00:51:29,040 --> 00:51:30,600
Speaker 5: me to take some of that off man and do

1092
00:51:30,719 --> 00:51:31,600
Speaker 5: what makes me happen.

1093
00:51:31,880 --> 00:51:36,279
Speaker 4: And I always hear my son saying, pop make you happy? Man,

1094
00:51:37,200 --> 00:51:37,919
Speaker 4: Now what I'm own?

1095
00:51:38,040 --> 00:51:38,120
Speaker 8: Bro?

1096
00:51:38,400 --> 00:51:41,280
Speaker 1: Hey, who would you say? Like was like from the industry,

1097
00:51:41,400 --> 00:51:44,200
Speaker 1: like the biggest support, like for the.

1098
00:51:44,239 --> 00:51:48,640
Speaker 5: Family through the transition period, keeping it shit all the

1099
00:51:48,680 --> 00:51:50,000
Speaker 5: way book Fly.

1100
00:51:50,680 --> 00:51:53,719
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, you know that for sure outside fly out.

1101
00:51:54,760 --> 00:51:57,920
Speaker 5: But see like me and Fly had differences. But he's though,

1102
00:51:58,000 --> 00:52:00,400
Speaker 5: but but but like but like as far as industry,

1103
00:52:00,440 --> 00:52:03,239
Speaker 5: and I'm gonna tell you that man. But he pulled

1104
00:52:03,360 --> 00:52:07,720
Speaker 5: up on me, man Pete. Pete called me quite naturally

1105
00:52:09,080 --> 00:52:12,840
Speaker 5: and gave his condolence. He was in Miami, and he

1106
00:52:13,080 --> 00:52:15,239
Speaker 5: a couple of days later he calm, like, wait yet,

1107
00:52:15,600 --> 00:52:18,760
Speaker 5: I said, Mama, he said, drop me that dreat. Nigga

1108
00:52:18,840 --> 00:52:22,120
Speaker 5: pulled up stayed over me two three hours. Let me know, bro,

1109
00:52:22,200 --> 00:52:24,680
Speaker 5: if you need anything, I'm him man, you know, like

1110
00:52:24,840 --> 00:52:27,800
Speaker 5: whatever you need, I'm like, bro, I'm good. But but

1111
00:52:28,000 --> 00:52:31,040
Speaker 5: but he pulled up and kicked with me for like

1112
00:52:31,120 --> 00:52:34,640
Speaker 5: two three hours and was like, you know, I hadn't

1113
00:52:34,640 --> 00:52:37,960
Speaker 5: planned to come hire man, but you know, out of respect, bro,

1114
00:52:38,200 --> 00:52:40,359
Speaker 5: I fucked with you and he came here like two

1115
00:52:40,440 --> 00:52:40,879
Speaker 5: three hours.

1116
00:52:40,960 --> 00:52:41,120
Speaker 2: Man.

1117
00:52:41,760 --> 00:52:43,279
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, that that that he did.

1118
00:52:43,400 --> 00:52:45,120
Speaker 1: Man, So y'all, y'all.

1119
00:52:47,800 --> 00:52:52,400
Speaker 5: We got what's gonna happen is we're working on another project.

1120
00:52:53,600 --> 00:52:56,000
Speaker 5: T I G working on the Greatest Hits project.

1121
00:52:56,800 --> 00:52:57,000
Speaker 4: Yeah.

1122
00:52:57,080 --> 00:53:00,960
Speaker 5: So so so they're closer with their completion and we are.

1123
00:53:01,360 --> 00:53:02,920
Speaker 5: So I had to talk with Fly. I said, Man,

1124
00:53:02,960 --> 00:53:05,440
Speaker 5: go ahead and drop yours and we'll come behind. So

1125
00:53:05,800 --> 00:53:08,720
Speaker 5: the Greatest Hit music. Yeah, we're putting out new musicals.

1126
00:53:08,880 --> 00:53:12,439
Speaker 5: We'll probably come in like November, and we're scheduling trying

1127
00:53:12,520 --> 00:53:15,920
Speaker 5: to saddle up and drop the Greatest Hits on Corn's birthday.

1128
00:53:16,640 --> 00:53:18,720
Speaker 4: Yeah. Yeah, so so that that's the next project.

1129
00:53:18,800 --> 00:53:21,120
Speaker 1: Man, what's the biggest things you want to see for

1130
00:53:21,200 --> 00:53:21,800
Speaker 1: his legacy?

1131
00:53:21,880 --> 00:53:24,160
Speaker 3: To keep his legacy going, maybe to tell the story

1132
00:53:24,280 --> 00:53:26,160
Speaker 3: on a book, a movie, a documentary.

1133
00:53:26,200 --> 00:53:27,879
Speaker 4: What's the biggest things you want to see?

1134
00:53:29,080 --> 00:53:29,440
Speaker 1: You know what?

1135
00:53:29,560 --> 00:53:33,960
Speaker 5: Scream? I'm so old school man. I think about it,

1136
00:53:34,040 --> 00:53:37,080
Speaker 5: but I try to get so tied up into that personally,

1137
00:53:37,880 --> 00:53:42,080
Speaker 5: that just like how people do stuff yearly, you know,

1138
00:53:42,200 --> 00:53:45,919
Speaker 5: to commemorate, which I know that's what the fans will want,

1139
00:53:45,960 --> 00:53:47,919
Speaker 5: and I know that's what society will want.

1140
00:53:48,400 --> 00:53:50,719
Speaker 4: So really, man, Money Tea and Dred them have to

1141
00:53:50,800 --> 00:53:53,200
Speaker 4: stay in my ear with that, man, because I'd be so.

1142
00:53:54,719 --> 00:53:57,280
Speaker 5: Out of the loop or I be still like fucked

1143
00:53:57,360 --> 00:53:59,719
Speaker 5: up grieving, you know what I'm saying, not saying that

1144
00:53:59,800 --> 00:54:03,719
Speaker 5: they don't, but I understand, you know, like I'm fifty five, bro,

1145
00:54:03,920 --> 00:54:07,440
Speaker 5: I can't relate to you know, what's going on today.

