WEBVTT - Social Media Mayhem 0:00:00.200 --> 0:00:03.320 Welcome to Can'tfully Reckless, the production of iHeart Radio and 0:00:03.360 --> 0:00:16.560 the Black Effect. Oh shit, be back on the air, 0:00:16.600 --> 0:00:18.800 Welcome back to you got another carefully reckless episode with 0:00:18.880 --> 0:00:21.599 your girl Jess. Hilarious. So we're gonna jump right in. 0:00:21.760 --> 0:00:24.480 We got some written passages, y'all. Remember I told y'all 0:00:24.480 --> 0:00:26.640 people don't be wanting nobody to catch on today voice 0:00:26.760 --> 0:00:30.760 so we don't have voice notes today. But thank god 0:00:30.920 --> 0:00:34.080 that I can read the non punctuations and shit. So 0:00:34.440 --> 0:00:35.320 we're gonna get it popping. 0:00:35.360 --> 0:00:35.840 Here we go. 0:00:36.560 --> 0:00:39.720 Hey Jess, so I'm gay. Damn hold up. That is 0:00:39.800 --> 0:00:43.920 not how you start a story. God damn it. I 0:00:43.960 --> 0:00:45.960 mean I could see if it was June, but how 0:00:46.040 --> 0:00:50.200 you hey Jess, I'm gay? Like that would oh my god. 0:00:50.360 --> 0:00:53.200 Usually it's like, hey JS, I'm Chris, or Hey Jess, 0:00:53.360 --> 0:00:54.040 I'm Courtney. 0:00:54.200 --> 0:00:58.160 He'll say, hey Jess, I'm gay. Straight off the rippy. 0:00:58.400 --> 0:00:59.240 All right, that's cool. 0:00:59.600 --> 0:01:01.640 And I've been talking to this girl for about two months. 0:01:01.680 --> 0:01:04.240 This will be my first relationship with the girl, and 0:01:04.280 --> 0:01:06.399 I'm actually falling for her. Never thought I would be 0:01:06.400 --> 0:01:08.800 in a relationship with a female, but it's going now. 0:01:08.800 --> 0:01:11.839 We're both pretty popular on social media, and we're both 0:01:11.920 --> 0:01:16.479 active on social media with pretty popular platforms, so we've 0:01:16.520 --> 0:01:18.600 been trying to figure out the perfect. 0:01:18.280 --> 0:01:21.640 Time to pop out. Okay, I understand that we don't 0:01:21.640 --> 0:01:22.480 want to rush anything. 0:01:22.680 --> 0:01:24.680 We just want to make sure we're locked in before 0:01:24.720 --> 0:01:27.880 revealing each other on each other's pages. Nothing wrong with it, 0:01:28.000 --> 0:01:30.039 I can relate, But girls, tell me why. I wake 0:01:30.120 --> 0:01:32.959 up yesterday morning, Osha and I see the green circle 0:01:33.000 --> 0:01:35.399 with her name on it, which means she posted in 0:01:35.440 --> 0:01:37.200 her close friends. I was really saying, what the fuck 0:01:37.240 --> 0:01:38.840 that made? I don't know what a green circle is. 0:01:38.920 --> 0:01:41.280 I don't have no close friends or nothing. All Right, 0:01:41.360 --> 0:01:43.680 I clicked and it was a picture of us, but 0:01:43.800 --> 0:01:45.920 my back was turned. So I'm trying to figure out 0:01:46.240 --> 0:01:48.280 if I should be happy about this or should I 0:01:48.360 --> 0:01:50.800 question it? Because if this is supposed to be the 0:01:50.840 --> 0:01:53.480 pop out, why is the PopOut in your close friends? 0:01:53.760 --> 0:01:54.920 M Okay? 0:01:55.600 --> 0:01:57.600 It also got me thinking who is in her close 0:01:57.640 --> 0:01:59.840 friends and why didn't she post it publicly? 0:02:02.440 --> 0:02:03.960 And then, girl, I'm such an overthinker. 0:02:04.040 --> 0:02:06.280 Maybe she took everybody out of her close friends and 0:02:06.320 --> 0:02:09.600 had me in there by myself, so I can see 0:02:09.600 --> 0:02:12.720 it like she's looking for a reaction or something. What 0:02:12.800 --> 0:02:16.280 do you think, Jess, Hmmm, where it could be a 0:02:16.280 --> 0:02:17.760 couple of things. It could be a couple of things. 