1
00:00:00,560 --> 00:00:03,680
Speaker 1: Time now for today's Strawberry Letter and listen. If you

2
00:00:03,880 --> 00:00:08,000
Speaker 1: need advice and relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting, and more,

3
00:00:08,320 --> 00:00:12,280
Speaker 1: please submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM dot com

4
00:00:12,320 --> 00:00:15,520
Speaker 1: and click submit Strawberry Letter. It's just that simple. We

5
00:00:15,600 --> 00:00:18,759
Speaker 1: could be reading your letter alive on the air, just

6
00:00:18,920 --> 00:00:21,919
Speaker 1: like we're gonna read this one right here, right now. Yes, Steve,

7
00:00:22,000 --> 00:00:24,239
Speaker 1: can I tell you something about your speech last night?

8
00:00:25,200 --> 00:00:28,960
Speaker 1: Donald Trump? Head more black people stand up in that

9
00:00:29,200 --> 00:00:33,040
Speaker 1: crowd that has ever been to his house, Polder, and

10
00:00:33,159 --> 00:00:35,280
Speaker 1: he don't know none of them. Black. Don't try to

11
00:00:35,320 --> 00:00:40,400
Speaker 1: trick us. Okay, We're way smarter than that. Buggle up,

12
00:00:40,520 --> 00:00:42,360
Speaker 1: Hold on tight, We got it for you. Here it

13
00:00:42,400 --> 00:00:46,360
Speaker 1: is Strawberry letter. Thank you, nephew. Subject Should I just

14
00:00:46,479 --> 00:00:49,360
Speaker 1: hush and stay on the main line? To Stephen Shirley,

15
00:00:49,600 --> 00:00:53,159
Speaker 1: I've been married for eleven years to a very religious man.

16
00:00:53,479 --> 00:00:57,320
Speaker 1: When I say my husband loves the Lord, he loves

17
00:00:57,480 --> 00:01:00,240
Speaker 1: the Lord. He is five years older than me, and

18
00:01:00,280 --> 00:01:04,240
Speaker 1: he dedicated his life to Christ three years before meeting me.

19
00:01:04,600 --> 00:01:06,960
Speaker 1: He said it was a Lord that led him to me.

20
00:01:07,480 --> 00:01:10,640
Speaker 1: Because of him, I got saved and really got into

21
00:01:10,640 --> 00:01:14,039
Speaker 1: the church. I am a faithful Christian, but I can't

22
00:01:14,120 --> 00:01:18,040
Speaker 1: quote scriptures like he can. I am constantly reminded that

23
00:01:18,040 --> 00:01:20,880
Speaker 1: he's more familiar with religion than I am, and he

24
00:01:20,959 --> 00:01:23,479
Speaker 1: likes to tell me that he has a much better

25
00:01:23,520 --> 00:01:27,400
Speaker 1: relationship with Jesus than I do. If he's angry with me,

26
00:01:27,640 --> 00:01:30,600
Speaker 1: he says terrible things like God is not pleased with

27
00:01:30,640 --> 00:01:33,280
Speaker 1: how I conduct myself as a wife, and I don't

28
00:01:33,360 --> 00:01:36,120
Speaker 1: carry myself as a woman of God would. If I

29
00:01:36,160 --> 00:01:38,800
Speaker 1: ask him what I'm doing wrong, he shuts me down

30
00:01:38,840 --> 00:01:41,559
Speaker 1: and tells me to go talk to Jesus. I asked

31
00:01:41,640 --> 00:01:45,360
Speaker 1: him to stop saying mean things to me whenever he's upset,

32
00:01:45,400 --> 00:01:48,160
Speaker 1: and his response is always, you can take it up

33
00:01:48,160 --> 00:01:50,760
Speaker 1: with Jesus. I used to love the fact that my

34
00:01:50,840 --> 00:01:53,880
Speaker 1: husband is such a godly man, but lately I am

35
00:01:53,920 --> 00:01:56,840
Speaker 1: starting to resent him, and he's making me not want

36
00:01:56,880 --> 00:02:00,000
Speaker 1: to even go to church anymore. We have the same