1146
00:54:07,880 --> 00:54:10,959
Speaker 5: So when it comes to things like that, like they'll

1147
00:54:11,440 --> 00:54:13,400
Speaker 5: you know, bring it to me and we sit down

1148
00:54:13,400 --> 00:54:17,520
Speaker 5: and chop it up and make them decisions together. But

1149
00:54:17,680 --> 00:54:21,640
Speaker 5: but but we do have a documentary that it's gonna

1150
00:54:21,680 --> 00:54:24,320
Speaker 5: take a little time to fine tune it, you know

1151
00:54:24,320 --> 00:54:28,279
Speaker 5: what I'm saying. But I think documentary, man, and my thing. Man,

1152
00:54:29,400 --> 00:54:33,720
Speaker 5: if I could see anything that I would want pertaining

1153
00:54:33,760 --> 00:54:38,560
Speaker 5: the coin, I'm so big on giving back man, you know,

1154
00:54:39,440 --> 00:54:43,879
Speaker 5: like having monety to call McNew hey, man, let's see,

1155
00:54:44,000 --> 00:54:45,080
Speaker 5: like let's get together.

1156
00:54:44,880 --> 00:54:47,080
Speaker 4: On scholarship in his honor. I'm on stuff like that.

1157
00:54:47,280 --> 00:54:47,879
Speaker 4: You know what I'm saying.

1158
00:54:48,080 --> 00:54:49,600
Speaker 5: We can go out here and have the cookouts and

1159
00:54:49,680 --> 00:54:53,040
Speaker 5: the barbecues and you know, do all that, but you know, like, man,

1160
00:54:53,120 --> 00:54:54,920
Speaker 5: you want to make an impact. Man, shit, I want

1161
00:54:54,960 --> 00:54:57,080
Speaker 5: to take a bag to the school and you know,

1162
00:54:57,400 --> 00:55:00,719
Speaker 5: these kids that might have a vision to be producer,

1163
00:55:00,800 --> 00:55:03,880
Speaker 5: an engineer, he go a bag like Corn play baseball.

1164
00:55:04,000 --> 00:55:04,600
Speaker 4: You know what I'm saying.

1165
00:55:04,800 --> 00:55:07,560
Speaker 5: We want to drop some money out for the sports department,

1166
00:55:07,680 --> 00:55:10,120
Speaker 5: you know, like if I see a bounder that say

1167
00:55:10,200 --> 00:55:13,000
Speaker 5: the Quantus Lamar, or if I see a plaque you know,

1168
00:55:13,200 --> 00:55:16,799
Speaker 5: saying that in honor of him. That's what I'm on, man,

1169
00:55:17,040 --> 00:55:20,560
Speaker 5: More so like giving back and impacting people lives, because

1170
00:55:20,719 --> 00:55:22,560
Speaker 5: Corn impacted a lot of people lives. You know what

1171
00:55:22,640 --> 00:55:26,240
Speaker 5: I'm saying. We're in the process now of putting together

1172
00:55:26,239 --> 00:55:28,520
Speaker 5: a situation for his birthday.

1173
00:55:28,680 --> 00:55:30,600
Speaker 4: You know what I'm saying. I didn't want to really

1174
00:55:30,640 --> 00:55:34,799
Speaker 4: get around the death date just so much because at the.

1175
00:55:34,880 --> 00:55:37,040
Speaker 5: End of the day, man, like this first death day,

1176
00:55:37,040 --> 00:55:38,880
Speaker 5: I don't know where I'll be it mentally, you know

1177
00:55:38,920 --> 00:55:40,640
Speaker 5: what I'm saying, And I might not be in no

1178
00:55:40,800 --> 00:55:43,840
Speaker 5: position where I want to deal with a lot of people. Bro, Like,

1179
00:55:43,960 --> 00:55:45,560
Speaker 5: I don't want to pull up with a fuck up

1180
00:55:45,560 --> 00:55:47,719
Speaker 5: out of studs, you know what I'm saying. So I

1181
00:55:47,800 --> 00:55:51,520
Speaker 5: feel like, let's like, let's come, let's celebrate the birthday.

1182
00:55:51,600 --> 00:55:51,759
Speaker 3: Man.

1183
00:55:51,840 --> 00:55:54,600
Speaker 4: You feel what I'm saying, The day that God gave

1184
00:55:54,760 --> 00:55:55,279
Speaker 4: him to us.

1185
00:55:55,440 --> 00:55:57,160
Speaker 5: You know what I'm saying, and who knows, later on

1186
00:55:57,320 --> 00:55:58,640
Speaker 5: we may get together and say, well, man, you know

1187
00:55:58,719 --> 00:56:00,439
Speaker 5: we want to do some stuff on the day he pad.

1188
00:56:00,520 --> 00:56:03,400
Speaker 5: But right now sits still so fresh to me.

1189
00:56:03,560 --> 00:56:04,520
Speaker 4: Man, you feel.

1190
00:56:07,080 --> 00:56:11,640
Speaker 3: What's one thing you would You can say it through prayer, spirit,

1191
00:56:11,680 --> 00:56:13,440
Speaker 3: But what's one thing you want to say to your

1192
00:56:13,520 --> 00:56:16,960
Speaker 3: son if you have a final conversation, another conversation and

1193
00:56:17,080 --> 00:56:18,000
Speaker 3: physical with your son.

1194
00:56:19,200 --> 00:56:22,600
Speaker 5: Knowing Corn and the way I raised him, Bro, See

1195
00:56:22,719 --> 00:56:25,120
Speaker 5: when Corn did sof to disappointment, he was still away

1196
00:56:25,120 --> 00:56:31,839
Speaker 5: from him for a little while, I would tell him

1197
00:56:37,320 --> 00:56:43,360
Speaker 5: I forgive you because I know him, and I know

1198
00:56:46,920 --> 00:56:55,759
Speaker 5: how heavy of a burden he carrying, knowing that we

1199
00:56:55,920 --> 00:56:59,920
Speaker 5: used to have a saying me and him, we all

1200
00:57:00,200 --> 00:57:05,160
Speaker 5: we got. And sometimes you know, like I just be like,

1201
00:57:07,520 --> 00:57:11,040
Speaker 5: damn Coin, you left me, Bro, you left me with

1202
00:57:11,200 --> 00:57:16,800
Speaker 5: all this to deal with him. Brian envision my son

1203
00:57:16,920 --> 00:57:24,760
Speaker 5: baring me. I envisioned my son getting older and pulling

1204
00:57:24,840 --> 00:57:27,240
Speaker 5: up kicking it with me on some grown man ship. Brouh,

1205
00:57:27,360 --> 00:57:31,480
Speaker 5: You feel me like I want it? I want it too.

