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Speaker 1: Welcome back to good Mom's Bad Choices.

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Speaker 2: I'm Erica and I'm Mela, and I'm sleepy, which is

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Speaker 2: just yawning over he sorry, call me Midy.

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Speaker 1: She's over here, chugging.

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Speaker 2: Birth control pills, yawning, yelling at her mother's lot happening

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Speaker 2: right now.

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Speaker 1: She's totally fine.

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Speaker 3: Guys, everything's perfect.

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Speaker 1: You're good, okay?

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Speaker 3: Cool?

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Speaker 1: Well?

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Speaker 3: Hi, Hi, how are you? I'm good? Happy hump day.

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Speaker 1: Do you like my hair?

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Speaker 3: It's so cute. I've actually made me feeling.

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Speaker 4: I was trying to figure out like maybe if it

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Speaker 4: was like to like like to this, like I put

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Speaker 4: a braid in it.

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Speaker 3: I think it kind of like.

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Speaker 2: So I'm in the midst of doing ban two knots,

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Speaker 2: which I don't know. Like I was in the shower

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Speaker 2: and I was like, I'm so fucking.

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Speaker 1: Over my hair. Why did I grow it out? It's

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Speaker 1: too much?

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Speaker 2: And I was like, I'm gonna do it to what

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Speaker 2: Chamila does and get band two nuts. And then the

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Speaker 2: moment I started it, I was like, this is a

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Speaker 2: horrible idea.

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Speaker 3: It's really easy. I can finish that.

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Speaker 1: I can't see. It took me literally ten minutes to

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Speaker 1: do one part.

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Speaker 3: Well, the parts you can't worry about. You gotta just

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Speaker 3: say fuck the parts. I just do.

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Speaker 1: Well, it's my nigga's birthday on Friday.

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Speaker 2: I was trying to Yeah, I was trying to be cute,

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Speaker 2: like I was trying to have to see a look

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Speaker 2: not just like protective sleep style.

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Speaker 4: Well, no one cares about the parts, but also I

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Speaker 4: care about the part. You know, your man likes to

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Speaker 4: do weird shit like, I mean, he might.

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Speaker 1: He might. He might do my hair after tonight. I'm

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Speaker 1: sure you will.

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Speaker 3: He like pucked your eyebrows.

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Speaker 1: I know it's great.

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Speaker 2: I have a living facialist, hairstyleist, nail doer.

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Speaker 3: Such a cancer I know. Okay, Anyway, we're here, we're

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Speaker 3: joined by while they nap podcast Ladies of Wild.

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Speaker 1: They nap.

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Speaker 4: Thanks, guys, I'm shin and I'm late, and you.

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Speaker 1: Guys are in Canada, right we are Drake.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, but you said Drake's hometown. Oh my god, I

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Speaker 3: love Drake. But now he lives here at our home

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Speaker 3: down the valley.

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Speaker 2: About it, Listen, I feel like you know what that's

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Speaker 2: it's okay, Like we're okay with it, but just remember

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Speaker 2: where he was.

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Speaker 1: Does he actually live here? Yeah, everywhere.

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Speaker 4: I've been to his house, his house twice, so have you?

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Speaker 3: Yeah?

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Speaker 1: Is he there? Yeah? Wait? When was this?

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Speaker 3: Every summer he has a party and I go, what

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Speaker 3: are you talking about? Where have you been?

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Speaker 1: I've been? I don't know, I've been here with you?

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Speaker 1: And why it wasn't I invited to the summer party.

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Speaker 3: Always call me a club groupie, and so you don't

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Speaker 3: get invited. Wait, let me tell you this week.

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Speaker 1: No, that was you were trying to go. She was

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Speaker 1: trying to go to a fucking.

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Speaker 3: And we missed it and it was amazing.

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Speaker 1: Was the best?

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Speaker 3: She went, Yeah, so let me tell you this is

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Speaker 3: the most la shit ever.

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Speaker 4: So I'm here, I'm so tired, like I kind of

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Speaker 4: got a bed that my my homegirl calls.

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Speaker 3: I'm like hello, I'm like yeah, She's like, Drake's DJ

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Speaker 3: just called me.

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Speaker 4: I'm so what, So did you want us to come over?

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Speaker 4: She's like no, I did they want to go out?

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Speaker 4: I'm like, I don't want to go out. I don't

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Speaker 4: want to be like a group where. She's like, I'm like, listen,

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Speaker 4: if we go into his house, it's like this intimate

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Speaker 4: setting that probably have crab legs. This is the most

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Speaker 4: La conversation. And then she calls me the next day

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Speaker 4: because we ended up not going. She's like, we missed everything.

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Speaker 4: Drake DJ told me Kylie was there. It was a small,

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Speaker 4: intimate terrible.

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Speaker 3: I know I was.

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Speaker 4: Anyway, they went to the house, and they went to

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Speaker 4: the Delight, they went to the Lilas and the meeting

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Speaker 4: that Danielle didn't go because I was too tired and

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Speaker 4: she was tired, and I should have just went because

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Speaker 4: for what I don't know.

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Speaker 3: But I could have plugged good Moms. I could have

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Speaker 3: told Drake about good mom.

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Speaker 1: I was over here shaming her. I'm like, you guys

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Speaker 1: are ratchet club huse.

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Speaker 3: Every time I want to go to her, she shames me.

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Speaker 2: But I just feel like the clubbing days are just

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Speaker 2: whack in La. There's no fucking point.

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Speaker 3: It is the whack. But like, Drake's house is really nice.

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Speaker 4: You weren't going to Drin's house, I know, but I'm saying,

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Speaker 4: if he was invited, it was another full party, I

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Speaker 4: would go, even though I'm going to there's so many hoes.

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Speaker 3: You're like, she's self inviting herself, Drake, if you're listening,

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Speaker 3: you better be.

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Speaker 1: I'm only going to his home. I refuse to meet

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Speaker 1: him in public space.

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Speaker 4: Wait, okay, let me also get now that we're all

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Speaker 4: the topics, let me just go ahead and tell you

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Speaker 4: the last time went to Drake's house. Right, there's all

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Speaker 4: these bitches, you know, probably like ten to one to

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Speaker 4: the niggas, and they're all like wearing a shitload of makeup.

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Speaker 4: It's four hundred degrees in calabasses, it's melting off the

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Speaker 4: allbring weaves and all looking like trying to be cut

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Speaker 4: by the pool. He has all these things, food, liquor,

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Speaker 4: and then he has this huge obstacle course, like this

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Speaker 4: blow up obstacle course, and it's been dry all day.

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Speaker 4: Not one single bitch has gotten on it because you know,

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Speaker 4: everyone's trying to be sexy and are like you're ready,

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Speaker 4: we gotta get on this.

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Speaker 1: We're like.

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Speaker 4: My baby, my baby daddy is with us. We made

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Speaker 4: him sit at the end to time who made it out?

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Speaker 4: But only two bitches at Drake's house Like, oh you Marks,

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Speaker 4: I'm like climbing climbing up the sta.

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Speaker 2: One me of course athletic for you, Yes, why are

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Speaker 2: you shocked that I'm shocked that you're athletic? I've never

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Speaker 2: seen you do one athletic thing in my house.

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Speaker 3: Fight you right now, I wrestle you to the ground.

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Speaker 3: That's amazing. Okay, sorry, sorry, sorry about my drake rant.

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Speaker 3: I'm clearly in love obviously, I'm want to take that. Like,

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Speaker 3: so you've been to Toronto, then you must know what.

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Speaker 3: Oh I haven't. No, I've only been to Vancouver. I

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Speaker 3: want to come to Toronto though, Yeah, you need to.

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Speaker 2: Vancouver's amazing though, absolutely so. We call Vancouver like the

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Speaker 2: la of Canada.

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Speaker 3: Oh really.

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Speaker 5: Every person from California that we talked to were like,

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Speaker 5: have you been to Canada?

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Speaker 3: It's always Vancouver.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I've been to Canada.

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Speaker 2: I've been to Montreal, Vancouver and Toronto, and Montreal is beautiful, gorgeous,

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Speaker 2: it's just so cold.

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Speaker 1: No, they a lot. They speak French there, right, that's

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Speaker 1: like the language of language.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like cool, friends, it's like a little bit different,

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Speaker 2: but I mean same fiv Yeah. Okay, ladies, So tell

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Speaker 2: me about your guys. Tell me how you guys started

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Speaker 2: your podcast. What's why did you guys start while they mapped?

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Speaker 2: Obviously kids, Yeah, that.

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Speaker 3: Was like the big one there.

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Speaker 5: But I we were on maternity leave and I always

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Speaker 5: wanted to start a podcast, but I didn't know what

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Speaker 5: I wanted to talk about, and I just didn't want

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Speaker 5: to do like, you know, random shit. So I was like,

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Speaker 5: I'm gonna wait until something comes to me. And then

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Speaker 5: I had a baby and I was like, Okay, I

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Speaker 5: like this, this is cool. I have a lot of

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Speaker 5: shit to talk about about being a mom, like I

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Speaker 5: didn't like I feel like being a first time mom.

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Speaker 3: I was just like, what the what the fuck is

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Speaker 3: going on?

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Speaker 5: Like so much shit was happening, and I'm like, nobody

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Speaker 5: told me about this shit, Like no one was like

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Speaker 5: why is my whole body falling apart? Like I don't understand,

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Speaker 5: and a lot was happening. I felt really lonely. I

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Speaker 5: didn't have much friends to talk to because they didn't

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Speaker 5: have any kids at the time, or all their kids

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Speaker 5: are much older so they couldn't remember. So a mutual

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Speaker 5: friend of ours kind of hooked this up and we

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Speaker 5: started going on like mom dates.

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Speaker 3: I'm laughing at that.

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Speaker 2: Now we can stop your fuffles and that's funny way.

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Speaker 1: You know, just so you guys know.

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Speaker 2: When before we started this interview, Jamila was fully convinced

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Speaker 2: that they were married, and then they were lesbian married.

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Speaker 4: Well, Erica said, you guys are married, right, and they

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Speaker 4: both said yeah, So I figured to each other. I

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Speaker 4: mean I was it sounded like this is twenty twenty.

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Speaker 4: You can't just say are you married? Then asked too,

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Speaker 4: you know that doesn't apply to other people. The two

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Speaker 4: people sitting in front of us super.

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Speaker 2: Cute and hilarious. We were hooked up, but yeah, that's

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Speaker 2: kind of what happened. We were hooked up, and then

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Speaker 2: Sen approached me and was like, hey, like you know,

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Speaker 2: this is after we had already gone out and like

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Speaker 2: spend time with each other.

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Speaker 3: She was like yeah, like I kind of have this

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Speaker 3: idea to start a podcast. What do you think? And

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Speaker 3: I'm like, yeah, no, I'm okay.

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Speaker 2: She was like Nana, I'm good, Like that's okay, that's

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Speaker 2: not for me, Like my voice is gross, Like I

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Speaker 2: hate the sound of my voice, Like I don't want

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Speaker 2: to do that, and like I hate being like bandwagony,

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Speaker 2: like I know, like, of course, like you know, these

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Speaker 2: at least for everybody, and everyone has their own passions.

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Speaker 2: But I felt like the podcasting things like really growing,

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Speaker 2: everyone's a podcast? What podcast? But I was like yeah, no,

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Speaker 2: I don't want to be a part of that camp.

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Speaker 3: And then she's it. She was like Adam, and she's like,

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Speaker 3: just try, just try it.

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Speaker 2: And then the same friend I hooked this up was like, honestly,

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Speaker 2: give it one shot, try one time.

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Speaker 3: If you hate it, you hate it. If you like it,

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Speaker 3: then fine.

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Speaker 2: And then like it came at like a pivotal moment

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Speaker 2: where my husband had left to work out of town

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Speaker 2: and I was home alone with my daughter, who is

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Speaker 2: a blessing, but like Jesus, being home with her by

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Speaker 2: myself when she's ten months old, doing all the cooking,

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Speaker 2: all the cleaning, everything was fucking exhausting, and I'm like, yo,

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Speaker 2: I can't do this, Like I just I need to,

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Speaker 2: like I need an outlet. So one day called my

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Speaker 2: cousin's mom was like please watch my baby.