0:02:17.800 --> 0:02:20.080 If you two have well, I want to know, have 0:02:20.120 --> 0:02:22.560 you two talked about what that looks like for you 0:02:22.600 --> 0:02:25.840 guys to popping out situation? Have you guys even spoke 0:02:25.919 --> 0:02:28.360 on it, like and had a real conversation about it, 0:02:28.400 --> 0:02:32.640 Because I know with me and my man, he's not 0:02:32.680 --> 0:02:34.640 really big on social media, so he can't relate to 0:02:34.680 --> 0:02:36.639 this story, but I can. But I'm about to go 0:02:36.680 --> 0:02:38.600 back and talk about new exos and I lighted, So 0:02:38.680 --> 0:02:40.639 I'm just going to let y'all let you know this. 0:02:41.880 --> 0:02:44.160 We still did talk about it, Chris and I we 0:02:44.240 --> 0:02:47.399 talked about when we were going to post each other, 0:02:47.440 --> 0:02:49.359 and I bought it up because he wasn't really big 0:02:49.400 --> 0:02:51.320 on social he's still not big on social media and 0:02:51.360 --> 0:02:54.040 he's never really cared about it that much to have 0:02:54.080 --> 0:02:55.840 to do a debut of who his girlfriend is, you 0:02:55.880 --> 0:02:58.079 know what I mean. But I actually did go to 0:02:58.160 --> 0:03:00.360 him and sit down with him and I was like, 0:03:01.480 --> 0:03:02.440 what it looks like for me? 0:03:02.720 --> 0:03:05.639 Is this I think it's time to post you. 0:03:05.919 --> 0:03:08.440 Of course, we were well passed two months, but not 0:03:08.520 --> 0:03:10.560 that far in you know, we were just about like 0:03:10.600 --> 0:03:13.320 six months in or whatever. And the timing doesn't matter. 0:03:13.360 --> 0:03:15.680 It just it just matters if you guys are ready. 0:03:16.320 --> 0:03:18.280 But like you said earlier in your passage, you wanted 0:03:18.320 --> 0:03:20.720 to just see if y'all are locked in. Y'all, you 0:03:20.760 --> 0:03:23.560 want to be completely comfortable with the person before you 0:03:23.600 --> 0:03:25.680 just parade them to the world, before you let somebody, 0:03:25.680 --> 0:03:28.520 because the moment you let somebody into your safe space 0:03:28.560 --> 0:03:31.760 and your relationship is definitely a safe space. You know, 0:03:32.800 --> 0:03:35.280 you want to make sure this is what you want. 0:03:35.400 --> 0:03:37.320 You know, nobody can tell the future. Nobody knows that 0:03:37.320 --> 0:03:39.080 they're going to be with somebody forever, but that's what 0:03:39.120 --> 0:03:41.880 you plan for, right you know, So without being a 0:03:41.880 --> 0:03:44.240 fortune teller, you're just able to react off your feelings. 0:03:44.400 --> 0:03:47.720 And that's what I think your girlfriend might have done 0:03:47.760 --> 0:03:50.280 in this case. Also, I can see why it kind 0:03:50.280 --> 0:03:52.400 of has you thinking in your mind running because like 0:03:52.440 --> 0:03:55.960 you said, this is your first time in a gay relationship, 0:03:56.000 --> 0:03:58.720 this is your first time in a relationship with a woman, 0:03:58.920 --> 0:04:01.280 you know, shall I say, and you just want to 0:04:01.360 --> 0:04:03.960 make sure you know, and I have a stand up 0:04:04.000 --> 0:04:06.560 joke about this, but you want to be careful posting anybody, 0:04:06.880 --> 0:04:09.920 whether it's girl posing a girl, or a man posting 0:04:09.920 --> 0:04:12.360 a man, a woman on man, whatever, Like you want 0:04:12.360 --> 0:04:17.200 to be careful posting whoever you're with, because it seems 0:04:17.279 --> 0:04:19.479 like that's when everything goes to shit when you let 0:04:19.520 --> 0:04:22.039 people in your business. I guess that's the reason for 0:04:22.120 --> 0:04:25.800 the close friends. She could have been waiting to see 0:04:25.839 --> 0:04:28.799 a reaction she could have. I liked that third option 0:04:28.920 --> 0:04:30.960 that you said. You said you're such an overthinker, but 0:04:31.000 --> 0:04:34.760 I don't think that's overthinking. She could have removed everybody 0:04:34.800 --> 0:04:38.120 out of her close friends to just get a reaction 0:04:38.200 --> 0:04:41.120 out of you. What was your reaction, though? Did you 0:04:41.200 --> 0:04:44.039 hit her up about it? You leaven meet off the posadas? 