37
00:02:00,160 --> 00:02:03,400
Speaker 1: problems that all married couples have, but I can't work

38
00:02:03,440 --> 00:02:05,880
Speaker 1: through any of our problems or talk to him about

39
00:02:05,920 --> 00:02:09,440
Speaker 1: anything because he tells me to go talk to Jesus

40
00:02:09,480 --> 00:02:13,200
Speaker 1: instead of him. My breaking point came last Friday, when

41
00:02:13,200 --> 00:02:15,760
Speaker 1: I tried to talk to him about a conflict I

42
00:02:15,800 --> 00:02:18,200
Speaker 1: had at work, and he told me that if I

43
00:02:18,280 --> 00:02:22,160
Speaker 1: prayed more and talked less, even everything in my life

44
00:02:22,240 --> 00:02:25,200
Speaker 1: would be just fine. We have reached the point where

45
00:02:25,240 --> 00:02:29,119
Speaker 1: religion is going to destroy our marriage. I've researched how

46
00:02:29,160 --> 00:02:34,120
Speaker 1: people being how people can be too holy, and my

47
00:02:34,200 --> 00:02:37,720
Speaker 1: husband is one of those people. I can't continue living

48
00:02:37,760 --> 00:02:40,440
Speaker 1: like this. I need your advice. Should I talk to

49
00:02:40,520 --> 00:02:42,800
Speaker 1: him and get counseling or should I keep my mouth

50
00:02:42,840 --> 00:02:46,800
Speaker 1: shut and stay on the main line. Well, I just

51
00:02:46,840 --> 00:02:49,600
Speaker 1: got to tell you this. First of all, religion is

52
00:02:49,639 --> 00:02:52,880
Speaker 1: not destroying your marriage. It's not going to destroy your marriage.

53
00:02:52,919 --> 00:02:56,120
Speaker 1: I think it's your crazy, self righteous, holier than thou husband,

54
00:02:56,400 --> 00:03:01,200
Speaker 1: that's who's going to destroy your marriage. I mean, he's

55
00:03:01,360 --> 00:03:04,079
Speaker 1: he's he is right about one thing. You should take

56
00:03:04,080 --> 00:03:07,320
Speaker 1: it up with Jesus because only Jesus can fix him,

57
00:03:07,639 --> 00:03:10,560
Speaker 1: all right, because you certainly can't right now. And by

58
00:03:10,600 --> 00:03:14,880
Speaker 1: the way, I'm sure you know this, but the way

59
00:03:14,880 --> 00:03:17,880
Speaker 1: he acts towards you his wife is very ungodly, is

60
00:03:18,000 --> 00:03:23,080
Speaker 1: very unjudgment it's very judgmental, it's very disrespectful. If the Lord,

61
00:03:23,320 --> 00:03:26,520
Speaker 1: like he says, truly led him to you, don't you

62
00:03:26,639 --> 00:03:30,640
Speaker 1: think the Lord would have also, you know, shown him,

63
00:03:30,680 --> 00:03:33,600
Speaker 1: shown him how to treat you, you know, and all

64
00:03:33,600 --> 00:03:36,040
Speaker 1: of those things. I gotta tell you there are a

65
00:03:36,160 --> 00:03:39,880
Speaker 1: lot of non Christian men who don't even know the Lord,

66
00:03:39,960 --> 00:03:44,160
Speaker 1: non religious men who treat their wives like Queen's way

67
00:03:44,200 --> 00:03:47,760
Speaker 1: better than he treats you. And you're right married couples

68
00:03:47,840 --> 00:03:52,120
Speaker 1: Christian whoever, they have issues and they need to be

69
00:03:52,160 --> 00:03:55,800
Speaker 1: discussed and work through. Uh. He's stubborn, like I said,

70
00:03:55,800 --> 00:03:59,240
Speaker 1: he's disrespectful, he's closed minded, he has an attitude when

71
00:03:59,280 --> 00:04:01,040
Speaker 1: it comes to you. He doesn't want to talk to

72
00:04:01,080 --> 00:04:04,880
Speaker 1: you his wife. He's not a Christian that he claims