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Speaker 3: Went to her house. I'm like, yeah, let's record, and

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Speaker 3: like I got some shit.

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Speaker 2: I was in, Like I was like faceing that mic

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Speaker 2: and I just went in and by the end of it,

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Speaker 2: I'm like, wow, that was so cathartic.

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Speaker 3: I need to do this again, like where it started.

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Speaker 2: So it was dope because it's started being it was

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Speaker 2: about us truly, like about us, you know, just sharing

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Speaker 2: our thoughts and then like in the process of that,

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Speaker 2: we built the community, which is pretty cool.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that's so dope. So you guys are in Canada,

225
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Speaker 1: like what is would you say? Like, well, because I

226
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Speaker 1: know America we're fucked.

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Speaker 3: I'm sure, I'm sure you've been watching the news.

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Speaker 4: I'm sure you're aware that America's a joke.

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Speaker 2: Well, I mean, but I know that Canada has been

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Speaker 2: in quarantine too, and obviously you guys are still in quarantine.

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Speaker 2: You guys have probably been going through the same shit

232
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Speaker 2: as us, as moms who are locked locked.

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Speaker 3: Up, don't let me out.

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Speaker 1: Locked up with our kids and stuff, and like, well, what's.

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Speaker 2: The climate over there in Canada as far as like

236
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Speaker 2: what's happening? Or is everyone really like paranoid? Are they

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Speaker 2: all indoors?

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Speaker 1: Have you guys broke quarantine?

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00:09:58,120 --> 00:10:01,040
Speaker 2: Well yeah, well yeah, kids going to summer camp? Are

240
00:10:01,080 --> 00:10:02,000
Speaker 2: they going to go to school?

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Speaker 3: Like camp is canceled? Yeah?

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00:10:06,080 --> 00:10:10,080
Speaker 2: I just my daughter's in camp and I was, you know,

243
00:10:10,240 --> 00:10:12,160
Speaker 2: you know how like chatty broads asked if we've ever

244
00:10:12,200 --> 00:10:14,320
Speaker 2: been like people talk shit?

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00:10:15,080 --> 00:10:18,800
Speaker 1: What chatty brods ask people if people talk shit? Someone

246
00:10:18,800 --> 00:10:21,960
Speaker 1: talks shit? What on chatty Broad's about us about me

247
00:10:23,440 --> 00:10:24,680
Speaker 1: in the comments.

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Speaker 2: What they said, They said that we they only could

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Speaker 2: get through half the episode because basically we're bad moms

250
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Speaker 2: because we're black.

251
00:10:32,280 --> 00:10:32,840
Speaker 1: We're bad.

252
00:10:33,120 --> 00:10:34,920
Speaker 3: I've been making everything about brains.

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00:10:34,600 --> 00:10:38,559
Speaker 2: Black, that that I'm just irresponsible because I have my

254
00:10:38,679 --> 00:10:40,960
Speaker 2: daughter going to camp, and that my man met my

255
00:10:41,120 --> 00:10:45,000
Speaker 2: family and that's just irresponsible and breaking quarantine by letting

256
00:10:45,040 --> 00:10:46,480
Speaker 2: my new boyfriend meet my mom.

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Speaker 3: Bitch, did you hear anything said about the na that

258
00:10:49,120 --> 00:10:49,520
Speaker 3: we need.

259
00:10:49,480 --> 00:10:52,800
Speaker 2: To be more immersed with our kids and less worried

260
00:10:52,800 --> 00:10:55,480
Speaker 2: about going out, and that we're boneheads.

261
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Speaker 3: First of all, I want to make it reach. I'm

262
00:11:00,520 --> 00:11:01,560
Speaker 3: not gonna make it Rachel.

263
00:11:01,840 --> 00:11:08,680
Speaker 4: However, Ye Karen, nobody of any other race ever try

264
00:11:08,720 --> 00:11:12,760
Speaker 4: to insult anyone by calling them a bonehead. That that

265
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Speaker 4: one Karen is just not going to do it.

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Speaker 3: You're gonna have become a little harder. Babe.

267
00:11:17,040 --> 00:11:18,960
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I think I called.

268
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Speaker 3: Her, You responded.

269
00:11:21,280 --> 00:11:22,600
Speaker 1: I responded, I was like.

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Speaker 2: First of all, her school's taking the necessary precaution, so

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Speaker 2: you can take that up with all the other parents.

272
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Speaker 3: Right, I'll send you their emails.

273
00:11:29,360 --> 00:11:30,960
Speaker 1: And I was like, and what I do with my family?

274
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Speaker 1: Is then your motherfucking business. Didn't say motherfucking because I

275
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Speaker 1: don't want to scare these white people. And then I said,

276
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Speaker 1: you know, there's no name for.

277
00:11:37,559 --> 00:11:40,600
Speaker 2: Name calling, like like sugar bumb or something.

278
00:11:40,600 --> 00:11:46,240
Speaker 1: I said, so bonehead, sugar bum.

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Speaker 4: The funniest thing is like you should never come for

280
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Speaker 4: a black woman by calling her a phonehead.

281
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Speaker 1: You're gonna lose. Oh my god. Wow.

282
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Speaker 2: But I'm just wondering, like, are you have you guys,

283
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Speaker 2: like you know, there's a lot of mommy shaming, especially

284
00:12:01,920 --> 00:12:05,640
Speaker 2: a surrounding quarantine, and how what you're doing and who

285
00:12:05,720 --> 00:12:08,160
Speaker 2: you're hanging out with and all those things, like how

286
00:12:08,200 --> 00:12:10,920
Speaker 2: have you guys encountered that out there and how are.

287
00:12:10,800 --> 00:12:11,599
Speaker 3: You dealing with it?

288
00:12:13,000 --> 00:12:16,760
Speaker 5: I feel like people's reaction in Canada is pretty much

289
00:12:16,760 --> 00:12:20,320
Speaker 5: the same in America. People are protesting here that they

290
00:12:20,360 --> 00:12:21,400
Speaker 5: don't want to wear masks.

291
00:12:21,440 --> 00:12:23,840
Speaker 1: Yeah really yeah.

292
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Speaker 5: And then there are people that just don't give a

293
00:12:26,240 --> 00:12:28,720
Speaker 5: shit and are still like going out and doing whatever

294
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Speaker 5: they want to do. And then there are people that

295
00:12:30,800 --> 00:12:34,400
Speaker 5: are paranoid and are indoors at all times. But of course,

296
00:12:34,440 --> 00:12:36,559
Speaker 5: like being a parent, it's hard, Like I don't want

297
00:12:36,600 --> 00:12:40,000
Speaker 5: to stay home every day with my kid, like I'm crazy,

298
00:12:40,000 --> 00:12:43,800
Speaker 5: I'm going crazy. Yeah, and like we have toddlers, so.

299
00:12:44,000 --> 00:12:45,720
Speaker 1: You can how old are how old are your kids?

300
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Speaker 3: My eighteen and a half months. My daughter's twenty months.

301
00:12:49,240 --> 00:12:50,920
Speaker 2: So you're not putting like I'm not putting a mask

302
00:12:50,960 --> 00:12:53,040
Speaker 2: on my eighties like that, Let's be like, let's be honest.

303
00:12:53,040 --> 00:12:54,440
Speaker 2: And if I'm not putting a mask on my eighteen

304
00:12:54,440 --> 00:12:56,640
Speaker 2: month old, and I'm out there like it's very possible

305
00:12:56,640 --> 00:12:57,880
Speaker 2: that you should get something, give it to me.

306
00:12:57,920 --> 00:13:00,640
Speaker 3: Like it's like it doesn't make any sense, you know,

307
00:13:00,800 --> 00:13:04,040
Speaker 3: it's unavoidable. It seems Yeah, it is.

308
00:13:04,080 --> 00:13:07,080
Speaker 1: All I'm saying is like everyone needs to chill, not chill.

309
00:13:07,160 --> 00:13:09,559
Speaker 1: I get it. People are dying, and I'm respectable of that.

310
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Speaker 2: And like I've I have people that have been have died,

311
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Speaker 2: I know people that have died.

312
00:13:15,559 --> 00:13:17,920
Speaker 1: I just also feel like what I do with my

313
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Speaker 1: motherfucking family, like, bitch.

314
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Speaker 3: You don't know.

315
00:13:21,000 --> 00:13:23,239
Speaker 4: You don't know at what point I decided to quarantine

316
00:13:23,240 --> 00:13:25,319
Speaker 4: for fourteen days with my nigga and then introduce him

317
00:13:25,320 --> 00:13:27,200
Speaker 4: to my mom, right or vice versa. You have no

318
00:13:27,240 --> 00:13:29,840
Speaker 4: idea what we're doing over here. And quite frankly, it

319
00:13:29,960 --> 00:13:32,480
Speaker 4: sounds like you're very bored and on edge, bitch, because

320
00:13:32,520 --> 00:13:34,920
Speaker 4: you haven't been anywhere and you ain't smoked no weed,

321
00:13:35,160 --> 00:13:37,520
Speaker 4: and so you're kind of hating it sounds like you're

322
00:13:37,520 --> 00:13:41,800
Speaker 4: hating on us because we've found we've we've found the

323
00:13:41,880 --> 00:13:43,160
Speaker 4: silver lining of this all.

324
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Speaker 3: And I get it.

325
00:13:44,800 --> 00:13:47,600
Speaker 4: You're miserable. We're all we're in the same boat. But

326
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Speaker 4: what you don't need to do is project how you're

327
00:13:49,960 --> 00:13:52,440
Speaker 4: feeling on people who are just dealing with the same

328
00:13:52,440 --> 00:13:52,920
Speaker 4: shit as you.

329
00:13:52,960 --> 00:13:55,680
Speaker 3: Differently. We're all moms, we're all doing the same shit.

330
00:13:55,720 --> 00:13:56,760
Speaker 3: We're all trying our best.

331
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Speaker 4: We're obviously haven't killed our kids. You know, the government

332
00:14:02,000 --> 00:14:05,520
Speaker 4: hasn't come to get them. They're safe, they're happy, they're fed, and.

333
00:14:06,280 --> 00:14:07,480
Speaker 3: You need to mind your fucking business.

334
00:14:07,520 --> 00:14:09,720
Speaker 4: You listen to us for half the episode that was clear,

335
00:14:09,840 --> 00:14:13,000
Speaker 4: so about forty minutes and that's just not enough to

336
00:14:13,120 --> 00:14:16,160
Speaker 4: tell me about me, bitch, mind your business.

337
00:14:16,200 --> 00:14:18,960
Speaker 3: And my friend too will get that ass.

338
00:14:21,680 --> 00:14:24,320
Speaker 1: Yeah, well that handles that.

339
00:14:25,160 --> 00:14:27,040
Speaker 3: Yeah, that question.

340
00:14:28,840 --> 00:14:32,280
Speaker 2: So your your your podcast is called while they napp?

341
00:14:32,360 --> 00:14:34,600
Speaker 2: Do your kids actually nap all your podcasts?

342
00:14:34,640 --> 00:14:35,840
Speaker 1: Like how do you do that?

343
00:14:36,800 --> 00:14:36,880
Speaker 4: Not?

344
00:14:37,120 --> 00:14:41,800
Speaker 2: Like like are you saying like my daughter's downstairs right now,

345
00:14:41,800 --> 00:14:45,120
Speaker 2: in the basement of my husband. Any second, now, any second,

346
00:14:45,120 --> 00:14:47,000
Speaker 2: you're gonna have a kid who running up half naked

347
00:14:47,080 --> 00:14:48,040
Speaker 2: with goldfish in her mouth.