0:04:44.120 --> 0:04:46.360 I mean, I mean you leaving meat off the bones. 0:04:46.680 --> 0:04:49.200 I need to know what happened. I need an update. 0:04:49.279 --> 0:04:51.120 I know you're gonna update me because this ain't my 0:04:51.120 --> 0:04:53.960 first time helping you out, so I'm gonna need an update. 0:04:54.440 --> 0:04:58.400 But I do want to say maybe she didn't go 0:04:58.760 --> 0:04:59.880 so hard with the. 0:05:00.279 --> 0:05:02.760 Because I know y'all have a thousand pictures with each 0:05:02.800 --> 0:05:04.360 other where she could have posed to want to show 0:05:04.360 --> 0:05:04.760 your face? 0:05:05.440 --> 0:05:07.160 But what that have made you upset? 0:05:07.279 --> 0:05:10.120 If she'd posted your face and then I could see 0:05:10.120 --> 0:05:12.960 what you're saying when you said, Okay, if it's a 0:05:13.000 --> 0:05:15.880 pop out, why is any of your close friends? I 0:05:15.880 --> 0:05:18.440 could see that as well. But are you ready for that? 0:05:18.680 --> 0:05:21.000 Have you posted her yet? Have you thought about that? 0:05:21.560 --> 0:05:21.760 You know? 0:05:21.880 --> 0:05:23.680 So it's just a couple of questions that I would 0:05:23.760 --> 0:05:26.320 like to be privy with the answer to, because I 0:05:27.200 --> 0:05:29.839 don't think it was any harm trying to be done 0:05:29.920 --> 0:05:32.440 or anything. I think that she's just trying to leave 0:05:32.440 --> 0:05:34.360 her little mark, you know what I'm saying. I think 0:05:34.400 --> 0:05:37.040 she wants people to know this is my girl without 0:05:37.080 --> 0:05:41.000 actually showing who you are until you are ready to 0:05:41.080 --> 0:05:41.800 post her too. 0:05:42.279 --> 0:05:42.520 You know. 0:05:42.680 --> 0:05:46.039 Also, she one of those females will feel like, well 0:05:46.040 --> 0:05:48.720 is she one of those people? It is not just girls, 0:05:48.760 --> 0:05:51.360 trust me, and she one of those people who feel like, Okay, 0:05:51.400 --> 0:05:53.159 I posted you, now, when you're gonna post me? 0:05:53.680 --> 0:05:53.880 You know? 0:05:54.040 --> 0:05:55.920 Because and I'm not gonna say that's a tip for 0:05:55.960 --> 0:05:57.719 tad thing, but most of the time, when you show 0:05:57.800 --> 0:06:02.520 somebody off, you definitely definitely looking to be showed off eventually, 0:06:02.680 --> 0:06:04.480 not not too long after you. 0:06:04.520 --> 0:06:05.600 Showing somebody off. 0:06:07.240 --> 0:06:09.320 But I definitely like, I like, I like this story 0:06:09.360 --> 0:06:11.719 because it's a lot of that going on. It don't 0:06:11.720 --> 0:06:13.960 matter how old you are, It don't matter how young 0:06:14.000 --> 0:06:16.599 you are, how popular you are on social media. 0:06:17.040 --> 0:06:19.320 You just want to be careful. You just you just 0:06:19.360 --> 0:06:20.359 want to be careful. 0:06:20.560 --> 0:06:25.160 And whether you have a big platform or not, people 0:06:25.200 --> 0:06:26.560 will be scared to post their people. 