73
00:04:04,880 --> 00:04:08,080
Speaker 1: to be. Just and just because a person can quote scripture,

74
00:04:08,400 --> 00:04:11,360
Speaker 1: that doesn't make him God's favorite little Christian man. That

75
00:04:11,920 --> 00:04:14,520
Speaker 1: just doesn't do it. I mean, yeah, I mean to

76
00:04:14,600 --> 00:04:16,479
Speaker 1: save your marriage, of course, I would try to talk

77
00:04:16,480 --> 00:04:19,960
Speaker 1: to him. I would do it lovingly, respectfully, and I

78
00:04:19,960 --> 00:04:23,000
Speaker 1: would also seek some sort of marriage counseling in this situation.

79
00:04:23,120 --> 00:04:25,800
Speaker 1: See if they offer it at your church. Even though

80
00:04:25,800 --> 00:04:28,000
Speaker 1: you said you're feeling like you don't want to go anymore,

81
00:04:28,360 --> 00:04:32,240
Speaker 1: but something has to be done. You know, I must

82
00:04:32,240 --> 00:04:35,320
Speaker 1: warn you your husband, mister perfect, he's probably not gonna

83
00:04:35,360 --> 00:04:37,640
Speaker 1: want to do any marriage counseling. He's probably gonna say,

84
00:04:37,680 --> 00:04:40,159
Speaker 1: take it up with Jesus. I just think you should

85
00:04:40,200 --> 00:04:44,200
Speaker 1: go take it up with a marriage counselor at your church. Steve,

86
00:04:45,279 --> 00:04:48,920
Speaker 1: should I just hush and stay on the main line. No,

87
00:04:49,200 --> 00:04:54,880
Speaker 1: you shouldn't, because you in some mess. Been married eleven years.

88
00:04:54,960 --> 00:04:57,760
Speaker 1: Very religious man. When I say my husband loves a Lord,

89
00:04:57,760 --> 00:05:00,719
Speaker 1: he loves a Lord. He's five years is older than me,

90
00:05:00,800 --> 00:05:03,479
Speaker 1: and he dedicated his life to Christ three years before

91
00:05:03,560 --> 00:05:06,479
Speaker 1: meeting me. He said it was a Lord that led

92
00:05:06,480 --> 00:05:08,479
Speaker 1: me to him. Because of him, I got saved and

93
00:05:08,560 --> 00:05:11,880
Speaker 1: really got into the church. Here's a problem with your husband.

94
00:05:12,279 --> 00:05:15,719
Speaker 1: And he loves the Lord so much that he now

95
00:05:15,839 --> 00:05:18,440
Speaker 1: has fixed it in his mind and is trying to

96
00:05:18,480 --> 00:05:21,679
Speaker 1: convince everybody that he loves the Lord more than anybody else.

97
00:05:22,920 --> 00:05:25,720
Speaker 1: And in order to love the Lord more than anybody else,

98
00:05:25,800 --> 00:05:28,599
Speaker 1: you must not love some other people, which is what

99
00:05:28,680 --> 00:05:34,680
Speaker 1: he is doing. Which is what he is doing, this

100
00:05:34,720 --> 00:05:38,640
Speaker 1: man right here. Because of him, you went to church

101
00:05:38,640 --> 00:05:42,240
Speaker 1: and you got saved. But I can't quote scriptures like

102
00:05:42,400 --> 00:05:46,360
Speaker 1: he can. You don't have to. He ain't living by him.

103
00:05:47,240 --> 00:05:51,280
Speaker 1: He just quoting them. I'm constantly reminded that he's more

104
00:05:51,680 --> 00:05:54,520
Speaker 1: familiar with religion than I am, and he likes to

105
00:05:54,520 --> 00:05:57,200
Speaker 1: tell me that he got a much better relationship with

106
00:05:57,320 --> 00:06:01,160
Speaker 1: Jesus than I do. How does he know that? How

107
00:06:01,200 --> 00:06:03,239
Speaker 1: does he know that? And you know what my father

108
00:06:03,320 --> 00:06:06,240
Speaker 1: always told me, if somebody always got to tell you

109
00:06:06,279 --> 00:06:10,440
Speaker 1: who they are and what they do, it probably ain't true.