348
00:14:48,960 --> 00:14:52,760
Speaker 4: The goldfish, oh right, the kids love it. How do

349
00:14:53,080 --> 00:14:55,720
Speaker 4: How do your husbands feel about the podcast? And you

350
00:14:55,760 --> 00:15:01,080
Speaker 4: guys like discussing, you know, your real rude feelings about

351
00:15:01,240 --> 00:15:04,800
Speaker 4: motherhood amongst the internets of millions of people.

352
00:15:04,800 --> 00:15:07,120
Speaker 3: Are they like, can you chill? Do you talk about them?

353
00:15:07,160 --> 00:15:11,560
Speaker 3: Are their roles surrounding that in the marriage? No, they

354
00:15:11,600 --> 00:15:12,600
Speaker 3: don't care. They don't care.

355
00:15:12,640 --> 00:15:14,920
Speaker 2: Now at the end of the day, like he knows

356
00:15:14,920 --> 00:15:17,120
Speaker 2: who he married. He's like, I'm a talker. Leanne is

357
00:15:17,120 --> 00:15:18,920
Speaker 2: gonna like voice her opinion. She's gonna say what she

358
00:15:18,960 --> 00:15:20,720
Speaker 2: has to say. He's like, and I don't always want

359
00:15:20,720 --> 00:15:22,000
Speaker 2: to hear that shit. He's like, so at the end

360
00:15:22,040 --> 00:15:23,680
Speaker 2: of the day, like, if you need to release and

361
00:15:23,720 --> 00:15:25,400
Speaker 2: you need to like let that out, go for it,

362
00:15:25,520 --> 00:15:27,920
Speaker 2: like say it all on the podcast, leave it all there.

363
00:15:28,120 --> 00:15:30,120
Speaker 2: Of course, Like we communicate and I'm still able to

364
00:15:30,160 --> 00:15:32,120
Speaker 2: confide in him. But he loves the fact that I have.

365
00:15:32,200 --> 00:15:34,560
Speaker 2: This is the outlet. He thinks it's aka.

366
00:15:34,680 --> 00:15:37,560
Speaker 3: They don't want to talk to us. Oh, you're talking

367
00:15:37,560 --> 00:15:38,200
Speaker 3: to other people.

368
00:15:38,200 --> 00:15:41,280
Speaker 4: Cool, don't give what you're talking about.

369
00:15:43,160 --> 00:15:44,400
Speaker 3: Do your husbands listen?

370
00:15:48,800 --> 00:15:52,000
Speaker 5: It's not depending on the episode, Like if he knows

371
00:15:52,000 --> 00:15:55,120
Speaker 5: that I'm talking about him on that episode, he's gonna listen.

372
00:15:55,400 --> 00:15:57,760
Speaker 2: Yes, Like the Baby Love a Marriage episode where I

373
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Speaker 2: talked about the fact that like six week four parts

374
00:16:00,040 --> 00:16:02,280
Speaker 2: on twelve weeks when I had seven stitches, my asshole

375
00:16:02,320 --> 00:16:03,720
Speaker 2: was completely spread and opened out.

376
00:16:03,600 --> 00:16:06,440
Speaker 3: That I was anything And I was like, you know,

377
00:16:06,680 --> 00:16:07,720
Speaker 3: like no, like I've pissed off.

378
00:16:07,760 --> 00:16:08,000
Speaker 6: I don't.

379
00:16:08,200 --> 00:16:11,560
Speaker 2: He's definitely he was like, oh, okay, so that tell

380
00:16:11,560 --> 00:16:12,440
Speaker 2: me how you really feel.

381
00:16:12,560 --> 00:16:15,040
Speaker 3: Oh, it's like that, Like but he wanted to hear.

382
00:16:15,360 --> 00:16:18,440
Speaker 2: For the most part, they're like, nah, it's.

383
00:16:18,360 --> 00:16:20,320
Speaker 4: Kind of a good excuse to like get them to

384
00:16:20,360 --> 00:16:21,400
Speaker 4: hear what you got to say.

385
00:16:21,440 --> 00:16:24,560
Speaker 3: But not You're like, oh, no, I didn't talk about

386
00:16:24,560 --> 00:16:25,560
Speaker 3: you just a little.

387
00:16:25,480 --> 00:16:27,200
Speaker 1: Just a little. This is how I really feel.

388
00:16:27,600 --> 00:16:28,120
Speaker 4: This is an.

389
00:16:28,000 --> 00:16:32,640
Speaker 3: Announcement to my husband. We just went in. It's true.

390
00:16:33,680 --> 00:16:37,680
Speaker 3: How long have you guys been podcasting? Uh, less than

391
00:16:37,680 --> 00:16:38,800
Speaker 3: a year? No, less than a year.

392
00:16:42,320 --> 00:16:43,320
Speaker 1: How do you think?

393
00:16:43,720 --> 00:16:46,360
Speaker 2: Well, my question aside from podcasting, because you guys have

394
00:16:46,440 --> 00:16:49,880
Speaker 2: toddlers and like I'm so like Mila just recently finally

395
00:16:49,920 --> 00:16:59,040
Speaker 2: stopped calling our kids toddlers because they're like not toddlers anymore. Like,

396
00:16:59,800 --> 00:17:02,040
Speaker 2: do you do you feel like when you after you

397
00:17:02,040 --> 00:17:03,920
Speaker 2: had your daughter? You have wait, you have you have

398
00:17:03,960 --> 00:17:06,120
Speaker 2: a daughter and you have a daughter as well.

399
00:17:06,320 --> 00:17:07,320
Speaker 1: Yeah, daughter.

400
00:17:07,840 --> 00:17:11,640
Speaker 2: Do you feel like like, what was your transition out

401
00:17:11,640 --> 00:17:13,960
Speaker 2: of pregnancy? Did you go through any sort of postpartum

402
00:17:14,240 --> 00:17:15,760
Speaker 2: or were you I mean, you.

403
00:17:15,760 --> 00:17:17,639
Speaker 1: Guys have husbands. We don't know anything about that. We

404
00:17:17,680 --> 00:17:19,040
Speaker 1: don't know what support looks like.

405
00:17:21,560 --> 00:17:23,560
Speaker 2: But also but also you don't have to you can

406
00:17:23,600 --> 00:17:25,520
Speaker 2: have a husband, and I feel supported too, you know.

407
00:17:25,680 --> 00:17:28,440
Speaker 3: So it was interesting.

408
00:17:28,720 --> 00:17:34,399
Speaker 5: I had postpartum anxiety and I didn't really expect that.

409
00:17:34,480 --> 00:17:36,639
Speaker 5: I was expecting postpartum depression.

410
00:17:36,800 --> 00:17:40,680
Speaker 2: What's post partum anxiety? It's like the anxiety to not

411
00:17:40,800 --> 00:17:41,680
Speaker 2: have depression.

412
00:17:42,680 --> 00:17:46,440
Speaker 5: It's I don't know, it's it's hard to explain because

413
00:17:46,560 --> 00:17:49,280
Speaker 5: I assumed it was postpartum depression, but then a nurse

414
00:17:49,280 --> 00:17:52,160
Speaker 5: told me it was postpartum anxiety, which they have now

415
00:17:52,240 --> 00:17:56,520
Speaker 5: separated from postpartum depression because you don't get depressed, but

416
00:17:56,640 --> 00:17:59,960
Speaker 5: your anxiety levels are like on ten thousand, where.

417
00:17:59,840 --> 00:18:03,440
Speaker 3: I didn't sleep for weeks, like not even a little bit.

418
00:18:04,040 --> 00:18:07,119
Speaker 5: As soon as I got home, I like sat over

419
00:18:07,760 --> 00:18:10,760
Speaker 5: the baby, bass in it and in so much fear

420
00:18:12,359 --> 00:18:15,120
Speaker 5: that she was gonna die. And I was like, I

421
00:18:15,240 --> 00:18:17,760
Speaker 5: know that she's fine, but I couldn't help it. I

422
00:18:17,840 --> 00:18:21,240
Speaker 5: was just like so scared and worried. And it lasted

423
00:18:21,359 --> 00:18:24,560
Speaker 5: for maybe like two months. It lasted for like two

424
00:18:24,640 --> 00:18:26,240
Speaker 5: to three months.

425
00:18:25,960 --> 00:18:27,600
Speaker 3: And like, what was that fear that you had that like.

426
00:18:27,520 --> 00:18:30,119
Speaker 5: Someone was gonna come and throw her down this It

427
00:18:30,160 --> 00:18:33,439
Speaker 5: was like these weird intrusive thoughts where I would just

428
00:18:33,440 --> 00:18:35,439
Speaker 5: like wake up and look at my stairs and like

429
00:18:35,640 --> 00:18:37,680
Speaker 5: want to get a knife because I thought someone was

430
00:18:37,720 --> 00:18:40,520
Speaker 5: in my house to throw my baby down the stairs.

431
00:18:40,720 --> 00:18:42,280
Speaker 1: Mama bear was coming.

432
00:18:43,720 --> 00:18:45,320
Speaker 2: Did you feel any of that when you were pregnant

433
00:18:45,359 --> 00:18:47,040
Speaker 2: or it kind of it was like shocking that it.

434
00:18:47,280 --> 00:18:50,440
Speaker 5: I was chilling when I was pregnant. I loved being pregnant.

435
00:18:50,480 --> 00:18:52,879
Speaker 5: It was so it was so chill other than throwing

436
00:18:52,960 --> 00:18:53,920
Speaker 5: up every day.

437
00:18:54,040 --> 00:18:56,240
Speaker 3: I was like, I was so chill.

438
00:18:56,280 --> 00:18:59,680
Speaker 4: I was just yacking every day.

439
00:19:00,000 --> 00:19:03,119
Speaker 3: Favorite part of my love it, I can do it.

440
00:19:03,200 --> 00:19:05,440
Speaker 5: I was still enjoying myself, like I had a great time,

441
00:19:05,520 --> 00:19:08,800
Speaker 5: But nothing prepared me for postpartum.

442
00:19:08,840 --> 00:19:10,760
Speaker 3: I had no idea what was happening to me.

443
00:19:10,880 --> 00:19:13,879
Speaker 5: And I think the craziest thing about that, though, was,

444
00:19:14,480 --> 00:19:16,520
Speaker 5: even though I tried to get help, the thing that

445
00:19:16,600 --> 00:19:19,119
Speaker 5: made me kind of snap out of it is I

446
00:19:19,160 --> 00:19:22,040
Speaker 5: fell down the stairs one day with the baby in

447
00:19:22,080 --> 00:19:26,920
Speaker 5: my arms, and I just remember like huddling her into

448
00:19:26,960 --> 00:19:30,080
Speaker 5: my boobs and like pressing it in and just taking

449
00:19:30,080 --> 00:19:30,480
Speaker 5: the fall.

450
00:19:31,040 --> 00:19:34,360
Speaker 3: It's funny that, Like, it's really funny when it happened.

451
00:19:34,480 --> 00:19:39,080
Speaker 1: That much time don't have boobs over time to not.

452
00:19:42,480 --> 00:19:45,480
Speaker 5: But after that moment, I actually felt better because I

453
00:19:45,520 --> 00:19:46,640
Speaker 5: was like, Okay, I.

454
00:19:46,520 --> 00:19:49,840
Speaker 3: Gotta get my shit together because shit happens.

455
00:19:50,040 --> 00:19:53,080
Speaker 2: Well you are probably you probably almost like you manifested

456
00:19:53,119 --> 00:19:54,399
Speaker 2: the stairfalling, right.

457
00:19:56,760 --> 00:19:58,640
Speaker 1: No, it ain't gonna be no one else but you, bitch.

458
00:19:58,720 --> 00:20:01,159
Speaker 1: It's gonna be you. Other falls the stairs, you know.

459
00:20:01,720 --> 00:20:02,720
Speaker 1: You know it's funny about that.

460
00:20:02,760 --> 00:20:06,600
Speaker 3: I have never heard of the term postpredum postpartum.