0:06:26.760 --> 0:06:27.000 You know. 0:06:27.760 --> 0:06:29.040 I know you don't want nobody come and see you 0:06:29.080 --> 0:06:33.240 as a woman. So and both of y'all social media's 0:06:33.320 --> 0:06:38.120 is popping. Y'all got pretty popular platforms, like you said, So, 0:06:39.000 --> 0:06:41.720 I don't know. I think you should kind of sit 0:06:41.800 --> 0:06:43.279 on and talk to her about it, because you damn 0:06:43.320 --> 0:06:45.280 sure ain't telling me whether you hold her up about her. 0:06:45.600 --> 0:06:49.560 Talk to her and just just let me know. But 0:06:49.600 --> 0:06:52.720 I'm absolutely proud of you for telling me your business 0:06:53.320 --> 0:06:56.480 like I tell everybody who sends me in a story. 0:06:56.920 --> 0:06:57.520 Thank y'all. 0:06:57.560 --> 0:06:59.800 Thank y'all for trusting me with your information and trusting 0:06:59.800 --> 0:07:02.840 my life lists, you know, and staying anonymous as well. 0:07:03.360 --> 0:07:06.159 So check back in with me, baby, If you love me, 0:07:06.240 --> 0:07:08.520 you'll listen to this commercial and then we'll be right 0:07:08.560 --> 0:07:10.920 back moving on. 0:07:11.760 --> 0:07:14.840 Hey, Jess, please fix my mess. I've been dating a 0:07:14.880 --> 0:07:18.480 man for sixteen months and it ended last month. Okay, 0:07:18.520 --> 0:07:21.480 So that's a little over a year. Backstory. I met 0:07:21.520 --> 0:07:23.800 him through social media. What is it social media that 0:07:23.840 --> 0:07:27.640 we gonna call this this episode social media. He was 0:07:27.680 --> 0:07:30.560 not working at the time until last January, which I 0:07:30.560 --> 0:07:33.160 helped him expand his job hunt to get the job 0:07:33.200 --> 0:07:35.800 he got and still has. Okay, that's good, I know, 0:07:35.880 --> 0:07:38.560 that's right, supportive queen. He told me he had a 0:07:38.640 --> 0:07:42.480 child on the way. Wait a minute, hold up, okay, 0:07:43.160 --> 0:07:46.240 and I too told him I have kids also, So 0:07:46.360 --> 0:07:50.720 kids are no big deal to me. Yeah, yeah, if 0:07:50.720 --> 0:07:53.280 they are already here, but if they on the way, 0:07:53.320 --> 0:07:55.760 let me just finish reading. He told me he never 0:07:55.840 --> 0:07:58.800 plans on getting back with the child's mother. However, in February, 0:07:58.840 --> 0:08:01.800 the child's mother wanted to work things out. I mean, yeah, 0:08:01.840 --> 0:08:05.040 she was pregnant. That lasted until the beginning of May. 0:08:05.600 --> 0:08:08.880 During that time span, we continue to communication, but the 0:08:08.960 --> 0:08:12.800 dating stopped. However, after he tells me it ended in May, 0:08:13.480 --> 0:08:14.840 it's back to us again. 0:08:15.360 --> 0:08:15.680 Okay. 0:08:16.360 --> 0:08:18.600 Now, from the beginning, we implemented the rules of we're 0:08:18.640 --> 0:08:21.120 only dating each other. Okay, so that means you're only 0:08:21.160 --> 0:08:23.920 dating him, you only dating you and having sex with 0:08:24.000 --> 0:08:26.480 each other. Okay, you only having sex with him, he 0:08:26.560 --> 0:08:29.200 only having sex with you. If someone else did pop 0:08:29.280 --> 0:08:31.239 up in our lives, we would tell each other. Okay, 0:08:31.280 --> 0:08:32.959 so you being honest with him and he being honest 0:08:33.000 --> 0:08:36.480 with you. Now fast forward to December. We're on a 0:08:36.559 --> 0:08:39.240 lunch date and I see his Apple watch. It's a 0:08:39.240 --> 0:08:43.360 selfie picture of him and this one chick uh uh okay, 0:08:43.920 --> 0:08:47.440 and that's it. Listen, I am so so let me. 0:08:47.520 --> 0:08:49.800 Let me let me vent real quick to y'all answers. 