110
00:06:11,720 --> 00:06:15,800
Speaker 1: It probably ain't true. This wonderful relationship be talking about

111
00:06:15,839 --> 00:06:19,680
Speaker 1: with God, but it keeps doing ungodlys stuff when he's

112
00:06:19,720 --> 00:06:22,240
Speaker 1: angry with me, says terrible things like God is not

113
00:06:22,320 --> 00:06:24,880
Speaker 1: pleased with how I conduct myself as while as a wife.

114
00:06:25,160 --> 00:06:28,960
Speaker 1: What he might God might not be real happy with

115
00:06:29,040 --> 00:06:32,719
Speaker 1: your duties as a husband either. You don't seem like

116
00:06:32,760 --> 00:06:36,920
Speaker 1: you popping that on all corks, chump, Hold on, Steve,

117
00:06:38,000 --> 00:06:42,720
Speaker 1: won't call him something else with you know boy? Yeah?

118
00:06:42,839 --> 00:06:46,839
Speaker 1: Part two of Steve's response coming up. Today's subject. Should

119
00:06:46,839 --> 00:06:49,839
Speaker 1: I just hush and stay on the main line? We'll

120
00:06:49,839 --> 00:06:55,839
Speaker 1: get back into it right after this. You're listening, all right, Steve?

121
00:06:55,839 --> 00:06:58,400
Speaker 1: Come on, let's recap today's strawberry letter? Or should I

122
00:06:58,440 --> 00:07:02,160
Speaker 1: just hush and stay on the main line? No, you

123
00:07:02,200 --> 00:07:07,480
Speaker 1: shouldn't because you're married to this food. Now he's bigger

124
00:07:07,560 --> 00:07:12,360
Speaker 1: Christian than everybody I know. People like that he got

125
00:07:12,400 --> 00:07:14,600
Speaker 1: you into the church and everything. But now he did

126
00:07:14,760 --> 00:07:17,600
Speaker 1: talk to you. He more familiar with the religion than

127
00:07:17,600 --> 00:07:19,560
Speaker 1: you all. He likes to tell me that he got

128
00:07:19,560 --> 00:07:23,440
Speaker 1: a much better relationship with Jesus than I do. How

129
00:07:23,480 --> 00:07:28,720
Speaker 1: does he know that? He just took credit for it?

130
00:07:29,480 --> 00:07:32,960
Speaker 1: Once again the words of Smith Harvey. If somebody always

131
00:07:33,000 --> 00:07:34,880
Speaker 1: got to tell you who they are and what they do,

132
00:07:35,160 --> 00:07:39,520
Speaker 1: it probably ain't true. And I have found that in

133
00:07:39,600 --> 00:07:44,160
Speaker 1: my life. All the time he's angry, he says terrible

134
00:07:44,240 --> 00:07:47,840
Speaker 1: things to you, like God is not pleased with how

135
00:07:47,880 --> 00:07:51,080
Speaker 1: I conduct myself as a wife, and I don't care

136
00:07:51,200 --> 00:07:54,560
Speaker 1: myself as a woman of God. Then when I ask

137
00:07:54,640 --> 00:07:56,640
Speaker 1: you what I'm doing wrong, he shut me down, tell

138
00:07:56,720 --> 00:08:02,320
Speaker 1: me talk to Jesus. I'm asking you one more time.

139
00:08:02,680 --> 00:08:06,160
Speaker 1: I love that he shuts me down and tells me

140
00:08:06,200 --> 00:08:10,440
Speaker 1: to go talk to Jesus. I'm asking you because Jesus

141
00:08:10,440 --> 00:08:12,760
Speaker 1: ain't told me to shut him sitting down nowhere? What

142
00:08:13,000 --> 00:08:15,000
Speaker 1: am I doing wrong? Because jess Ain't said I was

143
00:08:15,040 --> 00:08:19,840
Speaker 1: doing nothing wrong. I've asked him to stop saying mean

144
00:08:19,960 --> 00:08:22,880
Speaker 1: things to me whenever he's upsetting. His response is you