461
00:20:05,920 --> 00:20:09,000
Speaker 4: Anxiety either, but I told my good friend who has

462
00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:11,640
Speaker 4: three girls, like she had kids wade before me. When I,

463
00:20:11,680 --> 00:20:14,960
Speaker 4: like first had my baby, I kept having these extreme

464
00:20:15,160 --> 00:20:18,760
Speaker 4: thoughts like I'm gonna fall, she's gonna drop, someone's gonna

465
00:20:18,760 --> 00:20:20,879
Speaker 4: pick her up and take her the shoulder's gonna go

466
00:20:20,920 --> 00:20:24,840
Speaker 4: over the hill and tumble down, like all these extreme thoughts.

467
00:20:24,840 --> 00:20:25,919
Speaker 3: And she was like, that's normal.

468
00:20:26,000 --> 00:20:28,119
Speaker 4: She was like, that's a part of you, like almost

469
00:20:28,200 --> 00:20:31,800
Speaker 4: your body training for anything could could happen, and for

470
00:20:31,920 --> 00:20:33,760
Speaker 4: like what you could do, what you would do.

471
00:20:34,440 --> 00:20:35,040
Speaker 1: Your body.

472
00:20:36,880 --> 00:20:39,080
Speaker 4: Because I was having like terrible I was having like

473
00:20:39,200 --> 00:20:42,879
Speaker 4: the most extreme visions too, like just I opened.

474
00:20:42,600 --> 00:20:45,000
Speaker 3: The door and let you know, just the worst of

475
00:20:45,040 --> 00:20:47,159
Speaker 3: the worst things I could possibly happen. And I was like,

476
00:20:47,240 --> 00:20:47,840
Speaker 3: what the fuck?

477
00:20:48,240 --> 00:20:50,760
Speaker 4: And She's like, no, these are normal thoughts because that's

478
00:20:50,840 --> 00:20:54,359
Speaker 4: like how your mind prepares you to tire boobs and

479
00:20:54,359 --> 00:20:55,760
Speaker 4: a not if you're falling down the stairs.

480
00:20:56,800 --> 00:20:58,879
Speaker 2: I think probably cause I think the problem though, is

481
00:20:58,920 --> 00:21:01,280
Speaker 2: that when it happens, and it VENTCI from doing things right.

482
00:21:01,320 --> 00:21:02,760
Speaker 2: So like in her case, like I had this a

483
00:21:02,760 --> 00:21:05,200
Speaker 2: similar thing, where like mine didn't last nearly as long.

484
00:21:05,280 --> 00:21:07,960
Speaker 2: But I hear that it's very common for parents to

485
00:21:08,080 --> 00:21:10,159
Speaker 2: like watch their kids sleep, and that was especially it

486
00:21:10,240 --> 00:21:11,800
Speaker 2: was so real for me, like, oh my gosh, that's

487
00:21:11,800 --> 00:21:13,480
Speaker 2: why I CoA slept for as long as I did,

488
00:21:13,720 --> 00:21:15,280
Speaker 2: like I co slept. So she was like four and

489
00:21:15,320 --> 00:21:17,160
Speaker 2: a half months because I was so nervous a while

490
00:21:17,160 --> 00:21:18,760
Speaker 2: putting her in the crib, I'm like, oh my god, Like,

491
00:21:18,800 --> 00:21:20,480
Speaker 2: what happens if she stops reathing and I'm not there?

492
00:21:20,760 --> 00:21:22,400
Speaker 2: And that's like everyone was like, because she can still

493
00:21:22,440 --> 00:21:24,480
Speaker 2: stop reathing next to you, but the risk of that

494
00:21:24,960 --> 00:21:28,320
Speaker 2: was so it just consumed me so like it's just

495
00:21:28,359 --> 00:21:30,280
Speaker 2: it's scary, Like it's just a shit that you don't

496
00:21:30,320 --> 00:21:32,879
Speaker 2: even realize that you're gonna have to experience. Like I

497
00:21:32,920 --> 00:21:35,520
Speaker 2: think there's so much prep I feel like for pregnancy,

498
00:21:35,720 --> 00:21:38,959
Speaker 2: but not nearly enough prep for or understanding of what

499
00:21:39,000 --> 00:21:39,680
Speaker 2: happens after.

500
00:21:39,960 --> 00:21:43,840
Speaker 1: Yeah, oh absolutely, I mean I mean even speaking.

501
00:21:43,480 --> 00:21:45,280
Speaker 2: Like, we were looking on your page and I know

502
00:21:45,359 --> 00:21:48,320
Speaker 2: you guys had posted this video about the how the

503
00:21:48,320 --> 00:21:52,159
Speaker 2: oscars had rejected this commercial about like, you know, the

504
00:21:52,200 --> 00:21:57,320
Speaker 2: post what happens postpartum to your body? And nobody told

505
00:21:57,440 --> 00:22:00,400
Speaker 2: me that shit. No one told me I was wearing

506
00:22:00,400 --> 00:22:00,879
Speaker 2: a diaper.

507
00:22:01,119 --> 00:22:02,040
Speaker 3: I didn't think about it.

508
00:22:02,080 --> 00:22:03,680
Speaker 1: I didn't even think about it.

509
00:22:03,800 --> 00:22:06,959
Speaker 3: I was never gonna be so happy with my new baby. Nostrolla.

510
00:22:07,119 --> 00:22:11,000
Speaker 1: Why did my female doctor not tell me that I

511
00:22:11,000 --> 00:22:11,159
Speaker 1: have a.

512
00:22:11,200 --> 00:22:12,000
Speaker 3: Female doctor too?

513
00:22:12,080 --> 00:22:14,760
Speaker 4: And there was not a lot of conversation about the

514
00:22:14,840 --> 00:22:16,840
Speaker 4: aftercare that was going to be required.

515
00:22:17,040 --> 00:22:18,000
Speaker 3: It was crazy.

516
00:22:18,160 --> 00:22:20,159
Speaker 2: I was like, what I just I just remember like

517
00:22:20,200 --> 00:22:22,120
Speaker 2: when I was watching that video and I was watching

518
00:22:23,000 --> 00:22:25,359
Speaker 2: her struggle, you know, get out of the bed using

519
00:22:25,400 --> 00:22:29,920
Speaker 2: the like the hairry, the Perry bottles, springle bottle, all

520
00:22:29,920 --> 00:22:31,920
Speaker 2: that stuff, Like I remember, I think, and I told

521
00:22:31,920 --> 00:22:34,679
Speaker 2: the story before, like I really I would sit on

522
00:22:34,720 --> 00:22:36,640
Speaker 2: the couch, I'd get up and there DP and I'd

523
00:22:36,640 --> 00:22:39,040
Speaker 2: be like, what the fuck I keep And I'm like

524
00:22:39,040 --> 00:22:41,439
Speaker 2: I didn't even know. I didn't even feel myself peeing, like.

525
00:22:41,359 --> 00:22:42,040
Speaker 1: And it would happen.

526
00:22:42,040 --> 00:22:45,560
Speaker 2: It happened to me for about like almost like two months,

527
00:22:45,600 --> 00:22:47,360
Speaker 2: and I was like so.

528
00:22:48,200 --> 00:22:50,159
Speaker 1: Depressed about it. I thought I was never going to

529
00:22:50,240 --> 00:22:52,320
Speaker 1: be the same again. I was. I felt gross.

530
00:22:52,400 --> 00:22:54,439
Speaker 2: I felt like my man was like I'm married, Like

531
00:22:54,600 --> 00:22:58,520
Speaker 2: my bitch is like four hundred years old, now kiss

532
00:22:58,520 --> 00:22:59,720
Speaker 2: it everywhere.

533
00:23:00,680 --> 00:23:02,480
Speaker 3: Age four hundred years Oh my god.

534
00:23:02,520 --> 00:23:04,840
Speaker 2: I remember we went to Target and we got out

535
00:23:04,840 --> 00:23:06,480
Speaker 2: of the car and I was so excited to finally

536
00:23:06,520 --> 00:23:08,360
Speaker 2: get out of the house. And then I just went

537
00:23:08,400 --> 00:23:10,280
Speaker 2: to get up out of the car and I peed

538
00:23:10,320 --> 00:23:12,760
Speaker 2: on the seat and I just started fucking.

539
00:23:12,359 --> 00:23:16,000
Speaker 1: Bawling and he was like, oh no, and he had

540
00:23:16,000 --> 00:23:18,000
Speaker 1: to go up there and get me some depend.

541
00:23:19,520 --> 00:23:21,000
Speaker 2: I had to wear depends, and I tried to get

542
00:23:21,000 --> 00:23:22,680
Speaker 2: the ones that had designs on them so they still

543
00:23:22,680 --> 00:23:24,240
Speaker 2: feel like drawn, but they don't.

544
00:23:24,320 --> 00:23:27,440
Speaker 3: They don't feel like that, not underwear that still depends.

545
00:23:27,600 --> 00:23:29,840
Speaker 3: And then I had to put like my my pacticle

546
00:23:29,920 --> 00:23:30,280
Speaker 3: in there.

547
00:23:30,440 --> 00:23:33,359
Speaker 2: So I was like, well, Olivaron, it was frozen because

548
00:23:33,359 --> 00:23:35,280
Speaker 2: I had a second degree tarang.

549
00:23:37,600 --> 00:23:39,200
Speaker 1: So they had to sew They had to sew it up.

550
00:23:39,520 --> 00:23:42,159
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's seven stitches, so that's just crazy.

551
00:23:42,160 --> 00:23:43,679
Speaker 2: I had to sit on a donut pillow for like

552
00:23:43,720 --> 00:23:48,160
Speaker 2: almost two months, so I thought like, yo, there's no

553
00:23:48,320 --> 00:23:51,399
Speaker 2: way my couch is gonna return to there's it's not

554
00:23:51,480 --> 00:23:52,240
Speaker 2: humanly possible.

555
00:23:52,320 --> 00:23:53,160
Speaker 3: This is this is.

556
00:23:53,119 --> 00:23:55,960
Speaker 1: Probably is better low key now because you have sewed.

557
00:23:55,760 --> 00:24:02,760
Speaker 3: Up an extra tape. You listen to me brand New Men's.

558
00:24:05,240 --> 00:24:07,359
Speaker 1: Wait, were you scared to have sex after that?

559
00:24:07,480 --> 00:24:07,600
Speaker 2: Like?

560
00:24:07,640 --> 00:24:09,960
Speaker 1: How did like what was the how did you do that?

561
00:24:11,240 --> 00:24:13,119
Speaker 2: Like I talked I'm telling you so on that episode

562
00:24:13,119 --> 00:24:16,800
Speaker 2: we talked about I was petrified, like so so scared.

563
00:24:16,840 --> 00:24:20,080
Speaker 3: I'm like, this is worse than virginity, way worse.

564
00:24:20,400 --> 00:24:24,359
Speaker 2: Worse because it's like and it's just like legitimately like

565
00:24:24,440 --> 00:24:27,119
Speaker 2: the smallest, like little thing trying to like it was

566
00:24:27,160 --> 00:24:27,800
Speaker 2: just it was awful.

567
00:24:27,840 --> 00:24:29,800
Speaker 1: It was awful. Oh so it did. So it did

568
00:24:29,880 --> 00:24:31,040
Speaker 1: hurt the first.

569
00:24:30,800 --> 00:24:33,320
Speaker 3: Time, and it's just like, you know, you can't. It's

570
00:24:33,359 --> 00:24:35,440
Speaker 3: it's hard. Like I have a Jamaican husband, you know,

571
00:24:36,440 --> 00:24:39,160
Speaker 3: and here he's like he's a Jamaican man all around.

572
00:24:39,560 --> 00:24:47,800
Speaker 3: I'm like, huh, Jamaican men. She's taking the Jamaican husband. Huh.

573
00:24:49,040 --> 00:24:51,439
Speaker 2: You can't put you can't bring that over here, like

574
00:24:51,520 --> 00:24:53,280
Speaker 2: not now, not any time, like anywhere.

575
00:24:53,280 --> 00:24:54,280
Speaker 3: And it was just it was terrible.