1206
00:57:36,200 --> 00:57:38,480
Speaker 5: I wanted to have some time man while I was older,

1207
00:57:38,480 --> 00:57:40,360
Speaker 5: and we just kicked it and we talked about what

1208
00:57:40,480 --> 00:57:45,040
Speaker 5: we did. But the first thing. I was just telling him,

1209
00:57:45,040 --> 00:57:52,920
Speaker 5: I forgive your son. You know, I miss you and

1210
00:57:56,480 --> 00:57:59,560
Speaker 5: if it's God's will, I'll see you one day.

1211
00:57:59,680 --> 00:57:59,840
Speaker 2: Man.

1212
00:58:00,080 --> 00:58:07,880
Speaker 5: But I had some conversations, man, and I don't know

1213
00:58:08,000 --> 00:58:10,280
Speaker 5: if he be like sometime and like I hear that

1214
00:58:10,360 --> 00:58:14,160
Speaker 5: nigga talking to me, Bro, I don't know if that

1215
00:58:14,320 --> 00:58:19,680
Speaker 5: shit be like just me talking in my mind. You're

1216
00:58:19,760 --> 00:58:23,720
Speaker 5: not like, I just really tell that I forgive you

1217
00:58:23,720 --> 00:58:26,200
Speaker 5: because I know my son, bro, and I know he.

1218
00:58:28,680 --> 00:58:29,040
Speaker 8: I know.

1219
00:58:31,680 --> 00:58:35,000
Speaker 4: He was in a dog space and that ain't no excuse.

1220
00:58:35,120 --> 00:58:35,320
Speaker 1: Man.

1221
00:58:35,520 --> 00:58:38,360
Speaker 5: You feel that ain't no excuse, man. You know, like

1222
00:58:39,400 --> 00:58:41,240
Speaker 5: and I used to preach that ship to him, bro,

1223
00:58:41,480 --> 00:58:48,120
Speaker 5: like gotta always think about your kids, man. So basically,

1224
00:58:49,520 --> 00:58:50,200
Speaker 5: you feel like.

1225
00:58:52,760 --> 00:58:55,560
Speaker 1: Even even like him knowing that he was going through

1226
00:58:55,640 --> 00:58:59,040
Speaker 1: something like or whatever, he know he was knowing at

1227
00:58:59,080 --> 00:59:02,680
Speaker 1: the end, if he could acknowledge what we're going on,

1228
00:59:02,840 --> 00:59:06,160
Speaker 1: like I'm disappointing part. Yeah, So that's why you said

1229
00:59:06,240 --> 00:59:07,240
Speaker 1: you forgive him.

1230
00:59:07,280 --> 00:59:11,160
Speaker 5: That's what I'm saying because I know that he took

1231
00:59:11,240 --> 00:59:16,400
Speaker 5: the conversations we had to heart. And I talked to

1232
00:59:16,560 --> 00:59:19,280
Speaker 5: coin that day man, the day before he passed. And

1233
00:59:20,120 --> 00:59:23,600
Speaker 5: when I talked to him that morning, he was so vibrant,

1234
00:59:24,600 --> 00:59:27,919
Speaker 5: you know. I asked him how you feel. He said,

1235
00:59:27,920 --> 00:59:28,240
Speaker 5: I'm good.

1236
00:59:28,320 --> 00:59:28,400
Speaker 4: Man.

1237
00:59:28,400 --> 00:59:30,600
Speaker 5: He said, you're on the bike. I said yeah. I

1238
00:59:30,680 --> 00:59:35,040
Speaker 5: said you sound good. You sound rested. And later on

1239
00:59:35,200 --> 00:59:37,440
Speaker 5: that evening when I talked to him, and it's so

1240
00:59:37,600 --> 00:59:41,479
Speaker 5: crazy when I think about our last conversation. I don't

1241
00:59:41,520 --> 00:59:43,960
Speaker 5: know what I was doing, but I was in a rush, Man,

1242
00:59:45,840 --> 00:59:48,680
Speaker 5: and I was like, Corin, I got it. That's easy, man,

1243
00:59:48,720 --> 00:59:50,320
Speaker 5: I take care of it. You know what I'm saying.

1244
00:59:51,480 --> 00:59:54,760
Speaker 7: And he just kept on talking. Man kept on talking.

1245
00:59:55,760 --> 00:59:57,640
Speaker 7: And I said to myself, I said, Man, I got

1246
00:59:57,760 --> 00:59:59,880
Speaker 7: to tell a coin. Damn, Bro, you ain't let me

1247
01:00:00,160 --> 01:00:04,240
Speaker 7: the word. And he just kept on talking. And well,

1248
01:00:04,280 --> 01:00:05,960
Speaker 7: we got off the phone. He said, okay, Pop. We

1249
01:00:06,040 --> 01:00:11,560
Speaker 7: got off the phone. He called me right back. I said,

1250
01:00:11,600 --> 01:00:15,440
Speaker 7: you're good. He said yeah. I just called tell you

1251
01:00:15,440 --> 01:00:17,400
Speaker 7: I love you. Man said, I love you too.

1252
01:00:17,520 --> 01:00:17,720
Speaker 2: Song.

1253
01:00:19,160 --> 01:00:23,800
Speaker 4: And I wouldn't have never thought that that would be.

1254
01:00:26,680 --> 01:00:30,960
Speaker 5: The last conversation that I would have with And it's

1255
01:00:31,080 --> 01:00:40,560
Speaker 5: like my biggest fear right now. It ain't raising my

1256
01:00:40,680 --> 01:00:46,880
Speaker 5: grandkids or doing what's right. My biggest feel right now, Bro,

1257
01:00:47,160 --> 01:00:49,360
Speaker 5: is really grieving myself to death.

1258
01:00:49,480 --> 01:00:56,320
Speaker 4: Man call I hurt so bad that time. Bro, I

1259
01:00:56,360 --> 01:01:00,200
Speaker 4: don't like, I know, I'm gonna yep right out of

1260
01:01:00,320 --> 01:01:05,120
Speaker 4: your head. But the ship ain't getting no easier, bro,

1261
01:01:05,600 --> 01:01:08,600
Speaker 4: fel like I don't see no light at the tunnel man,

1262
01:01:09,400 --> 01:01:09,920
Speaker 4: you know, like.