145
00:08:22,880 --> 00:08:26,400
Speaker 1: can take it up with Jesus. I took it up

146
00:08:26,440 --> 00:08:28,240
Speaker 1: with Jesus. He told me to tell you you're going

147
00:08:28,320 --> 00:08:38,520
Speaker 1: to hell. How about that? Yeah, mister Holy Moses, Holy Moses,

148
00:08:38,840 --> 00:08:41,040
Speaker 1: you got to start telling him stuff that he know

149
00:08:41,120 --> 00:08:44,160
Speaker 1: ain't true. You ain't all that, You ain't the wife

150
00:08:44,160 --> 00:08:46,439
Speaker 1: you're supposed to be, and you ain't you ain't Moses.

151
00:08:48,880 --> 00:08:55,040
Speaker 1: You can take it up with Jesus. What Lazarus start

152
00:08:55,160 --> 00:08:57,440
Speaker 1: saying stuff to you? Can? You're just thrown a little

153
00:08:57,480 --> 00:08:59,200
Speaker 1: bit of the Bible at him, that you do know.

154
00:09:00,720 --> 00:09:03,280
Speaker 1: I'm starting to resent him, and he's making me not

155
00:09:03,400 --> 00:09:05,720
Speaker 1: want to even go to church no more. You know

156
00:09:05,760 --> 00:09:07,400
Speaker 1: why you don't want to go to church no more?

157
00:09:07,480 --> 00:09:11,120
Speaker 1: Because that ain't what church supposed to be. See, that's

158
00:09:11,120 --> 00:09:13,480
Speaker 1: why you don't like a church supposed to churches for

159
00:09:13,520 --> 00:09:16,320
Speaker 1: six people, sick people. That's why he died there, because

160
00:09:16,360 --> 00:09:26,000
Speaker 1: he's sick. Yeah, sitting up in him. We got the

161
00:09:26,040 --> 00:09:28,400
Speaker 1: same couple that all man. We got the same problems

162
00:09:28,480 --> 00:09:31,120
Speaker 1: all man couples have. But I can't work through any

163
00:09:31,120 --> 00:09:34,040
Speaker 1: of our problems because when I try to talk to

164
00:09:34,080 --> 00:09:36,840
Speaker 1: him about anything. He telled me to talk to Jesus

165
00:09:36,840 --> 00:09:43,480
Speaker 1: instead of him. I didn't imagine Jesus. I married you, Yeah, loved,

166
00:09:45,000 --> 00:09:48,080
Speaker 1: that's the same vile leave all others in cleve only

167
00:09:48,080 --> 00:09:50,800
Speaker 1: outer him. But that time I come you. You're telling

168
00:09:50,840 --> 00:09:53,000
Speaker 1: me to talk to Jesus. I want to talk to

169
00:09:53,120 --> 00:10:03,200
Speaker 1: my husband, Joe black ass sitting up in here reading

170
00:10:03,200 --> 00:10:05,680
Speaker 1: the Bible every day. You ain't in the bad and

171
00:10:05,800 --> 00:10:08,120
Speaker 1: you ain't doing nothing in the bad room. Since we're

172
00:10:08,120 --> 00:10:14,480
Speaker 1: bringing it up, how about that? How about that, mister

173
00:10:14,679 --> 00:10:19,320
Speaker 1: fat stomach man sitting up in here, take it up

174
00:10:19,360 --> 00:10:24,160
Speaker 1: with Jesus. Eleven years of marriage. My breaking point came

175
00:10:24,240 --> 00:10:26,160
Speaker 1: last Friday when I tried to talk to him about

176
00:10:26,160 --> 00:10:28,200
Speaker 1: the conflict I had to work. He told me, if

177
00:10:28,200 --> 00:10:30,960
Speaker 1: I prayed more and talk less, everything in my life

178
00:10:30,960 --> 00:10:35,040
Speaker 1: would be fine. If I had another husband, my life

179
00:10:35,080 --> 00:10:39,640
Speaker 1: would be fine. I'm trying to talk to your fat ass.