0:08:50.320 --> 0:08:54.000 I'm so sick of y'all with these open ended ass stories. Now, 0:08:54.080 --> 0:08:56.439 I'm not gonna be re in this shit no more. 0:08:56.440 --> 0:08:59.760 I'm gonna change the whole fucking trajectory of carefully reckless 0:09:00.000 --> 0:09:03.960 if y'all asses cannot send me a whole fucking story, 0:09:04.480 --> 0:09:06.800 Like why do you guys start and then you stop? 0:09:07.160 --> 0:09:08.960 This is irritating the shit out of me. This is 0:09:09.040 --> 0:09:13.199 like the fourth weekend. I'm sorry, my sister, gret my shoulder, 0:09:13.280 --> 0:09:14.880 Like no, no, no, no, no, what's going on? 0:09:15.040 --> 0:09:15.960 I'm sick of as shit. 0:09:16.080 --> 0:09:18.480 This is like the fourth week in a row that 0:09:18.559 --> 0:09:22.360 these people write these fucking stories and then they stop 0:09:22.559 --> 0:09:25.480 right there. I always make fun of it, like maybe 0:09:25.480 --> 0:09:27.200 a nigga walked in the room while you was typing. 0:09:27.200 --> 0:09:27.480 The shit. 0:09:27.520 --> 0:09:30.480 Okay, I'm sure he ain't staying in the room right now. Shit, 0:09:30.640 --> 0:09:33.440 you this, if it's a two be continued. You come 0:09:33.480 --> 0:09:38.120 back and continue, motherfuck girl. Shit, I don't know what 0:09:38.160 --> 0:09:40.080 the fuck the sound you after that? After you saw 0:09:40.080 --> 0:09:42.719 the selfie of him and the one chick on the 0:09:42.760 --> 0:09:43.360 apple wash? 0:09:43.440 --> 0:09:46.679 What did you do? And was it the baby? Mom? 0:09:47.040 --> 0:09:49.320 What was it? God damn it. 0:09:49.360 --> 0:09:51.920 I want to give you some advice, but I can 0:09:52.040 --> 0:09:54.200 if y'all coming with these open ended stories. 0:09:54.240 --> 0:09:57.040 This shit is crazy. So basically, now I'm about to 0:09:57.040 --> 0:09:58.280 get in your ass because where you. 0:09:58.400 --> 0:10:01.640 Turn, where you went wrong at anyway, was getting with 0:10:01.640 --> 0:10:03.240 a nigga who had a baby on the way. 0:10:03.400 --> 0:10:06.560 Now, I don't give a fuck. I've been through them all. 0:10:06.880 --> 0:10:10.680 I've been in almost every situation that somebody that I 0:10:10.760 --> 0:10:13.320 read on these on this hip podcast like that somebody 0:10:13.360 --> 0:10:16.200 has giving me. I've either been through it or I 0:10:16.240 --> 0:10:17.520 know somebody who has. 0:10:17.800 --> 0:10:20.560 But that's a red flag right there. 0:10:21.440 --> 0:10:24.920 A guy got a woman pregnant and then he's still 0:10:25.000 --> 0:10:27.760 dating while she's pregnant. Listen, when I was pregnant with Ashton, 0:10:28.520 --> 0:10:31.040 Rome was dating. Of course, he told people that he 0:10:31.120 --> 0:10:32.800 wasn't gonna be with me. But where was he at 0:10:32.800 --> 0:10:35.760 every fucking night with his girlfriend me? You know what 0:10:35.800 --> 0:10:38.280 I'm saying, A nigga gonna say whatever the fuck he 0:10:38.400 --> 0:10:42.240 can to get what he wants. Of course, the girl 0:10:42.400 --> 0:10:44.360 was telling them he wanted to be with her, She 0:10:44.440 --> 0:10:46.440 wanted to be with him and work things out. They 0:10:46.520 --> 0:10:49.120 was probably just going through it because of hormonal changes 0:10:49.240 --> 0:10:49.959 or she must have. 0:10:50.160 --> 0:10:53.240 You know, girl, if you've never oh yeah, you have 0:10:53.360 --> 0:10:53.800 had babies. 0:10:53.840 --> 0:10:55.320 Okay, I was gonna say, if you've never been pregnant, 0:10:55.360 --> 0:10:57.040 you don't understand you got kids. 0:10:57.080 --> 0:10:57.719 You ain't got one. 0:10:57.760 --> 0:10:59.880 You got kids talking about You told them in what 0:11:00.120 --> 0:11:03.280 no big deal? Yeah, damn right, it's a big deal. 0:11:04.040 --> 0:11:06.439 It has to be a big deal if his kid's 0:11:06.480 --> 0:11:08.480 not here yet. But I like how you said you 0:11:08.480 --> 0:11:10.920 stopped talking to him and that was that, and then 0:11:11.800 --> 0:11:14.400 you fans forward a little bit. So when he told 0:11:14.480 --> 0:11:16.800 you that it ended in May, and then you said 0:11:16.800 --> 0:11:20.000 it