1263
01:01:12,960 --> 01:01:15,080
Speaker 1: I think. I think. I think the process of it

1264
01:01:15,320 --> 01:01:20,120
Speaker 1: is like you just said what you just said, like

1265
01:01:20,240 --> 01:01:22,400
Speaker 1: you just said to him, like you forgive them. I

1266
01:01:22,480 --> 01:01:26,120
Speaker 1: think the process is gonna be. It ain't gonna get easy,

1267
01:01:26,200 --> 01:01:27,560
Speaker 1: but it's gonna get.

1268
01:01:29,480 --> 01:01:31,400
Speaker 4: Lighter. I think lighter.

1269
01:01:32,080 --> 01:01:39,240
Speaker 1: It's gonna become tolerable. Okay, it's gonna become tolerable. And

1270
01:01:39,320 --> 01:01:41,160
Speaker 1: that's certain ship that you see that make you cry,

1271
01:01:41,360 --> 01:01:43,680
Speaker 1: gonna start make you smile. You know what I'm saying.

1272
01:01:43,920 --> 01:01:46,040
Speaker 1: Stup Like look at that nigga. You know what I'm saying.

1273
01:01:46,400 --> 01:01:48,080
Speaker 1: You're gonna start making you You know what I'm saying,

1274
01:01:48,240 --> 01:01:49,480
Speaker 1: Like I'm just telling.

1275
01:01:49,240 --> 01:01:52,000
Speaker 5: You, like how like how you how you dealt with

1276
01:01:52,240 --> 01:01:55,160
Speaker 5: with with the initial with Dave, how long they've been

1277
01:01:55,200 --> 01:01:56,280
Speaker 5: going a couple of years.

1278
01:01:56,160 --> 01:02:01,680
Speaker 1: And that ship. You know what I'm saying, Like right now,

1279
01:02:02,640 --> 01:02:05,160
Speaker 1: I had to I have to God damn erase Instagram

1280
01:02:05,240 --> 01:02:06,120
Speaker 1: for like six months.

1281
01:02:07,400 --> 01:02:08,160
Speaker 4: I took I took.

1282
01:02:08,240 --> 01:02:10,800
Speaker 5: I took a break off there because like people be

1283
01:02:11,840 --> 01:02:14,720
Speaker 5: meaning well, but the shit just be opened up so

1284
01:02:14,840 --> 01:02:17,080
Speaker 5: many ones like I ain't been on there on them man,

1285
01:02:17,160 --> 01:02:18,400
Speaker 5: and like make much.

1286
01:02:18,640 --> 01:02:20,240
Speaker 4: I had to like disconnect from it.

1287
01:02:20,360 --> 01:02:23,000
Speaker 1: But you gotta you gotta do something like you said earlier.

1288
01:02:23,000 --> 01:02:24,680
Speaker 1: You gotta do something outside of your normal like I

1289
01:02:24,760 --> 01:02:27,680
Speaker 1: picked up golf and just go walking. Just ship that

1290
01:02:27,880 --> 01:02:32,000
Speaker 1: just keep you so bus and so occupied that when

1291
01:02:32,120 --> 01:02:34,280
Speaker 1: by the time you do, even though you're gonna think

1292
01:02:34,280 --> 01:02:35,920
Speaker 1: about it here and there, but by the time you do,

1293
01:02:37,200 --> 01:02:40,040
Speaker 1: it's gonna I don't know, I guess what I'm gonna

1294
01:02:40,040 --> 01:02:42,320
Speaker 1: tell you what I say when I be crying to myself,

1295
01:02:42,640 --> 01:02:45,120
Speaker 1: I made myself start laughing because I be like I

1296
01:02:45,280 --> 01:02:48,480
Speaker 1: hear Dave my boy, like you bitching up big. You

1297
01:02:48,560 --> 01:02:51,000
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying. So I just I say that

1298
01:02:51,120 --> 01:02:55,040
Speaker 1: to myself like it's him saying it, Like yeah, but ship, bro,

1299
01:02:55,080 --> 01:02:56,800
Speaker 1: where the fuck you at? Niggas? But you know what

1300
01:02:56,840 --> 01:03:01,200
Speaker 1: I'm saying, Hew that comes saying it slowly turn into

1301
01:03:01,800 --> 01:03:05,360
Speaker 1: strength like you said, bro, Like I wouldn't give a fuck,

1302
01:03:05,520 --> 01:03:08,400
Speaker 1: like my kid, like my son's a called me on

1303
01:03:08,440 --> 01:03:11,640
Speaker 1: the phone right now. I don't never not anyway and

1304
01:03:11,720 --> 01:03:13,640
Speaker 1: just make the nigga be on old. You know what

1305
01:03:13,680 --> 01:03:19,440
Speaker 1: I'm saying. But with day, any friend, any relationship, anybody,

1306
01:03:19,640 --> 01:03:22,240
Speaker 1: I know, I can stand to see them walk away,

1307
01:03:23,280 --> 01:03:24,640
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. If I just stand to

1308
01:03:24,680 --> 01:03:27,000
Speaker 1: see even with my grandma when she passed away, my

1309
01:03:27,080 --> 01:03:29,680
Speaker 1: daddy when they passed away, it's like you living. You

1310
01:03:30,440 --> 01:03:32,960
Speaker 1: can keep living even though it's gonna be hard. You

1311
01:03:33,040 --> 01:03:34,800
Speaker 1: can keep living. Life always been hard.

1312
01:03:34,960 --> 01:03:36,000
Speaker 4: And you know what's so crazy?

1313
01:03:36,040 --> 01:03:41,120
Speaker 5: Though you asked me someone earlier and I couldn't really process,

1314
01:03:41,240 --> 01:03:46,919
Speaker 5: I understand what you was saying. But now doing this podcast,

1315
01:03:49,000 --> 01:03:52,960
Speaker 5: that was the message for me today. But it's strength

1316
01:03:53,080 --> 01:03:55,640
Speaker 5: in it. Yeah, it is strength in it. You feel

1317
01:03:55,640 --> 01:03:58,240
Speaker 5: what I'm saying, Like even in your darkest moments. So

1318
01:03:58,440 --> 01:04:02,120
Speaker 5: like you said, like see war was real emotional man.