576
00:24:54,320 --> 00:24:57,159
Speaker 2: We went to a really really rough paths because you know,

577
00:24:57,600 --> 00:24:59,280
Speaker 2: they say to the doctor, I mean, the doctor says

578
00:24:59,280 --> 00:25:00,640
Speaker 2: to them like sixty week.

579
00:25:00,520 --> 00:25:04,080
Speaker 3: Six weeks, and they're keeping count. Yeah what I'm like, okay,

580
00:25:04,880 --> 00:25:06,960
Speaker 3: every day twelve I am, so.

581
00:25:08,440 --> 00:25:12,200
Speaker 2: Week five, I think twelve am, so it's been six weeks.

582
00:25:12,280 --> 00:25:15,439
Speaker 3: Twelve am on the dots.

583
00:25:18,440 --> 00:25:21,720
Speaker 2: Oh God, like you know what i mean. Put the

584
00:25:21,760 --> 00:25:23,720
Speaker 2: baby to bed, close the roof to her crib. I

585
00:25:23,720 --> 00:25:24,680
Speaker 2: turned around fully naked.

586
00:25:24,680 --> 00:25:28,280
Speaker 3: Man, I'm like what you're standing there?

587
00:25:28,400 --> 00:25:33,280
Speaker 1: Like I'm here. I don't.

588
00:25:34,040 --> 00:25:35,879
Speaker 3: Man, it was a mess. It was a mess. It

589
00:25:35,920 --> 00:25:36,840
Speaker 3: was really really hard.

590
00:25:36,880 --> 00:25:39,440
Speaker 2: It was really scary, but eventually, like we worked at

591
00:25:39,440 --> 00:25:41,320
Speaker 2: it and like you know, we were patient. We did

592
00:25:41,359 --> 00:25:44,000
Speaker 2: all the things, all the different tricks, all the lube,

593
00:25:44,000 --> 00:25:46,840
Speaker 2: and like the grace of God, like we were in

594
00:25:46,880 --> 00:25:49,320
Speaker 2: there like somewhere, but you're back.

595
00:25:51,080 --> 00:25:54,560
Speaker 3: Do you guys want to have more kids? I want

596
00:25:54,560 --> 00:25:56,960
Speaker 3: one more? No, I'm not right now.

597
00:25:57,160 --> 00:26:00,920
Speaker 1: No, you might change your mind, but yeah, or.

598
00:26:03,359 --> 00:26:05,400
Speaker 3: Are you saying that like a vision? Ain't got no kids.

599
00:26:05,440 --> 00:26:06,920
Speaker 1: I just trying to be nice. I don't know you

600
00:26:07,000 --> 00:26:08,720
Speaker 1: could change? Might you don't be open?

601
00:26:10,760 --> 00:26:12,040
Speaker 3: Do you want another kid?

602
00:26:13,080 --> 00:26:13,520
Speaker 1: I know?

603
00:26:13,680 --> 00:26:15,800
Speaker 2: I mean I love my baby and like I'm in

604
00:26:15,840 --> 00:26:18,879
Speaker 2: a relationship now, and like he really wants kids.

605
00:26:19,000 --> 00:26:21,760
Speaker 4: He wants like kids, like more, as in more than one,

606
00:26:21,880 --> 00:26:24,000
Speaker 4: more specifically twins.

607
00:26:24,320 --> 00:26:27,000
Speaker 3: I used to really want twins until I heard your story.

608
00:26:27,240 --> 00:26:29,320
Speaker 5: I wanted twins as well, but I'm like, if you

609
00:26:29,359 --> 00:26:31,359
Speaker 5: don't get it the first time, I don't want them.

610
00:26:31,840 --> 00:26:34,320
Speaker 2: I don't want he specifically wants twins because I may

611
00:26:34,359 --> 00:26:36,160
Speaker 2: I fucked up and told him that I could potentially

612
00:26:36,200 --> 00:26:36,640
Speaker 2: have twins.

613
00:26:36,680 --> 00:26:37,080
Speaker 3: You can't.

614
00:26:37,520 --> 00:26:40,760
Speaker 4: That's fucky, and isn't it sounds like the Devil's cool?

615
00:26:42,400 --> 00:26:46,440
Speaker 2: Sounds like the devil in motion. So if he doesn't

616
00:26:46,440 --> 00:26:48,720
Speaker 2: get twins, he said he would at least like two.

617
00:26:48,760 --> 00:26:53,520
Speaker 1: I said, at least you lucky if ever you get one. Yeah,

618
00:26:53,560 --> 00:26:54,200
Speaker 1: So I don't know.

619
00:26:54,320 --> 00:26:57,120
Speaker 2: Like I was actually having this conversation with my mom

620
00:26:57,160 --> 00:26:59,320
Speaker 2: today too, because she was like, I asked me if

621
00:26:59,400 --> 00:27:01,640
Speaker 2: he wanted kids, and I said, yeah, he does, and

622
00:27:01,680 --> 00:27:05,040
Speaker 2: she's like do you And I said, I don't know.

623
00:27:05,200 --> 00:27:05,760
Speaker 1: I don't think.

624
00:27:05,800 --> 00:27:07,399
Speaker 2: So I'm like, it's a lot, and she was like,

625
00:27:07,480 --> 00:27:09,280
Speaker 2: you know, She's like, I know, I say this a

626
00:27:09,280 --> 00:27:13,160
Speaker 2: lot because my mom and I are semi living parallel lives.

627
00:27:13,320 --> 00:27:16,480
Speaker 1: Is like how we both became single moms.

628
00:27:16,119 --> 00:27:18,920
Speaker 2: And like whatever, and she's like, I know, I say

629
00:27:18,960 --> 00:27:21,119
Speaker 2: this a lot, like I've been through this, but like, honestly,

630
00:27:21,240 --> 00:27:25,119
Speaker 2: like having a support having a partner and someone who's supportive,

631
00:27:25,400 --> 00:27:28,320
Speaker 2: it makes a world of difference. Like my experience with you,

632
00:27:28,560 --> 00:27:32,199
Speaker 2: Erica is ten times different than it was with Cruise,

633
00:27:32,280 --> 00:27:35,440
Speaker 2: my brother, because her and my stepdad are together. He's

634
00:27:35,480 --> 00:27:37,800
Speaker 2: a great father, he's involved. And I was like, yeah,

635
00:27:37,840 --> 00:27:41,320
Speaker 2: I don't know what that's like. It still sounds scary, not.

636
00:27:41,200 --> 00:27:43,160
Speaker 1: That like her dad, not that my daughter's dad isn't

637
00:27:43,160 --> 00:27:43,720
Speaker 1: a great father.

638
00:27:43,760 --> 00:27:45,760
Speaker 2: But it's like he's not in my house. I didn't

639
00:27:45,800 --> 00:27:50,240
Speaker 2: have that support system like built in. So she was like,

640
00:27:50,320 --> 00:27:51,159
Speaker 2: just be open to it.

641
00:27:51,280 --> 00:27:54,240
Speaker 1: So I'm like, okay, maybe, but I don't know.

642
00:27:54,280 --> 00:27:56,440
Speaker 2: People be crazy, Like you bet with someone for seven

643
00:27:56,520 --> 00:27:58,200
Speaker 2: years and they show up and be crazy and then

644
00:27:58,320 --> 00:27:59,560
Speaker 2: boom your mom again.

645
00:27:59,680 --> 00:28:00,840
Speaker 1: I just know if I want to do this be

646
00:28:00,880 --> 00:28:02,120
Speaker 1: a single parent again too.

647
00:28:02,600 --> 00:28:06,000
Speaker 4: I you would have to submit me to the like

648
00:28:06,040 --> 00:28:07,240
Speaker 4: you would have to put me somewhere.

649
00:28:07,240 --> 00:28:12,480
Speaker 3: I would definitely be on a lot of xanax.

650
00:28:13,280 --> 00:28:14,840
Speaker 2: I literally just I thought, you can say you have

651
00:28:14,920 --> 00:28:18,080
Speaker 2: to put me down, I drug you and pregnate.

652
00:28:17,640 --> 00:28:19,399
Speaker 1: You, le me down.

653
00:28:23,400 --> 00:28:26,679
Speaker 3: Handmaid's tail. I think I have.

654
00:28:26,840 --> 00:28:27,000
Speaker 2: I have.

655
00:28:27,119 --> 00:28:31,280
Speaker 4: I call it post traumatic baby daddy disorder. I I

656
00:28:32,240 --> 00:28:36,000
Speaker 4: I my decisions aren't trustworthy. I can't trust my decision making.

657
00:28:36,160 --> 00:28:40,640
Speaker 4: So it's just hard. Like honestly, the thought of having

658
00:28:40,920 --> 00:28:43,239
Speaker 4: two kids, which I'd hate to say this, I know

659
00:28:43,400 --> 00:28:44,120
Speaker 4: this is a stigma.

660
00:28:44,160 --> 00:28:44,840
Speaker 3: It doesn't matter.

661
00:28:44,920 --> 00:28:48,400
Speaker 4: But two kids, two baby daddies and neither of them working.

662
00:28:48,680 --> 00:28:49,240
Speaker 1: Oh.

663
00:28:49,520 --> 00:28:52,240
Speaker 4: I mean, I know ericam Dedo does it with grace

664
00:28:52,320 --> 00:28:55,200
Speaker 4: and style, but I just it would make me maybe.

665
00:28:55,000 --> 00:28:57,440
Speaker 3: Jump out of the window, just because it's so hard.

666
00:28:58,320 --> 00:29:01,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a lot of personalities, it's a lot of schedules,

667
00:29:01,280 --> 00:29:03,400
Speaker 2: a lot of time. That's a lot, it's a lot,

668
00:29:03,480 --> 00:29:06,240
Speaker 2: a lot of money. Yeah yeah, I'm like, one.

669
00:29:06,080 --> 00:29:08,520
Speaker 1: Of you, motherfucker's better be a genius or one of y'all.

670
00:29:08,520 --> 00:29:10,040
Speaker 4: Ain't going to y'all, but are come out with it,

671
00:29:10,360 --> 00:29:11,880
Speaker 4: come out with the winning lottery ticket.

672
00:29:11,920 --> 00:29:13,520
Speaker 3: I don't need to wait eighteen years. You need to

673
00:29:13,600 --> 00:29:19,920
Speaker 3: come out waiving the numbers. That is it. And also

674
00:29:20,080 --> 00:29:22,400
Speaker 3: I think about, like, yeah.

675
00:29:22,160 --> 00:29:25,920
Speaker 4: That period right after having a baby and like trying

676
00:29:25,960 --> 00:29:27,720
Speaker 4: to figure out like who am I am?

677
00:29:27,720 --> 00:29:28,560
Speaker 3: I just a mom?

678
00:29:28,720 --> 00:29:29,760
Speaker 1: Am I am cow?

679
00:29:30,240 --> 00:29:32,640
Speaker 4: I have to also tend to you you want to

680
00:29:32,760 --> 00:29:37,000
Speaker 4: have sex, like oh shit, it's a weird like place

681
00:29:37,040 --> 00:29:39,520
Speaker 4: to navigate that nobody really does give you tips on

682
00:29:39,640 --> 00:29:45,320
Speaker 4: because hello, it's so crazy, like watching that thing, that

683
00:29:45,600 --> 00:29:48,800
Speaker 4: commercial that the Oscars didn't approve for obvious reasons. This

684
00:29:48,880 --> 00:29:52,560
Speaker 4: is America, and the shit we paint of pregnancy and

685
00:29:52,640 --> 00:29:56,080
Speaker 4: of labor and everything is nine times out of the

686
00:29:56,080 --> 00:29:59,200
Speaker 4: ten the opposite of the truth. But yeah, like it's

687
00:29:59,200 --> 00:30:02,240
Speaker 4: just like they almost say, almost sugarcoated for moms on purpose,

688
00:30:02,520 --> 00:30:05,520
Speaker 4: only the labor parts seems intense on TV, but then

689
00:30:05,600 --> 00:30:07,960
Speaker 4: everything else is like sugar and candy because they don't

690
00:30:08,080 --> 00:30:09,680
Speaker 4: they want us to keep populating the world.