was back to y'all again, all right, cool? And 0:11:20.080 --> 0:11:23.880 so then you lay down some rules because giving how 0:11:23.920 --> 0:11:27.520 it was going before, I know, when you know he 0:11:27.600 --> 0:11:29.400 spent the block or you spent the block. You know, 0:11:29.880 --> 0:11:31.640 y'all had to lay down some ground rules, because there 0:11:31.679 --> 0:11:34.680 was certainly some groundwork that that should have been done, 0:11:34.800 --> 0:11:36.280 you know, because you didn't want the same thing that 0:11:36.600 --> 0:11:41.080 happened before to happen again. Cool, but obviously he broke 0:11:41.160 --> 0:11:44.959 that rule because when you all at lunch, a selfie 0:11:44.960 --> 0:11:46.680 pop up on your phone and I don't know what 0:11:46.720 --> 0:11:47.679 else so you need to do. 0:11:47.800 --> 0:11:49.000 I'm not even gonna milk this shit. 0:11:49.160 --> 0:11:51.760 Try to stretch it or whatever you need to let 0:11:51.760 --> 0:11:53.560 me know what else happened. 0:11:53.600 --> 0:11:56.080 And if you don't, oh fucking well, pissing me off 0:11:56.080 --> 0:12:02.520 of this shit. God damn it. Fuck girl, I'm shit. 0:12:02.600 --> 0:12:04.840 They off my sister in here, like just like a 0:12:05.000 --> 0:12:10.800 calm down. How I hate when they do that. Lord, 0:12:11.280 --> 0:12:13.200 hold up, hold up, I know this shit getting good. 0:12:13.200 --> 0:12:15.520 But listen to just a couple seconds of a commercial. 0:12:15.520 --> 0:12:19.880 If you love me, you'll listen. Okay, got another story 0:12:19.920 --> 0:12:23.320 for you. First off, Happy New Year is just listen. 0:12:23.360 --> 0:12:27.520 I'm gonna tell y'all one more time, it's happy New Year. 0:12:28.000 --> 0:12:29.319 How it's gonna be more than one year? 0:12:29.360 --> 0:12:32.680 Is? It's happy new Year. We go, we go a 0:12:32.760 --> 0:12:35.640 year at a time, but Happy New Year to YouTube boom. 0:12:36.000 --> 0:12:39.160 I'm just a woman who feels alone. Yes, I'm married, 0:12:39.240 --> 0:12:42.000 I'm a mother, I'm an auntie, I'm a daughter, and 0:12:42.080 --> 0:12:45.000 I only had one friend, my best friend of forty 0:12:45.040 --> 0:12:48.760 five years. Okay, even with this, I feel alone. The 0:12:48.800 --> 0:12:51.680 first man in your life is your father, who teaches 0:12:51.720 --> 0:12:54.280 you how a man should love you. My dad was 0:12:54.280 --> 0:12:57.840 a great dad. However, in eighty nine, my father started 0:12:57.920 --> 0:12:59.600 using crack and drinking up a storm. 0:13:00.000 --> 0:13:02.680 Our world has been turned upside down. Oh wow. 0:13:03.160 --> 0:13:06.840 He started to physically abuse my mother. I loved my mother, 0:13:07.000 --> 0:13:10.080 but she was weak. Many years go by, she found 0:13:10.080 --> 0:13:13.440 her strength to leave my father and later passed in 0:13:13.559 --> 0:13:14.199 ninety seven. 0:13:14.400 --> 0:13:15.000 I'm sorry. 0:13:15.679 --> 0:13:17.720 I then took care of my father with his addiction 0:13:18.240 --> 0:13:20.600 because my older brother and younger sister didn't want to 0:13:20.640 --> 0:13:21.160 deal with him. 0:13:21.520 --> 0:13:22.720 I understand that as well. 0:13:23.400 --> 0:13:27.040 Fast forward, my father passed in twenty fifteen. He lived 0:13:27.040 --> 0:13:30.079 a long time after that though, So that's that's something 0:13:30.080 --> 0:13:33.360 to be grateful to God for. By ninety seven, I 0:13:33.400 --> 0:13:36.360 met the man of my dreams. We had two children, 0:13:36.559 --> 0:13:39.920 one boy and one girl. After fourteen years together, we 0:13:39.920 --> 0:13:44.000 were married. Biggest mistake of my life. Damn, after fourteen 0:13:44.080 --> 0:13:47.520 years somethingwha wasn't a mistake. He was so kind and loving. 