1319
01:04:02,680 --> 01:04:05,960
Speaker 5: You know, like me and dude will have conversations where

1320
01:04:06,040 --> 01:04:08,680
Speaker 5: he would cry to me, you know what I'm saying,

1321
01:04:09,160 --> 01:04:11,040
Speaker 5: and I'd be there to come for them and give

1322
01:04:11,080 --> 01:04:13,200
Speaker 5: him advice and you know, tell them how to navigate

1323
01:04:13,280 --> 01:04:17,520
Speaker 5: through things. So it's like you said, like throughout the pain,

1324
01:04:19,560 --> 01:04:23,880
Speaker 5: I think the biggest plus is no matter what you're

1325
01:04:23,960 --> 01:04:27,160
Speaker 5: facing in life, no matter what ad versus is coming

1326
01:04:27,200 --> 01:04:30,600
Speaker 5: your way. When you look back over the hills and

1327
01:04:30,720 --> 01:04:34,360
Speaker 5: mountains that you don't travel and you see the ones

1328
01:04:34,480 --> 01:04:37,280
Speaker 5: in front of you, you know, the same God that

1329
01:04:37,400 --> 01:04:40,160
Speaker 5: brought you over them gonna bring you two and over these.

1330
01:04:40,720 --> 01:04:42,160
Speaker 5: And like you said, at the end of the day,

1331
01:04:43,320 --> 01:04:46,160
Speaker 5: this does not kill me, can only make me stronger. Fact,

1332
01:04:46,800 --> 01:04:51,280
Speaker 5: like you said, And that's that's a great analogy for

1333
01:04:51,400 --> 01:04:54,520
Speaker 5: me to walk away with today. Even when you feel

1334
01:04:54,600 --> 01:04:57,880
Speaker 5: weak in the midst of it, some strength, you know

1335
01:04:57,960 --> 01:05:00,440
Speaker 5: what I'm saying. Like you said, like and what I

1336
01:05:00,600 --> 01:05:02,440
Speaker 5: try to do, I try to focus on the good

1337
01:05:02,480 --> 01:05:03,800
Speaker 5: times because we had a lot of them.

1338
01:05:03,840 --> 01:05:05,920
Speaker 4: Brother, you feel what I'm saying. We had a lot

1339
01:05:06,000 --> 01:05:08,520
Speaker 4: of them, you know what I mean. So it's like

1340
01:05:08,600 --> 01:05:11,040
Speaker 4: a lot of times you just have to snap out

1341
01:05:11,080 --> 01:05:11,200
Speaker 4: of it.

1342
01:05:11,440 --> 01:05:12,439
Speaker 1: Man, you know what I'm saying.

1343
01:05:13,280 --> 01:05:16,040
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, that's right, that's right. And you know that

1344
01:05:16,280 --> 01:05:19,480
Speaker 5: it ain't impossible. And like you said, even when you

1345
01:05:19,720 --> 01:05:24,400
Speaker 5: dealing with life or relationship or partnership or whatever, like

1346
01:05:24,560 --> 01:05:27,360
Speaker 5: you said, my mind said, hey, man, nigga, if I'm

1347
01:05:27,440 --> 01:05:30,960
Speaker 5: still standing after the losses out on too, man, you

1348
01:05:31,080 --> 01:05:33,720
Speaker 5: can go on bout your business. Ain't no animosity, ain't

1349
01:05:33,760 --> 01:05:37,960
Speaker 5: no hard feelings. So and see that's another plus plus.

1350
01:05:38,040 --> 01:05:38,760
Speaker 4: I got out of there.

1351
01:05:38,880 --> 01:05:39,000
Speaker 8: Man.

1352
01:05:39,120 --> 01:05:41,240
Speaker 5: You feel what I'm saying. For a lot of time, man,

1353
01:05:41,320 --> 01:05:43,560
Speaker 5: neigga be like, damn, I'm a partner. Man, I'm a bitch.

1354
01:05:43,640 --> 01:05:44,160
Speaker 5: You know what I'm saying.

1355
01:05:44,240 --> 01:05:44,640
Speaker 4: Such that.

1356
01:05:45,240 --> 01:05:47,600
Speaker 5: But then when you start focusing on you and what

1357
01:05:47,920 --> 01:05:50,520
Speaker 5: you can do and that's all you can control, you

1358
01:05:50,720 --> 01:05:53,680
Speaker 5: just realized, Hey, man, listen, if it's a dane for

1359
01:05:53,760 --> 01:05:57,040
Speaker 5: you to leave, go ahead, because I like this one.

1360
01:05:57,160 --> 01:06:01,200
Speaker 5: Here shit and nigga, And here I am months later,

1361
01:06:01,880 --> 01:06:04,960
Speaker 5: still in my right frame of mind, still ain't lost it.

1362
01:06:05,440 --> 01:06:07,040
Speaker 1: If I was gonna crack out of cracked in, I

1363
01:06:07,040 --> 01:06:09,400
Speaker 1: would have been that's real cracked. Then if I was

1364
01:06:09,440 --> 01:06:12,520
Speaker 1: gonna crack, if it was any crack, any any any

1365
01:06:12,600 --> 01:06:15,400
Speaker 1: cracks in my foundation out of crumbled, then then that's real.

1366
01:06:15,960 --> 01:06:18,080
Speaker 1: So if I ain't crumbled, then hey, I'm built the lab.

1367
01:06:18,200 --> 01:06:20,280
Speaker 1: Bro That what a nigga. Gota just says like I

1368
01:06:20,320 --> 01:06:22,560
Speaker 1: can handle it. I handled that. I can handle it

1369
01:06:22,760 --> 01:06:24,760
Speaker 1: like no amount of mine. I can't lose no amount

1370
01:06:24,800 --> 01:06:27,760
Speaker 1: of money and be cracked under pressure. I can't. Ain't

1371
01:06:28,040 --> 01:06:30,760
Speaker 1: no relationship of friendship Now it's people that's in my

1372
01:06:30,840 --> 01:06:33,440
Speaker 1: life that I know if something was to happen to them,

1373
01:06:33,480 --> 01:06:35,520
Speaker 1: it's gonna fuck me up the same way. But what

1374
01:06:35,560 --> 01:06:38,240
Speaker 1: I'm saying, like far as ship that we take value

1375
01:06:38,360 --> 01:06:41,280
Speaker 1: in that's not really don't really hold no value as

1376
01:06:41,320 --> 01:06:44,840
Speaker 1: in relationships and friendships and and and and people other

1377
01:06:44,880 --> 01:06:47,560
Speaker 1: people emotions and feelings, that ship don't hold no value

1378
01:06:47,560 --> 01:06:50,280
Speaker 1: to me no more. Fuck, that's how you feel. I'm

1379
01:06:50,320 --> 01:06:53,800
Speaker 1: not an absorbi. Your energy it ain't mine, that's yours.