691
00:30:10,320 --> 00:30:11,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's true.

692
00:30:11,280 --> 00:30:17,080
Speaker 3: So they can kill us with diet and COVID all

693
00:30:17,120 --> 00:30:18,080
Speaker 3: of the things.

694
00:30:18,080 --> 00:30:18,440
Speaker 1: Strange.

695
00:30:18,720 --> 00:30:20,440
Speaker 3: Yeah, tell us because I think it's so important.

696
00:30:20,480 --> 00:30:22,200
Speaker 2: Like you, like, you end up feeling that's when you

697
00:30:22,200 --> 00:30:24,240
Speaker 2: start to feel alone because you see it on TV

698
00:30:24,320 --> 00:30:25,480
Speaker 2: and you're like, that's not what I thought it was

699
00:30:25,520 --> 00:30:25,840
Speaker 2: gonna be.

700
00:30:26,120 --> 00:30:26,840
Speaker 3: So you're damn right.

701
00:30:26,880 --> 00:30:29,200
Speaker 2: When it's two AM and I'm in the freaking washingtom

702
00:30:29,360 --> 00:30:31,720
Speaker 2: squirting this shit in my vagina to try and soothe

703
00:30:31,720 --> 00:30:34,600
Speaker 2: it so that while I'm peeing, I'm not crying, because legitimately,

704
00:30:34,640 --> 00:30:36,800
Speaker 2: the first three times I pee up was like physically

705
00:30:36,800 --> 00:30:39,840
Speaker 2: crying because it was burning so much. It's like, yeah,

706
00:30:40,000 --> 00:30:42,400
Speaker 2: like make that normal so that I don't feel so weird,

707
00:30:42,800 --> 00:30:43,760
Speaker 2: because at least I.

708
00:30:43,720 --> 00:30:45,880
Speaker 3: Know what I'm I'm getting myself into.

709
00:30:46,200 --> 00:30:47,120
Speaker 1: Right, they don't tell you that.

710
00:30:47,120 --> 00:30:50,200
Speaker 2: They're like, it's gonna be great, it's gonna beautiful, it's

711
00:30:50,200 --> 00:30:53,880
Speaker 2: gonna be so wonderful, not like, oh, by the way,

712
00:30:53,920 --> 00:30:56,120
Speaker 2: you might rip, you're gonna have to spray vagina.

713
00:30:56,280 --> 00:30:57,560
Speaker 1: Don't lie. I wear diapers.

714
00:30:57,600 --> 00:31:00,680
Speaker 2: Oh, and that's oh and also pooping, Yeah, that first

715
00:31:00,680 --> 00:31:05,320
Speaker 2: poop is gonna be fucking horrible. I almost forgot that

716
00:31:05,360 --> 00:31:08,560
Speaker 2: first poop, That first poop, that's ruin your life. And

717
00:31:08,680 --> 00:31:10,760
Speaker 2: doesn't it take like a minute, because I've drugged you

718
00:31:10,840 --> 00:31:14,040
Speaker 2: up so hard. I was didn't poop for like two days,

719
00:31:14,400 --> 00:31:17,880
Speaker 2: two weeks. It was a long time weeks And I'm

720
00:31:17,880 --> 00:31:20,040
Speaker 2: not joking. I kept saying to myself the entire time,

721
00:31:20,080 --> 00:31:21,920
Speaker 2: I'm like, you push out a baby. You pushed out

722
00:31:21,960 --> 00:31:22,320
Speaker 2: a baby.

723
00:31:22,480 --> 00:31:23,120
Speaker 3: That's the only way I.

724
00:31:23,080 --> 00:31:23,640
Speaker 1: Can get through it.

725
00:31:23,760 --> 00:31:26,640
Speaker 2: Because the pain was so I could not convince myself

726
00:31:26,640 --> 00:31:27,719
Speaker 2: that I would be able to do it.

727
00:31:27,880 --> 00:31:29,600
Speaker 3: I'm like, there's no way. I'm like, you push out

728
00:31:29,600 --> 00:31:33,040
Speaker 3: a baby, you can push out a turn. It's a turn.

729
00:31:33,440 --> 00:31:33,640
Speaker 1: See.

730
00:31:33,680 --> 00:31:35,240
Speaker 2: I didn't even I didn't even get to push out

731
00:31:35,240 --> 00:31:35,680
Speaker 2: my baby.

732
00:31:35,720 --> 00:31:36,000
Speaker 1: Okay.

733
00:31:36,040 --> 00:31:38,840
Speaker 2: So I was just dealing with incision like I had.

734
00:31:39,040 --> 00:31:41,160
Speaker 2: I had a sea section, not by choice, trust me,

735
00:31:41,240 --> 00:31:42,000
Speaker 2: that's a whole other.

736
00:31:42,800 --> 00:31:45,480
Speaker 1: Mis not miscommunication did in miscommunication.

737
00:31:45,480 --> 00:31:49,080
Speaker 2: My doctor knew exactly what she was doing, but I

738
00:31:49,440 --> 00:31:51,520
Speaker 2: so then I had this decision. I was in so

739
00:31:51,640 --> 00:31:53,880
Speaker 2: much pain recovering from my sea section. Some people be

740
00:31:53,920 --> 00:31:56,560
Speaker 2: acting like the sea section recovery is a breeze, not

741
00:31:56,720 --> 00:31:59,800
Speaker 2: for me. And I just remember having finally like I.

742
00:31:59,720 --> 00:32:01,280
Speaker 1: Was like, okay, I think I have to I think

743
00:32:01,280 --> 00:32:03,080
Speaker 1: I have to poop now, Okay, So.

744
00:32:03,080 --> 00:32:05,120
Speaker 2: I went to the bathroom and I was like, oh no,

745
00:32:05,480 --> 00:32:07,760
Speaker 2: I don't think I don't think my Bible can stretch

746
00:32:07,800 --> 00:32:08,400
Speaker 2: this winde.

747
00:32:08,640 --> 00:32:11,080
Speaker 1: There's just no way that it could ever come out.

748
00:32:11,360 --> 00:32:13,680
Speaker 2: Like it literally felt like a bowling ball was trying

749
00:32:13,680 --> 00:32:14,440
Speaker 2: to get out.

750
00:32:14,880 --> 00:32:18,360
Speaker 1: I remember that it was so much pressure. I was

751
00:32:18,440 --> 00:32:21,920
Speaker 1: like and I was just breathing. I was crying. And

752
00:32:21,920 --> 00:32:25,240
Speaker 1: then I remember when it finally like passed, like, oh

753
00:32:25,280 --> 00:32:25,560
Speaker 1: my god.

754
00:32:25,600 --> 00:32:28,200
Speaker 2: I looked down. That was the weirdest shape poop I'd

755
00:32:28,200 --> 00:32:30,680
Speaker 2: ever seen. Not everyone knows these you know about my poops,

756
00:32:30,720 --> 00:32:32,040
Speaker 2: but it was just.

757
00:32:31,960 --> 00:32:35,440
Speaker 4: It's all dark from all the meds they give you. Yeah,

758
00:32:35,960 --> 00:32:38,320
Speaker 4: they don't tell they literally tell you shit. I didn't

759
00:32:38,360 --> 00:32:40,479
Speaker 4: want to have a baby in a hospital, and I

760
00:32:40,560 --> 00:32:42,280
Speaker 4: ended up having a baby in the hospital. And as

761
00:32:42,320 --> 00:32:44,000
Speaker 4: soon as I got to the hospital, I realized why

762
00:32:44,560 --> 00:32:46,320
Speaker 4: after I had the baby, is it just me like

763
00:32:46,360 --> 00:32:47,959
Speaker 4: I feel like every two hours, if it was two

764
00:32:48,000 --> 00:32:49,520
Speaker 4: o'clock in the morning, four o'clock of morning. They just

765
00:32:49,560 --> 00:32:52,160
Speaker 4: would wake up a new lady was like handing me

766
00:32:52,200 --> 00:32:53,440
Speaker 4: a couple of pills and taking it.

767
00:32:53,480 --> 00:32:55,440
Speaker 3: I have no fucking clue what those people were giving.

768
00:32:56,280 --> 00:32:57,000
Speaker 1: I was just taking it.

769
00:32:57,000 --> 00:33:00,920
Speaker 3: I was just like, oh no, I didn't even ask

770
00:33:00,960 --> 00:33:03,880
Speaker 3: any questions. It's just like, I mean, okay, and then

771
00:33:04,040 --> 00:33:08,080
Speaker 3: you can't poke for two weeks. Oh god, this is

772
00:33:08,120 --> 00:33:08,960
Speaker 3: the worst shit ever.

773
00:33:09,320 --> 00:33:11,760
Speaker 4: Oh there's so many things I forgot about this process

774
00:33:11,800 --> 00:33:13,160
Speaker 4: that are coming back to me that is making me

775
00:33:13,920 --> 00:33:14,960
Speaker 4: to think about a second.

776
00:33:14,800 --> 00:33:16,680
Speaker 3: Kid, how do you bring it up?

777
00:33:16,720 --> 00:33:19,240
Speaker 2: I'm like, no, no, no, no, I don't I answer so

778
00:33:19,320 --> 00:33:20,800
Speaker 2: confidently and I'm like no.

779
00:33:21,640 --> 00:33:25,520
Speaker 4: And for you guys, did your like my my my

780
00:33:25,600 --> 00:33:29,320
Speaker 4: belly got like super darker than the rest of my body.

781
00:33:29,760 --> 00:33:32,520
Speaker 4: So my boobs and like the second day got huge

782
00:33:32,520 --> 00:33:34,120
Speaker 4: as fuck, Like I got a double deal on the

783
00:33:34,120 --> 00:33:35,280
Speaker 4: plastic surgery table.

784
00:33:35,640 --> 00:33:36,040
Speaker 1: Yesterday.

785
00:33:36,040 --> 00:33:38,120
Speaker 4: They were so hard. I was like, this is great,

786
00:33:38,480 --> 00:33:41,160
Speaker 4: but where am I gonna go? And they hurt, They're

787
00:33:41,160 --> 00:33:42,720
Speaker 4: all veiny. I was like, oh my god, my boobs

788
00:33:42,720 --> 00:33:47,880
Speaker 4: look great. What's wrong with my stomach? My stomach with

789
00:33:47,920 --> 00:33:50,120
Speaker 4: the same color as my shirt and my face was

790
00:33:50,160 --> 00:33:51,160
Speaker 4: still the regular color.

791
00:33:51,200 --> 00:33:55,080
Speaker 3: I was like, is this gonna go away? What is happening?

792
00:33:55,200 --> 00:33:57,720
Speaker 3: And she's like, shoot your hormones. I'm like, my hormones

793
00:33:57,760 --> 00:33:59,280
Speaker 3: are making me change colors.

794
00:34:00,800 --> 00:34:02,160
Speaker 1: My boobs look great.

795
00:34:02,560 --> 00:34:06,160
Speaker 3: My nipples, my areolas were as dark like this.

796
00:34:06,480 --> 00:34:08,640
Speaker 4: Yeah, like my stomach and my nipples I look like

797
00:34:08,680 --> 00:34:13,880
Speaker 4: the fucking National geographic and like huge nipples, baby boobs.

798
00:34:13,920 --> 00:34:15,239
Speaker 3: I literally I was like, I'm a cow.

799
00:34:15,440 --> 00:34:15,919
Speaker 1: I'm a cow.

800
00:34:17,200 --> 00:34:20,480
Speaker 2: That black, black stomach and that black line, that line

801
00:34:20,480 --> 00:34:21,120
Speaker 2: that took forever.

802
00:34:21,600 --> 00:34:24,200
Speaker 3: I thought it was never gonna do. I'm like guilt away.

803
00:34:24,200 --> 00:34:26,160
Speaker 2: And I had an Audi, so like I already have

804
00:34:26,239 --> 00:34:28,440
Speaker 2: an audi, so imagine then once I had a baby,

805
00:34:28,480 --> 00:34:30,959
Speaker 2: like it was a nose, it was a full news.