0:13:48.120 --> 0:13:55.000 Then things changed. He's so disrespectful, y'all. Naya hold on, Wade, 0:13:55.240 --> 0:13:59.079 it stopped. I don't know if this is an error 0:13:59.800 --> 0:14:03.040 or what the fuck this is. I maybe it's something 0:14:03.080 --> 0:14:06.800 going on with this shit, because that that story stopped 0:14:07.040 --> 0:14:10.760 like that too. But then how is somebody how some 0:14:10.840 --> 0:14:15.160 of them getting through and some of them not unless 0:14:15.200 --> 0:14:16.520 all of y'all just not finishing. 0:14:16.600 --> 0:14:18.400 What the fuck is going on? Y'all? 0:14:18.920 --> 0:14:22.800 I can't even give full advice. I don't know what 0:14:22.880 --> 0:14:26.880 she wants. I mean, I know she feels alone. I'm 0:14:26.920 --> 0:14:30.520 sorry about hearing the story about your parents, both your 0:14:30.520 --> 0:14:33.200 mom and your dad. You lost them, and you know 0:14:33.280 --> 0:14:37.920 you definitely was a blessed daughter to have taken care 0:14:38.000 --> 0:14:40.880 of your father after seeing him struggle with such an 0:14:40.920 --> 0:14:44.680 addiction and you know, be physically abusive and mentally abusive 0:14:44.720 --> 0:14:47.960 to your mom. I don't like how you called her 0:14:48.000 --> 0:14:51.440 week though. You know, you just don't know what she 0:14:51.600 --> 0:14:53.160 was going through in that time. She could have been 0:14:53.800 --> 0:14:57.280 battling depression, she could have been you know. And again, 0:14:57.840 --> 0:15:00.320 I'm not trying to change how you feel. You because 0:15:00.360 --> 0:15:02.080 you know your mother. You knew your mother more than 0:15:02.680 --> 0:15:05.080 I did or any of us listening. You know what 0:15:05.120 --> 0:15:07.720 I'm saying, But I'm sure if there was something that 0:15:07.760 --> 0:15:09.920 she could have done to not be in that situation, 0:15:10.240 --> 0:15:13.040 I'm sure she would have done it for you and 0:15:13.280 --> 0:15:16.240 your sibling's sake. You also went on to tell me, 0:15:16.280 --> 0:15:19.600 after fourteen years off you and your children's father being together, 0:15:19.840 --> 0:15:23.960 that was a big mistake you married him. Things changed. 0:15:24.440 --> 0:15:27.560 He was disrespectful and mentally and emotionally. 0:15:27.080 --> 0:15:28.200 And verbally abusive. 0:15:28.800 --> 0:15:31.480 So if you can say that your mom was weak 0:15:31.640 --> 0:15:34.760 for taking that abuse from your father, and the same 0:15:34.840 --> 0:15:39.240 breath as you taking the abuse, then what does that 0:15:39.320 --> 0:15:42.800 make you. You wouldn't call yourself a weak woman, right right? 0:15:43.080 --> 0:15:44.880 And you know how they say the apple don't fall 0:15:44.960 --> 0:15:46.640 far from the tree. 0:15:46.720 --> 0:15:47.760 I'm not insulting you. 0:15:47.800 --> 0:15:50.320 I just want you to realize you called your mother weak, 0:15:50.360 --> 0:15:52.440 and you would be upset if I were to call 0:15:52.480 --> 0:15:56.240 you weak. I don't know what your mental stability is like. 0:15:56.280 --> 0:15:58.600 I don't know what your mental health is like. I 0:15:58.600 --> 0:16:00.480 don't know the status of your mental health. I don't 0:16:00.480 --> 0:16:03.520 know what you're going through. I do know that you're 0:16:03.520 --> 0:16:05.440 a mom and you have to live for your children. 