1380
01:06:54,320 --> 01:06:56,960
Speaker 5: Guess what certain certain certain losses of damn that have

1381
01:06:57,040 --> 01:06:58,160
Speaker 5: a nigga heartless man.

1382
01:06:58,640 --> 01:07:01,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, you you'll keep a little bit.

1383
01:07:02,440 --> 01:07:04,680
Speaker 5: But the joy of that ship, man, And like man,

1384
01:07:04,720 --> 01:07:08,120
Speaker 5: it's whatever, man, And that that that's my mindset now

1385
01:07:08,640 --> 01:07:11,280
Speaker 5: Like like like hey, bro, listen, and I'm gonna tell

1386
01:07:11,280 --> 01:07:15,200
Speaker 5: you something in coins there a major lesson I learned.

1387
01:07:15,280 --> 01:07:15,440
Speaker 7: Man.

1388
01:07:16,480 --> 01:07:18,440
Speaker 4: Ship that used to matter, it do ain't matter no more.

1389
01:07:18,560 --> 01:07:18,720
Speaker 2: Man.

1390
01:07:19,400 --> 01:07:21,919
Speaker 5: That that that's just how it some. You know, ship

1391
01:07:22,000 --> 01:07:25,160
Speaker 5: that I used to put all this emotion and time.

1392
01:07:25,880 --> 01:07:28,640
Speaker 1: Bro, Listen, Man, the same advice you gave him about

1393
01:07:29,480 --> 01:07:32,280
Speaker 1: your healing, ain't in them bottles. Ain't in them pill bottles.

1394
01:07:32,360 --> 01:07:36,040
Speaker 1: It ain't in yours ain't in just sitting in the sorrow.

1395
01:07:37,560 --> 01:07:39,720
Speaker 4: That money money comment, I broke you got out of

1396
01:07:39,800 --> 01:07:40,280
Speaker 4: house man.

1397
01:07:40,240 --> 01:07:42,640
Speaker 1: That nigga tell you man, shout out of many used

1398
01:07:42,640 --> 01:07:44,720
Speaker 1: to call me every week. He probably you know, I

1399
01:07:44,760 --> 01:07:48,600
Speaker 1: started the phone for everybody. Shut montay what the only

1400
01:07:48,760 --> 01:07:50,200
Speaker 1: motherfuckers can get.

1401
01:07:50,120 --> 01:07:51,320
Speaker 4: Through believe that?

1402
01:07:51,520 --> 01:07:53,760
Speaker 1: He like, Bro, I know you ain't picking up for nobody, man,

1403
01:07:53,920 --> 01:07:58,080
Speaker 1: But matey what the first person I called back, and

1404
01:07:58,160 --> 01:08:00,560
Speaker 1: that nigga said some ship that shake your soul, bro,

1405
01:08:00,960 --> 01:08:03,880
Speaker 1: that nigga that ordained Believe you know what I'm saying,

1406
01:08:03,880 --> 01:08:07,600
Speaker 1: shout out the money she calling today? Checking on your mother. Brother,

1407
01:08:07,600 --> 01:08:11,040
Speaker 1: You're good, yeah, here alright nothing.

1408
01:08:11,480 --> 01:08:14,000
Speaker 5: And that that like like like like like I had

1409
01:08:14,040 --> 01:08:17,320
Speaker 5: a moment, Bro, I just go dog. But when I

1410
01:08:17,439 --> 01:08:19,880
Speaker 5: picked that phone or the first thing he's gonna say, brouh, no,

1411
01:08:20,000 --> 01:08:21,880
Speaker 5: it's on you. But I'm just calling and check on this.

1412
01:08:22,000 --> 01:08:24,400
Speaker 5: You know I'm here home. You feel me get out

1413
01:08:24,479 --> 01:08:26,599
Speaker 5: the house. Man, come come to a soft ball game,

1414
01:08:27,320 --> 01:08:30,679
Speaker 5: you know, like like like he just went on somewhere

1415
01:08:30,720 --> 01:08:32,519
Speaker 5: out of the road the other day to the slops

1416
01:08:32,520 --> 01:08:34,160
Speaker 5: here like bra shit, just gold man, you know what

1417
01:08:34,200 --> 01:08:37,519
Speaker 5: I'm saying, Like he always he's selfless when it comes

1418
01:08:37,520 --> 01:08:38,000
Speaker 5: to others.

1419
01:08:38,080 --> 01:08:38,240
Speaker 1: Man.

1420
01:08:38,800 --> 01:08:41,120
Speaker 4: And at the same time he heard two car man

1421
01:08:41,240 --> 01:08:43,200
Speaker 4: Corn with his little brother. You know what I'm saying.

1422
01:08:43,200 --> 01:08:44,920
Speaker 1: I had him on pugg he telling about the women.

1423
01:08:44,960 --> 01:08:51,560
Speaker 1: Know he went on and of course I'm about to

1424
01:08:51,560 --> 01:08:56,160
Speaker 1: say today talking about he got there Pete. Then the

1425
01:08:56,240 --> 01:08:58,960
Speaker 1: one that saw your girl get beat out. Yeah, he

1426
01:08:59,040 --> 01:09:03,240
Speaker 1: shot at the do that. I said, well, wasn't up

1427
01:09:03,280 --> 01:09:05,040
Speaker 1: with God? He said, I I would have been in Jayson,

1428
01:09:05,160 --> 01:09:09,320
Speaker 1: shot in the car, shot crazy.

1429
01:09:10,840 --> 01:09:11,760
Speaker 4: That's my man, bro.