806
00:34:31,680 --> 00:34:33,759
Speaker 2: How so after you had your baby, I mean I

807
00:34:33,760 --> 00:34:36,040
Speaker 2: don't know, like if you guys like for me, like

808
00:34:36,080 --> 00:34:38,239
Speaker 2: I gained seventy pounds in my pregnancy and after I

809
00:34:38,239 --> 00:34:40,080
Speaker 2: had my kid, like I was like, who is this?

810
00:34:40,200 --> 00:34:42,719
Speaker 1: What is this body I've been left with? Like what

811
00:34:42,840 --> 00:34:45,120
Speaker 1: is this? Like leftover shit here?

812
00:34:45,719 --> 00:34:47,759
Speaker 2: Like you guys are you guys are married and like

813
00:34:47,840 --> 00:34:50,960
Speaker 2: you know your husband's Like were they did they help you?

814
00:34:51,560 --> 00:34:53,680
Speaker 1: Like or did they make you feel sexy? Maybe? Did

815
00:34:53,680 --> 00:34:55,759
Speaker 1: you just come out popping babies out and just look

816
00:34:55,840 --> 00:34:57,560
Speaker 1: fine as hell, like.

817
00:35:00,080 --> 00:35:04,200
Speaker 3: The MASKIM is loose, or for me, like I only gained.

818
00:35:04,320 --> 00:35:07,000
Speaker 3: I gained eighteen pounds during pregnancy.

819
00:35:07,840 --> 00:35:11,600
Speaker 4: Damn, really, that's it, even even I even.

820
00:35:11,400 --> 00:35:12,560
Speaker 3: I gained thirty.

821
00:35:12,880 --> 00:35:15,520
Speaker 2: I ate eighteen pounds during pregnancy, lost it within like

822
00:35:15,560 --> 00:35:17,800
Speaker 2: three weeks, and then going twenty three pounds within the

823
00:35:17,840 --> 00:35:23,600
Speaker 2: first month. But after eating postpartum, I was eating non stop.

824
00:35:24,000 --> 00:35:26,399
Speaker 3: You got twenty three pounds thicker.

825
00:35:26,640 --> 00:35:29,560
Speaker 2: Twenty three pounds thicker during breastfeeding because I was eating.

826
00:35:29,320 --> 00:35:31,160
Speaker 1: Like a mad woman, you bitch.

827
00:35:33,760 --> 00:35:38,480
Speaker 4: I got skinny immediately. I lost all thirty pounds immediately

828
00:35:38,600 --> 00:35:40,520
Speaker 4: that six weeks was up, and they were like, you're

829
00:35:40,560 --> 00:35:41,480
Speaker 4: just your ninety.

830
00:35:41,239 --> 00:35:41,839
Speaker 1: Six I gain.

831
00:35:42,160 --> 00:35:45,920
Speaker 3: I lost two pounds I lost after six weeks. I

832
00:35:45,960 --> 00:35:48,239
Speaker 3: was ninety six pounds. I started ninety eight. When I

833
00:35:48,280 --> 00:35:49,760
Speaker 3: say I wanted to pick that doctor.

834
00:35:50,200 --> 00:35:52,800
Speaker 2: Oh, oh my god, my god, I remember those I

835
00:35:52,880 --> 00:35:54,200
Speaker 2: used to be that girl where I used to like

836
00:35:54,360 --> 00:35:57,520
Speaker 2: be drinking like insure and nutriment with my meals even.

837
00:35:57,400 --> 00:35:59,200
Speaker 4: Though it tastes disgusting, and then you really have to

838
00:35:59,200 --> 00:36:00,839
Speaker 4: ship because you just eating too much.

839
00:36:01,200 --> 00:36:03,120
Speaker 2: I just wanted to be thick so bad. But I'm like,

840
00:36:03,160 --> 00:36:05,879
Speaker 2: be careful what you ask for, because now let me say,

841
00:36:05,920 --> 00:36:09,960
Speaker 2: let me say that I asked, I got asked.

842
00:36:10,120 --> 00:36:14,719
Speaker 1: Damn it.

843
00:36:14,920 --> 00:36:16,640
Speaker 2: It's in areas that I want to keep it, but

844
00:36:16,640 --> 00:36:18,040
Speaker 2: there are some areas that I'd rather let it go.

845
00:36:18,360 --> 00:36:19,239
Speaker 3: But I made it what it is.

846
00:36:19,280 --> 00:36:22,759
Speaker 6: Look, you guys both look, so how did you deal

847
00:36:22,840 --> 00:36:27,120
Speaker 6: with your postpartum postpartum Like did you feel like you

848
00:36:27,160 --> 00:36:29,239
Speaker 6: had any sort of transition that had to happen with

849
00:36:29,280 --> 00:36:31,480
Speaker 6: your body or did you were you embracing your new

850
00:36:31,520 --> 00:36:32,680
Speaker 6: body or has it taken time?

851
00:36:32,680 --> 00:36:35,440
Speaker 1: Because you guys, are you know, fresh your fresheets.

852
00:36:36,080 --> 00:36:38,759
Speaker 5: It's a lot because you want to you want to

853
00:36:38,800 --> 00:36:41,520
Speaker 5: get back to the body that you thought you had,

854
00:36:41,800 --> 00:36:44,080
Speaker 5: and then you're like, but I like my body after

855
00:36:44,120 --> 00:36:46,120
Speaker 5: a baby because you're you're a lot thicker, you feel

856
00:36:46,120 --> 00:36:48,799
Speaker 5: like you have more of a woman in body. But

857
00:36:48,840 --> 00:36:50,719
Speaker 5: then you're like, oh, I need to get rid of

858
00:36:50,760 --> 00:36:53,759
Speaker 5: like my stomach or like little pockets of fat in

859
00:36:53,880 --> 00:36:54,640
Speaker 5: other places.

860
00:36:54,640 --> 00:36:55,800
Speaker 3: But they're also tired.

861
00:36:56,400 --> 00:36:59,279
Speaker 5: That part it's like to take out, like having full

862
00:36:59,320 --> 00:37:04,640
Speaker 5: time jobs, doing a podcast, running your household, having to

863
00:37:04,680 --> 00:37:06,960
Speaker 5: tend for a baby and your husband. Like there's just

864
00:37:07,000 --> 00:37:09,640
Speaker 5: like so much to juggle, and you're like, what the

865
00:37:10,320 --> 00:37:12,160
Speaker 5: Like I need to find time for myself, but like

866
00:37:12,280 --> 00:37:14,520
Speaker 5: that is also an issue like in a marriage. It's like,

867
00:37:14,560 --> 00:37:16,520
Speaker 5: can you give me a second so I can go

868
00:37:16,600 --> 00:37:18,960
Speaker 5: work it out, like work myself out, like try to

869
00:37:19,000 --> 00:37:22,120
Speaker 5: find myself and try to have time for myself. So

870
00:37:22,400 --> 00:37:25,560
Speaker 5: it's a lot to juggle, but again it's important to

871
00:37:25,840 --> 00:37:28,560
Speaker 5: find that time for yourself exactly, which is something we

872
00:37:29,080 --> 00:37:29,840
Speaker 5: like we struggle with.

873
00:37:29,880 --> 00:37:31,239
Speaker 3: I feel like we're always in a stubb with that.

874
00:37:31,280 --> 00:37:32,840
Speaker 2: I mean, I think we're both very fortunate when we

875
00:37:32,880 --> 00:37:35,560
Speaker 2: have really supportive partners. Like my husband prefers me thick,

876
00:37:35,680 --> 00:37:37,640
Speaker 2: so he's like, have another one because like shit, like

877
00:37:37,640 --> 00:37:40,000
Speaker 2: the thick of the better, And I was like, Mila,

878
00:37:40,200 --> 00:37:44,040
Speaker 2: I was like legitimately, up until I was what thirty

879
00:37:44,080 --> 00:37:46,880
Speaker 2: one thirty, I was like one hundred and ten pounds,

880
00:37:47,160 --> 00:37:49,279
Speaker 2: so like I've always been really tiny. So like this

881
00:37:49,400 --> 00:37:51,719
Speaker 2: new body, he's like, okay, so he's not mad in

882
00:37:51,760 --> 00:37:54,680
Speaker 2: the least. I think it was me because I think

883
00:37:54,840 --> 00:37:56,960
Speaker 2: the problem was I didn't have the money for this

884
00:37:57,000 --> 00:37:57,440
Speaker 2: new body.

885
00:37:57,480 --> 00:37:59,280
Speaker 3: I'm like, but what about all these clothes.

886
00:37:58,960 --> 00:37:59,040
Speaker 5: Like.

887
00:38:01,040 --> 00:38:04,040
Speaker 3: You're replacing this ship. Yeah, with my head.

888
00:38:04,120 --> 00:38:05,680
Speaker 2: This new body doesn't come with like a check. This

889
00:38:05,760 --> 00:38:08,399
Speaker 2: will stimulus steck with this new body. Oh my god, right,

890
00:38:08,480 --> 00:38:09,920
Speaker 2: oh my god, Long Keith, it needs to be a

891
00:38:09,920 --> 00:38:14,560
Speaker 2: stimulus check for the post post part of body. The

892
00:38:14,600 --> 00:38:17,400
Speaker 2: fact but that was the hardest piece for me is

893
00:38:17,480 --> 00:38:19,160
Speaker 2: I can't fit into anything, and not being able to

894
00:38:19,160 --> 00:38:21,200
Speaker 2: fit and things made me sad. It wasn't that my

895
00:38:21,200 --> 00:38:23,040
Speaker 2: body made me sad. I couldn't fit into the things

896
00:38:23,080 --> 00:38:26,200
Speaker 2: that I wanted to wear. Right, just again, you know,

897
00:38:26,360 --> 00:38:28,480
Speaker 2: just learning that it's all good and just being comfortable

898
00:38:28,480 --> 00:38:30,279
Speaker 2: in who I am and kind of celebrating like the

899
00:38:30,320 --> 00:38:30,840
Speaker 2: new body.

900
00:38:31,880 --> 00:38:34,000
Speaker 3: It's a time, but I'm sticking in there.

901
00:38:35,800 --> 00:38:38,080
Speaker 2: Okay, we have this one last question and this is

902
00:38:38,120 --> 00:38:41,799
Speaker 2: a new segment where we're doing and basically it's called

903
00:38:41,800 --> 00:38:44,800
Speaker 2: Bad Choices. So you know our podcasts Good Mom's Bad Choices,

904
00:38:44,960 --> 00:38:47,640
Speaker 2: And when we named it bad Choices, it was really

905
00:38:47,640 --> 00:38:49,319
Speaker 2: a play on word because I think a lot of

906
00:38:49,360 --> 00:38:52,840
Speaker 2: times people can think would think that, you know, because

907
00:38:52,880 --> 00:38:55,760
Speaker 2: we smoke weed or you know, we talk about taking

908
00:38:55,800 --> 00:38:57,799
Speaker 2: time away from your kids so that you can, you know,

909
00:38:58,000 --> 00:38:59,719
Speaker 2: be a good good to yourself so in.

910
00:38:59,680 --> 00:39:01,120
Speaker 1: Turn you be a good mom.

911
00:39:02,000 --> 00:39:05,520
Speaker 2: Would be a bad choice, right, So I wanted to

912
00:39:05,520 --> 00:39:08,680
Speaker 2: ask you, guys, is there anything in your life recently

913
00:39:09,120 --> 00:39:12,239
Speaker 2: or anything in motherhood. It could be personally, it could

914
00:39:12,239 --> 00:39:14,359
Speaker 2: be a motherhood or just in life in general, that

915
00:39:14,760 --> 00:39:17,760
Speaker 2: maybe what is it? A bad was a bad choice

916
00:39:17,760 --> 00:39:21,359
Speaker 2: that ended up being being good in the long run.