0:16:05.480 --> 0:16:08.000 You know you have to raise your children. You have 0:16:08.080 --> 0:16:11.560 to be mentally stable enough to raise your children. You 0:16:11.600 --> 0:16:13.600 have to be Okay, it sounds as if you need 0:16:13.640 --> 0:16:16.400 therapy because you started off saying that you're alone. You're 0:16:16.560 --> 0:16:19.400 a forty five year woman and you're alone. You have 0:16:19.440 --> 0:16:21.800 one best friend, you have one friend. This is not 0:16:21.840 --> 0:16:24.360 going to make you feel any better, I suppose. But 0:16:24.480 --> 0:16:27.160 there are people with no friends, no family, no siblings, 0:16:27.200 --> 0:16:30.720 know nothing. You know, so let's look around and see 0:16:30.720 --> 0:16:33.840 what you do have and get some therapy. That's all 0:16:33.880 --> 0:16:36.200 I can tell you right now, because I don't know 0:16:36.240 --> 0:16:41.520 what else your story is. I'm gonna look further into 0:16:42.120 --> 0:16:43.960 what the hell may be going on with Instagram because 0:16:43.960 --> 0:16:47.400 I know all of y'all can't be this like dense 0:16:47.480 --> 0:16:51.080 to keep stopping a goddamn story. And I'm sorry, I'm 0:16:51.120 --> 0:16:54.800 just like, what the fuck is going on? But okay, 0:16:54.920 --> 0:16:58.680 last story and then we are going to end this episode, y'all. 0:16:59.040 --> 0:16:59.320 Okay? 0:16:59.320 --> 0:17:03.840 So I think I read this one last last week, 0:17:03.880 --> 0:17:05.960 but this guy came back. He said, I have a question. 0:17:06.240 --> 0:17:09.040 Is it bad for a guy my age to still 0:17:09.080 --> 0:17:11.879 be a virgin without choice? I never smoked, dranked, or 0:17:11.920 --> 0:17:15.320 slept with anyone, and I feel embarrassed. I'm twenty seven 0:17:15.680 --> 0:17:18.720 I think I'm gonna be forever a virgin. Sadly, I'm 0:17:18.760 --> 0:17:21.959 an in cell. You are fucking what I don't even 0:17:22.000 --> 0:17:25.119 know what that means. And I'm not choosing this because 0:17:25.160 --> 0:17:29.800 I want to. Beautiful women don't want me. You're twenty seven, 0:17:29.840 --> 0:17:32.119 You're a virgin. You're never taking a drug in your life. 0:17:32.200 --> 0:17:34.480 And by that, I mean you said you never smoked, 0:17:35.000 --> 0:17:41.680 you never dranked or anything. You feel embarrassed, Well, what 0:17:42.480 --> 0:17:44.639 else do you tell me more about yourself? This is 0:17:44.680 --> 0:17:47.120 also opening it as well. I mean you you finished it. 0:17:47.119 --> 0:17:51.720 It's just that most guys don't really leave a lot 0:17:51.720 --> 0:17:54.240 of meat on the bone as well. I do want to, 0:17:54.240 --> 0:17:57.400 first and foremost say thank you for even exposing this 0:17:57.640 --> 0:17:58.679 little part for me. 0:17:58.840 --> 0:18:01.880 You know, of your life. I definitely can understand why 0:18:01.920 --> 0:18:03.719 you feel embarrassed. 0:18:04.400 --> 0:18:07.160 You shouldn't be. I mean, twenty seven. That just means 0:18:07.160 --> 0:18:08.480 when you do get some, it's going to be a 0:18:08.480 --> 0:18:11.920 magical moment for you, honey. Like you know, make sure 0:18:12.119 --> 0:18:15.439 because you have held your virginity up to par for 0:18:15.480 --> 0:18:17.199 so long, that you don't just give it away to 0:18:17.200 --> 0:18:18.040 any fucking body. 0:18:18.160 --> 0:18:20.320 I mean, because you have not come this far just 0:18:20.320 --> 0:18:23.160 to go grab some chlamydia, all right, so just make 0:18:23.200 --> 0:18:27.680 sure that it's you know, my sister is like nigger. 0:18:29.560 --> 0:18:31.959 But seriously, shit, you know, it's a lot of men 0:18:32.000 --> 0:18:35.600 out here who got bodies on bodies on bodies, you 0:18:35.600 --> 0:18:38.200 know what I'm saying. And I'm pretty sure there is 0:18:38.200 --> 0:18:40.359 a woman out there who could appreciate meeting a twenty 0:18:40.359 --> 0:18:43.200 seven year old virgin because she would be at first, 0:18:43.320 --> 0:18:47.280 you know, and hopefully you meet somebody like Yvonne Orgy. 0:18:47.560 --> 0:18:53.800