1430
01:09:12,520 --> 01:09:14,599
Speaker 5: He hold me out and like he was the one

1431
01:09:14,680 --> 01:09:18,840
Speaker 5: man like before coin past man, he would add it

1432
01:09:18,960 --> 01:09:19,160
Speaker 5: on me.

1433
01:09:19,280 --> 01:09:20,400
Speaker 4: Man, go see a therapist.

1434
01:09:20,479 --> 01:09:20,559
Speaker 3: Bro.

1435
01:09:21,439 --> 01:09:23,519
Speaker 5: I ain't saying it gonna help you, but hey, man,

1436
01:09:23,600 --> 01:09:25,000
Speaker 5: go get some of that ship up off, you know

1437
01:09:25,040 --> 01:09:27,720
Speaker 5: what I'm saying. And I started off seeing a therapist

1438
01:09:27,840 --> 01:09:32,200
Speaker 5: after Corn passed for grief. Man, that ship transitions into

1439
01:09:32,280 --> 01:09:35,360
Speaker 5: my childhood at a lot of ship. I've been caring

1440
01:09:35,439 --> 01:09:37,760
Speaker 5: for years, man, you know. And then you know, like

1441
01:09:37,800 --> 01:09:39,920
Speaker 5: when you look at it, Bro, like you heard a

1442
01:09:40,000 --> 01:09:42,000
Speaker 5: lot of people. Brother, it didn't have nothing to do

1443
01:09:42,120 --> 01:09:42,879
Speaker 5: with your struggle.

1444
01:09:42,960 --> 01:09:43,080
Speaker 2: Man.

1445
01:09:43,640 --> 01:09:47,120
Speaker 4: You feel me so so through you know the therapy, Man,

1446
01:09:47,200 --> 01:09:48,920
Speaker 4: I just learned how just let a lot of shit go.

1447
01:09:49,120 --> 01:09:49,280
Speaker 1: Man.

1448
01:09:49,360 --> 01:09:51,240
Speaker 4: You feel me like a lot of pain, a lot

1449
01:09:51,320 --> 01:09:53,000
Speaker 4: of anger, a lot of billing.

1450
01:09:53,080 --> 01:09:55,880
Speaker 5: Like Nigga said, Man the attitude, but man ship because

1451
01:09:55,880 --> 01:09:57,400
Speaker 5: I'm caring forty years ago.

1452
01:09:57,520 --> 01:09:59,760
Speaker 1: Man, they're trying to be strong, trying to be like

1453
01:10:00,000 --> 01:10:03,360
Speaker 1: I'm okay, but that ship just stacking on top of stacks, stacking, stacking,

1454
01:10:03,439 --> 01:10:06,040
Speaker 1: stack and stacking. That's how Nigga be having them breakdown

1455
01:10:06,600 --> 01:10:08,080
Speaker 1: now and just spass out.

1456
01:10:08,320 --> 01:10:11,000
Speaker 5: Feel what I'm saying. See, that's one. That's another good

1457
01:10:11,080 --> 01:10:15,360
Speaker 5: thing that came out of Corns transition. I was able

1458
01:10:15,400 --> 01:10:19,679
Speaker 5: to face some of my past realities man, and be like, hey, man,

1459
01:10:19,760 --> 01:10:21,920
Speaker 5: you know, like and I had to pick up the

1460
01:10:21,960 --> 01:10:23,040
Speaker 5: phone and call some people.

1461
01:10:23,120 --> 01:10:25,680
Speaker 1: Man, you know, and niggas don't understand a lot of

1462
01:10:25,760 --> 01:10:28,240
Speaker 1: them tears be needing to come out. That shit is clean,

1463
01:10:28,880 --> 01:10:31,160
Speaker 1: like you holding on them tears back being strong. Brother,

1464
01:10:32,320 --> 01:10:34,680
Speaker 1: when you started releasing that ship. It's like, Bro, I'm

1465
01:10:34,760 --> 01:10:38,879
Speaker 1: telling you, man, I don't turn to the spirit spiritual

1466
01:10:39,560 --> 01:10:41,400
Speaker 1: like for some reason, Bro, I told her, I said

1467
01:10:41,439 --> 01:10:44,360
Speaker 1: that before plenty of time bro, for what we before

1468
01:10:44,479 --> 01:10:44,960
Speaker 1: day passed.

1469
01:10:44,960 --> 01:10:45,080
Speaker 7: Bro.

1470
01:10:45,200 --> 01:10:48,120
Speaker 1: It's like every day I wake up for some reason,

1471
01:10:48,160 --> 01:10:51,280
Speaker 1: I was just crying, like just releasing, just crying. But

1472
01:10:51,320 --> 01:10:52,840
Speaker 1: then when I went like I said, I wasn't talking

1473
01:10:52,840 --> 01:10:54,880
Speaker 1: them spiritual and I talked to a theory. They were

1474
01:10:54,920 --> 01:10:57,920
Speaker 1: just like man, just them tears been in there. Believe

1475
01:10:57,960 --> 01:11:00,439
Speaker 1: that they just finding their way out this part of transition.

1476
01:11:00,640 --> 01:11:03,320
Speaker 1: Like I started walking the trails, stopped eating that bullshit.

1477
01:11:04,040 --> 01:11:06,479
Speaker 1: All that shit just started coming out like slowly. After

1478
01:11:06,520 --> 01:11:07,920
Speaker 1: that shit, I felt the best I ever felt in

1479
01:11:08,000 --> 01:11:08,320
Speaker 1: my life.

1480
01:11:08,360 --> 01:11:09,040
Speaker 4: I don't know what I'm saying.

1481
01:11:09,160 --> 01:11:11,560
Speaker 5: Like you said, man, once you started cleaning yourself, like

1482
01:11:11,800 --> 01:11:15,200
Speaker 5: mentally and physically, you just start, you know, you start

1483
01:11:15,320 --> 01:11:17,680
Speaker 5: You're cleaning your brain too, man, you know you just

1484
01:11:17,720 --> 01:11:21,160
Speaker 5: started singing shit different like coin gone. I hurt, But

1485
01:11:21,240 --> 01:11:23,839
Speaker 5: at the end of the day, man, like I'm grateful

1486
01:11:24,720 --> 01:11:26,880
Speaker 5: for the relationship I had. I talked to Ricky Smile

1487
01:11:26,960 --> 01:11:30,400
Speaker 5: and did his part, did his show, and he was

1488
01:11:30,520 --> 01:11:33,679
Speaker 5: telling me about you know, his son died a couple

1489
01:11:33,720 --> 01:11:35,640
Speaker 5: of yearsfold Corn and he got it. I bought it.