917
00:39:22,600 --> 00:39:26,200
Speaker 5: I think my bad choice, I wouldn't consider it a

918
00:39:26,200 --> 00:39:26,760
Speaker 5: bad choice.

919
00:39:26,800 --> 00:39:28,680
Speaker 3: This is gonna sound terrible when I say it, but

920
00:39:29,200 --> 00:39:31,440
Speaker 3: having a kid.

921
00:39:31,640 --> 00:39:35,520
Speaker 5: Was something I wanted to do, but I didn't want to.

922
00:39:35,480 --> 00:39:36,120
Speaker 1: Do it right away.

923
00:39:36,200 --> 00:39:38,239
Speaker 5: Oh my god, I have the same one, and me

924
00:39:38,239 --> 00:39:40,920
Speaker 5: and my husband talked about it, but we were like, okay,

925
00:39:40,960 --> 00:39:43,440
Speaker 5: we're on vacation. When we talked about it, We're like, oh,

926
00:39:43,560 --> 00:39:46,040
Speaker 5: let's start. Let's start trying for a kid when we

927
00:39:46,040 --> 00:39:46,600
Speaker 5: get home.

928
00:39:47,200 --> 00:39:49,520
Speaker 3: But like, obviously we're on a vacation, we're having a

929
00:39:49,560 --> 00:39:50,040
Speaker 3: good time.

930
00:39:50,200 --> 00:39:53,239
Speaker 1: We just you know, did you get pregnant vacation like

931
00:39:53,280 --> 00:39:53,600
Speaker 1: me too?

932
00:39:54,080 --> 00:39:54,799
Speaker 3: I think I did.

933
00:39:55,080 --> 00:39:55,120
Speaker 4: No.

934
00:39:55,600 --> 00:40:01,560
Speaker 1: Girl, you had the nony juice to girl, the malie.

935
00:40:03,960 --> 00:40:07,400
Speaker 5: But you know, having a daughter was probably the best

936
00:40:07,400 --> 00:40:10,759
Speaker 5: thing that ever happened to me, and not necessarily like

937
00:40:11,560 --> 00:40:14,200
Speaker 5: her or herself was the greatest thing that happened to me.

938
00:40:14,320 --> 00:40:19,840
Speaker 5: But the transformation of me after having her was the

939
00:40:19,880 --> 00:40:25,719
Speaker 5: best possible outcome in my journey to myself. So I

940
00:40:25,760 --> 00:40:27,480
Speaker 5: don't regret having.

941
00:40:27,160 --> 00:40:28,120
Speaker 3: A baby this suit.

942
00:40:28,400 --> 00:40:30,600
Speaker 5: You know, people say it's late because you know I'm

943
00:40:30,840 --> 00:40:35,000
Speaker 5: past thirty, but honestly, I'm glad I waited and I'm

944
00:40:35,000 --> 00:40:36,359
Speaker 5: glad it happened when it did.

945
00:40:37,280 --> 00:40:39,400
Speaker 3: So I had something.

946
00:40:39,280 --> 00:40:41,000
Speaker 2: Similar in that, like my husband and I weren't ready

947
00:40:41,040 --> 00:40:42,840
Speaker 2: to have a kid when we did because he wasn't working,

948
00:40:43,200 --> 00:40:45,560
Speaker 2: so he was moved. He moved from Alberta, which is

949
00:40:45,640 --> 00:40:48,560
Speaker 2: another province in Lantiera in Canada, and he wasn't working

950
00:40:48,600 --> 00:40:50,440
Speaker 2: at the time. So like, obviously the timing to have

951
00:40:50,680 --> 00:40:53,000
Speaker 2: the kid wasn't the best choice, but it worked out

952
00:40:53,040 --> 00:40:55,040
Speaker 2: to be a blessing. But the other thing that I

953
00:40:55,040 --> 00:40:56,440
Speaker 2: was going to say is that, like, I guess, one

954
00:40:56,480 --> 00:40:58,439
Speaker 2: of the things that I wrestled with a lot once

955
00:40:58,480 --> 00:41:00,480
Speaker 2: I became a mom was like, how could I still

956
00:41:00,480 --> 00:41:02,760
Speaker 2: maintain my sexy, Like I still like love to club,

957
00:41:02,880 --> 00:41:03,879
Speaker 2: but I don't want it to go out.

958
00:41:04,040 --> 00:41:05,080
Speaker 3: I don't like to drink, and I.

959
00:41:05,040 --> 00:41:07,239
Speaker 2: Like to wear crop tops and I curse and I'm

960
00:41:07,280 --> 00:41:09,600
Speaker 2: worried about like how could I be that person? And

961
00:41:09,600 --> 00:41:12,160
Speaker 2: still be a mom because what I thought motherhood was

962
00:41:12,160 --> 00:41:13,719
Speaker 2: was the complete antithesis of that.

963
00:41:14,160 --> 00:41:15,279
Speaker 3: I'm like gonna worry.

964
00:41:16,040 --> 00:41:18,960
Speaker 2: But I think that like in owning that, I feel

965
00:41:18,960 --> 00:41:20,920
Speaker 2: like I'm not only like a good mom for me,

966
00:41:21,080 --> 00:41:23,800
Speaker 2: but I also you know, now, especially with building this community,

967
00:41:23,800 --> 00:41:26,719
Speaker 2: I'm realizing that like other moms are like, oh, thank god.

968
00:41:26,960 --> 00:41:29,200
Speaker 3: You know what I mean, so like bigh of relief.

969
00:41:29,239 --> 00:41:30,239
Speaker 3: And I think that that's so dope.

970
00:41:30,280 --> 00:41:32,440
Speaker 2: And I think especially because for Shan and I, like,

971
00:41:32,719 --> 00:41:35,320
Speaker 2: you know, we love your podcast, it's amazing, But you're American.

972
00:41:35,480 --> 00:41:37,280
Speaker 3: There aren't a lot of like young Black.

973
00:41:37,080 --> 00:41:39,600
Speaker 2: Canadian moms who are like shooting the shit and being

974
00:41:39,640 --> 00:41:42,359
Speaker 2: honest about like being mother is the way that we are,

975
00:41:42,719 --> 00:41:45,880
Speaker 2: especially coming from Caribbean backgrounds that tend to be rigid

976
00:41:45,920 --> 00:41:48,279
Speaker 2: and tend to be stricter. I'm not saying like no,

977
00:41:48,480 --> 00:41:50,360
Speaker 2: like we're gonna do motherhood our way. We're gonna, like,

978
00:41:50,400 --> 00:41:52,279
Speaker 2: you know, let it be what it is. And I

979
00:41:52,320 --> 00:41:56,279
Speaker 2: think that finding like that voice and giving myself that

980
00:41:56,320 --> 00:41:58,560
Speaker 2: freedom has been so freeing for us and for so

981
00:41:58,640 --> 00:42:02,320
Speaker 2: many other people. So I'm happy with just a person

982
00:42:02,360 --> 00:42:03,719
Speaker 2: that I've become because I'm a mom.

983
00:42:03,800 --> 00:42:05,080
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's so dope.

984
00:42:05,280 --> 00:42:05,960
Speaker 3: Amen to that.

985
00:42:06,120 --> 00:42:08,279
Speaker 1: Yes, you know, you know we're on board with all

986
00:42:08,320 --> 00:42:12,160
Speaker 1: of that. Good moms make bad choices night.

987
00:42:15,000 --> 00:42:17,560
Speaker 2: Okay, ladies, Well, thank you guys so much for coming

988
00:42:17,600 --> 00:42:19,359
Speaker 2: on you guys, make sure you go check out while

989
00:42:19,400 --> 00:42:21,759
Speaker 2: they're not podcast. Can you let them know also where

990
00:42:21,760 --> 00:42:23,800
Speaker 2: they can find you on social and anything else you

991
00:42:23,840 --> 00:42:26,040
Speaker 2: want to plug that you have going on or do

992
00:42:26,080 --> 00:42:28,880
Speaker 2: you want to shareh.

993
00:42:29,080 --> 00:42:32,880
Speaker 5: Well, you can find us on Instagram at WTM podcast

994
00:42:33,920 --> 00:42:36,920
Speaker 5: look out for merch coming soon, Black Moms Matters.

995
00:42:38,160 --> 00:42:40,399
Speaker 1: I love that shirt and that was that one day

996
00:42:41,360 --> 00:42:42,799
Speaker 1: mom oh by mom.

997
00:42:42,880 --> 00:42:46,520
Speaker 5: Hey yeah, so you can find that on our Instagram pages.

998
00:42:46,600 --> 00:42:48,960
Speaker 5: It will be launching really really soon, so just check

999
00:42:49,040 --> 00:42:49,640
Speaker 5: us out on there.

1000
00:42:50,040 --> 00:42:50,840
Speaker 1: Dope, dope.

1001
00:42:50,920 --> 00:42:53,480
Speaker 3: Thank you guys so much, so happy we got to connect.

1002
00:42:53,880 --> 00:42:56,440
Speaker 2: Thank you for having us. And I mean we have

1003
00:42:56,440 --> 00:42:59,240
Speaker 2: good friends in La, so yeah.

1004
00:42:58,080 --> 00:43:03,359
Speaker 1: Come on. I'm actually I might need to come out there.

1005
00:43:03,360 --> 00:43:05,280
Speaker 1: I might need to kind a Canadian boyfriend.

1006
00:43:05,280 --> 00:43:07,200
Speaker 2: I know, I got a nigga, but like he'll understand,

1007
00:43:08,760 --> 00:43:10,160
Speaker 2: we have an adult citizenship.

1008
00:43:11,000 --> 00:43:12,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, Lissa, you know we're Jamaica.

1009
00:43:14,239 --> 00:43:14,359
Speaker 2: Men.

1010
00:43:15,080 --> 00:43:17,719
Speaker 4: I need Jamaican men listening from while they nap podcast

1011
00:43:17,920 --> 00:43:20,480
Speaker 4: Call Eric and I'm I'm part Jamaican.

1012
00:43:20,560 --> 00:43:22,879
Speaker 1: I just found out and my daughter was conceived there,

1013
00:43:22,960 --> 00:43:27,800
Speaker 1: so technically it's all in the family for something.

1014
00:43:29,080 --> 00:43:30,960
Speaker 4: Well, you guys know where to find us. We're at

1015
00:43:31,000 --> 00:43:34,160
Speaker 4: Good Mom's Underscore Bad Choices. You can sign up for

1016
00:43:34,160 --> 00:43:36,560
Speaker 4: a newsletter at good Momsbad Choices dot com and of

1017
00:43:36,600 --> 00:43:40,799
Speaker 4: course subscribe to our Patreon for more extra episodes. You

1018
00:43:40,920 --> 00:43:44,000
Speaker 4: have to type into the search bar Patreon dot com

1019
00:43:44,040 --> 00:43:48,200
Speaker 4: backslash Good Mom's Bad Choices because we're explicit, and we

1020
00:43:48,280 --> 00:43:53,120
Speaker 4: have ilicit content and even more explicit content on Patreon,

1021
00:43:53,600 --> 00:43:56,920
Speaker 4: So check us out. And if you love us, if

1022
00:43:56,920 --> 00:43:59,680
Speaker 4: you've listened to this entire, entire podcast, even if you

1023
00:43:59,719 --> 00:44:03,560
Speaker 4: think we're boneheads, please leave and rate us and review

1024
00:44:03,640 --> 00:44:06,000
Speaker 4: us and comment it matters, Yes, please on.

1025
00:44:06,239 --> 00:44:10,320
Speaker 2: Apple podcast go all the way to the bottom. All right, ladies,

1026
00:44:10,400 --> 00:44:13,840
Speaker 2: Well you guys, enjoy your the rest of your day

1027
00:44:14,360 --> 00:44:37,600
Speaker 2: and we'll catch you by bye bye.

1028
00:44:28,040 --> 00:44:33,680
Speaker 1: E solo recorder Lalos. Then let's just say us

1029
00:44:35,480 --> 00:44:35,640
Speaker 6: Ran