180
00:10:42,880 --> 00:10:46,520
Speaker 1: I've researched how people can be too holy, You fat

181
00:10:46,600 --> 00:10:49,439
Speaker 1: holy roll up, you're doing that. My husband is one

182
00:10:49,440 --> 00:10:53,120
Speaker 1: of these people. I can't continue living like this up

183
00:10:53,160 --> 00:10:55,080
Speaker 1: in here, listening to all this mess, and he ain't

184
00:10:55,120 --> 00:10:57,720
Speaker 1: doing nothing to make me want to stay. Ain't frying

185
00:10:57,720 --> 00:11:00,400
Speaker 1: the chicken and baking in the bedroom. Ain't doing nothing.

186
00:11:00,800 --> 00:11:03,400
Speaker 1: We're sitting up and here reading scriptures. Did we fall asleep?

187
00:11:03,679 --> 00:11:06,360
Speaker 1: I want to fall asleep. I want to get asleep.

188
00:11:12,200 --> 00:11:15,040
Speaker 1: You gotta start snapping back at him. Should I try

189
00:11:15,080 --> 00:11:17,560
Speaker 1: to talk to him and get counseling or should I

190
00:11:17,600 --> 00:11:19,880
Speaker 1: just keep my mouth shut and stay on the main line.

191
00:11:20,760 --> 00:11:22,920
Speaker 1: You know what this dude reminds me because I know

192
00:11:23,000 --> 00:11:26,400
Speaker 1: people like this holier than thy? Yeah you haven't. You

193
00:11:26,480 --> 00:11:32,440
Speaker 1: know some people that are so saved that they ain't saved? Yeah?

194
00:11:33,320 --> 00:11:35,600
Speaker 1: I mean, man, you know somebody, man, every time you

195
00:11:35,720 --> 00:11:38,760
Speaker 1: talk to you know, these people you call their house,

196
00:11:39,880 --> 00:11:45,000
Speaker 1: they still got answering machines. They got all of the

197
00:11:45,080 --> 00:11:48,480
Speaker 1: Book of Corinthians on their answering machine. Don't nobody even

198
00:11:48,559 --> 00:11:54,520
Speaker 1: read Corinthians. No nobody ever say you ever read First

199
00:11:54,520 --> 00:11:57,440
Speaker 1: Corinthian because you don't. Nobody read first Carincia, Second Rinthia.

200
00:11:58,400 --> 00:12:01,199
Speaker 1: No nobody do that. They always got that on it.

201
00:12:02,640 --> 00:12:05,599
Speaker 1: I can't stand on people. How you doing? Blessed and

202
00:12:05,760 --> 00:12:09,559
Speaker 1: highly favored? Yeah, I saw your car down on a

203
00:12:09,720 --> 00:12:14,679
Speaker 1: thirty who was up on block exactly? I guess the

204
00:12:14,800 --> 00:12:22,760
Speaker 1: blessed ran out on your car all the time. Lover

205
00:12:22,920 --> 00:12:26,640
Speaker 1: like Christ love the church. Come on now, hey, listen,

206
00:12:26,679 --> 00:12:28,880
Speaker 1: we gotta get out of here. Steve. Post your comments

207
00:12:28,880 --> 00:12:32,360
Speaker 1: on today's Strawberry Letter at Steve Harvey FM, on Instagram

208
00:12:32,360 --> 00:12:35,760
Speaker 1: and Facebook. Check out the Strawberry Letter podcast on demand

209
00:12:35,880 --> 00:12:38,800
Speaker 1: please and coming up at forty six minutes after the hour,

210
00:12:39,000 --> 00:12:43,840
Speaker 1: Chiefs fans want the president to know his geography? Please?

211
00:12:45,000 --> 00:12:48,040
Speaker 1: What are you doing now? Oh, you didn't hear about this.

212
00:12:50,080 --> 00:12:55,000
Speaker 1: It's between Kansas and uh miss Missouri. Okay, Kansas City

213
00:12:55,000 --> 00:12:58,120
Speaker 1: and Missouri. This is crazy. We'll be back right after this.

214
00:12:58,640 --> 00:13:01,360
Speaker 1: You're listening main Harday Morning Show