1490
01:11:35,880 --> 01:11:38,240
Speaker 5: I got his book. He gave me a copy, and

1491
01:11:38,880 --> 01:11:42,519
Speaker 5: he got a chap in there that says God would

1492
01:11:42,560 --> 01:11:45,680
Speaker 5: give you double for your trouble. I'm gonna tell you

1493
01:11:45,680 --> 01:11:48,320
Speaker 5: all this quick story. So he had this girl that

1494
01:11:48,439 --> 01:11:52,519
Speaker 5: he had knew she had two twins and she had

1495
01:11:52,560 --> 01:11:56,280
Speaker 5: an older daughter. The oldest daughter dad had died, and

1496
01:11:56,439 --> 01:11:59,080
Speaker 5: she would bring her over to the house so Rick

1497
01:11:59,080 --> 01:12:01,280
Speaker 5: could talk to him, counselor stuff, cause she was like,

1498
01:12:01,840 --> 01:12:04,840
Speaker 5: you know, dealing with it. So the little girls will

1499
01:12:04,880 --> 01:12:05,360
Speaker 5: be able to us.

1500
01:12:05,400 --> 01:12:05,800
Speaker 4: So much.

1501
01:12:06,560 --> 01:12:08,960
Speaker 5: Rick started buying the little toys and stuff for them

1502
01:12:09,000 --> 01:12:11,320
Speaker 5: to play with while you know, he was counseling the

1503
01:12:11,400 --> 01:12:14,760
Speaker 5: daughter or whatever. And he had done had some situations

1504
01:12:14,880 --> 01:12:19,400
Speaker 5: with that girl they mama, and he said one day

1505
01:12:20,560 --> 01:12:24,559
Speaker 5: they came over right before he started counseling. He went

1506
01:12:24,640 --> 01:12:27,160
Speaker 5: outside just to holler and screen because he was hurting

1507
01:12:27,240 --> 01:12:30,439
Speaker 5: so bad. And he says when he went outside, he

1508
01:12:30,520 --> 01:12:33,599
Speaker 5: saw them little girls and he couldn't even open his mouth. Man,

1509
01:12:34,840 --> 01:12:36,839
Speaker 5: So he say he went on with the counseling session,

1510
01:12:37,920 --> 01:12:40,320
Speaker 5: and the baby mama had been going through some stuff

1511
01:12:40,600 --> 01:12:46,280
Speaker 5: with the alleged baby daddy, so they went to court.

1512
01:12:46,439 --> 01:12:51,120
Speaker 5: The babies coming back not his. Come to find out,

1513
01:12:51,240 --> 01:12:54,920
Speaker 5: the babies belonged to Rick damn. And he had two

1514
01:12:55,000 --> 01:12:58,840
Speaker 5: twins and didn't even know it. That's like God gave

1515
01:12:58,960 --> 01:13:01,160
Speaker 5: him double for his trouble. You feel what I'm saying,

1516
01:13:01,560 --> 01:13:02,840
Speaker 5: And he said he had no.

1517
01:13:03,040 --> 01:13:05,880
Speaker 4: Idea, bro that these kids was his man the lady

1518
01:13:05,920 --> 01:13:08,320
Speaker 4: then evidently she didn't.

1519
01:13:08,360 --> 01:13:09,840
Speaker 5: She was with his too.

1520
01:13:12,640 --> 01:13:18,240
Speaker 4: Probably right now if you look at him page he

1521
01:13:18,400 --> 01:13:22,559
Speaker 4: rating two twins. Man, that's crazy. After after his after

1522
01:13:22,640 --> 01:13:23,559
Speaker 4: the loss of his son.

1523
01:13:23,680 --> 01:13:28,000
Speaker 5: Man, and he kept telling me, like we talked text

1524
01:13:28,080 --> 01:13:32,479
Speaker 5: all the time and he always say, man, it's a

1525
01:13:32,600 --> 01:13:36,960
Speaker 5: blessing in it. Just hold on, you know, like like

1526
01:13:37,200 --> 01:13:39,479
Speaker 5: you never know like what what what it is or

1527
01:13:39,520 --> 01:13:42,240
Speaker 5: win it's gonna come. But he was like, man, if

1528
01:13:42,320 --> 01:13:44,120
Speaker 5: God bring you to it, he gonna bring.

1529
01:13:44,040 --> 01:13:48,080
Speaker 4: You through, Big Fact. And I stand on that man.

1530
01:13:49,760 --> 01:13:50,160
Speaker 5: Mm hmm.

1531
01:13:50,760 --> 01:13:50,920
Speaker 4: Man.

1532
01:13:50,960 --> 01:13:53,280
Speaker 3: We truly appreciate you pulling up man to give us

1533
01:13:53,360 --> 01:13:55,720
Speaker 3: game gym. You know what I'm saying. To pray for

1534
01:13:55,800 --> 01:13:58,080
Speaker 3: your strength and you know we're here. You know what

1535
01:13:58,120 --> 01:13:59,800
Speaker 3: I'm saying. You got all that man for your phone,

1536
01:13:59,840 --> 01:14:01,720
Speaker 3: so if you need is hit us. We're going to

1537
01:14:01,760 --> 01:14:04,360
Speaker 3: continue to refrac one and this legacy for sure. Thank

1538
01:14:04,439 --> 01:14:05,040
Speaker 3: you all for having me.

1539
01:14:06,120 --> 01:14:07,320
Speaker 1: I don't live at Homie.

1540
01:14:07,280 --> 01:14:10,440
Speaker 3: Don't live Homie Bigfaxpod dot Com Salute.

1541
01:14:10,840 --> 01:14:13,920
Speaker 1: Catch the Big Facts Audio Experience on Iheart's black Effect

1542
01:14:14,000 --> 01:14:18,439
Speaker 1: on Tuesdays, revote on Wednesdays, and revote YouTube channel on Thursdays.

1543
01:14:18,560 --> 01:14:21,439
Speaker 4: Visit our website now bigfaxpod dot com